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1
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:06,875
LAST TIME ON
3RD ROCK FROM THE SUN...
2
00:00:06,908 --> 00:00:08,176
Sally:
LIEUTENANT'S LOG,
3
00:00:08,209 --> 00:00:09,477
RUTHERFORD, OHIO,
IS OVERRUN
4
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,346
BY A GROUP OF GORGEOUS,
MANIPULATIVE VENUSIANS.
5
00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:14,182
ALL THE MEN ARE BLINDED
BY THEIR BEAUTY
6
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:15,483
DICK WITH GABRIELLA...
7
00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:16,618
TOMMY WITH CHLOE...
8
00:00:16,651 --> 00:00:19,120
AND HARRY TOTALLY
LOSES IT FOR MASCHA.
9
00:00:19,153 --> 00:00:20,555
MEANWHILE, MARY
AND NINA GET...
10
00:00:20,589 --> 00:00:22,323
TICKET'S
TO THE SUPER BOWL!
11
00:00:22,356 --> 00:00:23,324
EEE!
12
00:00:23,357 --> 00:00:25,426
Sally:
AND HEAD TO SAN DIEGO
FOR THE BIG GAME.
13
00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:27,161
JUST AS I STUMBLE
UPON THE VENUSIANS'
14
00:00:27,195 --> 00:00:29,864
DIABOLICAL PLAN
OF TOTAL WORLD DOMINATION,
15
00:00:29,898 --> 00:00:31,566
THEY KIDNAP ME
AND TAKE ME TO CALIFORNIA.
16
00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:33,668
AAAAHHHHHH!
17
00:00:33,702 --> 00:00:34,903
THE GUYS FINALLY CATCH ON
18
00:00:34,936 --> 00:00:37,038
AND HEAD WEST
TO TRY AND SAVE ME.
19
00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:38,940
BOY, AM I SCREWED.
20
00:00:38,973 --> 00:00:40,441
LET'S GO!
21
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,990
SO, UH, YOU GUYS
NOTICED ANY SUDDEN
INFLUX OF, UH,
22
00:01:29,023 --> 00:01:30,558
ATTRACTIVE WOMEN
AROUND THESE PARTS?
23
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:33,995
OH, YEAH, A WHOLE
BUNCH CAME THROUGH.
24
00:01:34,028 --> 00:01:34,495
REALLY?
25
00:01:34,528 --> 00:01:36,430
TALL, EXOTIC, SCARY?
26
00:01:36,464 --> 00:01:37,298
THAT'S THEM.
27
00:01:37,331 --> 00:01:38,900
WE'RE HOT ON
THE TRAIL, BOYS!
28
00:01:38,933 --> 00:01:40,635
IF YOU BUMP INTO ONE
NAMED ESTROVIA,
29
00:01:40,669 --> 00:01:42,070
TELL HER GLEN SAYS HI.
30
00:01:42,103 --> 00:01:43,604
RIGHT.
31
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:57,418
UHH!
32
00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:58,319
OHH!
33
00:01:58,352 --> 00:01:59,821
THIS STUFF
IS TERRIBLE!
34
00:01:59,854 --> 00:02:01,823
DICK, IT'S
GOT TWIGS IN IT.
35
00:02:01,856 --> 00:02:04,592
TWIGS ARE THE MEAT
OF THE DESERT.
36
00:02:05,660 --> 00:02:07,796
OK, I NEVER THOUGHT
I'D SAY THIS,
37
00:02:07,829 --> 00:02:09,297
BUT I MISS
SALLY'S COOKING.
38
00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:10,264
YEAH.
39
00:02:10,298 --> 00:02:11,565
IN ALL THE HORRIBLE MEALS
SHE EVER COOKED US,
40
00:02:11,599 --> 00:02:14,068
SHE NEVER ONCE
TRIED TO FEED US WOOD.
41
00:02:14,102 --> 00:02:15,503
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
42
00:02:15,536 --> 00:02:17,271
IS THAT YOUR CELL PHONE?
43
00:02:17,305 --> 00:02:19,841
NO, IT'S NOT
MY CELL PHONE.
44
00:02:19,874 --> 00:02:20,742
IS IT YOUR
CELL PHONE?
45
00:02:20,775 --> 00:02:24,045
WE DON'T HAVE CELL PHONES.
WE'RE FROM OHIO.
46
00:02:24,078 --> 00:02:25,847
OH, WAIT A SECOND.
47
00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,215
IT'S MASCHA'S
COMPACT.
48
00:02:27,248 --> 00:02:28,349
WHOO!
49
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:29,017
SHOULD I ANSWER IT?
50
00:02:29,050 --> 00:02:30,484
UH, NO! TOMMY,
YOU ANSWER IT.
51
00:02:30,518 --> 00:02:31,886
WHY ME?
BECAUSE YOU
LOOK LIKE A GIRL.
52
00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:33,454
OH, OK--
53
00:02:37,225 --> 00:02:39,861
[FEMININE VOICE]
HELLO?
54
00:02:39,894 --> 00:02:42,731
ATTENTION, ALL MEMBERS
OF GROUP 7.
55
00:02:42,764 --> 00:02:46,901
RENDEZVOUS TOMORROW MORNING
AT EXIT 11, ROUTE 66.
56
00:02:46,935 --> 00:02:49,603
SOUNDS GOOD.
OVER AND OUT.
57
00:02:49,637 --> 00:02:53,007
AND PUT SOME MAKEUP ON.
YOU LOOK LIKE A BOY.
58
00:03:00,381 --> 00:03:01,282
HARRY, YOU'RE
BURNING THE MAP!
59
00:03:01,315 --> 00:03:02,516
WHAT? WAAAAA!
60
00:03:02,550 --> 00:03:05,954
OUT! OUT! OUT!
GET IT OUT!
GET IT OUT!
61
00:03:07,188 --> 00:03:09,190
I'M SORRY.
62
00:03:09,223 --> 00:03:10,624
WELL, I DON'T SEE ANY
OF THESE WOMEN AROUND.
63
00:03:10,658 --> 00:03:12,193
WELL, THIS IS EXIT 11.
64
00:03:12,226 --> 00:03:14,095
HARRY, YOU LOOK AROUND.
I'LL GET US SUPPLIES.
65
00:03:14,128 --> 00:03:15,663
WAIT, DICK, WE DON'T
HAVE ANY MONEY.
66
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:20,234
UH, WATCH THIS.
I KNOW HOW THESE
TRADING POSTS WORK.
67
00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:22,436
GREETINGS. WE GIVE YOU
68
00:03:22,470 --> 00:03:24,906
BLANKETS
AND SHINY HUBCAP.
69
00:03:24,939 --> 00:03:29,243
YOU GIVE US CHILI DOGS
AND GAS.
70
00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:32,080
GREETINGS,
WHITE EYES.
71
00:03:32,113 --> 00:03:35,449
WE TAKE CASH
OR CREDIT CARD.
72
00:03:35,483 --> 00:03:36,751
WHERE'S THE BATHROOM?
73
00:03:36,785 --> 00:03:38,219
THEY'RE NOT PAY TOILETS,
ARE THEY?
74
00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:39,087
NO.
75
00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:40,755
FINE.
76
00:03:43,892 --> 00:03:45,860
WHERE'S THE MOST
EXPENSIVE JEWELRY?
77
00:03:45,894 --> 00:03:47,361
RIGHT HERE.
78
00:03:47,395 --> 00:03:50,098
HELLO, MASCHA.
79
00:03:50,131 --> 00:03:51,665
HARRY, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
80
00:03:51,699 --> 00:03:54,502
DON'T PLAY ME, BABY.
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU.
81
00:03:54,535 --> 00:03:55,736
AND WHAT HAVE YOU
DONE WITH SALLY?
82
00:03:55,770 --> 00:03:58,840
I CAN'T TELL
YOU ANYTHING.
I WISH I COULD.
83
00:03:58,873 --> 00:04:01,209
CAN YOU
GIVE ME A HINT?
84
00:04:02,310 --> 00:04:04,112
WE'RE DOING SOMETHING,
85
00:04:04,145 --> 00:04:06,080
SOMETHING BIG,
86
00:04:06,114 --> 00:04:07,248
SUNDAY,
87
00:04:07,281 --> 00:04:09,650
IN SAN DIEGO.
88
00:04:11,285 --> 00:04:14,022
IS THAT ALL
YOU CAN TELL ME?
89
00:04:14,055 --> 00:04:17,391
SUNDAY...
AT A STADIUM...
90
00:04:17,425 --> 00:04:19,593
IN SAN DIEGO.
91
00:04:21,229 --> 00:04:24,933
JUST ONE CLUE,
FOR OLD TIME'S SAKE?
92
00:04:24,966 --> 00:04:26,968
AT THE SUPER BOWL!
93
00:04:27,001 --> 00:04:28,302
WORK WITH ME, BABY!
94
00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:31,205
WHICH SUPER BOWL?
95
00:04:31,239 --> 00:04:33,374
I HAVE TO GO NOW, HARRY.
96
00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:37,178
WHY ARE THE CUTE ONES
ALWAYS SO DUMB?
97
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:40,915
COME ON, BOYS!
98
00:04:40,949 --> 00:04:43,985
WE'RE GOING
TO SAN FRANCISCO!
99
00:04:44,018 --> 00:04:45,119
Mascha:
SAN DIEGO!
100
00:04:45,153 --> 00:04:47,655
SAN DIEGO!
101
00:04:49,891 --> 00:04:51,659
Sally:
LIEUTENANT'S LOG.
102
00:04:51,692 --> 00:04:53,461
I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG
I'VE BEEN HERE.
103
00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:55,763
I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG
THEY'RE GONNA KEEP ME.
104
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,399
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I KNOW ANYMORE.
105
00:04:58,432 --> 00:05:02,003
ON THE PLUS SIDE,
MY SKIN LOOKS GREAT.
106
00:05:03,304 --> 00:05:04,705
SO WHAT ARE YOU?
107
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,040
I AM A VENUSIAN.
108
00:05:06,074 --> 00:05:07,675
WHAT DO VENUSIANS DO?
109
00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:11,913
THEY SEIZE CONTROL
AND MAKE IT LOOK
EFFORTLESS.
110
00:05:11,946 --> 00:05:15,683
HOW MANY VENUSIANS
DOES IT TAKE TO
SCREW IN A LIGHT BULB?
111
00:05:18,319 --> 00:05:19,687
NONE.
112
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,423
THEY GET A
MAN TO DO IT.
113
00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:28,462
OK, LET'S SEE SOME
BAD GIRL ATTITUDE.
114
00:05:28,496 --> 00:05:30,999
[MUSIC PLAYS]
115
00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:37,405
NOW A FRIGHTENED WAIF.
116
00:05:45,079 --> 00:05:48,516
PARTY GIRL.
117
00:05:50,318 --> 00:05:52,586
WELL, SHE'S
GETTING THERE.
118
00:05:52,620 --> 00:05:54,622
NOT REALLY.
119
00:05:58,426 --> 00:06:00,528
HELLO, I'D LIKE 3 TICKETS
TO THE SUPER BOWL, PLEASE.
120
00:06:00,561 --> 00:06:01,662
GOOD ONES.
YEAH,
50-YARD LINE.
121
00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:03,297
SKY BOX.
122
00:06:03,331 --> 00:06:06,167
SOLD OUT? BUT THE GAME
DOESN'T START FOR 8 HOURS.
123
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,769
HELLO? HELLO--
124
00:06:08,802 --> 00:06:10,071
WELL, WHAT ARE WE
GONNA DO NOW?
125
00:06:10,104 --> 00:06:12,740
IF ONLY
WE KNEW SOMEONE
WHO HAD TICKETS.
126
00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:14,475
HMM.
HMM.
HMM.
127
00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:16,377
LIKE MARY.
128
00:06:16,410 --> 00:06:19,247
HMM.
HMM.
HMM.
129
00:06:23,551 --> 00:06:24,752
THIS IS RIDICULOUS!
130
00:06:24,785 --> 00:06:26,454
THE HOTEL SHOULD HAVE
TO WARN THEIR GUESTS
131
00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:28,156
THAT PEOPLE FROM
THE HALF-TIME SHOW
132
00:06:28,189 --> 00:06:29,924
ARE STAYING HERE.
133
00:06:29,958 --> 00:06:32,660
HE SHOOTS,
HE SCORES!
134
00:06:32,693 --> 00:06:35,263
GET KILLED.
135
00:06:38,399 --> 00:06:40,001
YOU'VE DONE WELL.
136
00:06:40,034 --> 00:06:41,635
OH, THANK YOU.
137
00:06:41,669 --> 00:06:43,604
I'M STARVING.
138
00:06:47,508 --> 00:06:48,509
[GASPS]
139
00:06:49,277 --> 00:06:50,278
OHH.
140
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:03,257
I'M FULL!
141
00:07:11,332 --> 00:07:12,633
MORNIN' FELLAS.
142
00:07:12,666 --> 00:07:13,634
COME ON IN.
143
00:07:13,667 --> 00:07:14,602
WHAT HAVE I MISSED?
144
00:07:14,635 --> 00:07:16,971
A LOT. YOU MISSED
ESPN 2's PREVIEW
145
00:07:17,005 --> 00:07:20,474
OF THE ESPN SUPER BOWL
PREGAME SHOW.
146
00:07:20,508 --> 00:07:21,976
AND THE CNBC
PREGAME SHOW,
147
00:07:22,010 --> 00:07:23,144
WHICH IS
THE FIRST PREVIEW
148
00:07:23,177 --> 00:07:26,047
OF THE NBC
SUPER BOWL
PRE-PREGAME PREVIEW.
149
00:07:26,080 --> 00:07:27,681
GRAB YOURSELF
A WAFFLE AND A BEER.
150
00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:31,519
IT'S ONLY T-MINUS
6 HOURS TO KICKOFF.
151
00:07:32,820 --> 00:07:34,255
* HOW LOOSE
IS YOUR GOOSE? *
152
00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:36,490
* HOW FUNKY IS
YOUR MONKEY? *
153
00:07:38,059 --> 00:07:40,194
OH, MY GOD! WHAT
ARE YOU PEOPLE ON?
154
00:07:40,228 --> 00:07:43,597
WILL YOU SHUT UP?!
155
00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:45,633
YOU WANT TO CHECK OUT
THE CONTINENTAL BREAKFAST?
156
00:07:45,666 --> 00:07:46,734
I HEAR IT'S
NEXT TO THE BAR.
157
00:07:46,767 --> 00:07:48,602
LET'S GO.
158
00:07:57,345 --> 00:07:59,780
FIND THE TICKETS.
159
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:03,117
AH, YES. SHE'S EITHER HIDDEN
THEM UNDER THE CARPET
160
00:08:03,151 --> 00:08:05,153
OR SEWED THEM
INTO THE CHAIR.
161
00:08:05,186 --> 00:08:05,886
FOUND THEM.
162
00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:07,055
WHERE WERE THEY?
IN THE DRAWER.
163
00:08:07,088 --> 00:08:08,089
GENIUS!
164
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:10,258
* HOW
165
00:08:10,291 --> 00:08:11,959
* FUNKY IS
YOUR MONKEY *
166
00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:20,534
ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.
167
00:08:20,568 --> 00:08:23,604
WOW! THAT BABY
HAS A BIG HEAD.
168
00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:26,240
WELL, IT, UH,
RUNS IN THE FAMILY.
169
00:08:26,274 --> 00:08:27,875
AND THE HAIR?
170
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:29,410
YES, I KNOW.
171
00:08:29,443 --> 00:08:33,013
WE HAVE
A VERY UGLY BABY.
172
00:08:33,047 --> 00:08:36,584
HEY, VIVIAN!
COME LOOK AT THIS
BABY'S HEAD!
173
00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:38,152
WHY DON'T
YOU SHOVE YOUR
LITTLE COMMENTS--
174
00:08:38,186 --> 00:08:43,291
OH, IS HE THIRSTY?
HE'S THIRSTY.
175
00:08:44,258 --> 00:08:46,160
GET ME OUT
OF THIS THING!
176
00:08:47,228 --> 00:08:49,563
HARRY, PUSH! PUSH!
177
00:08:50,164 --> 00:08:51,399
Dick: LOOK,
THERE THEY ARE!
178
00:08:51,432 --> 00:08:52,333
Harry:
IT'S CHLOE.
179
00:08:52,366 --> 00:08:53,067
Dick:
AND GABRIELLA.
180
00:08:53,101 --> 00:08:53,667
WHAT SHOULD WE DO?
181
00:08:53,701 --> 00:08:54,702
LET'S MAKE OUT
WITH THEM.
182
00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,170
SHUT UP!
183
00:08:56,204 --> 00:08:58,206
THEY'RE GOING TO
THE LADIES' ROOM.
WE GOTTA FOLLOW THEM.
184
00:08:58,239 --> 00:09:01,075
TOMMY, YOU GO FIRST.
YOU LOOK LIKE A GIRL.
185
00:09:01,109 --> 00:09:04,345
AS SOON AS WE GET BACK,
I'M GETTING A HAIRCUT.
186
00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:12,886
WHERE'D THEY GO?
187
00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:14,322
WHOA, DICK,
HOLD ON A SECOND.
188
00:09:14,355 --> 00:09:15,423
OH, TOMMY, NOT NOW.
189
00:09:15,456 --> 00:09:17,891
NO, NO, COME HERE.
190
00:09:19,393 --> 00:09:20,894
UHH!
OHH!
191
00:09:23,097 --> 00:09:23,731
DICK?
192
00:09:23,764 --> 00:09:24,598
WHAT?
193
00:09:24,632 --> 00:09:26,066
I HAVE TO USE
THE BATHROOM.
194
00:09:26,100 --> 00:09:27,768
ME, TOO.
NOT NOW!
195
00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:28,736
OHH!
196
00:09:28,769 --> 00:09:30,138
OHH!
197
00:09:30,171 --> 00:09:31,672
OHH!
OHH!
OHH!
198
00:09:35,143 --> 00:09:37,678
THIS IS THE BIGGEST
LADIES' ROOM
I'VE EVER SEEN.
199
00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:39,213
OHH!
OHH!
OHH!
200
00:09:48,856 --> 00:09:51,525
STOP!
I HEAR SOMETHING.
201
00:09:51,559 --> 00:09:53,194
I DON'T
SEE ANYTHING.
202
00:09:53,227 --> 00:09:55,396
ALL CLEAR!
203
00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:01,769
LET'S GO...
GENTLEMEN.
204
00:10:20,588 --> 00:10:23,056
Prell: LET THEM GO.
205
00:10:24,091 --> 00:10:27,761
THAT'S NO WAY
TO TREAT OUR GUESTS.
206
00:10:27,795 --> 00:10:29,363
CAPPUCCINO, GENTLEMEN?
207
00:10:29,397 --> 00:10:30,598
WELL, WHAT ELSE
DO YOU GOT BACK--
208
00:10:30,631 --> 00:10:33,066
TAKE THE CAPPUCCINO!
209
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:35,469
PANTENE, BRECK!
210
00:10:35,503 --> 00:10:37,805
GET OUR VISITORS
A REFRESHMENT.
211
00:10:37,838 --> 00:10:39,873
WHERE'S MY
SISTER SALLY?!
212
00:10:39,907 --> 00:10:43,977
PERT! PERT PLUS,
BRING OUT THE NEW ONE.
213
00:10:45,713 --> 00:10:47,881
SALLY.
214
00:10:47,915 --> 00:10:49,750
MY NAME IS
NO LONGER SALLY.
215
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:53,454
I NOW GO
BY THE NAME...
PAUL MITCHELL.
216
00:10:53,487 --> 00:10:55,889
SO, READY TO DIE?
217
00:10:55,923 --> 00:10:58,359
THAT'S IT!
YOU TELL HER, SALLY.
218
00:10:58,392 --> 00:11:00,628
I WAS TALKING TO YOU.
219
00:11:00,661 --> 00:11:01,995
OH.
220
00:11:11,339 --> 00:11:13,106
THESE AREN'T
SUPER BOWL TICKETS.
221
00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:13,907
YES, THEY ARE.
222
00:11:13,941 --> 00:11:15,943
THESE ARE TICKETS
TO OCEAN WORLD.
223
00:11:15,976 --> 00:11:17,010
NO, THEY'RE NOT.
224
00:11:17,044 --> 00:11:19,213
SEE THAT BIG FISH?
225
00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:23,016
IT'S NOT A FISH,
IT'S A MAMMAL.
226
00:11:23,050 --> 00:11:25,018
MOVE ON OUT OF THE WAY.
227
00:11:25,052 --> 00:11:26,987
MOVE!
228
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,956
NEXT!
229
00:11:31,325 --> 00:11:34,662
WHY ARE YOU
WEARING PASTA?
230
00:11:36,129 --> 00:11:37,565
I JUST LIKE IT.
231
00:11:37,598 --> 00:11:40,601
WELL, GET RID OF IT.
IT CHEAPENS UP THE PLACE.
232
00:11:40,634 --> 00:11:42,470
WHAT IS YOUR
EVIL PLAN, PRELL?
233
00:11:42,503 --> 00:11:46,707
ARE YOU GONNA KEEP
US HERE AND MAKE US
YOUR SEX SLAVES?
234
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:47,641
NO.
235
00:11:47,675 --> 00:11:48,609
ARE YOU SURE?
236
00:11:48,642 --> 00:11:50,378
I MEAN, THAT WOULD
BE A PRETTY GOOD
EVIL PLAN.
237
00:11:50,411 --> 00:11:54,882
SHUT UP! OUR PLAN
IS MUCH BETTER THAN THAT.
238
00:11:54,915 --> 00:12:00,421
WE ARE HERE TO TAKE EARTH'S
ENTIRE SUPPLY OF STUFF.
239
00:12:00,454 --> 00:12:02,423
FROM TINY
LEATHER BACKPACKS
240
00:12:02,456 --> 00:12:04,425
TO SPORTS CARS
241
00:12:04,458 --> 00:12:06,226
TO FABERGE EGGS.
242
00:12:06,260 --> 00:12:09,930
ALL THOSE THINGS
YOU LIKE WILL BE OURS.
243
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:11,332
IMPRESSIVE, PRELL,
244
00:12:11,365 --> 00:12:14,268
AS IS THIS SECRET
UNDERGROUND LAIR OF YOURS.
245
00:12:14,302 --> 00:12:18,306
IT'S NOT TO MY TASTE,
BUT I CAN SEE WHERE
YOU'RE GOING WITH IT.
246
00:12:18,339 --> 00:12:20,841
HOWEVER, THE PEOPLE
OF EARTH ARE NOT AS
STUPID AS YOU THINK.
247
00:12:20,874 --> 00:12:23,477
OOH, REALLY?
248
00:12:23,511 --> 00:12:24,812
YOU WERE.
249
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:26,647
GABRIELLA?
250
00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:27,948
FOR THE LAST
30 YEARS,
251
00:12:27,981 --> 00:12:31,251
WE'VE MONITORED
EARTH BROADCAST
SIGNALS,
252
00:12:31,285 --> 00:12:33,587
AND WE KNOW
YOUR WEAKNESS.
253
00:12:33,621 --> 00:12:37,458
AND NOW WE'RE GOING
TO EXPLOIT IT WITH
THE ULTIMATE WEAPON.
254
00:12:37,491 --> 00:12:38,659
IS IT
A RAY GUN?
255
00:12:38,692 --> 00:12:39,793
OH, I BET IT'S
A GIANT MAGNET.
256
00:12:39,827 --> 00:12:42,796
DOES IT RHYME
WITH SNUCLEAR?
257
00:12:42,830 --> 00:12:45,333
OUR WEAPON IS...
258
00:12:45,366 --> 00:12:46,934
THE BEER COMMERCIAL.
259
00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:48,602
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
260
00:12:48,636 --> 00:12:51,339
WHAT?
WHAT?
WHAT?
261
00:12:51,372 --> 00:12:52,806
IT'S VERY SIMPLE,
GENTLEMEN.
262
00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:55,075
CHLOE, DARLING.
263
00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:56,844
WE HAVE NOTICED
THAT WHEN YOU EARTHMEN
264
00:12:56,877 --> 00:13:00,781
ARE BOMBARDED WITH IMAGES
OF HOPS, BARLEY, BREASTS,
AND FUN,
265
00:13:00,814 --> 00:13:03,917
YOU BECOME WEAK AND
SUSCEPTIBLE TO SUGGESTION.
266
00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:05,653
WE HAVE CREATED
A BEER COMMERCIAL
267
00:13:05,686 --> 00:13:10,891
400,000 TIMES
MORE POWERFUL
THAN EVER BEFORE,
268
00:13:10,924 --> 00:13:14,294
AND WE WILL BROADCAST
THIS 30-SECOND
MASTERPIECE DURING--
269
00:13:14,328 --> 00:13:15,729
THE SUPER BOWL?
270
00:13:15,763 --> 00:13:19,900
YES, AND THANK YOU
FOR RUINING
MY DRAMATIC MOMENT.
271
00:13:19,933 --> 00:13:22,703
EXCUSE ME, BUT WOULDN'T
IT HAVE BEEN EASIER TO
JUST BUY A COMMERCIAL?
272
00:13:22,736 --> 00:13:25,105
DURING
THE SUPER BOWL?
273
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:28,609
HAVE YOU ANY IDEA
HOW MUCH THAT COSTS?
274
00:13:30,077 --> 00:13:30,911
OH!
275
00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,012
YOU CALL THAT A HIT?
276
00:13:32,045 --> 00:13:35,015
PUT SOME SHOULDER IN IT!
277
00:13:35,048 --> 00:13:37,451
I USED TO PLAY RUGBY.
278
00:13:37,485 --> 00:13:39,152
I USED TO BE
A CHEERLEADER
IN HIGH SCHOOL,
279
00:13:39,186 --> 00:13:40,320
BUT THEY THREW ME
OFF THE SQUAD
280
00:13:40,354 --> 00:13:43,591
BECAUSE I FORGOT
TO WEAR UNDERWEAR...
281
00:13:43,624 --> 00:13:46,427
OCCASIONALLY.
282
00:13:50,297 --> 00:13:52,533
THE SATELLITE
IS IN PLACE.
283
00:13:52,566 --> 00:13:55,769
BRING FORTH
THE MASTER TAPE.
284
00:13:55,803 --> 00:13:57,805
DON'T DO IT, SALLY!
285
00:13:59,239 --> 00:14:01,274
MASTER TAPE INSERTED.
286
00:14:01,308 --> 00:14:04,945
REMEMBER
THE GOOD TIMES, SALLY.
287
00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:06,880
5 SECONDS TO AIR.
288
00:14:06,914 --> 00:14:07,948
5...
289
00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:09,550
4...
290
00:14:09,583 --> 00:14:10,651
3...
291
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:12,520
7...
2!
292
00:14:12,553 --> 00:14:13,721
2...
293
00:14:13,754 --> 00:14:15,389
1...
294
00:14:15,423 --> 00:14:18,258
I'M YOUR DADDY.
295
00:14:18,291 --> 00:14:21,662
YOU'RE MY LITTLE
SCHMOO-SCHMOO.
296
00:14:21,695 --> 00:14:27,067
AND I'M YOUR BUNNY MAN.
WHOO, I'M YOUR BUNNY!
297
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,336
COME TO PAPA, BABY.
298
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:32,305
THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S IT.
299
00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:36,376
STOP THE MASTER TAPE!
300
00:14:36,410 --> 00:14:39,046
BOY, THAT WAS
EMBARRASSING.
301
00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:40,648
PAUL MITCHELL,
302
00:14:40,681 --> 00:14:43,116
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
303
00:14:43,150 --> 00:14:45,152
THERE'S NO
PAUL MITCHELL HERE.
304
00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:47,888
MY NAME IS
SALLY SOLOMON!
305
00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:49,423
YES, SHE'S BACK!
306
00:14:49,457 --> 00:14:51,492
HOW RUDE!
307
00:14:51,525 --> 00:14:55,028
GABRIELLA, TEACH
THIS LADY SOME MANNERS.
308
00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:57,531
OH, SWEETIE, TRUST ME,
YOU DON'T WANT ANY
OF THIS, ALL RIGHT?
309
00:14:57,565 --> 00:14:59,833
OH, I WANT PLENTY
OF THAT.
310
00:14:59,867 --> 00:15:01,702
[INHALING AND EXHALING]
311
00:15:04,872 --> 00:15:05,372
UH-OH.
312
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:06,840
SHE'S GOT THE KUNG-FU!
313
00:15:06,874 --> 00:15:08,676
AAH!
314
00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:11,645
OK, NOW I'M MAD.
315
00:15:11,679 --> 00:15:13,747
AND YOU WON'T LIKE ME
WHEN I'M MAD.
316
00:15:13,781 --> 00:15:15,048
AAH!
317
00:15:16,917 --> 00:15:18,452
OH!
318
00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:29,262
I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU GOT YOUR ASS
KICKED BY A GIRL.
319
00:15:29,296 --> 00:15:33,400
WELL, YOU MAY HAVE
SUCCEEDED IN RUINING
OUR MASTER PLAN,
320
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:36,003
BUT WE'LL BE BACK.
321
00:15:36,036 --> 00:15:39,139
MEANWHILE, YOU WILL
BE TRAPPED HERE.
322
00:15:39,172 --> 00:15:41,408
BEGIN SELF-DESTRUCT
SEQUENCE.
323
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:45,412
Computer: THE CONTROL ROOM
WILL SELF-DESTRUCT
IN 4 MINUTES.
324
00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:47,715
LET ME GUESS...
WE'RE IN THE CONTROL ROOM.
325
00:15:47,748 --> 00:15:49,116
CORRECT.
326
00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:52,152
LET'S GO, LADIES.
327
00:15:56,223 --> 00:15:58,258
WELL, GUYS,
I GUESS THIS IS IT.
328
00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,060
I SUPPOSE
IT'S APPROPRIATE.
329
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,294
WE CAME TO THIS
WORLD TOGETHER,
330
00:16:01,328 --> 00:16:02,896
AND NOW WE'RE GONNA
LEAVE IT TOGETHER.
331
00:16:02,930 --> 00:16:03,664
YOU KNOW
WHAT HAPPENED?
332
00:16:03,697 --> 00:16:05,065
WE STAYED ON THIS
PLANET TOO LONG.
333
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:07,568
REMEMBER THE FIRST RULE
OF INTERGALACTIC TRAVEL.
334
00:16:07,601 --> 00:16:08,969
NEVER GET ATTACHED.
335
00:16:09,002 --> 00:16:12,405
I THOUGHT IT WAS
NEVER GET A CAT.
336
00:16:12,439 --> 00:16:15,576
BUT YOU KNOW, LOOKING
BACK ON THE LAST 2 YEARS,
337
00:16:15,609 --> 00:16:17,778
LIVING AS A HUMAN
WITH THE 3 OF YOU,
338
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:19,847
I WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING.
339
00:16:19,880 --> 00:16:24,084
Computer: THE CONTROL ROOM
WILL SELF-DESTRUCT
IN 3 MINUTES.
340
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:27,220
WELL, EXCEPT THIS LAST THING
WHERE WE BLOW UP.
341
00:16:27,254 --> 00:16:28,522
GOOD POINT.
IT SUCKS!
NO THANK YOU.
342
00:16:28,556 --> 00:16:30,924
OH LOOK AT US!
WHAT FOOLS!
343
00:16:30,958 --> 00:16:32,826
WE THOUGHT THOSE WOMEN
REALLY LOVED US!
344
00:16:32,860 --> 00:16:34,728
SUCKERS, ALL OF US.
345
00:16:35,763 --> 00:16:37,865
HARRY!
MASCHA!
346
00:16:37,898 --> 00:16:39,933
I LOVE YOU.
347
00:16:39,967 --> 00:16:42,202
SUCKERS, HUH?
348
00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:46,039
WE GOTTA STOP THAT SHIP!
349
00:16:46,073 --> 00:16:51,078
MASCHA, LET'S USE THESE LAST
PRECIOUS MOMENTS OF LIFE...
350
00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:52,445
TO MAKE OUT.
351
00:16:52,479 --> 00:16:53,647
HARRY, COME ON!
352
00:16:53,681 --> 00:16:57,484
Computer: THE CONTROL ROOM
WILL SELF-DESTRUCT
IN 2 MINUTES.
353
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:58,485
DICK, WE GOTTA GO!
354
00:16:58,518 --> 00:16:59,653
NO. WE CAN'T
LET THEM ESCAPE!
355
00:16:59,687 --> 00:17:01,889
MASCHA, HOW DO YOU CONTACT
THE TRANSPORT SHIP?
356
00:17:01,922 --> 00:17:03,691
WELL, I DON'T KNOW.
MY TRAINING
WAS IN SEDUCTION
357
00:17:03,724 --> 00:17:05,425
AND LARGE APPLIANCE
REPAIR.
358
00:17:05,458 --> 00:17:07,294
RIGHT, DICK.
SHE FIXED THE DRYER.
359
00:17:07,327 --> 00:17:08,829
YEAH, LOOK HOW GREAT
MY SHIRT CAME OUT.
360
00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:10,230
YOU STILL HAVE TO
REPLACE THE BEARINGS.
361
00:17:10,263 --> 00:17:11,064
WHAT'S THAT
GONNA RUN US?
362
00:17:11,098 --> 00:17:12,733
SHUT UP!
THE TRANSPORT SHIP
IS COMING!
363
00:17:12,766 --> 00:17:15,402
NOT FOR LONG.
STAND ASIDE!
364
00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:18,271
OH! WHAT WAS
I THINKING?
365
00:17:18,305 --> 00:17:20,207
OH, THAT SMARTS!
366
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,142
WAIT, I'VE GOT
A WRENCH.
367
00:17:22,175 --> 00:17:23,644
YOU DIDN'T MENTION
THAT BEFORE.
368
00:17:23,677 --> 00:17:27,080
WELL, I DIDN'T THINK
YOU WERE GONNA HIT IT
WITH YOUR HAND.
369
00:17:35,022 --> 00:17:38,125
Computer: THE TRANSPORT SHIP
IS NOW CAREENING
TOWARD THE SUN.
370
00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:38,792
THAT'S GOOD, ISN'T IT?
371
00:17:38,826 --> 00:17:39,559
OH, YEAH.
372
00:17:39,593 --> 00:17:41,695
All: YEAH!
373
00:17:41,729 --> 00:17:45,966
Computer: THE CONTROL ROOM
WILL SELF-DESTRUCT
IN ONE MINUTE.
374
00:17:45,999 --> 00:17:49,970
All: LET'S GO!
[Screaming]
375
00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:56,576
Dick: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
376
00:17:56,610 --> 00:17:57,845
THE BIG WOMEN ARE ANGRY!
377
00:17:57,878 --> 00:18:01,081
SAVE YOURSELF
WHILE YOU STILL CAN!
378
00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:06,086
BOY, I MUST BE BUZZED 'CAUSE
I THOUGHT THAT WAS DICK.
379
00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:08,421
YEAH, ME, TOO.
380
00:18:09,957 --> 00:18:13,761
HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU
HOW ATTRACTIVE
I FIND YOU?
381
00:18:13,794 --> 00:18:15,595
NO.
382
00:18:15,629 --> 00:18:18,866
AND I HOPE YOU NEVER DO.
383
00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:27,775
ALL IS LOST!
384
00:18:27,808 --> 00:18:30,043
THE TRANSPORTER'S
DESTROYED.
385
00:18:30,077 --> 00:18:32,145
WE'RE STRANDED.
386
00:18:32,179 --> 00:18:34,882
THAT'S RIGHT.
SQUIRT YOUR TEARS.
YOU LOSE.
387
00:18:34,915 --> 00:18:36,917
HA HA.
388
00:18:36,950 --> 00:18:41,154
NOW WE'RE STUCK FOREVER
ON THIS TRUCK STOP
OF A PLANET.
389
00:18:41,188 --> 00:18:43,323
NOW, DON'T CRY.
IT'S A GOOD PLACE.
390
00:18:43,356 --> 00:18:44,591
YOU'LL MAKE
FRIENDS HERE.
391
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:45,826
BELIEVE ME,
IT'S NOT SO BAD.
392
00:18:45,859 --> 00:18:48,762
OF ALL THE PLANETS
IN THE GALAXY,
IT'S ONE OF THE NICEST.
393
00:18:48,796 --> 00:18:49,963
HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?
394
00:18:49,997 --> 00:18:54,301
WELL, IT'S JUST A HUNCH.
395
00:18:54,334 --> 00:18:55,836
WHAT WILL WE DO
HERE ON EARTH?
396
00:18:55,869 --> 00:18:57,637
WE HAVE NO SKILLS.
397
00:18:57,671 --> 00:18:59,106
EXCEPT FOR EVIL MANIPULATION.
398
00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:02,743
AND THAT'S NOT A CAREER.
399
00:19:02,776 --> 00:19:04,077
NO ONE NEEDS US.
400
00:19:04,111 --> 00:19:06,613
HAS TELEVISION
TAUGHT YOU NOTHING?
401
00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:08,481
YOU'VE SEEN
OUR ADVERTISEMENTS.
402
00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:12,519
WOMEN LIKE YOU ARE
OUR UNATTAINABLE STANDARD.
403
00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:14,688
EVERY PRODUCT YOU USE...
404
00:19:14,722 --> 00:19:16,790
EVERY TREND
YOU EMBRACE...
405
00:19:16,824 --> 00:19:19,292
BECOMES OUR OBSESSION.
406
00:19:19,326 --> 00:19:22,229
YOU ARE THE SHAPELY
AND ELUSIVE CARROT
407
00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:26,099
THAT OUR HOMELY OLD HORSES
WILL CHASE FOR ETERNITY,
408
00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:28,201
OUR INSECURITIES
SPURRING US ON,
409
00:19:28,235 --> 00:19:31,571
DEMANDING THAT WE
SPEND, SPEND, SPEND!
410
00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,106
NO ONE NEEDS YOU?
411
00:19:33,140 --> 00:19:36,509
OUR GLOBAL ECONOMY
DEPENDS ON YOU.
412
00:19:36,543 --> 00:19:37,644
Women: WOW!
413
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:38,912
SO, STAY...
414
00:19:38,946 --> 00:19:42,115
STAY WHERE
YOU ARE NEEDED.
415
00:19:42,149 --> 00:19:43,616
AND WHERE
YOU ARE NEEDED...
416
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:45,518
WE GET IT!
WE GET IT!
417
00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:48,355
Announcer: WELCOME
TO OCEAN WORLD, SAN DIEGO,
418
00:19:48,388 --> 00:19:50,657
HOME OF BIG WALLY
AND LITTLE WALLY.
419
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,860
WELL, THAT WAS
PRETTY GOOD.
420
00:19:52,893 --> 00:19:53,560
YEAH.
421
00:19:53,593 --> 00:19:54,627
...AS THIS HAPPY DUO
AMAZES YOU
422
00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:56,730
WITH THEIR
AQUATIC AGILITY.
423
00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:02,269
Announcer: KER-SPLASH!
HA HA HA!
424
00:20:04,938 --> 00:20:08,341
NINA, YOU KNOW
WHAT'S REALLY SAD?
425
00:20:08,375 --> 00:20:10,077
WHAT?
426
00:20:10,110 --> 00:20:12,545
I WANTED TO DROWN
JUST NOW.
427
00:20:12,579 --> 00:20:15,282
ME, TOO.
428
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,388
YOU KNOW, I WONDER
IF I SHOULD HAVE
GONE TO PARIS
429
00:20:21,421 --> 00:20:23,423
WITH CHLOE
AND GABRIELLA.
430
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:25,625
YEAH, I'M BEGINNING
TO THINK I SHOULD
HAVE GONE, TOO.
431
00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,394
YEAH, RIGHT.
432
00:20:27,427 --> 00:20:30,097
I'M GOING TO GO PUT ON
SOME MORE MAKEUP.
433
00:20:30,130 --> 00:20:31,364
YOU KNOW, WHEN
I WAS ON THE ROAD,
434
00:20:31,398 --> 00:20:32,900
I WAS OFFERED A JOB
REPAIRING DRYERS
435
00:20:32,933 --> 00:20:36,303
FOR THE SECOND LARGEST
LAUNDROMAT IN TUCSON.
436
00:20:36,336 --> 00:20:37,604
YOU WERE?
437
00:20:37,637 --> 00:20:39,973
BUT I TURNED IT DOWN.
438
00:20:40,007 --> 00:20:42,776
I COULDN'T LEAVE YOU.
439
00:20:44,044 --> 00:20:46,847
MASCHA, YOU GOTTA
TAKE IT.
440
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:49,449
I COULD NEVER
LIVE WITH MYSELF
IF I HELD YOU BACK.
441
00:20:49,482 --> 00:20:50,851
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
442
00:20:50,884 --> 00:20:54,054
A GIRL LIKE YOU
COULD NEVER BE HAPPY
IN RUTHERFORD.
443
00:20:54,087 --> 00:20:57,190
IF YOU DIDN'T TAKE
IT, YOU'D REGRET IT.
444
00:20:57,224 --> 00:21:02,629
MAYBE NOT TODAY,
MAYBE NOT TOMORROW,
MAYBE NOT EVER.
445
00:21:03,730 --> 00:21:05,732
BUT YOU'LL
REGRET IT.
446
00:21:05,765 --> 00:21:08,802
WELL, IF THIS IS GOING
TO BE MY LAST NIGHT HERE,
447
00:21:08,836 --> 00:21:11,304
CAN WE
SPEND IT TOGETHER
448
00:21:11,338 --> 00:21:13,841
STARING UP
AT THE STARS?
449
00:21:13,874 --> 00:21:27,020
SURE.
450
00:21:27,054 --> 00:21:28,521
OW!
451
00:21:28,555 --> 00:21:30,223
HELLO, MARY,
HOW WAS YOUR TRIP?
452
00:21:30,257 --> 00:21:32,425
AWFUL. WE DIDN'T EVEN
MAKE IT TO THE SUPER BOWL.
453
00:21:32,459 --> 00:21:35,528
WELL, YOU PROBABLY
HAD A BETTER TIME AT
OCEAN WORLD ANYWAY.
454
00:21:35,562 --> 00:21:37,730
HOW DO YOU KNOW
WE WENT TO OCEAN WORLD?
455
00:21:37,764 --> 00:21:40,400
WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU
DO IF YOUR TICKETS
GOT STOLEN?
456
00:21:40,433 --> 00:21:42,435
WE NEVER MENTIONED
OUR TICKETS WERE STOLEN.
457
00:21:42,469 --> 00:21:44,972
WHATEVER HAPPENED,
YOU'RE PROBABLY
BETTER OFF
458
00:21:45,005 --> 00:21:46,739
NOT HAVING GONE
TO THAT GAME.
459
00:21:46,773 --> 00:21:48,175
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
460
00:21:48,208 --> 00:21:50,610
WELL, THE SODAS
WERE 4.95.
461
00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:53,413
AND THE HOT DOGS--
462
00:21:53,446 --> 00:21:54,447
AAH!
31062
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