All language subtitles for Your Pretty Face is Going to Hell S03E08 Golden Fiddle Week 1080p Amazon WEB-DL Dng]

Did I ever tell you guys
about the time

I went down to Georgia
looking for a soul to steal?

- Yes.
- Many times.

- Yep.
- Okay, well,

it's Golden Fiddle Week,
gentlemen.

Sign one out with Bob.

You know the drill.

Find somebody topside

and bet them a golden fiddle
for their soul.

Just make sure you can win.

I don't know how
to play a damn fiddle.

You don't need to be able
to play a fiddle.

Just challenge them
to something your good at,

like William here is
a world-class opera singer.

♪ Thank yo-o-o-o-o-o-o-u

That was good.

I can't believe
he murdered his family.

Yeah.

Scoot over, you dirty roofers,

'cause I'm the best
that's ever been at roofing.

And I'll bet you
a fiddle of gold

against your soul that
I'm better than you at tennis.

I'm the best that's ever
been at tequila drinking.

Benji: I bet I can
make love to your son,

and I'm the best
that's ever been.

I'll beat your ass
at bar trivia!

I would beg to differ.

Well, I'm good, but I'm not,
like, a pro or nothing.

You just said you're
the best that's ever been.

Bottom line, can I
make love to your son?

Just one game.
Come on, man!

I'm calling the police.

Get out of here!
But I'm the best
that's ever been!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God, am I safe?
Am I safe?

Ay-yi-yi, cabron.

I bet three dudes
that I could beat them

at nailing shingles to a roof,
and I crushed their asses

because I'm
the best there's ever been.

They weren't even
working very hard.

They nailed in
a couple of shingles

and then they all, whole team
said that their back hurts.

Where's their souls?

Oh.

They left before
I could do that.

Yeah, and then
they moved the ladder

and they put it in the van
and they drove away.

I had to shimmy
down a drain pipe,

and I got stuck in a bush.

So you basically shingled
that roof for free.

And I'm the best at it.

Yep, it said on their business
card that they were the best.

As a matter of fact,
they were not the best.

So I'm the best
there's ever been.

Where's your fiddle, Gar?

Oh, I got it right here.
Mm-hmm.

Where's my fiddle?

I want all those fiddles back
by the end of the week.

Do you understand me?
Yes.

Otherwise, I'm gonna find them

and I'm gonna re-string
those veins in your dick,

you little shit.
I'm not around.

I need those fiddles back.

They're made of solid gold!

Oh, oh, oh!

Troy!
Have you seen my fiddle?

Oh, where's the fiddle?!
Where's the fiddle?!

Where's the fiddle?!
Troy, you seen my fiddle?

Where's my fiddle? I need...
I'm looking for my fiddle.

Where is it?
I don't know.

Where did you put your fiddle?

There's my fiddle.

No, no, that's my fiddle.

That's my fiddle!
No, you stay back.

That's my fiddle!
It's got roofing tar

all over it, all right?

You diddled my fiddle!
Shh! All right, fine, fine!

I just need to
borrow it for tonight,

and then I'll
give it back tomorrow!

What are you thinking about?!

You reek of booze.

Did you lose your fiddle?

You've been here
all Golden Fiddle Week

at Burglar's Cove
getting slammered?

You! Toad!

I got another
golden fiddle for your soul,

and this time,
I brought a trivia expert.

No.
Oh.

By night's end, I'm gonna be
fiddling while Troy burns.

That's a reference to Nero
and Rome, 64 A.D.

But if I'm wagering my soul,
you should wager yours, too.

Done.
No!

Both of ours
and the golden fiddle

in exchange for the fiddle
you won for me last week.

I will end you.

"Good Will Hunting."
Best Screenplay, what year?

'95.

'97.

This is gonna be
a piece of cake.

Sarah, I'll take 30 hot wings

and a diet soda delivered
to my table post haste.

You can take your tip
out of my bar bucks

from last week's winnings
when I took him down.

Well, I got a real ringer here.

He knows everything
about pop culture and Canada

and dead celebrities.

I've been in hell
for the last 10 years.

The only dead celebrities I know

are Jeffrey Dahmer
and Adolf Hitler.

I'm the best that's
ever been at bar trivia.

Yeah, you're the best
that's ever been, all right.

The best that's ever been
at passing out

drinking Jello shots
while I have to sit there

listing Kenny Rogers hits.

I only know "The Gambler."
I wrote it five times.

They must think I'm autistic.

Shh! Grab two souls.

Toad ain't gonna
know the difference!

No, no, no, what are you doing?

Shh.

Hi.

The you two doing
in my soul closet?

It's a really funny story.

Troy's an alcoholic,
and he lost both of our souls

and our fiddles
in a bar trivia contest,

so no, Troy,
it's not a funny story.

♪ GoldenFiddles, ♪Souls,
♪SuckltSatan.

Is this the guy?
We're trending?

These golden fiddles are
recruitment tools, they're bait.

You are not to lose them
in a bet.

You lost to Charlie Daniels.

He wears a vest without a shirt.

He's got a five-pound
Confederate flag belt buckle.

And that's his proudest thing,
and he has kids.

Come with me.

We're gonna get raped.

Gentlemen, behold.

Oh.
This is some kind of tree?

It's the tree of knowledge,
you dumb shit.

- Oh!
- Ah!

Let's go, pick it up.
Gobble up this fruit, all right?

It's chock full
of useless information.

Come on.
Eat it up.

You put it in your mouth,
up your ass, I don't care.

Either way.
Claude, Dizzay, come here.

You got to help these two
idiots win a trivia contest.

- Come on.
- Oh, man, I got to eat

this moldy fruit
because of your dumb asses?

Get in there. Get some of this.
Come on, it tastes good.

Drop it, it's not ripe.

Keep it in, Gary.
Swallow the seeds, too.

All of it.

Pete Best was the fifth Beatle.

There we go.

And The Beatles used to be
called the Quarrymen.

Is that true?

"The Simpsons" is
the longest-running

scripted television show,
but I already knew that.

Nice. Work it! Work it!
Keep going!

You're not the real Satan.

What? Come here.
Come here, you son of a...

I want my fiddles back!
Do you understand?

Toad, Eater of Worlds:
Ah, back for more, huh?

And I see you brought
reinforcements.

Isn't that right, Dimples?

I'm referencing the question
you got wrong last week.

I know. A golf ball on average
has 336 dimples.

But you're a week too late.

And by the end of this match,
I want two more fiddles,

two more souls,
and I expect to be crowned

supreme ruler of the underworld.

Well, sorry,
but we don't have the authority

to give you any of that.

It's a deal.

You're about to learn what
my ass tastes like, Toad.

Ugh.

I think The Dimples
is a great team name.

No, no, no, no, man.
That name sucks.

We need something like a play on
the tree of knowledge, like...

The Fruity Boys.

- No.
- Big Danglin' Fruits.

No!
The Stinky Banana Buddies.

What are you talking about?

A bunch of grapes.
Tiny "g," big "R."

Rapes.
Big Rapes.

I already turned our name in.

Our team name is Funilingus.

Funilingus?

Oh, come on, man.
Yeah, yeah.

'Cause we're here to have fun,
but if we happen to...

that wouldn't be bad, either.

All right, everybody,
welcome to Tuesday trivia.

We're so happy most of you
are back with us again.

- Oh, not this again.
- This is the only way

we're gonna beat this bastard.
- God.

Trivia Host: Our first
category is music.

What is the top-selling
album of all time?

Michael Jackson.
- Michael Jackson, "Thriller."

Michael Jackson's "Thriller"!

-Oh, yeah.

-Hee-hee!

What figure appears
in the background

of every "Seinfeld" episode?

- Superman.
- Superman.

- Superman.
- Whoo!

The musical "Cats" is based on
a book of poetry by what author?

- T.S. Eliot.
- T.S. Eliot.

T.S. Eliot. What is
the world's largest island?

- Greenland.
- Greenland!

Greenland.
Just an update on our scores.

Tied at the top,
we have Funilingus

and Todd, Eater of the Worlds.

Which Elton John album
was the first album...

"Captain Fantastic
and the Brown Dirt Cowboy."

- Great job, guys.
- Yeah, dawg.

How tall is is Big Bird...
You have to wait.

The... The answer should be...
8'2" is correct.

We're doing it, guys.
We're freaking doing it.

All right, it's time for
our final trivia question

for all the marbles
and $100 in bar bucks.

Category is The Bible.

The question is,
in the book of Thessalonians,

what city did Satan
stop Paul from traveling to?

-I don't know.

I have no idea.
I don't even know what he said.

I've only read The Torah.

Wait, wait, whoa, whoa.

Todd's not writing
anything down.

Come on, we have to get this.

We got to eat more fruit, man.
It's in the fruit.

- There's no more fruit.
- How did we eat

all the fruit already?

I'm phoning a friend.

My ear hurts. I better rub it
with my knuckle like this.

No, asshole.

No.

He's not picking up the phone.
He must be busy.

Just use my phone.
He'll answer immediately.

Ew, your hands are hot.

Thank you for handing me
that piece of gum, Claude.

My man.

Hey, hey, hey, where did you
stop Paul from going to?

This is Gary, isn't it?
Using Claude's phone?

It's me,
Claude. Shalom.

Yeah.
All right,

this is Gary, okay?

Okay, I got to go.

No, no, no!
See you, Gar.

I got to go.
Where did you stop

Paul from going to?

Is your jaw locking up?

Told you those spikes
would give you tetanus.

Okay, yeah. Where did you
stop Paul from going to?

Paul from The Bible.

Paul

I don't know who that is man.
What are we doing?

Where did you stop Paul?

Paul.

Paul?
Paul.

Paul who?
Paul Simon?

No, not Paul Simon.
Who are you, Lorne Michaels?

Paul McCartney?

No, who did you stop Paul
from going to?

I don't... I don't know.

Paul

Paul from The Bible.

Where did you stop Paul
from The Bible from going to?

The apostle Paul.

Yeah! The... Yes, yes.
The apostle Paul.

This is in,
uh, Thessalonians, right?

Hurry, come on.

The song is about to end.

I need you
to give me the answer.

Yes.
Where did you stop Paul...

Thessalonica.
Thessalonica.

Yes, it is a very
funny story, actually.

Hello?

Thessalonica.

Funilingus back on top.

I just turned in Bethlehem.

Trivia Host: All answers are in,
and the final answer

to the question is...

Thessalonica!

Thessalonica.

Ha! Whoo!
I got it.

Did

Oh, we got it.
Verbally.

But it had to be written down,

and your teammate
clearly wrote... "Belteam."

Do you want me to go buck wild
and rip up this place?

So, you got all of
our golden fiddles back?

Yeah. In a way, yeah.
Absolutely.

What do you mean
"in a way?"

Ah, is he the workman?
I want a display case built

right here, big enough
for all four

of my golden fiddles
and four souls.

Who is this?

I will see
your face turn alabaster

when you find
the servant is the master.

"Wrapped Around Your Finger,"
The Police, 1983...

Todd, Eater of Worlds.

His name's Todd Stodski.
Mm-hmm.

Ooh, actually,
while you're at it,

could you get rid of this,
'cause my name's Todd.

Not Satan.