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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,102 --> 00:00:02,670 I don't get what your problem is. 2 00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:04,338 Mom, you're not serious, are you? 3 00:00:04,372 --> 00:00:06,507 Mom, you still have to take me to Chloe's house on Saturday. 4 00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:08,142 Mom, this is child abandonment. 5 00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:10,678 We're like orphans now! (door slams) 6 00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:16,284 FXX presents You're the Worst. 7 00:00:26,127 --> 00:00:28,396 Everything bagel and cream cheese, black coffee. 8 00:00:30,631 --> 00:00:34,368 * Are you my love? Hey. 9 00:00:34,402 --> 00:00:36,570 * Are you my love? 10 00:00:36,604 --> 00:00:39,707 * Are you the one that I've been thinking of? * 11 00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:42,343 * Are you my love? 12 00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:45,413 * I've been holding the door 13 00:00:45,446 --> 00:00:47,948 * I've been holding the door * 14 00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:51,419 * Are you the one that I've been waiting for? * 15 00:00:51,452 --> 00:00:54,388 * I've been holding the door 16 00:00:54,422 --> 00:00:56,390 * Lightning struck 17 00:00:56,424 --> 00:01:00,060 * Electricity rained 18 00:01:00,094 --> 00:01:02,062 * How my lips stung 19 00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:05,699 * Whispering your name 20 00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:11,872 * Tell me, baby, true 21 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:14,108 * I've been holding the door 22 00:01:14,142 --> 00:01:15,776 * I've been holding the door * 23 00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:17,411 Aw, hey, dog. 24 00:01:17,445 --> 00:01:20,648 * Are you the one that I've been waiting for? * 25 00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:24,051 * I've been holding the door 26 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,586 * Are you my love? 27 00:01:25,619 --> 00:01:29,223 * Are you my love? Bup! 28 00:01:29,257 --> 00:01:32,092 * Are you the one that I've been dreaming of? * 29 00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:35,329 * Are you my love? 30 00:01:35,363 --> 00:01:38,599 (coughing) Jesus. 31 00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,634 (Г  la Dolores O'Riordan): * With their tanks 32 00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:42,436 * And their bombs, and their bombs * 33 00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:44,505 * And their guns, in your head 34 00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:47,475 * In your head you're crying 35 00:01:47,508 --> 00:01:51,345 * In their head, in your head * 36 00:01:51,379 --> 00:01:53,414 * Zombie, zombie 37 00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:56,284 * Zombie-ie-ie-ie. 38 00:01:56,317 --> 00:02:00,120 Linds, I discovered this awesome radio station! 39 00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:03,157 Jack FM-- it is not your father's rock station. 40 00:02:03,191 --> 00:02:06,360 You see, Jack just plays whatever he wants. 41 00:02:06,394 --> 00:02:08,596 They have this great '90s block 42 00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,664 I've gotten really into. 43 00:02:10,698 --> 00:02:13,667 What a great decade for music. 44 00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:17,271 We were so lucky! 45 00:02:17,305 --> 00:02:19,006 (toilet flushes) Anyway... 46 00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:20,508 How was your day? 47 00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:21,609 So good. 48 00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:23,277 I love my job. 49 00:02:23,311 --> 00:02:25,045 That's so great. 50 00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:26,947 Watch me. 51 00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,383 It's like having people expect you to be somewhere 52 00:02:29,417 --> 00:02:31,619 actually makes you want to go there. 53 00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,354 Plus, I get money. 54 00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:34,822 Awesome. 55 00:02:34,855 --> 00:02:38,892 Look, I put beads in my hair. Hmm. 56 00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:40,861 You should use it at work. 57 00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:42,296 "Teenage white girl on vacation" 58 00:02:42,330 --> 00:02:43,797 is gonna be huge this year. 59 00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:47,000 I'm finally contributing to society. 60 00:02:47,034 --> 00:02:48,836 By being a stylist's assistant? 61 00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:50,671 Helping make people less ugly? 62 00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:53,674 It's God's work, Gretch. 63 00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,042 This is the tits! 64 00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:57,478 I'm playing with clothes during the day, and then 65 00:02:57,511 --> 00:03:00,214 I come home, and you're here, and Paul isn't. 66 00:03:00,248 --> 00:03:03,150 I love my new life. 67 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:07,421 Yeah, but... I don't know. 68 00:03:07,455 --> 00:03:10,157 What? I love it, too. 69 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:13,327 But... we're doing the same thing every night. 70 00:03:13,361 --> 00:03:15,596 You know, drinking, smoking weed. 71 00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:18,031 I'm afraid we might be in a rut. 72 00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:22,370 Okay, well, we can go out in the hood. 73 00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:24,171 Get Korean barbecue, and then go to one 74 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:27,040 of those karaoke places where they don't like white people. 75 00:03:27,074 --> 00:03:28,509 I have a better idea. 76 00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:29,943 Why don't we stay here and smoke crack? 77 00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:34,181 Where did you get crack? 78 00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:35,949 From one of the homeless people outside. 79 00:03:35,983 --> 00:03:37,685 I didn't even have to leave the apartment. 80 00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:38,886 He just came to the window and asked 81 00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:41,188 if I wanted to buy some crack, and I said yes! 82 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,891 Ten dollars for all that crack. Can you believe it? 83 00:03:43,924 --> 00:03:46,794 Maybe smoking crack isn't the best idea. 84 00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:49,763 The guy who sold it to me couldn't disagree more. 85 00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:58,839 * 86 00:04:01,775 --> 00:04:04,578 * I'm gonna leave you anyway 87 00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:07,315 * I'm gonna leave you anyway * 88 00:04:07,348 --> 00:04:10,651 * Gonna leave you anyway. 89 00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:17,625 WOMAN: Lindsay, did you get those swatches from Antwerp? 90 00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:21,395 Hello? Lindsay? 91 00:04:21,429 --> 00:04:24,998 Can I see you in my office? 92 00:04:27,935 --> 00:04:29,269 Lindsay, I wanted to... 93 00:04:29,303 --> 00:04:30,804 I smoked crack. What? 94 00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,675 Thank you for this opportunity. 95 00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:36,243 I'm sorry I let you down. 96 00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:37,445 Lindsay, sit. 97 00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:40,581 You've been here on a trial basis 98 00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:42,983 for over a month now. 99 00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:44,685 Are you enjoying yourself? 100 00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:46,754 So much. 101 00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:49,256 It's the dream I didn't know I had. 102 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,359 I feel like I found a family here. 103 00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:53,293 Plus, the free food is a nice perk. 104 00:04:53,327 --> 00:04:54,628 We don't have free food. 105 00:04:54,662 --> 00:04:56,997 Anyway, how would you like to come work 106 00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,265 for me full-time? 107 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,535 What?! Yes! 108 00:05:01,569 --> 00:05:04,271 I mean, I might be amenable to that. 109 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,874 Do you have a piece of paper on which I should write 110 00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:08,542 my opening salary offer? 111 00:05:08,576 --> 00:05:11,178 (laughs) 112 00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:12,513 You're funny. 113 00:05:12,546 --> 00:05:14,147 You have got a great eye, 114 00:05:14,181 --> 00:05:17,217 and you're the most positive person we've ever had. 115 00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:19,587 I really value you, Lindsay. 116 00:05:21,021 --> 00:05:24,291 Okay, well, you'll start at a base of $45K, 117 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,727 plus commission on any new clients 118 00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,696 you bring in. 119 00:05:28,729 --> 00:05:30,698 Now that you're out of your probationary period, 120 00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:32,366 the real work begins. 121 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:34,568 You don't have to do any more of those dummy chores. 122 00:05:34,602 --> 00:05:36,269 Carl can do all that crap. 123 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:43,544 I want you to start thinking like a designer. 124 00:05:43,577 --> 00:05:45,312 Read these. 125 00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:46,880 They're a good start for understanding 126 00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:49,550 my style, philosophy and influences, 127 00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:53,020 and probably the origins of my body dysmorphia. 128 00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:55,088 Why I eat ice for lunch. 129 00:05:55,122 --> 00:05:57,057 (nervous laugh) 130 00:05:57,090 --> 00:06:00,093 Then come back tonight at 7:00, and we begin. 131 00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,529 Tonight? 132 00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,865 But... work is for day. 133 00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:07,401 Honey, making people look good 134 00:06:07,435 --> 00:06:09,236 is a 24-hour job. 135 00:06:09,269 --> 00:06:13,373 We have to dress an actor for Jaden Smith's retirement party. 136 00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,577 Sorry. 137 00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:17,945 Thanks, Priscilla. 138 00:06:17,978 --> 00:06:20,047 (Lindsay sighs) 139 00:06:29,256 --> 00:06:31,291 Shove it up your ass, Carl. 140 00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:33,927 Okay. 141 00:06:40,634 --> 00:06:41,735 Hi. Hi. Hello. 142 00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:43,571 How was work? I had a great day. 143 00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:46,540 The Price Is Right had Plinko, which they never do. 144 00:06:46,574 --> 00:06:49,109 I made a chocolate mug cake. 145 00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:53,413 Also, I started a really cool dinosaur mural on your wall. 146 00:06:55,115 --> 00:06:56,550 Anyway, 147 00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:59,286 tonight I made a pitcher of greyhounds 148 00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:01,889 with that bag of grapefruits that you thought were limes. 149 00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,291 Postmates is bringing us Taco Bell as we speak. 150 00:07:04,324 --> 00:07:05,593 I think I have a little crack left. 151 00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:06,594 (laughs) 152 00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:07,761 I can't hang out tonight. 153 00:07:07,795 --> 00:07:09,797 I have to be back at work at 7:00. 154 00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:11,264 But work is for day. 155 00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:12,933 That's what I said. 156 00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:14,502 Oh, well, at least until then, 157 00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:15,836 we can get down with our chalupas 158 00:07:15,869 --> 00:07:16,904 and watch Fixer Upper. 159 00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:18,238 We drink every time Joanna says, 160 00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,674 "Shiplap!" That Chip can get it, huh? 161 00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:23,176 He can get it all the way, I think. 162 00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:25,178 Actually, I have a whole bunch of reading to do. 163 00:07:25,212 --> 00:07:26,413 Oh, ha-ha. "I should really 164 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:27,681 "get started on those sit-ups 165 00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:29,783 if I want to finish in time to catch the news." 166 00:07:29,817 --> 00:07:31,451 Actually, I really need to concentrate, 167 00:07:31,485 --> 00:07:34,287 so maybe you could clear out for, like, an hour or two? 168 00:07:39,627 --> 00:07:41,194 Are you okay? 169 00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:43,030 Yeah, no, it's just, um, 170 00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:46,199 I'm not really going outside these days. 171 00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:47,200 What do you mean? 172 00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:49,336 I haven't left your apartment. 173 00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:51,438 Since when? Um... 174 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:54,207 three months, two days, give or take. 175 00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:55,709 What?! 176 00:07:55,743 --> 00:07:57,945 You mean you haven't even left while I'm at work? 177 00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,847 But the other day I came home for lunch 178 00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:02,215 and jerked it for 45 minutes. 179 00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:05,052 I was hiding under the bed. 180 00:08:05,085 --> 00:08:06,820 Oh. 181 00:08:06,854 --> 00:08:08,522 Oh... 182 00:08:08,556 --> 00:08:11,058 So, I take it you're not 183 00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:12,059 going to therapy? 184 00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:13,393 Wrong! 185 00:08:13,426 --> 00:08:15,062 I Skype with that titty-sucking bitch 186 00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:16,564 every week. 187 00:08:16,597 --> 00:08:19,667 I am still taking my meds and 188 00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:22,335 holding down my job, so she's happy. 189 00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:23,537 Dummy. 190 00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:24,972 Are you holding down your job? 191 00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,374 I'm paying randos to take care 192 00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:30,043 of my bullshit clients, and I told the boys I'm in Europe 193 00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:31,311 scouting new talent and 194 00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,981 making connect... Shit, shit! 195 00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,449 I'm late for my Skype with them. 196 00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:41,254 Oh. 197 00:08:42,723 --> 00:08:44,424 Oh, bonjour. 198 00:08:44,457 --> 00:08:46,226 Oh, you're in France now. 199 00:08:46,259 --> 00:08:47,695 God, I love Paris. 200 00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:48,829 Did you go to the Louvre? 201 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:49,863 Oh, no, it's closed. 202 00:08:49,897 --> 00:08:51,498 They're cleaning the rugs. 203 00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:52,833 Uh, where's Honey Nutz? 204 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:53,934 He couldn't make it. 205 00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:55,368 He said he had a colonoscopy. 206 00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:56,369 Isn't he young for that? 207 00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:57,605 Well, he said it's never 208 00:08:57,638 --> 00:08:58,772 too early to start, but come on, 209 00:08:58,806 --> 00:09:00,173 we all know the truth, right? 210 00:09:00,207 --> 00:09:02,342 Zachary craves any kind of human touch. 211 00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,444 Anyway, bitch, what opportunities 212 00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:05,846 have you gotten for us? 213 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,347 You've been gone forever. 214 00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:09,016 I am laying important groundwork. 215 00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:11,184 I'm talking you up to all the music press, 216 00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,786 the influential bloggers. 217 00:09:12,820 --> 00:09:15,055 Uh, pardonnez-moi, uh,ashtray, 218 00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:16,089 s'il vous plaГ®t. 219 00:09:16,123 --> 00:09:17,090 Merci. 220 00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:18,458 It's just that you've been gone 221 00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,360 for a long time, and we actually have press needs here. 222 00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,362 I tweet-threatened Connie Chung yesterday, 223 00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,798 and not a peep, Gretchen, not one peep. 224 00:09:24,832 --> 00:09:27,768 Guys, there is a surging hunger 225 00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:29,903 for American hip-hop in Europe right now. 226 00:09:29,937 --> 00:09:31,639 You know, because of Brexit. 227 00:09:31,672 --> 00:09:32,773 You can't deny that. 228 00:09:32,806 --> 00:09:34,207 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 229 00:09:34,241 --> 00:09:35,475 That makes sense. Anyway, 230 00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:38,111 I'm going to Hot Mix 97.8 tonight. 231 00:09:38,145 --> 00:09:40,748 They are playing you on their Magnifique Mash-up Hour. 232 00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:42,482 Make sure they play "Titty Tag." 233 00:09:42,515 --> 00:09:44,584 Or "Pussy on Swoll." Mm-hmm. 234 00:09:44,618 --> 00:09:46,787 Uh, voulez voulez. 235 00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:48,555 Merci. (forced laugh) 236 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,658 Stupide. (chuckles) I have to go. 237 00:09:50,691 --> 00:09:53,160 Ciao. Also, make sure you... 238 00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:55,963 Girl. Right? 239 00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:59,299 No, I meant girl... 240 00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:02,402 You have got to leave the apartment. 241 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:05,973 Sweetie, just go outside for an hour. 242 00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:07,474 You're listening to poor-people radio. 243 00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:09,576 You have the bush of an old Italian man. 244 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:10,811 You're doing crack. 245 00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:13,947 But isn't it kind of awesome, though, 246 00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:16,850 that I came straight here after Jimmy left me on that hill, 247 00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:17,851 and haven't left? 248 00:10:17,885 --> 00:10:18,919 Like, that is pretty much 249 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,554 straight baller when you think about it. 250 00:10:23,323 --> 00:10:26,259 What if I run into him and then I die? 251 00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,628 I'm trying to stalk him online, 252 00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:30,130 but that idiot hasn't updated anything. 253 00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:32,465 Have you figured out why he left yet? 254 00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:35,302 Why he asked me to be his wife and then drove away? 255 00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:38,338 Best I can figure, he was paid by one of my enemies. 256 00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:42,442 It was just a long con to prank me by someone who I did wrong. 257 00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:44,344 Probably Jason Mraz for when I called him 258 00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:46,279 a fedora-wearing diarrhea. 259 00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:49,182 Do you believe Edgar that he hasn't heard from Jimmy? 260 00:10:49,216 --> 00:10:51,852 Oh, no. Edgar is obviously covering for him. 261 00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:53,687 Really? That fink. 262 00:10:53,721 --> 00:10:56,223 Well, no one lies to me. 263 00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:57,657 Hey, do you know where those Eskimo Pies are 264 00:10:57,691 --> 00:10:59,326 that I put in the freezer? 265 00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:01,161 Oh, I forgot to tell you, the police came for them. 266 00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:02,696 Weird. 267 00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:03,997 Oh, well. 268 00:11:05,598 --> 00:11:07,768 * 269 00:11:14,908 --> 00:11:16,243 (knocks on door) 270 00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:17,577 Come in! 271 00:11:19,847 --> 00:11:22,149 Lindsay. What are you doing? 272 00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:23,817 I'm just trying to come up with some pitch ideas 273 00:11:23,851 --> 00:11:25,085 for the show I'm working on, 274 00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:26,386 Doug Loves Sketches. 275 00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:28,188 It's about sketches. Doug loves 'em. 276 00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,890 I know, I watched season one. 277 00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:31,558 I loved "Guido Baby." (gasps) 278 00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:33,894 "Guido Baby" was mine. 279 00:11:33,927 --> 00:11:35,162 You could totally tell! 280 00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,563 BOTH: "Wah! 281 00:11:36,596 --> 00:11:37,697 Oh!" 282 00:11:37,731 --> 00:11:39,399 Jimmy! 283 00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:41,168 Jimmy, I'm coming down! 284 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:43,170 What are you doing? I know he's here. 285 00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,404 He's really not. Please. 286 00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,106 I could read people like a deck of cards, 287 00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,041 and you're holding the "Q" of clovers. 288 00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:50,343 Give him up, chico! Where is he? 289 00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:52,112 He's not here. He never came back, okay? 290 00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,548 Do you know how hard that was for me? 291 00:11:55,582 --> 00:11:57,084 At first, I drove around looking for him, 292 00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:59,352 from bar to bar, every night. 293 00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,421 Showing photos, asking around. 294 00:12:01,454 --> 00:12:03,423 I even started a hotline. 295 00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:06,860 Tips came in, but they never led anywhere. 296 00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:08,762 Now I just... 297 00:12:08,796 --> 00:12:11,531 keep a light on for him and... 298 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,266 I leave him messages every once and awhile 299 00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:15,202 just to hear his voice. (music ends) 300 00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:16,937 But life goes on. It must. 301 00:12:16,970 --> 00:12:18,405 Ha! 302 00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:20,941 That's too many details. 303 00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:22,542 Look. 304 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,144 I redecorated. 305 00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:28,181 Would I dare do that if Jimmy was still here? 306 00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:30,984 He'd kill you. 307 00:12:31,018 --> 00:12:32,419 (whispers): Exactly. 308 00:12:32,452 --> 00:12:34,121 (sighs) 309 00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:37,791 (sighs) 310 00:12:37,825 --> 00:12:40,127 So he just never came home from proposing? 311 00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:42,262 He just disappeared? 312 00:12:42,295 --> 00:12:44,932 Maybe he moved back to England. 313 00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:47,300 I don't know. 314 00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:48,802 But he's gone. 315 00:12:55,208 --> 00:12:56,476 WOMAN (on TV): So you're sure 316 00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:57,845 a handsome fellow like you 317 00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,612 doesn't have a girlfriend. (phone vibrates) 318 00:12:59,646 --> 00:13:00,848 Yo. 319 00:13:00,881 --> 00:13:02,115 LINDSAY: You won L.A. 320 00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:03,350 What? 321 00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:04,918 Jimmy never came home either. 322 00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:06,286 Guess you guys are both pussies. 323 00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:08,188 Gretch, he's gone. 324 00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:09,857 He must've drove back to England. 325 00:13:09,890 --> 00:13:11,124 Whoa. 326 00:13:11,158 --> 00:13:13,293 Okay. 327 00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:15,162 Thanks. WOMAN (on TV): I saw everything! 328 00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:17,497 MAN: Since this is obviously over, 329 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:18,966 I'll just be (bleep) honest. 330 00:13:18,999 --> 00:13:20,533 I was gonna bang that chick. 331 00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:21,801 (exhales) 332 00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:24,037 (softly): Okay. 333 00:13:24,071 --> 00:13:25,839 (car horn honks) 334 00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:30,143 * 335 00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:36,049 (exhales) 336 00:13:37,384 --> 00:13:39,887 (siren wailing) 337 00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:42,522 (helicopter blades whirring) 338 00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:44,557 (indistinct chatter) 339 00:13:50,063 --> 00:13:53,901 So, what would you say your most pressing style needs 340 00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:56,169 are right now? Trends. 341 00:13:56,203 --> 00:13:59,139 I need to be told what the trends are going to be. 342 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:01,975 Like... what are people wearing in Japan 343 00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:03,710 next year? Hmm? 344 00:14:03,743 --> 00:14:05,145 Also, been really feeling poopy pants 345 00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:06,379 these days. 346 00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:08,048 No autographs. Uh-uh. (snaps) 347 00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,349 You need to go! 348 00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:11,718 Hi! 349 00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:13,086 You guys are out of Goldfish, by the way. 350 00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:14,421 Can I help you? Um, sorry. 351 00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:15,688 That's my... 352 00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,558 Sorry. 353 00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,928 (whispers): What are you doing? 354 00:14:20,961 --> 00:14:22,029 I tried to go outside, 355 00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:23,596 but it's boring as shit. 356 00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:25,065 Shh. It's just busses 357 00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:26,399 and old Asian ladies 358 00:14:26,433 --> 00:14:27,667 with the wheelie carts. 359 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,937 When did sounds get so loud, yo? 360 00:14:29,970 --> 00:14:31,204 Anyway, so I came here. 361 00:14:31,238 --> 00:14:32,439 What are you guys doing? Gretchen! 362 00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:34,707 I need you to listen to me. 363 00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:37,210 I cannot be your only person. 364 00:14:37,244 --> 00:14:39,446 Why not? Gretchen, 365 00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:40,747 this is my place of business. 366 00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:42,015 Go. 367 00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:43,616 But I don't want to go. Go. 368 00:14:43,650 --> 00:14:46,119 Go. Go. 369 00:14:46,153 --> 00:14:48,088 Go. 370 00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:53,193 Sorry. 371 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,962 Mentally ill neighbor. 372 00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:56,229 (chuckles) 373 00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,464 Thanks, Obama. 374 00:14:57,497 --> 00:14:58,765 (both laugh) 375 00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,868 (rock music playing from car stereo) 376 00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,903 (sighs) 377 00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:10,077 (gasps) Oh, good! You're done! 378 00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:11,611 What are we gonna do now? 379 00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:14,147 Have you been out here the whole time?! 380 00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:16,083 Yeah, just like three hours. 381 00:15:16,116 --> 00:15:17,550 (sighs) You told me to wait outside. 382 00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:19,786 I introduced this cabbie to Jack FM. 383 00:15:19,819 --> 00:15:21,754 (singsongy): He loves it! 384 00:15:21,788 --> 00:15:23,423 (laughs) Not that Jack would care. 385 00:15:23,456 --> 00:15:26,293 That guy does not play by society's rules. 386 00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:28,728 I meant go outside into the world. 387 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,130 You are losing your shit 388 00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:32,265 and moping about your ex-boyfriend, but... 389 00:15:32,299 --> 00:15:33,500 Not "ex," he's not my ex-boyfriend. 390 00:15:33,533 --> 00:15:34,767 We're still technically engaged. 391 00:15:34,801 --> 00:15:36,503 Are you goddamn kidding me? 392 00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:39,006 I don't know! Who knows?! 393 00:15:39,039 --> 00:15:40,907 You don't know! 394 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,142 Do you know? 395 00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:43,143 (sighs) 396 00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:48,581 You are my best friend in the entire world. 397 00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,083 We share a toothbrush. 398 00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:51,118 We do? 399 00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:52,519 But you can't come home tonight. 400 00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:53,953 I can go anywhere. 401 00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:55,188 I know, let's go kill someone. 402 00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:57,324 Focus! Okay. 403 00:15:57,357 --> 00:15:59,326 That's better. Babe, 404 00:15:59,359 --> 00:16:00,793 this is for your own good. 405 00:16:00,827 --> 00:16:03,263 I am only going to say this once: 406 00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:05,932 Gretchen, it's been... 407 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,367 * One week since you looked at me * 408 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,835 * Cocked your head to the side and said "I'm angry" * 409 00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:10,370 * Five days since you laughed at me * 410 00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:11,938 * You said, "Get back together, come back and see me" * 411 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,340 * Three days since the living room * 412 00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:14,774 * Realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you * 413 00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:16,176 * Yesterday you'd forgiven me 414 00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:17,810 * But it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry * 415 00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:19,046 * Hold it now and watch me hoodwink * 416 00:16:19,079 --> 00:16:20,047 * Make yourself think 417 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,148 * Think you're looking at Aquaman * 418 00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:22,449 * I summon fish to the dish, although * 419 00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,051 * I like the Chalet Swiss, I like the sushi * 420 00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:25,318 * 'Cause it's never hits the frying pan, hot like wasabi * 421 00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:26,553 * When I bust rhymes 422 00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:28,055 * Big like LeAnn Rimes 'cause I'm all about value * 423 00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:29,189 * Bert Kaempfert's got the mad hits. * (screams) 424 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:35,462 I can't take it anymore! 425 00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:36,863 EDGAR: What's wrong? Well, I just got done 426 00:16:36,896 --> 00:16:38,231 with a full day at work. 427 00:16:38,265 --> 00:16:39,732 And then I had night work, and now 428 00:16:39,766 --> 00:16:41,334 I have homework. 429 00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:42,835 That's three kinds of work. 430 00:16:42,869 --> 00:16:44,737 And Gretchen won't give me any space. 431 00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,839 She Canada-rapped at me. 432 00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:48,875 You and me, we have jobs now. 433 00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:50,110 We are businesspeople. 434 00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:53,846 (gulps) Edgar? 435 00:16:57,617 --> 00:17:00,187 We're the serious ones now. 436 00:17:00,220 --> 00:17:02,389 Oh, my God. 437 00:17:06,193 --> 00:17:09,062 I miss them. Me, too. 438 00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:15,502 (as Jimmy): My God, at least use 439 00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:17,237 a coaster, woman. (laughs) 440 00:17:17,270 --> 00:17:18,705 (laughs) 441 00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:19,939 (as Gretchen): But I'm too busy looking at 442 00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:21,408 awesome dogs on the Internet. 443 00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:24,211 Right, that's it, I can't take it anymore! 444 00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:25,845 I'm going downstairs. 445 00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:28,014 Well, I was gonna go down there anyway 446 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:30,550 to take a shower and not wash my legs. 447 00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:33,420 Maybe I'll work on my tree house blueprint. 448 00:17:33,453 --> 00:17:35,788 Perhaps I'll add a wall. 449 00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:38,024 Don't bug me in there, I'm gonna be jerking it 450 00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,359 to gangbang porn. 451 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,229 I'm going to drink alcohol in my bed 452 00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:44,297 and read a very boring book. 453 00:17:44,331 --> 00:17:46,032 No, pay attention to me. 454 00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,135 I'm Gretchen. Play with my hair. 455 00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:50,703 Rambling speech about myself, pointed insult, 456 00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:53,440 mock horror, extended metaphor that gets off track, 457 00:17:53,473 --> 00:17:55,242 and then I call myself out for it! 458 00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,877 (chuckling): Thirstiness, nasal laugh, being gross. 459 00:17:57,910 --> 00:18:00,113 Yet another reminder that I'm mentally ill. 460 00:18:00,147 --> 00:18:01,648 Thirstiness. 461 00:18:01,681 --> 00:18:03,916 Play with me. Come on, I'm Gretchen. 462 00:18:03,950 --> 00:18:05,418 Kiss me! Stop bothering me! 463 00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:07,487 I'm bored. All right, fine, I'll kiss you. 464 00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:09,122 Jesus! Yeah. 465 00:18:11,023 --> 00:18:12,825 Well, do me already, dummy. Ah, fine. 466 00:18:12,859 --> 00:18:15,295 (both chuckle) 467 00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:17,164 * Ooh... * 468 00:18:17,197 --> 00:18:20,267 (both moaning softly) 469 00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:22,969 * Ooh... * 470 00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:31,043 * Ooh... * 471 00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:38,451 Hi. 472 00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:40,287 Is this seat taken? 473 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,988 Why, no. 474 00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:48,895 * 475 00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,505 * 476 00:19:05,678 --> 00:19:08,848 (both panting) 477 00:19:08,881 --> 00:19:12,452 Listen, Edgar, that was... really good sex. 478 00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:14,321 Right? Like really good. 479 00:19:14,354 --> 00:19:17,690 But just so you know, I'm really committed to my job right now 480 00:19:17,724 --> 00:19:20,460 and I don't want you to get your feelings hurt. 481 00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:23,230 (panting softly) 482 00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:25,064 (exhales slowly) 483 00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:27,400 I am so glad you said that 484 00:19:27,434 --> 00:19:29,236 because, as amazing as that was, 485 00:19:29,269 --> 00:19:31,170 I feel, like, nothing for you. 486 00:19:31,204 --> 00:19:32,839 I am all about my job right now. 487 00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:34,073 Really? Yeah. 488 00:19:34,106 --> 00:19:35,308 Oh. Good, then. 489 00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:37,710 (both laugh) 490 00:19:41,248 --> 00:19:43,650 Oh. So, wait, 491 00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:45,485 we just had dope sex, 492 00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:46,853 and don't feel the need to discuss it. 493 00:19:46,886 --> 00:19:49,088 Ew. Not at all. 494 00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:50,557 And we could, like, do this again 495 00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:52,925 whenever we feel like it-- or not-- 496 00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:55,061 and be fine either way. 497 00:19:55,094 --> 00:19:56,396 I think so. 498 00:19:58,398 --> 00:19:59,599 Me, too. 499 00:19:59,632 --> 00:20:00,867 (laughs) 500 00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:02,101 Cool. Cool. 501 00:20:02,134 --> 00:20:03,503 Cool. Cool. Cool. 502 00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:04,737 Cool. 503 00:20:04,771 --> 00:20:06,573 You know, I could go again. 504 00:20:06,606 --> 00:20:09,175 (claps) How about this? An hour of sustained work, 505 00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:10,410 and then round two. 506 00:20:10,443 --> 00:20:13,380 You are so smart. Pssh! 507 00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:15,782 (chuckles) (sighs) 508 00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:17,750 All right. Phew! 509 00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:19,519 This is so great. (page flips) 510 00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,421 After all that time with annoying-ass Gretchen, 511 00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:23,256 you're not even trying to bother me while I... 512 00:20:23,290 --> 00:20:24,891 Shh... Sorry. 513 00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:28,261 * 514 00:20:28,295 --> 00:20:30,497 (sighs deeply) 515 00:20:46,178 --> 00:20:50,783 * Living in a concrete jungle 516 00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:57,123 * Searching for something that I * 517 00:20:57,156 --> 00:20:59,326 * Don't think I'll ever find 518 00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:00,993 Come here, you. 519 00:21:01,027 --> 00:21:03,496 * Chisel the walls of the city 520 00:21:03,530 --> 00:21:06,766 * That blinds me 521 00:21:08,301 --> 00:21:09,636 Mmm. 522 00:21:09,669 --> 00:21:11,338 There she is. 523 00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:13,072 Oh, I missed you. 524 00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:14,774 * To relate to 525 00:21:14,807 --> 00:21:18,110 (moans) Divine. 526 00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:19,612 Shh. Shh. 527 00:21:19,646 --> 00:21:21,748 Shh. 528 00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:23,316 (phone chimes and vibrates) 529 00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:29,989 (Ty moans softly) 530 00:21:30,022 --> 00:21:33,860 * Take me home 531 00:21:33,893 --> 00:21:37,597 * I am ready for it 532 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:41,167 * I know you can love 533 00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,770 * More than I can 534 00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:45,171 (Ty moaning) 535 00:21:45,204 --> 00:21:46,839 * Take me home 536 00:21:48,741 --> 00:21:52,379 * I am ready for it 537 00:21:52,412 --> 00:21:56,115 * I know you can love 538 00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:59,786 * More than I can 539 00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:03,523 * Take me home 540 00:22:03,556 --> 00:22:07,159 * I am ready for it 541 00:22:07,193 --> 00:22:10,730 * I know you can love 542 00:22:10,763 --> 00:22:12,865 * More than I... 543 00:22:12,899 --> 00:22:15,868 (dog barks) 544 00:22:15,902 --> 00:22:18,738 Captioning sponsored by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 545 00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:20,840 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH 546 00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:24,877 Hey, fellas. 547 00:22:24,911 --> 00:22:27,514 I'm on antidepressants, so I won't even cry after. 548 00:22:27,547 --> 00:22:30,349 -Are you a fan of poetry? -Which one first? 549 00:22:30,383 --> 00:22:34,086 We shall not go gentle into this good night. 550 00:22:34,787 --> 00:22:36,423 If you know what I mean. 551 00:22:38,958 --> 00:22:41,861 An FX original series 552 00:22:41,894 --> 00:22:44,330 from director Guillermo Del Toro 553 00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,766 and executive producer Carlton Cuse. 554 00:22:46,799 --> 00:22:48,768 The final chapter begins. 555 00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:50,603 The Strain. 556 00:22:50,637 --> 00:22:53,606 All new Sundays at 10:00 on FX. 557 00:22:54,807 --> 00:22:56,743 I have to eat this onion? 558 00:22:56,776 --> 00:22:58,711 -Honey, trust me. -(sighs) 559 00:22:58,745 --> 00:23:02,582 Your mom knows. It's time for you to learn these secrets. 560 00:23:07,554 --> 00:23:10,389 -How does this help? -It doesn't. Ha! 561 00:23:10,990 --> 00:23:12,258 Oh, my God. 37915

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