Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,083 --> 00:00:02,224
Happily Divorced
is shot
2
00:00:02,225 --> 00:00:03,693
before a live audience,
3
00:00:03,694 --> 00:00:06,607
and based
on what actually happened to me.
4
00:00:10,301 --> 00:00:13,102
Oh, God,
all these gorgeous guys.
5
00:00:13,103 --> 00:00:15,371
Must be so hard
for Judi working here,
6
00:00:15,372 --> 00:00:18,140
knowing not one of them
is interested in her.
7
00:00:18,141 --> 00:00:22,144
Yeah,
poor freakin' Judi.
8
00:00:25,115 --> 00:00:28,150
Whoa, Fran,
who is the last person
9
00:00:28,151 --> 00:00:30,586
from college you expect
to see in a gay bar?
10
00:00:30,587 --> 00:00:34,324
You?
11
00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:35,692
Oh, my God.
12
00:00:35,693 --> 00:00:38,194
Is that Tony,
Judi's ex-boyfriend?
13
00:00:38,228 --> 00:00:40,229
Now it all makes sense.
14
00:00:40,230 --> 00:00:43,499
This the reason Tony broke
Judi's heart in college.
15
00:00:43,500 --> 00:00:48,548
Now why couldn't he have just
been honest with her back then?
16
00:00:48,572 --> 00:00:52,642
Yeah, sweetie,
he's the black you.
17
00:00:52,676 --> 00:00:54,410
- Fran?
- Peter?
18
00:00:54,445 --> 00:00:56,379
- Hey!
- Hey!
19
00:00:56,380 --> 00:00:58,013
- Hi.
- Hey, Tony.
20
00:00:58,014 --> 00:00:59,013
- Good to see you.
- How are you?
21
00:00:59,015 --> 00:01:00,149
Oh, my God.
22
00:01:00,183 --> 00:01:01,951
What's it been?
Like, 20 years?
23
00:01:01,952 --> 00:01:03,653
Yes, God!
24
00:01:03,687 --> 00:01:05,287
Well, you guys
haven't changed a bit.
25
00:01:05,288 --> 00:01:06,723
Thanks.
26
00:01:06,724 --> 00:01:08,190
Well, he has.
27
00:01:08,191 --> 00:01:09,925
He came out
a few years ago.
28
00:01:09,960 --> 00:01:12,161
You didn't know
this guy was gay in college?
29
00:01:12,195 --> 00:01:15,931
Well... He
wasn't gay then.
30
00:01:15,932 --> 00:01:19,101
Right?
31
00:01:19,102 --> 00:01:21,637
I gotta say...
Still sexy as ever.
32
00:01:21,638 --> 00:01:24,073
Oh, well,
thank you, Tony.
33
00:01:24,107 --> 00:01:25,941
I'm talking
about Judi.
34
00:01:25,942 --> 00:01:28,544
Oh, Judi.
35
00:01:28,545 --> 00:01:29,779
He's here
to see Judi, Peter.
36
00:01:29,780 --> 00:01:32,415
I heard him, Fran.
37
00:01:32,449 --> 00:01:33,850
God,
after all these years,
38
00:01:33,851 --> 00:01:35,317
you know she's still
on my mind?
39
00:01:35,352 --> 00:01:37,487
Really?
40
00:01:37,488 --> 00:01:39,689
I've been trying
to get in touch with her,
41
00:01:39,690 --> 00:01:41,491
and I see her name
in the paper,
42
00:01:41,492 --> 00:01:43,192
and here I am.
43
00:01:44,461 --> 00:01:47,997
Judi is gonna be so excited
to see you, Tone!
44
00:01:47,998 --> 00:01:51,233
Why on earth would Judi
be so excited to see Tone?
45
00:01:51,268 --> 00:01:54,303
Look at him.
46
00:01:54,304 --> 00:01:56,606
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait.
47
00:01:56,640 --> 00:01:58,508
I am seeing someone
48
00:01:58,542 --> 00:02:01,243
that I have not seen
in forever!
49
00:02:01,244 --> 00:02:03,379
Tony Foxx.
50
00:02:04,548 --> 00:02:05,981
Hey, you.
51
00:02:06,016 --> 00:02:07,550
Hey, baby.
52
00:02:07,551 --> 00:02:09,184
You know what,
I'm gonna dedicate
53
00:02:09,185 --> 00:02:11,086
this next song
to you.
54
00:02:11,121 --> 00:02:14,356
Oh, I smell love.
55
00:02:15,759 --> 00:02:21,631
? I ?
56
00:02:21,665 --> 00:02:26,436
? Bust the windows
out your car ?
57
00:02:26,470 --> 00:02:30,907
? And no it didn't mend
my broken heart ?
58
00:02:30,941 --> 00:02:35,144
? I'll probably always
have these ugly scars ?
59
00:02:35,178 --> 00:02:39,682
? But right now
I don't care about that part ?
60
00:02:39,683 --> 00:02:43,319
? I bust the windows
out your car ?
61
00:02:43,353 --> 00:02:46,121
Hey, lovebirds!
Smile!
62
00:02:51,662 --> 00:02:53,329
? She was certain ?
63
00:02:53,330 --> 00:02:56,799
? That he was
her one and only ?
64
00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:59,368
? But their union
always seemed ?
65
00:02:59,369 --> 00:03:02,104
? A little forced ?
66
00:03:02,105 --> 00:03:04,941
? She got married anyway ?
67
00:03:04,942 --> 00:03:07,076
? Turns out
that he was gay ?
68
00:03:07,077 --> 00:03:08,444
? They're still
in love ?
69
00:03:08,445 --> 00:03:11,280
? But now she's
Happily Divorced ?
70
00:03:11,281 --> 00:03:12,982
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
71
00:03:12,983 --> 00:03:15,250
Judi,
this is so exciting.
72
00:03:15,251 --> 00:03:17,720
How long has it been
since you two saw each other?
73
00:03:17,754 --> 00:03:19,121
Well, I haven't seen him
74
00:03:19,122 --> 00:03:20,957
since he took me
to see fatal attraction,
75
00:03:20,958 --> 00:03:22,057
and then he left me
76
00:03:22,058 --> 00:03:23,793
to see if the snack bar
had any goobers.
77
00:03:23,827 --> 00:03:26,261
Did they?
78
00:03:26,296 --> 00:03:28,263
You know, you are so cute
when you're angry?
79
00:03:28,264 --> 00:03:29,499
You should have seen her
80
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:30,900
the night you went
to get those goobers.
81
00:03:30,901 --> 00:03:34,737
Oh, wait, you couldn't,
because you never came back.
82
00:03:34,771 --> 00:03:36,772
What are you
so angry about?
83
00:03:36,773 --> 00:03:40,510
What, are your man-spanx
riding up?
84
00:03:40,511 --> 00:03:42,344
Look, Judi,
I feel really bad
85
00:03:42,345 --> 00:03:43,946
about the way
I left things.
86
00:03:43,947 --> 00:03:45,848
And I have no excuse
other than the fact
87
00:03:45,849 --> 00:03:48,150
- that I was young and dumb.
- Huh.
88
00:03:48,151 --> 00:03:49,952
That's why
I've been looking for you.
89
00:03:49,953 --> 00:03:52,722
It's just that, baby,
you're hard to find.
90
00:03:52,756 --> 00:03:55,625
Yeah, well, I have
dated a few crazies
91
00:03:55,626 --> 00:03:57,827
that force me
to move around a lot.
92
00:03:57,828 --> 00:03:58,895
You know what,
I have a knack
93
00:03:58,896 --> 00:04:01,597
for attracting bums,
the unemployed,
94
00:04:01,598 --> 00:04:06,301
and old white dudes trying
to complete their bucket lists.
95
00:04:06,302 --> 00:04:10,039
Did our four years together
mean nothing to you?
96
00:04:11,441 --> 00:04:12,675
Oh, come on, baby, look.
97
00:04:12,676 --> 00:04:14,510
America just gave a brother
a second chance.
98
00:04:14,511 --> 00:04:15,645
Can't you?
99
00:04:18,048 --> 00:04:20,650
Oh, I forgot how
clever and funny...
100
00:04:20,651 --> 00:04:23,920
And cute he'd look
in your bed.
101
00:04:23,954 --> 00:04:25,955
Okay.
102
00:04:25,956 --> 00:04:29,825
Let me go get us
a bottle of cristal.
103
00:04:29,826 --> 00:04:32,327
- Uh-uh.
- Uh-uh.
104
00:04:32,328 --> 00:04:34,396
He thinks that
if he buys me
105
00:04:34,397 --> 00:04:36,365
an expensive bottle
of champagne,
106
00:04:36,366 --> 00:04:39,201
that my panties are just
gonna drop to the floor.
107
00:04:39,202 --> 00:04:43,873
That son of a bitch...
Knows me so well.
108
00:04:43,874 --> 00:04:45,407
- Judi.
- What?
109
00:04:45,408 --> 00:04:46,876
You are vulnerable
and horny.
110
00:04:46,877 --> 00:04:48,711
And maybe I've been watching
too much Wendy Williams,
111
00:04:48,712 --> 00:04:51,581
but that is a recipe
for ho-cake.
112
00:04:51,615 --> 00:04:55,051
Peter, let Judi
make her own decisions.
113
00:04:55,052 --> 00:04:56,185
Listen to me.
114
00:04:56,186 --> 00:04:58,588
Go for it.
A man can change.
115
00:04:58,589 --> 00:05:02,758
A man can't change.
Shut up, Fran.
116
00:05:02,759 --> 00:05:04,660
Remember,
Elliot changed too.
117
00:05:04,661 --> 00:05:06,762
Everybody said
that Elliot was not for me,
118
00:05:06,763 --> 00:05:08,831
including Elliot,
and now, look!
119
00:05:08,832 --> 00:05:10,700
If you do this,
you'll be making
120
00:05:10,701 --> 00:05:12,768
the same mistake
you made last time.
121
00:05:12,769 --> 00:05:14,704
Oh, I can't make
the same mistake.
122
00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:19,976
You can only give up
your virginity once-ish.
123
00:05:19,977 --> 00:05:21,844
You know,
I'm sorry it took so long,
124
00:05:21,845 --> 00:05:23,178
but I stopped
at the corner store
125
00:05:23,179 --> 00:05:25,414
to get you
some goobers.
126
00:05:25,415 --> 00:05:26,782
Aww.
127
00:05:26,783 --> 00:05:28,718
Wow.
128
00:05:28,719 --> 00:05:30,052
After 20 years,
129
00:05:30,053 --> 00:05:32,121
the box has gotten
so much bigger.
130
00:05:32,122 --> 00:05:35,424
I, uh, wouldn't
advertise that if I were you.
131
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:39,074
Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org
132
00:05:45,035 --> 00:05:48,470
Cesar, you're supposed
to be working.
133
00:05:48,505 --> 00:05:51,440
Well, I have
a very good excuse.
134
00:05:51,441 --> 00:05:54,476
You're not supposed
to be here.
135
00:05:54,477 --> 00:05:56,311
Why aren't you at the gym
with miss Judi?
136
00:05:56,312 --> 00:05:58,547
Well, I already lost
ten pounds.
137
00:05:58,548 --> 00:05:59,749
You know,
I was honest with you.
138
00:05:59,750 --> 00:06:02,284
Why can't you
be honest with me?
139
00:06:02,285 --> 00:06:03,853
Did Judi call?
140
00:06:03,854 --> 00:06:05,587
She was a no-show
at the gym.
141
00:06:05,588 --> 00:06:07,389
She hasn't answered
any of my texts.
142
00:06:07,390 --> 00:06:11,093
And I know she's probably fine
with this new guy in her life,
143
00:06:11,094 --> 00:06:12,828
but I'm getting
a little worried.
144
00:06:12,829 --> 00:06:15,397
A new guy?
What happened to Ricardo?
145
00:06:15,398 --> 00:06:17,332
The I always hear her
telling you about.
146
00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:19,035
He's so strong
and powerful,
147
00:06:19,036 --> 00:06:22,705
and always takes her
where she wants to go.
148
00:06:22,706 --> 00:06:27,209
Ricardo
is her shower massage.
149
00:06:27,210 --> 00:06:28,610
What?
150
00:06:28,611 --> 00:06:32,782
I don't even want to know
who Javier is.
151
00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:34,850
Uh, hey, Jude.
It's me... Fran.
152
00:06:34,851 --> 00:06:36,752
Listen, you know,
I haven't heard from you
153
00:06:36,753 --> 00:06:38,154
in a couple of days,
154
00:06:38,155 --> 00:06:40,690
so could you shoot me a text
or buzz me,
155
00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:41,690
just to let me know that...
156
00:06:41,692 --> 00:06:43,859
Those uggs
at woodland hills
157
00:06:43,860 --> 00:06:45,627
are, uh, in stock.
158
00:06:45,628 --> 00:06:49,198
Thank you so much, Jolene.
159
00:06:49,232 --> 00:06:51,533
I'm thinking of doing
these homemade empanadas
160
00:06:51,534 --> 00:06:53,468
on friday night
when Judi and Tony come over.
161
00:06:53,469 --> 00:06:54,536
Have they confirmed?
162
00:06:54,537 --> 00:06:55,738
No, they
haven't confirmed.
163
00:06:55,739 --> 00:06:56,872
Would you back off?
164
00:06:56,873 --> 00:06:58,107
Listen, Peter,
165
00:06:58,108 --> 00:06:59,942
when you finally
get a man in your life,
166
00:06:59,943 --> 00:07:04,346
and you go running over
to him on your walker,
167
00:07:04,347 --> 00:07:08,684
you won't be returning
my calls so fast either.
168
00:07:08,685 --> 00:07:11,653
When are you
getting married already?
169
00:07:11,654 --> 00:07:13,189
Peter, Judi is fine.
170
00:07:13,190 --> 00:07:15,057
Stop texting her
every five minutes.
171
00:07:15,092 --> 00:07:17,059
- I'm not doing that.
- Well, neither am I.
172
00:07:17,060 --> 00:07:18,728
So we haven't heard from her
in three days.
173
00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:21,864
- So what?
- Big deal.
174
00:07:21,865 --> 00:07:23,933
Three days,
you haven't heard from her?
175
00:07:23,934 --> 00:07:26,202
She calls you back
when you haven't even called,
176
00:07:26,203 --> 00:07:28,904
to find out
why you haven't called.
177
00:07:28,939 --> 00:07:30,239
Oh, boy.
178
00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:31,907
Does this sound familiar?
179
00:07:31,908 --> 00:07:34,376
Let's flash back
to 1987.
180
00:07:34,377 --> 00:07:37,646
Mullet.
181
00:07:37,647 --> 00:07:40,682
Thinner.
182
00:07:40,683 --> 00:07:43,185
Straight.
183
00:07:43,186 --> 00:07:45,020
No.
Tony dumped Judi.
184
00:07:45,021 --> 00:07:47,389
We didn't hear
from her for days.
185
00:07:47,390 --> 00:07:49,191
Then we found her
on her dorm room floor
186
00:07:49,192 --> 00:07:52,261
in a puddle
of vodka and cheese whiz.
187
00:07:52,262 --> 00:07:54,663
Well, oh, my God, Peter,
188
00:07:54,664 --> 00:07:56,799
you're not telling me
that you want us to schlep
189
00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:58,634
all the way
over to Judi's house
190
00:07:58,635 --> 00:08:00,402
just to check up on her.
191
00:08:00,403 --> 00:08:01,402
I don't think
we have to do that.
192
00:08:01,404 --> 00:08:04,140
Oh, all right,
stop pushing me.
193
00:08:04,174 --> 00:08:05,807
I'm not pushing you.
I just said...
194
00:08:05,808 --> 00:08:08,077
Enough already.
We'll go, Peter.
195
00:08:08,078 --> 00:08:09,945
I've got
her keys right here.
196
00:08:09,946 --> 00:08:12,447
All right,
we'll go!
197
00:08:12,448 --> 00:08:14,416
By the way,
I thought you loved my mullet.
198
00:08:14,417 --> 00:08:17,419
Yeah, well, I thought
you loved my vagina.
199
00:08:29,366 --> 00:08:30,666
- Oh, my...
- Oh, my God.
200
00:08:33,270 --> 00:08:35,738
Call 911!
Call 911!
201
00:08:35,772 --> 00:08:37,706
What!
202
00:08:37,707 --> 00:08:40,009
What the hell
are you doing?
203
00:08:41,778 --> 00:08:43,879
What the hell
are we doing?
204
00:08:43,914 --> 00:08:45,814
We... uh, we were...
205
00:08:45,815 --> 00:08:47,150
In the neighborhood.
We were...
206
00:08:47,151 --> 00:08:49,618
And, uh,
then we, uh,
207
00:08:49,653 --> 00:08:51,987
didn't hear back from you about
the dinner party friday night.
208
00:08:51,988 --> 00:08:52,987
That's right.
209
00:08:52,989 --> 00:08:55,024
And are you coming?
210
00:08:55,059 --> 00:08:57,493
Can we talk
about this another time?
211
00:08:57,494 --> 00:08:59,695
Like when I'm wearing
some pants?
212
00:08:59,729 --> 00:09:02,265
Ab... abso...
Of course we can.
213
00:09:02,266 --> 00:09:03,699
Well, we'll see you
at 7:30.
214
00:09:03,733 --> 00:09:05,401
I can never
pull it together by 7:30.
215
00:09:05,402 --> 00:09:06,669
Are you nuts?
216
00:09:06,670 --> 00:09:08,037
I'm not gonna
be cooking at 8:00, because...
217
00:09:08,038 --> 00:09:09,072
Are you people serious?
218
00:09:09,073 --> 00:09:13,309
Bye bye!
219
00:09:13,343 --> 00:09:15,178
Oh, my God.
I'm dying.
220
00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:18,647
I know!
Did you see those pecs?
221
00:09:18,648 --> 00:09:21,784
He was like
a Nubian God.
222
00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:26,422
Have you not made
any new friends since college?
223
00:09:34,264 --> 00:09:37,266
Hey, guys.
Where's Tony?
224
00:09:37,301 --> 00:09:38,934
Oh, he's meeting me here.
225
00:09:38,935 --> 00:09:41,137
Mm.
Something smells good.
226
00:09:41,171 --> 00:09:42,405
Well,
how far away is he?
227
00:09:42,406 --> 00:09:44,140
Obviously,
the man has no idea
228
00:09:44,141 --> 00:09:47,276
how temperamental
a corn souffle can be.
229
00:09:47,311 --> 00:09:51,547
That's because
he's straight, Peter.
230
00:09:51,548 --> 00:09:53,983
Oh, I have to say, Fran,
this has been
231
00:09:53,984 --> 00:09:56,452
the best week
of my life.
232
00:09:56,487 --> 00:09:58,887
Oh, Judi,
I'm so happy...
233
00:09:58,888 --> 00:10:01,957
That I was so right.
234
00:10:01,958 --> 00:10:04,026
No, seriously, Fran.
235
00:10:04,027 --> 00:10:06,862
You know how you're always
talking nonstop about Elliot,
236
00:10:06,863 --> 00:10:09,832
and it makes me want to throw up
and feel bad about myself.
237
00:10:09,866 --> 00:10:12,435
Uh-huh
238
00:10:12,436 --> 00:10:14,737
well, I don't
feel that way anymore.
239
00:10:14,738 --> 00:10:19,108
Judi got a man, bitches!
240
00:10:19,109 --> 00:10:22,111
All right, dinner's ready.
Still no Tony?
241
00:10:22,112 --> 00:10:23,146
Not yet.
242
00:10:23,147 --> 00:10:24,146
Well,
we have to eat this
243
00:10:24,148 --> 00:10:26,249
in the next five minutes!
244
00:10:26,283 --> 00:10:29,619
It's not my rule.
It's Martha Stewart!
245
00:10:29,653 --> 00:10:33,156
Calm down... my baby's just
running a little late.
246
00:10:33,157 --> 00:10:36,259
He's coming.
247
00:10:39,630 --> 00:10:43,866
He's not coming!
248
00:10:43,900 --> 00:10:46,001
Oh, Judi.
249
00:10:46,002 --> 00:10:49,639
Maybe the San Diego freeway
is just backed up.
250
00:10:49,673 --> 00:10:52,508
To where?
New Jersey?
251
00:10:52,543 --> 00:10:53,809
Sorry, Judi.
252
00:10:53,810 --> 00:10:57,046
That was
my ruined souffle talking.
253
00:10:57,047 --> 00:11:00,516
I can't believe I let Tony
do this to me twice.
254
00:11:00,551 --> 00:11:02,218
I'm such a dumb ass.
255
00:11:02,219 --> 00:11:03,786
Oh, don't
beat yourself up.
256
00:11:03,787 --> 00:11:06,389
The man wasn't
good enough for you.
257
00:11:06,423 --> 00:11:07,657
No...
258
00:11:07,658 --> 00:11:10,560
But he was!
259
00:11:10,594 --> 00:11:14,129
He didn't deserve a girl
as wonderful as you.
260
00:11:14,130 --> 00:11:15,665
No...
261
00:11:15,699 --> 00:11:18,301
But he does!
262
00:11:18,335 --> 00:11:20,269
Judi, stop it.
263
00:11:20,270 --> 00:11:22,771
So you used
a little bad judgment.
264
00:11:22,772 --> 00:11:24,674
Look at it
like a life lesson.
265
00:11:24,675 --> 00:11:26,342
Next time
you meet a guy
266
00:11:26,343 --> 00:11:28,211
that makes you feel
all hot and bothered,
267
00:11:28,212 --> 00:11:31,113
maybe you won't
go for it so fast.
268
00:11:31,114 --> 00:11:35,351
Maybe this heartache
happened for a reason.
269
00:11:35,352 --> 00:11:36,552
Yeah.
270
00:11:36,587 --> 00:11:41,490
You!
271
00:11:41,491 --> 00:11:42,858
Me?
272
00:11:42,892 --> 00:11:44,927
I was all ready
to freeze Tony out,
273
00:11:44,928 --> 00:11:46,195
and you were all like...
274
00:11:46,196 --> 00:11:48,197
"Go for it, Judi.
275
00:11:48,198 --> 00:11:51,601
People change."
276
00:11:51,635 --> 00:11:53,669
Judi, let's be fair.
277
00:11:53,670 --> 00:11:55,838
Fran's heart
was in the right place.
278
00:11:55,872 --> 00:11:59,408
But she was wrong.
279
00:11:59,409 --> 00:12:01,009
Frannie, you pushed me!
280
00:12:01,044 --> 00:12:02,511
Not pushed...
Encouraged.
281
00:12:02,546 --> 00:12:04,280
Those are two
very different things.
282
00:12:04,314 --> 00:12:05,448
- Oh, yeah?
- How so?
283
00:12:05,482 --> 00:12:07,683
Well...
284
00:12:07,684 --> 00:12:11,854
I wasn't expecting
a follow-up question.
285
00:12:11,888 --> 00:12:13,623
You know what?
Forget this.
286
00:12:13,624 --> 00:12:16,235
Forget y'all!
Forget him!
287
00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:18,971
Judi!
288
00:12:18,972 --> 00:12:23,208
Well, I hope she doesn't
"bust the windows out your car."
289
00:12:30,284 --> 00:12:32,519
And now,
I'm alone again.
290
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,287
And I hate
my best friend.
291
00:12:34,288 --> 00:12:37,176
I don't know why
I always keep listening to Fran.
292
00:12:37,177 --> 00:12:39,259
Neither do I, darling.
293
00:12:39,260 --> 00:12:42,996
She's not the brightest bulb
on the menorah.
294
00:12:43,031 --> 00:12:44,531
Hi, mom.
295
00:12:44,532 --> 00:12:46,099
Why are you here?
296
00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:47,701
Well, my parents
live here.
297
00:12:47,735 --> 00:12:49,502
Why are you here?
298
00:12:49,537 --> 00:12:52,706
Because I needed some love
and motherly comfort.
299
00:12:52,740 --> 00:12:56,409
So why are you here?
300
00:12:56,410 --> 00:12:58,444
Oy, there's
two of them now?
301
00:12:58,479 --> 00:12:59,780
What are we running here?
302
00:12:59,781 --> 00:13:02,015
A home for lost girls
who are past their prime?
303
00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:07,721
Judi, I'm sorry
about Tony,
304
00:13:07,755 --> 00:13:11,158
but I just wanted you to find
your soul mate like I have.
305
00:13:11,159 --> 00:13:13,860
Ma, tell her that the way
things turned out with Tony
306
00:13:13,861 --> 00:13:15,028
isn't my fault.
307
00:13:15,063 --> 00:13:16,462
I'm not gonna do that.
308
00:13:16,463 --> 00:13:18,865
You're both
like my daughters.
309
00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:22,435
What do you mean, "like"?
310
00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:25,438
And, Judi, darling.
It's all your fault.
311
00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:26,707
Thank you.
312
00:13:26,741 --> 00:13:28,575
You took
relationship advice
313
00:13:28,609 --> 00:13:34,181
from a woman who slept
with a gay man for 18 years.
314
00:13:34,182 --> 00:13:35,982
We expect
better from you, Judi.
315
00:13:35,983 --> 00:13:39,452
You were always
the smart one.
316
00:13:39,453 --> 00:13:42,823
Now, I understand that you're
middle aged and reckless,
317
00:13:42,824 --> 00:13:44,490
but there's an old saying...
318
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:49,295
"Don't crap
where you eat."
319
00:13:49,296 --> 00:13:51,131
Ma, that has
nothing to do
320
00:13:51,132 --> 00:13:52,899
with what
we're talking about now.
321
00:13:52,934 --> 00:13:58,004
You get
what you pay for.
322
00:13:58,039 --> 00:14:00,640
You know,
he just spit me out
323
00:14:00,641 --> 00:14:02,675
like a piece of gum
that lost its flavor.
324
00:14:02,710 --> 00:14:04,477
And just like last time,
325
00:14:04,478 --> 00:14:05,746
I didn't have
a chance to tell him
326
00:14:05,747 --> 00:14:06,747
what an ass he is.
327
00:14:06,781 --> 00:14:08,581
Well, do it now, Judi.
328
00:14:08,582 --> 00:14:10,617
Go over to him
and tell him
329
00:14:10,651 --> 00:14:12,786
what you wanted
to tell him 20 years ago.
330
00:14:12,820 --> 00:14:16,456
That I love him
and I want to have his babies?
331
00:14:16,490 --> 00:14:20,026
Oy, we should have
stopped after one.
332
00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:23,029
No.
This is your chance.
333
00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:27,134
Go to Tony
and aim your anger at him
334
00:14:27,168 --> 00:14:30,804
instead of the one person
who loves you so much
335
00:14:30,805 --> 00:14:33,573
that she chose
bridesmaids dresses
336
00:14:33,574 --> 00:14:35,541
that aren't
off the shoulders,
337
00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:38,178
because my mother said your
shoulders aren't that great.
338
00:14:40,915 --> 00:14:43,049
What's wrong
with my shoulders?
339
00:14:43,084 --> 00:14:44,517
Nothing...
340
00:14:44,518 --> 00:14:48,354
That a puff sleeve
wouldn't hide.
341
00:14:48,355 --> 00:14:50,356
Why am I here?
342
00:14:50,391 --> 00:14:53,493
Right?
343
00:14:57,020 --> 00:14:59,966
Judi, this is gonna be
very cathartic for you.
344
00:14:59,967 --> 00:15:01,734
Are you ready?
345
00:15:01,735 --> 00:15:04,337
Oh, yeah.
I'm ready to do this.
346
00:15:06,140 --> 00:15:07,941
- Just a minute.
- Oh, don't give me
347
00:15:07,942 --> 00:15:10,043
"just a minute."
Open the damn door.
348
00:15:10,044 --> 00:15:13,413
You go, girl!
Do the right thing!
349
00:15:13,414 --> 00:15:15,849
Fight the power!
350
00:15:15,850 --> 00:15:18,285
One too many.
351
00:15:18,286 --> 00:15:20,120
Tony, come out here!
352
00:15:20,121 --> 00:15:21,955
And let me tell you,
I am not above
353
00:15:21,956 --> 00:15:24,057
putting sugar
in your gas tank,
354
00:15:24,058 --> 00:15:27,660
having your utilities cut off,
and ruining your good credit!
355
00:15:27,661 --> 00:15:30,063
Yeah, she thought
she knew you!
356
00:15:30,064 --> 00:15:32,665
Well, she's moving on.
She's met a new man.
357
00:15:32,666 --> 00:15:35,535
She's getting married
to a big record producer, and...
358
00:15:35,536 --> 00:15:38,271
Uh, my moment, Fran?
359
00:15:38,272 --> 00:15:42,608
Sorry, must be working out
some personal issues.
360
00:15:42,643 --> 00:15:47,113
Tony, get your ass out here,
you coward!
361
00:15:47,114 --> 00:15:49,950
Who are you?
Who is that?
362
00:15:49,951 --> 00:15:51,918
Oh, my God.
363
00:15:51,919 --> 00:15:53,253
What happened?
364
00:15:53,254 --> 00:15:54,587
Looks like Mr. Foxx
had a heart attack
365
00:15:54,588 --> 00:15:58,524
on the treadmill
sometime yesterday afternoon.
366
00:15:58,525 --> 00:16:02,262
Judi!
He didn't dump you.
367
00:16:02,263 --> 00:16:05,198
He died!
368
00:16:12,547 --> 00:16:14,281
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
369
00:16:14,282 --> 00:16:15,948
Can you
take me to him?
370
00:16:15,949 --> 00:16:18,051
Yes, yes.
It's okay, it's okay.
371
00:16:18,052 --> 00:16:19,686
- We're here.
- Okay.
372
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:22,389
- We're here.
- You're gonna be fine.
373
00:16:22,390 --> 00:16:24,524
Oh, God.
It's an open casket.
374
00:16:24,559 --> 00:16:26,593
Peter, get a grip.
375
00:16:26,594 --> 00:16:29,696
Oh, God, I've never seen
a real-live dead body.
376
00:16:33,067 --> 00:16:35,902
Aww.
377
00:16:35,903 --> 00:16:37,404
Look at Tony.
378
00:16:37,405 --> 00:16:39,306
He looks
so peaceful.
379
00:16:39,340 --> 00:16:40,973
He wouldn't look so peaceful
if he knew
380
00:16:40,974 --> 00:16:44,177
they made him look
like little Richard.
381
00:16:44,178 --> 00:16:49,216
I want to look so bad,
but I know I can't.
382
00:16:49,217 --> 00:16:51,451
We could have
had it all, Fran.
383
00:16:51,485 --> 00:16:54,221
We should have had
it all, Fran!
384
00:16:54,255 --> 00:16:56,856
Tony was the love
of my life.
385
00:16:56,890 --> 00:16:59,526
Better to have
loved and lost
386
00:16:59,527 --> 00:17:04,063
than to have loved and still
have him living in the den.
387
00:17:06,033 --> 00:17:08,468
I'm so sorry, Tony.
388
00:17:08,502 --> 00:17:11,338
I can't believe
that I even doubted you.
389
00:17:11,372 --> 00:17:13,773
Why did you have
to come back into my life
390
00:17:13,774 --> 00:17:17,143
only to leave me again?
391
00:17:17,144 --> 00:17:20,747
Oh, Tony!
392
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:24,484
Why?
393
00:17:27,688 --> 00:17:30,523
Oh, you poor thing.
394
00:17:30,524 --> 00:17:32,325
How did you know
my husband?
395
00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:35,328
Your what?
396
00:17:35,329 --> 00:17:37,731
- Okay, it's time to go.
- Married?
397
00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:40,433
Did she just say
he's married?
398
00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:42,702
You think you were
gonna come back into my life,
399
00:17:42,703 --> 00:17:45,004
and think you
were gonna get away with it?
400
00:17:45,005 --> 00:17:47,940
You have got
to be out of your mind!
401
00:17:47,941 --> 00:17:49,609
Is he crazy?
402
00:17:56,384 --> 00:18:00,086
Thank you.
It was a lovely affair.
403
00:18:03,123 --> 00:18:05,057
That's good, Judi.
404
00:18:05,058 --> 00:18:09,128
Clear the air
of all of Tony's bad energy.
405
00:18:10,398 --> 00:18:13,767
Doesn't smell
like sage.
406
00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:18,371
It better not,
for what it cost.
407
00:18:20,775 --> 00:18:28,281
Well, on the upside...
Anybody?
408
00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:29,516
I got one.
You know what?
409
00:18:29,517 --> 00:18:31,250
I realized something.
410
00:18:31,251 --> 00:18:33,186
The reason why
men never ask me out
411
00:18:33,187 --> 00:18:36,356
is not because I'm desperate,
needy, or getting old.
412
00:18:36,390 --> 00:18:39,926
It's because I was obsessed
with Tony for 20 years.
413
00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:42,261
I mean, men sense that.
414
00:18:42,296 --> 00:18:45,164
That's why I never date.
That's why I'm alone.
415
00:18:45,199 --> 00:18:49,402
Okay.
416
00:18:49,437 --> 00:18:50,837
And you know,
there is something good
417
00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:52,539
that I can get
from all of this.
418
00:18:52,540 --> 00:18:55,342
You know, finally,
I feel like I can love again.
419
00:18:55,343 --> 00:18:56,743
Like I'm alive.
420
00:18:56,777 --> 00:19:01,080
Unlike Tony.
421
00:19:01,081 --> 00:19:02,915
Sorry.
422
00:19:02,916 --> 00:19:06,185
That's really good sage.
423
00:19:06,220 --> 00:19:08,287
Well, I'm glad
something positive
424
00:19:08,288 --> 00:19:09,656
came out of this, Jude.
425
00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:12,892
So... In the end,
it turns out.
426
00:19:12,893 --> 00:19:15,161
- I was right to push you...
- Fran, Fran.
427
00:19:15,162 --> 00:19:17,831
Okay.
428
00:19:17,865 --> 00:19:20,132
No, no, no, no, Peter.
Fran is right.
429
00:19:20,133 --> 00:19:23,102
I mean, I would not have gotten
to this place without Fran.
430
00:19:23,136 --> 00:19:26,105
- Hmm.
- I was obsessed with Tony.
431
00:19:26,106 --> 00:19:29,942
I mean, his chiseled face,
his washboard abs,
432
00:19:29,943 --> 00:19:32,178
his suckable lips.
433
00:19:32,179 --> 00:19:34,080
I swear, if that beautiful man
called me tonight, I would...
434
00:19:34,081 --> 00:19:37,751
He's not
gonna call you, Judi.
435
00:19:43,691 --> 00:19:46,793
Did we move?
436
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:50,123
Best watched using Open Subtitles MKV Player
437
00:19:50,173 --> 00:19:54,723
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
30581
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
