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1
00:00:09,885 --> 00:00:13,764
Come on. Come on. Should be
just enough to finish the job.
2
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,642
Phew! Can't be too careful
with this stuff.
3
00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:20,062
(alarm sounding )
4
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:25,734
( clock beeping )
"Warning."
5
00:00:25,943 --> 00:00:27,611
Blah blah blah...
6
00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:30,239
"Extreme usage could result
in minor gravity anomalies."
7
00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:32,449
Can it, Poindexter.
I've come this far.
8
00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:34,409
I'm not giving up now.
9
00:00:34,618 --> 00:00:35,869
( Blares )
10
00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:42,042
Yes, this is it!
11
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:45,754
( Bleats )
12
00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:05,357
STAN: It's gonna be a bumpy ride,
but it'll all be worth it.
13
00:01:11,363 --> 00:01:13,031
Just eighteen more hours.
14
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,867
Finally, everything changes...
15
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:17,119
today.
16
00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:36,888
MABEL: Aah! It's here!
It's here! It's here!
17
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:38,849
( Yawns )
18
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:41,852
Okay, so I was just opening
random doors, because I'm a creep,
19
00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:44,479
when I found
something amazing!
20
00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:47,816
If it was worth waking up at
7:00 am for, that will be amazing.
21
00:01:48,025 --> 00:01:49,818
Feast your eyes!
22
00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:51,486
DIPPER: Whoa!
23
00:01:51,695 --> 00:01:53,864
Bro. Bro.
We're both thinkin' it.
24
00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:56,283
BOTH: Crazy rooftop
fireworks party!
25
00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:58,619
Not so fast, kids.
26
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:03,206
There is no way on earth you're setting
off those dangerous, illegal fireworks...
27
00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:04,333
without me.
28
00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:08,962
(all laughing)
29
00:02:09,171 --> 00:02:10,589
Here you go, sweetie!
30
00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:13,425
Set something on fire for your
Grunkle Stan!
31
00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,927
I am the god
of destruction!
32
00:02:17,179 --> 00:02:19,931
ALL: ( laughing )
Whoa!
33
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,517
Yay! Whoo!
34
00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:24,394
Hold on a minute.
Do you have a permit for those?
35
00:02:24,561 --> 00:02:25,896
Uh...
36
00:02:26,104 --> 00:02:28,106
Uh, do you have a permit
for being totally lame?
37
00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:30,400
( All laughing )
HEY-o!
38
00:02:30,609 --> 00:02:33,403
( Chuckles )
Well, I can't argue with that.
39
00:02:33,612 --> 00:02:34,780
Carry on.
40
00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:36,782
Ha ha!
( sighs )
41
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:39,117
But seriously, though, we should
probably clean this mess up.
42
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:43,747
With water balloons?
43
00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:44,873
I don't see why not.
44
00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:48,877
Seriously?
45
00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:50,170
Ow.
Whoo!
46
00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:52,756
Ah, this is what
Saturdays are for.
47
00:02:52,923 --> 00:02:54,341
Doing dumb things forever!
48
00:02:54,549 --> 00:02:56,343
BOTH:
Dumb things forever!
49
00:02:56,551 --> 00:02:58,679
( laughing )
Whoa, there!
50
00:02:58,887 --> 00:02:59,680
To Grunkle Stan!
51
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:02,265
Not just a great uncle--
52
00:03:02,474 --> 00:03:03,975
The greatest uncle!
53
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,187
Ha ha. All right,
all right. I tell ya,
54
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:10,774
it's unnatural for siblings to
get along as well as you do.
55
00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:13,402
Ha ha! Don't worry, we've still
got plenty of summer left
56
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:14,903
to drive each other crazy.
57
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:20,867
Heh...yeah...
plenty of summer left.
58
00:03:21,076 --> 00:03:24,162
Kids, there's something I, uh...
something I should tell you.
59
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:27,374
It's, um... W-well, it's
complicated.
60
00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:29,167
I...
61
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:31,837
I'm gonna go refresh my soda.
62
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,505
Enjoy it while you can, Stan.
63
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,507
They'll find out
sooner or later.
64
00:03:36,675 --> 00:03:38,677
Today's the day.
65
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:39,970
What is that, a ladybug?
66
00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:41,888
(grunting )
67
00:03:42,097 --> 00:03:43,473
What the--
Oh, no!
68
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:44,558
(grunts)
69
00:03:45,976 --> 00:03:47,894
Target's secure.
Take the house.
70
00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:50,397
( Helicopters whirring )
What the...?
71
00:03:50,605 --> 00:03:51,440
Kids are secure.
72
00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:53,191
Roof team, go!
73
00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,864
Clear!
74
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:00,574
Clear!
75
00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:01,783
( Squeals )
76
00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:04,161
Pig secure--we
have secured a pig.
77
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:07,998
STAN:
( groaning )
78
00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:10,125
Hey, hands off, you stooge!
79
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:11,877
Aah! I don't understand!
80
00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:15,297
What did I do that warrants
this much arresting?
81
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,341
The government guys?
82
00:04:18,550 --> 00:04:20,385
I thought you
got eaten by zombies.
83
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:22,137
We survived...barely.
84
00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:24,181
I used Trigger
as a human shield.
85
00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:25,849
He cried like a baby.
86
00:04:26,057 --> 00:04:26,850
Wha--hey!
87
00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:28,643
Not in front
of the special ops guys.
88
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:31,855
This is security footage
of a government waste facility.
89
00:04:32,063 --> 00:04:36,276
At 0400 hours last night, someone robbed
300 gallons of dangerous waste.
90
00:04:36,443 --> 00:04:37,903
What? You think
that's me?
91
00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:39,780
Don't play dumb
with us, Pines!
92
00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:42,491
But I actually am dumb!
Last night I was restocking
93
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:43,784
the gift shop...I swear!
94
00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:46,286
Wait, Grunkle Stan!
95
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,955
You've got the wrong guy!
Our Grunkle Stan might shoplift
96
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:52,876
the occasional tangerine,
but he's notsome evil supervillain.
97
00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:55,837
Listen, kid. We've been watching
your family all summer,
98
00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:57,714
and we've seen
some disturbing things,
99
00:04:57,881 --> 00:05:00,717
but nothing as dangerous
as what your uncle is hiding.
100
00:05:00,884 --> 00:05:03,887
Somewhere hidden in this
shack is a doomsday device!
101
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:07,390
Trigger, you take
the children.
102
00:05:07,599 --> 00:05:10,352
I'll talk to the old man.
Sorry to break it to you, kids,
103
00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:12,687
but you don't know
your uncle at all.
104
00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:16,691
Icee pop, clear!
Hey!
105
00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:27,869
Kids! You gotta believe me!
For once I'm actually innocent!
106
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:29,788
Kids!
107
00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:32,874
(siren wailing )
108
00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:35,544
Headin' into work,
doot doo doo doo doo
109
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:37,003
Ground team,
move move move!
110
00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:38,171
Break down the door!
111
00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:40,090
Or...maybe not.
112
00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:53,728
Stanford Pines, you stand accused
of theft of government waste,
113
00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:56,565
conspiracy, and possession
of illegal weapons.
114
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,358
How do you plead
to these charges?
115
00:05:58,567 --> 00:06:01,695
Uh..."guiltoccent."
I mean, "innoguilty."
116
00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:04,197
Um...can I
have my phone call?
117
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:08,952
Okay, give me whatever you
got that comes with a free toy.
118
00:06:09,119 --> 00:06:10,662
( Radio static )
Soos!
119
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:13,874
Mr. Pines? Is this some sort
of possession situation?
120
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:14,749
Soos, pick up!
121
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,084
Mr. Pines,
what happened?
122
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:17,627
I heard you got arrested
or something?
123
00:06:17,836 --> 00:06:18,837
I had to go get
some panic food.
124
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,672
Listen, I need
something from you.
125
00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:22,549
You know that vending machine
in the gift shop?
126
00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:24,843
I need you to guard it
with your life.
127
00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:26,887
No matter what happens,
no matter who talks to you,
128
00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:28,722
don't let them touch
that machine!
129
00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:30,891
( static, beeping )
130
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:34,728
Time for a repair guy...
to become a repair man.
131
00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:37,480
Sir, your Junior Yum-Yum
Baby-Time Kiddo Meal?
132
00:06:37,689 --> 00:06:39,357
Just put one in my mouth.
133
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:43,778
Let's do this.
134
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:51,077
We've got Mr. Pines
in custody.
135
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,954
Our men are searching
the shack for that device.
136
00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:55,248
You take care
of those kids.
137
00:06:55,457 --> 00:06:57,083
( gasps )
What are you gonna do to us?
138
00:06:57,292 --> 00:07:00,086
- We'll be taking you to child services.
- Boo!
139
00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:02,797
In the meantime, enjoy
some mindless reality TV...
140
00:07:02,964 --> 00:07:05,717
designed to pacify you and make
you stop asking questions.
141
00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:08,178
I'm about to make
the incision.
142
00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:10,180
K er-prank!
Aah!
143
00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:13,099
You're watching Ker-Prank'd
with Justin Ker-Prank.
144
00:07:13,308 --> 00:07:14,893
Dipper, this is crazy.
145
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,187
There's no way Stan was
stealing hazardous waste.
146
00:07:17,395 --> 00:07:18,605
We gotta clear his name!
147
00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:19,731
Hmm...
148
00:07:21,942 --> 00:07:24,361
Wait a minute,
the security tapes!
149
00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:27,197
Didn't Stan say he was restocking
the gift shop last night?
150
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,032
If we could get the Mystery Shack's
surveillance tapes,
151
00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:30,617
we could prove
he's innocent!
152
00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:33,912
We just need to think
of a way out of here.
153
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:36,456
Think, Mabel. Think.
154
00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:44,547
( Tapping on window )
( squeaking on glass )
155
00:07:50,762 --> 00:07:52,931
( gasps)
No!
156
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:56,142
Oh oh oh aah!
157
00:07:56,351 --> 00:07:57,477
Aah!
Aah!
158
00:07:57,686 --> 00:08:00,021
TRIGGER: Mayday, mayday!
Agent down!
159
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,859
Uhh! Darn branch!
160
00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:07,362
Uhh!
l-la ha! Yes!
161
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:10,281
Backup! Requesting
backup! Aah!
162
00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:15,578
Come on, Dipper. We're gonna go
clear our uncle's name.
163
00:08:15,787 --> 00:08:18,665
Oh, you poor kids. You really think
your uncle's innocent?
164
00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:21,793
I've seen it all before.
False names, double lives.
165
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:23,503
One minute, they're playing
with water balloons.
166
00:08:23,712 --> 00:08:25,672
The next, they're building
doomsday devices.
167
00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:27,841
Your uncle scammed
the whole world.
168
00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:29,300
You gonna let him
scam you, too?
169
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:33,388
You--you don't know
what you're talking about.
170
00:08:33,596 --> 00:08:35,265
You're gonna regret this!
171
00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:36,683
( airbag deploys)
Aah!
172
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,865
Only five more hours
till it happens.
173
00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:53,700
I gotta be there!
Come on, Stan,
174
00:08:53,908 --> 00:08:54,868
you gotta think
of a way out of this.
175
00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:56,369
Think!
Think!
176
00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:58,246
( Watch alarm beeping )
Huh?
177
00:08:58,455 --> 00:09:00,707
( Alarm beeping )
178
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,172
They're getting stronger!
179
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:08,465
Of course, that's it!
180
00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:13,553
H-hey! Whoa!
181
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,722
Is it just me, or did the entire
world just hiccup?
182
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:18,391
I'm sure it's just
a baby-sized earthquake.
183
00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:20,643
Aww, baby-sized!
184
00:09:23,104 --> 00:09:25,106
It's happening!
The end times!
185
00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:28,526
When that machine activates,
I gotta get outta town!
186
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:32,781
Git in there,
raccoon wife, git!
187
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,950
Eh?
( panting )
188
00:09:36,159 --> 00:09:37,744
( panting )
189
00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:39,370
( police siren )
190
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:43,666
MABEL: All right,
here's the plan.
191
00:09:43,875 --> 00:09:45,126
I'll take out
those two guard guys,
192
00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:47,295
you karate-chop the other dude
in the neck,
193
00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:49,297
and then we'll back-flip
through the front door!
194
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,966
Mabel, aren't you forgetting
the simpler solution?
195
00:09:52,175 --> 00:09:53,093
Oh, right.
196
00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,136
So is it a rock,
or is it a face?
197
00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:57,806
I think...
it's a metaphor.
198
00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:13,113
All right.
If I was Stan,
199
00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:16,032
where would I hide
those surveillance tapes?
200
00:10:21,663 --> 00:10:23,790
Wait! The Antelabbit!
201
00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:25,125
Don't you mean
"jackalope"?
202
00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:26,918
Pfft!
That can't be right.
203
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:31,673
Yes!
Yes!
204
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,174
MABEL: It's this week!
This is it!
205
00:10:35,093 --> 00:10:37,637
( Dance music playing ) Go!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
206
00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,181
Someone yelled "Wormy Dance."
We had to!
207
00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:41,516
Fast-forward.
208
00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:46,771
DIPPER: Ha! There it is!
Stan restocking, like he said.
209
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,523
And the date shows
it was last night!
210
00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:50,233
It's proof!
He's innocent!
211
00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,032
Uh-oh.
212
00:10:58,241 --> 00:11:00,785
Uh, maybe he's just going
to the bathroom outdoors,
213
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,287
the way nature intended.
214
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:07,041
( Gasps )
215
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:09,752
DIPPER: Oh, no.
Stan, you didn't!
216
00:11:09,919 --> 00:11:12,755
Don't panic. That could be
anyone in that suit.
217
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:15,675
Aah! Hot Belgian waffles!
218
00:11:15,884 --> 00:11:20,889
Wait, I'm alone. I can swear
for real! Son-of-a--
219
00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:22,849
That's him, all right.
220
00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:26,978
Okay, okay. So maybe Grunkle Stan
stole some toxic waste.
221
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,981
That doesn't mean he's leading
a nefarious double life.
222
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,567
Mabel,
I'm not so sure about that.
223
00:11:36,237 --> 00:11:38,656
What?
What is all this?
224
00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:40,742
Stetson Pinefield?
225
00:11:40,950 --> 00:11:44,454
Hal Forrester?
Andrew "8-Ball" Alcatraz?
226
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:46,748
These are fake IDs, Mabel!
227
00:11:46,956 --> 00:11:49,209
You wouldn't need these unless you
were trying to hide your real identity.
228
00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:51,294
But why would Stan
do that?
229
00:11:58,927 --> 00:11:59,969
What?
230
00:12:00,178 --> 00:12:02,347
DIPPER: "Stan Pines Dead"?
231
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,849
MABEL: "Foul play suspected
in Pines' death."
232
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:08,770
"Fiery car crash,
brakes cut..." By who?
233
00:12:11,022 --> 00:12:13,733
DIPPER: "Unnamed grifter
at large"?
234
00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:15,693
Why would they call him
"unnamed"?
235
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,737
Unless Stan...
236
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:18,738
...isn't...
237
00:12:18,947 --> 00:12:20,782
n-Stan?!
Stan?!
238
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:29,457
DIPPER: Stan Pines is dead?
239
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:31,334
Then who have we
been living with?
240
00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:32,710
It doesn't make
any sense!
241
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:35,046
There has to be
some explanation.
242
00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:36,839
Maybe we're getting
Ker-Pranked!
243
00:12:37,048 --> 00:12:38,800
Justin Ker-Prank
is gonna jump up
244
00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,928
from behind one of these plants,
any minute now!
245
00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:45,598
Any minute, Justin.
246
00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:47,934
Can't believe it! This whole summer
I've been looking for answers,
247
00:12:48,142 --> 00:12:50,812
and the biggest mystery
was right under our nose.
248
00:12:51,020 --> 00:12:53,690
There's gotta be some kind
of explanation in here, somewhere.
249
00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:54,691
What the--?
250
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:57,318
"Secret Code to Hideout"?
251
00:12:57,485 --> 00:12:59,237
Let me see that!
252
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:01,781
A1, B, C3...
253
00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:03,825
I've never seen
a code like this.
254
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:05,159
Wait, I have!
255
00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:07,620
Dipper,
it's the vending machine!
256
00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:14,544
All right, Pines.
Play time is over.
257
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:16,879
Chopper's ready
to dust off to Washington.
258
00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:18,798
I'll enjoy
putting you away.
259
00:13:19,007 --> 00:13:21,551
What? Um, can't we stick
around for maybe one minute,
260
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,720
uh, one minute,
thirty seconds?
261
00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:26,723
We're not falling
for your games, Pines.
262
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,558
You've been running
your whole life.
263
00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:31,227
Your time is finally up.
264
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,730
Bathroom break?
Just gimme 15 seconds.
265
00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:35,857
Sorry, but you've got
a flight to catch.
266
00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:42,780
Oh, yeah?
So do you!
267
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:44,282
Huh?
268
00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:46,701
(grunting )
269
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:51,497
POWERS: Whoa, whoa, hey!
270
00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:53,333
Aah!
271
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:54,542
(grunting )
272
00:13:57,462 --> 00:14:00,757
POWERS: Hey!
Dang it, get back here!
273
00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:02,383
POWERS: Men, get him!
274
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:08,598
POWERS: No! You won't get
away with this! Aah!
275
00:14:11,059 --> 00:14:13,186
-Aah!
-Gonna get ya! Gonna get ya!
276
00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:15,396
POWERS: Ow!
( coffee mug breaks )
277
00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,690
Whoa!
278
00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:18,775
You know where
the Mystery Shack is?
279
00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:19,901
Uh, yeah.
280
00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:21,194
Okay,
here's a hundred bucks.
281
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,904
Drive as far away
from the Shack as possible,
282
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,573
and don't stop when the cops
start chasing you!
283
00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:31,204
POWERS: He's getting away!
284
00:14:31,412 --> 00:14:34,082
Obviously,
follow that cab!
285
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:38,461
Stanford escaped!
He's at large!
286
00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:41,589
We need to sweep the town!
Move, move, move!
287
00:14:54,811 --> 00:14:56,104
All right, Soos,
remember the plan.
288
00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:57,814
Protect the machine,
earn Stan's trust,
289
00:14:58,022 --> 00:15:00,483
legally get adopted by Stan,
change name to Stan Junior.
290
00:15:00,691 --> 00:15:01,651
DIPPER: Soos!
Aah!
291
00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:03,194
Oh, kids,
where have you been?
292
00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:04,904
W-what are you doing here?
293
00:15:05,113 --> 00:15:06,906
Stan gave me a mission
to protect this machine.
294
00:15:07,115 --> 00:15:08,908
Ha! And I thought
I loved snacks!
295
00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:11,327
Soos, listen. Something huge
is going on here.
296
00:15:11,536 --> 00:15:13,329
If Stan is hiding
some dangerous secret,
297
00:15:13,538 --> 00:15:14,914
we need to find out
what it is!
298
00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:17,125
I need you
to step aside.
299
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:21,379
Yeah, just let us through so we can prove
this is all just a big misunderstanding.
300
00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:25,508
Guys, I know this seems crazy, but I promised
Stan I would guard this with my life.
301
00:15:26,717 --> 00:15:28,970
I'm sorry, Soos.
302
00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:32,140
Aah! Attack glitter!
It's pretty, but it hurts!
303
00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:33,683
Please, Soos!
C'mon, Soos!
304
00:15:33,891 --> 00:15:35,893
Aw, c'mon, I don't wanna
fight you guys!
305
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:38,146
This hurts me
more than it hurts you!
306
00:15:38,354 --> 00:15:39,897
( Grunting)
SOOS: Aah!
307
00:15:40,106 --> 00:15:42,483
Seriously, it hurts me
way more than it hurts you.
308
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,906
ALL: Aah!
309
00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:51,951
ALL: ( coughing )
310
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:52,952
Ohh...
311
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,579
ALL: ( gasp )
312
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:00,877
It's like something
from a video game.
313
00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:02,587
Or a dream.
314
00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:03,921
Or a nightmare.
315
00:16:08,384 --> 00:16:11,929
I gotta be there
when it happens! Aah!
316
00:16:17,018 --> 00:16:17,977
ALL: ( gasp )
317
00:16:21,355 --> 00:16:22,940
Guys, are we dreaming?
Somebody wake me up.
318
00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:24,859
This...can't be real.
319
00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:28,237
I don't understand. Why would
Mr. Pines have all this?
320
00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:30,656
It's just like
that bunker in the woods.
321
00:16:30,865 --> 00:16:33,075
But what is it doing
underneath the Mystery Shack?
322
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:36,829
Okay, okay, so he's got a huge,
gigantic lab.
323
00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:38,748
That doesn't mean
anything bad.
324
00:16:38,956 --> 00:16:40,374
Everyone's got secrets!
325
00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:43,794
It's still Stan,
and he loves us.
326
00:16:43,961 --> 00:16:45,922
And we love him,
right?
327
00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:48,049
Can't be...
it's impossible.
328
00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:50,593
DIPPER: The other two journals?!
329
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,596
All this time, all this time,
Stan had them!
330
00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,474
I can't believe it!
Was anything he said to us real?
331
00:16:56,641 --> 00:16:58,351
Why would he have
those journals?
332
00:16:58,559 --> 00:16:59,560
Maybe he's the author.
333
00:16:59,769 --> 00:17:01,604
Or maybe he stole them
from the author!
334
00:17:01,812 --> 00:17:03,814
Maybe the reason he has
all of those fake IDs
335
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,691
is because he is
a master criminal,
336
00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:08,027
and this machine
is his master plan!
337
00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:15,326
Whoa!
( gasps )
338
00:17:17,912 --> 00:17:19,622
"I was wrong the whole time."
339
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:22,708
"The machine was meant to create
knowledge, but it is too powerful!"
340
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:24,835
"I was deceived,
and now it is too late!"
341
00:17:25,002 --> 00:17:26,629
"The device,
if fully operational,
342
00:17:26,837 --> 00:17:28,464
"could tear our universe apart!"
343
00:17:31,008 --> 00:17:33,010
"It must not fall
into the wrong hands.
344
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:36,847
"If the clock ever reaches zero,
our universe is doomed."
345
00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:42,645
It's the final countdown!
Just like they always sung about!
346
00:17:46,023 --> 00:17:48,442
The agents were right!
We have to shut it down!
347
00:17:51,279 --> 00:17:52,863
ALL: ( gasp )
348
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:00,871
There! Quick!
349
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,459
Turn these! Together!
350
00:18:07,962 --> 00:18:09,672
That's it!
The shutdown switch!
351
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,636
This all stops now!
352
00:18:15,803 --> 00:18:19,890
Don't touch that button!
( panting )
353
00:18:24,854 --> 00:18:25,938
Dipper, just back away.
354
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:30,776
Please don't press that shutdown
button. You gotta trust me.
355
00:18:30,985 --> 00:18:32,278
And I should trust you, why?
356
00:18:32,486 --> 00:18:34,155
After you stole
radioactive waste,
357
00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:35,990
after you lied to us
all summer!
358
00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,908
I don't even know
who you are!
359
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,535
Look, I know this
all seems nuts,
360
00:18:39,744 --> 00:18:41,162
but I need that machine
to stay on.
361
00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:42,747
If you just
let me explain--
362
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,541
( watch beeping )
Oh! Oh, no! Brace yourselves!
363
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,127
ALL: (yelling )
364
00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:56,010
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
365
00:18:57,053 --> 00:18:58,012
Aah!
366
00:18:59,055 --> 00:19:00,931
ALL: (yelling )
367
00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:06,812
COMPUTER: T-minus 35 seconds.
368
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,856
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
369
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:11,275
Whoa, aah!
370
00:19:11,442 --> 00:19:12,777
MABEL: Dipper!
371
00:19:13,944 --> 00:19:16,864
Mabel! Hurry!
Shut it down!
372
00:19:17,073 --> 00:19:19,241
(grunting )
373
00:19:19,450 --> 00:19:21,452
No!
374
00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:22,787
STAN: Mabel, Mabel, wait!
375
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:24,372
Stop! Uhh!
376
00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:26,916
Soos, what are you doing?
I gave you an order!
377
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:28,834
Sorry, Mr. Pines,
if that is your real name,
378
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:31,837
but I have a new mission now,
protecting these kids!
379
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,631
Soos, you idiot,
let me go!
380
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:34,799
(grunts)
381
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:36,884
Let me go!
C'mon!
382
00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:38,636
Mabel, press
the red button!
383
00:19:38,803 --> 00:19:41,430
- Shut it down!
- No, you can't! You gotta trust me!
384
00:19:41,639 --> 00:19:46,477
Grunkle Stan, I don't even know
if you're my Grunkle!
385
00:19:46,686 --> 00:19:48,312
I wanna believe you,
but--
386
00:19:48,479 --> 00:19:50,022
Then listen to me.
Remember this morning,
387
00:19:50,231 --> 00:19:53,067
when I said I wanted
to tell you guys something?
388
00:19:53,275 --> 00:19:54,694
COMPUTER: T-minus 20 seconds.
ALL: ( yelling )
389
00:19:57,822 --> 00:20:00,616
I wanted to say that you're gonna hear
some bad things about me,
390
00:20:00,825 --> 00:20:04,078
and some of 'em are true, but trust
me, everything I've worked for,
391
00:20:04,245 --> 00:20:06,997
everything I care about,
it's all for this family.
392
00:20:07,164 --> 00:20:08,833
Mabel,
what if he's lying?
393
00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:11,585
This thing could destroy
the universe! Listen to your head!
394
00:20:11,794 --> 00:20:13,170
STAN: Look into my eyes, Mabel!
395
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:14,839
You really think
I'm a bad guy?
396
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:17,883
He's lying!
Shut it down, now!
397
00:20:18,092 --> 00:20:18,801
STAN: Mabel, please!
398
00:20:19,009 --> 00:20:20,344
COMPUTER: Ten, nine...
399
00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:25,891
Grunkle Stan...
400
00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:27,518
COMPUTER: Six, five...
401
00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:32,106
I trust you.
402
00:20:32,314 --> 00:20:34,400
Mabel, are you crazy?!
We're all gonna--
403
00:20:34,608 --> 00:20:35,735
COMPUTER: One.
404
00:20:37,862 --> 00:20:38,904
No!
405
00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:39,905
Aah!
406
00:20:40,114 --> 00:20:40,906
Aah!
407
00:20:41,115 --> 00:20:42,032
Aah!
408
00:21:17,943 --> 00:21:20,571
W-what?
Who is that?
409
00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,615
The author
of the journals.
410
00:21:24,408 --> 00:21:26,869
STAN: My brother!
411
00:21:27,077 --> 00:21:28,871
Is this the part
where one of us faints?
412
00:21:29,079 --> 00:21:33,667
Oh, I am so on it, dude.
413
00:21:33,717 --> 00:21:38,267
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