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1
00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:05,000
Cheers is filmedbefore a live studio audience.
2
00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:09,200
What are you
doing, Cliff? What?
3
00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:11,200
Well, I'm, uh, leaving
a tip there for Carla.
4
00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:12,200
Yeah?
5
00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:14,000
Yeah, one of the oldest
bar tricks
6
00:00:14,100 --> 00:00:15,100
in the book there, Normie.
7
00:00:15,200 --> 00:00:17,700
Look, you see I filled
the glass with water.
8
00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:20,400
I'm gonna invert it on top
of this dollar bill.
9
00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:22,400
Put it on the bar, right?
10
00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:24,200
Looks... Looks, uh,
empty now, doesn't it?
11
00:00:24,300 --> 00:00:25,400
Mm-hmm.
12
00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,400
Well, watch what happens
when she comes to get her tip.
13
00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:31,100
Fasten your seat belts
and wait for the fun to begin.
14
00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:34,300
Oh.
15
00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:38,000
Thanks for the tip, Cliff.
16
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,700
Uh, joke's still
on her.
17
00:00:46,700 --> 00:00:49,500
She's the one that's got
to mop up all this mess.
18
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:50,500
(laughs)
19
00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:57,100
Thank you, Carla.
20
00:00:57,200 --> 00:00:59,100
Your apology's
accepted.
21
00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:03,500
(theme song begins)
22
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:07,900
� Making your way
in the world today �
23
00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:11,100
� Takes everything you've got �
24
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:13,800
� Taking a break
from all your worries �
25
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:17,200
� Sure would help a lot
26
00:01:17,300 --> 00:01:21,100
� Wouldn't you like
to get away? �
27
00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:24,700
� Sometimes you want to go
28
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:29,200
� Where everybody
knows your name �
29
00:01:30,500 --> 00:01:35,100
� And they're always
glad you came �
30
00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:37,400
� You wanna be
where you can see �
31
00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:39,900
� Our troubles
are all the same �
32
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:44,200
� You wanna be where
everybody knows your name �
33
00:01:45,500 --> 00:01:47,400
� You wanna go
where people know �
34
00:01:47,500 --> 00:01:50,600
� People are all the same
35
00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:55,300
� You wanna go where
everybody knows your name. �
36
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:14,900
Hey, guys.
37
00:02:14,900 --> 00:02:15,900
Hey, Wood.
Hi, Wood.
38
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:16,900
Mom finally sent out
39
00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:18,700
Grandma Meg's pressure cooker,
40
00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:21,200
so last night I whipped up
a batch of chili.
41
00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:22,700
Oh.
Do you want
to try some?
42
00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:23,900
Yeah.
Sure.
43
00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:25,200
It's from an old
family recipe.
44
00:02:25,300 --> 00:02:26,600
Oh, your
grandma's?
45
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,800
Nah, this old family
that lived down the road.
46
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:32,300
Mmm!
47
00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:33,500
Woody, this is
excellent!
48
00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:34,700
Mmm!
Mmm!
49
00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:36,000
Normie, what
do you think?
50
00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:36,600
(belches)
51
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:38,900
He likes it!
52
00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,900
Normie likes it!
53
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:43,800
Woody, I'm sorry. It seems
we've eaten all your chili.
54
00:02:43,900 --> 00:02:45,800
I still got plenty left
in the thermos.
Great.
55
00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:52,700
I didn't have breakfast today,
all right?
56
00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,500
(door opening)
57
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:58,300
Quick, Normie,
turn on the Weather Channel.
58
00:02:58,400 --> 00:02:59,200
You know, I wonder
59
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:01,600
if that sentence has
ever been spoken before.
60
00:03:03,300 --> 00:03:04,200
(female voice on TV)
61
00:03:04,300 --> 00:03:05,600
Oh, yeah, there she is.
62
00:03:05,700 --> 00:03:06,800
Who?
63
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:08,300
Weathergirl Dorothy,
my favorite.
64
00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:10,700
Isn't she dreamy?
65
00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:12,800
Cliff, everybody
looks sort of dreamy
66
00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:15,200
when they have giant clouds
floating behind them.
67
00:03:15,300 --> 00:03:16,600
No, no.
Listen, listen.
68
00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:19,100
She's got the cutest
little lateral lisp.
69
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,100
Oh, I always get a giggle
when she tries to pronounce...
70
00:03:21,100 --> 00:03:23,300
(lisping):
...stratocumulus.
71
00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:26,000
So you, uh... you watch this
a lot, do you?
72
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,100
Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah.
73
00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:29,200
You get, uh,
kind of a fatherly feeling
74
00:03:29,300 --> 00:03:31,500
about these, uh, weather anchors
after a while.
75
00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:33,900
Yeah, well, besides,
it's on all night.
76
00:03:35,900 --> 00:03:38,500
You're a very lonely
man, aren't you, Cliff?
77
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:41,800
Not as long
as I got my Weather Channel.
78
00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,200
Hey, guys.
79
00:03:45,300 --> 00:03:46,700
Hey, Sammy's back!
(all shouting greetings)
80
00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:48,000
Hey, how was
your weekend
81
00:03:48,100 --> 00:03:49,600
up in the mountains
with Natalie?
82
00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:50,900
It was so great.
83
00:03:50,900 --> 00:03:52,900
Nothin' like shushing down
those fine white slopes.
84
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,100
NORM:
Yeah.
85
00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:55,200
Oh, you went
skiing, huh?
86
00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:56,500
No, no, no.
87
00:03:56,600 --> 00:03:59,900
You're a dog!
88
00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:01,800
Oh!
89
00:04:01,900 --> 00:04:03,600
Goodie. Sam, you're back.
90
00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:05,300
Hey, that's
what Natalie said.
91
00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:06,600
No, actually,
actually, she said,
92
00:04:06,700 --> 00:04:09,100
"Oh, goodie, Sam, your front."
93
00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:10,300
(laughter)
94
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:13,900
I have a very, very
special surprise for you,
95
00:04:13,900 --> 00:04:17,000
so just close your
eyes and come with me.
96
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,800
This is deja vu of
the whole weekend.
97
00:04:18,900 --> 00:04:20,000
FRASIER:
Oh!
98
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:25,900
Okay, you can
open your eyes.
99
00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:28,000
(chuckling):
Okay.
100
00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:32,800
Well?
101
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:34,600
I can't tell you
102
00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:38,100
how much better
Natalie's surprise was.
103
00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:40,100
What, you
don't like it?
104
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:43,700
Well, it...
It's-It's just...
105
00:04:44,700 --> 00:04:46,000
Boy.
106
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:47,800
I mean, it's-it's
really...
107
00:04:47,900 --> 00:04:49,400
Boy.
108
00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:50,800
No, that's...
that's not...
109
00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:52,200
That's not the
right word.
110
00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:53,500
It's not
boy at all.
111
00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,000
It's, um... It's...
112
00:04:55,100 --> 00:04:56,200
It's a tearoom.
113
00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:58,900
Thanks for not making me guess.
114
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,800
Well, so what-what do you think?
115
00:05:00,900 --> 00:05:03,400
Well, you want my, uh,
honest first impression?
116
00:05:03,500 --> 00:05:05,600
My gut reaction?
117
00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:06,200
Yes, I do.
118
00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:07,300
I hate it. I hate it.
119
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:08,500
I hate it!
120
00:05:08,500 --> 00:05:10,100
Now how could you
121
00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:12,300
do this without
asking me first?
122
00:05:12,300 --> 00:05:13,900
Without asking you first?
123
00:05:13,900 --> 00:05:16,700
Wait a minute! I happen to have
paid $25,000 to John Hill
124
00:05:16,700 --> 00:05:18,100
to get this poolroom back.
125
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:19,500
If it hadn't been for me,
126
00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:21,100
you wouldn't even have
this poolroom!
127
00:05:21,100 --> 00:05:22,200
I don't have a poolroom.
128
00:05:22,300 --> 00:05:23,500
I have a tearoom.
129
00:05:23,500 --> 00:05:24,700
Ish!
130
00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:26,900
Oh, oh, oh.
131
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:28,400
Look what you
made me do.
132
00:05:28,500 --> 00:05:29,700
You made me
say "ish."
133
00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,200
(scoffs)
134
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:33,800
What's that on the floor?
135
00:05:33,900 --> 00:05:36,500
It's a throw rug.
136
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:37,700
Oh.
137
00:05:37,700 --> 00:05:39,200
Oh, hey.
138
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:40,600
Look at that.
It works.
139
00:05:40,700 --> 00:05:42,000
Wait.
140
00:05:42,100 --> 00:05:44,700
This wouldn't happen to
be a throw table, would it?
141
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:46,500
No. Sam, wait!
142
00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:47,600
You know, if you're gonna
take my money,
143
00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:51,100
I think my ideas deserve
a little bit more respect.
144
00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,400
All right.
145
00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:55,900
You're right.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
146
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,900
Uh, this just came
as a little bit
147
00:05:58,000 --> 00:05:59,800
of a shock to me,
that's all.
148
00:05:59,900 --> 00:06:03,200
Tell you what, why don't I,
uh, just, uh, go outside here
149
00:06:03,300 --> 00:06:05,900
and come back in
and start fresh?
150
00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:07,900
That would be good, Sam.
Thank you.
151
00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:12,600
I hate it. Hate it. I hate it!
152
00:06:12,700 --> 00:06:14,600
Ish!
153
00:06:17,300 --> 00:06:19,800
I'm putting that room
back the way it was!
154
00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:22,200
As soon as I find
my pool table.
155
00:06:22,300 --> 00:06:24,600
CLIFF:
Three ball,
corner pocket.
156
00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:28,600
Thanks, Sam.
157
00:06:28,700 --> 00:06:30,700
A little too much
English on that.
158
00:06:31,700 --> 00:06:33,300
REBECCA:
Sam,
159
00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:35,600
please, now I know... I know
I sprung this on you, but
160
00:06:35,700 --> 00:06:36,600
please give it a chance.
161
00:06:36,700 --> 00:06:37,900
I think it
could work.
162
00:06:37,900 --> 00:06:39,100
My marketing survey showed
163
00:06:39,100 --> 00:06:41,600
that this neighborhood was
in need of something like this.
164
00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:44,300
People want to go
to a place where
they can just relax.
165
00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:46,300
You know, a nice,
quiet, pretty little place
166
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:48,200
where they can
just sit and talk.
167
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,500
(belches)
168
00:06:51,500 --> 00:06:53,100
Good one.
169
00:06:56,300 --> 00:06:58,300
Honey, you're crazy.
I-I have people coming in here
170
00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:00,900
just to shoot stick. I mean, I
bet that poolroom makes me
171
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:03,100
an extra hundred
bucks a night.
Yeah, well,
172
00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,600
I bet with my tearoom,
I could make 500 bucks tonight.
173
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:08,400
500 bucks
in one night?
Yes.
174
00:07:08,500 --> 00:07:10,400
What else are you selling
back there?
175
00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:13,700
Sam, it's my grand opening.
176
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:15,800
I've been promoting
all over town.
177
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,900
You make 500 bucks in one night,
and-and that tearoom is yours.
178
00:07:18,900 --> 00:07:20,100
It's a bet.
179
00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:21,300
Okay, it's a bet.
(chuckles)
180
00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:23,400
But I want you to know
there's no losers here
181
00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:25,400
because I'm gonna share
half the profit with you.
182
00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:27,000
Oh ho! Ooh!
183
00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:28,800
Half the profits
of a tearoom!
184
00:07:28,900 --> 00:07:30,200
Oh!
185
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:33,100
Oh, boy,
why didn't you say so before?
186
00:07:33,100 --> 00:07:34,600
Let's figure
this out here.
187
00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:36,700
All right, let's see.
We'll, uh,
188
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:37,700
start with your profits.
189
00:07:37,700 --> 00:07:39,500
That'd be... ooh!
190
00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:41,800
Wait, wait, wait.
Now I get half of this.
191
00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:42,800
(muttering):
Let me. Hmm...
192
00:07:42,900 --> 00:07:44,400
Ooh, another... ooh!
193
00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:46,000
Fellas, fellas, look.
194
00:07:46,100 --> 00:07:47,600
I get a great
big zero,
195
00:07:47,700 --> 00:07:49,300
and I don't have
to lift a finger!
196
00:07:49,300 --> 00:07:50,800
Oh, thank you,
thank you.
197
00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:53,200
I can retire! Ooh!
198
00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,000
God, he's a butthead.
199
00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:07,400
DOROTHY:
Now, let's take a look
at the regional map.
200
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:09,900
(lisping):
The southern sectors
will experience scattered clouds
201
00:08:10,100 --> 00:08:12,000
over the Mississippi Basin.
202
00:08:12,100 --> 00:08:13,600
Boy.
203
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:14,700
(chuckles)
204
00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:16,600
Don't you just
love how she says
205
00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:17,800
(lisping):
"Mississippi Basin"?
206
00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:19,800
It just melts your
heart, doesn't it, huh?
207
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:20,900
Mm-hmm.
208
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,600
You know, I, uh,
sent a fan letter to my Dorothy.
209
00:08:23,700 --> 00:08:24,900
Hmm?
210
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,600
Yeah, I wonder
if she'll ever even read it.
211
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:28,400
I mean,
they must get so many. Hmm.
212
00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:30,300
You know, I don't
think so, Cliff.
213
00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:33,000
I don't think that
many people watch
the Weather Channel.
214
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:34,400
Seriously,
I don't think
215
00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:36,600
that many people know
there is a Weather Channel.
216
00:08:36,700 --> 00:08:38,600
Hmm. Boy, Norm,
are you out of touch!
217
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,700
Hey, Fras, Lilith.
218
00:08:43,700 --> 00:08:44,800
Get you a drink?
219
00:08:44,900 --> 00:08:47,300
No, Sam, we are not here
for libation this day.
220
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,900
We are here for the grand
opening of Rebecca's tearoom.
221
00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:53,400
Oh, yeah? Yeah?
222
00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:56,500
What, you gonna go back there
and, uh, make fun of her?
223
00:08:58,100 --> 00:09:01,400
No, we're-we're going
to go have some tea.
224
00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:02,900
Oh, yeah, yeah,
then you're, what...?
225
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:06,200
You're gonna spit it
on the floor and laugh at her?
226
00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:10,300
We're just going to order it
and drink it down.
227
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:13,000
Well, what's funny about that?
228
00:09:13,100 --> 00:09:14,900
We're not trying
to be funny.
229
00:09:14,900 --> 00:09:17,100
We're just here for some tea.
230
00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:18,800
Is that so hard to believe?
231
00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:20,800
Yeah, seein' how
she's been open all day,
232
00:09:20,900 --> 00:09:22,200
and you're the first customers.
(chuckles)
233
00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:25,600
Oh, well, maybe the word
hasn't gotten out yet.
234
00:09:25,700 --> 00:09:29,100
Although, she did send
us this lovely invitation
235
00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:31,600
hand-calligraphed
on a lace doily.
236
00:09:31,700 --> 00:09:33,600
Didn't anyone else
get one of these?
237
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,800
Very funny.
238
00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:41,500
Could have put someone's
eye out, you know.
239
00:09:45,100 --> 00:09:46,600
Let's go, Frasier.
240
00:09:46,700 --> 00:09:48,000
Wait, wait,
wait, Fras.
241
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:49,800
You're not really
gonna go in there
242
00:09:49,900 --> 00:09:51,400
and drink tea,
are ya?
243
00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:53,800
Come on out here
and sit at the bar,
244
00:09:53,900 --> 00:09:56,800
you know,
with the guys.
245
00:09:56,900 --> 00:09:58,800
Have a beer.
Yeah.
246
00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:03,300
Well, I guess I-I could.
247
00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:04,700
(clears throat)
248
00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:05,900
No.
249
00:10:08,100 --> 00:10:10,500
I mean, you're-you're tellin' us
you're just gonna go back there
250
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:13,300
and sit with your wife
and sip tea, huh?
251
00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:15,500
Yup, that's me.
252
00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:18,200
Whipped and proud of it.
253
00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:23,600
Thank you.
254
00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:24,800
Here you are.
255
00:10:24,900 --> 00:10:26,800
Please allow me.
256
00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:31,400
All right, there.
257
00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,000
Now you'll notice on the menu
258
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:35,700
that we have a...
a wide selection of sandwiches
259
00:10:35,700 --> 00:10:40,300
and delectables, and, uh,
many, many varieties of tea.
260
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,100
So, what can I get you?
261
00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:44,400
Just some tea, please.
262
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:48,200
That's it? Just tea?
263
00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:50,500
Well, perhaps
I could tempt you
264
00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:52,700
with some tiny
little sandwiches or
265
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:54,600
fresh biscuits?
266
00:10:55,900 --> 00:10:58,600
Scones?
267
00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:00,600
We're both watching our diets,
268
00:11:00,600 --> 00:11:03,400
so two pots of Orange Pekoe
would be lovely.
269
00:11:03,500 --> 00:11:04,600
FRASIER:
Hon,
270
00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:05,700
maybe we should split a pot.
271
00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:08,300
Well...
272
00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:11,700
Per-Perhaps one of my slightly
more expensive herbal teas?
273
00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:13,200
Uh, no, thank you.
274
00:11:13,300 --> 00:11:16,100
You guys cannot just have tea.
275
00:11:16,100 --> 00:11:17,300
Tea is a
loss leader.
276
00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:19,500
I lose money
just boiling the water.
277
00:11:20,900 --> 00:11:21,900
And, Lilith, look.
278
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,100
(blows through lips)
279
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:24,300
You are hardly fat.
280
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,800
You are borderline anorexic.
281
00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:28,600
Just
282
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:29,400
pig out!
283
00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:30,900
Order some strawberry tarts.
284
00:11:30,900 --> 00:11:32,600
Strawberries make me break out.
285
00:11:32,700 --> 00:11:35,400
Well, at least that will put
a little color in your face.
286
00:11:37,700 --> 00:11:39,800
Perhaps we won't have
anything at all.
287
00:11:39,900 --> 00:11:41,000
Fine!
288
00:11:41,100 --> 00:11:43,000
I don't really care. Get out!
289
00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:47,500
Thanks for coming.
Tell all your friends.
290
00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:53,400
Frasier, Lilith,
oh, I'm sorry.
291
00:11:53,500 --> 00:11:55,400
I'm sorry. I'm
just desperate.
292
00:11:55,400 --> 00:11:57,200
I don't understand
why nobody wants
293
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:59,100
to come back into my
beautiful tearoom.
294
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:01,100
Well, Rebecca,
295
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:04,100
a restaurant should be...
296
00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:06,100
like a mistress.
297
00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:08,200
You see,
298
00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:12,200
one shouldn't feel that
she's overeager to please.
299
00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:13,800
It's far more enticing
300
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:15,800
if you need her more
than she needs you.
301
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:20,600
Who is this "she"
302
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:22,600
you're talking
about, Frasier?
303
00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:24,600
Purely hypothetical.
304
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:25,900
Well, it's a
little strange
305
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,700
for a happily
married man
306
00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:29,500
to go prattling on
about a mistress.
307
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:31,000
Oh, come on, hon,
give me this one.
308
00:12:31,100 --> 00:12:32,500
You already heard me
admit I was whipped
309
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:33,700
in front of the boys.
310
00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:35,400
That was good.
311
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,900
You were right, Sam.
312
00:12:40,900 --> 00:12:42,200
Nobody's gonna come
in here
313
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:44,100
and have high tea
and crumpets.
314
00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:45,500
Oh, don't give
up hope.
315
00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:47,800
(Cockney accent):
Maybe a carriage
will break down
316
00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:50,700
in front of the pub
and everyone'll come
in for a cup of tea.
317
00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:52,100
Have a cup of
tea, please.
318
00:12:52,100 --> 00:12:54,100
Have a cup of tea.
God, I hate you!
319
00:12:57,000 --> 00:13:00,000
Okay, guys.
320
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:03,100
Just made up a fresh new batch
of chili.
321
00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:05,100
(cheering)
322
00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:06,800
Now all I ask
323
00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:08,500
is you please
leave me some this time.
324
00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:14,300
You guys really like
that chili, don't you?
Mmm.
325
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:15,800
Well, do you
think that
326
00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:19,000
if I sold that kind of
chili in my tearoom that,
327
00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:20,700
uh, I could make
$500 a night?
328
00:13:20,700 --> 00:13:21,400
Easy. But, uh,
329
00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:23,000
why would anyone want
to go back there?
330
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,500
We got a free pot
of chili right here.
331
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:26,700
Good point.
332
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:28,800
Chili in the tearoom!
333
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,300
Chili in the tearoom!
334
00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:35,200
Sammy, kiss that poolroom
good-bye, pal.
335
00:13:47,300 --> 00:13:49,700
Sam, she's sellin' an awful
lotta chili in there.
336
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,400
She must be gettin'
pretty close
337
00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:53,400
to that $500 mark.
Oh, come on.
338
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:54,900
So she's sellin' a
couple of bowls.
339
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,900
I mean, how much chili
can a guy eat?
340
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,100
Boy, I can't eat another
mouthful.
341
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,000
Uh-huh, see
what I mean?
342
00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:01,700
Thank goodness they sell
these gallon buckets
343
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,800
for take-out.
344
00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:06,600
Oh, man,
345
00:14:06,700 --> 00:14:07,900
I'm gonna lose
my poolroom.
346
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,800
I've gotta think of some
way to stop her.
347
00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:10,900
I agree with you,
Sammy.
348
00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:12,000
Go for the jugular.
349
00:14:12,100 --> 00:14:12,900
Oh, yeah, yeah.
350
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,300
Whatta ya mean, like
sabotage her?
351
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:16,400
No, go for her jugular.
352
00:14:17,300 --> 00:14:19,600
I mean, you can't
sell chili
353
00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:21,700
when her throat's
all ripped out.
354
00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:24,700
Well, she could,
but who'd wanna buy it?
355
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:27,700
No, I got it,
I got it.
356
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,800
Let's call the fire
marshal on her, huh?
357
00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:31,800
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no,
358
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:33,100
that'd be below
the belt.
359
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,600
I can't do that.
360
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:36,400
Sam, can I talk to you a minute?
361
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:38,700
You know, I
just realized
362
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,700
that the closer I'm
getting to my goal,
363
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,700
the more all I'm thinking
about is winning,
364
00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:44,100
and that's not right.
365
00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:45,800
I mean, I wasn't even
considering your feelings.
366
00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:48,000
You've had that poolroom
for many, many years
367
00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:50,200
and, well, I guess what
I'm trying to say is...
368
00:14:50,300 --> 00:14:52,500
(singsongy):
Ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha!
369
00:14:52,500 --> 00:14:56,900
I'm gonna win
your poolroom!
370
00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:01,900
Call the fire marshal!
371
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:10,000
Glad that dinner rush is over.
372
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,300
Give me time to
put up a new pot
373
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:14,700
before the after-theatre
crowd gets here.
374
00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:16,800
Sam, I'm takin'
a break.
375
00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:18,000
Me, too, Sammy.
376
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,000
I'm down to the last notch
on my belt.
377
00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:22,500
Yeah, I had to make a
new one with a nail.
378
00:15:24,300 --> 00:15:26,600
Hey, Cliff, you got somethin'
in the mail.
379
00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:28,300
Huh?
That reminds me.
380
00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:29,800
Did I ever take you out back
381
00:15:29,900 --> 00:15:32,100
and kick the hell out of you
for that postal increase?
382
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,400
Uh-huh.
383
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:34,200
Good.
384
00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:36,100
Just goin' over my checklist.
385
00:15:36,100 --> 00:15:38,300
Well, look at this!
386
00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:41,900
It's a reply from my
Weathergirl Dorothy.
387
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,200
Oh, look at that,
the sweetheart.
388
00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:45,800
She sent a little photo
of herself.
389
00:15:45,900 --> 00:15:47,300
No, no, no, Cliffie,
390
00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:48,600
I believe that's
a satellite photo
391
00:15:48,700 --> 00:15:51,600
of the entire
Eastern Seaboard.
392
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:53,600
Oh, yeah,
but she's in there.
393
00:15:53,700 --> 00:15:55,600
I mean, I'm in there.
394
00:15:55,700 --> 00:15:58,200
We're all in there.
395
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:00,500
The letter says,
"Dear Cliff,
396
00:16:00,500 --> 00:16:02,500
"Thank you so much for
your sweet letter.
397
00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:04,200
"You did not mention
what grade you're in,
398
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:05,600
"but from the handwriting
I guess
399
00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:09,100
"that you're a big
boy of 11 or 12.
400
00:16:09,100 --> 00:16:11,100
"Maybe when you
grow up,
401
00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:12,500
"you can be a
weatherperson, too.
402
00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:15,300
Yours truly,
Dorothy Borsik."
403
00:16:16,700 --> 00:16:18,500
CARLA (whispers):
Sammy, the
fire marshal.
404
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:19,900
Sam,
405
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,000
we got a tip that Cheers
is operating a kitchen
406
00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:23,700
without a permit.
407
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,700
Anything to that?
408
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,400
Oh, gosh no.
409
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:29,500
I don't think anything that
would concern you, you know,
410
00:16:29,500 --> 00:16:32,000
just a couple
of exposed propane tanks,
411
00:16:32,100 --> 00:16:33,700
unventilated
hot plate.
412
00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:35,600
I mean, but that...
oh, now wait a second.
413
00:16:35,700 --> 00:16:38,600
Gee, that's a,
that's a potential fire hazard.
414
00:16:38,700 --> 00:16:40,600
And you, you're a fire marshal.
415
00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,200
What was I thinking?
416
00:16:43,700 --> 00:16:45,800
I think I'll just
take a look-see.
417
00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:51,900
Maybe I shouldn't have called
the fire department.
418
00:16:51,900 --> 00:16:53,200
Maybe that was wrong.
419
00:16:53,300 --> 00:16:54,700
Don't chicken out
now, Sam.
420
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:56,500
No, no, no,
maybe I shoulda...
421
00:16:56,500 --> 00:16:58,800
put a mouse in the
chili and called the
health department.
422
00:16:58,900 --> 00:17:00,200
That would have
been funnier.
423
00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:02,300
(laughing)
424
00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:03,600
Sam,
425
00:17:03,700 --> 00:17:04,700
you should
426
00:17:04,700 --> 00:17:05,900
be ashamed of yourself.
427
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:07,400
Do you realize
428
00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:09,200
everything that Rebecca has
attempted in her life
429
00:17:09,300 --> 00:17:11,000
has resulted in failure?
430
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:11,700
Yeah.
431
00:17:11,900 --> 00:17:13,200
This is her first
432
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:15,700
success, and you're trying
to take it away from her.
433
00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:17,200
That's my poolroom!
434
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:18,400
But it's her life.
435
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:19,600
But it's my poolroom.
436
00:17:21,100 --> 00:17:23,000
Come on, you guys, understand
that, don't ya?
437
00:17:23,100 --> 00:17:25,000
Yeah, Sam, we
understand.
438
00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:27,600
We understand you made a fair
bet, you saw that you
439
00:17:27,700 --> 00:17:29,300
were gonna lose,
and you started cheatin'.
440
00:17:30,700 --> 00:17:32,700
Well, I-I-I didn't want
to be a bad sport.
441
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:36,600
I just wanted to do anything
I had to to win.
442
00:17:36,700 --> 00:17:39,600
But that's no reason
for you to be a cheater.
443
00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:41,800
But you were the one
who told me to cheat!
444
00:17:41,900 --> 00:17:44,000
No, I said
to kill her.
445
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,500
Cheating's wrong.
446
00:17:50,300 --> 00:17:51,500
I'm, I'm sorry.
447
00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:53,700
What, do you all hate me now?
Is that...?
448
00:17:53,700 --> 00:17:55,500
Well, kinda, yeah.
449
00:17:57,500 --> 00:17:59,800
I'm afraid that's some
list, Miss Howe.
450
00:17:59,900 --> 00:18:00,900
NORM:
Great,
451
00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:02,600
now he's writin' her up
a citation.
452
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:05,400
So it's beans,
tomato paste,
453
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:08,200
onions, peppers
and ground beef.
454
00:18:08,300 --> 00:18:09,900
No, that's ground chuck.
455
00:18:09,900 --> 00:18:12,900
Oh, ground chuck.
456
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:16,800
Serves eight?
Uh-huh.
457
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:18,900
What're you gonna do,
share with the other guys
458
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,500
at the firehouse?
Why should I?
459
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,500
What have they ever
done for me?
460
00:18:24,300 --> 00:18:25,900
Sam,
461
00:18:25,900 --> 00:18:27,500
why do you suppose
462
00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:29,500
the fire marshal would
come by my chili room
463
00:18:29,500 --> 00:18:31,200
tonight, of
all nights?
464
00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:34,500
Kismet?
465
00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:36,800
No, because you
tipped him off.
466
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:39,100
Sam, you could've
gotten me shut down.
467
00:18:39,100 --> 00:18:42,800
Thank God that dear
man loves his chili.
468
00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:43,800
I'm sorry.
469
00:18:43,900 --> 00:18:45,100
I got carried away.
470
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:46,300
Yes, you did.
471
00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:48,300
Listen, I, I gotta
make this up to you.
472
00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:50,800
How, how, how, how
close are you
473
00:18:50,900 --> 00:18:52,600
to getting that $500?
474
00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:53,700
About $20.
475
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:54,600
I'll tell you what.
476
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:55,800
Let me, let me, uh,
477
00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:58,500
buy a bowl of
chili for $20.
No.
478
00:18:58,500 --> 00:19:00,000
No, Sam, you don't
need to do that.
479
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,000
No, listen, I wanna prove to you
that I'm not a poor loser.
480
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,100
Come on, give me
481
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:03,800
my bowl of chili here.
482
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,300
Thank you, Sam,
this is nice of you.
483
00:19:06,300 --> 00:19:08,500
Go ahead,
just put on Woody's hat
484
00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:09,700
and get the chili yourself
485
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,700
because I want to get
my camera and get a picture
486
00:19:11,700 --> 00:19:13,000
of you pouring
that bowl
487
00:19:13,100 --> 00:19:14,600
of chili that put me
over the top.
488
00:19:14,700 --> 00:19:16,100
Oh, you got
to warm it up, Sam.
489
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:17,800
You know how to
turn on the flame?
490
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:18,800
It's kind of tricky.
491
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:20,600
Yeah, I'll
figure it out.
492
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:26,000
(loud explosion)
493
00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:29,100
Yep, that's how I
figured it out, too.
494
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:44,300
It was a accident.
495
00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:48,300
Sammy, are you okay?
496
00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:51,300
You ever had a pot of chili fly
by your face
497
00:19:51,300 --> 00:19:53,000
at the speed of light?
498
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:54,200
No.
499
00:19:54,300 --> 00:19:56,400
Don't.
500
00:19:56,500 --> 00:19:59,300
Look at the hole
in that wall.
501
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:00,800
Who could miss it, huh?
502
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:02,000
No, I'm talking
about the brick wall
503
00:20:02,100 --> 00:20:04,600
across the alley.
504
00:20:04,700 --> 00:20:06,900
Man, that pressure cooker
really wanted out of here.
505
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,900
Okay, everybody
out of here, out.
506
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,400
Come on,
everybody, out!
507
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:13,900
Go back to the bar,
please.
508
00:20:13,900 --> 00:20:16,200
Not you.
509
00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,700
I want to talk to you.
510
00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:23,500
Don't you think maybe I should
go to a trauma center first?
511
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:26,000
S-Some of this
could be me.
512
00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,800
Oh, come on, I know what
you're thinking here,
513
00:20:30,900 --> 00:20:32,800
but I-I didn't do
this on purpose.
514
00:20:32,900 --> 00:20:35,700
I swear to God I didn't
do it on purpose.
515
00:20:35,700 --> 00:20:37,200
You did it just because
I started doing really well
516
00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:38,300
back here and you're jealous.
517
00:20:38,300 --> 00:20:40,200
Y-You're just a big baby.
518
00:20:40,300 --> 00:20:42,000
I am not.
Yes, you are.
519
00:20:42,100 --> 00:20:44,500
You want everything for you
and nothing for me.
520
00:20:44,500 --> 00:20:47,400
Well, yeah, if that's being
a big baby, okay,
521
00:20:47,500 --> 00:20:49,300
but... but I'm a,
522
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:50,100
I'm a guy.
523
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,500
I'm supposed
to be a big baby.
524
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:53,600
And you're a woman.
525
00:20:53,700 --> 00:20:55,700
You know, you're supposed
to be like a nice mommy
526
00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:59,200
and tell me everything's okay
and, and pat me on the head.
527
00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:03,900
I would like to pat you
on the head with a pickax.
528
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,300
Oh, I, I know how you feel.
529
00:21:05,400 --> 00:21:06,300
I mean,
530
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:07,300
I'm sorry.
531
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,100
This is crazy, I...
532
00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:11,300
I feel so sorry.
533
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:12,800
No, you don't.
534
00:21:12,800 --> 00:21:14,200
Yes, I do, I really do.
535
00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:15,300
I just feel terrible.
536
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,700
I... feel like I could cry.
537
00:21:18,700 --> 00:21:21,600
Okay.
538
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,000
Okay what?
539
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:25,800
Cry.
540
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,100
What do you mean?
541
00:21:28,200 --> 00:21:30,800
I mean, make water come
out of your eyes.
542
00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:34,200
And that way I will know
that you are really sorry
543
00:21:34,300 --> 00:21:36,200
for what you've done here.
544
00:21:37,100 --> 00:21:39,900
Just cry?
545
00:21:39,900 --> 00:21:40,600
Yep.
546
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:55,200
Does it count if, you know,
547
00:21:55,300 --> 00:21:57,400
if you really want to cry,
but you can't?
548
00:21:57,500 --> 00:21:58,500
No.
549
00:21:58,500 --> 00:21:59,800
Cry, Sam.
550
00:21:59,900 --> 00:22:00,900
Huh.
551
00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:03,900
(mock sobbing)
552
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,300
No onions.
553
00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:10,000
I want real tears.
Now, just cry.
554
00:22:10,100 --> 00:22:11,800
Give me a break.
What am I supposed to--?
555
00:22:11,900 --> 00:22:12,900
I mean, isn't this enough?
556
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,300
A guy, a guy
who can't cry?
557
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:16,700
I mean, that is
heartbreaking.
558
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:20,100
Honey, there's nothing sadder
than a man who can't cry.
559
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:21,500
No, Sam.
560
00:22:21,500 --> 00:22:22,700
It is not enough.
561
00:22:24,100 --> 00:22:27,500
Wait, maybe I can
help you out here.
562
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:38,100
(glass breaking)
563
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:39,400
(footsteps
approaching)
564
00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:41,200
There.
565
00:22:41,300 --> 00:22:42,800
Now we can go.
566
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:45,100
Come on.
567
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,100
What was that sound?
568
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:47,300
Oh, that was the sound
569
00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:49,700
of me breaking all the windows
out of your Corvette.
570
00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:51,500
(Sam sobbing)
571
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:54,200
REBECCA:
There, now there
are those tears.
39383
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