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♪♪
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Gretta: [gasps]
Is that the circus?
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Dwight: Termites.
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00:00:09,543 --> 00:00:10,744
Gretta: Huh?
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00:00:10,745 --> 00:00:15,482
Nana: It's so nice of you two
to let us stay a few days.
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00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:17,751
Baldric: It is our duty
to give refuge to our subjects
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should they come
under attack.
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Chlodwig: The circus is
in town.
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[laughs] I love the circus!
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00:00:24,392 --> 00:00:25,258
Dwight: Oh, no, no.
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It's a fumigation tent.
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00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:27,427
Sorry, buddy.
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00:00:27,428 --> 00:00:28,461
Gretta: Sir Dwight's house
has been invaded
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by legions of termites.
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00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:31,264
Dwight: True.
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Gretta: And the circus has
come to vanquish them.
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- False.
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- Glory to the brave.
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[triumphant music]
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[theme music]
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Dwight: Okay, so about
a thousand years ago,
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there was this princess, Gretta.
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And she was in big trouble,
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because she had lots
of enemies
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and not a lot of friends.
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So her court magician,
Baldric cast the champion spell.
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It put everyone in the woods
to sleep
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until a champion would come,
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00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,292
break the spell
with his kiss,
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and deal with
Gretta's big, scary enemies.
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But that guy never showed up.
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Instead...
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Ah!
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[kissing noise]
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they got me.
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Ah!
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♪♪
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Ow!
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♪♪
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♪♪
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[whirring]
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Dwight: Thanks for dinner, guys.
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You know,
I'm not usually a parsnip guy,
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but these were great.
45
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Baldric: It was
my grandmother's recipe.
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- What is this concoction?
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Nana: Oh, we call it,
movin' and groovin' juice.
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Dwight: No, no, we don't,
actually.
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Not anymore.
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00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,713
Nana: Four ounces
of this stuff every night,
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keeps things nice and loose.
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It's mostly juiced prunes--
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Dwight: Baldric!
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I would love to get
that parsnip recipe.
55
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:05,725
Baldric: Ah, it's parsnips.
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00:02:05,726 --> 00:02:08,595
Nana: Dwight used
to get stopped up for days.
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Baldric: Ew.
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Nana: And when I say days,
I mean weeks.
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I mean sometimes
it would get so bad
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00:02:13,501 --> 00:02:15,235
that I would just
have to make like--
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Dwight: About tomorrow,
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I'm gonna email you
those slides before bed.
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- Oh, okay, great.
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Dwight: Am I before
or after bunko?
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Nana: After.
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00:02:25,246 --> 00:02:27,580
So you can take
as long as you want.
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The ladies can't get enough
of you, sweetpea.
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Chlodwig: Ladies?
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- Oh. At the senior ladies
luncheon.
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Dwight's doing
a lecture series
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on understanding your grandkids.
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What's your topic tomorrow?
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- Texting with teens.
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Nana: I'll meet you there, okay?
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Dwight: Yeah, you got it.
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Nana: Okay, you night owls.
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I am going to get ready
for bed.
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- Mm.
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Nana: Mm.
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00:02:56,377 --> 00:02:58,645
Down the hatch, honeybear.
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You don't want any slowdowns
tomorrow.
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Um.
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Night.
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[dribbles]
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Nana: All set down here?
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- Yeah, yeah.
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Got my air mattress,
my sleeping bag.
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I'm all good.
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00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:24,871
- All righty then,
good night roomies.
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00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:28,207
Baldric: Good night, dear lady.
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Gretta: May your frail bones
find rest under our roof.
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Nana: Oh. I'm sure.
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Chlodwig: And may the circus
soon be victorious!
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- [grunts]
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[gulping]
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Dwight: You might want
to slow down on that, buddy.
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00:03:41,622 --> 00:03:43,590
It's gonna hit you
pretty hard tomorrow.
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- Ah. 'Tis a hearty brew.
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[small motor running]
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Gretta: Huh.
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Chlodwig: So, Sir Dwight,
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tomorrow is a momentous day
for us both.
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Dwight: Oh, yeah?
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Chlodwig: You give your oration
to the leading ladies
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of the village
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and I escape the grasp
of Hexela, the witch.
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00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:20,994
- Hexela?
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00:04:20,995 --> 00:04:22,629
The witch?
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The grasp?
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- Indeed.
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Dwight: Well, send.
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Gretta: Well, what have you
to do with Hexela?
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- We share an enthusiasm
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00:04:31,305 --> 00:04:32,772
for knucklebones.
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00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:33,906
- Oh.
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- No.
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Dwight: What's knucklebones?
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- A game of chance.
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- Hexela is unbeatable
at knucklebones.
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00:04:40,414 --> 00:04:42,749
Chlodwig: Oh fluffy stuff,
she's hardly unbeatable.
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- You beat her?
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- Well, not yet.
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00:04:45,919 --> 00:04:47,587
But I'm learning
her weaknesses
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and deciphering her strategy.
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- How much have you lost?
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- Two hundred crowns.
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Baldric: Two, uh?
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Dwight: What are you?
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Hey!
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Look, that's my dinner
for tomorrow!
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Chlodwig: How so?
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00:05:03,604 --> 00:05:04,771
Dwight: I wrote my name on it.
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00:05:04,772 --> 00:05:05,805
Chlodwig: Did you?
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- You had to take
my name off of it to eat it.
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Baldric: Is your brain addled?
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What is the first thing
I taught you, Highness.
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- Oh.
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00:05:13,647 --> 00:05:15,415
Never bring a dagger
to an ax fight.
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00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:16,783
Baldric: Mm.
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00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,451
Never owe a debt to a w...
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- Witch.
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Gretta and Baldric:
A witch, yes.
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Chlodwig: Have no fear,
for I have a foolproof plan.
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- [moans]
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- Does it start with
making me more noodle salad?
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Chlodwig: I have challenged
Dalibor the Destroyer
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to a wrestling match.
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- Dalibor?
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00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,132
- The destroyer?
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00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:34,600
- He'll destroy you.
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00:05:34,601 --> 00:05:35,601
- I think not.
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00:05:35,602 --> 00:05:36,569
Baldric: [doubtful noise]
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Chlodwig: And to the victor
of the match,
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goes a purse of 200 crowns.
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00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:40,306
- Mm.
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00:05:40,307 --> 00:05:41,107
- Brilliant, no?
157
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:42,275
Baldric and Gretta: No!
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00:05:42,276 --> 00:05:44,343
Chlodwig: I shall win the match,
pay the witch
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00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:47,346
and live happily ever after.
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- Hm.
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00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:51,117
Baldric: A perfect plan
for a perfect fool.
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Chlodwig: [snoring]
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00:06:03,330 --> 00:06:05,364
- Unbelievable.
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00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:09,969
[crickets chirping]
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00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:13,106
[dogs barking]
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00:06:13,107 --> 00:06:15,908
[quiet footsteps]
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00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:19,278
[bell rings loudly]
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00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:25,918
- Ten o'clock and all is well!
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[grunts]
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- Baldric?
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Chlodwig: [snoring]
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Dwight: [sighs]
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[bell rings loudly]
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- Ah!
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00:06:39,700 --> 00:06:42,668
- Eleven o'clock
and all is well!
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Chlodwig: [snores]
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Dwight: [sighs]
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[bell rings loudly]
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- Twelve o'clock
and all is well.
180
00:07:01,488 --> 00:07:03,623
[bell rings]
181
00:07:03,624 --> 00:07:06,659
[faint magical sound]
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00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:14,167
Baldric: [yawns]
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[bell rings]
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- What died in my mouth?
185
00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:36,923
Uh, ew.
186
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:37,423
What?
187
00:07:37,424 --> 00:07:39,625
What the?
188
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Chlodwig!
189
00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:43,229
- [snorts] Uh, oh.
190
00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:46,232
- Aaaaah!
191
00:07:52,505 --> 00:07:54,407
- Ah, floof.
192
00:07:54,408 --> 00:07:55,608
[ax thwacks]
193
00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:56,108
- Hm.
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00:07:56,109 --> 00:07:56,442
Chlodwig: Gretta!
195
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:57,176
Baldric!
196
00:07:57,177 --> 00:07:57,877
Look everyone!
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00:07:57,878 --> 00:07:58,511
Scramble the jets!
198
00:07:58,512 --> 00:07:59,345
Call the BBC!
199
00:07:59,346 --> 00:08:00,479
Dwight: All useless efforts,
brother.
200
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,215
Give me but a moment
to explain!
201
00:08:02,216 --> 00:08:02,782
Chlodwig: No!
202
00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:03,783
No, no, no, no, no.
203
00:08:03,784 --> 00:08:05,484
I do not want to hear a word out
of your mouth.
204
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,819
Um, my mouth.
205
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,187
Don't use my mouth!
206
00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:09,822
Baldric: Cease
your caterwauling.
207
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,859
Chlodwig: Oh, I am going
to caterwaul my brains out.
208
00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:15,661
You have never seen
caterwauling.
209
00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:16,629
- What's amiss?
210
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,364
Baldric: Prince Chlodwig
is caterwauling.
211
00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:20,132
- Today must be
my birthday.
212
00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:21,734
Gretta: Happy birthday,
Sir Dwight.
213
00:08:21,735 --> 00:08:22,501
Chlodwig: Over here!
214
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,202
I'm Sir Dwight.
215
00:08:23,203 --> 00:08:24,470
- In what sense?
216
00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:28,040
Chlodwig: The sense that I am
Sir Dwight in that dude's body.
217
00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:29,976
Dwight: I clearly lost track
of the date,
218
00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:30,509
Chlodwig: Waa!
219
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:31,644
Dwight: but how?
220
00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,746
According to my runic calendar
my birthday should fall
221
00:08:33,747 --> 00:08:35,581
on the second day
of the sixth new moon
222
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:37,316
in the year of Arloc.
223
00:08:37,317 --> 00:08:39,018
Chlodwig: Dude,
I'm not a violent person
224
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,120
but I think I might actually
punch you in the face.
225
00:08:41,121 --> 00:08:44,290
Dwight: Only consider,
brother, it's your face.
226
00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:45,258
Chlodwig: [small grunt]
227
00:08:45,259 --> 00:08:46,425
- Have you any idea
what is happening here?
228
00:08:46,426 --> 00:08:47,860
Baldric: None, Your Highness.
229
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:49,695
Dwight: Allow me to explain.
230
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:50,963
On the day of my birth,
231
00:08:50,964 --> 00:08:54,367
I came under a wizard's curse
that has plagued me ever since.
232
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:55,735
Every year on my birthday,
233
00:08:55,736 --> 00:08:58,137
I live a day
in someone else's life.
234
00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:00,573
- Oh.
235
00:09:00,574 --> 00:09:02,608
Chlodwig: What a nut job curse!
236
00:09:02,609 --> 00:09:04,977
Dwight: Specifically in the life
of the last person
237
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,445
whom I have wronged.
238
00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:08,781
Gretta: Mm.
239
00:09:08,782 --> 00:09:11,050
Chlodwig: You did eat
my noodle salad, and,
240
00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:13,352
and, you slept
on my air mattress
241
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:15,121
in my sleeping bag.
242
00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:18,624
Dwight: There you have it.
243
00:09:18,625 --> 00:09:20,026
Chlodwig: You know what?
244
00:09:20,027 --> 00:09:21,093
I'm over it.
245
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:22,995
Forgiven and forgotten.
246
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:25,498
Now, I just really need my body
back.
247
00:09:25,499 --> 00:09:28,200
Dwight: It grieves me
to tell you this, Sir Dwight,
248
00:09:28,201 --> 00:09:30,736
but we are trapped
in this predicament
249
00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,571
until midnight tonight.
250
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,106
Chlodwig: No, no, no, no, no.
251
00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:35,942
Look, I've got stuff today.
252
00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:37,009
- As have I.
253
00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:38,744
- The senior ladies
luncheon at 11:00.
254
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:40,947
- How does this luncheon
of senior ladies compare
255
00:09:40,948 --> 00:09:43,416
to my match
with Dalibor?
256
00:09:43,417 --> 00:09:44,717
- Yeah, I'm pretty sure
you're a no-show.
257
00:09:44,718 --> 00:09:46,719
Dwight: Remember when you
face him do not be daunted
258
00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,188
by his immense size.
259
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:53,192
Chlodwig: Chlodwig, I am not
fighting Dalibor the Desolator.
260
00:09:53,193 --> 00:09:55,261
Dwight:
Dalibor the Destroyer.
261
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:56,095
- Not doing it.
262
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,763
- But it's the match
of the century.
263
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,899
The bandit's will never allow me
to renege.
264
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,901
Chlodwig:
The bandits can eat it.
265
00:10:01,902 --> 00:10:02,535
What are they gonna do?
266
00:10:02,536 --> 00:10:03,602
[yelling]
267
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:06,372
Gretta: Dwight! Dwight!
268
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:07,573
I'm coming!
269
00:10:07,574 --> 00:10:08,474
Baldric: Unhand him!
270
00:10:08,475 --> 00:10:12,011
Gretta: You stay with, with,
Chlodwig.
271
00:10:12,012 --> 00:10:12,611
- Right.
272
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,581
- Stout heart, Sir Dwight!
273
00:10:15,582 --> 00:10:17,249
All my hopes go
with him, Baldric.
274
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:18,551
He cannot fail.
275
00:10:18,552 --> 00:10:19,885
He will not fail.
276
00:10:19,886 --> 00:10:22,355
- He certainly can,
and most likely will.
277
00:10:22,356 --> 00:10:24,123
Dwight: I will not fail him.
278
00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:25,992
We must ready ourselves
and be off.
279
00:10:25,993 --> 00:10:26,692
- Whither?
280
00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:29,762
- To the senior ladies luncheon.
281
00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:31,897
- Oh.
282
00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:32,665
[sarcastic] Huzzah.
283
00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:46,879
♪♪
284
00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:56,055
♪♪
285
00:10:56,056 --> 00:11:03,029
[Bandits laughing]
286
00:11:03,030 --> 00:11:04,897
- I swear, if another
bandit puts me in another bag,
287
00:11:04,898 --> 00:11:06,232
whoa.
288
00:11:06,233 --> 00:11:07,900
Bandit: Behold the challenger!
289
00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:09,702
[crowd cheers]
290
00:11:09,703 --> 00:11:13,539
Bandit: Prince Chlodwig...
the Unstable.
291
00:11:13,540 --> 00:11:17,376
[crowd shouts
in appreciation]
292
00:11:22,581 --> 00:11:24,283
Chlodwig: Uh, hi.
293
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:27,753
Is there any way we can push
this thing to tomorrow?
294
00:11:27,754 --> 00:11:30,289
- That's not Dalibor
the Destroyer.
295
00:11:30,290 --> 00:11:30,956
- Huh?
296
00:11:30,957 --> 00:11:34,193
- That's his spear carrier.
297
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:35,528
[crowd cheers]
298
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:36,562
Gretta: This is--
299
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:37,363
- I know.
300
00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:39,165
Bandit: Dalibor the Destroyer!
301
00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:43,569
[crowd cheering]
302
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:46,672
Dalibor: [very gruff]
I destroy you.
303
00:11:46,673 --> 00:11:48,474
- I, I'm sure you will.
304
00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:50,009
Dalibor: [growls]
305
00:11:50,010 --> 00:11:52,211
- [whimpers] I'm gonna die!
306
00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:54,413
If I die, who dies,
me or Chlodwig?
307
00:11:54,414 --> 00:11:55,614
Gretta: Have courage,
Sir Dwight.
308
00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:56,115
[punch]
309
00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:56,615
Chlodwig: Ow.
310
00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:57,450
- Show no fear.
311
00:11:57,451 --> 00:11:58,317
Chlodwig: You show no fear,
312
00:11:58,318 --> 00:11:59,251
you're not the one
313
00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:01,187
who has to battle
Dalavor the Destructor!
314
00:12:01,188 --> 00:12:03,022
Gretta: Dalibor the Destroyer.
315
00:12:03,023 --> 00:12:07,426
Chlodwig: Whatever that ton
of big, hairy man.
316
00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:08,794
You're not fighting him.
317
00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:13,432
- Well, nor you.
318
00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,434
You must escape.
319
00:12:15,435 --> 00:12:17,336
Chlodwig: Good idea.
320
00:12:17,337 --> 00:12:18,938
Gretta: Behave naturally.
321
00:12:18,939 --> 00:12:24,510
- Copy that.
322
00:12:24,511 --> 00:12:26,846
Ew.
323
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:28,047
What are you--
324
00:12:28,048 --> 00:12:28,714
Gretta!
325
00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:30,116
- I will create a diversion.
326
00:12:30,117 --> 00:12:31,350
Chlodwig: What diversion?
327
00:12:31,351 --> 00:12:32,251
Uh.
328
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:34,820
- I'm thinking.
329
00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:40,559
Chlodwig: Uh, Gretta?
330
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,528
Gretta: Hail, fellows!
331
00:12:42,529 --> 00:12:46,398
Would you like to see
some magic?
332
00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:47,266
Dalibor: [growls]
333
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:50,569
Gretta: Behold
I shall remove my thumb
334
00:12:50,570 --> 00:12:55,975
from my own hand.
335
00:12:55,976 --> 00:12:59,111
[crowd ohs]
336
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:01,213
Man: Is she a witch?
337
00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:02,047
Dalibor: Ah.
338
00:13:02,048 --> 00:13:02,748
Bandit: Fight!
339
00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:07,219
[rock music]
340
00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:13,192
♪♪
341
00:13:13,193 --> 00:13:18,164
♪♪
342
00:13:18,165 --> 00:13:33,112
♪♪
343
00:13:33,113 --> 00:13:34,046
♪♪
344
00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:38,017
Dalibor: [roaring]
345
00:13:38,018 --> 00:13:41,353
[thud]
346
00:13:41,354 --> 00:13:45,524
Gretta: Dwight! Dwight!
347
00:13:45,525 --> 00:13:48,460
Dwight. Dwight.
348
00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:50,029
Chlodwig: Is it over?
349
00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:51,630
- You lost.
350
00:13:51,631 --> 00:13:53,132
- That's fine with me.
351
00:13:53,133 --> 00:14:02,074
[old-fashioned music]
352
00:14:02,075 --> 00:14:03,909
Dwight: Ladies!
353
00:14:03,910 --> 00:14:06,512
Your wait is over.
354
00:14:06,513 --> 00:14:09,014
Nana: Dwight, there you are.
355
00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:10,516
And Baldric?
356
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:13,118
Uh, so nice of you to join
the ladies luncheon, I--
357
00:14:13,119 --> 00:14:16,288
Baldric: I shall explain all.
358
00:14:16,289 --> 00:14:17,756
Ladies.
359
00:14:17,757 --> 00:14:21,527
- Bewitched.
360
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:23,095
Captivated.
361
00:14:23,096 --> 00:14:24,196
Nana: Uh.
362
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:26,265
Oh, uh, Dwight, honey.
363
00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:28,567
Uh, how 'bout we get started.
364
00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:30,035
- Mm, yeah.
365
00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:32,304
Nana: Um, texting with teens.
366
00:14:32,305 --> 00:14:33,105
Dwight: Ah, yes.
367
00:14:33,106 --> 00:14:35,274
My oration.
368
00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:37,509
Nana: Uh, sure thing, uh,
369
00:14:37,510 --> 00:14:38,777
I'll run the slides.
370
00:14:38,778 --> 00:14:42,214
Dwight: My youth was one
of privilege but isolation.
371
00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:45,584
A wilderness of the soul.
372
00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:46,685
[cheering]
373
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:48,220
Gretta: You were a great sport.
374
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,955
You know that?
375
00:14:49,956 --> 00:14:51,890
I am proud of you.
376
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:58,397
Hexela: How now,
Prince Chlodwig?
377
00:14:58,398 --> 00:14:59,665
Gretta: Hexela.
378
00:14:59,666 --> 00:15:01,834
- You owe me 200 crowns.
379
00:15:01,835 --> 00:15:05,771
A debt you swore you'd pay
by sunset.
380
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,773
Gretta: What's the first thing
you need to know?
381
00:15:07,774 --> 00:15:10,376
Chlodwig: Never wrestle a guy
who's last name is Destroyer.
382
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:12,344
Gretta: Never owe a debt
to a witch.
383
00:15:12,345 --> 00:15:13,479
- Mm.
384
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:14,880
Chlodwig: Tell you what Hexela,
385
00:15:14,881 --> 00:15:17,149
Chlodwig will pay you
tomorrow first thing.
386
00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:19,885
Gretta: A word in your ear,
Prince Chlodwig.
387
00:15:19,886 --> 00:15:21,987
She mustn't know that
you aren't Chlodwig.
388
00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:23,022
Chlodwig: Why not?
389
00:15:23,023 --> 00:15:24,356
Gretta: Because
this is a witch's debt
390
00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:25,324
and it must be paid
391
00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:26,392
on the promised time
and it may only be paid
392
00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:27,393
by Chlodwig.
393
00:15:27,394 --> 00:15:28,727
Chlodwig: If he doesn't?
394
00:15:28,728 --> 00:15:30,329
Gretta: I shudder to think.
395
00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:32,031
[shuddering noise]
396
00:15:32,032 --> 00:15:34,366
Chlodwig: Sorry,
you were saying?
397
00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:37,403
- I'm generally known
as a reasonable woman.
398
00:15:37,404 --> 00:15:40,873
- By whom?
399
00:15:40,874 --> 00:15:44,109
- And since I do enjoy
a good game of knucklebones,
400
00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:45,344
I propose we play.
401
00:15:45,345 --> 00:15:48,280
If you win,
your debt is forgiven.
402
00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:49,715
- What if I don't?
403
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:50,582
- [small laugh]
404
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:51,750
- He doesn't have
any money, Hexela.
405
00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:54,687
You can't draw blood
from a turnip.
406
00:15:54,688 --> 00:15:58,157
- Maybe you can't.
407
00:15:58,158 --> 00:16:00,192
But in answer
to your question,
408
00:16:00,193 --> 00:16:07,666
I might be willing to accept
payment of another sort.
409
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:09,902
Chlodwig: What sort?
410
00:16:09,903 --> 00:16:11,970
Hexela: Hm.
411
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:16,241
Let me think, perhaps,
412
00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:17,576
your earlobes!
413
00:16:17,577 --> 00:16:19,345
Chlodwig: Why do you want
my earlobes?
414
00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:21,680
Hexela: Let's just say
a prince's earlobes are
415
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:23,816
handy little things.
416
00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:24,216
[slap]
417
00:16:24,217 --> 00:16:25,050
Hexela: Ah!
418
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:27,386
- And if we refuse
your proposal?
419
00:16:27,387 --> 00:16:30,255
- Well then I shall
simply have to recoup my losses
420
00:16:30,256 --> 00:16:31,690
in some other way.
421
00:16:31,691 --> 00:16:32,558
[gasp]
422
00:16:32,559 --> 00:16:36,195
Perhaps I'll sell you
to the bandits.
423
00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:37,296
Hi boys!
424
00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:38,297
Dolliver.
425
00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:41,333
Call me.
426
00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:43,369
Do come along, children.
427
00:16:43,370 --> 00:16:46,338
[snap]
428
00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:47,506
Chlodwig: Huh. Give me a minute.
429
00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:48,273
[stomach gurgles loudly]
430
00:16:48,274 --> 00:16:49,975
- What's amiss?
431
00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:52,978
Chlodwig:
I am movin' and groovin'
432
00:16:52,979 --> 00:16:53,612
[stomach grumbling]
433
00:16:53,613 --> 00:16:55,814
Excuse me.
434
00:16:55,815 --> 00:16:58,417
Dwight: My dearest friends
were the shadow puppets
435
00:16:58,418 --> 00:17:00,319
I created on the walls
of my private quarters.
436
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:05,290
- Uh.
437
00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:09,161
- Yes. I see.
438
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:13,065
This is a random assembly
of letters.
439
00:17:13,066 --> 00:17:15,401
It is the nonsense babbled
by lunatics.
440
00:17:15,402 --> 00:17:16,735
Pay it no heed.
441
00:17:16,736 --> 00:17:19,238
Nana: Oh! I know this one!
442
00:17:19,239 --> 00:17:22,508
I love you, hugs and kisses.
443
00:17:22,509 --> 00:17:24,743
[applause]
444
00:17:24,744 --> 00:17:26,912
- Pardon?
445
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:30,048
- Go ahead.
446
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,251
- Uh.
447
00:17:32,252 --> 00:17:39,324
R-r-rotafool.
448
00:17:39,325 --> 00:17:41,627
A Flemish word, I believe.
449
00:17:41,628 --> 00:17:46,999
Woman 1: Oh, rolling
on the floor laughing.
450
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,700
[applause]
451
00:17:48,701 --> 00:17:52,037
- This ancient woman
is unwell.
452
00:17:52,038 --> 00:17:53,439
Baldric: Ah, I see.
453
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:54,606
Ha, ha.
454
00:17:54,607 --> 00:17:55,874
That is clever.
455
00:17:55,875 --> 00:17:58,477
Each letter represents
a word.
456
00:17:58,478 --> 00:17:59,278
Ha, ha, ha.
457
00:17:59,279 --> 00:18:00,279
Oo, do another one.
458
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:02,181
- Oh!
459
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:04,850
Baldric: [stammering]
460
00:18:04,851 --> 00:18:06,418
Better take waffles!
461
00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:07,252
Ah!
462
00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:08,587
Dwight: Excellent advice.
463
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:11,190
Baldric: Thank you.
464
00:18:11,191 --> 00:18:12,291
- Oh!
465
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,058
[mumbling]
466
00:18:13,059 --> 00:18:15,727
Baldric and Dwight: Ah, ha, ha.
467
00:18:15,728 --> 00:18:16,562
Dwight: Another one.
468
00:18:16,563 --> 00:18:18,964
- Oh, yeah.
469
00:18:18,965 --> 00:18:20,766
Baldric: Um.
470
00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:24,970
Dwight: Uh, uh, uh, br, br
471
00:18:24,971 --> 00:18:27,105
bring roasted beef!
472
00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,106
- Ah yes.
473
00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:28,574
Dwight: Bring roasted beef!
474
00:18:28,575 --> 00:18:29,708
[women laughing]
475
00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:30,742
Dwight: Another! More!
476
00:18:30,743 --> 00:18:33,712
Nana: Ah, here we go.
477
00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:40,185
Dwight and Baldric: W, w, w...
478
00:18:40,186 --> 00:18:42,254
- Wear your winter hat!
479
00:18:42,255 --> 00:18:44,590
[All laughing]
480
00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:45,724
Dwight: My turn, my turn.
481
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:46,525
One more.
482
00:18:46,526 --> 00:18:47,759
Yes.
483
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:48,794
Uh, ling,
484
00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:49,394
ling,
485
00:18:49,395 --> 00:18:49,995
lemur,
486
00:18:49,996 --> 00:18:50,896
lock,
487
00:18:50,897 --> 00:18:56,668
lemon...
488
00:18:56,669 --> 00:19:01,373
Lady of love.
489
00:19:01,374 --> 00:19:02,875
Baldric: No, no,
490
00:19:02,876 --> 00:19:03,809
don't do that.
491
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,544
Stop it.
492
00:19:10,148 --> 00:19:11,783
Hexela: Have a seat my dear.
493
00:19:11,784 --> 00:19:13,218
[clears throat]
494
00:19:13,219 --> 00:19:15,153
We all know the rules.
495
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:16,555
- Let's pretend we don't.
496
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:17,589
Hexela: Pardon?
497
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:19,691
Chlodwig: Just talk me
through it.
498
00:19:19,692 --> 00:19:22,294
I just like the way
you explain things.
499
00:19:22,295 --> 00:19:23,095
- Oh.
500
00:19:23,096 --> 00:19:25,063
Very well then, Your Highness.
501
00:19:25,064 --> 00:19:27,032
We throw the bones.
502
00:19:27,033 --> 00:19:28,166
- What bones?
503
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,368
Hexela: These bones.
504
00:19:29,369 --> 00:19:31,503
[clattering]
505
00:19:31,504 --> 00:19:33,038
Gretta: Each bone has
four sides,
506
00:19:33,039 --> 00:19:34,706
each side has a number.
507
00:19:34,707 --> 00:19:36,675
- I'm sorry,
where are these bones from?
508
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:37,843
- [clears throat]
509
00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:41,113
Are you quite certain
you want to know?
510
00:19:41,114 --> 00:19:42,414
- I'm quite certain
I don't want to know.
511
00:19:42,415 --> 00:19:45,817
- Mm-hm.
512
00:19:45,818 --> 00:19:48,120
Gretta: You each get three turns
to throw the bones.
513
00:19:48,121 --> 00:19:49,221
- Okay.
514
00:19:49,222 --> 00:19:50,389
Gretta: After each turn
your numbers will be added.
515
00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:51,223
- Uh-huh.
516
00:19:51,224 --> 00:19:52,057
- Whoever has
the greatest number
517
00:19:52,058 --> 00:19:54,927
after three rounds, wins.
518
00:19:54,928 --> 00:19:56,862
- Th- that's it?
519
00:19:56,863 --> 00:19:58,931
There's zero skill involved
in this game.
520
00:19:58,932 --> 00:20:00,098
Hexela: [laughs and snorts]
521
00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:03,068
Well, that is a matter
of opinion.
522
00:20:03,069 --> 00:20:05,070
Gretta: Hexela is a master
at knucklebones.
523
00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:05,737
Hexela: Oh!
524
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:07,105
Chlodwig: But it's all luck!
525
00:20:07,106 --> 00:20:08,640
- Well, then let's begin.
526
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:11,443
And see who fortune
will favor today.
527
00:20:11,444 --> 00:20:12,344
[laughs]
528
00:20:12,345 --> 00:20:17,115
[clattering]
529
00:20:17,116 --> 00:20:18,884
Hexela: One, three, three, two.
530
00:20:18,885 --> 00:20:21,587
[clicking]
531
00:20:21,588 --> 00:20:22,354
Not bad.
532
00:20:22,355 --> 00:20:23,188
[rattling]
533
00:20:23,189 --> 00:20:24,656
[blows]
534
00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:26,792
Gretta: Two, one, three, one.
535
00:20:26,793 --> 00:20:27,893
[clicking]
536
00:20:27,894 --> 00:20:30,128
Hexela: Oh, seven for you,
eight for me.
537
00:20:30,129 --> 00:20:31,229
On to round two.
538
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,397
Chlodwig: Wait a second,
539
00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:33,932
my score was one,
three, three, two.
540
00:20:33,933 --> 00:20:38,170
That adds up to nine.
541
00:20:38,171 --> 00:20:39,771
- Not by my calculations, no.
542
00:20:39,772 --> 00:20:44,343
- Your calculations,
your what?
543
00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:45,811
You realize why
544
00:20:45,812 --> 00:20:48,313
she's unbeatable
at knucklebones, right?
545
00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:50,816
- What are you suggesting, sir.
546
00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:52,184
- Math has come a long way
547
00:20:52,185 --> 00:20:53,619
in the last thousand years.
548
00:20:53,620 --> 00:20:56,188
- Ha!
549
00:20:56,189 --> 00:20:57,155
- Do you have your phone?
550
00:20:57,156 --> 00:20:58,724
- I believe so.
551
00:20:58,725 --> 00:20:59,424
Chlodwig:
There's two rounds left
552
00:20:59,425 --> 00:21:00,425
and here's how they're gonna go.
553
00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:04,896
We're gonna use your bones,
my calculator.
554
00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:07,833
- [noise of frustration]
555
00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:11,336
Nana: [singing]
Happy birthday, dear Chlodwig,
556
00:21:11,337 --> 00:21:16,041
in Dwight's body,
happy birthday to you.
557
00:21:16,042 --> 00:21:18,143
[applause]
558
00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:19,011
Chlodwig: Hey guys.
559
00:21:19,012 --> 00:21:23,048
- Blow out your candle.
560
00:21:23,049 --> 00:21:30,155
- [blows very hard]
561
00:21:30,156 --> 00:21:33,325
Now, we feast.
562
00:21:33,326 --> 00:21:35,961
Chlodwig: It's all you,
birthday boy.
563
00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:39,231
- Mm.
564
00:21:39,232 --> 00:21:42,401
I believe this is the first time
I've celebrated my birthday.
565
00:21:42,402 --> 00:21:44,169
Nana: Really?
566
00:21:44,170 --> 00:21:45,337
- What with the wizard's curse,
567
00:21:45,338 --> 00:21:48,774
my birthday's always been
something of a hardship.
568
00:21:48,775 --> 00:21:50,242
Nana: Poor thing.
569
00:21:50,243 --> 00:21:51,910
Dwight: With the exception
of today.
570
00:21:51,911 --> 00:21:53,645
I have not spent a day
in one's life
571
00:21:53,646 --> 00:21:57,783
that I have enjoyed more
than yours, Sir Dwight.
572
00:21:57,784 --> 00:21:59,551
Chlodwig: Thanks, man.
573
00:21:59,552 --> 00:22:00,886
Baldric: Have no fear.
574
00:22:00,887 --> 00:22:02,454
Prince Chlodwig fulfilled
your duty
575
00:22:02,455 --> 00:22:06,992
at the senior ladies luncheon.
576
00:22:06,993 --> 00:22:07,793
- Oh, wow.
577
00:22:07,794 --> 00:22:09,861
Nana: He made quite a splash.
578
00:22:09,862 --> 00:22:10,929
Gretta: Huh.
579
00:22:10,930 --> 00:22:13,031
- I think you have
several dates already lined up.
580
00:22:13,032 --> 00:22:14,166
Dwight: Mm.
581
00:22:14,167 --> 00:22:16,168
What of you, Sir Dwight?
582
00:22:16,169 --> 00:22:17,436
Were you victorious
in your match
583
00:22:17,437 --> 00:22:19,905
with Dalibor the Destroyer?
584
00:22:19,906 --> 00:22:23,075
- He destroyed me.
585
00:22:23,076 --> 00:22:24,476
- No.
586
00:22:24,477 --> 00:22:26,745
- Yeah, sorry dude.
587
00:22:26,746 --> 00:22:28,613
- What of the witch?
588
00:22:28,614 --> 00:22:29,915
My debt.
589
00:22:29,916 --> 00:22:34,219
Gretta: Well, Sir Dwight has
bested Hexela at knucklebones.
590
00:22:34,220 --> 00:22:34,886
Baldric: Ha!
591
00:22:34,887 --> 00:22:37,723
Impossible!
592
00:22:37,724 --> 00:22:39,124
- How?
593
00:22:39,125 --> 00:22:41,293
- What's the first thing
you need to know.
594
00:22:41,294 --> 00:22:43,061
- Never eat
the last lemon fritter
595
00:22:43,062 --> 00:22:44,863
at a dwarf banquet.
596
00:22:44,864 --> 00:22:50,602
Baldric: Mm,
never owe a debt to a witch.
597
00:22:50,603 --> 00:22:53,271
Chlodwig: Never let the witch
do the math.
598
00:22:53,272 --> 00:22:54,372
- Ah!
599
00:22:54,373 --> 00:22:56,007
Dwight: Mm, mm.
600
00:22:56,008 --> 00:22:57,142
[squeak]
601
00:22:57,143 --> 00:23:05,817
♪♪
602
00:23:05,818 --> 00:23:07,719
Baldric: Rouse yourselves,
sluggards!
603
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:11,823
It is a new day.
604
00:23:11,824 --> 00:23:14,025
- Huzzah!
605
00:23:14,026 --> 00:23:18,096
Rejoice fellows,
for I am Chlodwig once more.
606
00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:19,197
Baldric: [laughs]
607
00:23:19,198 --> 00:23:22,000
Dwight: Fluffy stuffs,
there is only one Chlodwig,
608
00:23:22,001 --> 00:23:23,869
and it is I.
609
00:23:23,870 --> 00:23:25,771
Gretta: Uh.
610
00:23:25,772 --> 00:23:28,974
- But, but, but...
611
00:23:28,975 --> 00:23:32,010
Dwight: [laughs] I'm just
messing with you man.
612
00:23:32,011 --> 00:23:33,912
Who wants waffles?
613
00:23:33,913 --> 00:23:35,614
Baldric: Oo, waffles.
614
00:23:35,615 --> 00:23:38,450
- Huh.
615
00:23:38,451 --> 00:23:41,052
Gretta: Perhaps
with some move along juice.
616
00:23:41,053 --> 00:23:42,888
Chlodwig: Most certainly,
617
00:23:42,889 --> 00:23:45,323
we don't want
any slowdowns today.
618
00:23:45,324 --> 00:23:46,324
♪♪
39543
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