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00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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00:00:47,759 --> 00:00:52,996
(Snoring)
4
00:01:21,772 --> 00:01:23,495
(Sighs)
5
00:01:23,596 --> 00:01:29,378
(Police sirens sound
in the distance)
6
00:01:49,513 --> 00:01:54,302
(Car alarm goes off
in the distance)
7
00:01:56,968 --> 00:02:00,644
(Dog barking)
8
00:02:02,759 --> 00:02:08,355
(Lucas' light breathing)
9
00:02:32,356 --> 00:02:34,941
(Honking)
10
00:04:02,426 --> 00:04:05,142
(Alarm clock rings)
11
00:04:14,648 --> 00:04:15,542
("Skip to my Lou" plays)
12
00:05:06,418 --> 00:05:07,247
(Cat meows)
13
00:05:07,346 --> 00:05:08,688
Huh! Hello, Lady.
14
00:05:08,786 --> 00:05:11,273
Edith? You okay in there?
15
00:05:11,378 --> 00:05:13,767
EDITH:
Yes, dear, I'm fine.
16
00:05:13,873 --> 00:05:15,433
Do you need anything
from the store?
17
00:05:15,538 --> 00:05:16,203
Hurry up, guys.
18
00:05:16,305 --> 00:05:17,963
ELIZA: Clara!
You're going to be late for school!
19
00:05:18,065 --> 00:05:18,861
(Lucas giggles)
20
00:05:18,961 --> 00:05:20,368
EDITH:
Orange juice, perhaps.
21
00:05:20,465 --> 00:05:21,741
Does Lady need food?
22
00:05:21,841 --> 00:05:23,215
EDITH:
I don't know.
23
00:05:23,313 --> 00:05:24,905
Okay, well,
I'm closing the door now, Edith.
24
00:05:25,008 --> 00:05:26,088
It's not safe to leave it open.
25
00:05:26,192 --> 00:05:28,102
(To herself)
'Cause I live in a firetrap.
26
00:05:28,208 --> 00:05:28,775
Come on.
27
00:05:28,879 --> 00:05:31,748
It's not a firetrap.
That's a treasure trove.
28
00:05:31,856 --> 00:05:34,922
ELIZA: If stacks of stuff dated from
the '50s count as a treasure trove.
29
00:05:35,023 --> 00:05:36,485
AVERY: Oh, they do.
30
00:05:36,591 --> 00:05:38,980
ELIZA: Avery, you're going to have
to move the car today, remember?
31
00:05:39,086 --> 00:05:39,620
AVERY: Right.
32
00:05:39,727 --> 00:05:41,188
ELIZA: You sit in it with Lucas
and hold our spot...
33
00:05:41,295 --> 00:05:42,505
...and I'll walk Clara over.
- AVERY: Right.
34
00:05:49,869 --> 00:05:51,244
Okay!
35
00:05:51,341 --> 00:05:54,636
Oh... Come on, sweetie.
36
00:05:55,885 --> 00:05:57,859
Careful, guys.
37
00:05:58,092 --> 00:05:59,685
CLARA: Careful, guys.
38
00:05:59,789 --> 00:06:02,309
(Traffic noise)
39
00:06:03,980 --> 00:06:07,046
ELIZA: Didn't I just clean this out
last week?
40
00:06:08,651 --> 00:06:11,520
Hey, check it out.
Look at those books!
41
00:06:11,627 --> 00:06:13,601
Think we can get them
before mom notices?
42
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:14,754
No, Avery, please.
43
00:06:14,858 --> 00:06:17,640
Put your family's best interest first.
Think of the common good.
44
00:06:17,738 --> 00:06:19,396
That's exactly what I'm doing.
45
00:06:19,499 --> 00:06:21,920
LUCAS:
That's exactly what I'm doing.
46
00:06:23,274 --> 00:06:25,346
AVERY:
Okay, in the car we go.
47
00:06:25,450 --> 00:06:26,246
Can I have some?
48
00:06:29,417 --> 00:06:30,082
(Children giggle)
49
00:06:30,185 --> 00:06:32,967
(Sandrine says something
in French)
50
00:06:34,408 --> 00:06:36,863
(Sandrine greets them in French)
51
00:06:36,968 --> 00:06:39,073
I wish I was French, too.
52
00:06:40,136 --> 00:06:42,852
It's my birthday tomorrow.
I'm going to be six!
53
00:06:42,951 --> 00:06:45,155
And I'm having my party
up there tonight!
54
00:06:45,255 --> 00:06:47,776
Really?
In your apartment.
55
00:06:47,879 --> 00:06:51,773
ISABELLA: For my sixth birthday,
we had a private marionette show.
56
00:06:51,879 --> 00:06:54,017
I'm going to have 10 friends!
57
00:06:54,118 --> 00:06:55,525
My seventh
was at the Swedish Cottage.
58
00:06:55,622 --> 00:06:58,272
First, my mom said I could
only have six friends
59
00:06:58,374 --> 00:06:59,715
because I'm going to be six.
60
00:06:59,814 --> 00:07:03,588
Then, Serendipity 3
delivered frozen hot chocolate.
61
00:07:03,685 --> 00:07:06,467
But then, my dad talked her
into letting me have 10.
62
00:07:06,565 --> 00:07:08,932
Afterwards, my friends and I
got carriage rides
63
00:07:09,028 --> 00:07:10,850
in Central Park at sunset.
64
00:07:10,948 --> 00:07:14,144
I'm going to have a triple layer cake,
with purple frosting.
65
00:07:14,244 --> 00:07:17,440
And I'm going to have
really cool goodie bags,
66
00:07:17,540 --> 00:07:19,907
right, Mom?
67
00:07:20,003 --> 00:07:21,345
AVERY:
Not the goodie bags again.
68
00:07:21,443 --> 00:07:23,450
SANDRINE:
Eliza, you are brave.
69
00:07:23,555 --> 00:07:25,595
Really? How so?
70
00:07:25,698 --> 00:07:27,225
Just to live as you do, you know?
71
00:07:27,331 --> 00:07:30,811
The stairs, the children,
the car, the dog.
72
00:07:30,914 --> 00:07:33,053
It's a bit exhausting, no?
73
00:07:33,154 --> 00:07:35,521
Is that your definition of "brave"?
74
00:07:35,618 --> 00:07:39,130
Eliza, could you give me a hand
with this buckle?
75
00:07:39,233 --> 00:07:41,273
Um, Mom, you forgot my backpack,
76
00:07:41,377 --> 00:07:44,126
and I definitely need it
before choice time.
77
00:07:44,224 --> 00:07:45,053
Okay.
78
00:07:45,152 --> 00:07:46,167
SANDRINE:
Eliza, are you...?
79
00:07:46,272 --> 00:07:48,509
Are you wearing your nightgown?
80
00:07:49,856 --> 00:07:52,670
(Music plays)
81
00:08:09,310 --> 00:08:10,651
ELIZA:
Has it really come to this?
82
00:08:10,749 --> 00:08:12,342
That I, Eliza K. Welch,
83
00:08:12,446 --> 00:08:14,682
find myself humiliated
in my nightgown
84
00:08:14,781 --> 00:08:16,723
in front of my neighbour’s
townhouse?
85
00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:19,731
My husband has run Clara
around the corner to P.S. 3,
86
00:08:19,837 --> 00:08:22,204
and I have exactly
nine minutes to write.
87
00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:24,024
How can a mother
articulate her ideas
88
00:08:24,124 --> 00:08:26,579
with anything approaching
wit or conviction
89
00:08:26,684 --> 00:08:29,269
in such ridiculously
tiny wedges of time?
90
00:08:40,538 --> 00:08:41,586
(New message alert)
91
00:08:42,362 --> 00:08:45,591
ELIZA:
Oh, it's Zachs Mommy again.
92
00:08:45,690 --> 00:08:47,577
"Quit complaining, Sancta Mommy!
93
00:08:47,674 --> 00:08:49,845
No one has any time.
94
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:53,687
Save your quest for self-expression
until the kids go off to college. "
95
00:08:53,785 --> 00:08:55,476
(Scoffs)
96
00:08:55,864 --> 00:08:57,936
Must a woman's soul
wither and die
97
00:08:58,040 --> 00:09:00,276
simply because she opted
to become a mother?
98
00:09:00,376 --> 00:09:03,093
I want to finish the laundry
and a complex sentence,
99
00:09:03,191 --> 00:09:04,784
to think tantalizingly
deep thoughts
100
00:09:04,888 --> 00:09:07,571
and throw a magical birthday party
for my daughter.
101
00:09:07,671 --> 00:09:11,632
Is that truly too much to ask?
102
00:09:22,549 --> 00:09:24,916
ELIZA:
Tomorrow, Clara turns six.
103
00:09:25,013 --> 00:09:27,565
She's more than half way
to double digits.
104
00:09:27,669 --> 00:09:31,084
She'll be going to college
in 12 years.
105
00:09:31,188 --> 00:09:34,897
That used to seem
like a long time.
106
00:09:34,996 --> 00:09:38,095
Now I can blink,
and it'd be over.
107
00:09:51,219 --> 00:09:53,935
ELIZA: "Speak your mind and become
our resident Mom-zoologist
108
00:09:54,034 --> 00:09:55,725
with your very own column,
109
00:09:55,826 --> 00:09:58,030
worth up to 3,000 dollars a month!
110
00:09:58,130 --> 00:09:59,788
Runners-up receive
either 1,000 dollars
111
00:09:59,889 --> 00:10:02,791
or an all-expense paid trip
to this year's Mamapalooza,
112
00:10:02,897 --> 00:10:05,515
the festival for moms who rock. "
113
00:10:05,617 --> 00:10:07,046
You've got to be kidding me.
114
00:10:07,152 --> 00:10:11,210
"Just send us 500 words telling us
what motherhood means to you. "
115
00:10:12,208 --> 00:10:14,793
Oh, my God!
116
00:10:14,896 --> 00:10:15,561
It's perfect!
117
00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:19,654
Oh, no.
118
00:10:19,759 --> 00:10:21,581
(Groans)
119
00:10:28,142 --> 00:10:29,124
TOUR GUIDE:
Folks, coming up,
120
00:10:29,230 --> 00:10:34,532
we're going to see the historic former
home of Edna St. Vincent Millay.
121
00:10:34,637 --> 00:10:36,099
But first,
get those cameras ready...
122
00:10:36,205 --> 00:10:36,739
ELIZA: Excuse me.
123
00:10:36,846 --> 00:10:39,114
This is a neighbourhood, people,
not a theme park.
124
00:10:39,213 --> 00:10:39,879
"Get her picture! Get her...!
125
00:10:39,981 --> 00:10:42,828
"Here's the corner we all know
and love from Friends."
126
00:10:42,924 --> 00:10:44,899
Though, whenever you see
an inside shot,
127
00:10:45,004 --> 00:10:48,320
that was actually filmed
on a soundstage in Los Angeles.
128
00:10:48,428 --> 00:10:50,816
WOMAN:
Hurry, kids! Hurry! Come on!
129
00:10:54,315 --> 00:10:56,649
ELIZA:
Hey! Sheila! Sheila!
130
00:10:56,747 --> 00:10:59,398
Hi! What's shaken', babe?
131
00:10:59,498 --> 00:11:01,222
Do I have
Joan Crawford eyebrows?
132
00:11:01,322 --> 00:11:04,072
I applied pencil like it was
magic marker, and I didn't check.
133
00:11:04,170 --> 00:11:05,544
Tell me the truth.
134
00:11:05,642 --> 00:11:07,584
No, they look good.
There, 'ya know, zesty.
135
00:11:07,690 --> 00:11:09,282
Zesty?
136
00:11:09,386 --> 00:11:11,622
I have to have this in Clara's
classroom by choice time,
137
00:11:11,721 --> 00:11:12,833
or it's sudden death
for Bad Mommy.
138
00:11:12,937 --> 00:11:14,530
- Will you walk with me?
- Sure.
139
00:11:16,649 --> 00:11:17,445
SHEILA:
Hey, do you want me
140
00:11:17,545 --> 00:11:19,071
to pick up Clara
and bring her with us?
141
00:11:19,177 --> 00:11:20,486
'Cause I know Trixie
would love it.
142
00:11:20,584 --> 00:11:22,526
But I thought Joel
had the kids on Fridays.
143
00:11:22,632 --> 00:11:23,941
Oh, he's in Santa Fe.
144
00:11:24,039 --> 00:11:26,144
Oh... Chasing another
new wild potter?
145
00:11:26,248 --> 00:11:28,997
I don't know. Maybe.
Who cares?
146
00:11:29,095 --> 00:11:30,786
ELIZA: I've really got to
go for this, right?
147
00:11:30,887 --> 00:11:35,142
I mean, there's something validating
about having a real job, you know?
148
00:11:35,239 --> 00:11:36,351
It's been awhile.
149
00:11:36,455 --> 00:11:40,000
Yeah, there's definitely something
validating about having a real job.
150
00:11:40,103 --> 00:11:42,404
I mean, especially one
that actually pays you more
151
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:44,356
than the childcare
required to do it.
152
00:11:44,453 --> 00:11:46,395
And it has been awhile.
153
00:11:46,501 --> 00:11:47,549
You sure you're ready to move
154
00:11:47,653 --> 00:11:49,147
beyond entourages
of organic snacks?
155
00:11:49,253 --> 00:11:49,918
(Eliza laughs)
156
00:11:50,021 --> 00:11:51,166
Completely!
157
00:11:51,268 --> 00:11:53,156
I mean, it gives me a chance
to explore what it really means
158
00:11:53,252 --> 00:11:56,732
to become a mother,
and nobody talks about this stuff.
159
00:11:56,836 --> 00:11:58,658
The sleep deprivation,
160
00:11:58,756 --> 00:12:03,010
the funks, the non-stop cleaning,
the death of lust.
161
00:12:03,107 --> 00:12:06,369
I can see Lunchbox x magazine
flying off the stands.
162
00:12:06,467 --> 00:12:08,409
Here's my first headline:
163
00:12:08,515 --> 00:12:12,409
"To thane own self be true:
Don't Breed."
164
00:12:12,514 --> 00:12:13,496
Too late.
165
00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:18,042
(Bongos playing)
166
00:12:30,817 --> 00:12:33,369
(Whispers)
Hi, Trixie!
167
00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:38,265
Shit!
168
00:12:38,367 --> 00:12:41,367
- What?
- Avery forgot to walk Coupon!
169
00:12:41,471 --> 00:12:42,267
Shit is right.
170
00:12:42,367 --> 00:12:46,971
You better get home, or you're
going to find a deposit on your rug.
171
00:12:47,071 --> 00:12:49,492
(Drilling sounds)
172
00:12:55,358 --> 00:12:57,845
ELIZA: Avery?
173
00:12:58,013 --> 00:12:59,955
Avery.
174
00:13:00,349 --> 00:13:02,553
Avery.
175
00:13:02,845 --> 00:13:05,332
This stuff is incredible, really.
176
00:13:05,436 --> 00:13:08,534
Uh, Avery, um, did you forget
something this morning?
177
00:13:08,636 --> 00:13:09,465
AVERY: What?
178
00:13:09,564 --> 00:13:11,768
I don't know, it was essentially
our firstborn, you know?
179
00:13:11,868 --> 00:13:13,493
The one
with the incontinence issues?
180
00:13:13,596 --> 00:13:14,773
Oops, sorry.
181
00:13:14,876 --> 00:13:17,014
Single most abused word
in the English language.
182
00:13:17,115 --> 00:13:18,129
AVERY:
"Oops" or "sorry"?
183
00:13:18,235 --> 00:13:20,918
All right, so I'll stay with Lucas,
and you go get Coupon.
184
00:13:21,019 --> 00:13:22,480
Oh, no, no, no.
You can't do that.
185
00:13:22,587 --> 00:13:24,561
I got an editorial meeting at 9:30.
186
00:13:24,667 --> 00:13:25,746
If I don't leave now,
I'm never going to make it.
187
00:13:25,850 --> 00:13:27,191
No, no, no, no!
You never told me that!
188
00:13:27,290 --> 00:13:29,908
Yes, I did. I told you this morning
while you were combing Clara's hair.
189
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:31,220
Don't worry, I'll be back by 1:00.
190
00:13:31,322 --> 00:13:32,532
No, but 1:00 is too late!
191
00:13:32,633 --> 00:13:34,259
I don't think Coupon
can hold it till then,
192
00:13:34,361 --> 00:13:35,605
and he can't walk himself
193
00:13:35,705 --> 00:13:37,231
because he can't make it
down the stairs anymore.
194
00:13:37,337 --> 00:13:37,806
AVERY: Holy Molly!
195
00:13:37,913 --> 00:13:39,287
ELIZA: Did you go
to the cash machine at least?
196
00:13:39,384 --> 00:13:42,766
Eliza, I wish you would stop
talking to me like I'm impaired.
197
00:13:42,872 --> 00:13:44,562
Yes, I did.
198
00:13:44,664 --> 00:13:46,071
I... No... I'm sorry, okay?
199
00:13:46,168 --> 00:13:48,339
There's just something I want
to do today. It's incredible.
200
00:13:48,439 --> 00:13:51,341
It's this writing thing, which
could be just perfect for me and...
201
00:13:51,448 --> 00:13:56,684
I guess I'll just figure out
how to get it all done by myself.
202
00:13:56,791 --> 00:13:59,092
- ELIZA: Bye!
- AVERY: Bye!
203
00:13:59,190 --> 00:14:01,677
(Music plays)
204
00:14:18,420 --> 00:14:20,722
(Grunts)
205
00:14:20,820 --> 00:14:23,372
Oh, come on.
206
00:14:23,476 --> 00:14:24,686
I got ya!
207
00:14:24,788 --> 00:14:27,471
(Deep breaths)
208
00:14:27,572 --> 00:14:28,782
Orange juice.
209
00:14:28,883 --> 00:14:31,436
Edith?
I forgot your orange juice.
210
00:14:31,539 --> 00:14:33,775
I'm sorry,
I'll bring you some more later?
211
00:14:33,875 --> 00:14:39,144
EDITH: Orange juice?
I don't need any orange juice, dear.
212
00:14:39,249 --> 00:14:42,478
I'm closing the door now, Edith.
It's not safe to leave it open.
213
00:14:46,481 --> 00:14:47,342
Okay.
214
00:14:49,456 --> 00:14:52,074
(Car alarm sounds)
215
00:14:58,736 --> 00:15:00,296
Hurry up, Coupon, let's go.
216
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,531
HESTER:
Street sweeper! Street sweeper!
217
00:15:03,631 --> 00:15:07,176
Oh! Oh, God. Coupon! Get busy.
218
00:15:07,279 --> 00:15:07,977
LUCAS: Get busy.
219
00:15:08,079 --> 00:15:10,118
HESTER:
Get a Prius, New Jersey!
220
00:15:10,222 --> 00:15:12,131
Go home, scumbag!
221
00:15:14,894 --> 00:15:17,447
Good job, Coupon!
Good boy!
222
00:15:22,989 --> 00:15:24,102
So, you just going to leave it there?
223
00:15:24,205 --> 00:15:26,954
No, I just, I got to get my kid
in the car,
224
00:15:27,052 --> 00:15:30,401
so I can move the car, so the street
sweeper can clean the street.
225
00:15:32,460 --> 00:15:33,703
I'll pick it up later.
226
00:15:33,804 --> 00:15:36,040
What if someone
steps in it before then?
227
00:15:36,139 --> 00:15:38,441
I'll call 311 and make a complaint.
228
00:15:38,539 --> 00:15:41,855
Well, I haven't found that
very effective, but be my guest.
229
00:15:41,963 --> 00:15:43,206
Here, honey.
230
00:15:48,170 --> 00:15:49,958
And you're not even
going to strap him in?
231
00:15:49,994 --> 00:15:50,976
Give me a break.
232
00:15:51,241 --> 00:15:53,151
ELIZA: Okay...
233
00:15:56,746 --> 00:15:57,476
Oh, no!
234
00:15:57,577 --> 00:15:58,471
(Engine starts)
235
00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:11,330
(Honking)
236
00:16:11,432 --> 00:16:13,853
IRATE DRIVER:
Come on, lady, move it!
237
00:16:14,503 --> 00:16:16,510
Now where the hell is this guy?
238
00:16:17,479 --> 00:16:18,820
WOMAN:
What's going on?
239
00:16:18,919 --> 00:16:21,439
HESTER: Every Tuesday and Friday
you got to move your car
240
00:16:21,543 --> 00:16:23,004
so they can clean the street.
241
00:16:23,111 --> 00:16:26,339
Oh, except this one here.
They're from Jersey.
242
00:16:26,438 --> 00:16:28,096
They leave it,
and then pay the ticket.
243
00:16:28,198 --> 00:16:29,659
It's cheaper than a garage.
244
00:16:29,766 --> 00:16:32,253
And then the street sweeper
can't get around!
245
00:16:32,997 --> 00:16:34,557
IRATE DRIVER:
Hey, move it, Volvo lady!
246
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:35,937
Move that freaking' car!
247
00:16:36,037 --> 00:16:38,819
I can't, I'll lose my spot!
248
00:16:38,917 --> 00:16:40,804
Why doesn't everybody just back up?
249
00:16:40,901 --> 00:16:42,591
IRATE DRIVER: Come on!
Move your car!
250
00:16:42,692 --> 00:16:43,968
Come around!
251
00:16:44,068 --> 00:16:46,108
IRATE DRIVER:
We can't move, 'ya cunt!
252
00:16:50,083 --> 00:16:51,065
Motherfucker!
253
00:16:51,171 --> 00:16:52,218
WOMAN:
What is that woman doing?
254
00:16:52,323 --> 00:16:53,631
She's nuts.
255
00:16:53,731 --> 00:16:55,935
Look, that's her dog shit.
She just left it there.
256
00:16:56,035 --> 00:16:57,311
- Oh!
- HESTER: Give him hell!
257
00:16:57,411 --> 00:16:58,872
Did you just say
what I think you said?
258
00:16:58,979 --> 00:16:59,872
Yeah, that's right, you heard me.
259
00:16:59,970 --> 00:17:03,101
You just used the C-word in front
of a child, in front of a school!
260
00:17:03,202 --> 00:17:04,925
Your mother must be
very proud of you.
261
00:17:05,026 --> 00:17:05,691
Hey, you leave my mother
out of this!
262
00:17:05,794 --> 00:17:06,328
No, no, no.
263
00:17:06,433 --> 00:17:08,888
She must be very, very proud
that her son grew up to be...
264
00:17:08,993 --> 00:17:10,302
What do you do?
Oh, roofing!
265
00:17:10,401 --> 00:17:11,962
That her son's a roofer.
266
00:17:12,065 --> 00:17:13,047
- Shut up, lady.
- Impressive.
267
00:17:13,152 --> 00:17:15,324
Do they give you a degree in that?
Advanced shingling?
268
00:17:15,424 --> 00:17:17,791
Hey, I said, shut up!
269
00:17:17,888 --> 00:17:20,124
(Honking intensifies
and people scream)
270
00:17:20,224 --> 00:17:24,118
All right, I'm sorry
that I insulted your profession.
271
00:17:24,223 --> 00:17:25,914
Well, somebody's got to fix roofs.
272
00:17:26,016 --> 00:17:27,990
(Chuckles)
Right. Agreed.
273
00:17:28,095 --> 00:17:29,621
I mean, I'm one to talk.
274
00:17:29,727 --> 00:17:32,792
I'm just trying to raise two kids
in this godforsaken city
275
00:17:32,894 --> 00:17:34,716
that's a shadow of its former self.
276
00:17:34,814 --> 00:17:36,821
Do you ever think about maybe
moving out to the suburbs?
277
00:17:36,926 --> 00:17:38,868
Like we could afford the taxes!
278
00:17:38,974 --> 00:17:40,948
Yeah, I hear you on that.
I hear you on that.
279
00:17:41,054 --> 00:17:43,835
He's escaping!
Somebody call the police!
280
00:17:43,933 --> 00:17:45,078
Hey, you better get up there!
281
00:17:45,181 --> 00:17:46,358
Oh! Oh!
282
00:17:46,461 --> 00:17:47,443
No!
283
00:17:47,548 --> 00:17:48,083
(Lucas giggles)
284
00:17:48,189 --> 00:17:50,044
MAN: Move the car!
This isn't a parking lot!
285
00:17:50,140 --> 00:17:51,122
ELIZA:
What are you doing?
286
00:17:51,228 --> 00:17:55,450
Oh! Sweetie! Sweetie! Oh, no, no, no!
I'm so sorry. Back you go.
287
00:17:55,548 --> 00:17:56,758
Report her to social services!
288
00:17:56,860 --> 00:17:58,550
Hey, cut the lady some slack.
289
00:17:58,652 --> 00:18:01,019
Can't you see
she's having a hard day?
290
00:18:01,115 --> 00:18:01,682
Thank you.
291
00:18:01,787 --> 00:18:04,786
(Honking continues)
292
00:18:04,891 --> 00:18:09,233
(Engine starts)
293
00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:14,646
Oh, watch out! Oh! Oh!
294
00:18:14,746 --> 00:18:15,345
Look.
295
00:18:16,697 --> 00:18:20,079
(Music plays)
296
00:18:20,953 --> 00:18:24,847
Lucas, sweetie, I am so sorry
I left you all alone like that.
297
00:18:24,953 --> 00:18:27,319
And mommy's sorry
she was smoking, too.
298
00:18:27,416 --> 00:18:29,325
And yelling.
299
00:18:29,432 --> 00:18:32,148
Smoking and yelling are two things
that Lunchbox x Magazine
300
00:18:32,248 --> 00:18:33,295
would tell you to avoid.
301
00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:34,709
(Tires screech)
302
00:18:37,719 --> 00:18:38,896
ELIZA: I'm sorry.
303
00:18:38,999 --> 00:18:43,122
Mommy's just going to, just race
around the block as fast as she can.
304
00:18:43,222 --> 00:18:44,499
As quick as a wink!
305
00:18:44,598 --> 00:18:45,296
A wink!
306
00:18:46,966 --> 00:18:49,519
Oh! I'm going to lose my spot!
307
00:18:49,622 --> 00:18:50,516
Oh, no.
308
00:18:51,798 --> 00:18:52,267
Don't!
309
00:18:52,373 --> 00:18:57,555
ELIZA: Oh, no-no-no-no-no!
Hey! No, no, no!
310
00:19:05,588 --> 00:19:07,443
All right, one sec.
311
00:19:07,540 --> 00:19:08,969
Don't, don't, don't.
312
00:19:13,843 --> 00:19:16,210
Excuse me!
313
00:19:16,306 --> 00:19:19,983
Look, I'm sorry to bother you!
314
00:19:20,146 --> 00:19:24,685
I know you're not napping because
I saw you just pull into my spot.
315
00:19:24,786 --> 00:19:26,346
It's not your spot.
316
00:19:26,450 --> 00:19:27,377
But I live here.
317
00:19:27,473 --> 00:19:29,513
You live in the West Village, so you
can afford to park someplace else.
318
00:19:29,617 --> 00:19:31,854
No, you can say that,
but you'd be wrong, okay?
319
00:19:31,953 --> 00:19:35,335
My apartment is right there,
rather I should say, our apartments.
320
00:19:35,441 --> 00:19:37,513
You've got more
than one apartment?
321
00:19:37,617 --> 00:19:40,005
They're rent stabilized,
and one is a studio.
322
00:19:40,112 --> 00:19:42,632
Look, I'm throwing a birthday party
for my daughter tonight,
323
00:19:42,736 --> 00:19:45,550
and I need to park here
so I can stash stuff in the car.
324
00:19:45,648 --> 00:19:47,338
That is, if I can fit anything,
325
00:19:47,439 --> 00:19:50,700
considering my husband has filled
the back of the car with old books.
326
00:19:50,799 --> 00:19:52,261
You see, he has this fantasy
327
00:19:52,367 --> 00:19:55,978
of starting an online rare book
business to enrich our lifestyle.
328
00:19:56,078 --> 00:19:57,507
How about that?
329
00:19:57,614 --> 00:20:00,232
Anyway, we live in a walk-up.
330
00:20:01,998 --> 00:20:03,372
Oh!
331
00:20:11,149 --> 00:20:11,912
Come on!
332
00:20:20,619 --> 00:20:23,815
(Bells toll)
333
00:20:27,946 --> 00:20:30,728
"My, what a wonderful house
this would be.
334
00:20:30,826 --> 00:20:34,949
I will live in it until the people
who own it come for it.
335
00:20:35,050 --> 00:20:37,122
And then, the little old man..."
336
00:20:37,226 --> 00:20:40,292
Oh, that's us. Okay.
Come on, sweetie.
337
00:20:40,393 --> 00:20:45,346
Ah... Okay, here we go.
338
00:20:45,641 --> 00:20:47,201
Ooh!
339
00:20:47,304 --> 00:20:50,337
Come, sweetie, here we go.
340
00:20:52,616 --> 00:20:55,103
(Deep breaths)
Yeah...
341
00:20:55,208 --> 00:20:57,509
(Sighs)
342
00:21:23,237 --> 00:21:25,178
Good sharing, Courtney!
343
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:29,277
I am very proud of you
for your excellent sharing.
344
00:21:30,564 --> 00:21:32,603
No, no, drop it.
345
00:21:32,708 --> 00:21:34,017
That's made in China.
346
00:21:35,299 --> 00:21:37,470
ELIZA:
Hey! Watch it.
347
00:21:37,571 --> 00:21:39,425
He's a whole lot smaller than you.
348
00:21:39,523 --> 00:21:41,378
Excuse me,
did you just say something?
349
00:21:41,474 --> 00:21:42,652
Did she say something to you, Jordan?
350
00:21:42,755 --> 00:21:46,202
ELIZA: Look, I'm sorry, but your son
nearly crushed my kid.
351
00:21:46,306 --> 00:21:47,582
He's a whole lot bigger.
352
00:21:47,682 --> 00:21:49,023
Are you saying
my son's overweight?
353
00:21:49,122 --> 00:21:52,286
I said big.
Actually, what I said was "bigger."
354
00:21:52,385 --> 00:21:54,774
Don't you dare
ever speak to him again.
355
00:21:54,881 --> 00:21:56,158
It's glandular!
356
00:21:58,688 --> 00:22:03,292
No, Trish.
Trish, you cook pot roast at 375.
357
00:22:03,392 --> 00:22:04,253
Yeah.
358
00:22:04,352 --> 00:22:09,207
And don't forget to mail
the Con-Ed bill, please.
359
00:22:09,311 --> 00:22:11,962
My wife.
360
00:22:12,064 --> 00:22:15,773
Yeah, okay, bye.
361
00:22:15,870 --> 00:22:17,397
Jodie Foster alert.
362
00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:18,485
Excuse me?
363
00:22:18,590 --> 00:22:22,070
I swear to God, it's Jodie!
She's coming in right now.
364
00:22:22,174 --> 00:22:25,490
Paparazzi: Jodie, Jodie!
Over here, Jodie! Who's the father?
365
00:22:25,598 --> 00:22:28,118
Last week, I had
a Sarah Jessica Parker sighting.
366
00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:32,280
I've seen Julianne Moore,
Kate Wins let, and James Gandolfini.
367
00:22:32,380 --> 00:22:34,322
I swear, it's like a movie star
playground.
368
00:22:34,429 --> 00:22:37,079
I come in all the way from Scarsdale
because, you know, you never know,
369
00:22:37,180 --> 00:22:40,627
I could sell it to Us, right?
370
00:22:40,732 --> 00:22:42,106
Paparazzi:
Who's your baby-daddy, Jodie?
371
00:22:42,204 --> 00:22:45,499
JODIE: You should work in a soup
kitchen, you fucking parasites.
372
00:22:45,595 --> 00:22:48,279
Here you go, honey.
Got your jacket?
373
00:22:48,379 --> 00:22:50,201
ELIZA: Should a mother
really have to choose
374
00:22:50,299 --> 00:22:52,787
between simply getting
her kid some fresh air
375
00:22:52,890 --> 00:22:54,865
and being stalked
by the mamarazzi?
376
00:22:56,186 --> 00:22:58,357
LILY: Hey, Eliza.
377
00:22:58,458 --> 00:23:00,563
Hey, Lily! Hey, Bodhi!
378
00:23:00,666 --> 00:23:01,560
- Say hi.
- Hi.
379
00:23:01,658 --> 00:23:03,064
What's with the HAZMAT suit?
380
00:23:03,161 --> 00:23:05,747
Oh, this?
It's a UV-protection robe.
381
00:23:05,849 --> 00:23:08,947
I got it for Bodhi off this website.
They make them in Australia.
382
00:23:09,049 --> 00:23:10,391
Because of the warming.
383
00:23:10,488 --> 00:23:11,830
Ah...
384
00:23:11,929 --> 00:23:15,987
I hate to say this, but he kind of
looks like a little baby Klansman.
385
00:23:16,088 --> 00:23:20,626
Oh, well, it cuts out 99 percent
of harmful rays.
386
00:23:20,727 --> 00:23:23,629
I can send you the link if you want.
I got Indy a poncho off it.
387
00:23:23,735 --> 00:23:25,874
Maybe Clara would want one.
388
00:23:25,975 --> 00:23:27,633
It's okay.
389
00:23:27,735 --> 00:23:30,702
Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to interrupt you.
390
00:23:30,806 --> 00:23:34,603
No, no, no. I'm just...
entering this contest.
391
00:23:34,710 --> 00:23:38,190
Really? What's the contest?
392
00:23:38,294 --> 00:23:41,970
Just write 500 words about
what motherhood means to me.
393
00:23:42,069 --> 00:23:43,116
What are you going to say?
394
00:23:43,221 --> 00:23:49,363
Um...
Stuff, I guess. I don't know.
395
00:23:49,460 --> 00:23:52,013
How motherhood
is all about rainbows and unicorns
396
00:23:52,116 --> 00:23:55,083
and sunny days and...
397
00:23:55,187 --> 00:23:56,681
I've got something up my sleeve.
398
00:23:56,788 --> 00:23:58,097
Okay.
399
00:23:58,195 --> 00:23:59,504
Hey, do you want to borrow some?
400
00:23:59,603 --> 00:24:01,872
It's cruelty and chemical free.
They make it in Oregon.
401
00:24:01,971 --> 00:24:03,858
No, thanks.
402
00:24:12,594 --> 00:24:15,757
(Bodhi cries)
403
00:24:19,249 --> 00:24:21,136
(Lily sobs)
404
00:24:33,839 --> 00:24:38,956
Lily? Lily, what are you doing?
405
00:24:39,055 --> 00:24:41,389
Oh, haven't you read
The Crying and the Raging?
406
00:24:43,790 --> 00:24:46,211
It's the most amazing book.
407
00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:49,067
This paediatrician in Norway
came up with the theory
408
00:24:49,166 --> 00:24:52,165
that if you really connect
with your child in his moment of pain,
409
00:24:52,269 --> 00:24:54,178
it calms them down.
410
00:24:54,285 --> 00:24:56,227
It's really made a difference
for me and Bodhi.
411
00:24:56,333 --> 00:24:57,991
Lily, will you excuse me
for a second?
412
00:24:58,092 --> 00:25:00,296
Oh, sure.
413
00:25:00,397 --> 00:25:02,436
Are you feeling better?
414
00:25:02,540 --> 00:25:05,671
Do you have the hiccups?
415
00:25:05,771 --> 00:25:08,454
Let's look around
and see what we see.
416
00:25:08,555 --> 00:25:13,857
I think I see a little chipmunk.
Oh, that's not a chipmunk.
417
00:25:16,522 --> 00:25:17,667
SHEILA: I don't have
the faintest notion
418
00:25:17,771 --> 00:25:19,396
what motherhood means to me,
you know what I mean?
419
00:25:19,498 --> 00:25:22,464
Since when does a stroller
have to cost as much as a car?
420
00:25:22,570 --> 00:25:24,544
Okay, a used car.
421
00:25:24,650 --> 00:25:26,504
SHEILA: Since the world
has started breeding more.
422
00:25:26,601 --> 00:25:28,292
- Oh!
- SHEILA: What?
423
00:25:28,393 --> 00:25:30,759
- ELIZA: I can't believe...
- SHEILA: What?
424
00:25:30,857 --> 00:25:32,799
ELIZA:
They towed my goddamn car!
425
00:25:32,904 --> 00:25:34,181
- SHEILA: Oh, shit.
- Oh!
426
00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:35,906
AVERY (VOICEMAIL): Please
leave your message at the beep.
427
00:25:36,008 --> 00:25:37,535
ELIZA:
Avery, where are you?
428
00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:41,828
I'm freaking out, okay?
They're shooting on our block again.
429
00:25:41,928 --> 00:25:44,710
They moved the cars.
Call me as soon as you get this.
430
00:25:44,808 --> 00:25:45,506
I got to go. Bye.
431
00:25:45,607 --> 00:25:47,429
Where is my car?
432
00:25:47,527 --> 00:25:48,607
We have a resident here.
433
00:25:48,710 --> 00:25:49,441
MALE VOICE:
She can pick up her car anytime.
434
00:25:49,543 --> 00:25:50,110
Copy that.
435
00:25:50,214 --> 00:25:51,261
Who moved it?
436
00:25:51,367 --> 00:25:54,366
Well, there's signs on all the posts.
Check them. No parking today.
437
00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:57,404
There were no signs
when I left it here an hour ago.
438
00:25:57,510 --> 00:25:59,004
- Right there!
- Ma'am, look...
439
00:25:59,109 --> 00:25:59,938
Don't "ma'am" me!
440
00:26:00,037 --> 00:26:01,925
I may technically be old enough
to be your mother,
441
00:26:02,021 --> 00:26:03,069
but I am not a "ma'am."
442
00:26:03,173 --> 00:26:04,122
The car's been moved
443
00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:05,538
to a secure location
on Barrow Street,
444
00:26:05,637 --> 00:26:07,197
all the way west.
445
00:26:07,300 --> 00:26:10,170
Film crews are supposed
to give 24-hour notice.
446
00:26:10,276 --> 00:26:11,705
I can give you the number
to the mayor's office
447
00:26:11,812 --> 00:26:13,503
if you'd like to call
and file a complaint.
448
00:26:13,604 --> 00:26:14,881
Very helpful. Great.
449
00:26:14,980 --> 00:26:19,038
You're telling me that you towed
my car, and I have to bite it, right?
450
00:26:19,139 --> 00:26:20,863
Ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you
to cross the street.
451
00:26:20,963 --> 00:26:22,141
We're setting up here.
452
00:26:22,243 --> 00:26:23,804
Hester, can you believe this?
453
00:26:23,907 --> 00:26:26,776
I'm going to piss in a pot
and dump it on 'em later.
454
00:26:26,883 --> 00:26:28,639
Out the window, splat.
455
00:26:28,738 --> 00:26:30,494
Right on!
456
00:26:34,146 --> 00:26:36,349
Danny, go to two.
457
00:26:36,834 --> 00:26:40,990
ELIZA: Why is it that once
you pass 35 and have a kid in tow,
458
00:26:41,025 --> 00:26:43,676
you automatically
become a "ma'am"?
459
00:26:43,713 --> 00:26:47,509
"Ma'am" means support hose,
a girdle, a bad perm.
460
00:26:47,616 --> 00:26:50,463
I'll wear hot pants and platforms
when I'm on a walker
461
00:26:50,560 --> 00:26:55,480
if only to avoid
being called "ma'am."
462
00:27:02,399 --> 00:27:04,570
(Phone rings)
463
00:27:07,102 --> 00:27:10,680
Avery, Avery, Avery!
Answer your phone for once, Avery!
464
00:27:10,782 --> 00:27:12,156
AVERY (VOICEMAIL): You've reached
Avery. Please leave your message...
465
00:27:12,254 --> 00:27:13,497
(Sighs)
466
00:27:21,308 --> 00:27:25,366
ELIZA: I used to be fluid,
I used to be, I don't know, graceful.
467
00:27:25,468 --> 00:27:29,177
Now my words come out,
and they just sound like bad ad copy.
468
00:27:29,276 --> 00:27:32,821
Well, maybe your brain's
worn out from over-sharing.
469
00:27:32,923 --> 00:27:36,271
Sheila, just blog-slam me
when I'm down!
470
00:27:36,379 --> 00:27:38,037
(Sheila laughs)
471
00:27:38,138 --> 00:27:40,505
Avery lost his cell phone,
by the way,
472
00:27:40,602 --> 00:27:42,128
the ultimate passive-aggressive act.
473
00:27:42,234 --> 00:27:44,655
Avery would lose his scrotum
if it wasn't attached.
474
00:27:44,762 --> 00:27:46,550
Well, it's either that,
or he silenced it,
475
00:27:46,650 --> 00:27:50,130
which is the most effective way
of silencing me.
476
00:27:50,233 --> 00:27:55,535
Ah... No longer my problem,
being silenced.
477
00:27:55,641 --> 00:27:57,550
I mean,
God forbid I ever raised a topic
478
00:27:57,656 --> 00:28:01,453
from Joel's top 10 list
of "musts to avoid."
479
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:04,113
Like, why you can't balance
his check book.
480
00:28:04,215 --> 00:28:07,663
Or vacuum. Or remember
the substitute teacher's name.
481
00:28:07,767 --> 00:28:10,385
Or tolerate a single comment
about September 11
482
00:28:10,487 --> 00:28:11,828
at the dinner table.
483
00:28:11,926 --> 00:28:14,293
God, maybe that's going to show up
in the divorce papers.
484
00:28:14,391 --> 00:28:16,846
"Refused to stop referencing
traumatic event
485
00:28:16,950 --> 00:28:18,859
more than six years
after the fact."
486
00:28:18,966 --> 00:28:19,696
Mm-hmm.
487
00:28:19,798 --> 00:28:23,627
"By the way,
'Why can't you just get over it?"'
488
00:28:23,734 --> 00:28:25,457
I'll tell you why.
489
00:28:25,557 --> 00:28:29,747
'Cause you're always thinking,
you're always wondering, "What if?"
490
00:28:29,845 --> 00:28:32,430
I mean, have I done everything
I could possibly do
491
00:28:32,533 --> 00:28:35,696
to stave off disaster?
492
00:28:35,796 --> 00:28:38,796
Did I tell Clara how much I loved her
this morning before school,
493
00:28:38,900 --> 00:28:40,361
just in case
she never makes it home again.
494
00:28:40,468 --> 00:28:42,923
Oh, Liz, you got to stop.
495
00:28:43,027 --> 00:28:45,482
I can't stop.
496
00:28:45,587 --> 00:28:47,953
Well, as a fearless leader
once said,
497
00:28:48,050 --> 00:28:52,305
"When you can't stop,
you must shop."
498
00:28:53,554 --> 00:28:55,561
(Music plays in store)
499
00:29:05,425 --> 00:29:07,846
You know, the grand irony
of the whole thing
500
00:29:07,952 --> 00:29:12,458
is that the first time around,
all I wanted...
501
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:13,803
Thank you.
502
00:29:13,904 --> 00:29:16,838
...was for Joel to leave me alone
and not touch me.
503
00:29:16,944 --> 00:29:18,285
Well, that was because
your joints ached.
504
00:29:18,383 --> 00:29:20,238
And I had to pee
every five seconds.
505
00:29:20,335 --> 00:29:22,439
Which is better than peeing
all over yourself,
506
00:29:22,543 --> 00:29:25,030
which is what you do
after you give birth.
507
00:29:25,134 --> 00:29:27,305
Yeah, the cruel twist of fate
is that at this time,
508
00:29:27,406 --> 00:29:29,380
all the women do is shag.
509
00:29:29,486 --> 00:29:31,308
And there is nobody to shag me.
510
00:29:31,405 --> 00:29:33,478
She got pregnant
through sympathy sex.
511
00:29:33,581 --> 00:29:35,720
Her husband felt guilty
after he ran off,
512
00:29:35,821 --> 00:29:38,188
so he sent the kids out with a sitter,
got a bottle of wine,
513
00:29:38,285 --> 00:29:39,561
and jumped on her.
514
00:29:39,661 --> 00:29:40,871
Shagged me madly.
515
00:29:40,973 --> 00:29:42,282
Got her pregnant...
516
00:29:42,380 --> 00:29:43,362
And then he left her.
517
00:29:43,468 --> 00:29:44,678
Pig!
518
00:29:44,781 --> 00:29:46,853
Oh, yeah.
519
00:29:48,812 --> 00:29:49,706
SHEILA:
Hey, you guys...
520
00:29:49,804 --> 00:29:51,975
- ELIZA: That's nice.
- SHEILA: It's pretty, yeah.
521
00:29:52,075 --> 00:29:53,733
For a 6-year-old.
522
00:29:53,835 --> 00:29:55,242
I got to tell you something.
523
00:29:55,340 --> 00:29:57,478
It does not leave this room.
524
00:29:57,579 --> 00:30:01,572
Okay, so last night,
I got the kids to bed about 9:00,
525
00:30:01,674 --> 00:30:02,721
and I ran a bath,
526
00:30:02,826 --> 00:30:03,906
which would have been
really lovely
527
00:30:04,010 --> 00:30:06,181
except I only had that
Strawberry Shortcake bubble bath.
528
00:30:06,282 --> 00:30:11,016
- So I'm lying there, in the bath...
- Yeah...
529
00:30:11,113 --> 00:30:12,771
naked...
530
00:30:12,873 --> 00:30:14,214
What? What?
531
00:30:14,313 --> 00:30:15,109
Good!
532
00:30:15,209 --> 00:30:16,136
(Laughing)
533
00:30:16,233 --> 00:30:20,094
You know the little, um,
motorized submarine bath toys...
534
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:22,501
- The little, "Chiggachiggachigga..."
- Yeah.
535
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,607
Oh!
536
00:30:24,712 --> 00:30:25,791
What?
537
00:30:26,215 --> 00:30:27,938
You know, they look
a bit like dildos.
538
00:30:30,823 --> 00:30:31,586
You're dirty!
539
00:30:31,687 --> 00:30:32,832
(Laughing)
540
00:30:32,934 --> 00:30:35,552
It was lovely.
And it was amazing.
541
00:30:35,655 --> 00:30:39,583
It was lovely and amazing.
I got very lucky with the submarine.
542
00:30:39,686 --> 00:30:40,799
Oh...
543
00:30:40,902 --> 00:30:44,066
Okay, all right, look,
the moment of reckoning.
544
00:30:44,166 --> 00:30:47,743
Lay it on me.
Where would I wear this?
545
00:30:47,845 --> 00:30:48,957
Parent-teacher conference.
546
00:30:50,469 --> 00:30:52,127
Okay.
547
00:30:52,549 --> 00:30:53,214
What about...
548
00:30:55,236 --> 00:30:56,218
...this one?
549
00:30:56,324 --> 00:30:59,422
Well, that's for the date that's
never going to happen, isn't it?
550
00:30:59,524 --> 00:31:04,193
Or in case you ever feel like enticing
the spousal unit to do 'ya.
551
00:31:05,315 --> 00:31:06,559
Hey, how about this one?
552
00:31:06,659 --> 00:31:09,888
Well, that's nice.
That's for keeping cozy at your desk.
553
00:31:09,987 --> 00:31:12,223
Cozy at my desk doing what?
554
00:31:12,323 --> 00:31:13,817
I don't know. I'm just here
for the fashion advice.
555
00:31:13,922 --> 00:31:17,337
I can't solve your life crisis.
556
00:31:17,441 --> 00:31:21,336
I'm going to go check out
the size 29.
557
00:31:22,561 --> 00:31:24,121
ELIZA: What does it say
about the world
558
00:31:24,225 --> 00:31:27,094
when a perfectly attractive woman
like my best friend Sheila
559
00:31:27,201 --> 00:31:32,601
has to resort to wanking off
with her son's bath toy?
560
00:31:32,704 --> 00:31:34,013
Oh...
561
00:31:34,112 --> 00:31:37,078
Even if she is seriously pregnant
at this point,
562
00:31:37,184 --> 00:31:40,926
it somehow seems unjust.
563
00:31:43,135 --> 00:31:44,695
(Keyboard clicking)
564
00:31:48,607 --> 00:31:52,501
Motherhood is not knowing
what's going to hit you next.
565
00:31:52,606 --> 00:31:56,948
Motherhood is a day in May,
a hot air balloon...
566
00:32:02,460 --> 00:32:05,875
... God's gift to womankind.
567
00:32:16,155 --> 00:32:19,221
(Lucas hums)
568
00:32:27,866 --> 00:32:29,807
(Lucas mumbles something
to himself)
569
00:32:35,449 --> 00:32:38,231
ELIZA: What about when
your child's hand is still so small
570
00:32:38,328 --> 00:32:42,452
that he or she puts that hand
in yours with absolute trust?
571
00:32:42,553 --> 00:32:45,138
Their incredibly soft cheeks
when you kiss them.
572
00:32:45,240 --> 00:32:47,379
The way their foreheads sweat
when they're sleeping,
573
00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:48,854
and the hair sticks to it.
574
00:32:48,951 --> 00:32:53,391
The hilariously weird things they
say when they're learning to talk.
575
00:32:53,495 --> 00:32:56,145
The way you save their lost teeth
after they fall out,
576
00:32:56,247 --> 00:32:58,156
and you've done
your tooth fairy routine,
577
00:32:58,263 --> 00:32:59,986
like some demented Nazi,
578
00:33:00,087 --> 00:33:03,152
because you can't stand
to give up any part of them,
579
00:33:03,254 --> 00:33:05,741
no matter how tiny.
580
00:33:05,846 --> 00:33:06,315
(Door shuts slams shut)
581
00:33:06,421 --> 00:33:08,177
Oh... Sorry I'm late.
582
00:33:08,278 --> 00:33:12,172
Morris needed the final edit
on the Albanian manuscript.
583
00:33:12,277 --> 00:33:14,960
Jesus, you know, I had to pile
through a bunch of extras
584
00:33:15,060 --> 00:33:18,443
with really bad moustaches
just to get to the front door.
585
00:33:18,548 --> 00:33:20,239
Did you notice
that our car got towed?
586
00:33:20,340 --> 00:33:22,445
Yes, I did.
I've been trying to call you.
587
00:33:22,548 --> 00:33:24,108
- AVERY: Hi!
- LUCAS: Hi.
588
00:33:24,211 --> 00:33:26,382
- AVERY: Really?
- Mm-hmm.
589
00:33:26,483 --> 00:33:28,523
Oh, yeah. Look at that.
Eight missed calls.
590
00:33:28,627 --> 00:33:29,521
Ringer must have been off.
591
00:33:30,227 --> 00:33:32,845
So, uh, did you have something
you needed to tell me?
592
00:33:32,946 --> 00:33:34,702
ELIZA: Nothing that I couldn't
figure out on my own.
593
00:33:34,802 --> 00:33:36,046
You have no idea
how lucky you are
594
00:33:36,146 --> 00:33:38,088
to be married
to a consummate multitasked.
595
00:33:38,194 --> 00:33:39,568
Ah, but I do know.
596
00:33:43,986 --> 00:33:46,506
ELIZA: Hey, can you please
take him across the hall?
597
00:33:46,609 --> 00:33:48,682
I need to put in
another half an hour. I just...
598
00:33:48,785 --> 00:33:49,865
I'm just beginning
to get somewhere.
599
00:33:49,968 --> 00:33:50,917
- Oh, really?
- ELIZA: Yep.
600
00:33:51,024 --> 00:33:51,885
Good.
601
00:33:55,728 --> 00:33:58,859
(Bell tolls)
602
00:34:06,671 --> 00:34:09,540
AVERY: Is that Paul?
I think that's Paul.
603
00:34:09,647 --> 00:34:12,199
Do you see him?
604
00:34:13,518 --> 00:34:14,728
- Did I miss her?
- AVERY: No, no.
605
00:34:14,830 --> 00:34:18,212
Hi, sweetie! Hi!
606
00:34:19,662 --> 00:34:21,352
See your sister, yeah?
607
00:34:21,453 --> 00:34:22,314
Where is she?
608
00:34:23,789 --> 00:34:26,025
- AVERY: Oh, there she is.
- Hi!
609
00:34:26,125 --> 00:34:28,361
Hi, Mom! Hi!
610
00:34:28,460 --> 00:34:30,631
Hi, Clara!
611
00:34:30,732 --> 00:34:32,739
- Oh...
- Oh, God!
612
00:34:32,844 --> 00:34:34,186
Clara!
613
00:34:34,284 --> 00:34:35,974
TEACHER:
Line up, please!
614
00:34:36,076 --> 00:34:37,766
ELIZA: Clara?
615
00:34:37,867 --> 00:34:39,427
Clara?
616
00:34:39,531 --> 00:34:43,305
(Children playing)
617
00:34:47,114 --> 00:34:50,430
It's her last day of being 5.
618
00:34:55,049 --> 00:34:57,351
Oh, Avery, Avery, Avery,
Lucas is here.
619
00:34:57,450 --> 00:34:58,431
Didn't you notice?
620
00:34:58,537 --> 00:35:01,406
I put him in front of the Teletubbies.
He'll be paralyzed for an hour.
621
00:35:01,513 --> 00:35:03,684
No, no, no...
I'd love to, but I can't. No!
622
00:35:03,784 --> 00:35:05,856
I have a deadline
and a party to throw, remember?
623
00:35:05,960 --> 00:35:07,389
Yeah.
624
00:35:07,496 --> 00:35:08,773
(Music plays)
625
00:35:12,423 --> 00:35:14,692
Av? Can I borrow your bike?
626
00:35:14,791 --> 00:35:15,423
Sure.
627
00:35:15,527 --> 00:35:18,691
Oh, can you read my draft?
628
00:35:18,791 --> 00:35:20,165
Can you explain to me
what it is again?
629
00:35:20,263 --> 00:35:21,757
Yes.
630
00:35:21,862 --> 00:35:24,545
I'm submitting a piece
to a parenting magazine.
631
00:35:24,646 --> 00:35:27,198
It's a contest.
I mean, it's kind of a real gig.
632
00:35:27,302 --> 00:35:28,763
But I can't get into that right now.
633
00:35:28,870 --> 00:35:31,717
It's only 500 words.
It's a first draft.
634
00:35:31,813 --> 00:35:34,463
But, no, I feel like it's solid,
you know?
635
00:35:34,565 --> 00:35:37,379
Something I could put my name to
and feel good about it.
636
00:35:37,476 --> 00:35:38,818
I left a copy on my desk.
637
00:35:38,917 --> 00:35:40,062
Sure.
638
00:35:40,164 --> 00:35:41,092
And, Avery?
639
00:35:41,188 --> 00:35:42,682
Hmm?
640
00:35:42,788 --> 00:35:45,438
Mm... Nothing. It's just...
641
00:35:45,540 --> 00:35:47,263
Be honest.
642
00:35:47,364 --> 00:35:48,640
Bye.
643
00:35:52,195 --> 00:35:52,697
Bye!
644
00:35:52,803 --> 00:35:55,672
- LUCAS: Bye.
- Bye.
645
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:18,331
(The Go-Between's
"Streets of Your Town" plays)
646
00:36:48,860 --> 00:36:50,070
ELIZA: Shit!
647
00:36:56,220 --> 00:36:58,325
(Honking)
648
00:36:58,684 --> 00:37:03,255
(Elevator-type music plays)
649
00:37:19,385 --> 00:37:21,938
BOY: Mama,
I want the big Spider-Man,
650
00:37:22,041 --> 00:37:24,310
not the little Spider-Man.
651
00:37:24,409 --> 00:37:26,896
No, I told you...
It's 39 dollars.
652
00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:29,171
BOY:
I want the big one!
653
00:37:29,272 --> 00:37:31,955
It's too much money, now, come on!
654
00:37:32,855 --> 00:37:35,572
I told you,
you can't have this, Jorge!
655
00:37:35,672 --> 00:37:36,915
Stop it, that's enough.
656
00:37:37,015 --> 00:37:38,444
Come on. Laura?
657
00:37:38,551 --> 00:37:40,209
Laura, get back over here!
658
00:37:40,855 --> 00:37:43,276
Jorge, come on.
659
00:37:48,790 --> 00:37:52,466
Laura?
Laura, get back over here.
660
00:38:06,676 --> 00:38:08,050
(Music plays)
661
00:38:33,265 --> 00:38:35,021
ELIZA:
Yeah, Sheila, got the backpack.
662
00:38:35,121 --> 00:38:36,844
I'm doing my Sherpa routine.
663
00:38:36,945 --> 00:38:38,406
SHEILA: Do you think our children
have any idea
664
00:38:38,512 --> 00:38:39,406
how we suffer on their behalf?
665
00:38:39,504 --> 00:38:40,431
ELIZA: Absolutely not.
666
00:38:40,528 --> 00:38:41,957
WOMAN:
Hey, you can't cut the line.
667
00:38:42,064 --> 00:38:42,762
Wait your turn!
668
00:38:42,864 --> 00:38:43,758
Look, I got to get out of here.
669
00:38:43,856 --> 00:38:46,277
I just waited 20 minutes
for some moron to blow up balloons.
670
00:38:46,383 --> 00:38:47,528
Well, you can't cut the line.
671
00:38:47,631 --> 00:38:50,216
I've got to go pick up my twins
from preschool in 10 minutes.
672
00:38:50,319 --> 00:38:52,707
They fine you if you're late.
673
00:38:52,815 --> 00:38:53,447
SHEILA:
What the hell is going on?
674
00:38:53,550 --> 00:38:56,005
Crazy, crazy,
now showing everywhere.
675
00:38:56,111 --> 00:38:57,190
SHEILA: Hang on,
I'm just going to get my tea.
676
00:38:57,294 --> 00:39:00,458
Hi, yes.
This is Allison Hopper.
677
00:39:00,558 --> 00:39:03,209
Sorry, I'm just going to be
a weensy bit late
678
00:39:03,309 --> 00:39:06,157
picking up Sky and Banjo
this afternoon.
679
00:39:06,253 --> 00:39:07,682
Sorry about that.
680
00:39:07,789 --> 00:39:13,320
So, Sheila, I'm feeling, why do I
even care if I win this contest?
681
00:39:13,420 --> 00:39:16,355
I mean, I'm addressing such
a narrow sector of the population.
682
00:39:16,460 --> 00:39:17,670
WOMAN:
Move up, the line moved.
683
00:39:17,772 --> 00:39:19,681
SHEILA: Not as narrow
as the one you're addressing there.
684
00:39:19,788 --> 00:39:20,802
Where are you?
685
00:39:20,908 --> 00:39:22,337
ELIZA:
Getting goody bag stuff.
686
00:39:22,443 --> 00:39:24,548
So much for sticking
to your principles.
687
00:39:24,651 --> 00:39:27,073
"So much for sticking
to your principles."
688
00:39:29,514 --> 00:39:31,816
(Whispering)
Some freakazoid is bothering me.
689
00:39:31,914 --> 00:39:34,183
"Freakazoid!"
690
00:39:34,282 --> 00:39:35,526
What the hell is your problem?
691
00:39:35,625 --> 00:39:37,032
What the hell is your problem?
692
00:39:37,130 --> 00:39:40,064
ELIZA: Sheila,
I'm going to call you back, okay?
693
00:39:40,169 --> 00:39:41,478
SHEILA:
No, no, no!
694
00:39:41,578 --> 00:39:45,538
ELIZA: Listen, I wasn't speaking
very loudly in the first place, okay?
695
00:39:45,641 --> 00:39:47,015
I believe in cell phone etiquette.
696
00:39:47,113 --> 00:39:49,862
You introduced your conversation
into my personal space,
697
00:39:49,961 --> 00:39:52,546
thus violating any commonly held
definition of "etiquette."
698
00:39:52,648 --> 00:39:53,476
Is that so?
699
00:39:53,576 --> 00:39:54,524
Move it! Move up!
700
00:39:55,272 --> 00:39:57,312
Did you know that 90 percent
of cell phone users
701
00:39:57,415 --> 00:39:58,211
believe they're courteous
702
00:39:58,311 --> 00:39:59,969
while 85 percent
of those same users
703
00:40:00,072 --> 00:40:02,308
complain about being annoyed
by others' conversations?
704
00:40:02,407 --> 00:40:04,708
Now, those numbers
really don't add up, do they?
705
00:40:04,807 --> 00:40:06,367
ELIZA: Why don't we have
this conversation in 20 years,
706
00:40:06,471 --> 00:40:08,380
when you've learned a thing or two
about the real world?
707
00:40:08,486 --> 00:40:09,414
Oh, you mean when I'm old?
708
00:40:09,510 --> 00:40:11,004
(Sighs)
709
00:40:11,110 --> 00:40:13,531
Even you, my friend,
will turn 40.
710
00:40:13,638 --> 00:40:16,255
(Screams)
711
00:40:16,357 --> 00:40:17,567
(Mumbles something)
712
00:40:17,669 --> 00:40:18,268
COLLEGE STUDENT:
You know what?
713
00:40:18,373 --> 00:40:20,893
You urban moms are like
a case study in liberal hypocrisy.
714
00:40:20,996 --> 00:40:23,484
You think the rules apply
to other people, but never to you.
715
00:40:23,588 --> 00:40:25,498
You blab your precious banalities
into cell phones,
716
00:40:25,604 --> 00:40:26,531
you buy gluten-free snacks,
717
00:40:26,628 --> 00:40:28,450
yet have no comprehension
of your carbon footprint!
718
00:40:28,548 --> 00:40:31,482
I'd like to shove my carbon footprint
right up your ass.
719
00:40:31,588 --> 00:40:33,824
Come on, you're up, you're up!
720
00:40:33,923 --> 00:40:36,410
Can you believe this dickhead?
721
00:40:39,555 --> 00:40:40,121
I'm sorry.
722
00:40:40,227 --> 00:40:42,332
GIRL: Mommy!
She said "dickhead"!
723
00:40:42,434 --> 00:40:46,046
(Shakespeare’s Sister's
"Goodbye Cruel World" plays)
724
00:41:32,701 --> 00:41:34,042
But that's not her name.
725
00:41:34,141 --> 00:41:34,970
Yes, it is.
726
00:41:35,068 --> 00:41:37,239
Says it right here on the order form:
"Clara."
727
00:41:37,340 --> 00:41:39,674
Her name is "Clara."
728
00:41:39,772 --> 00:41:40,819
Look, see?
729
00:41:40,924 --> 00:41:43,793
"Clara."
Not, "Clara."
730
00:41:43,899 --> 00:41:46,801
Well, our forester
is on a cigarette break, so...
731
00:41:46,907 --> 00:41:48,598
Well, can't someone else fix it?
732
00:41:48,699 --> 00:41:51,480
All you have to do is just
scrape off the "ra", right?
733
00:41:51,578 --> 00:41:54,033
And rewrite it in matching icing
so it doesn't look like an accident.
734
00:41:54,139 --> 00:41:55,665
Only the forester can do that.
735
00:41:55,770 --> 00:41:58,322
ELIZA: Look, I have to go home.
I mean, I have to set up.
736
00:41:58,426 --> 00:42:00,400
So come back.
We're open till midnight.
737
00:42:00,506 --> 00:42:03,091
ELIZA: I can't come back.
The party is at 5:00.
738
00:42:03,193 --> 00:42:04,818
Agh...
739
00:42:04,921 --> 00:42:06,928
You have to admit
it's your own fault.
740
00:42:07,032 --> 00:42:08,494
If you had named her
"Sophie" or "Ella,"
741
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:11,764
you wouldn't be having this problem,
but you gave her an "Edna" name.
742
00:42:11,864 --> 00:42:14,133
- A what?
- You know, an "Edna" name?
743
00:42:14,232 --> 00:42:16,850
Like "Mabel" or "Agnes" or "Velma."
744
00:42:16,952 --> 00:42:18,774
Yeah, like lesbian librarian names.
745
00:42:18,871 --> 00:42:20,627
WOMAN: Don't you read
the "Cranky pants Post"?
746
00:42:20,727 --> 00:42:23,825
She did a whole thing last week
about names, it was genius.
747
00:42:23,927 --> 00:42:26,032
Well, yes, I mean I do read her,
748
00:42:26,134 --> 00:42:29,069
but I like other
parenting blogs better.
749
00:42:29,174 --> 00:42:30,897
What about "The Bjorn Identity"?
750
00:42:30,998 --> 00:42:33,300
That woman is so... I don't know.
751
00:42:33,398 --> 00:42:35,886
I think she's a feminist.
752
00:42:35,989 --> 00:42:37,516
Well, what could be worse than that?
753
00:42:37,621 --> 00:42:41,680
ELIZA: Anyway, "Clara"
is not an "Edna" name, right?
754
00:42:41,781 --> 00:42:44,880
WOMAN: Let me guess, you named
her after your favourite grandmother?
755
00:42:44,980 --> 00:42:46,190
Stop.
756
00:42:46,517 --> 00:42:50,094
(The Dear Jane’s "Ship" plays)
757
00:43:33,295 --> 00:43:34,604
Oh, excuse me.
758
00:43:34,703 --> 00:43:36,361
Excuse me, I live here.
759
00:43:36,463 --> 00:43:40,237
Oh, do you know if there's
a McKendrick in 6-C?
760
00:43:40,335 --> 00:43:43,269
Yes, I do.
6-C and 6-B.
761
00:43:43,374 --> 00:43:43,908
Try the buzzers?
762
00:43:44,014 --> 00:43:44,646
Yeah.
763
00:43:44,750 --> 00:43:45,513
What?
764
00:43:47,213 --> 00:43:49,002
Oh, no! No!
765
00:43:49,101 --> 00:43:51,818
Avery!
766
00:43:51,917 --> 00:43:53,029
I just...
767
00:43:53,133 --> 00:43:54,212
Classic!
768
00:43:54,317 --> 00:43:57,034
How am I going to get
this shit upstairs?
769
00:43:57,132 --> 00:43:58,409
I was going to stash it in my car,
770
00:43:58,508 --> 00:44:00,483
which I like to call
my roving metal purse,
771
00:44:00,588 --> 00:44:03,010
which was parked right over there,
but then...
772
00:44:03,116 --> 00:44:03,945
(Groans)
773
00:44:04,043 --> 00:44:10,120
Then... this came!
This invasion of the block snatchers!
774
00:44:10,219 --> 00:44:13,186
I've got to throw a party
for my daughter...
775
00:44:13,290 --> 00:44:14,851
...at 5:00!
776
00:44:14,954 --> 00:44:16,776
I don't know
where my husband has gone.
777
00:44:16,874 --> 00:44:23,103
He has this habit of disappearing
right when I need him the most.
778
00:44:23,337 --> 00:44:25,508
Just, I'll sign for it, okay?
779
00:44:29,417 --> 00:44:30,791
You've got a lot to carry.
780
00:44:51,559 --> 00:44:55,748
So, Mikes,
you a messenger full-time?
781
00:44:55,846 --> 00:44:57,700
Of course not. No. I write.
782
00:44:57,797 --> 00:44:58,463
(Laughs)
783
00:44:58,565 --> 00:44:59,678
Don't we all?
784
00:44:59,781 --> 00:45:02,203
- Write what?
- Plays. Well, sort of.
785
00:45:02,309 --> 00:45:05,538
I guess you'd call them quietly
domestic plays set in India.
786
00:45:05,637 --> 00:45:06,749
Oh, cool.
787
00:45:06,853 --> 00:45:07,780
Yeah, I tried to find a job
788
00:45:07,877 --> 00:45:09,665
that would occupy
the least amount of mental space
789
00:45:09,764 --> 00:45:11,673
and be so opposite
my true aesthetic intentions
790
00:45:11,781 --> 00:45:13,788
that it wouldn't get in the way,
you know?
791
00:45:13,892 --> 00:45:15,168
ELIZA:
Does that work for you?
792
00:45:15,268 --> 00:45:16,959
MIKESH:
Most of the time.
793
00:45:17,059 --> 00:45:20,834
How do you do this every day?
I'm winded, man.
794
00:45:20,931 --> 00:45:22,240
Lightweight.
795
00:45:24,003 --> 00:45:26,654
ELIZA:
My daughter is a nicotine Nazi.
796
00:45:26,754 --> 00:45:30,583
They do all this anti-smoking
propaganda in school,
797
00:45:30,690 --> 00:45:31,900
which is good, I guess,
798
00:45:32,002 --> 00:45:36,224
but my position
is everything in moderation,
799
00:45:36,322 --> 00:45:40,958
which is hard to explain to a kid,
you know?
800
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:43,993
Excuse me one sec.
801
00:45:44,097 --> 00:45:44,598
Edith?
802
00:45:44,705 --> 00:45:45,653
(Knocks on Edith's door)
803
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:47,222
You okay in there?
804
00:45:47,328 --> 00:45:48,506
EDITH: Who is it?
805
00:45:51,199 --> 00:45:52,988
It's me, Eliza.
806
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:57,982
Got your juice.
Some food for Lady.
807
00:45:58,974 --> 00:46:02,008
Edith, do you need
something to eat?
808
00:46:02,110 --> 00:46:04,663
No, dear.
809
00:46:04,766 --> 00:46:06,621
What day is today?
810
00:46:07,357 --> 00:46:09,430
It's Friday.
811
00:46:09,533 --> 00:46:11,126
It's May 25.
812
00:46:11,709 --> 00:46:13,203
May 25, Edith.
813
00:46:13,310 --> 00:46:15,611
May 25.
814
00:46:15,709 --> 00:46:17,651
Okay, Edith. Got to go.
815
00:46:17,757 --> 00:46:19,928
Just right next door
if you need me.
816
00:46:20,029 --> 00:46:22,450
I'm right there. Bye.
817
00:46:24,284 --> 00:46:25,363
Wow.
818
00:46:25,468 --> 00:46:27,671
Wow, indeed.
819
00:46:27,771 --> 00:46:29,200
Well...
820
00:46:30,171 --> 00:46:34,677
Mikes, thank you for carrying
all this stuff up for me.
821
00:46:34,779 --> 00:46:37,200
You really saved me.
822
00:46:41,498 --> 00:46:42,229
Oh...
823
00:46:42,330 --> 00:46:44,369
Whew!
824
00:46:44,474 --> 00:46:46,863
I'll take that letter for Avery.
825
00:46:46,969 --> 00:46:48,311
Thank you.
826
00:46:48,409 --> 00:46:50,416
Thank you.
827
00:46:50,521 --> 00:46:51,349
Um...
828
00:46:52,921 --> 00:46:56,085
This was really nice of you.
829
00:46:58,136 --> 00:47:01,332
Um... Do you...?
830
00:47:01,432 --> 00:47:05,076
Well, you must be thirsty.
831
00:47:05,175 --> 00:47:06,604
Do you want a glass of water?
832
00:47:07,831 --> 00:47:08,724
Yeah.
833
00:47:08,823 --> 00:47:10,067
Okay.
834
00:47:10,167 --> 00:47:12,948
- MIKESH: Here, let me get that.
- ELIZA: Oh...
835
00:47:13,046 --> 00:47:13,907
You're so kind.
836
00:47:16,374 --> 00:47:17,137
All right.
837
00:47:19,094 --> 00:47:21,134
ELIZA:
Sorry for this heinous mess.
838
00:47:21,237 --> 00:47:22,546
MIKESH: Oh, no. I was...
839
00:47:22,645 --> 00:47:25,230
The view across your rooftop
is so poetical.
840
00:47:25,333 --> 00:47:26,827
You should see where I live.
841
00:47:26,933 --> 00:47:29,802
Bush wick, man.
It's a little grim.
842
00:47:29,908 --> 00:47:33,934
Well, you're, you're, what,
you're, um... how old?
843
00:47:34,036 --> 00:47:35,498
MIKESH: 22.
844
00:47:35,604 --> 00:47:39,117
Oh, you can deal
with Bush wick, then.
845
00:47:39,219 --> 00:47:41,902
When you get to be my age...
846
00:47:43,059 --> 00:47:43,953
44.
847
00:47:44,051 --> 00:47:45,807
Wow, well, you look fantastic.
848
00:47:47,250 --> 00:47:50,316
Actually, I'm not quite 44.
I'm, um...
849
00:47:50,419 --> 00:47:51,182
I just lied.
850
00:47:51,282 --> 00:47:53,802
I think I was hoping
that you just might say that.
851
00:47:55,858 --> 00:47:58,029
The point is,
when you get to be my age,
852
00:47:58,130 --> 00:47:59,853
the view becomes less poetical
853
00:47:59,953 --> 00:48:04,710
in relationship to other aspects
of living here.
854
00:48:04,817 --> 00:48:05,897
One door on, one door off.
855
00:48:06,000 --> 00:48:08,073
Is this some
kind of artistic statement?
856
00:48:08,176 --> 00:48:08,874
Uh...
857
00:48:08,976 --> 00:48:11,943
This is one of Avery's
renovation projects.
858
00:48:12,047 --> 00:48:15,244
Look closely, and you'll find
similar statements elsewhere.
859
00:48:15,343 --> 00:48:19,020
Like his perennially disorganized
personal library.
860
00:48:19,119 --> 00:48:20,973
MIKESH: He seems interesting,
your husband.
861
00:48:21,071 --> 00:48:24,104
Oh, he is.
862
00:48:24,207 --> 00:48:25,352
He's...
863
00:48:25,454 --> 00:48:28,902
He's eccentric, and I, um...
864
00:48:29,006 --> 00:48:32,934
I fell in love with those
eccentricities, you know?
865
00:48:34,414 --> 00:48:35,974
ELIZA:
But then you have kids
866
00:48:36,077 --> 00:48:39,111
and try to lead
what's called a grown-up life,
867
00:48:39,213 --> 00:48:43,403
and those sort of things become
obstacles to a sane existence.
868
00:48:43,501 --> 00:48:45,191
So you used to be a writer, too?
869
00:48:47,756 --> 00:48:49,349
Well, this is you, no?
870
00:48:51,403 --> 00:48:53,824
ELIZA: Yes, um...
871
00:48:53,931 --> 00:48:56,451
Or a version of me.
I'd really appreciate it if you...
872
00:48:56,554 --> 00:48:58,409
MIKESH: "She woke up
with the taste of blood in her mouth.
873
00:48:58,507 --> 00:49:01,224
The memory of the night before
hit her full force.
874
00:49:01,322 --> 00:49:02,467
Inexorable.
875
00:49:02,570 --> 00:49:03,911
Swift.
876
00:49:04,010 --> 00:49:05,897
Like fast water moving over rocks...
877
00:49:05,994 --> 00:49:08,066
...she was concerned that...
- ELIZA: Please stop.
878
00:49:10,953 --> 00:49:15,906
Yeah, that was my thing.
That kind of fiercely lyrical fiction.
879
00:49:16,008 --> 00:49:17,983
I got scholarships for it.
880
00:49:18,088 --> 00:49:21,470
I was considered to be
kind of an up-and-comer.
881
00:49:21,576 --> 00:49:23,714
I loved writing.
882
00:49:23,816 --> 00:49:25,409
I still do.
883
00:49:25,511 --> 00:49:33,279
It's just, you know,
when you have kids...
884
00:49:33,382 --> 00:49:36,415
I still write. Sort of.
885
00:49:36,518 --> 00:49:39,747
On more, um... everyday topics.
886
00:49:39,846 --> 00:49:41,756
It's just...
887
00:49:45,157 --> 00:49:48,026
How come you're being
so nice to me?
888
00:49:48,133 --> 00:49:50,336
I saw you go
to that woman next door.
889
00:49:50,437 --> 00:49:52,673
I saw you give her that juice,
very easily.
890
00:49:52,773 --> 00:49:54,682
Very selflessly.
891
00:49:54,789 --> 00:49:57,243
Why can't I be nice, too?
892
00:49:57,348 --> 00:49:59,901
Besides, you're very pretty.
893
00:50:00,004 --> 00:50:01,378
(Air escapes loudly)
894
00:50:01,475 --> 00:50:01,944
Um...
895
00:50:02,052 --> 00:50:04,899
- Tell me something else.
- About what?
896
00:50:04,995 --> 00:50:06,522
About being a writer.
897
00:50:06,627 --> 00:50:07,936
Oh, well...
898
00:50:08,035 --> 00:50:09,344
Um...
899
00:50:09,443 --> 00:50:13,239
I used to write record reviews
when I was first in college
900
00:50:13,346 --> 00:50:18,135
and after I graduated, for these
little downtown newspapers,
901
00:50:18,242 --> 00:50:23,293
none of which really exist anymore,
to get free albums.
902
00:50:23,394 --> 00:50:24,768
(Giggles)
903
00:50:24,865 --> 00:50:27,133
Vinyl!
904
00:50:27,233 --> 00:50:30,080
Yeah.
905
00:50:30,176 --> 00:50:34,398
Now I'm really dating myself.
906
00:50:34,496 --> 00:50:36,830
I mean, Avie was really into music.
907
00:50:36,928 --> 00:50:38,138
He turned me on to lots of bands.
908
00:50:38,240 --> 00:50:41,851
I mean, some you've heard of
and probably some you never have.
909
00:50:41,951 --> 00:50:42,583
Like what?
910
00:50:42,687 --> 00:50:45,851
ELIZA:
Oh, I don't know.
911
00:50:45,951 --> 00:50:47,773
Play me something.
912
00:50:47,870 --> 00:50:49,364
ELIZA: Oh.
913
00:50:49,470 --> 00:50:50,964
Really?
914
00:50:51,070 --> 00:50:52,793
Yeah.
915
00:50:52,894 --> 00:50:57,149
Um... Okay.
916
00:50:59,709 --> 00:51:01,465
Um...
917
00:51:05,469 --> 00:51:08,251
- You want to hear something great?
- Yeah.
918
00:51:18,075 --> 00:51:21,587
(Pylon's "Stop it" starts playing)
919
00:51:31,034 --> 00:51:34,197
So spare and basic.
It's Pylon.
920
00:51:36,248 --> 00:51:37,361
Turn it up!
921
00:51:37,464 --> 00:51:37,966
No, no, no.
922
00:51:38,072 --> 00:51:40,406
My downstairs neighbours
have this hideous tool,
923
00:51:40,504 --> 00:51:41,933
and they'll just start
banging on the pipes.
924
00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:43,633
Who cares?
925
00:51:49,432 --> 00:51:53,709
(Eliza raises the volume)
926
00:51:54,391 --> 00:51:57,521
(Eliza raises the volume even more)
927
00:53:07,342 --> 00:53:08,390
(Eliza turns music off)
928
00:53:08,495 --> 00:53:10,317
(Eliza breathes heavily)
929
00:53:10,415 --> 00:53:11,211
Fantastic!
930
00:53:11,310 --> 00:53:13,383
Yeah.
931
00:53:13,486 --> 00:53:15,308
It's great.
932
00:53:18,382 --> 00:53:20,170
Well...
933
00:53:21,133 --> 00:53:25,475
Oh, look, I got to get things
finished up around here
934
00:53:25,580 --> 00:53:27,140
before my husband gets back.
935
00:53:29,228 --> 00:53:32,675
But you've been a real life-saver.
936
00:53:32,780 --> 00:53:33,707
Yeah?
937
00:53:33,804 --> 00:53:35,844
Absolutely.
938
00:53:37,099 --> 00:53:39,554
Well, I'd love to read
your fiction sometime.
939
00:53:40,395 --> 00:53:42,085
Do you have anything more recent?
940
00:53:42,187 --> 00:53:45,602
No, not at the present moment.
941
00:53:45,706 --> 00:53:52,776
No, at the present moment,
my life is... extremely reality-based.
942
00:53:54,345 --> 00:53:57,989
But I do plan to get back to it
at some point.
943
00:53:58,089 --> 00:54:00,031
No, I mean, I will.
944
00:54:00,136 --> 00:54:03,584
As my favourite grad school
professor used to say,
945
00:54:03,688 --> 00:54:11,969
"There is no 'try,'
there is only 'do' and 'do not."'
946
00:54:15,623 --> 00:54:23,970
Well, Mikes, it's been
incredibly nice to meet you.
947
00:54:38,309 --> 00:54:40,064
Thank you.
948
00:54:44,387 --> 00:54:48,577
(Music plays)
949
00:55:12,736 --> 00:55:15,070
(Phone rings)
950
00:55:15,168 --> 00:55:17,307
SHEILA:
I cannot believe you!
951
00:55:17,408 --> 00:55:20,703
What, Sheila? What is it?
What did I do?
952
00:55:20,800 --> 00:55:22,905
SHEILA: Do you have absolutely
no sense of boundaries whatsoever?
953
00:55:23,007 --> 00:55:24,185
What are you talking about?
954
00:55:24,288 --> 00:55:27,516
SHEILA: You used my name!
You used my real name!
955
00:55:27,615 --> 00:55:30,298
Everyone who knows us
is now going to know!
956
00:55:30,399 --> 00:55:31,347
Know what?
957
00:55:31,455 --> 00:55:33,015
SHEILA: Do you have any idea
how embarrassing that is?
958
00:55:33,118 --> 00:55:33,750
Where are you?
959
00:55:33,854 --> 00:55:34,748
I'm here!
960
00:55:34,846 --> 00:55:37,334
ELIZA: Sheila, Sheila!
Hold on, I'm coming down!
961
00:55:37,437 --> 00:55:39,412
SHEILA: No, don't come down!
Don't fucking bother!
962
00:55:39,517 --> 00:55:41,688
Are you so hard up
for something to say
963
00:55:41,789 --> 00:55:42,520
that you have to use
964
00:55:42,621 --> 00:55:44,247
one of your closest friend's
most personal
965
00:55:44,349 --> 00:55:46,454
and private experiences
966
00:55:46,557 --> 00:55:49,044
just to make yourself
seem more clever and insightful?
967
00:55:49,149 --> 00:55:51,832
Oh, Christ!
Sheila, I didn't mean to!
968
00:55:51,932 --> 00:55:54,353
Yeah, but you did!
It doesn't matter, Eliza!
969
00:55:54,459 --> 00:55:56,826
Oh, God, I thought
other single moms would relate!
970
00:55:56,924 --> 00:56:00,240
Oh, so wait...
Now I'm your token single mom?
971
00:56:00,347 --> 00:56:02,387
No, no, no.
Other moms, too, okay?
972
00:56:02,491 --> 00:56:04,595
Married moms.
I mean, they can be sympathetic!
973
00:56:04,699 --> 00:56:06,673
Oh, they can feel sorry for me, too.
Well, that's great.
974
00:56:06,779 --> 00:56:08,470
So everybody
can feel sorry for me!
975
00:56:08,570 --> 00:56:10,163
I don't want anyone
to feel sorry for me!
976
00:56:10,267 --> 00:56:10,997
I'm a grown-up!
977
00:56:11,098 --> 00:56:12,658
I made a grown-up choice!
978
00:56:12,762 --> 00:56:15,925
And by the way, married women don't
have a whole lot of sex either...
979
00:56:16,026 --> 00:56:17,302
... and you should bloody know!
980
00:56:17,401 --> 00:56:20,848
I just...
I'm coming down! Just hold on!
981
00:56:20,953 --> 00:56:22,960
Don't come down, I'm lea...
I've got to go and get the kids.
982
00:56:23,064 --> 00:56:24,046
No, Sheila!
983
00:56:26,169 --> 00:56:28,950
Sheila, are you still bringing Clara?
984
00:56:29,048 --> 00:56:32,397
Because if you don't, then I've
got to arrange with Avery and...
985
00:56:32,503 --> 00:56:35,318
Of course I'm still bringing Clara.
What do you think?
986
00:56:35,416 --> 00:56:36,976
Oh, God.
987
00:56:37,079 --> 00:56:40,821
You think I'm going to punish a child
on her almost birthday
988
00:56:40,919 --> 00:56:42,348
just 'cause her mother's
got a big fucking mouth
989
00:56:42,454 --> 00:56:44,047
and no sense of discretion?
990
00:56:44,150 --> 00:56:48,111
Sheila, just please,
just don't judge me, okay?
991
00:56:48,213 --> 00:56:50,897
I mean, it's not your job.
I'm sorry, okay?
992
00:56:50,997 --> 00:56:53,004
I mean, I'm... I made a mistake!
993
00:56:53,110 --> 00:56:55,760
Yeah, you sure bloody did, babe!
994
00:57:01,589 --> 00:57:04,622
(Sad music plays)
995
00:58:03,437 --> 00:58:06,251
(Sighs)
996
00:58:13,837 --> 00:58:15,724
Seriously?
997
00:58:20,171 --> 00:58:21,960
MAN: Hey!
998
00:58:53,224 --> 00:58:55,078
(Cell phone rings)
999
00:58:57,063 --> 00:58:58,340
AVERY: Eliza...
1000
00:59:12,294 --> 00:59:13,374
(Raises volume)
1001
00:59:13,477 --> 00:59:17,787
(Madder Rose's
"Goodbye June Fool" plays)
1002
00:59:48,418 --> 00:59:50,109
(Cell phone rings)
1003
00:59:52,354 --> 00:59:53,302
AVERY: Eliz a?
1004
00:59:55,744 --> 00:59:56,638
(Cell phone rings)
1005
00:59:56,737 --> 00:59:58,144
AVERY: Eliz a!
1006
01:00:01,984 --> 01:00:03,358
(Cell phone rings)
1007
01:00:10,943 --> 01:00:11,510
What?
1008
01:00:11,615 --> 01:00:12,149
What the hell?
1009
01:00:12,255 --> 01:00:14,230
Why do you keep
hanging up on me, Eliza?
1010
01:00:14,335 --> 01:00:15,612
(Turns music off)
1011
01:00:15,710 --> 01:00:16,441
I'm not Eliza.
1012
01:00:16,543 --> 01:00:19,838
No, no, this is that woman who only
knows how to be banal, right?
1013
01:00:19,934 --> 01:00:21,112
What are you talking about?
1014
01:00:21,214 --> 01:00:23,417
If you don't even remember
writing that, Avery,
1015
01:00:23,518 --> 01:00:26,649
I'm not only leaving town,
I'm filing for divorce right now.
1016
01:00:26,750 --> 01:00:27,643
AVERY: Leaving town?
1017
01:00:27,741 --> 01:00:28,275
Where are you?
1018
01:00:28,381 --> 01:00:28,980
ELIZA: I just turned...
1019
01:00:29,086 --> 01:00:31,322
I'm on... I'm on...
1020
01:00:31,421 --> 01:00:32,947
You're breaking...
You're breaking up.
1021
01:00:33,053 --> 01:00:34,394
(Police sirens)
1022
01:00:34,493 --> 01:00:36,729
Oh, God! Shit!
1023
01:00:36,828 --> 01:00:38,388
I can't hear you.
You're breaking...
1024
01:00:38,492 --> 01:00:40,695
There's a cop, Avery!
I don't want a ticket!
1025
01:00:40,796 --> 01:00:42,170
We can't afford another ticket!
1026
01:00:42,268 --> 01:00:43,162
AVERY:
Okay, I know, I know.
1027
01:00:43,260 --> 01:00:45,169
Look, Eliza, you can't leave town.
1028
01:00:46,683 --> 01:00:48,177
Too late.
1029
01:00:48,283 --> 01:00:49,712
AVERY:
Why are you so upset?
1030
01:00:49,819 --> 01:00:52,022
You told me
to be honest about that thing.
1031
01:00:52,123 --> 01:00:54,294
Well, there's honest,
and then there's debilitating, Avery.
1032
01:00:54,395 --> 01:00:56,150
And apparently
you don't know the difference.
1033
01:00:56,250 --> 01:00:57,712
Maybe I don't know the difference.
1034
01:00:57,818 --> 01:00:58,996
I mean, just ask Sheila.
1035
01:00:59,097 --> 01:01:01,814
Her opinion of me is not much better
than yours at this point.
1036
01:01:01,945 --> 01:01:03,505
What does Sheila
have to do with this?
1037
01:01:03,609 --> 01:01:05,300
Don't even ask.
I have to steer.
1038
01:01:05,401 --> 01:01:07,638
AVERY: You know, you used
to like it when I was tough on you.
1039
01:01:07,736 --> 01:01:09,329
You wanted me to do that.
1040
01:01:09,433 --> 01:01:11,821
ELIZA: Well, somehow '"tough" got
a whole lot less appealing today...
1041
01:01:11,929 --> 01:01:13,903
...when I had to run around
absorbing an entire's city worth
1042
01:01:14,008 --> 01:01:14,990
of random hostility.
1043
01:01:15,096 --> 01:01:16,918
Well, it's not like you don't
radiate your own.
1044
01:01:17,016 --> 01:01:19,023
The point is,
I had something to write.
1045
01:01:19,127 --> 01:01:21,364
Something important to me,
if not to you.
1046
01:01:21,463 --> 01:01:21,932
AVERY: Yeah?
1047
01:01:22,039 --> 01:01:23,861
So why did you go shopping
with your friends?
1048
01:01:23,959 --> 01:01:26,479
Because it was the last day
of the sample sale!
1049
01:01:26,582 --> 01:01:28,949
And I got a 380-dollar dress
for 40 dollars!
1050
01:01:29,047 --> 01:01:30,541
That's why, Avery!
1051
01:01:30,646 --> 01:01:32,915
Maybe I should just give it all up
and wear mom jeans.
1052
01:01:33,014 --> 01:01:34,802
What the hell are mom jeans?
1053
01:01:34,902 --> 01:01:37,073
It's not like you'd notice, anyway.
1054
01:01:37,590 --> 01:01:40,045
You want to know
one of the few benefits of 9/11?
1055
01:01:40,149 --> 01:01:42,221
Excellent cell phone reception
in the tunnels.
1056
01:01:42,325 --> 01:01:43,699
AVERY: Okay, Eliz a?
1057
01:01:43,797 --> 01:01:46,033
Just stop, okay?
And listen to me.
1058
01:01:46,132 --> 01:01:47,277
This isn't funny, really.
1059
01:01:47,380 --> 01:01:50,729
What is Clara going to say when
she gets home and you're not there?
1060
01:01:50,836 --> 01:01:51,784
ELIZA: What does she care?
1061
01:01:51,891 --> 01:01:54,313
She's got her goody bags
full of plastic crap
1062
01:01:54,419 --> 01:01:56,142
I bought against my better judgment.
1063
01:01:56,243 --> 01:01:58,031
She's got her cake
with the misspelled name...
1064
01:01:58,131 --> 01:01:59,789
...which I corrected myself.
1065
01:01:59,891 --> 01:02:02,825
She's got her purple cups
and plastic forks.
1066
01:02:02,931 --> 01:02:04,392
What does she need me for?
1067
01:02:04,498 --> 01:02:05,742
Are you serious?
1068
01:02:05,842 --> 01:02:09,354
I'm not only serious, I'm in Jersey.
1069
01:02:09,458 --> 01:02:10,505
You're in why...?
1070
01:02:10,610 --> 01:02:12,398
Hold on, wait.
1071
01:02:12,498 --> 01:02:13,261
- AVERY: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- What?
1072
01:02:13,362 --> 01:02:14,572
- AVERY: Oh, my God!
- What?
1073
01:02:14,674 --> 01:02:16,266
I think he swallowed something.
1074
01:02:16,369 --> 01:02:17,384
- Hey, hey!
- ELIZA: Swallowed what?
1075
01:02:17,489 --> 01:02:19,529
Avery! Avery, what did he swallow?
1076
01:02:19,632 --> 01:02:20,876
I think he's choking!
1077
01:02:20,977 --> 01:02:22,220
Avery, don't push your finger
in his throat!
1078
01:02:22,320 --> 01:02:23,782
You can stick it down further!
1079
01:02:23,888 --> 01:02:25,197
Yeah, right! Well, what do I do?
1080
01:02:25,296 --> 01:02:27,303
Yeah, well, we took that class
together, don't you remember?
1081
01:02:27,407 --> 01:02:29,000
No, no, I don't remember.
What do I...?
1082
01:02:29,104 --> 01:02:31,438
You have to stay calm.
Avery, please, please, just...
1083
01:02:31,536 --> 01:02:32,681
Put him over your knee.
1084
01:02:32,783 --> 01:02:33,993
AVERY: I can't get him
out of the stroller.
1085
01:02:34,095 --> 01:02:36,233
ELIZA: Put him over your knee
and hit him three times on his back!
1086
01:02:36,335 --> 01:02:37,513
What do I do now?
I got him on my knee.
1087
01:02:37,614 --> 01:02:40,581
Hit him firmly on the back
three times!
1088
01:02:40,687 --> 01:02:41,221
Okay, hold on.
1089
01:02:41,326 --> 01:02:43,748
Oh, God! Come on!
Just spit it out, all right?
1090
01:02:43,854 --> 01:02:45,032
Avery! I can't hear you!
1091
01:02:45,134 --> 01:02:47,501
Come on! Come on, Lucas!
Spit it out, spit it out!
1092
01:02:47,598 --> 01:02:48,580
ELIZA: Avery?
What are you doing?
1093
01:02:48,685 --> 01:02:50,278
Avery?
1094
01:02:50,381 --> 01:02:53,163
Shit! Shit, shit, shit!
1095
01:02:56,333 --> 01:02:56,932
(Tires screech)
1096
01:02:57,036 --> 01:02:59,109
Oh, Lucas! Lucas, I'm coming!
1097
01:02:59,212 --> 01:03:02,179
Oh, my God! Lucas!
Oh, my God!
1098
01:03:02,284 --> 01:03:02,818
ELIZA: I'm coming!
1099
01:03:02,923 --> 01:03:04,712
Yeah, it's fine. It came out.
1100
01:03:04,811 --> 01:03:07,015
AVERY: It's fine,
it was just a lollipop in...
1101
01:03:07,116 --> 01:03:08,010
It's all right.
1102
01:03:08,107 --> 01:03:11,173
(Music plays)
1103
01:03:19,242 --> 01:03:21,543
What could possibly possess you
1104
01:03:21,642 --> 01:03:24,707
to give a toddler
a known choking hazard?
1105
01:03:24,809 --> 01:03:28,638
Don't lecture me, Eliza.
I could just as easily lecture you.
1106
01:03:28,745 --> 01:03:31,941
Really? For what?
For doing all the idiotic errands?
1107
01:03:32,040 --> 01:03:34,757
For listening to mothers in the park
who need to be medicated?
1108
01:03:34,856 --> 01:03:37,506
While you get to go to work
with real adults
1109
01:03:37,608 --> 01:03:39,550
and have normal
adult conversation.
1110
01:03:40,167 --> 01:03:41,858
Oh, yeah, like having Morris
ream me out
1111
01:03:41,960 --> 01:03:43,934
because I had to leave work
to take care of Lucas?
1112
01:03:44,040 --> 01:03:46,690
You mean those kind of normal,
adult conversations?
1113
01:03:48,038 --> 01:03:51,453
You got an envelope at home today,
by the way.
1114
01:03:51,559 --> 01:03:53,314
Some messenger guy delivered it.
1115
01:03:54,406 --> 01:03:56,958
Oh, yeah, right.
1116
01:03:57,830 --> 01:04:01,245
He...
1117
01:04:01,349 --> 01:04:03,967
He helped me
carry my bags upstairs,
1118
01:04:04,069 --> 01:04:06,272
and so I let him
come in for a while.
1119
01:04:06,373 --> 01:04:07,136
You what?
1120
01:04:07,236 --> 01:04:09,985
I let him come in,
and he blew up balloons.
1121
01:04:12,484 --> 01:04:15,004
You let a messenger
come into our apartment
1122
01:04:15,108 --> 01:04:17,475
and decorate
for our daughter's birthday?
1123
01:04:18,340 --> 01:04:22,049
His name was Mikes,
and he was just being nice.
1124
01:04:25,122 --> 01:04:27,642
He looked at me
like I was a person
1125
01:04:27,747 --> 01:04:31,456
who might still have something
worthwhile to say.
1126
01:04:32,738 --> 01:04:35,487
I always tell you that you have
something worthwhile to say.
1127
01:04:35,585 --> 01:04:36,632
You...
1128
01:04:36,738 --> 01:04:39,552
You need a stranger
to tell you that?
1129
01:04:39,649 --> 01:04:42,583
Was he good-looking or...?
1130
01:04:45,985 --> 01:04:50,806
He looked at me like I might still
be somebody worth looking at.
1131
01:04:53,439 --> 01:04:58,108
How could you not know
that you're worth looking at?
1132
01:05:04,702 --> 01:05:07,484
Were you attracted to him?
1133
01:05:08,446 --> 01:05:11,861
Were you?
1134
01:05:11,965 --> 01:05:17,300
It's just that you never look
at me that way anymore, Avery.
1135
01:05:20,604 --> 01:05:22,098
Do you look at me that way?
1136
01:05:23,836 --> 01:05:26,257
No, not really. Not enough.
1137
01:05:32,635 --> 01:05:37,391
But I still love you, Avery.
I really love you, but...
1138
01:05:37,499 --> 01:05:38,229
But what?
1139
01:05:41,242 --> 01:05:43,511
It's just that
1140
01:05:44,601 --> 01:05:50,765
every day from the second I wake up
till the second I pass out cold,
1141
01:05:50,873 --> 01:05:53,589
my day, like the day of almost
every other mother I know,
1142
01:05:53,688 --> 01:05:59,471
is made up of a series of concrete,
specific actions.
1143
01:06:00,248 --> 01:06:02,768
And they're actions that kind of
1144
01:06:02,872 --> 01:06:05,457
wear away at passion,
if you know what I mean.
1145
01:06:07,639 --> 01:06:09,842
The actions
are petty and small like...
1146
01:06:09,943 --> 01:06:15,180
Like refilling coffee cups
or folding underwear.
1147
01:06:15,286 --> 01:06:20,468
But they accumulate
in this really debilitating way
1148
01:06:20,565 --> 01:06:24,459
that diminishes my ability to focus
on almost anything else.
1149
01:06:25,685 --> 01:06:30,092
Bigger things like, you know,
ideas or...
1150
01:06:30,197 --> 01:06:36,972
...politics or dreams
of a better life.
1151
01:06:37,076 --> 01:06:38,734
Well, what would be a better life?
1152
01:06:43,955 --> 01:06:45,416
It wasn't always my ambition
1153
01:06:45,522 --> 01:06:51,239
to supervise a team
of fatuous liberal arts graduates
1154
01:06:51,346 --> 01:06:53,834
and edit their copy about travelling
1155
01:06:53,938 --> 01:06:56,785
to places that we can't afford
to visit.
1156
01:06:58,353 --> 01:06:59,760
When we had Clara,
1157
01:06:59,858 --> 01:07:06,022
I got a job with healthcare
and a little bit of flexibility.
1158
01:07:06,129 --> 01:07:10,319
It was a decision that we made.
We made the decision together.
1159
01:07:11,056 --> 01:07:13,838
So I got a job that I can tolerate.
1160
01:07:13,936 --> 01:07:17,797
No more, no less.
1161
01:07:20,303 --> 01:07:24,907
You're not the only one
who's made sacrifices, Eliza.
1162
01:07:25,007 --> 01:07:28,105
Well, that still doesn't explain
why you can't pick up your socks.
1163
01:07:28,206 --> 01:07:30,061
What do my socks
have to do with it?
1164
01:07:30,158 --> 01:07:32,547
Your socks have everything
to do with it!
1165
01:07:32,653 --> 01:07:34,627
(Eliza cries)
1166
01:07:36,525 --> 01:07:42,602
Eliza, all I wanted you
to do in that piece
1167
01:07:42,701 --> 01:07:49,989
was to stop hiding behind irony
because it comes so easily to you.
1168
01:07:52,427 --> 01:07:56,933
I want to know
what you really think.
1169
01:07:57,035 --> 01:07:59,009
I want to know
what you really feel.
1170
01:08:00,906 --> 01:08:07,365
What makes you want to live
a life with passion,
1171
01:08:07,465 --> 01:08:11,458
no matter how many socks
you have to pick up.
1172
01:08:15,529 --> 01:08:16,456
What about that?
1173
01:08:19,400 --> 01:08:21,156
(Children laughing and playing)
1174
01:08:21,256 --> 01:08:23,906
(Elizabeth Mitchell's "Jubilee"
plays)
1175
01:08:43,845 --> 01:08:44,958
AVERY:
Come on, Coupon.
1176
01:08:45,061 --> 01:08:47,363
Come on, get out.
1177
01:08:47,461 --> 01:08:48,836
Oh...
1178
01:08:48,933 --> 01:08:50,493
Does Coupon have to be out here?
1179
01:08:50,597 --> 01:08:54,819
Ah, no, but Bodhi
just tripped over him.
1180
01:08:54,916 --> 01:08:57,152
Oh, is that Bodhi crying?
1181
01:08:57,252 --> 01:08:58,594
Yeah, it is.
1182
01:08:58,691 --> 01:09:00,546
Is Lily crying back in his face?
1183
01:09:00,644 --> 01:09:02,945
Unfortunately, yes.
1184
01:09:03,971 --> 01:09:05,564
Oh...
1185
01:09:05,667 --> 01:09:07,576
Did Sheila come back?
1186
01:09:07,682 --> 01:09:08,795
Not yet.
1187
01:09:10,243 --> 01:09:12,152
Don't worry.
1188
01:09:14,370 --> 01:09:15,450
You were right, you know?
1189
01:09:15,554 --> 01:09:16,961
Unbelievable.
1190
01:09:17,058 --> 01:09:17,985
About what?
1191
01:09:19,042 --> 01:09:20,536
About this.
1192
01:09:21,249 --> 01:09:22,907
But I think I figured it out.
1193
01:09:23,009 --> 01:09:24,121
I just need a little more time to...
1194
01:09:24,225 --> 01:09:26,047
A couple more minutes,
and I'll be done.
1195
01:09:28,641 --> 01:09:31,062
Everything's under control in here.
1196
01:09:37,728 --> 01:09:41,917
Okay, and...
1197
01:09:42,943 --> 01:09:45,245
Mom, everybody wants cake now.
1198
01:09:45,343 --> 01:09:46,619
And there has to be
six purple candles
1199
01:09:46,719 --> 01:09:48,442
and one number six candle.
1200
01:09:48,543 --> 01:09:50,997
Okay.
1201
01:09:51,390 --> 01:09:51,891
Come here.
1202
01:09:53,917 --> 01:09:54,583
What are you writing?
1203
01:09:54,685 --> 01:09:55,547
Ooh!
1204
01:09:55,645 --> 01:09:57,467
Oh...
1205
01:09:57,565 --> 01:09:59,321
Just this thing.
1206
01:09:59,421 --> 01:10:02,454
It has to be done by midnight.
It's kind of important.
1207
01:10:02,556 --> 01:10:05,207
It means mommy
might get a real job.
1208
01:10:05,309 --> 01:10:07,697
But I don't want you
to get a real job.
1209
01:10:07,804 --> 01:10:11,000
Why not?
It's good when mommies work.
1210
01:10:11,100 --> 01:10:12,528
It keeps mommies happy.
1211
01:10:12,636 --> 01:10:16,312
It keeps them from being mean,
nasty, yelling mommies.
1212
01:10:16,411 --> 01:10:19,640
What about daddies?
Should daddies not work, too?
1213
01:10:19,739 --> 01:10:22,226
Why moms and not dads, hmm?
1214
01:10:22,331 --> 01:10:23,825
Enlighten me.
1215
01:10:23,930 --> 01:10:28,272
'Cause moms do everything.
Dads only do some things.
1216
01:10:28,378 --> 01:10:29,425
It's different.
1217
01:10:29,529 --> 01:10:30,063
(Cat meows)
1218
01:10:30,170 --> 01:10:31,795
Oh, hi, Lady.
1219
01:10:34,265 --> 01:10:35,792
(Cat continues meowing)
1220
01:10:35,897 --> 01:10:38,547
Mom, for my seventh birthday,
can I get a cat?
1221
01:10:38,649 --> 01:10:39,990
Mm...
1222
01:10:40,088 --> 01:10:41,332
Mom, can I?
1223
01:10:41,432 --> 01:10:45,393
EDITH:
Lady? Lady, where are you?
1224
01:10:45,495 --> 01:10:46,291
Mom?
1225
01:10:46,392 --> 01:10:50,799
"Maybe" is the best I can do, okay?
1226
01:10:50,967 --> 01:10:54,480
ELIZA: No peeking!
1227
01:10:56,183 --> 01:10:58,354
Here it comes!
1228
01:10:58,455 --> 01:11:01,324
(Children giggle)
1229
01:11:04,982 --> 01:11:09,259
(All sing "Happy Birthday,"
cha-cha-cha version, to Clara)
1230
01:11:27,987 --> 01:11:29,645
ALL, CHANTING:
Are ya 1?
1231
01:11:29,746 --> 01:11:30,859
Are ya 2?
1232
01:11:30,962 --> 01:11:32,336
Are ya 3?
1233
01:11:32,434 --> 01:11:34,190
Are ya 4?
1234
01:11:34,291 --> 01:11:35,567
Are ya 5?
1235
01:11:35,666 --> 01:11:37,673
Noooooooo!
1236
01:11:37,778 --> 01:11:39,436
You're 6!
1237
01:11:39,538 --> 01:11:41,163
You're 6!
1238
01:11:41,265 --> 01:11:44,232
("Georgia Porgies" plays)
1239
01:11:50,416 --> 01:11:54,158
(Kids chant
"Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star")
1240
01:11:54,256 --> 01:11:56,808
(Song and chant
continue simultaneously)
1241
01:11:59,663 --> 01:12:01,256
AVERY: Squeeze her again!
1242
01:12:02,063 --> 01:12:05,412
(Pipes clang)
1243
01:12:05,518 --> 01:12:09,741
Oh, come on, you moron!
It's not even 7:00!
1244
01:12:09,838 --> 01:12:12,740
It's a little girl's birthday party!
1245
01:12:12,846 --> 01:12:17,253
Clara, Clara,
can you turn it down just a little?
1246
01:12:18,765 --> 01:12:21,667
The parties we used to have
in this building, dear.
1247
01:12:21,773 --> 01:12:23,562
I can't tell you.
1248
01:12:23,661 --> 01:12:29,028
Everyone would drink gin
and smoke reefer
1249
01:12:29,132 --> 01:12:34,533
and dance and talk until dawn.
1250
01:12:34,636 --> 01:12:36,523
We used to argue a lot, too.
1251
01:12:36,620 --> 01:12:38,888
This was a very political crowd,
1252
01:12:38,987 --> 01:12:43,624
very serious about their positions,
don't you know.
1253
01:12:43,722 --> 01:12:47,366
No one would have dreamed
of complaining then.
1254
01:12:51,593 --> 01:12:53,600
Clara, crank it up!
1255
01:12:53,706 --> 01:12:54,338
(Volume rises)
1256
01:12:54,441 --> 01:12:55,903
Come on, everybody, let's jump!
1257
01:12:56,009 --> 01:12:58,660
Jump as hard as you can!
Jump up and down!
1258
01:12:58,761 --> 01:13:00,322
Jump, jump, jump!
1259
01:13:00,425 --> 01:13:02,465
(The children scream)
1260
01:13:02,568 --> 01:13:04,095
Come on, everybody, let's go!
1261
01:13:09,608 --> 01:13:12,706
(Water pours)
1262
01:13:14,215 --> 01:13:15,808
So your party's a big success.
1263
01:13:18,886 --> 01:13:22,464
Well, until someone starts bleeding,
I'd have to agree.
1264
01:13:25,094 --> 01:13:27,395
Sheila, I just...
1265
01:13:30,182 --> 01:13:32,637
I am so incredibly sorry
I hurt you.
1266
01:13:34,469 --> 01:13:37,502
Look, I do remember
uttering the distinct phrase,
1267
01:13:37,605 --> 01:13:39,034
"This does not leave this room."
1268
01:13:40,676 --> 01:13:44,156
And by that I meant, "Do not use
this episode for your own ends."
1269
01:13:48,516 --> 01:13:50,076
Be that as it may,
1270
01:13:50,179 --> 01:13:51,586
we always promised
that we'd tell each other
1271
01:13:51,683 --> 01:13:55,130
the minute we got pissed off,
and that's just what I did.
1272
01:13:57,218 --> 01:13:59,803
All right, steady on, steady on.
Hair on the lip gloss.
1273
01:13:59,906 --> 01:14:01,793
I was just telling you
when I was pissed off
1274
01:14:01,890 --> 01:14:03,897
when it actually happened.
1275
01:14:04,001 --> 01:14:05,889
I know.
1276
01:14:05,985 --> 01:14:09,727
You were just so funny about it,
you know?
1277
01:14:09,825 --> 01:14:11,897
I just...
1278
01:14:12,001 --> 01:14:13,408
I didn't think.
1279
01:14:13,504 --> 01:14:17,727
Oh, but you always
have to think, Eliza.
1280
01:14:17,824 --> 01:14:20,442
Oh, bloody hell.
1281
01:14:20,544 --> 01:14:22,518
My midwife told me
if I carry on eating sugar
1282
01:14:22,624 --> 01:14:23,736
all through my third trimester,
1283
01:14:23,840 --> 01:14:27,188
I'm going to give birth
to a 10-pound behemoth, maybe 12.
1284
01:14:27,295 --> 01:14:30,328
That would be extremely
uncomfortable to push out vaginally.
1285
01:14:30,431 --> 01:14:31,892
Don't say "vaginally."
1286
01:14:31,998 --> 01:14:34,616
(They laugh)
1287
01:14:43,933 --> 01:14:49,399
You did a stupendous job
pulling everything together today.
1288
01:14:49,501 --> 01:14:51,988
I did, didn't I?
1289
01:14:53,532 --> 01:14:54,874
I hope you don't mind,
1290
01:14:54,972 --> 01:14:58,419
'cause I know how you feel
about these things, but...
1291
01:14:58,523 --> 01:15:03,312
I did get Clara the purple
iPod shuffle that she wanted.
1292
01:15:03,419 --> 01:15:05,491
You did?
1293
01:15:05,595 --> 01:15:08,594
That's kind of an expensive
present for a 6-year-old.
1294
01:15:08,699 --> 01:15:12,473
I mean, it's not really
in our economy, is it?
1295
01:15:12,570 --> 01:15:14,163
It's in our economy today.
1296
01:15:16,218 --> 01:15:18,803
The envelope,
came with the messenger.
1297
01:15:18,906 --> 01:15:21,720
Your friend, Mikes?
1298
01:15:23,256 --> 01:15:24,718
You didn't open it, did you?
1299
01:15:25,752 --> 01:15:27,956
It was addressed to you.
1300
01:15:43,351 --> 01:15:46,547
This is a check
for 24,000 dollars, Avery.
1301
01:15:50,966 --> 01:15:52,275
What did you do?
1302
01:15:54,933 --> 01:15:56,972
You know those books
that were being thrown out today?
1303
01:15:58,932 --> 01:16:03,340
One of them happened to be
a copy of Emerson's essays.
1304
01:16:03,444 --> 01:16:08,495
A first edition, which as you know,
is incredibly rare.
1305
01:16:08,596 --> 01:16:12,850
And this first edition also happened
to be inscribed,
1306
01:16:12,947 --> 01:16:15,086
which significantly upped the value,
1307
01:16:15,187 --> 01:16:19,976
so I took it to Odyssey,
and I sold it.
1308
01:16:21,938 --> 01:16:24,174
But you love Emerson.
1309
01:16:24,274 --> 01:16:26,216
You love that book!
1310
01:16:27,377 --> 01:16:29,003
You didn't want to keep it?
1311
01:16:29,105 --> 01:16:31,952
Yeah, of course I wanted to keep it.
1312
01:16:33,584 --> 01:16:35,886
I even had a messenger
over the check.
1313
01:16:35,985 --> 01:16:38,952
Seemed kind of classy.
1314
01:16:41,488 --> 01:16:46,703
I figured it's probably enough
to pay for Lucas' preschool
1315
01:16:46,799 --> 01:16:47,944
for a couple of years.
1316
01:16:49,807 --> 01:16:52,490
And maybe even a dishwasher.
1317
01:16:53,390 --> 01:16:58,124
Because I want you
to take some time and write.
1318
01:16:58,798 --> 01:17:05,059
Your "mom-oar," whatever the hell
you call it, or something else.
1319
01:17:05,421 --> 01:17:14,247
This is...
This is for you, because you...
1320
01:17:20,236 --> 01:17:21,446
Oh, Avery!
1321
01:17:21,547 --> 01:17:24,995
(Soft music plays)
1322
01:17:48,808 --> 01:17:52,386
Wait, put this somewhere safe.
1323
01:17:52,488 --> 01:17:55,106
I'll do it.
1324
01:18:06,471 --> 01:18:10,627
ELIZA: Motherhood is about accepting
the limitations of time and energy,
1325
01:18:10,726 --> 01:18:12,253
which stretch beyond you,
1326
01:18:12,357 --> 01:18:15,586
even if sometimes it feels
they could consume you.
1327
01:18:15,685 --> 01:18:19,613
Search for and hold on
to your own true self.
1328
01:18:19,717 --> 01:18:22,652
If you lose that,
what kind of mother can you be?
1329
01:18:23,620 --> 01:18:24,994
Things are always changing,
1330
01:18:25,092 --> 01:18:29,499
no matter how much we might
want things to stay the same.
1331
01:18:29,604 --> 01:18:31,775
You could take a picture
of your kids every single day,
1332
01:18:31,876 --> 01:18:36,545
and every single day,
they'd just be getting older.
1333
01:18:37,315 --> 01:18:38,809
That's a fact.
1334
01:18:38,915 --> 01:18:41,370
A heartbreaking fact.
1335
01:18:41,474 --> 01:18:43,296
But still a fact.
1336
01:18:43,394 --> 01:18:47,006
So seize your days
and dwell in them fully.
1337
01:18:47,105 --> 01:18:48,152
Look to your children
1338
01:18:48,258 --> 01:18:50,778
because they know how to inhabit
brief periods of time
1339
01:18:50,882 --> 01:18:53,216
with extreme passion.
1340
01:18:53,313 --> 01:18:57,437
And for nothing more, really,
than the sake of those moments.
1341
01:18:57,537 --> 01:19:03,003
They can help you remember that,
if you only slow down and let them.
1342
01:19:07,935 --> 01:19:14,045
Feel fortunate because chances
are good you actually might be.
1343
01:19:22,110 --> 01:19:25,012
Mommy, mommy, mommy,
it's raining outside! Come quick!
1344
01:19:26,046 --> 01:19:27,736
All right.
1345
01:19:30,269 --> 01:19:32,057
Come on!
1346
01:19:32,925 --> 01:19:36,503
- LUCAS: It's raining outside!
- ELIZA: It is?
1347
01:19:36,605 --> 01:19:38,197
- CLARA: It's raining!
- ELIZA: Wow!
1348
01:19:38,300 --> 01:19:40,918
Lucas, go get daddy!
Go get daddy!
1349
01:19:41,019 --> 01:19:44,565
Here, sweetie, come on.
1350
01:19:44,667 --> 01:19:47,983
It's special movie rain...
for your birthday.
1351
01:19:48,091 --> 01:19:49,913
(Rainfall)
1352
01:19:50,010 --> 01:19:51,439
(Eliza laughs)
1353
01:19:51,547 --> 01:19:52,626
Wow!
1354
01:19:52,730 --> 01:19:53,199
(Loud splash)
1355
01:19:53,306 --> 01:19:58,095
MAN: Whoa!
Oh, my God, it's piss!
1356
01:19:58,202 --> 01:19:59,095
(They laugh)
1357
01:19:59,194 --> 01:20:00,121
Come out of here!
1358
01:20:00,217 --> 01:20:02,967
HESTER:
Don't say I didn't warn ya!
1359
01:20:03,065 --> 01:20:03,894
ELIZA: Go, Hester!
1360
01:20:03,994 --> 01:20:05,455
WOMAN: Sound speed!
1361
01:20:05,561 --> 01:20:06,455
MAN #2: Speeding.
1362
01:20:06,553 --> 01:20:08,113
MAN #3:
And, action!
1363
01:20:10,488 --> 01:20:11,765
Come here!
1364
01:20:11,864 --> 01:20:14,766
AVERY: Whoa!
1365
01:20:14,872 --> 01:20:16,333
Look at the movie down there!
1366
01:20:16,440 --> 01:20:18,065
Can you see it?
1367
01:20:18,168 --> 01:20:20,720
CLARA: I'm soaked!
1368
01:20:20,721 --> 01:20:24,461
(Music plays)
94865
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