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1
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♪ Oh, this is gonna be
a groove for me ♪
2
00:00:30,334 --> 00:00:32,075
♪ It's gonna be a little
something different ♪
3
00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:33,337
♪ But we gonna give it
to 'em anyway ♪
4
00:00:33,337 --> 00:00:35,513
♪ Are you ready?
Come on! Ha! ♪
5
00:00:35,513 --> 00:00:37,820
♪ We wanna give out a present
to everybody this Christmas ♪
6
00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,865
♪ All around the world
7
00:00:39,865 --> 00:00:41,476
♪ For every man, woman,
boy and girl ♪
8
00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:42,738
♪ Are you ready right now?
9
00:00:42,738 --> 00:00:44,261
♪ Come one, here we go
10
00:00:44,261 --> 00:00:45,784
♪ Ah, I like it like that,
come on ♪
11
00:00:45,784 --> 00:00:48,178
♪ That's it,
all right, come on ♪
12
00:00:48,178 --> 00:00:50,441
♪ Oh-oh
13
00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:55,142
♪ Christmas presents
around the world ♪
14
00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:57,666
♪ Something mighty sweet
to see ♪
15
00:00:57,666 --> 00:01:01,365
♪ If only if I just had
16
00:01:01,365 --> 00:01:03,411
♪ A present for everyone
17
00:01:03,411 --> 00:01:07,284
♪ Under one great big
Christmas tree ♪
18
00:01:07,284 --> 00:01:09,112
♪ Every boy that wants
a brand-new toy... ♪
19
00:01:09,112 --> 00:01:11,114
Jacket. Jacket. Jacket.
20
00:01:11,114 --> 00:01:13,116
- Okay, see you later.
21
00:01:13,116 --> 00:01:15,684
♪ For every Johnny
that wants a car ♪
22
00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:19,905
♪ Every junior
that wants a mobile bike ♪
23
00:01:19,905 --> 00:01:22,212
♪ That rides
and rides and rides ♪
24
00:01:23,605 --> 00:01:25,607
♪ Now my little daughter
25
00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:27,739
♪ She wants a doll that cries
26
00:01:27,739 --> 00:01:30,786
♪ One that walks
and wipes its eyes ♪
27
00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:33,267
♪ And I see there's someone...
28
00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:35,573
Flaxman's Auction House.
29
00:01:35,573 --> 00:01:37,227
How may I direct your call?
30
00:01:37,227 --> 00:01:39,882
♪ Just to lean her head
in their arms ♪
31
00:01:41,579 --> 00:01:45,192
♪ What a Christmas present,
this Christmas ♪
32
00:01:45,192 --> 00:01:48,630
♪ Oh, what a gift you could be
33
00:01:48,630 --> 00:01:51,415
♪ You know if I could
just give out ♪
34
00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:53,591
♪ Christmas presents
to everyone ♪
35
00:01:53,591 --> 00:01:55,637
♪ Under one great big
Christmas tree... ♪
36
00:01:55,637 --> 00:01:57,552
I mean, obviously, it's not the
usual way of doing the pricing,
37
00:01:57,552 --> 00:01:59,902
but I figured if we give people
38
00:01:59,902 --> 00:02:01,773
a high percentage
of the money we make,
39
00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:03,427
they'll be more likely
to give us more things
40
00:02:03,427 --> 00:02:05,647
in the future, so...
41
00:02:05,647 --> 00:02:07,431
In the end, everyone wins.
42
00:02:07,431 --> 00:02:09,781
Have you told Flaxman?
43
00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:13,307
Uh, no. No, I just want
to finish it first.
44
00:02:14,308 --> 00:02:18,964
♪ Christmas presents
around the world ♪
45
00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:23,186
♪ Something mighty sweet
to see ♪
46
00:02:23,186 --> 00:02:26,407
♪ Only if I just had
a present for everyone ♪
47
00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:29,584
♪ Under one great big
Christmas tree ♪
48
00:02:31,455 --> 00:02:35,807
♪ Well, every boy that wants
a brand-new toy ♪
49
00:02:35,807 --> 00:02:39,376
♪ For every Johnny
that wants a car ♪
50
00:02:39,376 --> 00:02:41,204
♪ For every junior...
51
00:02:41,204 --> 00:02:43,685
- Ah, Mr. Flaxman.
- Bernard.
52
00:02:43,685 --> 00:02:45,295
This is Henry Hackford
53
00:02:45,295 --> 00:02:47,602
of the Metropolitan Museum
of Art.
54
00:02:47,602 --> 00:02:48,951
Uh, it's an honor
to meet you, sir.
55
00:02:48,951 --> 00:02:50,518
Nice to meet you, too.
56
00:02:50,518 --> 00:02:52,607
I'd like you to take him
through your new catalog.
57
00:02:52,607 --> 00:02:54,565
The Museum are
potential purchasers
58
00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:56,480
of many of your treasures.
59
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:57,916
Yes, right.
60
00:02:57,916 --> 00:03:00,354
Um, I'm just kind of late
for something. It's...
61
00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:03,748
Okay. Sure, sure.
62
00:03:03,748 --> 00:03:05,489
Oh, it'd be a pleasure, sir.
63
00:03:05,489 --> 00:03:06,795
Of course. Thank you.
64
00:03:06,795 --> 00:03:09,276
Thank you.
65
00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,713
Why are you
carrying such an ugly bear?
66
00:03:15,891 --> 00:03:17,588
It's a particular focus
on cartography
67
00:03:17,588 --> 00:03:19,242
and the natural world.
68
00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:22,506
I'm really proud
of the breadth and...
69
00:03:22,506 --> 00:03:24,682
range of pieces
we've got in this sale.
70
00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:27,424
Thank you.
71
00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:35,911
Work ye, Bernard. Work ye.
72
00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:33,577
Hello, Bernard.
73
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:35,971
Um, I-I'm so sorry.
74
00:04:35,971 --> 00:04:38,060
I-- Let-let me just
explain everything.
75
00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:40,628
I already know what happened.
76
00:04:40,628 --> 00:04:42,847
It was,
"Of course, Mr. Flaxman,"
77
00:04:42,847 --> 00:04:45,067
and work, work, work.
78
00:04:45,067 --> 00:04:46,982
And you missed
your daughter's birthday.
79
00:04:46,982 --> 00:04:48,418
I mean--
80
00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:50,594
Uh, yes, t-that's
pretty much it.
81
00:04:50,594 --> 00:04:53,118
Really, I'm so sorry, I ju--
82
00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:55,991
Okay. Should I wake her up
83
00:04:55,991 --> 00:04:58,341
so you can give her
your present?
84
00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:02,432
Yeah, uh, yeah.
85
00:05:02,432 --> 00:05:04,347
Yeah, yeah, of course, um...
86
00:05:04,347 --> 00:05:05,827
Uh, just give me one second.
87
00:05:05,827 --> 00:05:08,351
I just, uh, I just need to
sort something.
88
00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:21,364
Oh. Hey.
89
00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:22,974
Hey. Hey, sweetheart.
90
00:05:22,974 --> 00:05:26,456
Happy birthday!
91
00:05:26,456 --> 00:05:27,849
Huh? Okay. Yep.
92
00:05:27,849 --> 00:05:31,896
Um, well, I...
I got this for you.
93
00:05:32,897 --> 00:05:34,508
Groceries?
94
00:05:34,508 --> 00:05:36,640
No, no, uh, let me just
help you with that.
95
00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:43,386
It's a jewelry box,
golden jewelry box.
96
00:05:43,386 --> 00:05:44,866
Unbelievable, Bernie.
97
00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:48,522
I think it's stuck.
98
00:05:48,522 --> 00:05:51,133
Uh, oh, this is
your first antique.
99
00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:52,482
Isn't it pretty?
100
00:05:52,482 --> 00:05:54,136
Sweetie, why don't, um...
101
00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:56,181
you go to your room and pack
a bag for Grandma's, okay?
102
00:05:56,181 --> 00:05:57,705
Okay.
103
00:06:01,012 --> 00:06:04,451
Oh, Bernie.
104
00:06:04,451 --> 00:06:06,888
What are we gonna do? I, um...
105
00:06:06,888 --> 00:06:10,718
I think I'm gonna take Eve
to my mom's like we planned,
106
00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:14,156
but, uh... I'm just gonna
need some time there.
107
00:06:14,156 --> 00:06:17,028
At least through
the holidays and...
108
00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:19,683
I-I think it's best
if you don't come.
109
00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:22,686
What?
110
00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:24,601
Julie, no-- please,
y-you're kidding.
111
00:06:24,601 --> 00:06:25,733
Please be kidding.
112
00:06:25,733 --> 00:06:27,865
No, Bernie, I am so not kidding.
113
00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:30,999
This is the least funny
conversation of my life.
114
00:06:30,999 --> 00:06:33,784
It's been going on
for such a long time.
115
00:06:33,784 --> 00:06:35,046
It's like...
116
00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:37,005
It's like you've
forgotten who we are.
117
00:06:37,005 --> 00:06:38,615
And what a family means. And I--
118
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:41,139
I'm really sorry about the box.
119
00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:44,621
What she really wanted for
her birthday was a dollhouse.
120
00:06:44,621 --> 00:06:47,668
Though I'm sure an hour of
her dad's undivided attention
121
00:06:47,668 --> 00:06:49,452
would've been just as good.
122
00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:53,500
Bernie, it is one thing
to drop the ball with me,
123
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:54,849
but with Eve?
124
00:07:00,158 --> 00:07:02,030
I'll be back, okay?
125
00:07:03,901 --> 00:07:05,555
You missed my birthday.
126
00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:08,123
Oh, I'm--
I'm so sorry, sweetheart.
127
00:07:08,123 --> 00:07:11,256
Mom says you're
a selfish bastard.
128
00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:13,824
S-She was joking.
129
00:07:15,217 --> 00:07:16,958
Well, d-darling...
130
00:07:16,958 --> 00:07:20,788
♪ Bells will be ringing
131
00:07:20,788 --> 00:07:23,878
♪ The glad, glad news
132
00:07:23,878 --> 00:07:27,795
♪ Oh, what a Christmas
133
00:07:28,796 --> 00:07:31,886
♪ To have the blues
134
00:07:33,627 --> 00:07:35,890
♪ My baby's gone
135
00:07:35,890 --> 00:07:37,935
- ♪ I have no friends
136
00:07:37,935 --> 00:07:40,111
Come in.
137
00:07:40,111 --> 00:07:42,766
♪ Please come home
for Christmas... ♪
138
00:07:42,766 --> 00:07:46,204
Bernard. Sit ye. Sit ye.
139
00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:48,032
♪ Once again.
140
00:07:48,032 --> 00:07:51,601
Thank you for taking me
through the catalog last night.
141
00:07:51,601 --> 00:07:54,256
It was very eye-opening.
142
00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:55,953
Well, I'm glad
it was for you, sir.
143
00:07:55,953 --> 00:07:57,738
I have to say, it was
a complete disaster for me.
144
00:07:57,738 --> 00:07:59,566
Oh, dear.
145
00:07:59,566 --> 00:08:01,655
By the time
I got home yesterday,
146
00:08:01,655 --> 00:08:03,831
I'd missed
my daughter's birthday.
147
00:08:03,831 --> 00:08:06,050
And then, my wife,
148
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:09,532
uh, she decided
that she was gonna...
149
00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:13,667
well, sort of move out
for a bit.
150
00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:15,320
That's terrible.
151
00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:19,499
I need to find a way right now
t-to make things right.
152
00:08:20,369 --> 00:08:22,545
What I'm trying to say
is I-I'm gonna need
153
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,895
more than just the holidays off.
154
00:08:24,895 --> 00:08:27,028
I'm gonna need a few more weeks
155
00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:28,638
to fight for my marriage.
156
00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:29,987
Mm.
157
00:08:29,987 --> 00:08:31,554
Yes, of course you are.
158
00:08:31,554 --> 00:08:32,686
Oh.
159
00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:33,991
Really? Oh, thank you, sir.
160
00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:36,167
Will that be enough, though?
161
00:08:36,167 --> 00:08:38,561
I-I honestly don't know, sir.
I hope so.
162
00:08:38,561 --> 00:08:40,824
And what if we take it
one step further?
163
00:08:40,824 --> 00:08:43,000
What if we extend
this sabbatical
164
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,177
to say, I don't know, 12 months?
165
00:08:46,177 --> 00:08:48,963
And after that,
another 12 months.
166
00:08:48,963 --> 00:08:50,878
And then another 12 months.
167
00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:55,012
Are you-- are you suggesting
I take three years off?
168
00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:57,101
Five years. Ten years!
169
00:08:57,101 --> 00:08:58,929
Let's go nuts!
170
00:08:58,929 --> 00:09:01,323
All right. It sort of sounds
like you're firing me, sir.
171
00:09:01,323 --> 00:09:04,195
Yes, I suppose I am.
172
00:09:05,762 --> 00:09:07,677
You're a very evil person, sir.
173
00:09:07,677 --> 00:09:10,811
Or a very clever businessman.
174
00:09:10,811 --> 00:09:13,857
And you'll have years
to decide which.
175
00:09:34,661 --> 00:09:36,097
Bernie.
176
00:09:36,097 --> 00:09:37,359
Hey, Lenny.
177
00:09:37,359 --> 00:09:38,882
What do you think?
178
00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:40,057
They let me spruce
the place up a bit.
179
00:09:40,057 --> 00:09:42,016
Seasonal. Everyone's included.
180
00:09:42,016 --> 00:09:43,974
Yeah, it's very nice.
181
00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:45,976
How you doing, man?
182
00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:48,675
Very badly.
183
00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:50,807
I can tell by looking at you.
184
00:09:50,807 --> 00:09:52,069
It's making me sad.
185
00:09:52,069 --> 00:09:53,984
Okay, well, sorry
to be a downer.
186
00:09:53,984 --> 00:09:55,943
No, no, you want to talk? You
want me to get another chair?
187
00:09:55,943 --> 00:09:58,075
You want to-- I g--
I'm reading this great book.
188
00:09:58,075 --> 00:09:59,381
This might be helpful.
189
00:09:59,381 --> 00:10:01,209
It's a book
about parallel universes.
190
00:10:01,209 --> 00:10:02,863
You know about this?
191
00:10:02,863 --> 00:10:06,736
There might be another you
in another universe,
192
00:10:06,736 --> 00:10:08,738
having a great life right now.
193
00:10:08,738 --> 00:10:11,175
Maybe think about that.
That's uplifting.
194
00:10:11,175 --> 00:10:12,742
Is it not?
195
00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,091
Do you-- What are you doing
for Christmas?
196
00:10:14,091 --> 00:10:15,440
You want to come over?
197
00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:17,312
You can hang out with the cats.
It's fun.
198
00:10:17,312 --> 00:10:20,141
You watch them, they fight.
There's one that lives outside.
199
00:10:20,141 --> 00:10:22,317
Y-You're very kind, but...
200
00:11:38,393 --> 00:11:41,135
Oh, my God!
201
00:11:41,135 --> 00:11:43,180
You'd think I'd get used to it,
202
00:11:43,180 --> 00:11:44,747
but I never do.
203
00:11:46,183 --> 00:11:49,056
Okay, no, no, no,
you stay back, just stay back.
204
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,535
I-I don't want to hurt you,
205
00:11:50,535 --> 00:11:52,276
but I will hurt you
206
00:11:52,276 --> 00:11:54,888
if you-- if you don't
get out of here.
207
00:11:54,888 --> 00:11:56,367
No, no, no.
208
00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:58,152
H-Help!
209
00:11:58,152 --> 00:12:00,284
Oh, no. It's fine. What do
you want? What do you want?
210
00:12:00,284 --> 00:12:01,764
Seriously, you can
take everything.
211
00:12:01,764 --> 00:12:03,897
Oh, you're just
wailing and crying
212
00:12:03,897 --> 00:12:05,376
like a little baby goat.
213
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:07,378
- Uh, I don't know what you're--
214
00:12:07,378 --> 00:12:09,337
I-I don't-- I wish-- I wish
I understood what you're saying.
215
00:12:19,782 --> 00:12:21,349
Is this better?
216
00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:23,960
Is it-- Yeah, I mean, yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
217
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:27,572
Okay. Then let's get to it.
218
00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:30,184
Your wish is my command.
219
00:12:30,184 --> 00:12:32,403
Yeah, okay, yeah, no.
220
00:12:32,403 --> 00:12:34,101
That's funny 'cause of the--
221
00:12:34,101 --> 00:12:35,450
I wish you'd stop
trying to kill me.
222
00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:37,800
Oh, this? No, this is--
223
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,802
That's just force of habit.
224
00:12:39,802 --> 00:12:41,891
Who are you?
How'd you get into my house?
225
00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:43,893
Oh, wh--
226
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:45,852
I was in the box.
227
00:12:45,852 --> 00:12:47,331
O-Okay, sure.
228
00:12:47,331 --> 00:12:49,159
Listen, uh, look,
I-I don't judge you,
229
00:12:49,159 --> 00:12:51,074
or whatever recreational
prescription drug
230
00:12:51,074 --> 00:12:52,989
of choice you've taken.
231
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:55,818
Just don't touch that. I-I need
you to get out of my house.
232
00:12:55,818 --> 00:12:59,169
Okay? Seriously,
how did you get in?
233
00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:02,390
Okay, I'm going
to talk slower for you.
234
00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:04,479
That box...
235
00:13:04,479 --> 00:13:07,221
that you were rubbing...
236
00:13:07,221 --> 00:13:10,006
I was in it.
237
00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:11,834
Okay, sure.
238
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:13,270
Sure, and how-- and how do you
239
00:13:13,270 --> 00:13:16,056
get inside a box
that's nine inches wide?
240
00:13:16,056 --> 00:13:18,841
Really good question.
It's a really simple answer.
241
00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:21,409
You know, classic setup.
242
00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,153
Angry sorcerer.
243
00:13:30,940 --> 00:13:32,333
You know, crazy eyes.
244
00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:34,204
- Pointed a finger at me.
245
00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:36,467
Puff of smoke. Spinning and
turning trough time and space.
246
00:13:39,557 --> 00:13:41,516
The next thing I know,
247
00:13:41,516 --> 00:13:44,040
I'm inside this stupid box.
248
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,346
Okay, wow, wow.
249
00:13:45,346 --> 00:13:46,869
I know!
250
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,305
Now, that's a strong move.
251
00:13:48,305 --> 00:13:50,264
The "I'm a genie"
home invasion excuse, that's--
252
00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:51,874
It's not an excuse.
253
00:13:51,874 --> 00:13:53,136
I am a genie.
254
00:13:53,136 --> 00:13:54,877
Right, yeah.
255
00:13:54,877 --> 00:13:55,965
- Right, right, right.
- Mm-hmm.
256
00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:56,966
Damn.
257
00:13:56,966 --> 00:13:58,446
I mean, the whole thing is--
258
00:13:58,446 --> 00:14:00,535
No, no, no, you-you...
259
00:14:00,535 --> 00:14:02,972
- Back off.
- Okay. All right.
260
00:14:02,972 --> 00:14:04,408
Let's just...
261
00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:07,977
You make wishes,
and then I make them come true.
262
00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:10,632
That's how
this whole thing works.
263
00:14:10,632 --> 00:14:12,939
Okay, so you're saying
you're an actual genie.
264
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:15,942
- Correct. We're like ghosts.
- Sure.
265
00:14:15,942 --> 00:14:19,336
Or-or dragons or unicorns.
266
00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:20,685
You know, it's like
you-you think we don't exist,
267
00:14:20,685 --> 00:14:22,383
and then you bump into one
and you're like,
268
00:14:22,383 --> 00:14:24,167
"Oh, hey. Oh, look at that.
A genie, genie, genie.
269
00:14:24,167 --> 00:14:25,212
Genies everywhere."
270
00:14:25,212 --> 00:14:26,517
Okay, well, you better get
271
00:14:26,517 --> 00:14:28,693
your next alibi ready
pretty quick.
272
00:14:28,693 --> 00:14:30,565
Okay, how about this?
Um, I-I wish...
273
00:14:30,565 --> 00:14:31,653
Bring it.
274
00:14:31,653 --> 00:14:33,350
...that my phone wasn't dead.
275
00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:36,005
A-And, oh, I know.
How about a camel?
276
00:14:36,005 --> 00:14:37,398
I wish I had my very own camel.
277
00:14:37,398 --> 00:14:39,008
Huh? That seems
reasonable, right?
278
00:14:39,008 --> 00:14:40,357
Sure thing, boss.
279
00:14:40,357 --> 00:14:43,012
It's whatever floats your boat.
280
00:14:45,406 --> 00:14:47,364
Okay, uh...
281
00:14:47,364 --> 00:14:49,366
I mean, that's
a coincidence. The...
282
00:14:49,366 --> 00:14:50,628
Hmm.
283
00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:52,195
Is that a coincidence?
284
00:14:57,461 --> 00:15:00,116
Okay, I-I-I take back
the camel wish. I take it back.
285
00:15:00,116 --> 00:15:02,379
Everybody always takes
the camel wish back.
286
00:15:04,512 --> 00:15:06,209
Oh, my God.
287
00:15:06,209 --> 00:15:10,039
T-That is
interesting, though. The...
288
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:18,221
I just don't want Eve
growing up with a dad
289
00:15:18,221 --> 00:15:19,962
who never seems
to put her first.
290
00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:22,051
I had to push back
at some point.
291
00:15:22,051 --> 00:15:24,227
- That's right.
292
00:15:24,227 --> 00:15:26,534
God, the problem
with Bernard is...
293
00:15:27,535 --> 00:15:29,624
And you know I still love him.
294
00:15:29,624 --> 00:15:32,453
But the problem is that
he thinks everything
295
00:15:32,453 --> 00:15:34,150
will just be okay in the end.
296
00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:35,456
Hmm.
297
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,461
He is my guy,
298
00:15:40,461 --> 00:15:42,419
but...
299
00:15:42,419 --> 00:15:44,987
he just won't live
in the real world.
300
00:15:47,076 --> 00:15:48,773
Wow. This is so cool.
301
00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:50,645
Oh, my grandma always
used to say,
302
00:15:50,645 --> 00:15:52,168
"You don't get nothing
for free."
303
00:15:52,168 --> 00:15:53,517
I wish she could see me now.
304
00:15:53,517 --> 00:15:55,302
Hello, Bernard.
305
00:15:56,607 --> 00:16:00,089
Oh, look at you.
You're as thin as a rake.
306
00:16:00,089 --> 00:16:02,178
Okay, on second thought,
no hard feelings, Grandma,
307
00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:03,310
I wish she couldn't.
308
00:16:03,310 --> 00:16:05,094
Got it.
309
00:16:05,094 --> 00:16:07,270
I-I did not like that.
310
00:16:07,270 --> 00:16:09,185
- Okay, so wait, am I...
311
00:16:09,185 --> 00:16:11,666
Have I blown it already?
Am I already out of wishes?
312
00:16:11,666 --> 00:16:14,103
No, keep at it.
313
00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:15,365
What about the whole
three wishes thing?
314
00:16:15,365 --> 00:16:17,280
Fairytale stuff.
315
00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:20,588
Real genies, unlimited wishes.
316
00:16:20,588 --> 00:16:22,111
Wow, we have to be very careful,
don't we?
317
00:16:22,111 --> 00:16:24,548
Uh, you do.
If you want my advice,
318
00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:27,464
I would say
use the words "I wish"
319
00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:30,032
with the caution that you
would usually reserve
320
00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:31,468
for "please castrate me."
321
00:16:31,468 --> 00:16:32,687
Just, you know.
322
00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,432
Oh.
323
00:16:38,432 --> 00:16:40,129
What?
324
00:16:40,129 --> 00:16:42,088
- Problem?
- What? N-No, no. Me? No problem.
325
00:16:42,088 --> 00:16:43,611
No, blow away.
326
00:16:43,611 --> 00:16:45,787
I-I just suppose a lot
of things have changed
327
00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:47,223
since you were last out.
328
00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:49,051
- Always do.
- Oh.
329
00:16:49,051 --> 00:16:50,444
It's different
every single time.
330
00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:52,228
Wow, so you've been
out of the box before?
331
00:16:52,228 --> 00:16:54,404
Oh, yeah. I mean, here
and there, yeah. But, I mean...
332
00:16:54,404 --> 00:16:56,493
I don't know,
from the looks of this place,
333
00:16:56,493 --> 00:17:00,062
I'm thinking, this time,
it's been a really long one.
334
00:17:00,062 --> 00:17:01,672
I mean, give or take
a day or two,
335
00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:03,457
if-if-if my dating on the box
is right... -Yeah. Okay.
336
00:17:03,457 --> 00:17:06,808
I'd-I'd say about...
2,000 years.
337
00:17:06,808 --> 00:17:08,331
2,000 years?
338
00:17:08,331 --> 00:17:10,507
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Okay.
339
00:17:10,507 --> 00:17:13,162
That's new information to me.
340
00:17:13,162 --> 00:17:15,251
- Is it?
- That's... Yeah.
341
00:17:15,251 --> 00:17:18,080
All right, well...
342
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:19,690
Let's just get to work.
343
00:17:19,690 --> 00:17:23,172
Just hit me.
You know, tell me what you want.
344
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:24,434
Is it girls?
345
00:17:24,434 --> 00:17:26,436
Gold? Golden girls?
346
00:17:26,436 --> 00:17:28,830
- Extra girls in gold, or what?
- Yeah, no, no,
347
00:17:28,830 --> 00:17:30,397
- come on. That's...
- Well, I mean,
348
00:17:30,397 --> 00:17:31,789
you don't have to be embarrassed.
349
00:17:31,789 --> 00:17:34,227
I know the score. You know?
I make you rich,
350
00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:35,793
you go live in a palace,
you get five wives,
351
00:17:35,793 --> 00:17:37,534
you start to get fat,
then you get mad at me,
352
00:17:37,534 --> 00:17:39,493
- and you put me back in the box.
- No, no.
353
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:40,668
You've actually got me
all wrong.
354
00:17:40,668 --> 00:17:43,236
Uh, money can't help me. It's...
355
00:17:43,236 --> 00:17:45,542
Uh...
356
00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:49,416
My wife and kid, they-they
just left for her mum's
357
00:17:49,416 --> 00:17:51,853
and looks like it might be
the start of a whole...
358
00:17:51,853 --> 00:17:54,160
a "trial separation" period.
359
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,639
What is-- What are we--
What is this?
360
00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:57,206
- What are we doing?
- Oh, no, nothing.
361
00:17:57,206 --> 00:17:58,816
And, uh, then my boss
went and fired me.
362
00:17:58,816 --> 00:18:00,731
Wow, that is "tough."
363
00:18:00,731 --> 00:18:02,255
Yeah, that's not really
how it w-works.
364
00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:03,560
Okay, well, I like it,
365
00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,214
and I've been in a box
for 2,000 years,
366
00:18:05,214 --> 00:18:06,911
so I'm just gonna keep that one.
367
00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:08,913
- Sure, okay.
- So, about your
368
00:18:08,913 --> 00:18:11,655
sleazeball "boss," um,
369
00:18:11,655 --> 00:18:13,135
do you want me to kill him?
370
00:18:13,135 --> 00:18:15,529
I'm kind of a sword
and slice gal.
371
00:18:15,529 --> 00:18:18,140
I just get in...
get it done.
372
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:19,315
Um...
373
00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:20,925
I will go with no.
374
00:18:20,925 --> 00:18:22,362
- Oh.
- I mean, thank you.
375
00:18:22,362 --> 00:18:24,581
Okay, that's too bad
'cause I'm...
376
00:18:24,581 --> 00:18:26,583
It's kind of like my specialty,
377
00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:28,672
- if you know what I mean.
- Sure.
378
00:18:28,672 --> 00:18:30,848
Okay. Hit me with it.
What do you want?
379
00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:33,851
My three big wishes
would be to-to get my child
380
00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:35,940
to love me again,
to get my wife to love me again,
381
00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:37,812
and for us all to be happy.
382
00:18:37,812 --> 00:18:40,597
Oh. Okay, uh,
383
00:18:40,597 --> 00:18:42,904
it doesn't work like that.
384
00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:46,168
Uh, wishes can't change
people's feelings,
385
00:18:46,168 --> 00:18:47,778
but, yeah, that's
386
00:18:47,778 --> 00:18:50,607
just kind of one of
the big rules. It's like a no.
387
00:18:50,607 --> 00:18:54,568
Okay, um... Right.
388
00:18:54,568 --> 00:18:56,178
- We've-- That's a problem.
- Yeah.
389
00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:58,441
Can I just ask, time travel,
can we do that?
390
00:18:58,441 --> 00:19:00,269
'Cause that could solve everything.
391
00:19:00,269 --> 00:19:02,315
Or is that not...
392
00:19:02,315 --> 00:19:04,317
That's a "no can do."
393
00:19:04,317 --> 00:19:06,319
No time travel. That's crucial.
394
00:19:06,319 --> 00:19:08,799
You would just destroy
the history of the world.
395
00:19:08,799 --> 00:19:10,410
I don't know,
maybe we can figure out
396
00:19:10,410 --> 00:19:14,196
some kind of plan
that would "encourage
397
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:17,199
your wife and child"
398
00:19:17,199 --> 00:19:20,202
to start to feel differently
about you. Right?
399
00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:22,813
Yeah, good. Good.
400
00:19:22,813 --> 00:19:24,293
- You're right.
- Yeah.
401
00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:25,990
- It's time for action.
- O-Oh, great.
402
00:19:25,990 --> 00:19:27,775
- It's time for action.
- Oh.
403
00:19:27,775 --> 00:19:29,864
- I like this.
- I-I wi-- Oh, by the way,
404
00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:31,474
- my name's Bernard.
- Oh, Bernard.
405
00:19:31,474 --> 00:19:33,824
- Yeah, Bernard Bottle.
- Bernard. Oh, Bernard.
406
00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:36,479
Bernard. Bernard Bottle.
407
00:19:36,479 --> 00:19:38,568
Maybe you ever--
You ever just go by "Nardo"?
408
00:19:38,568 --> 00:19:40,004
Uh... uh, I don't
409
00:19:40,004 --> 00:19:42,398
- personally, no.
- No? Okay, think about it.
410
00:19:42,398 --> 00:19:44,792
Uh, Flora Gwendolen Locheed,
411
00:19:44,792 --> 00:19:46,663
uh, Firepit McAllister.
412
00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:49,231
- Oh, beautiful name.
- Yeah. Oh, well, thank you.
413
00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:50,276
So nice to meet you.
414
00:19:50,276 --> 00:19:51,668
It's so nice to meet you, too.
415
00:19:51,668 --> 00:19:53,583
- Yeah. Okay.
- Yes.
416
00:19:53,583 --> 00:19:55,368
- That's good. Thank you.
- Oh, is that good? Okay.
417
00:19:55,368 --> 00:19:57,021
- Oh, got it. And then it stops.
- Thank you. Uh, yeah.
418
00:19:57,021 --> 00:19:58,022
- That's it.
- Got it.
419
00:19:58,022 --> 00:20:00,764
But I-I wish... I wish
420
00:20:00,764 --> 00:20:03,376
we were at my
mother-in-law's house.
421
00:20:03,376 --> 00:20:05,204
I can do that.
422
00:20:08,424 --> 00:20:09,991
- Okay. Yeah, that's--
423
00:20:09,991 --> 00:20:11,471
- It's a bit of a doozy.
- Yeah.
424
00:20:11,471 --> 00:20:12,689
All right, take a...
425
00:20:12,689 --> 00:20:13,777
- No, I'm good, I'm good.
- Okay, okay.
426
00:20:13,777 --> 00:20:14,865
- I'm good.
- All right.
427
00:20:14,865 --> 00:20:16,432
Oh, there she is.
428
00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:20,828
Okay, okay. What's the plan?
What're we gonna do?
429
00:20:22,830 --> 00:20:25,311
I-I don't know. I'm winging it.
Maybe this was a bad idea.
430
00:20:25,311 --> 00:20:27,530
- May-Maybe.
- Was it?
431
00:20:27,530 --> 00:20:29,793
It's better to have a plan
than not a plan.
432
00:20:29,793 --> 00:20:31,839
Okay, but you know what?
We're here now.
433
00:20:31,839 --> 00:20:33,928
So, let-let's
do something, okay?
434
00:20:33,928 --> 00:20:35,625
- Right?
- Okay.
435
00:20:35,625 --> 00:20:36,844
We're going back to,
you know, back in my day...
436
00:20:36,844 --> 00:20:38,454
- Right.
- ...when a man or a woman
437
00:20:38,454 --> 00:20:39,934
was trying to woo,
you know, someone, suitor,
438
00:20:39,934 --> 00:20:41,805
- whatever you want to call it...
- Sure.
439
00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:44,765
Mating dance.
You want to keep
440
00:20:44,765 --> 00:20:46,810
- this counterclockwise...
- Okay.
441
00:20:46,810 --> 00:20:48,072
...and this clockwise.
442
00:20:48,072 --> 00:20:49,726
Don't ever
sync them up together.
443
00:20:49,726 --> 00:20:51,511
I don't know if I-I can do that.
444
00:20:51,511 --> 00:20:52,816
Is that...?
445
00:20:52,816 --> 00:20:53,991
- Okay.
- Oh, God, no, she saw me.
446
00:20:53,991 --> 00:20:55,602
- She saw me.
- It's good.
447
00:20:55,602 --> 00:20:56,907
- You can talk to her.
- Ah. What am I gonna say?
448
00:20:56,907 --> 00:20:59,388
- Can't we just vanish?
449
00:20:59,388 --> 00:21:00,694
Bernard?
450
00:21:00,694 --> 00:21:02,348
W-What are you doing here?
451
00:21:02,348 --> 00:21:04,306
Hi. Um...
452
00:21:04,306 --> 00:21:06,917
I-- You know what?
I-I-I was just passing through,
453
00:21:06,917 --> 00:21:08,615
and I thought
I'd-I'd just check to see if
454
00:21:08,615 --> 00:21:10,399
- you got here okay.
455
00:21:10,399 --> 00:21:12,923
Who-who is this?
456
00:21:12,923 --> 00:21:15,404
- Flora.
- Um...
457
00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:16,840
This is F-Flora, yes.
458
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:18,712
- She's-she's a-a friend...
- Yup.
459
00:21:18,712 --> 00:21:20,017
...from work.
460
00:21:20,017 --> 00:21:21,845
Yeah, it's nice
to meet you, ma'am.
461
00:21:21,845 --> 00:21:23,978
Um, you know, we-- Uh...
462
00:21:23,978 --> 00:21:25,893
I do work with Nardo.
463
00:21:25,893 --> 00:21:28,417
You know, we go to
the workplace together,
464
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:30,550
and we-we do work things in our,
465
00:21:30,550 --> 00:21:32,073
in our work location.
466
00:21:32,073 --> 00:21:33,509
You know what the funny thing--
467
00:21:33,509 --> 00:21:35,598
The reason why
you look so awesome is--
468
00:21:35,598 --> 00:21:38,079
You just went to a Renaissance
fair, didn't you?
469
00:21:38,079 --> 00:21:39,602
Didn't you?
470
00:21:39,602 --> 00:21:40,777
- Didn't I?
- Yeah.
471
00:21:40,777 --> 00:21:42,431
Oh, yeah.
472
00:21:42,431 --> 00:21:45,956
Look, Bernard, I don't know...
what you're up to,
473
00:21:45,956 --> 00:21:48,872
but I-I think
you should go home.
474
00:21:48,872 --> 00:21:51,832
- Too much. Too weird. Get--
- Yeah.
475
00:21:51,832 --> 00:21:53,442
Go sleep it off.
476
00:21:53,442 --> 00:21:54,965
So nice meeting you.
477
00:21:54,965 --> 00:21:57,446
It's-- Uh,
I-I like your sweater.
478
00:21:58,926 --> 00:22:02,538
I think that went well.
479
00:22:03,887 --> 00:22:05,759
I wish we were back at my place.
480
00:22:11,112 --> 00:22:12,635
Think, Nardo.
481
00:22:12,635 --> 00:22:14,637
What is the way
to get to a woman's heart?
482
00:22:14,637 --> 00:22:18,641
Uh, love, kindness, consideration,
483
00:22:18,641 --> 00:22:19,947
offering to do the washing up...
484
00:22:19,947 --> 00:22:21,470
Okay. A-All of that's lovely,
485
00:22:21,470 --> 00:22:23,777
but, also,
486
00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:27,476
a massive sack full of gifts
is really good, too.
487
00:22:27,476 --> 00:22:30,392
Okay. We can crack this.
488
00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:32,742
Uh, are there any markets
near here?
489
00:22:32,742 --> 00:22:35,005
Yeah. I mean, sure, a few.
490
00:22:35,005 --> 00:22:37,051
I mean, this town's
pretty famous for its shopping.
491
00:22:37,051 --> 00:22:38,661
Oh, we're in a town?
492
00:22:38,661 --> 00:22:40,620
Yeah, quite a big one. New York.
493
00:22:40,620 --> 00:22:42,709
Oh, a new town.
Well, la-di-da-di.
494
00:22:42,709 --> 00:22:44,145
But, um, for now,
why don't we get some food?
495
00:22:44,145 --> 00:22:46,060
You must be pretty hungry
496
00:22:46,060 --> 00:22:47,801
after a couple of thousand years
in a small box.
497
00:22:47,801 --> 00:22:49,803
Uh, you can say that again.
498
00:22:49,803 --> 00:22:52,458
Well, uh, uh, I wish we had
499
00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:55,678
a large pizza
from John's on Bleecker,
500
00:22:55,678 --> 00:22:58,551
extra pepperoni, extra cheese.
501
00:23:00,553 --> 00:23:01,945
Ooh!
502
00:23:01,945 --> 00:23:03,077
Hmm.
503
00:23:04,078 --> 00:23:05,122
Ta-da.
Huh.
504
00:23:05,122 --> 00:23:06,950
Hmm.
505
00:23:06,950 --> 00:23:09,039
I mean, I-I don't want
to hurt your feelings, but, um,
506
00:23:09,039 --> 00:23:10,693
it just seems like things
507
00:23:10,693 --> 00:23:12,565
maybe were a little bit better
back in my day.
508
00:23:12,565 --> 00:23:14,871
We would wolf down,
like, a whole fresh deer,
509
00:23:14,871 --> 00:23:16,699
or snatch a salmon
right out of the stream
510
00:23:16,699 --> 00:23:18,222
with our bare hands
and just, ah.
511
00:23:18,222 --> 00:23:19,833
You know, this is, what?
512
00:23:19,833 --> 00:23:21,182
Okay.
513
00:23:21,182 --> 00:23:24,054
This is just a triangle
of red bread.
514
00:23:24,054 --> 00:23:25,795
Well, yeah, I-I mean,
I get what you're saying,
515
00:23:25,795 --> 00:23:27,101
but why don't you just
give it a try?
516
00:23:27,101 --> 00:23:29,016
- Really?
- Yeah, give it a go.
517
00:23:32,933 --> 00:23:34,935
- Mmm.
- Huh?
518
00:23:34,935 --> 00:23:37,503
- Wait a minute.
- Yeah?
519
00:23:37,503 --> 00:23:40,941
Wait an ever-loving minute!
520
00:23:42,072 --> 00:23:43,726
This is heaven.
521
00:23:43,726 --> 00:23:45,815
See? Some new things
are pretty cool.
522
00:23:45,815 --> 00:23:47,774
Uh, uh, this.
523
00:23:47,774 --> 00:23:49,819
- This is gonna blow your mind.
- Okay.
524
00:23:49,819 --> 00:23:51,125
Whoa. Uh,
that's not what I meant.
525
00:23:51,125 --> 00:23:52,039
Eh, that's not
really what it's for.
526
00:23:52,039 --> 00:23:53,040
It's not as good.
527
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:54,563
Really? Um, no.
528
00:23:54,563 --> 00:23:56,173
Just, uh, pick a song.
Hit something.
529
00:23:56,173 --> 00:23:58,480
That's not what I meant.
530
00:23:58,480 --> 00:23:59,742
Maybe a bit more gentle.
531
00:23:59,742 --> 00:24:01,744
Oh. What is it? Oh, "Spotifee."
532
00:24:01,744 --> 00:24:03,572
We call it Spotify.
Okay, just one.
533
00:24:03,572 --> 00:24:05,008
Gentle, gentle, gentle.
534
00:24:05,008 --> 00:24:06,096
- One line. Yeah.
- Oh, just one.
535
00:24:13,321 --> 00:24:14,844
Something wrong?
536
00:24:14,844 --> 00:24:17,891
No, something
is incredibly right.
537
00:24:17,891 --> 00:24:21,111
My-my ears were made
to hear this music.
538
00:24:21,111 --> 00:24:24,288
I mean... my wh-- my whole soul
539
00:24:24,288 --> 00:24:25,899
is... [stammers] soaring.
540
00:24:25,899 --> 00:24:27,683
Like a, like a flock
of flamingos.
541
00:24:27,683 --> 00:24:30,904
This new music is incredible.
542
00:24:30,904 --> 00:24:34,516
Yeah, actually, the music
isn't particularly new.
543
00:24:34,516 --> 00:24:35,604
It's actually pretty old.
544
00:24:35,604 --> 00:24:37,214
Why don't you try again?
545
00:24:38,999 --> 00:24:41,044
♪ Collipark, Bubba Sparxxx
546
00:24:41,044 --> 00:24:42,132
♪ Booty, booty,
booty, booty... ♪
547
00:24:43,307 --> 00:24:44,700
♪ Booty, booty, booty, booty
548
00:24:44,700 --> 00:24:46,572
♪ Rockin' everywhere
549
00:24:46,572 --> 00:24:48,225
♪ Booty, booty, booty, booty,
rockin' everywhere... ♪
550
00:24:48,225 --> 00:24:50,880
Hey, hey.
551
00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:54,014
Oh, yeah! This is even better.
552
00:24:54,014 --> 00:24:56,930
Whoo!
553
00:24:56,930 --> 00:24:58,540
♪ For 'bout a month or two
554
00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:00,107
♪ Put a tan on it then see
555
00:25:00,107 --> 00:25:02,588
♪ What it do, I found you,
Ms. New Booty... ♪
556
00:25:02,588 --> 00:25:03,980
Hey, can you,
can you not, please?
557
00:25:03,980 --> 00:25:04,981
Hmm, no?
558
00:25:07,549 --> 00:25:09,029
♪ For 'bout a month or two
559
00:25:09,029 --> 00:25:10,987
♪ Put a tan on it,
then see what it do ♪
560
00:25:10,987 --> 00:25:13,076
♪ Get it ripe, get it right,
hit it tight. ♪
561
00:25:13,076 --> 00:25:15,296
God, he must be
so lonely already.
562
00:25:15,296 --> 00:25:16,993
Don't panic.
563
00:25:16,993 --> 00:25:19,561
Look, silence and solitude
will make him realize
564
00:25:19,561 --> 00:25:21,345
what's really important
in this life.
565
00:25:28,614 --> 00:25:30,311
- Oh! Ah!
- Man, I don't think
566
00:25:30,311 --> 00:25:32,313
you get how good this music is.
567
00:25:32,313 --> 00:25:33,880
I mean, back in my day,
it was all, like,
568
00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:35,882
bagpipes and
hollowed out gourds.
569
00:25:35,882 --> 00:25:37,361
Yeah, sure, sure. Maybe we could
570
00:25:37,361 --> 00:25:38,841
continue this conversation
in the other room?
571
00:25:38,841 --> 00:25:41,104
- You got it, Nardo. Great chair.
- Great.
572
00:25:41,104 --> 00:25:44,760
Okay, sure. Do you want to
close... the door?
573
00:25:51,071 --> 00:25:53,856
I mean, wowzers!
574
00:25:53,856 --> 00:25:57,991
This place is big
and tall and-and busy.
575
00:25:57,991 --> 00:26:00,036
- Yeah, it certainly is.
- Whew.
576
00:26:00,036 --> 00:26:02,038
All right. Let's get to work.
577
00:26:02,038 --> 00:26:05,781
Yeah, um, just first,
I just wonder,
578
00:26:05,781 --> 00:26:08,001
maybe, should we, should we
do something about your clothes?
579
00:26:08,001 --> 00:26:09,698
- What?
580
00:26:09,698 --> 00:26:12,092
I mean, I can't get
more stylish than this.
581
00:26:12,092 --> 00:26:13,354
I just thought maybe
you might want to
582
00:26:13,354 --> 00:26:14,703
blend in a little better.
583
00:26:14,703 --> 00:26:16,618
Well, you got to do the thing.
584
00:26:16,618 --> 00:26:18,315
Oh, sorry. [chuckles] Uh, I...
585
00:26:18,315 --> 00:26:21,057
I wish you would
blend in a bit better.
586
00:26:21,057 --> 00:26:23,930
All right. Uh, let's see.
587
00:26:25,105 --> 00:26:26,628
Who do I-- Ooh.
588
00:26:26,628 --> 00:26:27,977
Well, they're killing it.
589
00:26:27,977 --> 00:26:29,979
Uh...
590
00:26:29,979 --> 00:26:32,895
I mean, can you even see me?
591
00:26:32,895 --> 00:26:34,854
This is like, I'm blending.
592
00:26:34,854 --> 00:26:37,334
You know what?
I would, I would keep going.
593
00:26:37,334 --> 00:26:39,380
Uh, okay. All right.
594
00:26:39,380 --> 00:26:41,338
Uh, no, no, no. Oh.
595
00:26:41,338 --> 00:26:43,602
She's perfection.
596
00:26:44,690 --> 00:26:46,213
I mean, this feels right. Right?
597
00:26:46,213 --> 00:26:47,214
Uh...
598
00:26:47,214 --> 00:26:49,216
You know,
599
00:26:49,216 --> 00:26:50,783
m-maybe third time's the charm?
600
00:26:50,783 --> 00:26:54,003
You're very picky, Nardo.
Very picky. Okay.
601
00:26:54,003 --> 00:26:55,701
Uh, let's see. Uh...
602
00:26:55,701 --> 00:26:58,921
How about eeny, meeny,
603
00:26:58,921 --> 00:27:01,010
miny, both.
604
00:27:02,142 --> 00:27:04,927
I mean, now we're talking.
Am I right?
605
00:27:04,927 --> 00:27:06,842
Yeah, uh...
606
00:27:06,842 --> 00:27:08,757
Yeah, I guess that--
It sort of works.
607
00:27:08,757 --> 00:27:11,020
Sort of works? I look fantastic.
608
00:27:11,020 --> 00:27:14,067
Come on. We got to get back
on task. Let's shop.
609
00:27:17,331 --> 00:27:18,724
You know what?
We can start here.
610
00:27:18,724 --> 00:27:19,942
Okay.
611
00:27:19,942 --> 00:27:21,335
- Welcome to Bloomingdale's.
- Oh.
612
00:27:21,335 --> 00:27:22,684
- How you doing today?
- Good.
613
00:27:22,684 --> 00:27:23,946
Enjoy your shopping.
614
00:27:23,946 --> 00:27:25,774
I wish we had
an all-expenses-paid
615
00:27:25,774 --> 00:27:27,167
shopping spree.
616
00:27:27,167 --> 00:27:28,995
Oh. Okay.
617
00:27:28,995 --> 00:27:31,258
Ooh.
618
00:27:31,258 --> 00:27:33,869
Oh, this is amazing.
619
00:27:33,869 --> 00:27:35,958
I've never seen
anything like it.
620
00:27:35,958 --> 00:27:38,134
Oh, wait, look.
621
00:27:38,134 --> 00:27:40,702
What do you call it?
622
00:27:40,702 --> 00:27:43,313
- Oh, sanitizer.
- Sanitizer.
623
00:27:43,313 --> 00:27:45,098
Mmm, it's zesty.
624
00:27:45,098 --> 00:27:47,404
- No, it's...
- Mmm.
625
00:27:48,928 --> 00:27:50,103
- No.
- Oh.
626
00:27:50,103 --> 00:27:51,974
Nardo, look what I found.
627
00:27:51,974 --> 00:27:55,804
Huh? I don't know what it is,
but it's really fun.
628
00:27:55,804 --> 00:27:58,720
I think Julie might love it.
Look, and...
629
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:01,157
Okay. Sorry. She's new in town.
630
00:28:02,332 --> 00:28:05,118
What is this? That's so pretty.
631
00:28:05,118 --> 00:28:07,424
- It's beautiful.
632
00:28:07,424 --> 00:28:10,863
Your presence is my present.
633
00:28:10,863 --> 00:28:12,429
Get it?
634
00:28:12,429 --> 00:28:14,736
- You need to stop.
Wait, wait.
635
00:28:14,736 --> 00:28:15,737
Oh.
636
00:28:15,737 --> 00:28:18,000
It's hard to run in these.
637
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,002
Pretty good haul, huh?
638
00:28:20,002 --> 00:28:22,004
- You think so?
- Yeah.
639
00:28:22,004 --> 00:28:24,485
I think Julie and Eve
are gonna be pretty excited.
640
00:28:24,485 --> 00:28:26,356
Well, I hope they are.
641
00:28:26,356 --> 00:28:29,142
- Oh, my God.
- What? What?
642
00:28:29,142 --> 00:28:31,361
I had just hoped that
by now that this
643
00:28:31,361 --> 00:28:33,450
kind of torture had stopped.
644
00:28:33,450 --> 00:28:35,365
This is a gym.
645
00:28:35,365 --> 00:28:37,150
They-they actually pay
to do these things.
646
00:28:37,150 --> 00:28:39,369
Yeah. Okay, good one.
647
00:28:39,369 --> 00:28:41,937
I will avenge thee!
648
00:28:41,937 --> 00:28:44,113
Okay, you need
to stop that. Sorry.
649
00:28:44,113 --> 00:28:45,985
I will avenge thee!
650
00:28:45,985 --> 00:28:47,551
- Sorry.
651
00:28:47,551 --> 00:28:49,815
And what would you like
for Christmas this year?
652
00:28:49,815 --> 00:28:51,207
Hey, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
653
00:28:51,207 --> 00:28:52,382
Why-why are all these people
standing in line
654
00:28:52,382 --> 00:28:54,080
to see Mr. Beardie?
655
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:56,082
Ooh, is he like the king
or an emperor or something?
656
00:28:56,082 --> 00:28:57,518
Uh, no, it's actually,
657
00:28:57,518 --> 00:28:58,998
it's just
the whole Christmas thing.
658
00:28:58,998 --> 00:29:00,390
Basically,
the guy with the beard,
659
00:29:00,390 --> 00:29:02,218
he flies around with
a bunch of reindeer.
660
00:29:02,218 --> 00:29:04,177
- Okay.
- Uh, he goes down the chimney
661
00:29:04,177 --> 00:29:06,832
and puts these presents
in these huge stockings that
662
00:29:06,832 --> 00:29:08,268
kids hang along the fireplace.
663
00:29:08,268 --> 00:29:10,313
Kind of amazing
'cause you had a hard time
664
00:29:10,313 --> 00:29:13,229
believing in genies,
but, uh, okay.
665
00:29:13,229 --> 00:29:16,058
I want a car
and a rocket launcher.
666
00:29:16,058 --> 00:29:19,061
Here is your pencil.
667
00:29:19,061 --> 00:29:22,325
Christmas is also the time kids
learn all about disappointment.
668
00:29:22,325 --> 00:29:24,284
Yeah, m... Ugh.
669
00:29:24,284 --> 00:29:26,025
- Here you go, sir.
- Oh, thank you.
670
00:29:26,025 --> 00:29:27,287
Enjoy.
671
00:29:30,116 --> 00:29:31,465
Excuse me, Bernard.
672
00:29:31,465 --> 00:29:35,077
You, sir, are an artist.
673
00:29:35,077 --> 00:29:37,819
- Thank you.
- Wow.
674
00:29:37,819 --> 00:29:40,604
- Thanks. All right.
- Wow, wow, wow.
675
00:29:40,604 --> 00:29:44,217
Okay, so tell me about this
whole Christmas thing of yours.
676
00:29:44,217 --> 00:29:48,221
Oh. Uh, well, it-it's
become really commercial,
677
00:29:48,221 --> 00:29:50,397
but... originally,
it was meant to celebrate
678
00:29:50,397 --> 00:29:53,139
the birth of this guy. He was,
he was called Jesus Christ.
679
00:29:53,139 --> 00:29:56,229
Wait, what? Jesus? Are you
talking about Mary's kid?
680
00:29:56,229 --> 00:29:57,839
Yeah.
681
00:29:57,839 --> 00:29:59,362
What? I knew him.
682
00:29:59,362 --> 00:30:01,408
What did he do to get so famous?
683
00:30:01,408 --> 00:30:03,845
You... [chuckles] Wow. Okay, uh,
684
00:30:03,845 --> 00:30:05,368
well, he turned out to be
the Son of God.
685
00:30:05,368 --> 00:30:08,415
Oh, no,
I thought he was kidding.
686
00:30:08,415 --> 00:30:10,591
Wait, what?
You-you actually met him?
687
00:30:10,591 --> 00:30:13,159
Yeah. Oh, my-- yeah, last time
I was out of the box.
688
00:30:13,159 --> 00:30:15,465
This is amazing, like...
689
00:30:15,465 --> 00:30:17,163
What? I mean,
690
00:30:17,163 --> 00:30:19,121
okay, what was,
what was he like?
691
00:30:19,121 --> 00:30:20,906
What was Jesus like?
692
00:30:20,906 --> 00:30:23,038
You know, he's Jesus.
He's just kind of like, "Hey."
693
00:30:23,038 --> 00:30:26,172
But financially under-ambitious,
694
00:30:26,172 --> 00:30:28,304
to tell you the truth.
I mean, I did say to him once,
695
00:30:28,304 --> 00:30:30,306
I'm like, "With your talents,
696
00:30:30,306 --> 00:30:32,569
"I mean water,
kaboom, into wine,
697
00:30:32,569 --> 00:30:35,311
conjuring fish out of thin air."
698
00:30:35,311 --> 00:30:37,487
I said, "Big J, we should open
a restaurant together."
699
00:30:37,487 --> 00:30:39,098
You know, we could call it,
like, "Something Fishy"
700
00:30:39,098 --> 00:30:40,664
or "Oh, My Cod."
701
00:30:40,664 --> 00:30:42,971
Goody Two-shoes didn't want
anything to do with that.
702
00:30:42,971 --> 00:30:45,495
Hey, well, I mean, to Big J.
703
00:30:45,495 --> 00:30:47,106
- To Big J.
- Hmm.
704
00:30:47,106 --> 00:30:48,977
Okay, how about this,
how about this, um...
705
00:30:48,977 --> 00:30:52,981
Oh, I wish we could go back
to Santa's Grotto.
706
00:30:52,981 --> 00:30:54,591
You got it.
707
00:30:58,552 --> 00:31:01,250
Hello. Merry Christmas.
708
00:31:01,250 --> 00:31:03,905
Okay, so, um, I wish that
709
00:31:03,905 --> 00:31:06,516
all these kids got
everything they wanted.
710
00:31:06,516 --> 00:31:08,475
Ooh, he thinks
he's gonna get a pencil.
711
00:31:08,475 --> 00:31:10,303
He is so not just gonna
get a pencil.
712
00:31:10,303 --> 00:31:13,654
♪ Oh, yeah,
candles burnin' low ♪
713
00:31:13,654 --> 00:31:17,005
- ♪ Lots of mistletoe
- There you go.
714
00:31:17,005 --> 00:31:19,965
Merry Christmas!
- ♪ Choirs singin' carols
715
00:31:19,965 --> 00:31:22,315
- ♪ Right outside my door
716
00:31:22,315 --> 00:31:25,361
♪ All these things and more...
717
00:31:25,361 --> 00:31:28,538
Whoo! Ride him! There you go.
718
00:31:28,538 --> 00:31:31,411
Her parents are
around somewhere, right?
719
00:31:32,412 --> 00:31:35,371
Uh, what is all of this?
720
00:31:35,371 --> 00:31:37,591
Uh, it's how
all these different companies
721
00:31:37,591 --> 00:31:39,680
get you to buy their thing.
722
00:31:41,334 --> 00:31:44,554
Well, how about we do
something about that, Nardo?
723
00:31:44,554 --> 00:31:45,947
Get wishing.
724
00:31:45,947 --> 00:31:48,994
♪ I see your smilin' face
725
00:31:48,994 --> 00:31:51,474
♪ Like I've never seen before
726
00:31:51,474 --> 00:31:55,261
♪ Even though I love you madly
727
00:31:55,261 --> 00:31:57,437
♪ It seems I love you more
728
00:31:57,437 --> 00:31:59,526
♪ All these things and more...
729
00:31:59,526 --> 00:32:01,441
Hey, should we change
that sign, too?
730
00:32:01,441 --> 00:32:03,399
Uh, no, that's actually,
um, a cinema.
731
00:32:03,399 --> 00:32:06,141
Wait, do you want
to see a movie? -Yes.
732
00:32:06,141 --> 00:32:07,708
I have no idea
what a movie is, but, uh,
733
00:32:07,708 --> 00:32:10,232
I would really like
to see one, I think.
734
00:32:14,628 --> 00:32:16,717
Ooh, he's fast.
735
00:32:16,717 --> 00:32:18,980
- Yeah.
- He's very, very fast.
736
00:32:21,287 --> 00:32:23,028
Don't do the jump.
Don't do the jumping!
737
00:32:23,028 --> 00:32:25,639
No, no, no.
This mission is impossible!
738
00:32:25,639 --> 00:32:28,294
- It's in the title!
739
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,777
What is the name
of that hero guy?
740
00:32:33,777 --> 00:32:36,215
- Oh, uh, Tom Cruise.
- Tom Cruise.
741
00:32:36,215 --> 00:32:38,260
- Yeah.
- I mean, he's huge.
742
00:32:38,260 --> 00:32:40,393
He's the biggest human being
I've ever seen.
743
00:32:40,393 --> 00:32:42,525
Where-where do giants
like Tom Cruise live?
744
00:32:42,525 --> 00:32:45,180
- Uh, in Los Angeles mainly.
- Los Angeles mainly.
745
00:32:45,180 --> 00:32:47,617
I mean, I'm never going there,
because I think
746
00:32:47,617 --> 00:32:49,489
he would take that enormous foot
747
00:32:49,489 --> 00:32:51,491
and just crunch me with it.
748
00:32:51,491 --> 00:32:54,059
Or, I don't know,
maybe I should go because
749
00:32:54,059 --> 00:32:57,149
what if he uses those enormous
juicy lips to kiss me?
750
00:32:57,149 --> 00:32:59,194
I really wouldn't worry
about it. I mean, Tom,
751
00:32:59,194 --> 00:33:00,674
Tom Cruise is definitely
just normal size.
752
00:33:00,674 --> 00:33:03,372
Like, in fact,
everything's normal sized.
753
00:33:03,372 --> 00:33:05,374
It's just the movies
that make them look big.
754
00:33:05,374 --> 00:33:08,290
- Ah.
755
00:33:08,290 --> 00:33:09,726
That's fine.
756
00:33:09,726 --> 00:33:12,033
Ho, ho. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hi.
757
00:33:12,033 --> 00:33:14,209
Hi. I don't think
we've been introduced.
758
00:33:14,209 --> 00:33:16,472
- I'm Lenny.
- Oh.
759
00:33:16,472 --> 00:33:18,083
- Oh, yeah, this is, um--
- Flora.
760
00:33:18,083 --> 00:33:21,086
Pleasure, really.
I mean, I-I love this.
761
00:33:21,086 --> 00:33:23,349
It's, uh...
I love a man in a uniform.
762
00:33:23,349 --> 00:33:25,307
Thank you.
763
00:33:25,307 --> 00:33:26,526
- Uh, she's my...
I-I got it.
764
00:33:26,526 --> 00:33:28,310
An old friend. You know,
765
00:33:28,310 --> 00:33:29,746
just in from out of town.
766
00:33:29,746 --> 00:33:31,792
Spending a few days just to help
767
00:33:31,792 --> 00:33:34,360
this one get out of the pickle
he got himself into with Julie.
768
00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:36,405
Good, I'm glad
someone's doing that,
769
00:33:36,405 --> 00:33:38,494
and I think it's working.
I haven't seen him glowing
770
00:33:38,494 --> 00:33:40,409
like this in a, in a bit.
771
00:33:40,409 --> 00:33:42,498
Well... -You know, I try
my best, but I don't think,
772
00:33:42,498 --> 00:33:44,457
uh, I don't-- I rarely glow.
773
00:33:44,457 --> 00:33:46,676
I think I-- I'm a little
rough, little rough. -Oh.
774
00:33:46,676 --> 00:33:49,070
I mean, I-I like things
rough around the edges.
775
00:33:50,593 --> 00:33:52,204
- Do you?
- If you know what I mean?
776
00:33:52,204 --> 00:33:53,640
- You old green eyes--
- Mm-hmm.
777
00:33:53,640 --> 00:33:55,207
- Oh, hazel.
- Hazel is right.
778
00:33:55,207 --> 00:33:56,773
And you get what I'm saying?
779
00:33:56,773 --> 00:33:58,558
Yeah, I think everyone gets
what you're saying, so...
780
00:33:58,558 --> 00:34:01,169
- What's that?
781
00:34:01,169 --> 00:34:03,171
Uh, uh, yeah.
782
00:34:03,171 --> 00:34:04,781
I think he
has to go to the bathroom.
783
00:34:04,781 --> 00:34:06,740
Uh... -LENNY: You have a key.
Don't you have a key?
784
00:34:06,740 --> 00:34:08,350
I don't need to go. -FLORA: Do
you have to go to the bathroom?
785
00:34:08,350 --> 00:34:09,743
Yeah, I do have--
Good seeing you, Lenny. Bye.
786
00:34:09,743 --> 00:34:11,527
Okay, Bernie. Flora?
Di-- Do-- Have we met?
787
00:34:11,527 --> 00:34:13,181
Like, back in the day?
Did we...?
788
00:34:13,181 --> 00:34:15,618
It would've been
way back in the day.
789
00:34:15,618 --> 00:34:18,360
- Way, way back.
- Key West. Key West?
790
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:20,101
Maybe.
791
00:34:23,931 --> 00:34:25,759
We should go.
792
00:34:25,759 --> 00:34:27,761
I'm almost ready.
793
00:34:27,761 --> 00:34:29,850
Okay.
794
00:34:32,853 --> 00:34:35,073
- Ooh. That's nice.
795
00:34:36,422 --> 00:34:38,250
Refreshing.
796
00:34:41,557 --> 00:34:43,820
Let's do this.
797
00:34:43,820 --> 00:34:45,779
How'd you want to get there?
798
00:34:45,779 --> 00:34:48,216
Do you want one
of those car things? -Yeah.
799
00:34:48,216 --> 00:34:49,478
Okay, what kind?
800
00:34:49,478 --> 00:34:51,567
Just something subtle,
801
00:34:51,567 --> 00:34:53,482
sensible.
802
00:34:58,966 --> 00:35:01,142
Do you think we've got
enough presents?
803
00:35:01,142 --> 00:35:03,275
I-I think we would have had
to have gotten
804
00:35:03,275 --> 00:35:04,798
a second car to get any more.
805
00:35:04,798 --> 00:35:06,452
Right, right?
What about this little guy?
806
00:35:06,452 --> 00:35:08,541
All right, let's see what
this thing can do.
807
00:35:08,541 --> 00:35:10,238
Okay. Okay, you ready?
808
00:35:10,238 --> 00:35:12,414
All right, let's get
Julie and Eve back!
809
00:35:12,414 --> 00:35:15,156
♪ Don't mess around
with those silly toys... ♪
810
00:35:15,156 --> 00:35:16,810
Are you sure
I'm invisible?
811
00:35:16,810 --> 00:35:19,726
Yes, I'm sure. Can-can you
stop switching sides, please?
812
00:35:21,423 --> 00:35:23,643
Oh, she's cute.
813
00:35:23,643 --> 00:35:25,688
She's definitely cute.
814
00:35:27,429 --> 00:35:29,431
How was the story today?
815
00:35:29,431 --> 00:35:30,911
- It was good.
- Good?
816
00:35:30,911 --> 00:35:32,956
Wait, Dad?
817
00:35:32,956 --> 00:35:35,785
- Hey, how are you?
- Good.
818
00:35:35,785 --> 00:35:38,527
- Hey.
- Hey.
819
00:35:38,527 --> 00:35:40,181
How are you do--? Oh.
820
00:35:40,181 --> 00:35:41,443
I'm so sorry about
the other night, you know?
821
00:35:41,443 --> 00:35:43,402
Yeah, very weird.
822
00:35:43,402 --> 00:35:44,751
What's up?
823
00:35:44,751 --> 00:35:46,796
Uh, I-I've just...
824
00:35:46,796 --> 00:35:49,973
I've been wanting you
to know that I-I-I can be there.
825
00:35:49,973 --> 00:35:52,628
You know, even when I'm not
meant to be there, so that,
826
00:35:52,628 --> 00:35:54,282
you know, when I am meant
to be there, you know,
827
00:35:54,282 --> 00:35:55,936
I'll definitely be-- be there.
828
00:35:57,764 --> 00:35:59,896
I know this can't be easy.
829
00:35:59,896 --> 00:36:02,377
It's not easy for either of us.
830
00:36:02,377 --> 00:36:04,379
Um...
831
00:36:04,379 --> 00:36:06,207
Dad, do you want
to get ice cream?
832
00:36:06,207 --> 00:36:08,905
Do I...?
833
00:36:08,905 --> 00:36:11,865
- Um...
- Yeah.
834
00:36:11,865 --> 00:36:14,476
Yeah, yeah, why not?
835
00:36:14,476 --> 00:36:16,957
I wish the place had cherry.
That's my favorite flavor.
836
00:36:16,957 --> 00:36:19,481
The-- You know what? I wis--
I wish that, too.
837
00:36:19,481 --> 00:36:22,528
- Uh, should we go? Yeah?
- Yeah. Yeah.
838
00:36:25,052 --> 00:36:26,923
Hey, you don't happen
to have cherry, do you?
839
00:36:26,923 --> 00:36:29,665
Yeah, actually, it just came in.
840
00:36:33,408 --> 00:36:35,454
Well, look, it's so good to see
the two of you.
841
00:36:35,454 --> 00:36:37,020
Oh, and don't let me forget--
before I go,
842
00:36:37,020 --> 00:36:38,761
I've got-- I-I've got
one or two things in the car
843
00:36:38,761 --> 00:36:40,763
that I'd really love
to give you.
844
00:36:40,763 --> 00:36:42,461
Hey.
845
00:36:42,461 --> 00:36:44,376
- Sorry, we're late, guys.
- Oh.
846
00:36:44,376 --> 00:36:47,248
Oh. Uh, Bernie,
uh, you remember Johnny?
847
00:36:47,248 --> 00:36:49,424
We grew up together.
This is his daughter Emma.
848
00:36:49,424 --> 00:36:51,426
Uh, they live next to my mom.
I'm sorry.
849
00:36:51,426 --> 00:36:52,688
I should've mentioned that
they were coming to meet us.
850
00:36:52,688 --> 00:36:53,863
No, no, it's good.
851
00:36:53,863 --> 00:36:55,648
- Yeah.
- Nice to finally meet ya.
852
00:36:55,648 --> 00:36:57,040
Yeah.
853
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:58,781
It's been so lucky
having them next door.
854
00:36:58,781 --> 00:37:01,349
I mean, as you can see,
the girls are two peas in a pod.
855
00:37:01,349 --> 00:37:02,350
- Great.
856
00:37:02,350 --> 00:37:03,873
Great.
857
00:37:03,873 --> 00:37:05,266
That's great.
858
00:37:07,747 --> 00:37:08,922
Who's ready to go see a movie?
859
00:37:08,922 --> 00:37:10,532
- We are! We are! We are!
860
00:37:10,532 --> 00:37:11,838
Okay, well,
we should probably go
861
00:37:11,838 --> 00:37:13,448
- if we're gonna make it.
Yeah.
862
00:37:13,448 --> 00:37:15,363
Can we do the stuff in the car
another time?
863
00:37:15,363 --> 00:37:17,278
Sure.
864
00:37:17,278 --> 00:37:19,324
Yeah, sure. Sure, that's... fab.
865
00:37:19,324 --> 00:37:21,239
Okay.
866
00:37:22,544 --> 00:37:23,806
Okay.
867
00:37:23,806 --> 00:37:25,373
- Bye, Dad.
- Yeah.
868
00:37:25,373 --> 00:37:26,766
I'll see you later, darling.
869
00:37:28,333 --> 00:37:30,291
- Have a good time, yeah?
- Yeah.
870
00:37:31,553 --> 00:37:33,338
What if I bring Eve by
on Saturday?
871
00:37:33,338 --> 00:37:34,600
For a night with you.
872
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:35,905
I mean, uh...
873
00:37:35,905 --> 00:37:37,429
- Yeah, I would love that.
- Yeah?
874
00:37:37,429 --> 00:37:38,734
Absolutely. Yeah. That's a...
875
00:37:38,734 --> 00:37:39,735
- great plan.
- All right.
876
00:37:39,735 --> 00:37:40,997
Let's do it.
877
00:37:42,042 --> 00:37:43,739
Bye, Bernie.
It was a pleasure, man. -Yeah.
878
00:37:43,739 --> 00:37:44,914
- Real pleasure.
- Yeah. Nice to...
879
00:37:44,914 --> 00:37:46,394
nice to meet you...
880
00:37:46,394 --> 00:37:47,613
Johnny.
881
00:37:48,614 --> 00:37:49,876
Uh, hold up for me, guys.
882
00:37:51,704 --> 00:37:53,619
Dad, are you okay?
[groans] Yeah!
883
00:37:53,619 --> 00:37:55,708
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. Yeah.
884
00:37:55,708 --> 00:37:57,405
- Whew, I'm good.
- Okay.
885
00:37:59,451 --> 00:38:02,062
No, I'm good. I'm good.
886
00:38:02,062 --> 00:38:04,760
Ah, it gets me every time.
887
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:06,327
I can't believe it.
888
00:38:06,327 --> 00:38:08,721
How did I end up
fifth-wheeling my own family?
889
00:38:08,721 --> 00:38:10,462
This is a disaster.
890
00:38:10,462 --> 00:38:13,073
Here's a question-- and
there's no wrong answer-- but...
891
00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:16,772
would you maybe feel better
if you would wish,
892
00:38:16,772 --> 00:38:18,774
you know, for Johnny to kinda...
893
00:38:18,774 --> 00:38:20,472
So easy to do it.
894
00:38:20,472 --> 00:38:23,692
It's actually easier to do it
than not to do it.
895
00:38:23,692 --> 00:38:26,826
♪ Without that girl of mine,
oh! ♪
896
00:38:26,826 --> 00:38:30,569
♪ Christmas
just ain't Christmas ♪
897
00:38:30,569 --> 00:38:32,658
♪ Without the one you love
898
00:38:32,658 --> 00:38:33,659
Hello, gorgeous.
899
00:38:33,659 --> 00:38:35,356
Hello, handsome.
900
00:38:35,356 --> 00:38:36,401
Do you think you and I could...
901
00:38:36,401 --> 00:38:37,489
Yep.
902
00:38:37,489 --> 00:38:39,142
Yeah?
903
00:38:39,142 --> 00:38:40,492
Hi, Bernie.
904
00:38:45,845 --> 00:38:47,629
So, Lenny's interesting.
905
00:38:47,629 --> 00:38:50,632
I mean, that's a face
that has seen some fun, right?
906
00:38:50,632 --> 00:38:52,591
Yeah. Well,
he's definitely single,
907
00:38:52,591 --> 00:38:54,636
I can tell you that much.
908
00:38:54,636 --> 00:38:56,769
I hope you like cats, 'cause
he's got a fair few of them.
909
00:38:56,769 --> 00:38:58,727
Oh, I love cats.
They're delicious.
910
00:39:00,512 --> 00:39:04,037
This Julie and Eve
thing's not gonna be easy.
911
00:39:05,038 --> 00:39:07,475
Stop right there, buster.
912
00:39:07,475 --> 00:39:11,653
Okay, Rome was not,
as you know, built in a day.
913
00:39:11,653 --> 00:39:12,828
It took 12.
914
00:39:12,828 --> 00:39:15,614
We have all night
915
00:39:15,614 --> 00:39:17,964
to just sit
and come up with a plan,
916
00:39:17,964 --> 00:39:19,487
what's our next move.
917
00:39:19,487 --> 00:39:20,967
We've got this.
918
00:39:22,838 --> 00:39:24,100
Are you expecting someone?
919
00:39:24,100 --> 00:39:26,015
No, no.
920
00:39:27,452 --> 00:39:28,931
- Hey! My boy!
921
00:39:30,672 --> 00:39:31,847
Hi!
922
00:39:31,847 --> 00:39:32,979
- Everyone. -
- Hey, Julie!
923
00:39:34,502 --> 00:39:36,504
Ooh, is that my baby, Eve?
924
00:39:36,504 --> 00:39:37,897
Come give Grandma kisses!
925
00:39:37,897 --> 00:39:40,682
I-I wish y-you could meet...
the caterer
926
00:39:40,682 --> 00:39:42,031
- I got in for the evening.
- Oh.
927
00:39:42,031 --> 00:39:44,425
And you can. Hi, I'm Flora.
928
00:39:44,425 --> 00:39:45,644
- Hi.
- No, please don't.
929
00:39:45,644 --> 00:39:47,428
- Hi. -Yeah.
- Oh. Sorry.
930
00:39:47,428 --> 00:39:49,038
- Come in. Do come in.
- What?
931
00:39:49,038 --> 00:39:50,953
- Good to see you. -Okay.
932
00:39:50,953 --> 00:39:51,954
Hi, Mum.
933
00:39:51,954 --> 00:39:53,652
The caterer?
934
00:39:53,652 --> 00:39:55,654
- You have a caterer?
- Well, I just thought I'd...
935
00:39:55,654 --> 00:39:58,134
- Starving, so this works out.
- Hey.
936
00:40:00,006 --> 00:40:02,965
How did you forget that your
entire family was coming over?
937
00:40:02,965 --> 00:40:04,880
Yeah, I mean, there's-there's
been a lot of distractions
938
00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:06,795
- in the last couple days.
- That's fair.
939
00:40:06,795 --> 00:40:08,449
Okay, what do you need me to do?
940
00:40:08,449 --> 00:40:10,582
Uh, okay, I wish
there was a complete meal
941
00:40:10,582 --> 00:40:13,541
with all the trimmings
right here in this kitchen.
942
00:40:16,588 --> 00:40:18,111
- That's pretty good!
- Yeah? Okay.
943
00:40:18,111 --> 00:40:19,504
This is gonna be so fun.
944
00:40:19,504 --> 00:40:21,636
I bet your family's great.
945
00:40:21,636 --> 00:40:24,204
And then Paul looks directly
at me and says,
946
00:40:24,204 --> 00:40:26,598
"David,
I actually am an accountant."
947
00:40:28,034 --> 00:40:29,470
Imagine, we had quite a laugh
about that.
948
00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:32,081
Why?
949
00:40:33,909 --> 00:40:35,998
I'm still a little confused.
950
00:40:35,998 --> 00:40:38,479
Where are Eve and Julie?
951
00:40:38,479 --> 00:40:40,612
Great question.
- Yeah. [chuckles] Right. Um...
952
00:40:40,612 --> 00:40:42,744
We're-we're actually on a...
953
00:40:42,744 --> 00:40:44,485
bit of a break at the moment.
954
00:40:44,485 --> 00:40:46,269
-A break. What-what
does that mean, a break?
955
00:40:46,269 --> 00:40:48,054
- Well, l-let me explain.
Bernie,
956
00:40:48,054 --> 00:40:50,186
you've got to work
on a marriage. -I know.
957
00:40:50,186 --> 00:40:51,579
Yeah, you can say that again.
958
00:40:51,579 --> 00:40:52,972
Excuse me.
959
00:40:52,972 --> 00:40:54,713
See? See, this is why
I never took the plunge.
960
00:40:54,713 --> 00:40:56,889
You know? Some stallions,
they just need to roam free.
961
00:40:56,889 --> 00:40:59,674
Bernard, hey, look, man,
if you ever want to talk,
962
00:40:59,674 --> 00:41:00,936
mano y mano,
963
00:41:00,936 --> 00:41:02,590
I'm here for you, bud.
964
00:41:02,590 --> 00:41:04,070
Yeah, you're not using
that correctly.
965
00:41:04,070 --> 00:41:05,550
Actually, I'm pretty sure I am.
966
00:41:05,550 --> 00:41:07,073
'Cause it's man friend
to man friend.
967
00:41:07,073 --> 00:41:08,553
Who's ready for dead bird?
968
00:41:08,553 --> 00:41:10,163
Huh?
969
00:41:11,556 --> 00:41:12,818
That is a strange bunch.
970
00:41:12,818 --> 00:41:14,602
I mean, you're telling me?
971
00:41:16,082 --> 00:41:17,605
I-I j-- I just wish
I could find a way
972
00:41:17,605 --> 00:41:18,780
to make them happy, you know?
973
00:41:19,999 --> 00:41:21,217
Wait a minute.
974
00:41:22,218 --> 00:41:24,960
Okay. I have a fantastic plan.
975
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:26,788
Risky...
976
00:41:26,788 --> 00:41:28,964
but I think fantastic.
977
00:41:28,964 --> 00:41:30,618
All right, guys,
just l-listen up.
978
00:41:30,618 --> 00:41:32,054
I've-I've got something
I'd-I'd love to tell you.
979
00:41:32,054 --> 00:41:33,055
It's about me and Flora.
980
00:41:33,055 --> 00:41:34,187
Mm. See? Told you.
981
00:41:34,187 --> 00:41:35,188
He's already got
a new girlfriend.
982
00:41:35,188 --> 00:41:36,276
No, it's-- it is--
983
00:41:36,276 --> 00:41:37,190
it's nothing to do with that.
984
00:41:37,190 --> 00:41:38,539
It's-it's-it's...
985
00:41:38,539 --> 00:41:40,541
Uh, um...
986
00:41:40,541 --> 00:41:41,542
How do I say this?
987
00:41:41,542 --> 00:41:42,630
Um, Flora, she's a genie.
988
00:41:42,630 --> 00:41:44,893
- A what?
989
00:41:44,893 --> 00:41:46,634
Don't laugh.
- -What?
990
00:41:46,634 --> 00:41:47,809
What? What? -BERNARD:
She can make wishes come true.
991
00:41:47,809 --> 00:41:49,332
- Yeah.
- As you all know,
992
00:41:49,332 --> 00:41:51,117
it's only three wishes.
Absolutely only three,
993
00:41:51,117 --> 00:41:53,075
- but, yeah, that's, uh...
- Yeah. Three.
994
00:41:53,075 --> 00:41:54,555
- Yeah.
- That's my Christmas gift to...
995
00:41:54,555 --> 00:41:56,078
each one of you. Three wishes.
996
00:41:56,078 --> 00:41:57,993
Pretty good gift, right?
997
00:41:57,993 --> 00:41:59,734
Okay,
998
00:41:59,734 --> 00:42:01,562
okay, he's lost his mind.
Julie's left him... -What?
999
00:42:01,562 --> 00:42:03,303
...and he's lost his mind.
I mean,
1000
00:42:03,303 --> 00:42:04,870
you all thought I was the one
who was gonna go off the rails.
1001
00:42:04,870 --> 00:42:07,046
But, no, perfect Bernard...
1002
00:42:07,046 --> 00:42:08,917
Don't do that. Okay, it's true.
1003
00:42:08,917 --> 00:42:10,832
For example,
Mar-Marvin, you just...
1004
00:42:10,832 --> 00:42:12,660
you just had to wear
that Harvard sweatshirt,
1005
00:42:12,660 --> 00:42:14,836
again, even though
we all know Diana hates it.
1006
00:42:14,836 --> 00:42:17,143
Because he didn't go
to Harvard. -
1007
00:42:17,143 --> 00:42:19,014
- Why wear it? -
I wish
1008
00:42:19,014 --> 00:42:22,061
Marvin was wearing something
Diana actually liked.
1009
00:42:25,325 --> 00:42:27,936
And I wish Dad could be
more like the man
1010
00:42:27,936 --> 00:42:28,937
Mum fell in love with.
1011
00:42:31,070 --> 00:42:32,680
Oh.
- Whoa.
1012
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:34,029
Oh, my God.
And...
1013
00:42:34,029 --> 00:42:35,727
I wish Pete would stop referring
to himself
1014
00:42:35,727 --> 00:42:37,816
as a "lone wolf" and just
sign up for all the dating apps.
1015
00:42:43,648 --> 00:42:44,866
There you go.
1016
00:42:44,866 --> 00:42:45,998
There's my three.
1017
00:42:45,998 --> 00:42:47,216
Proof is in the genie pudding.
1018
00:42:47,216 --> 00:42:48,609
Am I right?
1019
00:42:48,609 --> 00:42:51,133
I wish
I had my old husband back.
1020
00:42:53,048 --> 00:42:54,397
Oh, God.
1021
00:42:54,397 --> 00:42:56,878
I actually have
three big ones planned.
1022
00:42:56,878 --> 00:42:59,315
First, I wish
for my own whole set
1023
00:42:59,315 --> 00:43:02,362
of Honma titanium golf clubs.
1024
00:43:02,362 --> 00:43:04,233
- Oh!
1025
00:43:04,233 --> 00:43:06,279
You don't--
you don't even really like golf.
1026
00:43:06,279 --> 00:43:08,281
You just like wearing
your weird wicking fabric shirts
1027
00:43:08,281 --> 00:43:09,848
and drinking in the clubhouse.
1028
00:43:09,848 --> 00:43:11,980
Baby, I wish
you would stop talking
1029
00:43:11,980 --> 00:43:13,939
and just let me get on
with this.
1030
00:43:13,939 --> 00:43:16,071
Uh, uh...
1031
00:43:18,857 --> 00:43:21,163
Does that mean Diana's never
gonna be able to talk again?
1032
00:43:21,163 --> 00:43:22,687
Unless Marvin
was to wish for her
1033
00:43:22,687 --> 00:43:24,166
not to be able
to not talk anymore.
1034
00:43:24,166 --> 00:43:25,733
Oh, come on.
1035
00:43:25,733 --> 00:43:27,082
Dude!
1036
00:43:27,082 --> 00:43:28,388
Uh...
1037
00:43:28,388 --> 00:43:30,042
Okay.
1038
00:43:30,042 --> 00:43:32,261
Yeah, whatever.
I, like, wish that...
1039
00:43:32,261 --> 00:43:33,915
Diana could talk again.
1040
00:43:35,090 --> 00:43:36,701
- Huh.
1041
00:43:36,701 --> 00:43:39,660
Well, thanks, babe.
1042
00:43:39,660 --> 00:43:41,793
Marvin, I wish
you would just go to hell.
1043
00:43:42,837 --> 00:43:44,447
- Oh...
1044
00:43:44,447 --> 00:43:46,275
Okay, please stop!
1045
00:43:46,275 --> 00:43:49,670
Is anybody gonna wish
Marvin back from hell?
1046
00:43:50,497 --> 00:43:52,020
Damn it.
1047
00:43:52,020 --> 00:43:53,152
Fine.
1048
00:43:53,152 --> 00:43:54,762
I guess...
1049
00:43:54,762 --> 00:43:57,025
I guess I wish
he'd come back from hell.
1050
00:43:59,201 --> 00:44:00,768
Oh, my God!
1051
00:44:00,768 --> 00:44:02,378
What was it like?
1052
00:44:02,378 --> 00:44:04,380
Uh, I think it's pretty obvious.
1053
00:44:04,380 --> 00:44:06,034
Very hot down there.
1054
00:44:06,034 --> 00:44:07,775
Mm. -And how does
the devil look like?
1055
00:44:07,775 --> 00:44:09,385
W-Well, he kind of looked like
Ricky Gervais.
1056
00:44:09,385 --> 00:44:10,691
All right, stop.
1057
00:44:10,691 --> 00:44:12,954
You're a family.
You're my family.
1058
00:44:12,954 --> 00:44:16,175
This is our one real chance
for happiness.
1059
00:44:16,175 --> 00:44:17,176
Please,
1060
00:44:17,176 --> 00:44:19,221
just... focus.
1061
00:44:19,221 --> 00:44:20,745
- Yeah.
Actually,
1062
00:44:20,745 --> 00:44:22,094
Bernard,
1063
00:44:22,094 --> 00:44:24,052
I just wish
this whole thing was over.
1064
00:44:25,314 --> 00:44:26,707
Done.
1065
00:44:30,145 --> 00:44:31,407
Oh.
1066
00:44:31,407 --> 00:44:33,801
Oh, wowzers.
1067
00:44:34,889 --> 00:44:36,325
I mean, in all my years,
1068
00:44:36,325 --> 00:44:39,764
I have never seen
anyone use the wishes worse.
1069
00:44:39,764 --> 00:44:41,113
Yeah.
1070
00:44:44,725 --> 00:44:47,162
I mean,
we've got to be so careful.
1071
00:44:47,162 --> 00:44:49,164
All my family could
literally have gone to hell.
1072
00:44:49,164 --> 00:44:50,426
One of 'em did.
1073
00:44:50,426 --> 00:44:51,689
Yeah.
1074
00:44:52,515 --> 00:44:55,475
Okay. It's WWTCD time.
1075
00:44:55,475 --> 00:44:56,519
What's that?
1076
00:44:56,519 --> 00:44:58,913
"What would Tom Cruise do?"
1077
00:44:58,913 --> 00:45:01,002
- Because Operation
1078
00:45:01,002 --> 00:45:04,876
Bring Julie and Eve Back Home
is not Mission: Impossible.
1079
00:45:04,876 --> 00:45:05,877
What is it?
1080
00:45:05,877 --> 00:45:07,313
What?
1081
00:45:07,313 --> 00:45:08,923
It's Wishing: Impossible.
1082
00:45:10,359 --> 00:45:12,840
You know, I think
we should start with, like,
1083
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:15,147
kind of sprucing up the place
for Julie.
1084
00:45:15,147 --> 00:45:16,931
You know?
Which means probably getting...
1085
00:45:16,931 --> 00:45:20,500
rid of quite a few of
these old, dusty Nardo trinkets.
1086
00:45:20,500 --> 00:45:22,894
This is our first fix.
1087
00:45:25,418 --> 00:45:26,854
You know what? You're right.
1088
00:45:26,854 --> 00:45:28,160
She actually always hated
this thing.
1089
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:29,857
- Yeah.
- Yeah. I can't imagine why.
1090
00:45:29,857 --> 00:45:31,293
Is it your shirt?
1091
00:45:31,293 --> 00:45:32,991
Uh, no, it's not mine.
1092
00:45:32,991 --> 00:45:35,036
It's actually--
He was a famous footballer.
1093
00:45:35,036 --> 00:45:37,386
Do you have his underpants
or trousers?
1094
00:45:37,386 --> 00:45:39,040
- It's not a crazy question.
1095
00:45:39,040 --> 00:45:40,302
Yeah, no,
I don't have his pants.
1096
00:45:40,302 --> 00:45:42,217
So does anybody else have
your shirt
1097
00:45:42,217 --> 00:45:46,004
or maybe, maybe your underpants
under glass in their house?
1098
00:45:46,004 --> 00:45:47,135
Well, not yet, but...
1099
00:45:47,135 --> 00:45:48,876
Okay. All right.
1100
00:45:48,876 --> 00:45:50,182
Think we should swap it
for something
1101
00:45:50,182 --> 00:45:52,358
maybe, maybe
that Julie would enjoy.
1102
00:45:52,358 --> 00:45:53,402
What?
1103
00:45:53,402 --> 00:45:55,491
Let's swap it for something
1104
00:45:55,491 --> 00:45:57,929
- deeply respectful. You know?
- Oh, okay. All right.
1105
00:45:57,929 --> 00:46:00,453
Um...
Go on. Make it the Mona Lisa.
1106
00:46:03,456 --> 00:46:06,154
I mean,
she could have smiled, right?
1107
00:46:06,154 --> 00:46:08,853
N-No, no, no. That's really--
that's very much the point.
1108
00:46:08,853 --> 00:46:09,854
Ah.
1109
00:46:09,854 --> 00:46:11,203
Okay. Well, I don't know.
1110
00:46:11,203 --> 00:46:12,944
I think
we're off to a good start.
1111
00:46:14,075 --> 00:46:15,207
All right.
1112
00:46:15,207 --> 00:46:18,906
That's what I'm talking about.
1113
00:46:18,906 --> 00:46:20,125
- Well done!
- Oh, thank you.
1114
00:46:20,125 --> 00:46:21,561
I mean, look at this, right?
1115
00:46:21,561 --> 00:46:23,345
I think Julie's gonna love it.
1116
00:46:23,345 --> 00:46:26,087
But you see? Everything's
gonna be perfect again.
1117
00:46:26,087 --> 00:46:29,917
And you're gonna be back
with Julie and Eve, and I'm...
1118
00:46:29,917 --> 00:46:32,398
you know, I'm-I'm g--
I'm gonna be...
1119
00:46:32,398 --> 00:46:33,921
- What?
1120
00:46:33,921 --> 00:46:35,618
Uh, nothing. You know?
1121
00:46:35,618 --> 00:46:37,011
I'll-I'll be around.
1122
00:46:37,011 --> 00:46:38,883
You know? Doing my thang.
1123
00:46:38,883 --> 00:46:42,103
-Which, of course,
is doing your thang...
1124
00:46:42,103 --> 00:46:43,409
for you.
1125
00:46:44,976 --> 00:46:46,499
Which is great.
1126
00:46:47,674 --> 00:46:50,895
Okay, put a-- put a fork in me,
I'm done.
1127
00:46:50,895 --> 00:46:52,592
Uh, that's-- I don't want you
to put a fork in me.
1128
00:46:52,592 --> 00:46:54,028
- I'm just tired.
- Okay.
1129
00:46:54,028 --> 00:46:56,552
Okay. All right, good night.
1130
00:46:56,552 --> 00:46:58,859
- Night. Night, Flora.
- Uh-huh.
1131
00:48:15,980 --> 00:48:17,329
Mon Dieu.
1132
00:48:17,329 --> 00:48:19,200
- Mon Dieu.
1133
00:48:31,604 --> 00:48:32,648
Hey, Dad.
1134
00:48:32,648 --> 00:48:35,738
Hey, child.
1135
00:48:35,738 --> 00:48:38,219
Child's mother.
Exactly on time.
1136
00:48:38,219 --> 00:48:41,657
Punctuality. Very important
for relationships.
1137
00:48:41,657 --> 00:48:43,572
Right. I know that, now.
1138
00:48:44,617 --> 00:48:45,705
I'll see you tomorrow, baby.
1139
00:48:47,054 --> 00:48:48,055
Have fun.
1140
00:48:48,055 --> 00:48:49,970
Um, you'll bring her back?
1141
00:48:49,970 --> 00:48:51,363
Yeah, of course.
I'll see you then.
1142
00:48:51,363 --> 00:48:54,018
- All right. Bye.
- Bye.
1143
00:48:57,064 --> 00:48:59,371
I've got someone
I want you to meet.
1144
00:49:01,112 --> 00:49:02,548
Hi, Eve.
1145
00:49:02,548 --> 00:49:04,332
So, this is, um, Miss Flora.
1146
00:49:04,332 --> 00:49:06,247
She's gonna be
staying with us for a bit.
1147
00:49:06,247 --> 00:49:08,641
And if you need anything,
just-just let me know,
1148
00:49:08,641 --> 00:49:11,731
because, you know,
your wish is my command.
1149
00:49:11,731 --> 00:49:13,254
Indirectly.
1150
00:49:13,254 --> 00:49:15,126
- Okay. Young lady?
- Yep.
1151
00:49:15,126 --> 00:49:16,997
I think I might have
a couple of things
1152
00:49:16,997 --> 00:49:18,259
that might meet
with your approval.
1153
00:49:19,521 --> 00:49:20,696
Why don't you have a look
in your bedroom?
1154
00:49:20,696 --> 00:49:22,220
Is it a dollhouse?
1155
00:49:22,220 --> 00:49:24,091
It's definitely a dollhouse!
1156
00:49:26,093 --> 00:49:27,573
Why?
1157
00:49:27,573 --> 00:49:29,792
- Why are you--
- I'm sorry. I got very excited.
1158
00:49:31,533 --> 00:49:33,057
- Yeah?
1159
00:49:33,057 --> 00:49:35,189
Yes!
Yes, you like it?
1160
00:49:35,189 --> 00:49:38,018
- I love it!
- Go on. Go on and look.
1161
00:49:38,018 --> 00:49:40,064
Look at that.
It's good.
1162
00:49:40,064 --> 00:49:42,327
Let's go to the bath.
1163
00:49:42,327 --> 00:49:43,763
Okay.
1164
00:49:43,763 --> 00:49:48,028
The trick is to be
as precise as possible.
1165
00:49:48,028 --> 00:49:49,421
- You see?
- Wow.
1166
00:49:49,421 --> 00:49:51,379
♪ Merry Christmas, baby...
1167
00:49:51,379 --> 00:49:54,295
The dollhouse is awesome.
Thanks, Dad.
1168
00:49:55,296 --> 00:49:56,645
Are you happy?
1169
00:49:56,645 --> 00:49:58,604
Yeah.
1170
00:50:01,128 --> 00:50:03,304
Oh, uh, Eve, Eve.
1171
00:50:03,304 --> 00:50:06,046
I'd love to see it if you want
to show me around a bit more?
1172
00:50:06,046 --> 00:50:07,482
I'd love that.
1173
00:50:07,482 --> 00:50:09,484
Let's do it. Okay?
1174
00:50:09,484 --> 00:50:10,790
All right.
You've got this, right?
1175
00:50:10,790 --> 00:50:13,445
Yeah. I got it.
Precision?
1176
00:50:13,445 --> 00:50:16,230
♪ You surely treat me nice
1177
00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:23,237
- Oh.
1178
00:50:23,237 --> 00:50:27,198
♪ Love you, baby,
the rest of my life ♪
1179
00:50:29,591 --> 00:50:31,680
♪ Merry Christmas, baby...
1180
00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:33,073
So, a running race?
1181
00:50:33,073 --> 00:50:34,509
Yep.
1182
00:50:34,509 --> 00:50:38,078
- Like an actual running race?
- Yes, you run.
1183
00:50:38,078 --> 00:50:39,514
It's just, I'm so obviously
gonna beat you.
1184
00:50:39,514 --> 00:50:41,255
I'm a fully grown man
with long legs
1185
00:50:41,255 --> 00:50:43,344
and you're a small girl
in old-fashioned shoes.
1186
00:50:43,344 --> 00:50:44,650
Yeah.
1187
00:50:44,650 --> 00:50:46,652
- Race you to the big tree!
- Hey!
1188
00:50:46,652 --> 00:50:48,871
Hey, that's cheating!
1189
00:50:48,871 --> 00:50:51,352
Being clever is not cheating!
1190
00:50:52,353 --> 00:50:53,528
Uh...
1191
00:50:53,528 --> 00:50:56,749
do you use it for something?
1192
00:50:56,749 --> 00:50:58,403
Yes.
1193
00:50:58,403 --> 00:51:00,318
Does it breathe?
1194
00:51:05,584 --> 00:51:07,586
I'm reading this book about,
1195
00:51:07,586 --> 00:51:11,285
about parallel universes
and time travel
1196
00:51:11,285 --> 00:51:13,200
- and dimensional portals.
- Yes.
1197
00:51:13,200 --> 00:51:14,549
- Right? You know about th--
- Yeah.
1198
00:51:14,549 --> 00:51:15,681
- Have you heard about it?
- I-- Well, yes.
1199
00:51:15,681 --> 00:51:17,596
Uh, there's a high likelihood
1200
00:51:17,596 --> 00:51:21,339
that there's another version
of me that might be a,
1201
00:51:21,339 --> 00:51:23,341
like an equestrian trainer or,
or a chef.
1202
00:51:23,341 --> 00:51:25,343
Hmm, I would say it's--
1203
00:51:25,343 --> 00:51:27,432
You're definitely
somewhere else on a horse.
1204
00:51:27,432 --> 00:51:29,260
- Hmm? Okay.
1205
00:51:31,131 --> 00:51:32,132
Ah.
1206
00:51:32,132 --> 00:51:34,134
Here comes trouble.
1207
00:51:34,134 --> 00:51:36,441
Hey, Flora. Hey, Lenny.
1208
00:51:36,441 --> 00:51:38,138
Hey, nice to have you back, kiddo.
1209
00:51:38,138 --> 00:51:39,661
Your dad's kind of boring
on his own.
1210
00:51:39,661 --> 00:51:41,359
No way.
1211
00:51:41,359 --> 00:51:43,404
He used to be a selfish bastard,
but now he's great.
1212
00:51:43,404 --> 00:51:46,538
- Oh...
- Oh. Wow.
1213
00:51:46,538 --> 00:51:48,409
- Bye, Lenny.
- Bye.
1214
00:52:08,690 --> 00:52:10,170
- Here she is, in one piece.
1215
00:52:10,170 --> 00:52:11,824
- Hi, Grandma.
- Hey, sweetheart.
1216
00:52:11,824 --> 00:52:13,608
- Hey.
1217
00:52:13,608 --> 00:52:14,957
Did you have a good time?
1218
00:52:14,957 --> 00:52:17,873
- Really great.
- Oh, good.
1219
00:52:17,873 --> 00:52:20,398
Thanks, Bernie.
That's wonderful.
1220
00:52:34,325 --> 00:52:35,804
Hello?
1221
00:52:35,804 --> 00:52:38,764
- It's Julie.
- What?
1222
00:52:40,679 --> 00:52:42,376
- Let me hear.
- No, no, no, no.
1223
00:52:42,376 --> 00:52:44,770
No, that, that,
that would be great. Um...
1224
00:52:44,770 --> 00:52:47,773
Oh, Friday night here, 7:00?
1225
00:52:47,773 --> 00:52:49,514
No, that's-that's,
um, that's perfect.
1226
00:52:49,514 --> 00:52:51,777
Just the three of us?
1227
00:52:51,777 --> 00:52:54,910
Yeah, that's,
that's, that's great.
1228
00:52:54,910 --> 00:52:57,304
Okay, um, yeah,
I'll see you then.
1229
00:52:57,304 --> 00:52:59,437
Okay, bye.
1230
00:52:59,437 --> 00:53:00,916
What just happened?
1231
00:53:00,916 --> 00:53:03,745
Yeah, she, uh, she wants
to come over Friday night.
1232
00:53:03,745 --> 00:53:05,399
You are back in business.
1233
00:53:05,399 --> 00:53:06,879
Right?
You are back in what?
1234
00:53:06,879 --> 00:53:08,620
- Business.
- That's right.
1235
00:53:08,620 --> 00:53:10,796
Okay. Do me a favor.
1236
00:53:10,796 --> 00:53:11,971
Let me handle dinner,
1237
00:53:11,971 --> 00:53:14,452
'cause romance is
kind of my thing.
1238
00:53:14,452 --> 00:53:16,497
- Romance is your thing?
- Yeah.
1239
00:53:16,497 --> 00:53:17,977
Okay, well,
I-I wish you would do that.
1240
00:53:17,977 --> 00:53:20,327
- Okay.
- Thank you, my friend.
1241
00:53:20,327 --> 00:53:21,981
Okay, this is it.
1242
00:53:21,981 --> 00:53:23,417
We are gonna do this, all right?
1243
00:53:23,417 --> 00:53:25,463
We are in it, and Julie's about
1244
00:53:25,463 --> 00:53:28,988
to find herself on the road
to Ro-Nardomance.
1245
00:53:30,729 --> 00:53:33,862
Nardomance. Buh-buh.
1246
00:53:33,862 --> 00:53:36,474
♪ Just kiss me once
and kiss me twice ♪
1247
00:53:36,474 --> 00:53:38,867
♪ Then kiss me once again
1248
00:53:38,867 --> 00:53:42,523
♪ It's been a long, long time
1249
00:53:43,959 --> 00:53:45,352
♪ Haven't felt like this...
1250
00:53:45,352 --> 00:53:46,658
Hi, Dad!
1251
00:53:46,658 --> 00:53:48,964
- Come on. Come in.
- Go.
1252
00:53:48,964 --> 00:53:51,924
All she's been talking about
is that dollhouse.
1253
00:53:51,924 --> 00:53:53,012
Yeah, I bet.
1254
00:53:53,012 --> 00:53:55,536
Wow.
1255
00:53:55,536 --> 00:53:57,451
You weren't kidding...
1256
00:53:57,451 --> 00:53:59,453
when you said
you spruced up the place.
1257
00:53:59,453 --> 00:54:03,414
Yeah, well, I know you always
wanted a bit of a refresh.
1258
00:54:03,414 --> 00:54:06,417
- So...
- Oh, my God.
1259
00:54:06,417 --> 00:54:09,594
- Oh, so this is the dollhouse.
Do you like it?
1260
00:54:09,594 --> 00:54:10,899
Okay, well...
1261
00:54:12,379 --> 00:54:14,251
It's amazing.
1262
00:54:15,339 --> 00:54:16,862
Okay.
Wow.
1263
00:54:16,862 --> 00:54:18,907
That was really delicious.
1264
00:54:18,907 --> 00:54:20,561
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
1265
00:54:20,561 --> 00:54:22,563
All right, well, here you go.
1266
00:54:22,563 --> 00:54:24,391
Oh. Okay.
1267
00:54:24,391 --> 00:54:25,914
Why not?
1268
00:54:25,914 --> 00:54:27,916
When did you learn
how to make martinis?
1269
00:54:27,916 --> 00:54:30,049
- Ah, cheers to you.
- Cheers.
1270
00:54:32,443 --> 00:54:33,792
Oh, my God.
1271
00:54:33,792 --> 00:54:36,316
Look at that.
1272
00:54:36,316 --> 00:54:37,491
Fireworks.
1273
00:54:37,491 --> 00:54:39,841
How lucky are we?
1274
00:54:47,762 --> 00:54:49,634
Wow.
1275
00:54:49,634 --> 00:54:51,549
Look at that.
1276
00:54:51,549 --> 00:54:55,466
That is actually pretty magical.
1277
00:54:55,466 --> 00:54:56,989
Yeah.
1278
00:54:56,989 --> 00:54:58,773
♪ Without you
1279
00:54:58,773 --> 00:55:02,995
♪ So kiss me once,
then kiss me twice ♪
1280
00:55:02,995 --> 00:55:05,345
♪ Then kiss me once again
1281
00:55:05,345 --> 00:55:07,521
♪ It's been a long time,
oh, yeah. ♪
1282
00:55:07,521 --> 00:55:09,306
Hey, I, um...
1283
00:55:10,568 --> 00:55:14,093
I-- Can we actually
just talk about something?
1284
00:55:14,093 --> 00:55:16,748
Uh, yeah.
1285
00:55:17,749 --> 00:55:19,359
Look, Bernie, I...
1286
00:55:19,359 --> 00:55:21,883
I know that this has been a...
1287
00:55:21,883 --> 00:55:25,452
really tough time
and I just, um...
1288
00:55:25,452 --> 00:55:28,586
And I know that it's only been
a couple weeks,
1289
00:55:28,586 --> 00:55:31,719
but I-I think it might be
worth thinking
1290
00:55:31,719 --> 00:55:36,681
about how this all
might work long-term.
1291
00:55:37,986 --> 00:55:39,379
Long-term?
1292
00:55:39,379 --> 00:55:40,859
Look, I don't mean forever.
1293
00:55:40,859 --> 00:55:42,426
Look, I don't,
1294
00:55:42,426 --> 00:55:43,601
I don't know
what's gonna happen,
1295
00:55:43,601 --> 00:55:45,472
I just--
1296
00:55:45,472 --> 00:55:48,388
Like, longer-term.
Like now.
1297
00:55:48,388 --> 00:55:50,129
You know, f-for instance,
1298
00:55:50,129 --> 00:55:53,001
I was thinking that maybe
you could take Eve
1299
00:55:53,001 --> 00:55:55,526
on the 23rd and the 24th?
1300
00:55:56,831 --> 00:56:00,661
Uh, uh, you mean,
a-actual Christmas Eve.
1301
00:56:00,661 --> 00:56:01,923
Yeah.
1302
00:56:01,923 --> 00:56:05,971
Yeah, it... seems
as though magically, um,
1303
00:56:05,971 --> 00:56:09,801
us taking time apart
has been the making of you two.
1304
00:56:09,801 --> 00:56:12,673
I mean, that's good news.
1305
00:56:12,673 --> 00:56:15,589
Though, sort of cloaked in bad.
1306
00:56:16,634 --> 00:56:19,027
Bernard, you're a good man.
1307
00:56:21,203 --> 00:56:22,509
Thank you for dinner.
1308
00:56:30,604 --> 00:56:31,997
Bye, Dad.
1309
00:56:33,085 --> 00:56:34,739
See you tomorrow, darling.
1310
00:56:40,919 --> 00:56:42,442
Sorry.
1311
00:56:42,442 --> 00:56:46,011
- I'm sorry, that was tough.
- Yeah, I know.
1312
00:56:46,011 --> 00:56:49,101
But the Eve news,
that's great, so...
1313
00:56:49,101 --> 00:56:50,624
You know, I really thought
1314
00:56:50,624 --> 00:56:52,104
the fireworks
were gonna work better.
1315
00:56:52,104 --> 00:56:54,889
Yeah, the fireworks
were pretty epic actually.
1316
00:56:54,889 --> 00:56:56,978
I mean, I-I thought
you had some other stuff?
1317
00:56:56,978 --> 00:57:00,025
Yeah, I did, but then Julie
kind of left
1318
00:57:00,025 --> 00:57:02,027
before I hit my stride.
1319
00:57:03,028 --> 00:57:04,856
Ta-da!
1320
00:57:04,856 --> 00:57:07,554
I mean, not too shabby, right?
1321
00:57:08,599 --> 00:57:09,730
Is that a bear?
1322
00:57:09,730 --> 00:57:11,906
It used to be.
1323
00:57:11,906 --> 00:57:14,082
And a fire?
We don't have a chimney.
1324
00:57:14,082 --> 00:57:15,475
I'm a genie.
1325
00:57:15,475 --> 00:57:16,520
Right.
1326
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:17,608
Ooh, I should let the band go.
1327
00:57:17,608 --> 00:57:19,087
The band?
1328
00:57:19,087 --> 00:57:20,959
- Hey, guys, I--
Okay, here we go.
1329
00:57:20,959 --> 00:57:23,004
One, two, three, four.
1330
00:57:35,756 --> 00:57:37,758
What?
1331
00:57:37,758 --> 00:57:39,760
- What?
- It's Julie.
1332
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:40,761
No.
1333
00:57:40,761 --> 00:57:42,676
It's Julie.
1334
00:57:42,676 --> 00:57:44,112
She went all the way downstairs
1335
00:57:44,112 --> 00:57:46,027
and she started thinking
about your Nardoness,
1336
00:57:46,027 --> 00:57:49,814
then she came all the way back
upstairs for-for this.
1337
00:57:49,814 --> 00:57:51,076
- Let's just...
- Do you think? Look--
1338
00:57:51,076 --> 00:57:52,512
- Ow! Don't do that.
- Yeah. Okay.
1339
00:57:52,512 --> 00:57:54,035
It's just good energy for ya.
1340
00:57:54,035 --> 00:57:55,036
- Okay.
- Yeah?
1341
00:57:55,036 --> 00:57:56,516
Oh, I should not be here.
1342
00:57:56,516 --> 00:57:57,952
- Okay, you know what?
- You, you--
1343
00:57:57,952 --> 00:57:59,519
I've got a date
with Tom Cruise tonight, so.
1344
00:57:59,519 --> 00:58:00,999
Okay, good.
Um, well, hey,
1345
00:58:00,999 --> 00:58:03,044
I wi-- I wish you were
at that cinema.
1346
00:58:03,044 --> 00:58:04,872
Thanks, Nardo. Good luck.
1347
00:58:04,872 --> 00:58:06,744
♪ Kiss me twice
1348
00:58:06,744 --> 00:58:08,789
♪ Kiss me once again
1349
00:58:08,789 --> 00:58:10,051
♪ It's been a long time
1350
00:58:10,051 --> 00:58:12,097
- ♪ Oh, yeah.
1351
00:58:13,664 --> 00:58:15,274
Bernard, there's smoke coming
through the vents.
1352
00:58:15,274 --> 00:58:16,623
Everything okay in there?
1353
00:58:19,931 --> 00:58:22,063
Oh.
1354
00:58:23,630 --> 00:58:24,979
Ah, Flora.
1355
00:58:24,979 --> 00:58:26,285
- Here we go!
And now,
1356
00:58:26,285 --> 00:58:27,591
for your feature presentation.
1357
00:58:27,591 --> 00:58:28,809
Here we go, here we go.
1358
00:58:28,809 --> 00:58:31,203
Here we go. Woo-hoo!
1359
00:58:33,771 --> 00:58:35,816
Buddy, you're lucky
we got here in time.
1360
00:58:35,816 --> 00:58:38,558
What are you doing with
an open fire in there anyways?
1361
00:58:38,558 --> 00:58:39,777
That's completely illegal.
1362
00:58:41,169 --> 00:58:43,171
Hey, Ricky. The Mona Lisa.
1363
00:58:43,171 --> 00:58:45,652
It's missing, ain't it?
1364
00:58:45,652 --> 00:58:47,654
Yeah.
1365
00:58:47,654 --> 00:58:49,003
I-Is it?
1366
00:58:49,003 --> 00:58:51,658
- Yeah.
- It's right there.
1367
00:58:51,658 --> 00:58:54,705
I wish I could swap
the jersey back.
1368
00:58:54,705 --> 00:58:58,143
Give it to me,
Mr. Thomas Cruise Control.
1369
00:59:00,145 --> 00:59:01,581
Come on, lock up, baby.
1370
00:59:05,150 --> 00:59:07,848
You okay, buddy?
1371
00:59:11,896 --> 00:59:13,201
Wow, Bernie.
1372
00:59:13,201 --> 00:59:15,029
Been a busy night, huh?
1373
00:59:15,029 --> 00:59:16,988
Yeah, it sure has.
1374
00:59:19,425 --> 00:59:22,167
Hey, we'll get you out, buddy.
1375
00:59:22,167 --> 00:59:24,604
- Stay strong.
1376
00:59:39,271 --> 00:59:40,881
Okay, kid.
1377
00:59:40,881 --> 00:59:43,188
The good news is that
it's gonna take a bit
1378
00:59:43,188 --> 00:59:45,930
to extradite you to France, so...
1379
00:59:45,930 --> 00:59:49,716
you'll be here in a nice, warm
American cell over Christmas.
1380
00:59:49,716 --> 00:59:52,371
- Mm-hmm.
- It's not very good news.
1381
00:59:52,371 --> 00:59:54,895
I mean, if...
1382
00:59:54,895 --> 00:59:56,680
if I miss Christmas,
1383
00:59:56,680 --> 00:59:58,290
my life is over.
1384
00:59:58,290 --> 01:00:02,686
Missing Christmas is the least
of your problems, buddy.
1385
01:00:03,687 --> 01:00:07,734
Do you know anything about
the French penal system?
1386
01:00:07,734 --> 01:00:08,996
Uh, n-no.
1387
01:00:08,996 --> 01:00:12,043
Think Texas Chainsaw Massacre
1388
01:00:12,043 --> 01:00:17,091
where everyone is dressed
like Inspector Clouseau.
1389
01:00:17,091 --> 01:00:19,659
- This can't be happening.
- It's happening,
1390
01:00:19,659 --> 01:00:22,749
but the solution is
quite simple.
1391
01:00:22,749 --> 01:00:25,970
All you got to do...
Look at me, look at me.
1392
01:00:27,711 --> 01:00:29,974
Tell me the truth. Come on.
1393
01:00:32,150 --> 01:00:34,369
Okay, okay.
1394
01:00:34,369 --> 01:00:36,110
Now we're talking.
1395
01:00:36,110 --> 01:00:38,678
Okay. Okay.
1396
01:00:38,678 --> 01:00:41,115
The-the truth is...
1397
01:00:41,115 --> 01:00:43,161
I had an accomplice.
1398
01:00:45,119 --> 01:00:47,818
Officer Pepper to the bullpen.
1399
01:00:48,993 --> 01:00:51,299
Wow. Look at these digs.
1400
01:00:51,299 --> 01:00:53,084
You do okay, don't you?
1401
01:00:53,084 --> 01:00:54,955
- Is that the bad guy?
- What?
1402
01:00:54,955 --> 01:00:57,436
Nardo, I am here!
I am in the building!
1403
01:00:57,436 --> 01:00:59,220
Eagle has landed.
1404
01:00:59,220 --> 01:01:00,961
- Nardo, I am in the building.
Ma'am. Ma'am.
1405
01:01:00,961 --> 01:01:03,790
- Please don't do that.
- Got it.
1406
01:01:03,790 --> 01:01:06,097
I thought that's
what it was there for.
1407
01:01:06,097 --> 01:01:09,056
So sor-- [gasps] Wha--
You guys both have guns.
1408
01:01:09,056 --> 01:01:10,492
I just have my dagger.
1409
01:01:10,492 --> 01:01:12,843
- What? No. Put your hands up!
1410
01:01:12,843 --> 01:01:14,453
Oh, that's nice.
1411
01:01:18,413 --> 01:01:19,719
Quit screwing around.
1412
01:01:19,719 --> 01:01:20,720
Take your hat off.
1413
01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:21,895
Okay. I'll do that.
1414
01:01:21,895 --> 01:01:24,245
Commencing interview.
1415
01:01:25,551 --> 01:01:27,771
- Is-is this for me?
- Okay.
1416
01:01:27,771 --> 01:01:29,163
Thank you very much.
1417
01:01:29,163 --> 01:01:30,991
You're welcome.
1418
01:01:32,384 --> 01:01:33,341
Name.
1419
01:01:33,341 --> 01:01:35,126
- Mine?
- Yes.
1420
01:01:35,126 --> 01:01:36,388
Oh, okay.
1421
01:01:36,388 --> 01:01:40,087
Hi, there, um,
Flora Gwendolen Locheed,
1422
01:01:40,087 --> 01:01:43,525
uh, Firepit McAllister Cruise.
1423
01:01:43,525 --> 01:01:46,311
Is that, is that a "Cruz"
with a "U-Z"?
1424
01:01:46,311 --> 01:01:47,921
- S-E.
- S-E.
1425
01:01:47,921 --> 01:01:50,750
- As in, as in Tom.
- Okay.
1426
01:01:50,750 --> 01:01:52,491
Date of birth.
1427
01:01:52,491 --> 01:01:56,843
Let's see, it's second day of
the Feast of Angus the Fierce.
1428
01:01:56,843 --> 01:01:59,367
Yes. Second day. -But
what year of the second day?
1429
01:01:59,367 --> 01:02:02,283
- Oh, geez.
- I need a month. I need a year.
1430
01:02:02,283 --> 01:02:05,809
You know what?
I'm gonna say 2,152 years ago
1431
01:02:05,809 --> 01:02:08,420
is probably...
1432
01:02:08,420 --> 01:02:11,031
I think
that's pretty darn close.
1433
01:02:12,032 --> 01:02:17,429
Okay, we're gonna put down 1969
from the looks of it.
1434
01:02:18,430 --> 01:02:20,127
- Okay.
- Okay.
1435
01:02:20,127 --> 01:02:22,782
- What's your profession?
- How do I--
1436
01:02:22,782 --> 01:02:25,567
Well, okay, I guess
the honest answer would be...
1437
01:02:25,567 --> 01:02:27,482
I, you know, dabbled
in a little bit of
1438
01:02:27,482 --> 01:02:30,355
being a warrior/hunter-gatherer,
1439
01:02:30,355 --> 01:02:33,880
but now, really, I strictly
just, uh, I'm a genie.
1440
01:02:33,880 --> 01:02:36,056
Uh, what was the last part?
1441
01:02:36,056 --> 01:02:39,190
Uh, but now
I'm, uh, just a genie.
1442
01:02:39,190 --> 01:02:41,061
Okay.
1443
01:02:42,846 --> 01:02:44,369
You believe that you're a genie?
1444
01:02:44,369 --> 01:02:46,284
Well, I know I'm a genie.
1445
01:02:46,284 --> 01:02:48,982
- You know you're a genie?
- Yes, because I'm a genie.
1446
01:02:49,983 --> 01:02:51,550
Uh, so, what kind of
prescription drugs
1447
01:02:51,550 --> 01:02:52,594
are you on now?
1448
01:02:52,594 --> 01:02:53,987
Ooh.
1449
01:02:53,987 --> 01:02:55,293
I don't know.
What have you got?
1450
01:02:55,293 --> 01:02:56,990
What are you offering?
1451
01:02:58,600 --> 01:03:00,472
Okay, look, uh...
1452
01:03:00,472 --> 01:03:02,430
I'm gonna be honest with you.
1453
01:03:02,430 --> 01:03:05,520
I don't know if this is
some kind of bit you're doing,
1454
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:09,133
you're crazy, or what, but...
1455
01:03:09,133 --> 01:03:10,395
I want to run with this
for a second.
1456
01:03:10,395 --> 01:03:12,353
- Okay?
- Okay.
1457
01:03:12,353 --> 01:03:14,442
So you are this magical genie.
1458
01:03:14,442 --> 01:03:17,271
- That's correct.
- So, if that's the case,
1459
01:03:17,271 --> 01:03:19,317
you have to know exactly
1460
01:03:19,317 --> 01:03:22,581
what you and your friend Bernard
are in for with prison.
1461
01:03:22,581 --> 01:03:24,539
Okay? You're gonna be stuck
1462
01:03:24,539 --> 01:03:27,325
in a little square box
for eternity.
1463
01:03:28,587 --> 01:03:30,502
No friends.
1464
01:03:30,502 --> 01:03:32,156
No family.
1465
01:03:32,156 --> 01:03:34,245
No freedom.
1466
01:03:34,245 --> 01:03:37,291
How does that sound to you?
1467
01:03:40,555 --> 01:03:42,470
Familiar.
1468
01:03:59,444 --> 01:04:01,315
Get ready, buddy boy.
1469
01:04:01,315 --> 01:04:03,448
December 23.
1470
01:04:03,448 --> 01:04:05,493
Guess where you're going?
1471
01:04:05,493 --> 01:04:07,495
JFK.
1472
01:04:07,495 --> 01:04:10,672
We're transferring you
and Ms. McAllister to France
1473
01:04:10,672 --> 01:04:13,066
immediately.
1474
01:04:13,066 --> 01:04:15,547
Goodbye. Arrivederci.
1475
01:04:15,547 --> 01:04:18,202
Adios. Salaam alaikum salaam.
1476
01:04:20,378 --> 01:04:22,946
Right, well, I-I guess we're
just gonna have to live
1477
01:04:22,946 --> 01:04:24,991
with the consequences
of our actions.
1478
01:04:24,991 --> 01:04:28,212
Right? Just-just two crooks
1479
01:04:28,212 --> 01:04:29,996
in the back of
a high-security van,
1480
01:04:29,996 --> 01:04:32,346
wishing they'd never got greedy.
1481
01:04:32,346 --> 01:04:34,914
You're funny, that's
what I like about you, Bernard.
1482
01:04:34,914 --> 01:04:37,525
Like, as if we're gonna put you
both in the same vehicle
1483
01:04:37,525 --> 01:04:40,702
for hours so you could get
your story straight.
1484
01:04:40,702 --> 01:04:43,531
What kind of idiots
do you think we are?
1485
01:04:45,359 --> 01:04:46,491
Right.
1486
01:04:46,491 --> 01:04:49,146
Hey. Get him out.
1487
01:04:55,326 --> 01:04:57,067
Hmm.
1488
01:05:09,775 --> 01:05:12,038
Flora!
1489
01:05:12,038 --> 01:05:14,432
I wish we could swap back!
1490
01:05:14,432 --> 01:05:16,434
Oh, so now
you want to talk, huh?
1491
01:05:23,006 --> 01:05:24,485
Hey, hey.
1492
01:05:24,485 --> 01:05:25,530
- All right, come on.
- Flora, it's me, it's Bernie.
1493
01:05:25,530 --> 01:05:27,314
I wish we could swap back.
1494
01:05:27,314 --> 01:05:29,012
- I wish we could swap back.
Hey, buddy, buddy.
1495
01:05:29,012 --> 01:05:30,578
I wish we could
swap that painting back.
1496
01:05:30,578 --> 01:05:31,579
Get him out of here.
1497
01:05:35,235 --> 01:05:37,063
Seriously.
1498
01:05:37,063 --> 01:05:39,065
- You okay?
- Yeah, thanks.
1499
01:05:39,065 --> 01:05:40,153
Wow.
1500
01:05:46,029 --> 01:05:47,291
- Yeah?
Detective Perez,
1501
01:05:47,291 --> 01:05:48,988
we have the French.
1502
01:05:48,988 --> 01:05:51,469
- The French? Put 'em on.
- Yeah.
1503
01:05:54,646 --> 01:05:56,343
Bonjour.
1504
01:06:01,305 --> 01:06:04,134
Bring me the painting!
1505
01:06:05,222 --> 01:06:07,224
It's not a painting, sir.
1506
01:06:07,224 --> 01:06:09,095
I know it's not a painting.
1507
01:06:09,095 --> 01:06:11,184
It's the painting.
1508
01:06:11,184 --> 01:06:14,274
The most valuable painting
in the world.
1509
01:06:14,274 --> 01:06:15,972
You're not gonna
like this, boss.
1510
01:06:18,452 --> 01:06:19,714
It's a jersey.
1511
01:06:23,066 --> 01:06:25,242
I'm gonna have to kill someone.
1512
01:06:27,722 --> 01:06:30,421
- That was close.
- Way too close.
1513
01:06:30,421 --> 01:06:32,292
We could've been fairly
and squarely screwed.
1514
01:06:32,292 --> 01:06:34,033
The wishing has to stop, right?
1515
01:06:34,033 --> 01:06:35,817
Well, yeah, maybe.
1516
01:06:35,817 --> 01:06:37,384
- Except...
- Except what?
1517
01:06:37,384 --> 01:06:38,820
Well, I mean,
except Julie and Eve
1518
01:06:38,820 --> 01:06:40,300
are gonna arrive at mine
any minute.
1519
01:06:40,300 --> 01:06:41,649
Okay, that's okay.
I mean, this is like
1520
01:06:41,649 --> 01:06:44,261
classic Flora and Nardo stuff, right?
1521
01:06:44,261 --> 01:06:47,307
I mean, kicking names
and taking butts.
1522
01:06:47,307 --> 01:06:48,700
This is what we do.
1523
01:06:50,658 --> 01:06:52,312
- Uh...
- Okay.
1524
01:06:52,312 --> 01:06:54,140
So, yeah, they're nearly here, so...
1525
01:06:54,140 --> 01:06:56,099
- Okay, okay. What do we do?
- So...
1526
01:06:56,099 --> 01:06:58,144
Oh, uh...
1527
01:06:58,144 --> 01:07:00,407
Just wondered if you could
maybe go invisible.
1528
01:07:00,407 --> 01:07:01,843
You know, just...
1529
01:07:01,843 --> 01:07:03,193
- Just-- Yeah.
- No, that's-- No, of course.
1530
01:07:03,193 --> 01:07:04,498
That's the right thing.
1531
01:07:04,498 --> 01:07:06,718
- Okay, good luck.
- Thank you.
1532
01:07:18,469 --> 01:07:20,340
Bye, Grandma.
1533
01:07:24,562 --> 01:07:26,433
- Hey, hey, sweetie.
- Dad!
1534
01:07:26,433 --> 01:07:28,609
Ah.
1535
01:07:28,609 --> 01:07:30,524
- How you doing? Yeah?
- Good.
1536
01:07:30,524 --> 01:07:32,526
- Hey.
- Hey, um, all right.
1537
01:07:32,526 --> 01:07:34,137
Well, I'll leave you to it.
1538
01:07:34,137 --> 01:07:36,835
- Thank you.
- Have a good time, you two.
1539
01:07:36,835 --> 01:07:38,402
- Yeah. Uh, you, too.
- Bye, Mom.
1540
01:07:38,402 --> 01:07:40,360
Yeah.
1541
01:07:43,537 --> 01:07:45,191
What you got in the bag, huh?
1542
01:07:45,191 --> 01:07:47,193
You look so cute in this jumper.
1543
01:07:47,193 --> 01:07:48,325
- Thank you.
- Where'd you get it?
1544
01:07:48,325 --> 01:07:49,848
Oh, Grandma got it for me.
1545
01:07:49,848 --> 01:07:51,371
Grandma got it for you.
Did you get me anything?
1546
01:07:51,371 --> 01:07:53,765
Mm. Sorry.
1547
01:08:01,338 --> 01:08:02,904
This is the big chimney, right?
1548
01:08:02,904 --> 01:08:05,559
How many little chimneys
can you put there?
1549
01:08:05,559 --> 01:08:07,822
You have to make sure you don't
tell Mum that we've exclusively
1550
01:08:07,822 --> 01:08:09,781
been eating sugar
for the last 48 hours.
1551
01:08:09,781 --> 01:08:11,435
I won't.
1552
01:08:11,435 --> 01:08:12,784
I can keep a secret.
1553
01:08:12,784 --> 01:08:14,394
I never told Mom
about you smoking
1554
01:08:14,394 --> 01:08:15,569
when she was
at her high school reunion.
1555
01:08:15,569 --> 01:08:17,919
BERNARD and FLORA:
Oh!
1556
01:08:17,919 --> 01:08:19,791
Burn.
1557
01:08:19,791 --> 01:08:22,272
But you still kind of
keep things from me.
1558
01:08:22,272 --> 01:08:24,274
Me? What are you talking about?
1559
01:08:24,274 --> 01:08:25,579
I'm your dad.
I tell you everything.
1560
01:08:25,579 --> 01:08:27,146
Dad, all of a sudden,
1561
01:08:27,146 --> 01:08:29,714
there's a random lady
living in our house?
1562
01:08:31,629 --> 01:08:33,544
Oh, she's good. Real good.
1563
01:08:34,719 --> 01:08:37,765
Okay. Well, I mean,
the-the truth...
1564
01:08:37,765 --> 01:08:38,766
I mean, do you want to
do the honors?
1565
01:08:38,766 --> 01:08:40,246
You're the boss.
1566
01:08:40,246 --> 01:08:42,683
Yeah, of course.
I forget that sometimes.
1567
01:08:42,683 --> 01:08:44,250
Okay, I'm gonna tell her.
I'm gonna tell you.
1568
01:08:44,250 --> 01:08:45,512
- Listen, okay.
- Mm-hmm.
1569
01:08:45,512 --> 01:08:47,253
So, um...
1570
01:08:47,253 --> 01:08:48,776
Flora here, fabulous Flora...
1571
01:08:48,776 --> 01:08:50,865
- Oh, thank you.
- Thank you.
1572
01:08:54,434 --> 01:08:55,740
She's a genie.
1573
01:08:55,740 --> 01:08:57,481
Ta-da.
1574
01:08:57,481 --> 01:08:59,178
Dad, I'm eight.
1575
01:08:59,178 --> 01:09:00,745
You got to come up
with something better than that.
1576
01:09:00,745 --> 01:09:02,486
- No, it's true.
- That's a tough cookie.
1577
01:09:02,486 --> 01:09:04,270
- Wow.
- She is. She really is.
1578
01:09:04,270 --> 01:09:06,316
So, Flora, you're a genie?
1579
01:09:06,316 --> 01:09:07,839
- I am.
- So, in that case,
1580
01:09:07,839 --> 01:09:09,797
you must have
a magic flying carpet.
1581
01:09:09,797 --> 01:09:12,539
- Funny you should mention that.
1582
01:09:28,338 --> 01:09:30,775
- Hey, should we have some fun?
- Yeah!
1583
01:09:42,874 --> 01:09:44,354
Let's go, let's go!
1584
01:09:47,226 --> 01:09:48,706
Yeah!
1585
01:09:50,708 --> 01:09:52,666
Oh, oh, oh,
look at this guy. Wait.
1586
01:09:53,754 --> 01:09:55,234
- Go home!
1587
01:09:55,234 --> 01:09:57,715
- It's Christmas!
- Go home!
1588
01:10:01,066 --> 01:10:02,981
Whoa!
Did you see his face?
1589
01:10:17,082 --> 01:10:19,911
- Ready to go to Grandma's?
- Mm-hmm.
1590
01:10:23,654 --> 01:10:25,612
Thank you, Flora.
1591
01:10:25,612 --> 01:10:27,310
That was the best day
of her life.
1592
01:10:36,971 --> 01:10:41,367
So, you've done everything
for Julie and Eve.
1593
01:10:41,367 --> 01:10:43,587
I was just wondering
if there's maybe something
1594
01:10:43,587 --> 01:10:45,980
that you want for Christmas.
1595
01:10:47,765 --> 01:10:49,723
Well, you know what?
I-I did have
1596
01:10:49,723 --> 01:10:51,421
one or two little thoughts.
1597
01:10:52,422 --> 01:10:54,728
And finally,
a charming Christmas story.
1598
01:10:54,728 --> 01:10:57,078
This evening,
the Bowery Mission received
1599
01:10:57,078 --> 01:10:59,472
an unexpected donation
from Oliver Flaxman,
1600
01:10:59,472 --> 01:11:02,345
owner of New York's own
Flaxman's Auction House.
1601
01:11:02,345 --> 01:11:04,912
The check for $100 million
makes up
1602
01:11:04,912 --> 01:11:07,480
the entirety of
Flaxman's personal fortune,
1603
01:11:07,480 --> 01:11:09,613
and it will go towards
feeding and caring
1604
01:11:09,613 --> 01:11:11,092
for the unhoused this Christmas.
1605
01:11:11,092 --> 01:11:13,399
We go down to
Flaxman's Auctions now,
1606
01:11:13,399 --> 01:11:15,532
where a grateful crowd
has gathered.
1607
01:11:15,532 --> 01:11:16,968
Mr. Oliver Flaxman?
1608
01:11:18,317 --> 01:11:19,927
- Uh, yes.
- What made you make
1609
01:11:19,927 --> 01:11:22,887
such an incredibly
generous gesture?
1610
01:11:22,887 --> 01:11:24,758
What gesture?
1611
01:11:24,758 --> 01:11:26,456
Oh, my God. -REPORTER: Well,
the Bowery Mission just received
1612
01:11:26,456 --> 01:11:29,763
a $100 million charity check
from you. -Oh, wait.
1613
01:11:29,763 --> 01:11:32,679
Which was just deposited
to help feed the unhoused
1614
01:11:32,679 --> 01:11:33,811
- this Christmas.
1615
01:11:33,811 --> 01:11:35,769
That's right.
1616
01:11:35,769 --> 01:11:37,989
Well, you've become a national
hero because of your generosity.
1617
01:11:37,989 --> 01:11:39,991
I have?
1618
01:11:39,991 --> 01:11:41,601
Could I, could I just have
a moment?
1619
01:11:41,601 --> 01:11:42,776
Absolutely.
1620
01:11:42,776 --> 01:11:45,431
- Yeah.
- You suck. Boo!
1621
01:11:45,431 --> 01:11:46,606
- Boo.
1622
01:11:46,606 --> 01:11:47,955
And what a wonderful story
that is.
1623
01:11:47,955 --> 01:11:49,000
- That's it for tonight.
1624
01:11:49,000 --> 01:11:50,915
From all of us here, goodbye
1625
01:11:50,915 --> 01:11:53,091
- and very merry Christmas Eve.
- That's the way. Nicely done.
1626
01:11:54,092 --> 01:11:57,138
Uh...
you got to be kidding me.
1627
01:11:57,138 --> 01:12:01,012
This is it. Best present ever.
1628
01:12:01,012 --> 01:12:02,492
What do you think?
Do you like it?
1629
01:12:02,492 --> 01:12:03,623
- I-- Well, uh, come on.
1630
01:12:04,972 --> 01:12:06,365
I don't know,
when-when we first met,
1631
01:12:06,365 --> 01:12:07,714
I was, I was just...
1632
01:12:07,714 --> 01:12:09,455
I was the most unhappy man
in the world.
1633
01:12:09,455 --> 01:12:12,415
I'd-I'd lost everything,
but at least I have Eve back.
1634
01:12:12,415 --> 01:12:13,633
Yeah.
1635
01:12:13,633 --> 01:12:15,592
Now, I'm...
1636
01:12:15,592 --> 01:12:17,376
you know,
I'm-I'm so much better,
1637
01:12:17,376 --> 01:12:20,553
so I-I wanted to get you
something special for Christmas.
1638
01:12:20,553 --> 01:12:22,163
And you have. I mean,
I have everything
1639
01:12:22,163 --> 01:12:24,644
I could ever want.
1640
01:12:24,644 --> 01:12:27,168
Well, not quite everything.
1641
01:12:27,168 --> 01:12:29,649
Did-did you see the card
that came with it?
1642
01:12:29,649 --> 01:12:32,652
Oh. What?
1643
01:12:32,652 --> 01:12:34,654
Oh.
1644
01:12:38,441 --> 01:12:40,399
Please be a hot chocolate
gift certificate.
1645
01:12:40,399 --> 01:12:41,835
- Please.
- Just read the card.
1646
01:12:41,835 --> 01:12:42,923
Read the card.
1647
01:12:42,923 --> 01:12:44,838
Ah.
1648
01:12:44,838 --> 01:12:46,579
That's great.
1649
01:12:54,021 --> 01:12:55,371
I...
1650
01:13:00,680 --> 01:13:03,596
We're equals, Flora.
1651
01:13:03,596 --> 01:13:07,557
Now, how can things go well
for me and not for both of us?
1652
01:13:10,951 --> 01:13:13,954
I don't think I remember
how to have my own life.
1653
01:13:16,174 --> 01:13:18,394
I think you'll get
the hang of it.
1654
01:13:19,525 --> 01:13:22,180
And I thought
the sweatshirt was good.
1655
01:13:22,180 --> 01:13:24,574
- I mean, mm...
1656
01:13:24,574 --> 01:13:26,576
- I mean, it is.
1657
01:13:29,274 --> 01:13:31,798
Yeah, that's, um,
that's my last wish.
1658
01:13:32,756 --> 01:13:35,541
How do you,
how do you want to do it?
1659
01:13:35,541 --> 01:13:38,544
Well, it comes with a bit of...
of good news.
1660
01:13:38,544 --> 01:13:41,939
Um, when a genie goes,
1661
01:13:41,939 --> 01:13:44,942
you know, usually people realize
that they forgot something,
1662
01:13:44,942 --> 01:13:47,727
so when I go,
1663
01:13:47,727 --> 01:13:50,600
you're still allowed
three wishes.
1664
01:13:50,600 --> 01:13:53,559
No, that's where the three
wishes thing comes from.
1665
01:13:53,559 --> 01:13:56,257
That's where the three wishes
thing comes from.
1666
01:13:56,257 --> 01:13:59,565
You-you got any ideas?
1667
01:13:59,565 --> 01:14:02,568
You know, I think
the whole point is that
1668
01:14:02,568 --> 01:14:05,136
you'll know what you need
when it happens.
1669
01:14:06,180 --> 01:14:08,966
So I'm just gonna leave that
to you, my friend.
1670
01:14:22,022 --> 01:14:24,198
Should I do it?
1671
01:14:25,722 --> 01:14:27,593
- Do it. Do it.
- Do it?
1672
01:14:27,593 --> 01:14:29,160
Okay.
1673
01:14:34,078 --> 01:14:35,949
I guess this is...
1674
01:14:35,949 --> 01:14:37,951
this is the end.
1675
01:14:37,951 --> 01:14:39,779
Yeah, I'm...
out of here.
1676
01:14:39,779 --> 01:14:42,173
- Where are you gonna go?
- Uh...
1677
01:14:42,173 --> 01:14:45,132
you know, I'm still
kind of mulling that over.
1678
01:14:45,132 --> 01:14:47,221
I've actually thought
about going home.
1679
01:14:47,221 --> 01:14:49,963
Some unfinished business
with a, uh,
1680
01:14:49,963 --> 01:14:52,139
- sorcerer from hell.
- Yeah, but
1681
01:14:52,139 --> 01:14:54,011
you can't go back in time.
That's rule number one.
1682
01:14:54,011 --> 01:14:56,535
Uh, actually, that's...
1683
01:14:56,535 --> 01:14:59,233
How do I put--?
That's not 100% true.
1684
01:14:59,233 --> 01:15:02,585
For, as far as genie rule
number one, really,
1685
01:15:02,585 --> 01:15:04,717
you-you tell the boss
that, you know,
1686
01:15:04,717 --> 01:15:06,806
time travel is
out of the question
1687
01:15:06,806 --> 01:15:08,895
because it's,
it's really dangerous.
1688
01:15:08,895 --> 01:15:10,941
So it's for your protection
and also
1689
01:15:10,941 --> 01:15:14,161
'cause people make horrible
decisions usually, so...
1690
01:15:14,161 --> 01:15:16,163
But, I mean, is it literally
1691
01:15:16,163 --> 01:15:18,905
out of the question? No.
1692
01:15:18,905 --> 01:15:20,559
It's not.
1693
01:15:20,559 --> 01:15:23,170
Right, so I could just
wish you back home?
1694
01:15:23,170 --> 01:15:25,216
Well, I don't know, but, I mean,
1695
01:15:25,216 --> 01:15:28,001
I'm still kind of
considering my options.
1696
01:15:28,001 --> 01:15:30,177
I mean, really,
anything could happen.
1697
01:15:30,177 --> 01:15:32,745
You know, I could end up
in Los Angeles with this guy.
1698
01:15:32,745 --> 01:15:34,834
-You know, just
sitting by a pool. We don't,
1699
01:15:34,834 --> 01:15:36,836
we don't know, right?
1700
01:15:36,836 --> 01:15:40,100
Oh, you know what? I almost...
1701
01:15:40,100 --> 01:15:41,841
This is for you.
1702
01:15:41,841 --> 01:15:43,887
And I know I said
1703
01:15:43,887 --> 01:15:46,150
that your final three wishes
1704
01:15:46,150 --> 01:15:48,935
are entirely up to you,
and that's-that's true,
1705
01:15:48,935 --> 01:15:52,156
but maybe consider this
like a hint
1706
01:15:52,156 --> 01:15:55,028
at what one of the wishes
could be.
1707
01:16:02,819 --> 01:16:04,385
So what's it mean?
1708
01:16:04,385 --> 01:16:06,562
We'll get to that in a minute.
1709
01:16:07,780 --> 01:16:10,043
Okay, I want to say
something to you.
1710
01:16:10,043 --> 01:16:12,350
Uh... and
1711
01:16:12,350 --> 01:16:14,874
I just think it's important
that you really hear me.
1712
01:16:14,874 --> 01:16:17,007
So years from now,
1713
01:16:17,007 --> 01:16:19,009
when you're old,
1714
01:16:19,009 --> 01:16:22,273
and gray, and probably
doughy in the middle.
1715
01:16:22,273 --> 01:16:23,883
When you're sitting around
1716
01:16:23,883 --> 01:16:25,842
reading stories
about my old pal,
1717
01:16:25,842 --> 01:16:27,757
JC, in-in your,
1718
01:16:27,757 --> 01:16:29,236
in your "Bibble" and--
1719
01:16:29,236 --> 01:16:32,239
- It's Bible, but...
- Whatever.
1720
01:16:32,239 --> 01:16:34,241
When you come to the phrase,
1721
01:16:34,241 --> 01:16:36,896
"The multitude gathered,"
1722
01:16:36,896 --> 01:16:39,420
I want you to remember
1723
01:16:39,420 --> 01:16:42,423
that one of 'em found you
1724
01:16:42,423 --> 01:16:46,253
to be the very best friend
that she'd ever had.
1725
01:16:47,428 --> 01:16:49,343
Okay? And, uh,
1726
01:16:49,343 --> 01:16:51,824
I never really
trusted people because...
1727
01:16:51,824 --> 01:16:54,087
they're greedy
and they're selfish.
1728
01:16:57,134 --> 01:16:59,049
But, Bernard,
1729
01:16:59,049 --> 01:17:02,139
that's not ever you.
1730
01:17:08,406 --> 01:17:11,191
This is all getting
a bit too emotional.
1731
01:17:11,191 --> 01:17:13,846
I-I-I wish you'd just go.
1732
01:17:13,846 --> 01:17:16,196
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I was, I was just--
1733
01:17:27,164 --> 01:17:28,948
- It's so weird.
- I know.
1734
01:17:28,948 --> 01:17:31,908
I can't believe she just left.
She just took off?
1735
01:17:31,908 --> 01:17:33,779
Well, I mean, she didn't
so much as leave.
1736
01:17:33,779 --> 01:17:35,302
She sort of disappeared,
you know?
1737
01:17:35,302 --> 01:17:36,956
I thought we had a, you know--
She didn't say,
1738
01:17:36,956 --> 01:17:38,305
she didn't say,
she didn't say goodbye.
1739
01:17:38,305 --> 01:17:40,220
I know.
It's a complicated situation.
1740
01:17:40,220 --> 01:17:42,440
The weird thing is
she left this thing for me
1741
01:17:42,440 --> 01:17:44,790
and I-I can't make
head nor tail of it.
1742
01:17:44,790 --> 01:17:47,358
- What? It's a number.
- I know, but...
1743
01:17:47,358 --> 01:17:49,926
Maybe it's a...
international phone number.
1744
01:17:49,926 --> 01:17:52,972
Yeah, that's a good idea
actually. Like a plus four-four?
1745
01:17:52,972 --> 01:17:54,844
I don't know what that means.
1746
01:17:56,019 --> 01:17:58,021
We're sorry
your call cannot be completed.
1747
01:17:58,021 --> 01:17:59,892
- No.
- Oh!
1748
01:17:59,892 --> 01:18:02,199
It's a lottery number.
She had a vision.
1749
01:18:02,199 --> 01:18:04,723
We're gonna be rich.
1750
01:18:04,723 --> 01:18:05,985
We'll just wait until
the drawing. -Wait, hold on.
1751
01:18:05,985 --> 01:18:07,900
- Hold on. Pass me that pad.
- What?
1752
01:18:07,900 --> 01:18:09,989
- This?
- Yeah.
1753
01:18:14,385 --> 01:18:16,169
Oh, look at that.
You're doing math.
1754
01:18:16,169 --> 01:18:19,172
I-- You never think you're
gonna use it and then you...
1755
01:18:22,785 --> 01:18:25,135
You're a genius.
I could kiss you. -What?
1756
01:18:25,135 --> 01:18:26,919
- What? What happened?
- Good night. Good night!
1757
01:18:26,919 --> 01:18:28,225
Are we gonna win money?
1758
01:18:28,225 --> 01:18:30,706
Just let me wet my beak.
1759
01:18:32,446 --> 01:18:34,013
Flora,
1760
01:18:34,013 --> 01:18:36,059
my dear friend,
1761
01:18:36,059 --> 01:18:39,932
for the first
of my last three wishes,
1762
01:18:39,932 --> 01:18:42,065
I wish
1763
01:18:42,065 --> 01:18:44,197
I was back
to the very beginning.
1764
01:18:46,373 --> 01:18:48,898
♪ Little darlin'
1765
01:18:48,898 --> 01:18:51,465
♪ Don't you cry
1766
01:18:51,465 --> 01:18:56,209
♪ You know I tried to be there
with you by and by ♪
1767
01:18:56,209 --> 01:18:59,865
♪ When everything
is goin' wrong ♪
1768
01:18:59,865 --> 01:19:02,868
♪ Now don't you cry
1769
01:19:02,868 --> 01:19:04,522
♪ I'm wishin'
1770
01:19:05,566 --> 01:19:08,091
Bernard, this is Henry Hackford
1771
01:19:08,091 --> 01:19:10,267
of the Metropolitan Museum
of Art.
1772
01:19:10,267 --> 01:19:11,964
Ah, yes.
An honor to meet you, sir.
1773
01:19:11,964 --> 01:19:13,400
Nice to meet you, too.
1774
01:19:13,400 --> 01:19:15,228
I'd like you to take him
through your new catalog.
1775
01:19:15,228 --> 01:19:17,448
Yes, of course.
1776
01:19:17,448 --> 01:19:19,842
I'd love to oblige,
but I'm afraid
1777
01:19:19,842 --> 01:19:22,148
taking my daughter out for her
birthday is far more important
1778
01:19:22,148 --> 01:19:25,412
than following
the orders of a slimy,
1779
01:19:25,412 --> 01:19:28,372
nasty, seedy, supercilious,
1780
01:19:28,372 --> 01:19:31,244
gloating, ghastly, greedy
rip-off merchant like you.
1781
01:19:31,244 --> 01:19:33,899
So goodbye.
1782
01:19:33,899 --> 01:19:35,814
Have a very Merry Christmas.
1783
01:19:35,814 --> 01:19:38,295
And, oh, of course, I quit.
1784
01:19:38,295 --> 01:19:41,515
But, hey, you can keep
the ugly bear. -
1785
01:19:41,515 --> 01:19:45,041
♪ I wish that everything
1786
01:19:45,041 --> 01:19:47,826
♪ Was gold
1787
01:19:47,826 --> 01:19:50,437
♪ I wish you
1788
01:19:50,437 --> 01:19:53,919
♪ Were here to hold
1789
01:19:53,919 --> 01:19:57,836
♪ I'm wishin'
1790
01:19:57,836 --> 01:20:02,058
♪ Everything gold
1791
01:20:04,147 --> 01:20:06,497
♪ Wishin'
1792
01:20:08,673 --> 01:20:13,199
♪ Everything gold
1793
01:20:14,679 --> 01:20:16,855
♪ Wishin'
1794
01:20:19,989 --> 01:20:23,557
♪ Hold on to love,
hold on to love. ♪
1795
01:20:32,088 --> 01:20:33,437
Hey.
1796
01:20:36,005 --> 01:20:37,528
Hey.
1797
01:20:37,528 --> 01:20:39,530
You look beautiful.
1798
01:20:39,530 --> 01:20:41,314
What you trying
to butter me up for?
1799
01:20:42,968 --> 01:20:44,883
I really didn't think
you were gonna make it.
1800
01:20:44,883 --> 01:20:46,929
- No?
- No.
1801
01:20:48,017 --> 01:20:49,540
Okay, too much mascara?
1802
01:20:49,540 --> 01:20:51,368
Do I look like an owl?
1803
01:20:52,543 --> 01:20:54,632
You look perfect.
1804
01:20:54,632 --> 01:20:57,026
- Bernie, what?
1805
01:20:58,549 --> 01:21:00,507
Thank you.
1806
01:21:00,507 --> 01:21:02,596
- What is this about?
- Mm.
1807
01:21:04,207 --> 01:21:06,339
Mm.
1808
01:21:08,994 --> 01:21:11,040
Dad!
1809
01:21:11,040 --> 01:21:14,043
Oh, happy birthday, baby doll.
1810
01:21:25,750 --> 01:21:27,926
How was work?
1811
01:21:29,188 --> 01:21:30,624
I quit.
1812
01:21:30,624 --> 01:21:32,931
Excuse me?
1813
01:21:32,931 --> 01:21:35,934
Did you just say the thing
that I have been dreaming
1814
01:21:35,934 --> 01:21:38,545
and-and hoping
and needing you to say
1815
01:21:38,545 --> 01:21:41,418
for, I don't know,
what seems like a lifetime?
1816
01:21:41,418 --> 01:21:43,028
I just figured I need to
1817
01:21:43,028 --> 01:21:44,943
spend a bit more time
with my girls, you know?
1818
01:21:44,943 --> 01:21:46,553
And at last, finally pursue
1819
01:21:46,553 --> 01:21:48,947
that lifelong dream
of a career in modeling.
1820
01:21:48,947 --> 01:21:50,601
Yeah, right.
1821
01:21:50,601 --> 01:21:53,386
I've been telling you,
look at this face.
1822
01:21:53,386 --> 01:21:56,259
Oh, Bernie,
that is such good news.
1823
01:21:57,782 --> 01:22:00,524
I was really getting worried
that maybe someday
1824
01:22:00,524 --> 01:22:03,353
soon we'd have to...
1825
01:22:03,353 --> 01:22:05,311
Yeah, I know.
1826
01:22:05,311 --> 01:22:07,400
No, you don't.
1827
01:22:07,400 --> 01:22:09,925
Trust me, I do.
1828
01:22:17,019 --> 01:22:18,281
Where are we going?
1829
01:22:18,281 --> 01:22:21,110
Oh, yeah. I thought maybe
1830
01:22:21,110 --> 01:22:23,329
this year we could do
something a little bit better
1831
01:22:23,329 --> 01:22:25,244
than skating, I thought
we could take this divine,
1832
01:22:25,244 --> 01:22:27,594
this sophisticated
young lady... -[screams] No!
1833
01:22:27,594 --> 01:22:30,162
Let me go. -...out to
the finest restaurant in town.
1834
01:22:30,162 --> 01:22:32,295
Ooh. -Yeah, I mean,
it's a very important birthday.
1835
01:22:32,295 --> 01:22:34,079
- She's actually eight.
- Eight?
1836
01:22:34,079 --> 01:22:35,472
- You're actually eight, right?
- I'm eight.
1837
01:22:40,042 --> 01:22:41,434
Uh, sorry, excuse me, sir.
1838
01:22:42,653 --> 01:22:44,611
Wow. What do you think, Eve?
1839
01:22:44,611 --> 01:22:46,396
- It's so cool.
- Evening.
1840
01:22:46,396 --> 01:22:48,093
Um, do you have
any spare tables?
1841
01:22:48,093 --> 01:22:51,009
Tonight? Do we have
any spare tables tonight?
1842
01:22:53,316 --> 01:22:55,535
Oh.
1843
01:22:55,535 --> 01:22:57,276
I wish you did.
1844
01:22:59,278 --> 01:23:02,629
Well, it so happens
that we do, sir.
1845
01:23:02,629 --> 01:23:05,284
Come this way. Table for three.
1846
01:23:05,284 --> 01:23:07,243
What did you do?
1847
01:23:07,243 --> 01:23:08,418
I've got this.
1848
01:23:08,418 --> 01:23:11,029
- You flexing, huh?
1849
01:23:11,029 --> 01:23:14,250
You know, I think I'm gonna go
for the Cornish game hen.
1850
01:23:14,250 --> 01:23:16,556
Very good choice, sir. Madam?
1851
01:23:16,556 --> 01:23:19,168
Uh, if I could have
the truffle salad
1852
01:23:19,168 --> 01:23:21,300
and, ooh, the steak tartare?
1853
01:23:21,300 --> 01:23:22,736
Certainly, madam.
1854
01:23:22,736 --> 01:23:24,477
And for you, young lady?
1855
01:23:24,477 --> 01:23:27,350
Peanut butter sandwiches
and cherry ice cream, please?
1856
01:23:27,350 --> 01:23:29,700
I'm afraid we absolutely
cannot serve anything
1857
01:23:29,700 --> 01:23:31,615
that is not on the menu.
1858
01:23:38,796 --> 01:23:40,798
- I wish you could.
1859
01:23:40,798 --> 01:23:44,758
However, seeing as you
asked exceptionally nicely,
1860
01:23:44,758 --> 01:23:47,631
peanut butter sandwiches
and cherry ice cream coming up,
1861
01:23:47,631 --> 01:23:49,372
mademoiselle.
1862
01:23:49,372 --> 01:23:50,808
And perhaps some french fries
and a Coke float?
1863
01:23:50,808 --> 01:23:52,331
Thank you.
1864
01:23:52,331 --> 01:23:54,420
- Thank you. That is sweet.
1865
01:23:54,420 --> 01:23:56,161
Give me some birthday luck.
1866
01:23:56,161 --> 01:23:57,815
You know,
1867
01:23:57,815 --> 01:24:00,252
um, a little toast.
1868
01:24:02,385 --> 01:24:05,388
To my exquisite,
1869
01:24:05,388 --> 01:24:08,217
so-much-smarter-than-me wife.
1870
01:24:09,392 --> 01:24:12,351
And to our hilarious,
now almost totally grown-up,
1871
01:24:12,351 --> 01:24:14,310
little girl
1872
01:24:14,310 --> 01:24:16,442
on her big birthday.
1873
01:24:17,400 --> 01:24:19,837
What more can a man
ever wish for?
1874
01:24:22,318 --> 01:24:23,710
- Cheers.
Cheers.
1875
01:24:23,710 --> 01:24:26,104
- Cheers.
- ♪ Every day
1876
01:24:28,324 --> 01:24:31,762
♪ Will be like a holiday
1877
01:24:34,330 --> 01:24:37,855
♪ When my baby
1878
01:24:39,813 --> 01:24:44,253
♪ When my baby comes home
1879
01:24:47,865 --> 01:24:50,433
♪ Every day
1880
01:24:50,433 --> 01:24:52,739
♪ Oh, yeah
1881
01:24:52,739 --> 01:24:55,786
♪ Will be like a holiday
1882
01:24:55,786 --> 01:24:57,875
♪ Oh, yes, it will
1883
01:24:59,268 --> 01:25:02,271
♪ When my baby
1884
01:25:04,925 --> 01:25:08,625
♪ When my baby comes home
1885
01:25:11,889 --> 01:25:14,892
♪ Oh, every day
1886
01:25:16,720 --> 01:25:19,766
♪ Will be like a holiday
1887
01:25:19,766 --> 01:25:23,379
♪ Oh, yes, it will...
1888
01:25:23,379 --> 01:25:25,859
What do you say
we order in for dinner?
1889
01:25:25,859 --> 01:25:28,514
I don't think either of us
could be bothered to cook.
1890
01:25:28,514 --> 01:25:30,864
That's a great idea. Let me
go out and get something.
1891
01:25:30,864 --> 01:25:33,563
Okay, but maybe we shouldn't do
pizza from that place again.
1892
01:25:33,563 --> 01:25:35,826
Oh, come on, those are
the best pizzas ever.
1893
01:25:35,826 --> 01:25:37,958
You know what? You're right.
Get me that pizza
1894
01:25:37,958 --> 01:25:39,525
- and get it right now.
- Yeah?
1895
01:25:39,525 --> 01:25:41,266
- Yes. Now.
- Really? Mm.
1896
01:25:41,266 --> 01:25:43,355
- Mm.
1897
01:25:51,537 --> 01:25:53,409
Evening, Charles.
1898
01:25:53,409 --> 01:25:55,324
Evening, Mr. Bottle.
1899
01:26:02,766 --> 01:26:04,768
Lenny, how you doing?
1900
01:26:04,768 --> 01:26:06,639
I'm great, man.
I'm living the dream.
1901
01:26:06,639 --> 01:26:08,467
What, are you kidding me?
Beats wearing a uniform
1902
01:26:08,467 --> 01:26:10,948
and hailing cabs
for jerks like you.
1903
01:26:10,948 --> 01:26:12,428
-What are you doing,
you coming in?
1904
01:26:12,428 --> 01:26:13,603
- Yeah, thank you, Chef.
- Oh, great.
1905
01:26:13,603 --> 01:26:15,344
Let me get that door for ya.
1906
01:26:15,344 --> 01:26:18,651
Oh, come on. -Come on,
it's like old times, pal.
1907
01:26:18,651 --> 01:26:20,958
Hey, honey.
1908
01:26:20,958 --> 01:26:22,829
Give us a nice hot one.
1909
01:26:22,829 --> 01:26:24,788
Of course.
1910
01:26:24,788 --> 01:26:27,399
One perfect pepperoni
for old Bernie boy.
1911
01:26:27,399 --> 01:26:29,662
I'm guessing you want
extra pepperoni?
1912
01:26:29,662 --> 01:26:32,274
Yeah. Please.
1913
01:26:34,232 --> 01:26:37,322
Your wish is my command.
1914
01:26:37,322 --> 01:26:38,845
♪ I wish I was
a little bit taller ♪
1915
01:26:38,845 --> 01:26:40,847
♪ I wish I was a baller,
I wish I had a girl ♪
1916
01:26:40,847 --> 01:26:42,675
♪ Who looked good,
I would call her ♪
1917
01:26:42,675 --> 01:26:44,721
♪ I wish I had a rabbit
in a hat with a bat ♪
1918
01:26:44,721 --> 01:26:46,592
♪ And a six-four Impala
1919
01:26:46,592 --> 01:26:48,377
♪ I wish I was
like six-foot-nine ♪
1920
01:26:48,377 --> 01:26:50,335
♪ So I can get with Leoshi
1921
01:26:50,335 --> 01:26:51,945
♪ 'Cause she don't know me
but, yo, she's really fine ♪
1922
01:26:51,945 --> 01:26:54,034
♪ You know I see her all
the time, everywhere I go ♪
1923
01:26:54,034 --> 01:26:55,906
♪ And even in my dreams,
I can scheme ♪
1924
01:26:55,906 --> 01:26:57,647
♪ Of ways to make her mine
'cause I know ♪
1925
01:26:57,647 --> 01:26:59,605
♪ She's livin' phat,
her boyfriend's tall ♪
1926
01:26:59,605 --> 01:27:01,868
♪ And he plays ball, so how
am I gonna compete with that? ♪
1927
01:27:01,868 --> 01:27:03,870
♪ 'Cause when it comes
to playing basketball ♪
1928
01:27:03,870 --> 01:27:05,872
♪ I'm always last to be picked
and in some cases ♪
1929
01:27:05,872 --> 01:27:08,005
♪ Never picked at all,
so I just lean up on the wall ♪
1930
01:27:08,005 --> 01:27:10,399
♪ Or sit up in the bleachers
with the rest of the girls ♪
1931
01:27:10,399 --> 01:27:12,052
♪ Who came
to watch their man ball ♪
1932
01:27:12,052 --> 01:27:15,012
♪ I confess it's a shame
when you livin' in a city ♪
1933
01:27:15,012 --> 01:27:17,275
♪ That's the size of a box
and nobody knows yo' name ♪
1934
01:27:17,275 --> 01:27:18,972
♪ Glad I came, to my senses
1935
01:27:18,972 --> 01:27:20,887
♪ Like quick-quick,
got sick-sick to my stomach ♪
1936
01:27:20,887 --> 01:27:23,890
♪ Overcometh by thoughts
of me and her together, right? ♪
1937
01:27:23,890 --> 01:27:25,892
♪ So when I asked her out,
she said I wasn't her type ♪
1938
01:27:25,892 --> 01:27:28,895
♪ I wish I was a little bit
taller, I wish I was a baller ♪
1939
01:27:28,895 --> 01:27:31,507
♪ I wish I had a girl who
looked good, I would call her ♪
1940
01:27:31,507 --> 01:27:33,683
♪ I wish I had a rabbit
in a hat with a bat ♪
1941
01:27:33,683 --> 01:27:35,641
♪ And a six-four Impala
1942
01:27:35,641 --> 01:27:39,297
♪ I wish I was a little bit
taller, I wish I was a baller ♪
1943
01:27:39,297 --> 01:27:41,517
♪ I wish I had a girl who
looked good, I would call her ♪
1944
01:27:41,517 --> 01:27:43,649
♪ I wish I had a rabbit
in a hat with a bat ♪
1945
01:27:43,649 --> 01:27:45,434
♪ And a six-four Impala
1946
01:27:46,957 --> 01:27:50,700
♪ I wish... I wish
1947
01:27:50,700 --> 01:27:52,876
♪ I wish
1948
01:27:54,138 --> 01:27:57,924
♪ I wish... I wish
1949
01:27:57,924 --> 01:28:00,013
♪ I wish.
137449
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