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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:28,071 --> 00:00:30,334 ♪ Oh, this is gonna be a groove for me ♪ 2 00:00:30,334 --> 00:00:32,075 ♪ It's gonna be a little something different ♪ 3 00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:33,337 ♪ But we gonna give it to 'em anyway ♪ 4 00:00:33,337 --> 00:00:35,513 ♪ Are you ready? Come on! Ha! ♪ 5 00:00:35,513 --> 00:00:37,820 ♪ We wanna give out a present to everybody this Christmas ♪ 6 00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,865 ♪ All around the world 7 00:00:39,865 --> 00:00:41,476 ♪ For every man, woman, boy and girl ♪ 8 00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:42,738 ♪ Are you ready right now? 9 00:00:42,738 --> 00:00:44,261 ♪ Come one, here we go 10 00:00:44,261 --> 00:00:45,784 ♪ Ah, I like it like that, come on ♪ 11 00:00:45,784 --> 00:00:48,178 ♪ That's it, all right, come on ♪ 12 00:00:48,178 --> 00:00:50,441 ♪ Oh-oh 13 00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:55,142 ♪ Christmas presents around the world ♪ 14 00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:57,666 ♪ Something mighty sweet to see ♪ 15 00:00:57,666 --> 00:01:01,365 ♪ If only if I just had 16 00:01:01,365 --> 00:01:03,411 ♪ A present for everyone 17 00:01:03,411 --> 00:01:07,284 ♪ Under one great big Christmas tree ♪ 18 00:01:07,284 --> 00:01:09,112 ♪ Every boy that wants a brand-new toy... ♪ 19 00:01:09,112 --> 00:01:11,114 Jacket. Jacket. Jacket. 20 00:01:11,114 --> 00:01:13,116 - Okay, see you later. 21 00:01:13,116 --> 00:01:15,684 ♪ For every Johnny that wants a car ♪ 22 00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:19,905 ♪ Every junior that wants a mobile bike ♪ 23 00:01:19,905 --> 00:01:22,212 ♪ That rides and rides and rides ♪ 24 00:01:23,605 --> 00:01:25,607 ♪ Now my little daughter 25 00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:27,739 ♪ She wants a doll that cries 26 00:01:27,739 --> 00:01:30,786 ♪ One that walks and wipes its eyes ♪ 27 00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:33,267 ♪ And I see there's someone... 28 00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:35,573 Flaxman's Auction House. 29 00:01:35,573 --> 00:01:37,227 How may I direct your call? 30 00:01:37,227 --> 00:01:39,882 ♪ Just to lean her head in their arms ♪ 31 00:01:41,579 --> 00:01:45,192 ♪ What a Christmas present, this Christmas ♪ 32 00:01:45,192 --> 00:01:48,630 ♪ Oh, what a gift you could be 33 00:01:48,630 --> 00:01:51,415 ♪ You know if I could just give out ♪ 34 00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:53,591 ♪ Christmas presents to everyone ♪ 35 00:01:53,591 --> 00:01:55,637 ♪ Under one great big Christmas tree... ♪ 36 00:01:55,637 --> 00:01:57,552 I mean, obviously, it's not the usual way of doing the pricing, 37 00:01:57,552 --> 00:01:59,902 but I figured if we give people 38 00:01:59,902 --> 00:02:01,773 a high percentage of the money we make, 39 00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:03,427 they'll be more likely to give us more things 40 00:02:03,427 --> 00:02:05,647 in the future, so... 41 00:02:05,647 --> 00:02:07,431 In the end, everyone wins. 42 00:02:07,431 --> 00:02:09,781 Have you told Flaxman? 43 00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:13,307 Uh, no. No, I just want to finish it first. 44 00:02:14,308 --> 00:02:18,964 ♪ Christmas presents around the world ♪ 45 00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:23,186 ♪ Something mighty sweet to see ♪ 46 00:02:23,186 --> 00:02:26,407 ♪ Only if I just had a present for everyone ♪ 47 00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:29,584 ♪ Under one great big Christmas tree ♪ 48 00:02:31,455 --> 00:02:35,807 ♪ Well, every boy that wants a brand-new toy ♪ 49 00:02:35,807 --> 00:02:39,376 ♪ For every Johnny that wants a car ♪ 50 00:02:39,376 --> 00:02:41,204 ♪ For every junior... 51 00:02:41,204 --> 00:02:43,685 - Ah, Mr. Flaxman. - Bernard. 52 00:02:43,685 --> 00:02:45,295 This is Henry Hackford 53 00:02:45,295 --> 00:02:47,602 of the Metropolitan Museum of Art. 54 00:02:47,602 --> 00:02:48,951 Uh, it's an honor to meet you, sir. 55 00:02:48,951 --> 00:02:50,518 Nice to meet you, too. 56 00:02:50,518 --> 00:02:52,607 I'd like you to take him through your new catalog. 57 00:02:52,607 --> 00:02:54,565 The Museum are potential purchasers 58 00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:56,480 of many of your treasures. 59 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:57,916 Yes, right. 60 00:02:57,916 --> 00:03:00,354 Um, I'm just kind of late for something. It's... 61 00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:03,748 Okay. Sure, sure. 62 00:03:03,748 --> 00:03:05,489 Oh, it'd be a pleasure, sir. 63 00:03:05,489 --> 00:03:06,795 Of course. Thank you. 64 00:03:06,795 --> 00:03:09,276 Thank you. 65 00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,713 Why are you carrying such an ugly bear? 66 00:03:15,891 --> 00:03:17,588 It's a particular focus on cartography 67 00:03:17,588 --> 00:03:19,242 and the natural world. 68 00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:22,506 I'm really proud of the breadth and... 69 00:03:22,506 --> 00:03:24,682 range of pieces we've got in this sale. 70 00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:27,424 Thank you. 71 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:35,911 Work ye, Bernard. Work ye. 72 00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:33,577 Hello, Bernard. 73 00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:35,971 Um, I-I'm so sorry. 74 00:04:35,971 --> 00:04:38,060 I-- Let-let me just explain everything. 75 00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:40,628 I already know what happened. 76 00:04:40,628 --> 00:04:42,847 It was, "Of course, Mr. Flaxman," 77 00:04:42,847 --> 00:04:45,067 and work, work, work. 78 00:04:45,067 --> 00:04:46,982 And you missed your daughter's birthday. 79 00:04:46,982 --> 00:04:48,418 I mean-- 80 00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:50,594 Uh, yes, t-that's pretty much it. 81 00:04:50,594 --> 00:04:53,118 Really, I'm so sorry, I ju-- 82 00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:55,991 Okay. Should I wake her up 83 00:04:55,991 --> 00:04:58,341 so you can give her your present? 84 00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:02,432 Yeah, uh, yeah. 85 00:05:02,432 --> 00:05:04,347 Yeah, yeah, of course, um... 86 00:05:04,347 --> 00:05:05,827 Uh, just give me one second. 87 00:05:05,827 --> 00:05:08,351 I just, uh, I just need to sort something. 88 00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:21,364 Oh. Hey. 89 00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:22,974 Hey. Hey, sweetheart. 90 00:05:22,974 --> 00:05:26,456 Happy birthday! 91 00:05:26,456 --> 00:05:27,849 Huh? Okay. Yep. 92 00:05:27,849 --> 00:05:31,896 Um, well, I... I got this for you. 93 00:05:32,897 --> 00:05:34,508 Groceries? 94 00:05:34,508 --> 00:05:36,640 No, no, uh, let me just help you with that. 95 00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:43,386 It's a jewelry box, golden jewelry box. 96 00:05:43,386 --> 00:05:44,866 Unbelievable, Bernie. 97 00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:48,522 I think it's stuck. 98 00:05:48,522 --> 00:05:51,133 Uh, oh, this is your first antique. 99 00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:52,482 Isn't it pretty? 100 00:05:52,482 --> 00:05:54,136 Sweetie, why don't, um... 101 00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:56,181 you go to your room and pack a bag for Grandma's, okay? 102 00:05:56,181 --> 00:05:57,705 Okay. 103 00:06:01,012 --> 00:06:04,451 Oh, Bernie. 104 00:06:04,451 --> 00:06:06,888 What are we gonna do? I, um... 105 00:06:06,888 --> 00:06:10,718 I think I'm gonna take Eve to my mom's like we planned, 106 00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:14,156 but, uh... I'm just gonna need some time there. 107 00:06:14,156 --> 00:06:17,028 At least through the holidays and... 108 00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:19,683 I-I think it's best if you don't come. 109 00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:22,686 What? 110 00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:24,601 Julie, no-- please, y-you're kidding. 111 00:06:24,601 --> 00:06:25,733 Please be kidding. 112 00:06:25,733 --> 00:06:27,865 No, Bernie, I am so not kidding. 113 00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:30,999 This is the least funny conversation of my life. 114 00:06:30,999 --> 00:06:33,784 It's been going on for such a long time. 115 00:06:33,784 --> 00:06:35,046 It's like... 116 00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:37,005 It's like you've forgotten who we are. 117 00:06:37,005 --> 00:06:38,615 And what a family means. And I-- 118 00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:41,139 I'm really sorry about the box. 119 00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:44,621 What she really wanted for her birthday was a dollhouse. 120 00:06:44,621 --> 00:06:47,668 Though I'm sure an hour of her dad's undivided attention 121 00:06:47,668 --> 00:06:49,452 would've been just as good. 122 00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:53,500 Bernie, it is one thing to drop the ball with me, 123 00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:54,849 but with Eve? 124 00:07:00,158 --> 00:07:02,030 I'll be back, okay? 125 00:07:03,901 --> 00:07:05,555 You missed my birthday. 126 00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:08,123 Oh, I'm-- I'm so sorry, sweetheart. 127 00:07:08,123 --> 00:07:11,256 Mom says you're a selfish bastard. 128 00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:13,824 S-She was joking. 129 00:07:15,217 --> 00:07:16,958 Well, d-darling... 130 00:07:16,958 --> 00:07:20,788 ♪ Bells will be ringing 131 00:07:20,788 --> 00:07:23,878 ♪ The glad, glad news 132 00:07:23,878 --> 00:07:27,795 ♪ Oh, what a Christmas 133 00:07:28,796 --> 00:07:31,886 ♪ To have the blues 134 00:07:33,627 --> 00:07:35,890 ♪ My baby's gone 135 00:07:35,890 --> 00:07:37,935 - ♪ I have no friends 136 00:07:37,935 --> 00:07:40,111 Come in. 137 00:07:40,111 --> 00:07:42,766 ♪ Please come home for Christmas... ♪ 138 00:07:42,766 --> 00:07:46,204 Bernard. Sit ye. Sit ye. 139 00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:48,032 ♪ Once again. 140 00:07:48,032 --> 00:07:51,601 Thank you for taking me through the catalog last night. 141 00:07:51,601 --> 00:07:54,256 It was very eye-opening. 142 00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:55,953 Well, I'm glad it was for you, sir. 143 00:07:55,953 --> 00:07:57,738 I have to say, it was a complete disaster for me. 144 00:07:57,738 --> 00:07:59,566 Oh, dear. 145 00:07:59,566 --> 00:08:01,655 By the time I got home yesterday, 146 00:08:01,655 --> 00:08:03,831 I'd missed my daughter's birthday. 147 00:08:03,831 --> 00:08:06,050 And then, my wife, 148 00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:09,532 uh, she decided that she was gonna... 149 00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:13,667 well, sort of move out for a bit. 150 00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:15,320 That's terrible. 151 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:19,499 I need to find a way right now t-to make things right. 152 00:08:20,369 --> 00:08:22,545 What I'm trying to say is I-I'm gonna need 153 00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,895 more than just the holidays off. 154 00:08:24,895 --> 00:08:27,028 I'm gonna need a few more weeks 155 00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:28,638 to fight for my marriage. 156 00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:29,987 Mm. 157 00:08:29,987 --> 00:08:31,554 Yes, of course you are. 158 00:08:31,554 --> 00:08:32,686 Oh. 159 00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:33,991 Really? Oh, thank you, sir. 160 00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:36,167 Will that be enough, though? 161 00:08:36,167 --> 00:08:38,561 I-I honestly don't know, sir. I hope so. 162 00:08:38,561 --> 00:08:40,824 And what if we take it one step further? 163 00:08:40,824 --> 00:08:43,000 What if we extend this sabbatical 164 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,177 to say, I don't know, 12 months? 165 00:08:46,177 --> 00:08:48,963 And after that, another 12 months. 166 00:08:48,963 --> 00:08:50,878 And then another 12 months. 167 00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:55,012 Are you-- are you suggesting I take three years off? 168 00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:57,101 Five years. Ten years! 169 00:08:57,101 --> 00:08:58,929 Let's go nuts! 170 00:08:58,929 --> 00:09:01,323 All right. It sort of sounds like you're firing me, sir. 171 00:09:01,323 --> 00:09:04,195 Yes, I suppose I am. 172 00:09:05,762 --> 00:09:07,677 You're a very evil person, sir. 173 00:09:07,677 --> 00:09:10,811 Or a very clever businessman. 174 00:09:10,811 --> 00:09:13,857 And you'll have years to decide which. 175 00:09:34,661 --> 00:09:36,097 Bernie. 176 00:09:36,097 --> 00:09:37,359 Hey, Lenny. 177 00:09:37,359 --> 00:09:38,882 What do you think? 178 00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:40,057 They let me spruce the place up a bit. 179 00:09:40,057 --> 00:09:42,016 Seasonal. Everyone's included. 180 00:09:42,016 --> 00:09:43,974 Yeah, it's very nice. 181 00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:45,976 How you doing, man? 182 00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:48,675 Very badly. 183 00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:50,807 I can tell by looking at you. 184 00:09:50,807 --> 00:09:52,069 It's making me sad. 185 00:09:52,069 --> 00:09:53,984 Okay, well, sorry to be a downer. 186 00:09:53,984 --> 00:09:55,943 No, no, you want to talk? You want me to get another chair? 187 00:09:55,943 --> 00:09:58,075 You want to-- I g-- I'm reading this great book. 188 00:09:58,075 --> 00:09:59,381 This might be helpful. 189 00:09:59,381 --> 00:10:01,209 It's a book about parallel universes. 190 00:10:01,209 --> 00:10:02,863 You know about this? 191 00:10:02,863 --> 00:10:06,736 There might be another you in another universe, 192 00:10:06,736 --> 00:10:08,738 having a great life right now. 193 00:10:08,738 --> 00:10:11,175 Maybe think about that. That's uplifting. 194 00:10:11,175 --> 00:10:12,742 Is it not? 195 00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,091 Do you-- What are you doing for Christmas? 196 00:10:14,091 --> 00:10:15,440 You want to come over? 197 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:17,312 You can hang out with the cats. It's fun. 198 00:10:17,312 --> 00:10:20,141 You watch them, they fight. There's one that lives outside. 199 00:10:20,141 --> 00:10:22,317 Y-You're very kind, but... 200 00:11:38,393 --> 00:11:41,135 Oh, my God! 201 00:11:41,135 --> 00:11:43,180 You'd think I'd get used to it, 202 00:11:43,180 --> 00:11:44,747 but I never do. 203 00:11:46,183 --> 00:11:49,056 Okay, no, no, no, you stay back, just stay back. 204 00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,535 I-I don't want to hurt you, 205 00:11:50,535 --> 00:11:52,276 but I will hurt you 206 00:11:52,276 --> 00:11:54,888 if you-- if you don't get out of here. 207 00:11:54,888 --> 00:11:56,367 No, no, no. 208 00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:58,152 H-Help! 209 00:11:58,152 --> 00:12:00,284 Oh, no. It's fine. What do you want? What do you want? 210 00:12:00,284 --> 00:12:01,764 Seriously, you can take everything. 211 00:12:01,764 --> 00:12:03,897 Oh, you're just wailing and crying 212 00:12:03,897 --> 00:12:05,376 like a little baby goat. 213 00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:07,378 - Uh, I don't know what you're-- 214 00:12:07,378 --> 00:12:09,337 I-I don't-- I wish-- I wish I understood what you're saying. 215 00:12:19,782 --> 00:12:21,349 Is this better? 216 00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:23,960 Is it-- Yeah, I mean, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 217 00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:27,572 Okay. Then let's get to it. 218 00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:30,184 Your wish is my command. 219 00:12:30,184 --> 00:12:32,403 Yeah, okay, yeah, no. 220 00:12:32,403 --> 00:12:34,101 That's funny 'cause of the-- 221 00:12:34,101 --> 00:12:35,450 I wish you'd stop trying to kill me. 222 00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:37,800 Oh, this? No, this is-- 223 00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,802 That's just force of habit. 224 00:12:39,802 --> 00:12:41,891 Who are you? How'd you get into my house? 225 00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:43,893 Oh, wh-- 226 00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:45,852 I was in the box. 227 00:12:45,852 --> 00:12:47,331 O-Okay, sure. 228 00:12:47,331 --> 00:12:49,159 Listen, uh, look, I-I don't judge you, 229 00:12:49,159 --> 00:12:51,074 or whatever recreational prescription drug 230 00:12:51,074 --> 00:12:52,989 of choice you've taken. 231 00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:55,818 Just don't touch that. I-I need you to get out of my house. 232 00:12:55,818 --> 00:12:59,169 Okay? Seriously, how did you get in? 233 00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:02,390 Okay, I'm going to talk slower for you. 234 00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:04,479 That box... 235 00:13:04,479 --> 00:13:07,221 that you were rubbing... 236 00:13:07,221 --> 00:13:10,006 I was in it. 237 00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:11,834 Okay, sure. 238 00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:13,270 Sure, and how-- and how do you 239 00:13:13,270 --> 00:13:16,056 get inside a box that's nine inches wide? 240 00:13:16,056 --> 00:13:18,841 Really good question. It's a really simple answer. 241 00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:21,409 You know, classic setup. 242 00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,153 Angry sorcerer. 243 00:13:30,940 --> 00:13:32,333 You know, crazy eyes. 244 00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:34,204 - Pointed a finger at me. 245 00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:36,467 Puff of smoke. Spinning and turning trough time and space. 246 00:13:39,557 --> 00:13:41,516 The next thing I know, 247 00:13:41,516 --> 00:13:44,040 I'm inside this stupid box. 248 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,346 Okay, wow, wow. 249 00:13:45,346 --> 00:13:46,869 I know! 250 00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,305 Now, that's a strong move. 251 00:13:48,305 --> 00:13:50,264 The "I'm a genie" home invasion excuse, that's-- 252 00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:51,874 It's not an excuse. 253 00:13:51,874 --> 00:13:53,136 I am a genie. 254 00:13:53,136 --> 00:13:54,877 Right, yeah. 255 00:13:54,877 --> 00:13:55,965 - Right, right, right. - Mm-hmm. 256 00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:56,966 Damn. 257 00:13:56,966 --> 00:13:58,446 I mean, the whole thing is-- 258 00:13:58,446 --> 00:14:00,535 No, no, no, you-you... 259 00:14:00,535 --> 00:14:02,972 - Back off. - Okay. All right. 260 00:14:02,972 --> 00:14:04,408 Let's just... 261 00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:07,977 You make wishes, and then I make them come true. 262 00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:10,632 That's how this whole thing works. 263 00:14:10,632 --> 00:14:12,939 Okay, so you're saying you're an actual genie. 264 00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:15,942 - Correct. We're like ghosts. - Sure. 265 00:14:15,942 --> 00:14:19,336 Or-or dragons or unicorns. 266 00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:20,685 You know, it's like you-you think we don't exist, 267 00:14:20,685 --> 00:14:22,383 and then you bump into one and you're like, 268 00:14:22,383 --> 00:14:24,167 "Oh, hey. Oh, look at that. A genie, genie, genie. 269 00:14:24,167 --> 00:14:25,212 Genies everywhere." 270 00:14:25,212 --> 00:14:26,517 Okay, well, you better get 271 00:14:26,517 --> 00:14:28,693 your next alibi ready pretty quick. 272 00:14:28,693 --> 00:14:30,565 Okay, how about this? Um, I-I wish... 273 00:14:30,565 --> 00:14:31,653 Bring it. 274 00:14:31,653 --> 00:14:33,350 ...that my phone wasn't dead. 275 00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:36,005 A-And, oh, I know. How about a camel? 276 00:14:36,005 --> 00:14:37,398 I wish I had my very own camel. 277 00:14:37,398 --> 00:14:39,008 Huh? That seems reasonable, right? 278 00:14:39,008 --> 00:14:40,357 Sure thing, boss. 279 00:14:40,357 --> 00:14:43,012 It's whatever floats your boat. 280 00:14:45,406 --> 00:14:47,364 Okay, uh... 281 00:14:47,364 --> 00:14:49,366 I mean, that's a coincidence. The... 282 00:14:49,366 --> 00:14:50,628 Hmm. 283 00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:52,195 Is that a coincidence? 284 00:14:57,461 --> 00:15:00,116 Okay, I-I-I take back the camel wish. I take it back. 285 00:15:00,116 --> 00:15:02,379 Everybody always takes the camel wish back. 286 00:15:04,512 --> 00:15:06,209 Oh, my God. 287 00:15:06,209 --> 00:15:10,039 T-That is interesting, though. The... 288 00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:18,221 I just don't want Eve growing up with a dad 289 00:15:18,221 --> 00:15:19,962 who never seems to put her first. 290 00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:22,051 I had to push back at some point. 291 00:15:22,051 --> 00:15:24,227 - That's right. 292 00:15:24,227 --> 00:15:26,534 God, the problem with Bernard is... 293 00:15:27,535 --> 00:15:29,624 And you know I still love him. 294 00:15:29,624 --> 00:15:32,453 But the problem is that he thinks everything 295 00:15:32,453 --> 00:15:34,150 will just be okay in the end. 296 00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:35,456 Hmm. 297 00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,461 He is my guy, 298 00:15:40,461 --> 00:15:42,419 but... 299 00:15:42,419 --> 00:15:44,987 he just won't live in the real world. 300 00:15:47,076 --> 00:15:48,773 Wow. This is so cool. 301 00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:50,645 Oh, my grandma always used to say, 302 00:15:50,645 --> 00:15:52,168 "You don't get nothing for free." 303 00:15:52,168 --> 00:15:53,517 I wish she could see me now. 304 00:15:53,517 --> 00:15:55,302 Hello, Bernard. 305 00:15:56,607 --> 00:16:00,089 Oh, look at you. You're as thin as a rake. 306 00:16:00,089 --> 00:16:02,178 Okay, on second thought, no hard feelings, Grandma, 307 00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:03,310 I wish she couldn't. 308 00:16:03,310 --> 00:16:05,094 Got it. 309 00:16:05,094 --> 00:16:07,270 I-I did not like that. 310 00:16:07,270 --> 00:16:09,185 - Okay, so wait, am I... 311 00:16:09,185 --> 00:16:11,666 Have I blown it already? Am I already out of wishes? 312 00:16:11,666 --> 00:16:14,103 No, keep at it. 313 00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:15,365 What about the whole three wishes thing? 314 00:16:15,365 --> 00:16:17,280 Fairytale stuff. 315 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:20,588 Real genies, unlimited wishes. 316 00:16:20,588 --> 00:16:22,111 Wow, we have to be very careful, don't we? 317 00:16:22,111 --> 00:16:24,548 Uh, you do. If you want my advice, 318 00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:27,464 I would say use the words "I wish" 319 00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:30,032 with the caution that you would usually reserve 320 00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:31,468 for "please castrate me." 321 00:16:31,468 --> 00:16:32,687 Just, you know. 322 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,432 Oh. 323 00:16:38,432 --> 00:16:40,129 What? 324 00:16:40,129 --> 00:16:42,088 - Problem? - What? N-No, no. Me? No problem. 325 00:16:42,088 --> 00:16:43,611 No, blow away. 326 00:16:43,611 --> 00:16:45,787 I-I just suppose a lot of things have changed 327 00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:47,223 since you were last out. 328 00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:49,051 - Always do. - Oh. 329 00:16:49,051 --> 00:16:50,444 It's different every single time. 330 00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:52,228 Wow, so you've been out of the box before? 331 00:16:52,228 --> 00:16:54,404 Oh, yeah. I mean, here and there, yeah. But, I mean... 332 00:16:54,404 --> 00:16:56,493 I don't know, from the looks of this place, 333 00:16:56,493 --> 00:17:00,062 I'm thinking, this time, it's been a really long one. 334 00:17:00,062 --> 00:17:01,672 I mean, give or take a day or two, 335 00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:03,457 if-if-if my dating on the box is right... -Yeah. Okay. 336 00:17:03,457 --> 00:17:06,808 I'd-I'd say about... 2,000 years. 337 00:17:06,808 --> 00:17:08,331 2,000 years? 338 00:17:08,331 --> 00:17:10,507 - Yeah. Yeah. - Okay. 339 00:17:10,507 --> 00:17:13,162 That's new information to me. 340 00:17:13,162 --> 00:17:15,251 - Is it? - That's... Yeah. 341 00:17:15,251 --> 00:17:18,080 All right, well... 342 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:19,690 Let's just get to work. 343 00:17:19,690 --> 00:17:23,172 Just hit me. You know, tell me what you want. 344 00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:24,434 Is it girls? 345 00:17:24,434 --> 00:17:26,436 Gold? Golden girls? 346 00:17:26,436 --> 00:17:28,830 - Extra girls in gold, or what? - Yeah, no, no, 347 00:17:28,830 --> 00:17:30,397 - come on. That's... - Well, I mean, 348 00:17:30,397 --> 00:17:31,789 you don't have to be embarrassed. 349 00:17:31,789 --> 00:17:34,227 I know the score. You know? I make you rich, 350 00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:35,793 you go live in a palace, you get five wives, 351 00:17:35,793 --> 00:17:37,534 you start to get fat, then you get mad at me, 352 00:17:37,534 --> 00:17:39,493 - and you put me back in the box. - No, no. 353 00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:40,668 You've actually got me all wrong. 354 00:17:40,668 --> 00:17:43,236 Uh, money can't help me. It's... 355 00:17:43,236 --> 00:17:45,542 Uh... 356 00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:49,416 My wife and kid, they-they just left for her mum's 357 00:17:49,416 --> 00:17:51,853 and looks like it might be the start of a whole... 358 00:17:51,853 --> 00:17:54,160 a "trial separation" period. 359 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,639 What is-- What are we-- What is this? 360 00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:57,206 - What are we doing? - Oh, no, nothing. 361 00:17:57,206 --> 00:17:58,816 And, uh, then my boss went and fired me. 362 00:17:58,816 --> 00:18:00,731 Wow, that is "tough." 363 00:18:00,731 --> 00:18:02,255 Yeah, that's not really how it w-works. 364 00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:03,560 Okay, well, I like it, 365 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,214 and I've been in a box for 2,000 years, 366 00:18:05,214 --> 00:18:06,911 so I'm just gonna keep that one. 367 00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:08,913 - Sure, okay. - So, about your 368 00:18:08,913 --> 00:18:11,655 sleazeball "boss," um, 369 00:18:11,655 --> 00:18:13,135 do you want me to kill him? 370 00:18:13,135 --> 00:18:15,529 I'm kind of a sword and slice gal. 371 00:18:15,529 --> 00:18:18,140 I just get in... get it done. 372 00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:19,315 Um... 373 00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:20,925 I will go with no. 374 00:18:20,925 --> 00:18:22,362 - Oh. - I mean, thank you. 375 00:18:22,362 --> 00:18:24,581 Okay, that's too bad 'cause I'm... 376 00:18:24,581 --> 00:18:26,583 It's kind of like my specialty, 377 00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:28,672 - if you know what I mean. - Sure. 378 00:18:28,672 --> 00:18:30,848 Okay. Hit me with it. What do you want? 379 00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:33,851 My three big wishes would be to-to get my child 380 00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:35,940 to love me again, to get my wife to love me again, 381 00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:37,812 and for us all to be happy. 382 00:18:37,812 --> 00:18:40,597 Oh. Okay, uh, 383 00:18:40,597 --> 00:18:42,904 it doesn't work like that. 384 00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:46,168 Uh, wishes can't change people's feelings, 385 00:18:46,168 --> 00:18:47,778 but, yeah, that's 386 00:18:47,778 --> 00:18:50,607 just kind of one of the big rules. It's like a no. 387 00:18:50,607 --> 00:18:54,568 Okay, um... Right. 388 00:18:54,568 --> 00:18:56,178 - We've-- That's a problem. - Yeah. 389 00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:58,441 Can I just ask, time travel, can we do that? 390 00:18:58,441 --> 00:19:00,269 'Cause that could solve everything. 391 00:19:00,269 --> 00:19:02,315 Or is that not... 392 00:19:02,315 --> 00:19:04,317 That's a "no can do." 393 00:19:04,317 --> 00:19:06,319 No time travel. That's crucial. 394 00:19:06,319 --> 00:19:08,799 You would just destroy the history of the world. 395 00:19:08,799 --> 00:19:10,410 I don't know, maybe we can figure out 396 00:19:10,410 --> 00:19:14,196 some kind of plan that would "encourage 397 00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:17,199 your wife and child" 398 00:19:17,199 --> 00:19:20,202 to start to feel differently about you. Right? 399 00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:22,813 Yeah, good. Good. 400 00:19:22,813 --> 00:19:24,293 - You're right. - Yeah. 401 00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:25,990 - It's time for action. - O-Oh, great. 402 00:19:25,990 --> 00:19:27,775 - It's time for action. - Oh. 403 00:19:27,775 --> 00:19:29,864 - I like this. - I-I wi-- Oh, by the way, 404 00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:31,474 - my name's Bernard. - Oh, Bernard. 405 00:19:31,474 --> 00:19:33,824 - Yeah, Bernard Bottle. - Bernard. Oh, Bernard. 406 00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:36,479 Bernard. Bernard Bottle. 407 00:19:36,479 --> 00:19:38,568 Maybe you ever-- You ever just go by "Nardo"? 408 00:19:38,568 --> 00:19:40,004 Uh... uh, I don't 409 00:19:40,004 --> 00:19:42,398 - personally, no. - No? Okay, think about it. 410 00:19:42,398 --> 00:19:44,792 Uh, Flora Gwendolen Locheed, 411 00:19:44,792 --> 00:19:46,663 uh, Firepit McAllister. 412 00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:49,231 - Oh, beautiful name. - Yeah. Oh, well, thank you. 413 00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:50,276 So nice to meet you. 414 00:19:50,276 --> 00:19:51,668 It's so nice to meet you, too. 415 00:19:51,668 --> 00:19:53,583 - Yeah. Okay. - Yes. 416 00:19:53,583 --> 00:19:55,368 - That's good. Thank you. - Oh, is that good? Okay. 417 00:19:55,368 --> 00:19:57,021 - Oh, got it. And then it stops. - Thank you. Uh, yeah. 418 00:19:57,021 --> 00:19:58,022 - That's it. - Got it. 419 00:19:58,022 --> 00:20:00,764 But I-I wish... I wish 420 00:20:00,764 --> 00:20:03,376 we were at my mother-in-law's house. 421 00:20:03,376 --> 00:20:05,204 I can do that. 422 00:20:08,424 --> 00:20:09,991 - Okay. Yeah, that's-- 423 00:20:09,991 --> 00:20:11,471 - It's a bit of a doozy. - Yeah. 424 00:20:11,471 --> 00:20:12,689 All right, take a... 425 00:20:12,689 --> 00:20:13,777 - No, I'm good, I'm good. - Okay, okay. 426 00:20:13,777 --> 00:20:14,865 - I'm good. - All right. 427 00:20:14,865 --> 00:20:16,432 Oh, there she is. 428 00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:20,828 Okay, okay. What's the plan? What're we gonna do? 429 00:20:22,830 --> 00:20:25,311 I-I don't know. I'm winging it. Maybe this was a bad idea. 430 00:20:25,311 --> 00:20:27,530 - May-Maybe. - Was it? 431 00:20:27,530 --> 00:20:29,793 It's better to have a plan than not a plan. 432 00:20:29,793 --> 00:20:31,839 Okay, but you know what? We're here now. 433 00:20:31,839 --> 00:20:33,928 So, let-let's do something, okay? 434 00:20:33,928 --> 00:20:35,625 - Right? - Okay. 435 00:20:35,625 --> 00:20:36,844 We're going back to, you know, back in my day... 436 00:20:36,844 --> 00:20:38,454 - Right. - ...when a man or a woman 437 00:20:38,454 --> 00:20:39,934 was trying to woo, you know, someone, suitor, 438 00:20:39,934 --> 00:20:41,805 - whatever you want to call it... - Sure. 439 00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:44,765 Mating dance. You want to keep 440 00:20:44,765 --> 00:20:46,810 - this counterclockwise... - Okay. 441 00:20:46,810 --> 00:20:48,072 ...and this clockwise. 442 00:20:48,072 --> 00:20:49,726 Don't ever sync them up together. 443 00:20:49,726 --> 00:20:51,511 I don't know if I-I can do that. 444 00:20:51,511 --> 00:20:52,816 Is that...? 445 00:20:52,816 --> 00:20:53,991 - Okay. - Oh, God, no, she saw me. 446 00:20:53,991 --> 00:20:55,602 - She saw me. - It's good. 447 00:20:55,602 --> 00:20:56,907 - You can talk to her. - Ah. What am I gonna say? 448 00:20:56,907 --> 00:20:59,388 - Can't we just vanish? 449 00:20:59,388 --> 00:21:00,694 Bernard? 450 00:21:00,694 --> 00:21:02,348 W-What are you doing here? 451 00:21:02,348 --> 00:21:04,306 Hi. Um... 452 00:21:04,306 --> 00:21:06,917 I-- You know what? I-I-I was just passing through, 453 00:21:06,917 --> 00:21:08,615 and I thought I'd-I'd just check to see if 454 00:21:08,615 --> 00:21:10,399 - you got here okay. 455 00:21:10,399 --> 00:21:12,923 Who-who is this? 456 00:21:12,923 --> 00:21:15,404 - Flora. - Um... 457 00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:16,840 This is F-Flora, yes. 458 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:18,712 - She's-she's a-a friend... - Yup. 459 00:21:18,712 --> 00:21:20,017 ...from work. 460 00:21:20,017 --> 00:21:21,845 Yeah, it's nice to meet you, ma'am. 461 00:21:21,845 --> 00:21:23,978 Um, you know, we-- Uh... 462 00:21:23,978 --> 00:21:25,893 I do work with Nardo. 463 00:21:25,893 --> 00:21:28,417 You know, we go to the workplace together, 464 00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:30,550 and we-we do work things in our, 465 00:21:30,550 --> 00:21:32,073 in our work location. 466 00:21:32,073 --> 00:21:33,509 You know what the funny thing-- 467 00:21:33,509 --> 00:21:35,598 The reason why you look so awesome is-- 468 00:21:35,598 --> 00:21:38,079 You just went to a Renaissance fair, didn't you? 469 00:21:38,079 --> 00:21:39,602 Didn't you? 470 00:21:39,602 --> 00:21:40,777 - Didn't I? - Yeah. 471 00:21:40,777 --> 00:21:42,431 Oh, yeah. 472 00:21:42,431 --> 00:21:45,956 Look, Bernard, I don't know... what you're up to, 473 00:21:45,956 --> 00:21:48,872 but I-I think you should go home. 474 00:21:48,872 --> 00:21:51,832 - Too much. Too weird. Get-- - Yeah. 475 00:21:51,832 --> 00:21:53,442 Go sleep it off. 476 00:21:53,442 --> 00:21:54,965 So nice meeting you. 477 00:21:54,965 --> 00:21:57,446 It's-- Uh, I-I like your sweater. 478 00:21:58,926 --> 00:22:02,538 I think that went well. 479 00:22:03,887 --> 00:22:05,759 I wish we were back at my place. 480 00:22:11,112 --> 00:22:12,635 Think, Nardo. 481 00:22:12,635 --> 00:22:14,637 What is the way to get to a woman's heart? 482 00:22:14,637 --> 00:22:18,641 Uh, love, kindness, consideration, 483 00:22:18,641 --> 00:22:19,947 offering to do the washing up... 484 00:22:19,947 --> 00:22:21,470 Okay. A-All of that's lovely, 485 00:22:21,470 --> 00:22:23,777 but, also, 486 00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:27,476 a massive sack full of gifts is really good, too. 487 00:22:27,476 --> 00:22:30,392 Okay. We can crack this. 488 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:32,742 Uh, are there any markets near here? 489 00:22:32,742 --> 00:22:35,005 Yeah. I mean, sure, a few. 490 00:22:35,005 --> 00:22:37,051 I mean, this town's pretty famous for its shopping. 491 00:22:37,051 --> 00:22:38,661 Oh, we're in a town? 492 00:22:38,661 --> 00:22:40,620 Yeah, quite a big one. New York. 493 00:22:40,620 --> 00:22:42,709 Oh, a new town. Well, la-di-da-di. 494 00:22:42,709 --> 00:22:44,145 But, um, for now, why don't we get some food? 495 00:22:44,145 --> 00:22:46,060 You must be pretty hungry 496 00:22:46,060 --> 00:22:47,801 after a couple of thousand years in a small box. 497 00:22:47,801 --> 00:22:49,803 Uh, you can say that again. 498 00:22:49,803 --> 00:22:52,458 Well, uh, uh, I wish we had 499 00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:55,678 a large pizza from John's on Bleecker, 500 00:22:55,678 --> 00:22:58,551 extra pepperoni, extra cheese. 501 00:23:00,553 --> 00:23:01,945 Ooh! 502 00:23:01,945 --> 00:23:03,077 Hmm. 503 00:23:04,078 --> 00:23:05,122 Ta-da. Huh. 504 00:23:05,122 --> 00:23:06,950 Hmm. 505 00:23:06,950 --> 00:23:09,039 I mean, I-I don't want to hurt your feelings, but, um, 506 00:23:09,039 --> 00:23:10,693 it just seems like things 507 00:23:10,693 --> 00:23:12,565 maybe were a little bit better back in my day. 508 00:23:12,565 --> 00:23:14,871 We would wolf down, like, a whole fresh deer, 509 00:23:14,871 --> 00:23:16,699 or snatch a salmon right out of the stream 510 00:23:16,699 --> 00:23:18,222 with our bare hands and just, ah. 511 00:23:18,222 --> 00:23:19,833 You know, this is, what? 512 00:23:19,833 --> 00:23:21,182 Okay. 513 00:23:21,182 --> 00:23:24,054 This is just a triangle of red bread. 514 00:23:24,054 --> 00:23:25,795 Well, yeah, I-I mean, I get what you're saying, 515 00:23:25,795 --> 00:23:27,101 but why don't you just give it a try? 516 00:23:27,101 --> 00:23:29,016 - Really? - Yeah, give it a go. 517 00:23:32,933 --> 00:23:34,935 - Mmm. - Huh? 518 00:23:34,935 --> 00:23:37,503 - Wait a minute. - Yeah? 519 00:23:37,503 --> 00:23:40,941 Wait an ever-loving minute! 520 00:23:42,072 --> 00:23:43,726 This is heaven. 521 00:23:43,726 --> 00:23:45,815 See? Some new things are pretty cool. 522 00:23:45,815 --> 00:23:47,774 Uh, uh, this. 523 00:23:47,774 --> 00:23:49,819 - This is gonna blow your mind. - Okay. 524 00:23:49,819 --> 00:23:51,125 Whoa. Uh, that's not what I meant. 525 00:23:51,125 --> 00:23:52,039 Eh, that's not really what it's for. 526 00:23:52,039 --> 00:23:53,040 It's not as good. 527 00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:54,563 Really? Um, no. 528 00:23:54,563 --> 00:23:56,173 Just, uh, pick a song. Hit something. 529 00:23:56,173 --> 00:23:58,480 That's not what I meant. 530 00:23:58,480 --> 00:23:59,742 Maybe a bit more gentle. 531 00:23:59,742 --> 00:24:01,744 Oh. What is it? Oh, "Spotifee." 532 00:24:01,744 --> 00:24:03,572 We call it Spotify. Okay, just one. 533 00:24:03,572 --> 00:24:05,008 Gentle, gentle, gentle. 534 00:24:05,008 --> 00:24:06,096 - One line. Yeah. - Oh, just one. 535 00:24:13,321 --> 00:24:14,844 Something wrong? 536 00:24:14,844 --> 00:24:17,891 No, something is incredibly right. 537 00:24:17,891 --> 00:24:21,111 My-my ears were made to hear this music. 538 00:24:21,111 --> 00:24:24,288 I mean... my wh-- my whole soul 539 00:24:24,288 --> 00:24:25,899 is... [stammers] soaring. 540 00:24:25,899 --> 00:24:27,683 Like a, like a flock of flamingos. 541 00:24:27,683 --> 00:24:30,904 This new music is incredible. 542 00:24:30,904 --> 00:24:34,516 Yeah, actually, the music isn't particularly new. 543 00:24:34,516 --> 00:24:35,604 It's actually pretty old. 544 00:24:35,604 --> 00:24:37,214 Why don't you try again? 545 00:24:38,999 --> 00:24:41,044 ♪ Collipark, Bubba Sparxxx 546 00:24:41,044 --> 00:24:42,132 ♪ Booty, booty, booty, booty... ♪ 547 00:24:43,307 --> 00:24:44,700 ♪ Booty, booty, booty, booty 548 00:24:44,700 --> 00:24:46,572 ♪ Rockin' everywhere 549 00:24:46,572 --> 00:24:48,225 ♪ Booty, booty, booty, booty, rockin' everywhere... ♪ 550 00:24:48,225 --> 00:24:50,880 Hey, hey. 551 00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:54,014 Oh, yeah! This is even better. 552 00:24:54,014 --> 00:24:56,930 Whoo! 553 00:24:56,930 --> 00:24:58,540 ♪ For 'bout a month or two 554 00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:00,107 ♪ Put a tan on it then see 555 00:25:00,107 --> 00:25:02,588 ♪ What it do, I found you, Ms. New Booty... ♪ 556 00:25:02,588 --> 00:25:03,980 Hey, can you, can you not, please? 557 00:25:03,980 --> 00:25:04,981 Hmm, no? 558 00:25:07,549 --> 00:25:09,029 ♪ For 'bout a month or two 559 00:25:09,029 --> 00:25:10,987 ♪ Put a tan on it, then see what it do ♪ 560 00:25:10,987 --> 00:25:13,076 ♪ Get it ripe, get it right, hit it tight. ♪ 561 00:25:13,076 --> 00:25:15,296 God, he must be so lonely already. 562 00:25:15,296 --> 00:25:16,993 Don't panic. 563 00:25:16,993 --> 00:25:19,561 Look, silence and solitude will make him realize 564 00:25:19,561 --> 00:25:21,345 what's really important in this life. 565 00:25:28,614 --> 00:25:30,311 - Oh! Ah! - Man, I don't think 566 00:25:30,311 --> 00:25:32,313 you get how good this music is. 567 00:25:32,313 --> 00:25:33,880 I mean, back in my day, it was all, like, 568 00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:35,882 bagpipes and hollowed out gourds. 569 00:25:35,882 --> 00:25:37,361 Yeah, sure, sure. Maybe we could 570 00:25:37,361 --> 00:25:38,841 continue this conversation in the other room? 571 00:25:38,841 --> 00:25:41,104 - You got it, Nardo. Great chair. - Great. 572 00:25:41,104 --> 00:25:44,760 Okay, sure. Do you want to close... the door? 573 00:25:51,071 --> 00:25:53,856 I mean, wowzers! 574 00:25:53,856 --> 00:25:57,991 This place is big and tall and-and busy. 575 00:25:57,991 --> 00:26:00,036 - Yeah, it certainly is. - Whew. 576 00:26:00,036 --> 00:26:02,038 All right. Let's get to work. 577 00:26:02,038 --> 00:26:05,781 Yeah, um, just first, I just wonder, 578 00:26:05,781 --> 00:26:08,001 maybe, should we, should we do something about your clothes? 579 00:26:08,001 --> 00:26:09,698 - What? 580 00:26:09,698 --> 00:26:12,092 I mean, I can't get more stylish than this. 581 00:26:12,092 --> 00:26:13,354 I just thought maybe you might want to 582 00:26:13,354 --> 00:26:14,703 blend in a little better. 583 00:26:14,703 --> 00:26:16,618 Well, you got to do the thing. 584 00:26:16,618 --> 00:26:18,315 Oh, sorry. [chuckles] Uh, I... 585 00:26:18,315 --> 00:26:21,057 I wish you would blend in a bit better. 586 00:26:21,057 --> 00:26:23,930 All right. Uh, let's see. 587 00:26:25,105 --> 00:26:26,628 Who do I-- Ooh. 588 00:26:26,628 --> 00:26:27,977 Well, they're killing it. 589 00:26:27,977 --> 00:26:29,979 Uh... 590 00:26:29,979 --> 00:26:32,895 I mean, can you even see me? 591 00:26:32,895 --> 00:26:34,854 This is like, I'm blending. 592 00:26:34,854 --> 00:26:37,334 You know what? I would, I would keep going. 593 00:26:37,334 --> 00:26:39,380 Uh, okay. All right. 594 00:26:39,380 --> 00:26:41,338 Uh, no, no, no. Oh. 595 00:26:41,338 --> 00:26:43,602 She's perfection. 596 00:26:44,690 --> 00:26:46,213 I mean, this feels right. Right? 597 00:26:46,213 --> 00:26:47,214 Uh... 598 00:26:47,214 --> 00:26:49,216 You know, 599 00:26:49,216 --> 00:26:50,783 m-maybe third time's the charm? 600 00:26:50,783 --> 00:26:54,003 You're very picky, Nardo. Very picky. Okay. 601 00:26:54,003 --> 00:26:55,701 Uh, let's see. Uh... 602 00:26:55,701 --> 00:26:58,921 How about eeny, meeny, 603 00:26:58,921 --> 00:27:01,010 miny, both. 604 00:27:02,142 --> 00:27:04,927 I mean, now we're talking. Am I right? 605 00:27:04,927 --> 00:27:06,842 Yeah, uh... 606 00:27:06,842 --> 00:27:08,757 Yeah, I guess that-- It sort of works. 607 00:27:08,757 --> 00:27:11,020 Sort of works? I look fantastic. 608 00:27:11,020 --> 00:27:14,067 Come on. We got to get back on task. Let's shop. 609 00:27:17,331 --> 00:27:18,724 You know what? We can start here. 610 00:27:18,724 --> 00:27:19,942 Okay. 611 00:27:19,942 --> 00:27:21,335 - Welcome to Bloomingdale's. - Oh. 612 00:27:21,335 --> 00:27:22,684 - How you doing today? - Good. 613 00:27:22,684 --> 00:27:23,946 Enjoy your shopping. 614 00:27:23,946 --> 00:27:25,774 I wish we had an all-expenses-paid 615 00:27:25,774 --> 00:27:27,167 shopping spree. 616 00:27:27,167 --> 00:27:28,995 Oh. Okay. 617 00:27:28,995 --> 00:27:31,258 Ooh. 618 00:27:31,258 --> 00:27:33,869 Oh, this is amazing. 619 00:27:33,869 --> 00:27:35,958 I've never seen anything like it. 620 00:27:35,958 --> 00:27:38,134 Oh, wait, look. 621 00:27:38,134 --> 00:27:40,702 What do you call it? 622 00:27:40,702 --> 00:27:43,313 - Oh, sanitizer. - Sanitizer. 623 00:27:43,313 --> 00:27:45,098 Mmm, it's zesty. 624 00:27:45,098 --> 00:27:47,404 - No, it's... - Mmm. 625 00:27:48,928 --> 00:27:50,103 - No. - Oh. 626 00:27:50,103 --> 00:27:51,974 Nardo, look what I found. 627 00:27:51,974 --> 00:27:55,804 Huh? I don't know what it is, but it's really fun. 628 00:27:55,804 --> 00:27:58,720 I think Julie might love it. Look, and... 629 00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:01,157 Okay. Sorry. She's new in town. 630 00:28:02,332 --> 00:28:05,118 What is this? That's so pretty. 631 00:28:05,118 --> 00:28:07,424 - It's beautiful. 632 00:28:07,424 --> 00:28:10,863 Your presence is my present. 633 00:28:10,863 --> 00:28:12,429 Get it? 634 00:28:12,429 --> 00:28:14,736 - You need to stop. Wait, wait. 635 00:28:14,736 --> 00:28:15,737 Oh. 636 00:28:15,737 --> 00:28:18,000 It's hard to run in these. 637 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,002 Pretty good haul, huh? 638 00:28:20,002 --> 00:28:22,004 - You think so? - Yeah. 639 00:28:22,004 --> 00:28:24,485 I think Julie and Eve are gonna be pretty excited. 640 00:28:24,485 --> 00:28:26,356 Well, I hope they are. 641 00:28:26,356 --> 00:28:29,142 - Oh, my God. - What? What? 642 00:28:29,142 --> 00:28:31,361 I had just hoped that by now that this 643 00:28:31,361 --> 00:28:33,450 kind of torture had stopped. 644 00:28:33,450 --> 00:28:35,365 This is a gym. 645 00:28:35,365 --> 00:28:37,150 They-they actually pay to do these things. 646 00:28:37,150 --> 00:28:39,369 Yeah. Okay, good one. 647 00:28:39,369 --> 00:28:41,937 I will avenge thee! 648 00:28:41,937 --> 00:28:44,113 Okay, you need to stop that. Sorry. 649 00:28:44,113 --> 00:28:45,985 I will avenge thee! 650 00:28:45,985 --> 00:28:47,551 - Sorry. 651 00:28:47,551 --> 00:28:49,815 And what would you like for Christmas this year? 652 00:28:49,815 --> 00:28:51,207 Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute. 653 00:28:51,207 --> 00:28:52,382 Why-why are all these people standing in line 654 00:28:52,382 --> 00:28:54,080 to see Mr. Beardie? 655 00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:56,082 Ooh, is he like the king or an emperor or something? 656 00:28:56,082 --> 00:28:57,518 Uh, no, it's actually, 657 00:28:57,518 --> 00:28:58,998 it's just the whole Christmas thing. 658 00:28:58,998 --> 00:29:00,390 Basically, the guy with the beard, 659 00:29:00,390 --> 00:29:02,218 he flies around with a bunch of reindeer. 660 00:29:02,218 --> 00:29:04,177 - Okay. - Uh, he goes down the chimney 661 00:29:04,177 --> 00:29:06,832 and puts these presents in these huge stockings that 662 00:29:06,832 --> 00:29:08,268 kids hang along the fireplace. 663 00:29:08,268 --> 00:29:10,313 Kind of amazing 'cause you had a hard time 664 00:29:10,313 --> 00:29:13,229 believing in genies, but, uh, okay. 665 00:29:13,229 --> 00:29:16,058 I want a car and a rocket launcher. 666 00:29:16,058 --> 00:29:19,061 Here is your pencil. 667 00:29:19,061 --> 00:29:22,325 Christmas is also the time kids learn all about disappointment. 668 00:29:22,325 --> 00:29:24,284 Yeah, m... Ugh. 669 00:29:24,284 --> 00:29:26,025 - Here you go, sir. - Oh, thank you. 670 00:29:26,025 --> 00:29:27,287 Enjoy. 671 00:29:30,116 --> 00:29:31,465 Excuse me, Bernard. 672 00:29:31,465 --> 00:29:35,077 You, sir, are an artist. 673 00:29:35,077 --> 00:29:37,819 - Thank you. - Wow. 674 00:29:37,819 --> 00:29:40,604 - Thanks. All right. - Wow, wow, wow. 675 00:29:40,604 --> 00:29:44,217 Okay, so tell me about this whole Christmas thing of yours. 676 00:29:44,217 --> 00:29:48,221 Oh. Uh, well, it-it's become really commercial, 677 00:29:48,221 --> 00:29:50,397 but... originally, it was meant to celebrate 678 00:29:50,397 --> 00:29:53,139 the birth of this guy. He was, he was called Jesus Christ. 679 00:29:53,139 --> 00:29:56,229 Wait, what? Jesus? Are you talking about Mary's kid? 680 00:29:56,229 --> 00:29:57,839 Yeah. 681 00:29:57,839 --> 00:29:59,362 What? I knew him. 682 00:29:59,362 --> 00:30:01,408 What did he do to get so famous? 683 00:30:01,408 --> 00:30:03,845 You... [chuckles] Wow. Okay, uh, 684 00:30:03,845 --> 00:30:05,368 well, he turned out to be the Son of God. 685 00:30:05,368 --> 00:30:08,415 Oh, no, I thought he was kidding. 686 00:30:08,415 --> 00:30:10,591 Wait, what? You-you actually met him? 687 00:30:10,591 --> 00:30:13,159 Yeah. Oh, my-- yeah, last time I was out of the box. 688 00:30:13,159 --> 00:30:15,465 This is amazing, like... 689 00:30:15,465 --> 00:30:17,163 What? I mean, 690 00:30:17,163 --> 00:30:19,121 okay, what was, what was he like? 691 00:30:19,121 --> 00:30:20,906 What was Jesus like? 692 00:30:20,906 --> 00:30:23,038 You know, he's Jesus. He's just kind of like, "Hey." 693 00:30:23,038 --> 00:30:26,172 But financially under-ambitious, 694 00:30:26,172 --> 00:30:28,304 to tell you the truth. I mean, I did say to him once, 695 00:30:28,304 --> 00:30:30,306 I'm like, "With your talents, 696 00:30:30,306 --> 00:30:32,569 "I mean water, kaboom, into wine, 697 00:30:32,569 --> 00:30:35,311 conjuring fish out of thin air." 698 00:30:35,311 --> 00:30:37,487 I said, "Big J, we should open a restaurant together." 699 00:30:37,487 --> 00:30:39,098 You know, we could call it, like, "Something Fishy" 700 00:30:39,098 --> 00:30:40,664 or "Oh, My Cod." 701 00:30:40,664 --> 00:30:42,971 Goody Two-shoes didn't want anything to do with that. 702 00:30:42,971 --> 00:30:45,495 Hey, well, I mean, to Big J. 703 00:30:45,495 --> 00:30:47,106 - To Big J. - Hmm. 704 00:30:47,106 --> 00:30:48,977 Okay, how about this, how about this, um... 705 00:30:48,977 --> 00:30:52,981 Oh, I wish we could go back to Santa's Grotto. 706 00:30:52,981 --> 00:30:54,591 You got it. 707 00:30:58,552 --> 00:31:01,250 Hello. Merry Christmas. 708 00:31:01,250 --> 00:31:03,905 Okay, so, um, I wish that 709 00:31:03,905 --> 00:31:06,516 all these kids got everything they wanted. 710 00:31:06,516 --> 00:31:08,475 Ooh, he thinks he's gonna get a pencil. 711 00:31:08,475 --> 00:31:10,303 He is so not just gonna get a pencil. 712 00:31:10,303 --> 00:31:13,654 ♪ Oh, yeah, candles burnin' low ♪ 713 00:31:13,654 --> 00:31:17,005 - ♪ Lots of mistletoe - There you go. 714 00:31:17,005 --> 00:31:19,965 Merry Christmas! - ♪ Choirs singin' carols 715 00:31:19,965 --> 00:31:22,315 - ♪ Right outside my door 716 00:31:22,315 --> 00:31:25,361 ♪ All these things and more... 717 00:31:25,361 --> 00:31:28,538 Whoo! Ride him! There you go. 718 00:31:28,538 --> 00:31:31,411 Her parents are around somewhere, right? 719 00:31:32,412 --> 00:31:35,371 Uh, what is all of this? 720 00:31:35,371 --> 00:31:37,591 Uh, it's how all these different companies 721 00:31:37,591 --> 00:31:39,680 get you to buy their thing. 722 00:31:41,334 --> 00:31:44,554 Well, how about we do something about that, Nardo? 723 00:31:44,554 --> 00:31:45,947 Get wishing. 724 00:31:45,947 --> 00:31:48,994 ♪ I see your smilin' face 725 00:31:48,994 --> 00:31:51,474 ♪ Like I've never seen before 726 00:31:51,474 --> 00:31:55,261 ♪ Even though I love you madly 727 00:31:55,261 --> 00:31:57,437 ♪ It seems I love you more 728 00:31:57,437 --> 00:31:59,526 ♪ All these things and more... 729 00:31:59,526 --> 00:32:01,441 Hey, should we change that sign, too? 730 00:32:01,441 --> 00:32:03,399 Uh, no, that's actually, um, a cinema. 731 00:32:03,399 --> 00:32:06,141 Wait, do you want to see a movie? -Yes. 732 00:32:06,141 --> 00:32:07,708 I have no idea what a movie is, but, uh, 733 00:32:07,708 --> 00:32:10,232 I would really like to see one, I think. 734 00:32:14,628 --> 00:32:16,717 Ooh, he's fast. 735 00:32:16,717 --> 00:32:18,980 - Yeah. - He's very, very fast. 736 00:32:21,287 --> 00:32:23,028 Don't do the jump. Don't do the jumping! 737 00:32:23,028 --> 00:32:25,639 No, no, no. This mission is impossible! 738 00:32:25,639 --> 00:32:28,294 - It's in the title! 739 00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,777 What is the name of that hero guy? 740 00:32:33,777 --> 00:32:36,215 - Oh, uh, Tom Cruise. - Tom Cruise. 741 00:32:36,215 --> 00:32:38,260 - Yeah. - I mean, he's huge. 742 00:32:38,260 --> 00:32:40,393 He's the biggest human being I've ever seen. 743 00:32:40,393 --> 00:32:42,525 Where-where do giants like Tom Cruise live? 744 00:32:42,525 --> 00:32:45,180 - Uh, in Los Angeles mainly. - Los Angeles mainly. 745 00:32:45,180 --> 00:32:47,617 I mean, I'm never going there, because I think 746 00:32:47,617 --> 00:32:49,489 he would take that enormous foot 747 00:32:49,489 --> 00:32:51,491 and just crunch me with it. 748 00:32:51,491 --> 00:32:54,059 Or, I don't know, maybe I should go because 749 00:32:54,059 --> 00:32:57,149 what if he uses those enormous juicy lips to kiss me? 750 00:32:57,149 --> 00:32:59,194 I really wouldn't worry about it. I mean, Tom, 751 00:32:59,194 --> 00:33:00,674 Tom Cruise is definitely just normal size. 752 00:33:00,674 --> 00:33:03,372 Like, in fact, everything's normal sized. 753 00:33:03,372 --> 00:33:05,374 It's just the movies that make them look big. 754 00:33:05,374 --> 00:33:08,290 - Ah. 755 00:33:08,290 --> 00:33:09,726 That's fine. 756 00:33:09,726 --> 00:33:12,033 Ho, ho. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hi. 757 00:33:12,033 --> 00:33:14,209 Hi. I don't think we've been introduced. 758 00:33:14,209 --> 00:33:16,472 - I'm Lenny. - Oh. 759 00:33:16,472 --> 00:33:18,083 - Oh, yeah, this is, um-- - Flora. 760 00:33:18,083 --> 00:33:21,086 Pleasure, really. I mean, I-I love this. 761 00:33:21,086 --> 00:33:23,349 It's, uh... I love a man in a uniform. 762 00:33:23,349 --> 00:33:25,307 Thank you. 763 00:33:25,307 --> 00:33:26,526 - Uh, she's my... I-I got it. 764 00:33:26,526 --> 00:33:28,310 An old friend. You know, 765 00:33:28,310 --> 00:33:29,746 just in from out of town. 766 00:33:29,746 --> 00:33:31,792 Spending a few days just to help 767 00:33:31,792 --> 00:33:34,360 this one get out of the pickle he got himself into with Julie. 768 00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:36,405 Good, I'm glad someone's doing that, 769 00:33:36,405 --> 00:33:38,494 and I think it's working. I haven't seen him glowing 770 00:33:38,494 --> 00:33:40,409 like this in a, in a bit. 771 00:33:40,409 --> 00:33:42,498 Well... -You know, I try my best, but I don't think, 772 00:33:42,498 --> 00:33:44,457 uh, I don't-- I rarely glow. 773 00:33:44,457 --> 00:33:46,676 I think I-- I'm a little rough, little rough. -Oh. 774 00:33:46,676 --> 00:33:49,070 I mean, I-I like things rough around the edges. 775 00:33:50,593 --> 00:33:52,204 - Do you? - If you know what I mean? 776 00:33:52,204 --> 00:33:53,640 - You old green eyes-- - Mm-hmm. 777 00:33:53,640 --> 00:33:55,207 - Oh, hazel. - Hazel is right. 778 00:33:55,207 --> 00:33:56,773 And you get what I'm saying? 779 00:33:56,773 --> 00:33:58,558 Yeah, I think everyone gets what you're saying, so... 780 00:33:58,558 --> 00:34:01,169 - What's that? 781 00:34:01,169 --> 00:34:03,171 Uh, uh, yeah. 782 00:34:03,171 --> 00:34:04,781 I think he has to go to the bathroom. 783 00:34:04,781 --> 00:34:06,740 Uh... -LENNY: You have a key. Don't you have a key? 784 00:34:06,740 --> 00:34:08,350 I don't need to go. -FLORA: Do you have to go to the bathroom? 785 00:34:08,350 --> 00:34:09,743 Yeah, I do have-- Good seeing you, Lenny. Bye. 786 00:34:09,743 --> 00:34:11,527 Okay, Bernie. Flora? Di-- Do-- Have we met? 787 00:34:11,527 --> 00:34:13,181 Like, back in the day? Did we...? 788 00:34:13,181 --> 00:34:15,618 It would've been way back in the day. 789 00:34:15,618 --> 00:34:18,360 - Way, way back. - Key West. Key West? 790 00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:20,101 Maybe. 791 00:34:23,931 --> 00:34:25,759 We should go. 792 00:34:25,759 --> 00:34:27,761 I'm almost ready. 793 00:34:27,761 --> 00:34:29,850 Okay. 794 00:34:32,853 --> 00:34:35,073 - Ooh. That's nice. 795 00:34:36,422 --> 00:34:38,250 Refreshing. 796 00:34:41,557 --> 00:34:43,820 Let's do this. 797 00:34:43,820 --> 00:34:45,779 How'd you want to get there? 798 00:34:45,779 --> 00:34:48,216 Do you want one of those car things? -Yeah. 799 00:34:48,216 --> 00:34:49,478 Okay, what kind? 800 00:34:49,478 --> 00:34:51,567 Just something subtle, 801 00:34:51,567 --> 00:34:53,482 sensible. 802 00:34:58,966 --> 00:35:01,142 Do you think we've got enough presents? 803 00:35:01,142 --> 00:35:03,275 I-I think we would have had to have gotten 804 00:35:03,275 --> 00:35:04,798 a second car to get any more. 805 00:35:04,798 --> 00:35:06,452 Right, right? What about this little guy? 806 00:35:06,452 --> 00:35:08,541 All right, let's see what this thing can do. 807 00:35:08,541 --> 00:35:10,238 Okay. Okay, you ready? 808 00:35:10,238 --> 00:35:12,414 All right, let's get Julie and Eve back! 809 00:35:12,414 --> 00:35:15,156 ♪ Don't mess around with those silly toys... ♪ 810 00:35:15,156 --> 00:35:16,810 Are you sure I'm invisible? 811 00:35:16,810 --> 00:35:19,726 Yes, I'm sure. Can-can you stop switching sides, please? 812 00:35:21,423 --> 00:35:23,643 Oh, she's cute. 813 00:35:23,643 --> 00:35:25,688 She's definitely cute. 814 00:35:27,429 --> 00:35:29,431 How was the story today? 815 00:35:29,431 --> 00:35:30,911 - It was good. - Good? 816 00:35:30,911 --> 00:35:32,956 Wait, Dad? 817 00:35:32,956 --> 00:35:35,785 - Hey, how are you? - Good. 818 00:35:35,785 --> 00:35:38,527 - Hey. - Hey. 819 00:35:38,527 --> 00:35:40,181 How are you do--? Oh. 820 00:35:40,181 --> 00:35:41,443 I'm so sorry about the other night, you know? 821 00:35:41,443 --> 00:35:43,402 Yeah, very weird. 822 00:35:43,402 --> 00:35:44,751 What's up? 823 00:35:44,751 --> 00:35:46,796 Uh, I-I've just... 824 00:35:46,796 --> 00:35:49,973 I've been wanting you to know that I-I-I can be there. 825 00:35:49,973 --> 00:35:52,628 You know, even when I'm not meant to be there, so that, 826 00:35:52,628 --> 00:35:54,282 you know, when I am meant to be there, you know, 827 00:35:54,282 --> 00:35:55,936 I'll definitely be-- be there. 828 00:35:57,764 --> 00:35:59,896 I know this can't be easy. 829 00:35:59,896 --> 00:36:02,377 It's not easy for either of us. 830 00:36:02,377 --> 00:36:04,379 Um... 831 00:36:04,379 --> 00:36:06,207 Dad, do you want to get ice cream? 832 00:36:06,207 --> 00:36:08,905 Do I...? 833 00:36:08,905 --> 00:36:11,865 - Um... - Yeah. 834 00:36:11,865 --> 00:36:14,476 Yeah, yeah, why not? 835 00:36:14,476 --> 00:36:16,957 I wish the place had cherry. That's my favorite flavor. 836 00:36:16,957 --> 00:36:19,481 The-- You know what? I wis-- I wish that, too. 837 00:36:19,481 --> 00:36:22,528 - Uh, should we go? Yeah? - Yeah. Yeah. 838 00:36:25,052 --> 00:36:26,923 Hey, you don't happen to have cherry, do you? 839 00:36:26,923 --> 00:36:29,665 Yeah, actually, it just came in. 840 00:36:33,408 --> 00:36:35,454 Well, look, it's so good to see the two of you. 841 00:36:35,454 --> 00:36:37,020 Oh, and don't let me forget-- before I go, 842 00:36:37,020 --> 00:36:38,761 I've got-- I-I've got one or two things in the car 843 00:36:38,761 --> 00:36:40,763 that I'd really love to give you. 844 00:36:40,763 --> 00:36:42,461 Hey. 845 00:36:42,461 --> 00:36:44,376 - Sorry, we're late, guys. - Oh. 846 00:36:44,376 --> 00:36:47,248 Oh. Uh, Bernie, uh, you remember Johnny? 847 00:36:47,248 --> 00:36:49,424 We grew up together. This is his daughter Emma. 848 00:36:49,424 --> 00:36:51,426 Uh, they live next to my mom. I'm sorry. 849 00:36:51,426 --> 00:36:52,688 I should've mentioned that they were coming to meet us. 850 00:36:52,688 --> 00:36:53,863 No, no, it's good. 851 00:36:53,863 --> 00:36:55,648 - Yeah. - Nice to finally meet ya. 852 00:36:55,648 --> 00:36:57,040 Yeah. 853 00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:58,781 It's been so lucky having them next door. 854 00:36:58,781 --> 00:37:01,349 I mean, as you can see, the girls are two peas in a pod. 855 00:37:01,349 --> 00:37:02,350 - Great. 856 00:37:02,350 --> 00:37:03,873 Great. 857 00:37:03,873 --> 00:37:05,266 That's great. 858 00:37:07,747 --> 00:37:08,922 Who's ready to go see a movie? 859 00:37:08,922 --> 00:37:10,532 - We are! We are! We are! 860 00:37:10,532 --> 00:37:11,838 Okay, well, we should probably go 861 00:37:11,838 --> 00:37:13,448 - if we're gonna make it. Yeah. 862 00:37:13,448 --> 00:37:15,363 Can we do the stuff in the car another time? 863 00:37:15,363 --> 00:37:17,278 Sure. 864 00:37:17,278 --> 00:37:19,324 Yeah, sure. Sure, that's... fab. 865 00:37:19,324 --> 00:37:21,239 Okay. 866 00:37:22,544 --> 00:37:23,806 Okay. 867 00:37:23,806 --> 00:37:25,373 - Bye, Dad. - Yeah. 868 00:37:25,373 --> 00:37:26,766 I'll see you later, darling. 869 00:37:28,333 --> 00:37:30,291 - Have a good time, yeah? - Yeah. 870 00:37:31,553 --> 00:37:33,338 What if I bring Eve by on Saturday? 871 00:37:33,338 --> 00:37:34,600 For a night with you. 872 00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:35,905 I mean, uh... 873 00:37:35,905 --> 00:37:37,429 - Yeah, I would love that. - Yeah? 874 00:37:37,429 --> 00:37:38,734 Absolutely. Yeah. That's a... 875 00:37:38,734 --> 00:37:39,735 - great plan. - All right. 876 00:37:39,735 --> 00:37:40,997 Let's do it. 877 00:37:42,042 --> 00:37:43,739 Bye, Bernie. It was a pleasure, man. -Yeah. 878 00:37:43,739 --> 00:37:44,914 - Real pleasure. - Yeah. Nice to... 879 00:37:44,914 --> 00:37:46,394 nice to meet you... 880 00:37:46,394 --> 00:37:47,613 Johnny. 881 00:37:48,614 --> 00:37:49,876 Uh, hold up for me, guys. 882 00:37:51,704 --> 00:37:53,619 Dad, are you okay? [groans] Yeah! 883 00:37:53,619 --> 00:37:55,708 - Are you okay? - Yeah. Yeah. 884 00:37:55,708 --> 00:37:57,405 - Whew, I'm good. - Okay. 885 00:37:59,451 --> 00:38:02,062 No, I'm good. I'm good. 886 00:38:02,062 --> 00:38:04,760 Ah, it gets me every time. 887 00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:06,327 I can't believe it. 888 00:38:06,327 --> 00:38:08,721 How did I end up fifth-wheeling my own family? 889 00:38:08,721 --> 00:38:10,462 This is a disaster. 890 00:38:10,462 --> 00:38:13,073 Here's a question-- and there's no wrong answer-- but... 891 00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:16,772 would you maybe feel better if you would wish, 892 00:38:16,772 --> 00:38:18,774 you know, for Johnny to kinda... 893 00:38:18,774 --> 00:38:20,472 So easy to do it. 894 00:38:20,472 --> 00:38:23,692 It's actually easier to do it than not to do it. 895 00:38:23,692 --> 00:38:26,826 ♪ Without that girl of mine, oh! ♪ 896 00:38:26,826 --> 00:38:30,569 ♪ Christmas just ain't Christmas ♪ 897 00:38:30,569 --> 00:38:32,658 ♪ Without the one you love 898 00:38:32,658 --> 00:38:33,659 Hello, gorgeous. 899 00:38:33,659 --> 00:38:35,356 Hello, handsome. 900 00:38:35,356 --> 00:38:36,401 Do you think you and I could... 901 00:38:36,401 --> 00:38:37,489 Yep. 902 00:38:37,489 --> 00:38:39,142 Yeah? 903 00:38:39,142 --> 00:38:40,492 Hi, Bernie. 904 00:38:45,845 --> 00:38:47,629 So, Lenny's interesting. 905 00:38:47,629 --> 00:38:50,632 I mean, that's a face that has seen some fun, right? 906 00:38:50,632 --> 00:38:52,591 Yeah. Well, he's definitely single, 907 00:38:52,591 --> 00:38:54,636 I can tell you that much. 908 00:38:54,636 --> 00:38:56,769 I hope you like cats, 'cause he's got a fair few of them. 909 00:38:56,769 --> 00:38:58,727 Oh, I love cats. They're delicious. 910 00:39:00,512 --> 00:39:04,037 This Julie and Eve thing's not gonna be easy. 911 00:39:05,038 --> 00:39:07,475 Stop right there, buster. 912 00:39:07,475 --> 00:39:11,653 Okay, Rome was not, as you know, built in a day. 913 00:39:11,653 --> 00:39:12,828 It took 12. 914 00:39:12,828 --> 00:39:15,614 We have all night 915 00:39:15,614 --> 00:39:17,964 to just sit and come up with a plan, 916 00:39:17,964 --> 00:39:19,487 what's our next move. 917 00:39:19,487 --> 00:39:20,967 We've got this. 918 00:39:22,838 --> 00:39:24,100 Are you expecting someone? 919 00:39:24,100 --> 00:39:26,015 No, no. 920 00:39:27,452 --> 00:39:28,931 - Hey! My boy! 921 00:39:30,672 --> 00:39:31,847 Hi! 922 00:39:31,847 --> 00:39:32,979 - Everyone. - - Hey, Julie! 923 00:39:34,502 --> 00:39:36,504 Ooh, is that my baby, Eve? 924 00:39:36,504 --> 00:39:37,897 Come give Grandma kisses! 925 00:39:37,897 --> 00:39:40,682 I-I wish y-you could meet... the caterer 926 00:39:40,682 --> 00:39:42,031 - I got in for the evening. - Oh. 927 00:39:42,031 --> 00:39:44,425 And you can. Hi, I'm Flora. 928 00:39:44,425 --> 00:39:45,644 - Hi. - No, please don't. 929 00:39:45,644 --> 00:39:47,428 - Hi. -Yeah. - Oh. Sorry. 930 00:39:47,428 --> 00:39:49,038 - Come in. Do come in. - What? 931 00:39:49,038 --> 00:39:50,953 - Good to see you. -Okay. 932 00:39:50,953 --> 00:39:51,954 Hi, Mum. 933 00:39:51,954 --> 00:39:53,652 The caterer? 934 00:39:53,652 --> 00:39:55,654 - You have a caterer? - Well, I just thought I'd... 935 00:39:55,654 --> 00:39:58,134 - Starving, so this works out. - Hey. 936 00:40:00,006 --> 00:40:02,965 How did you forget that your entire family was coming over? 937 00:40:02,965 --> 00:40:04,880 Yeah, I mean, there's-there's been a lot of distractions 938 00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:06,795 - in the last couple days. - That's fair. 939 00:40:06,795 --> 00:40:08,449 Okay, what do you need me to do? 940 00:40:08,449 --> 00:40:10,582 Uh, okay, I wish there was a complete meal 941 00:40:10,582 --> 00:40:13,541 with all the trimmings right here in this kitchen. 942 00:40:16,588 --> 00:40:18,111 - That's pretty good! - Yeah? Okay. 943 00:40:18,111 --> 00:40:19,504 This is gonna be so fun. 944 00:40:19,504 --> 00:40:21,636 I bet your family's great. 945 00:40:21,636 --> 00:40:24,204 And then Paul looks directly at me and says, 946 00:40:24,204 --> 00:40:26,598 "David, I actually am an accountant." 947 00:40:28,034 --> 00:40:29,470 Imagine, we had quite a laugh about that. 948 00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:32,081 Why? 949 00:40:33,909 --> 00:40:35,998 I'm still a little confused. 950 00:40:35,998 --> 00:40:38,479 Where are Eve and Julie? 951 00:40:38,479 --> 00:40:40,612 Great question. - Yeah. [chuckles] Right. Um... 952 00:40:40,612 --> 00:40:42,744 We're-we're actually on a... 953 00:40:42,744 --> 00:40:44,485 bit of a break at the moment. 954 00:40:44,485 --> 00:40:46,269 -A break. What-what does that mean, a break? 955 00:40:46,269 --> 00:40:48,054 - Well, l-let me explain. Bernie, 956 00:40:48,054 --> 00:40:50,186 you've got to work on a marriage. -I know. 957 00:40:50,186 --> 00:40:51,579 Yeah, you can say that again. 958 00:40:51,579 --> 00:40:52,972 Excuse me. 959 00:40:52,972 --> 00:40:54,713 See? See, this is why I never took the plunge. 960 00:40:54,713 --> 00:40:56,889 You know? Some stallions, they just need to roam free. 961 00:40:56,889 --> 00:40:59,674 Bernard, hey, look, man, if you ever want to talk, 962 00:40:59,674 --> 00:41:00,936 mano y mano, 963 00:41:00,936 --> 00:41:02,590 I'm here for you, bud. 964 00:41:02,590 --> 00:41:04,070 Yeah, you're not using that correctly. 965 00:41:04,070 --> 00:41:05,550 Actually, I'm pretty sure I am. 966 00:41:05,550 --> 00:41:07,073 'Cause it's man friend to man friend. 967 00:41:07,073 --> 00:41:08,553 Who's ready for dead bird? 968 00:41:08,553 --> 00:41:10,163 Huh? 969 00:41:11,556 --> 00:41:12,818 That is a strange bunch. 970 00:41:12,818 --> 00:41:14,602 I mean, you're telling me? 971 00:41:16,082 --> 00:41:17,605 I-I j-- I just wish I could find a way 972 00:41:17,605 --> 00:41:18,780 to make them happy, you know? 973 00:41:19,999 --> 00:41:21,217 Wait a minute. 974 00:41:22,218 --> 00:41:24,960 Okay. I have a fantastic plan. 975 00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:26,788 Risky... 976 00:41:26,788 --> 00:41:28,964 but I think fantastic. 977 00:41:28,964 --> 00:41:30,618 All right, guys, just l-listen up. 978 00:41:30,618 --> 00:41:32,054 I've-I've got something I'd-I'd love to tell you. 979 00:41:32,054 --> 00:41:33,055 It's about me and Flora. 980 00:41:33,055 --> 00:41:34,187 Mm. See? Told you. 981 00:41:34,187 --> 00:41:35,188 He's already got a new girlfriend. 982 00:41:35,188 --> 00:41:36,276 No, it's-- it is-- 983 00:41:36,276 --> 00:41:37,190 it's nothing to do with that. 984 00:41:37,190 --> 00:41:38,539 It's-it's-it's... 985 00:41:38,539 --> 00:41:40,541 Uh, um... 986 00:41:40,541 --> 00:41:41,542 How do I say this? 987 00:41:41,542 --> 00:41:42,630 Um, Flora, she's a genie. 988 00:41:42,630 --> 00:41:44,893 - A what? 989 00:41:44,893 --> 00:41:46,634 Don't laugh. - -What? 990 00:41:46,634 --> 00:41:47,809 What? What? -BERNARD: She can make wishes come true. 991 00:41:47,809 --> 00:41:49,332 - Yeah. - As you all know, 992 00:41:49,332 --> 00:41:51,117 it's only three wishes. Absolutely only three, 993 00:41:51,117 --> 00:41:53,075 - but, yeah, that's, uh... - Yeah. Three. 994 00:41:53,075 --> 00:41:54,555 - Yeah. - That's my Christmas gift to... 995 00:41:54,555 --> 00:41:56,078 each one of you. Three wishes. 996 00:41:56,078 --> 00:41:57,993 Pretty good gift, right? 997 00:41:57,993 --> 00:41:59,734 Okay, 998 00:41:59,734 --> 00:42:01,562 okay, he's lost his mind. Julie's left him... -What? 999 00:42:01,562 --> 00:42:03,303 ...and he's lost his mind. I mean, 1000 00:42:03,303 --> 00:42:04,870 you all thought I was the one who was gonna go off the rails. 1001 00:42:04,870 --> 00:42:07,046 But, no, perfect Bernard... 1002 00:42:07,046 --> 00:42:08,917 Don't do that. Okay, it's true. 1003 00:42:08,917 --> 00:42:10,832 For example, Mar-Marvin, you just... 1004 00:42:10,832 --> 00:42:12,660 you just had to wear that Harvard sweatshirt, 1005 00:42:12,660 --> 00:42:14,836 again, even though we all know Diana hates it. 1006 00:42:14,836 --> 00:42:17,143 Because he didn't go to Harvard. - 1007 00:42:17,143 --> 00:42:19,014 - Why wear it? - I wish 1008 00:42:19,014 --> 00:42:22,061 Marvin was wearing something Diana actually liked. 1009 00:42:25,325 --> 00:42:27,936 And I wish Dad could be more like the man 1010 00:42:27,936 --> 00:42:28,937 Mum fell in love with. 1011 00:42:31,070 --> 00:42:32,680 Oh. - Whoa. 1012 00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:34,029 Oh, my God. And... 1013 00:42:34,029 --> 00:42:35,727 I wish Pete would stop referring to himself 1014 00:42:35,727 --> 00:42:37,816 as a "lone wolf" and just sign up for all the dating apps. 1015 00:42:43,648 --> 00:42:44,866 There you go. 1016 00:42:44,866 --> 00:42:45,998 There's my three. 1017 00:42:45,998 --> 00:42:47,216 Proof is in the genie pudding. 1018 00:42:47,216 --> 00:42:48,609 Am I right? 1019 00:42:48,609 --> 00:42:51,133 I wish I had my old husband back. 1020 00:42:53,048 --> 00:42:54,397 Oh, God. 1021 00:42:54,397 --> 00:42:56,878 I actually have three big ones planned. 1022 00:42:56,878 --> 00:42:59,315 First, I wish for my own whole set 1023 00:42:59,315 --> 00:43:02,362 of Honma titanium golf clubs. 1024 00:43:02,362 --> 00:43:04,233 - Oh! 1025 00:43:04,233 --> 00:43:06,279 You don't-- you don't even really like golf. 1026 00:43:06,279 --> 00:43:08,281 You just like wearing your weird wicking fabric shirts 1027 00:43:08,281 --> 00:43:09,848 and drinking in the clubhouse. 1028 00:43:09,848 --> 00:43:11,980 Baby, I wish you would stop talking 1029 00:43:11,980 --> 00:43:13,939 and just let me get on with this. 1030 00:43:13,939 --> 00:43:16,071 Uh, uh... 1031 00:43:18,857 --> 00:43:21,163 Does that mean Diana's never gonna be able to talk again? 1032 00:43:21,163 --> 00:43:22,687 Unless Marvin was to wish for her 1033 00:43:22,687 --> 00:43:24,166 not to be able to not talk anymore. 1034 00:43:24,166 --> 00:43:25,733 Oh, come on. 1035 00:43:25,733 --> 00:43:27,082 Dude! 1036 00:43:27,082 --> 00:43:28,388 Uh... 1037 00:43:28,388 --> 00:43:30,042 Okay. 1038 00:43:30,042 --> 00:43:32,261 Yeah, whatever. I, like, wish that... 1039 00:43:32,261 --> 00:43:33,915 Diana could talk again. 1040 00:43:35,090 --> 00:43:36,701 - Huh. 1041 00:43:36,701 --> 00:43:39,660 Well, thanks, babe. 1042 00:43:39,660 --> 00:43:41,793 Marvin, I wish you would just go to hell. 1043 00:43:42,837 --> 00:43:44,447 - Oh... 1044 00:43:44,447 --> 00:43:46,275 Okay, please stop! 1045 00:43:46,275 --> 00:43:49,670 Is anybody gonna wish Marvin back from hell? 1046 00:43:50,497 --> 00:43:52,020 Damn it. 1047 00:43:52,020 --> 00:43:53,152 Fine. 1048 00:43:53,152 --> 00:43:54,762 I guess... 1049 00:43:54,762 --> 00:43:57,025 I guess I wish he'd come back from hell. 1050 00:43:59,201 --> 00:44:00,768 Oh, my God! 1051 00:44:00,768 --> 00:44:02,378 What was it like? 1052 00:44:02,378 --> 00:44:04,380 Uh, I think it's pretty obvious. 1053 00:44:04,380 --> 00:44:06,034 Very hot down there. 1054 00:44:06,034 --> 00:44:07,775 Mm. -And how does the devil look like? 1055 00:44:07,775 --> 00:44:09,385 W-Well, he kind of looked like Ricky Gervais. 1056 00:44:09,385 --> 00:44:10,691 All right, stop. 1057 00:44:10,691 --> 00:44:12,954 You're a family. You're my family. 1058 00:44:12,954 --> 00:44:16,175 This is our one real chance for happiness. 1059 00:44:16,175 --> 00:44:17,176 Please, 1060 00:44:17,176 --> 00:44:19,221 just... focus. 1061 00:44:19,221 --> 00:44:20,745 - Yeah. Actually, 1062 00:44:20,745 --> 00:44:22,094 Bernard, 1063 00:44:22,094 --> 00:44:24,052 I just wish this whole thing was over. 1064 00:44:25,314 --> 00:44:26,707 Done. 1065 00:44:30,145 --> 00:44:31,407 Oh. 1066 00:44:31,407 --> 00:44:33,801 Oh, wowzers. 1067 00:44:34,889 --> 00:44:36,325 I mean, in all my years, 1068 00:44:36,325 --> 00:44:39,764 I have never seen anyone use the wishes worse. 1069 00:44:39,764 --> 00:44:41,113 Yeah. 1070 00:44:44,725 --> 00:44:47,162 I mean, we've got to be so careful. 1071 00:44:47,162 --> 00:44:49,164 All my family could literally have gone to hell. 1072 00:44:49,164 --> 00:44:50,426 One of 'em did. 1073 00:44:50,426 --> 00:44:51,689 Yeah. 1074 00:44:52,515 --> 00:44:55,475 Okay. It's WWTCD time. 1075 00:44:55,475 --> 00:44:56,519 What's that? 1076 00:44:56,519 --> 00:44:58,913 "What would Tom Cruise do?" 1077 00:44:58,913 --> 00:45:01,002 - Because Operation 1078 00:45:01,002 --> 00:45:04,876 Bring Julie and Eve Back Home is not Mission: Impossible. 1079 00:45:04,876 --> 00:45:05,877 What is it? 1080 00:45:05,877 --> 00:45:07,313 What? 1081 00:45:07,313 --> 00:45:08,923 It's Wishing: Impossible. 1082 00:45:10,359 --> 00:45:12,840 You know, I think we should start with, like, 1083 00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:15,147 kind of sprucing up the place for Julie. 1084 00:45:15,147 --> 00:45:16,931 You know? Which means probably getting... 1085 00:45:16,931 --> 00:45:20,500 rid of quite a few of these old, dusty Nardo trinkets. 1086 00:45:20,500 --> 00:45:22,894 This is our first fix. 1087 00:45:25,418 --> 00:45:26,854 You know what? You're right. 1088 00:45:26,854 --> 00:45:28,160 She actually always hated this thing. 1089 00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:29,857 - Yeah. - Yeah. I can't imagine why. 1090 00:45:29,857 --> 00:45:31,293 Is it your shirt? 1091 00:45:31,293 --> 00:45:32,991 Uh, no, it's not mine. 1092 00:45:32,991 --> 00:45:35,036 It's actually-- He was a famous footballer. 1093 00:45:35,036 --> 00:45:37,386 Do you have his underpants or trousers? 1094 00:45:37,386 --> 00:45:39,040 - It's not a crazy question. 1095 00:45:39,040 --> 00:45:40,302 Yeah, no, I don't have his pants. 1096 00:45:40,302 --> 00:45:42,217 So does anybody else have your shirt 1097 00:45:42,217 --> 00:45:46,004 or maybe, maybe your underpants under glass in their house? 1098 00:45:46,004 --> 00:45:47,135 Well, not yet, but... 1099 00:45:47,135 --> 00:45:48,876 Okay. All right. 1100 00:45:48,876 --> 00:45:50,182 Think we should swap it for something 1101 00:45:50,182 --> 00:45:52,358 maybe, maybe that Julie would enjoy. 1102 00:45:52,358 --> 00:45:53,402 What? 1103 00:45:53,402 --> 00:45:55,491 Let's swap it for something 1104 00:45:55,491 --> 00:45:57,929 - deeply respectful. You know? - Oh, okay. All right. 1105 00:45:57,929 --> 00:46:00,453 Um... Go on. Make it the Mona Lisa. 1106 00:46:03,456 --> 00:46:06,154 I mean, she could have smiled, right? 1107 00:46:06,154 --> 00:46:08,853 N-No, no, no. That's really-- that's very much the point. 1108 00:46:08,853 --> 00:46:09,854 Ah. 1109 00:46:09,854 --> 00:46:11,203 Okay. Well, I don't know. 1110 00:46:11,203 --> 00:46:12,944 I think we're off to a good start. 1111 00:46:14,075 --> 00:46:15,207 All right. 1112 00:46:15,207 --> 00:46:18,906 That's what I'm talking about. 1113 00:46:18,906 --> 00:46:20,125 - Well done! - Oh, thank you. 1114 00:46:20,125 --> 00:46:21,561 I mean, look at this, right? 1115 00:46:21,561 --> 00:46:23,345 I think Julie's gonna love it. 1116 00:46:23,345 --> 00:46:26,087 But you see? Everything's gonna be perfect again. 1117 00:46:26,087 --> 00:46:29,917 And you're gonna be back with Julie and Eve, and I'm... 1118 00:46:29,917 --> 00:46:32,398 you know, I'm-I'm g-- I'm gonna be... 1119 00:46:32,398 --> 00:46:33,921 - What? 1120 00:46:33,921 --> 00:46:35,618 Uh, nothing. You know? 1121 00:46:35,618 --> 00:46:37,011 I'll-I'll be around. 1122 00:46:37,011 --> 00:46:38,883 You know? Doing my thang. 1123 00:46:38,883 --> 00:46:42,103 -Which, of course, is doing your thang... 1124 00:46:42,103 --> 00:46:43,409 for you. 1125 00:46:44,976 --> 00:46:46,499 Which is great. 1126 00:46:47,674 --> 00:46:50,895 Okay, put a-- put a fork in me, I'm done. 1127 00:46:50,895 --> 00:46:52,592 Uh, that's-- I don't want you to put a fork in me. 1128 00:46:52,592 --> 00:46:54,028 - I'm just tired. - Okay. 1129 00:46:54,028 --> 00:46:56,552 Okay. All right, good night. 1130 00:46:56,552 --> 00:46:58,859 - Night. Night, Flora. - Uh-huh. 1131 00:48:15,980 --> 00:48:17,329 Mon Dieu. 1132 00:48:17,329 --> 00:48:19,200 - Mon Dieu. 1133 00:48:31,604 --> 00:48:32,648 Hey, Dad. 1134 00:48:32,648 --> 00:48:35,738 Hey, child. 1135 00:48:35,738 --> 00:48:38,219 Child's mother. Exactly on time. 1136 00:48:38,219 --> 00:48:41,657 Punctuality. Very important for relationships. 1137 00:48:41,657 --> 00:48:43,572 Right. I know that, now. 1138 00:48:44,617 --> 00:48:45,705 I'll see you tomorrow, baby. 1139 00:48:47,054 --> 00:48:48,055 Have fun. 1140 00:48:48,055 --> 00:48:49,970 Um, you'll bring her back? 1141 00:48:49,970 --> 00:48:51,363 Yeah, of course. I'll see you then. 1142 00:48:51,363 --> 00:48:54,018 - All right. Bye. - Bye. 1143 00:48:57,064 --> 00:48:59,371 I've got someone I want you to meet. 1144 00:49:01,112 --> 00:49:02,548 Hi, Eve. 1145 00:49:02,548 --> 00:49:04,332 So, this is, um, Miss Flora. 1146 00:49:04,332 --> 00:49:06,247 She's gonna be staying with us for a bit. 1147 00:49:06,247 --> 00:49:08,641 And if you need anything, just-just let me know, 1148 00:49:08,641 --> 00:49:11,731 because, you know, your wish is my command. 1149 00:49:11,731 --> 00:49:13,254 Indirectly. 1150 00:49:13,254 --> 00:49:15,126 - Okay. Young lady? - Yep. 1151 00:49:15,126 --> 00:49:16,997 I think I might have a couple of things 1152 00:49:16,997 --> 00:49:18,259 that might meet with your approval. 1153 00:49:19,521 --> 00:49:20,696 Why don't you have a look in your bedroom? 1154 00:49:20,696 --> 00:49:22,220 Is it a dollhouse? 1155 00:49:22,220 --> 00:49:24,091 It's definitely a dollhouse! 1156 00:49:26,093 --> 00:49:27,573 Why? 1157 00:49:27,573 --> 00:49:29,792 - Why are you-- - I'm sorry. I got very excited. 1158 00:49:31,533 --> 00:49:33,057 - Yeah? 1159 00:49:33,057 --> 00:49:35,189 Yes! Yes, you like it? 1160 00:49:35,189 --> 00:49:38,018 - I love it! - Go on. Go on and look. 1161 00:49:38,018 --> 00:49:40,064 Look at that. It's good. 1162 00:49:40,064 --> 00:49:42,327 Let's go to the bath. 1163 00:49:42,327 --> 00:49:43,763 Okay. 1164 00:49:43,763 --> 00:49:48,028 The trick is to be as precise as possible. 1165 00:49:48,028 --> 00:49:49,421 - You see? - Wow. 1166 00:49:49,421 --> 00:49:51,379 ♪ Merry Christmas, baby... 1167 00:49:51,379 --> 00:49:54,295 The dollhouse is awesome. Thanks, Dad. 1168 00:49:55,296 --> 00:49:56,645 Are you happy? 1169 00:49:56,645 --> 00:49:58,604 Yeah. 1170 00:50:01,128 --> 00:50:03,304 Oh, uh, Eve, Eve. 1171 00:50:03,304 --> 00:50:06,046 I'd love to see it if you want to show me around a bit more? 1172 00:50:06,046 --> 00:50:07,482 I'd love that. 1173 00:50:07,482 --> 00:50:09,484 Let's do it. Okay? 1174 00:50:09,484 --> 00:50:10,790 All right. You've got this, right? 1175 00:50:10,790 --> 00:50:13,445 Yeah. I got it. Precision? 1176 00:50:13,445 --> 00:50:16,230 ♪ You surely treat me nice 1177 00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:23,237 - Oh. 1178 00:50:23,237 --> 00:50:27,198 ♪ Love you, baby, the rest of my life ♪ 1179 00:50:29,591 --> 00:50:31,680 ♪ Merry Christmas, baby... 1180 00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:33,073 So, a running race? 1181 00:50:33,073 --> 00:50:34,509 Yep. 1182 00:50:34,509 --> 00:50:38,078 - Like an actual running race? - Yes, you run. 1183 00:50:38,078 --> 00:50:39,514 It's just, I'm so obviously gonna beat you. 1184 00:50:39,514 --> 00:50:41,255 I'm a fully grown man with long legs 1185 00:50:41,255 --> 00:50:43,344 and you're a small girl in old-fashioned shoes. 1186 00:50:43,344 --> 00:50:44,650 Yeah. 1187 00:50:44,650 --> 00:50:46,652 - Race you to the big tree! - Hey! 1188 00:50:46,652 --> 00:50:48,871 Hey, that's cheating! 1189 00:50:48,871 --> 00:50:51,352 Being clever is not cheating! 1190 00:50:52,353 --> 00:50:53,528 Uh... 1191 00:50:53,528 --> 00:50:56,749 do you use it for something? 1192 00:50:56,749 --> 00:50:58,403 Yes. 1193 00:50:58,403 --> 00:51:00,318 Does it breathe? 1194 00:51:05,584 --> 00:51:07,586 I'm reading this book about, 1195 00:51:07,586 --> 00:51:11,285 about parallel universes and time travel 1196 00:51:11,285 --> 00:51:13,200 - and dimensional portals. - Yes. 1197 00:51:13,200 --> 00:51:14,549 - Right? You know about th-- - Yeah. 1198 00:51:14,549 --> 00:51:15,681 - Have you heard about it? - I-- Well, yes. 1199 00:51:15,681 --> 00:51:17,596 Uh, there's a high likelihood 1200 00:51:17,596 --> 00:51:21,339 that there's another version of me that might be a, 1201 00:51:21,339 --> 00:51:23,341 like an equestrian trainer or, or a chef. 1202 00:51:23,341 --> 00:51:25,343 Hmm, I would say it's-- 1203 00:51:25,343 --> 00:51:27,432 You're definitely somewhere else on a horse. 1204 00:51:27,432 --> 00:51:29,260 - Hmm? Okay. 1205 00:51:31,131 --> 00:51:32,132 Ah. 1206 00:51:32,132 --> 00:51:34,134 Here comes trouble. 1207 00:51:34,134 --> 00:51:36,441 Hey, Flora. Hey, Lenny. 1208 00:51:36,441 --> 00:51:38,138 Hey, nice to have you back, kiddo. 1209 00:51:38,138 --> 00:51:39,661 Your dad's kind of boring on his own. 1210 00:51:39,661 --> 00:51:41,359 No way. 1211 00:51:41,359 --> 00:51:43,404 He used to be a selfish bastard, but now he's great. 1212 00:51:43,404 --> 00:51:46,538 - Oh... - Oh. Wow. 1213 00:51:46,538 --> 00:51:48,409 - Bye, Lenny. - Bye. 1214 00:52:08,690 --> 00:52:10,170 - Here she is, in one piece. 1215 00:52:10,170 --> 00:52:11,824 - Hi, Grandma. - Hey, sweetheart. 1216 00:52:11,824 --> 00:52:13,608 - Hey. 1217 00:52:13,608 --> 00:52:14,957 Did you have a good time? 1218 00:52:14,957 --> 00:52:17,873 - Really great. - Oh, good. 1219 00:52:17,873 --> 00:52:20,398 Thanks, Bernie. That's wonderful. 1220 00:52:34,325 --> 00:52:35,804 Hello? 1221 00:52:35,804 --> 00:52:38,764 - It's Julie. - What? 1222 00:52:40,679 --> 00:52:42,376 - Let me hear. - No, no, no, no. 1223 00:52:42,376 --> 00:52:44,770 No, that, that, that would be great. Um... 1224 00:52:44,770 --> 00:52:47,773 Oh, Friday night here, 7:00? 1225 00:52:47,773 --> 00:52:49,514 No, that's-that's, um, that's perfect. 1226 00:52:49,514 --> 00:52:51,777 Just the three of us? 1227 00:52:51,777 --> 00:52:54,910 Yeah, that's, that's, that's great. 1228 00:52:54,910 --> 00:52:57,304 Okay, um, yeah, I'll see you then. 1229 00:52:57,304 --> 00:52:59,437 Okay, bye. 1230 00:52:59,437 --> 00:53:00,916 What just happened? 1231 00:53:00,916 --> 00:53:03,745 Yeah, she, uh, she wants to come over Friday night. 1232 00:53:03,745 --> 00:53:05,399 You are back in business. 1233 00:53:05,399 --> 00:53:06,879 Right? You are back in what? 1234 00:53:06,879 --> 00:53:08,620 - Business. - That's right. 1235 00:53:08,620 --> 00:53:10,796 Okay. Do me a favor. 1236 00:53:10,796 --> 00:53:11,971 Let me handle dinner, 1237 00:53:11,971 --> 00:53:14,452 'cause romance is kind of my thing. 1238 00:53:14,452 --> 00:53:16,497 - Romance is your thing? - Yeah. 1239 00:53:16,497 --> 00:53:17,977 Okay, well, I-I wish you would do that. 1240 00:53:17,977 --> 00:53:20,327 - Okay. - Thank you, my friend. 1241 00:53:20,327 --> 00:53:21,981 Okay, this is it. 1242 00:53:21,981 --> 00:53:23,417 We are gonna do this, all right? 1243 00:53:23,417 --> 00:53:25,463 We are in it, and Julie's about 1244 00:53:25,463 --> 00:53:28,988 to find herself on the road to Ro-Nardomance. 1245 00:53:30,729 --> 00:53:33,862 Nardomance. Buh-buh. 1246 00:53:33,862 --> 00:53:36,474 ♪ Just kiss me once and kiss me twice ♪ 1247 00:53:36,474 --> 00:53:38,867 ♪ Then kiss me once again 1248 00:53:38,867 --> 00:53:42,523 ♪ It's been a long, long time 1249 00:53:43,959 --> 00:53:45,352 ♪ Haven't felt like this... 1250 00:53:45,352 --> 00:53:46,658 Hi, Dad! 1251 00:53:46,658 --> 00:53:48,964 - Come on. Come in. - Go. 1252 00:53:48,964 --> 00:53:51,924 All she's been talking about is that dollhouse. 1253 00:53:51,924 --> 00:53:53,012 Yeah, I bet. 1254 00:53:53,012 --> 00:53:55,536 Wow. 1255 00:53:55,536 --> 00:53:57,451 You weren't kidding... 1256 00:53:57,451 --> 00:53:59,453 when you said you spruced up the place. 1257 00:53:59,453 --> 00:54:03,414 Yeah, well, I know you always wanted a bit of a refresh. 1258 00:54:03,414 --> 00:54:06,417 - So... - Oh, my God. 1259 00:54:06,417 --> 00:54:09,594 - Oh, so this is the dollhouse. Do you like it? 1260 00:54:09,594 --> 00:54:10,899 Okay, well... 1261 00:54:12,379 --> 00:54:14,251 It's amazing. 1262 00:54:15,339 --> 00:54:16,862 Okay. Wow. 1263 00:54:16,862 --> 00:54:18,907 That was really delicious. 1264 00:54:18,907 --> 00:54:20,561 - Yeah? - Yeah. 1265 00:54:20,561 --> 00:54:22,563 All right, well, here you go. 1266 00:54:22,563 --> 00:54:24,391 Oh. Okay. 1267 00:54:24,391 --> 00:54:25,914 Why not? 1268 00:54:25,914 --> 00:54:27,916 When did you learn how to make martinis? 1269 00:54:27,916 --> 00:54:30,049 - Ah, cheers to you. - Cheers. 1270 00:54:32,443 --> 00:54:33,792 Oh, my God. 1271 00:54:33,792 --> 00:54:36,316 Look at that. 1272 00:54:36,316 --> 00:54:37,491 Fireworks. 1273 00:54:37,491 --> 00:54:39,841 How lucky are we? 1274 00:54:47,762 --> 00:54:49,634 Wow. 1275 00:54:49,634 --> 00:54:51,549 Look at that. 1276 00:54:51,549 --> 00:54:55,466 That is actually pretty magical. 1277 00:54:55,466 --> 00:54:56,989 Yeah. 1278 00:54:56,989 --> 00:54:58,773 ♪ Without you 1279 00:54:58,773 --> 00:55:02,995 ♪ So kiss me once, then kiss me twice ♪ 1280 00:55:02,995 --> 00:55:05,345 ♪ Then kiss me once again 1281 00:55:05,345 --> 00:55:07,521 ♪ It's been a long time, oh, yeah. ♪ 1282 00:55:07,521 --> 00:55:09,306 Hey, I, um... 1283 00:55:10,568 --> 00:55:14,093 I-- Can we actually just talk about something? 1284 00:55:14,093 --> 00:55:16,748 Uh, yeah. 1285 00:55:17,749 --> 00:55:19,359 Look, Bernie, I... 1286 00:55:19,359 --> 00:55:21,883 I know that this has been a... 1287 00:55:21,883 --> 00:55:25,452 really tough time and I just, um... 1288 00:55:25,452 --> 00:55:28,586 And I know that it's only been a couple weeks, 1289 00:55:28,586 --> 00:55:31,719 but I-I think it might be worth thinking 1290 00:55:31,719 --> 00:55:36,681 about how this all might work long-term. 1291 00:55:37,986 --> 00:55:39,379 Long-term? 1292 00:55:39,379 --> 00:55:40,859 Look, I don't mean forever. 1293 00:55:40,859 --> 00:55:42,426 Look, I don't, 1294 00:55:42,426 --> 00:55:43,601 I don't know what's gonna happen, 1295 00:55:43,601 --> 00:55:45,472 I just-- 1296 00:55:45,472 --> 00:55:48,388 Like, longer-term. Like now. 1297 00:55:48,388 --> 00:55:50,129 You know, f-for instance, 1298 00:55:50,129 --> 00:55:53,001 I was thinking that maybe you could take Eve 1299 00:55:53,001 --> 00:55:55,526 on the 23rd and the 24th? 1300 00:55:56,831 --> 00:56:00,661 Uh, uh, you mean, a-actual Christmas Eve. 1301 00:56:00,661 --> 00:56:01,923 Yeah. 1302 00:56:01,923 --> 00:56:05,971 Yeah, it... seems as though magically, um, 1303 00:56:05,971 --> 00:56:09,801 us taking time apart has been the making of you two. 1304 00:56:09,801 --> 00:56:12,673 I mean, that's good news. 1305 00:56:12,673 --> 00:56:15,589 Though, sort of cloaked in bad. 1306 00:56:16,634 --> 00:56:19,027 Bernard, you're a good man. 1307 00:56:21,203 --> 00:56:22,509 Thank you for dinner. 1308 00:56:30,604 --> 00:56:31,997 Bye, Dad. 1309 00:56:33,085 --> 00:56:34,739 See you tomorrow, darling. 1310 00:56:40,919 --> 00:56:42,442 Sorry. 1311 00:56:42,442 --> 00:56:46,011 - I'm sorry, that was tough. - Yeah, I know. 1312 00:56:46,011 --> 00:56:49,101 But the Eve news, that's great, so... 1313 00:56:49,101 --> 00:56:50,624 You know, I really thought 1314 00:56:50,624 --> 00:56:52,104 the fireworks were gonna work better. 1315 00:56:52,104 --> 00:56:54,889 Yeah, the fireworks were pretty epic actually. 1316 00:56:54,889 --> 00:56:56,978 I mean, I-I thought you had some other stuff? 1317 00:56:56,978 --> 00:57:00,025 Yeah, I did, but then Julie kind of left 1318 00:57:00,025 --> 00:57:02,027 before I hit my stride. 1319 00:57:03,028 --> 00:57:04,856 Ta-da! 1320 00:57:04,856 --> 00:57:07,554 I mean, not too shabby, right? 1321 00:57:08,599 --> 00:57:09,730 Is that a bear? 1322 00:57:09,730 --> 00:57:11,906 It used to be. 1323 00:57:11,906 --> 00:57:14,082 And a fire? We don't have a chimney. 1324 00:57:14,082 --> 00:57:15,475 I'm a genie. 1325 00:57:15,475 --> 00:57:16,520 Right. 1326 00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:17,608 Ooh, I should let the band go. 1327 00:57:17,608 --> 00:57:19,087 The band? 1328 00:57:19,087 --> 00:57:20,959 - Hey, guys, I-- Okay, here we go. 1329 00:57:20,959 --> 00:57:23,004 One, two, three, four. 1330 00:57:35,756 --> 00:57:37,758 What? 1331 00:57:37,758 --> 00:57:39,760 - What? - It's Julie. 1332 00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:40,761 No. 1333 00:57:40,761 --> 00:57:42,676 It's Julie. 1334 00:57:42,676 --> 00:57:44,112 She went all the way downstairs 1335 00:57:44,112 --> 00:57:46,027 and she started thinking about your Nardoness, 1336 00:57:46,027 --> 00:57:49,814 then she came all the way back upstairs for-for this. 1337 00:57:49,814 --> 00:57:51,076 - Let's just... - Do you think? Look-- 1338 00:57:51,076 --> 00:57:52,512 - Ow! Don't do that. - Yeah. Okay. 1339 00:57:52,512 --> 00:57:54,035 It's just good energy for ya. 1340 00:57:54,035 --> 00:57:55,036 - Okay. - Yeah? 1341 00:57:55,036 --> 00:57:56,516 Oh, I should not be here. 1342 00:57:56,516 --> 00:57:57,952 - Okay, you know what? - You, you-- 1343 00:57:57,952 --> 00:57:59,519 I've got a date with Tom Cruise tonight, so. 1344 00:57:59,519 --> 00:58:00,999 Okay, good. Um, well, hey, 1345 00:58:00,999 --> 00:58:03,044 I wi-- I wish you were at that cinema. 1346 00:58:03,044 --> 00:58:04,872 Thanks, Nardo. Good luck. 1347 00:58:04,872 --> 00:58:06,744 ♪ Kiss me twice 1348 00:58:06,744 --> 00:58:08,789 ♪ Kiss me once again 1349 00:58:08,789 --> 00:58:10,051 ♪ It's been a long time 1350 00:58:10,051 --> 00:58:12,097 - ♪ Oh, yeah. 1351 00:58:13,664 --> 00:58:15,274 Bernard, there's smoke coming through the vents. 1352 00:58:15,274 --> 00:58:16,623 Everything okay in there? 1353 00:58:19,931 --> 00:58:22,063 Oh. 1354 00:58:23,630 --> 00:58:24,979 Ah, Flora. 1355 00:58:24,979 --> 00:58:26,285 - Here we go! And now, 1356 00:58:26,285 --> 00:58:27,591 for your feature presentation. 1357 00:58:27,591 --> 00:58:28,809 Here we go, here we go. 1358 00:58:28,809 --> 00:58:31,203 Here we go. Woo-hoo! 1359 00:58:33,771 --> 00:58:35,816 Buddy, you're lucky we got here in time. 1360 00:58:35,816 --> 00:58:38,558 What are you doing with an open fire in there anyways? 1361 00:58:38,558 --> 00:58:39,777 That's completely illegal. 1362 00:58:41,169 --> 00:58:43,171 Hey, Ricky. The Mona Lisa. 1363 00:58:43,171 --> 00:58:45,652 It's missing, ain't it? 1364 00:58:45,652 --> 00:58:47,654 Yeah. 1365 00:58:47,654 --> 00:58:49,003 I-Is it? 1366 00:58:49,003 --> 00:58:51,658 - Yeah. - It's right there. 1367 00:58:51,658 --> 00:58:54,705 I wish I could swap the jersey back. 1368 00:58:54,705 --> 00:58:58,143 Give it to me, Mr. Thomas Cruise Control. 1369 00:59:00,145 --> 00:59:01,581 Come on, lock up, baby. 1370 00:59:05,150 --> 00:59:07,848 You okay, buddy? 1371 00:59:11,896 --> 00:59:13,201 Wow, Bernie. 1372 00:59:13,201 --> 00:59:15,029 Been a busy night, huh? 1373 00:59:15,029 --> 00:59:16,988 Yeah, it sure has. 1374 00:59:19,425 --> 00:59:22,167 Hey, we'll get you out, buddy. 1375 00:59:22,167 --> 00:59:24,604 - Stay strong. 1376 00:59:39,271 --> 00:59:40,881 Okay, kid. 1377 00:59:40,881 --> 00:59:43,188 The good news is that it's gonna take a bit 1378 00:59:43,188 --> 00:59:45,930 to extradite you to France, so... 1379 00:59:45,930 --> 00:59:49,716 you'll be here in a nice, warm American cell over Christmas. 1380 00:59:49,716 --> 00:59:52,371 - Mm-hmm. - It's not very good news. 1381 00:59:52,371 --> 00:59:54,895 I mean, if... 1382 00:59:54,895 --> 00:59:56,680 if I miss Christmas, 1383 00:59:56,680 --> 00:59:58,290 my life is over. 1384 00:59:58,290 --> 01:00:02,686 Missing Christmas is the least of your problems, buddy. 1385 01:00:03,687 --> 01:00:07,734 Do you know anything about the French penal system? 1386 01:00:07,734 --> 01:00:08,996 Uh, n-no. 1387 01:00:08,996 --> 01:00:12,043 Think Texas Chainsaw Massacre 1388 01:00:12,043 --> 01:00:17,091 where everyone is dressed like Inspector Clouseau. 1389 01:00:17,091 --> 01:00:19,659 - This can't be happening. - It's happening, 1390 01:00:19,659 --> 01:00:22,749 but the solution is quite simple. 1391 01:00:22,749 --> 01:00:25,970 All you got to do... Look at me, look at me. 1392 01:00:27,711 --> 01:00:29,974 Tell me the truth. Come on. 1393 01:00:32,150 --> 01:00:34,369 Okay, okay. 1394 01:00:34,369 --> 01:00:36,110 Now we're talking. 1395 01:00:36,110 --> 01:00:38,678 Okay. Okay. 1396 01:00:38,678 --> 01:00:41,115 The-the truth is... 1397 01:00:41,115 --> 01:00:43,161 I had an accomplice. 1398 01:00:45,119 --> 01:00:47,818 Officer Pepper to the bullpen. 1399 01:00:48,993 --> 01:00:51,299 Wow. Look at these digs. 1400 01:00:51,299 --> 01:00:53,084 You do okay, don't you? 1401 01:00:53,084 --> 01:00:54,955 - Is that the bad guy? - What? 1402 01:00:54,955 --> 01:00:57,436 Nardo, I am here! I am in the building! 1403 01:00:57,436 --> 01:00:59,220 Eagle has landed. 1404 01:00:59,220 --> 01:01:00,961 - Nardo, I am in the building. Ma'am. Ma'am. 1405 01:01:00,961 --> 01:01:03,790 - Please don't do that. - Got it. 1406 01:01:03,790 --> 01:01:06,097 I thought that's what it was there for. 1407 01:01:06,097 --> 01:01:09,056 So sor-- [gasps] Wha-- You guys both have guns. 1408 01:01:09,056 --> 01:01:10,492 I just have my dagger. 1409 01:01:10,492 --> 01:01:12,843 - What? No. Put your hands up! 1410 01:01:12,843 --> 01:01:14,453 Oh, that's nice. 1411 01:01:18,413 --> 01:01:19,719 Quit screwing around. 1412 01:01:19,719 --> 01:01:20,720 Take your hat off. 1413 01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:21,895 Okay. I'll do that. 1414 01:01:21,895 --> 01:01:24,245 Commencing interview. 1415 01:01:25,551 --> 01:01:27,771 - Is-is this for me? - Okay. 1416 01:01:27,771 --> 01:01:29,163 Thank you very much. 1417 01:01:29,163 --> 01:01:30,991 You're welcome. 1418 01:01:32,384 --> 01:01:33,341 Name. 1419 01:01:33,341 --> 01:01:35,126 - Mine? - Yes. 1420 01:01:35,126 --> 01:01:36,388 Oh, okay. 1421 01:01:36,388 --> 01:01:40,087 Hi, there, um, Flora Gwendolen Locheed, 1422 01:01:40,087 --> 01:01:43,525 uh, Firepit McAllister Cruise. 1423 01:01:43,525 --> 01:01:46,311 Is that, is that a "Cruz" with a "U-Z"? 1424 01:01:46,311 --> 01:01:47,921 - S-E. - S-E. 1425 01:01:47,921 --> 01:01:50,750 - As in, as in Tom. - Okay. 1426 01:01:50,750 --> 01:01:52,491 Date of birth. 1427 01:01:52,491 --> 01:01:56,843 Let's see, it's second day of the Feast of Angus the Fierce. 1428 01:01:56,843 --> 01:01:59,367 Yes. Second day. -But what year of the second day? 1429 01:01:59,367 --> 01:02:02,283 - Oh, geez. - I need a month. I need a year. 1430 01:02:02,283 --> 01:02:05,809 You know what? I'm gonna say 2,152 years ago 1431 01:02:05,809 --> 01:02:08,420 is probably... 1432 01:02:08,420 --> 01:02:11,031 I think that's pretty darn close. 1433 01:02:12,032 --> 01:02:17,429 Okay, we're gonna put down 1969 from the looks of it. 1434 01:02:18,430 --> 01:02:20,127 - Okay. - Okay. 1435 01:02:20,127 --> 01:02:22,782 - What's your profession? - How do I-- 1436 01:02:22,782 --> 01:02:25,567 Well, okay, I guess the honest answer would be... 1437 01:02:25,567 --> 01:02:27,482 I, you know, dabbled in a little bit of 1438 01:02:27,482 --> 01:02:30,355 being a warrior/hunter-gatherer, 1439 01:02:30,355 --> 01:02:33,880 but now, really, I strictly just, uh, I'm a genie. 1440 01:02:33,880 --> 01:02:36,056 Uh, what was the last part? 1441 01:02:36,056 --> 01:02:39,190 Uh, but now I'm, uh, just a genie. 1442 01:02:39,190 --> 01:02:41,061 Okay. 1443 01:02:42,846 --> 01:02:44,369 You believe that you're a genie? 1444 01:02:44,369 --> 01:02:46,284 Well, I know I'm a genie. 1445 01:02:46,284 --> 01:02:48,982 - You know you're a genie? - Yes, because I'm a genie. 1446 01:02:49,983 --> 01:02:51,550 Uh, so, what kind of prescription drugs 1447 01:02:51,550 --> 01:02:52,594 are you on now? 1448 01:02:52,594 --> 01:02:53,987 Ooh. 1449 01:02:53,987 --> 01:02:55,293 I don't know. What have you got? 1450 01:02:55,293 --> 01:02:56,990 What are you offering? 1451 01:02:58,600 --> 01:03:00,472 Okay, look, uh... 1452 01:03:00,472 --> 01:03:02,430 I'm gonna be honest with you. 1453 01:03:02,430 --> 01:03:05,520 I don't know if this is some kind of bit you're doing, 1454 01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:09,133 you're crazy, or what, but... 1455 01:03:09,133 --> 01:03:10,395 I want to run with this for a second. 1456 01:03:10,395 --> 01:03:12,353 - Okay? - Okay. 1457 01:03:12,353 --> 01:03:14,442 So you are this magical genie. 1458 01:03:14,442 --> 01:03:17,271 - That's correct. - So, if that's the case, 1459 01:03:17,271 --> 01:03:19,317 you have to know exactly 1460 01:03:19,317 --> 01:03:22,581 what you and your friend Bernard are in for with prison. 1461 01:03:22,581 --> 01:03:24,539 Okay? You're gonna be stuck 1462 01:03:24,539 --> 01:03:27,325 in a little square box for eternity. 1463 01:03:28,587 --> 01:03:30,502 No friends. 1464 01:03:30,502 --> 01:03:32,156 No family. 1465 01:03:32,156 --> 01:03:34,245 No freedom. 1466 01:03:34,245 --> 01:03:37,291 How does that sound to you? 1467 01:03:40,555 --> 01:03:42,470 Familiar. 1468 01:03:59,444 --> 01:04:01,315 Get ready, buddy boy. 1469 01:04:01,315 --> 01:04:03,448 December 23. 1470 01:04:03,448 --> 01:04:05,493 Guess where you're going? 1471 01:04:05,493 --> 01:04:07,495 JFK. 1472 01:04:07,495 --> 01:04:10,672 We're transferring you and Ms. McAllister to France 1473 01:04:10,672 --> 01:04:13,066 immediately. 1474 01:04:13,066 --> 01:04:15,547 Goodbye. Arrivederci. 1475 01:04:15,547 --> 01:04:18,202 Adios. Salaam alaikum salaam. 1476 01:04:20,378 --> 01:04:22,946 Right, well, I-I guess we're just gonna have to live 1477 01:04:22,946 --> 01:04:24,991 with the consequences of our actions. 1478 01:04:24,991 --> 01:04:28,212 Right? Just-just two crooks 1479 01:04:28,212 --> 01:04:29,996 in the back of a high-security van, 1480 01:04:29,996 --> 01:04:32,346 wishing they'd never got greedy. 1481 01:04:32,346 --> 01:04:34,914 You're funny, that's what I like about you, Bernard. 1482 01:04:34,914 --> 01:04:37,525 Like, as if we're gonna put you both in the same vehicle 1483 01:04:37,525 --> 01:04:40,702 for hours so you could get your story straight. 1484 01:04:40,702 --> 01:04:43,531 What kind of idiots do you think we are? 1485 01:04:45,359 --> 01:04:46,491 Right. 1486 01:04:46,491 --> 01:04:49,146 Hey. Get him out. 1487 01:04:55,326 --> 01:04:57,067 Hmm. 1488 01:05:09,775 --> 01:05:12,038 Flora! 1489 01:05:12,038 --> 01:05:14,432 I wish we could swap back! 1490 01:05:14,432 --> 01:05:16,434 Oh, so now you want to talk, huh? 1491 01:05:23,006 --> 01:05:24,485 Hey, hey. 1492 01:05:24,485 --> 01:05:25,530 - All right, come on. - Flora, it's me, it's Bernie. 1493 01:05:25,530 --> 01:05:27,314 I wish we could swap back. 1494 01:05:27,314 --> 01:05:29,012 - I wish we could swap back. Hey, buddy, buddy. 1495 01:05:29,012 --> 01:05:30,578 I wish we could swap that painting back. 1496 01:05:30,578 --> 01:05:31,579 Get him out of here. 1497 01:05:35,235 --> 01:05:37,063 Seriously. 1498 01:05:37,063 --> 01:05:39,065 - You okay? - Yeah, thanks. 1499 01:05:39,065 --> 01:05:40,153 Wow. 1500 01:05:46,029 --> 01:05:47,291 - Yeah? Detective Perez, 1501 01:05:47,291 --> 01:05:48,988 we have the French. 1502 01:05:48,988 --> 01:05:51,469 - The French? Put 'em on. - Yeah. 1503 01:05:54,646 --> 01:05:56,343 Bonjour. 1504 01:06:01,305 --> 01:06:04,134 Bring me the painting! 1505 01:06:05,222 --> 01:06:07,224 It's not a painting, sir. 1506 01:06:07,224 --> 01:06:09,095 I know it's not a painting. 1507 01:06:09,095 --> 01:06:11,184 It's the painting. 1508 01:06:11,184 --> 01:06:14,274 The most valuable painting in the world. 1509 01:06:14,274 --> 01:06:15,972 You're not gonna like this, boss. 1510 01:06:18,452 --> 01:06:19,714 It's a jersey. 1511 01:06:23,066 --> 01:06:25,242 I'm gonna have to kill someone. 1512 01:06:27,722 --> 01:06:30,421 - That was close. - Way too close. 1513 01:06:30,421 --> 01:06:32,292 We could've been fairly and squarely screwed. 1514 01:06:32,292 --> 01:06:34,033 The wishing has to stop, right? 1515 01:06:34,033 --> 01:06:35,817 Well, yeah, maybe. 1516 01:06:35,817 --> 01:06:37,384 - Except... - Except what? 1517 01:06:37,384 --> 01:06:38,820 Well, I mean, except Julie and Eve 1518 01:06:38,820 --> 01:06:40,300 are gonna arrive at mine any minute. 1519 01:06:40,300 --> 01:06:41,649 Okay, that's okay. I mean, this is like 1520 01:06:41,649 --> 01:06:44,261 classic Flora and Nardo stuff, right? 1521 01:06:44,261 --> 01:06:47,307 I mean, kicking names and taking butts. 1522 01:06:47,307 --> 01:06:48,700 This is what we do. 1523 01:06:50,658 --> 01:06:52,312 - Uh... - Okay. 1524 01:06:52,312 --> 01:06:54,140 So, yeah, they're nearly here, so... 1525 01:06:54,140 --> 01:06:56,099 - Okay, okay. What do we do? - So... 1526 01:06:56,099 --> 01:06:58,144 Oh, uh... 1527 01:06:58,144 --> 01:07:00,407 Just wondered if you could maybe go invisible. 1528 01:07:00,407 --> 01:07:01,843 You know, just... 1529 01:07:01,843 --> 01:07:03,193 - Just-- Yeah. - No, that's-- No, of course. 1530 01:07:03,193 --> 01:07:04,498 That's the right thing. 1531 01:07:04,498 --> 01:07:06,718 - Okay, good luck. - Thank you. 1532 01:07:18,469 --> 01:07:20,340 Bye, Grandma. 1533 01:07:24,562 --> 01:07:26,433 - Hey, hey, sweetie. - Dad! 1534 01:07:26,433 --> 01:07:28,609 Ah. 1535 01:07:28,609 --> 01:07:30,524 - How you doing? Yeah? - Good. 1536 01:07:30,524 --> 01:07:32,526 - Hey. - Hey, um, all right. 1537 01:07:32,526 --> 01:07:34,137 Well, I'll leave you to it. 1538 01:07:34,137 --> 01:07:36,835 - Thank you. - Have a good time, you two. 1539 01:07:36,835 --> 01:07:38,402 - Yeah. Uh, you, too. - Bye, Mom. 1540 01:07:38,402 --> 01:07:40,360 Yeah. 1541 01:07:43,537 --> 01:07:45,191 What you got in the bag, huh? 1542 01:07:45,191 --> 01:07:47,193 You look so cute in this jumper. 1543 01:07:47,193 --> 01:07:48,325 - Thank you. - Where'd you get it? 1544 01:07:48,325 --> 01:07:49,848 Oh, Grandma got it for me. 1545 01:07:49,848 --> 01:07:51,371 Grandma got it for you. Did you get me anything? 1546 01:07:51,371 --> 01:07:53,765 Mm. Sorry. 1547 01:08:01,338 --> 01:08:02,904 This is the big chimney, right? 1548 01:08:02,904 --> 01:08:05,559 How many little chimneys can you put there? 1549 01:08:05,559 --> 01:08:07,822 You have to make sure you don't tell Mum that we've exclusively 1550 01:08:07,822 --> 01:08:09,781 been eating sugar for the last 48 hours. 1551 01:08:09,781 --> 01:08:11,435 I won't. 1552 01:08:11,435 --> 01:08:12,784 I can keep a secret. 1553 01:08:12,784 --> 01:08:14,394 I never told Mom about you smoking 1554 01:08:14,394 --> 01:08:15,569 when she was at her high school reunion. 1555 01:08:15,569 --> 01:08:17,919 BERNARD and FLORA: Oh! 1556 01:08:17,919 --> 01:08:19,791 Burn. 1557 01:08:19,791 --> 01:08:22,272 But you still kind of keep things from me. 1558 01:08:22,272 --> 01:08:24,274 Me? What are you talking about? 1559 01:08:24,274 --> 01:08:25,579 I'm your dad. I tell you everything. 1560 01:08:25,579 --> 01:08:27,146 Dad, all of a sudden, 1561 01:08:27,146 --> 01:08:29,714 there's a random lady living in our house? 1562 01:08:31,629 --> 01:08:33,544 Oh, she's good. Real good. 1563 01:08:34,719 --> 01:08:37,765 Okay. Well, I mean, the-the truth... 1564 01:08:37,765 --> 01:08:38,766 I mean, do you want to do the honors? 1565 01:08:38,766 --> 01:08:40,246 You're the boss. 1566 01:08:40,246 --> 01:08:42,683 Yeah, of course. I forget that sometimes. 1567 01:08:42,683 --> 01:08:44,250 Okay, I'm gonna tell her. I'm gonna tell you. 1568 01:08:44,250 --> 01:08:45,512 - Listen, okay. - Mm-hmm. 1569 01:08:45,512 --> 01:08:47,253 So, um... 1570 01:08:47,253 --> 01:08:48,776 Flora here, fabulous Flora... 1571 01:08:48,776 --> 01:08:50,865 - Oh, thank you. - Thank you. 1572 01:08:54,434 --> 01:08:55,740 She's a genie. 1573 01:08:55,740 --> 01:08:57,481 Ta-da. 1574 01:08:57,481 --> 01:08:59,178 Dad, I'm eight. 1575 01:08:59,178 --> 01:09:00,745 You got to come up with something better than that. 1576 01:09:00,745 --> 01:09:02,486 - No, it's true. - That's a tough cookie. 1577 01:09:02,486 --> 01:09:04,270 - Wow. - She is. She really is. 1578 01:09:04,270 --> 01:09:06,316 So, Flora, you're a genie? 1579 01:09:06,316 --> 01:09:07,839 - I am. - So, in that case, 1580 01:09:07,839 --> 01:09:09,797 you must have a magic flying carpet. 1581 01:09:09,797 --> 01:09:12,539 - Funny you should mention that. 1582 01:09:28,338 --> 01:09:30,775 - Hey, should we have some fun? - Yeah! 1583 01:09:42,874 --> 01:09:44,354 Let's go, let's go! 1584 01:09:47,226 --> 01:09:48,706 Yeah! 1585 01:09:50,708 --> 01:09:52,666 Oh, oh, oh, look at this guy. Wait. 1586 01:09:53,754 --> 01:09:55,234 - Go home! 1587 01:09:55,234 --> 01:09:57,715 - It's Christmas! - Go home! 1588 01:10:01,066 --> 01:10:02,981 Whoa! Did you see his face? 1589 01:10:17,082 --> 01:10:19,911 - Ready to go to Grandma's? - Mm-hmm. 1590 01:10:23,654 --> 01:10:25,612 Thank you, Flora. 1591 01:10:25,612 --> 01:10:27,310 That was the best day of her life. 1592 01:10:36,971 --> 01:10:41,367 So, you've done everything for Julie and Eve. 1593 01:10:41,367 --> 01:10:43,587 I was just wondering if there's maybe something 1594 01:10:43,587 --> 01:10:45,980 that you want for Christmas. 1595 01:10:47,765 --> 01:10:49,723 Well, you know what? I-I did have 1596 01:10:49,723 --> 01:10:51,421 one or two little thoughts. 1597 01:10:52,422 --> 01:10:54,728 And finally, a charming Christmas story. 1598 01:10:54,728 --> 01:10:57,078 This evening, the Bowery Mission received 1599 01:10:57,078 --> 01:10:59,472 an unexpected donation from Oliver Flaxman, 1600 01:10:59,472 --> 01:11:02,345 owner of New York's own Flaxman's Auction House. 1601 01:11:02,345 --> 01:11:04,912 The check for $100 million makes up 1602 01:11:04,912 --> 01:11:07,480 the entirety of Flaxman's personal fortune, 1603 01:11:07,480 --> 01:11:09,613 and it will go towards feeding and caring 1604 01:11:09,613 --> 01:11:11,092 for the unhoused this Christmas. 1605 01:11:11,092 --> 01:11:13,399 We go down to Flaxman's Auctions now, 1606 01:11:13,399 --> 01:11:15,532 where a grateful crowd has gathered. 1607 01:11:15,532 --> 01:11:16,968 Mr. Oliver Flaxman? 1608 01:11:18,317 --> 01:11:19,927 - Uh, yes. - What made you make 1609 01:11:19,927 --> 01:11:22,887 such an incredibly generous gesture? 1610 01:11:22,887 --> 01:11:24,758 What gesture? 1611 01:11:24,758 --> 01:11:26,456 Oh, my God. -REPORTER: Well, the Bowery Mission just received 1612 01:11:26,456 --> 01:11:29,763 a $100 million charity check from you. -Oh, wait. 1613 01:11:29,763 --> 01:11:32,679 Which was just deposited to help feed the unhoused 1614 01:11:32,679 --> 01:11:33,811 - this Christmas. 1615 01:11:33,811 --> 01:11:35,769 That's right. 1616 01:11:35,769 --> 01:11:37,989 Well, you've become a national hero because of your generosity. 1617 01:11:37,989 --> 01:11:39,991 I have? 1618 01:11:39,991 --> 01:11:41,601 Could I, could I just have a moment? 1619 01:11:41,601 --> 01:11:42,776 Absolutely. 1620 01:11:42,776 --> 01:11:45,431 - Yeah. - You suck. Boo! 1621 01:11:45,431 --> 01:11:46,606 - Boo. 1622 01:11:46,606 --> 01:11:47,955 And what a wonderful story that is. 1623 01:11:47,955 --> 01:11:49,000 - That's it for tonight. 1624 01:11:49,000 --> 01:11:50,915 From all of us here, goodbye 1625 01:11:50,915 --> 01:11:53,091 - and very merry Christmas Eve. - That's the way. Nicely done. 1626 01:11:54,092 --> 01:11:57,138 Uh... you got to be kidding me. 1627 01:11:57,138 --> 01:12:01,012 This is it. Best present ever. 1628 01:12:01,012 --> 01:12:02,492 What do you think? Do you like it? 1629 01:12:02,492 --> 01:12:03,623 - I-- Well, uh, come on. 1630 01:12:04,972 --> 01:12:06,365 I don't know, when-when we first met, 1631 01:12:06,365 --> 01:12:07,714 I was, I was just... 1632 01:12:07,714 --> 01:12:09,455 I was the most unhappy man in the world. 1633 01:12:09,455 --> 01:12:12,415 I'd-I'd lost everything, but at least I have Eve back. 1634 01:12:12,415 --> 01:12:13,633 Yeah. 1635 01:12:13,633 --> 01:12:15,592 Now, I'm... 1636 01:12:15,592 --> 01:12:17,376 you know, I'm-I'm so much better, 1637 01:12:17,376 --> 01:12:20,553 so I-I wanted to get you something special for Christmas. 1638 01:12:20,553 --> 01:12:22,163 And you have. I mean, I have everything 1639 01:12:22,163 --> 01:12:24,644 I could ever want. 1640 01:12:24,644 --> 01:12:27,168 Well, not quite everything. 1641 01:12:27,168 --> 01:12:29,649 Did-did you see the card that came with it? 1642 01:12:29,649 --> 01:12:32,652 Oh. What? 1643 01:12:32,652 --> 01:12:34,654 Oh. 1644 01:12:38,441 --> 01:12:40,399 Please be a hot chocolate gift certificate. 1645 01:12:40,399 --> 01:12:41,835 - Please. - Just read the card. 1646 01:12:41,835 --> 01:12:42,923 Read the card. 1647 01:12:42,923 --> 01:12:44,838 Ah. 1648 01:12:44,838 --> 01:12:46,579 That's great. 1649 01:12:54,021 --> 01:12:55,371 I... 1650 01:13:00,680 --> 01:13:03,596 We're equals, Flora. 1651 01:13:03,596 --> 01:13:07,557 Now, how can things go well for me and not for both of us? 1652 01:13:10,951 --> 01:13:13,954 I don't think I remember how to have my own life. 1653 01:13:16,174 --> 01:13:18,394 I think you'll get the hang of it. 1654 01:13:19,525 --> 01:13:22,180 And I thought the sweatshirt was good. 1655 01:13:22,180 --> 01:13:24,574 - I mean, mm... 1656 01:13:24,574 --> 01:13:26,576 - I mean, it is. 1657 01:13:29,274 --> 01:13:31,798 Yeah, that's, um, that's my last wish. 1658 01:13:32,756 --> 01:13:35,541 How do you, how do you want to do it? 1659 01:13:35,541 --> 01:13:38,544 Well, it comes with a bit of... of good news. 1660 01:13:38,544 --> 01:13:41,939 Um, when a genie goes, 1661 01:13:41,939 --> 01:13:44,942 you know, usually people realize that they forgot something, 1662 01:13:44,942 --> 01:13:47,727 so when I go, 1663 01:13:47,727 --> 01:13:50,600 you're still allowed three wishes. 1664 01:13:50,600 --> 01:13:53,559 No, that's where the three wishes thing comes from. 1665 01:13:53,559 --> 01:13:56,257 That's where the three wishes thing comes from. 1666 01:13:56,257 --> 01:13:59,565 You-you got any ideas? 1667 01:13:59,565 --> 01:14:02,568 You know, I think the whole point is that 1668 01:14:02,568 --> 01:14:05,136 you'll know what you need when it happens. 1669 01:14:06,180 --> 01:14:08,966 So I'm just gonna leave that to you, my friend. 1670 01:14:22,022 --> 01:14:24,198 Should I do it? 1671 01:14:25,722 --> 01:14:27,593 - Do it. Do it. - Do it? 1672 01:14:27,593 --> 01:14:29,160 Okay. 1673 01:14:34,078 --> 01:14:35,949 I guess this is... 1674 01:14:35,949 --> 01:14:37,951 this is the end. 1675 01:14:37,951 --> 01:14:39,779 Yeah, I'm... out of here. 1676 01:14:39,779 --> 01:14:42,173 - Where are you gonna go? - Uh... 1677 01:14:42,173 --> 01:14:45,132 you know, I'm still kind of mulling that over. 1678 01:14:45,132 --> 01:14:47,221 I've actually thought about going home. 1679 01:14:47,221 --> 01:14:49,963 Some unfinished business with a, uh, 1680 01:14:49,963 --> 01:14:52,139 - sorcerer from hell. - Yeah, but 1681 01:14:52,139 --> 01:14:54,011 you can't go back in time. That's rule number one. 1682 01:14:54,011 --> 01:14:56,535 Uh, actually, that's... 1683 01:14:56,535 --> 01:14:59,233 How do I put--? That's not 100% true. 1684 01:14:59,233 --> 01:15:02,585 For, as far as genie rule number one, really, 1685 01:15:02,585 --> 01:15:04,717 you-you tell the boss that, you know, 1686 01:15:04,717 --> 01:15:06,806 time travel is out of the question 1687 01:15:06,806 --> 01:15:08,895 because it's, it's really dangerous. 1688 01:15:08,895 --> 01:15:10,941 So it's for your protection and also 1689 01:15:10,941 --> 01:15:14,161 'cause people make horrible decisions usually, so... 1690 01:15:14,161 --> 01:15:16,163 But, I mean, is it literally 1691 01:15:16,163 --> 01:15:18,905 out of the question? No. 1692 01:15:18,905 --> 01:15:20,559 It's not. 1693 01:15:20,559 --> 01:15:23,170 Right, so I could just wish you back home? 1694 01:15:23,170 --> 01:15:25,216 Well, I don't know, but, I mean, 1695 01:15:25,216 --> 01:15:28,001 I'm still kind of considering my options. 1696 01:15:28,001 --> 01:15:30,177 I mean, really, anything could happen. 1697 01:15:30,177 --> 01:15:32,745 You know, I could end up in Los Angeles with this guy. 1698 01:15:32,745 --> 01:15:34,834 -You know, just sitting by a pool. We don't, 1699 01:15:34,834 --> 01:15:36,836 we don't know, right? 1700 01:15:36,836 --> 01:15:40,100 Oh, you know what? I almost... 1701 01:15:40,100 --> 01:15:41,841 This is for you. 1702 01:15:41,841 --> 01:15:43,887 And I know I said 1703 01:15:43,887 --> 01:15:46,150 that your final three wishes 1704 01:15:46,150 --> 01:15:48,935 are entirely up to you, and that's-that's true, 1705 01:15:48,935 --> 01:15:52,156 but maybe consider this like a hint 1706 01:15:52,156 --> 01:15:55,028 at what one of the wishes could be. 1707 01:16:02,819 --> 01:16:04,385 So what's it mean? 1708 01:16:04,385 --> 01:16:06,562 We'll get to that in a minute. 1709 01:16:07,780 --> 01:16:10,043 Okay, I want to say something to you. 1710 01:16:10,043 --> 01:16:12,350 Uh... and 1711 01:16:12,350 --> 01:16:14,874 I just think it's important that you really hear me. 1712 01:16:14,874 --> 01:16:17,007 So years from now, 1713 01:16:17,007 --> 01:16:19,009 when you're old, 1714 01:16:19,009 --> 01:16:22,273 and gray, and probably doughy in the middle. 1715 01:16:22,273 --> 01:16:23,883 When you're sitting around 1716 01:16:23,883 --> 01:16:25,842 reading stories about my old pal, 1717 01:16:25,842 --> 01:16:27,757 JC, in-in your, 1718 01:16:27,757 --> 01:16:29,236 in your "Bibble" and-- 1719 01:16:29,236 --> 01:16:32,239 - It's Bible, but... - Whatever. 1720 01:16:32,239 --> 01:16:34,241 When you come to the phrase, 1721 01:16:34,241 --> 01:16:36,896 "The multitude gathered," 1722 01:16:36,896 --> 01:16:39,420 I want you to remember 1723 01:16:39,420 --> 01:16:42,423 that one of 'em found you 1724 01:16:42,423 --> 01:16:46,253 to be the very best friend that she'd ever had. 1725 01:16:47,428 --> 01:16:49,343 Okay? And, uh, 1726 01:16:49,343 --> 01:16:51,824 I never really trusted people because... 1727 01:16:51,824 --> 01:16:54,087 they're greedy and they're selfish. 1728 01:16:57,134 --> 01:16:59,049 But, Bernard, 1729 01:16:59,049 --> 01:17:02,139 that's not ever you. 1730 01:17:08,406 --> 01:17:11,191 This is all getting a bit too emotional. 1731 01:17:11,191 --> 01:17:13,846 I-I-I wish you'd just go. 1732 01:17:13,846 --> 01:17:16,196 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I was, I was just-- 1733 01:17:27,164 --> 01:17:28,948 - It's so weird. - I know. 1734 01:17:28,948 --> 01:17:31,908 I can't believe she just left. She just took off? 1735 01:17:31,908 --> 01:17:33,779 Well, I mean, she didn't so much as leave. 1736 01:17:33,779 --> 01:17:35,302 She sort of disappeared, you know? 1737 01:17:35,302 --> 01:17:36,956 I thought we had a, you know-- She didn't say, 1738 01:17:36,956 --> 01:17:38,305 she didn't say, she didn't say goodbye. 1739 01:17:38,305 --> 01:17:40,220 I know. It's a complicated situation. 1740 01:17:40,220 --> 01:17:42,440 The weird thing is she left this thing for me 1741 01:17:42,440 --> 01:17:44,790 and I-I can't make head nor tail of it. 1742 01:17:44,790 --> 01:17:47,358 - What? It's a number. - I know, but... 1743 01:17:47,358 --> 01:17:49,926 Maybe it's a... international phone number. 1744 01:17:49,926 --> 01:17:52,972 Yeah, that's a good idea actually. Like a plus four-four? 1745 01:17:52,972 --> 01:17:54,844 I don't know what that means. 1746 01:17:56,019 --> 01:17:58,021 We're sorry your call cannot be completed. 1747 01:17:58,021 --> 01:17:59,892 - No. - Oh! 1748 01:17:59,892 --> 01:18:02,199 It's a lottery number. She had a vision. 1749 01:18:02,199 --> 01:18:04,723 We're gonna be rich. 1750 01:18:04,723 --> 01:18:05,985 We'll just wait until the drawing. -Wait, hold on. 1751 01:18:05,985 --> 01:18:07,900 - Hold on. Pass me that pad. - What? 1752 01:18:07,900 --> 01:18:09,989 - This? - Yeah. 1753 01:18:14,385 --> 01:18:16,169 Oh, look at that. You're doing math. 1754 01:18:16,169 --> 01:18:19,172 I-- You never think you're gonna use it and then you... 1755 01:18:22,785 --> 01:18:25,135 You're a genius. I could kiss you. -What? 1756 01:18:25,135 --> 01:18:26,919 - What? What happened? - Good night. Good night! 1757 01:18:26,919 --> 01:18:28,225 Are we gonna win money? 1758 01:18:28,225 --> 01:18:30,706 Just let me wet my beak. 1759 01:18:32,446 --> 01:18:34,013 Flora, 1760 01:18:34,013 --> 01:18:36,059 my dear friend, 1761 01:18:36,059 --> 01:18:39,932 for the first of my last three wishes, 1762 01:18:39,932 --> 01:18:42,065 I wish 1763 01:18:42,065 --> 01:18:44,197 I was back to the very beginning. 1764 01:18:46,373 --> 01:18:48,898 ♪ Little darlin' 1765 01:18:48,898 --> 01:18:51,465 ♪ Don't you cry 1766 01:18:51,465 --> 01:18:56,209 ♪ You know I tried to be there with you by and by ♪ 1767 01:18:56,209 --> 01:18:59,865 ♪ When everything is goin' wrong ♪ 1768 01:18:59,865 --> 01:19:02,868 ♪ Now don't you cry 1769 01:19:02,868 --> 01:19:04,522 ♪ I'm wishin' 1770 01:19:05,566 --> 01:19:08,091 Bernard, this is Henry Hackford 1771 01:19:08,091 --> 01:19:10,267 of the Metropolitan Museum of Art. 1772 01:19:10,267 --> 01:19:11,964 Ah, yes. An honor to meet you, sir. 1773 01:19:11,964 --> 01:19:13,400 Nice to meet you, too. 1774 01:19:13,400 --> 01:19:15,228 I'd like you to take him through your new catalog. 1775 01:19:15,228 --> 01:19:17,448 Yes, of course. 1776 01:19:17,448 --> 01:19:19,842 I'd love to oblige, but I'm afraid 1777 01:19:19,842 --> 01:19:22,148 taking my daughter out for her birthday is far more important 1778 01:19:22,148 --> 01:19:25,412 than following the orders of a slimy, 1779 01:19:25,412 --> 01:19:28,372 nasty, seedy, supercilious, 1780 01:19:28,372 --> 01:19:31,244 gloating, ghastly, greedy rip-off merchant like you. 1781 01:19:31,244 --> 01:19:33,899 So goodbye. 1782 01:19:33,899 --> 01:19:35,814 Have a very Merry Christmas. 1783 01:19:35,814 --> 01:19:38,295 And, oh, of course, I quit. 1784 01:19:38,295 --> 01:19:41,515 But, hey, you can keep the ugly bear. - 1785 01:19:41,515 --> 01:19:45,041 ♪ I wish that everything 1786 01:19:45,041 --> 01:19:47,826 ♪ Was gold 1787 01:19:47,826 --> 01:19:50,437 ♪ I wish you 1788 01:19:50,437 --> 01:19:53,919 ♪ Were here to hold 1789 01:19:53,919 --> 01:19:57,836 ♪ I'm wishin' 1790 01:19:57,836 --> 01:20:02,058 ♪ Everything gold 1791 01:20:04,147 --> 01:20:06,497 ♪ Wishin' 1792 01:20:08,673 --> 01:20:13,199 ♪ Everything gold 1793 01:20:14,679 --> 01:20:16,855 ♪ Wishin' 1794 01:20:19,989 --> 01:20:23,557 ♪ Hold on to love, hold on to love. ♪ 1795 01:20:32,088 --> 01:20:33,437 Hey. 1796 01:20:36,005 --> 01:20:37,528 Hey. 1797 01:20:37,528 --> 01:20:39,530 You look beautiful. 1798 01:20:39,530 --> 01:20:41,314 What you trying to butter me up for? 1799 01:20:42,968 --> 01:20:44,883 I really didn't think you were gonna make it. 1800 01:20:44,883 --> 01:20:46,929 - No? - No. 1801 01:20:48,017 --> 01:20:49,540 Okay, too much mascara? 1802 01:20:49,540 --> 01:20:51,368 Do I look like an owl? 1803 01:20:52,543 --> 01:20:54,632 You look perfect. 1804 01:20:54,632 --> 01:20:57,026 - Bernie, what? 1805 01:20:58,549 --> 01:21:00,507 Thank you. 1806 01:21:00,507 --> 01:21:02,596 - What is this about? - Mm. 1807 01:21:04,207 --> 01:21:06,339 Mm. 1808 01:21:08,994 --> 01:21:11,040 Dad! 1809 01:21:11,040 --> 01:21:14,043 Oh, happy birthday, baby doll. 1810 01:21:25,750 --> 01:21:27,926 How was work? 1811 01:21:29,188 --> 01:21:30,624 I quit. 1812 01:21:30,624 --> 01:21:32,931 Excuse me? 1813 01:21:32,931 --> 01:21:35,934 Did you just say the thing that I have been dreaming 1814 01:21:35,934 --> 01:21:38,545 and-and hoping and needing you to say 1815 01:21:38,545 --> 01:21:41,418 for, I don't know, what seems like a lifetime? 1816 01:21:41,418 --> 01:21:43,028 I just figured I need to 1817 01:21:43,028 --> 01:21:44,943 spend a bit more time with my girls, you know? 1818 01:21:44,943 --> 01:21:46,553 And at last, finally pursue 1819 01:21:46,553 --> 01:21:48,947 that lifelong dream of a career in modeling. 1820 01:21:48,947 --> 01:21:50,601 Yeah, right. 1821 01:21:50,601 --> 01:21:53,386 I've been telling you, look at this face. 1822 01:21:53,386 --> 01:21:56,259 Oh, Bernie, that is such good news. 1823 01:21:57,782 --> 01:22:00,524 I was really getting worried that maybe someday 1824 01:22:00,524 --> 01:22:03,353 soon we'd have to... 1825 01:22:03,353 --> 01:22:05,311 Yeah, I know. 1826 01:22:05,311 --> 01:22:07,400 No, you don't. 1827 01:22:07,400 --> 01:22:09,925 Trust me, I do. 1828 01:22:17,019 --> 01:22:18,281 Where are we going? 1829 01:22:18,281 --> 01:22:21,110 Oh, yeah. I thought maybe 1830 01:22:21,110 --> 01:22:23,329 this year we could do something a little bit better 1831 01:22:23,329 --> 01:22:25,244 than skating, I thought we could take this divine, 1832 01:22:25,244 --> 01:22:27,594 this sophisticated young lady... -[screams] No! 1833 01:22:27,594 --> 01:22:30,162 Let me go. -...out to the finest restaurant in town. 1834 01:22:30,162 --> 01:22:32,295 Ooh. -Yeah, I mean, it's a very important birthday. 1835 01:22:32,295 --> 01:22:34,079 - She's actually eight. - Eight? 1836 01:22:34,079 --> 01:22:35,472 - You're actually eight, right? - I'm eight. 1837 01:22:40,042 --> 01:22:41,434 Uh, sorry, excuse me, sir. 1838 01:22:42,653 --> 01:22:44,611 Wow. What do you think, Eve? 1839 01:22:44,611 --> 01:22:46,396 - It's so cool. - Evening. 1840 01:22:46,396 --> 01:22:48,093 Um, do you have any spare tables? 1841 01:22:48,093 --> 01:22:51,009 Tonight? Do we have any spare tables tonight? 1842 01:22:53,316 --> 01:22:55,535 Oh. 1843 01:22:55,535 --> 01:22:57,276 I wish you did. 1844 01:22:59,278 --> 01:23:02,629 Well, it so happens that we do, sir. 1845 01:23:02,629 --> 01:23:05,284 Come this way. Table for three. 1846 01:23:05,284 --> 01:23:07,243 What did you do? 1847 01:23:07,243 --> 01:23:08,418 I've got this. 1848 01:23:08,418 --> 01:23:11,029 - You flexing, huh? 1849 01:23:11,029 --> 01:23:14,250 You know, I think I'm gonna go for the Cornish game hen. 1850 01:23:14,250 --> 01:23:16,556 Very good choice, sir. Madam? 1851 01:23:16,556 --> 01:23:19,168 Uh, if I could have the truffle salad 1852 01:23:19,168 --> 01:23:21,300 and, ooh, the steak tartare? 1853 01:23:21,300 --> 01:23:22,736 Certainly, madam. 1854 01:23:22,736 --> 01:23:24,477 And for you, young lady? 1855 01:23:24,477 --> 01:23:27,350 Peanut butter sandwiches and cherry ice cream, please? 1856 01:23:27,350 --> 01:23:29,700 I'm afraid we absolutely cannot serve anything 1857 01:23:29,700 --> 01:23:31,615 that is not on the menu. 1858 01:23:38,796 --> 01:23:40,798 - I wish you could. 1859 01:23:40,798 --> 01:23:44,758 However, seeing as you asked exceptionally nicely, 1860 01:23:44,758 --> 01:23:47,631 peanut butter sandwiches and cherry ice cream coming up, 1861 01:23:47,631 --> 01:23:49,372 mademoiselle. 1862 01:23:49,372 --> 01:23:50,808 And perhaps some french fries and a Coke float? 1863 01:23:50,808 --> 01:23:52,331 Thank you. 1864 01:23:52,331 --> 01:23:54,420 - Thank you. That is sweet. 1865 01:23:54,420 --> 01:23:56,161 Give me some birthday luck. 1866 01:23:56,161 --> 01:23:57,815 You know, 1867 01:23:57,815 --> 01:24:00,252 um, a little toast. 1868 01:24:02,385 --> 01:24:05,388 To my exquisite, 1869 01:24:05,388 --> 01:24:08,217 so-much-smarter-than-me wife. 1870 01:24:09,392 --> 01:24:12,351 And to our hilarious, now almost totally grown-up, 1871 01:24:12,351 --> 01:24:14,310 little girl 1872 01:24:14,310 --> 01:24:16,442 on her big birthday. 1873 01:24:17,400 --> 01:24:19,837 What more can a man ever wish for? 1874 01:24:22,318 --> 01:24:23,710 - Cheers. Cheers. 1875 01:24:23,710 --> 01:24:26,104 - Cheers. - ♪ Every day 1876 01:24:28,324 --> 01:24:31,762 ♪ Will be like a holiday 1877 01:24:34,330 --> 01:24:37,855 ♪ When my baby 1878 01:24:39,813 --> 01:24:44,253 ♪ When my baby comes home 1879 01:24:47,865 --> 01:24:50,433 ♪ Every day 1880 01:24:50,433 --> 01:24:52,739 ♪ Oh, yeah 1881 01:24:52,739 --> 01:24:55,786 ♪ Will be like a holiday 1882 01:24:55,786 --> 01:24:57,875 ♪ Oh, yes, it will 1883 01:24:59,268 --> 01:25:02,271 ♪ When my baby 1884 01:25:04,925 --> 01:25:08,625 ♪ When my baby comes home 1885 01:25:11,889 --> 01:25:14,892 ♪ Oh, every day 1886 01:25:16,720 --> 01:25:19,766 ♪ Will be like a holiday 1887 01:25:19,766 --> 01:25:23,379 ♪ Oh, yes, it will... 1888 01:25:23,379 --> 01:25:25,859 What do you say we order in for dinner? 1889 01:25:25,859 --> 01:25:28,514 I don't think either of us could be bothered to cook. 1890 01:25:28,514 --> 01:25:30,864 That's a great idea. Let me go out and get something. 1891 01:25:30,864 --> 01:25:33,563 Okay, but maybe we shouldn't do pizza from that place again. 1892 01:25:33,563 --> 01:25:35,826 Oh, come on, those are the best pizzas ever. 1893 01:25:35,826 --> 01:25:37,958 You know what? You're right. Get me that pizza 1894 01:25:37,958 --> 01:25:39,525 - and get it right now. - Yeah? 1895 01:25:39,525 --> 01:25:41,266 - Yes. Now. - Really? Mm. 1896 01:25:41,266 --> 01:25:43,355 - Mm. 1897 01:25:51,537 --> 01:25:53,409 Evening, Charles. 1898 01:25:53,409 --> 01:25:55,324 Evening, Mr. Bottle. 1899 01:26:02,766 --> 01:26:04,768 Lenny, how you doing? 1900 01:26:04,768 --> 01:26:06,639 I'm great, man. I'm living the dream. 1901 01:26:06,639 --> 01:26:08,467 What, are you kidding me? Beats wearing a uniform 1902 01:26:08,467 --> 01:26:10,948 and hailing cabs for jerks like you. 1903 01:26:10,948 --> 01:26:12,428 -What are you doing, you coming in? 1904 01:26:12,428 --> 01:26:13,603 - Yeah, thank you, Chef. - Oh, great. 1905 01:26:13,603 --> 01:26:15,344 Let me get that door for ya. 1906 01:26:15,344 --> 01:26:18,651 Oh, come on. -Come on, it's like old times, pal. 1907 01:26:18,651 --> 01:26:20,958 Hey, honey. 1908 01:26:20,958 --> 01:26:22,829 Give us a nice hot one. 1909 01:26:22,829 --> 01:26:24,788 Of course. 1910 01:26:24,788 --> 01:26:27,399 One perfect pepperoni for old Bernie boy. 1911 01:26:27,399 --> 01:26:29,662 I'm guessing you want extra pepperoni? 1912 01:26:29,662 --> 01:26:32,274 Yeah. Please. 1913 01:26:34,232 --> 01:26:37,322 Your wish is my command. 1914 01:26:37,322 --> 01:26:38,845 ♪ I wish I was a little bit taller ♪ 1915 01:26:38,845 --> 01:26:40,847 ♪ I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl ♪ 1916 01:26:40,847 --> 01:26:42,675 ♪ Who looked good, I would call her ♪ 1917 01:26:42,675 --> 01:26:44,721 ♪ I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat ♪ 1918 01:26:44,721 --> 01:26:46,592 ♪ And a six-four Impala 1919 01:26:46,592 --> 01:26:48,377 ♪ I wish I was like six-foot-nine ♪ 1920 01:26:48,377 --> 01:26:50,335 ♪ So I can get with Leoshi 1921 01:26:50,335 --> 01:26:51,945 ♪ 'Cause she don't know me but, yo, she's really fine ♪ 1922 01:26:51,945 --> 01:26:54,034 ♪ You know I see her all the time, everywhere I go ♪ 1923 01:26:54,034 --> 01:26:55,906 ♪ And even in my dreams, I can scheme ♪ 1924 01:26:55,906 --> 01:26:57,647 ♪ Of ways to make her mine 'cause I know ♪ 1925 01:26:57,647 --> 01:26:59,605 ♪ She's livin' phat, her boyfriend's tall ♪ 1926 01:26:59,605 --> 01:27:01,868 ♪ And he plays ball, so how am I gonna compete with that? ♪ 1927 01:27:01,868 --> 01:27:03,870 ♪ 'Cause when it comes to playing basketball ♪ 1928 01:27:03,870 --> 01:27:05,872 ♪ I'm always last to be picked and in some cases ♪ 1929 01:27:05,872 --> 01:27:08,005 ♪ Never picked at all, so I just lean up on the wall ♪ 1930 01:27:08,005 --> 01:27:10,399 ♪ Or sit up in the bleachers with the rest of the girls ♪ 1931 01:27:10,399 --> 01:27:12,052 ♪ Who came to watch their man ball ♪ 1932 01:27:12,052 --> 01:27:15,012 ♪ I confess it's a shame when you livin' in a city ♪ 1933 01:27:15,012 --> 01:27:17,275 ♪ That's the size of a box and nobody knows yo' name ♪ 1934 01:27:17,275 --> 01:27:18,972 ♪ Glad I came, to my senses 1935 01:27:18,972 --> 01:27:20,887 ♪ Like quick-quick, got sick-sick to my stomach ♪ 1936 01:27:20,887 --> 01:27:23,890 ♪ Overcometh by thoughts of me and her together, right? ♪ 1937 01:27:23,890 --> 01:27:25,892 ♪ So when I asked her out, she said I wasn't her type ♪ 1938 01:27:25,892 --> 01:27:28,895 ♪ I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller ♪ 1939 01:27:28,895 --> 01:27:31,507 ♪ I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her ♪ 1940 01:27:31,507 --> 01:27:33,683 ♪ I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat ♪ 1941 01:27:33,683 --> 01:27:35,641 ♪ And a six-four Impala 1942 01:27:35,641 --> 01:27:39,297 ♪ I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller ♪ 1943 01:27:39,297 --> 01:27:41,517 ♪ I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her ♪ 1944 01:27:41,517 --> 01:27:43,649 ♪ I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat ♪ 1945 01:27:43,649 --> 01:27:45,434 ♪ And a six-four Impala 1946 01:27:46,957 --> 01:27:50,700 ♪ I wish... I wish 1947 01:27:50,700 --> 01:27:52,876 ♪ I wish 1948 01:27:54,138 --> 01:27:57,924 ♪ I wish... I wish 1949 01:27:57,924 --> 01:28:00,013 ♪ I wish. 137449

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