All language subtitles for Catch Me If You Can

(CAR ENGINE REVVING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(GIRLS CHATTERING)

(ENGINE REVVING)

(YAWNS) A dollar says
it's Johnny Angel.

Too slow for a Monday.

Bet it's Great Balls of Fire.

No way. Any money says
it's Runaround Sue.

Aw, dude.
I hate Mondays.

Let's hope his finger's
heading for lucky 21.

Partly cloudy.

A little chilly.

Ah, it's a slow Monday.

Let's pick things up.

Lucky 21.

(ENGINES REVVING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

GIRL: Whoo!

(STUDENTS CHEERING)

BOY: Wow.

(SIGHS)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

JOHNSON: Now, even though
last Friday's game
ended in a 35-0 loss,

I wanna say to you fellas
that you put forth
a great effort.

A great effort.

Now, this year's
Fast Freddie dance

will be held one month
from Saturday.

This is the 30th anniversary
of his Twin City run.

So, get out of those
back-to-the-'50s clothes

and be there
or be square.

Now then,
a word from
your president and mine,

Melissa Hanson.

Thank you.

Well, gang,

we've made a profit of
$189 on the bake sale,

and $229 in the car wash.

(STUDENTS CHATTERING)
MELISSA: For a grand total
to date of exactly $19,000.

Now, we still have
$181,000 to go.

But we've got two months
to raise the rest.

So keep up the spirit.

The button sale's
gonna start today.

So I want all of you
to buy a button for yourselves

and sell the rest
to your parents.

(SNAPS FINGERS)

ALL: (CHANTING)
We can do it
Come on, man

We can do it
Yes, we can

Go Cathedral

Yay.

Thank you, girls.

Go Cathedral!
We can do it!

Over and out.

There's no way
we can do it.

Oh, you're doing great,
Melissa.

Not great enough.

Look, I know it's hard.

But we all love this school,
and we gotta keep pushing
so we don't lose her.

We're a small school,
so you've got to get
every single person involved.

You've gotta get
these cliques
joined together.

How? You know who came
to the car wash?

It was Nevil and me

and a couple of other guys
who had a choice between
that and going to detention.

The bake sale was just
my mom and me.

Well if these students
don't show they wanna
save their school,

then the school board
is not gonna come up
with the matching funds

and this place will close.

I'm gonna have
to do it all by myself.

God, we need a miracle.

(ENGINE REVVING)

Dirk, Manney.
The romance continues, I see.

Ah, piss off, Malone.

(SCOFFING)

Yeah, here's your 300.

And one...

Two...

Three hundred more.

Choke on it, jerkwad.

Hey, listen.
I feel good.
I feel lucky.

This Friday I wanna put
all 600 down on me.

Uh-huh.
To win.

Not with us, you ain't.

What do you mean?
"What do you mean?"

No more penny-ante
bullshit bets with
high school punks.

Starting this week,

we're moving into the city.

Working for the Fat Man.

You guys are working
for the Fat Man, huh?

You're moving up.

From now on,

we don't take no bets
less than three grand.

Hey, wait a minute.
You guys can't just
cut me off.

I mean, how am I
gonna make money, huh?

I got plans.
I'm going to...

Places. I'm going places.

Not no more.

Looks to me
like you're
going nowhere.

(DIRK LAUGHING)

Adios, shithead.

Aw, shit. School.

MONKEY: 35-nothing
with six fumbles
and four interceptions?

Aw, I mean, did we get
our asses kicked, or what?

I can't wait
till basketball season.

Yeah, then we'll only get our
asses kicked two points
at a time instead of seven.

Yeah, I guess
closing Cathedral won't
be such a bad thing.

Hey, Monkeywrench.
Where's your school spirit?

I gotta fly.
Hey.

You know, don't worry so much.
You'll find a way
to earn the money.

Thanks, Monkey.

BOY: Knock it off, butthead.
TEACHER: Sit down, right now.

BOY: Yeah,
he was cheating off me.

A-ha! Late again, Dylan.
What a surprise.

Mr. J. What's happenin'?
"What's happenin'?"

Hmm, I'd say about
three days of detention.
That's what's happenin'.

Oh, come on, guy.
I've got a great excuse.

Oh, let me guess.
The alarm didn't go off?
Car problems.

Dog ate your homework?
Dog ate your shoes?

Maybe a little bit
of the bubonic plague.

Sarcasm doesn't
suit you, Mr. J.

Guess I'll see you
in detention.

I got another idea.

Why don't you
help out with
the fund drive?

Yeah, well, I'm the only
fund drive I wanna help.

I'll take
the detention.
Now, look!

You wanna get nowhere fast?
Now, just keep it up.

I know where you're
coming from, believe it.

And this skipping school,
and racing and fighting
and scrounging around

is not gonna get you
where you wanna go.

You're a sharp egg, Dylan.

Now get yourself together
before you crack up.

Go see Melissa Hanson
after school.

That guy is hot.

He's a juvenile
delinquent and
a drag racer.

His idea of a great date
is probably making out
in the back seat of a car.

Like I said.
That guy is hot.

(CLEARING THROAT)

You only hurt
yourselves by cheating.

(WHISPERING) Absolutely right.
Absolutely...

Navel, you should move.

It's Nevil, and I...

Now.

Excuse me.

BOY:
We'll get you
for this, Navel.

Very nice.

Are you guys going
to the Fast Freddie dance?

I'm going dressed
as a greaser nerd.

All you need is the grease.

Whole thing's
a bunch of bullshit.
Uh-uh.

My dad saw the race.

You know Fast Freddie
won a solid gold trophy?

Well, obviously your father
has the facts misconstrued.

My mother said
the trophy was filled
with diamonds.

Possibly jewel-encrusted.

(LAUGHING)
Bullshit, Navel.

No, she told me.
She told me he sold his car
for half a million dollars.

Bullshit.
No way, Navel.

The car vanished
seconds after the run.
It was never seen again.

Come on, Manney.

Just a couple races.

You need money
so bad, kid, huh?
For your big plans?

Find yourself three grand
and give me a call.

Jerkwad.

(DIAL TONE)

350 Chevy, bored and blown.

Hey, Dylan,
what do you think?

Fast Freddie
and the Twin City run
a myth or what?

No, he's real.
He did it.

Then him and his car
vanished forever.

If he wasn't real,
he should've been.

Hey, Monk. I thought you
said you were gonna stop.

Now...
Whoa, whoa, whoa...

Explain that to your mom.
She'll get you to quit.

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.
(CLEARING THROAT)

Hey, Navel.
Hey.

Uh, listen, Mr. J. said
you were gonna help out
with the fund drive.

Are you gonna help us?
I mean, are you gonna help us?

Oh, sure, Navel.
I'll save the day.

Rescue the
damsel in distress.

She just has
to meet my price.

Look, I don't care
what Melissa Hanson
has to say.

There is no way that she's
gonna make that kind of money
in less than two months.

We, we, we are gonna make it.
Everyone should be helping.

Listen, Stackowski,
why don't you just shut up
until your brain kicks in?

MONKEY: Here he goes.

(STACKOWSKI YELLING)

(STUDENTS CHEERING)

JOHNSON: (OVER P.A.) Today's
detention will be held in the
Home Economics classroom.

See you all bright and early
tomorrow morning.

Hey, don't put so much!
Wait a minute!
You're gonna waste it, see?

No, no. It's crust first,
filling second.

Oh, that's very
mature. This is great.

What are you in for?

Smoking in the
bathroom. You?

Killing a freshman.

Hey, come on.
Fight!

What?

What do you want?

I'm here to help
the fund drive.

Oh, great.
(GLASS SHATTERING)

Stop it.

All right!

(KNOCKING)

Let us get organized here.

Thanks.

Navel.

Take over.

Now...

(STUDENTS LAUGHING)

That's really funny.
This is like a new tie.

Whoa. Oh, wait.
Let me take those.

Uh...
Yeah.

By the way,

I have a nifty little idea
for our fundraiser.

MELISSA: What?

That's your
nifty little idea?

Bet the school's money
on a car race?
Yeah.

No chance.

It's your only chance.
It's illegal.

It's illegal, immoral.
Completely off the wall.

So what?
"So what?"

I'll have you know
I intend to be a lawyer
some day.

And a politician
after that.
All the more reason.

Listen, the fund drive
is doomed.

Everyone is burned out
on car washes,
bake sales and bingo.

Bingo worked!

School board has
finally given up on trying
to keep this place afloat.

They have not.

Face it. Small high schools
are like the corner grocer.
They're dying fast.

I'm not gonna let
Cathedral die.

When I ran for president,
I promised I would
save this place.

And I never break a promise.

Then you'd better
deal with me.

Because if you're
gonna save this place,
you're gonna have to get mean.

And when it comes
to being mean, I'm a pro.

Please.
I'm not afraid of you.

You actually drive
this thing in public?

Thanks for
all your "advice."

If you have any
other suggestions, ideas...

Thanks anyway.

You're not gonna make
that kind of money
selling pies, you know.

Right.

Stubborn wench.

(ENGINE REVVING)

(TRAIN HORN HONKING)

(TRAIN HONKING)

(HONKING CONTINUES)

(TWO TRAINS HONKING)

(TRAINS CLATTERING)

Shut up!

(GAVEL THUDS)

MELISSA: Okay, please
review the yellow sheets
that I've just handed out.

Any contributions would be
greatly appreciated.

Later, Nevil.

Now, we just need
one great idea.

A way to make
a lot of money,
and fast.

Does anyone
have any ideas?

Later, Nevil.

Look, the school board is only
gonna put up the matching
funds if we can prove to them

that we really wanna
save this place.

At the moment,
we're not doing that.

Oh, Melissa.
Are you going
to go to the dance?

I mean, you organized
the damn thing.

And my ugly little brother
needs a date. So, I just
thought you might want...

I don't believe
you people.

Do you even care
about this place?

Do you care
if it closes down?

Don't you understand?

You're gonna get split up
from your friends,
get bussed into the city,

and end up in
monster schools
like Westside.

You're the president.

You're the one who said
you could save our home,
remember?

Yes, I remember.

But I can't do it
all by myself.

Well, you should've
told us that
before we voted for you.

No time for fund drives.
We got sports and shit.

We've got
a show to put on.
Shakespeare, you know.

There's Homecoming.

Then there's
the pageant.

Band practice.
Recitals. More practice.
More recitals.

Don't you see?
If Cathedral closes

there won't be
any of that stuff!

Oh, whoa, whoa.
Mel, chill out, babe.

After all,
it's only high school.

Hey!

We're teenagers.
High school is all we've got.

Oh, you wipe
that smile off
your face, mister.

Hey, if we end up
in schools like
Billington or Westside...

In schools that big,
you girls won't be
nearly as popular.

So what do you say?
You want to help me out
on Friday night?

BOTH: I got a date.

You have a date. Right.

(SIGHS)

(GAVEL THUDS)
(SPLASHING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

BOY: Here, over here.

BOY:
Knock it off,
you butthead.

Hello?

I was just thinking.

There's a chance
I just may be willing,

uh, to reconsider.

Or perhaps...

No, no,
make a small wager.

All for the good
of the school, of course.

The offer's closed.

Excuse me?
Closed.

You had your chance.

You didn't take the shot.

You snooze, you lose.

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

Listen, it was
your stupid idea
in the first place.

You can't back out
on me now.

You want everyone
to think you're chicken?

Ooh! Child psychology!

Gosh, I don't want anybody
to think I'm chicken.

Okay, you win.

We do a deal.

Really?

How does it work?

You give me the money.
I give it to the sharks.

I win the race
and you double your money.

Minus a few incidental
expenses, of course.

Expenses?
Yeah.

What expenses?
How much?

I've got insurance.

Tire rubber.

Fifty percent.
What?

Fifty percent?
Okay.

It's for a good
cause, uh...

Thirty percent.
No.
Five percent.

Oh, no way
five percent.

Twenty percent.
Six percent.

(GIRLS SHRIEKING)
You don't understand,
I went down 10.

You only went up one.
Ha! Seven percent.

That's not fair.
Fifteen.
Eight.

Fourteen.
Nine.

Thirteen.
GIRL: What are you doing
in here?

Look at me when
I'm yelling at you!
Thirteen!

You already
said thirteen.
GIRL: Get outta here, Malone.

I'm missing it.
Nine.

You already said that.

Thanks. A lifelong
fantasy blown.

Thank you.

Ten.
Eleven.

Ten.
Eleven.

Ten!
Eleven.

Ten. Ten!
Eleven. Eleven.

Ten.
Eleven!

Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Shh.
Just calm down.

What's going on
here, Dylan?

I'm just
trying to help
the fund drive.

You asked me
to help the fund drive,
I'm trying to help.

I'm just trying
to help, right?

He's just trying
to help.

See?
I'm trying to help.

She won't let me.
What?

(STAMMERING)
Melissa, Melissa.
Now just... Look, just...

Calm down.

Remember, I told you.
You can't do this
on your own.

We're gonna
need everybody.

Ten.
Eleven.

Ten.

Deal.

Deal.
Ha ha!

There, that's
the spirit.

All right, now go out
and get 'em.

(GRUNTING)

Good.

I can't believe
you talked me
into this.

We tortured you
into this, Navel.

It's Nevil.
Nevil, Nevil, Nevil.
Always Nevil.

Please, could you
slow down just a little bit?

Just slow down.
Look, as school treasurer,
I am entrusted under oath

to be financially
responsible.

Now, what could be more
financially responsible

than betting the school's
money on a sure thing?

The signature! The signature
did not look anything
like Mr. Johnson's.

Will you give me a break?
I'm not a forger.

It was close enough
to get us the money,
was it not?

Fine! Fine, we're all
gonna end up in jail,
that's great!

Shut up, Navel!
Just shut up.

This is gonna work.
Don't worry.

I'm not worried.
They're not worried.

Nobody's worried.

Should we be worried?

What's to worry?

You just stole
$3,000 from your
high school,

about to bet it on
an illegal car race.

No worries.

MANNEY: So, Malone.

Who's your backer?

She is.

The jerkwad's got
himself a sugar mama.

(DIRK LAUGHING)

MANNEY: Well, lady,
if he doesn't work out,

could I interest you
in a much larger package?

Nice guys, huh?
Hand it over, Navel.

Who's that?
Your lawyer?

(DIRK LAUGHING)
DYLAN: Come on.

All right, let's
get on with it.

Here's the three grand.

Don't get too attached.

He's waiting for you
at the other end.

Who is it?

The Sandman.

Oh, right.
The Sandman.

What, I've blown him out,
uh, three, four times?

Tell me another one.

What, he didn't tell you
we raced before?

Rockfield run, Melker run,
St. Cloud run.

I beat him
every time.

He didn't tell you?

(LAUGHING)

We, uh, never raced the
Sandman, did we?

No.
No.

Never.
Right.

Now you can worry.

Navel, you stay
here with her.

It's Nevil.
If you lose,
run me over, will ya?

Yeah, I will.

Sandman's gonna
pay for this, man.

Don't worry, Dirk.
He's trying to
bait us, man.

(ENGINE STARTING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(ENGINE REVVING)

Well, he seems
nice enough.
Yeah.

Yeah.
Yeah.

Have fun.
Thanks, Monkey.

(ENGINES REVVING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Yeah, yeah.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Come on!

Damn, this guy is good.

All right, let me
get this straight.

You're saying
that craps gives you
better odds

than any other
board or wheel game.

Scram, pinhead.

You bother me.

Not bad, Sandman.
Not bad.

(SIRENS WAILING)

Whoops!

(TIRES SCREECHING)

What's taking
them so long?

If they crash,
do we get
our money back?

Do you want it
in the chops, Navel?

Come on.
Come on!

Let's get it on!
Come on!

Yeah!
Let's go for it!

(SIRENS WAILING)

I can make it.

I can make it.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

I'm not gonna make it.
Aw, shit!

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Whew.

Son of a bitch.

(SHRIEKING)

(MELISSA SHRIEKING)

(SHRIEKING)

Yeah!

(HUMMING)

Where the hell's
the Sandman?

I lost him on a curve.

Check your local
Gray Bar Motel.

Pay up, boys.

(TRAIN SCREECHING)

Nice place.

Oh, thanks.

Thanks for everything.

I got my cut.

Yeah, you got your cut.

So, um...

Where do you live?

I live in a mansion.

No.

I live in
a little place
with my uncle Jake.

It's cool.
He does his thing
and I do mine.

Mmm.
Hey, listen.

You got the guts
to go for it again?

I don't know.
Double your money again.

Well, we need
the money, but...
Are you scared?

No, it's just that...
You don't trust me.

Look, it worked
once, but...

All right.
All right, let's do it.

But just one more time.

All right.
That's it.

Okay.
Just one more.

I'll set it up.

Okay.

MELISSA: (OVER P.A.)
All right. Now we're
really starting to roll.

This past weekend,
our button sale
made a profit...

(ALL CLAMORING)
...of $3,000.

Over and out.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

God!

(CHEERING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(GRUNTS)

(INAUDIBLE)

And this week, our candy bar
sales made a profit of...

$12,000.

(ALL CHEERING)

I can't believe
they're buying this
crapola. Ow!

It's going so well,
I can't believe it.

I almost don't believe it.

Should I believe it?

Sure.

Why not?

After all, you were the one
that said all I had to do was
to get everyone to work

together and I could
pull this thing off.

You know what?
You were right.

Ooh! You were
absolutely right. Bye.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Oh! Oh! Oh, my God.

Come on, baby.
Come on, baby.

Come on. Come on!

Come on, come on,
come on, come on. Yes, yes!

Come on! Come on!

Come on! Come on!

Whoo! That's it!
We're halfway there.

(ENGINE REVVING)

Lose the
smile, dirtbag.

The Fat Man
wants to have
a word with you.

Be there.

I'll give your cash
to the nerd.

We're halfway there.
(CHUCKLES)

Yeah.

(CHUCKLES)

Uh, Dylan?

Uh, Melissa?

Never mind.

No, I'm sorry. What?

It was a great race.

No, no, no. You were
gonna say something.
What were you gonna say?

It's no big deal.
I was just...

I was, you know,
wondering if...

I was just wondering if,
if you wanted to go to the
Fast Freddie dance with me.

A date?

No, it's not a date.

Look, it's just a silly dance.

And if you don't
want to go, it's okay.
You know, it's...

It's just, I organized it,
so I was thinking
that I might go, and...

Sure, I'll go.
Forget it.

Okay, I won't go.
No.

What? Do I go
or don't I go?

No, you go.

I mean.
I'd like you to go.

We go.

Okay.

Here's your cut, Dylan.
You need a receipt?
(LAUGHS)

Don't spend it all
in one place.

Oh, yeah.
Uh, I'll just
wait in the bug.

That's where
I'm gonna be.

Thanks, Navel.

NEVIL: It's Nevil.

I guess I better
get going, too.

See you later.

Bye.

(RUNAWAY PLAYING)

(STUDENTS CHEERING)

All right. Let's cut through
all the bull, uh, nonsense

and get straight
to the nitty-gritty.

Take it away, Melissa.

Thanks, Mr. J.

All right, gang.

This week our pottery
and painting sale made
a profit of $24,000.

For a grand total
of $100,000.

(ALL CHEERING)

I gotta get to class.

Bye, Mr. J.

Uh, Melissa...

Listen, I've been meaning
to say something about
this for some time.

Everything has been
very exciting and I want
this place to stay open

as much as
anyone else, but...

I smell trouble.

And $80,000 in one month

smells like a hell
of a lot of trouble.

There's no trouble. I mean,

finally everybody's working.

You know, all the guys
on the football team are
being an amazing help,

and cheerleaders,
and the band.
School spirit!

I'm really glad to be
a part of this place.

Bye.
Uh, Melissa.

I'm not buying that anymore.

And we'll get down
to the bottom of this later,

but right now,
I'm looking at a
potentially bigger problem.

Bigger problem? I, I mean,
you have a bigger problem?

Yes. The school board
has decided to move
their meeting forward.

They're gonna be
getting together
this Saturday morning.

What?

That wasn't supposed
to happen for another month!

Now calm down.
Nothing's been decided.

How can you tell me
to calm down?

You know as well as I do,

the school board's been trying
to close Cathedral for years.

What this means is that
they've already decided.

I know, I know.

Well, no.

There's nothing final yet.

They gave us a chance...
They gave us until next month.

Just calm down, girl.
I'm on your side, you know.
And I'll be at the meeting.

I'm gonna fight for more time.

I'm gonna tell them
how well you kids are doing

and how much money
you've raised.

Now come on.
We still have a chance.

That chance is to go
double or nothing.

"Double or nothing."
Are you nuts?

Look, the way I see it,
if we don't raise
all the money right away,

the board is gonna
close the school.

What have we
got to lose?

Oh, 100 grand.

Hey, babe.
Great work
you've been doing.

You must be selling
a shitload of pies.

Anyways, the football team
needs some new equipment.
Here's a list.

We figure once you get
the money to save the school,

you can maybe keep on working
and spend the rest of the
money on the team.

Catch you later, babe.

(SCOFFS)

Listen. Mr. J. is
already suspicious.

Now what do you think's
gonna happen

if you suddenly come up
with the whole 200 grand, huh?

I think everyone's gonna be
too excited to care
where the money came from.

Melissa? Hey, Mel?

Hi. I'm sorry we haven't
been attending all the
fundraisers, but...

You're doing so well, and...

Well, we need new
cheerleading uniforms.

And you'll work it out
with Mr. J, right?

And any leftover
money goes to us?

Okay. Thanks, Mel.
Keep up the good work.

(SIGHS)

BOY: Knock it off,
you butthead!

Now let's just think about
this for a moment, okay?

Hey, Melissa. We need new
costumes and props.

The band gets first shot
at any extra money,
right, Melissa?

(SIGHS)
The brass section could really
use the bucks.

Brass my ass.
What have you done
for the fund drive? Nothing!

(BOTH ARGUING INDISTINCTLY)

You see? Nobody knows
where the money's coming
from and nobody cares.

Just as long as
they get their cut.

Besides, if we raise
that kind of money,

you think Mr. J.'s
gonna make us give it back?

No way.

You think you got it all
figured out, don't you?

Look, we've had it
easy until now.

On a bet like that,
they're gonna get mean.

Hey, when it comes
to being mean,
you're a pro, remember?

Come on, what do you say?

NEVIL: All right, you guys.

Look, Monkey just told me
Mr. J. wants to see the books.

You don't expect
me to run and hide
from the principal, do you?

Oh, yeah. Right, right.
That's gonna be really easy.

Look, tell me.
What am I supposed to do?
What am I supposed to do?

Please, Dylan.

(SIGHS)

I guess you're gonna
have to keep running, Navel.

It's Nevil. I hate my life.

I think you better
wait here.
I won't be long.

I'm coming with you.

These are not
nice people, Melissa.

Socially, they're
really not your type.

(SIGHS)

Just let me do
the talking, okay?

Hi, guys. Nice evening.
Whoa, ho, ho, ho, ho.

No minors
allowed, shithead.

Hey, I been here before.
A couple times.

This is Dylan Malone.

He's here to see
the Fat Man.

Yeah.
Why don't you check
your guest list?

All right. He's on here.

I'm on there.

Oh!

Use the side door.

Now, look. This guy
doesn't mess around.

Just let me do the talking.
(SCOFFS) You just said that.

That worked out
really well.

PHATMUN: Yeah.

Well...

Dylan Malone.
And his sugar mama.

(LAUGHS) I see we are
all old friends.

Please be seated.

I'm Johnny Phatmun.

(SCOFFS) Johnny Phatmun.

Also known as the Fat Man.

Right.

This is Melissa Hanson.
Pleasure.

Likewise.

Now down to business.

I'm the largest
gambling conglomeration
in the Twin Cities.

I bet on anything that moves.

And you, Mr. Malone,
move faster than most
anything I bet on.

This is a mistake, boss.

I wanna take this guy.

Oh, Manney, sit down now. Sit!

Now, you've consistently
beaten the drivers

that my boys have
thrown up against you.

Now it's not the money
that I mind losing.

You barely won a bit of
pocket change, nothing more.

You see, it's just that
I hate losing at all.

Only losers lose,
and I'm not a loser.

I resent losing!

Therefore,

I've decided that
you will drive

for me instead of
against me.

You'll be paid a percentage
of the gross

of all the races you win.

That sounds great.

Hey, it beats
a kick in the teeth.

(CHUCKLES)

Well, listen, I...
I'll have to think
about it a bit.

The decision has
already been made.

Now you may go.
You'll be contacted later.

(CLEARS THROAT)
Excuse me, Mr. Phatmun.

But he works for me.

I'm his backer.
He races for me.

If you want him
to race for you,

well, then you're going
to have to take him
away from me.

Dirk!

I didn't mean physically.

(CHUCKLES) Hold on, Dirk.
I was just kidding.

(LAUGHS)

Now, now, now,
what is it you're trying
to propose, little lady?

(SIGHS)

(CLEARS THROAT) Another race.

For $100,000.

Now, if you win, you can have
all your money back
and be his new backer.

Wouldn't hurt.

Win the money back
before he starts
driving for me.

Little lady, we have a deal.

The Slaughterhouse run.
Saturday.

You'll be there with the
$100,000 before it starts.

Right. Slaughterhouse run?

Yeah. Okay, uh, listen,
Mr. Phatmun, I've beaten every
decent driver you've got.

Who you gonna
throw at me now?

DYLAN: The Widowmaker.
Great. Just great.

MELISSA: So what?

DYLAN: The Fat Man
must've brought him
over from Detroit.

MELISSA: So what?

DYLAN: He's never been
beaten, that's what.

Total killer. Dude lives
up to his name.

MELISSA: Oh, great.
Just great.

(HORN HONKING)

Hey, guys.
Hey, Nevil.

Mr. Phatmun.
Good luck.

I won't need it.

(CHUCKLES)
Nice hairdos,
meat bags.

What's with
the get-ups?

We're going to the
Fast Freddie dance,
aren't we, guys?

Yeah, it's a
back-to-the-'50s dance.

Hey, you guys could
come if you want.

A dance to honor
Fast Freddie?

He won the Twin City run.
Greatest driver ever.

He went to Cathedral,
same as us.

Fast Freddie, huh?

Well, let's get with it.

With such large stakes,
I feel compelled to make
a personal appearance.

Likewise.

Let's get down
to business.

I'm gonna
eat you alive.

And I'm gonna
regurgitate you, and
I'm gonna eat you again.

(SCOFFS) Let's do it.

(ENGINE REVVING)

Come on, baby.
We can do it.

Hey, you can't do that.

It's dinner time, Malone.

What are you doin'?

Asshole.

Son of a bitch.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(GRUNTS)

Now for the big kill.

Hey! What?

Yeah! Whoa! (LAUGHS)

Thanks for the fun, folks.

Tell Mr. Malone to come
see me when he's
well enough. (LAUGHS)

You blame this
all on me, don't you?

No. No, I don't blame
this all on you.

(MELISSA SNIFFLING)

Oh, no. Not that.
Shit.

Look, I'll take the heat.

Just tell everyone
I stole the money.
They'll believe that.

No.

I knew exactly what I was
getting myself into.

I made up my own mind.

(SIGHS) I just
went too far.

I made a mistake,
and I'm gonna have
to pay for it.

Screw it. I'll take the blame.

No. I deserve the blame.

I'm gonna take it.

Fine. Great. Be that way.
Miss Rah-Rah.

Stoic to the bitter end.
Chin up, head held high...

Well, you're not gonna
make me feel guilty.

I'm not trying to make
you feel guilty.

But I'm going to leave now,
before you say something that
we're both going to regret.

You did a great job, Dylan.

I really appreciate it.

Thank you.

Look, if we wouldn't have
tried, the school would've
closed down anyway.

Yeah, well, I got my cut.

Yeah, you got your cut.

Oh...

Good job, Malone.

Hey, where you going, Melissa?
Hey, Rick.

Come on. Let's go on in.
That's sweet of you. But, no.

I, I really don't want to go
to the dance right now.

No, I, I... Really...

Oh, come on.
It'll be fun.

(BAND PLAYING AT THE HOP)

I enjoyed being an
obnoxious nerd.

Do you think they have
nerds in prison?

We're going to take
a little break now. Thank you.
Thank you very much.

Thank you.
(CROWD CHEERING)

Thank you, guys and Donna.

Let me have
your attention, please.

Come on up.
I want to make
an announcement.

Well, gang, it's been
a long, hard road.

You've all done a great job
and I am very proud of you.

As you may know,
there was a school board
meeting this morning.

The main topic of discussion
was the impending closure
of Cathedral High.

Now, I told them how hard
you've all been working

and that your fundraising
has resulted in a profit
of $100,000.

(SCATTERED CHEERS)

And do you know
what they said?

Do you know what they said?

They said, "That's great.
That's terrific!"

And they gave us an extension.

(CROWD CHEERING)

So now...

Now...

All we have to do is
give them the $100,000
that we've already earned

and they'll give us
to the end of the school year
to come up with the rest.

So let's hear it
for Cathedral High!
(ALL CHEERING)

We had it.

Now...

BOY: Kickass, Mr. J.!

Now, let's give a big hand
to the little lady
who put it all together.

Melissa Hanson, come on down!

Um... (CLEARS THROAT)

I really love this school.

'Cause it's mine.

I spent four years
of my life here.

I would've done anything
to save this place.

Anything!

Only I couldn't convince
you to feel the same way.

I guess I'm not the leader
I thought I was.

I couldn't...
I couldn't lead you...

(SIGHS) And so I gave up
and tried to do
it all by myself.

Only I failed.

I'm, I'm really sorry.

There is no $100,000.

There is no money.

I'm really sorry.

(SOFTLY) I'm sorry.

What do you mean,
there's no money?

Uh, um...

GIRL: You mean it
was all just a big lie?

What the hell
did you do with it?

(ALL CLAMORING)

Melissa?

(SIGHS)

(ENGINE REVVING)

Hey!

Hey, what are you doing?

Dylan's up to something crazy.
I gotta stop him. Or help him.

Dylan can help himself.

Oh, yeah? Well, I don't
think he can this time.

(SCOFFS)
What, are you gonna follow him
around the rest of your life?

No, I'm not.
He's my friend.

Let him go.
He's got what
he wants.

He's got his cut.

No. No, no, no, no, no.
This is what he wants.
And he's throwing it away.

College postcards?

He wants to go to college?

Jeez, Melissa, I guess you
got him figured wrong.

You think he wants to spend
the rest of his life here,
hanging out on the streets?

Draggin' for cash?
Yeah, right.

I know where he's going.

Move over.

Hello, Fat Man.

Mr. Malone.
Get bored at the dance,
or feeling too low to go?

You cheated me.

I want a rematch.

Don't, Dylan.

You don't have to do
this for me.

Do this for you?

Melissa, don't kid
yourself. I drive cars.

I mean, what the hell
else am I gonna do?

You've got a future.
What about all these?

What about college?

What do you say, Johnny?
Dylan...

You got the guts?

Why should I?
What's in it for me?

Eight thousand
bucks. My cut.

It's yours.
If you agree to a rematch.

And if I lose,
I'll be your driver.

I'll race for
you for nothing.

You keep my winnings
until the race is
paid off in full.

Plus interest?

Yeah, plus interest.
Dylan, don't.

You'll end up
working for him for years.

Young lady,
I am a fair man.

I'll race anyone you want.
Any run you say.

(CHUCKLES) Thirty years.

Fall into my lap. (SCOFFS)

Okay.

I'm free Friday evening.
We'll do it then.

You race all by yourself.

What do you mean, by myself?

Against the clock.

You got 20 minutes
to run 20 miles.

The Twin City run.
You start at Lake George.

Then you race straight
through the city
to the football stadium.

Finish under
the Cathedral goalposts.

It'll be a big feather
in your cap.

Only one other
person's ever done it.

Your Fast Freddie.

I want something else.
What else?

The jukebox.

BOTH: The jukebox?

Our jukebox?

Cathedral's jukebox?

That's right.

No jukebox, no deal.

DYLAN: Why the jukebox?

I have my reasons.

We'd have to steal it.

Such is life.

We could get it during
the football game.

(SOFTLY) Oh, great.

It has to be in
our possession as collateral
before the run is half over.

I figured you were here,
Malone. I found your two
boyfriends out in the alley.

God! What the hell?
Are we holding the dance here?

Come on, Dirk. Relax.

(GRUNTS) Thank you, Dirk.

Okay, Fat Man.

If I gotta do
the Twin City run,

and with those stakes,
then you can give me odds.

Two to one odds.
It's like you said.
You're a fair man.

I admire your bravado,
young man.

Fair enough.

You win, you get $200,000.

But if I win,

I get your money...

The jukebox...

And you.

Dylan...

Deal.

This is nuts.

The Twin City run
and Fast Freddie
are stupid myths.

Fat Man seems
to believe it.

He's tricked you, Dylan.

Look, it was really
noble what you did,
but nothing is more...

Is more important
than saving
the school, right?

I didn't say that.
You didn't have to.

Listen, I am in it now.
To the hilt.

Why don't you just...

What?

Just go home, Melissa.

PHATMUN: I've waited
a long time for this.

There's a very slim chance
he can actually do it.

There must be no chance.

He does have
the fastest car
in the city.

Then deal with it.

BOY 1: I heard she just lied
so people would like her.

The fund drive
never had a dime.

GIRL 1: I heard she
stole it and put it in
a Swiss bank account.

GIRL 2: After all that
work everyone did,
and she screws up.

BOY 2: I heard
she left the country.

GIRL 3: How did
she get in charge?

I could've gotten enough
money to save this place easy.

BOY 2: She was a lousy
president. And now she's...

(GRUNTS)
(LOCKER CLATTERING)

JOHNSON: (OVER P.A.)
Will Dylan Malone please come
to the principal's office?

Now. Thank you.

NEVIL: It wasn't me, Dylan.
I swear. I swear
I didn't say a word.

Okay. Okay. Okay.
I, I talked, but I
didn't tell him everything.

I held back. I promise.

Has Melissa
come to school yet?

No.

Her mother says she
hasn't been out of
her room since Saturday.

Her phone's been ringing
off the hook.

Every kid in school's
trying to call her.

She says that their tone
is not very friendly.

Now what the hell happened?

So, they blame it
all on her, huh?

You want to know
what happened?

I'll tell you
what happened.

What happened was
Melissa Hanson was busting
her ass to save this place

and no one was
willing to help her.

DYLAN: (OVER P.A.)
She organized every
fund drive in the book.

She went by the book.

Nobody cared.
Nobody helped.

Finally, she knew she had
to do something desperate
to save this place.

So I talked her into taking
the school's money, and...

Betting it on a car race.

What?

What?
What?

What?
What?

Yeah.

She bet the money,
I drove the car.

And we won. And won, and won.

And the money rolled in.
And, man, when the money
started rolling in,

everyone wanted their cut.

New cheerleading uniforms.
New football gear.

Costumes and props.
Band equipment.

College tuition.

Then we got cheated.
Lost it all.

Now everyone
is pointing fingers.

Blaming Melissa
for everything.

To do what she did
and to take all the blame,

you know what
kind of guts that took?

She believed in this school,
and it stabbed her
in the back.

And when this school closes,
every single person
in it is going to lose.

It's like they say.
You never know what
you've got until you lose it.

Well, we'll know.

(ALL MURMURING INDISTINCTLY)

(MURMURING STOPS)

Melissa,

we know what you did,

and we know what we did.

Or didn't do.

GIRL: We haven't
been very nice,

or very helpful.

Actually, we've been
complete jerks.

BOY: We've blown it.
We know it.

Is there anything
we can do about it?

Melissa, we're sorry.
Please. Don't quit on us.

I'd never break a promise.

And we still have
one more chance.

The Twin City run?

It's our only chance.

Oh, come on, Dylan.

All that
Fast Freddie stuff
and the Twin City run

is just some
teenage tale.

It's a silly legend.

Now, come on.
Let's get serious.

I am serious.

You got two choices,
Mr. J.

You tell the school board
what happened

and Melissa goes to jail.

Probably Nevil and myself.

Only I'd run.

And the school closes.

For good. For ever.

Or...

Don't tell 'em.

Let me give it a try.

Maybe save the school.
Lah-dee-dah.

(CHUCKLES)

I oughta punch you
right in the nose.

Somebody ought to,
but let me do
what I gotta do first.

Look, I'd like
to help, Dylan.

But I can't.

(LOUD RUMBLING)

What?

TEACHER: Okay,
everybody out. Let's go.
(STUDENTS COUGHING)

Everybody out, let's go.

Everybody out.

(COUGHING)

The Fat Man.

What?

Not what. Who.

A guy called the Fat Man.

Johnny Phatmun.

That's who has our money.

That's who I gotta beat
to get it back.

This car was
our last chance.

MELISSA:
Let me through.
I'm the president!

NEVIL: I'm the treasurer!

(SOFTLY) Oh, my God.

Even my gloves.

(IT'S ONLY MAKE BELIEVE
PLAYING)

Get up. Get something to
dig with and follow me.

Did you hear
what I said?
Get up.

Get something to
dig with and follow
me. Now.

JOHNSON: Thirty years ago,
there was a barn out here.

Ninety-eight,
ninety-nine,
one hundred.

And under the barn
was a feed cellar.

And only the farmer
and the farmer's son knew
about the feed cellar.

Here. One, two, three.

Right here.

Start digging
right here.

Here. That's it.

Right under here.

All right.
Here it goes.
Here it goes.

(GRUNTING)

(LAUGHING)

Fast Freddie's car.

JOHNSON:
The farmer's son was...

Mr. F. Johnson.

Fred Johnson?
Fast Freddie Johnson?

No way.
(LAUGHING)

Well, how do you think
Fast Freddie's car vanished?

You did the
Twin City run.
JOHNSON: That's right.

Because of a bet I had
with Johnny Phatmun.

All right, now wait a minute.
I heard you won
a solid gold trophy.

I heard it was
full of diamonds.
No, no.

Johnny had a beer bar.

It was called
Phatmun's Place.

So, what'd you win?

ALL: The jukebox.

That's right.
Boy, was he mad.

He probably
never got over it.

Wait a minute, now.
You said it was just
a teenage tale, a legend.

Well, it was.

Sort of.

Things got blown way
out of proportion.

Things were a lot easier
back then.

There was only one
traffic light on Broadway.

Now there's about
15 of them.

The Twin Cities
almost doubled in size.

Actually, they're only
40% larger.

It's almost impossible,
Fat Man knows that.

Blowing up your car
was just an insurance policy.

Well, I guess I'm just
gonna have to do the
almost impossible.

I think we should
go for it.

All the way.
Let's take the Fat Man.

Now, wait minute.
Wait minute.

You got to have a plan,
and you're going to need
all the help you can get.

(TRAIN HORN HONKS)

(ALL CHEERING)

(SIGHS)

You said to save this place,
we were gonna have
to get mean.

Mr. J. said we were gonna
have to work together.

Now can you imagine
what we could do
if we got mean together?

It's a 427 big block,
Dylan.

It's one tough engine.

I gave her a new cam.
Mags.

Headers.
Elephant carb.

Now, how long's
this run again?

Twenty minutes.

(WHISPERS)
Twenty minutes?

Well, I guess, you know,
probably should make it.

Oh, yeah, uh,
there's one major problem.

The, uh,
the glove compartment
is rusted shut.

I couldn't get it open.

I guess I can
live with that.

Oh, yeah?
Yeah.

Well then, I guess
she's perfect.

My dad's a fireman.

I kind of borrowed this...

It turns red

into green. (CHUCKLES)

So, if you've got a plan...

We're all the help you need.

Let's do it.

(ALL CHEERING)

Blue 22! Blue 22!

Hut!

(CROWD CHEERING)

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

And the Apollo touchdown
is the result of another
Cathedral fumble.

It starts in
five minutes.
Starts in five minutes.

Five minutes.
ALL: Five minutes.

It starts in
five minutes.
It starts in five minutes.

Five minutes.
Five minutes.

(CAR APPROACHING)

So...

Where's the hero?

Right there.

(ENGINE REVVING)

Fast Freddie.

Fast Freddie
sends his regards.

No matter.

The lady's right.

You'll be working
for me for years.

We're gonna have the
jukebox in your creep's hands
by the 10 minute mark.

But if he so much
as scratches it,

I'll personally kill him.

Spare me, please.

I love a challenge.

Now maybe
it'll be interesting.

$200,000, Mr. Phatmun.

One minute and counting,
Mr. Malone.

(ENGINE STARTS)

Good luck, kid.
(LAUGHS)

(DOOR OPENS)
(SIGHS)

What are you doing?

I leave in 20 seconds.
Get out.

I'm going with you.
Oh, no you're not.

You need a navigator.
You need somebody
to read the map

and work the black box.
No way.

It's dangerous.
I do it alone.

No way.

It's dangerous
and we do it together.

Melissa,
get the hell out of here!
(BEEPING)

Hit it!

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(CROWD CHEERING)

JOHNSON: And he's off.
It's off.

Uh, the football race,
the game, the kick, uh...

Never mind.

NEVIL: Hey!
(BANGING ON LOCKER)

Monkey!

Monkey,
let me out of here!

Hey!

Navel, will you
turn this thing off?

Sorry!

Now, hold this.

Oh, this goes great
with the outfit.

Hey, why don't you
just hand me a neon sign?

Listen, listen,
listen to me.

Why don't we
just tell Mr. J.?

He probably would've
given us the jukebox.

Mr. J's got
enough worries.

Besides, I didn't hear you
volunteering to tell him.

(CLATTERING)

Navel, I'm gonna need you
to be very quiet.

Can you understand that?

Ralphy's wandering around
the halls somewhere.

(BEEPS)

You know...

You're like a nightmare.

A jinx. What?

You decided,
"Hmm, Dylan Malone.

"I'll bet I can
mess up his life."

I'm the nightmare?
Who came to whom first?

It wasn't me.

My life was perfectly happy
before you walked right in.
Face first.

Who said
"Let's go double or nothing"?

(DEEP VOICE) "Say,
I have nifty little idea
for a fundraiser."

Right at the corner?
Uh, yes.

Oh, no.
Left at 42nd.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Sorry.
(SIRENS WAILING)

Oh, great. Cops.

They're just doing
their job.

Whose side are you
on anyway?

OFFICER: In pursuit
of a red '57 Chevy.

No license plate.

MAN: Hey, Phil.
You left your wallet.

Thanks.

Whoa!

Relax.

Here they come.

Whoa!

(OFFICER GRUNTS)

Kids these days.
What'll they
think of next?

(LAUGHING)

OFFICER: (OVER RADIO)
He's heading down 3rd.
Cut him off at 32nd.

Hut.

(BLOWS WHISTLE)

OFFICER: Damn it.
We lost him.

They lost him.
(CROWD CHEERING)

Whose team are you
for anyway?

Chill out, man.
The crowd's cheering
'cause the cops lost Dylan.

Oh. Oh, then that's cool.
Sorry!

(WHISPERS)
If Ralphy catches us,
we're dead meat.

RALPHY: Skippy.

Skippy.

Here, Skippy.

Skippy.

Here, Skip.

DYLAN:
The mall is
on the right, right?

Uh...

Left.

MELISSA:
We go left at Main Street.

DYLAN: Right.
No, left.

Right? Yes!
Left!

Right.
Left!

I'm agreeing with you.
"Right" as in "Correct,"
as in "You are right."

Oh, right.
Jesus.

(BOTH SCREAMING)

Kickass, Malone!

Whoo.

(DISTANT CHEERING)

(DOOR CLATTERS)
Shh.

(BOTH SHUSHING)

(DOG GROWLING)

(LAUGHING) Skip...

Skipper. Skipper, man.
He's got some growl, huh?

Come here.
You scared the
hell out of us.

Monkey, enough with
the mutt. He got less
than five minutes.

You're tugging on me.
Why are you tugging on me?

Don't tug on me.

Okay.

Here goes.
(CLICKS)

(BOTH CHEERING)

(SIREN WAILING)

OFFICER: He's going 90.
No license plate.

He's over the
Mendota Bridge.

ALL:
He's over the Mendota Bridge!

ALL: He's over the
Mendota Bridge.

(CHEERING)

He's over the
Mendota Bridge.

He's over the
Mendota Bridge.

He's over the
Mendota Bridge.

He's over the
Mendota Bridge.

He's over the
Mendota Bridge!

Set! Hut!

(GRUNTING)

(BLOWS WHISTLE)

(CROWD CHEERING)

JOHNSON: He's over
the Mendota Bridge.
Touchdown!

(LAUGHING)

He just might make it.

Phatmun's gonna lose again.

(LAUGHING)

Gonna lose again.

What is it he's gonna lose?

Again. What is it
he's gonna win?

What is it
he's gonna win?

It's that jukebox.

He wants the jukebox.

They're gonna
give him the jukebox.

We're not gonna make it.
There's no way that
we're gonna make it.

We are going to make it,
all right?

So, shut up and push.

Freeze.

BOTH: Hey, Ralph.

You're busted.

Busted, Ralphy?
For what?

Stealing school property.
That's for what.

Get your hands up.

We weren't stealing
it, Ralphy.

What we were doing is,
we were, um,

taking it to get it fixed.

Yeah, really.

Come on. Let's move it.

I caught 'em
red-handed, Mr. J.

All right, Monkey.
What's the deal?

Okay.

The deal is,

we gotta get this
jukebox to the repairman

that is waiting down
in the parking lot.

And if we don't get it
to him in the next
30 seconds,

there is no deal.
(JOHNSON SIGHING)

Why me?

Well, what the hell
are we standing here for?

Come on, Ralphy.
Help us.

PHATMUN: The jukebox
isn't there yet?

They got 30 seconds,
then they forfeit.

Hey, is Dirk ready?

MANNEY:
Yeah. Everybody's set.

He ain't got a chance.

And if the cops
don't get him by then,
we will for sure.

(LAUGHS) Shit.
(DOG BARKING)

(SIGHS) Yeah, boss.

Looks like they made it
with the jukebox on time.

So, what else did you
put up for collateral?

Just Dylan's future.

MELISSA: The time's half over.

DYLAN: We're just about
halfway there.

We're doing good.

Well.

What?

Well. We're doing well.

You can't say
"We're doing good."

It's not grammatically
correct.

Give me a break, Melissa.

I'm sorry.

You can't change me,
you know.

I know.

And you can't
change me either.

I know.

(HELICOPTER WHIRRING)

OFFICER: (OVER SPEAKER)
Pull over and stop.
This is the police.

Oh, my God.
Pull over and stop now.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

OFFICER: All units,
we have spotted the '57 Chevy
heading west...

Dylan, I'm scared.

Me, too.

But not for long.

Here we go.

OFFICER: We got him
now. Car 54.

He's just pulled into
a car wash.

86th and Division.

Shop class.

You ought to take
one some time.

Move it!

OFFICER: Here he comes.

What the hell?

Where is he?

Where is he?

Which one is he?

Careful.

Well, you guys could
give me hand.

Wait a minute.
That's our tarp.

Get out of the way,
pinhead.

(ENGINE SPUTTERS)

Hey, does anybody
know where these are
supposed to go?

Uh, boss...
(LAUGHS)

Yeah, we seem to be
having a little problem
here getting the van...

Hello, Johnny.

Who's this?

Freddie?

Freddie Johnson?
That's right.

Looks like I'm gonna
take you down again,
Phatmun.

Not a chance. (LAUGHS)

Well, then how about
a little side bet?

All right, Malone's
gonna be here
any minute,

so you guys just
hang tight, all right?

We just might make it.

Maybe.

Oh, that's creative.

MELISSA: What is it?
A road block.

Another insurance policy.

Gotta get around it.

Think, Malone, think.
Stop!

(TIRES SCREECHING)

What? What?

I don't know.
I don't know.

What are you doing?
I'll think of something.

Get in here.

Trust me.

MELISSA: Hey!

Hey, hey!

Hey, you guys!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey, you scumbags!

Here goes nothing.

Hey. Hey.

Ahhh!

Hey, get back here,
you shithead!

Damn it.
(TIRES SCREECHING)

Shit.

Come on, Dirk.

(LAUGHING)

Hey, wait! Wait!

Hey!

Hey!

All right.

It's all over, Malone.

It ain't over till
the Fat Man sings.

No way.
Not to this car,
you don't.

Okay, buddy.

I've got your
number now.

Not this time, sucker.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(LAUGHS)

He's not gonna make it.

He'll make it.

Okay, this is it.

Last play.

Let's go for the long shot.
Hail Mary.

Throw it to me.

I'm a long shot.

I haven't caught
a pass all season.

What the hell.

Ready?

ALL: Break!

All right, boys.

Let's do it.

Blue 22. Blue 22.

Hut!

(CROWD CHEERING)
(BLOWS WHISTLE)

(LAUGHING)

ALL: Ten.

Nine.

Eight.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Four.

Three.
Come on.

(CROWD CHEERING)

JOHNSON:
The unknown driver

flew through the goalposts
and then took off

out the back of the stadium.

(CHEERS)

(LAUGHING)

Uh-oh.

(LAUGHING)

You guys are all fired.

You'll never work
in this town again.

(DISTANT CHEERING)

(RECEIVER CLICKS)

(SIREN WAILING)

NEVIL: So...

We're probably
gonna be pretty good
friends now, huh?

MONKEY: Yeah, I guess
we're gonna be
friends now, Nevil.

What did you say?

Yes. Now
we're friends.

No, no, no.
You called me Nevil.

No, I didn't.
No, I did not.
Yes, you did.

I heard you say it.
No. I'm sure I didn't.

No, I did not.
You absolutely said it.
Yes, you did.

All right. See,
now you're pushing the
friendship thing already.

Dylan.

What surprise.

Mr. J. What's happening?

I made a
little side bet.

Congratulations.

You just won the
brand new Johnny Phatmun
college scholarship.

You earned it.

(SIGHS) Thanks, Mr. J.

Thank you.

Hey, look.
I've got to go.

I've got to go
find someone.

Look...

Thank you very much.
Mmm-hmm.

MELISSA: Hey!

You looking for someone?

(LAUGHING)

You did it.

Really.
No.

No. We did it.

Yeah.

(LAUGHS)

JOHNSON:
Good morning, everybody.

And what a morning it is.

The big news.
This past weekend's
lawn mowing project

made a profit of $200,000.

Let's hear it for
Cathedral High.

(BLUE MOON
BY THE MARCELS PLAYING)