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Previously on
Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce...
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00:00:03,234 --> 00:00:04,902
We've never really made love.
3
00:00:05,219 --> 00:00:07,137
You're really
emotionally blocked.
4
00:00:07,221 --> 00:00:09,973
- I have this guy.
- Your shrink?
5
00:00:10,057 --> 00:00:11,057
Like a shaman.
6
00:00:11,109 --> 00:00:13,810
Are we prepared
for our journey
7
00:00:13,978 --> 00:00:15,812
to self-revelation
through ayahuasca?
8
00:00:15,947 --> 00:00:17,814
What's the story
with you and Ralf?
9
00:00:17,949 --> 00:00:19,316
He gets off on paying me now.
10
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:21,318
- Child support?
- No, he has to pay that.
11
00:00:21,486 --> 00:00:23,487
This is for services rendered.
12
00:00:23,621 --> 00:00:24,621
Lyla, what's going on?
13
00:00:24,622 --> 00:00:27,824
70-30 custody in Dan's favor.
14
00:00:27,959 --> 00:00:31,294
[Whispers]
I just thought that maybe
15
00:00:31,412 --> 00:00:33,497
we could go on a trip.
16
00:00:33,631 --> 00:00:34,965
It's gonna be an adventure.
17
00:00:35,082 --> 00:00:37,167
Why did we have to split
18
00:00:37,301 --> 00:00:40,003
for me to see
how goddamn beautiful you are?
19
00:00:43,527 --> 00:00:47,327
_
20
00:00:47,996 --> 00:00:48,996
Lyla?
21
00:00:49,097 --> 00:00:52,316
Lyla, Lyla, Lyla, Lyla, Lyla?
22
00:00:52,433 --> 00:00:53,600
Mm.
23
00:00:53,735 --> 00:00:56,653
Lyla, this is
message four, seven?
24
00:00:56,771 --> 00:00:59,273
I don't know,
I stopped counting.
25
00:00:59,407 --> 00:01:03,527
I know you are upset with me,
but I need you to call me back.
26
00:01:03,661 --> 00:01:05,195
Call me back,
or I'll put your dating profile
27
00:01:05,330 --> 00:01:07,998
on ranchersonly.com,
and yes, that is a thing.
28
00:01:08,116 --> 00:01:09,533
Call me.
29
00:01:09,667 --> 00:01:12,586
I'm gonna see you again
tonight
30
00:01:12,704 --> 00:01:17,424
31
00:01:17,842 --> 00:01:20,294
Really, Mom?
32
00:01:20,428 --> 00:01:22,629
Do you remember your
Princess Jasmine birthday party?
33
00:01:22,764 --> 00:01:24,381
No, it was like
a zillion years ago.
34
00:01:24,515 --> 00:01:27,801
You were six, maybe seven.
You were so obsessed with her.
35
00:01:27,969 --> 00:01:30,053
When she showed up, you and
your friends started screaming
36
00:01:30,138 --> 00:01:31,972
like it was the Beatles.
It was so cute.
37
00:01:32,140 --> 00:01:34,474
Um, I picked out the birthday dress I want.
It's from Anthropologie.
38
00:01:34,609 --> 00:01:35,976
Let me just take one picture
of you wearing it, please?
39
00:01:36,110 --> 00:01:38,445
Can I get it?
It's on sale for $220.
40
00:01:38,563 --> 00:01:39,813
Lilly, that's a lot of money
for a dress.
41
00:01:39,948 --> 00:01:40,981
You said I could pick one out.
42
00:01:41,115 --> 00:01:44,484
Reasonably priced.
Nothing more than $150.
43
00:01:44,619 --> 00:01:45,986
You spend twice as much
as that on dresses.
44
00:01:46,120 --> 00:01:47,788
Well, I'm twice your age.
45
00:01:47,905 --> 00:01:49,905
- [Sighs] Whatever.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
46
00:01:49,907 --> 00:01:52,159
I just need you to help me pick
out a food truck for your party.
47
00:01:52,293 --> 00:01:53,794
I'm thinking Kogi.
48
00:01:53,911 --> 00:01:55,329
Mom, no, taco trucks
are so over.
49
00:01:55,496 --> 00:01:56,536
They're filled with carbs.
50
00:01:56,664 --> 00:01:57,497
[Balloon pops]
[Gasps]
51
00:01:57,632 --> 00:01:59,967
Charlie!
Leave the balloons alone.
52
00:02:00,084 --> 00:02:01,585
It was Chad, not me.
53
00:02:01,719 --> 00:02:03,170
[Whispers]
Chad.
54
00:02:03,304 --> 00:02:04,864
What 14-year-old girl
doesn't eat carbs?
55
00:02:05,006 --> 00:02:06,006
My friends.
56
00:02:06,007 --> 00:02:08,342
There's something on the wall,
Mom.
57
00:02:08,509 --> 00:02:10,344
Okay, fine,
no tacos for you then.
58
00:02:10,428 --> 00:02:12,346
- It's really, really big, Mom.
- You gotta eat something.
59
00:02:12,430 --> 00:02:13,897
I was thinking maybe we could
get a Sushi truck.
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00:02:14,015 --> 00:02:15,849
Sushi has rice.
Rice is a carb.
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00:02:15,984 --> 00:02:18,935
- Sashimi, Mom, obviously.
- Mom, Chad saw it first, see?
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00:02:19,070 --> 00:02:20,270
Look.
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00:02:20,405 --> 00:02:22,322
[Door closes]
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00:02:24,609 --> 00:02:25,926
Shit.
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00:02:25,950 --> 00:02:30,450
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
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00:02:41,092 --> 00:02:43,877
[Indistinct chatter]
67
00:02:44,012 --> 00:02:46,213
Phoebe?
Hey, what are you doing here?
68
00:02:46,347 --> 00:02:49,016
I was hoping to talk to Lyla
about legal advice
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00:02:49,133 --> 00:02:50,851
because of the baby
that ate the bracelet in Vegas.
70
00:02:50,935 --> 00:02:52,185
Oh, right, yeah, yeah.
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00:02:52,303 --> 00:02:54,271
Well, Mom is
understandably freaking out,
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00:02:54,389 --> 00:02:55,555
so I thought
maybe she could help me,
73
00:02:55,723 --> 00:02:58,141
but she's not here.
74
00:02:58,276 --> 00:02:59,393
- Oh, well, that's weird.
- Yeah.
75
00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:01,445
She's usually here
before 8:30.
76
00:03:01,562 --> 00:03:03,730
Hi, excuse me, can I, uh,
borrow her for a sec?
77
00:03:03,815 --> 00:03:05,449
Yeah.
78
00:03:05,566 --> 00:03:06,983
- Hey.
- Hey.
79
00:03:07,068 --> 00:03:09,069
I got an email late last night
from Lyla.
80
00:03:09,203 --> 00:03:10,203
She's taking a leave
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00:03:10,288 --> 00:03:12,989
starting today.
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00:03:13,124 --> 00:03:15,992
A leave?
For how long?
83
00:03:18,162 --> 00:03:19,162
[Mouths word]
84
00:03:21,082 --> 00:03:22,082
No answer.
85
00:03:22,133 --> 00:03:23,653
She is not answering
any of my texts.
86
00:03:23,718 --> 00:03:24,718
This is my fault.
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00:03:24,752 --> 00:03:25,992
It was everything
I said to her,
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00:03:26,087 --> 00:03:27,421
and Vegas was the last straw.
89
00:03:27,588 --> 00:03:30,223
Oh, honey,
please do not worry about Lyla.
90
00:03:30,341 --> 00:03:31,658
You know, this is probably
one of her stunts.
91
00:03:31,792 --> 00:03:32,692
[Chuckles]
92
00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:35,896
She's probably at the Palmilla
drinking margaritas,
93
00:03:35,980 --> 00:03:39,232
trying to make Dan sweat because
his meal ticket's gone awol.
94
00:03:39,350 --> 00:03:40,851
Mm?
[Phone beeps]
95
00:03:40,985 --> 00:03:41,985
Yeah?
96
00:03:42,019 --> 00:03:44,020
Your father's
on the phone again.
97
00:03:44,105 --> 00:03:45,605
Okay, take a message, please.
98
00:03:45,740 --> 00:03:48,275
Okay,
and Gordon Beech is here.
99
00:03:48,409 --> 00:03:49,576
Great.
Thank you.
100
00:03:49,660 --> 00:03:53,113
[Clears throat]
101
00:03:53,247 --> 00:03:57,617
Gordon Beech as in married
to the designer Courtney Beech?
102
00:03:57,752 --> 00:03:59,786
One and the same.
And he was married.
103
00:04:00,454 --> 00:04:02,289
You're primping.
104
00:04:02,457 --> 00:04:03,590
Is he hot?
105
00:04:03,708 --> 00:04:06,209
I freshen for every meeting,
doll.
106
00:04:06,344 --> 00:04:07,294
Please don't worry about Lyla.
107
00:04:07,428 --> 00:04:08,428
She'll turn up.
108
00:04:08,463 --> 00:04:09,546
[Beeping]
109
00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:10,714
Ugh.
110
00:04:10,848 --> 00:04:13,100
The foundation under the house
has shifted,
111
00:04:13,184 --> 00:04:14,935
so the crack is
gonna continue spreading
112
00:04:15,019 --> 00:04:16,770
unless you get a retaining wall.
113
00:04:16,888 --> 00:04:18,138
A retaining wall?
114
00:04:18,306 --> 00:04:21,274
Ugh, they're so bleak
and prison-breaky.
115
00:04:21,392 --> 00:04:22,609
True, but they also
keep your house
116
00:04:22,727 --> 00:04:24,060
from sliding down the hill.
117
00:04:24,195 --> 00:04:25,595
Yeah, well, Max,
how urgent is this?
118
00:04:25,646 --> 00:04:28,315
Because we cannot cancel
Lilly's birthday party.
119
00:04:28,399 --> 00:04:29,783
Well, I mean,
unless said party's
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00:04:29,901 --> 00:04:31,061
gonna be sliding down a hill.
121
00:04:31,119 --> 00:04:32,439
And I can't do it
next week either
122
00:04:32,487 --> 00:04:34,454
because Jo's coming to visit me,
and she's staying here.
123
00:04:34,572 --> 00:04:35,655
Jo?
Jo the ho?
124
00:04:35,823 --> 00:04:37,124
Don't call her that.
125
00:04:37,241 --> 00:04:38,801
That's how
she introduced herself to me.
126
00:04:38,876 --> 00:04:40,794
I believe she also
introduced herself to you
127
00:04:40,878 --> 00:04:41,878
with her vagina.
128
00:04:41,963 --> 00:04:44,998
- Please don't.
- Hello, hello, Max.
129
00:04:45,166 --> 00:04:47,000
First time, vagina.
Don't remind me.
130
00:04:47,168 --> 00:04:48,728
Okay, I thought
you broke up with her.
131
00:04:48,836 --> 00:04:50,236
- She's a crazy person.
- You hated her.
132
00:04:50,254 --> 00:04:51,254
So it's my fault?
133
00:04:51,339 --> 00:04:52,672
We were married.
I picked you.
134
00:04:52,840 --> 00:04:54,508
[Charge fanfare ringtone]
Oh, that is convenient.
135
00:04:54,592 --> 00:04:56,272
It's the guy I called
about the estimate.
136
00:04:56,344 --> 00:04:58,929
Look, we don't need to deal
with the foundation today,
137
00:04:59,013 --> 00:05:00,564
but it needs to be handled soon.
138
00:05:00,681 --> 00:05:03,517
Oh, um, Lilly called me
about her birthday dress.
139
00:05:03,651 --> 00:05:04,851
I haven't gotten her
anything yet, so is it okay if--
140
00:05:04,986 --> 00:05:06,486
- It's a little pricey, so--
- Okay.
141
00:05:06,571 --> 00:05:08,738
You know what,
just get it.
142
00:05:08,856 --> 00:05:10,357
Sure, yeah.
143
00:05:10,441 --> 00:05:12,275
Okay.
144
00:05:13,744 --> 00:05:14,861
- [Chuckles]
- And...
145
00:05:14,946 --> 00:05:16,496
And about last night--
The other--not last night,
146
00:05:16,614 --> 00:05:18,365
the other night, um...
Yeah, well-
147
00:05:18,449 --> 00:05:20,367
- We should, um...
- Are we okay?
148
00:05:20,501 --> 00:05:21,668
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
149
00:05:21,752 --> 00:05:23,537
Yeah, I mean, is there
anything you need to talk about?
150
00:05:23,671 --> 00:05:26,173
- No, no, good, good, good.
- Okay, good.
151
00:05:26,290 --> 00:05:27,707
Um, I do want to mention that,
152
00:05:27,842 --> 00:05:28,842
you know,
me and Becca are still,
153
00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,680
- you know, together.
- Of course. I get that.
154
00:05:30,795 --> 00:05:32,128
- Okay, just saying.
- Yeah, I get that.
155
00:05:32,213 --> 00:05:34,297
Good.
156
00:05:34,432 --> 00:05:36,466
Do you and Becca
use protection?
157
00:05:36,551 --> 00:05:38,018
Yeah.
158
00:05:38,102 --> 00:05:39,219
Oh, yeah, nothing's been spread.
159
00:05:39,353 --> 00:05:40,971
No one's been contaminated,
Abby.
160
00:05:41,055 --> 00:05:42,973
Okay.
161
00:05:43,107 --> 00:05:44,558
Are you still on the pill,
by the way, because--
162
00:05:44,725 --> 00:05:46,393
Oh--
Oh, my god.
163
00:05:46,477 --> 00:05:48,478
- Charlie, hey.
- Charlie!
164
00:05:48,613 --> 00:05:49,653
Come here.
Give me the gun.
165
00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:50,564
You can't shoot things
in the house.
166
00:05:50,731 --> 00:05:52,032
You hit Mom
right in the face.
167
00:05:52,116 --> 00:05:53,033
You got to be careful with that,
okay?
168
00:05:53,150 --> 00:05:54,150
Come here.
169
00:05:54,202 --> 00:05:55,485
Can you apologize to your mom,
please?
170
00:05:55,570 --> 00:05:57,120
It wasn't me.
It was Chad.
171
00:05:57,238 --> 00:05:58,371
Okay, who's Chad?
172
00:05:58,489 --> 00:06:01,992
Chad is
Charlie's new friend--invisible.
173
00:06:02,076 --> 00:06:04,911
Oh, Charlie, can I meet Chad?
Where is he?
174
00:06:05,046 --> 00:06:07,247
Talk to him, maybe.
Um, maybe later.
175
00:06:07,381 --> 00:06:10,884
He's kind of taking
a dump right now.
176
00:06:10,968 --> 00:06:11,968
- Okay.
- Ew. Wow.
177
00:06:12,003 --> 00:06:13,253
Hey, Uncle Max.
178
00:06:13,387 --> 00:06:15,027
- Hey, dude.
- All right, what's the news?
179
00:06:15,056 --> 00:06:16,172
Oh, the good news is,
180
00:06:16,307 --> 00:06:17,757
my architect friend's
giving you a good deal,
181
00:06:17,892 --> 00:06:20,227
but you're looking
at about 20k.
182
00:06:20,311 --> 00:06:21,595
- Jesus.
- Wow.
183
00:06:21,762 --> 00:06:23,597
How are we
supposed to afford that?
184
00:06:23,764 --> 00:06:26,016
I mean,
you could sell your Birkin.
185
00:06:26,150 --> 00:06:27,484
- Ha.
- Right.
186
00:06:27,602 --> 00:06:28,802
You have always been resentful
187
00:06:28,853 --> 00:06:30,437
that Mom gave that to me
when she purged her closet.
188
00:06:30,571 --> 00:06:33,189
Um, I might be able
to swing it
189
00:06:33,324 --> 00:06:34,241
if you can give me some time.
190
00:06:34,358 --> 00:06:36,409
We'll see.
[Chuckles]
191
00:06:36,527 --> 00:06:39,162
- You can cover it?
- Yes? I'm-
192
00:06:39,280 --> 00:06:40,280
- Can you not do that please?
- Hey, Charlie.
193
00:06:40,414 --> 00:06:41,948
Sorry, how?
194
00:06:42,083 --> 00:06:44,784
Okay, if you must, um,
195
00:06:44,919 --> 00:06:46,920
Joseph Gordon-Levitt
read the Ukraine script
196
00:06:47,038 --> 00:06:48,558
and apparently
he flipped over it, so--
197
00:06:48,589 --> 00:06:49,923
- Jake, that's incredible!
- Okay, I don't--
198
00:06:50,041 --> 00:06:51,291
I don't know yet,
so I don't want to jinx it.
199
00:06:51,459 --> 00:06:53,260
But, you know,
obviously if he bites on it--
200
00:06:53,377 --> 00:06:55,762
- Oh, my god, amazing.
- It would be, but not yet.
201
00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,298
Oh, my god.
202
00:06:58,432 --> 00:06:59,466
Look, I know
it's really hard right now,
203
00:06:59,634 --> 00:07:01,101
but try not to stress
about the money stuff.
204
00:07:01,185 --> 00:07:02,385
- Okay.
- And we'll--
205
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:03,386
Yeah, we're gonna focus
on Lilly right now.
206
00:07:03,471 --> 00:07:04,688
Yeah.
207
00:07:04,805 --> 00:07:06,565
We're gonna give her
the most unforgettable
208
00:07:06,607 --> 00:07:09,109
14-year-old birthday party
ever possible.
209
00:07:09,193 --> 00:07:10,810
- 14-year-old--
- Oh, my god.
210
00:07:10,945 --> 00:07:13,446
Becca's coming.
She said yes.
211
00:07:13,564 --> 00:07:15,565
Becca Riley's
coming to my party.
212
00:07:15,650 --> 00:07:16,783
[Gasps]
213
00:07:18,069 --> 00:07:21,288
[Door closes]
I didn't--
214
00:07:21,405 --> 00:07:22,956
Your wife wants 70%
of Courtney Beech
215
00:07:23,074 --> 00:07:25,325
including all shares
in and out of America,
216
00:07:25,493 --> 00:07:27,711
full creative control,
basically, all of it.
217
00:07:27,828 --> 00:07:28,995
That's not surprising.
218
00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:32,332
So I have come up with
a corporate assets proposal,
219
00:07:32,416 --> 00:07:33,333
if you look at the first page--
220
00:07:33,417 --> 00:07:36,169
Something's different.
221
00:07:36,337 --> 00:07:37,837
- Excuse me?
- Your hair.
222
00:07:38,005 --> 00:07:40,056
You're wearing
your hair differently.
223
00:07:40,174 --> 00:07:41,591
I like it.
It's a good look for you.
224
00:07:41,726 --> 00:07:43,393
You know
what's not a good look?
225
00:07:43,511 --> 00:07:46,096
You, post-cardiac arrest
when your ex walks away
226
00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:48,064
with all your money.
227
00:07:48,182 --> 00:07:49,316
I know what she wants.
228
00:07:49,433 --> 00:07:50,684
I'm not interested
in playing dirty.
229
00:07:50,818 --> 00:07:53,486
It's not about dirty.
It's about fair.
230
00:07:53,604 --> 00:07:55,155
You built the brand with her.
231
00:07:55,272 --> 00:07:56,656
Why should she be able
to take you to the cleaners
232
00:07:56,774 --> 00:07:59,359
and talk trash in Vanity Fair?
233
00:07:59,493 --> 00:08:00,944
She's hurt.
234
00:08:01,078 --> 00:08:02,529
I really don't want
to drag this out.
235
00:08:02,663 --> 00:08:04,197
Let's just give her
whatever she wants,
236
00:08:04,332 --> 00:08:07,701
and I'll build a new brand.
237
00:08:07,835 --> 00:08:10,003
I'm ready to move on, Delia.
238
00:08:10,121 --> 00:08:12,539
Gordon, when you married
Courtney, she had nothing.
239
00:08:12,673 --> 00:08:15,008
Now the company is
a billion-dollar entity.
240
00:08:15,126 --> 00:08:19,346
You cannot bow out
of this fight.
241
00:08:21,048 --> 00:08:24,084
Can you give us some privacy,
please?
242
00:08:25,052 --> 00:08:28,638
Actually, she can't.
243
00:08:28,723 --> 00:08:29,723
She's notating.
244
00:08:29,724 --> 00:08:32,058
Oh, right.
Sorry.
245
00:08:32,193 --> 00:08:34,561
So how do you think
we should handle this?
246
00:08:34,729 --> 00:08:36,813
[Phone rings]
247
00:08:36,897 --> 00:08:39,032
I'm sorry, Mr. Beech.
248
00:08:39,150 --> 00:08:40,400
I have to take this.
249
00:08:40,568 --> 00:08:43,236
Give me a moment.
250
00:08:43,404 --> 00:08:44,988
We're off the clock.
251
00:08:47,491 --> 00:08:50,377
[Phone continues ringing]
252
00:08:52,246 --> 00:08:53,246
[Sighs]
253
00:08:57,084 --> 00:08:58,164
Everything all right, doll?
254
00:08:58,169 --> 00:09:01,838
First of all,
Jake's embryo, Becca,
255
00:09:01,922 --> 00:09:04,174
invited herself
to Lilly's birthday party.
256
00:09:04,258 --> 00:09:06,092
What?
That's outrageous.
257
00:09:06,227 --> 00:09:07,761
It is outrageous.
258
00:09:07,928 --> 00:09:11,731
And he just stood there, like,
staring, dead-eyed,
259
00:09:11,816 --> 00:09:13,600
like the shark in Jaws,
you know what I mean?
260
00:09:13,768 --> 00:09:15,435
This is what I think.
261
00:09:15,603 --> 00:09:18,688
I think that he is actually
262
00:09:18,823 --> 00:09:21,324
afraid of Becca's feelings,
263
00:09:21,442 --> 00:09:24,360
like if he takes her little
juice box away, she might cry.
264
00:09:24,495 --> 00:09:26,579
- Calm down.
- Ugh.
265
00:09:26,697 --> 00:09:27,914
Are you driving?
266
00:09:27,998 --> 00:09:29,416
I can't believe I just
slept with that asshole.
267
00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:30,500
Whoa!
268
00:09:30,501 --> 00:09:31,868
What?
269
00:09:32,002 --> 00:09:33,870
Shit.
270
00:09:33,954 --> 00:09:34,954
Abby?
271
00:09:35,005 --> 00:09:36,456
Are you okay?
Are you okay?
272
00:09:36,624 --> 00:09:37,624
Did you see that?
273
00:09:37,708 --> 00:09:39,459
- Hi.
- Look where you're going.
274
00:09:40,859 --> 00:09:44,310
On Monday, I'd love that
if you're cool with that.
275
00:09:44,445 --> 00:09:46,229
Cool.
[Door closes]
276
00:09:46,613 --> 00:09:48,815
6:30's great.
277
00:09:49,149 --> 00:09:50,783
Oh, yeah, tot--
No, I love that place.
278
00:09:50,901 --> 00:09:52,451
It's great.
It's right--
279
00:09:52,569 --> 00:09:55,121
The address is the--
Um, I do.
280
00:09:55,205 --> 00:09:56,238
[Mouthing words]
281
00:09:56,373 --> 00:09:57,373
Yeah.
Oh, right, yeah.
282
00:09:57,407 --> 00:09:59,158
Yeah, yeah,
just below it, right?
283
00:09:59,292 --> 00:10:02,745
No, no, no, I totally remember.
I do.
284
00:10:02,879 --> 00:10:04,747
I'll see you there, dude.
285
00:10:04,881 --> 00:10:08,167
Um, right, totes.
286
00:10:08,301 --> 00:10:10,386
All right, bye.
287
00:10:10,504 --> 00:10:12,671
Oh, my god!
[Squeals]
288
00:10:12,839 --> 00:10:14,807
My god, somebody is happy!
What?
289
00:10:18,311 --> 00:10:19,345
That was Joseph Gordon-Levitt.
290
00:10:19,429 --> 00:10:21,564
- Like, from Inception?
- Uh-huh.
291
00:10:21,681 --> 00:10:22,921
Like, from
(500) Days of Summer?
292
00:10:22,933 --> 00:10:24,850
- Uh-huh.
- My god, I love him.
293
00:10:24,985 --> 00:10:27,520
Oh, he's so h--
Talented.
294
00:10:27,654 --> 00:10:28,737
Hot! Hot.
295
00:10:28,855 --> 00:10:31,023
You can even say he's hot.
He's hot.
296
00:10:31,191 --> 00:10:32,158
And he wants
to sit down with me
297
00:10:32,275 --> 00:10:34,527
for one-on-one, soon.
298
00:10:34,611 --> 00:10:36,529
- Monday.
- Oh, my god.
299
00:10:36,663 --> 00:10:38,330
Your movie is
totally getting made.
300
00:10:38,465 --> 00:10:39,331
Oh, my god,
301
00:10:39,449 --> 00:10:40,616
- what is happening...
- Babe!
302
00:10:40,700 --> 00:10:42,284
- in my life right now?
- You're blowing up.
303
00:10:42,419 --> 00:10:44,703
I'm so proud of you.
304
00:10:44,788 --> 00:10:45,838
Did I kind of
sound like an idiot?
305
00:10:45,922 --> 00:10:47,339
Did I sound like
I was pushing a little hard?
306
00:10:47,457 --> 00:10:49,057
I think I said "totes"
at one point and--
307
00:10:49,092 --> 00:10:50,376
Jake, relax.
308
00:10:50,460 --> 00:10:52,928
He's a really smart guy.
He's going to love you.
309
00:10:53,046 --> 00:10:54,046
[Sighs]
310
00:10:54,047 --> 00:10:55,631
Oh, when I tell my EP
about this,
311
00:10:55,765 --> 00:10:59,185
you'll totally get that empty
Blood Sisters directing slot.
312
00:10:59,269 --> 00:11:00,386
- Yeah.
- What?
313
00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:01,887
- We talked about this.
- Seriously?
314
00:11:01,972 --> 00:11:03,222
Yeah, I mean,
315
00:11:03,306 --> 00:11:05,441
it's not like your movie
starts shooting tomorrow.
316
00:11:05,559 --> 00:11:07,943
I know, but I got great news,
like, five seconds ago.
317
00:11:08,061 --> 00:11:09,028
Can we just give it a minute
before--
318
00:11:09,146 --> 00:11:10,529
Okay, I'm sorry.
319
00:11:10,647 --> 00:11:12,898
I just thought a gig equals
money, so why not do both?
320
00:11:13,066 --> 00:11:15,951
No, it does, it's just,
you know, that's my project,
321
00:11:16,069 --> 00:11:17,069
and the other thing is--
322
00:11:17,237 --> 00:11:18,904
Just my stupid CW show?
323
00:11:19,072 --> 00:11:21,240
No, that's not what I meant.
324
00:11:21,374 --> 00:11:24,410
Um, it's just not my thing.
325
00:11:24,494 --> 00:11:25,814
Great.
That makes me feel great.
326
00:11:25,912 --> 00:11:27,496
No, Becca,
I'm a middle-aged man.
327
00:11:27,581 --> 00:11:30,216
Like, the demo on the CW
for that is, like, six dudes,
328
00:11:30,333 --> 00:11:31,217
and they're probably
all bronies.
329
00:11:31,334 --> 00:11:32,454
You know what, never mind.
330
00:11:32,469 --> 00:11:34,503
I didn't mean
to make a thing of it.
331
00:11:34,638 --> 00:11:37,973
[Sighs]
332
00:11:38,091 --> 00:11:39,091
Hey.
333
00:11:39,092 --> 00:11:40,092
You know what?
334
00:11:40,093 --> 00:11:41,927
You're right about the money,
335
00:11:42,095 --> 00:11:45,598
but I'm fine, and...
336
00:11:45,682 --> 00:11:46,765
I love the show.
337
00:11:46,900 --> 00:11:48,684
I think you are
a brilliant actress on it.
338
00:11:48,818 --> 00:11:53,189
I was having a moment and did
not mean to bag on your show.
339
00:11:53,323 --> 00:11:55,274
- I'm sorry.
- Okay, thank you.
340
00:12:00,113 --> 00:12:01,947
[Singsong] Oh, my god.
[Phone beeps]
341
00:12:02,115 --> 00:12:04,450
Oh, Lilly invited me
to her birthday party.
342
00:12:04,618 --> 00:12:05,668
You're cool with me going,
right?
343
00:12:05,785 --> 00:12:06,835
Yeah.
344
00:12:06,953 --> 00:12:09,622
- I think that'll be fun.
- Yeah, me too.
345
00:12:09,789 --> 00:12:11,540
[Phone beeps]
346
00:12:12,709 --> 00:12:13,926
Thank you very much.
347
00:12:14,044 --> 00:12:15,044
No problem.
348
00:12:15,128 --> 00:12:16,962
[Indistinct chatter]
349
00:12:17,097 --> 00:12:19,715
I almost killed a future
leader today, Joey Kessler.
350
00:12:19,799 --> 00:12:21,300
What?
Oh, my god.
351
00:12:21,434 --> 00:12:23,135
Delia,
I can't handle a lecture
352
00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:25,304
on how sleeping
with your soon-to-be ex-husband
353
00:12:25,438 --> 00:12:26,639
changes the date of separation,
okay?
354
00:12:26,806 --> 00:12:28,941
Wait, what?
355
00:12:29,025 --> 00:12:32,561
Hello, and I tried calling you
several times.
356
00:12:32,646 --> 00:12:35,481
I know, I've just been
really slammed this week.
357
00:12:37,867 --> 00:12:40,236
I feel terrible about bailing
on you in Vegas.
358
00:12:40,370 --> 00:12:41,237
I'm so sorry.
359
00:12:41,321 --> 00:12:42,621
Good.
360
00:12:42,739 --> 00:12:43,989
And I haven't been
in my right mind, admittedly.
361
00:12:44,124 --> 00:12:46,075
No, you are not.
You slept with Jake...
362
00:12:46,209 --> 00:12:48,460
- Evidence.
- So I forgive you.
363
00:12:48,578 --> 00:12:50,045
How was it?
How was the sex?
364
00:12:50,163 --> 00:12:54,083
It was fine.
It was good.
365
00:12:54,217 --> 00:12:58,003
We were, you know, loaded,
so it was great.
366
00:12:59,839 --> 00:13:01,724
Call me crazy, but I think
his dick has gotten bigger.
367
00:13:01,841 --> 00:13:03,676
Both: No.
368
00:13:03,843 --> 00:13:05,003
- Doesn't happen.
- Or maybe--
369
00:13:05,011 --> 00:13:07,096
Maybe he lost weight or--
I don't know.
370
00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:08,514
Either way,
it was really--
371
00:13:08,682 --> 00:13:10,399
It was really exceptional sex.
372
00:13:10,517 --> 00:13:11,600
Well, if that's the case,
373
00:13:11,735 --> 00:13:13,519
then I think
it's legally appropriate
374
00:13:13,603 --> 00:13:15,154
for you to screw
his brains out again.
375
00:13:15,272 --> 00:13:17,406
No, I can't even look him
in the face
376
00:13:17,524 --> 00:13:19,241
now that Becca has made herself
the star attraction
377
00:13:19,359 --> 00:13:20,399
of Lilly's birthday party.
378
00:13:20,443 --> 00:13:22,194
- She's coming to the party?
- Yeah.
379
00:13:22,362 --> 00:13:23,912
Mama, it is your house.
380
00:13:24,030 --> 00:13:25,748
Absolutely.
I couldn't agree more.
381
00:13:25,865 --> 00:13:27,533
You need to call her
382
00:13:27,667 --> 00:13:30,252
and un-invite little Ms. Blood Sister
and her evil twin.
383
00:13:30,370 --> 00:13:33,706
And her evil twin, yes.
[Chuckles]
384
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:35,207
Yeah, I know,
you're both right.
385
00:13:35,375 --> 00:13:36,875
- Um, is that Lyla?
- No.
386
00:13:37,010 --> 00:13:38,627
- It's Ralf.
- Where is she?
387
00:13:38,762 --> 00:13:41,130
- She is MIA.
- Ladies, Lyla is a big girl.
388
00:13:41,214 --> 00:13:42,214
If she needs your help,
she'll call.
389
00:13:42,349 --> 00:13:44,049
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
390
00:13:44,217 --> 00:13:46,435
All right, chicas,
I am gonna go.
391
00:13:46,553 --> 00:13:49,221
- Where are you going?
- Ralf wants to play.
392
00:13:49,356 --> 00:13:51,890
Oh, look at you, you're such
a good little concubine.
393
00:13:51,975 --> 00:13:54,375
I have had a bad week, and he
wants to make me feel better.
394
00:13:54,477 --> 00:13:55,894
Both: With his penis.
- Jinx.
395
00:13:56,062 --> 00:13:57,529
[Laughter]
396
00:13:57,647 --> 00:14:00,282
So Jake--
Give me the blow by blow.
397
00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:02,618
Well, there was only one blow,
398
00:14:02,736 --> 00:14:04,870
but we did
do a lot of other stuff.
399
00:14:11,828 --> 00:14:14,213
- Hi, how you feeling?
- Better now.
400
00:14:14,297 --> 00:14:17,583
Good. I don't like it
when you're down.
401
00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:21,420
I'm hungry.
Take me out to eat.
402
00:14:21,588 --> 00:14:23,672
Uh, I can't.
I have something.
403
00:14:23,807 --> 00:14:25,487
Well, that doesn't leave
much time for us
404
00:14:25,592 --> 00:14:26,592
to go again, does it?
405
00:14:26,593 --> 00:14:28,477
[Both chuckle]
Yeah.
406
00:14:28,595 --> 00:14:32,314
Phoebe, I mean,
you know I adore you.
407
00:14:33,683 --> 00:14:35,401
Ah.
408
00:14:35,485 --> 00:14:36,985
What's her name?
409
00:14:39,656 --> 00:14:41,357
Carla.
410
00:14:41,491 --> 00:14:43,075
She works at the new hotel,
411
00:14:43,193 --> 00:14:46,945
and she wouldn't appreciate
our little arrangement.
412
00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:49,331
No wonder it was so good.
413
00:14:49,449 --> 00:14:50,833
It was our last time.
414
00:14:53,086 --> 00:14:56,121
Carla.
415
00:14:56,289 --> 00:14:57,790
Is it serious?
416
00:14:59,292 --> 00:15:02,511
I care about her.
417
00:15:02,629 --> 00:15:04,763
And I have something for you,
a proper gift.
418
00:15:04,848 --> 00:15:07,266
Not to say good-bye but,
419
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:09,885
uh, to commemorate
the end of an era.
420
00:15:20,780 --> 00:15:23,198
- It's perfect.
- Yeah.
421
00:15:23,316 --> 00:15:25,484
Let me help you.
422
00:15:39,499 --> 00:15:40,499
[Exhales]
423
00:15:42,469 --> 00:15:44,420
It's beautiful on you.
424
00:15:44,554 --> 00:15:45,721
Come on.
425
00:15:49,843 --> 00:15:51,176
How about now?
426
00:15:51,344 --> 00:15:54,179
Amazing, always, but I--
427
00:15:54,314 --> 00:15:56,315
Now that I know
it's our last time--
428
00:15:56,433 --> 00:15:59,351
I can't--
I can't, okay?
429
00:16:03,072 --> 00:16:06,275
[Sighs]
430
00:16:06,359 --> 00:16:09,495
Okay.
I should, um--I should go.
431
00:16:09,612 --> 00:16:12,498
Let me wash up,
and I'll walk you to your car.
432
00:16:12,615 --> 00:16:15,834
No.
I'm good, Daddy, really.
433
00:16:20,874 --> 00:16:22,875
[Door opens]
434
00:16:22,959 --> 00:16:25,844
[Sighs]
[Door closes]
435
00:16:27,547 --> 00:16:30,549
Okay.
Everything looks normal.
436
00:16:30,633 --> 00:16:34,219
Cool.
Cervix is still up there.
437
00:16:34,354 --> 00:16:35,604
That's, uh--
438
00:16:35,722 --> 00:16:37,773
[clears throat]
Thanks.
439
00:16:37,891 --> 00:16:42,528
So I had, um, unprotected sex
two nights ago,
440
00:16:42,612 --> 00:16:44,730
and I went off the pill
after Jake and I split.
441
00:16:44,814 --> 00:16:46,482
- Abby.
- I know.
442
00:16:46,616 --> 00:16:48,400
Unprotected, bad.
443
00:16:48,485 --> 00:16:52,154
Is it even possible that someone
my age can have a healthy baby?
444
00:16:52,238 --> 00:16:53,872
Possible, yes.
445
00:16:53,957 --> 00:16:55,908
But the odds at your age
are about 50/50.
446
00:16:56,492 --> 00:16:58,243
I see.
447
00:16:58,378 --> 00:17:00,879
Have you given any thought
to the morning-after pill?
448
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:07,085
How long do I have for it
to be effective?
449
00:17:07,253 --> 00:17:11,890
This one, give you
about five days from the act.
450
00:17:12,008 --> 00:17:14,009
It's over the counter.
You can take it at home.
451
00:17:14,093 --> 00:17:15,894
You may feel a few side effects.
452
00:17:16,012 --> 00:17:18,680
Dizziness, nausea,
but any unpleasant feelings
453
00:17:18,815 --> 00:17:21,733
should pass quickly.
454
00:17:21,851 --> 00:17:22,935
I know
it's a really big decision.
455
00:17:23,069 --> 00:17:24,686
You have any more questions?
456
00:17:24,771 --> 00:17:25,854
No, I'm good.
457
00:17:25,989 --> 00:17:27,856
Okay, take care of yourself,
Abby.
458
00:17:27,941 --> 00:17:30,158
Okay.
459
00:17:39,002 --> 00:17:40,202
Where is he?
460
00:17:40,336 --> 00:17:41,336
Abby? Hey.
461
00:17:41,454 --> 00:17:43,622
I thought
I was picking the kids up today.
462
00:17:43,756 --> 00:17:44,790
Yeah, you are.
463
00:17:44,924 --> 00:17:45,791
Lilly left her bag in my car.
464
00:17:45,925 --> 00:17:47,045
You can just give it to her.
465
00:17:47,126 --> 00:17:48,126
Okay.
466
00:17:48,127 --> 00:17:49,962
Hey, I heard you tried
467
00:17:50,046 --> 00:17:51,346
to run over Joey Kessler
this morning.
468
00:17:51,464 --> 00:17:54,633
Jake, I think
you need to dis-invite Becca.
469
00:17:54,717 --> 00:17:55,717
What?
470
00:17:55,718 --> 00:17:56,802
I just think it sends
471
00:17:56,970 --> 00:17:57,803
the wrong message
to Lilly's friends.
472
00:17:57,937 --> 00:17:59,137
What message?
473
00:17:59,305 --> 00:18:00,138
It's a birthday party.
It's one afternoon.
474
00:18:00,273 --> 00:18:01,273
It's an afternoon that
475
00:18:01,391 --> 00:18:03,191
should be about our daughter
turning 14
476
00:18:03,309 --> 00:18:04,359
and not some cw actress.
477
00:18:04,477 --> 00:18:06,728
Some cw actress?
478
00:18:06,813 --> 00:18:08,397
- Really?
- Sorry.
479
00:18:08,531 --> 00:18:09,815
- Can we not, please?
- Sorry.
480
00:18:09,949 --> 00:18:13,285
Look, I'm just not really
very comfortable with it.
481
00:18:13,403 --> 00:18:14,963
Well, you know what?
It's not about you.
482
00:18:15,038 --> 00:18:18,824
It's about Lilly,
and she wants Becca there, so--
483
00:18:18,992 --> 00:18:21,043
Okay, that's good.
484
00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:22,578
- Good?
- You know what?
485
00:18:22,662 --> 00:18:24,880
Why don't I just skip the whole
thing, and you two can host?
486
00:18:24,998 --> 00:18:26,498
Oh, my--
Are you serious right now?
487
00:18:26,633 --> 00:18:27,993
Yeah, you know what,
you can invite
488
00:18:28,001 --> 00:18:30,469
all of Lilly's fake new friends,
489
00:18:30,587 --> 00:18:32,971
and they can tweet
about how awesome it is,
490
00:18:33,089 --> 00:18:34,590
and maybe even get TMZ
to show up.
491
00:18:34,724 --> 00:18:36,164
Okay, what are you doing
right now?
492
00:18:36,225 --> 00:18:38,927
What are you doing?
The crack in the foundation.
493
00:18:39,062 --> 00:18:40,812
Things like that are going
to keep on happening,
494
00:18:40,897 --> 00:18:42,731
and maybe we won't even be able
to afford it.
495
00:18:42,849 --> 00:18:44,369
Then we have to sell the house.
What?
496
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:47,185
And then Lilly's last memory
of her whole birthdapart
497
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:49,237
at the house that we raised her
in, that she grew up in,
498
00:18:49,355 --> 00:18:50,875
is gonna just be
all about Becca Riley.
499
00:18:51,024 --> 00:18:53,859
Abby, we are a long way
from having to sell the house.
500
00:18:53,993 --> 00:18:57,362
Okay?
What's going on?
501
00:18:57,497 --> 00:18:58,864
What is this?
Are you okay?
502
00:18:58,998 --> 00:18:59,948
I have a thing.
I have to go.
503
00:19:00,083 --> 00:19:01,867
I'm fine.
504
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:14,171
[Knock at door]
505
00:19:14,396 --> 00:19:16,916
Hey.
How's the Beech depo prep going?
506
00:19:17,084 --> 00:19:18,584
Good, we got
some good precedent
507
00:19:18,719 --> 00:19:20,253
to go
after those foreign assets.
508
00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:22,221
Okay, great.
509
00:19:22,306 --> 00:19:25,007
And by the way, Beech is
very happy with your work,
510
00:19:25,092 --> 00:19:28,261
but I'm guessing
you already know that.
511
00:19:28,395 --> 00:19:29,478
Look, Al,
I don't know what you've heard,
512
00:19:29,596 --> 00:19:31,564
but I am not
encouraging anything.
513
00:19:31,682 --> 00:19:33,933
- I promise.
- What are you talking about?
514
00:19:34,017 --> 00:19:36,686
You know, I ran into him
the other night at Mozza,
515
00:19:36,820 --> 00:19:38,905
- and he was raving about you.
- Oh.
516
00:19:39,022 --> 00:19:40,823
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, good.
517
00:19:40,941 --> 00:19:43,693
The paralegal saw him get
a little forward with me today,
518
00:19:43,777 --> 00:19:45,278
and I just want
to go on record
519
00:19:45,412 --> 00:19:46,662
saying that I'm not
encouraging anything.
520
00:19:46,780 --> 00:19:48,581
Please.
521
00:19:48,699 --> 00:19:50,700
You know how guys are
in the middle of a divorce.
522
00:19:50,784 --> 00:19:52,752
Their lawyer is their therapist,
523
00:19:52,836 --> 00:19:56,873
and when that lawyer is
an attractive, single woman...
524
00:19:57,007 --> 00:19:58,758
You want me to talk to him?
525
00:19:58,842 --> 00:20:01,010
- Or I can bring somebody else in.
- Absolutely not.
526
00:20:01,128 --> 00:20:03,546
This is a huge case.
I can handle him.
527
00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:05,631
I know you can.
That's why we put him with you.
528
00:20:05,799 --> 00:20:06,799
You're a ball crusher.
529
00:20:06,884 --> 00:20:09,852
Oh, Al,
you say the sweetest things.
530
00:20:12,222 --> 00:20:17,410
Hey, Al, about Lyla,
the whole leave of absence spin,
531
00:20:17,511 --> 00:20:18,694
what's really going on?
532
00:20:18,812 --> 00:20:20,112
Ah.
533
00:20:20,230 --> 00:20:23,232
Okay, how do I
put this delicately?
534
00:20:25,319 --> 00:20:26,869
Lyla's freaking batshit.
535
00:20:26,987 --> 00:20:28,704
[Chuckles]
536
00:20:28,822 --> 00:20:32,158
That's just my legal opinion.
537
00:20:32,292 --> 00:20:35,161
- Have a good night.
- You too.
538
00:20:35,996 --> 00:20:38,414
[Watch ticking]
539
00:20:38,548 --> 00:20:40,166
So do you think
she'll like it?
540
00:20:40,334 --> 00:20:42,835
Yeah, I mean, wow,
how much was that?
541
00:20:43,003 --> 00:20:47,006
Um, I don't know,
it was in my Emmys gift bag.
542
00:20:47,090 --> 00:20:49,258
- Like, 500 bucks?
- Oh.
543
00:20:49,393 --> 00:20:51,644
- Wow.
- Too much?
544
00:20:51,762 --> 00:20:53,262
Yeah, I kind of--
I mean,
545
00:20:53,347 --> 00:20:56,182
that's more than
Lilly's yearly allowance, so--
546
00:20:56,316 --> 00:20:58,351
Right, sorry.
547
00:20:58,485 --> 00:21:00,569
I don't know this stuff.
548
00:21:00,687 --> 00:21:01,854
It's not like
I got a normal childhood.
549
00:21:01,939 --> 00:21:04,490
I spent my 14th birthday
in the back of a grip truck
550
00:21:04,608 --> 00:21:06,859
- with a bunch of teamsters.
- Hey, hey, no.
551
00:21:06,994 --> 00:21:10,112
No apologizing.
552
00:21:10,247 --> 00:21:12,498
I love that watch.
I like it for myself.
553
00:21:12,616 --> 00:21:14,033
- Can I wear it?
- Oh, sure, anytime.
554
00:21:14,117 --> 00:21:15,397
Can we make it
into a necklace?
555
00:21:15,419 --> 00:21:17,670
- Or, like, a choker?
- Or, like, a belt?
556
00:21:17,788 --> 00:21:19,005
[Chuckles]
557
00:21:22,509 --> 00:21:24,669
Seriously, don't apologize.
It's a really nice gesture.
558
00:21:24,711 --> 00:21:26,295
- Okay.
- We'll get her something else.
559
00:21:26,430 --> 00:21:30,132
You know, it's confusing.
560
00:21:30,217 --> 00:21:31,434
- All these rules.
- I know.
561
00:21:31,551 --> 00:21:32,802
I think you're doing amazing.
562
00:21:32,886 --> 00:21:35,554
I mean, I--half the time
I don't know what's right,
563
00:21:35,722 --> 00:21:36,639
so how are you supposed to?
564
00:21:36,773 --> 00:21:39,225
I really care about you.
565
00:21:39,393 --> 00:21:40,693
I don't want to overstep,
566
00:21:40,811 --> 00:21:43,062
but at the same time,
I do exist.
567
00:21:43,230 --> 00:21:46,315
- You know?
- I know, and Lilly loves you.
568
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:49,735
Well, like, when Lilly texted
me about her birthday party,
569
00:21:49,870 --> 00:21:51,570
what am I supposed to say?
570
00:21:51,705 --> 00:21:54,573
[Sighs]
Yeah.
571
00:21:54,708 --> 00:21:56,909
We actually should talk
about that.
572
00:21:58,462 --> 00:22:00,413
Wait, was it a mistake
to say yes?
573
00:22:00,547 --> 00:22:01,547
No.
574
00:22:01,581 --> 00:22:05,217
I mean, it did create
a bit of a mess
575
00:22:05,302 --> 00:22:07,253
- between me and--
- Abby.
576
00:22:07,387 --> 00:22:08,421
Yeah.
577
00:22:08,555 --> 00:22:09,755
You said you were fine
with me going.
578
00:22:09,923 --> 00:22:12,008
I am fine with it,
but that's an example of a time
579
00:22:12,142 --> 00:22:13,259
where I wish
you would've asked me first.
580
00:22:13,393 --> 00:22:16,395
Well, then
why didn't you tell me that?
581
00:22:16,513 --> 00:22:17,980
'Cause I didn't want
to hurt your feelings.
582
00:22:18,098 --> 00:22:20,349
Jake, Lilly invited me.
583
00:22:20,484 --> 00:22:22,768
I know.
It's complicated, okay?
584
00:22:22,903 --> 00:22:24,270
I'm just being honest here.
585
00:22:24,404 --> 00:22:26,324
I'm just telling you
what's going on, that's all.
586
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:29,442
- Yeah, I really appreciate
- Yeah, obviously.
587
00:22:29,576 --> 00:22:32,695
Know what?
I just won't go.
588
00:22:32,829 --> 00:22:34,697
[Door slams]
589
00:22:36,616 --> 00:22:37,616
[Sighs]
590
00:22:43,206 --> 00:22:46,008
This from you?
Seriously?
591
00:22:46,126 --> 00:22:49,378
Oh, Lilly's been so obsessed
with her appearance lately.
592
00:22:49,513 --> 00:22:53,766
I blame Becca Riley,
also known as Satan's spawn.
593
00:22:53,884 --> 00:22:55,684
This actually looks
kind of amazing.
594
00:22:55,802 --> 00:22:57,636
- Yeah.
- Maybe I could use this.
595
00:22:57,771 --> 00:23:01,273
- Get some attention.
- From Ford?
596
00:23:01,391 --> 00:23:02,725
- Mm.
- Come on.
597
00:23:02,859 --> 00:23:04,560
I heard his speech
at the gala.
598
00:23:04,694 --> 00:23:06,145
The man loves you
more than anything.
599
00:23:06,279 --> 00:23:11,984
Yeah, well, love has not
translated into action.
600
00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:14,403
Not for a long time.
601
00:23:14,538 --> 00:23:16,322
Really?
602
00:23:16,490 --> 00:23:17,706
Jump him.
603
00:23:17,824 --> 00:23:20,576
Yeah, well, I tried,
but he's always exhausted.
604
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:23,996
Well, jump him anyway.
He'll remember he likes it.
605
00:23:24,164 --> 00:23:25,965
I promise.
606
00:23:26,049 --> 00:23:28,884
Or you can wait
till Jo comes here next week.
607
00:23:29,002 --> 00:23:31,387
Sure she'll be willing
to give you another tumble.
608
00:23:31,505 --> 00:23:34,140
[Laughs]
609
00:23:35,592 --> 00:23:37,843
I slept with Jake.
610
00:23:42,649 --> 00:23:45,317
Say something.
611
00:23:45,402 --> 00:23:47,987
Uh, like, makeup sex?
612
00:23:48,105 --> 00:23:51,273
Like, drunken, loaded sex.
613
00:23:52,492 --> 00:23:54,827
And we didn't use protection.
614
00:23:54,945 --> 00:23:56,195
Oh.
615
00:23:56,329 --> 00:23:59,698
Oh, wow, wow.
Um...
616
00:24:00,383 --> 00:24:04,420
So there's a possibility
that you could be...
617
00:24:04,538 --> 00:24:05,704
- Yes.
- Pregnant.
618
00:24:09,009 --> 00:24:12,344
Uh, have you told him?
619
00:24:12,462 --> 00:24:14,262
No. Not yet.
I don't want to worry him and--
620
00:24:14,297 --> 00:24:17,383
Okay.
Um...
621
00:24:17,517 --> 00:24:19,969
Abby, do you really see
yourself, like, breast-feeding
622
00:24:20,103 --> 00:24:21,183
and changing diapers again?
623
00:24:21,221 --> 00:24:24,773
Maybe.
Maybe, yeah.
624
00:24:24,891 --> 00:24:26,108
What?
625
00:24:26,226 --> 00:24:27,610
I know you and Jake aren't
626
00:24:27,727 --> 00:24:29,395
you and Jake anymore,
627
00:24:29,479 --> 00:24:31,280
but I still see it, Abs.
628
00:24:31,398 --> 00:24:32,398
There's love there.
629
00:24:32,399 --> 00:24:36,402
Well, 17 years is a long time.
630
00:24:36,486 --> 00:24:39,121
I mean, we built
this house together.
631
00:24:39,239 --> 00:24:42,291
Just be practical, okay?
632
00:24:42,409 --> 00:24:44,243
Having a baby
to save a marriage is--
633
00:24:44,377 --> 00:24:47,114
Yeah, I know, it's stupid.
634
00:24:48,548 --> 00:24:51,300
All I can remember
is the smell of baby head.
635
00:24:51,418 --> 00:24:54,753
When Lilly was born,
I looked at her,
636
00:24:54,888 --> 00:24:59,925
red-faced and pissed off
and screaming at me.
637
00:25:00,010 --> 00:25:02,678
I just thought:
"There she is.
638
00:25:02,812 --> 00:25:05,764
There is the love that I've
been looking for my whole life."
639
00:25:05,932 --> 00:25:07,766
[Door opens]
640
00:25:07,901 --> 00:25:09,235
Becca called.
641
00:25:09,319 --> 00:25:10,236
She said she can't come
to the party anymore.
642
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:12,154
- What did you do?
- Lilly--
643
00:25:12,272 --> 00:25:13,822
This isn't fair.
She's one of my best friends.
644
00:25:13,940 --> 00:25:17,026
Oh, you cannot believe that
she's one of your best friends.
645
00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:19,712
- Oh, like you'd understand.
- Can we--
646
00:25:19,829 --> 00:25:21,629
- Just leave me alone!
- Can we talk about it?
647
00:25:21,698 --> 00:25:23,949
I just want to talk about it.
648
00:25:24,084 --> 00:25:27,219
- Um, do you--you want me to--
- Be my guest.
649
00:25:27,337 --> 00:25:30,005
[Sighs]
Lilly?
650
00:25:30,123 --> 00:25:31,123
Sweetie.
651
00:25:34,120 --> 00:25:35,754
I wanna live, wanna live
652
00:25:36,588 --> 00:25:39,757
Like Johnny Walker,
licking my lips, let it drip
653
00:25:39,875 --> 00:25:43,177
I wanna feel as good
as it gets, break a sweat
654
00:25:43,294 --> 00:25:46,430
I wanna light it up,
I'm like a cigarette
655
00:25:46,548 --> 00:25:48,132
I think I like it
656
00:25:48,266 --> 00:25:51,769
La la la la la la la
I think I like it
657
00:25:51,886 --> 00:25:52,937
La la la la la la la
658
00:25:53,305 --> 00:25:55,473
I know you really
knocked yourself out, mama,
659
00:25:55,607 --> 00:25:56,687
but this party is terrible.
660
00:25:56,691 --> 00:25:57,691
I know.
661
00:25:57,809 --> 00:25:59,860
It's just
all about you-know-who.
662
00:25:59,978 --> 00:26:01,562
It's like
I invited Princess Jasmine
663
00:26:01,696 --> 00:26:02,813
and then I killed her.
664
00:26:02,948 --> 00:26:04,448
I'm a Princess murderer.
665
00:26:04,566 --> 00:26:06,700
Please.
You did the right thing.
666
00:26:06,818 --> 00:26:08,035
I applaud you.
667
00:26:08,153 --> 00:26:12,039
Well, stop clapping
because I left Becca a message
668
00:26:12,157 --> 00:26:13,157
and re-invited.
669
00:26:13,158 --> 00:26:15,659
- Why?
- What?
670
00:26:15,794 --> 00:26:17,495
Just because Jake
is her bitch,
671
00:26:17,629 --> 00:26:19,149
I don't need to be one too.
Oh, my god.
672
00:26:19,214 --> 00:26:21,298
Why did I buy these?
These are my stress food.
673
00:26:21,416 --> 00:26:23,417
There's a reason
they're called Funyuns, babe.
674
00:26:23,552 --> 00:26:25,252
'Cause they're fun onions.
675
00:26:25,337 --> 00:26:27,505
Ooh, baby, look at that bling.
676
00:26:27,639 --> 00:26:28,839
I know, it's blinding me.
677
00:26:28,974 --> 00:26:30,808
Someone should give this woman
an award.
678
00:26:30,909 --> 00:26:33,594
She has mastered
the art of divorced sex.
679
00:26:33,728 --> 00:26:35,646
Yes, you should.
[Phones beep]
680
00:26:35,764 --> 00:26:37,848
- Oh.
- Oh.
681
00:26:37,933 --> 00:26:39,350
Lyla!
682
00:26:39,484 --> 00:26:41,185
"Relax, stalkers.
I'll call you soon."
683
00:26:41,319 --> 00:26:42,736
Oh, god, I told you.
684
00:26:42,854 --> 00:26:44,738
I don't even know
what to say.
685
00:26:44,856 --> 00:26:47,775
You know what, screw it.
I'm so sick of her selfishness.
686
00:26:47,909 --> 00:26:49,577
That is very un-Phoebe-like
of you.
687
00:26:49,694 --> 00:26:52,913
- Good.
- I'm working on a new Phoebe.
688
00:26:53,031 --> 00:26:55,031
And new Phoebe doesn't like
to be taken for granted
689
00:26:55,033 --> 00:26:56,417
by people she cares about.
690
00:26:56,535 --> 00:27:01,038
So... That's what I think.
691
00:27:01,122 --> 00:27:02,756
God, these are so good.
I know, they're so good.
692
00:27:02,874 --> 00:27:04,508
No, don't eat them.
I'm gonna take them away.
693
00:27:04,626 --> 00:27:06,927
[Chuckles]
694
00:27:07,045 --> 00:27:09,797
Oh, Lilly just went off
with Jade.
695
00:27:09,881 --> 00:27:11,182
I don't trust that girl.
696
00:27:11,299 --> 00:27:13,467
She's fast.
697
00:27:13,602 --> 00:27:16,687
- I was fast.
- You still are.
698
00:27:16,771 --> 00:27:18,889
-
I think I like it
- Lilly!
699
00:27:19,024 --> 00:27:20,858
I think I like it,
la la la la
700
00:27:20,942 --> 00:27:23,227
Lilly.
701
00:27:23,361 --> 00:27:26,280
Oh, my god,
it's Becca Riley!
702
00:27:26,398 --> 00:27:28,699
Hey.
Where's the birthday girl?
703
00:27:28,817 --> 00:27:30,618
[Overlapping chatter]
704
00:27:33,655 --> 00:27:34,705
Hey, beautiful.
705
00:27:34,789 --> 00:27:37,124
Happy Birthday.
706
00:27:39,294 --> 00:27:41,662
Oh, my god, it's the one
she wore on Undercover Models.
707
00:27:41,796 --> 00:27:43,914
I love it so much.
Thank you!
708
00:27:44,049 --> 00:27:46,750
I'll give you $100
if you punch Becca in the boob.
709
00:27:46,885 --> 00:27:50,304
- [Laughs]
- I'm so glad you like it.
710
00:27:50,422 --> 00:27:52,673
Abby, thank you
for the invitation.
711
00:27:52,757 --> 00:27:54,437
No, I am--I'm thrilled
you could make it.
712
00:27:54,476 --> 00:27:55,342
So pretty!
713
00:27:55,427 --> 00:27:56,844
[Becca and Abby chuckle]
714
00:27:56,978 --> 00:27:59,513
I can't believe she made it.
715
00:27:59,598 --> 00:28:01,398
This is a pool party,
isn't it?
716
00:28:01,516 --> 00:28:03,150
Why isn't everybody dancing
in the pool?
717
00:28:03,268 --> 00:28:04,735
Come on!
718
00:28:04,853 --> 00:28:06,293
I'm in the club,
they're hating
719
00:28:06,321 --> 00:28:08,155
Their boyfriends
I be taking
720
00:28:08,273 --> 00:28:10,241
They hate it
when they see me
721
00:28:10,358 --> 00:28:11,992
They really wanna be me
722
00:28:12,110 --> 00:28:15,696
It's cute that they notice
but boy don't lose your focus
723
00:28:15,830 --> 00:28:18,115
Your focus, your focus,
boy, don't lose your focus
724
00:28:18,199 --> 00:28:19,416
Becca.
725
00:28:19,534 --> 00:28:22,253
One, two, three,
you think I'm on fire
726
00:28:22,337 --> 00:28:24,455
How they look at me
727
00:28:24,623 --> 00:28:25,623
I'll be right back, okay?
728
00:28:25,674 --> 00:28:29,126
Keep the party going,
birthday girl.
729
00:28:29,261 --> 00:28:30,761
I need a Tequila.
730
00:28:30,879 --> 00:28:32,346
Shot, now.
731
00:28:32,464 --> 00:28:35,466
Um, all my liquor is
in the trunk of my car, so--
732
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:38,218
That was smart.
733
00:28:38,353 --> 00:28:40,471
[Indistinct chatter]
734
00:28:42,857 --> 00:28:44,525
Do they--
Do they look--
735
00:28:44,643 --> 00:28:45,859
Yeah, they're drunk.
736
00:28:49,230 --> 00:28:50,447
Shopping in Dubai
737
00:28:50,565 --> 00:28:52,199
Hey.
738
00:28:52,317 --> 00:28:53,901
- Oh, look, it's her.
- Oh, my god.
739
00:28:54,035 --> 00:28:55,035
I'm really glad you came.
740
00:28:55,036 --> 00:28:56,036
- Me too.
- Um--
741
00:28:56,037 --> 00:28:57,288
It was Abby.
She called me.
742
00:28:57,405 --> 00:28:58,289
Really?
That was nice of her.
743
00:28:58,406 --> 00:28:59,406
- Um...
- Yeah.
744
00:28:59,491 --> 00:29:00,731
I'm sure
Lilly's really pleased.
745
00:29:00,792 --> 00:29:02,076
I mean, I'm really pleased,
746
00:29:02,210 --> 00:29:03,577
and I'm sorry about the, um--
747
00:29:03,712 --> 00:29:04,795
- Can we get a pic with you?
- Yeah.
748
00:29:04,879 --> 00:29:05,879
Okay.
749
00:29:05,914 --> 00:29:08,832
[Laughs]
750
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:11,552
- Oh, my gosh, it looks so good.
- All right, look-
751
00:29:11,670 --> 00:29:13,637
Oh, my god.
752
00:29:13,722 --> 00:29:16,173
- Sweet.
- Hey.
753
00:29:16,341 --> 00:29:18,726
Look--oh, my god,
maybe she wants a selfie.
754
00:29:18,843 --> 00:29:20,763
I think Lilly and her friends
have been drinking.
755
00:29:20,812 --> 00:29:21,729
Really?
Where did they get it?
756
00:29:21,846 --> 00:29:24,014
I don't know,
this whole house is dry.
757
00:29:24,149 --> 00:29:25,432
What did Lilly say?
758
00:29:25,567 --> 00:29:27,351
Jake, Lilly lies
about flushing the toilet.
759
00:29:27,519 --> 00:29:28,602
Max, can you come here
for a second?
760
00:29:28,687 --> 00:29:29,853
I knew there was trouble
the minute Jade showed up
761
00:29:29,938 --> 00:29:30,904
and they snuck into her bedroom
762
00:29:31,022 --> 00:29:31,905
right at the beginning
of the party.
763
00:29:32,023 --> 00:29:33,741
Okay, Abby thinks that maybe
764
00:29:33,858 --> 00:29:35,826
the girls have taken something,
are drinking something,
765
00:29:35,910 --> 00:29:37,528
so let's case the house,
we'll find out what it is.
766
00:29:37,662 --> 00:29:39,830
- Okay? Top to bottom.
- Wow, okay, CSI.
767
00:29:39,914 --> 00:29:41,281
They could be snorting nutmeg.
768
00:29:41,366 --> 00:29:43,283
I totally did it
in junior high.
769
00:29:43,368 --> 00:29:45,252
- Okay.
- What?
770
00:29:45,370 --> 00:29:47,037
Also check their bags
for soda bottles--
771
00:29:47,122 --> 00:29:49,873
That's where I snuck my liquor--
And medicine cabinets--
772
00:29:50,008 --> 00:29:51,041
Always took
my mom's painkillers.
773
00:29:51,176 --> 00:29:52,876
- Wow.
- Um, okay.
774
00:29:53,044 --> 00:29:54,595
I think we should each
pick a room and search it
775
00:29:54,713 --> 00:29:56,263
and try not to be too obvious
about it.
776
00:29:56,381 --> 00:29:58,541
How is this happening?
These girls are in eighth grade.
777
00:29:58,550 --> 00:30:00,467
- I'm gonna take the kitchen.
Both: Okay.
778
00:30:00,602 --> 00:30:02,803
Max, can you just lifeguard,
make sure nobody drowns?
779
00:30:02,887 --> 00:30:04,938
Or pukes in the pool.
What?
780
00:30:05,056 --> 00:30:06,974
I got the bathroom
and the living room.
781
00:30:07,108 --> 00:30:08,275
Okay, and Abby and I
will take upstairs.
782
00:30:08,393 --> 00:30:10,153
If you find what
those little shits are on,
783
00:30:10,228 --> 00:30:11,362
I got first dibs.
784
00:30:11,446 --> 00:30:13,246
I guess I'll just, um,
keep watch down here.
785
00:30:13,314 --> 00:30:15,399
- Great.
- Okay, let's do it.
786
00:30:15,533 --> 00:30:18,736
I'm just gonna, um--
I'm gonna check the bathroom.
787
00:30:25,043 --> 00:30:26,243
- Hey.
- Hey.
788
00:30:26,378 --> 00:30:28,245
I looked in Lilly's room
and Charlie's room.
789
00:30:28,329 --> 00:30:29,830
I didn't find anything.
Did you?
790
00:30:29,914 --> 00:30:32,249
I did.
791
00:30:32,384 --> 00:30:34,051
Is this what I think it is?
792
00:30:37,889 --> 00:30:39,723
[Screams]
793
00:30:46,431 --> 00:30:48,515
[All screaming]
794
00:30:48,650 --> 00:30:49,767
Oh, my god.
795
00:30:49,851 --> 00:30:51,568
- They just jumped in the pool.
- Oh--oh, my god.
796
00:30:51,653 --> 00:30:52,653
- What--
- Oh, my god.
797
00:30:52,771 --> 00:30:53,654
- [Screaming]
- What's happening?
798
00:30:53,772 --> 00:30:55,155
What the hell?
799
00:30:55,273 --> 00:30:56,573
I think there's some towels
in the back house or something.
800
00:30:56,691 --> 00:30:58,525
Lilly, are you okay?
801
00:30:58,660 --> 00:31:01,195
- Becca, I got this.
- Girls are weird.
802
00:31:01,329 --> 00:31:03,329
- Lilly, what's going on?
- You're gonna freak out.
803
00:31:03,364 --> 00:31:04,644
Okay, I'm not going to
freak out.
804
00:31:04,699 --> 00:31:06,333
You need to tell me
what's happening.
805
00:31:06,451 --> 00:31:08,502
- What's going on?
- I have no idea.
806
00:31:08,620 --> 00:31:10,170
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
807
00:31:10,288 --> 00:31:12,456
We need to call poison control.
Why?
808
00:31:12,624 --> 00:31:14,124
No, we need paramedics.
No.
809
00:31:14,209 --> 00:31:15,459
Parents, we should call
the parents, actually.
810
00:31:15,593 --> 00:31:17,961
- Okay, did they--
- I don't know who to call.
811
00:31:18,096 --> 00:31:19,263
Is it bath salts?
'Cause I've seen a thing.
812
00:31:19,380 --> 00:31:20,931
They eat each other's faces.
We have to stop--
813
00:31:21,015 --> 00:31:24,134
They soaked tampons in vodka.
814
00:31:24,269 --> 00:31:25,269
No.
No way.
815
00:31:25,353 --> 00:31:27,554
Yes way,
at first they started drinking,
816
00:31:27,689 --> 00:31:28,806
and then they didn't
want the calories--
817
00:31:28,940 --> 00:31:30,641
- Jade's idea--
- Hold on, hold on, hold on.
818
00:31:30,775 --> 00:31:33,644
- So what you're saying is--
- Their vaginas are on fire.
819
00:31:33,778 --> 00:31:35,896
[Girls screaming]
820
00:31:35,980 --> 00:31:37,898
Ow, it burns!
821
00:31:39,059 --> 00:31:40,943
Why can't you just smoke pot
like a normal kid?
822
00:31:41,310 --> 00:31:43,512
How can you have no idea
who brought the alcohol?
823
00:31:43,646 --> 00:31:45,086
Believe me,
we tried to break them.
824
00:31:45,181 --> 00:31:47,849
If you want to give it a go,
be my guest.
825
00:31:47,984 --> 00:31:50,268
I'm so sorry.
826
00:31:50,436 --> 00:31:52,036
By the way,
your daughter's a delinquent,
827
00:31:52,104 --> 00:31:53,522
and your mommy book's
bullshit.
828
00:31:53,656 --> 00:31:55,774
I mean, we can call
poison control again,
829
00:31:55,942 --> 00:31:57,192
but clearly all the girls
are fine.
830
00:31:57,276 --> 00:32:00,195
And I've never heard of a tampon
soaked in vodka before.
831
00:32:00,329 --> 00:32:02,330
I tried it once,
it doesn't even work.
832
00:32:02,448 --> 00:32:03,928
- Really?
- Let's go, you are grounded
833
00:32:03,950 --> 00:32:05,250
- for the next month.
- Oh, my goodness.
834
00:32:05,334 --> 00:32:07,118
- Jake?
- Yeah, oh, hey.
835
00:32:07,286 --> 00:32:08,753
- You remember Robert?
- Hey, Robert.
836
00:32:08,871 --> 00:32:10,351
- Robert's a law--
- A lawyer, I know.
837
00:32:10,456 --> 00:32:12,674
Remember when I was
at your house
838
00:32:12,792 --> 00:32:13,792
and I fell into
the floating gardenia patch?
839
00:32:13,926 --> 00:32:15,176
That's right, which was
840
00:32:15,294 --> 00:32:16,211
clearly not locked down
properly.
841
00:32:16,295 --> 00:32:19,047
[Women giggling]
842
00:32:22,134 --> 00:32:23,435
Sucks for you.
843
00:32:23,519 --> 00:32:24,799
Hey, give me a hand with this.
844
00:32:24,804 --> 00:32:26,521
Sorry, we're late for our
blow-outs.
845
00:32:26,639 --> 00:32:27,639
Bye.
846
00:32:27,807 --> 00:32:30,358
Thank god
I don't have girls.
847
00:32:35,948 --> 00:32:37,782
- You okay?
- My head.
848
00:32:37,900 --> 00:32:39,618
I just needed a break.
849
00:32:39,702 --> 00:32:41,620
Yeah.
850
00:32:44,407 --> 00:32:47,125
[Chuckles]
851
00:32:47,209 --> 00:32:52,213
- So... morning after pill?
- Mm.
852
00:32:52,331 --> 00:32:55,133
So you weren't on the pill
anymore.
853
00:32:55,251 --> 00:32:56,668
Were you ever gonna
tell me that?
854
00:32:56,752 --> 00:33:00,505
Yeah.
Now.
855
00:33:00,673 --> 00:33:03,341
I don't know.
856
00:33:03,509 --> 00:33:07,729
The box isn't open.
857
00:33:07,847 --> 00:33:09,848
I know.
858
00:33:09,982 --> 00:33:14,519
I know, it's crazy.
I mean, obviously we weren't
859
00:33:14,687 --> 00:33:18,189
- thinking--
- Yeah, yeah.
860
00:33:18,357 --> 00:33:24,195
But if you were or are...
861
00:33:24,330 --> 00:33:27,949
You may want to keep it?
862
00:33:29,368 --> 00:33:32,120
God.
863
00:33:32,204 --> 00:33:36,925
A baby.
864
00:33:37,043 --> 00:33:39,844
Am I crazy to think it was
easier then?
865
00:33:39,962 --> 00:33:41,680
- When the kids were little?
- Yeah.
866
00:33:41,797 --> 00:33:45,016
Yeah, you're totally insane.
867
00:33:50,773 --> 00:33:53,558
- I miss it.
- You do?
868
00:33:53,643 --> 00:33:56,778
I do.
869
00:33:56,896 --> 00:33:58,813
- It was hard.
- Yeah.
870
00:33:58,898 --> 00:34:03,485
But everything
was so new and--
871
00:34:03,569 --> 00:34:05,654
[laughs]
872
00:34:05,788 --> 00:34:08,707
- My god, you were a champ.
- [Laughs]
873
00:34:08,791 --> 00:34:09,908
You were too.
874
00:34:09,992 --> 00:34:14,629
- Damn.
- Yeah.
875
00:34:14,747 --> 00:34:18,583
Oh, my god, I could feel
my heart in my throat
876
00:34:18,718 --> 00:34:21,052
when Lilly was telling me
about the vodka.
877
00:34:21,137 --> 00:34:22,387
It's like we're living
with an alien.
878
00:34:22,505 --> 00:34:24,005
A nightmare.
879
00:34:24,140 --> 00:34:25,620
It's not going to always be
like that.
880
00:34:25,675 --> 00:34:28,426
- You don't think so?
- No, she will come back to us.
881
00:34:28,594 --> 00:34:31,262
- Eventually.
- Mm.
882
00:34:35,184 --> 00:34:37,852
What if it were healthy?
883
00:34:41,991 --> 00:34:45,944
[Knocks at door]
884
00:34:46,112 --> 00:34:47,579
- Hey.
- Hey.
885
00:34:47,697 --> 00:34:50,365
- You ready?
- Yep.
886
00:34:50,449 --> 00:34:55,286
- Thanks for everything, Becca.
- Of course.
887
00:34:55,421 --> 00:34:58,339
- Bye.
- Bye.
888
00:35:11,270 --> 00:35:12,971
Hi.
How are you?
889
00:35:13,105 --> 00:35:15,640
Phoebe.
You looking for Ralf?
890
00:35:15,775 --> 00:35:18,643
No, I'm actually looking for
Carla, does she work here?
891
00:35:18,778 --> 00:35:19,778
- Carla Montgomery?
- Yeah.
892
00:35:19,812 --> 00:35:22,080
Yeah, totally.
893
00:35:22,181 --> 00:35:24,199
The cocktail waitress?
Classic.
894
00:35:24,316 --> 00:35:26,701
More like the hottest
interior designer.
895
00:35:26,819 --> 00:35:31,956
I heard she did the Obama house
in Chicago and Hawaii.
896
00:35:32,074 --> 00:35:33,575
Hey, Carla?
897
00:35:33,659 --> 00:35:34,909
No, it's okay,
don't worry about it.
898
00:35:35,044 --> 00:35:37,495
I will see you again later.
899
00:35:37,630 --> 00:35:39,498
Never mind.
900
00:35:45,087 --> 00:35:48,423
Put your head down, boy
901
00:35:48,557 --> 00:35:50,558
I thought you were
on a business trip.
902
00:35:50,676 --> 00:35:51,843
I cancelled.
903
00:35:52,011 --> 00:35:54,145
Oh, yeah?
People are gonna catch on.
904
00:35:54,263 --> 00:35:56,431
[Dress unzips]
You need to relax.
905
00:35:56,565 --> 00:35:59,851
You are gonna get me fired.
906
00:35:59,935 --> 00:36:03,238
Mm, we'll be careful.
907
00:36:12,081 --> 00:36:16,167
I want you to watch.
908
00:36:22,925 --> 00:36:25,210
Shit!
What the f--?
909
00:36:25,344 --> 00:36:27,929
- What happened?
- Max just texted me
910
00:36:28,047 --> 00:36:29,547
a link to a Deadline article.
911
00:36:29,682 --> 00:36:31,766
"Joseph Gordon-Levitt to board
Rian Johnson's
912
00:36:31,884 --> 00:36:33,351
Ukraine thriller."
913
00:36:33,435 --> 00:36:36,054
Oh, my god, oh, my god.
I'm calling my agent.
914
00:36:36,222 --> 00:36:37,972
I don't understand.
915
00:36:38,107 --> 00:36:42,310
How can that be happening?
916
00:36:42,444 --> 00:36:43,895
Pick up the phone!
917
00:36:44,029 --> 00:36:47,232
- I went through your jacket.
- What?
918
00:36:47,366 --> 00:36:48,950
I checked your phone.
919
00:36:49,068 --> 00:36:52,120
I never do that.
920
00:36:52,238 --> 00:36:53,238
Okay, I don't know what you're
talking about right now.
921
00:36:53,405 --> 00:36:55,373
I saw your Uber receipt.
922
00:36:55,491 --> 00:36:57,909
After the ayahuasca
you went to Abby's.
923
00:37:01,547 --> 00:37:03,248
Right.
Yeah.
924
00:37:03,382 --> 00:37:06,634
I mean, I was...
925
00:37:06,752 --> 00:37:08,837
I was out of my mind, and yeah,
I ended up there.
926
00:37:08,921 --> 00:37:11,589
Did something happen?
927
00:37:11,724 --> 00:37:12,757
Becca, let's not do
this right now.
928
00:37:12,925 --> 00:37:14,259
I asked you a question.
929
00:37:14,343 --> 00:37:17,729
Uh...
930
00:37:17,847 --> 00:37:19,347
- It was a--it was a very--
- What?
931
00:37:19,481 --> 00:37:22,267
It was what?
932
00:37:22,401 --> 00:37:24,001
You can't even give me
a straight answer?
933
00:37:30,442 --> 00:37:34,013
- I'm really sorry.
- So you did.
934
00:37:35,531 --> 00:37:38,533
- You slept with her.
- Yes, I did.
935
00:37:38,617 --> 00:37:39,584
Look, I didn't--I didn't mean--
936
00:37:39,668 --> 00:37:41,502
- Jake, I can't.
- No, no, no, no.
937
00:37:41,620 --> 00:37:44,789
I need to be
with someone grounded, okay?
938
00:37:44,924 --> 00:37:46,284
Okay, okay,
I was tripping balls.
939
00:37:46,342 --> 00:37:47,625
I am done.
940
00:37:47,760 --> 00:37:49,460
It was your idea, I went and
did it with you and I--
941
00:37:49,628 --> 00:37:52,513
Oh, so you screwed your
ex-wife because I put a gun
942
00:37:52,631 --> 00:37:53,548
- to your head?
- No, no, I didn't
943
00:37:53,682 --> 00:37:54,716
mean it like that.
944
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:55,800
- It's my fault?
- No, I shouldn't
945
00:37:55,935 --> 00:37:57,468
have put it that way.
I'm sorry.
946
00:37:57,603 --> 00:38:01,940
- I want something serious.
- This is serious.
947
00:38:02,057 --> 00:38:04,609
We happened so fast.
948
00:38:04,693 --> 00:38:06,728
I fell for you so hard--
949
00:38:06,812 --> 00:38:11,149
I want to get married.
I want to have kids.
950
00:38:11,283 --> 00:38:12,603
You don't want that
with me, Jake,
951
00:38:12,701 --> 00:38:14,068
you probably don't
want that with anybody
952
00:38:14,203 --> 00:38:15,904
because you're still hung up
on Abby.
953
00:38:16,038 --> 00:38:17,205
No, I'm not.
954
00:38:17,323 --> 00:38:20,158
We were together 17 years, okay?
955
00:38:20,292 --> 00:38:21,960
Just get your shit.
956
00:38:22,077 --> 00:38:25,347
- I want you to go.
- No.
957
00:38:26,865 --> 00:38:28,634
Go.
958
00:38:38,344 --> 00:38:40,895
[Crying]
[Door closes]
959
00:38:47,642 --> 00:38:49,095
[Knock at door]
960
00:38:51,063 --> 00:38:53,132
Mom, I'm such an idiot.
961
00:38:54,816 --> 00:38:56,536
So here's the thing...
962
00:38:58,403 --> 00:39:02,073
- I am not going to ground you.
- You're not?
963
00:39:02,207 --> 00:39:04,208
No.
964
00:39:04,326 --> 00:39:09,213
I think ruining your own party
and having a burning... body
965
00:39:09,331 --> 00:39:12,166
is enough punishment
for one night.
966
00:39:12,301 --> 00:39:14,252
I just need to know one thing.
967
00:39:14,419 --> 00:39:16,671
I need to know if you've been
drinking before this.
968
00:39:16,805 --> 00:39:18,172
No.
969
00:39:18,307 --> 00:39:21,092
I mean, Jade and I snuck a few
beers at Ari's bar mitzvah.
970
00:39:21,226 --> 00:39:22,643
Jade.
971
00:39:22,761 --> 00:39:24,762
- I knew it.
- It wasn't very fun though.
972
00:39:24,930 --> 00:39:27,598
- I kinda had a panic attack.
- Then why today?
973
00:39:27,766 --> 00:39:29,350
- Did Jade--
- No.
974
00:39:29,434 --> 00:39:33,321
I just felt like
I needed to show off, you know?
975
00:39:33,438 --> 00:39:35,940
Your party's certainly gonna
be the talk of the school.
976
00:39:36,108 --> 00:39:37,108
Thank god.
977
00:39:37,776 --> 00:39:41,645
It was all so ridiculous.
***
978
00:39:43,916 --> 00:39:45,750
The cake was good though.
979
00:39:45,851 --> 00:39:48,304
You always make
the best cakes.
980
00:39:49,838 --> 00:39:52,757
Would you lie with me?
981
00:39:52,841 --> 00:39:55,092
I would love to lie with you.
982
00:40:01,466 --> 00:40:03,134
I do remember
Princess Jasmine.
983
00:40:03,235 --> 00:40:05,136
- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
984
00:40:05,304 --> 00:40:08,856
It was raining, and I thought
the party was ruined,
985
00:40:08,974 --> 00:40:11,309
and then she came swooping in
out of thin air.
986
00:40:11,476 --> 00:40:12,810
- [Laughs]
- Like you guys conjured her up
987
00:40:12,945 --> 00:40:14,812
or something.
988
00:40:14,947 --> 00:40:19,400
Princess Jasmine was
20 years old and way hungover.
989
00:40:19,534 --> 00:40:21,569
- Nuh-uh.
- Yea-uh.
990
00:40:21,703 --> 00:40:24,739
She came to the house and your
dad and I snuck her inside
991
00:40:24,823 --> 00:40:28,626
for the surprise, and she ran to
the bathroom and started puking.
992
00:40:28,710 --> 00:40:31,545
- Gross.
- It's so gross.
993
00:40:31,663 --> 00:40:34,966
She was such a mess.
I was holding her hair,
994
00:40:35,083 --> 00:40:38,469
your dad was force-feeding
coffee, and...
995
00:40:38,587 --> 00:40:40,671
And then I just hid
in the bathroom with her
996
00:40:40,839 --> 00:40:42,757
till she sobered up.
997
00:40:42,841 --> 00:40:45,726
- Crazy.
- Mm.
998
00:40:45,844 --> 00:40:47,547
I didn't even notice.
999
00:40:49,431 --> 00:40:54,018
Well, she was a pretty
okay Princess in the end.
1000
00:40:56,238 --> 00:41:00,358
Yeah, hi, it's Jake Novak
calling you, Mark.
1001
00:41:00,492 --> 00:41:04,028
Uh, yeah, I'm a friend of Becca
Riley's and she told me
1002
00:41:04,196 --> 00:41:07,832
to give him a call about maybe
directing Blood Sisters, so.
1003
00:41:07,949 --> 00:41:10,601
Yeah, Jake Novak.
1004
00:41:10,702 --> 00:41:14,255
Sure, I'll hold, I'm gonna put
you on Bluetooth, okay?
1005
00:41:18,377 --> 00:41:19,915
[Phone ringing]
1006
00:41:24,299 --> 00:41:25,683
Lyla.
1007
00:41:25,801 --> 00:41:28,052
You pull this
disappearing act again,
1008
00:41:28,136 --> 00:41:30,688
I am going to punch you
in the vagina.
1009
00:41:30,806 --> 00:41:33,140
I'd be delighted, but you'd
have to come to Portland.
1010
00:41:34,225 --> 00:41:35,643
What?
1011
00:41:35,727 --> 00:41:38,312
What are you doing in Portland,
you crazy woman?
1012
00:41:38,447 --> 00:41:39,947
We stopped here, you know,
because of Eric
1013
00:41:40,065 --> 00:41:43,067
- and oncoming water wars--
- Okay.
1014
00:41:43,201 --> 00:41:44,902
- And?
- It's so great.
1015
00:41:45,037 --> 00:41:46,654
Portlandia doesn't
even do it justice.
1016
00:41:46,788 --> 00:41:49,240
I have rented
the most beautiful house,
1017
00:41:49,408 --> 00:41:50,825
and I've convinced
Dan to come here, and...
1018
00:41:50,959 --> 00:41:53,244
There's a restaurant
that I think he's gonna love.
1019
00:41:53,378 --> 00:41:55,996
Okay, so you just disappeared
and bought a new life?
1020
00:41:56,131 --> 00:41:57,915
You told me to find
what makes me happy.
1021
00:41:58,083 --> 00:42:00,334
As it turns out, it's my kids
being happy
1022
00:42:00,419 --> 00:42:03,054
and small batch
artisanal pickles.
1023
00:42:03,922 --> 00:42:05,506
Oh, shit.
1024
00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:08,426
That's amazing, Lyla.
1025
00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:11,812
When are you gonna
get your ass down here?
1026
00:42:24,236 --> 00:42:28,736
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
1027
00:42:28,786 --> 00:42:33,336
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
73395
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