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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,806 I'm asking you, Nellie Buller, will you... Mummy! 2 00:00:04,816 --> 00:00:06,546 Will you marry me? 3 00:00:08,100 --> 00:00:10,979 Yes! Oh, yes! 4 00:00:10,980 --> 00:00:13,259 Mwa! We're engaged! 5 00:00:13,260 --> 00:00:15,298 We're engaged! 6 00:00:15,323 --> 00:00:41,202 Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells http://UKsubtitles.ru. 7 00:00:52,580 --> 00:00:55,619 Careful of my hair. It's OK, Grandma. Careful. 8 00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:59,139 Pass me your handbag. Be careful of my nails. 9 00:00:59,140 --> 00:01:00,979 Be careful! 10 00:01:00,980 --> 00:01:02,420 Ow! 11 00:01:02,420 --> 00:01:05,540 Here's your dress. Be careful of my dress! Be careful! 12 00:01:05,541 --> 00:01:08,020 I am being careful. Be careful. 13 00:01:08,020 --> 00:01:11,939 Of your fingers... Ah! 14 00:01:11,940 --> 00:01:14,099 Now, remember, brave face... 15 00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:16,139 Brave face. 16 00:01:16,140 --> 00:01:20,140 Brave face. 17 00:01:21,220 --> 00:01:24,539 Here comes the bride! Careful, careful! 18 00:01:24,540 --> 00:01:28,219 Careful. Careful. 19 00:01:28,220 --> 00:01:31,419 Boys! You look nice. 20 00:01:31,420 --> 00:01:33,660 We look like tits. 21 00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:37,660 Hello, Mum. Or should I say... 22 00:01:38,060 --> 00:01:40,100 .."The bride to be"?! 23 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,499 She's nervous. Right. 24 00:01:42,500 --> 00:01:45,979 Has Dad had his brain reprogrammed? Pardon? 25 00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:48,379 Martin, you can relax now. 26 00:01:48,380 --> 00:01:52,219 Ooh! Hello, bambinos! 27 00:01:52,220 --> 00:01:55,459 Be careful. Put it down there... OK. 28 00:01:55,460 --> 00:01:57,779 Careful... Please! 29 00:01:57,780 --> 00:02:00,179 I hope she's all right. 30 00:02:00,180 --> 00:02:02,819 So, go on, how was she? 31 00:02:02,820 --> 00:02:04,979 Ten-minute drive. Two toilet breaks. 32 00:02:04,980 --> 00:02:08,099 Really? One at the garage and one behind a hedge. 33 00:02:08,100 --> 00:02:10,979 A hedge?! Quite a low hedge. Blimey. 34 00:02:10,980 --> 00:02:14,980 Yes. Blimey. Someone tell me how we're going to get through today. 35 00:02:16,060 --> 00:02:18,659 Heroin? Please. Love, it'll be fine. 36 00:02:18,660 --> 00:02:22,659 It won't be fine! My mother is marrying Mr Morris - 37 00:02:22,660 --> 00:02:25,339 the worst man in the world. The universe. 38 00:02:25,340 --> 00:02:28,699 Not if she suddenly comes out as a lesbian. Nice image. 39 00:02:28,700 --> 00:02:32,700 Martin, she won't be coming out as a lesbian. Well, then, we're buggered! 40 00:02:33,380 --> 00:02:36,619 My God! 41 00:02:36,620 --> 00:02:39,339 Hello? 42 00:02:39,340 --> 00:02:41,620 Ye... OK, love. 43 00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:45,620 See you soon. Val. She's doing Grandma's makeup. 44 00:02:46,220 --> 00:02:49,259 Could that phone be any louder? It's so your dad can hear it. 45 00:02:49,260 --> 00:02:51,660 It's so I can hear it. And can you? 46 00:02:51,661 --> 00:02:54,820 When it rings, I'll let you know. Perfect. 47 00:02:56,860 --> 00:03:00,860 OK, brave face, everyone, brave face. Brave face. 48 00:03:01,940 --> 00:03:05,940 I feel much better now. 49 00:03:06,540 --> 00:03:09,139 Smoked salmon and cream cheese... 50 00:03:09,140 --> 00:03:12,739 It's lovely, Jackie. Amazing. Leave it. 51 00:03:12,740 --> 00:03:15,219 Yeah, leave it. Ohh... Boys! 52 00:03:15,220 --> 00:03:17,379 Skill McGill! Ohh... 53 00:03:17,380 --> 00:03:20,420 And, you know, people can just help themselves... 54 00:03:20,420 --> 00:03:23,859 Really lovely. Another sherry, please. 55 00:03:23,860 --> 00:03:27,860 Another one? You haven't had your breakfast yet. Another sherry. 56 00:03:28,220 --> 00:03:32,219 OK. We don't want you conking out before the wedding. Here. 57 00:03:32,220 --> 00:03:35,459 Your 8am sherry coming right up, madam. 58 00:03:35,460 --> 00:03:39,460 Oh, Mum, I wonder what Mr Morris is doing right now. 59 00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:43,859 Masturbating? What? I bet he's sitting there, 60 00:03:43,860 --> 00:03:47,019 with a sherry, just like you, thinking all about the big day. 61 00:03:47,020 --> 00:03:49,379 Whilst masturbating. 62 00:03:49,380 --> 00:03:53,380 Yes, well, he's a very thoughtful person. 63 00:03:53,780 --> 00:03:55,859 Is he? Is he?! 64 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:59,860 Oh, yes. One time, he... 65 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:02,819 Well, go on. 66 00:04:02,820 --> 00:04:06,820 No, I can't remember when he was thoughtful. 67 00:04:07,740 --> 00:04:09,939 Well? Oh, my God. 68 00:04:09,940 --> 00:04:12,819 How do I look? Just like me and Adam - a tit. 69 00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:16,579 The third tit. Ignore them, Martin. You look really... 70 00:04:16,580 --> 00:04:18,619 Tittish... handsome. 71 00:04:18,620 --> 00:04:22,620 Ahh. Doesn't Martin look handsome, Mum? 72 00:04:22,980 --> 00:04:24,939 In a way. 73 00:04:24,940 --> 00:04:26,859 Excellent. 74 00:04:26,860 --> 00:04:30,579 Erm, Mum, can we have a quick word? Yeah. What? 75 00:04:30,580 --> 00:04:32,819 What? 76 00:04:32,820 --> 00:04:35,699 Mum, help yourself. 77 00:04:35,700 --> 00:04:38,899 And no more sherry! 78 00:04:38,900 --> 00:04:42,139 Hope she's all right. What do you want? You know what we want. 79 00:04:42,140 --> 00:04:45,539 Do we have to wear these clothes? Yes, it's what Mr Morris... 80 00:04:45,540 --> 00:04:48,499 Little Miss Hitler... ..wanted you to wear. 81 00:04:48,500 --> 00:04:51,459 But we look like little twins. Stop it. Little pimps. 82 00:04:51,460 --> 00:04:55,460 Martin, tell them they look OK. Do I look like a pimp?! No-one does! 83 00:04:55,780 --> 00:04:59,299 I better not look like a pimp! 84 00:04:59,300 --> 00:05:03,300 Where are you going? Look, I really don't have time for this now. 85 00:05:03,340 --> 00:05:05,899 We're not page boys, are we? Of course not. 86 00:05:05,900 --> 00:05:08,259 We'd better not be. Can I go now? 87 00:05:08,260 --> 00:05:10,819 I look like a pimp! Ohh... 88 00:05:10,820 --> 00:05:13,499 You wan' buy a piece of ass? Mmm... Mmm... 89 00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:15,979 Goodbye. Goodbye. 90 00:05:15,980 --> 00:05:18,899 Oh... 91 00:05:18,900 --> 00:05:21,019 Ooh, don't you look snazzy! 92 00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:24,299 So do you, sexy lady... Are you all right? 93 00:05:24,300 --> 00:05:26,739 I'm being a pimp. Oh. Very nice. 94 00:05:26,740 --> 00:05:30,059 Whoa! Shake ya booty! Yeah, not right now, Martin. 95 00:05:30,060 --> 00:05:32,299 How's Jackie? The usual... 96 00:05:32,300 --> 00:05:36,300 Thank you, Martin. Hello, love. 97 00:05:36,980 --> 00:05:39,260 Ooh. Today's the day! 98 00:05:39,260 --> 00:05:41,939 I know. I'll be all right. 99 00:05:41,940 --> 00:05:44,179 Hi, Auntie Val. Hi, boys... 100 00:05:44,180 --> 00:05:47,699 Aw, don't they look sweet? Like two little page boys. 101 00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:49,299 See?! 102 00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:52,939 Like two very adult, grown up men. 103 00:05:52,940 --> 00:05:55,339 Where's the blushing bride? 104 00:05:55,340 --> 00:05:58,179 Mum! Mum?! 105 00:05:58,180 --> 00:06:00,219 She won't be long. 106 00:06:00,220 --> 00:06:03,499 Just finishing off her 80th barrel of alcohol. 107 00:06:03,500 --> 00:06:07,299 Hello, Valerie. Hello, Mrs Buller. 108 00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:09,499 Mazel tov! Oh, thank you. 109 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:12,299 Come to make me look beautiful, have you? 110 00:06:12,300 --> 00:06:15,419 Don't be silly. You don't look a day over 21! Ohh! 111 00:06:15,420 --> 00:06:18,699 And you don't look a day over 55. 112 00:06:18,700 --> 00:06:20,539 Oh. 113 00:06:20,540 --> 00:06:23,699 Is she 55? No, Mum, she's 49. 114 00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:27,419 She looks older. Sorry, Val, she's a bit... 115 00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:29,899 What? OHH! YOU SHIT! 116 00:06:29,900 --> 00:06:31,939 Skill McGill! What happened?! 117 00:06:31,940 --> 00:06:34,739 He put water down my pants! Someone's had an accident! 118 00:06:34,740 --> 00:06:37,779 Stupid wazzocks. You better not have ruined his suit! 119 00:06:37,780 --> 00:06:40,379 Sorry, Mum. Can you calm down?! 120 00:06:40,380 --> 00:06:44,380 Can everyone please calm down?! It's Grandma's sodding wedding! 121 00:06:48,420 --> 00:06:50,659 OK, so... 122 00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:52,779 Argh! 123 00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:55,859 Death by phone. 124 00:06:55,860 --> 00:06:57,939 Hello? What? 125 00:06:57,940 --> 00:07:01,219 Oh, yes... Thanks, thank you. 126 00:07:01,220 --> 00:07:04,499 Mum, your car will be here in a hour, so... An hour! 127 00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:08,259 All right, Mrs Buller, let's get your skates on. Martin. Help Val. 128 00:07:08,260 --> 00:07:11,619 I'd help that sweet piece of ass any time! Please stop doing that. 129 00:07:11,620 --> 00:07:13,339 Please stop doing that. 130 00:07:13,340 --> 00:07:15,779 I'm soaking... Oh, shame. 131 00:07:15,780 --> 00:07:18,899 Oh, get that, would you? 132 00:07:18,900 --> 00:07:22,900 Yes, Miss. Come on, Mum. 133 00:07:23,340 --> 00:07:25,379 Good morning, gentlemen. 134 00:07:25,380 --> 00:07:28,419 Hi, Mr Morris. Found a parking space, did you? 135 00:07:28,420 --> 00:07:31,579 Eh... She's not around, is she? 136 00:07:31,580 --> 00:07:33,739 She? The woman. 137 00:07:33,740 --> 00:07:37,139 It's bad luck to see the woman before the wedding. 138 00:07:37,140 --> 00:07:39,779 Um, no, the woman's upstairs. 139 00:07:39,780 --> 00:07:42,139 Well, come outside, then, come on. 140 00:07:42,140 --> 00:07:46,140 What? Layabouts... 141 00:07:48,340 --> 00:07:51,939 Now, then, I've got something I want to give your grandmother. 142 00:07:51,940 --> 00:07:55,179 A noose? It's something very precious. 143 00:07:55,180 --> 00:07:57,859 I'd like her to wear it at the wedding. 144 00:07:57,860 --> 00:08:00,579 Oh, right. That's nice of you... Yeah. 145 00:08:00,580 --> 00:08:03,899 You do know you're taking me to the synagogue today? Are we? 146 00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:07,900 I don't want you looking like a pair of punk rockers. Tuck your shirt in! 147 00:08:08,660 --> 00:08:11,139 Thank you for the sexual assault! 148 00:08:11,140 --> 00:08:15,140 And do your button up. No-one wants to see your scrawny turkey neck. 149 00:08:15,340 --> 00:08:17,579 All right! What about you? 150 00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:20,219 What about me? I'm in my comfies. 151 00:08:20,220 --> 00:08:22,099 Your comfies? 152 00:08:22,100 --> 00:08:24,259 Listen, when I'm in my full regalia, 153 00:08:24,260 --> 00:08:27,219 I shall look like a prince, I tell you. A prince! 154 00:08:27,220 --> 00:08:30,179 OK. Just a minute... 155 00:08:30,180 --> 00:08:32,219 Have you soiled yourself? 156 00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:34,259 What? He has soiled himself. 157 00:08:34,260 --> 00:08:36,459 That's all I need - a bottom soiler. 158 00:08:36,460 --> 00:08:40,339 You'd better not soil your bottom when you enter the house of God. 159 00:08:40,340 --> 00:08:42,379 OK, I'll try not to, Mr Morris. 160 00:08:42,380 --> 00:08:45,259 I'm a pillar of the community. Pillock of the community. 161 00:08:45,260 --> 00:08:47,619 I beg your pardon? See you later! 162 00:08:47,620 --> 00:08:51,620 I do know what you're doing! 163 00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:58,339 Oh, isn't that beautiful? 164 00:08:58,340 --> 00:09:01,459 Isn't it? Actually, it is pretty. 165 00:09:01,460 --> 00:09:04,259 I told you he was a thoughtful man. 166 00:09:04,260 --> 00:09:08,260 Read the note. 167 00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:12,300 "Dear Nellie..." Aw. "DEAR Nellie..." 168 00:09:12,380 --> 00:09:14,659 "Please accept this necklace 169 00:09:14,660 --> 00:09:17,859 "as a token of my affection on our wedding day." 170 00:09:17,860 --> 00:09:21,860 "On our wedding day"! Ooh! I'm so excited now! 171 00:09:22,620 --> 00:09:26,419 "It would truly mean the world to me if you would wear it." 172 00:09:26,420 --> 00:09:29,779 Of course I'll wear it, Lou! 173 00:09:29,780 --> 00:09:33,780 "Even though the necklace originally belonged to my dead wife... 174 00:09:35,100 --> 00:09:37,939 "..and she wore it every day of her life..." 175 00:09:37,940 --> 00:09:41,179 I thought I'd seen it before. 176 00:09:41,180 --> 00:09:44,019 "Try not to think of her when you put it on." 177 00:09:44,020 --> 00:09:48,020 "Think only of me, and not me being with her,... 178 00:09:49,020 --> 00:09:51,059 "which I was, 179 00:09:51,060 --> 00:09:53,659 "for 60 years." 180 00:09:53,660 --> 00:09:56,939 "Yours, Lou." 181 00:09:56,940 --> 00:10:00,940 What a thoughtful, thoughtful man. 182 00:10:02,860 --> 00:10:04,899 You checked the car's coming? Yes. 183 00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:08,339 You've spoken to the Rabbi? Yes. You've put bleach in the loos? Yes, 184 00:10:08,340 --> 00:10:12,340 after I'd had a sip. Lovely. 185 00:10:12,580 --> 00:10:16,580 There. You look gorgeous, Jackie. Like a million, billion dollars. 186 00:10:16,660 --> 00:10:20,579 You're not being a pimp again, are you? Once a pimp, always a pimp! 187 00:10:20,580 --> 00:10:22,619 Martin! 188 00:10:22,620 --> 00:10:25,899 Do you think she's going to be all right? Yeah... 189 00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:28,619 Who? Lady Gaga. Who do you think?! 190 00:10:28,620 --> 00:10:31,019 Oh, she'll be fine. Really? 191 00:10:31,020 --> 00:10:34,099 Well, look at you, you're fine. What's that supposed to mean? 192 00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:37,579 I don't know, really. Just thought I should say... some words. 193 00:10:37,580 --> 00:10:41,580 Some words... Very helpful. 194 00:10:42,740 --> 00:10:45,099 We have a good marriage, don't we? 195 00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:48,259 What? Of course we do. And you know I love you. 196 00:10:48,260 --> 00:10:50,499 Yes, of course. 197 00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:52,539 And...? 198 00:10:52,540 --> 00:10:54,459 And...? 199 00:10:54,460 --> 00:10:58,059 I say "I love you" and you say... 200 00:10:58,060 --> 00:11:00,139 Oh, sorry. Likewise. 201 00:11:00,140 --> 00:11:04,140 Likewise? I love you likewise. 202 00:11:05,020 --> 00:11:08,779 I love you likewise too. 203 00:11:08,780 --> 00:11:12,459 Actually, you could have just used the word "similarly". 204 00:11:12,460 --> 00:11:15,299 Mum? Yes? Grandma's crying. 205 00:11:15,300 --> 00:11:19,099 Oh... 206 00:11:19,100 --> 00:11:23,100 Boys, who's Lady Gaga? 207 00:11:23,500 --> 00:11:25,339 Mummy? 208 00:11:25,340 --> 00:11:27,619 Oh, Jackie... 209 00:11:27,620 --> 00:11:29,659 Are you all right? 210 00:11:29,660 --> 00:11:33,059 I'm OK, darling. I'm OK. 211 00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:36,499 What are you...? Oh, Mum. 212 00:11:36,500 --> 00:11:40,500 I wonder what Sidney is thinking of me now. 213 00:11:40,740 --> 00:11:43,299 Don't be silly. 214 00:11:43,300 --> 00:11:46,179 I'm sure Dad's really... 215 00:11:46,180 --> 00:11:48,219 happy for you. 216 00:11:48,220 --> 00:11:50,299 Really? 217 00:11:50,300 --> 00:11:54,300 I am doing the right thing, aren't I? What? 218 00:11:54,540 --> 00:11:57,299 Marrying Lou. 219 00:11:57,300 --> 00:12:00,979 As long as you're happy and sure. 220 00:12:00,980 --> 00:12:02,579 Yes. 221 00:12:02,580 --> 00:12:06,580 You are sure, aren't you, Mummy? 222 00:12:06,940 --> 00:12:09,139 We've run out of bog roll. 223 00:12:09,140 --> 00:12:10,939 Sorry... 224 00:12:10,940 --> 00:12:14,940 That's when that donkey bit Sidney on the chin! Ha! Ha, ha... 225 00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:23,500 Mum, do you remember that donkey? I do. It did not like your father. 226 00:12:24,940 --> 00:12:26,539 No... 227 00:12:26,540 --> 00:12:29,819 It did its toilet all over him. 228 00:12:29,820 --> 00:12:33,100 Yeah... 229 00:12:46,620 --> 00:12:50,620 Right. 230 00:12:51,020 --> 00:12:54,260 Time to get remarried. 231 00:12:56,300 --> 00:12:58,739 Hello, Jackie, you look nice. 232 00:12:58,740 --> 00:13:02,419 Hi, Jim. I thought you were the car. 233 00:13:02,420 --> 00:13:05,019 You thought I was a... car? 234 00:13:05,020 --> 00:13:07,739 Is it important? We're really busy... 235 00:13:07,740 --> 00:13:10,859 Yes, of course, getting ready to go to the mosque. 236 00:13:10,860 --> 00:13:13,059 Synagogue. Ooh, yes. No. 237 00:13:13,060 --> 00:13:17,060 We wanted to give your mother a little something for her nuptials. 238 00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:22,300 Oh... Wilson... OK. 239 00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:25,739 R-Remain... 240 00:13:25,740 --> 00:13:29,619 Um... 241 00:13:29,620 --> 00:13:32,659 Blimey. Er, thanks, Jim. 242 00:13:32,660 --> 00:13:34,699 Yeah. What is it? 243 00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:38,700 It's an original 18th-century 24-piece porcelain tea set. 244 00:13:40,580 --> 00:13:43,499 Is it? Yes. It's been in the family for years. 245 00:13:43,500 --> 00:13:46,019 Used to belong to Marie Antoinette. 246 00:13:46,020 --> 00:13:47,339 Really? 247 00:13:47,340 --> 00:13:49,940 I was going to donate it to the British Museum... 248 00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:55,779 Oh! 249 00:13:55,780 --> 00:13:57,779 Ohh! 250 00:13:57,780 --> 00:13:59,476 Oh, dear. 251 00:14:00,613 --> 00:14:02,353 Hurry up, Val. Nearly there. 252 00:14:02,407 --> 00:14:06,407 Where is the car? It's meant to be here! Well, hurry up! 253 00:14:07,047 --> 00:14:10,547 Ohh... Calm down, Jackie. I can't calm down! 254 00:14:10,602 --> 00:14:14,321 Take your hot ass in the kitchen, make me a hot cup of tea! 255 00:14:14,322 --> 00:14:17,201 Ladies and gentleman, may I present 256 00:14:17,202 --> 00:14:19,922 our beautiful bride. 257 00:14:27,202 --> 00:14:31,202 Well, what do you think? 258 00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,241 Careful! Mum, let me help... 259 00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:37,522 Careful of my hair! 260 00:14:37,522 --> 00:14:41,121 That's it, Nellie... Careful of my dress! 261 00:14:41,122 --> 00:14:45,122 Try and find your mother some heroin. 262 00:14:45,162 --> 00:14:49,162 Right. Time to get the lunatic. 263 00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:05,241 I wonder if this is the right house! 264 00:15:05,242 --> 00:15:09,002 Once again, excellent parking skills. Excellent. 265 00:15:11,362 --> 00:15:14,841 Please be lying dead on the floor. In a pool of blood. 266 00:15:14,842 --> 00:15:16,882 Don't come in. 267 00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:19,361 Thank you. All in white? 268 00:15:19,362 --> 00:15:22,921 The prince! 269 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:24,961 Right. 270 00:15:24,962 --> 00:15:27,161 What's so funny? Nothing. 271 00:15:27,162 --> 00:15:30,361 What's with the bin bag? You'll see. 272 00:15:30,362 --> 00:15:32,681 Recycling Grandma. 273 00:15:32,682 --> 00:15:35,321 No, no. We're not going in that. 274 00:15:35,322 --> 00:15:37,681 We're going in this. Are we? 275 00:15:37,682 --> 00:15:41,041 It's my wedding day and I wish to travel in my own vehicle. 276 00:15:41,042 --> 00:15:44,001 The deathmobile. Come on, get your legs in that. 277 00:15:44,002 --> 00:15:45,361 What?! 278 00:15:45,362 --> 00:15:49,001 I'm not having you soiling your grubby bottom in my car. 279 00:15:49,002 --> 00:15:52,681 Now, come on, get your legs in. Great idea. Go on, Adam. 280 00:15:52,682 --> 00:15:55,481 God... That's it. 281 00:15:55,482 --> 00:15:58,001 That's it. 282 00:15:58,002 --> 00:16:01,641 Good. Ooh, nice fit. 283 00:16:01,642 --> 00:16:05,642 Now, get in. Go on pusface, hop in. 284 00:16:09,562 --> 00:16:13,562 And no soiling! 285 00:16:16,042 --> 00:16:18,401 Oh, come on! 286 00:16:18,402 --> 00:16:20,921 Can you drive any slower?! 287 00:16:20,922 --> 00:16:24,922 Silence! 288 00:16:25,722 --> 00:16:28,641 Finally! Wait. 289 00:16:28,642 --> 00:16:30,681 Have you soiled yourself? 290 00:16:30,682 --> 00:16:33,441 Not yet, Mr Morris. Good boy. 291 00:16:33,442 --> 00:16:37,442 Yes, good boy. Oh, get off! 292 00:16:37,882 --> 00:16:40,041 Where the hell have you been? 293 00:16:40,042 --> 00:16:43,481 Average speed of vehicle - 1.5 miles per hour. 294 00:16:43,482 --> 00:16:47,281 Bloody thing! Right, where's the woman? 295 00:16:47,282 --> 00:16:50,722 You were in a bin bag. I was in a bin bag. 296 00:16:52,922 --> 00:16:55,161 The stupid berks are here. 297 00:16:55,162 --> 00:16:59,162 Where have you...? Have we got time to buy a crossbow? Or make one? 298 00:16:59,522 --> 00:17:02,761 Come on! Wait, Martin... What?! 299 00:17:02,762 --> 00:17:04,721 Oh, yes. 300 00:17:04,722 --> 00:17:07,361 Erm, I need to tell you something, 301 00:17:07,362 --> 00:17:11,362 but... please don't kill me... OK. 302 00:17:12,042 --> 00:17:14,401 You ARE page boys. WHAT?! 303 00:17:14,402 --> 00:17:17,801 Sorry! I bloody knew it! I didn't want to tell you earlier. 304 00:17:17,802 --> 00:17:20,841 But it'll be fine, just fine... Coming, Mummy! Mum! 305 00:17:20,842 --> 00:17:23,521 Great. We're page boys. Little page boys! 306 00:17:23,522 --> 00:17:27,161 Stop fussing. Just walk behind your Grandma and hold up her dress. 307 00:17:27,162 --> 00:17:29,281 Hold up her dress?! It's an honour. 308 00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:32,281 Yes. For three-year-old girls! Mr Goodman? 309 00:17:32,282 --> 00:17:36,282 Chin up, lads. Oh, pissing shit-buckets! 310 00:17:38,402 --> 00:17:42,402 Shalom. 311 00:17:54,842 --> 00:17:58,842 I wish that stupid git would play something we bleeding know. 312 00:18:05,322 --> 00:18:09,322 Here she comes. 313 00:18:23,482 --> 00:18:26,121 Hmm. 314 00:18:26,122 --> 00:18:29,801 Page boys. Little page boys. 315 00:18:29,802 --> 00:18:32,681 This is really happening. 316 00:18:32,682 --> 00:18:36,682 Yeah. Yeah... 317 00:18:57,802 --> 00:19:01,281 Well, Lou. How do I look? 318 00:19:01,282 --> 00:19:05,282 Like you, only more done up. 319 00:19:06,522 --> 00:19:10,241 Ladies and gentlemen, what a wonderful, truly beautiful occasion 320 00:19:10,242 --> 00:19:13,281 we have before us here today. Literally hell. 321 00:19:13,282 --> 00:19:16,721 Nellie and Lou, in the very prime of their life,... 322 00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:19,201 One way of putting it. ..finding true love again 323 00:19:19,202 --> 00:19:21,441 and declaring it here before God... 324 00:19:21,442 --> 00:19:24,201 Speak up! Speak up! I said "finding true love". 325 00:19:24,202 --> 00:19:26,121 Oh, that. Love... 326 00:19:26,122 --> 00:19:29,801 It is plain to see that the Lord Almighty, HaShem, 327 00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:33,201 has truly blessed these two special people here today. 328 00:19:33,202 --> 00:19:35,241 Wouldn't you agree? 329 00:19:35,242 --> 00:19:37,841 NO! 330 00:19:37,842 --> 00:19:41,842 No! Wilson! No! 331 00:19:41,962 --> 00:19:44,801 Oh, I'm sorry, 332 00:19:44,802 --> 00:19:48,802 Your Majesty. Where do dogs sit? 333 00:19:50,922 --> 00:19:53,841 No dogs! No Wilsons! 334 00:19:53,842 --> 00:19:57,842 Yes... 335 00:19:59,442 --> 00:20:03,442 Place the ring on Nellie's finger, Lou, and repeat after me. 336 00:20:03,482 --> 00:20:07,482 Harei at mekudeshet, k'dat Moshe... 337 00:20:08,442 --> 00:20:11,201 Sh-Shalom. Shalom. Shalom... 338 00:20:11,202 --> 00:20:12,641 Shh. 339 00:20:12,642 --> 00:20:16,241 Have they done the sacrifice yet? 340 00:20:16,242 --> 00:20:19,281 ..a love that will sustain and nourish you both 341 00:20:19,282 --> 00:20:21,361 as you enter this holy covenant. 342 00:20:21,362 --> 00:20:24,201 And now for the moment you've all been waiting for. 343 00:20:24,202 --> 00:20:28,202 Dreading. The wedding vows. 344 00:20:29,042 --> 00:20:31,441 Do you, Lou Anthony Morris... 345 00:20:31,442 --> 00:20:34,281 Please, Lord, let him die. Please die... 346 00:20:34,282 --> 00:20:36,481 Heart attack... Liver failure... 347 00:20:36,482 --> 00:20:38,761 ..to be your wife? I do. 348 00:20:38,762 --> 00:20:41,641 Shit on it. 349 00:20:41,642 --> 00:20:45,441 Thank you, Lou. That's my bit done. Your go now. 350 00:20:45,442 --> 00:20:48,441 Do you, Nellie... No, Grandma. Please... 351 00:20:48,442 --> 00:20:51,401 ..enter into this holy covenant of affection and truth 352 00:20:51,402 --> 00:20:54,001 and take Lou Anthony Morris 353 00:20:54,002 --> 00:20:58,002 to be your husband? 354 00:21:05,082 --> 00:21:06,961 Nellie? 355 00:21:06,962 --> 00:21:09,241 Well, get on with it! 356 00:21:09,242 --> 00:21:11,641 I... 357 00:21:11,642 --> 00:21:14,841 I... 358 00:21:14,842 --> 00:21:17,601 I... Mum? Mummy?! 359 00:21:17,602 --> 00:21:19,761 Mrs Buller? Mummy?! 360 00:21:19,762 --> 00:21:21,601 Grandma?! What's going on? 361 00:21:21,602 --> 00:21:24,361 Mummy? Mummy! Grandma? 362 00:21:24,362 --> 00:21:27,561 Mum, can you hear me? Oh, God... 363 00:21:27,562 --> 00:21:30,201 Call an ambulance! Shimon, ambulance! 364 00:21:30,202 --> 00:21:34,202 Pull yourself together, woman. Call a bleeding ambulance! 365 00:21:38,282 --> 00:21:42,282 Oh, God... It's all right, Jackie. That's it. It's OK... 366 00:21:43,002 --> 00:21:46,161 Grandma? Grandma? You have to let her breathe. 367 00:21:46,162 --> 00:21:50,162 She's not going to die, is she, Mum? Oh, Jonny... 368 00:21:51,082 --> 00:21:54,681 We love you, Mum. We love you, Grandma. Love you, Grandma. 369 00:21:54,682 --> 00:21:57,761 Stay in there, Nellie. How long to the hospital?! 370 00:21:57,762 --> 00:22:00,441 Not long. You hear that, Mum? 371 00:22:00,442 --> 00:22:04,442 Nearly at the hospital, they'll look after you. Yeah, Grandma. 372 00:22:04,682 --> 00:22:07,561 She's moving. Mum? Nellie? 373 00:22:07,562 --> 00:22:11,241 She wants to say something. 374 00:22:11,242 --> 00:22:15,242 Jackie... Mummy... I need to talk to you. 375 00:22:15,442 --> 00:22:18,641 Of course, Mum. Anything. I'm not ill. 376 00:22:18,642 --> 00:22:20,921 No, of course you're not ill. 377 00:22:20,922 --> 00:22:23,642 No,... I'm not ill. 378 00:22:23,642 --> 00:22:26,521 What? I'm pretending. 379 00:22:26,522 --> 00:22:29,761 Pretending? No, she's confused. Wait, wait... 380 00:22:29,762 --> 00:22:32,122 Pretending? Yes. 381 00:22:32,122 --> 00:22:34,641 So you're not... dying? 382 00:22:34,642 --> 00:22:37,242 No. Not even a bit? No. 383 00:22:37,242 --> 00:22:41,242 You faked a heart attack? At your wedding? In front of everyone? 384 00:22:41,442 --> 00:22:44,481 I couldn't think of what else to do. 385 00:22:44,482 --> 00:22:48,482 What else to do? I was not going to spend the rest of my life 386 00:22:49,202 --> 00:22:53,202 with that jumped-up little arsehole. 387 00:22:53,322 --> 00:22:57,322 You mean...? She's got to keep her mask on. 388 00:23:04,442 --> 00:23:08,356 I'm free! I'm free! 389 00:23:11,697 --> 00:23:14,782 Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells http://UKsubtitles.ru. 390 00:23:14,832 --> 00:23:19,382 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 28512

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