All language subtitles for The Twelve Tasks of Asterix (1976)

In the year 50 B. C.
all Gaul, now known as

France, was covered with
impenetrable forest...

where calm peace and quite
reigned supreme, only the birds...

Hey wait a moment! Wait a
moment! I said the year 50 B. C!

In the year 50 B. C. all Gaul was
covered with impenetrable forests,

where calm peace and
quite reigned supreme.

Julius Caesar after much fierce fighting
had succeeded in conquering Gaul...

intending to set the seal of Romans
civilisation on his latest conquest.

Yes, all Gaul, now known as
France, was occupied by the Romans.

Well no not quiet, somewhere in
Armorica, a little village was...

holding out against the invaders. A
little village surrounded by Romans.

The brave people of this village.
Do I really need to introduce them?

Hands up in the house
who hasn't met them yet.

Ah, I see all right! I'll
make the introductions.

This big hut is the home of the
undisputed chief of the village.

The formidable Vitalstatistix.

Darling, please darling, it's
me ought to be up on that shield!

I'm the chief after all!

I've got to go out shopping, you can
have your shield back later, meanwhile...

you tidy the place up a bit, it's
like a wild boars sty! Come on you two!

This is Cacofonix, the village bard,
people don't always appreciate...

his talents, sometimes express their
feelings in a tactful delicate way.

Ah here comes Dogmatix, the village
mascot and a great friend of Obelix.

He help him delivering menhirs.

Dogmatix, come here Dogmatix, I'm
teaching him to retrieve menhirs Asterix...

he could be a big help in my work.

You know Obelix it isn't that I don't
think that dog's very intelligent...

but I do sometimes wonder if he
isn't a rather small to carry menhirs.

The voice of reason you have just
heard belongs to the renowned Asterix!

The best warrior in the village! The
famous Asterix whose adventures are...

on sale in all the best bookshops and
had been translated into every language.

Salute! Guten tag! Hello! Hi!
Konnichiwa! Buenas dia! Salam!

Bonjour!

But you may ask yourself how did this
little village with its handful...

of warriors manage to hold out against
the all powerful Roman invaders?

Well that was thanks to the magic
potion brewed up by the Druid Getafix...

which gave superhuman strength to
those who were lucky enough to get it.

Oh no Obelix! No! The potion has
had a permanent effect on you!

You know you fell into the
Cauldron when you were a baby.

...fell into the Cauldron when
you were a baby...nhanhanhay...

Oh some Romans!

Centurion, what is the point of having
another go, you know what those...

Gauls will do to us. That
lot is simply not human.

Maybe but those are Caesar's orders,
who knows perhaps it will be...

different this time. Watch there!

Form square!

Forward!

Join the army they said, it's
a real man's life they said.

It didn't turn out so very different
form usual did it Centurion?

No, no not very. -I know
rather a good joke...

post equitem sedet atra cura.

Right these Gauls will make
Latin a dead language...

if Julius Caesar would
insist on fighting them.

Those Gauls are simply not human
Centurion, they just are not human.

You're right, they not human,
ordinary mortals could not resist...

the might of the Roman army.
- I told you so.

Must be Gods, we haven't
a hope to beat the Gods!

I'm going to Rome to tell
Caesar, the Gods are against us!

They're Gods, you say? This crazy
Gaulish village are Gods, that's a laugh!

But Caesar you do have to admit
these Gaulish villages can keep...

your army at bay. In my opinion
it is time we come to adopt a...

realistic approach to the situation.
Gods are against us, we're done for.

While seeking to follow a constructive
line, I hope none the less to be quite...

objective and I have therefore
come to the following conclusion...

it is no good trying to fight Gods.

Let us suppose to look on the bright
side, we've only got to deal with...

demi gods. Well even so, it is still
an extremely unpleasant predicament.

To take an example that can be
anyone willing to take on Hercules?

Hercules? Gods or Demigods! I
Caesar will show you cowardly...

old counsellors that half-wits are
only mortal, very mortal. Bruto!

Stop playing about that knife,
you'll end up hurting somebody.

But how are you going to show us that those
Gauls aren't Gods after all, oh Caesar?

Well first I shall visit them myself
and I shall put them to certain tests...

which only the Gods could perform.

And if they really are
Gods then I should give in.

But if they are just men, ordinary human

being, they'll have to
face the anger of Caesar!

And by Jupiter I can tell you they'll
finish up inside the lions of the circus!

Get that chariot and let us got ready!

I think I heard a bell going darling,
will you go and see who is there?

Julius Caesar is outside
and wants to see you.

Julius Caesar, the
Julius Caesar? Himself.

Right, a towel for my feet, fetch
my shoes. Let everyone know Asterix!

Where are those shoe pairs gone to?

Yes I'm coming!

Leave them to me, leave them to me.
- Calm down, let the chief have a word.

Ave, village chief!
- Hail Caesar, what are you doing here?

I have come to make a suggestion.

Your defiance of me is
bad for my reputation!

In Rome they're starting to laugh at me.
They are saying a bunch of half wits...

can hold the Roman army at bay.
- Really, watch your language you...

But some people say you must be Gods.

Gods?
- Us Gods?

Yes Gods and if that is so
then I will admit defeat.

But if you are only men...

then you will have to give in
into my power and accept our laws.

And how are me and my friends supposed
to prove if we are really Gods?

I wonder if you have heard of Hercules?
- Hercules the grocer?

No, no, the God Hercules! He performed

12 difficult task with
goddessment meet it to olimpus

It's seen the god saw
that he must be one of them

These 12 tasks what were they?

He strangled the Nemean Lion, killed the
Lernian Hydra. Caught the Elymanthian...

boar alive. Hunted down the stag
Cerynean, shot the Stymphalian...

birds with his bow. Tamed the bull on
the Island of Crete, Killed Diomedes...

conquered the Amazons, cleaned the
Augean stables in a day, killed Geryon...

stole the golden apples of the
Hesperides set Theseus free from Haydees.

And you want us to do all these daft
things to show weather or not we're God?

No not exactly that's all a bit out of
date now, I set up a new set of tasks.

Only Gods could hope to perform all
of them and if you succeed I blow...

myself fairly deep
but if you fail in even

one then you will have
to give in. It's a Deal?

You bet your life it's a deal.
- Yes yes!

Right, These tasks will take
you to Rome, Caius Pocus!

He will act as your guide along the
way and see that the tasks are fairly...

performed. He's the most
trustworthy man and very honest.

So, if you should succeed, Rome will
surrender, if you fail in a single task...

then you will all become slaves of Rome.

Okay we'll have it done.
- Ave!

You really think Caesar would surrender
and let you become masters of Rome?

Come to think of it perhaps
we got a bit carried away.

Oh, your magic potion
will help us out Druid.

Sure we'll have lots of fun by Tutatis!

Lots of fun!
- Asterix is the cleverest man among us.

Obelix is the strongest, so you two
are the only ones who can succeed.

May Tutatis hear you.

Here is a gourd full of magic
potion, mind you use it well.

You're going to need it!

Well then, are we on?
- We're off.

It's funny I wonder why Cacofonix hasn't
shown up to sing us a farewell song.

Hi, now for the first task,
follow me, will you please?

This is Aspestos just
back from Marathon, he

was champion runner
at the Olympic Games...

He can run faster than a horse,
faster than the stone wind that howls

through the trees.

One of you will have
to beat him in a race.

You'll do it Asterix!

You're faster than me, faster than a
horse wind howling through the trees.

All right. We'll be waiting for
you on the other side of the forest.

At the finishing line. Start when all
the sand has run out of the hour glass.

Well fancy that, you are a real Olympic
champion, that's very interesting.

We have athletics in the village too,
but obviously as we all get some...

of the magic potion it
is not very exciting.

Are you listening to me? Right I was
saying it's not very interesting because...

we all get there at once and we
have to draw lots with the winner.

You notice that I don't need to drink
any magic potion because I'm very fast.

I say, you are not very chatty are you?

Hey wait for me!

I think I'd better take a little
potion the village's future is at stake.

Hey there, not a bad start,
you really took me by surprise!

I got a held up back there in the forest
because I stopped to pick mushrooms.

You see? I like picking flowers too.

Look aren't they beautiful?

If you like apples I know a good place
over there where there is a good tree.

Funny, the race has
improved his profile.

That seems to be the first of your
tasks performed quite successfully.

So now for the next one.

Kermes the Persian, the most amazing
javelin thrower the world has ever seen.

His javelin has crossed oceans
and seas, this is your second task.

Throw javelin further than Kermes.

War! This means war!

Now this time Asterix, let me!

All right! But throw
it as far as you can.

Just you watch!

Second task performed,
and now for the next one.

You are going to play
Silindric the German.

No wrestler or gladiator
has ever beaten him.

Silindric the German'll come in
that way, you must wait for him here.

Look at the size of those gates,
he must be big Silindric the German.

Yes I like them big and strong.

That's him! Silindric the German?
- Why he isn't big at all!

I like them big, hey suppose
we give him some magic potion?

Good day, which of you two gentleman is
first or both of you at once maybe ja?

I'll go first and finish him off at
once and then we go on to the next task.

All right but watch out, there must be
a catch; he's got some funny clothes on.

No the robes don't make the druid!

Oh the fat gentleman first. ja
- I am not fat!

Yeah very well the fat one first.
- Listen you!

I say what a splendid way to fight;
I've never seen anything like it.

Ah ja I have learned it on my
travels, long long travels far away.

You would like to have a go ja?
- Ja, yes sorry.

It's easy you have only to use the
man's own strength to get them down.

The stronger he is the better for you.

Easy, easy you just say
that because you're strong.

Nein, nein, word of honour,
try yourself, here take my hand.

Put your foot right on the stomach,
then raise backward, bend down.

Ja ja, harder harder!

Like this?
- Ja ja, you get the idea, ja ja.

Ja well done! Harder!

That's it!
- Was it really good?

Very good but a little bit
soft ja. Lets do the next thing.

When you have got me on the ground, you
take the advantage that I'm a little...

dizzy and you jump on me, ja.

Like that?
- Gut! You take hold of my arm like this.

And then you pull, you tie a
knot, gut! And then the other arm.

Excellent! And what will
you think of next? The legs!

Right leg, wunderbar,
left leg. Fantastic!

And now you can see I can't move at
all, why you have beaten me, mein her!

They have got through the first two tasks
all right, not bad but it proves nothing.

Rome is not Gaulish yet.

They've not had much to prove so
far, now however the next task!

They will have to face the
princesses of the Isle of Pleasure.

I never knew there was a lake here.

Well there is and you have to get
across it that's your next task.

I shall go and wait on the other side.
Of course it's inconceivable you...

should succeed, there is a
boat over there, bon voyage.

I call this test a piece of cake.
We'll reach the other side in no time.

We'd better be careful
though, you never can tell.

The lake is calm and the
boat doesn't seem to leak.

Oh they sing better than Cacofonix.

Welcome to the isle of pleasure,
we were expecting you, this way.

Nice little place you've
got but who are you?

Never mind who we are, bold one
give yourself up to pleasure.

This way we're going to
show you all over our island.

And now you've seen our island, the
island you will never leave again.

Your lightest wish will be
our command. forever and ever.

What would you like oh warrior?

Some food.
- Some food?

Why not, I'm starved, dancing
out in the open makes me hungry.

You're here on the isle of pleasure and
the chief priestess herself has asked...

what you would like
and you ask for food?

Of course eating is a great pleasure.

This is the island pleasure isn't it?

All right we can provide
nectar and Ambrosia.

Nectar, no fear, no fear, no
none of that boring old stuff!

I want a nice wild boar,
wild boar is very tasty.

You call nectar and Ambrosia boring?
Why that is food for the Gods themselves.

Well...Are you Gods or aren't you?

Well I suppose we may be
Gods but we eat wild boar.

But there aren't any
wild boar on this island.

What! There aren't any boar

And you expect me to stay with you
for good? You must be off your head!

Get lost fatty, do you really think I
would lower myself to do your cooking?

And the washing up too.
- And housework!

And clean you shoes!
- Push off, get out!

You bet your life I'll get out, they
have no wild boar and they dare to call...

this the isle of pleasure! Come on
Asterix, there's nothing here for us.

Never mind him, we'll give you
pleasure such as the Gods enjoy...

on Olympus oh warrior.

Asterix!

The next task will take
place in that temple.

What do we have to do in there?
- You will be required to look deep...

into the dreaded eyes of the
Iris, the great Egyptian magician.

By Osiris and by Apis, look
at me, look into my eye!

You have turned into a cat! By
Osiris and Apis, a cat. That's right!

By Osiris and by Apis there's a dear
pussy cat, off you go little pussy cat.

Next please.

By Osiris and by Apis, look into my
eyes, you have turned into a bird.

Yes a bird by Osiris
and by Apis, a bird!

You saw that?
- Yes he was flying low, we'll have rain.

Next!

What is all this about? Yes I remember
now, and which one of you is to...

undergo my pleasure treatment? Sorry to
rush you, my appointment book is very full.

I'll have a go.
- All right, seat yourself just there.

Ready then? I'll begin.

By Osiris and by Apis look at me! Look!

How do you do all that with your eyes?

Silence, concentrate please! By Osiris
and by Apis look at me, look in my eyes!

By Osiris and by Apis you
have turned into a... in what?

A wild boar! You Gauls
are very fond of wild boar.

Lets start again. By Osiris
and by Apis look in my eyes!

You have turned into a wild boar!
- Can you light one of them up at a time?

I'm Concentrating!

Where was I? A wild boar.

You are wild boar! A wild
boar. do you hear? A wild boar.

Must be very useful for reading in bed.

Silence. I have to start again.

You are a wild boar, by Apirsi and
by Osaris a boar, by the Usaris.

By Opis oh mama! You repeat
after me: I am a wild boar,

I am a wild boar.

You are a wild boar; you are a wild boar.
- That's right. I am a wild boar.

I am a wild boar. A wild boar!

Iris made me hungry
going on about wild boar.

What's more it's lunchtime.

Well that's lucky because your next
task will be to eat every morsel...

of a meal prepared for
you by Mannechenpix.

The great chef of the Titans.

No mortal man has ever got
through one of his enormous meals!

But you will have to eat it all
down to the last crumb. Bon apetit.

An interesting kind of task at
last, it's my turn now, right?

No doubt about that.

You are expected monsieur, sit down
and I'll be bringing the banquet!

What's this?
- Ah this I have invented myself!

These are ruts that grow in the
ground, I hope you'll like them.

The Geese! This is good
because they are fat!

The nice mutton platter!
Made for the hungry wolf!

The titanic omelette! Eight dozen eggs!

The whole school of fish, that
teaches you what is like to eat well!

The ox, look at him he
will melt in your mouth!

This cow might not be as tasty
but is much more delicate!

The veal, because to separate the
family that would not be right.

A whole thing of caviar,
large kind and there is more.

Here is a piece of toast to go with it.

The camel, this you will like,
and it has a good stuffing too.

And before we start on the next
course The elephant with olives!

Did he eat everything?
- Yes he ate everything!

I have nothing left in my kitchen!
Oh God, I will have to shut my shop!

Did anyone see which way the chef went?
He walked out, I just had the starters!

What on earth is all this?

What's up with you my fellow
dressing in that awfully silly way?

It's not silly! I've got to get
ready to be ruler or Rome, haven't I?

Ruler of Rome, well honestly.

When my lads have won all their
tasks we'll be setting off for Rome.

For Rome? Do you really think
Rome will ever be Gaulish?

I think you are counting your wild
boar piglets before they are hatched.

You think so?
- Yes, why don't you all go home?!

That's right, run along, leave us alone!

You don't think they will win?
- Caesar is mighty, he has made a pact...

with the powers of darkness and
only the Gods know what dreadful...

dangers Asterix and Obelix
may still have to face.

And now you must go inside
the cave of the beast.

The cave of the beast? And
what is this beast like?

I have no idea, no one
has ever come out alive.

Well nice to have known you.

Coming Obelix? - Why not?
The place looks quite interesting.

How many then?
- EH? Two.

Watch out there, get down!

Hey Asterix...
- Yes I know we shall have rain

with the birds fly low.
- Not really!

We can kept nice and
dry inside this cave.

Fifteen all.

Excuse me please sir, are
we right for the beast?

Look you might at least
answer when I ask a question.

Beastly aren't they?

If they think they can frighten us,
they are wrong, because everyone knows...

that we fear only one thing frighten us
and that is the sky falling on our heads.

Shhhh! Watch out.

What might that be?
- I have no idea, but I am really...

getting rather fed up, we seem to
have been in this cave quite some time.

Come to think of it what is the time?
- It's about twelve noon.

Are you hungry again already?
- Why shouldn't I be hungry?

I'm always hungry at twelve
noon, I could eat anything at all!

You hear me? Absolutely anything

Shut up! Listen!

The Beast!

I hope you will forgive my curiosity,
but the beast, what was it like actually?

Very tasty, waiter I'd like a drink.

We've only got lemonade.

Those people seem very odd by Tutatis!

They've all been to the
place that sends you mad.

The place that sends you mad?

Yes and you'll have to go in there
as well, that's your next task.

What do we have to do in this place?
- Oh nothing much!

You have to obtain a certain permit
which will allow you to the next task.

I see nothing but a simple
administrative formality.

Right, a formality, a simple formality
you have to ask for permit number 838.

All right. Obelix!

What is it?
- We want a copy of permit number 838.

If you want to register a galley, you
have to ask at the harbour masters office.

We don't want to register a galley,
we want a copy of permit number 838.

At the port, it's down at the other
side of town, it's down by the seaside.

We don't want to go to the port,
we want a copy of permit number 838.

Eh?
- Permit number 838!

There's no need to shout, where
do you think you are, by Jupiter!

Apply at window number one, left hand
corridor, last door on the right, got it?

Last door on the right?
- Last door on the right?

There is no door on the right!
- Oh he must have got it wrong.

Lets try the door opposite.

And who gave you permission
to come into my office?

We're looking for window number one.
- Consult the map on the 6'th floor.

Close the door. Impertinent!
Now where were we Miss?

These stairs are pretty steep.

Carry on.

This one?
- No this is the 4'th we want the 6'th.

Ah this is the plan.
- Can't make it out at all.

Window number one is on the ground
floor, last corridor on the right.

What is your business?
- We want a copy of permit number 838.

You have been misdirected, you
have to apply at window number 2.

Next door to this one?
- No that one is window 8.

You'd better ask at the front desk.

Where is window number 2?
- I've already told where the port is!

I don't want the port, I've told you!
- Now gentlemen calm down.

Someone is trying to work, and
what is the problem may I ask?

I have no idea Mr. Prefect, they
keep jabbering a lot of nonsense.

We are looking for window 2.

Window 2, where exactly
did they put that one?

Last time anyone saw it, it was on the
3'ed floor, corridor B door 6. Mr Prefect!

There you are gentleman, there was
nothing to be getting so worked up about.

We seem to be getting somewhere now.
- Mmmm, I'm not all that confident.

She bought some material from a
Phoenician trader for her cubiculum.

But how strange, how odd!
- She's the kind whose always got to...

show off, she can't even afford a slave!
- Miss...

She says she preferred to
do her house work herself!

I know her husband's financial situation.
- Excuse me...

Oh can't you see I'm busy, where was I?
- The financial situation.

Oh poor Claudius, you know he worked up
a nice little business building viaducts.

Excuse me Miss!
- Would you mind?

Permit number 838!
- Have you filled in a blue form?

A blue form? No! -How do
you think to get permit 838?

Where can I get hold of a blue form?
- Window one.

I've been there!
- That's right, that viaduct at the...

first gust of wind crashed.
- Did it collapse?

Nothing left but some ruins. Still
they look picturesque in the country.

She's at lunch but you could
apply at window 35, ask downstairs.

Can't you get it right?

Fill in this form then you'll
be able to get the pink form.

What pink form?
- The one you need in order to get...

permit 838, window 12, second
floor staircase B, corridor J.

You need the yellow form, window 7
on 5'th floor, staircase K corridor W.

Get the green window 14 on the
first floor, staircase F, corridor T.

Get the blue form, window 36,
6th floor, staircase B corridor F.

Get the yellow form, window
corridor staircase five...

Stop it!

Calm down Obelix, Clam down!

We will never get out of here Asterix,
the magic potion won't be any help to us.

We will go mad and we'll
be Julius Caesar's slaves.

Not if I know it, it's true the magic
potion won't help us but I know what.

I can fight them with their
own weapons, you watch this.

Is this where I get permit 839?

Don't you mean permit 838? For 838 you
- No no what I need is permit 839.

In the new circular B65? Wait
here. Ever heard of circular B65?

Circular B65?
- The one about permit 839

Not me, we shall have to find out
from the head of filing systems of...

material not get coordinated.
- It's on the 5'th floor, staircase Z.

The office has moved to the second floor
staircase H corridor N, shall we go?

Yes come on.

Circular B65, about permit 839? No.

The messenger of new circular or
provisional material must have...

forgotten to let us know. They are on
ground floor, staircase 2 corridor U.

What a new circular? Go to supervisor
of planning and new material.

Where is he? Lets go
and ask down at the desk.

Calm down, quiet, quiet!
- Please sir...

I'm very busy just
now, what are you after?

Permit number 838!

All right, and kindly leave some
people here are trying to work.!

Ave Caesar, morituri te salutant.

Yes Caesar, they have performed
them all, even that last task.

Hercules himself would have failed that.

Well, I must admit they are remarkable
but they haven't yet got to Rome.

I have 7 special treats in stall for them,
there is no need to worry, By Mercury!

We shan't be seeing a little Gaulish
village becoming the capital...

of the Roman world! We can
proceed with the rehearsal now.

Well oh Caesar I guess the
rehearsal is just about over.

Let's see what's next on the list,
You'll have to cross this canyon.

Walk across that invisible
thread that you do not see there.

Walk along an invisible thread?

Why don't we cross down below it's just
a small river and the water looks calm.

Yes but in fact that little
river is full of crocodiles.

Lots of sacred crocodiles, they
were a present given to Caesar...

by the Egyptian head of
state, Queen Cleopatra.

They are very savage
creatures and very voracious.

Yes I don't like crocodiles, I
tried them once, They were stringy.

Come on Asterix!

Oh all right, I suppose we
should have to. Are you coming?

You start, I'll follow

Here we go!

Your next tasks is to make
the ascent of this mountain.

A the top you must look for
the old man of the mountains.

And what do we have to do with
this old man of the mountains?

The old man of the mountains
will ask a difficult riddle.

You will have to answer it correctly
if you get it wrong the results...

will be quite fatal, I mean as
far as you are concerned of course.

Why can't this old man come
down here to ask his riddle?

Come on don't be a
lazy bones! Here we go!

There must be a marvellous
view from up here.

Here I've run out of mountain side.

That's because you've got to the
top, the old man can't be far away.

Would you be the old man
of the mountain, old man?

I am the old man of the mountain,
have you miserable mortals...

come to ask for the riddle?

Well I'm glad we haven't been
climbing the wrong mountain.

Come on ask your riddle old man of the
mountains, it's not very warm up here.

One moment, do you know foolish
men that if you fail to give me...

the right answer, you will be banished
into the eternal depths of hell?

After climbing all this way, not
likely, I've got better things to do.

Come on, the riddle.

So be it oh mortals,
follow me. Ow my back!

You ought to take a trip to
the seaside, it'll do you good.

Oh you presumptuous mortals, one
of you, eyes blind folded by me...

but there is still time to go back.

Oh go on, ask your riddle.

One of you will have to tell me
which of these two piles of laundry...

has been washed with
Olympus, the Gods detergent.

This one, it's silkier, got that.

Yes, you've got it right! Sure enough
this pile is much softer, much gentler.

Much whiter, the gods do their washing
with Olympus which washes whiter...

and leaves your hands much softer.

Holy Gods did you hear that? This
mortal has given the right answer.

Holy Gods did you hear that.?

All right we can all hear you.
- Those Gauls lads are pretty good.

You must admit Olympus really does
wash whiter and leaves your hands soft.

Ok we get the idea!
- You military men.

Silence, by me!
- But listen oh Jupiter, do these Gauls...

who are doing so well,
get a place up here too?

We're rather short of space as it is.
- Quiet! We don't let all and sundry...

blight our path and to be honest
I'm getting fed up with them!

Rome's over there, not far away, but
before you're allowed inside you have...

Spend the night on this
plane? Ah good idea!

I feel a bit tired after
those tasks, I need a sleep.

Yes but I must warn you that all those
who have dared to spend the night...

here before you have died of fear. it
is called the plane of departed spirits.

Well good night! If that's
the right expression.

What do you suppose
happens on this plane?

I don't know and I don't care.

We must be fit and well tomorrow to
enter Rome to tackle our last task.

Lets go to sleep now.

There's no need to go further,
we'll be all right here.

Are you sure?
- Good night Obelix.

Good night Asterix.

Fall in!

Good some Romans! All
those Roman just for me!

Forward march!

Don't make so much noise,
you'll wake up Mr. Asterix.

Form a triangle!

A heart!

A diamond A spade!

A cubs

Away!

I'll chop off your head poor mortal,
we are departed spirits, were ghosts!

Trapped on this cursed battle field
where we were massacred because...

of the queen and her men and now at
this witching hour we take revenge...

by making all those who dare to
spend the night here die of fear.

What's going on around here?
What's all this row about?

Please Asterix don't be angry, they're
only trying to keep their spirits up

because they got parted by
some witches and mad men.

No you've gone and got it all wrong,
I'll explain it, we are departed spirits.

I couldn't care less who you are,
do you know what the times is?

Yes, no do please listen.
- No you can listen to me!

We've run a big race, we've been throwing
the javelin, we've been wrestling...

we've been how to face
the princesses, magicians,

Big beasts, crocodiles, we
need a good nights sleep!

You can keep your spirits up
but kindless don't keep us up.

I'm sorry you must excuse him.
- Obelix come here.

Oh do listen we're only ghosts!

Quiet!

Get up you are expected.

But where are we?

You're in Rome outside Julius Caesar's
palace, Caesar is expecting you.

There is something funny going on here.
The Romans have learnt to build very fast.

What does it matter? Come on then
soldier take us to your leader.

Well here you are in Rome at last.
- Yes here we are Julius.

Caius has told me all about you journey.

Yes oh Caesar, they have
managed to perform all talks.

overcome all problems
and succeeded every time.

The Gods have kept you alive,
this is where your luck runs out.

It is impossible for you
to become masters of Rome!

The last task will be the toughest!
Where you will be massacred.

Aa well as the other
Gauls from your village.

Here we are everyone.

Ah so this is Rome.
frankly I'm disappointed.

I think the time has come
to play you a little music.

Geriatrics!

Caesar, the Gauls request an audience.

It's the lads.

Here they are
- Look they've all come, Dogmatix.

Say you Gauls! Quiet!

Do you know where you are?
Silence! Silence I say! Silence!

You are all to be slaughtered
for the amusement of my people!

And then nothing at all, nothing will
cast a shadow on my triumph. Guards!

Well then, well then, which one is it?
That ones for the gladiators, that ones...

for the ones with nets, that ones for
Fulvia, I wonder what's she's doing...

in there, this one for the lions.
- I'll be happy to lend you a hand.

Caesar's just arrived!
- What a great big crowd!

Roll up everyone, it's ready!

It's the magic potion
and I can't have any.

Will the owner of the cart parked
in front of thermae, remove it?

Quickly cause is causing obstruction!

I hope everything is ready.
- Yes, Caesar, just to start, these...

unhappy Gauls will have to face the

fiercest of our Gladiators
and if there're...

any survivors, we will have to let out
the wild beasts, we have lions, tigers...

panthers and bears and elephants the
audience will love this programme!

All right, you can
bring out the gladiators.

Ave Caesar, morituri te salutant.

I think we should all get
ready, it will soon be our turn.

Good I'm going in first and you all
follow me and keep in line please.

We've got lots of people watching
us so lets show some dignity.

And why should you go first?
- I'm your chief, that's why!

But we've been doing all
the work haven't we Asterix?

So it's our turn to have some fun now.
- Some people get all the luck.

Who asked you?
- You stupid!

Who said stupid?
- Everyone stand back!

See my foot here?

We've been working hard and the stupid
- Stupid yourself fatty!

Oh Asterix he called me fatty!

You can let the Gauls out now.

Leave them to me! Leave them to me!
- No we won't! No we won't!

I'll smack your face!
- You Just try it!

I will!
- Go one, you just try!

Oh run away!

Let me have one! let me have one!

Oh hello!
- Hello!

I've won one!
- You won what?

Up here! Up here!

Pass him! Pass him to me!

Ow, I've injured myself!

Jolly good, jolly good, that's right!
- Oh yes? Take this!

Pass it on!

Aw who threw that pie at
me? Who threw that pie?

Come on! Who did it?

Wild beasts, bring on the wild beasts!

Oh they are making the children laugh!

They ruined the circus!

Stop that! Will you stop!

You Gauls, You performed all 12 tasks
I set you, you've succeeded in every...

one of the difficult tasks which I
made up for you so you must be Gods.

It's no good trying to fight against
Gods, You are our new masters!

I leave my fate and that of
Rome entirely in your hands.

With great magnanimity the Gauls
allowed Julius Caesar to retire to a...

little country villa to live there
in peace and quiet far from the...

responsibility of the past.

Julius your dinner is ready!

What a really wonderful
cook you are Cleopatra dear!

As for our friend Caius he was
allowed to choose his won reward...

for his good and faithful service.

And at last, back in Gaul, in the
little village which is now the centre...

of the known world, our friends reunited
celebrated their return with a...

banquet under the stars.

Have we really become
the masters of Rome?

Lets face it this is only a
cartoon film, and anything goes!

Anything goes!