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I had this memory game when I was a kid...
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a bunch of cards facedown in rows.
3
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Each card has a picture.
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You turn one over, look at it...
5
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then you turn it back over.
6
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Then you have to try and remember
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where its matching card was.
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I have to get on a plane.
I have to get on a plane.
9
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Dr. Grey, Dr. Grey, you were on a plane.
10
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You were in a plane crash.
Can you tell me what you...
11
00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:35,949
Derek!
12
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Meredith, get up!
13
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Sometimes you have no idea.
14
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Where-where's my sister?
15
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My sister... where is Lexie?
16
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No, no, no, no.
17
00:00:45,277 --> 00:00:47,297
Where-where-where's my husband
and-and-and Cristina?
18
00:00:47,298 --> 00:00:48,877
- Lay back and relax.
- I have to get...
19
00:00:48,878 --> 00:00:50,189
- All right.
- I have to get to my sister and my husband.
20
00:00:50,190 --> 00:00:51,121
All right. Hold on. Hold on.
21
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- I... my sister.
- Hey, you can't go in there.
22
00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:54,036
Don't tell me where I can go.
23
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There's an infection and
I need to see him. Move.
24
00:00:57,302 --> 00:00:59,699
And other times, it shows us
exactly what we need to see.
25
00:00:59,700 --> 00:01:01,468
Doctor, we've got them.
We're taking care of them.
26
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That's your mama.
27
00:01:06,121 --> 00:01:07,420
Hey, honey.
28
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Okay, okay.
29
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You sit here. Mama's here, baby.
30
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There we go.
31
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Mama's here. No.
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The cards seem completely
out of order and random,
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but you keep turning them over.
34
00:01:20,728 --> 00:01:22,237
And the more cards you see...
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you get a sense of how
everything fits together.
36
00:01:32,606 --> 00:01:33,615
Hey.
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00:01:38,131 --> 00:01:40,074
They're taking us home
tomorrow on a plane.
38
00:01:40,075 --> 00:01:42,326
And I said no planes,
but we don't have a choice,
39
00:01:42,647 --> 00:01:44,802
because of Mark and Arizona, so...
40
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so I told Bailey to just sedate us...
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sedate all of us.
42
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And we'll never know it happened.
43
00:01:59,128 --> 00:02:00,099
Right?
44
00:02:02,592 --> 00:02:03,537
Cristina?
45
00:02:06,849 --> 00:02:07,766
Cristina?
46
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I wish they had put me out, too.
47
00:02:24,788 --> 00:02:26,127
Yeah, I know what you mean.
48
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All I keep thinking is,
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we're gonna crash on some tropical island
50
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and get attacked by a polar bear.
51
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Now... I don't know what you mean.
52
00:02:37,888 --> 00:02:39,513
You should watch more TV.
53
00:02:41,624 --> 00:02:43,634
I don't even know how
you can think of leaving.
54
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Because it's Harvard.
55
00:02:44,515 --> 00:02:46,419
Meredith, because you don't
turn down an offer from Harvard.
56
00:02:46,420 --> 00:02:47,171
You have two,
57
00:02:47,172 --> 00:02:49,816
maybe three surgeries
left on your hand before...
58
00:02:49,817 --> 00:02:51,392
You know what?
Maybe they have doctors there.
59
00:02:51,393 --> 00:02:52,205
Maybe one can help me.
60
00:02:52,206 --> 00:02:54,163
With Mark in the condition he's in,
and Cristina?
61
00:02:54,164 --> 00:02:55,220
I'm not saying we leave tomorrow.
62
00:02:55,221 --> 00:02:56,504
They're just looking for a time frame.
63
00:02:56,505 --> 00:02:57,523
Well, I'm sorry, Derek.
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00:02:57,524 --> 00:03:00,446
I know you really want to go.
But I can't even think about it.
65
00:03:00,447 --> 00:03:01,704
This is not about me. This is about you.
66
00:03:01,705 --> 00:03:02,972
You're at the beginning of your career.
67
00:03:02,973 --> 00:03:03,951
It's you they want.
68
00:03:03,952 --> 00:03:05,645
I don't know. I'm not the
same man that they hired.
69
00:03:05,646 --> 00:03:07,571
- Don't say that.
- 80%, Meredith.
70
00:03:07,572 --> 00:03:08,836
Don't say that!
71
00:03:13,237 --> 00:03:14,947
We stay here, we work here,
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00:03:14,948 --> 00:03:17,873
we move into that beautiful
house that you built us.
73
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That was our plan.
74
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That was before you got a job in Boston.
75
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And that was before our plane crashed.
76
00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:25,193
Mm. Blowing off Harvard. Wow.
77
00:03:26,267 --> 00:03:28,236
You're blowing off Hopkins. Wow.
78
00:03:28,237 --> 00:03:31,420
No, I'm postponing Hopkins
till Robbins is better.
79
00:03:31,492 --> 00:03:33,014
Avery did the same thing for Sloan.
80
00:03:33,015 --> 00:03:33,972
And I stayed.
81
00:03:33,973 --> 00:03:36,081
And you stayed because
you have no place else to go.
82
00:03:38,170 --> 00:03:40,052
Oh. Wake me up in ten for Chunky Stu.
83
00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:40,957
You just ate.
84
00:03:40,958 --> 00:03:43,148
Stuart. Short-bowel syndrome kid.
85
00:03:43,149 --> 00:03:44,732
I'm doing an intestinal transplant.
86
00:03:44,733 --> 00:03:46,137
He puked on me the first time we met,
87
00:03:46,138 --> 00:03:47,800
so I call him "Chunky Stu."
88
00:03:48,450 --> 00:03:51,606
Arizona hated it,
but Stuart thinks it's hilarious.
89
00:03:51,607 --> 00:03:54,292
How is Arizona's infection?
Is it getting any better?
90
00:03:54,411 --> 00:03:55,728
Don't know. I haven't seen her.
91
00:03:56,460 --> 00:03:58,186
What do you mean?
You're running her service.
92
00:03:58,970 --> 00:04:00,750
You really think she wants to talk to me?
93
00:04:00,858 --> 00:04:02,344
I mean, what am I supposed to say to her...
94
00:04:02,345 --> 00:04:04,274
"Hey, remember the time that I quit"
95
00:04:04,306 --> 00:04:06,641
"and you got pissed and took
my seat on a plane that crashed,"
96
00:04:06,642 --> 00:04:09,571
"and now you're trading in
your wheelie sneaks for a peg leg?"
97
00:04:09,910 --> 00:04:11,148
"Sorry. My bad"?
98
00:04:13,212 --> 00:04:14,268
How are we doing here?
99
00:04:14,269 --> 00:04:16,255
Hey, Jackson, you're
talking to Sloan, right?
100
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:17,243
Keeping him updated.
101
00:04:17,244 --> 00:04:19,188
Yeah. Not about work stuff, though.
102
00:04:19,189 --> 00:04:20,676
He doesn't need that kind
of pressure right now.
103
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:21,987
What is wrong with you two?
104
00:04:21,988 --> 00:04:22,984
I just said that...
105
00:04:22,985 --> 00:04:25,783
No, I'm just saying, they're fine.
They're gonna be fine.
106
00:04:25,784 --> 00:04:27,057
Arizona's not gonna lose her leg,
107
00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:28,404
and Sloan is coming back.
108
00:04:28,405 --> 00:04:29,376
They're coming back.
109
00:04:29,377 --> 00:04:30,600
So let's act like it.
110
00:04:32,846 --> 00:04:34,080
They're gonna be fine.
111
00:04:34,917 --> 00:04:38,204
We're all going to be fine.
112
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:46,014
How long are we saying that this is okay?
113
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As long as she needs.
114
00:04:49,108 --> 00:04:50,914
I, for one, find it refreshing.
115
00:04:53,433 --> 00:04:55,290
They say, if you don't have
something nice to say...
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She never has anything nice to say.
117
00:04:59,940 --> 00:05:02,693
Come on, Yang. I'm wide open. Just hit me.
118
00:05:10,429 --> 00:05:12,315
I said no more damn restraints!
119
00:05:12,316 --> 00:05:13,686
Look, she is clearly a danger.
120
00:05:13,687 --> 00:05:15,263
She doesn't even belong on this floor.
121
00:05:15,264 --> 00:05:16,968
She is violent, uncommunicative,
and I'm worried...
122
00:05:16,969 --> 00:05:19,271
Oh, she communicated.
She just hasn't talked yet.
123
00:05:19,272 --> 00:05:21,858
Look, there is nothing
physically wrong with her.
124
00:05:21,859 --> 00:05:23,072
She belongs up in psych.
125
00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:24,618
I am the chief of surgery and her husband.
126
00:05:24,619 --> 00:05:25,926
Don't tell me where she belongs.
127
00:05:25,927 --> 00:05:28,173
Well, with all due respect,
sir, that is exactly why
128
00:05:28,174 --> 00:05:29,791
you shouldn't be making this decision.
129
00:05:31,177 --> 00:05:32,012
Okay.
130
00:05:32,492 --> 00:05:33,956
Okay. It's time.
131
00:05:34,416 --> 00:05:35,615
It's time to get up.
132
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:37,704
They are gonna take you upstairs
133
00:05:37,705 --> 00:05:40,052
and they're gonna pump you
full of antipsychotics.
134
00:05:40,071 --> 00:05:42,623
And you're gonna go
slack-jawed and cuckoo's nest
135
00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:44,407
and you'll never be you again.
136
00:05:44,436 --> 00:05:47,261
Cristina, please,
I am begging you. Please.
137
00:05:47,296 --> 00:05:48,975
You have to say something.
138
00:05:50,980 --> 00:05:52,419
Cristina, please.
139
00:05:53,289 --> 00:05:54,437
Do you hear me?
140
00:05:54,973 --> 00:05:56,930
Say something, please.
141
00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:39,671
I'm a surgeon.
142
00:06:40,332 --> 00:06:42,549
What was that? Did you get that?
143
00:06:43,086 --> 00:06:44,109
No. It's all right.
144
00:06:44,152 --> 00:06:45,528
We're gonna take good care of you.
145
00:06:46,946 --> 00:06:48,788
There was damage to the second metacarpal,
146
00:06:48,789 --> 00:06:50,816
but the first M.C.P.
joint was completely crushed,
147
00:06:50,817 --> 00:06:52,705
so Boise did an X-fix.
148
00:06:52,706 --> 00:06:54,695
I revised it to an internal fixator.
149
00:06:54,696 --> 00:06:56,482
And then I removed a lot of scar tissue
150
00:06:56,483 --> 00:06:57,888
so there wouldn't be contractures.
151
00:06:57,889 --> 00:06:58,823
Uh... mm-hmm. Smart.
152
00:06:59,162 --> 00:07:00,556
Oh, thank you. Thanks.
153
00:07:00,557 --> 00:07:01,897
Did you see how I, uh...
154
00:07:01,898 --> 00:07:03,671
No, no, your work is-is great.
155
00:07:03,672 --> 00:07:06,662
Um, Derek, it's the, um, nerve damage
156
00:07:06,663 --> 00:07:08,402
that I'll concern myself with.
157
00:07:08,505 --> 00:07:10,490
And it looks like a pretty easy fix.
158
00:07:10,581 --> 00:07:12,966
You know, that'll get you
your prehensile strength back.
159
00:07:12,967 --> 00:07:14,098
That'll get you this back.
160
00:07:14,099 --> 00:07:15,793
Which will get me back into the O.R.
161
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,981
That's... the hope.
162
00:07:18,336 --> 00:07:19,582
Well, that's the point.
163
00:07:19,839 --> 00:07:20,774
I-isn't it?
164
00:07:21,206 --> 00:07:22,114
Of course.
165
00:07:22,363 --> 00:07:24,596
But your hand was badly damaged.
166
00:07:24,684 --> 00:07:26,361
And I think conservatively,
167
00:07:26,362 --> 00:07:28,585
I can get you back to 80% function.
168
00:07:36,699 --> 00:07:38,130
Meredith, I can teach,
169
00:07:38,451 --> 00:07:39,438
consult.
170
00:07:40,382 --> 00:07:42,416
I just may never do another surgery.
171
00:07:42,518 --> 00:07:43,999
Oh, don't talk like that.
172
00:07:48,592 --> 00:07:49,522
Meredith...
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00:07:50,933 --> 00:07:51,953
I'm alive.
174
00:07:53,281 --> 00:07:54,332
We survived.
175
00:07:56,032 --> 00:07:57,709
Zola has both her parents.
176
00:08:00,717 --> 00:08:01,591
I know.
177
00:08:02,758 --> 00:08:03,728
That's enough.
178
00:08:06,649 --> 00:08:09,718
Meningioma. Patient is female,
44 years old.
179
00:08:09,719 --> 00:08:10,818
It's a tricky spot.
180
00:08:10,902 --> 00:08:12,690
It's right up against the sagittal sinus.
181
00:08:12,691 --> 00:08:15,646
Which is why I suggested
Dr. Ramsey see what you might do.
182
00:08:17,059 --> 00:08:18,869
No radiosurgery. I'd cut it out.
183
00:08:18,870 --> 00:08:21,071
Right, but with two
draining veins in the way,
184
00:08:21,072 --> 00:08:23,007
it might be safer to see
how she responds...
185
00:08:23,008 --> 00:08:24,956
This woman's gonna live
for another 40 years.
186
00:08:24,957 --> 00:08:26,961
The tumor can recur too easily.
187
00:08:27,273 --> 00:08:29,705
You need to dissect
the two draining veins clear
188
00:08:29,981 --> 00:08:31,760
and approach it from this direction.
189
00:08:31,946 --> 00:08:33,278
You get it all, she's cured.
190
00:08:33,449 --> 00:08:34,976
Well, that's much sexier, isn't it?
191
00:08:34,977 --> 00:08:36,328
That's why we keep him around.
192
00:08:36,329 --> 00:08:38,609
Thanks, Shepherd. I'd be
happy to have you join me...
193
00:08:41,675 --> 00:08:43,133
or if you'd like to observe.
194
00:08:44,089 --> 00:08:46,867
I, um... probably have a class to teach.
195
00:08:46,868 --> 00:08:47,764
Good luck.
196
00:08:50,390 --> 00:08:51,326
She's right.
197
00:08:51,423 --> 00:08:52,505
You're invaluable.
198
00:08:56,289 --> 00:08:56,939
Great.
199
00:08:56,940 --> 00:08:59,384
Oh, hey, Dr. Shepherd.
This is pretty cool.
200
00:08:59,636 --> 00:09:02,693
Dr. Ramsey's got a meningioma
invading the sagittal sinus.
201
00:09:02,772 --> 00:09:04,080
She was gonna do it radiosurgically
202
00:09:04,081 --> 00:09:05,466
but decided to go after the whole thing.
203
00:09:05,467 --> 00:09:06,460
Oh, is that so?
204
00:09:06,607 --> 00:09:08,170
Yeah. She just freed
the first draining vein.
205
00:09:08,171 --> 00:09:10,286
Yeah, I got it, Ross. Thanks.
206
00:09:10,518 --> 00:09:11,990
There's bleeding on the sinus.
207
00:09:11,991 --> 00:09:12,972
Suction.
208
00:09:13,561 --> 00:09:14,567
Cottonoids.
209
00:09:15,780 --> 00:09:17,750
Okay, let's put the head of the table up.
210
00:09:17,751 --> 00:09:19,693
No, no, no, no. Get the head down.
211
00:09:19,694 --> 00:09:21,200
B.P. is 90 over 50.
212
00:09:21,201 --> 00:09:22,542
C.O.2 is down to 22.
213
00:09:22,543 --> 00:09:24,207
All right, get the head down.
Move it down.
214
00:09:24,208 --> 00:09:25,814
She's sucking in air.
You have an air embolus.
215
00:09:25,814 --> 00:09:26,868
Boki, bulb irrigate the field.
216
00:09:26,869 --> 00:09:28,884
Make sure no more air gets
in there. Seal it off.
217
00:09:29,379 --> 00:09:30,833
Thank you, Dr. Shepherd. That was, uh...
218
00:09:30,834 --> 00:09:33,119
All right, you have a hole in
the sinus you need to take care of.
219
00:09:33,245 --> 00:09:33,890
Yes, yes.
220
00:09:33,891 --> 00:09:36,319
You have to carefully reapproximate
the edges of the patch graft.
221
00:09:36,320 --> 00:09:37,469
I'll just seal it with a clip.
222
00:09:37,470 --> 00:09:38,829
No, don't. That could occlude the sinus.
223
00:09:38,830 --> 00:09:41,723
There. See? Bleeding stopped.
224
00:09:42,444 --> 00:09:44,091
Oh, B.P.'s 210 over 130.
225
00:09:44,092 --> 00:09:46,267
Venous infarction.
Ventriculostomy tube now.
226
00:09:46,319 --> 00:09:47,248
She's coding.
227
00:09:48,222 --> 00:09:49,080
It's not your fault.
228
00:09:49,081 --> 00:09:51,093
You didn't force her to try your approach.
229
00:09:51,094 --> 00:09:52,606
If she couldn't pull it off, well, then...
230
00:09:52,607 --> 00:09:54,108
I could've pulled it off
had I been in there.
231
00:09:54,109 --> 00:09:55,187
Well, you'll be back in there.
232
00:09:55,188 --> 00:09:55,861
No, I won't.
233
00:09:55,862 --> 00:09:58,693
I will be the former neurosurgeon
Derek Shepherd, research librarian.
234
00:09:58,694 --> 00:10:00,872
- Shut up.
- Mark, the guy gave me 80%.
235
00:10:00,873 --> 00:10:03,385
- Well, get back to 100%.
- It's not gonna happen.
236
00:10:03,431 --> 00:10:06,362
Don't give me that crap.
You love a hopeless case.
237
00:10:06,829 --> 00:10:08,887
It's true. It's the only
reason we're still friends.
238
00:10:09,627 --> 00:10:10,562
I'm glad you're doing better.
239
00:10:10,563 --> 00:10:11,448
Me, too.
240
00:10:11,761 --> 00:10:12,931
You will be, too.
241
00:10:13,384 --> 00:10:14,708
100%, you'll see.
242
00:10:16,827 --> 00:10:17,820
Yeah, coming along.
243
00:10:17,874 --> 00:10:19,318
X-ray shows excellent alignment.
244
00:10:19,319 --> 00:10:20,973
I hear Schachter moved your surgery up.
245
00:10:20,974 --> 00:10:22,186
Yeah, couple days.
246
00:10:22,187 --> 00:10:23,336
- Well, fingers crossed.
- Oh.
247
00:10:23,337 --> 00:10:24,685
Ohh, sorry.
248
00:10:24,764 --> 00:10:25,930
That was...
249
00:10:26,821 --> 00:10:28,675
No, it's okay. It's fine. I get it.
250
00:10:28,811 --> 00:10:31,395
So I had a look at, uh, Schachter's plan.
251
00:10:31,396 --> 00:10:33,235
He's opted for an end-to-end repair.
252
00:10:36,272 --> 00:10:37,154
What'd you think?
253
00:10:37,155 --> 00:10:38,061
It's good.
254
00:10:38,477 --> 00:10:39,577
Oh, it's great. He's amazing.
255
00:10:39,578 --> 00:10:40,481
He's the best, right?
256
00:10:40,482 --> 00:10:42,066
- But?
- But nothing.
257
00:10:43,242 --> 00:10:44,960
It's just that I've... I've been in there.
258
00:10:44,961 --> 00:10:46,148
I've seen the amount of gap in the nerve,
259
00:10:46,149 --> 00:10:47,225
and I know it's messier,
260
00:10:47,226 --> 00:10:49,067
but I thought a nerve
graft might be better.
261
00:10:49,756 --> 00:10:50,592
That's all.
262
00:10:50,770 --> 00:10:52,749
I'm sure he's-he's thought of it already.
263
00:10:52,750 --> 00:10:54,056
Uh, he's the best.
264
00:10:55,432 --> 00:10:56,190
Well, that would be...
265
00:10:56,191 --> 00:10:58,406
Be much riskier. You're right, it is.
266
00:11:00,370 --> 00:11:01,761
But it could mean a full recovery.
267
00:11:02,106 --> 00:11:03,472
You could use your own
A.I.N. for the graft.
268
00:11:03,473 --> 00:11:04,332
I've used it before.
269
00:11:04,333 --> 00:11:06,104
It's practically gift-wrapped
for a median nerve graft.
270
00:11:06,105 --> 00:11:07,210
Yeah, but if the graft doesn't take,
271
00:11:07,211 --> 00:11:08,460
we shorten the nerve more.
272
00:11:08,461 --> 00:11:10,402
I could lose more
function than I have now.
273
00:11:11,309 --> 00:11:12,495
You're right. It's stupid.
274
00:11:12,496 --> 00:11:13,707
That's why Schachter's not doing it.
275
00:11:13,708 --> 00:11:15,271
He's smart not to...
276
00:11:16,252 --> 00:11:17,336
Which is why you should.
277
00:11:17,790 --> 00:11:18,626
What?
278
00:11:19,907 --> 00:11:21,654
I want you to do the surgery.
279
00:11:21,655 --> 00:11:22,540
No.
280
00:11:23,948 --> 00:11:24,801
No.
281
00:11:38,881 --> 00:11:40,340
Okay, graft, please.
282
00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:46,172
Perfect.
283
00:11:46,431 --> 00:11:48,323
This looks...
284
00:11:49,700 --> 00:11:50,593
perfect.
285
00:11:53,371 --> 00:11:55,135
It's Arizona. There's a problem.
286
00:12:20,929 --> 00:12:22,716
- Watch that line.
- Hold her. Get some restraints.
287
00:12:22,717 --> 00:12:23,817
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Send... ow! Damn it!
288
00:12:23,818 --> 00:12:26,216
All right, I got it. I've got it.
289
00:12:26,217 --> 00:12:29,193
2 of lorazepam now! Now!
There's the restraints.
290
00:12:29,437 --> 00:12:30,696
Calm down. Easy.
291
00:12:30,764 --> 00:12:33,592
Calm down. Okay. Okay.
292
00:12:33,969 --> 00:12:37,612
The combination of extreme exhaustion,
dehydration, and exposure
293
00:12:37,613 --> 00:12:39,559
seems to have put her in a state.
294
00:12:39,811 --> 00:12:40,315
What do you mean?
295
00:12:40,316 --> 00:12:42,315
We think it's reactive psychosis.
296
00:12:42,316 --> 00:12:43,429
She's unresponsive,
297
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,261
and then when we go to examine her,
298
00:12:45,262 --> 00:12:46,743
she becomes... violent.
299
00:12:48,090 --> 00:12:48,841
I'm here, okay?
300
00:12:48,842 --> 00:12:50,006
I wouldn't do that.
301
00:12:50,525 --> 00:12:51,549
It's all right.
302
00:12:51,855 --> 00:12:52,687
Whoa.
303
00:12:53,043 --> 00:12:54,769
All right. All right. All right.
304
00:12:54,772 --> 00:12:56,501
Cristina. I'm gonna help you.
305
00:12:56,502 --> 00:12:59,022
Cristina, I am gonna help you.
I'm gonna help you.
306
00:12:59,148 --> 00:13:01,759
I'm here. Cristina, I'm here. I'm here.
307
00:13:01,927 --> 00:13:03,538
Cristina, I'm here now.
308
00:13:04,003 --> 00:13:05,814
It's okay. I'm gonna help you.
309
00:13:42,694 --> 00:13:44,334
So she doesn't speak at all?
310
00:13:44,704 --> 00:13:45,695
She hasn't yet.
311
00:13:46,043 --> 00:13:47,042
She just stares...
312
00:13:47,940 --> 00:13:48,868
and breathes.
313
00:13:51,016 --> 00:13:52,022
It's kind of weird,
314
00:13:52,077 --> 00:13:54,027
but the way that they talk
about her around here,
315
00:13:54,426 --> 00:13:56,087
it's like she's a legend, you know?
316
00:13:57,995 --> 00:14:00,308
Mm. And now she's like an end table.
317
00:14:01,694 --> 00:14:04,173
Shane, that's horrible. Stop it.
318
00:14:04,174 --> 00:14:04,969
Sorry.
319
00:14:14,712 --> 00:14:16,682
I'm gonna take a leave of absence.
320
00:14:18,517 --> 00:14:20,738
I think three years ago,
I said I was gonna figure out
321
00:14:20,739 --> 00:14:22,239
how to make a great roast chicken.
322
00:14:22,240 --> 00:14:23,395
Still haven't done it.
323
00:14:25,010 --> 00:14:28,608
I just like how a house smells
when there's a chicken in the oven.
324
00:14:36,634 --> 00:14:38,655
You're gonna feel stronger
in a couple of days
325
00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:39,869
or weeks.
326
00:14:41,465 --> 00:14:43,022
It takes as long as it takes.
327
00:14:44,223 --> 00:14:45,998
And we have all the time in the world.
328
00:14:47,448 --> 00:14:50,343
When you're back on your feet,
you'll go back to work
329
00:14:50,344 --> 00:14:52,056
at whatever pace you want.
330
00:14:53,283 --> 00:14:55,586
You'll go back into the O.R.,
and you can do your magic.
331
00:14:55,837 --> 00:14:59,260
You won't have to deal
with patients or families.
332
00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:02,362
I'll take care of all of that.
333
00:15:08,882 --> 00:15:10,172
You ready to get out now?
334
00:15:12,795 --> 00:15:13,750
I can't.
335
00:15:15,831 --> 00:15:16,656
What?
336
00:15:24,022 --> 00:15:25,302
I can't get out.
337
00:15:27,269 --> 00:15:28,115
Are you...
338
00:15:28,116 --> 00:15:29,747
You can. I'll... I'll help you.
339
00:15:33,919 --> 00:15:36,240
I stayed awake for four days.
340
00:15:39,919 --> 00:15:40,816
I remember...
341
00:15:42,744 --> 00:15:45,370
every single minute of those four days.
342
00:15:48,725 --> 00:15:50,044
The fire went out.
343
00:15:50,164 --> 00:15:53,313
It was really, really dark.
344
00:15:54,441 --> 00:15:56,572
There were so many stars.
345
00:15:59,072 --> 00:16:02,401
I remember getting
the bugs out of Arizona's leg.
346
00:16:04,098 --> 00:16:06,426
I put leaves on it,
trying to keep them out.
347
00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:10,720
And Mark...
348
00:16:12,961 --> 00:16:15,005
Mark just kept dying.
349
00:16:15,540 --> 00:16:17,276
It was so annoying.
350
00:16:17,634 --> 00:16:19,077
I kept trying to help him,
351
00:16:19,078 --> 00:16:21,951
but he just kept trying to die on me.
352
00:16:23,165 --> 00:16:25,005
I just wanted to lie down...
353
00:16:26,093 --> 00:16:28,529
and sleep on him because he was warm.
354
00:16:30,241 --> 00:16:31,921
And I wanted to sleep.
355
00:16:34,792 --> 00:16:36,598
Meredith was asleep.
356
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:39,862
Everyone was asleep.
357
00:16:41,622 --> 00:16:44,189
Arizona got the last of the water,
358
00:16:44,190 --> 00:16:47,658
and I remember drinking something bad.
359
00:16:48,864 --> 00:16:51,263
It might have been
the fuel from the plane?
360
00:16:52,916 --> 00:16:54,019
I drank...
361
00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:56,590
my pee.
362
00:17:00,085 --> 00:17:01,010
The noises...
363
00:17:04,379 --> 00:17:06,036
the animal noises...
364
00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:09,679
fighting and growling right...
365
00:17:10,161 --> 00:17:13,008
next to us, right there.
366
00:17:14,368 --> 00:17:16,897
I kept waiting for them
to come and kill me,
367
00:17:16,898 --> 00:17:17,945
but they didn't.
368
00:17:20,562 --> 00:17:21,878
And then I realized...
369
00:17:23,380 --> 00:17:25,246
they were fighting over Lexie.
370
00:17:31,127 --> 00:17:34,350
I tried to keep them off of her.
371
00:17:34,351 --> 00:17:35,359
I tried.
372
00:17:38,290 --> 00:17:39,588
But I couldn't get out.
373
00:17:41,076 --> 00:17:42,184
I can't get out.
374
00:17:44,989 --> 00:17:46,119
You're out now.
375
00:17:49,123 --> 00:17:50,081
I've got you.
376
00:17:51,095 --> 00:17:51,997
You hear me?
377
00:17:54,562 --> 00:17:55,948
I can't get out.
378
00:17:58,874 --> 00:17:59,935
Don't you see?
379
00:18:02,493 --> 00:18:04,048
I'll never get out.
380
00:18:12,376 --> 00:18:13,271
You okay?
381
00:18:13,764 --> 00:18:14,474
Yep.
382
00:18:14,475 --> 00:18:15,558
You sure you know what you're doing?
383
00:18:15,559 --> 00:18:18,946
Yes. It's one highway all
the way to Minnesota...
384
00:18:19,113 --> 00:18:21,387
through Montana, cross one of the Dakotas,
385
00:18:21,388 --> 00:18:22,262
I can't remember which.
386
00:18:22,263 --> 00:18:23,701
No, I meant by leaving.
387
00:18:23,811 --> 00:18:25,124
Are you sure you're okay with it?
388
00:18:25,125 --> 00:18:26,887
Are you sure it's the right thing to do?
389
00:18:26,888 --> 00:18:28,887
Meredith, not you, too.
Owen just tried to...
390
00:18:28,888 --> 00:18:31,232
Well, yeah, because I'm worried
that you're just running away.
391
00:18:31,233 --> 00:18:34,383
Well, yeah, I am. I'm fleeing,
like bambi from a forest fire,
392
00:18:34,384 --> 00:18:36,656
and so should you,
'cause horrible things happen here.
393
00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:38,106
No, something horrible happened,
394
00:18:38,107 --> 00:18:39,533
and we should stick together.
395
00:18:39,534 --> 00:18:41,012
You know what? We have stuck together.
396
00:18:41,013 --> 00:18:43,542
And we've grown together,
like two gnarled trees
397
00:18:43,543 --> 00:18:45,823
twining around each other,
trying to survive.
398
00:18:45,824 --> 00:18:47,961
Survive what? Cristina, this is life.
399
00:18:48,284 --> 00:18:50,070
Bad things happen. It's hard.
400
00:18:50,071 --> 00:18:51,055
You find your people,
401
00:18:51,056 --> 00:18:52,826
you find your person,
and you lean on them.
402
00:18:52,827 --> 00:18:54,096
Oh, god love you, Mer.
403
00:18:54,097 --> 00:18:56,405
You know, so many horrible
things have happened to you,
404
00:18:56,406 --> 00:18:57,794
and maybe you're okay with it,
405
00:18:57,795 --> 00:18:59,581
but you shouldn't be.
406
00:19:00,127 --> 00:19:01,193
Go to Harvard,
407
00:19:01,194 --> 00:19:02,766
anywhere except here,
408
00:19:02,791 --> 00:19:05,018
seeing your dead sister
around every corner.
409
00:19:05,153 --> 00:19:07,881
Hey, your mother died here.
Your husband was shot here.
410
00:19:07,882 --> 00:19:08,973
George died here.
411
00:19:08,974 --> 00:19:11,173
It's my life, and
you were here for it, too.
412
00:19:11,269 --> 00:19:13,326
I mean, now you sound like
the same scary loner bitch
413
00:19:13,327 --> 00:19:15,508
who rode in here on a
motorcycle five years ago.
414
00:19:15,509 --> 00:19:17,386
Like the past five years
has never happened?
415
00:19:17,387 --> 00:19:18,839
Well, you know,
a part of me wishes it hadn't.
416
00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:20,513
Oh, okay. Well,
then you should just go then.
417
00:19:20,514 --> 00:19:22,591
And you should not look back. Go.
418
00:19:22,685 --> 00:19:23,436
Meredith...
419
00:19:23,437 --> 00:19:25,703
No, you know, Cristina, you're right.
I'm not your person.
420
00:19:25,704 --> 00:19:26,969
And Owen isn't your person.
421
00:19:26,970 --> 00:19:29,671
Your person is you,
and it always has been.
422
00:19:50,186 --> 00:19:52,173
What the hell did they
do to this guy out there?
423
00:20:03,975 --> 00:20:05,857
Hold my hand.
424
00:20:09,870 --> 00:20:10,862
He's bradying down.
425
00:20:20,597 --> 00:20:21,519
Charge. Clear.
426
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:22,868
Yeah, I got a pulse.
427
00:20:23,064 --> 00:20:23,920
Clear.
428
00:20:24,919 --> 00:20:25,997
I flew to Boise.
429
00:20:25,998 --> 00:20:28,820
I-I was there,
but they wouldn't let me in.
430
00:20:28,821 --> 00:20:30,138
They said I wasn't family.
431
00:20:31,334 --> 00:20:32,314
It's not fair.
432
00:20:33,898 --> 00:20:35,055
You don't deserve...
433
00:20:39,430 --> 00:20:40,708
you deserve better.
434
00:20:41,046 --> 00:20:43,327
Shh. Stop it.
435
00:20:44,825 --> 00:20:45,727
I'm here.
436
00:20:47,152 --> 00:20:49,084
I'm not going anywhere, Mark.
437
00:20:51,023 --> 00:20:51,959
I love you.
438
00:20:58,981 --> 00:21:00,297
I love Lexie.
439
00:21:03,082 --> 00:21:04,361
Loved.
440
00:21:07,208 --> 00:21:08,698
I'm sorry.
441
00:21:20,379 --> 00:21:21,634
Callie.
442
00:21:22,032 --> 00:21:23,271
Callie.
443
00:21:24,380 --> 00:21:25,619
Go home.
444
00:21:26,910 --> 00:21:28,202
No, I'm all right.
445
00:21:28,435 --> 00:21:29,797
No, you're not.
446
00:21:30,165 --> 00:21:31,493
You've been up for the past two nights
447
00:21:31,493 --> 00:21:33,313
bouncing between Arizona's room and here.
448
00:21:33,313 --> 00:21:35,715
I just need some coffee. Can you, um...
449
00:21:35,725 --> 00:21:37,316
Can you stay with him while
I run to the cafeteria?
450
00:21:37,316 --> 00:21:38,733
I'll stay with him all night.
451
00:21:43,042 --> 00:21:45,305
I just feel like we're losing him, Derek.
452
00:21:46,053 --> 00:21:47,901
Usually when I talk to him,
I sense that he's there,
453
00:21:47,901 --> 00:21:50,636
that he's listening,
but I think he's giving up.
454
00:21:52,255 --> 00:21:53,116
I'm so scared,
455
00:21:53,116 --> 00:21:54,157
the second I leave this hospital,
456
00:21:54,157 --> 00:21:56,177
I'm gonna get a phone call that he's dead.
457
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:57,783
That's not gonna happen tonight.
458
00:22:00,383 --> 00:22:01,595
Promise?
459
00:22:02,929 --> 00:22:05,303
If he starts going south,
I'll tell him to cut it out.
460
00:22:06,015 --> 00:22:07,466
He idolizes me. Mm.
461
00:22:08,696 --> 00:22:10,078
He'll do whatever I say.
462
00:22:10,667 --> 00:22:11,903
Thank you.
463
00:22:23,868 --> 00:22:25,244
You heard what I told her.
464
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:29,332
Don't make me look like an ass.
465
00:22:30,709 --> 00:22:32,013
Pull it together.
466
00:22:32,745 --> 00:22:34,382
A lot of people counting on you.
467
00:22:36,812 --> 00:22:38,388
Damn it. I knew I
shouldn't have gone home.
468
00:22:38,388 --> 00:22:40,368
Is he okay? Did he code?
469
00:22:40,368 --> 00:22:41,623
Just come see.
470
00:22:41,623 --> 00:22:42,894
Oh, god. Where the hell is Shepherd?
471
00:22:42,894 --> 00:22:44,558
Avery, tell me what's going on.
472
00:22:45,078 --> 00:22:46,684
Torres.
473
00:22:46,750 --> 00:22:48,122
Where you been?
474
00:22:52,526 --> 00:22:53,603
Pretty amazing recovery, right?
475
00:22:53,603 --> 00:22:54,790
Yeah, his SATs are good?
476
00:22:54,790 --> 00:22:55,865
He's being weaned off pressors?
477
00:22:55,865 --> 00:22:57,178
Yeah, B.P. is 110 over 60.
478
00:22:57,178 --> 00:23:00,120
And he's making inappropriate
sexual comments to Brooks.
479
00:23:01,422 --> 00:23:02,203
It's fine.
480
00:23:02,203 --> 00:23:03,665
No, it's-it's not.
481
00:23:03,665 --> 00:23:06,367
But, uh, right now I'm really,
really enjoying it, so...
482
00:23:14,674 --> 00:23:15,747
You think it's the surge.
483
00:23:15,747 --> 00:23:17,504
Mm. It-it might be.
484
00:23:17,845 --> 00:23:19,351
I don't. I don't think it is.
485
00:23:19,351 --> 00:23:20,970
What's the surge?
486
00:23:21,048 --> 00:23:22,753
In many terminally ill patients,
487
00:23:22,753 --> 00:23:24,471
they have a final surge of energy.
488
00:23:24,471 --> 00:23:26,453
They get better before they get worse.
489
00:23:26,636 --> 00:23:28,317
But this is not that.
490
00:23:28,699 --> 00:23:32,114
But in a little while,
he'll do what all patients do.
491
00:23:32,292 --> 00:23:33,308
He'll have epiphanies,
492
00:23:33,308 --> 00:23:35,029
he'll tell you what
really matters in life,
493
00:23:35,029 --> 00:23:35,852
ask for his family.
494
00:23:35,852 --> 00:23:38,839
The man is telling dirty jokes.
It's not a... not a surge.
495
00:23:39,428 --> 00:23:41,533
No, I don't think so either.
496
00:23:43,128 --> 00:23:44,814
Uh, I have a facial lac.
497
00:23:44,814 --> 00:23:46,576
Uh, oh, I had a consult this morning...
498
00:23:46,576 --> 00:23:49,328
breast augmentation, "B" to "D."
499
00:23:49,672 --> 00:23:52,369
Did you tell her her breasts
were beautiful the way they are?
500
00:23:52,369 --> 00:23:53,969
No, I still think that's weird.
501
00:23:53,969 --> 00:23:56,000
Well, I know you do, but you're wrong.
502
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,062
You tell her she's beautiful
just the way she is,
503
00:23:58,062 --> 00:23:58,881
and if she believes you,
504
00:23:58,881 --> 00:24:00,194
you've saved someone
505
00:24:00,390 --> 00:24:02,158
an unnecessary surgical procedure.
506
00:24:02,158 --> 00:24:04,053
And that is definitely not
how I talk to patient.
507
00:24:04,053 --> 00:24:06,412
No, but it's how
you talk to a woman, Avery.
508
00:24:07,088 --> 00:24:07,749
We're in the business
509
00:24:07,749 --> 00:24:10,171
of making people feel
better about themselves.
510
00:24:10,171 --> 00:24:12,517
Again, sometimes when you talk,
511
00:24:12,517 --> 00:24:14,384
I feel like a male prostitute.
512
00:24:14,384 --> 00:24:17,114
She's a person on
the precipice of change, Avery.
513
00:24:17,114 --> 00:24:19,151
She's scared and she's worried.
514
00:24:19,775 --> 00:24:21,893
God, the things we worry about.
515
00:24:21,893 --> 00:24:23,326
So pointless.
516
00:24:23,953 --> 00:24:25,814
And we get to help take that worry away.
517
00:24:25,814 --> 00:24:27,047
It's why we're doctors.
518
00:24:27,047 --> 00:24:28,505
It's actually why we're people,
519
00:24:28,505 --> 00:24:31,595
but somehow we forget that
all that matters is people.
520
00:24:32,428 --> 00:24:35,814
And whether we walk away
leaving them better or worse
521
00:24:35,814 --> 00:24:37,212
for having met us.
522
00:24:37,770 --> 00:24:39,497
We control that, Avery.
523
00:24:40,995 --> 00:24:43,113
I want you to promise me something.
524
00:24:44,259 --> 00:24:45,823
If you love someone,
525
00:24:46,355 --> 00:24:47,658
you tell 'em.
526
00:24:48,641 --> 00:24:51,529
Even if you're scared that
it's not the right thing.
527
00:24:51,529 --> 00:24:54,057
Even if you're scared that
it'll cause problems.
528
00:24:54,057 --> 00:24:55,019
Even if you're scared
529
00:24:55,019 --> 00:24:58,136
that it will burn your life to the ground,
530
00:24:58,136 --> 00:25:00,628
you say it, and you say it loud.
531
00:25:01,551 --> 00:25:03,073
And then you go from there.
532
00:25:05,195 --> 00:25:07,702
Hey, where's my kid? I want to see Sofia.
533
00:25:07,752 --> 00:25:09,189
Avery, why don't you run up to day care
534
00:25:09,189 --> 00:25:10,197
and bring her down here?
535
00:25:10,197 --> 00:25:12,225
I can't bring a baby in the I.C.U.
536
00:25:12,225 --> 00:25:13,993
No, but you can sneak one in.
537
00:25:14,355 --> 00:25:16,215
Come on, Avery. Grow a pair.
538
00:25:16,450 --> 00:25:17,606
You know what? Forget it. I'll do it.
539
00:25:17,606 --> 00:25:19,156
Whoa, no, no, no. All right. I'll get her.
540
00:25:19,156 --> 00:25:20,661
- I'll get her.
- Yes!
541
00:25:20,922 --> 00:25:22,149
My man!
542
00:25:34,258 --> 00:25:35,879
Is this what I think it is?
543
00:25:36,473 --> 00:25:37,834
There's no way to know.
544
00:25:42,302 --> 00:25:44,958
We'll just... take it as it comes.
545
00:25:45,299 --> 00:25:46,545
Okay?
546
00:25:50,204 --> 00:25:52,169
Um, can we talk? I'm leaving.
547
00:25:52,169 --> 00:25:55,077
No. Actually, I've gotta
grab Sofia for Sloan.
548
00:25:55,077 --> 00:25:56,828
He needs to see her.
549
00:25:56,828 --> 00:25:57,881
But I can, uh, call you later.
550
00:25:57,881 --> 00:25:59,914
Uh, no, Jackson. I'm-I'm leaving...
551
00:26:00,453 --> 00:26:02,017
For home... Moline.
552
00:26:02,017 --> 00:26:03,646
My flight's in a few hours.
553
00:26:05,072 --> 00:26:08,459
- What do you...
- I... I don't have a job here anymore.
554
00:26:08,842 --> 00:26:10,625
My contract actually ended a few days ago,
555
00:26:10,625 --> 00:26:13,570
but I stuck around,
waiting for Sloan to get better,
556
00:26:13,570 --> 00:26:15,206
and he's better, so...
557
00:26:16,516 --> 00:26:18,342
Um, all right, I've gotta
get Sofia right now.
558
00:26:18,342 --> 00:26:20,010
Okay? But can you just wait?
559
00:26:20,077 --> 00:26:21,545
Just wait for me at Joe's.
560
00:26:21,545 --> 00:26:23,555
We can have a drink. We can talk.
561
00:26:23,604 --> 00:26:26,352
Just... okay? Just wait for me at Joe's.
562
00:26:26,361 --> 00:26:27,663
Okay.
563
00:26:27,763 --> 00:26:29,109
All right.
564
00:26:31,660 --> 00:26:32,728
Don't tell Callie.
565
00:26:32,728 --> 00:26:34,928
She's about to operate on Derek.
566
00:26:35,713 --> 00:26:36,953
Okay.
567
00:26:36,956 --> 00:26:39,278
Derek doesn't need to go
in this surgery worried,
568
00:26:39,278 --> 00:26:41,099
so don't say anything to him.
569
00:26:41,182 --> 00:26:43,096
They can reschedule the surgery, Mark.
570
00:26:43,096 --> 00:26:44,786
- I'm sure they'd want to.
- No.
571
00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:46,987
That surgery's gonna get Derek
572
00:26:46,987 --> 00:26:49,303
back into the O.R. where he belongs.
573
00:26:52,995 --> 00:26:54,789
Nobody's got better hands than him,
574
00:26:55,491 --> 00:26:57,125
except maybe Callie.
575
00:26:57,720 --> 00:27:00,414
Have you looked at her hands?
They're beautiful.
576
00:27:01,038 --> 00:27:02,992
Sofia has her hands.
577
00:27:05,505 --> 00:27:06,780
Callie...
578
00:27:07,583 --> 00:27:10,164
really doesn't even know how good she is.
579
00:27:11,299 --> 00:27:13,017
Sometimes you wish people...
580
00:27:14,325 --> 00:27:16,487
would just see themselves the way you do.
581
00:27:20,061 --> 00:27:21,399
Listen to me.
582
00:27:23,162 --> 00:27:24,548
This is surge talking?
583
00:27:24,548 --> 00:27:25,894
No, this is you.
584
00:27:26,908 --> 00:27:28,594
This is all you.
585
00:27:29,557 --> 00:27:30,853
So keep going...
586
00:27:31,451 --> 00:27:33,303
'cause I'm not going anywhere.
587
00:27:55,723 --> 00:27:57,241
The extensive bone injury
588
00:27:57,241 --> 00:27:59,215
along with the degree
of soft-tissue infection
589
00:27:59,215 --> 00:28:00,806
is... troubling.
590
00:28:01,384 --> 00:28:02,303
No matter what we do, it's...
591
00:28:02,303 --> 00:28:03,718
If the infection goes to the bone,
592
00:28:03,718 --> 00:28:05,218
it'll be hard to treat.
593
00:28:05,218 --> 00:28:07,452
And eventually,
you're looking at bone loss.
594
00:28:09,039 --> 00:28:10,384
I'm gonna have to say...
595
00:28:10,941 --> 00:28:13,165
officially, I'm recommending amputation.
596
00:28:16,529 --> 00:28:17,840
Show me those.
597
00:28:19,279 --> 00:28:21,313
Show them to me.
598
00:28:31,570 --> 00:28:33,295
I withhold consent.
599
00:28:33,411 --> 00:28:34,373
I withhold consent.
600
00:28:34,373 --> 00:28:36,095
Before you drug me or sedate me,
601
00:28:36,095 --> 00:28:39,506
I give n-nobody permission
to cut off my leg.
602
00:28:39,895 --> 00:28:44,344
And certainly not some
yahoo in dump truck, Idaho.
603
00:28:46,428 --> 00:28:48,125
I want to go home to Callie.
604
00:28:49,557 --> 00:28:51,029
She'll know what to do.
605
00:28:53,448 --> 00:28:54,980
Just take me home.
606
00:28:59,164 --> 00:29:01,168
- How's that?
- Mm. Yeah.
607
00:29:01,168 --> 00:29:02,380
Does that feel all right? Does that hurt?
608
00:29:03,308 --> 00:29:04,643
It doesn't hurt.
609
00:29:05,139 --> 00:29:07,557
And anything that doesn't hurt feels good.
610
00:29:07,577 --> 00:29:08,780
Thanks.
611
00:29:10,089 --> 00:29:11,522
Is the infection better or worse?
612
00:29:11,522 --> 00:29:12,962
Don't worry about that right now, okay?
613
00:29:12,962 --> 00:29:14,179
Just...
614
00:29:14,796 --> 00:29:16,052
try to feel good.
615
00:29:17,969 --> 00:29:19,180
Hey.
616
00:29:21,163 --> 00:29:21,998
Hey.
617
00:29:21,998 --> 00:29:23,967
Uh, sorry I haven't been around.
618
00:29:23,967 --> 00:29:25,869
I, uh, just wanted to let you know
619
00:29:25,869 --> 00:29:27,401
that I gave, uh, Chunky Stu...
620
00:29:27,401 --> 00:29:30,854
Uh, sorry, Stuart,
his intestinal transplant today.
621
00:29:30,854 --> 00:29:33,496
It went great. He's...
he's responding well. Oh.
622
00:29:33,496 --> 00:29:35,584
Uh, and I know that
you like to do that thing
623
00:29:35,584 --> 00:29:36,864
where you bring him his favorite food
624
00:29:36,864 --> 00:29:38,555
in a couple of months
when he can handle solids,
625
00:29:38,555 --> 00:29:40,751
so it's, uh, it's hawaiian pizza.
626
00:29:43,210 --> 00:29:45,378
I just thought I should tell you.
627
00:29:47,302 --> 00:29:48,509
Thank you.
628
00:29:53,412 --> 00:29:54,818
I feel like crap.
629
00:29:56,491 --> 00:29:57,729
It should've been me on that plane.
630
00:29:57,729 --> 00:29:59,500
If I could trade places
with you, I would...
631
00:29:59,500 --> 00:30:01,064
I would let you.
632
00:30:03,299 --> 00:30:05,222
I had that thought a lot, too.
633
00:30:06,542 --> 00:30:08,022
And I didn't like myself for it,
634
00:30:08,022 --> 00:30:09,260
but I did.
635
00:30:10,352 --> 00:30:12,348
I kept thinking about my wife and baby
636
00:30:12,348 --> 00:30:15,005
and how you had no wife and no baby.
637
00:30:15,836 --> 00:30:17,269
You had no one.
638
00:30:17,672 --> 00:30:19,685
I only went on that plane
639
00:30:19,685 --> 00:30:21,598
because I was pissed at you.
640
00:30:22,045 --> 00:30:23,618
So I kept wondering...
641
00:30:25,286 --> 00:30:29,704
I'm only here because
he's so selfish and thoughtless.
642
00:30:30,156 --> 00:30:34,274
And no matter how hard
I tried to make him better,
643
00:30:34,895 --> 00:30:36,849
he's still a horrible person.
644
00:30:37,045 --> 00:30:38,251
So now...
645
00:30:40,269 --> 00:30:41,581
I keep wondering...
646
00:30:42,518 --> 00:30:45,516
why this would happen to someone like me
647
00:30:45,527 --> 00:30:47,325
instead of someone like you.
648
00:30:49,162 --> 00:30:51,509
So I guess I'm still pretty pissed off.
649
00:30:55,348 --> 00:30:57,967
Would you get out of my room?
650
00:30:58,348 --> 00:30:59,791
Please.
651
00:31:11,023 --> 00:31:12,825
Hey. Look who's here.
652
00:31:12,825 --> 00:31:14,582
Hey. We just had lunch.
653
00:31:14,582 --> 00:31:17,875
- And now it's back
to the crayon mines for her.
- Hi, baby.
654
00:31:19,621 --> 00:31:21,070
Bye, baby. I'll see you tonight. Mwah.
655
00:31:30,794 --> 00:31:32,181
You need to take her to the park more.
656
00:31:32,181 --> 00:31:33,716
She goes from that
apartment to the day care.
657
00:31:33,716 --> 00:31:35,503
She's indoors all day.
658
00:31:35,725 --> 00:31:36,763
Okay.
659
00:31:36,763 --> 00:31:38,919
Yeah. We should... we should get a house.
660
00:31:38,919 --> 00:31:41,273
Whoa. Slow down.
661
00:31:41,273 --> 00:31:43,255
Then she could have
a yard and she doesn't...
662
00:31:45,228 --> 00:31:46,627
have to be inside...
663
00:31:46,756 --> 00:31:48,044
all the time.
664
00:31:49,793 --> 00:31:51,110
Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
665
00:31:51,217 --> 00:31:52,612
Hey. What's wrong?
666
00:31:52,612 --> 00:31:54,987
Do we have a plan yet?
667
00:31:56,131 --> 00:31:58,729
Do we? We are waiting for
the infection to improve,
668
00:31:58,729 --> 00:32:01,140
and then we will know
what options we have.
669
00:32:01,140 --> 00:32:02,481
Well, if the vancomycin isn't working,
670
00:32:02,481 --> 00:32:04,366
then put me on colistin.
It'll be stronger.
671
00:32:04,366 --> 00:32:06,577
- I understand that it's hard to just...
- No, you don't.
672
00:32:06,577 --> 00:32:10,066
You don't, because you know
what your life is going to be.
673
00:32:10,420 --> 00:32:13,985
You know if you're going to...
take her to the park
674
00:32:13,985 --> 00:32:16,167
or if you're gonna stand
at an O.R. table again.
675
00:32:16,167 --> 00:32:19,978
- You will. Of course you will.
- I know. I know what my options are!
676
00:32:20,189 --> 00:32:21,419
And the longer we wait,
677
00:32:21,419 --> 00:32:23,977
the more that my vascularity diminishes,
678
00:32:23,977 --> 00:32:26,144
the more the nerves die,
the more the muscle atrophies,
679
00:32:26,144 --> 00:32:28,489
and then there's only one option left!
680
00:32:28,489 --> 00:32:29,687
Okay, we are so far from that happening.
681
00:32:29,687 --> 00:32:31,063
Do something, Callie!
682
00:32:31,063 --> 00:32:33,020
You need to do something.
683
00:32:33,206 --> 00:32:35,222
Please. Please don't give up on-on me.
684
00:32:35,222 --> 00:32:36,343
Arizona, I'm not.
685
00:32:36,343 --> 00:32:37,934
- Promise-promise me...
- I-I...
686
00:32:37,934 --> 00:32:39,827
You won't let them take my leg.
687
00:32:41,824 --> 00:32:43,152
I promise.
688
00:32:44,703 --> 00:32:46,975
I do. I promise, okay? I promise you.
689
00:32:49,034 --> 00:32:50,243
It's okay.
690
00:32:53,005 --> 00:32:53,975
This is a good plan.
691
00:32:53,975 --> 00:32:55,210
You're not her doctor.
692
00:32:55,210 --> 00:32:56,499
Oh, I'm not saying I'll do the surgery.
693
00:32:56,499 --> 00:32:57,139
Carlson can do it.
694
00:32:57,139 --> 00:32:59,478
There is a real possibility
she may lose her leg.
695
00:32:59,478 --> 00:33:01,549
- You need to help her prepare for that.
- No, no! No.
696
00:33:01,549 --> 00:33:03,333
An intramedullary nailing
can save the leg.
697
00:33:03,333 --> 00:33:04,497
Define "Save"?
698
00:33:04,497 --> 00:33:06,821
Her leg will never be the same.
699
00:33:06,821 --> 00:33:09,030
A prosthetic can give Arizona
a better quality of life
700
00:33:09,030 --> 00:33:11,557
than years of rehab and chronic pain.
701
00:33:11,557 --> 00:33:12,668
I don't need to tell you this.
702
00:33:12,668 --> 00:33:14,094
No, in fact, it's pretty condescending.
703
00:33:14,094 --> 00:33:16,735
Or the surgery will
make her infection worse
704
00:33:16,735 --> 00:33:17,777
and increase her risk of D.V.T.
705
00:33:17,777 --> 00:33:19,409
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's her leg.
706
00:33:19,409 --> 00:33:20,574
I'm risking it. I am doing it.
707
00:33:20,574 --> 00:33:22,529
You are not doing anything.
708
00:33:22,835 --> 00:33:24,467
She is your wife, not your patient.
709
00:33:24,467 --> 00:33:26,905
She's not, though. She's not my wife!
710
00:33:27,713 --> 00:33:29,202
I...
711
00:33:32,476 --> 00:33:33,928
I don't know who she is.
712
00:33:36,367 --> 00:33:37,947
Did this happen with Cristina?
713
00:33:39,317 --> 00:33:42,205
It's like you're looking at her,
but there's nothing inside?
714
00:33:42,205 --> 00:33:43,642
I feel like she's just this shell.
715
00:33:43,642 --> 00:33:44,877
All the Arizona's been scooped out...
716
00:33:44,877 --> 00:33:46,321
and she's just this shell now,
717
00:33:46,321 --> 00:33:47,866
and I want her back.
718
00:33:49,388 --> 00:33:50,539
And I don't think I'll ever get her back
719
00:33:50,539 --> 00:33:51,541
if we cut off that leg,
720
00:33:51,541 --> 00:33:53,441
so I'm going to save it.
721
00:33:53,441 --> 00:33:56,127
I've made a plan to save it,
and you're gonna get on board.
722
00:33:56,127 --> 00:33:58,273
And then we'll work out
a plan to get Cristina back,
723
00:33:58,273 --> 00:34:00,545
but you need to help me now.
724
00:34:03,745 --> 00:34:05,951
I don't think I'm ever
gonna get Cristina back.
725
00:34:14,259 --> 00:34:17,047
You gonna use a free flap to
cover the open fracture site?
726
00:34:19,500 --> 00:34:20,710
Yeah.
727
00:34:21,086 --> 00:34:22,861
Where are you thinking
about pulling it from?
728
00:34:24,495 --> 00:34:25,726
There we go.
729
00:34:31,051 --> 00:34:32,572
Mwah. That's from Mark.
He's still doing great.
730
00:34:32,572 --> 00:34:34,102
He said to tell you good luck tomorrow.
731
00:34:34,102 --> 00:34:35,980
- Hey, it's still way down.
- Oh.
732
00:34:35,980 --> 00:34:37,597
- Looks good.
- And I haven't eaten since breakfast.
733
00:34:37,597 --> 00:34:39,752
Okay, your surgery's
not till noon tomorrow.
734
00:34:39,752 --> 00:34:41,013
Carlson doesn't care if you eat now.
735
00:34:41,013 --> 00:34:43,477
Well, I'm just... I'm gonna be
an unbelievably good patient.
736
00:34:47,007 --> 00:34:48,257
Oh. Okay.
737
00:34:48,679 --> 00:34:49,684
I have to go.
738
00:34:49,684 --> 00:34:51,101
'Cause you're an unbelievably good doctor.
739
00:34:51,101 --> 00:34:52,357
Say more.
740
00:34:52,392 --> 00:34:53,595
Come here.
741
00:34:54,156 --> 00:34:56,534
My wife is the doctor that's going to fix
742
00:34:56,534 --> 00:34:58,080
Derek Shepherd's million-dollar hand.
743
00:34:58,080 --> 00:34:59,409
She's that good.
744
00:34:59,409 --> 00:35:01,197
Okay, stop. You're freaking me out now.
745
00:35:01,278 --> 00:35:02,601
You...
746
00:35:03,664 --> 00:35:05,182
are outstanding.
747
00:35:05,870 --> 00:35:07,256
And I love you.
748
00:35:09,131 --> 00:35:10,496
I love you, too.
749
00:35:17,933 --> 00:35:20,710
I, uh, brought you a piece
of Chunky Stu's pizza.
750
00:35:21,365 --> 00:35:23,960
He, uh, he's eating tonight,
thanks to you...
751
00:35:24,518 --> 00:35:25,750
Us.
752
00:35:29,660 --> 00:35:31,571
He's out of the woods, so...
753
00:35:32,108 --> 00:35:33,396
I'm out of here.
754
00:35:33,592 --> 00:35:35,518
Um, I'm going to Hopkins.
755
00:35:36,050 --> 00:35:38,082
I've really, uh,
been busting my ass to make sure
756
00:35:38,082 --> 00:35:38,989
everything's run smoothly,
757
00:35:38,989 --> 00:35:41,273
and, uh, now I'm... I'm done.
758
00:35:43,755 --> 00:35:45,058
So just...
759
00:35:46,797 --> 00:35:48,042
good-bye.
760
00:35:58,667 --> 00:35:59,847
I'm sorry this happened to you
761
00:35:59,847 --> 00:36:01,815
and I'm sorry that it made you hate me.
762
00:36:12,931 --> 00:36:14,392
It's Arizona. There's a problem.
763
00:36:14,392 --> 00:36:15,693
- What?
- She's crashing.
764
00:36:15,693 --> 00:36:16,547
Crashing? She's...
765
00:36:16,547 --> 00:36:19,107
Temp's 104, serum lactate is 6.
766
00:36:19,306 --> 00:36:20,202
She's in septic shock.
767
00:36:20,202 --> 00:36:21,803
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
768
00:36:21,803 --> 00:36:22,615
Uh, do you have her on pressors?
769
00:36:22,615 --> 00:36:24,877
I've got her on pressors,
triple antibiotics.
770
00:36:24,877 --> 00:36:26,447
I've got her on aggressive I.V. fluids.
771
00:36:26,447 --> 00:36:27,758
Did you give her supplemental oxygen?
772
00:36:27,758 --> 00:36:30,172
I intubated her. She's crashing.
773
00:36:30,204 --> 00:36:31,503
Do you...
774
00:36:31,512 --> 00:36:33,553
Uh, did you start her
on hy-hydrocortisone?
775
00:36:33,553 --> 00:36:34,172
Yeah.
776
00:36:34,172 --> 00:36:36,304
Um... do you have her on pressors?
777
00:36:36,304 --> 00:36:37,720
Yes, I told you. Yes.
778
00:36:37,720 --> 00:36:40,306
Look, she's still deteriorating.
779
00:36:41,056 --> 00:36:42,390
She's dying.
780
00:36:43,844 --> 00:36:45,096
It's the leg.
781
00:36:45,096 --> 00:36:46,425
It's the leg.
782
00:36:56,020 --> 00:36:57,318
Cut it off.
783
00:37:03,197 --> 00:37:06,998
Go. Just do a good job, please.
Do your best.
784
00:37:13,171 --> 00:37:14,579
Callie, what do you need? What can I do?
785
00:37:14,579 --> 00:37:15,849
Nothing. I'm fine.
786
00:37:23,133 --> 00:37:24,547
I'm fine, really.
787
00:37:26,231 --> 00:37:27,525
I know.
788
00:37:33,673 --> 00:37:34,885
Okay.
789
00:37:40,599 --> 00:37:42,460
"In the event that my heart stops beating"
790
00:37:42,460 --> 00:37:45,507
"and I stop breathing,
I want to be resuscitated."
791
00:37:46,889 --> 00:37:48,601
Well, don't go crazy, but...
792
00:37:49,308 --> 00:37:51,686
If you can get me back, yeah, get me back.
793
00:37:53,635 --> 00:37:55,037
Initial here.
794
00:38:03,307 --> 00:38:04,984
"In the event that I am close to death"
795
00:38:04,984 --> 00:38:06,633
"and life support would only postpone"
796
00:38:06,633 --> 00:38:08,091
"that moment of my death,"
797
00:38:08,091 --> 00:38:11,446
"I, 'a'... want to receive tube feeding,"
798
00:38:11,446 --> 00:38:15,829
"'b'... I want tube feeding only
as my physician recommends,"
799
00:38:15,829 --> 00:38:17,292
"and 'c'..."
800
00:38:19,230 --> 00:38:21,209
"I do not want tube feeding."
801
00:38:21,509 --> 00:38:22,836
Initial one.
802
00:38:32,768 --> 00:38:36,229
This section specifies
a time of withdrawal of care.
803
00:38:37,903 --> 00:38:40,254
"Life-sustaining care shall be withdrawn"
804
00:38:40,342 --> 00:38:43,739
"if signs of recovery are not
seen after a period of..."
805
00:38:44,393 --> 00:38:45,909
30 days.
806
00:38:51,359 --> 00:38:55,971
♪ 'cause if I could see
your face once more ♪
807
00:38:58,078 --> 00:39:02,671
♪ I could die a happy man, I'm sure ♪
808
00:39:05,111 --> 00:39:09,648
♪ When you said your last good-bye ♪
809
00:39:11,650 --> 00:39:16,457
♪ I died a little bit inside ♪
810
00:39:18,258 --> 00:39:22,861
♪ And I lay in tears in bed all night ♪
811
00:39:22,861 --> 00:39:25,279
You've reached Cristina Yang.
Leave a message.
812
00:39:25,341 --> 00:39:28,246
Hey, so I haven't called because...
813
00:39:29,008 --> 00:39:30,256
well...
814
00:39:31,199 --> 00:39:32,892
neither have you, so...
815
00:39:33,663 --> 00:39:35,042
you were right...
816
00:39:35,747 --> 00:39:37,785
about all of it.
817
00:39:38,185 --> 00:39:39,058
You were right.
818
00:39:39,058 --> 00:39:41,538
♪ Take my body ♪
819
00:39:42,603 --> 00:39:45,472
♪ Take my body ♪
820
00:39:46,236 --> 00:39:49,703
♪ All I want is ♪
821
00:39:50,018 --> 00:39:53,727
♪ And all I need is ♪
822
00:39:53,776 --> 00:39:57,369
♪ To find somebody ♪
823
00:39:57,726 --> 00:40:01,062
♪ I'll find somebody ♪
824
00:40:02,261 --> 00:40:06,631
♪ Like you, oh, oh ♪
825
00:40:06,631 --> 00:40:07,956
Crash cart!
826
00:40:07,979 --> 00:40:10,565
This is a place where
horrible things happen.
827
00:40:12,370 --> 00:40:13,714
You were right to go.
828
00:40:13,714 --> 00:40:15,641
You're probably escaping disaster.
829
00:40:15,641 --> 00:40:16,847
Clear!
830
00:40:18,294 --> 00:40:19,611
Uh, will you take her, please?
831
00:40:20,246 --> 00:40:21,478
Take her.
832
00:40:22,061 --> 00:40:23,043
Look at me.
833
00:40:23,043 --> 00:40:24,716
I practically grew up here.
834
00:40:24,716 --> 00:40:26,033
- 10-blade.
- Here you go, doctor.
835
00:40:26,033 --> 00:40:29,034
♪ All I need is ♪
836
00:40:29,319 --> 00:40:31,496
♪ To find somebody ♪
837
00:40:31,496 --> 00:40:32,569
And you're right.
838
00:40:32,569 --> 00:40:33,963
It's hurt me...
839
00:40:36,439 --> 00:40:39,479
in ways I'll probably never get over.
840
00:40:41,734 --> 00:40:43,990
I have a lot of memories of people...
841
00:40:52,962 --> 00:40:54,712
people I've lost forever.
842
00:41:01,004 --> 00:41:03,136
But I have a lot of other memories, too.
843
00:41:11,083 --> 00:41:13,187
This is the place where I fell in love...
844
00:41:27,782 --> 00:41:29,729
The place where I found my family.
845
00:41:38,764 --> 00:41:41,040
This is where I learned to be a doctor...
846
00:41:43,596 --> 00:41:45,400
where I learned how to take responsibility
847
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:47,108
for someone else's life.
848
00:41:48,030 --> 00:41:50,480
And it's the place I met you.
849
00:41:51,456 --> 00:41:53,759
So I figure this place has given me
850
00:41:53,759 --> 00:41:56,072
as much as it's taken from me.
851
00:41:57,144 --> 00:41:59,949
I've lived here as much
as I've survived here.
852
00:42:00,303 --> 00:42:02,388
It just depends on how I look at it.
853
00:42:03,135 --> 00:42:06,051
I'm gonna choose to look at it that way
854
00:42:06,051 --> 00:42:08,097
and remember you that way.
855
00:42:08,097 --> 00:42:09,530
Hope you're good.
856
00:42:10,148 --> 00:42:11,382
Bye.
857
00:42:11,382 --> 00:42:14,537
♪ All I wanted ♪
858
00:42:14,930 --> 00:42:18,549
♪ And all I needed ♪
859
00:42:18,747 --> 00:42:22,210
♪ To find somebody ♪
860
00:42:22,674 --> 00:42:24,851
♪ I'll find somebody ♪
861
00:42:24,851 --> 00:42:26,056
Hello?
862
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:27,844
You are my person.
863
00:42:27,894 --> 00:42:30,610
You will always be my person.
864
00:42:31,649 --> 00:42:40,415
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9999
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