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Previously on Faking It...
2
00:00:01,334 --> 00:00:03,469
Karma and I became friends.
3
00:00:03,570 --> 00:00:05,738
How I've missed talking
about Karma with you.
4
00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:07,473
Karma is just doing
what she always does...
5
00:00:07,574 --> 00:00:09,575
changing who she is to fit
in with the cool crowd.
6
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:12,144
I'm back, and I'm over you.
We should be celebrating!
7
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Not until you own what you did!
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I won't apologize for leaving!
9
00:00:15,282 --> 00:00:16,682
You okay?
10
00:00:16,783 --> 00:00:18,617
It's all good.
11
00:00:21,454 --> 00:00:23,822
Here we are at your public high school
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00:00:23,924 --> 00:00:27,459
that you choose to go to for
reasons I will never comprehend.
13
00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,029
- Summer can't last forever.
- Why not?
14
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It's always summer at our
house in the Maldives.
15
00:00:32,365 --> 00:00:34,033
We can bring my tutor, Katja.
16
00:00:34,134 --> 00:00:35,167
I couldn't leave Shane.
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00:00:35,268 --> 00:00:36,769
He'd have no one to validate him.
18
00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:38,504
I'm guessing you'll see
Karma in there too.
19
00:00:38,605 --> 00:00:40,139
How you feeling about that?
20
00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:41,874
Karma who?
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00:00:41,975 --> 00:00:44,109
[chuckles] Good answer.
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00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:45,878
Thank you for this summer,
23
00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:48,347
for letting me crash at your place...
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00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:50,341
- For all of it.
- It was my pleasure...
25
00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:52,351
sometimes multiple pleasures.
26
00:00:52,452 --> 00:00:54,453
[laughs] But remember,
nothing comes for free.
27
00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:56,188
Oh, yeah? What do you want?
28
00:00:56,289 --> 00:00:57,590
Your ass at dinner next Tuesday.
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00:00:57,691 --> 00:00:59,325
My friend Petal
is getting out of Betty Ford,
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and she's gonna be dying for sushi
31
00:01:01,094 --> 00:01:02,461
and, let's be honest, sake.
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Tuesday's bad, because... drumroll...
33
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[imitating drumroll]
34
00:01:06,633 --> 00:01:09,134
I have my first Bar Mitzvah class.
35
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:13,505
[laughs]
36
00:01:13,607 --> 00:01:14,840
Oh, [bleep], you weren't kidding?
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00:01:14,941 --> 00:01:17,076
No, think it might help me
feel close to my dad.
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Yeah, totally.
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Uh, nothing weird about that.
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I can move Petal to Thursday.
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Let me guess, Bar Mitzvah class.
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Don't worry. Saturday nights...
they're all yours, okay?
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00:01:27,387 --> 00:01:28,954
[clears throat]
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00:01:29,055 --> 00:01:32,057
And I'm looking forward
to your white party.
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00:01:32,158 --> 00:01:33,926
Good. Don't forget
to invite your friends.
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Have Shane do it if you're
too busy being Jewish.
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Just the way I like
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Hester!
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We are back!
50
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After our victory over the school board,
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we are better than ever.
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00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,642
And this year, we're not holding back.
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We're gonna show America
what's possible...
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00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:54,079
[gong sounds]
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From our brand-new hydroponic
herb garden in the cafeteria
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to our solar-powered charging
stations in the quad.
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But Hester isn't just changing
on the outside.
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00:02:01,521 --> 00:02:02,855
We are changing on the inside.
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00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,990
We're becoming the most open, accepting,
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00:02:05,091 --> 00:02:07,359
emotionally safe high school
on the planet.
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00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,261
How? By remembering our new motto...
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sustainability, tolerance, innovation.
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S-T-I!
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00:02:13,366 --> 00:02:16,168
And with your help, we'll share
our STI with the world!
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How did nobody catch that?
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00:02:17,671 --> 00:02:19,471
10 bucks says she makes
hugging mandatory.
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00:02:19,572 --> 00:02:21,974
[laughs] Or recycles our urine
into drinking water.
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00:02:22,075 --> 00:02:24,143
Ugh. If she does,
I am moving back to Dallas.
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00:02:24,244 --> 00:02:28,047
Nope. Not allowed.
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[somber music]
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Let's go eat outside.
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With climate change,
who knows how much longer
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we'll be able to?
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She looks sad.
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I think I really hurt her feelings.
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00:02:39,926 --> 00:02:41,994
Oh, my God,
how are you already caving?
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I'm not caving.
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00:02:43,129 --> 00:02:45,664
Amy, you don't owe Karma an apology.
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00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:47,966
You did what you needed to do
to take care of yourself.
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You evolved, remember?
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00:02:49,302 --> 00:02:51,670
I know, but it's just
hard not to devolve
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when she's right there.
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What if we make her disappear?
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00:02:55,642 --> 00:02:57,209
Okay, now you're creeping me out.
85
00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:58,744
We leak that video you showed me.
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She'd have no choice but to homeschool.
87
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,347
Okay, Lauren, I'm mad at Karma, okay?
88
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:03,549
But I don't want to destroy her.
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00:03:03,650 --> 00:03:06,351
Eventually, we're gonna make up.
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My way's more fun, but whatever.
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00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:10,389
Is that what happened to Lisbeth?
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00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:14,326
[laughs]
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00:03:14,427 --> 00:03:15,494
No, she's looking this way.
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00:03:15,595 --> 00:03:16,662
Look like you're having fun.
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[both laughing]
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00:03:18,798 --> 00:03:21,767
[upbeat music]
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00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:23,469
Oh, like I can't see through that.
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See through what?
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00:03:25,271 --> 00:03:28,340
Oh, uh, just working
on some new song lyrics.
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00:03:28,441 --> 00:03:30,442
It's all good.
101
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,478
Babe, you've been
giving off some really
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intense energy lately.
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00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:37,449
What happened to my chill
girl from this summer?
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She's still here!
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00:03:38,985 --> 00:03:40,853
She's got a tattoo to prove it.
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She's just dealing
with a friend who hurt her.
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Oh, babe, that's rough.
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00:03:46,326 --> 00:03:47,760
It is rough. Thank you.
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Forgiveness is a bitch.
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But once you do it,
you'll both be set free.
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00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:52,831
Well, how can I forgive her
if she won't apologize?
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00:03:52,932 --> 00:03:55,968
Now, see, thinking like that
is the cause of suffering.
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00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,536
Have you tried meditation?
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It can really help your mind shift.
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Yeah, I'm sure that's the answer.
116
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I'm just gonna take these too.
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Thank you.
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00:04:04,110 --> 00:04:07,579
119
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,081
both: Shane!
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00:04:15,488 --> 00:04:16,688
[chuckles nervously]
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I'm just gonna sit over here.
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[softly] I'm sorry.
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[laughs]
125
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Hi.
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00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:27,399
[scoffs]
127
00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:30,402
Still feeling evolved?
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00:04:30,503 --> 00:04:31,537
Yep.
129
00:04:31,638 --> 00:04:33,605
Couldn't care less.
130
00:04:35,475 --> 00:04:38,377
[indie rock music]
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00:04:38,478 --> 00:04:47,719
132
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:49,855
Cherry tree calling me here
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'Cause I'm a maple leaf
headed for...
134
00:04:52,692 --> 00:04:55,093
- Wow.
- Wow good or wow bad?
135
00:04:55,195 --> 00:04:56,328
Wow great.
136
00:04:56,429 --> 00:04:59,765
Liam Booker, what can't
you do with a paintbrush?
137
00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:02,568
Bring my dead dad back to life.
138
00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:03,936
Sorry. That was a joke.
139
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:08,006
But, yeah, it's kind of
what this piece is about.
140
00:05:08,107 --> 00:05:09,575
Shane told me.
141
00:05:09,676 --> 00:05:12,578
I'm so sorry.
142
00:05:12,679 --> 00:05:14,880
Thanks.
143
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:17,216
But, you know,
it's not like I ever met him.
144
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:19,785
Yeah, but I know how much you
wanted to connect with him.
145
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,220
Yeah, I still do.
146
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:25,057
Which is why I signed up
for Bar Mitzvah classes.
147
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,491
Shalom.
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00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:28,794
- Look.
- Wow. That's amazing.
149
00:05:28,895 --> 00:05:30,495
- Liam?
- Thanks.
150
00:05:30,597 --> 00:05:31,830
Liam, you butt-dialed me again.
151
00:05:31,931 --> 00:05:34,032
Really, fantastic.
I kind of grew up Jewish.
152
00:05:34,133 --> 00:05:37,736
My parents are pan-spiritual,
so we celebrate everything.
153
00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:39,204
Judaism's my favorite, though.
154
00:05:39,305 --> 00:05:42,140
It feels like less of
a religion and more like...
155
00:05:42,242 --> 00:05:43,275
Both: An identity.
156
00:05:43,376 --> 00:05:44,643
[chuckles]
157
00:05:44,744 --> 00:05:46,078
You have no idea how nice it is
158
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,480
just to talk to someone who...
who just gets it.
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00:05:48,581 --> 00:05:50,015
[gong sounds]
160
00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:52,618
That's the fourth period gong.
161
00:05:52,719 --> 00:05:53,986
It's good to see you.
162
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:56,054
Yeah, it was good to see you, too.
163
00:05:56,155 --> 00:05:58,223
I heard she's having tigers flown in
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just for the night.
165
00:05:59,392 --> 00:06:00,192
Tigers, Amy!
166
00:06:00,293 --> 00:06:01,860
Ask Shane to get us in.
167
00:06:01,961 --> 00:06:03,462
I would, but I don't want to
give him the satisfaction.
168
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:05,430
I spill way too much to be in
an all-white environment.
169
00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:07,833
Plus, I don't really feel like
talking to Shane right now.
170
00:06:07,934 --> 00:06:08,967
Fine, we'll stay in.
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00:06:09,068 --> 00:06:10,669
But I get to pick the movie.
172
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One more depressing documentary,
173
00:06:12,005 --> 00:06:13,805
and I might become a Democrat.
174
00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:15,340
Why don't you want to talk to me?
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You know why.
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Amy, you can't be upset
with me about lunch.
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I fully intend on sitting
with you tomorrow.
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00:06:21,347 --> 00:06:23,849
I picked Karma because
I knew you were evolved
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00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:26,184
and you wouldn't make
a big deal about it.
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00:06:26,286 --> 00:06:28,353
Trust me, I'm not making
a big deal about it.
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00:06:28,454 --> 00:06:30,889
You can sit with Karma
every day if you want.
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00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:34,059
Matter of fact,
you can sit with her all year.
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00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:35,827
[scoffs] Look, I am on your side.
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00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:37,462
Karma isn't thinking clearly.
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00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:39,865
I think it's because she lacks
the grounding influence
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00:06:39,966 --> 00:06:41,900
of your nightly check-ins before bed.
187
00:06:42,001 --> 00:06:45,938
Hey, isn't tomorrow
the premiere of "Dance Moms"?
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00:06:46,039 --> 00:06:47,572
You two could watch it together.
189
00:06:47,674 --> 00:06:50,275
You could just say you're sorry.
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00:06:50,376 --> 00:06:53,912
It is supposed to be the most
drama-filled season yet.
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You went away for the summer
to save your friendship.
192
00:06:56,449 --> 00:06:58,216
Why walk away now?
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Be the bigger person.
194
00:07:01,454 --> 00:07:03,155
Yeah, Amy.
195
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,824
Give up on your principles
and chase after Karma,
196
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:07,192
just like you always do.
197
00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:08,760
While you're at it, why don't you just
198
00:07:08,861 --> 00:07:11,330
fall back in love with her
all over again?
199
00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,799
No, I left town
to save our friendship.
200
00:07:13,900 --> 00:07:16,635
And to do that,
I need to have boundaries.
201
00:07:16,736 --> 00:07:18,003
There's no way
I'm making the first move.
202
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:19,972
Why would I make the first move?
203
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:21,139
You have Dylan.
204
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:23,942
And more importantly, you have me.
205
00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:26,044
Amy's stuck with Lauren.
206
00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:28,413
- And why is that my fault?
- Ow!
207
00:07:28,514 --> 00:07:29,848
I'm not saying it was.
208
00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:32,384
I'm just saying,
I know how much she misses you.
209
00:07:32,485 --> 00:07:34,619
She told me.
210
00:07:34,721 --> 00:07:35,721
She did?
211
00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:37,089
Through body language.
212
00:07:37,190 --> 00:07:38,423
She's hoping you two make up
213
00:07:38,524 --> 00:07:40,525
before the season premiere
of "Dance Moms."
214
00:07:40,626 --> 00:07:43,228
It is supposed to be the most
drama-filled season yet.
215
00:07:43,329 --> 00:07:45,797
Maybe you should
just drop this whole thing.
216
00:07:45,898 --> 00:07:48,166
After all, Amy did fall
in love with you.
217
00:07:48,267 --> 00:07:50,102
Everyone always takes Amy's side.
218
00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:52,237
But it's not like
I wanted this to happen.
219
00:07:52,338 --> 00:07:53,872
And from the second I found out
about her feelings,
220
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,607
I've done everything I can to make sure
221
00:07:55,708 --> 00:07:56,975
our friendship survived,
222
00:07:57,076 --> 00:07:58,810
including forgiving her
for sleeping with Liam.
223
00:07:58,911 --> 00:08:00,779
I didn't just run away
when things got hard.
224
00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:02,481
- Ah!
- I'm sorry.
225
00:08:02,582 --> 00:08:04,316
That's exactly what I told Amy.
226
00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:06,418
- You did?
- Yeah.
227
00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:07,586
What did she say?
228
00:08:07,687 --> 00:08:09,588
She asked me to make sure
229
00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:11,289
that you go to Zita's white party
230
00:08:11,391 --> 00:08:13,125
because she is ready to apologize.
231
00:08:13,226 --> 00:08:15,227
Seriously?
232
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,729
That's a weird place for her to choose.
233
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:20,458
I thought so too, but she insisted.
234
00:08:21,601 --> 00:08:22,801
Okay.
235
00:08:22,902 --> 00:08:24,803
I'm gonna go wash
your feet off my hands,
236
00:08:24,904 --> 00:08:27,672
and then we have to discuss
outfit ideas.
237
00:08:27,774 --> 00:08:29,608
Yay.
238
00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:32,411
[cell phone clicking, bloops]
239
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,846
[Phase's "I'm in Love
with My Life" playing]
240
00:08:34,947 --> 00:08:36,982
I'm in love with my life
241
00:08:37,083 --> 00:08:39,651
My first white party... fancy.
242
00:08:39,752 --> 00:08:41,820
And not nearly as racist as it sounds.
243
00:08:41,921 --> 00:08:43,622
I'm so glad you changed your mind.
244
00:08:43,723 --> 00:08:45,057
You seemed so opposed.
245
00:08:45,158 --> 00:08:46,758
Well, I just felt like
I would kick myself
246
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:49,428
if I didn't see the tigers.
247
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:50,595
Where are they?
248
00:08:50,696 --> 00:08:53,665
Quick selfie for my followers.
249
00:08:53,766 --> 00:08:55,767
[camera shutter clicks]
250
00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:58,570
They appreciate
my aspirational lifestyle.
251
00:08:58,671 --> 00:09:00,038
252
00:09:00,139 --> 00:09:01,640
You know it
253
00:09:01,741 --> 00:09:02,974
Okay, got my pic. Let's go.
254
00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:04,543
Wait. We just got here.
255
00:09:04,644 --> 00:09:08,013
And... I didn't even get
to use my stain stick yet.
256
00:09:08,114 --> 00:09:10,015
You don't want to spend
the whole night avoiding
257
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:12,084
she-who-won't-be-named-
and-shouldn't-be-here.
258
00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:13,952
Well, maybe I don't have to.
259
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:16,121
Apparently, Karma is ready
to put this all behind us.
260
00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:17,689
And I didn't even have to cave.
261
00:09:17,790 --> 00:09:18,857
Yay, principles.
262
00:09:18,958 --> 00:09:22,994
Let me guess... Shane told you this.
263
00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:25,197
Will you excuse me?
264
00:09:25,298 --> 00:09:29,201
Come and lose yourself
a little while
265
00:09:29,302 --> 00:09:31,269
Dance with me, Starfish.
266
00:09:31,370 --> 00:09:32,437
Uh...
267
00:09:32,538 --> 00:09:35,340
I think I should stay
in this general vicinity,
268
00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:38,376
you know, just in case
someone needs to talk.
269
00:09:38,478 --> 00:09:40,078
I'm a safe space.
270
00:09:40,179 --> 00:09:42,247
I dig how selfless you are.
271
00:09:42,348 --> 00:09:45,984
272
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:48,186
I'm in love with my life
273
00:09:48,287 --> 00:09:49,855
Come and lose yourself
274
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:50,822
Oh, yay.
275
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,457
I see Karma's here.
276
00:09:52,558 --> 00:09:53,758
Take a chance
277
00:09:53,860 --> 00:09:54,993
Oh, uh, yeah.
278
00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:57,329
- Shane must've invited her.
- Great.
279
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,764
Then she won't miss your big surprise.
280
00:09:59,866 --> 00:10:01,600
Wait, what are you talking about?
281
00:10:01,701 --> 00:10:03,768
I'm in love with my,
I'm in love with my
282
00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:05,804
Hello. Everyone, good evening.
283
00:10:05,905 --> 00:10:07,839
Hi. Thank you so much for coming.
284
00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:10,308
Uh, slight change of plans.
285
00:10:10,409 --> 00:10:13,345
Tonight's white party is actually...
286
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:17,616
Liam Booker's surprise Bar Mitzvah!
287
00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:20,652
[upbeat Jewish music]
288
00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:25,323
289
00:10:25,424 --> 00:10:27,459
Oh, my God.
290
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,928
291
00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:32,397
Not too bad for a shiksa, right?
292
00:10:32,498 --> 00:10:34,733
I just wanted to show you that I get it.
293
00:10:34,834 --> 00:10:36,601
Yeah, this is...
294
00:10:36,702 --> 00:10:38,069
Wow. [chuckles]
295
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:40,639
Whoo, a-a Bar Mitzvah.
296
00:10:40,740 --> 00:10:42,774
Oh, you.
297
00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:44,075
I knew you'd love it.
298
00:10:44,177 --> 00:10:45,243
Okay, I'll be right back.
299
00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:48,180
I got a few more surprises up my sleeve.
300
00:10:50,016 --> 00:10:51,383
What did you do now?
301
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,385
[sighs] I got gelt on my shirt.
302
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:55,620
No, Amy said you told her
Karma's backing down,
303
00:10:55,721 --> 00:10:56,955
but I'm not buying it.
304
00:10:57,056 --> 00:10:59,257
- What's your scheme?
- Glad you asked.
305
00:10:59,358 --> 00:11:01,426
For this challenge,
I knew simple would work best.
306
00:11:01,527 --> 00:11:03,395
Karma and Amy are dying
to get back together,
307
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,330
but they're both too stubborn
to back down.
308
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:07,999
I knew I just had to get them
in the same room and, "voil?"!
309
00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:09,534
And you think
they're just gonna make up?
310
00:11:09,635 --> 00:11:11,236
What show have you been watching?
311
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,238
Those two can't stay mad at each other.
312
00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:15,840
It's only a matter of time
before their teary reunion.
313
00:11:15,942 --> 00:11:16,908
Oh, here we go.
314
00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:18,210
[playful music]
315
00:11:18,311 --> 00:11:19,711
Grab your Kleenex.
316
00:11:19,812 --> 00:11:22,814
317
00:11:22,915 --> 00:11:25,517
- Hey.
- Hey.
318
00:11:25,618 --> 00:11:26,885
So...
319
00:11:26,986 --> 00:11:29,721
So...
320
00:11:29,822 --> 00:11:30,922
So?
321
00:11:31,023 --> 00:11:33,325
So?
322
00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:35,894
So!
323
00:11:35,995 --> 00:11:38,530
So?
324
00:11:38,631 --> 00:11:40,465
So...
325
00:11:40,566 --> 00:11:41,900
So...
326
00:11:42,001 --> 00:11:43,568
- So!
- So!
327
00:11:43,669 --> 00:11:45,604
- So?
- So!
328
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:48,173
329
00:11:48,274 --> 00:11:50,809
Looks like your plan
was just a little too simple,
330
00:11:50,910 --> 00:11:53,845
- just like you.
- [scoffs]
331
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:55,781
I've made up my mind
332
00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:57,516
There aren't many
Bar Mitzvahs on Maui.
333
00:11:57,617 --> 00:11:58,917
Are they always this crazy?
334
00:11:59,018 --> 00:12:01,820
This one is definitely all bar
and no mitzvah.
335
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:05,733
It's a joke. Never mind.
336
00:12:05,834 --> 00:12:07,158
Hey! May I cut in?
337
00:12:07,259 --> 00:12:08,659
Go right ahead.
338
00:12:08,761 --> 00:12:10,762
I'm gonna grab a bagel
and carbo-load for this funkfest
339
00:12:10,863 --> 00:12:12,029
that's about to unfold.
340
00:12:12,131 --> 00:12:14,132
- Do it, brah.
- Yay.
341
00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:15,466
You lied to me, Shane!
342
00:12:15,567 --> 00:12:16,768
Amy didn't apologize!
343
00:12:16,869 --> 00:12:18,870
Apparently, she had a micro-stroke
344
00:12:18,971 --> 00:12:20,404
and couldn't stop saying "so."
345
00:12:20,506 --> 00:12:21,806
Enough!
346
00:12:21,907 --> 00:12:24,218
And even if she did apologize,
it wouldn't matter,
347
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:25,601
because I am done.
348
00:12:25,695 --> 00:12:26,544
Oh, please!
349
00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:28,859
We all know you're gonna get
back together.
350
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:30,203
You don't know that.
351
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:31,716
Friendships end.
352
00:12:31,817 --> 00:12:34,919
We had a good run,
and we made some great memories,
353
00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:36,587
but I've moved on.
354
00:12:36,688 --> 00:12:39,323
If that's true,
then why do you still have
355
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:42,460
her EpiPen in your purse?
356
00:12:42,561 --> 00:12:45,863
Like she's the only person
here with a severe nut allergy.
357
00:12:45,964 --> 00:12:50,701
358
00:12:50,803 --> 00:12:52,136
Mazel tov, Booker.
359
00:12:52,237 --> 00:12:53,638
This is my first Bar Mitzvah.
360
00:12:53,739 --> 00:12:56,240
I heard we're supposed to do this.
361
00:12:56,341 --> 00:12:57,442
Don't spend it all in one place.
362
00:12:57,543 --> 00:12:58,843
No, I can't take your money!
363
00:12:58,944 --> 00:13:00,478
This isn't a real Bar Mitzvah.
364
00:13:00,579 --> 00:13:03,047
Liam, have you tried
the bacon-wrapped scallops?
365
00:13:03,148 --> 00:13:04,081
Who invented these things?
366
00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:05,316
Not the Jews.
367
00:13:05,417 --> 00:13:07,452
Shellfish and pork are not kosher.
368
00:13:07,553 --> 00:13:09,220
- Oh.
- I'll be right back.
369
00:13:09,321 --> 00:13:10,621
370
00:13:10,722 --> 00:13:12,323
Hey, Zita. Do you have a second?
371
00:13:12,424 --> 00:13:14,058
- Can we talk?
- There he is...
372
00:13:14,159 --> 00:13:15,660
the man of the hour!
373
00:13:15,761 --> 00:13:16,561
Um, boys?
374
00:13:16,662 --> 00:13:18,362
Boys, can you drop the curtain?
375
00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:22,233
[playful music]
376
00:13:22,334 --> 00:13:25,169
Dude, you got to show me
your ab regimen.
377
00:13:25,270 --> 00:13:27,638
[laughs] That's funny.
378
00:13:27,739 --> 00:13:28,806
We'll be right back.
379
00:13:28,907 --> 00:13:30,074
Let's go this way.
380
00:13:30,175 --> 00:13:32,276
This is such a fun party
you've thrown me.
381
00:13:32,377 --> 00:13:34,445
- Ah, such a fun Bar Mitzvah.
- That's the thing.
382
00:13:34,546 --> 00:13:37,048
You realize this isn't
an actual Bar Mitzvah, right?
383
00:13:37,149 --> 00:13:38,349
Sure it is.
384
00:13:38,450 --> 00:13:40,218
I grew up in Scarsdale.
I went to tons of them.
385
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:41,686
And all my friends wished
they could skip
386
00:13:41,787 --> 00:13:43,711
the boring Hebrew classes
and get to the fun part.
387
00:13:43,812 --> 00:13:44,693
And you get to.
388
00:13:44,718 --> 00:13:46,234
The boring part is why I'm doing this.
389
00:13:46,335 --> 00:13:48,326
I want to connect to my dad
and my heritage.
390
00:13:48,427 --> 00:13:49,927
I don't care about the stupid party.
391
00:13:50,028 --> 00:13:52,096
How can you say you get it
if you don't get that?
392
00:13:52,197 --> 00:13:54,398
Well, I do now.
393
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,167
I can't believe
I was so close to caving.
394
00:13:56,268 --> 00:13:57,735
But you didn't. That's progress.
395
00:13:57,836 --> 00:13:59,370
And now you know to avoid Shane.
396
00:13:59,471 --> 00:14:01,172
- He cannot be trusted.
- Mm-mm.
397
00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:02,373
Speak of the devil.
398
00:14:02,474 --> 00:14:04,642
Amy, I'm sorry for lying to you.
399
00:14:04,743 --> 00:14:06,878
I tried to meddle,
and I just made things worse.
400
00:14:06,979 --> 00:14:07,645
I feel terrible.
401
00:14:07,746 --> 00:14:09,647
Beware his forked tongue.
402
00:14:09,748 --> 00:14:12,016
So, to show you how sorry I am,
403
00:14:12,117 --> 00:14:13,918
I brought you this Jewish doughnut.
404
00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:15,286
Your favorite.
405
00:14:15,387 --> 00:14:17,488
- You know me so well.
- [laughs]
406
00:14:17,589 --> 00:14:19,957
- Nuh!
- Lauren!
407
00:14:20,058 --> 00:14:21,259
There are nuts in this!
408
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:22,693
He was trying to poison you!
409
00:14:22,794 --> 00:14:24,428
- [gasps]
- Okay, let's not exaggerate.
410
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:25,796
Amy was never going to die,
411
00:14:25,898 --> 00:14:28,132
because Karma was going
to swoop in and rescue her.
412
00:14:28,233 --> 00:14:30,601
She still keeps Amy's EpiPen
in her purse.
413
00:14:30,702 --> 00:14:32,336
- Aw, she does?
- Yeah, how sweet, right?
414
00:14:32,437 --> 00:14:33,538
Caving.
415
00:14:33,639 --> 00:14:34,633
Amy, who are you gonna listen to...
416
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:37,357
me or the guy who just
tried to kill you?
417
00:14:37,458 --> 00:14:38,992
[sighs]
418
00:14:39,093 --> 00:14:43,630
Excuse me while I go wash off
this nut dust and betrayal.
419
00:14:43,731 --> 00:14:45,298
Really, Shane?
420
00:14:45,399 --> 00:14:47,367
- That was a little desperate.
- I'm just trying to help her.
421
00:14:47,468 --> 00:14:49,269
Karma and Amy need to get back together.
422
00:14:49,370 --> 00:14:51,337
Why... so you don't have to
choose who to sit with at lunch?
423
00:14:51,439 --> 00:14:52,539
Exactly.
424
00:14:52,640 --> 00:14:54,240
Because the longer this goes on,
the more likely it is
425
00:14:54,341 --> 00:14:56,209
that I will have to choose
one of them one day for good.
426
00:14:56,310 --> 00:14:58,378
And I don't want to have to do that.
427
00:14:58,479 --> 00:15:00,847
But you wouldn't understand.
You've never had two friends.
428
00:15:00,948 --> 00:15:02,582
Karma and Amy aren't friends.
429
00:15:02,683 --> 00:15:05,718
They're a giant ball of chaos
that leaves nothing but pain
430
00:15:05,820 --> 00:15:07,420
and devastation in its wake.
431
00:15:07,521 --> 00:15:09,756
I think Amy would be better off
investing in new relationships.
432
00:15:09,857 --> 00:15:11,157
Like yours?
433
00:15:11,258 --> 00:15:12,992
I wasn't referencing me specifically,
434
00:15:13,094 --> 00:15:15,161
but, yes, I could be
a part of that group.
435
00:15:15,262 --> 00:15:19,866
Lauren, I say this to you
as a friend... ly person.
436
00:15:19,967 --> 00:15:22,302
Don't get too used
to being Amy's number one.
437
00:15:22,403 --> 00:15:24,771
Karma and Amy will make up,
and soon you'll be back
438
00:15:24,872 --> 00:15:26,072
to being number two...
439
00:15:26,173 --> 00:15:27,207
three.
440
00:15:27,308 --> 00:15:29,242
Honestly, it's more like four.
441
00:15:29,343 --> 00:15:33,446
442
00:15:33,547 --> 00:15:37,517
God, I wish men had
to experience this just once.
443
00:15:37,618 --> 00:15:38,885
Do you mind if I cut?
444
00:15:38,986 --> 00:15:40,487
I just touched some nuts.
445
00:15:40,588 --> 00:15:43,556
446
00:15:43,657 --> 00:15:44,924
I'm just washing my hands!
447
00:15:45,025 --> 00:15:51,131
448
00:15:51,232 --> 00:15:53,032
I'm glad I'm not
the only one with this idea.
449
00:15:53,134 --> 00:15:54,567
Yay, women's rights.
450
00:15:54,668 --> 00:15:57,403
[toilet flushes]
451
00:15:57,505 --> 00:16:00,406
[tense music]
452
00:16:00,508 --> 00:16:02,609
453
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:08,600
[humming]
454
00:16:09,502 --> 00:16:13,605
Uh, I'm gonna go.
455
00:16:14,707 --> 00:16:16,608
[both giggle]
456
00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:19,811
So this party's crazy, huh?
457
00:16:19,912 --> 00:16:21,346
Yeah.
458
00:16:21,447 --> 00:16:25,049
It's like it's all bar and no mitzvah.
459
00:16:28,053 --> 00:16:29,988
Here.
460
00:16:30,089 --> 00:16:31,856
[solemn music]
461
00:16:31,957 --> 00:16:33,024
Thanks.
462
00:16:33,125 --> 00:16:39,264
463
00:16:39,365 --> 00:16:41,232
- [door opens]
- [sighs]
464
00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:44,702
Hey. Can we talk? I need to vent.
465
00:16:44,804 --> 00:16:45,904
Sure.
466
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,273
Though I think your people
would call it "kvetching."
467
00:16:48,374 --> 00:16:49,908
Hey, you see how ridiculous
this is, right?
468
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:52,744
I mean, how can Zita not see
that this isn't a Bar Mitzvah?
469
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,145
And you know what?
470
00:16:54,246 --> 00:16:55,680
It's borderline offensive to my people.
471
00:16:55,781 --> 00:16:57,248
[laughs] Okay, slow down, Moses.
472
00:16:57,349 --> 00:16:58,650
Give the poor girl some credit.
473
00:16:58,751 --> 00:17:00,685
She may not understand
what you're going through,
474
00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:02,320
but at least she cares enough about you
475
00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:03,555
to try and celebrate it.
476
00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:04,923
Where have I gone?
477
00:17:05,024 --> 00:17:06,457
Yeah, maybe you're right.
478
00:17:06,559 --> 00:17:09,127
Trust me... fighting
doesn't solve anything.
479
00:17:09,228 --> 00:17:10,395
It just keeps you apart.
480
00:17:10,496 --> 00:17:12,363
And isn't it better to be together?
481
00:17:12,464 --> 00:17:14,265
[chuckles]
482
00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:16,434
Oh, man, I am such an idiot.
483
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:17,769
Just go to her and tell her
484
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:19,804
you're ready to put
all of this behind you.
485
00:17:19,905 --> 00:17:21,105
I will.
486
00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:24,008
Thanks, Karma.
487
00:17:24,109 --> 00:17:26,477
What was all that about?
488
00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:28,947
Shane, I'm ready to put
this all behind me.
489
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:29,881
With Liam?
490
00:17:29,982 --> 00:17:31,749
No. Well, I mean, yes.
491
00:17:31,851 --> 00:17:33,184
But, no, with Amy.
492
00:17:33,285 --> 00:17:34,853
We just had the best time
in the men's room.
493
00:17:34,954 --> 00:17:37,021
I'm not sure how to respond to that.
494
00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:38,323
She cracked the same joke I did.
495
00:17:38,424 --> 00:17:39,958
It's a sign.
496
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,193
I don't want to keep fighting.
I just want our friendship back.
497
00:17:42,294 --> 00:17:43,795
I did it.
498
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,898
Maybe you should go grab her
and drag her to the dance floor?
499
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:48,199
I've got a better idea.
500
00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:50,497
Got a 20? I need to bribe the DJ.
501
00:17:50,598 --> 00:17:51,836
Huh?
502
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:54,006
[upbeat music]
503
00:17:54,107 --> 00:17:56,808
Hey, Zita. Can we talk?
504
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:58,810
Look, I get this isn't
a real Bar Mitzvah,
505
00:17:58,912 --> 00:18:00,779
but everyone here expects you
to have that moment
506
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:02,314
where you get lifted up
in the stupid chair.
507
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,916
So could you just suck it up and do it?
508
00:18:04,017 --> 00:18:05,250
Look, I'm sorry, okay?
509
00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:07,556
I was focused on everything
you were doing wrong,
510
00:18:07,658 --> 00:18:10,455
and a friend helped me see all
the things you're doing right.
511
00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:13,525
You're trying, and what
I should have said is...
512
00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:15,160
thank you.
513
00:18:15,261 --> 00:18:16,895
514
00:18:16,996 --> 00:18:19,231
Wait. Which friend?
515
00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:22,634
This is one of those times
I wish I didn't hate lying.
516
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:24,002
Of course it was Karma.
517
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,672
["Hava Nagila" playing]
518
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,106
No, no, no, guys! Put me down!
519
00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:30,142
What are the chances
that she and I would sneak
520
00:18:30,243 --> 00:18:31,677
into the men's bathroom
at the same time?
521
00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:32,792
The universe wants us to make up!
522
00:18:32,817 --> 00:18:35,013
No! The universe wants you
to stop using men's restrooms.
523
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:36,215
Okay, Amy, listen to me.
524
00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:37,716
You are just looking
for reasons to cave.
525
00:18:37,817 --> 00:18:39,218
Maybe I should.
526
00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:42,487
I was gonna leave for the summer
without saying good-bye.
527
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:44,823
I don't think it's caving
if I just apologize for that.
528
00:18:44,924 --> 00:18:46,024
That is a gateway apology!
529
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:47,659
You have got to hold your ground.
530
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:49,228
Lauren, you need to back off a little.
531
00:18:49,329 --> 00:18:50,929
I know you don't like Karma,
but she's my best friend.
532
00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:53,365
Okay, no... It is not
that I don't like Karma.
533
00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,801
It's that I don't like
how she hurts you.
534
00:18:55,902 --> 00:18:57,369
She plays mind games.
535
00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:58,370
She does not.
536
00:18:58,471 --> 00:18:59,805
What about that kiss in the pool?
537
00:18:59,906 --> 00:19:01,540
She was drunk.
She hardly remembers it.
538
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,108
But you can't forget it.
539
00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:05,844
Every time you try and move on,
she sucks you back in,
540
00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:08,146
only to hurt you over and over and over.
541
00:19:08,248 --> 00:19:10,148
So you do what you want,
but I can't stand by
542
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:12,117
and watch you get hurt one more time.
543
00:19:12,218 --> 00:19:14,119
Karma would never hurt me on purpose.
544
00:19:14,220 --> 00:19:16,822
[Paula Abdul's "Straight Up" playing]
545
00:19:16,923 --> 00:19:18,657
That's our song.
546
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:20,459
Karma's making the first move.
547
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:21,660
548
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:23,795
Amy, wait.
549
00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:26,632
It took Karma
to help you appreciate me?
550
00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:28,133
I hired a PI to find your dad.
551
00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:30,335
I flew you to Jerusalem
so you could meet your family.
552
00:19:30,436 --> 00:19:32,271
But nothing I do matters,
because apparently,
553
00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:34,172
I'll never get you like Karma.
554
00:19:34,274 --> 00:19:35,941
Guys, will you put me down?
555
00:19:36,042 --> 00:19:37,509
-
Baby, I'm moving
-
Moving
556
00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:40,011
- That is not how I feel.
- I heard you say it.
557
00:19:40,112 --> 00:19:43,115
- You butt-dialed me at lunch.
- No, I want to be with you.
558
00:19:43,216 --> 00:19:45,584
Karma?
559
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,486
No, no, no, that came out wrong.
560
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:50,555
Hey, Liam, did you happen to
see Amy when you were up there?
561
00:19:50,657 --> 00:19:53,425
I think you're only with me
because you can't be with her.
562
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:56,528
-
Love me forever
-
Oh, oh, oh
563
00:19:56,629 --> 00:20:00,399
When I'm caught in a hit-and-run
564
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:03,135
See? Mind games.
565
00:20:03,236 --> 00:20:04,670
Let's upload that video.
566
00:20:04,771 --> 00:20:06,104
Oh, oh, oh
567
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:07,973
Or are you just having fun?
568
00:20:08,074 --> 00:20:09,574
What the hell was that?
569
00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:10,676
Jealous?
570
00:20:10,777 --> 00:20:12,477
He's all yours.
571
00:20:12,578 --> 00:20:16,515
-
Want to love me forever
-
Oh, oh, oh
572
00:20:16,616 --> 00:20:19,418
Babe, I love this song.
573
00:20:19,519 --> 00:20:21,153
Straight up now tell me
574
00:20:21,254 --> 00:20:23,855
Is it gonna be you and me together?
575
00:20:23,956 --> 00:20:25,290
Oh, oh, oh
576
00:20:25,391 --> 00:20:29,628
Or are you just having fun?
577
00:20:29,678 --> 00:20:34,228
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