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1
00:00:00,813 --> 00:00:02,407
Katie: Time for school.
2
00:00:06,207 --> 00:00:07,940
Morning, Baby Doll.
3
00:00:08,002 --> 00:00:09,802
What's the trash bag for?
4
00:00:09,870 --> 00:00:13,105
My ponies are my best friends
in the whole world.
5
00:00:13,174 --> 00:00:15,207
If there's a fire, they need to survive.
6
00:00:15,276 --> 00:00:17,243
Fire drill!
7
00:00:17,311 --> 00:00:19,478
[Clattering]
8
00:00:19,547 --> 00:00:21,013
Katie: What's more troubling...
9
00:00:21,082 --> 00:00:23,882
the fact that plastic ponies
are her best friends,
10
00:00:23,951 --> 00:00:25,417
or that she's planning on letting
11
00:00:25,486 --> 00:00:27,808
the rest of us burn in our beds?
12
00:00:28,956 --> 00:00:30,990
[Sighs]
13
00:00:31,058 --> 00:00:32,222
Oliver: Come in!
14
00:00:32,247 --> 00:00:34,627
Soon as they hit 12, you learn to knock.
15
00:00:34,695 --> 00:00:36,895
You learn the hard way.
16
00:00:36,964 --> 00:00:38,931
Hey, Oliver.
17
00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:40,466
New shirt looks good.
18
00:00:40,534 --> 00:00:41,767
I can't be seen in this.
19
00:00:41,836 --> 00:00:42,868
What?
20
00:00:42,937 --> 00:00:44,403
You begged me to buy you
that polo shirt.
21
00:00:44,472 --> 00:00:46,405
Yes, but not from an outlet mall.
22
00:00:46,474 --> 00:00:48,707
What the hell difference
does it make where it's from?
23
00:00:48,776 --> 00:00:50,843
Outlet malls sell
the flawed reject shirts.
24
00:00:50,911 --> 00:00:53,812
Look at the cricket player.
Look at his bat.
25
00:00:53,881 --> 00:00:55,914
It's defective. The bat's bent.
26
00:00:55,983 --> 00:00:58,250
The bat's bent!
27
00:00:58,319 --> 00:00:59,451
So?
28
00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:01,353
Classic tell of a discount purchase.
29
00:01:01,422 --> 00:01:03,722
Oliver, it is not a big deal.
30
00:01:03,791 --> 00:01:06,458
Honestly, without any drama, for real,
31
00:01:06,527 --> 00:01:08,927
this is the worst thing
that's ever happened to anyone.
32
00:01:08,996 --> 00:01:10,429
Okay, well, guess what.
33
00:01:10,498 --> 00:01:13,132
I bought you the [bleep] shirt
so you're going to wear it!
34
00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:16,368
There's two types of parents...
Ones who curse at their kids...
35
00:01:16,437 --> 00:01:19,809
and the ones who lie and say
they don't curse at their kids.
36
00:01:20,641 --> 00:01:25,411
37
00:01:25,479 --> 00:01:27,813
[Sighs deeply]
38
00:01:27,882 --> 00:01:30,131
Taylor, why are you still in bed?!
39
00:01:31,588 --> 00:01:32,653
[Thud]
40
00:01:32,678 --> 00:01:33,678
Taylor: Ow!
41
00:01:38,225 --> 00:01:41,393
Greg, you can't possibly
still be in the bathroom.
42
00:01:41,462 --> 00:01:44,263
I was almost done,
but you just spooked it back in!
43
00:01:44,332 --> 00:01:46,465
[Sighs]
44
00:01:46,534 --> 00:01:49,301
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
45
00:01:51,843 --> 00:01:56,975
[Whinnying]
46
00:01:57,044 --> 00:01:58,143
Honey, could you stop doing that?
47
00:01:58,212 --> 00:01:59,545
I don't think I can, Daddy.
48
00:01:59,613 --> 00:02:01,113
[Whinnies]
49
00:02:02,616 --> 00:02:05,117
I'd like to revisit
our earlier conversation.
50
00:02:05,186 --> 00:02:07,920
There's nothing wrong with
clothes from an outlet mall.
51
00:02:07,988 --> 00:02:09,621
That's where Mom bought me this sweater.
52
00:02:09,690 --> 00:02:11,423
It's cashmere.
53
00:02:11,492 --> 00:02:13,892
It's a blend, and it's going to pill.
54
00:02:15,663 --> 00:02:17,830
You don't even know
what I'm talking about.
55
00:02:17,898 --> 00:02:20,332
I am not going to buy you a $90 shirt.
56
00:02:20,401 --> 00:02:22,641
If you want it that bad,
you can get an after-school job.
57
00:02:22,703 --> 00:02:23,802
- This is Westport.
- So?
58
00:02:23,871 --> 00:02:25,904
That's just not a thing
kids do around here.
59
00:02:25,973 --> 00:02:27,639
Cooper Bradford doesn't lift a finger
60
00:02:27,708 --> 00:02:28,941
and has his own credit card.
61
00:02:29,009 --> 00:02:30,242
I'm not asking for that.
62
00:02:30,311 --> 00:02:32,444
Greg, he's not asking
for his own credit card.
63
00:02:32,513 --> 00:02:34,680
That is an inspiring tale
of self-sacrifice.
64
00:02:34,749 --> 00:02:37,182
Hey, things are done
a certain way in this town.
65
00:02:37,251 --> 00:02:38,384
Don't you want me to fit in?
66
00:02:38,452 --> 00:02:40,352
No. I don't.
67
00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:42,154
I reject every message
that this town sends...
68
00:02:42,223 --> 00:02:44,256
that the car that you drive
or the clothes that you wear
69
00:02:44,325 --> 00:02:46,225
make you better than someone else.
70
00:02:46,293 --> 00:02:48,327
Who says you need money to be happy?
71
00:02:48,396 --> 00:02:49,628
I said it twice today already.
72
00:02:53,968 --> 00:02:56,168
You can't possibly be proud of that.
73
00:02:56,237 --> 00:02:58,270
- It has a plus in it.
- It also has a C in it.
74
00:02:58,339 --> 00:02:59,571
C's get degrees.
75
00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:00,973
No. C's get their parents
76
00:03:01,041 --> 00:03:03,108
to co-sign for their car loans
in their 40's.
77
00:03:03,177 --> 00:03:04,610
Don't worry about me.
78
00:03:04,678 --> 00:03:07,045
I'll get an athletic scholarship
to a mid-level junior college,
79
00:03:07,114 --> 00:03:08,380
marry well, play tennis.
80
00:03:08,449 --> 00:03:10,649
You can live in our guest house.
Not year round.
81
00:03:10,718 --> 00:03:12,785
I'll handle her. You take him.
82
00:03:12,853 --> 00:03:15,721
[Whinnies]
83
00:03:15,790 --> 00:03:18,023
We'll let that one slip through
the cracks for the time being.
84
00:03:18,092 --> 00:03:21,226
You and I are gonna get
your math grade up.
85
00:03:21,295 --> 00:03:22,795
This is what I get for bragging.
86
00:03:22,863 --> 00:03:24,096
And if you want a new shirt,
87
00:03:24,165 --> 00:03:25,525
you can earn money by doing chores.
88
00:03:25,566 --> 00:03:27,599
Will do.
89
00:03:27,668 --> 00:03:30,202
90
00:03:33,007 --> 00:03:35,247
Mnh-mnh. I know that smile.
91
00:03:35,325 --> 00:03:37,509
You cannot have Anna-Kat
do your work for you.
92
00:03:37,578 --> 00:03:40,412
What? It's good for her OCD.
Let a playa play.
93
00:03:40,481 --> 00:03:42,714
No chores, no shirt.
94
00:03:42,783 --> 00:03:45,384
I'm not getting invited to
Autumn Summers' birthday party.
95
00:03:45,453 --> 00:03:46,493
What makes you think that?
96
00:03:46,554 --> 00:03:47,920
Because since we moved here,
97
00:03:47,988 --> 00:03:51,028
I've never been invited
to anyone's birthday party.
98
00:03:51,192 --> 00:03:53,959
[Sighs] Trying to raise these three kids
99
00:03:54,028 --> 00:03:56,295
to be normal in Westport
takes so much work.
100
00:03:56,363 --> 00:03:58,397
God, why'd I have to be so fertile?
101
00:03:58,466 --> 00:04:00,299
[School bell rings]
102
00:04:00,367 --> 00:04:01,667
[Indistinct conversations]
103
00:04:01,735 --> 00:04:03,435
Put your books down.
104
00:04:03,504 --> 00:04:07,172
People are gonna think
that you've got boobs coming in.
105
00:04:07,241 --> 00:04:09,341
Which one is Autumn Summers?
106
00:04:09,410 --> 00:04:10,876
Purple bow.
107
00:04:10,945 --> 00:04:13,512
Ohh. She's the one
who dresses like her mom.
108
00:04:13,581 --> 00:04:15,447
- Hi!
- Hi!
109
00:04:15,516 --> 00:04:16,548
[Smooching]
110
00:04:16,617 --> 00:04:17,950
Autumn and I jogged here this morning.
111
00:04:18,018 --> 00:04:19,184
Ugh!
112
00:04:19,253 --> 00:04:21,086
I should, too. I'm getting so chubby.
113
00:04:21,125 --> 00:04:24,189
- Ugh!
- No, I'm getting so chubby.
114
00:04:24,258 --> 00:04:25,958
Ugh!
115
00:04:26,026 --> 00:04:27,559
Yep, that one go away from me.
116
00:04:28,162 --> 00:04:29,561
Hey!
117
00:04:29,630 --> 00:04:31,029
Meat is murder.
118
00:04:31,098 --> 00:04:32,798
Now, go cry to your mother,
you little murderer!
119
00:04:32,867 --> 00:04:35,667
So, no hot dogs at that birthday party.
120
00:04:35,736 --> 00:04:37,069
Don't worry, Sweetie.
121
00:04:37,137 --> 00:04:39,371
I'll get you invited to that party.
122
00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:41,273
Really? You promise?
123
00:04:41,342 --> 00:04:43,742
Mm-hmm. Pony pinky promise.
124
00:04:43,811 --> 00:04:46,879
[Whinnying]
125
00:04:48,782 --> 00:04:52,048
[Whinnying continues]
126
00:04:52,126 --> 00:04:53,685
If Anna-Kat's going to fit in,
127
00:04:53,754 --> 00:04:55,821
she'll have to be a little less weird.
128
00:04:55,890 --> 00:04:58,490
When you say it in your head,
you don't have to say "unique."
129
00:04:58,559 --> 00:05:01,326
I want her to have friends.
Lots of friends.
130
00:05:01,395 --> 00:05:03,228
Not plastic ponies.
131
00:05:03,297 --> 00:05:06,298
I'm not even hungry.
That's how upset I am.
132
00:05:06,367 --> 00:05:07,966
I'm still eating it.
133
00:05:08,035 --> 00:05:09,035
Isn't there a rule
134
00:05:09,103 --> 00:05:10,623
where everyone in the class is invited?
135
00:05:10,671 --> 00:05:11,937
- Mnh-mnh.
- They don't do that here.
136
00:05:12,006 --> 00:05:13,906
Kids are taught to feel like garbage
137
00:05:13,974 --> 00:05:16,308
at a much younger age in Westport.
138
00:05:16,377 --> 00:05:18,810
I have to figure out a way
for her to fit in better.
139
00:05:20,314 --> 00:05:23,782
It might also help
if you could fit in better, too.
140
00:05:23,851 --> 00:05:26,485
You think I'm the reason
that she's not getting invited?
141
00:05:26,554 --> 00:05:28,754
Well, it's not the kids
who send out the Evites, Katie.
142
00:05:28,822 --> 00:05:30,155
- It's the moms.
- Yeah.
143
00:05:30,224 --> 00:05:31,557
And at the parties,
the kids hang out with the kids
144
00:05:31,625 --> 00:05:33,258
and the moms hang out with the moms.
145
00:05:33,327 --> 00:05:35,160
And the moms know you can't stand them.
146
00:05:35,229 --> 00:05:37,258
Mm. Katie, they like you about as much
147
00:05:37,312 --> 00:05:39,097
as a Catholic priest likes a tattletale.
148
00:05:39,166 --> 00:05:40,179
[Laughs]
149
00:05:40,204 --> 00:05:41,867
You guys don't like them, either.
150
00:05:41,936 --> 00:05:43,156
But they don't know
that I don't like them.
151
00:05:43,181 --> 00:05:44,870
- I don't let on.
- And I do?
152
00:05:44,939 --> 00:05:46,838
- Katie, we love you.
- Like a sister.
153
00:05:46,907 --> 00:05:48,707
Your sister opened
six credit cards in your name
154
00:05:48,732 --> 00:05:49,641
and fled to Honduras.
155
00:05:49,710 --> 00:05:51,243
Not specifically my sister.
156
00:05:51,312 --> 00:05:53,845
Whenever you're on a mommy e-mail chain,
157
00:05:53,914 --> 00:05:57,259
you always reply,
"Really, guys?" or "Not it!"
158
00:05:57,284 --> 00:05:58,150
Yep.
159
00:05:58,218 --> 00:06:01,153
So to get Anna-Kat invited,
I have to fake liking them?
160
00:06:01,221 --> 00:06:02,654
- Yes.
- No.
161
00:06:02,723 --> 00:06:04,423
I'm not selling out to this town.
162
00:06:04,491 --> 00:06:06,191
Listen, if these women were drowning,
163
00:06:06,260 --> 00:06:07,893
I wouldn't throw them a life jacket.
164
00:06:07,962 --> 00:06:09,061
I mean, of course they'd be fine
165
00:06:09,129 --> 00:06:10,028
because fake boobies float.
166
00:06:10,097 --> 00:06:11,530
But the point is,
167
00:06:11,599 --> 00:06:14,066
I play the game
so that my kids get invited.
168
00:06:14,134 --> 00:06:16,034
If you want Anna-Kat
to go to these parties,
169
00:06:16,103 --> 00:06:17,469
you're gonna have to suck it up
170
00:06:17,538 --> 00:06:19,746
and play with the Westport moms.
171
00:06:19,771 --> 00:06:21,039
Yep.
172
00:06:21,108 --> 00:06:23,609
If I have to, I will.
173
00:06:23,677 --> 00:06:25,243
Ugh. I just lost my appetite.
174
00:06:25,312 --> 00:06:26,745
- Great.
- I'm still eating it.
175
00:06:26,814 --> 00:06:27,814
Damn it.
176
00:06:29,825 --> 00:06:32,158
177
00:06:32,227 --> 00:06:35,262
Are you starting to get
the cleaning tingles?
178
00:06:35,330 --> 00:06:37,864
I love the cleaning tingles.
179
00:06:37,933 --> 00:06:39,799
And to determine the vector, you...?
180
00:06:39,868 --> 00:06:41,375
I don't remember.
181
00:06:41,436 --> 00:06:42,869
You don't remember or you're not trying?
182
00:06:42,938 --> 00:06:44,938
Both.
183
00:06:45,007 --> 00:06:49,643
Okay, dinner tonight
is last night's, plus Cheetos.
184
00:06:49,711 --> 00:06:51,711
Where are you going, Mama?
185
00:06:51,780 --> 00:06:53,546
To get you invited to that party.
186
00:06:53,615 --> 00:06:55,515
A real birthday party?
187
00:06:55,584 --> 00:06:57,751
- Yeah.
- It's finally happening!
188
00:06:57,819 --> 00:06:59,285
[Chuckles]
189
00:07:01,623 --> 00:07:03,636
Here's the intel on Tara Summers...
190
00:07:03,691 --> 00:07:06,266
dresses like her kid, yoga body,
and is a militant vegetarian.
191
00:07:06,291 --> 00:07:08,311
- Not even bacon.
- No vegetarian eats bacon.
192
00:07:08,380 --> 00:07:10,046
Some make an exception,
like in a Cobb salad.
193
00:07:10,115 --> 00:07:11,781
- No.
- I don't have time to argue.
194
00:07:11,850 --> 00:07:13,083
I have to hit the Pressed Juice Bar
195
00:07:13,151 --> 00:07:15,385
right when the 4:00 yoga class
is letting out.
196
00:07:15,454 --> 00:07:17,921
Do I look like a Westport mom?
197
00:07:17,990 --> 00:07:20,490
You're wearing black
baked potatoes on your feet.
198
00:07:20,559 --> 00:07:22,759
They're clogs.
They're perfectly acceptable.
199
00:07:22,828 --> 00:07:24,327
If you work in a vet's office.
200
00:07:24,396 --> 00:07:26,162
To be clear, you're selling out
your beliefs
201
00:07:26,231 --> 00:07:27,416
to befriend a woman you can't stand
202
00:07:27,441 --> 00:07:29,766
to get Anna-Kat invited to a party
with girls you don't approve of?
203
00:07:29,835 --> 00:07:32,235
No one wants to have sex with
a sarcastic summarizer, Greg.
204
00:07:34,106 --> 00:07:35,505
[Door slams]
205
00:07:35,574 --> 00:07:38,742
It's a different lesson.
Okay, here we go.
206
00:07:38,810 --> 00:07:40,143
207
00:07:40,212 --> 00:07:41,311
[Indistinct conversations]
208
00:07:41,380 --> 00:07:42,779
[Bell jingles]
209
00:07:42,848 --> 00:07:45,482
Hi, everyone.
210
00:07:45,550 --> 00:07:47,317
All: Hi!
211
00:07:47,386 --> 00:07:50,353
I'm Katie.
Our girls are in the same class?
212
00:07:50,422 --> 00:07:52,989
Yes, I see you
at drop off... staring at me.
213
00:07:53,058 --> 00:07:54,357
Because I love your outfits.
214
00:07:54,426 --> 00:07:56,826
I want to start dressing
like a 7-year old, too.
215
00:07:56,895 --> 00:07:59,229
Came out wrong, but
I'm just gonna plow forward.
216
00:07:59,297 --> 00:08:00,964
[Scoffs] You do yoga?
217
00:08:01,033 --> 00:08:05,001
I have decided that it's time
to embrace a healthy lifestyle.
218
00:08:05,070 --> 00:08:06,836
I just want to immerse myself
219
00:08:06,905 --> 00:08:09,172
in all that this community has to offer.
220
00:08:09,241 --> 00:08:12,008
- Oh.
- That is so great!
221
00:08:12,077 --> 00:08:14,110
I know!
222
00:08:14,179 --> 00:08:15,578
Any pointers for me?
223
00:08:15,647 --> 00:08:17,147
[Gasps] I've got an
aesthetician for you.
224
00:08:17,215 --> 00:08:19,349
- You need a personal trainer.
- And a personal shopper.
225
00:08:19,418 --> 00:08:20,684
Can't say for certain,
226
00:08:20,752 --> 00:08:21,751
but I have a feeling
you'll need my waxer.
227
00:08:21,820 --> 00:08:22,852
Mm-hmm.
228
00:08:22,921 --> 00:08:24,387
Thanks, you guys.
229
00:08:24,456 --> 00:08:26,656
They will never know how close
they just came to death.
230
00:08:26,725 --> 00:08:29,759
Eye on the prize...
invitation for Anna-Kat.
231
00:08:29,828 --> 00:08:32,529
I am really interested
in becoming a vegetarian.
232
00:08:32,597 --> 00:08:34,798
- Oh!
- Wonderful.
233
00:08:34,866 --> 00:08:38,301
With you becoming a vegetarian,
we're gonna save so many animals.
234
00:08:38,370 --> 00:08:39,836
- Oh, yes.
- Yes.
235
00:08:39,905 --> 00:08:41,090
- [Beeping]
- Oh!
236
00:08:41,115 --> 00:08:43,395
Yoga's starting. Let's head back in.
237
00:08:44,009 --> 00:08:46,276
Come on, Katie!
238
00:08:46,344 --> 00:08:48,078
I thought class was over.
239
00:08:48,146 --> 00:08:50,480
Oh, that's the 4:00.
We're also doing the 5:30.
240
00:08:50,549 --> 00:08:51,549
Ugh!
241
00:08:51,583 --> 00:08:52,782
Yeah!
242
00:08:52,851 --> 00:08:54,895
Ugh, yeah!
243
00:08:55,253 --> 00:09:00,190
I wouldn't do this for Greg,
for Oliver, or for Taylor...
244
00:09:00,258 --> 00:09:02,125
[Woman gasps, screams, thud]
245
00:09:02,194 --> 00:09:05,161
...but for Anna-Kat, I'll do anything.
246
00:09:05,230 --> 00:09:06,796
Hi!
247
00:09:06,865 --> 00:09:10,400
Does having a favorite
make me a bad mom?
248
00:09:10,469 --> 00:09:12,202
I don't care.
249
00:09:12,270 --> 00:09:13,903
That makes me a bad mom.
250
00:09:13,972 --> 00:09:16,272
What's the definition
of the perfect square?
251
00:09:16,341 --> 00:09:17,974
You. [Chuckles]
252
00:09:18,043 --> 00:09:19,342
Good burn. Wrong answer.
253
00:09:19,411 --> 00:09:22,378
Taylor, come on.
We've been at this for a week.
254
00:09:22,447 --> 00:09:24,347
Dad, just face it,
I don't get this stuff.
255
00:09:24,416 --> 00:09:26,750
There is no not getting it.
There's just not trying.
256
00:09:26,818 --> 00:09:29,052
Really, Dad? Quoting Yoda?
257
00:09:29,121 --> 00:09:31,054
[Pencil clatters]
258
00:09:31,123 --> 00:09:35,759
That's "Do or do not. There is no try."
259
00:09:37,996 --> 00:09:39,295
Come with me, Nerd.
260
00:09:39,364 --> 00:09:41,564
Just because I know "Star Wars"
doesn't make me a...
261
00:09:41,633 --> 00:09:43,099
All right, I'll go.
262
00:09:43,168 --> 00:09:44,634
263
00:09:44,703 --> 00:09:46,803
[Ball bounces]
264
00:09:46,872 --> 00:09:49,506
See? I get this. Sports.
265
00:09:49,574 --> 00:09:51,014
Taylor, there's more to life than...
266
00:09:51,042 --> 00:09:52,809
Your turn.
267
00:09:52,878 --> 00:09:55,078
This ball seems huge. Is it regulation?
268
00:09:56,114 --> 00:09:57,547
Okay. I got this.
269
00:10:00,519 --> 00:10:02,952
I got it. Totally... I'm all in.
270
00:10:05,557 --> 00:10:07,891
See? You're not good at sports.
271
00:10:07,959 --> 00:10:09,025
I'm not good at school.
272
00:10:09,094 --> 00:10:10,527
It's just not who I am,
273
00:10:10,595 --> 00:10:13,429
like being normally coordinated
is just not who you are.
274
00:10:13,498 --> 00:10:16,866
I wish my parents had pushed me
to be better at sports.
275
00:10:16,935 --> 00:10:19,402
They coddled me,
and they let me quit too easily.
276
00:10:19,471 --> 00:10:21,738
I wish I could talk business
on the links
277
00:10:21,807 --> 00:10:23,473
or play a pick-up game with the guys.
278
00:10:23,542 --> 00:10:24,641
What guys?
279
00:10:24,709 --> 00:10:26,910
You know, the guys. My guys.
280
00:10:28,113 --> 00:10:29,379
All right, I have no guys.
281
00:10:29,447 --> 00:10:31,948
But the point is, I take
no pride in being a bad athlete.
282
00:10:32,017 --> 00:10:34,117
You shouldn't take pride
in being a bad student.
283
00:10:34,186 --> 00:10:35,919
But I'm perfectly happy with my grades.
284
00:10:35,987 --> 00:10:37,053
You should be, too.
285
00:10:38,957 --> 00:10:41,491
Look, Taylor, I'm not giving up.
286
00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:43,960
Wha...
287
00:10:44,029 --> 00:10:46,396
Greg Otto down by two.
288
00:10:46,464 --> 00:10:50,033
Seconds on the clock. He shoots and...
289
00:10:50,101 --> 00:10:53,169
- Run!
- We live here.
290
00:10:58,944 --> 00:11:00,910
[Sighs deeply]
291
00:11:00,979 --> 00:11:02,178
Yoga.
292
00:11:02,247 --> 00:11:03,479
Hi, Mama.
293
00:11:03,548 --> 00:11:05,448
Hey, Honey.
Is that the card for the party?
294
00:11:05,517 --> 00:11:07,584
That's a lot of glitter.
295
00:11:07,652 --> 00:11:09,886
Daddy says it looks like
a stripper sneezed on it.
296
00:11:09,955 --> 00:11:12,755
In my defense,
I didn't think she heard me.
297
00:11:12,824 --> 00:11:15,692
So, how'd it got with
the Real Housewives of Westport?
298
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,595
After spending some time
around these women,
299
00:11:18,663 --> 00:11:20,496
I'm starting to feel
some sympathy for them.
300
00:11:20,565 --> 00:11:21,731
Get this.
301
00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:24,133
They have never been
to the Olive Garden.
302
00:11:24,202 --> 00:11:26,135
[Cellphone chimes]
303
00:11:26,204 --> 00:11:29,973
Doris says the Evites went out.
Lindsay Coolidge just got hers.
304
00:11:31,409 --> 00:11:34,377
Mine should just be right...
305
00:11:34,446 --> 00:11:37,347
Hm.
306
00:11:37,415 --> 00:11:39,215
It's just gonna take a second.
307
00:11:39,284 --> 00:11:40,783
I'll just refresh.
308
00:11:40,852 --> 00:11:42,418
[Banging on keypad]
309
00:11:42,487 --> 00:11:43,887
Is there a problem, Mama?
310
00:11:43,955 --> 00:11:46,022
No, Sweetie. Mnh-mnh.
311
00:11:46,091 --> 00:11:46,823
[Tapping]
312
00:11:46,892 --> 00:11:49,125
Refresh. Refresh.
313
00:11:49,194 --> 00:11:50,593
Refresh.
314
00:11:50,662 --> 00:11:53,022
Hey, Sweetie, why don't you
finish your card upstairs, okay?
315
00:11:53,064 --> 00:11:54,964
- Okay, Daddy.
- Good girl.
316
00:11:57,102 --> 00:11:58,668
Maybe it's just taking
a little bit longer.
317
00:11:58,737 --> 00:12:00,970
- Don't all Evites go out at once?
- I don't know!
318
00:12:01,039 --> 00:12:02,572
I didn't build the Internet, Greg!
319
00:12:02,641 --> 00:12:06,376
[Tapping]
320
00:12:07,979 --> 00:12:09,412
[Sighs]
321
00:12:10,482 --> 00:12:12,448
I didn't get invited.
322
00:12:12,517 --> 00:12:13,811
Anna-Kat didn't get invited.
323
00:12:13,860 --> 00:12:15,752
Yes, Anna-Kat. That's what I meant.
324
00:12:15,820 --> 00:12:17,382
I can't believe
all the things that I did
325
00:12:17,444 --> 00:12:18,788
to fit in with those idiots.
326
00:12:18,857 --> 00:12:20,990
I'm growing back
everything that I waxed.
327
00:12:21,059 --> 00:12:22,889
Well, I got two weeks.
328
00:12:22,994 --> 00:12:24,160
Yeah.
329
00:12:27,925 --> 00:12:29,358
I don't understand it!
330
00:12:29,427 --> 00:12:31,501
All week long, I was friendly Katie.
331
00:12:31,526 --> 00:12:32,697
Perky Katie.
332
00:12:32,722 --> 00:12:34,876
The kind of Katie
who charmed your entire family.
333
00:12:34,901 --> 00:12:37,115
I was rehearsal-dinner Katie.
334
00:12:37,168 --> 00:12:38,267
Whoa.
335
00:12:38,336 --> 00:12:40,002
Maybe the move to Westport
was a bad idea.
336
00:12:40,071 --> 00:12:42,204
I'm an outcast. Anna-Kat's an outcast.
337
00:12:42,273 --> 00:12:43,839
And Oliver's becoming a douche.
338
00:12:43,908 --> 00:12:44,940
Katie.
339
00:12:45,009 --> 00:12:46,875
And Taylor's goal in life
is to marry rich
340
00:12:46,944 --> 00:12:49,144
and drink those stupid
pressed juices all day.
341
00:12:49,213 --> 00:12:51,614
Yeah. Maybe moving to Westport
was a bad idea.
342
00:12:51,682 --> 00:12:53,616
What are you doing?
343
00:12:53,684 --> 00:12:54,817
What?
344
00:12:54,885 --> 00:12:56,418
Don't agree with me. I'm spiraling.
345
00:12:56,487 --> 00:12:58,180
You're job is to say
that we did the right thing.
346
00:12:58,227 --> 00:13:00,222
That is Greg and Katie 101, man.
347
00:13:00,291 --> 00:13:02,658
Listen, I'm sorry that Anna-Kat
wasn't invited to the party,
348
00:13:02,727 --> 00:13:04,167
but you shouldn't have promised her.
349
00:13:04,228 --> 00:13:05,527
Now we have to go tell her.
350
00:13:05,596 --> 00:13:07,162
[Sighs] It's gonna break
her little heart.
351
00:13:07,231 --> 00:13:09,698
- Where are you going?
- To rake the leaves.
352
00:13:09,767 --> 00:13:12,034
- It's nighttime.
- Yeah, I realize that.
353
00:13:12,103 --> 00:13:13,235
This way, nobody sees me,
354
00:13:13,304 --> 00:13:14,970
and I won't have to suffer
the humiliation
355
00:13:15,039 --> 00:13:17,673
of being the only kid in town
who does yard work.
356
00:13:17,742 --> 00:13:18,907
[Door closes]
357
00:13:18,976 --> 00:13:20,376
See?
358
00:13:20,444 --> 00:13:23,045
- He's a douche.
- Yeah.
359
00:13:23,114 --> 00:13:25,781
I like your fur. It's very shiny.
360
00:13:25,850 --> 00:13:28,376
Uh-oh. Both parents. That's never good.
361
00:13:28,469 --> 00:13:33,305
Honey, there's a problem with the party.
362
00:13:33,374 --> 00:13:34,473
But you promised!
363
00:13:34,542 --> 00:13:36,775
And I made a birthday card
and everything.
364
00:13:36,844 --> 00:13:39,178
Sweetie, a lot of times
with the kids' birthday parties,
365
00:13:39,246 --> 00:13:40,679
they can't invite the whole class.
366
00:13:40,748 --> 00:13:42,514
It's expensive,
and there isn't enough room.
367
00:13:42,583 --> 00:13:45,684
Autumn's parents are renting out
the whole aquarium.
368
00:13:45,753 --> 00:13:48,153
Okay, that's a piece
of information I was missing,
369
00:13:48,222 --> 00:13:49,455
and it changes things.
370
00:13:49,523 --> 00:13:52,291
You know what I did when
Jay Zambelli didn't invite me
371
00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:54,226
to his birthday party at Six Flags?
372
00:13:54,295 --> 00:13:56,695
- What, Daddy?
- I had the best day.
373
00:13:56,764 --> 00:13:58,998
My parents took me to the aquar... ium.
374
00:14:00,901 --> 00:14:02,067
Katie, anything?
375
00:14:02,136 --> 00:14:04,136
This couldn't be sadder.
376
00:14:04,205 --> 00:14:06,572
Will you guys have a party with me?
377
00:14:06,641 --> 00:14:08,707
That made it sadder.
378
00:14:08,776 --> 00:14:11,276
379
00:14:11,345 --> 00:14:15,014
Just a couple of lonely girls
having a pony pity party.
380
00:14:15,082 --> 00:14:16,082
- Hey!
- Hey.
381
00:14:16,263 --> 00:14:18,317
- Hey!
- Hey!
382
00:14:18,386 --> 00:14:21,186
What are you guys doing here?
383
00:14:21,255 --> 00:14:23,088
Greg called us.
He told us what happened.
384
00:14:23,157 --> 00:14:25,090
Entenmann's Louisiana crunch cake.
385
00:14:25,159 --> 00:14:26,258
And if that doesn't work,
386
00:14:26,327 --> 00:14:28,827
I'll stop by Carvel
and get a Cookie Puss.
387
00:14:28,896 --> 00:14:32,031
All right, Anna-Kat,
let's get you up to bed.
388
00:14:32,099 --> 00:14:33,265
You okay, Sweetie?
389
00:14:33,334 --> 00:14:34,967
Yeah. I guess. You?
390
00:14:35,036 --> 00:14:37,536
I'll be all right.
391
00:14:37,605 --> 00:14:40,072
I know what'll cheer you up.
392
00:14:40,141 --> 00:14:42,174
We'll YouTube some videos
of the Hindenburg.
393
00:14:42,243 --> 00:14:43,609
36 fatalities...
394
00:14:43,678 --> 00:14:47,613
13 passengers, 22 crewman,
and one on the ground.
395
00:14:47,682 --> 00:14:49,982
Okay.
396
00:14:51,952 --> 00:14:54,687
How cute are those little legs?
397
00:14:54,755 --> 00:14:57,456
How could anyone not want
those legs at a party?
398
00:14:57,525 --> 00:14:59,158
Or mine for that matter?
399
00:14:59,226 --> 00:15:01,627
[Chuckles] So, what happened?
400
00:15:01,696 --> 00:15:04,363
I don't know where I went wrong.
401
00:15:04,432 --> 00:15:06,098
Hi!
402
00:15:06,167 --> 00:15:07,766
- Nailed it, right?
- Dead on.
403
00:15:07,835 --> 00:15:09,735
Actually felt my sphincter
clench with rage.
404
00:15:09,804 --> 00:15:11,770
[Laughs] Katie, come on.
405
00:15:11,839 --> 00:15:13,605
You really want to be friends
with those women?
406
00:15:13,674 --> 00:15:14,907
Of course not.
407
00:15:14,975 --> 00:15:17,176
But I want them
to want to be friends with me.
408
00:15:17,244 --> 00:15:18,844
Up until now, I've been rejecting them.
409
00:15:18,913 --> 00:15:20,245
I just assumed
410
00:15:20,314 --> 00:15:21,680
that they would want me
to be a part of their group
411
00:15:21,749 --> 00:15:23,382
if I gave them the chance.
412
00:15:23,451 --> 00:15:24,817
Now I put myself out there,
413
00:15:24,885 --> 00:15:26,819
and I'm back in high school
dealing with Holly Platt.
414
00:15:26,887 --> 00:15:27,720
- Aw.
- Mm.
415
00:15:27,788 --> 00:15:29,288
- She iced you out?
- No.
416
00:15:29,356 --> 00:15:32,024
Other way around.
I was super cool in high school.
417
00:15:32,093 --> 00:15:34,993
But for the first time,
I know how she felt.
418
00:15:35,062 --> 00:15:37,996
If I had a time machine,
I'd go back and apologize.
419
00:15:38,065 --> 00:15:39,695
You could just find her
on Facebook and apologize.
420
00:15:39,734 --> 00:15:41,967
Ugh! But then I'd have to log in,
421
00:15:42,036 --> 00:15:43,836
and it would just...
422
00:15:43,904 --> 00:15:45,804
I just swept. You guys are
getting crumbs everywhere.
423
00:15:45,873 --> 00:15:47,673
[Muffled] Oh! Oh, what's that?
424
00:15:47,742 --> 00:15:51,210
Oh, I'm sorry. Oh.
I can't hear you, Oliver
425
00:15:51,278 --> 00:15:52,845
[Sighs] Grow up, Doris.
426
00:15:55,416 --> 00:15:58,350
I love messing with that kid.
427
00:15:58,419 --> 00:16:01,120
[Chuckling] I'm such a bully.
It's super unhealthy.
428
00:16:01,188 --> 00:16:03,655
We cannot let Tara Summers
get away with this.
429
00:16:03,724 --> 00:16:05,858
- We have to do something.
- Like what?
430
00:16:05,926 --> 00:16:07,726
Remember that Mel Gibson movie,
"The Patriot"?
431
00:16:07,762 --> 00:16:08,894
When they gathered the townspeople,
432
00:16:08,963 --> 00:16:10,963
locked them in the church,
and then burned it to the ground?
433
00:16:11,031 --> 00:16:12,431
Go on.
434
00:16:12,500 --> 00:16:15,434
I'm going to do that to those
moms at the Pressed Juice Bar.
435
00:16:15,503 --> 00:16:17,143
Okay. Well,
you're gonna have to volunteer
436
00:16:17,204 --> 00:16:19,138
a whole lot more at school
if all those moms are dead.
437
00:16:19,206 --> 00:16:22,775
Fine. Then you come up with something.
438
00:16:22,843 --> 00:16:26,145
Actually, I think
I know what might work.
439
00:16:26,213 --> 00:16:28,480
[Rock music plays]
440
00:16:28,549 --> 00:16:30,149
Tara Summers' house,
441
00:16:30,217 --> 00:16:32,742
home of Westport's meanest vegetarian.
442
00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:35,320
We're not egging her house
or T.P.ing it.
443
00:16:35,389 --> 00:16:36,855
We are above that.
444
00:16:38,363 --> 00:16:41,057
But we are not above raising
old meat on her flagpole.
445
00:16:41,082 --> 00:16:42,175
[Laughter] Yeah!
446
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:43,979
That's wasn't meant to sound dirty.
447
00:16:44,048 --> 00:16:45,647
It's the perfect revenge.
448
00:16:45,716 --> 00:16:47,750
Vandalism makes me feel so much better.
449
00:16:47,818 --> 00:16:49,151
I love you guys.
450
00:16:49,220 --> 00:16:51,820
- No one messes with our Katie.
- Amen.
451
00:16:51,889 --> 00:16:53,300
To survive in Westport,
452
00:16:53,363 --> 00:16:56,525
I found out all you really need
are two good friends.
453
00:16:56,594 --> 00:16:58,260
Some say you need just one.
454
00:16:58,329 --> 00:17:00,662
I like two just in case
one of them dies.
455
00:17:00,731 --> 00:17:01,797
[Dogs barking]
456
00:17:01,866 --> 00:17:03,499
Run for it! Go! Go!
457
00:17:03,567 --> 00:17:06,935
Is that how you run?
I've never seen you run before!
458
00:17:07,004 --> 00:17:08,670
You don't look so great, either!
459
00:17:08,739 --> 00:17:11,874
Hanging with Doris
and Angela gave me an idea.
460
00:17:11,942 --> 00:17:13,709
I found out that, for whatever reason,
461
00:17:13,778 --> 00:17:16,378
two other girls were also
not invited to Autumn's party.
462
00:17:16,447 --> 00:17:18,480
Anna-Kat doesn't need 100 friends.
463
00:17:18,549 --> 00:17:20,482
Two is plenty.
464
00:17:20,551 --> 00:17:24,219
Maybe Rajni and Eyeball Shirt
will be her partners in crime.
465
00:17:24,288 --> 00:17:26,321
[Girls laughing]
466
00:17:28,125 --> 00:17:31,226
Hey, Taylor. This is Ashley and Lavi.
467
00:17:31,295 --> 00:17:32,767
- Hi.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
468
00:17:32,792 --> 00:17:33,729
So pretty.
469
00:17:33,798 --> 00:17:35,063
Thank you. [Chuckles]
470
00:17:35,132 --> 00:17:37,466
Oh, and quite the student.
Check out this math test.
471
00:17:37,535 --> 00:17:40,035
She got a C-minus.
472
00:17:40,104 --> 00:17:43,172
- I'm sure she...
- Dad, what are you doing?
473
00:17:43,240 --> 00:17:45,484
Well, you said I should be fine with
your grades, so I'm being fine.
474
00:17:45,509 --> 00:17:46,608
[Chuckles]
475
00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:48,020
I'm so proud of my average daughter.
476
00:17:48,045 --> 00:17:49,711
[Nervous laughter]
477
00:17:50,981 --> 00:17:52,247
Looking sharp.
478
00:17:52,316 --> 00:17:55,336
Polo shirt purchased
at Ed Mitchell's at full price.
479
00:17:55,402 --> 00:17:58,704
See, Scoobs, you appreciate it more
when you work hard for it.
480
00:17:58,772 --> 00:18:00,572
You're so right, Mom.
481
00:18:02,309 --> 00:18:03,876
Cleaning out the closets?
482
00:18:03,944 --> 00:18:06,245
Yes.
483
00:18:06,313 --> 00:18:08,280
Me too. Did you get a thank you?
484
00:18:08,349 --> 00:18:09,848
No.
485
00:18:09,917 --> 00:18:12,184
- No one appreciates us.
- Mm-hmm.
486
00:18:12,253 --> 00:18:14,553
- Oliver.
- Luz.
487
00:18:14,622 --> 00:18:16,355
Throwing away a good shirt?
488
00:18:16,423 --> 00:18:19,591
It's not good. See?
489
00:18:19,660 --> 00:18:21,326
The bat is askew.
490
00:18:22,549 --> 00:18:25,774
I can re-stitch this in two minutes,
make it good as new.
491
00:18:25,799 --> 00:18:27,399
- You can?
- Mm-hmm.
492
00:18:27,468 --> 00:18:30,135
If I bought a whole bunch
of these defective shirts,
493
00:18:30,204 --> 00:18:31,637
would you fix them for me?
494
00:18:31,705 --> 00:18:34,206
Why? So you can resell them
to kids for a profit?
495
00:18:34,275 --> 00:18:38,377
Luz, we could be partners. 70-30.
496
00:18:38,445 --> 00:18:40,746
Don't mess with me, boy.
497
00:18:40,814 --> 00:18:42,347
50-50.
498
00:18:46,020 --> 00:18:48,553
Why are you doing your evil smile?
499
00:18:48,622 --> 00:18:50,768
This is my everyday adorable smile.
500
00:18:51,425 --> 00:18:53,182
501
00:18:53,207 --> 00:18:55,250
Maybe I jumped the gun about Westport.
502
00:18:55,319 --> 00:18:58,055
Things are looking up
for the Otto family.
503
00:18:58,648 --> 00:19:02,267
Oliver has learned a little something
about having a work ethic.
504
00:19:02,336 --> 00:19:04,069
And Taylor realizes
505
00:19:04,138 --> 00:19:07,539
that C's are not something
to be proud of.
506
00:19:12,279 --> 00:19:14,680
- [Whinnying]
- And Anna-Kat...
507
00:19:14,748 --> 00:19:17,049
- [Whinnying]
- ...just might have two good friends.
508
00:19:17,117 --> 00:19:18,750
[Screams, laughs]
509
00:19:18,775 --> 00:19:21,009
Or maybe just one good friend.
510
00:19:25,528 --> 00:19:26,660
511
00:19:26,729 --> 00:19:30,197
[Whinnying]
512
00:19:30,266 --> 00:19:31,932
Did you have fun today?
513
00:19:32,001 --> 00:19:34,368
It wasn't the aquarium, but it was fun.
514
00:19:34,436 --> 00:19:35,936
Hey, forget about the aquarium.
515
00:19:36,005 --> 00:19:37,838
We're gonna do
something great ourselves.
516
00:19:37,907 --> 00:19:40,741
How about we take you to the Disney...
517
00:19:40,810 --> 00:19:43,043
- World!
- Disney World!
518
00:19:43,068 --> 00:19:44,188
519
00:19:44,213 --> 00:19:46,647
Hey, guys, we're going to Disney World!
520
00:19:46,715 --> 00:19:49,149
Store.
521
00:19:49,218 --> 00:19:51,618
I was going to say,
"Take you to the Disney Store."
522
00:19:51,687 --> 00:19:54,214
I know. But you saw her face.
What was I supposed to do?
523
00:19:54,239 --> 00:19:56,309
I don't know.
Maybe let me finish my sentence?
524
00:19:56,374 --> 00:19:57,942
We can't afford to go to Disney World.
525
00:19:57,999 --> 00:19:59,770
Now we have to disappoint her
all over again.
526
00:20:02,965 --> 00:20:04,998
Honey, we're not going to Disney World.
527
00:20:05,067 --> 00:20:07,100
It's closed.
528
00:20:07,169 --> 00:20:10,771
Mr. Toad... evidently...
529
00:20:10,839 --> 00:20:12,739
went wild, and...
530
00:20:12,808 --> 00:20:14,441
- Oh.
- Yeah.
531
00:20:14,510 --> 00:20:16,243
I am so sorry.
532
00:20:16,312 --> 00:20:17,674
How about we take you to see...
533
00:20:17,729 --> 00:20:21,548
- World!
- Oh, my God! SeaWorld!
534
00:20:21,617 --> 00:20:24,351
Hey, guys, we're going to SeaWorld!
535
00:20:24,420 --> 00:20:26,153
I was gonna say,
"Take you to see a movie."
536
00:20:26,221 --> 00:20:28,221
This is why I'm her favorite parent.
537
00:20:28,246 --> 00:20:29,812
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
538
00:20:29,862 --> 00:20:34,412
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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