All language subtitles for King of the Hill s13e23 Just Another Manic Kahn-Day.eng

Ripped By mstoll

Bah!

You're only gonna be
gone a few weeks.

Why'd you pack the whole house?

When you go to Laos, you have
to be prepared for anything.

Fancy dinner party,
fishing on the Yangtow River,

surprise lengthy hospital stay.

Besides, I couldn't decide
what sandals to bring.

You're in for one
leech-infested vacation, lady.

Closed-toe all the way.

Kahn, while we're gone,

there's going to be a lot to do.

You have to remember

to turn off the sprinklers
every day at 6:00 p.m.,

pay the gas bill online, and
refill your prescription.

Fine, okay.

Stop talking and leave already.

I can't wait
to make my underwear

my only-wear.

Hello, Minh.

Are you off on your big trip?

Uh, I have a favor to ask.

Kahn will be home alone
for the first time in years.

Maybe Hank could check on him?

Make sure he's all right.

Don't you worry, Minh.

I will have Hank check on Kahn.

I know how hard it is
for Kahn to make friends.

That's not what I said.

Well, it's what you meant.

Hurry up and get in cab

before redneck neighbors
steal your luggage

and take it to pawn shop.

HANK:
All right, everyone.

Grillstravaganza
is in two weeks.

Now, as you know, this
is the only time of year

I ask you to take
your job seriously.

Last year,
Thatherton cooked our chestnuts

like a Parisian gypsy.

(laughing)

We got to outsell Thatherton
this year, people.

Ideas?

How about we wrap a guy
in raw meat

and put him on the grill?

Just for a little while.

How about we give away a monkey?

A monkey with a hat.

Well, we're not doing
a bikini car wash

'cause I'm the only one
that ends up in a bikini.

Oh, all right, I'll do it.

Okay, we got the entertainment
taken care of. Good.

Now, who's on promotions?

Uh, no offense,
Mr. Strickland,

but what does any of that have
to do with selling grills?

Once again you have attempted
to cut through the crap.

Now, let's see
if you can actually do it.

But if you can't,
we're doing it my way,

and the crap wins.

I will give my all for you

and propane.

And to keep Donna's clothes on.

BOBBY: One of these boxes

has all of my old
Halloween costumes in it.

Hold on a second.

What have we here?

Your dad used to like music?

Dude, the computer this
goes in must be huge.

Comedy?

Joseph,

to the turntable.

As usual, Grillstravaganza
is all on my shoulders.

And my shoulders
are drawing a blank.

Why don't you change
the name to Grill?

It's the stravaganza
part that's killing you.

You guys want to head over

to Mega Lo Mart with me?

Maybe I'll get some ideas.

I hear keys jingling.

I bet you're going
somewhere fun.

(gasps) Why don't you
take Kahn with you?

(laughs)

Good one.

Uh, what?

Why would I invite Kahn?

Because I told Minh
you would spend time with him

while she's out of town.

And when I say no, Minh pretends
she doesn't speak English.

(sighs)
All right, fine.

I'll ask Kahn.

Come on, guys.

Welp, I'm out.

I'm dang ol' not gonna
make it after all, man.

No hablo ingles, Hank.

My dad never laughs at anything,

so this has got to be good.

MAN:
Hey, Johnson!

JOHNSON:
Oh, you doesn't have to call me Johnson.

My name is
Raymond J. Johnson Jr.

Now, you can call me Ray
or you can call me Jay

or you can call me R.J.

or you can call me R.J.J.

or you can call me R.J.J. Jr.,

but you doesn't have
to call me Johnson.

(loud crowd laughter)

I don't get it.

What are they laughing at?

And who's he talking to?

Is he talking to us?

I'd like to hear more

from the guy
who said, "Hey, Johnson."

Maybe we have to play
it at a faster speed.

(high-pitched,
speeded-up speech)

Better, but still not funny.

Well, the weather's
been nice, huh?

Weather too dry
for my supple skin.

So, uh, you're a
systems analyst, huh?

That must be, uh, interesting.

Yeah, occasionally
I get to consult

for a company
with intelligent leadership,

like Anderson Automotive, GCP,
Vogner, Southwest Paper...

You consulted for Vogner?

The Vogner Grills?

Oh, Vogner make
a quality product.

No one designs a better
flanged hood and side firebox

for that special flavor
rednecks like.

Now, this may sound weird,
but can you just talk?

I want to listen to this.

You know what I always wonder?

Why no company has ever
souped up a grill--

Made it a total
entertainment centerpiece.

I have been saying that
for years.

Think of all the peripheral
devices you could add:

a minibar, a knife sharpener.

Yeah, flat-screen TV,
face mister.

Buck Strickland wanted
something exciting

for the Grillstravaganza.

Kahn, I want to
build that grill.

Will you help me?

I will, Hank Hill.

I must.

We call it
The Commander-in-Beef.

It's the Swiss Army knife
of grills,

but made by a country

that's not afraid
to fight a war.

Welcome to Strickland Propane.

Well, what do you say
we get started, partner?

Check it out, Hank.

Miter saw.

Perfect for cutting
bread. And look.

We could add a snow cone
machine for the kids.

Kahn, we stand
at the threshold of greatness.

Oh, I got to go pick up
a prescription.

I'll catch up with you
at the corn dog cart.

Uh-oh, she's dealing
with an argumentative senior.

I don't want it in a pill.

I want it in an ointment.

Oh, we'll be here all day.

Maybe I don't need the medicine.

I'm not sick.

Minh only makes me take
them to even out my moods.

Listen, if you're not sick,
don't worry about it.

Wives have turned us
into pill-popping,

baby-wearing,
teeth-whitening sissies.

Yeah, you right.

I think I'll
self-medicate

with 50,000 BTUs of
ass-kicking hellfire.

Mom, I found this comedy
album in the closet.

Oh, Ray J. Johnson Jr.

"You can call me this
and you can..."

(laughs)

He's the man
who taught America to laugh.

Well, if there was a Mr. 1976,
it was certainly him.

He's the one who got us
through the second gas crisis.

Well, did it come with a
booklet that you follow along?

'Cause what's here is not funny.

You're wrong.

It is funny,
and let me tell you why.

You can't explain comedy.

Oh, hey, Kahn.

Wow, you sure got
an early start here.

I stayed up all night and
worked out every last detail.

Entire project is designed
and diagrammed in my head.

Well, just point me where I need
to be and put a tool in my hand.

Welder.

Over there.

Boy, I'm telling you,
it's like somebody took Kahn

and replaced him
with an actual human being.

You're talking about Kahn?

Our neighbor Kahn?

Yes, he is a completely
different person,

and in one day,
my liking of him went up

from not very much to somewhat.

Tell you what, man, talkin' 'bout one
dang ol' day ain't gonna make up

for dang ol' seven dan-
dang ol' years, man.

Well, maybe we never took
the time to get to know him.

He's so outgoing and funny
and has such energy and passion.

So how are his hands?

When you're walking
down the street holding hands,

are they soft?

Enough talking.

I want to meet the new Kahn.

? Dancing with myself ?

? Oh, oh, dancing with myself ?

? Well, there's nothing to lose
and there's nothing to prove ?

? And I'm dancing with myself ?

? Oh, oh, oh... ?

Hank, you said
Kahn had energy, but wow.

He's accomplished more in ten
seconds than I have in a year.

Hello, neighbors,
watch your step,

but as always,
it's good to see you,

and I just baked
delicious cookies

that should be cooled off
in 35 seconds.

Kahn, that self-
portrait is beautiful.

Oh, last night I took
painting class on Internet

and it teach the importance
of color and depth.

And hey, who wants
piping hot delicious cookies?

(oven bell dings)

? Dancing with myself... ?

Is this our grill?

Our new grill.

Yeah, yeah,
new ideas hit me all the time.

It now has every accoutrement

a tailgating football junkie
could ever desire.

Say, did you know Hank
is an anagram for Kahn?

H-A-N-K, K-A-H-N.

Looks like we destined
to be best friends, right?

(grunting)

Wow, uh, you know, this grill--
It, it looks pretty elaborate.

We only have a week.

We can finish it no problem

'cause I compute the amount
of work it will take

and the amount of time
we have before the sale

and I concluded that
we will finish it

with five hours, three minutes,

and eight seconds to spare.

Yeah, that sounds right to me.

(humming frantically)

That's some nice humming
there, Kahn,

but I really need you to focus.

Who you think tastes better
deep-fried-- Gribble?

No, Dauterive.

He'd be so delicious.

We seal in all his juices...

You know, I think it would be
easier to work with you

if I had another beer.

Hey, ol' top.

I just thought I'd check in
on my two favorite laborers.

Hot damn,

that's a fine-
looking grill.

You think this handsome guy do
anything less than perfect?

But you know...

it's coming to me.

Stay with me
'cause it's going to kick you

in the hillbilly ass.

Automated flavor sensors
here and here,

remote control operated trays,

and mechanical arms
on either side,

like a giant grill robot.

BOTH:
Robot?

How the heck are we going
to pull that off?

It's crazy easy.

We attach a couple motherboards,
some microprocessors,

a few transistors...
Love it.

Don't understand it,
but I love it.

Get to work.

Thatherton and I made a bet
Yakuza-style.

I could lose a pinky.

MAN (over speaker):
Hey, Johnson.

JOHNSON: Oh, you doesn't
have to call me Johnson.

My name is Raymond J. Johnson Jr.
(all laughing)

Okay, see, you're laughing,
but I don't know why.

Because you doesn't have
to call him Johnson.

(laughs)
Hey, man, look, you see,

he get-gets annoyed
because a man--

The man only got his
dang ol' name, man, so call--

You can call him Johnny,
don't have to call him Sonny,

dang ol', dang,
dang ol' Junie, too, man.

And then what?

What more would you need?

(all laughing)

Oh...

(alarm beeping)

Kahn's not here?

We also noticed
and discussed it at length.

Dang it, he promised Strickland

some kind of
robot super-grill,

and I can't get him to focus.

That Kahn's a ball of energy.

Last night we popped some corn

and solved
the JFK assassination.

And Lincoln.

We're halfway through McKinley.

The other night

he ghost-wrote
my autobiography.

I came out great.

I don't understand
what's gotten into Kahn.

Only thing I can see that's
changed is that Minh left

and he went off his medication.

Interesting.

Did he say
what the medicine was for?

I don't know; he just said
that Minh made him take 'em

to even out his moods
or something like that.

Did he say that--
"even out his moods"?

That's what they usually say

about people
with manic depression.

Uh, maybe we ought
to check on him.

Kahn?

Sadness covers me
like a blanket.

Tuck me in. Let me die.

(gasps)

Uh, maybe he's just sad.

Nope.

He's been swallowed whole
by soul-sucking depression.

Yep.

He reminds me of me when
I was just starting out.

You've got a long way to go.

I'm... just not... ever... good.

Hey, Kahn, if you're depressed,

maybe we could go out
for some ice cream

or watch a funny movie.

What if you gave him one
of coach's pep talks, Hank?

Now, that's a great idea.

Why don't you go
into the girls' locker room

and put on a skirt, Wendy?

Oh, what, you don't like that?

Oh, you gonna cry, huh?

(whimpering)

Uh, I guess you are,
uh, going to cry.

All right, we're going to
have to fix this somehow.

I'll confiscate his shoelaces

and the drawstring
from his pants.

People forget the drawstring.

We should try to get
his prescription filled.

So, uh, Kahn, I was thinking

maybe you could throw on
some pants

and come
to the pharmacy with me.

There's no use in going.

I threw prescription away.

Don't even know doctor's name.

(groans)

You know what I just realized?

I'll never hear
another Huey Lewis song

for the first time again.

Man, I don't know what's
gonna be harder, man.

Fixing dang ol' Kahn or fixing
your dang ol' grill, man.

(sighs)

Grillstravaganza is in four days

and I can't make sense
of Kahn's plans.

I don't know anything
about computers

and his writing
is microscopic...

and in Laotian.

(sighing): This is like figuring out
a jigsaw puzzle made of clouds.

I just wish this was a movie.

Some music would play

and we would just cut
to when we were all finished.

Well, I've done it.

I've glued a toaster
to a karaoke machine.

Is that something
I was supposed to do, Hank?

This is useless.

We can't finish this
without Kahn,

and Kahn can't finish this
without his medication.

We could just get him the drugs
illegally from Mexico.

They're the exact same medicine,
only cheaper.

And spicier.

Let's do it.

BRITISH FEMALE VOICE:
Pardon me, Johnson.

JOHNSON:
You can call me Ray

or you can call me Jay

or you can call me Ray J.

Or you can call me R.J.

or you can call me R.J.J.,

but you doesn't have
to call me Johnson.

PEGGY:
Bobby, dinner!

In a minute!

I'm not coming out
until I crack this.

MAN:
Yo, Johnson!

JOHNSON:
You can call me Ray

or you can call me Jay

or you can call me Ray J.

Or you can call me R.J.

or you can call me R.J.J.
(laughs)

But you doesn't have
to call me Johnson.

(laughing): You doesn't
have to call him Johnson.

Johnson got another one.

(laughing continues)

(Spanish hip-hop playing
distantly)

I wonder how many pills
Kahn should take.

Maybe, to be on the safe side,

he should take them all.

Oh, man, just, it dang
ol' happened, man.

One minute, he's on couch.
He's all whimpering, whining,

Next minute ol' up
and at 'em, man.

Hank Hill,
about time you got here

'cause I need a 5/16th-inch
drill bit right now, 5/16th.

See, it's a good thing
I'm off my medication.

Now I have lots of energy.

Let's get to work.

Oh, can you help me
move my couch, too?

Actually, Kahn, we were
able to get your med...

Glad to see
you're feeling better, Kahn.

No use in wasting
this good mood, huh?

I'll grab that drill bit.

Peggy, I'm gonna be working
late tonight on the grill.

So, I found a bottle of pills.

It gets better.

They are unlabeled pills.

It gets better.

They are from an unlicensed
Mexican pharmacy.

You have one sentence
to explain.

Uh, well, that's what happens

when you let Boomhauer
borrow your pants.

(pills rattling)

I accidentally made Kahn

go off his medication
for manic depression,

so I had to get more of it...

from Mexico.

So why are the pills
in your pants

and not in Kahn?

Well, if he goes back
on his medication,

it'll even him out and we'll
never finish the grill.

Grillstravaganza
is riding on this.

Hank Hill, you cannot
withhold Kahn's medication

for some stupid grill!

Come on, Peggy.

Look at him out there,
all full of energy.

It's not hurting anyone.

(sobbing)

(laughing manically)

(cheering)

Huh.

(sighs)

All right, fine.

I'll give him his pills.

Kahn, you have to stop building.

Can't stop now.

The Commander-in-Beef
is almost finished.

Big sale starts tomorrow.

You have to take
your medication.

But I don't want it.

I feel great.

And when I'm off my meds,
I have so much pep.

We're all friends.

See?

Friends.

Well, we'll still be friends.

Not taking your medication
is too risky.

You could slip
into another one of your, uh,

depressive states.

Your health is more important
than the grill.

I guess I see that now.

Aw, Hank Hill,
you care about me.

Well, go on now.

Take 'em so you can get
back to normal.

It's not immediate, Hank.

It's gonna take a day or so
for the pills to work.

Really?

So what happens until then?

I could be manic.
I could be depressed.

Real crapshoot.

Huh.

The suspense is killing me.

Yeah, Kahn's been lying down
for over an hour.

What do you think that means?

Which way is he gonna go?

Oh, man, like a dang ol'
Billy Joel, man,

like a dang ol' sadness
or euphoria, man.

It's manic!

Hey, check this out.

Oh, cool.

(hooting)

Hot damn, Hank!

We just sold more grills than in
the last three years combined.

Whoo! We dry-rubbed it
in Thatherton's face!

Yes, sir, I believe we did.

(engine revving)

(tires screeching)

(grunts)

Hey, there, Kahn.

You're looking well.

You know, balanced.

Yeah.

I just came by to see
the grill in action.

Looks good.
Good?

She's a got-dang
masterpiece, Kahn.

It even knew I was hungry.

I know this grill
almost destroyed

your fragile grasp
on sanity, but...

that is a damn fine burger.

Yeah, all in all, I have
to say it was worth it.

You can taste the pain.

JOHNSON: But you doesn't
have to call me Johnson.

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