Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,985 --> 00:00:04,613
Merry Christmas, gentlemen.
2
00:00:04,905 --> 00:00:07,116
So, Hank, what's
with the black suit?
3
00:00:07,199 --> 00:00:08,534
Someone die?
4
00:00:08,659 --> 00:00:09,827
[CHUCKLES]
5
00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:13,122
Oh, right, someone did die.
6
00:00:13,205 --> 00:00:17,042
Your, uh, Mom's best friend
as I recall.
7
00:00:18,710 --> 00:00:20,712
Well, this is awkward.
8
00:00:22,798 --> 00:00:24,925
Merry Christmas?
9
00:01:02,296 --> 00:01:04,214
That was Lottie Bonner's lawyer.
10
00:01:04,339 --> 00:01:07,718
Lottie left me all her
lovely antique furniture.
11
00:01:07,926 --> 00:01:09,261
I'm so touched.
12
00:01:09,386 --> 00:01:11,597
I don't know whether
to laugh or cry.
13
00:01:11,763 --> 00:01:15,309
Uh, so your best bet
is, you know, neither.
14
00:01:15,517 --> 00:01:17,561
Oh, of course,
I'll never be able
15
00:01:17,644 --> 00:01:19,646
to get it back to Arizona.
16
00:01:19,771 --> 00:01:20,939
Well, heck, Mom,
17
00:01:21,023 --> 00:01:23,317
I can move that stuff
out to Arizona for you easy.
18
00:01:23,442 --> 00:01:24,526
Oh, but...
19
00:01:24,610 --> 00:01:26,945
I will be at your door
by Christmas Eve.
20
00:01:27,029 --> 00:01:29,615
Heck, all I have to do
is rent a moving van.
21
00:01:29,781 --> 00:01:33,493
Oh, Hank, are you sure
a van is big enough?
22
00:01:57,100 --> 00:01:58,894
That is a big van.
23
00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:01,563
- DALE: Holy crap!
- BILL: Oh, boy, oh boy.
24
00:02:01,688 --> 00:02:03,941
BOOMHAUER: Look at
the size of that ol' rig, man.
25
00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:10,172
I'm going to name her
Wondertruck.
26
00:02:10,405 --> 00:02:11,573
BILL:
Ask him. Ask him.
27
00:02:11,657 --> 00:02:14,076
Hank, we want to ask
you one question.
28
00:02:14,159 --> 00:02:16,703
You can't come with me
on the trip.
29
00:02:16,828 --> 00:02:18,497
I have a follow-up question.
30
00:02:18,580 --> 00:02:20,082
[ALL PLEADING]
31
00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:22,125
Please let us
come on Wondertruck!
32
00:02:22,209 --> 00:02:25,003
The next one who asks to come
won't even get to look at it.
33
00:02:27,089 --> 00:02:28,131
Okay, then.
34
00:02:31,510 --> 00:02:32,511
BILL:
Huh?
35
00:02:32,594 --> 00:02:35,097
I know it's more cargo
space than I need,
36
00:02:35,180 --> 00:02:37,224
but, uh, well,
there's a sleeper cab
37
00:02:37,307 --> 00:02:39,101
so I'll save on motels
38
00:02:39,268 --> 00:02:41,061
and, you know, uh...
39
00:02:41,144 --> 00:02:42,396
[CLEARS THROAT]
40
00:02:42,479 --> 00:02:44,898
Hank, you don't have
to explain to us.
41
00:02:46,608 --> 00:02:48,443
Wow...
42
00:02:52,698 --> 00:02:54,825
Look at all this cool stuff!
43
00:02:54,992 --> 00:02:56,743
This isn't a toy, Bobby.
44
00:02:56,827 --> 00:02:58,912
To a trucker, these are tools.
45
00:02:59,037 --> 00:03:01,373
See, truckers
are the last cowboys.
46
00:03:01,498 --> 00:03:04,167
They're their own bosses
making tough decisions,
47
00:03:04,251 --> 00:03:06,420
winning or losing
by the calls they make,
48
00:03:06,503 --> 00:03:08,964
answering only to the road.
49
00:03:09,131 --> 00:03:10,257
Sounds hard.
50
00:03:10,340 --> 00:03:11,258
It is.
51
00:03:11,383 --> 00:03:12,718
Now, how would you like
52
00:03:12,801 --> 00:03:14,469
to make this trip
with your old man?
53
00:03:14,678 --> 00:03:16,096
Heck, yeah!
54
00:03:16,179 --> 00:03:20,225
Dad, can I have permission
to say "Hell, yeah"?
55
00:03:20,392 --> 00:03:21,893
Just a moment.
56
00:03:25,856 --> 00:03:28,275
DALE:
It's such a fine night
57
00:03:28,442 --> 00:03:31,611
to, uh, look at the, uh, moon.
58
00:03:31,820 --> 00:03:34,072
BILL: Look how big and
powerful the moon looks
59
00:03:34,156 --> 00:03:35,449
in the moonlight.
60
00:03:35,532 --> 00:03:37,868
Ready for its trip to Arizona.
61
00:03:38,035 --> 00:03:39,786
It's just not fair!
62
00:03:39,870 --> 00:03:41,455
The moon, I mean.
63
00:03:41,538 --> 00:03:43,665
- [SIGHS]
- Oh...
64
00:03:47,002 --> 00:03:49,171
This is a dream come true.
65
00:03:49,296 --> 00:03:51,506
A trucker and his boy
alone with their rig
66
00:03:51,631 --> 00:03:53,300
on the open road.
67
00:03:53,467 --> 00:03:54,426
But don't worry, Peggy.
68
00:03:54,509 --> 00:03:56,303
We'll do a quick turnaround
and be back home
69
00:03:56,386 --> 00:03:57,763
by Christmas morning sharp.
70
00:03:59,139 --> 00:04:01,475
A trucker and his boy.
71
00:04:01,558 --> 00:04:05,354
And they've promised their mom
to be home by Christmas.
72
00:04:05,645 --> 00:04:09,066
Hank, this is one of those
novelty Christmas songs
73
00:04:09,149 --> 00:04:11,568
that always sells a
million freaking copies!
74
00:04:11,693 --> 00:04:14,279
I have always wanted
to get in on that racket!
75
00:04:14,363 --> 00:04:16,365
Okay, let's roll.
76
00:04:16,531 --> 00:04:17,574
Well, all right.
77
00:04:17,657 --> 00:04:19,451
Okay, Bobby, we got
to stay on time,
78
00:04:19,534 --> 00:04:21,495
so drink up
and let's hit the road.
79
00:04:21,578 --> 00:04:24,039
Coffee? For me?
80
00:04:26,249 --> 00:04:27,709
Mmm...
81
00:04:30,629 --> 00:04:33,799
I don't think I can ever
go back to cocoa!
82
00:04:33,965 --> 00:04:36,259
See, trucking is like
a lot of things in life.
83
00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:38,178
Know your rig inside out.
84
00:04:38,220 --> 00:04:40,722
Take care of your rig
and she'll take care of you.
85
00:04:40,889 --> 00:04:44,184
Dad, you know everything.
86
00:04:44,393 --> 00:04:47,229
Well, I do have
a Class "C" license.
87
00:04:48,313 --> 00:04:50,148
[BILL LAUGHS]
88
00:04:50,315 --> 00:04:51,900
? We're stowing away ?
89
00:04:52,109 --> 00:04:53,985
? We're stowing away ?
90
00:04:54,069 --> 00:04:55,487
[GIGGLES]
91
00:04:55,570 --> 00:04:57,364
We're so bad.
92
00:04:58,407 --> 00:04:59,741
Ooh-ee, man!
Look at that, man!
93
00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:02,327
Just like a God dang ol'
Ben Hur, man.
94
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:05,831
DALE:
Oh, wingo!
95
00:05:07,290 --> 00:05:09,167
Boy, look at that view.
96
00:05:09,334 --> 00:05:12,379
This is probably how it looked
to the very first truckers.
97
00:05:12,587 --> 00:05:14,631
Now, the trick to
heading up a steep grade
98
00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:16,332
is to shift gears carefully.
99
00:05:16,416 --> 00:05:17,509
And why is that?
100
00:05:17,676 --> 00:05:20,804
BOBBY: "A trucker
always protects his cargo."
101
00:05:22,556 --> 00:05:24,391
My dearest Nancy,
102
00:05:24,474 --> 00:05:28,353
I have many questions
about the outside world.
103
00:05:28,520 --> 00:05:30,647
Is our government still intact?
104
00:05:30,730 --> 00:05:32,941
And what of young Joseph?
105
00:05:36,611 --> 00:05:38,822
Gentlemen, to your racers.
106
00:05:44,035 --> 00:05:45,704
- DALE: Cheaters!
- Yay!
107
00:05:45,871 --> 00:05:47,747
He wins!
Oh, no!
108
00:05:49,332 --> 00:05:52,586
? Hank and Bobby
In a Christmas truck ?
109
00:05:52,669 --> 00:05:54,004
Oh, dang it!
110
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:56,715
There's just no good words
that rhyme with truck.
111
00:05:56,882 --> 00:06:02,053
Aunt Peggy, could they
be delivering a-a snowman?
112
00:06:02,179 --> 00:06:05,223
I bet there's lots of words
that rhyme with snowman.
113
00:06:05,307 --> 00:06:06,475
Of course.
114
00:06:06,558 --> 00:06:10,187
Who needs a snowman
more than a widow in Arizona?
115
00:06:10,270 --> 00:06:12,731
Our song will be about
Hank and Bobby
116
00:06:12,814 --> 00:06:17,986
delivering a snowman
to a woman with no man.
117
00:06:18,054 --> 00:06:19,955
[BOTH LAUGH]
118
00:06:20,071 --> 00:06:22,240
I'm a songwriter!
119
00:06:24,826 --> 00:06:28,038
BOBBY: The second-largest
thermometer in the U.S.
120
00:06:28,246 --> 00:06:29,664
Do we have time to stop?
121
00:06:29,748 --> 00:06:31,750
Well, we have to be home
by Christmas,
122
00:06:31,833 --> 00:06:34,169
so we can stop or we
can go to a truckstop
123
00:06:34,252 --> 00:06:36,213
and chow down like
real truckers.
124
00:06:36,296 --> 00:06:38,548
Chow down like real truckers!
125
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:39,925
Well, all right, then.
126
00:06:40,050 --> 00:06:43,094
Eh, you can see the
thermometer from here anyway.
127
00:06:43,345 --> 00:06:46,556
"105 degrees." Wow.
128
00:06:50,185 --> 00:06:54,105
DALE: Hank,
for God's sakes, let us out!
129
00:06:54,314 --> 00:06:56,525
It's so hot!
130
00:06:56,691 --> 00:07:00,695
No, Hank hears us, but
he's choosing to punish us.
131
00:07:00,779 --> 00:07:01,988
Rightly so.
132
00:07:02,072 --> 00:07:03,365
What's the use?
133
00:07:03,448 --> 00:07:04,950
At the rate I'm smoking,
134
00:07:05,033 --> 00:07:08,286
we only have about 30 minutes
of oxygen left anyway.
135
00:07:08,495 --> 00:07:11,748
Oh, man, dang ol'...
Dang, dang, dang, man!
136
00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:13,458
I need a dang ol' water, man.
137
00:07:13,625 --> 00:07:14,876
We brought food.
138
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:17,963
Maybe we can squeeze
moisture out of it.
139
00:07:18,046 --> 00:07:19,172
Let's see.
140
00:07:19,339 --> 00:07:21,716
Chips, barbecue chips,
141
00:07:21,883 --> 00:07:24,636
vinegar flavor, hot and spicy.
142
00:07:24,844 --> 00:07:27,055
Saltines! No!!
143
00:07:27,138 --> 00:07:28,807
[SOBBING]
144
00:07:37,107 --> 00:07:38,316
Wow!
145
00:07:38,400 --> 00:07:40,193
I didn't want
to describe it to you,
146
00:07:40,277 --> 00:07:43,029
because, well, how could I?
147
00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:45,740
See, for truckers,
time is money.
148
00:07:45,865 --> 00:07:49,035
We can't spend time waiting
in a line with the civilians.
149
00:07:49,244 --> 00:07:50,787
We keep to a schedule.
150
00:07:56,251 --> 00:07:59,129
Yup, I just rode in from
Arlen, Texas, on a straight shot.
151
00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:00,338
How about you?
152
00:08:00,505 --> 00:08:02,048
Well, I guess I'm coming in
153
00:08:02,132 --> 00:08:04,426
straight from,
oh, Eastern Long Island.
154
00:08:04,509 --> 00:08:07,053
Guess this'd be my first meal
in 40 hours or so.
155
00:08:07,178 --> 00:08:08,763
Yep, I hear that.
156
00:08:08,847 --> 00:08:09,916
Okay.
157
00:08:10,056 --> 00:08:11,683
So what're you boys
hauling, anyway?
158
00:08:11,891 --> 00:08:13,977
A sofa for my Grandma!
159
00:08:14,144 --> 00:08:15,770
[SNICKERING]
160
00:08:15,895 --> 00:08:18,315
Sir, this section
is for truckers only.
161
00:08:18,481 --> 00:08:21,735
Buffs like you, takin' up space,
costs real truckers money.
162
00:08:21,776 --> 00:08:22,819
Go on.
163
00:08:23,028 --> 00:08:26,448
But, Dad, I thought you
said we were truckers.
164
00:08:26,656 --> 00:08:27,532
We are.
165
00:08:27,616 --> 00:08:29,242
I don't mean to spoil
your fun, sir,
166
00:08:29,326 --> 00:08:30,660
but you're not a trucker.
167
00:08:30,785 --> 00:08:32,370
You're just a guy with a truck.
168
00:08:32,537 --> 00:08:33,747
You think I'm not a trucker?
169
00:08:33,830 --> 00:08:35,999
Well, I drove through El Paso
in rush hour
170
00:08:36,082 --> 00:08:37,792
and didn't grind a gear.
171
00:08:37,959 --> 00:08:39,210
Look at my rig --
172
00:08:39,377 --> 00:08:41,963
perfectly maintained from
the back bumper to the grille.
173
00:08:42,422 --> 00:08:43,632
[GUNSHOTS]
174
00:08:54,017 --> 00:08:55,602
DALE:
Hank!
175
00:08:55,727 --> 00:08:58,063
Oh, hey, Hank.
176
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,568
We're not gonna drink Bill
after all, okay?
177
00:09:03,652 --> 00:09:05,737
Waiter, table for five.
178
00:09:08,615 --> 00:09:10,659
Look out, hot load!
179
00:09:15,538 --> 00:09:17,123
BILL:
We're sorry, Hank.
180
00:09:17,290 --> 00:09:18,875
We'll sit quietly back here,
181
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:21,169
if you give us
a water-dish to drink from.
182
00:09:21,336 --> 00:09:23,713
We'll be as quiet as truck-mice.
183
00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:24,881
Get in the cab.
184
00:09:25,006 --> 00:09:27,592
Fixing this hole you made
has put me off schedule.
185
00:09:27,717 --> 00:09:30,136
So, I'll skip my bunk time
and drive all night.
186
00:09:30,220 --> 00:09:32,055
Now get moving.
187
00:09:33,223 --> 00:09:36,267
This is the saga
our song will tell:
188
00:09:36,685 --> 00:09:38,728
Hank and Bobby find a snowman
189
00:09:38,895 --> 00:09:40,605
hitch-hiking through Arizona.
190
00:09:40,689 --> 00:09:42,232
He will melt to death
191
00:09:42,315 --> 00:09:44,526
unless he gets home
to the North Pole by Christmas.
192
00:09:44,651 --> 00:09:46,653
Hank and Bobby take him home.
193
00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:48,863
The snowman's family
is so grateful,
194
00:09:49,030 --> 00:09:52,409
they invite him to their
Christmas Snowman dinner.
195
00:09:52,492 --> 00:09:53,618
You got it?
196
00:09:53,702 --> 00:09:55,453
Oh, no.
197
00:09:55,704 --> 00:09:58,123
BOBBY:
It's okay to take a nap, Dad.
198
00:09:58,289 --> 00:10:00,834
If we're half a day late,
Grandma won't mind.
199
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:02,043
Well, I will.
200
00:10:02,127 --> 00:10:04,170
We've got a promise
to your mother to keep.
201
00:10:04,295 --> 00:10:06,673
We are getting back home
by Christmas morning.
202
00:10:06,756 --> 00:10:07,716
Duck...
203
00:10:07,924 --> 00:10:09,008
Duck...
204
00:10:09,050 --> 00:10:10,093
Goose!
205
00:10:10,176 --> 00:10:11,052
What?
206
00:10:11,219 --> 00:10:12,637
I'll get him, Hank.
207
00:10:12,804 --> 00:10:14,139
[SCREAMING]
208
00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:15,056
Dang it!
209
00:10:15,223 --> 00:10:16,015
Shush it!
210
00:10:24,649 --> 00:10:27,110
PEGGY AND LUANNE:
? And that's how the Christmas ?
211
00:10:27,277 --> 00:10:34,409
? Snowman got back home! ?
212
00:10:36,453 --> 00:10:37,871
You don't like it.
213
00:10:38,079 --> 00:10:39,831
Oh, it's not that, sug's.
214
00:10:39,914 --> 00:10:42,500
It's just that I've got a lot
of other things on my mind.
215
00:10:42,584 --> 00:10:44,961
Like, I don't know
where my husband is.
216
00:10:45,128 --> 00:10:46,421
Oh, I'm sure Dale is fine.
217
00:10:46,504 --> 00:10:48,047
Now, how can we fix the song?
218
00:10:48,131 --> 00:10:49,924
We tried your way, Aunt Peggy.
219
00:10:50,008 --> 00:10:51,760
Now we should do it my way!
220
00:10:51,843 --> 00:10:53,595
We have differences.
221
00:10:53,678 --> 00:10:56,681
Like when Simon
versus the Garfunkel.
222
00:10:56,848 --> 00:10:59,768
Look how straight the lines
on the highway are.
223
00:10:59,976 --> 00:11:03,480
It'd be easy
to get highway hypnosis.
224
00:11:04,773 --> 00:11:08,568
Bill... you are
getting sleepy...
225
00:11:08,651 --> 00:11:10,236
It's working.
226
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:12,822
I'm so sleepy.
227
00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:15,595
M-M-Make him think
he's a dang ol' chicken, man.
228
00:11:16,868 --> 00:11:18,077
Hey, Dad!
Ahh...
229
00:11:18,161 --> 00:11:19,120
Look!
230
00:11:19,204 --> 00:11:20,538
I-I-I was awake! What?!
231
00:11:20,663 --> 00:11:21,748
Look at the sign!
232
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:23,500
"Truckstop 4 Miles."
233
00:11:23,583 --> 00:11:25,627
We can get you some coffee.
234
00:11:28,171 --> 00:11:30,089
Bobby, it would take
too long to tie 'em up
235
00:11:30,173 --> 00:11:31,966
so I'm going to need
you to get the coffee.
236
00:11:32,133 --> 00:11:33,551
Which line? Trucker or...
237
00:11:33,718 --> 00:11:34,928
Trucker.
238
00:11:35,553 --> 00:11:37,680
Dad, they wouldn't let me
on the trucker line
239
00:11:37,806 --> 00:11:39,140
for moral reasons, but--
240
00:11:39,265 --> 00:11:40,558
[SNORING]
241
00:11:42,101 --> 00:11:44,521
Guess playing trucker
takes a lot out of you.
242
00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:46,898
Least now he can tell
all the other accountants
243
00:11:46,981 --> 00:11:49,442
he slept at a real truckstop.
244
00:11:49,651 --> 00:11:51,486
[LAUGHTER]
245
00:11:54,614 --> 00:11:55,740
BOBBY:
Okay.
246
00:11:55,865 --> 00:11:57,325
Let's get a move out.
247
00:11:57,408 --> 00:12:00,620
Now, if make up for the lost
time while my dad's asleep,
248
00:12:00,703 --> 00:12:02,789
he'll wake up ahead of schedule.
249
00:12:02,872 --> 00:12:06,584
Mr. Boomhauer, are you sure
you're able to handle this vehicle?
250
00:12:06,751 --> 00:12:08,545
Dang ol' piece of cake, man.
251
00:12:08,711 --> 00:12:11,047
Just like riding a dang ol'
riding mower or forklift.
252
00:12:11,256 --> 00:12:13,842
You know, just like a dang ol'
lion the same as kitty cat, man.
253
00:12:18,388 --> 00:12:20,849
DALE:
14-foot clearance.
254
00:12:21,057 --> 00:12:23,476
Ha! How tall is the truck?
255
00:12:23,601 --> 00:12:24,644
Probably...
256
00:12:24,788 --> 00:12:27,105
- I don't know. Bobby?
- I don't know!
257
00:12:27,188 --> 00:12:29,983
It's awfully big.
I'd say 30 feet tall, at least.
258
00:12:32,284 --> 00:12:33,910
Boomhauer, get off now!
259
00:12:34,070 --> 00:12:35,488
BOBBY:
There's an exit!
260
00:12:38,241 --> 00:12:39,951
DALE:
This is the wrong way!
261
00:12:40,118 --> 00:12:41,160
Turn around!
262
00:12:41,244 --> 00:12:43,288
Hey, do you see the dang
ol' size of this thing, man?
263
00:12:43,413 --> 00:12:45,790
Dang ol' don't talk
about "turn around" man.
264
00:12:45,874 --> 00:12:48,209
Ooh, there's another exit.
Take it!
265
00:12:58,261 --> 00:13:00,513
Well, this feels good,
doesn't it?
266
00:13:12,275 --> 00:13:14,402
Well, Mom, that's
the last of it.
267
00:13:14,611 --> 00:13:18,865
Hank, this is the best
Christmas ever. Ready?
268
00:13:18,990 --> 00:13:21,743
? Oh, say can you see ?
269
00:13:21,868 --> 00:13:24,829
? By the dawn's early light ?
270
00:13:24,996 --> 00:13:30,293
? Dawn's early light
Dawn's early light ?
271
00:13:36,215 --> 00:13:38,718
What the...? Where...?
272
00:13:38,885 --> 00:13:42,013
Hank, we're having trouble
with the engine.
273
00:13:42,096 --> 00:13:43,640
And the clutch.
274
00:13:43,765 --> 00:13:47,352
Oh, and we're on top
of a mountain.
275
00:13:47,477 --> 00:13:50,063
I think it might be
a Rocky Mountain.
276
00:13:50,313 --> 00:13:53,983
[SCREAM ECHOING]
277
00:13:59,155 --> 00:14:00,865
What the hell happened?
278
00:14:01,074 --> 00:14:04,035
Let's just say
mistakes were made.
279
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,413
Then other larger mistakes.
280
00:14:07,538 --> 00:14:09,332
We're not proud of ourselves.
281
00:14:09,457 --> 00:14:10,875
I'm sorry, Dad.
282
00:14:11,042 --> 00:14:12,794
We thought if we kept driving,
283
00:14:12,877 --> 00:14:15,088
we could help you make
your delivery on time.
284
00:14:15,171 --> 00:14:17,465
We didn't even stop
for a potty break.
285
00:14:17,548 --> 00:14:19,509
I had to use your coffee mug.
286
00:14:19,676 --> 00:14:22,887
Dale, get behind
the Line of Shame.
287
00:14:23,638 --> 00:14:26,265
Not you, Bobby.
I know you were trying to help.
288
00:14:27,308 --> 00:14:28,851
Hank, we're cold.
289
00:14:28,935 --> 00:14:30,603
Can we put our hands down?
290
00:14:30,812 --> 00:14:32,772
No. Okay, we're out of fuel.
291
00:14:32,897 --> 00:14:34,649
That part I can understand.
292
00:14:34,857 --> 00:14:37,193
But how did you let
the battery go dead?
293
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:40,697
It was dark and the headlights
made us feel so safe.
294
00:14:40,905 --> 00:14:43,449
Breaker 10-33, this is Top Hat.
295
00:14:43,533 --> 00:14:44,784
Requesting emergency...
296
00:14:44,951 --> 00:14:46,369
No, Bobby.
297
00:14:46,536 --> 00:14:48,204
I don't want to bother
real truckers
298
00:14:48,287 --> 00:14:50,373
with the problems
of a guy who fell asleep
299
00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:53,209
and let his rig wind up
on top of a mountain.
300
00:14:53,292 --> 00:14:54,752
What are you doing, Dad?
301
00:14:54,836 --> 00:14:55,670
[SIGHS]
302
00:14:55,753 --> 00:14:57,338
I'm going to call Triple "A"
303
00:14:57,422 --> 00:14:59,465
and probably hire
some movers, too.
304
00:14:59,549 --> 00:15:01,843
It's time to let
the professionals handle this.
305
00:15:02,010 --> 00:15:03,970
No! Sure we're in a hole,
306
00:15:04,095 --> 00:15:06,431
but real truckers
are in a hole all the time
307
00:15:06,514 --> 00:15:07,807
and they don't give up.
308
00:15:07,974 --> 00:15:10,143
They figure out
a way to get through.
309
00:15:10,351 --> 00:15:13,604
You're not just
a guy with a truck, Dad.
310
00:15:17,734 --> 00:15:21,279
Okay, everybody, let's check out
our rig and see what we've got.
311
00:15:21,404 --> 00:15:23,740
[CHEERING]
312
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:27,243
Uh, line suspended.
313
00:15:28,828 --> 00:15:33,082
...and a Charlie Chaplin ceramic
lamp and these opera glasses.
314
00:15:33,291 --> 00:15:34,834
That's what we have
to work with.
315
00:15:34,959 --> 00:15:37,253
Hank, which would you rather
burn for warmth,
316
00:15:37,336 --> 00:15:38,755
the dining set
317
00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:41,841
or the frames of these
tasteful landscape paintings?
318
00:15:42,050 --> 00:15:45,470
Neither. I am getting
this load to my mom intact.
319
00:15:45,636 --> 00:15:47,889
Hey, man, got them
dang ol' antique lamps, man.
320
00:15:48,014 --> 00:15:50,349
Talk about a little kerosene
left inside, man, you know?
321
00:15:50,475 --> 00:15:52,477
Probably stay warm
dang ol' five minutes or so.
322
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:55,104
Talking about...
[HUMS I DREAM OF JEANIE THEME]
323
00:15:55,271 --> 00:15:56,647
Good idea, Boomhauer.
324
00:15:56,773 --> 00:15:58,191
There might be some kerosene
325
00:15:58,274 --> 00:16:00,610
still left in those lamps
to keep us warm if...
326
00:16:00,693 --> 00:16:01,944
No, wait a minute.
327
00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:03,696
Bobby, hand me
those opera glasses.
328
00:16:11,954 --> 00:16:13,122
Perfect.
329
00:16:13,289 --> 00:16:15,416
Now, if we can get the truck
rolling downhill,
330
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:17,627
the motion will recharge
the battery.
331
00:16:17,752 --> 00:16:19,879
And kerosene is close enough
to diesel fuel
332
00:16:19,962 --> 00:16:21,130
So we can burn it.
333
00:16:21,214 --> 00:16:22,381
I'll pop the clutch,
334
00:16:22,507 --> 00:16:23,925
and we can turn around
in that meadow.
335
00:16:24,092 --> 00:16:26,344
I understood something
about burning fuel.
336
00:16:26,427 --> 00:16:27,762
Are we going to be warm?
337
00:16:27,970 --> 00:16:30,014
You two are going to get warm
working up a sweat
338
00:16:30,098 --> 00:16:32,683
digging out
these tires. Here.
339
00:16:33,017 --> 00:16:35,144
Bobby, I need your
help over here.
340
00:16:35,311 --> 00:16:38,189
And Dale, you're, uh, at large.
341
00:16:38,356 --> 00:16:39,899
Yes, sir!
342
00:16:53,746 --> 00:16:56,582
Now, I won't be able to see
from the back to steer,
343
00:16:56,666 --> 00:16:58,251
so you fellows will have
to guide me.
344
00:16:58,417 --> 00:16:59,836
Boomhauer, use the CB.
345
00:17:00,002 --> 00:17:01,963
It's going to be a bumpy ride,
so hang on.
346
00:17:02,088 --> 00:17:05,133
Hank, what keeps the furniture
from sliding out the door?
347
00:17:05,341 --> 00:17:08,386
Well, all our straps and chains
are on the road for traction.
348
00:17:08,469 --> 00:17:10,179
So, you do, Bill.
349
00:17:10,304 --> 00:17:11,681
Good luck.
350
00:17:17,478 --> 00:17:20,523
Okay, man, Hank, you got, like,
dang ol' little ol' curve
351
00:17:20,606 --> 00:17:21,774
coming up on the left.
352
00:17:21,858 --> 00:17:23,025
Talking about 15 or 20 degrees.
353
00:17:23,093 --> 00:17:24,594
Now swing it a little
to the right now.
354
00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:26,779
Okay, now ease on
to about 3:00, man.
355
00:17:26,904 --> 00:17:28,614
A little bump.
You feel that, man?
356
00:17:28,739 --> 00:17:30,491
Okay, how, now,
come on straight.
357
00:17:30,575 --> 00:17:32,160
Hold steady, man.
Hold steady, man.
358
00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:33,828
Talking about right.
Now cut right.
359
00:17:33,953 --> 00:17:35,371
Dang ol' good job, man.
360
00:17:35,538 --> 00:17:36,873
Talk about just a little
ol' straightaway
361
00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:38,291
about 20, 30 yards now.
362
00:17:38,457 --> 00:17:41,127
Get a little meadow coming up
on the dang ol' left, man.
363
00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:42,670
Get ready, get ready now.
364
00:17:42,753 --> 00:17:44,463
Okay, now cut, man.
Cut, cut.
365
00:17:44,630 --> 00:17:46,340
Give it all you got, man!
366
00:17:46,549 --> 00:17:49,594
Okay, now, Hank, hang in there,
man. Quick left, quick left!
367
00:17:49,677 --> 00:17:51,179
Left, left, man!
368
00:17:52,638 --> 00:17:53,806
BILL:
It's working!
369
00:17:53,973 --> 00:17:55,892
It's working! It's...
370
00:17:56,058 --> 00:17:58,186
[GASPING]
371
00:17:59,395 --> 00:18:00,938
[GRUNTING]
372
00:18:02,565 --> 00:18:04,609
HANK:
We only get one shot, son.
373
00:18:04,692 --> 00:18:05,943
Pull!
374
00:18:06,110 --> 00:18:07,403
[GRUNTING]
375
00:18:13,618 --> 00:18:15,077
[ENGINE STARTS]
376
00:18:15,286 --> 00:18:16,329
- Yes!
- Yeah!
377
00:18:18,539 --> 00:18:21,626
LUANNE: ? Then the snowman thanked
Bobby and Uncle Hank ?
378
00:18:21,709 --> 00:18:24,420
? For taking him to Arizona ?
379
00:18:24,503 --> 00:18:28,549
? 'Cause he wanted to see
His friend, the crippled boy ?
380
00:18:28,633 --> 00:18:35,431
? Just one more time
Before he melted ?
381
00:18:35,514 --> 00:18:37,016
The end.
382
00:18:37,141 --> 00:18:39,310
That's my Christmas
trucking song.
383
00:18:39,393 --> 00:18:40,561
Do you like it?
384
00:18:40,728 --> 00:18:42,647
Sug', it's great,
385
00:18:42,730 --> 00:18:44,565
but right now I'm busy
386
00:18:44,649 --> 00:18:47,944
filing a Missing Persons
report, okay?
387
00:18:48,194 --> 00:18:49,862
Can you see now, Hank?
388
00:18:49,946 --> 00:18:50,613
Ow!
389
00:18:50,780 --> 00:18:52,073
Can you? Ow!
390
00:18:52,156 --> 00:18:53,699
How about now! Ow!
391
00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:55,868
BILL AND DALE:
Ow! Ow!
392
00:19:00,790 --> 00:19:04,961
There I am, 1,500 pounds
over my weight limit,
393
00:19:05,169 --> 00:19:07,838
so I say to the trooper,
[BELCHES]
394
00:19:07,922 --> 00:19:09,173
Weigh me now.
395
00:19:09,382 --> 00:19:12,260
[LAUGHTER]
396
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:15,596
Kitchen stopped making
breakfast half an hour ago.
397
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:17,431
So, what can I bring you boys?
398
00:19:17,598 --> 00:19:20,101
Oh, man, dang ol' black coffee,
man, and a little water, too.
399
00:19:20,169 --> 00:19:21,769
Where's the dang ol'
restroom at?
400
00:19:21,978 --> 00:19:24,230
Whoa. Slow it down,
sweetheart.
401
00:19:24,438 --> 00:19:27,650
Okay, man, dang ol'...
black... coffee.
402
00:19:27,858 --> 00:19:29,360
BOOMHAUER:
Dang ol' water.
403
00:19:29,443 --> 00:19:31,404
Whoa, I know that voice.
404
00:19:31,487 --> 00:19:33,948
Hey, one of you boys
named Hank?
405
00:19:34,115 --> 00:19:36,200
Uh, we're just going
to have our coffee and go.
406
00:19:36,325 --> 00:19:37,743
We don't need any trouble.
407
00:19:37,910 --> 00:19:39,245
I bet you don't.
408
00:19:39,328 --> 00:19:42,415
You had enough trouble getting
down that mountain this morning.
409
00:19:42,665 --> 00:19:44,875
Man, we been listening
on CB to you guys
410
00:19:44,959 --> 00:19:46,836
coming downhill on 41.
411
00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,462
Glad y'all ain't dead.
412
00:19:48,629 --> 00:19:50,756
MAN: What the hell you boys
sitting over there for?
413
00:19:50,923 --> 00:19:52,258
Come on over here.
414
00:19:56,554 --> 00:19:58,389
Well, all right, huh, Bobby?
415
00:19:58,514 --> 00:20:00,141
Yeah, all right.
416
00:20:00,391 --> 00:20:02,768
Getting downhill
like that took some doing.
417
00:20:02,893 --> 00:20:05,938
What were you gulping on,
reds, bennies, apple wackies?
418
00:20:06,105 --> 00:20:08,858
I don't go in
for the fancy, flavored coffees.
419
00:20:08,941 --> 00:20:10,568
Just regular old joe.
420
00:20:10,818 --> 00:20:12,695
Man, you are old school.
421
00:20:12,862 --> 00:20:14,238
Hey, little friend,
422
00:20:14,363 --> 00:20:15,865
how about taking a seat
423
00:20:15,948 --> 00:20:18,200
and telling me about
that run on that hill?
424
00:20:18,367 --> 00:20:21,370
Sir, much as I would love
to get into it,
425
00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:22,997
we'd better get rolling.
426
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:25,666
We got to finish our haul
and get home by Christmas.
427
00:20:25,833 --> 00:20:26,959
Good man.
428
00:20:27,043 --> 00:20:28,794
But you won't get far
without your mirrors.
429
00:20:28,961 --> 00:20:30,546
Or your headlights.
430
00:20:30,713 --> 00:20:32,089
Yep, suppose that's true.
431
00:20:32,173 --> 00:20:33,466
On the other hand,
432
00:20:33,674 --> 00:20:35,509
if I rode ahead of you,
you wouldn't need them.
433
00:20:35,593 --> 00:20:37,094
And if I get your back,
434
00:20:37,178 --> 00:20:39,013
I can handle your
rearview for you.
435
00:20:39,138 --> 00:20:41,640
You mean like a...
a convoy?
436
00:20:41,807 --> 00:20:43,100
Damn straight.
437
00:20:43,267 --> 00:20:44,560
[CHUCKLES]
438
00:20:44,602 --> 00:20:47,313
[MID-TEMPO COUNTRY INTRO]
439
00:20:47,396 --> 00:20:50,191
? Hank Hill was a trucker
And he drove with pride ?
440
00:20:50,274 --> 00:20:52,735
? His seat belt buckled
And his boy by his side ?
441
00:20:52,818 --> 00:20:56,655
? He hit the road with a promise
And a fresh load ?
442
00:20:57,573 --> 00:21:00,159
? They took a wrong turn
While trying to get back ?
443
00:21:00,242 --> 00:21:03,079
? And wound up stranded
In a mountain gap ?
444
00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:06,123
? Had a diesel in the freezing cold ?
445
00:21:06,874 --> 00:21:09,752
? That old Hank Hill convoy's rolling ?
446
00:21:09,877 --> 00:21:12,463
? And the antique load we're hauling ?
447
00:21:12,588 --> 00:21:16,467
? It's destination Mama's down the line ?
448
00:21:17,343 --> 00:21:20,012
? We was down at the Eat 'Em Up,
The boys and me ?
449
00:21:20,096 --> 00:21:22,598
? Drinking straight black joe
When the old CB ?
450
00:21:22,681 --> 00:21:26,644
? Got to picking up something
Sounded downright weird ?
451
00:21:26,727 --> 00:21:27,812
? It said: ?
452
00:21:27,895 --> 00:21:30,189
BOOMHAUER: ? Dang ol' Hank, man,
Talking about hold on tight ?
453
00:21:30,272 --> 00:21:31,941
? Talking about making
a little ol' left, man ?
454
00:21:32,066 --> 00:21:33,275
? Now, Hank, swing right ?
455
00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:35,027
? Yeah, I tell you,
Had those truckers ?
456
00:21:35,111 --> 00:21:36,487
? Pretty dang scared ?
457
00:21:37,238 --> 00:21:39,990
? Then Hank pulled up
Feeling none too big ?
458
00:21:40,074 --> 00:21:42,451
? We couldn't believe
How he handled that rig ?
459
00:21:42,535 --> 00:21:46,038
? So I said, "Hell, we'll
Help you out, my man" ?
460
00:21:46,997 --> 00:21:49,917
? I'll call Gravel Gut Ben
And One-eyed Mona ?
461
00:21:50,042 --> 00:21:52,419
? We'll get that load out to Arizona ?
462
00:21:52,503 --> 00:21:53,963
? Cause a trucker helps a trucker ?
463
00:21:54,046 --> 00:21:56,006
? Help his mama when he can ?
464
00:21:56,056 --> 00:22:00,606
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
33280
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
