All language subtitles for King of the Hill s03e11 To Spank With Love.eng

[Soft instrumental music]

[Peggy sighing]

I'm getting some nice color.

Look out, Mrs. Hill. Snake!

It's a harmless bull snake. I'd say he...

Pardon, she is about nine months old.

Your mom's as cool as most people's dads.

It's like that book
they took out of the school library:

I've Got Two Dads.

HANK: No, you don't.

[Theme song]

[Telephone ringing]

This is Hill.

Tom Landry Middle School
needs you, Peggy.

This job's for at least a week, maybe two.

Can you sub for Mrs. Gonzales?

Gonzales? That's Spanish, isn't it?

Yes, it is. Your best subject.

You'll be fine, just fine.

There's something you're not telling me.

Dang it, Peggy, I could lose my job.

[Speaking Spanish]

I just can't.
But on a completely unrelated subject...

hasn't it been a while since
your last surprise in-class evaluation?

Yes, it has, but tell me what...

Mrs. Hill, I'm Ms. Ayres.
I'm here to evaluate you.

Really? I had no idea.

My goodness! An evaluation.
Well, that... Imagine.

A substitute.

Attack.

-Hi, Mrs. Hill.
-Buenos day-as, Consuela.

I have always enjoyed
a special relationship with my students.

In fact, one of them
reminded me yesterday...

that I was honored as
Substitute Teacher of the Year...

1996 through 1997, inclusive.

That's impressive. So many subs
get bullied by their students.

A bully is just someone who victimizes
others to make themselves feel important.

Would you like me to repeat that slowly?

No, I'm just penalizing you
for starting class late. You were saying?

[Peggy speaking Spanish
with an American accent]

[Speaking Spanish]

[Speaking Spanish]

[All laughing]

[Peggy speaking Spanish]

[Speaking Spanish]

[Peggy speaking Spanish]

[Boy speaking Spanish]

[Peggy speaking Spanish]

You're dead.

[Peggy speaking Spanish]

[Dooley speaking Spanish]

[Speaking Spanish]

[All laughing]

[Peggy speaking Spanish]

Stop it! I know what you are doing
and just stop it!

[Speaking Spanish]

[Speaking Spanish]

"Needs improvement"?

I have never needed to improve
on anything in my whole life.

This will be in my personnel file forever.

Relax, Peggy. Everyone has a bad day.

I remember back when I first started
at Strickland Propane...

there was this guy who had a bad day.

See, I can't even remember
that fella's name now.

[Students chattering]

All right, everybody, sit down! Andale!

That's odd,
I can't seem to get this to work. It's...

Okay. We don't have a lot of time
for monkey business.

So I think we'll skip attendance today
and finish up our vocabulariolesson.

I have had it with you two.

I am a very fun teacher,
but I will not be bullied.

Give me your watches.
Come on, give it to me.

I/ am not joking, you two.

[Tense instrumental music]

I pulled your pants down.

[Dramatic instrumental music]

Oh, yeah!

[Tense instrumental music]

Holy crap.

Eighteen years of teaching...

thrown out the window
with one flick of the wrist.

Don't panic, Peggy. There's lots you can do.

I could design software.
People have always said that.

I could open up
a paint-your-own-pottery store.

You know how much they get for that?

Now slow down, Peggy.
They won't fire you.

You're a substitute teacher.

They'll just stop calling.
But that's not going to happen either.

Maybe it should. I hit an innocent child.

I'm sure you didn't hurt him.

I should know.
I got spanked plenty in school.

Really? Well, you turned out just fine.

Better than fine. And back then,
they even used a paddle called OI' Spanky.

It was a piece of hickory about yea big...

and it had holes drilled in it
to cut down on wind resistance...

and a little pine tar on the handle...

for a no-slip grip.

Good OI' Spanky.

Mom, what were you thinking?

Bobby, honey, I am so sorry.
I just did not know what to do.

Dooley pantsed you. That's what he does.

And when it happens,
you pull up your pants and move on.

If you don't know that, no wonder
you bombed on your evaluation.

PEGGY: I never even spank our dog.

Not that your son is worse than our dog,
because he's not.

And we have a good dog.
So that speaks volumes for your son.

Please, we should apologize to you.
I'm sure Stuart deserved it.

-We know what a handful he can be.
-What are you saying?

You did good.

Let's see, teacher's statement,
response from the parents.

Okay, looks like all our ducks are in a row.
Peggy, you're fired.

But the Dooleys forgave me.

Let's see. There's nothing in here
about forgiveness.

There are procedures
for administering legal spankings...

which you violated at every turn.

There are procedures for terminating
a teacher, which I followed to a T.

Emily!

I'm required to have a hall monitor
escort you off campus.

It's over, Mrs. Hill.

[Peggy sobbing]

I'm sorry, ladies. Looks like
there's not going to be a threepeat.

What am I gonna do?

Well, I got you a book
on designing software.

[Peggy sobbing]

You had it all, Peggy Hill.

Hey, there, Hank's wife.
What you crying for? Got your monthlies?

Cotton, I am in no mood.
Why are you here?

VFW meeting and pancake supper.

So I'll need you to whip me up
some pancakes.

Couple of hundred will do.
And as much syrup as you gots.

Fine, I will go make you 200 pancakes.

How's Bobby?

He's just fine. But my information
about Bobby is a little dated.

He hasn't spoken to me since I got fired...

for spanking a student.

-Fired? What'd you do? Kill him?
-No!

Ain't no law against spanking.

Tell you what,
I've got a friend over to the VFW.

Used to principal at Hank's school.

He'll have you back spanking in no time.

I just want my job back,
I'm not gonna spank again.

COTTON: Shut up before you talk
me out of it.

In my 35 years
at Tom Landry Middle School...

I spanked thousands of students...

shaping their character...

and preparing them
to die in wars overseas.

Actually, I only spanked once.

She's just being modest. She's the first
teacher, since they killed LBJ...

to stand up to those draft dodgers.

All right, Peggy, we're gonna get you
back in that classroom.

Damn straight!

Step one:
You gotta meet the school board...

Ol' Spanky.

[All laughing]

Go on, take it. It's yours.
I got nobody to hit anymore.

Thanks for this terrific symbol,
and for helping me to get my job back.

All right, let's hear it for Paddlin' Peggy!

WENDELL: Take off your top!

VETERAN: Shut up, Wendell.
That's tomorrow night.

PEGGY: Hi, guys.

I just had the most inspiring afternoon
with Cotton and his army buddies.

They're gonna circulate a petition
to help me get my job back.

I even have the support
of your old principal, Jeter Turbeville.

Jeter the Beater?

Oh, God, what's that under your arm?

Ol' Spanky. Can you believe
they ever used something like this?

[Peggy chuckling]

Spanking was wrong then,
and it's wrong now.

I say, spare the rod and spoil the child.

Dale, spare the rod and spoil the child...

means you're in favor of spanking.

I don't think so.

Man, I tell you what,
bringing back old bad memories...

about talking about old Jeter the Beater.

Whack, man, tied to that old pillow.

Well, I don't know.
My daddy spanked me every day...

from when I was nine till I was 16,
and I turned out okay.

Bastard.

-Peggy, we sure do miss you at Landry.
-Thanks.

I'm not a spanker, okay?

But if you can bring discipline
back into our school...

then I am behind you 100%.
I wish I had the guts you do, sister.

I'm no hero. Stuart Dooley just caught me
on a bad day.

Don't be modest. You are an inspiration
to all of us teachers.

And that's why we signed that petition
in support of Paddlin' Peggy.

Well, that's just those vets being silly.
Here, have a button.

The School Board vote
on reinstating Mrs. Peggy Hill passes.

TEACHER: All right, Paddlin' Peggy!
Walk tall, sister.

We did it, Hank's wife!

Party at my house. Pancakes for everyone!

WENDELL: Take off your top!

-I'm off to work, Mrs. Hill.
-Me, too, Mr. Hill.

HANK: Mrs. Hill, why are you bringing
the paddle?

I have to. People are expecting it.

Besides, your father worked very hard...

to put Paddlin' Peggy
back in the classroom.

See, that's the thing.
My dad thinks you're gonna use it.

Hank, don't be silly, honey.

It's just a bluff.
I am gonna scare my students...

exactly the way President Reagan
scared hundreds of millions of Russians...

with his Star Wars death beam.

I miss voting for that man.

Listen, I just want to apologize
for what happened the other day.

I will never ever spank another student
like that again...

because now I have this.

But, of course,
it will not be necessary to use this...

because now you all know I have it in me.

So why don't we just start all over?

[Speaking Spanish]

[Dramatic instrumental music]

[Speaking Spanish]

Do you think she's gonna use that paddle?

JOSEPH: I don't know,
but I'll tell you what--

Excuse me.
Should you be talking while I am talking?

Paddlin' Peggy says...

[Stuttering]

Paddlin' Peggy says...

[Mutters negation]

BOBBY: You gotta do something
about Mom.

This whole Paddlin' Peggy shtick
is really creepy.

Joseph won't even
come over to play anymore...

'cause he says he's having nightmares
about that stupid paddle.

Did you hear that?

My son is dreaming
about getting spanked by your wife.

That's not so unusual.

You gotta get your woman in line.

Peggy's kind of hard to talk to lately.

She's feeling powerful now.

So her body is producing
extra amounts of testosterone.

I bet if Peggy wanted to,
she could grow a mustache.

'Course, I don't know why she'd want to.

[Tense instrumental music]

Guess who won best French manicure
at the beauty academy today?

Dad, can I go ride bikes with Joseph?

I thought we'd watch Shark Week
on the Discovery Channel.

-Michael Palin is hosting.
-I don't want to.

But, honey, you love Michael Palin.
Are you coming down with something?

Let me feel your forehead.

I don't want to watch
your stupid show, okay?

Bobby.

-What is wrong with him?
-Probably nothing.

Or it could be you...

and your whupping stick.

It's a paddle and he has a name:
Ol' Spanky.

Hank, do I tell you how to sell propane
and propane accessories?

Did I criticize you
for your big Spatula Tuesday fiasco?

No, I did not,
because I respect you as a professional.

And that is all I want, Hank,
just a little respect.

But I guess that's too much to ask for
from you and Bobby.

All right, it was Sharon a Johnson.

It's not fair. She works really hard.

[Tense instrumental music]

Channel 84 wants to do something
on Paddlin' Peggy.

-Where is OI' Spanky?
-Maybe you left it at work.

No, I know I had it with me
on the drive home.

I remember brandishing it
at this idiot who almost cut me off.

I've got to retrace my steps home.

Okay, I'm driving home. Brandish.

Oh, God!
I must have dropped it on the street.

Stop, Peggy! Would you look at yourself?

Spanky!

PEGGY: Joseph, did you put this here?
JOSEPH: No.

Joseph, you are talking to
Paddlin' Peggy here.

All right, what's going on?

Your son stole my Paddlin' Peggy paddle.

This is the only thing that stands
between the Arlen school system...

and complete chaos.

-Apologize, you!
-I didn't do anything.

All right, I am not all talk, you know.

You didn't apologize,
so you chose your fate.

-Somebody stop her!
-Peggy. no!

I said, I didn't do anything.

He's telling the truth, Mom.
He was with me all day.

-Well, somebody took it.
-It was Bill!

No, it wasn't.

All right, it was me. I took it.

Somebody had to stop you. You're crazy!

[Solemn instrumental music]

Oh, my!

It's okay, son. Daddy's here.

You big bully.

Hank, what was I thinking?

HANK: The important thing is
your spanking days are over, right?

So are my teaching days.
At least until the day they make pants...

that cannot be pulled down
by someone other than the wearer.

Sounds to me like you're scared.

You know, I have a little speech
I've been saving...

for the day Bobby gets beat up by a bully...

but I don't think that's ever gonna happen.

Him and his darn prop comedy.
Every time the boy gets into a jam...

he shoves French fries up his nose
and makes a new friend.

Anyway, I think my speech
might apply here. Do you want to hear it?

Hank, no. You know, somewhere inside me
is the old Peggy Hill...

the one who taught children
without scaring the bejesus out of them.

I just need to find her again.

And then she freaked out and dropped
the paddle right in the middle of the alley.

And without that paddle
she looked just like Bobby's mom.

That's the bell.

[Tense instrumental music]

Buenos dias, clase.

Serior Dooley,
I thought you were suspended.

I thought you were fired.

[All laughing]

Bygones are bygones, so welcome back.

I thought we might talk about
a special part of Spanish history.

Your feet are big.

Paddlin' Peggy, why don't you spank them?

Yeah, Paddlin' Peggy.

Fine. All you children are interested in
is punishment.

So I will teach you about punishment...

with this.

[All exclaiming in fear]

Yes!

PEGGY: Oh, yeah!

Spain, 1478.
The weapon of choice, the mace.

It was the beginning
of the Spanish Inquisition.

Even though it was begun
with the best of intentions...

a number of very nice, innocent people
were brutally punished.

And without a doubt, the worst thing
about the Spanish Inquisition...

was that nobody ever said they were sorry.

-How were they punished?
-All kinds of awful ways.

Like what?

PEGGY: Well, sometimes they would strike
you with one of these.

Sometimes they would make you lie
on a bed of spikes...

and then pour boiling oil on you.

And sometimes they would tie your arms
and legs to four different horses...

and tear you apart.

[All exclaiming in fear]

Cool.

Why, I feel like I'm being watched. Joseph.

JOSEPH: Now what?

DALE: Careful, Joseph.

I'm just here to play with Bobby.
I don't want any trouble.

I could use a little help preparing the soil.
Why don't you spread the mulch?

-What's it made out of?
-Paddle.

And goat manure.

[Theme song]

[Dooley speaking Spanish]

Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0