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1
00:00:04,650 --> 00:00:07,230
I'm just gonna attach
this lapel mic, sir.
2
00:00:08,530 --> 00:00:09,320
[grunts]
3
00:00:10,280 --> 00:00:13,610
So, you want me to talk about
persephone odair? That's easy.
4
00:00:13,740 --> 00:00:16,280
She was a brilliant entrepreneur
who wanted to save the world.
5
00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:19,160
How I wish that was
her only shortcoming.
6
00:00:20,450 --> 00:00:24,120
My company, lifeboat,
can take an ocean of salt water
7
00:00:24,170 --> 00:00:26,670
And transform it into
clean drinking water,
8
00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:29,000
Cheaply and efficiently
with a machine
9
00:00:29,090 --> 00:00:31,840
Only the size of a can of oats.
10
00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:33,300
[audience]
[gasps] oats!
11
00:00:33,430 --> 00:00:36,050
Now, the doubters call this goal
"impossible,"
12
00:00:36,180 --> 00:00:39,680
But I prefer to say:
"I'm possible."
13
00:00:39,770 --> 00:00:41,720
[applause]
14
00:00:41,810 --> 00:00:43,640
♪ ♪
15
00:00:46,610 --> 00:00:48,440
[narrator] this story is about
a little girl who had a dream.
16
00:00:48,570 --> 00:00:50,230
But it begins with
another little girl
17
00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:51,610
Who allowed us
to use the footage
18
00:00:51,740 --> 00:00:54,030
From when she interviewed
the first little girl
19
00:00:54,150 --> 00:00:55,200
Who is no longer a little girl.
20
00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:57,910
I'm so excited to be
interviewing
21
00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:00,830
Persephone odair,
ceo of lifeboat.
22
00:01:00,910 --> 00:01:02,580
So, persephone,
23
00:01:02,750 --> 00:01:05,620
You were the most be-badged
girl scout of all time
24
00:01:05,750 --> 00:01:07,960
And then followed
in the footsteps of bill gates
25
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:10,130
By dropping out of harvard
early.
26
00:01:10,210 --> 00:01:11,670
The earliest ever.
27
00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:15,010
Our car didn't even slow down on
freshmen move-in day.
28
00:01:17,180 --> 00:01:18,680
So inspirational.
29
00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:22,510
What was the "aha moment"
that gave you the idea
30
00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:23,600
To start lifeboat?
31
00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:24,890
Great question.
32
00:01:24,980 --> 00:01:27,560
And, lisa, great questions are
the jackhammers,
33
00:01:27,690 --> 00:01:30,270
Which demo the walls built
by distrupto-phobes
34
00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:33,320
To create the open floorplan
of innovation.
35
00:01:33,440 --> 00:01:36,030
I've always thought that
about questions.
36
00:01:36,110 --> 00:01:39,030
[persephone]
lisa, my grandfather was
a world war ii sailor
37
00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:40,200
Whose ship was torpedoed.
38
00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:42,700
He was stranded
on a lifeboat, lisa,
39
00:01:42,830 --> 00:01:46,570
Surrounded by water
but not a drop to drink.
40
00:01:46,670 --> 00:01:48,210
Don't tell me he died.
41
00:01:48,290 --> 00:01:49,000
Worse.
42
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:49,960
He gave up.
43
00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:52,090
And then he died, of quitting
44
00:01:52,210 --> 00:01:54,380
And super-duper dehydration.
45
00:01:54,550 --> 00:01:56,090
But I will never give up
46
00:01:56,220 --> 00:01:59,680
Until I've raised enough capital
to make lifeboat a reality.
47
00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:01,590
[chuckling] so if you know
any billionaires...
48
00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:04,560
Well, the only one in our town
is mr. Burns,
49
00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:05,770
And he's awful.
50
00:02:05,890 --> 00:02:08,270
Once, he clear-cut a forest
51
00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,770
Because he thought a squirrel
was looking at him funny.
52
00:02:10,900 --> 00:02:13,690
♪ ♪
53
00:02:13,820 --> 00:02:15,780
Montgomery burns. Mm.
54
00:02:15,820 --> 00:02:18,070
Interesting idea, lisa.
55
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,990
No, I didn't say it
to be an idea!
56
00:02:20,120 --> 00:02:21,320
He's terrible.
57
00:02:21,450 --> 00:02:24,330
Whatever you do,
don't go to him.
58
00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:26,410
[narrator]
but the woman who once tried
59
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:28,620
To clone sheryl sandberg
for a school project
60
00:02:28,710 --> 00:02:30,290
Would not be deterred.
61
00:02:33,380 --> 00:02:35,340
Welcome to orlando.
Quick heads-up.
62
00:02:35,510 --> 00:02:37,460
We may have to cut
this panel short
63
00:02:37,550 --> 00:02:39,830
Due to our third
once-in-a-million-year
64
00:02:39,930 --> 00:02:41,550
Hurricane this season.
65
00:02:41,640 --> 00:02:43,800
-[wind whistling]
-put this on my reel!
66
00:02:43,920 --> 00:02:46,560
-Terrible luck.
-No fault of anyone's.
67
00:02:46,640 --> 00:02:50,140
Mr. Burns, climate change has
left the earth in peril.
68
00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:52,900
Who sent you? John muir?
Friedrich engels?
69
00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:54,560
Mike doonesbury?
70
00:02:54,650 --> 00:02:57,110
I'm getting word that
this hurricane is meeting up
71
00:02:57,190 --> 00:02:59,400
With the everglades super fire.
72
00:03:00,410 --> 00:03:03,320
Montgomery, I'm the founder of
a desalination company.
73
00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:05,990
Our world is
running out of water,
74
00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:08,490
And we need a hero to rescue us.
75
00:03:08,500 --> 00:03:11,920
And I believe that
that hero is your money.
76
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:14,080
[wind howling]
77
00:03:14,210 --> 00:03:16,540
We sell chemicals
that can put out that fire.
78
00:03:16,670 --> 00:03:19,510
Granted, those chemicals
turn alligators into godzillas,
79
00:03:19,590 --> 00:03:22,880
But we're working on a bomb
that can fix that.
80
00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:25,550
Sorry, miss.
Desalination is a snooze.
81
00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:28,510
But I do want in
on the godzilla bomb.
82
00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:32,140
[narrator]
persephone was not shy
about hounding mr. Burns,
83
00:03:32,270 --> 00:03:34,810
And he wasn't shy
about hounding her.
84
00:03:34,980 --> 00:03:36,230
[barking, snarling]
85
00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:38,070
Some fish just swim
with the tide.
86
00:03:38,150 --> 00:03:40,440
I'm the kind of relentless fish
87
00:03:40,570 --> 00:03:44,660
That falls down ten times
before it runs up the mountain.
88
00:03:44,780 --> 00:03:46,740
On ocean shoes.
89
00:03:48,950 --> 00:03:51,040
[whirring]
90
00:04:00,090 --> 00:04:02,800
Eh. Fine, you've got
five minutes.
91
00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:04,800
Who are these goateed wastrels?
92
00:04:04,890 --> 00:04:06,340
A documentary crew.
93
00:04:06,510 --> 00:04:10,270
Only the most paradigm-shifting
start-up ceos have them.
94
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:14,230
Mr. Burns, I see your life
as a beautiful business opera
95
00:04:14,310 --> 00:04:17,440
And investing in lifeboat
as the climactic aria
96
00:04:17,570 --> 00:04:20,530
That will put you
in the same pantheon as getty,
97
00:04:20,650 --> 00:04:22,650
Vanderbilt, the spanx lady.
98
00:04:22,740 --> 00:04:26,530
Desalination is an expensive
and inefficient industry
99
00:04:26,620 --> 00:04:28,070
Begging to be disrupted.
100
00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:30,160
Success is a decision.
101
00:04:30,290 --> 00:04:31,950
Dare to choose it, sir.
102
00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:34,040
-Dare to.
-Of course.
103
00:04:34,170 --> 00:04:36,170
Like how I chose
to be born rich.
104
00:04:36,290 --> 00:04:39,170
Together we can disrupt
big salt water.
105
00:04:39,210 --> 00:04:41,050
You mean... The ocean?
106
00:04:41,170 --> 00:04:43,670
Exactly,
or should I say...
107
00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:45,510
[both]
excellent.
108
00:04:45,590 --> 00:04:48,090
Not only am I pledging
much of my personal wealth
109
00:04:48,180 --> 00:04:51,640
To lifeboat, but I'm giving
the company cooling tower a
110
00:04:51,770 --> 00:04:53,220
To use as its headquarters.
111
00:04:53,310 --> 00:04:56,230
Cooling tower a was
mr. Burns' favorite tower.
112
00:04:56,310 --> 00:04:59,400
He always said it held
so many precious memories.
113
00:05:01,190 --> 00:05:03,690
In addition,
all workers in sector 7-g
114
00:05:03,780 --> 00:05:05,360
Are immediately fired...
115
00:05:05,450 --> 00:05:07,530
Hey, that's me!
Screw you, pig!
116
00:05:07,700 --> 00:05:10,780
...And are rehired at
higher tech industry salaries.
117
00:05:10,870 --> 00:05:12,540
Bless you, pig!
118
00:05:12,660 --> 00:05:13,910
[narrator]
burns brought
his wealthiest friends
119
00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:15,620
Into persephone's fold.
120
00:05:15,710 --> 00:05:19,580
When I invest, I look at
the business's key fundamental:
121
00:05:19,710 --> 00:05:24,380
Am I under the delusion that
I have a shot with the ceo?
122
00:05:25,340 --> 00:05:27,090
[giggling]
123
00:05:27,220 --> 00:05:28,590
[narrator]
burns and persephone were soon
124
00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:30,760
Running the new company
side by side,
125
00:05:30,890 --> 00:05:32,430
Overseeing a start-up culture
126
00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:34,390
Where everyone had
a creative title.
127
00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:38,100
Persephone odair, founder
and status quo demolitionist.
128
00:05:38,190 --> 00:05:40,980
Montgomery burns,
chief change alchemist.
129
00:05:41,070 --> 00:05:43,230
Waylon smithers,
purposefulness warlock.
130
00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:45,740
Carl carlson,
braindump magician.
131
00:05:45,780 --> 00:05:48,030
Lenny leonard,
storytelling ninja.
132
00:05:48,070 --> 00:05:50,280
Homer simpson,
"compet-ticy" rockstar.
133
00:05:50,330 --> 00:05:51,910
[director]
competency?
134
00:05:51,950 --> 00:05:53,160
Say it again.
135
00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:54,870
If anyone can transform burns,
136
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:56,290
It's a visionary
like persephone.
137
00:05:56,460 --> 00:05:58,500
Like, if you work at lifeboat,
you have to use
138
00:05:58,670 --> 00:06:00,000
These metal drinking straws.
139
00:06:00,130 --> 00:06:02,250
It's so easy to clean
after every use.
140
00:06:02,380 --> 00:06:03,670
[grunting]
141
00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:05,210
I'm just... [groans]
142
00:06:05,300 --> 00:06:06,760
Why does it have to bend?
143
00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:08,670
[straining]
144
00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:11,140
♪ this is my fight song ♪
145
00:06:11,220 --> 00:06:14,100
♪ take back my life song ♪
146
00:06:14,180 --> 00:06:17,390
♪ prove I'm all right song. ♪
147
00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:20,310
[grunting]
148
00:06:21,610 --> 00:06:24,440
-[cheering]
-my fellow lifeboaters!
149
00:06:24,610 --> 00:06:28,320
I'm so excited to have you
on this journey with me.
150
00:06:28,450 --> 00:06:32,490
Imagine a world with an endless
supply of drinkable water.
151
00:06:32,620 --> 00:06:36,120
A world where every hotel towel
can be used once
152
00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:39,830
And then dropped on the floor.
153
00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:41,830
Oh, there are a lot of changes.
154
00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:43,290
Unlike when this was
a nuclear plant,
155
00:06:43,380 --> 00:06:45,420
Security's super tight now,
156
00:06:45,550 --> 00:06:48,050
And we have to sign
stringent ndas.
157
00:06:48,170 --> 00:06:50,630
And I am bad at keeping secrets.
158
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:53,050
Like how I'm not supposed to
talk about lenny's crush
159
00:06:53,140 --> 00:06:54,890
-On his italian tutor.
-Homer.
160
00:06:54,930 --> 00:06:56,890
[speaking italian]
161
00:06:57,020 --> 00:06:58,560
[narrator]
lifeboat was soaring,
162
00:06:58,690 --> 00:07:00,640
But no one could've predicted
what shocking turn
163
00:07:00,770 --> 00:07:02,600
Was in store for the company.
164
00:07:02,770 --> 00:07:04,310
Um, is this one of
those documentaries
165
00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:06,480
Where I'm not supposed to
look at the camera?
166
00:07:06,570 --> 00:07:09,280
Or is it like the office,
where I always look at it
167
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,650
And do a big take
so the audience knows
168
00:07:11,740 --> 00:07:13,610
When to laugh?
169
00:07:15,660 --> 00:07:18,910
In richness and wealth,
for richer and richer,
170
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:23,000
I now pronounce you
husband and wife.
171
00:07:31,680 --> 00:07:32,840
I'm still pinching myself.
172
00:07:33,010 --> 00:07:35,890
I'm married to montgomery burns.
173
00:07:36,010 --> 00:07:38,010
Nuclear industry legend.
174
00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:40,390
Chief s'more toaster
at the bohemian grove.
175
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:42,390
The first man
with no blood type.
176
00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:44,690
What a joy
to wake up in the morning,
177
00:07:44,770 --> 00:07:45,980
Turn my head on the pillow
178
00:07:46,070 --> 00:07:47,900
And see her bedroom door
through the glass
179
00:07:47,980 --> 00:07:50,070
Of my hyperbaric chamber.
180
00:07:50,110 --> 00:07:54,320
[narrator]
soon, persephone and burns were
the new it power couple.
181
00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:01,290
And the press couldn't get
enough of this may...
182
00:08:01,410 --> 00:08:04,030
Last-minute-of-December romance.
183
00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:06,170
It's so refreshing
to see a young person
184
00:08:06,210 --> 00:08:07,670
With the world at her feet
185
00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:11,460
Who also sees the glory
that is montgomery burns.
186
00:08:11,550 --> 00:08:14,180
[slurping]
187
00:08:16,850 --> 00:08:19,060
[slurping continues]
188
00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:24,100
[narrator]
now it was up to persephone
189
00:08:24,270 --> 00:08:25,850
To create a working prototype of
190
00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:28,020
Her amazing
desalination technology.
191
00:08:28,070 --> 00:08:29,940
The water in front of you
comes from
192
00:08:29,980 --> 00:08:31,860
The functional prototype of
193
00:08:31,950 --> 00:08:33,990
The lifeboat
desalination machine.
194
00:08:34,030 --> 00:08:35,660
So everyone please raise a glass
195
00:08:35,700 --> 00:08:38,740
To milestone
this history-defining moment.
196
00:08:39,740 --> 00:08:41,410
[overlapping chatter]
197
00:08:41,540 --> 00:08:43,540
Oh, no, you can't
drink it now. No.
198
00:08:43,670 --> 00:08:46,580
Our competitors could steal
the proprietary aquatech
199
00:08:46,630 --> 00:08:47,710
In your urine.
200
00:08:47,750 --> 00:08:49,840
[overlapping chatter]
201
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,840
And just in case any of
our patented evaporated mist
202
00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:54,260
Made it into your bladders,
203
00:08:54,380 --> 00:08:57,290
We've arranged to have you all
catheterized.
204
00:08:57,430 --> 00:08:59,220
[overlapping excited chatter]
205
00:08:59,350 --> 00:09:01,220
[whirring]
206
00:09:01,270 --> 00:09:04,230
So lifeboat was just following
the tech industry playbook:
207
00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:06,190
Fake it till you make it.
208
00:09:06,270 --> 00:09:09,270
Or as I call it,
"lie-po until you ipo."
209
00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:12,690
But the employees were already
dreaming of cashing out.
210
00:09:12,780 --> 00:09:14,610
Tech salaries are the greatest.
211
00:09:14,740 --> 00:09:17,110
This week, I gave marge
200 stock options
212
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,740
To go grocery shopping.
213
00:09:18,830 --> 00:09:20,030
It didn't work at all.
214
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,870
I had to put all the food
back on the shelves.
215
00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:24,830
[narrator] meanwhile,
the newly minted tech workers
216
00:09:24,870 --> 00:09:28,120
Were adapting to a much
different corporate culture.
217
00:09:28,210 --> 00:09:30,880
At the new company,
people were so secretive
218
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,590
They actually moved the post-it
notes with their passwords
219
00:09:33,670 --> 00:09:35,210
Off their monitor.
220
00:09:38,250 --> 00:09:40,720
Workers were getting fired
every day.
221
00:09:40,850 --> 00:09:44,310
That tattoo is the intellectual
property of the company.
222
00:09:44,390 --> 00:09:45,640
[buzzing]
223
00:09:46,850 --> 00:09:49,850
The whole company got
so paranoid.
224
00:09:49,940 --> 00:09:51,940
Because of those ndas he signed,
225
00:09:52,030 --> 00:09:55,110
Homer couldn't even tell me
how his day was.
226
00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:57,240
I can neither confirm nor deny
I had a day.
227
00:09:57,320 --> 00:09:59,780
Well, it was strange
they wouldn't let me
228
00:09:59,820 --> 00:10:02,530
Look inside the machines,
since my title was
229
00:10:02,620 --> 00:10:06,290
Chief engineer of
inside the machine.
230
00:10:06,410 --> 00:10:08,210
And whenever a reporter came by,
231
00:10:08,330 --> 00:10:12,000
It seemed like they were trying
to cover something up.
232
00:10:12,130 --> 00:10:16,090
Well, still better than working
for zuckerberg!
233
00:10:16,170 --> 00:10:19,680
They were hiding something, and
it was really freaking me out.
234
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,090
So I emailed persephone.
235
00:10:21,180 --> 00:10:23,510
And the next day, carl was gone.
236
00:10:31,510 --> 00:10:33,860
[narrator]
despite the red flags flying
from this lifeboat,
237
00:10:33,980 --> 00:10:35,860
There continued to be believers.
238
00:10:35,940 --> 00:10:38,570
Persephone dominates
my vision board.
239
00:10:38,660 --> 00:10:40,570
Sure, she married mr. Burns,
240
00:10:40,660 --> 00:10:43,240
But as ceo,
a woman had all the power.
241
00:10:43,330 --> 00:10:46,410
That's what made
the internet trolls so mad.
242
00:10:46,540 --> 00:10:49,210
[narrator]
all the online negativity
stirred up
243
00:10:49,290 --> 00:10:52,500
The finger-tempted anger of
a different kind of troll.
244
00:10:52,590 --> 00:10:53,750
Hmm.
245
00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:56,170
♪ this is my fight song ♪
246
00:10:56,260 --> 00:10:59,130
♪ take back my life song... ♪
247
00:10:59,220 --> 00:11:01,760
I wanted to give my wife--
wow, wife,
248
00:11:01,890 --> 00:11:03,090
Still getting used to
saying that--
249
00:11:03,180 --> 00:11:05,970
A little something special
for her birthday.
250
00:11:06,060 --> 00:11:07,640
A twitter gift card?
251
00:11:07,770 --> 00:11:09,730
No. I bought you twitter.
252
00:11:09,810 --> 00:11:12,470
The whole company.
It was a bargain.
253
00:11:12,560 --> 00:11:13,980
The previous owner
had to sell it
254
00:11:14,150 --> 00:11:15,820
After his self-driving
mars rocket
255
00:11:15,980 --> 00:11:18,360
Crashed into the international
space station.
256
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,110
Oh! Mm.
257
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:21,490
Mr. Burns, you deleted
258
00:11:21,610 --> 00:11:23,410
All negative tweets
about persephone.
259
00:11:23,490 --> 00:11:25,830
Is that evidence that
you're in a kind of cult
260
00:11:25,990 --> 00:11:28,120
And won't hear any criticism
of your leader?
261
00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,160
Yes, I am in a cult.
262
00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:32,290
It's called a marriage.
[laughs]
263
00:11:32,380 --> 00:11:35,250
My wife is the head of it,
and my job is to support her.
264
00:11:35,290 --> 00:11:38,170
Now, maybe you're the cult
leader in your marriage, andrew,
265
00:11:38,260 --> 00:11:41,010
But I know pilar,
and I suspect she'd disagree.
266
00:11:41,130 --> 00:11:43,760
[laughter]
267
00:11:43,850 --> 00:11:46,430
[narrator] but lifeboat
was rocked by a fresh scandal,
268
00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:48,970
When an anonymous whistleblower
bravely came forward
269
00:11:49,060 --> 00:11:50,930
With damning new information.
270
00:11:51,020 --> 00:11:52,730
[distorted voice] my best friend
carl was abducted
271
00:11:52,810 --> 00:11:54,350
Because he was about
to go public
272
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:56,560
With a story that
would destroy this company.
273
00:11:56,650 --> 00:11:58,270
People need to know the truth.
274
00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,280
The lifeboat machine
doesn't work.
275
00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:03,490
[narrator]
the whistle was blown
and the damage was done.
276
00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:12,120
Ma'am, ma'am,
the whistleblower claims
277
00:12:12,210 --> 00:12:13,290
The only person who has seen
278
00:12:13,420 --> 00:12:15,460
The inside of
your desalination machine
279
00:12:15,500 --> 00:12:16,500
Has disappeared.
280
00:12:16,590 --> 00:12:17,540
Isn't that suspicious?
281
00:12:17,710 --> 00:12:19,380
Why do you doubt a female ceo
282
00:12:19,420 --> 00:12:21,010
But believe
the silhouette of a man
283
00:12:21,090 --> 00:12:22,300
Sitting in the dark?
284
00:12:22,470 --> 00:12:25,720
News flash!
Women have faces now.
285
00:12:25,850 --> 00:12:27,140
[narrator]
at this moment,
286
00:12:27,220 --> 00:12:28,680
Allegations that
its core technology
287
00:12:28,770 --> 00:12:32,100
Does not work are threatening
lifeboat's very survival.
288
00:12:32,270 --> 00:12:34,140
-[thunder rumbles]
-is this the beginning
of the end
289
00:12:34,190 --> 00:12:36,270
For this
once-promising start-up?
290
00:12:36,310 --> 00:12:37,810
[female narrator]
and the answer is...
291
00:12:37,860 --> 00:12:39,190
Absolutely not.
292
00:12:39,230 --> 00:12:40,980
Lifeboat will save humanity
293
00:12:41,150 --> 00:12:43,530
And become the world's
most profitable company.
294
00:12:43,650 --> 00:12:46,160
Join us next time
for lifeboat afloat,
295
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,530
Persephone's total vindication.
296
00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:52,500
[burns] this documentary series
is now a burnsco production.
297
00:12:57,340 --> 00:12:58,880
Montgomery burns wasn't happy
298
00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:00,210
With the documentary
299
00:13:00,300 --> 00:13:01,920
About his wife's start-up,
so he bought the company
300
00:13:02,050 --> 00:13:03,420
That made it,
but that didn't stop others
301
00:13:03,550 --> 00:13:06,090
From telling the story,
because the business of
302
00:13:06,260 --> 00:13:09,350
Business documentaries is
big business.
303
00:13:11,390 --> 00:13:13,520
We've unearthed even more
never-before-seen footage
304
00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:15,850
Of the beatles,
including six hours
305
00:13:15,940 --> 00:13:17,730
Of them
discussing drinking water.
306
00:13:17,810 --> 00:13:21,110
The thing about water,
you can't make tea without it.
307
00:13:21,230 --> 00:13:23,190
What if you made tea
out of coffee?
308
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:25,360
What if you made coffee
out of tea?
309
00:13:25,450 --> 00:13:27,610
Uh, fellas, maybe
we should play some music.
310
00:13:27,660 --> 00:13:30,870
[sips] why do they call it h2o?
311
00:13:30,990 --> 00:13:32,990
I bet no reason at all.
312
00:13:34,660 --> 00:13:37,210
[narrator]
just weeks ago,
lifeboat stopped payment
313
00:13:37,290 --> 00:13:39,460
On their stadium naming rights.
314
00:13:46,340 --> 00:13:48,130
Despite the glut of
lifeboat documentaries,
315
00:13:48,260 --> 00:13:51,430
The definitive version was made
by a storyteller so compelling,
316
00:13:51,470 --> 00:13:55,180
He made 12 hours on
the national parks feel like 11.
317
00:13:55,310 --> 00:13:57,600
♪ ♪
318
00:14:11,410 --> 00:14:13,410
[peter coyote]
the mysterious whistleblower
alleged that
319
00:14:13,580 --> 00:14:17,000
Persephone's desalination
machine was fraudulent.
320
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:19,210
[distorted voice] the lifeboat
machine doesn't work.
321
00:14:19,290 --> 00:14:20,670
[peter coyote]
unfortunately for him,
322
00:14:20,750 --> 00:14:23,920
Mr. Burns' legal team had
acquired the raw footage
323
00:14:24,050 --> 00:14:27,260
Of the whistleblower's
damning interview.
324
00:14:27,380 --> 00:14:29,880
[distorted voice]
the machine doesn't work.
325
00:14:29,970 --> 00:14:31,930
Hey, I ordered this sub toasted.
326
00:14:32,010 --> 00:14:33,430
This is only lightly toasted.
327
00:14:33,510 --> 00:14:35,600
[normal voice] is this
how you treat a whistleblower?
328
00:14:35,680 --> 00:14:37,020
Uh-oh.
329
00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:39,180
[peter coyote]
mr. Burns and persephone
now knew
330
00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:41,810
The identity of
the man who betrayed them.
331
00:14:41,860 --> 00:14:44,980
And the hiring of lawyers
to destroy homer simpson
332
00:14:45,150 --> 00:14:48,320
Proved to be quite
the aphrodisiac.
333
00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:51,780
[both moaning]
334
00:14:51,910 --> 00:14:53,200
[peter coyote]
lifeboat lawyers were relentless
335
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,240
-In trying to subpoena homer...
-[screams]
336
00:14:55,330 --> 00:14:58,250
...And sue him for breaking
his nda.
337
00:15:04,090 --> 00:15:05,880
[lisa]
my dad got an anonymous message
338
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,880
Saying there was something
he had to see,
339
00:15:07,970 --> 00:15:09,130
So I went with him.
340
00:15:09,220 --> 00:15:10,590
What I saw changed
341
00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:13,640
The one thing I thought
could never be changed--
342
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:15,220
My mind.
343
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:24,310
[gasps] carl.
You sent the message.
344
00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:27,190
You've been working in the lab
all along?
345
00:15:29,740 --> 00:15:31,280
If I didn't do their dirty work,
346
00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:33,410
They'd tell the world
my dark secret.
347
00:15:33,450 --> 00:15:35,990
I've been to 700
jimmy buffet concerts!
348
00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:37,620
I'm a parrot-head.
349
00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:40,200
"cheeseburger in paradise"!
350
00:15:40,330 --> 00:15:41,910
[lisa]
so, what are they making you do?
351
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:44,580
I'm putting something
in the lifeboat machines
352
00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:46,630
Called "jab-a-tose."
353
00:15:46,710 --> 00:15:48,500
Well, if I may frink-splain.
354
00:15:48,550 --> 00:15:49,800
In 1970,
355
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:52,840
A very popular diet soda
called jab
356
00:15:52,970 --> 00:15:56,680
Was discontinued because
of the overpowering sweetness
357
00:15:56,760 --> 00:15:58,350
Of its artificial flavor.
358
00:15:59,350 --> 00:16:03,640
Lifeboat bought up thousands of
cases of unsold jab sodas
359
00:16:03,690 --> 00:16:06,770
Because jab-a-tose was so strong
360
00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:09,730
It could completely mask
the taste of salt.
361
00:16:09,860 --> 00:16:13,110
Oh, my god. This machine
doesn't take out the salt.
362
00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:15,910
It masks it with sweetness!
363
00:16:15,990 --> 00:16:17,910
That's the jab-a-tose.
364
00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:19,990
Ocean water enters the machine,
365
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,120
And when it comes out,
it tastes normal
366
00:16:22,210 --> 00:16:24,870
But still has more salt
than all the glasses
367
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:26,130
In margaritaville.
368
00:16:26,250 --> 00:16:28,920
Oh, my god.
Lifeboat is built on a lie,
369
00:16:29,010 --> 00:16:31,130
And persephone is a fraud.
370
00:16:31,260 --> 00:16:32,970
But her merch is...
371
00:16:33,180 --> 00:16:34,430
[sniffles] solid.
372
00:16:34,510 --> 00:16:36,010
[peter coyote]
action was needed,
373
00:16:36,140 --> 00:16:38,720
And island time was running out.
374
00:16:38,810 --> 00:16:40,260
The fateful demo day had arrived
375
00:16:40,350 --> 00:16:42,850
For lifeboat to
finally prove its concept
376
00:16:42,940 --> 00:16:44,770
At springfield elementary.
377
00:16:44,810 --> 00:16:47,190
The school's drinking water
had been replaced
378
00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:48,860
With lifeboat liquid--
379
00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:51,320
Jab-a-tose-infused salt water.
380
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:54,610
Lifeboat employees had drunk
the kool-aid,
381
00:16:54,740 --> 00:16:57,490
And now it was being served up
to the children.
382
00:16:57,620 --> 00:16:58,570
Mr. Burns!
383
00:16:58,740 --> 00:17:00,080
The lifeboat water isn't safe.
384
00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,450
It's just super sweetened
ocean brine.
385
00:17:02,580 --> 00:17:05,410
Nonsense.
My wife is a beautiful genius,
386
00:17:05,580 --> 00:17:07,420
Who succeeds at
everything she touches.
387
00:17:07,540 --> 00:17:10,040
And everything she says
makes perfect sense.
388
00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:13,380
The wheel of tomorrow is
an aqua-circle.
389
00:17:13,550 --> 00:17:15,090
Let's make it rain.
390
00:17:15,260 --> 00:17:16,590
-[cheering]
-buddy, buddy, buddy.
391
00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:19,720
What you're feeling towards
that lady is fresh love,
392
00:17:19,850 --> 00:17:20,890
Not married love.
393
00:17:20,970 --> 00:17:22,220
But we are married.
394
00:17:22,350 --> 00:17:25,180
Yes, but the married love
hasn't kicked in yet.
395
00:17:25,310 --> 00:17:27,980
When it does, you'll see
your spouse's flaws
396
00:17:28,060 --> 00:17:31,690
In 4k hdtv
you can never turn off.
397
00:17:31,780 --> 00:17:33,280
What are you driving at?
398
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:36,860
I think you need to look at
your wife with marriage eyes.
399
00:17:36,990 --> 00:17:38,280
Water is the original crypto.
400
00:17:38,410 --> 00:17:41,120
Every drop is encoded
on the biological blockchain,
401
00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:44,750
And we are the aquanauts
of the potable future.
402
00:17:44,790 --> 00:17:47,160
This is wet 3.0!
403
00:17:47,210 --> 00:17:51,030
I don't understand
a thing she's ever said.
404
00:17:51,130 --> 00:17:53,130
Now you're married.
405
00:17:53,260 --> 00:17:55,420
And since you're seeing things
clearly...
406
00:17:56,720 --> 00:17:59,760
Oh, dear. Those children are
going to drink poison.
407
00:17:59,850 --> 00:18:01,470
And the bad news is...
408
00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:03,010
I'm going to be liable.
409
00:18:03,180 --> 00:18:05,220
[echoing]
liable!
410
00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:10,520
[gasping]
411
00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:12,360
[peter coyote]
that is what would have happened
412
00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:15,400
Had homer not
turned the valve off.
413
00:18:17,820 --> 00:18:20,610
Sorry, we only put that in there
for the trailer.
414
00:18:20,740 --> 00:18:22,740
Do you know how hard it is
to get people to watch
415
00:18:22,870 --> 00:18:26,120
A documentary that's not about
a small-town murder?
416
00:18:26,210 --> 00:18:27,660
Please, honey, come clean.
417
00:18:27,750 --> 00:18:30,250
Your miracle invention is
nothing but claptrap.
418
00:18:30,290 --> 00:18:33,540
If you can just admit that,
maybe we have a chance.
419
00:18:33,630 --> 00:18:37,800
Babe, the underlying imaginary
technology still works.
420
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:39,300
[peter coyote]
and in that moment,
421
00:18:39,340 --> 00:18:43,470
This unlikely and super gross
love affair died.
422
00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:47,600
Yes, I was besotted,
blind to her machinations.
423
00:18:47,730 --> 00:18:49,230
She cost me billions.
424
00:18:49,350 --> 00:18:51,190
It wasn't that she was evil,
I love evil.
425
00:18:51,310 --> 00:18:54,270
It's that she still insists
she's good.
426
00:18:55,730 --> 00:18:58,190
[peter coyote]
lifeboat had finally
hit the reef,
427
00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:00,400
Drowning its investors
and employees
428
00:19:00,450 --> 00:19:03,870
In poisoned water and
counterparty risk lawsuits.
429
00:19:03,950 --> 00:19:06,450
But to this day,
persephone has refused
430
00:19:06,620 --> 00:19:08,290
To admit any failure.
431
00:19:08,330 --> 00:19:11,540
Testing showed your de-salinator
did absolutely nothing,
432
00:19:11,630 --> 00:19:14,290
Your company is bankrupt,
and in the divorce,
433
00:19:14,460 --> 00:19:17,380
Mr. Burns somehow got
your high school friends.
434
00:19:20,630 --> 00:19:22,050
What happens from here?
435
00:19:22,140 --> 00:19:23,510
Well, christiane amanpour,
as you say,
436
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:25,680
Things have never
looked better for the company.
437
00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:26,720
I didn't say that.
438
00:19:26,890 --> 00:19:28,060
The reality is,
439
00:19:28,180 --> 00:19:30,270
-You're in jail.
-[heavy door closes]
440
00:19:30,350 --> 00:19:32,020
Christiane,
have I ever told you about
441
00:19:32,060 --> 00:19:35,310
My grandfather's experience
on a lifeboat?
442
00:19:36,150 --> 00:19:37,400
Even that was a lie.
443
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:39,190
Her grandfather wasn't
in the war,
444
00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:40,570
And he didn't die on a lifeboat.
445
00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:43,910
He's a cpa whose hobby is
fixing british spellings
446
00:19:44,030 --> 00:19:45,620
On wikipedia.
447
00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:52,460
[sighs] not only did I miss out
448
00:19:52,580 --> 00:19:54,540
On once-in-a-lifetime
start-up riches,
449
00:19:54,630 --> 00:19:56,960
But I lost the most amazing
woman I ever met.
450
00:19:57,000 --> 00:20:00,260
I think, in a few more months
she might've even slept with me.
451
00:20:00,380 --> 00:20:01,670
It's great to meet you in person
452
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:04,840
After seeing so much footage
of you in our documentary
453
00:20:04,930 --> 00:20:07,510
The man who sold
horse meat sandwiches.
454
00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:10,720
Anything else to add?
455
00:20:10,890 --> 00:20:11,770
Just this.
456
00:20:11,890 --> 00:20:13,230
Don't feel sorry for me.
457
00:20:13,310 --> 00:20:15,270
Time to rebuild and reconquer.
458
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,900
If I know one thing
about myself,
459
00:20:18,030 --> 00:20:21,610
Montgomery burns always
bounces back.
460
00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:29,120
♪ this is my fight song ♪
461
00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:31,910
♪ take back my life song ♪
462
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:37,170
-[crying]
-♪ prove I'm all right song ♪
463
00:20:37,210 --> 00:20:39,710
♪ my power's turned on ♪
464
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,050
♪ starting right now
I'll be strong ♪
465
00:20:42,220 --> 00:20:44,720
♪ I'll play my fight song. ♪
466
00:20:48,100 --> 00:20:51,350
We also have over 90 hours of
them talking about umbrellas.
467
00:20:51,350 --> 00:20:52,890
Maybe that could be
a documentary, too.
468
00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:56,140
I once brought an umbrella
into the shower.
469
00:20:56,230 --> 00:20:58,230
-How did you get clean?
-I didn't,
470
00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:01,400
But at least I didn't
have to take off my clothes.
471
00:21:01,570 --> 00:21:04,740
As soon as I open my umbrella,
it stops raining.
472
00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:06,410
You need a sunroof on it.
473
00:21:06,530 --> 00:21:09,530
What about a giant umbrella
you keep in the trunk?
474
00:21:09,660 --> 00:21:13,500
Sounds like you're talking about
an "umbrellaphant."
475
00:21:13,540 --> 00:21:15,290
Can we get back to work?
476
00:21:15,330 --> 00:21:17,330
Wait. I like the sound of that.
477
00:21:17,420 --> 00:21:18,420
Get back.
478
00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:20,540
I saw an umbrellaphant
at the circus.
479
00:21:20,670 --> 00:21:22,500
He was working for peanuts.
480
00:21:22,550 --> 00:21:24,760
Captioning sponsored by
20th century fox television
481
00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:26,630
And fox broadcasting company
482
00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:28,550
And toyota.
483
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,220
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh
access.Wgbh.Org
484
00:21:31,270 --> 00:21:32,510
Shh!
36901
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