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1
00:00:03,153 --> 00:00:05,660
So now you and Ben are officially donezo,
2
00:00:06,033 --> 00:00:07,706
any plans to get back in the saddle?
3
00:00:07,954 --> 00:00:11,669
My masseur is single and
he has a beautiful ponytail.
4
00:00:11,670 --> 00:00:14,675
Oh, no, you know, I think
once you get divorced,
5
00:00:14,676 --> 00:00:17,712
that part of you that
notices men just kind of dies.
6
00:00:17,932 --> 00:00:19,384
- Thanks, Bill.
- You got it.
7
00:00:19,384 --> 00:00:21,094
Like how after I graduated medical school,
8
00:00:21,095 --> 00:00:22,155
I just forgot everything.
9
00:00:22,155 --> 00:00:25,341
See, I don't know, 'cause when
Mother divorced Sheik Abdul,
10
00:00:25,437 --> 00:00:27,331
she swore she would never date again.
11
00:00:27,356 --> 00:00:29,047
Two weeks later, she meets Larry King.
12
00:00:30,023 --> 00:00:32,134
- Whoa, who 'dat?
- Yikes.
13
00:00:32,356 --> 00:00:36,156
Schwing. Um, hello. Hi, sir.
14
00:00:36,156 --> 00:00:37,909
We couldn't help but
notice that you look lost.
15
00:00:37,910 --> 00:00:39,996
- Can we help you find something?
- Or someone?
16
00:00:39,997 --> 00:00:42,877
Oh, Mormon missionaries.
Thanks, but I'm not interested.
17
00:00:42,878 --> 00:00:45,090
Ha, ha, no, no, no, no,
no, no, we're not religious.
18
00:00:45,091 --> 00:00:46,440
We just thought you might be lost,
19
00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:48,310
and we'd be sad if anything
were to happen to you.
20
00:00:48,335 --> 00:00:49,163
Why?
21
00:00:49,188 --> 00:00:50,718
Because you're handsome,
man. What's your deal?
22
00:00:50,719 --> 00:00:52,971
I'm Jeremy. This is my
single friend, Mindy.
23
00:00:52,996 --> 00:00:54,194
Hi.
24
00:00:54,583 --> 00:00:56,586
Hey, I'm not lost, I'm David.
25
00:00:56,587 --> 00:00:58,236
Sorry, I was checking out this building.
26
00:00:58,424 --> 00:01:00,382
I'm a big architecture buff.
27
00:01:00,413 --> 00:01:02,666
Oh, no way! Me too! You know
this building was actually
28
00:01:02,667 --> 00:01:05,380
built as a brothel, and
when it rains, you can still
29
00:01:05,381 --> 00:01:06,733
catch a whiff of parfum.
30
00:01:06,766 --> 00:01:08,894
I too love architecture.
My favorite building?
31
00:01:08,895 --> 00:01:10,522
The M&M building in Times Square.
32
00:01:10,523 --> 00:01:12,401
- Cool, that's a nice one.
- Yeah.
33
00:01:12,402 --> 00:01:14,321
We actually work here at
Schulman and Associates.
34
00:01:14,322 --> 00:01:15,700
We're doctors, but don't be intimidated!
35
00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:16,988
I'm not that smart.
36
00:01:17,621 --> 00:01:21,377
Wow, funny and friendly. Are
you sure you're New Yorkers?
37
00:01:21,378 --> 00:01:22,491
[POLITE LAUGHTER]
38
00:01:23,132 --> 00:01:25,761
You know, I have a patient right now,
39
00:01:25,762 --> 00:01:28,141
but if you're interested, maybe
we could go get lunch sometime.
40
00:01:28,191 --> 00:01:29,710
Yeah. Yeah, let's do it.
41
00:01:29,735 --> 00:01:31,529
Perfect! I mean, I'm on a broth cleanse,
42
00:01:31,563 --> 00:01:33,023
but I could just bring the Thermos.
43
00:01:33,064 --> 00:01:34,775
Actually, you know what? Sod
it, I deserve to be naughty.
44
00:01:34,776 --> 00:01:36,445
No, Jeremy, you can't go, 'cause remember
45
00:01:36,446 --> 00:01:38,031
you have to get your shin looked at?
46
00:01:38,032 --> 00:01:39,993
I don't know what you mean. [YELPS]
47
00:01:39,994 --> 00:01:42,395
- I'm good with the broth.
- So it'll just be you and me.
48
00:01:42,420 --> 00:01:45,425
[THEME MUSIC]
49
00:01:47,012 --> 00:01:49,131
Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
50
00:01:49,615 --> 00:01:51,374
He hasn't expressed romantic interest,
51
00:01:51,401 --> 00:01:53,488
but I feel it could last forever.
52
00:01:54,229 --> 00:01:57,789
Wow. Not cool. I just read
the RSVP's for mine and Anna's
53
00:01:57,790 --> 00:02:00,762
housewarming party; all
of you said you're coming.
54
00:02:00,815 --> 00:02:03,320
I have never been more offended.
55
00:02:03,393 --> 00:02:04,365
[SCOFFS] Why?
56
00:02:04,409 --> 00:02:06,359
Because clearly a prank is afoot.
57
00:02:06,553 --> 00:02:08,180
I know none of you are coming.
58
00:02:08,181 --> 00:02:09,746
Look, I know the theme of the party...
59
00:02:09,766 --> 00:02:11,769
come dressed as your favorite
Meryl Streep character...
60
00:02:11,770 --> 00:02:14,136
is a tad outr�. Fine, I am a tad outr�,
61
00:02:14,166 --> 00:02:16,044
but this is just cruel. And you know what?
62
00:02:16,045 --> 00:02:17,965
Sod it. Sod you, the party's cancelled.
63
00:02:17,966 --> 00:02:20,210
- [ALL EXCLAIMING]
- What? Jeremy!
64
00:02:20,250 --> 00:02:21,877
We're all coming to your party.
65
00:02:21,878 --> 00:02:23,548
If you cancel it, I will kill myself.
66
00:02:23,573 --> 00:02:24,793
What are you talking about?
67
00:02:24,830 --> 00:02:26,707
Are you kidding me? I have
the chance to express myself
68
00:02:26,709 --> 00:02:29,589
through a strong female
character? I live for this.
69
00:02:29,647 --> 00:02:30,747
Really?
70
00:02:30,747 --> 00:02:32,791
Yeah, Dr. Reed. You picked
the one actress in America
71
00:02:32,792 --> 00:02:36,025
that everyone can get behind.
And she is so good at accents.
72
00:02:36,050 --> 00:02:40,550
She's all, "If I must, I chose my son."
73
00:02:41,353 --> 00:02:43,856
She's so talented, I
can ignore her politics.
74
00:02:43,857 --> 00:02:46,237
And she seems genuinely
excited to be nominated
75
00:02:46,238 --> 00:02:48,616
for awards, even the Golden Globes.
76
00:02:48,617 --> 00:02:51,747
Yeah, she actually attends the
ceremony, unlike some people,
77
00:02:51,748 --> 00:02:53,259
Maggie Smith!
78
00:02:53,375 --> 00:02:55,378
Darling, it's real. They
were all just discussing
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00:02:55,378 --> 00:02:56,796
the costumes they were going to wear.
80
00:02:56,797 --> 00:02:58,550
Guys, I'm so sorry. I'm floored.
81
00:02:58,551 --> 00:03:00,313
I'll see you at the party.
82
00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:01,931
[WHISPERING] So, anyways...
83
00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:03,032
Huh?
84
00:03:03,522 --> 00:03:04,927
Still not a prank!
85
00:03:05,276 --> 00:03:07,822
I know that. I know.
86
00:03:12,374 --> 00:03:14,627
So how's NYU going for you, Micaela?
87
00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:16,171
Is your roommate still stealing your yogurt
88
00:03:16,172 --> 00:03:17,465
out of your mini-fridge?
89
00:03:17,466 --> 00:03:19,948
Nope, she did semester at
sea, and the boat disappeared.
90
00:03:19,990 --> 00:03:22,410
Well, the Lord works in mysterious ways.
91
00:03:22,955 --> 00:03:24,469
Now, so what can I do for you today?
92
00:03:24,469 --> 00:03:26,555
I was actually thinking
about getting an IUD.
93
00:03:26,556 --> 00:03:30,271
Oh, Micaela, I don't know.
I don't recommend an IUD
94
00:03:30,272 --> 00:03:32,109
unless a patient really
doesn't want to have children
95
00:03:32,110 --> 00:03:33,596
for a very long time.
96
00:03:33,608 --> 00:03:36,075
There's no way I'm bringing
a child into this crazy world.
97
00:03:36,135 --> 00:03:37,809
Did you know that all the bees are dying?
98
00:03:37,810 --> 00:03:38,982
And no one knows why?
99
00:03:38,982 --> 00:03:40,526
Oh, sure. Everything's disappearing.
100
00:03:40,527 --> 00:03:42,530
Icebergs, bees, our civil liberties,
101
00:03:42,531 --> 00:03:44,408
but this is a serious procedure.
102
00:03:44,409 --> 00:03:46,246
I think you should think
about it, and if you discuss
103
00:03:46,247 --> 00:03:47,999
this with your mother and your father...
104
00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:49,460
You know what? A lot
of my friends are going
105
00:03:49,461 --> 00:03:51,756
to this cool female doctor downtown.
106
00:03:51,757 --> 00:03:53,635
Maybe she'll be a little less judgmental.
107
00:03:53,636 --> 00:03:56,182
Judgmental? Well, my father was a judge,
108
00:03:56,183 --> 00:03:57,518
and my mother was mental.
109
00:03:57,519 --> 00:03:58,812
- [SCOFFS]
- So...
110
00:03:58,813 --> 00:04:00,010
Karen!
111
00:04:00,030 --> 00:04:02,242
- Oh, hey, Dr. Kimball-Kinney.
- Hello.
112
00:04:02,341 --> 00:04:04,302
Hey, I finished polishing your rifle.
113
00:04:04,303 --> 00:04:06,932
- It was loaded, by the way.
- Wonderful.
114
00:04:06,933 --> 00:04:08,977
Now, Karen, would you be a doll,
115
00:04:08,978 --> 00:04:11,441
and tell me where you forwarded
Micaela Kellerman's file to?
116
00:04:11,442 --> 00:04:13,946
The one that dumped you
for a different doctor
117
00:04:13,947 --> 00:04:15,908
because you were being too patronizing?
118
00:04:15,909 --> 00:04:17,745
Patronizing? Sweetie,
119
00:04:17,746 --> 00:04:19,791
are you sure you understand that big word?
120
00:04:19,792 --> 00:04:21,753
I'm sorry, but I can't give you
121
00:04:21,754 --> 00:04:24,592
her new doctor's information due
to the Patient's Bill of Rights,
122
00:04:24,593 --> 00:04:27,557
a copy of which I have posted right here.
123
00:04:27,558 --> 00:04:30,563
Ah, Karen, I noticed that
the magazines in the lunchroom
124
00:04:30,564 --> 00:04:32,316
are all out of order.
125
00:04:32,317 --> 00:04:35,039
Code red! We got a code red!
126
00:04:35,786 --> 00:04:37,142
Let's see this...
127
00:04:37,831 --> 00:04:40,331
Patient file... sent to...
128
00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:42,374
Dr. Mary Hernandez.
129
00:04:43,468 --> 00:04:46,791
The Lower East Side?
Micaela could be in danger!
130
00:04:47,183 --> 00:04:49,382
Some of our most lecherous
young actors live there!
131
00:04:51,943 --> 00:04:54,071
Wow, so you're a mechanical engineer.
132
00:04:54,072 --> 00:04:55,616
I don't know anything about that.
133
00:04:55,617 --> 00:04:57,244
Are you like Hugh Jackman in "Real Steel?"
134
00:04:57,245 --> 00:05:00,291
Yes, I create robots
that then box each other
135
00:05:00,292 --> 00:05:02,655
for human entertainment.
It's really fulfilling.
136
00:05:03,591 --> 00:05:05,511
- So you're an OBGYN?
- Mm-hmm.
137
00:05:05,512 --> 00:05:07,180
That was my dream job when I was 14.
138
00:05:07,181 --> 00:05:08,892
- Do you like it?
- I love it.
139
00:05:08,893 --> 00:05:11,230
I mean, I get to bring
life into this world.
140
00:05:11,231 --> 00:05:12,859
And I also get to keep up to date on
141
00:05:12,860 --> 00:05:15,337
all of the new pubic hair trends, so...
142
00:05:15,699 --> 00:05:18,286
Um, what about your co-workers?
What are they like?
143
00:05:18,287 --> 00:05:19,863
Oh, the other doctors I work with?
144
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,712
They're fine. I want to
find out more about your job.
145
00:05:21,737 --> 00:05:23,949
Right, but it's not just
doctors at your practice right?
146
00:05:23,950 --> 00:05:26,766
Like, there's nurses and
there's receptionists.
147
00:05:26,794 --> 00:05:28,672
- What about them?
- I don't know why you care,
148
00:05:28,673 --> 00:05:30,425
but if you really want to meet them,
149
00:05:30,426 --> 00:05:32,136
one of my co-workers is
having a party tonight.
150
00:05:32,137 --> 00:05:33,335
You could come with me.
151
00:05:33,683 --> 00:05:35,101
Absolutely. I'm there.
152
00:05:35,102 --> 00:05:37,398
Really? Guess it's a date.
153
00:05:37,399 --> 00:05:39,275
Just so you know, I'm on medication
154
00:05:39,276 --> 00:05:40,946
for a bladder infection,
so who knows what'll happen
155
00:05:40,947 --> 00:05:42,015
when I drink?
156
00:05:43,326 --> 00:05:45,831
Thank you for coming downtown
with me today, Morgan.
157
00:05:45,832 --> 00:05:48,271
I get nervous going south
of 72nd Street alone.
158
00:05:49,004 --> 00:05:51,341
Or North of 80th. Pardon me.
159
00:05:51,368 --> 00:05:52,548
You want to jump in real quick?
160
00:05:52,585 --> 00:05:54,922
Oh. Pardon me, I'm
sorry. Just for a moment.
161
00:05:54,922 --> 00:05:56,549
- Sorry.
- Pardon me, Miss.
162
00:05:56,550 --> 00:05:58,803
Excuse me, Miss? Just one quick...
163
00:05:58,804 --> 00:06:00,766
- Oh! Jesus! Oh!
- Are you all right?
164
00:06:00,767 --> 00:06:03,230
- No!
- Hola, little amigo.
165
00:06:04,071 --> 00:06:06,596
Hey, I like your necklace. Muy brillante.
166
00:06:06,618 --> 00:06:08,121
Do you want something?
167
00:06:08,122 --> 00:06:10,366
- Uh, si.
- You're weird.
168
00:06:10,432 --> 00:06:11,730
Do you want me to handle this young man?
169
00:06:11,789 --> 00:06:14,276
No. Listen, I'll buy you a horchata
170
00:06:14,276 --> 00:06:16,947
if you tell me where I can
find Dr. Mary Hernandez.
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00:06:16,948 --> 00:06:18,564
I'm Dr. Mary Hernandez.
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00:06:20,330 --> 00:06:23,125
Dr. Hernandez, when I saw that my patient,
173
00:06:23,126 --> 00:06:25,631
Micaela Kellerman, decided
to leave me and seek care
174
00:06:25,632 --> 00:06:27,593
with you, I noticed a couple of red flags.
175
00:06:27,594 --> 00:06:30,474
He's referring to your
gender and your race.
176
00:06:30,475 --> 00:06:32,018
Oh, my. I can't imagine why a patient
177
00:06:32,019 --> 00:06:33,355
would ever want to leave you.
178
00:06:33,355 --> 00:06:36,615
No, madam. He didn't mean
that, he's overstimulated.
179
00:06:36,727 --> 00:06:38,104
He just took his first taxi ride.
180
00:06:38,105 --> 00:06:39,774
It's true. It was amazing.
181
00:06:39,775 --> 00:06:42,362
Taxi TV. Michael Strahan was talking to me,
182
00:06:42,363 --> 00:06:43,325
like we're best friends.
183
00:06:43,356 --> 00:06:45,316
Okay, I don't want to be
rude, but I'm very busy,
184
00:06:45,365 --> 00:06:47,952
and this seems like nonsense.
185
00:06:47,985 --> 00:06:51,450
Dr. Hernandez, my patient
Micaela was upset with me
186
00:06:51,451 --> 00:06:53,662
the other day, and rashly
decided to leave me.
187
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,833
The thing is, she's a
nice girl from a nice home,
188
00:06:55,834 --> 00:06:57,169
and I think our practice would be
189
00:06:57,170 --> 00:06:58,839
much more appropriate for her.
190
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,219
Dr. Kimball-Kinney, I know that
191
00:07:01,220 --> 00:07:03,515
the Five Points Community
Clinic doesn't offer
192
00:07:03,516 --> 00:07:06,855
the plush creature comforts
of your Park Avenue practice.
193
00:07:06,856 --> 00:07:08,442
Yes, we don't have a lot of money.
194
00:07:08,443 --> 00:07:11,191
Yes, our posters are a little outdated.
195
00:07:11,783 --> 00:07:14,370
So you agree with me then, well, fantastic.
196
00:07:14,371 --> 00:07:16,205
Tell Micaela I'll see her in two weeks.
197
00:07:16,245 --> 00:07:19,320
Why would I ever send her back?
198
00:07:19,380 --> 00:07:22,134
We're the highest-rated women's
healthcare clinic in the city!
199
00:07:22,712 --> 00:07:24,046
Including yours.
200
00:07:24,046 --> 00:07:27,594
That can't be possible.
I suspect voter fraud.
201
00:07:27,596 --> 00:07:30,192
So while I can't offer her spa water
202
00:07:30,233 --> 00:07:32,421
or condescending, patriarchal advice,
203
00:07:32,446 --> 00:07:34,602
what I can provide her with is
204
00:07:34,627 --> 00:07:36,649
the best women's healthcare in Manhattan,
205
00:07:36,649 --> 00:07:39,843
and we do it for free. �Comprende, cabron?
206
00:07:39,843 --> 00:07:42,054
Yeah, we do. Oh!
207
00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:44,238
The Chupa Chups are for the kids.
208
00:07:49,208 --> 00:07:52,794
Oh! Karen! "The Devil Wears Prada."
209
00:07:52,827 --> 00:07:55,270
- I love it.
- Thanks. Who are you?
210
00:07:55,303 --> 00:07:57,850
Oh, I'm Karen Blickson
from "Out of Africa."
211
00:07:57,851 --> 00:08:00,564
I already owned the costume.
My family colonized Zimbabwe.
212
00:08:00,565 --> 00:08:03,945
If you like Anna's
costume, you will love mine.
213
00:08:04,375 --> 00:08:05,273
Whoa.
214
00:08:05,295 --> 00:08:07,730
Jeremy, darling, you
look even more wonderful
215
00:08:07,755 --> 00:08:09,382
- than your sketches.
- Thank you.
216
00:08:09,383 --> 00:08:12,639
Oh damn, Dr. Reed. Who are you?
217
00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:13,762
Surely you're joking.
218
00:08:13,969 --> 00:08:16,681
I'm obviously Florence Foster Jenkins.
219
00:08:17,065 --> 00:08:19,455
[SINGS AN ARPEGGIO]
220
00:08:19,904 --> 00:08:22,577
- Oh, come on. You said it was...
- That was spot on.
221
00:08:24,831 --> 00:08:27,641
Francesca, "Bridges of
Madison County," right?
222
00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,187
Dr. Kimball-Kinney.
223
00:08:30,212 --> 00:08:33,724
- Oh yes, of course, Dr. Gonzalez.
- Hernandez.
224
00:08:33,749 --> 00:08:35,047
What are you doing here?
225
00:08:35,047 --> 00:08:36,883
Oh, dear, you're not
catering on the side, are you?
226
00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,887
Because your patients don't have any money?
227
00:08:38,888 --> 00:08:42,455
No, Anna invited me. We went
to medical school together.
228
00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:43,990
You went to Harvard Medical School?
229
00:08:43,991 --> 00:08:46,015
The Florida State University of the North?
230
00:08:46,487 --> 00:08:48,824
Then why are you working in a
clinic with a metal detector?
231
00:08:48,825 --> 00:08:51,079
It's not great. I can't
wear an underwire bra
232
00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:53,208
without setting it off, but it's worth it.
233
00:08:53,209 --> 00:08:55,212
I get to help patients in need.
234
00:08:55,213 --> 00:08:57,008
I'm guessing that you
don't understand that.
235
00:08:57,009 --> 00:08:59,607
Well, that is not true.
I am very altruistic.
236
00:08:59,722 --> 00:09:01,016
If a patient doesn't have insurance,
237
00:09:01,017 --> 00:09:02,363
I make sure they're very rich
238
00:09:02,408 --> 00:09:03,928
before I make them pay out of pocket.
239
00:09:03,965 --> 00:09:05,890
Wow, that is truly moving.
240
00:09:06,051 --> 00:09:08,095
I should go before I start to cry.
241
00:09:08,528 --> 00:09:11,907
I've been up in New York long
enough to recognize sarcasm,
242
00:09:11,932 --> 00:09:13,727
and to think just a moment ago,
243
00:09:13,728 --> 00:09:15,480
I was considering asking you to dinner.
244
00:09:15,512 --> 00:09:17,238
[GASPS] Oh, no!
245
00:09:17,263 --> 00:09:19,766
Did I miss my chance to go out with you?
246
00:09:19,767 --> 00:09:23,554
Well, no, not quite,
but you... Oh, damn it.
247
00:09:24,696 --> 00:09:26,468
I feel like I'm in that "Seinfeld" program.
248
00:09:26,469 --> 00:09:29,390
- Wow, oh my gosh.
- ["MAMMA MIA" BY ABBA PLAYS]
249
00:09:29,391 --> 00:09:31,019
David, thank you so much for coming
250
00:09:31,020 --> 00:09:32,633
to this costume party with me.
251
00:09:32,658 --> 00:09:33,848
Of course.
252
00:09:33,926 --> 00:09:37,709
And might I add, you make
a stunning Julia Child.
253
00:09:37,738 --> 00:09:40,638
Oh thank you! I actually ate
an entire boeuf bourguignon
254
00:09:40,638 --> 00:09:42,014
in preparation for the role.
255
00:09:42,061 --> 00:09:43,914
- Oh, hi, Jody!
- Oh, hello.
256
00:09:43,966 --> 00:09:45,803
What Meryl Streep character are you?
257
00:09:45,844 --> 00:09:47,650
I'm Gail from "River Wild" obviously.
258
00:09:47,699 --> 00:09:48,889
Oh, I haven't seen it.
259
00:09:48,889 --> 00:09:51,225
Are you crazy? It's wonderful.
260
00:09:51,226 --> 00:09:53,563
You try to disarm
criminal madman Kevin Bacon
261
00:09:53,564 --> 00:09:55,490
while tackling category five rapids.
262
00:09:55,515 --> 00:09:56,647
It's not easy.
263
00:09:56,687 --> 00:09:59,153
David! You made it!
Fantastic! Don't go anywhere.
264
00:09:59,189 --> 00:10:01,400
I have three costume
changes throughout the night.
265
00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:03,111
[SINGS ARPEGGIOS OFF-KEY]
266
00:10:03,451 --> 00:10:05,413
Cool, now is this everybody?
267
00:10:05,414 --> 00:10:07,494
I thought you said your
entire office was coming.
268
00:10:07,495 --> 00:10:09,912
Uh, believe it or not,
those are the two coolest.
269
00:10:09,961 --> 00:10:11,566
- Do you want to meet them?
- Yeah.
270
00:10:11,591 --> 00:10:12,499
Okay.
271
00:10:12,527 --> 00:10:14,253
? Rock and roll will never die ?
272
00:10:14,278 --> 00:10:17,259
Hey, guys. For some reason,
David really wanted to meet you.
273
00:10:17,294 --> 00:10:19,297
David, this is Tamra and Morgan.
274
00:10:19,298 --> 00:10:21,845
Hey, I'm dressed as Meryl
from "Death Becomes Her."
275
00:10:21,906 --> 00:10:23,617
I was gonna do "Sophie's Choice,"
276
00:10:23,617 --> 00:10:25,453
but everyone kept saying I
looked too hot in the costume.
277
00:10:25,454 --> 00:10:27,959
Oh, yeah. I am Ricki from
"Ricki and the Flash."
278
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,279
My favorite movie. Yeah!
279
00:10:32,093 --> 00:10:34,638
Oh, Beverly, you must be the
Witch from "Into the Woods."
280
00:10:34,639 --> 00:10:36,601
Nah, I'm just Beverly.
281
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,726
I can't believe this is happening.
282
00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:41,498
You're Beverly?
283
00:10:41,523 --> 00:10:43,539
- Who's askin'?
- I am.
284
00:10:44,738 --> 00:10:45,948
I'm your son.
285
00:10:45,949 --> 00:10:47,994
[MORGAN STRUMS DRAMATICALLY]
286
00:10:48,489 --> 00:10:49,595
Sorry.
287
00:10:52,972 --> 00:10:55,385
Oh my God! Beverly, David's your son?
288
00:10:55,438 --> 00:10:57,650
It's true. She left me in a basket in front
289
00:10:57,651 --> 00:11:00,614
of a Jazzercise studio! It was 1982.
290
00:11:00,615 --> 00:11:02,743
Hold on! I'm so sorry.
The similarities between
291
00:11:02,744 --> 00:11:05,374
this situation and the plot
of "Ricki and the Flash,"
292
00:11:05,375 --> 00:11:08,834
which, once again, is my
favorite movie, are stunning.
293
00:11:08,882 --> 00:11:12,174
It's a good story, but how do
I know I'm really your mother?
294
00:11:12,215 --> 00:11:14,008
Well, I was left with a cassette tape,
295
00:11:14,009 --> 00:11:15,970
- Oh, quiet!
- Everybody be quiet! Be quiet!
296
00:11:15,971 --> 00:11:18,016
- Listen! There's a cassette!
- Dr. K, come here please.
297
00:11:18,017 --> 00:11:19,600
- Come here, listen.
- Turn the music down, Mike.
298
00:11:19,673 --> 00:11:23,419
Hi, whoever finds this baby,
please take good care of him.
299
00:11:23,546 --> 00:11:25,758
He likes a little Jim Beam in his bottle.
300
00:11:25,759 --> 00:11:28,555
Don't come looking for me,
you'll never find me.
301
00:11:28,589 --> 00:11:29,989
Bus leaving for New York City!
302
00:11:30,051 --> 00:11:32,556
Okay, I gotta go. Bye, little David.
303
00:11:32,557 --> 00:11:35,645
Have a nice life. Love, your mom, Beverly.
304
00:11:35,646 --> 00:11:38,316
- Oh, come on.
- Okay, what do we know?
305
00:11:38,317 --> 00:11:39,579
It's clearly Beverly.
306
00:11:39,615 --> 00:11:41,301
Play it back. I'm gonna really listen.
307
00:11:41,751 --> 00:11:44,539
Mom, is there somewhere we can
308
00:11:44,564 --> 00:11:46,359
speak in private?
309
00:11:47,313 --> 00:11:48,552
I have to go!
310
00:11:48,578 --> 00:11:50,889
Bev, Bev, Bev, Bev! Ah! She's my ride!
311
00:11:51,668 --> 00:11:52,625
[DOOR SLAMS]
312
00:11:53,708 --> 00:11:57,617
Wow, my mom just rejected me again.
313
00:11:57,642 --> 00:12:01,482
David, Beverly is an odd
duck. And I'm sure she wants
314
00:12:01,483 --> 00:12:02,810
to get to know you, too, you know?
315
00:12:02,854 --> 00:12:04,355
Hey, why don't you come
to the office tomorrow
316
00:12:04,356 --> 00:12:06,174
and talk to her one on one?
317
00:12:06,174 --> 00:12:07,482
Yeah, you're right, and maybe
I shouldn't have sprung it
318
00:12:07,507 --> 00:12:08,801
on her like this.
319
00:12:08,842 --> 00:12:10,344
What did I miss, everyone?
320
00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:14,222
Oh, it looks like a dingo ate my party.
321
00:12:18,392 --> 00:12:21,647
Beverly, what the hell?
You were awful last night!
322
00:12:21,648 --> 00:12:25,154
All right, all right.
You can have it all back.
323
00:12:25,155 --> 00:12:26,176
My God.
324
00:12:26,198 --> 00:12:29,738
My inhaler! I had to go
to the hospital last night.
325
00:12:29,785 --> 00:12:31,412
I'm allergic to wig glue.
326
00:12:31,413 --> 00:12:33,875
No, not that! I was obviously talking
327
00:12:33,876 --> 00:12:35,754
about the way you acted around David,
328
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,877
your hot and incredibly sweet son.
329
00:12:37,877 --> 00:12:39,880
Lucky for you, I used
my charm and good looks
330
00:12:39,881 --> 00:12:41,592
to get him to come here
today for a do-over.
331
00:12:41,593 --> 00:12:44,764
Why'd you do that? I don't want to see him!
332
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:46,602
I'll make him another cassette.
333
00:12:46,603 --> 00:12:48,814
Beverly, he's your son!
334
00:12:48,815 --> 00:12:50,801
He deserves a chance to talk to you.
335
00:12:50,828 --> 00:12:51,934
I don't know, guys.
336
00:12:51,975 --> 00:12:53,477
Maybe we're being too hard on her.
337
00:12:53,478 --> 00:12:55,597
I never knew my parents,
and I turned out...
338
00:12:56,274 --> 00:12:59,997
[COUGHING]
339
00:13:01,034 --> 00:13:02,870
Oh, my God, my Lego man!
340
00:13:02,917 --> 00:13:06,216
All right, all right! I'll talk to him.
341
00:13:06,252 --> 00:13:08,984
Thank God I'm wearing my fanciest outfit.
342
00:13:09,037 --> 00:13:12,773
Corduroy skirt and a bolo tie. Watch this.
343
00:13:13,254 --> 00:13:14,881
Your closet or mine?
344
00:13:14,882 --> 00:13:18,221
Mm, I don't know. I feel like a narc.
345
00:13:18,222 --> 00:13:19,558
Are you kidding me?
346
00:13:19,559 --> 00:13:21,687
That's Patricia Heaton for Kohl's!
347
00:13:21,688 --> 00:13:23,566
You've never worn
anything better than that.
348
00:13:23,567 --> 00:13:25,443
It is chic. No, but, Beverly,
349
00:13:25,444 --> 00:13:27,281
tell me the topics that
are safe to talk about.
350
00:13:27,282 --> 00:13:30,632
My cats, excitement for Christmas,
351
00:13:30,805 --> 00:13:31,921
Pier 1.
352
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,530
- Yes.
- Good, good, good.
353
00:13:33,531 --> 00:13:35,994
- How to throw a knife!
- No! No way.
354
00:13:35,995 --> 00:13:37,939
How to get a knife
through airport security.
355
00:13:37,939 --> 00:13:39,440
- No knives.
- I think we avoid the knives.
356
00:13:39,441 --> 00:13:41,340
Oh, hell. Then what's the point?
357
00:13:42,327 --> 00:13:44,163
Okay, Beverly, think about it this way.
358
00:13:44,163 --> 00:13:46,541
Wouldn't it be nice for
you to have a relationship
359
00:13:46,542 --> 00:13:48,545
with your own flesh and blood?
360
00:13:48,546 --> 00:13:52,470
I have often thought about
when I'm lying on my deathbed,
361
00:13:52,471 --> 00:13:54,767
who'll be there by my side,
362
00:13:54,768 --> 00:13:57,230
ready to smother me with a pillow?
363
00:13:57,231 --> 00:13:59,025
Guess I'd rather it be kin.
364
00:13:59,026 --> 00:14:01,656
Damn, Beverly, you look kind of okay.
365
00:14:01,657 --> 00:14:03,409
That son you abandoned is here.
366
00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:05,224
- Aah!
- Go, go!
367
00:14:06,307 --> 00:14:08,755
Anna, get your beautiful
head out of that magazine.
368
00:14:08,780 --> 00:14:10,825
I had a miserable time
at your party last night.
369
00:14:10,826 --> 00:14:13,329
Your Harvard classmate accosted me,
told me I was self-centered,
370
00:14:13,330 --> 00:14:15,626
didn't care about the less fortunate.
371
00:14:15,627 --> 00:14:18,005
- That sounds accurate.
- Could not have said it better.
372
00:14:18,006 --> 00:14:19,717
Why am I the bad guy?
373
00:14:19,718 --> 00:14:21,638
No one at Schulman's is philanthropic.
374
00:14:21,639 --> 00:14:23,307
Meanwhile, I helpfully tell
every woman in the office
375
00:14:23,308 --> 00:14:24,735
to smile more!
376
00:14:24,912 --> 00:14:26,623
You know, we used to have
this mobile medical van
377
00:14:26,624 --> 00:14:28,951
that we would drive into
low income neighborhoods,
378
00:14:29,152 --> 00:14:31,572
but it got impounded when I
parked in the Lincoln Tunnel.
379
00:14:31,573 --> 00:14:34,078
Well, damn it, let's go un-impound it!
380
00:14:34,079 --> 00:14:36,942
- Follow me, Morgan.
- I got a lot of work, but okay.
381
00:14:41,635 --> 00:14:43,188
Yeah, there she is.
382
00:14:43,915 --> 00:14:45,462
There's the old girl.
383
00:14:46,896 --> 00:14:49,516
Oh my God! Whoa, whoa! Geez Louise!
384
00:14:49,541 --> 00:14:51,270
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
385
00:14:51,770 --> 00:14:53,438
Are you sure that's safe in there, Morgan?
386
00:14:53,439 --> 00:14:54,483
All right, I'm gonna check it out.
387
00:14:54,508 --> 00:14:56,521
Yeah. I'll, uh...
388
00:14:56,547 --> 00:14:59,427
Oh my God, it's like a
raccoon cemetery in there.
389
00:14:59,428 --> 00:15:01,179
- Fabulous.
- Give me 15 minutes.
390
00:15:01,180 --> 00:15:02,726
Oh, my God.
391
00:15:04,346 --> 00:15:05,976
Come on. Come on, Bev.
392
00:15:08,146 --> 00:15:11,067
Dr. Reed, the hospital called.
Mrs. Morgenthal is fully dilated
393
00:15:11,068 --> 00:15:12,523
and ready for you.
394
00:15:12,523 --> 00:15:13,983
Just give her a copy of
"In Style" and tell her
395
00:15:13,984 --> 00:15:15,803
to take some deep breaths. Sit down.
396
00:15:15,828 --> 00:15:16,793
Please!
397
00:15:21,206 --> 00:15:24,703
Oh my God! They're
hugging! Jeremy, we did it!
398
00:15:26,617 --> 00:15:30,092
She was everything you could want in a mom!
399
00:15:30,117 --> 00:15:33,414
You know, lucid and warm, and you know,
400
00:15:33,415 --> 00:15:35,322
super excited about Christmas.
401
00:15:35,461 --> 00:15:38,674
She did talk about taxidermy
more than I would've imagined,
402
00:15:38,675 --> 00:15:40,846
but at least now I know how
much stuffing it would take
403
00:15:40,847 --> 00:15:42,767
to fill me, you know?
404
00:15:42,768 --> 00:15:44,603
Well, that is very surprising,
405
00:15:44,604 --> 00:15:48,027
because Beverly is a bit
of a controversial figure
406
00:15:48,028 --> 00:15:49,322
in this floor, so...
407
00:15:49,322 --> 00:15:51,033
What? She's the best. As a matter of fact,
408
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:52,827
can you give her my business card?
409
00:15:52,828 --> 00:15:54,957
She's gonna e-mail me
a list of mental illnesses
410
00:15:54,958 --> 00:15:57,294
and addictions I'm susceptible to, so...
411
00:15:57,295 --> 00:15:58,382
Yeah, no problem.
412
00:16:00,432 --> 00:16:02,479
Huh. Wallet's gone.
413
00:16:02,998 --> 00:16:05,829
Had it when I was talking to her.
414
00:16:07,481 --> 00:16:10,810
I was sitting with her,
and she patted me...
415
00:16:13,897 --> 00:16:16,450
Step right up, ladies and ladies!
416
00:16:16,475 --> 00:16:19,308
We got the Schulman and
Associates Mobile Health Unit!
417
00:16:19,333 --> 00:16:22,172
We got mammograms! We got pap smears!
418
00:16:22,173 --> 00:16:23,673
Come on, right in here.
419
00:16:23,985 --> 00:16:25,461
I don't know what we're doing wrong.
420
00:16:25,486 --> 00:16:27,364
How am I supposed to rub
our free, quality healthcare
421
00:16:27,365 --> 00:16:29,618
in Dr. Hernandez's pretty
face and ample bosom
422
00:16:29,619 --> 00:16:31,289
if we can't get any patients?
423
00:16:31,290 --> 00:16:33,334
Oh! Oh! Maybe I should
dress up like a woman,
424
00:16:33,335 --> 00:16:35,004
and I can stand behind you and
talk about what a great doctor
425
00:16:35,005 --> 00:16:36,799
you are? I can do that,
426
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,511
but it would be Ricki
from "Ricki and the Flash."
427
00:16:38,512 --> 00:16:40,432
It's my favorite movie. Have you seen that?
428
00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:42,060
Uh, excuse me, Madam. Are you in need
429
00:16:42,061 --> 00:16:43,563
of healthcare services today?
430
00:16:43,564 --> 00:16:45,312
That depends. Are you a doctor?
431
00:16:45,312 --> 00:16:48,118
All I see is two suspicious
men in front of a damaged van.
432
00:16:48,143 --> 00:16:49,395
I assure you I'm fully licensed,
433
00:16:49,396 --> 00:16:50,689
and I can see you right away.
434
00:16:50,690 --> 00:16:52,192
I just need some antibiotics.
435
00:16:52,193 --> 00:16:53,945
I have a really bad UTI.
436
00:16:53,946 --> 00:16:56,325
I held in my pee for
an entire women's march.
437
00:16:56,326 --> 00:16:58,162
I told people those were a bad idea.
438
00:16:58,163 --> 00:17:00,000
Come with me, I'll take care of you.
439
00:17:01,879 --> 00:17:05,259
Hey! What is wrong with you?
440
00:17:05,260 --> 00:17:07,180
How could you steal from your son?
441
00:17:07,181 --> 00:17:09,267
Yes, I take Leo's Halloween candy,
442
00:17:09,268 --> 00:17:10,614
but only after he's gone to bed!
443
00:17:10,614 --> 00:17:13,003
Well I don't know what to tell
you; I'm just a bad person.
444
00:17:13,028 --> 00:17:15,992
That's what everybody says,
and now I guess it's true.
445
00:17:15,993 --> 00:17:18,914
Hey, stop! Stop. That is not true.
446
00:17:18,915 --> 00:17:20,918
Remember the time I had too many margaritas
447
00:17:20,919 --> 00:17:23,165
at Jeremy's Miss America
pageant viewing party?
448
00:17:23,466 --> 00:17:25,219
And you took my car keys away from me.
449
00:17:25,220 --> 00:17:26,805
Yeah, but I made a copy of the keys,
450
00:17:26,806 --> 00:17:28,778
and I've been using your car ever since.
451
00:17:29,060 --> 00:17:32,190
Okay, well, what about
the time when I didn't know
452
00:17:32,191 --> 00:17:34,279
if I should leave Danny
or not, and you told me
453
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:37,452
I would be fine by myself?
That was good advice.
454
00:17:37,453 --> 00:17:40,249
I just told you that 'cause
I wanted him for myself.
455
00:17:40,250 --> 00:17:42,892
Okay, that is ridiculous,
Beverly. Sit down.
456
00:17:44,049 --> 00:17:45,582
- Sit!
- Okay!
457
00:17:47,222 --> 00:17:49,392
I don't get it. David said that you guys
458
00:17:49,393 --> 00:17:50,756
were having a great talk.
459
00:17:51,093 --> 00:17:53,442
Why would you ruin everything
by stealing his wallet?
460
00:17:53,443 --> 00:17:55,813
I don't know. Why did
I steal your identity?
461
00:17:55,813 --> 00:17:57,440
It's just who I am!
462
00:17:57,441 --> 00:17:59,111
Okay, I didn't know you had done that,
463
00:17:59,112 --> 00:18:01,745
but... can I tell you what I think?
464
00:18:02,451 --> 00:18:04,371
I think you stole his
wallet because you wanted
465
00:18:04,372 --> 00:18:05,697
to push him away,
466
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:09,047
because it was easier to do one bad thing
467
00:18:09,048 --> 00:18:11,427
than to have a relationship with your son
468
00:18:11,428 --> 00:18:12,805
for the rest of your life.
469
00:18:15,186 --> 00:18:18,221
Well, you may be right.
470
00:18:19,762 --> 00:18:21,660
But I also wanted a picture of him.
471
00:18:21,685 --> 00:18:24,479
He looks just like his dad, Tavis.
472
00:18:26,066 --> 00:18:28,078
Well, I think you'll feel a lot better
473
00:18:28,103 --> 00:18:30,190
if you go upstairs and
give this back to him.
474
00:18:31,109 --> 00:18:33,947
And put in a good word for
me, because you owe me now.
475
00:18:33,972 --> 00:18:36,313
Ha! My son can do better than you!
476
00:18:36,338 --> 00:18:39,097
Yeah, but he doesn't know that
yet. Just listen to what I say.
477
00:18:39,122 --> 00:18:41,288
All right, all right, I'm going, I'm going.
478
00:18:41,362 --> 00:18:44,116
Sofia, it's nice to meet
you. Here's your birth control
479
00:18:44,117 --> 00:18:46,454
for this month, and here's
your prescription for the rest.
480
00:18:46,455 --> 00:18:49,168
Oh, thanks, but uh... I
don't think I can afford this.
481
00:18:49,184 --> 00:18:50,688
I don't have health insurance.
482
00:18:50,713 --> 00:18:52,632
My word, I've been
hearing that a lot today.
483
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:54,677
I thought that was something
liberal media just made up,
484
00:18:54,678 --> 00:18:58,142
like police brutality, but don't
worry, the prescription's on us.
485
00:18:58,143 --> 00:19:00,981
You know what? Next month, you
come see me at this address.
486
00:19:00,982 --> 00:19:03,402
I'll give you your next
pack. Pharmaceutical companies
487
00:19:03,403 --> 00:19:04,945
give those away like candy.
488
00:19:05,355 --> 00:19:07,442
Thank you so much, Dr. Kimball-Kinney.
489
00:19:07,704 --> 00:19:10,358
Oh! [LAUGHS]
490
00:19:16,552 --> 00:19:19,641
Goodbye, Paula. Remember to
take all of your antibiotics.
491
00:19:19,641 --> 00:19:22,394
Otherwise humankind will
be wiped out by a super-bug.
492
00:19:23,212 --> 00:19:24,503
And enjoy this weather!
493
00:19:26,172 --> 00:19:27,841
- Woof!
- Right?
494
00:19:27,842 --> 00:19:28,990
What a day!
495
00:19:28,990 --> 00:19:31,535
Man, that was just like go, go, go!
496
00:19:31,536 --> 00:19:32,993
And now, here we are.
497
00:19:33,033 --> 00:19:36,200
And yet as tired as I am, I
haven't felt this fulfilled
498
00:19:36,274 --> 00:19:39,487
since I felled the wild
hog that gored Grandmother.
499
00:19:40,268 --> 00:19:41,260
Wow.
500
00:19:41,260 --> 00:19:43,230
Well, well, well, Dr. Hernandez.
501
00:19:43,238 --> 00:19:44,336
What a surprise.
502
00:19:44,361 --> 00:19:48,319
A surprise? Is it? You tagged
me in a taunting Instagram
503
00:19:48,481 --> 00:19:50,348
with the hashtag "Clinicfail,"
504
00:19:50,735 --> 00:19:54,500
# jodyhasmoregenerositythandrmary
hernandez.
505
00:19:55,226 --> 00:19:57,980
Real quick, hold on, that was me.
506
00:19:57,981 --> 00:20:00,403
I run the social media for
Schulman and Associates,
507
00:20:00,404 --> 00:20:03,282
so I apologize for... for tagging you.
508
00:20:03,283 --> 00:20:04,911
Look, Mary, I will admit that
509
00:20:04,912 --> 00:20:08,544
this mobile unit began
its mission out of spite,
510
00:20:08,545 --> 00:20:11,466
much like the space race
or a Taylor Swift video.
511
00:20:11,467 --> 00:20:13,429
Great, then you can just leave...
512
00:20:13,430 --> 00:20:14,723
But after helping all these women in need,
513
00:20:14,724 --> 00:20:16,267
something strange happened.
514
00:20:16,268 --> 00:20:18,062
I began to feel good about myself.
515
00:20:18,063 --> 00:20:20,317
- What?
- Yeah, I was as shocked as you.
516
00:20:20,318 --> 00:20:23,529
But yes, I enjoyed helping people for free!
517
00:20:24,092 --> 00:20:25,881
I'm sorry I was so dismissive.
518
00:20:25,906 --> 00:20:29,705
I've never seen him this
happy outside of Derby Day.
519
00:20:29,707 --> 00:20:30,658
Really?
520
00:20:31,711 --> 00:20:35,509
Well, I hate to admit it, but
having you here was a help.
521
00:20:35,510 --> 00:20:37,012
Well, then you wouldn't
mind if Morgan and I
522
00:20:37,013 --> 00:20:38,068
came back next week?
523
00:20:38,829 --> 00:20:41,933
Great, but maybe Morgan
524
00:20:42,173 --> 00:20:44,031
could not use our bathroom so much.
525
00:20:44,058 --> 00:20:46,050
- Ah, yeah.
- I'm sorry.
526
00:20:46,050 --> 00:20:47,970
I can't agree to that
at this moment in time.
527
00:20:47,971 --> 00:20:50,726
- He'll use it less.
- I won't use it less.
528
00:20:50,758 --> 00:20:52,531
I don't know. I don't know
how I'll feel next week.
529
00:20:52,556 --> 00:20:53,633
I'll make sure.
530
00:20:53,633 --> 00:20:55,513
Then I guess I'll see you next week.
531
00:20:55,538 --> 00:20:56,540
I look forward to it.
532
00:21:01,570 --> 00:21:05,251
Oh, oh, my gosh. Sparks!
533
00:21:05,251 --> 00:21:08,381
[IMITATING ELECTRICITY]
534
00:21:08,381 --> 00:21:10,593
It's like frickin' aluminum
foil in the microwave.
535
00:21:16,639 --> 00:21:19,143
Well, I hope you can come visit me
536
00:21:19,144 --> 00:21:20,896
on Long Island sometime.
537
00:21:20,897 --> 00:21:23,484
We'll be there. Sometimes just me alone.
538
00:21:23,485 --> 00:21:25,572
That's not gonna work.
You know I'm married,
539
00:21:25,573 --> 00:21:27,242
and I have two kids.
540
00:21:27,243 --> 00:21:29,956
What? You're married? Where's your ring?
541
00:21:29,957 --> 00:21:31,293
I'm allergic to metal.
542
00:21:31,464 --> 00:21:33,592
You have a metal allergy? What a crock!
543
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:37,153
What a waste of time! Ah, come on!
544
00:21:37,154 --> 00:21:39,001
- [SIGHS]
- Okay.
545
00:21:44,293 --> 00:21:46,548
Ah. [LAUGHTER]
546
00:21:49,947 --> 00:21:50,847
Bye.
547
00:21:52,967 --> 00:21:54,887
Oh, remember what I told you:
548
00:21:54,888 --> 00:21:57,463
The government's coming for our guns!
549
00:21:58,934 --> 00:22:00,277
I love you too, Mom.
550
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:04,176
Oh, wait. Still got it.
551
00:22:10,732 --> 00:22:13,802
Well, Beverly, looks
like even you are capable
552
00:22:13,836 --> 00:22:15,287
of being a good person sometimes.
553
00:22:16,110 --> 00:22:17,441
Aw, shut up.
554
00:22:19,530 --> 00:22:20,707
Thanks.
555
00:22:29,206 --> 00:22:30,366
Where's my purse?
556
00:22:30,750 --> 00:22:31,743
Go to bed.
557
00:22:31,793 --> 00:22:36,343
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