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1
00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:17,663
- Do you think
they'll come, sir?
2
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:20,666
- Oh, they'll come,
they'll come all right.
3
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,634
Here, stamp those and mail them.
4
00:05:02,761 --> 00:05:03,761
- It's ringing.
5
00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:06,549
Dear, would you walk
Myron the other way.
6
00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:08,763
My leg tends to look
like a tree in this fog.
7
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:15,475
- What a God forsaken
spot to get lost.
8
00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:18,440
- True, I saw a much better
spot a few miles back.
9
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:32,700
Hello?
10
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:34,792
Hello?
11
00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:36,788
- Good.
- Hello?
12
00:05:36,795 --> 00:05:39,878
- Tell them we're lost.
13
00:05:45,804 --> 00:05:46,714
- Nobody answered,
the phone went dead.
14
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:48,553
- Then why did you say hello?
15
00:05:48,557 --> 00:05:49,922
- Funny, I could have sworn...
16
00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:50,923
- What, Dicky?
17
00:05:50,934 --> 00:05:53,346
- Sounded as though
somebody snipped the wire.
18
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,640
- Really, what
did it sound like?
19
00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:58,023
- Snip.
20
00:06:04,656 --> 00:06:06,192
- Some bog, eh, Pop?
21
00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:08,440
- I've already heard
the weather report,
22
00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:10,237
and drive please.
23
00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:12,532
- Boy, it's as
thick as pea soup.
24
00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:14,906
Not a soul around for miles.
25
00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:16,122
Know what I think, Pop?
26
00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:18,208
Perfect place for a murder.
27
00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:22,375
- Conversation like
television set on honeymoon.
28
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,382
Unnecessary.
29
00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,293
- Hey, where we
going anyway, Pop?
30
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:02,878
And who is this
Mr. Twain who invited
31
00:07:02,881 --> 00:07:03,871
you for the weekend?
32
00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:05,793
And what did he mean
by dinner and a murder?
33
00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:09,088
- Questions are
like athlete's foot.
34
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:11,803
After a while, very irritating.
35
00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:16,137
To stop car, please.
36
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:16,975
- What's wrong?
37
00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:18,685
- Stop car please.
38
00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:23,147
To shut engine off, please.
39
00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:26,570
Listen.
40
00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:30,280
- I don't hear nothing,
what do you hear?
41
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,524
- Double negative and dog.
42
00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,572
- 50 it's a dog, so what?
43
00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:36,911
- If I'm not
mistaken, dog belong
44
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:38,872
to Mr. Dick Charleston.
45
00:07:38,875 --> 00:07:40,240
- Who's Dick Charleston?
46
00:07:40,251 --> 00:07:41,161
- I am, thank you.
47
00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:42,204
I say, you don't
happen to have seen
48
00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:43,212
a little white...
49
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:45,128
Wang.
50
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:46,542
- A white wang?
51
00:07:46,549 --> 00:07:48,631
- Good heavens, Sidney Wang.
52
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:50,421
What are you doing in
this godforsaken spot.
53
00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:52,465
- No doubt, same as you.
54
00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:55,555
Looking for bridge that
lead to home of host,
55
00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:57,390
Mr. Lionel Twain.
56
00:07:57,394 --> 00:07:58,725
- You, too, huh?
57
00:07:58,728 --> 00:08:01,470
Must be important to invite
two such eminent detectives?
58
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:05,475
- Excuse please, to
introduce Japanese son, Wai.
59
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,316
- Hi.
60
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,980
- Japanese, but I
thought surely you...
61
00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:10,275
- Mrs. Wang and I could
never have children.
62
00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:13,273
We adopted number three son.
63
00:08:13,284 --> 00:08:15,025
- My pleasure, be
careful on this road,
64
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:15,992
it's treacherous.
65
00:08:15,996 --> 00:08:18,033
- Treacherous road
like fresh mushroom.
66
00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:19,039
Must always.
67
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:20,868
Idiot.
68
00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:23,162
Not finished mushroom story.
69
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:24,284
You are idiot.
70
00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:32,880
- Well, I'm sorry, Mr. Perrier,
71
00:08:32,887 --> 00:08:34,628
but I can see nothing.
72
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:36,721
This fog is as thick
as bouillabaisse.
73
00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:37,931
- Nuts.
74
00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:38,765
- Beg your pardon?
75
00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:39,633
- Nuts, nuts.
76
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,305
There are no nuts
in my chocolate.
77
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:43,978
That stupid imbecile
in the shop,
78
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:46,223
give you raisins when I
asked you to get me nuts.
79
00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,895
- He didn't have any nuts.
80
00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:50,443
- The man in the shop?
81
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:53,064
- That's the reason
I took the raisins.
82
00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:54,360
- Oh, nevermind.
83
00:08:55,577 --> 00:08:57,284
We will soon be
there for dinner.
84
00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:58,277
Hot soup.
85
00:08:58,288 --> 00:08:59,619
- Oui, monsieur.
86
00:08:59,622 --> 00:09:01,909
Something is not right
in all of this, huh?
87
00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:04,032
I can feel it in my bones.
88
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,246
- In your what?
89
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:07,369
- In my bones.
90
00:09:08,590 --> 00:09:09,705
- Buns.
91
00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:11,002
You have buns.
92
00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:13,421
You bought buns and
you didn't tell me?
93
00:09:13,428 --> 00:09:14,918
Where are they,
where are the buns?
94
00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:17,136
- Oh, no, monsieur,
the bones in my body.
95
00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:18,346
- Oh.
96
00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:19,680
You should not
speak with an accent
97
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,049
when you know I'm so hungry.
98
00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:34,442
- If you ask me, Sam, this
is a wild goose chase.
99
00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:35,814
- Nobody asked you, baby.
100
00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:38,066
- Yes, they did, you asked me.
101
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:39,239
You asked me back
there if I thought...
102
00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:40,735
- That was then.
103
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:41,612
This is now,
104
00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:44,115
and nobody knows what
tomorrow will be.
105
00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:45,240
That's the way things are,
106
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,958
whether we like it or not.
107
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:50,587
- Sam, I worry about you
sometimes, I really do.
108
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:52,126
- All right, cut the malarkey.
109
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:54,420
This trip is strictly
business with me.
110
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:56,338
Now what do you got
on this Twain guy??
111
00:09:56,346 --> 00:09:58,633
- He was born in San
Francisco in 1906.
112
00:09:58,640 --> 00:09:59,880
His mother was a Roman Catholic,
113
00:09:59,891 --> 00:10:01,973
his father was an orthodox Jew.
114
00:10:01,976 --> 00:10:04,513
They were separated two
hours after the marriage.
115
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:05,852
- Any children?
116
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:07,391
- Yeah, one daughter, 32.
117
00:10:07,398 --> 00:10:09,890
Her name's Irene but
she calls herself Rita.
118
00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:11,938
- Just like a dame.
119
00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,107
Don't stop, angel,
you're doing fine.
120
00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,025
- Was arrested in
1932 in Chicago
121
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:18,524
for selling pornographic Bibles.
122
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:19,946
The DA couldn't make
the charge stick
123
00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:22,695
and the church refused
to turn over the Bibles.
124
00:10:22,705 --> 00:10:25,072
There's nothing
on 'em until '46,
125
00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:27,199
when he was picked
up in El Paso, Texas,
126
00:10:27,210 --> 00:10:28,917
for trying to
smuggle a truck load
127
00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:31,287
of rich white Americans
across the border
128
00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:32,833
into Mexico to pick melons.
129
00:10:33,925 --> 00:10:35,586
He was sent to the
Dallas Day Hospital
130
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:37,379
for mental observation.
131
00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:40,254
- I think we've picked
ourselves a queer bird, angel.
132
00:10:40,265 --> 00:10:41,801
Anything else?
133
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,845
- Oh, yeah, get this, Sam.
134
00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:47,140
Lionel Twain has one interesting
physical characteristic.
135
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,478
He has no pinkies.
136
00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:51,477
- No pinkies?
137
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,976
You mean Twain has
only got eight fingers?
138
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:56,274
- No, no, he's got 10.
139
00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:57,942
He just doesn't
have any pinkies.
140
00:10:57,949 --> 00:11:00,156
- You did your
homework good, angel.
141
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,321
- Thanks, Sam.
142
00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:02,863
- Where'd you dig
up all that stuff?
143
00:11:02,871 --> 00:11:04,578
- Oh, I wrote to
Twain and asked him.
144
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:06,242
- Good thinking.
145
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,871
- What's the matter?
146
00:11:10,879 --> 00:11:13,462
- Wouldn't you know, out of gas.
147
00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:18,083
- I saw a station about
five miles back, Sam.
148
00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,671
- I want you to know I'm gonna
be waiting for you, baby.
149
00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:36,939
- Here's the bridge, Pop.
150
00:11:36,946 --> 00:11:38,812
Doesn't look safe to me.
151
00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:42,361
- One way to find
out, drive across.
152
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,609
- Well, aren't you
gonna come with me?
153
00:11:44,621 --> 00:11:47,955
- Weight of two men maybe
too much for bridge.
154
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,493
- Then why do I get
to drive the car?
155
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:52,208
- 'Cause I smart enough
to get out first.
156
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:10,594
- I don't think I'm
gonna make it, Pop.
157
00:12:10,605 --> 00:12:11,470
It's gonna collapse.
158
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:12,937
- Don't worry.
159
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:15,433
Father find other way to house.
160
00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:29,830
- I made it, Pop, I made it.
161
00:12:29,832 --> 00:12:31,618
- Good, good.
162
00:12:31,626 --> 00:12:34,084
Now come back and
get adopted father.
163
00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:40,090
Look at the invitation,
what number of house?
164
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:42,630
- Two, two.
- Correct.
165
00:12:42,637 --> 00:12:44,878
Two, two Twain's
house, continue.
166
00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:13,073
Did you see that?
167
00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:13,915
- No.
168
00:13:13,918 --> 00:13:15,283
- Neither did I.
169
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,674
Stop, do not move.
170
00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:27,342
Something's wrong here.
171
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:28,383
- What is it, Pop?
172
00:13:28,391 --> 00:13:29,597
- Do not ask questions.
173
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:30,510
Do as I say.
174
00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:33,727
When I tell you jump, you jump.
175
00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:38,440
One, two, three, jump.
176
00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:41,351
- Holy Shanghai.
177
00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:45,610
Nice counting, Pop,
but how'd you know?
178
00:13:45,616 --> 00:13:47,027
- Look on ground.
179
00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,151
Ah.
180
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:52,530
Even had correct shoe size.
181
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:55,908
Someone 90 great trouble
to make welcome guests
182
00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:56,999
not so welcome.
183
00:13:58,296 --> 00:13:59,296
Ring bell please.
184
00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:03,002
- Are you nuts, Pop,
someone's trying to kill us?
185
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:06,422
- Yes, should make
exciting weekend.
186
00:14:06,429 --> 00:14:08,045
Ring, please.
187
00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:09,546
- I wish it was Monday morning.
188
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,468
Well, here goes.
189
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:19,143
Holy cow, they're
killing someone in there.
190
00:14:19,150 --> 00:14:20,106
- Calm yourself.
191
00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:21,474
- Didn't you hear her scream?
192
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:22,351
- Oh, no.
193
00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:23,944
You heard scream.
194
00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:27,029
More experienced
ear heard doorbell.
195
00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:28,114
Listen again.
196
00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:37,283
Mr. Twain has macabre
sense of humor, yeah?
197
00:15:00,358 --> 00:15:03,191
- Good evening, we have
been expecting you.
198
00:15:03,194 --> 00:15:04,901
- But in what condition?
199
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,362
Roof in need of repair.
200
00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:08,196
- Indeed.
201
00:15:08,199 --> 00:15:11,066
I'm afraid the house
is falling apart.
202
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:14,448
- May we come in, please?
203
00:15:14,455 --> 00:15:16,412
- I'm so sorry,
I thought you were in.
204
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,242
You are Mr. and Mrs. Charleston.
205
00:15:21,379 --> 00:15:26,169
- Not quite, I am Inspector
Wang of Catalina Police.
206
00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:28,041
This adopted son Willie.
207
00:15:29,971 --> 00:15:31,757
- I trust you had
a pleasant journey
208
00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:33,596
despite the storm.
209
00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:46,939
- Strange weather.
210
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:51,190
Storm only outside when inside.
211
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:52,235
- Oh, that.
212
00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:55,156
That's just one of
Mr. Twain's little toys.
213
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:57,120
An electronic device.
214
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:59,740
Mr. Twain, as you
will soon discover,
215
00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:03,038
prefers his atmosphere murky.
216
00:16:03,045 --> 00:16:04,706
May I have your bags, sir?
217
00:16:04,714 --> 00:16:06,955
- Oh, no, no, son will get bags.
218
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,583
That is why I adopted him.
219
00:16:09,594 --> 00:16:10,880
- Very good, sir.
220
00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:14,130
One moment please,
while I close the door.
221
00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:19,847
Now, if you will follow me.
222
00:16:19,854 --> 00:16:22,812
I will show you to your room.
223
00:16:33,451 --> 00:16:35,317
- Very large house.
224
00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:36,568
No other servants?
225
00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:38,240
- I'm not sure.
226
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:39,362
I've never seen anyone.
227
00:16:43,252 --> 00:16:46,995
Mr. Twain asked me to see that
you're made most comfortable,
228
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:49,919
and to say that he will be
joining you after dinner.
229
00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:51,257
- After dinner?
230
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:53,843
Host not have
dinner with guests?
231
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:58,090
- No, Mr. Twain
prefers to eat out.
232
00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:12,903
- Oh, wait please.
233
00:17:12,907 --> 00:17:13,942
What that?
234
00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:15,190
- That, oh it's nothing, sir.
235
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:16,201
Just the cat.
236
00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:19,287
- That cat?
237
00:17:20,248 --> 00:17:22,865
You feed cat dog food?
238
00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:25,617
- I'm afraid he's a
very angry cat, sir.
239
00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:29,713
Mr. Twain had him fixed
and he didn't want to be.
240
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:32,457
- Oh.
241
00:17:32,468 --> 00:17:33,503
- Big house, huh, Pop?
242
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:37,511
- Big house like man
married to fat woman,
243
00:17:37,515 --> 00:17:39,597
hard to get around.
244
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,090
- Ah, here we are.
245
00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:44,477
I'm sure you'll
find this suitable.
246
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,845
- Boy, it's a cold house.
247
00:17:45,856 --> 00:17:47,392
- I've taken care of that, sir.
248
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,937
You'll find a nice
cozy fire in your room.
249
00:18:09,505 --> 00:18:10,995
It's a bit smokey, sir.
250
00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:14,966
I'm afraid that old fireplace
hasn't been used in years.
251
00:18:14,969 --> 00:18:16,880
- At least the bed will be warm.
252
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:19,925
- If you wish anything,
sir, please ring.
253
00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:21,013
- Where bathroom?
254
00:18:21,017 --> 00:18:23,759
- It's behind the
bed, sir, there.
255
00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,177
Dinner will be at nine,
256
00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:30,022
and Mr. Twain likes
his guests to dress.
257
00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:33,815
Ah, the doorbell, excuse me.
258
00:18:37,575 --> 00:18:39,907
- Wow, what a creepy guy.
259
00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:41,992
Why would anyone want
to hire a blind butler?
260
00:18:41,996 --> 00:18:44,658
- For one thing, very cheap.
261
00:18:44,665 --> 00:18:47,248
How butler know how
much he get paid?
262
00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,872
- Drink this darling,
you'll feel better.
263
00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:55,294
- If Myron hadn't
barked when he did,
264
00:18:55,301 --> 00:18:57,292
we never would have seen
that statue falling.
265
00:18:57,303 --> 00:18:58,134
- Why, I don't think the statue
266
00:18:58,137 --> 00:18:59,002
was meant to kill us, darling,
267
00:18:59,013 --> 00:19:00,253
I think it was a warning.
268
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:02,175
Somebody's trying to
frighten us, but why?
269
00:19:02,183 --> 00:19:04,641
- Whatever his reason is,
he's doing a wonderful job.
270
00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:06,635
- Why the devil hasn't
anybody answered this door?
271
00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:08,136
- Don't ring it again, Dicky.
272
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:08,978
Knock, don't ring.
273
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:09,981
- I won't, I promise.
274
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,110
- What is it now, Myron?
275
00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:21,983
- Up there, Dora, look.
276
00:19:23,329 --> 00:19:24,740
A blind butler.
277
00:19:24,747 --> 00:19:26,363
- Don't let him
park the car, Dicky.
278
00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:36,297
- Good evening, we have
been expecting you.
279
00:19:37,301 --> 00:19:38,962
- We let ourselves
in, thank you.
280
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:40,255
Dick and Dora Charleston.
281
00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:44,426
- Good evening, we have
been expecting you.
282
00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:47,767
Your room is ready if you'll
just follow me please.
283
00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:51,846
Oh, don't mind him,
ma'am, it's just the cat.
284
00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:58,231
- We left our
luggage in the trunk.
285
00:19:58,239 --> 00:20:01,072
- I'll get it later,
ma'am, when I park the car.
286
00:20:05,079 --> 00:20:06,820
- Was that Mr. Wang's
car I noticed out front?
287
00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,664
- Yes, they're resting
now in their room.
288
00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:11,249
I have taken the
liberty of putting you
289
00:20:11,252 --> 00:20:13,584
in the same wing as Mr. Wang.
290
00:20:13,587 --> 00:20:14,497
- Oh, isn't that nice, darling?
291
00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:15,505
We're in Wang's wing.
292
00:20:24,807 --> 00:20:27,640
- Not many people come
to the manor these days.
293
00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:30,385
It's nice to hear guests again.
294
00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:31,602
- Thank you, you are?
295
00:20:31,605 --> 00:20:32,470
- Bensonmum, ma'am.
296
00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:33,312
- Thank you, Benson.
297
00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:35,397
- No, no, Bensonmum,
298
00:20:35,401 --> 00:20:37,233
my name is Bensonmum.
299
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,067
- Bensonmum?
300
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,687
- Yes, sir, Jamesir, Bensonmum.
301
00:20:40,698 --> 00:20:41,733
- Jamesir.
302
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:42,651
- Yes, sir.
303
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:43,989
- Jamesir Bensonmum.
304
00:20:43,993 --> 00:20:45,074
- Yes, sir.
305
00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:45,908
- How odd.
306
00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:47,151
- My father's name, sir.
307
00:20:47,163 --> 00:20:49,029
- What was your father's name?
308
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:50,780
- Howard, Howard Bensonmum.
309
00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:52,657
- Your father was
Howard Bensonmum?
310
00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:54,329
- Leave it be, clear,
I've had enough.
311
00:20:54,336 --> 00:20:55,622
- Oh, here we are.
312
00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:57,870
The late Mrs. Twain's room.
313
00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,089
She died in here.
314
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,048
- Oh dear.
315
00:21:01,051 --> 00:21:02,257
- Died of what?
316
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:05,094
- She murdered herself
in her sleep, sir.
317
00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:06,337
- You mean suicide?
318
00:21:06,348 --> 00:21:09,591
- Oh, no, it was
murder all right.
319
00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:12,640
Mrs. Twain hated herself.
320
00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:15,263
We keep this room locked.
321
00:21:15,274 --> 00:21:16,355
- Why is that?
322
00:21:16,358 --> 00:21:18,645
- Mr. Twain loved her very much.
323
00:21:18,652 --> 00:21:20,859
He's kept her room
just as it was
324
00:21:20,863 --> 00:21:24,822
the night she choked
herself nine years ago.
325
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,076
Madame loved it here.
326
00:21:37,087 --> 00:21:39,419
She said it was the
cheeriest room in the house.
327
00:21:43,552 --> 00:21:46,465
Ah, the doorbell.
328
00:21:46,472 --> 00:21:48,054
- That was Mrs. Charleston.
329
00:21:48,057 --> 00:21:49,889
- I thought she was
up here with us, sir?
330
00:21:49,892 --> 00:21:52,384
- I am and I will not
stay in this horribly
331
00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:53,259
filthy room overnight.
332
00:21:53,270 --> 00:21:55,602
- Filthy, very well, madame.
333
00:21:55,606 --> 00:21:57,392
I'll attend to it during dinner.
334
00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:58,889
- Thank you, Bensonson.
335
00:21:58,901 --> 00:22:00,517
- Mum.
- What?
336
00:22:00,528 --> 00:22:02,439
- Bensonmum, ma'am.
337
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:11,076
- Baking flour.
338
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:11,911
- What?
339
00:22:11,914 --> 00:22:13,075
- This dust is baking flour
340
00:22:14,291 --> 00:22:16,703
and these cobwebs,
candied sugar,
341
00:22:16,710 --> 00:22:18,542
all placed here recently
for the sole purpose
342
00:22:18,546 --> 00:22:21,459
of frightening us
and that mouse,
343
00:22:21,465 --> 00:22:22,921
honestly, mechanical toy.
344
00:22:27,221 --> 00:22:28,256
Silly.
345
00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:29,379
- What is?
346
00:22:29,390 --> 00:22:30,390
- I am.
347
00:22:31,392 --> 00:22:33,884
It's real.
348
00:22:38,148 --> 00:22:39,855
- Stop the car, we are here.
349
00:22:39,859 --> 00:22:41,850
- I know we are here, that's
why I stopped the car.
350
00:22:41,861 --> 00:22:43,226
- Open my door.
351
00:22:43,237 --> 00:22:44,648
- You have chocolate
on your face.
352
00:22:44,655 --> 00:22:45,486
- What?
353
00:22:45,489 --> 00:22:46,854
- The candy bar, it
is all over your face.
354
00:22:46,866 --> 00:22:48,322
- Imbecile, that's my mustache.
355
00:22:48,325 --> 00:22:49,736
- Lick it and see.
356
00:22:54,290 --> 00:22:55,997
- Wipe it off, my
hands are sticky.
357
00:23:00,421 --> 00:23:01,707
- Hold still please.
358
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:03,840
Sloppy.
359
00:23:10,806 --> 00:23:12,262
- All in good time.
360
00:23:19,356 --> 00:23:20,356
Yes?
361
00:23:21,942 --> 00:23:22,942
Who's there?
362
00:23:24,653 --> 00:23:26,314
Who's there, I say.
363
00:23:30,951 --> 00:23:31,951
Filthy neighborhood.
364
00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:36,616
- Didn't I say jump,
une, deux, trois, jump,
365
00:23:36,624 --> 00:23:37,455
I say.
366
00:23:37,458 --> 00:23:39,040
Why don't you listen to me?
367
00:23:39,043 --> 00:23:42,126
- Oh, leave me alone, sloppy.
368
00:23:57,394 --> 00:23:58,394
- Who are you?
369
00:24:05,486 --> 00:24:06,476
Oh.
370
00:24:06,487 --> 00:24:09,149
You must be the
new kitchen maid.
371
00:24:09,156 --> 00:24:11,238
I hope you can cook.
372
00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:12,572
Hm?
373
00:24:12,576 --> 00:24:13,941
Answer me.
374
00:24:13,953 --> 00:24:14,953
Speak up.
375
00:24:19,083 --> 00:24:20,289
What's that?
376
00:24:20,292 --> 00:24:22,249
I can't hear you.
377
00:24:22,252 --> 00:24:24,539
A little shy, are you?
378
00:24:24,546 --> 00:24:25,546
Nevermind.
379
00:24:27,424 --> 00:24:29,085
They will be 10 for dinner.
380
00:24:32,012 --> 00:24:33,423
Here is the menu.
381
00:24:46,777 --> 00:24:48,108
Is that understood?
382
00:24:48,112 --> 00:24:50,399
Dinner will be at nine,
383
00:24:50,406 --> 00:24:53,023
when I want you,
that hell on the wall
384
00:24:53,033 --> 00:24:54,740
will ring three times.
385
00:24:54,743 --> 00:24:57,531
All right, get to work.
386
00:25:04,378 --> 00:25:05,960
- Hello?
387
00:25:05,963 --> 00:25:08,204
Hello, hello, operator.
388
00:25:08,215 --> 00:25:10,297
I am saying hello, hello.
389
00:25:10,300 --> 00:25:11,756
- It's dead, sir.
390
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:13,922
- What, who is?
391
00:25:13,929 --> 00:25:14,760
Who are you?
392
00:25:14,763 --> 00:25:17,721
- The butler, sir.
- The butler, eh?
393
00:25:17,725 --> 00:25:18,725
I thought as much.
394
00:25:19,852 --> 00:25:21,684
- That phone has
been out of order
395
00:25:21,687 --> 00:25:23,769
for the past week, sir.
396
00:25:23,772 --> 00:25:25,388
- Is that a fact?
397
00:25:25,399 --> 00:25:26,389
And I put it to you
398
00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:29,643
that this wire has been
snipped not one hour ago.
399
00:25:29,653 --> 00:25:30,939
As you can plainly see.
400
00:25:32,448 --> 00:25:33,734
What is your name?
401
00:25:33,741 --> 00:25:34,741
- Bensonmum.
402
00:25:37,202 --> 00:25:39,318
- Your little jest escapes me.
403
00:25:39,329 --> 00:25:41,787
I am Monsieur Milo Perrier.
404
00:25:41,790 --> 00:25:44,248
My chauffeur was injured
by a falling gargoyle
405
00:25:44,251 --> 00:25:47,084
while standing outside
in Chinese footprints.
406
00:25:47,087 --> 00:25:49,328
We rang the bell,
a woman screamed,
407
00:25:49,339 --> 00:25:51,831
a mouse ran by us
through the door.
408
00:25:51,842 --> 00:25:55,005
As you can plainly
see, I miss nothing.
409
00:25:55,012 --> 00:25:57,003
Since we cannot
call for a doctor,
410
00:25:57,014 --> 00:25:59,346
I will need a cold
compress for my chauffeur,
411
00:25:59,349 --> 00:26:00,931
and a cup of hot
chocolate for me.
412
00:26:00,934 --> 00:26:01,765
N'est ce pas?
413
00:26:01,769 --> 00:26:03,476
- I don't think we
have N'est ce pas, sir.
414
00:26:03,479 --> 00:26:05,095
Just Hershey's.
415
00:26:05,105 --> 00:26:06,641
I'll call the maid.
416
00:26:19,661 --> 00:26:22,119
I'll fetch it for
you myself, sir.
417
00:26:23,207 --> 00:26:24,868
In the meantime, if
you'll be good enough
418
00:26:24,875 --> 00:26:26,240
to follow me to your room.
419
00:26:28,754 --> 00:26:29,754
- Get up, get up.
420
00:26:30,798 --> 00:26:33,711
There is something about
this butler I do not trust.
421
00:26:33,717 --> 00:26:37,051
Notice how his eyes
never look at you.
422
00:26:37,054 --> 00:26:38,169
- He's blind, monsieur.
423
00:26:40,891 --> 00:26:41,891
- Nonsense.
424
00:26:47,606 --> 00:26:49,438
- There's the house now.
425
00:26:49,441 --> 00:26:50,647
- Oh.
426
00:26:50,651 --> 00:26:51,686
- What's the matter?
427
00:26:51,693 --> 00:26:53,809
- My feet are killing me.
428
00:26:53,821 --> 00:26:54,982
Why didn't you tell
me we needed oil
429
00:26:54,988 --> 00:26:57,025
before I went back
for the gas, Sam.
430
00:26:57,991 --> 00:26:59,481
- Because I gave
you a 50 dollar bill
431
00:26:59,493 --> 00:27:01,234
and the gas was only five bucks.
432
00:27:01,245 --> 00:27:02,781
Maybe you'd come back,
maybe you wouldn't.
433
00:27:02,788 --> 00:27:05,155
I couldn't take
that chance, angel.
434
00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:06,701
- Don't you trust me, Sam?
435
00:27:06,708 --> 00:27:08,119
- Trust you?
436
00:27:08,127 --> 00:27:12,291
The last time that I trusted
a dame was in Paris in 1940.
437
00:27:12,297 --> 00:27:15,039
She said she was going out
to get a bottle of wine.
438
00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:18,463
Two hours later, the
Germans marched into France.
439
00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:20,552
- Oh, I'm sorry, Sam.
440
00:27:20,556 --> 00:27:22,263
- Sorry nothing,
give me my change.
441
00:27:29,565 --> 00:27:31,681
- Dinner will be at nine, sir.
442
00:27:31,692 --> 00:27:33,899
I'll have the maid
bring up your chocolate.
443
00:27:33,902 --> 00:27:35,893
- Oh, one moment, my good man.
444
00:27:35,904 --> 00:27:36,904
- Sir?
445
00:27:52,462 --> 00:27:54,169
- Thank you, that will be all.
446
00:27:57,843 --> 00:27:59,299
He's blind all right.
447
00:27:59,303 --> 00:28:00,919
Those were my funniest faces.
448
00:28:13,442 --> 00:28:15,524
- Not exactly the
Copacabana, is it?
449
00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:17,643
- I don't feel good
about this, Sam.
450
00:28:17,654 --> 00:28:20,237
Maybe tonight's the
night your luck runs out.
451
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:21,240
- Maybe so.
452
00:28:21,992 --> 00:28:24,154
There's a number on the
wall for all of us, angel,
453
00:28:24,161 --> 00:28:25,242
and if tonight's the night
454
00:28:25,245 --> 00:28:26,610
they pick mine, so be it.
455
00:28:28,749 --> 00:28:29,910
After you, sweetheart.
456
00:28:32,586 --> 00:28:34,327
- First kiss me, Sam.
457
00:28:34,338 --> 00:28:35,794
- I don't kiss.
458
00:28:35,797 --> 00:28:37,333
- Just this once, Sam.
459
00:28:37,341 --> 00:28:39,548
- I don't like kissing,
now leave me alone.
460
00:28:52,898 --> 00:28:54,764
- My god!
461
00:28:54,775 --> 00:28:56,982
- He's dead.
- I beg your pardon?
462
00:28:56,985 --> 00:28:58,441
- Sam Diamond, the
man I worked for
463
00:28:58,445 --> 00:29:00,732
is lying out there, he's
been crushed to death.
464
00:29:01,865 --> 00:29:03,776
I'm gonna faint, you catch me.
465
00:29:05,077 --> 00:29:06,659
- Madame?
466
00:29:06,662 --> 00:29:07,697
Madame, where are you?
467
00:29:09,039 --> 00:29:10,529
- All right, hold
it right there,
468
00:29:10,540 --> 00:29:12,406
freeze, Blinky,
get your hands up,
469
00:29:12,417 --> 00:29:13,703
turn your face to the wall.
470
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:22,132
All right, angel,
you can get up now.
471
00:29:22,135 --> 00:29:23,671
Turn around please.
472
00:29:26,974 --> 00:29:29,056
Your concrete Christmas
present arrived
473
00:29:29,059 --> 00:29:30,470
about two seconds early,
474
00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:31,842
no thanks to you.
475
00:29:31,853 --> 00:29:35,062
- I apologize for any
unfortunate mishaps, sir.
476
00:29:35,065 --> 00:29:36,647
May I put my hands down?
477
00:29:36,650 --> 00:29:39,187
- Don't test your
luck, Shakespeare.
478
00:29:39,194 --> 00:29:42,277
I got your little
invitation for dinner.
479
00:29:42,281 --> 00:29:45,239
But I didn't realize, I was
gonna be the main course.
480
00:29:48,161 --> 00:29:50,277
I had a kid brother
who got it the same way
481
00:29:50,289 --> 00:29:52,826
working on a case just
like this two years ago.
482
00:29:54,167 --> 00:29:57,080
That boy would have
been 63 on Tuesday.
483
00:29:58,338 --> 00:29:59,669
For two cents, I'd
like to take this...
484
00:29:59,673 --> 00:30:02,335
- Sam, don't.
- Get him away from me.
485
00:30:02,342 --> 00:30:03,342
Get him away.
486
00:30:04,344 --> 00:30:06,506
Get him away before I stuff him
487
00:30:06,513 --> 00:30:07,844
like one of them tiger trophies
488
00:30:07,848 --> 00:30:11,011
his limey pals like to
hang up on saloon walls.
489
00:30:11,018 --> 00:30:12,304
- Please.
490
00:30:15,105 --> 00:30:17,597
- He has a dreadful
temper, hasn't he?
491
00:30:31,997 --> 00:30:35,285
Nine o'clock, time for dinner.
492
00:30:35,292 --> 00:30:37,249
Is everything ready, hm?
493
00:30:38,670 --> 00:30:42,038
I don't smell anything.
494
00:30:42,049 --> 00:30:44,666
Very light on the
seasoning are you?
495
00:30:44,676 --> 00:30:46,792
Put the soup in the
tureen and keep the squabs
496
00:30:46,803 --> 00:30:48,009
on the low flame.
497
00:30:48,013 --> 00:30:49,720
I'll serve cocktails.
498
00:30:51,058 --> 00:30:52,139
When you hear the bell,
499
00:30:54,102 --> 00:30:55,843
bring out the chilled asparagus
500
00:30:55,854 --> 00:30:57,936
and turn up the
flame on the squabs.
501
00:31:00,984 --> 00:31:02,850
Have you got that?
502
00:31:18,460 --> 00:31:20,246
- You didn't tell me
how I look, Dicky.
503
00:31:20,253 --> 00:31:21,584
- No different than you
always look, darling,
504
00:31:21,588 --> 00:31:23,829
absolutely ravishing.
505
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:25,672
- Do you love me and adore me?
506
00:31:25,675 --> 00:31:28,087
- I love you and adore you.
507
00:31:28,095 --> 00:31:30,052
You still have the best
tush in high society.
508
00:31:30,055 --> 00:31:32,513
- Years of horseback
riding, darling.
509
00:31:32,516 --> 00:31:35,133
- Getting to bottom
of things, Charleston?
510
00:31:35,143 --> 00:31:36,008
- Ah, Wang.
511
00:31:36,019 --> 00:31:36,850
Darling, you remember?
512
00:31:36,853 --> 00:31:39,015
- Of course, nice to
see you, ah, Wang.
513
00:31:39,022 --> 00:31:40,854
- Always a pleasure, Mrs.
Charleston.
514
00:31:40,857 --> 00:31:42,973
- What a beautiful gown.
515
00:31:42,984 --> 00:31:44,440
You must tell me
where you got it.
516
00:31:44,444 --> 00:31:47,027
- This, oh, this an old dress.
517
00:31:47,030 --> 00:31:48,030
Had it for years.
518
00:31:49,950 --> 00:31:52,032
Please to meet
adopted son Willie.
519
00:31:52,994 --> 00:31:56,328
- Ah, east meets west in
a most bizarre setting.
520
00:31:56,331 --> 00:31:57,617
- Perrier.
- Charleston.
521
00:31:57,624 --> 00:31:59,160
- I didn't know
you were invited.
522
00:31:59,167 --> 00:31:59,998
You know Wang.
523
00:32:00,001 --> 00:32:01,537
- Ah, yes, I had the pleasure
524
00:32:01,545 --> 00:32:03,502
of dining in Shanghai
many years ago
525
00:32:03,505 --> 00:32:04,711
with Inspector Wang.
526
00:32:05,590 --> 00:32:08,457
- Hong ching chu
kow dung woo fong.
527
00:32:08,468 --> 00:32:10,630
- Oh you remember, yes.
528
00:32:10,637 --> 00:32:12,378
- Hong ching ch...
529
00:32:12,389 --> 00:32:13,800
- Kow dung woo fong.
530
00:32:15,809 --> 00:32:18,096
- My wife Dora,
Inspector Perrier.
531
00:32:18,103 --> 00:32:20,390
- Tres charmant.
532
00:32:21,523 --> 00:32:23,764
- I'm sorry, our
room is so dusty.
533
00:32:23,775 --> 00:32:26,483
- My fault, I should
have blown first.
534
00:32:30,740 --> 00:32:33,402
- Recovered from your
accident, Marcel?
535
00:32:33,410 --> 00:32:34,275
- Oui, monsieur.
536
00:32:34,286 --> 00:32:36,493
But how did you know?
537
00:32:36,496 --> 00:32:38,237
- From the way you bend.
538
00:32:38,248 --> 00:32:39,864
The right side of
your body smashed in
539
00:32:39,875 --> 00:32:41,741
by a Citröen, I imagine.
540
00:32:41,751 --> 00:32:44,118
I also thought I detected
a slight metallic sound
541
00:32:44,129 --> 00:32:45,119
which leads me to
believe you had
542
00:32:45,130 --> 00:32:47,497
an artificial hip put in, steel?
543
00:32:47,507 --> 00:32:48,918
- Aluminum.
544
00:32:48,925 --> 00:32:51,383
You're as quick as
ever, Charleston.
545
00:32:51,386 --> 00:32:53,127
- And you, Mr. Charleston,
546
00:32:53,138 --> 00:32:57,052
did not approve of Mrs.
Charleston dying hair blond.
547
00:32:57,058 --> 00:32:58,058
- I beg your pardon.
548
00:32:59,436 --> 00:33:02,098
- Mrs. Charleston's hair red.
549
00:33:02,105 --> 00:33:04,972
You have blond
hairs on shoulder.
550
00:33:06,067 --> 00:33:09,731
That means she has dyed
red hair to blonde,
551
00:33:09,738 --> 00:33:12,070
and back again to red or else
552
00:33:12,073 --> 00:33:13,108
you have been...
553
00:33:15,660 --> 00:33:18,869
Oh, so sorry, Wang is wrong.
554
00:33:18,872 --> 00:33:20,408
Shall we go to dinner, please?
555
00:33:27,631 --> 00:33:28,712
- Boy, Pop, you sure put your...
556
00:33:28,715 --> 00:33:30,080
- Shut Japanese mouth.
557
00:33:32,135 --> 00:33:35,002
- Must be simply ghastly
to have a hip removed.
558
00:33:35,013 --> 00:33:36,094
Does it hurt?
559
00:33:36,097 --> 00:33:39,215
- It only hurts in damp weather.
560
00:33:45,106 --> 00:33:46,392
- Are you all right?
561
00:33:46,399 --> 00:33:50,313
- Pay no attention,
you'll only spoil him.
562
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:51,526
Get up, get up.
563
00:33:54,199 --> 00:33:56,531
- As I was saying,
Mr. Charleston.
564
00:33:56,535 --> 00:33:57,535
- Hey, Pop.
565
00:33:59,621 --> 00:34:01,621
- Treacherous road like fresh mushroom.
- Hey, Pop!
566
00:34:02,916 --> 00:34:05,954
I know, clogs stick
tongue out of picture.
567
00:34:07,379 --> 00:34:09,586
Treacherous road
like fresh mushroom.
568
00:34:14,844 --> 00:34:16,755
- He's a charming fellow.
569
00:34:16,763 --> 00:34:19,130
- African death mask, died
in some tribal ritual,
570
00:34:19,140 --> 00:34:19,971
I should think.
571
00:34:19,975 --> 00:34:22,342
- Wonder where others are?
572
00:34:22,352 --> 00:34:23,352
- Others?
573
00:34:24,729 --> 00:34:26,140
What others?
574
00:34:26,147 --> 00:34:28,889
- Invitation to
dinner and murder
575
00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:30,732
finally clear to Wang,
576
00:34:30,735 --> 00:34:33,272
with appearance of
Monsieur Perrier.
577
00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:34,111
- It is obvious
578
00:34:34,114 --> 00:34:36,196
that only the world's
greatest living detectives
579
00:34:36,199 --> 00:34:37,439
are on the guest list.
580
00:34:37,450 --> 00:34:38,815
- Five of us, to
be exact, darling.
581
00:34:38,827 --> 00:34:40,317
Three already here.
582
00:34:40,328 --> 00:34:42,285
- Two have not yet arrived.
583
00:34:42,289 --> 00:34:44,246
- Miss Jessie
Marbles of England.
584
00:34:44,249 --> 00:34:45,080
- And Mr.-
585
00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:47,074
- Sam Diamond of San Francisco.
586
00:34:48,086 --> 00:34:50,168
I know who you all are.
587
00:34:50,171 --> 00:34:51,753
The lady here in
the rented dress
588
00:34:51,756 --> 00:34:54,669
is my secretary and mistress,
Miss Tess Skeffington.
589
00:34:54,676 --> 00:34:56,292
- Oh, Sam, don't.
590
00:34:56,303 --> 00:34:58,419
- Oh, I'm sorry, sweetheart.
591
00:34:58,430 --> 00:34:59,716
Ms. Skeffington doesn't like it
592
00:34:59,723 --> 00:35:01,634
when I'm so brutally honest,
593
00:35:01,641 --> 00:35:03,473
but then again, we're
all in a brutal business,
594
00:35:03,476 --> 00:35:04,557
aren't we gentlemen?
595
00:35:04,561 --> 00:35:09,522
- Never consider murder to
be business, Mr. Diamond.
596
00:35:09,524 --> 00:35:11,561
- Is that right, Mr. Wang?
597
00:35:11,568 --> 00:35:12,683
Well, maybe not for you,
598
00:35:12,694 --> 00:35:14,435
seeing as how you
put all your money
599
00:35:14,446 --> 00:35:16,528
into vegetables back
in the late 30's.
600
00:35:17,407 --> 00:35:18,772
Maybe our friends
here don't know
601
00:35:18,783 --> 00:35:21,115
that you own over 50%
of the beansprouts
602
00:35:21,119 --> 00:35:24,111
and the bamboo shoots grown
on the Chinese mainland,
603
00:35:25,165 --> 00:35:26,621
so you folks can imagine
604
00:35:26,625 --> 00:35:29,413
how much chicken chow mein
goes into Mr. Wang's pot
605
00:35:29,419 --> 00:35:32,207
each year, am I getting
those figures right, angel?
606
00:35:32,213 --> 00:35:33,169
- Right, Sam.
607
00:35:33,173 --> 00:35:35,631
- I don't see what this
has to do with anything?
608
00:35:35,634 --> 00:35:37,420
- For you, Mr. Perrier,
609
00:35:38,511 --> 00:35:40,593
you work both sides
of the big drink.
610
00:35:41,848 --> 00:35:43,134
Pretty good pickings over there,
611
00:35:43,141 --> 00:35:45,098
solving crimes for
them barons and earls
612
00:35:45,101 --> 00:35:47,718
and putting your fancy fees
into private Swiss banks.
613
00:35:48,647 --> 00:35:50,229
Three trips a years buys
a lot of hot chocolate,
614
00:35:50,231 --> 00:35:51,471
don't it, Frenchie?
615
00:35:51,483 --> 00:35:52,723
- Now, see here, Diamond.
616
00:35:52,734 --> 00:35:55,726
- No, you see here
Mr. Charleston of New York,
617
00:35:55,737 --> 00:35:57,569
Palm Beach, and Beverly Hills,
618
00:35:58,573 --> 00:36:01,281
crime is just a hobby
to you, isn't it?
619
00:36:01,284 --> 00:36:02,820
It's just a little
game to while away
620
00:36:02,827 --> 00:36:04,784
the time while you're
waiting for room service
621
00:36:04,788 --> 00:36:06,244
in some fancy hotel,
622
00:36:06,247 --> 00:36:07,703
while your wife's family dough
623
00:36:07,707 --> 00:36:10,825
buys her gin martinis
and your $300 suits.
624
00:36:10,835 --> 00:36:12,166
That's a pretty nice arrangement
625
00:36:12,170 --> 00:36:13,626
when all you gotta
do is give your wife
626
00:36:13,630 --> 00:36:15,212
a little grab every now and then
627
00:36:15,215 --> 00:36:17,297
and take the dog for
a leak twice a day.
628
00:36:18,218 --> 00:36:19,504
Sorry, if I'm
shocking you, ma'am,
629
00:36:19,511 --> 00:36:22,549
but I never had time to
go to finishing school.
630
00:36:22,555 --> 00:36:24,011
My school is the streets
631
00:36:24,015 --> 00:36:26,347
and looking down the barrel
of a pointed revolver
632
00:36:26,351 --> 00:36:27,386
is my teacher.
633
00:36:27,394 --> 00:36:29,556
I get $50 a day in expenses
634
00:36:29,562 --> 00:36:31,018
when I can get 'em, gentlemen,
635
00:36:32,107 --> 00:36:33,472
and I owe Ms. Skeffington here
636
00:36:33,483 --> 00:36:35,099
three years and two
months back pay,
637
00:36:35,110 --> 00:36:36,145
isn't that right, angel?
638
00:36:36,152 --> 00:36:38,519
- I don't care about
the money, Sam.
639
00:36:38,530 --> 00:36:39,941
- Neither do I.
640
00:36:39,948 --> 00:36:41,109
Now if one of you gentlemen
641
00:36:41,116 --> 00:36:43,153
would be so kind as to
give my lady friend here
642
00:36:43,159 --> 00:36:45,196
a glass of cheap white wine,
643
00:36:45,203 --> 00:36:47,865
I'm going down the
hall to find the can.
644
00:36:47,872 --> 00:36:49,988
Talk so much sometimes,
I forget to go.
645
00:36:53,545 --> 00:36:57,209
- Please excuse Sam, he was
shot in the head last week.
646
00:36:57,215 --> 00:36:59,047
He shouldn't even be
out of the hospital.
647
00:36:59,050 --> 00:37:00,666
- Well, if you ask me,
648
00:37:00,677 --> 00:37:02,167
I think the fellow's
pretty damned honest.
649
00:37:02,178 --> 00:37:03,384
- Dicky, language.
650
00:37:03,388 --> 00:37:06,255
- Miss Jessica
Marbles and nurse.
651
00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:18,518
- Oh, Ms. Marbles,
so we finally meet.
652
00:37:19,529 --> 00:37:24,490
I've admired you ever since
I was tiny little detective.
653
00:37:24,784 --> 00:37:26,400
- Thank you, Mr. Wang.
654
00:37:26,411 --> 00:37:29,324
I am Jessica Marbles.
655
00:37:29,330 --> 00:37:32,118
This is Ms. Withers, my nurse.
656
00:37:32,125 --> 00:37:34,366
She has been with me 52 years.
657
00:37:34,377 --> 00:37:36,459
I have to take care
of the poor dear now.
658
00:37:37,380 --> 00:37:38,870
Are you all right, Ms. Withers?
659
00:37:40,049 --> 00:37:42,006
Do you want your medicine now?
660
00:37:42,010 --> 00:37:43,045
- Well, well.
661
00:37:46,222 --> 00:37:47,222
- Ooh, ooh.
662
00:37:51,311 --> 00:37:52,767
- She's off.
663
00:37:52,771 --> 00:37:55,854
I could use a good stiff
shot, Mr. Charleston.
664
00:37:55,857 --> 00:37:58,098
I believe the booze,
as you call it,
665
00:37:58,109 --> 00:37:59,349
is your department.
666
00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:01,067
- My pleasure, madame.
667
00:38:01,070 --> 00:38:03,061
- Who is the old geezer?
668
00:38:03,072 --> 00:38:04,072
- Sam.
669
00:38:04,991 --> 00:38:07,449
- Jessie, baby.
- Sam Diamond.
670
00:38:09,329 --> 00:38:11,240
- Mr. Diamond, you have a
bullet hole in your back.
671
00:38:11,247 --> 00:38:13,238
- You should see the other guy.
672
00:38:15,126 --> 00:38:16,833
- Quiet please.
673
00:38:16,836 --> 00:38:19,919
Observe strange sound.
674
00:38:24,636 --> 00:38:26,627
- My god, it's the face.
675
00:38:26,638 --> 00:38:28,470
It's coming from the face.
676
00:38:31,100 --> 00:38:33,808
- Actually, he's going through
his final moments of death
677
00:38:33,812 --> 00:38:34,643
What could it mean?
678
00:38:34,646 --> 00:38:36,557
- It means dinner, sir.
679
00:38:36,564 --> 00:38:37,645
We have no gong.
680
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:50,534
- Ladies and gentlemen,
I would like to make a toast.
681
00:38:50,537 --> 00:38:52,198
Our host, Mr. Lionel Twain,
682
00:38:52,205 --> 00:38:55,118
is indeed a most unique man.
683
00:38:55,124 --> 00:38:57,491
Point one, he has
succeeded in gathering
684
00:38:57,502 --> 00:38:59,914
the world's five
greatest detectives
685
00:38:59,921 --> 00:39:03,334
to investigate a crime that
has not yet been committed.
686
00:39:03,341 --> 00:39:06,333
Point two, he has
set traps for us,
687
00:39:06,344 --> 00:39:07,709
a bridge that almost collapses,
688
00:39:07,720 --> 00:39:11,054
falling statues, does
he mean to kill us?
689
00:39:11,057 --> 00:39:13,549
Certainly not yet, he could
have done that at any time.
690
00:39:13,560 --> 00:39:16,052
He's merely trying
to whet our appetites
691
00:39:16,062 --> 00:39:17,769
for the game that is to follow.
692
00:39:17,772 --> 00:39:21,891
Point three, why five
detectives instead of one?
693
00:39:21,901 --> 00:39:24,233
Because he intends
to take us all on,
694
00:39:24,237 --> 00:39:25,443
ladies and gentlemen,
695
00:39:25,446 --> 00:39:29,064
a feat that no criminal mind
has heretofore attempted.
696
00:39:29,075 --> 00:39:32,409
Therefore, before this
hellish weekend begins,
697
00:39:32,412 --> 00:39:33,868
I propose that we
raise our wine glasses
698
00:39:33,872 --> 00:39:36,955
in a toast to either
the most beguiling
699
00:39:36,958 --> 00:39:41,418
and charming man or to an
insidious, fiendish madman.
700
00:39:43,423 --> 00:39:44,423
Bottoms up.
701
00:39:45,174 --> 00:39:46,174
- One moment, please.
702
00:39:47,135 --> 00:39:49,923
Point four, wine poisoned.
703
00:39:49,929 --> 00:39:51,670
- What?
- What does it mean?
704
00:39:51,681 --> 00:39:54,139
- An ancient
tasteless, colorless,
705
00:39:54,142 --> 00:39:55,803
and odorless Oriental herb.
706
00:39:56,853 --> 00:39:58,469
Kills instantly.
707
00:39:58,479 --> 00:39:59,640
Observe, please.
708
00:40:03,526 --> 00:40:04,526
- Oh.
709
00:40:08,281 --> 00:40:11,319
Great Scott, Mr. Wang,
you saved our lives.
710
00:40:11,326 --> 00:40:12,782
- Not quite, Mrs. Charleston.
711
00:40:14,287 --> 00:40:15,287
Bon appetit.
712
00:40:16,122 --> 00:40:17,738
- No, no.
- Oh Jesus.
713
00:40:19,584 --> 00:40:21,074
- Since Monsieur
Wang was the only one
714
00:40:21,085 --> 00:40:22,541
who could detect such a poison,
715
00:40:22,545 --> 00:40:24,502
he was the only
one who was tested.
716
00:40:24,505 --> 00:40:29,466
Point five, Monsieur Twain is
both beguiling and fiendish.
717
00:40:31,137 --> 00:40:32,137
Murder.
718
00:40:32,931 --> 00:40:33,762
- Oh.
719
00:40:33,765 --> 00:40:35,130
Oh, get a doctor quick.
720
00:40:36,392 --> 00:40:38,759
- No, no-it's alright.
My wine is not poisoned.
721
00:40:38,770 --> 00:40:40,101
It was just a bad year.
722
00:40:42,065 --> 00:40:43,681
- Good work, Mr. Wang.
723
00:40:43,691 --> 00:40:46,854
We must be all on our guard
through every course of the meal.
724
00:40:47,946 --> 00:40:49,778
- You're all
forgetting one thing.
725
00:40:51,407 --> 00:40:53,318
This makes the butler
pretty suspicious
726
00:40:53,326 --> 00:40:55,283
since he's the one
who poured the wine.
727
00:40:55,286 --> 00:40:57,527
- Except for the fact,
monsieur, that he is blind.
728
00:40:57,538 --> 00:40:58,619
How would he know
which one to serve
729
00:40:58,623 --> 00:40:59,579
the poisoned glass to?
730
00:40:59,582 --> 00:41:01,619
- That's very simple.
731
00:41:01,626 --> 00:41:04,618
Blind people have a very
keen sense of smell.
732
00:41:05,588 --> 00:41:07,078
Since we're all Anglo Saxon
733
00:41:07,090 --> 00:41:09,673
and Mr. Wang's son is Japanese,
734
00:41:09,676 --> 00:41:12,293
it wouldn't be hard to
sniff out the Chinaman.
735
00:41:12,303 --> 00:41:13,919
- See how, Diamond, that's
a pretty tacky thing
736
00:41:13,930 --> 00:41:14,715
to say, isn't it?
737
00:41:14,722 --> 00:41:17,464
- Well, it's a pretty tacky
world, Mr. Charleston.
738
00:41:17,475 --> 00:41:18,806
Isn't that right, angel?
739
00:41:18,810 --> 00:41:20,266
- Right, Sam.
740
00:41:20,269 --> 00:41:21,259
- Quiet, please.
741
00:41:21,270 --> 00:41:22,601
Butler approaches.
742
00:41:23,815 --> 00:41:25,601
- I apologize for the delay.
743
00:41:25,608 --> 00:41:27,815
I seem to be having some
communication problems
744
00:41:27,819 --> 00:41:29,275
with the cook.
745
00:41:29,278 --> 00:41:30,643
- Who poured the wine?
746
00:41:30,655 --> 00:41:32,566
- Mr. Twain, sir.
747
00:41:32,573 --> 00:41:36,111
It was left for me on a
tray in the refrigerator.
748
00:41:36,119 --> 00:41:37,860
I was told to give Mr. Wang
749
00:41:37,870 --> 00:41:40,202
the glass with the sticky stem.
750
00:41:40,206 --> 00:41:42,038
- And you didn't
bother to ask why?
751
00:41:42,041 --> 00:41:44,703
- I was lucky to find
the refrigerator, sir.
752
00:41:44,711 --> 00:41:47,043
If I may serve the soup now?
753
00:41:47,046 --> 00:41:48,832
- By all means.
754
00:41:59,058 --> 00:42:01,720
Oh, yes, I am famished.
755
00:42:18,369 --> 00:42:19,609
Where is the soup?
756
00:42:19,620 --> 00:42:21,486
- In your dish, sir.
757
00:42:21,497 --> 00:42:23,864
- There is nothing in
my dish but my dish.
758
00:42:24,792 --> 00:42:26,374
- I don't understand, sir.
759
00:42:26,377 --> 00:42:28,618
- Here, take the spoon.
760
00:42:28,629 --> 00:42:29,960
Taste it for yourself.
761
00:42:39,307 --> 00:42:41,344
- I see what you mean, sir.
762
00:42:41,350 --> 00:42:42,181
If you'll excuse me,
763
00:42:42,185 --> 00:42:44,802
I'd better have a little
talk with the cook.
764
00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:50,891
- Murder by starvation,
maybe that's his game.
765
00:42:52,487 --> 00:42:53,773
What do you think, Sam?
766
00:42:53,780 --> 00:42:54,611
- I don't know, Jess,
767
00:42:54,614 --> 00:42:56,025
why don't you ask the
moose on the wall?
768
00:42:56,032 --> 00:42:57,943
He's been watching
us since we came in.
769
00:43:02,497 --> 00:43:03,703
- 10 people for dinner,
770
00:43:03,706 --> 00:43:05,367
and I'm serving
them hot nothing.
771
00:43:06,834 --> 00:43:08,290
You can't get good help today.
772
00:43:15,301 --> 00:43:17,292
You're fired, you
understand, fired.
773
00:43:19,138 --> 00:43:21,129
I want you out, you hear, out.
774
00:43:27,688 --> 00:43:28,723
And stay out.
775
00:43:31,776 --> 00:43:33,437
- Something just occurred to me.
776
00:43:33,444 --> 00:43:34,730
The seating's all wrong.
777
00:43:34,737 --> 00:43:36,193
- How so, Mr. Charleston.
778
00:43:36,197 --> 00:43:37,858
- I'm sitting next to Dora.
779
00:43:37,865 --> 00:43:38,696
- Well, what's wrong with that?
780
00:43:38,699 --> 00:43:40,406
She's your wife, isn't she?
781
00:43:40,409 --> 00:43:42,741
- Exactly, at a
proper dinner party,
782
00:43:42,745 --> 00:43:44,531
the husband is never
seated next to the wife.
783
00:43:44,539 --> 00:43:46,530
Actually I should be on the
opposite side of the table.
784
00:43:46,541 --> 00:43:48,373
Mr. Wang, will you
change places with me.
785
00:43:48,376 --> 00:43:49,537
- Now, Mr. Charleston.
786
00:43:49,544 --> 00:43:50,909
- Now, Mr. Wang.
787
00:43:54,340 --> 00:43:55,125
Just as I thought.
788
00:43:55,133 --> 00:43:57,044
Another test that could
have cost us our lives.
789
00:43:57,051 --> 00:44:00,510
Saved only by the fact that
I am enormously well bred.
790
00:44:00,513 --> 00:44:01,344
- Lucky it wasn't me.
791
00:44:01,347 --> 00:44:02,747
I'd have been
chopped liver by now.
792
00:44:07,311 --> 00:44:08,472
- Turn on the lights.
- Get back.
793
00:44:08,479 --> 00:44:09,810
- Silence, please.
794
00:44:09,814 --> 00:44:11,145
Do not panic.
795
00:44:11,149 --> 00:44:13,311
No person move from place.
796
00:44:13,317 --> 00:44:14,148
- Someone just
came into the room.
797
00:44:14,152 --> 00:44:14,983
I hear footsteps.
798
00:44:14,986 --> 00:44:17,478
- Oh, God.
- Wait, quiet, everyone.
799
00:44:18,406 --> 00:44:19,612
I smell something.
800
00:44:19,615 --> 00:44:21,276
- What is it?
801
00:44:21,284 --> 00:44:22,774
- Good god.
802
00:44:22,785 --> 00:44:24,321
Franks and beans.
803
00:44:24,328 --> 00:44:27,036
- I'm afraid that's
all we have, sir.
804
00:44:27,039 --> 00:44:27,870
- Dicky, don't.
805
00:44:27,874 --> 00:44:29,956
You know how I get when
you touch me there.
806
00:44:29,959 --> 00:44:31,575
- Not me, darling, I got
my hands in my pockets.
807
00:44:31,586 --> 00:44:33,702
- Oh.
- I'm afraid they're my pockets.
808
00:44:33,713 --> 00:44:36,546
- Oh, sorry about that.
- Dicky, behave yourself.
809
00:44:39,677 --> 00:44:42,169
- Good evening,
ladies and gentlemen.
810
00:44:42,180 --> 00:44:44,342
I am your host, Lionel Twain.
811
00:44:59,864 --> 00:45:02,196
- Good god, what an entrance.
812
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:05,113
- Oh, a bit theatrical, Ms.
Marbles,
813
00:45:05,119 --> 00:45:07,360
but I do so love illusion.
814
00:45:07,371 --> 00:45:10,284
Please forgive my hat,
I'm losing my hair.
815
00:45:10,291 --> 00:45:13,033
- I thought Twain was an
older man, say 72, 73.
816
00:45:14,128 --> 00:45:17,621
- 76 to be exact, Mr. Diamond.
817
00:45:17,632 --> 00:45:19,669
How do I look so young?
818
00:45:19,675 --> 00:45:23,339
Quiet simple, a
complete vegetable diet,
819
00:45:23,346 --> 00:45:25,087
12 hours sleep a night,
820
00:45:25,097 --> 00:45:28,215
and lots and lots of makeup.
821
00:45:28,226 --> 00:45:31,264
I trust you've all
been made comfortable.
822
00:45:31,270 --> 00:45:32,681
- Comfortable, Mr. Twain?
823
00:45:32,688 --> 00:45:36,522
Do you call poisoned wine and
near decapitation comfortable?
824
00:45:36,525 --> 00:45:37,811
- No.
825
00:45:37,818 --> 00:45:39,900
I call it inspiration.
826
00:45:39,904 --> 00:45:41,190
- You still have not explained
827
00:45:41,197 --> 00:45:43,279
the various mechanical
and culinary attempts
828
00:45:43,282 --> 00:45:44,943
on our lives, Monsieur Twain.
829
00:45:44,951 --> 00:45:47,818
- Merely games,
Monsieur Perrier.
830
00:45:47,828 --> 00:45:51,037
Pitting wits with
you, so to speak.
831
00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:52,781
- You pit your wits
with me, little man,
832
00:45:52,792 --> 00:45:54,123
and you won't have
your wits to pit with,
833
00:45:54,126 --> 00:45:55,207
know what I mean?
834
00:45:55,211 --> 00:45:57,043
- Sam, you're
spitting on the nurse.
835
00:45:58,047 --> 00:45:59,663
- Sorry, old lady.
836
00:45:59,674 --> 00:46:01,915
Crazy broad should be in bed.
837
00:46:01,926 --> 00:46:04,213
- Mr. Twain, we have been
here nearly four hours,
838
00:46:04,220 --> 00:46:06,086
and there has not been
a hint of a hot dinner
839
00:46:06,097 --> 00:46:07,508
or a cold corpse.
840
00:46:07,515 --> 00:46:09,847
I must therefore bid you adieu.
841
00:46:09,850 --> 00:46:11,716
- I bid one adieu as well.
842
00:46:11,727 --> 00:46:14,264
- No one is leaving this house.
843
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:28,737
- What meaning of
this, Mr. Twain?
844
00:46:28,744 --> 00:46:30,360
- I will tell you, Mr. Wang,
845
00:46:30,371 --> 00:46:33,079
if you can tell me why
a man who possesses
846
00:46:33,082 --> 00:46:34,572
one of the most brilliant minds
847
00:46:34,583 --> 00:46:36,699
of this century can't
say his prepositions
848
00:46:36,711 --> 00:46:39,203
or articles, the, Mr. Wang,
849
00:46:39,213 --> 00:46:40,874
what is the meaning of this?
850
00:46:40,881 --> 00:46:42,713
- That's what I said.
851
00:46:42,717 --> 00:46:44,833
What meaning of this?
852
00:46:44,844 --> 00:46:48,053
- The meaning of this
is that I have decided
853
00:46:48,055 --> 00:46:50,638
to prove beyond a
shadow of a doubt
854
00:46:50,641 --> 00:46:54,054
that the greatest living
criminologist in the world
855
00:46:54,061 --> 00:46:55,847
is sitting at this table,
856
00:46:55,855 --> 00:46:57,766
and you are all looking at him.
857
00:46:58,858 --> 00:47:01,190
No, don't look at each other.
858
00:47:01,193 --> 00:47:03,355
Look at me, I'm the greatest.
859
00:47:03,362 --> 00:47:05,228
I'm number one.
860
00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:07,776
- To me, you look like
number two, know what I mean?
861
00:47:08,909 --> 00:47:10,616
- What does he mean, Ms.
Skeffington?
862
00:47:10,619 --> 00:47:12,986
- I'll tell you later,
it's disgusting.
863
00:47:12,997 --> 00:47:15,034
- In all your
various adventures,
864
00:47:15,041 --> 00:47:17,658
monsieurs and madames,
not one of you
865
00:47:17,668 --> 00:47:20,160
has ever had an unsolved murder.
866
00:47:20,171 --> 00:47:23,380
Your reputations exist
on this single fact,
867
00:47:24,425 --> 00:47:27,668
but what would the world say
868
00:47:27,678 --> 00:47:30,466
if the five greatest
living detectives
869
00:47:30,473 --> 00:47:32,680
found themselves trapped
in a country house
870
00:47:32,683 --> 00:47:36,221
at the weekend, shut off
from the outside world,
871
00:47:36,228 --> 00:47:39,311
only to discover a
dead body on the floor
872
00:47:39,315 --> 00:47:42,649
stabbed 12 times in the
back with a butcher's knife,
873
00:47:42,651 --> 00:47:47,566
and not one of you,
able to solve the crime.
874
00:47:48,699 --> 00:47:49,609
- You mean murder?
875
00:47:49,617 --> 00:47:51,358
- Dora, please,
we're talking shop.
876
00:47:51,369 --> 00:47:53,827
- Yes, murder, Mrs. Charleston.
877
00:47:53,829 --> 00:47:55,866
On the stroke of midnight,
878
00:47:55,873 --> 00:47:59,241
someone in this house is going
to be viciously murdered.
879
00:47:59,251 --> 00:48:02,664
- Left out one small
detail, Mr. Twain.
880
00:48:04,048 --> 00:48:05,288
Who victim?
881
00:48:06,384 --> 00:48:08,967
- Is the, is the,
882
00:48:08,969 --> 00:48:10,880
who is the victim?
883
00:48:10,888 --> 00:48:11,969
That drives me crazy.
884
00:48:11,972 --> 00:48:14,634
- Sounds like a
short ride to me.
885
00:48:14,642 --> 00:48:16,258
- Does it, Mr. Diamond.
886
00:48:16,268 --> 00:48:19,056
Well, we shall see who is sane
887
00:48:19,063 --> 00:48:20,929
and who is crazy around here.
888
00:48:22,983 --> 00:48:25,725
Mr. Wang, the victim is here
889
00:48:25,736 --> 00:48:28,569
at this very table,
at this very moment,
890
00:48:28,572 --> 00:48:32,861
and so too, ladies and
gentlemen, is the murderer.
891
00:48:33,786 --> 00:48:35,572
- Murder-poo?
892
00:48:35,579 --> 00:48:36,694
- Yes, dear.
893
00:48:36,705 --> 00:48:39,493
We're going to have
a lovely Murder-poo.
894
00:48:40,709 --> 00:48:41,995
- Why don't you
push her wheelchair
895
00:48:42,002 --> 00:48:44,539
down a driveway, we
got business here.
896
00:48:44,547 --> 00:48:46,584
You say you know
who's gonna get it?
897
00:48:46,590 --> 00:48:47,671
- Intimately.
898
00:48:47,675 --> 00:48:49,541
- And you know how the
crime is to be committed?
899
00:48:49,552 --> 00:48:50,383
- Definitely.
900
00:48:50,386 --> 00:48:52,923
- And exactly what time
murder to take place?
901
00:48:52,930 --> 00:48:55,888
- The murder, precisely.
902
00:48:55,891 --> 00:48:57,598
- Well, I know it's
none of my business,
903
00:48:57,601 --> 00:49:00,343
but doesn't that mean that
you're the murderer, Mr. Twain?
904
00:49:00,354 --> 00:49:03,972
- No wives, I refuse to
discuss this with wives.
905
00:49:03,983 --> 00:49:05,769
- Dora's quite right,
all fingers do seem
906
00:49:05,776 --> 00:49:08,017
to point to you, not much
of a challenge, I'd say.
907
00:49:08,028 --> 00:49:11,146
- Shall I make it more
interesting, Mr. Charleston?
908
00:49:11,157 --> 00:49:14,400
One million dollars to the
one who solves the crime
909
00:49:14,410 --> 00:49:17,277
wagered against
your reputations.
910
00:49:17,288 --> 00:49:19,620
One million dollars
in tax free cash,
911
00:49:19,623 --> 00:49:22,035
in addition, all
the paperback rights
912
00:49:22,042 --> 00:49:23,703
and the film sale.
913
00:49:23,711 --> 00:49:25,827
It's 11 o'clock, amigos,
914
00:49:25,838 --> 00:49:29,502
just one hour before death
strikes someone in this room.
915
00:49:29,508 --> 00:49:32,216
See ya at midnight, toodle ooh.
916
00:49:35,681 --> 00:49:36,842
- See here, Mr. Twain.
917
00:49:39,268 --> 00:49:40,099
- He's gone.
918
00:49:40,102 --> 00:49:42,343
- No, he's not, he's down there.
919
00:49:42,354 --> 00:49:43,640
- Oh.
920
00:49:43,647 --> 00:49:45,763
- Fast little bunny
rabbit, ain't you?
921
00:49:45,774 --> 00:49:47,640
- I never moved, Mr. Diamond.
922
00:49:47,651 --> 00:49:49,233
I'm still down there.
923
00:49:49,236 --> 00:49:51,273
A little stunt
done with mirrors.
924
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:52,280
- Is that so?
925
00:49:53,365 --> 00:49:55,481
Willing to risk
seven years had luck?
926
00:49:55,493 --> 00:49:56,904
- Try it, Mr. Diamond.
927
00:49:56,911 --> 00:49:58,743
- It's your funeral, butterball.
928
00:50:00,539 --> 00:50:02,246
- Wait, wait.
929
00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:03,831
Sometimes it doesn't work.
930
00:50:06,212 --> 00:50:09,295
You've won this
round, Mr. Diamond.
931
00:50:09,298 --> 00:50:11,881
My turn comes at midnight.
932
00:50:20,684 --> 00:50:22,721
- I hope he knows how
to stop that thing.
933
00:50:24,063 --> 00:50:26,771
- If you ask me, anybody
that offers a million bucks
934
00:50:26,774 --> 00:50:28,856
to solve a crime that
ain't been committed yet,
935
00:50:28,859 --> 00:50:31,476
there's a lot more
upstairs than his hair.
936
00:50:31,487 --> 00:50:32,477
- What do we all do now?
937
00:50:32,488 --> 00:50:33,774
Just sit around and
wait for one of us
938
00:50:33,781 --> 00:50:34,691
to be butchered?
939
00:50:34,698 --> 00:50:36,609
- And what has
happened to the butler?
940
00:50:36,617 --> 00:50:37,857
Why has he not returned?
941
00:50:38,827 --> 00:50:40,363
With our dinner?
942
00:50:40,371 --> 00:50:41,953
Go look for him.
- Oui, monsieur.
943
00:50:41,956 --> 00:50:44,243
- No, no one to leave this room.
944
00:50:44,250 --> 00:50:45,536
- Why not, Pa?
945
00:50:45,543 --> 00:50:48,035
- Twain say victim
at this table.
946
00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:49,911
"If we a" stay together,
947
00:50:49,922 --> 00:50:52,209
crime cannot be committed
without witnesses.
948
00:50:52,216 --> 00:50:55,208
- He's right, you're one
smart Chinaman, Mr. Wang.
949
00:50:55,219 --> 00:50:57,005
- I suggest we all join hands.
950
00:50:57,012 --> 00:50:59,970
The chain is stronger if
the links are unbroken.
951
00:50:59,974 --> 00:51:01,180
Join hands, please.
952
00:51:13,946 --> 00:51:14,946
- Stop that.
953
00:51:18,993 --> 00:51:20,779
Stop it, I said.
954
00:51:20,786 --> 00:51:22,618
- What is it, Diamond?
955
00:51:22,621 --> 00:51:24,362
- The nurse is giving
my palm the finger,
956
00:51:24,373 --> 00:51:25,989
the dirty, old broad.
957
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:27,616
- Naughty, naughty Ms. Withers.
958
00:51:33,465 --> 00:51:34,500
- Good God.
959
00:51:34,508 --> 00:51:36,124
- What is it?
- Look.
960
00:51:41,015 --> 00:51:42,380
- What is she doing?
961
00:51:42,391 --> 00:51:43,631
- I think she's screaming.
962
00:51:43,642 --> 00:51:44,473
- What is it?
963
00:51:44,476 --> 00:51:45,466
What's happened?
964
00:51:45,477 --> 00:51:46,717
- Something wrong in kitchen.
965
00:51:46,729 --> 00:51:47,890
- With our dinner.
966
00:51:47,896 --> 00:51:49,182
- No, patience, patience.
967
00:51:49,189 --> 00:51:50,304
- Is someone in there?
968
00:51:50,316 --> 00:51:51,898
- Someone in the
kitchen with dinner?
969
00:51:51,900 --> 00:51:53,311
- Cook cannot speak or hear.
970
00:51:55,237 --> 00:51:56,443
Ah.
971
00:51:56,447 --> 00:51:59,189
I think butler is dead.
972
00:51:59,199 --> 00:52:01,065
My name is Yetta.
973
00:52:01,076 --> 00:52:03,113
I don't work Thursdays.
974
00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:04,736
- Ask her if she
sleeps in, Dicky.
975
00:52:04,747 --> 00:52:06,078
- We must investigate
this, Wang.
976
00:52:06,081 --> 00:52:06,946
Someone has to go.
977
00:52:06,957 --> 00:52:07,992
- Not alone.
978
00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:10,412
Mr. Charleston, Mr. Diamond,
stay with others,
979
00:52:10,419 --> 00:52:14,458
Ms. Marble, Mr. Perrier and
Wang, we'll investigate.
980
00:52:17,384 --> 00:52:18,715
- Oh.
981
00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:19,709
Oh, that's right.
982
00:52:19,720 --> 00:52:21,176
Just let it all out.
983
00:52:22,681 --> 00:52:23,681
Here.
984
00:52:25,059 --> 00:52:26,595
Oh dear.
985
00:52:27,686 --> 00:52:28,892
- Careful Wang.
986
00:52:28,896 --> 00:52:30,682
Fingerprints.
987
00:52:30,689 --> 00:52:31,520
- Ah.
988
00:52:31,523 --> 00:52:32,523
Yes.
989
00:52:33,359 --> 00:52:34,849
- Here, take my handkerchief.
990
00:52:49,583 --> 00:52:50,414
- Is he?
991
00:52:50,417 --> 00:52:51,248
- He looks like...
992
00:52:51,251 --> 00:52:52,251
- Seems like...
993
00:52:54,088 --> 00:52:55,544
- Touch nothing!
994
00:52:55,547 --> 00:52:56,753
- Fingerprints.
995
00:52:56,757 --> 00:52:58,748
- Quite so.
996
00:52:58,759 --> 00:52:59,749
Pencil.
997
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:00,760
- Pencil.
998
00:53:15,234 --> 00:53:16,234
- No pulse.
999
00:53:17,945 --> 00:53:18,945
No heartbeat.
1000
00:53:20,447 --> 00:53:25,192
If condition does not
change, this man is dead.
1001
00:53:25,202 --> 00:53:26,442
- No signs of foul play.
1002
00:53:27,371 --> 00:53:29,487
- Hold on, what's this?
1003
00:53:32,209 --> 00:53:35,702
What do you make
of this, Perrier?
1004
00:53:35,713 --> 00:53:36,623
- Poisoned.
1005
00:53:36,630 --> 00:53:40,123
N'est-ce pas?
- Non, n'est-ce pas. Cocoa.
1006
00:53:40,134 --> 00:53:42,751
- At last, we have our murder.
1007
00:53:42,761 --> 00:53:44,126
- Not quite.
1008
00:53:44,138 --> 00:53:46,971
Twain say murder victim
sitting at our table.
1009
00:53:46,974 --> 00:53:48,885
Butler not at our table.
1010
00:53:48,892 --> 00:53:52,635
Butler only killed to
divert us from real murder
1011
00:53:52,646 --> 00:53:54,307
still to come.
1012
00:53:54,314 --> 00:53:55,725
- Look.
1013
00:53:55,733 --> 00:53:56,564
- Ah.
1014
00:53:56,567 --> 00:53:57,807
- One of the knives is missing.
1015
00:53:58,777 --> 00:54:00,643
The butcher's knife, I'll wager.
1016
00:54:00,654 --> 00:54:01,940
- That means the others
are still in danger.
1017
00:54:01,947 --> 00:54:03,403
- What is exact time, please?
1018
00:54:03,407 --> 00:54:04,407
- Yes, yes.
1019
00:54:05,659 --> 00:54:08,026
11:31 and 56 seconds.
1020
00:54:08,036 --> 00:54:10,698
57, 58.
1021
00:54:10,706 --> 00:54:13,915
Tell me when to stop, 59, 60.
1022
00:54:13,917 --> 00:54:15,999
- 28 minutes to main murder.
1023
00:54:16,003 --> 00:54:17,368
Quickly back to dining room.
1024
00:54:17,379 --> 00:54:19,120
Must all be together
at midnight.
1025
00:54:21,425 --> 00:54:24,838
- Wait a minute.
1026
00:54:27,848 --> 00:54:29,304
- Hankerchief.
1027
00:54:41,320 --> 00:54:42,526
- What is it?
1028
00:54:42,529 --> 00:54:44,111
- A bill.
1029
00:54:44,114 --> 00:54:45,821
Everything he has been
arranging for tonight,
1030
00:54:45,824 --> 00:54:47,280
the butler, the cook, the food,
1031
00:54:47,284 --> 00:54:48,991
the dining room
chairs, everything.
1032
00:54:48,994 --> 00:54:50,905
- You mean?
- Yes.
1033
00:54:50,913 --> 00:54:53,905
This entire murder
has been catered.
1034
00:54:55,292 --> 00:54:56,498
- Wow.
1035
00:54:58,587 --> 00:55:00,498
- It's Twain's doing,
the man is mad.
1036
00:55:00,506 --> 00:55:01,837
- Yes, but no fool.
1037
00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:03,126
I only hope we are in time.
1038
00:55:04,384 --> 00:55:05,215
- Door locked.
1039
00:55:05,219 --> 00:55:06,960
- Sam Diamond probably
locked it from the inside
1040
00:55:06,970 --> 00:55:08,210
as a precaution.
1041
00:55:08,222 --> 00:55:10,008
- Good thinking on Diamond head.
1042
00:55:11,016 --> 00:55:13,974
- Diamond, it's Perrier,
it's all right, open up.
1043
00:55:16,188 --> 00:55:18,850
Diamond, Charleston,
are you in there?
1044
00:55:18,857 --> 00:55:20,564
- Quickly go back to kitchen,
1045
00:55:20,567 --> 00:55:23,685
get dining room key from
pocket of dead butler.
1046
00:55:23,695 --> 00:55:25,277
- You didn't have
to say dead butler.
1047
00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:27,817
It's bad enough I have to
put my hand in his pocket.
1048
00:55:41,004 --> 00:55:42,004
Holy merde.
1049
00:55:49,721 --> 00:55:53,806
- Ms. Skeffington, Ms. Skeffington, Ms.
Withers.
1050
00:55:53,809 --> 00:55:54,844
- He's gone.
1051
00:55:54,852 --> 00:55:55,683
- Who's gone?
1052
00:55:55,686 --> 00:55:56,721
- The butler, his
body is missing.
1053
00:55:56,728 --> 00:55:58,264
Here is the key.
1054
00:55:58,272 --> 00:55:59,137
- If butler gone,
1055
00:55:59,147 --> 00:56:00,228
where you find key?
1056
00:56:00,232 --> 00:56:01,597
- In his pocket.
- What pocket?
1057
00:56:01,608 --> 00:56:02,894
- The butler's pocket.
1058
00:56:02,901 --> 00:56:04,733
- Butler gone but
pocket still there?
1059
00:56:04,736 --> 00:56:06,852
- Exactly, somebody
has stolen his body
1060
00:56:06,864 --> 00:56:08,275
but left his clothes there.
1061
00:56:08,282 --> 00:56:09,864
- Quickly, open the door.
1062
00:56:09,867 --> 00:56:11,653
Something is very wrong here.
1063
00:56:11,660 --> 00:56:12,660
- Ah.
1064
00:56:17,291 --> 00:56:18,622
- Hello?
1065
00:56:18,625 --> 00:56:20,457
Where is everyone?
1066
00:56:20,460 --> 00:56:23,418
- Room filled with empty people.
1067
00:56:23,422 --> 00:56:24,878
- I'll try the other door.
1068
00:56:27,718 --> 00:56:29,629
It's locked from the inside.
1069
00:56:29,636 --> 00:56:31,798
- Strange, both doors
locked from inside,
1070
00:56:31,805 --> 00:56:32,840
yet no way out.
1071
00:56:32,848 --> 00:56:34,759
- I don't like it,
I don't like it one bit.
1072
00:56:34,766 --> 00:56:36,973
- I like it but do
not understand it.
1073
00:56:38,145 --> 00:56:41,012
Maybe other way out of
room, secret passageway.
1074
00:56:43,358 --> 00:56:47,522
- Wrong, there are no secret
passageways, Mr. Wang.
1075
00:56:47,529 --> 00:56:48,610
- You spoke?
1076
00:56:48,614 --> 00:56:50,196
- No.
- Not me.
1077
00:56:50,198 --> 00:56:51,484
- I spoke.
1078
00:56:53,201 --> 00:56:54,737
- Ah, there.
1079
00:56:54,745 --> 00:56:56,656
Voice come from cow on wall.
1080
00:56:56,663 --> 00:56:59,872
- Moose, moose, you imbecile!
1081
00:56:59,875 --> 00:57:00,910
- Where are they?
1082
00:57:00,918 --> 00:57:03,205
What have you done with the
others, you short madman?!
1083
00:57:03,211 --> 00:57:05,953
- Ah-ha, stumped already.
1084
00:57:05,964 --> 00:57:08,376
Need some clues,
Monsieur Perrier?
1085
00:57:08,383 --> 00:57:10,044
- Clues, I need
no clues from you,
1086
00:57:10,052 --> 00:57:12,760
I find my own clues,
you demented lollipop.
1087
00:57:12,763 --> 00:57:13,594
- Calm yourself.
1088
00:57:13,597 --> 00:57:14,928
Man who argue with cow on wall
1089
00:57:14,932 --> 00:57:16,343
is like train without wheels,
1090
00:57:16,350 --> 00:57:17,431
very soon get nowhere.
1091
00:57:17,434 --> 00:57:19,141
- Oh, be quiet, I'm sick
of your fortune cookies.
1092
00:57:19,144 --> 00:57:21,055
- Oh, man who is sick
of fortune cookies...
1093
00:57:21,063 --> 00:57:21,894
- Did you hear what I just said?
1094
00:57:21,897 --> 00:57:22,807
- Is like so many
Chinese restaurant.
1095
00:57:22,814 --> 00:57:23,645
- I just said I was
sick of fortune cookies.
1096
00:57:23,649 --> 00:57:24,605
- He gets sick of...
1097
00:57:24,608 --> 00:57:25,439
- Quiet, quiet, just, please.
1098
00:57:25,442 --> 00:57:26,807
- Cow talk again.
1099
00:57:26,818 --> 00:57:29,435
- In need of a hint, Ms.
Marbles?
1100
00:57:29,446 --> 00:57:31,653
"You a" mistake what you assume,
1101
00:57:31,657 --> 00:57:34,615
they never left the dining room.
1102
00:57:34,618 --> 00:57:36,780
Count the numbers one to 10,
1103
00:57:36,787 --> 00:57:40,405
turn the knob and try again.
1104
00:57:40,415 --> 00:57:42,326
- What the devil does that mean?
1105
00:57:42,334 --> 00:57:43,699
They never left the dining room.
1106
00:57:43,710 --> 00:57:44,825
Certainly they did.
1107
00:57:44,836 --> 00:57:46,668
- Do not mistake what
you assume just now,
1108
00:57:46,672 --> 00:57:47,833
quick, counting wrong.
1109
00:57:47,839 --> 00:57:48,795
- What for?
1110
00:57:48,799 --> 00:57:50,881
- We assume others not here,
1111
00:57:50,884 --> 00:57:53,091
but cow say they
are in dining room.
1112
00:57:53,095 --> 00:57:55,302
Let us look once more.
1113
00:57:58,266 --> 00:57:59,756
Please close door, Mr. Perrier.
1114
00:58:02,521 --> 00:58:03,852
- I cannot see what possibly...
1115
00:58:03,855 --> 00:58:04,845
- Please, quiet,
1116
00:58:04,856 --> 00:58:06,722
seven, eight, nine, 10.
1117
00:58:08,110 --> 00:58:11,193
Ms. Marbles, be so kind
as to open door, please.
1118
00:58:18,120 --> 00:58:18,951
- Where were you, Wang?
1119
00:58:18,954 --> 00:58:20,570
We was worried.
1120
00:58:20,580 --> 00:58:21,570
- What do you mean
where were we?
1121
00:58:21,581 --> 00:58:22,946
- Where were you?
- We were here.
1122
00:58:22,958 --> 00:58:24,744
- Didn't you say not to
leave the dining room?
1123
00:58:24,751 --> 00:58:25,786
- And you have
not left this room
1124
00:58:25,794 --> 00:58:26,750
since we were gone?
1125
00:58:26,753 --> 00:58:28,664
- Certainly not.
- No, monsieur.
1126
00:58:28,672 --> 00:58:33,508
- Answer simple but
question very hard.
1127
00:58:33,510 --> 00:58:34,545
- Where's the butler?
1128
00:58:34,553 --> 00:58:36,339
- Butler completely murdered.
1129
00:58:36,346 --> 00:58:40,556
- Poisoned, yet one of the
butcher's knives is missing.
1130
00:58:40,559 --> 00:58:42,391
- We came back
here to inform you,
1131
00:58:42,394 --> 00:58:43,759
but the doors were locked.
1132
00:58:43,770 --> 00:58:46,512
- I went back to get the key
out of the butler's pocket.
1133
00:58:46,523 --> 00:58:48,139
His body was missing.
1134
00:58:48,150 --> 00:58:49,436
He'd been stripped naked
1135
00:58:49,443 --> 00:58:51,650
and his clothes
left in his place.
1136
00:58:51,653 --> 00:58:52,859
- I don't understand.
1137
00:58:52,863 --> 00:58:56,197
Why would anybody want to
steal a dead, naked body?
1138
00:58:56,199 --> 00:58:57,985
- Well, dear, there
are people who...
1139
00:59:00,704 --> 00:59:02,490
- Oh that's tacky.
1140
00:59:02,497 --> 00:59:04,329
That's really tacky.
1141
00:59:04,332 --> 00:59:07,870
- Then we returned
here, opened the door,
1142
00:59:07,878 --> 00:59:09,664
but the room was empty.
1143
00:59:09,671 --> 00:59:10,671
You were all gone.
1144
00:59:12,424 --> 00:59:14,882
Oh, the moose head
told us not to assume
1145
00:59:14,885 --> 00:59:17,502
that you had ever
left the dining room,
1146
00:59:17,512 --> 00:59:21,426
so we counted to 10
and tried it again.
1147
00:59:22,601 --> 00:59:23,601
And here you were.
1148
00:59:24,519 --> 00:59:27,682
I'm not one to use hyperbole,
ladies and gentlemen,
1149
00:59:27,689 --> 00:59:29,305
but I'll tell you this,
1150
00:59:29,316 --> 00:59:30,681
the first time in my life,
1151
00:59:30,692 --> 00:59:32,933
I had the caca scared out of me.
1152
00:59:34,905 --> 00:59:36,020
- I like her.
1153
00:59:36,031 --> 00:59:37,487
I really like her.
1154
00:59:39,493 --> 00:59:41,279
- Gunshots, monsieur.
- Gunshots, Pop.
1155
00:59:41,286 --> 00:59:43,618
- Gunshots, Sam.
- Gunshots, Dicky.
1156
00:59:43,622 --> 00:59:45,488
- Huge.
1157
00:59:45,499 --> 00:59:47,661
- All right, this time
Charleston and I will go.
1158
00:59:47,667 --> 00:59:49,624
Everybody else stay in the room.
1159
00:59:49,628 --> 00:59:50,993
Let's go Charleston.
1160
00:59:56,551 --> 00:59:59,794
- What do you make
of all of this, Wang?
1161
01:00:02,224 --> 01:00:04,306
- Is confusing.
1162
01:00:04,309 --> 01:00:06,175
- It, it is confusing.
1163
01:00:06,186 --> 01:00:09,224
Say your goddamn pronouns.
1164
01:00:09,231 --> 01:00:10,231
- Oh.
1165
01:00:15,070 --> 01:00:16,105
- Open the door.
1166
01:00:17,906 --> 01:00:18,737
- Good god!
1167
01:00:18,740 --> 01:00:20,606
- What is it?
- He's back.
1168
01:00:24,538 --> 01:00:25,538
And au naturel.
1169
01:00:26,832 --> 01:00:27,832
- I don't get it.
1170
01:00:28,708 --> 01:00:31,040
First they steal the body
and leave the clothes,
1171
01:00:32,462 --> 01:00:35,329
then they steal the clothes
and bring the body back.
1172
01:00:35,340 --> 01:00:37,126
Who would do a thing like that?
1173
01:00:37,134 --> 01:00:39,375
- Possibly some
deranged dry cleaner.
1174
01:00:39,386 --> 01:00:41,297
- What about the gunshots?
1175
01:00:41,304 --> 01:00:42,635
Why shoot some poor slob
1176
01:00:42,639 --> 01:00:44,471
when he's already been poisoned?
1177
01:00:44,474 --> 01:00:45,839
- True, we heard the gunshots
1178
01:00:45,851 --> 01:00:47,057
but I don't see
any bullet holes,
1179
01:00:47,060 --> 01:00:49,472
not on his head, his neck,
his back, or his chest.
1180
01:00:49,479 --> 01:00:50,594
- Look allover him.
1181
01:00:51,606 --> 01:00:52,641
- All over his body?
1182
01:00:52,649 --> 01:00:54,014
- Somebody's gotta do it.
1183
01:00:54,025 --> 01:00:55,311
I'm busy standing guard.
1184
01:00:55,318 --> 01:00:57,309
- Why don't I stand guard,
you look all over the body.
1185
01:00:57,320 --> 01:00:59,231
- All right, we'll take turns.
1186
01:00:59,239 --> 01:01:00,650
You look over the
first dead, naked body
1187
01:01:00,657 --> 01:01:02,864
that we find and I'll
look over the second.
1188
01:01:06,246 --> 01:01:08,408
Hurry up, we only
got eight minutes.
1189
01:01:13,420 --> 01:01:14,420
Oh.
1190
01:01:16,631 --> 01:01:17,462
You see anything?
1191
01:01:17,465 --> 01:01:19,456
- No, I don't see a
bullet hole anywhere.
1192
01:01:21,136 --> 01:01:23,173
Hold it, I see something.
1193
01:01:23,180 --> 01:01:24,841
- What is it?
1194
01:01:24,848 --> 01:01:26,179
- Oh, forget it, my mistake.
1195
01:01:26,183 --> 01:01:27,139
Not a bullet hole.
1196
01:01:27,142 --> 01:01:29,349
- If he wasn't plugged,
what about the shots?
1197
01:01:30,520 --> 01:01:32,477
- Divide and conquer?
- What?
1198
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:33,595
- Another diversion.
1199
01:01:33,607 --> 01:01:35,723
He gives us meaningless
clues to confuse us,
1200
01:01:35,734 --> 01:01:37,725
dangles red herrings
before our eyes,
1201
01:01:37,736 --> 01:01:39,397
bedazzles us with
bizarre banalities,
1202
01:01:39,404 --> 01:01:40,894
while all the time
precious seconds
1203
01:01:40,906 --> 01:01:42,863
are ticking away towards
the truly terrible
1204
01:01:42,866 --> 01:01:44,356
murder still to come.
1205
01:01:44,367 --> 01:01:45,323
- You're good, Charleston.
1206
01:01:45,327 --> 01:01:46,488
You're not my kind of cop,
1207
01:01:46,494 --> 01:01:48,451
but you're smart
and you smell good.
1208
01:01:48,455 --> 01:01:49,911
You're not a pansy, I know that,
1209
01:01:49,915 --> 01:01:51,872
but what the hell are you?
1210
01:01:51,875 --> 01:01:53,365
- Classy, I suppose.
1211
01:01:53,376 --> 01:01:55,708
- Dames always fall for a
guy like you, don't they?
1212
01:01:55,712 --> 01:01:56,873
- I don't see what
possible interest...
1213
01:01:56,880 --> 01:01:58,120
- Did you ever make
it with a waitress?
1214
01:01:58,131 --> 01:01:59,451
- I beg your pardon.
- A waitress.
1215
01:02:00,300 --> 01:02:02,257
Big fat waitress.
1216
01:02:02,260 --> 01:02:04,217
I don't know what them
society dames are like
1217
01:02:04,221 --> 01:02:05,211
in the kip, but you
ain't never had it
1218
01:02:05,222 --> 01:02:08,135
till you made it with a
big, fat blondie waitress.
1219
01:02:09,184 --> 01:02:10,640
If you're ever interested,
1220
01:02:10,644 --> 01:02:11,644
you give me a call.
1221
01:02:17,859 --> 01:02:19,691
- Bizarre little twit.
1222
01:02:19,694 --> 01:02:21,184
- Still not sure about this guy.
1223
01:02:29,246 --> 01:02:30,281
What are you doing?
1224
01:02:30,288 --> 01:02:32,529
- I had to wash
my hands after...
1225
01:02:32,540 --> 01:02:33,371
- Good.
1226
01:02:33,375 --> 01:02:34,206
- I'll be out in a minute.
1227
01:02:34,209 --> 01:02:36,075
- I'll go ahead,
I'll tell the others.
1228
01:02:38,213 --> 01:02:40,329
Well, you're never gonna
believe this, folks.
1229
01:02:41,800 --> 01:02:43,666
All right, where are you?
1230
01:02:43,677 --> 01:02:45,259
What the hell is going on here?
1231
01:02:46,596 --> 01:02:48,712
Charleston, wash up
later, we got problems.
1232
01:02:55,438 --> 01:02:56,553
Locked from the inside.
1233
01:02:59,776 --> 01:03:01,266
That can only mean one thing,
1234
01:03:02,862 --> 01:03:05,320
and I don't know what it is.
1235
01:03:05,323 --> 01:03:06,323
Charleston.
1236
01:03:11,288 --> 01:03:12,744
You're never gonna believe...
1237
01:03:23,216 --> 01:03:24,752
- I said I'd be out in a minute.
1238
01:03:33,143 --> 01:03:34,929
- I don't remember
closing that door.
1239
01:03:42,110 --> 01:03:43,396
- What happened?
1240
01:03:45,864 --> 01:03:48,777
- What were the gun shots?
1241
01:03:51,202 --> 01:03:53,034
- Did anybody leave this
room since we were gone?
1242
01:03:53,038 --> 01:03:55,405
- So it happened to
you, too, Mr. Diamond?
1243
01:03:55,415 --> 01:03:56,530
- Where's my Dicky?
1244
01:03:57,959 --> 01:03:59,825
Sorry, where's my husband?
1245
01:03:59,836 --> 01:04:01,372
- Two minutes to midnight,
1246
01:04:01,379 --> 01:04:03,336
in case anyone is interested.
1247
01:04:03,340 --> 01:04:05,502
- It ain't possible,
I'm telling you.
1248
01:04:05,508 --> 01:04:06,964
Eight people in a dining room,
1249
01:04:06,968 --> 01:04:10,506
can't turn into an
empty room unless...
1250
01:04:10,513 --> 01:04:11,844
- Unless what Sam?
1251
01:04:11,848 --> 01:04:13,680
- Unless it never happened.
1252
01:04:13,683 --> 01:04:15,424
- I see your point, Diamond.
1253
01:04:15,435 --> 01:04:17,517
When is a dining room
filled with people
1254
01:04:17,520 --> 01:04:19,261
not a dining room
filled with people.
1255
01:04:19,272 --> 01:04:20,979
- When there's two dining rooms?
1256
01:04:20,982 --> 01:04:22,143
- Exactly.
1257
01:04:22,150 --> 01:04:23,857
- Two dining rooms.
1258
01:04:23,860 --> 01:04:25,646
- Two dining rooms,
two of everything.
1259
01:04:25,653 --> 01:04:27,894
Twain, electronic genius.
1260
01:04:27,906 --> 01:04:30,523
- He has devised a
way to move this room
1261
01:04:30,533 --> 01:04:33,321
quickly and silently
in the flash of an eye,
1262
01:04:33,328 --> 01:04:36,320
to be replaced by an exact
duplicate of this very room.
1263
01:04:36,331 --> 01:04:37,571
- I knew it all the time.
1264
01:04:37,582 --> 01:04:38,993
- Oh please.
1265
01:04:39,000 --> 01:04:40,206
I shall demonstrate.
1266
01:04:40,210 --> 01:04:42,417
I shall walk out
the door, close it,
1267
01:04:42,420 --> 01:04:43,626
knock three times, enter,
1268
01:04:43,630 --> 01:04:45,837
and you will all
be gone, observe.
1269
01:04:45,840 --> 01:04:46,840
M-hm, m-hm, m-hm.
1270
01:04:53,056 --> 01:04:54,763
- I have it all figured out.
1271
01:04:54,766 --> 01:04:56,848
There are two of everything.
1272
01:04:56,851 --> 01:04:59,092
- Oh, Dicky, that's old news.
1273
01:04:59,104 --> 01:05:01,345
- All right, everybody
take their seats.
1274
01:05:01,356 --> 01:05:03,142
- I'm scared, Sam, hold me.
1275
01:05:03,149 --> 01:05:04,435
- Hold yourself, I'm busy.
1276
01:05:05,485 --> 01:05:07,772
Take the same seats
you had before.
1277
01:05:07,779 --> 01:05:08,894
- 40 seconds.
1278
01:05:08,905 --> 01:05:11,146
I'm very worried about
Monsieur Perrier.
1279
01:05:11,157 --> 01:05:12,739
- I'm going to look for him.
1280
01:05:12,742 --> 01:05:15,234
- No, sit please, no
one to leave room.
1281
01:05:16,871 --> 01:05:18,032
- That's the other door.
1282
01:05:22,669 --> 01:05:24,535
- It's locked, I can't open it.
1283
01:05:24,546 --> 01:05:27,083
- Hurry man, we have 15 seconds.
1284
01:05:27,090 --> 01:05:28,672
- Move your hand, chauffeur.
1285
01:05:34,013 --> 01:05:35,128
- Don't ask.
1286
01:05:35,140 --> 01:05:36,722
- What are you doing in
the butler's uniform?
1287
01:05:36,724 --> 01:05:38,681
- I said don't ask me.
1288
01:05:38,685 --> 01:05:39,675
I don't know.
1289
01:05:39,686 --> 01:05:41,051
It all happened too quickly.
1290
01:05:43,064 --> 01:05:44,350
- The cook.
1291
01:05:44,357 --> 01:05:45,688
Where is the cook?
1292
01:05:46,943 --> 01:05:49,275
- She's gone.
- Never said a word.
1293
01:05:49,279 --> 01:05:50,314
- 10 more seconds.
1294
01:05:50,321 --> 01:05:51,903
Quickly, sit and join hands.
1295
01:05:55,410 --> 01:05:59,449
- Impossible for murder to
happen now without witnesses.
1296
01:05:59,456 --> 01:06:01,197
- Three, two, one.
1297
01:06:33,323 --> 01:06:34,939
It's over.
1298
01:06:34,949 --> 01:06:36,656
We're safe and sound.
1299
01:06:40,955 --> 01:06:42,866
- Oh, that's probably
the cook, come in.
1300
01:06:42,874 --> 01:06:44,990
- Darling, the poor
woman is stone deaf.
1301
01:06:45,001 --> 01:06:47,117
- I'm sorry, I forgot, come in.
1302
01:06:48,963 --> 01:06:50,954
- Not sound like cook to me.
1303
01:07:06,147 --> 01:07:07,262
Ah, Mr. Twain.
1304
01:07:09,359 --> 01:07:11,942
You appear to be wrong.
1305
01:07:11,945 --> 01:07:14,061
Nobody here murdered.
1306
01:07:14,072 --> 01:07:15,072
Please to come in.
1307
01:07:21,704 --> 01:07:23,365
- Is he dead?
1308
01:07:23,373 --> 01:07:24,579
- With a thing like
that in his back,
1309
01:07:24,582 --> 01:07:26,164
in the long run,
he's better off.
1310
01:07:26,167 --> 01:07:27,077
- Touch nothing!
1311
01:07:27,085 --> 01:07:28,371
- Will you stop
saying, touch nothing.
1312
01:07:28,378 --> 01:07:30,619
We're all experienced
criminologists.
1313
01:07:30,630 --> 01:07:32,712
I find it insulting,
debasing and redundant,
1314
01:07:32,715 --> 01:07:34,797
to keep telling us
to touch nothing.
1315
01:07:34,801 --> 01:07:35,711
- Oh, be quiet, woman.
1316
01:07:35,718 --> 01:07:37,254
- Up yours, fellow.
1317
01:07:37,262 --> 01:07:39,720
- Most amusing,
bickering detectives,
1318
01:07:39,722 --> 01:07:42,054
like making giant lamb stew,
1319
01:07:42,058 --> 01:07:43,640
everything goes to pot.
1320
01:07:43,643 --> 01:07:44,883
- Why don't you stop it.
- Be quiet.
1321
01:07:44,894 --> 01:07:46,134
- Please be quiet.
- I am.
1322
01:07:46,145 --> 01:07:47,260
I want you to know.
1323
01:07:48,314 --> 01:07:50,681
- Shut up, all of
youse, nobody move.
1324
01:07:50,692 --> 01:07:52,308
Stay where you are, everybody.
1325
01:07:52,318 --> 01:07:53,228
- What is it?
1326
01:07:53,236 --> 01:07:54,818
- I have to go to the can again.
1327
01:07:54,821 --> 01:07:56,152
I don't wanna miss nothing.
1328
01:07:57,407 --> 01:07:58,613
- I'm going, too, Sam.
1329
01:08:01,244 --> 01:08:03,986
- I'd rather do this
alone, Tess, thanks anyway.
1330
01:08:08,167 --> 01:08:09,167
- The cook?
1331
01:08:10,628 --> 01:08:11,993
- What darling?
1332
01:08:12,005 --> 01:08:12,915
- Well, it's obvious.
1333
01:08:12,922 --> 01:08:14,504
The cook murdered him.
1334
01:08:14,507 --> 01:08:15,542
The butler's dead,
all the rest of us
1335
01:08:15,550 --> 01:08:17,882
are in this room except for her.
1336
01:08:17,885 --> 01:08:18,875
No one else could get in or out,
1337
01:08:18,886 --> 01:08:21,969
so that only leaves the
cook, isn't that right?
1338
01:08:21,973 --> 01:08:22,804
- Wrong.
1339
01:08:22,807 --> 01:08:25,390
- Oh, what makes you
certain of this, Sam?
1340
01:08:25,393 --> 01:08:27,725
- To drive a knife that
far up a man's back,
1341
01:08:27,729 --> 01:08:29,970
you need a powerful right arm,
1342
01:08:29,981 --> 01:08:32,348
and this arm don't
look that strong to me.
1343
01:08:33,401 --> 01:08:34,641
- Is that the cook's arm?
1344
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:36,518
- It ain't the
pussycat's tail, lady.
1345
01:08:36,529 --> 01:08:37,735
- Oh.
1346
01:08:37,739 --> 01:08:40,572
- Oh don't be alarmed,
miss, it ain't real.
1347
01:08:40,575 --> 01:08:42,486
For that matter,
neither is the cook.
1348
01:08:44,912 --> 01:08:47,119
I found this before
I got to the can.
1349
01:08:50,126 --> 01:08:53,084
Got a little surprise
for you folks.
1350
01:08:57,842 --> 01:08:58,798
- The cook.
- A mannequin.
1351
01:08:58,801 --> 01:08:59,962
- No.
1352
01:08:59,969 --> 01:09:01,630
A dummy.
1353
01:09:01,638 --> 01:09:03,845
Perfect in every detail
with the exception
1354
01:09:03,848 --> 01:09:05,964
of not being able to
make her hear or speak.
1355
01:09:07,101 --> 01:09:10,435
My hat's off to the man
with the shiv in his back.
1356
01:09:10,438 --> 01:09:11,678
Except for the fact
that he's dead,
1357
01:09:11,689 --> 01:09:12,804
he was no dope.
1358
01:09:12,815 --> 01:09:14,397
- Nice going, Sam.
1359
01:09:14,400 --> 01:09:17,142
- I hope you all realize
that someone in this room
1360
01:09:17,153 --> 01:09:18,153
is a murderer.
1361
01:09:19,572 --> 01:09:21,313
- For sake of ladies present,
1362
01:09:21,324 --> 01:09:23,531
may I suggest that we a"
return to drawing room.
1363
01:09:23,534 --> 01:09:26,071
My son will cover up
remains of Mr. Twain.
1364
01:09:26,079 --> 01:09:27,444
- Why do I do all
the dirty work, Pop?
1365
01:09:27,455 --> 01:09:29,787
- Because your mother
not here to do it.
1366
01:09:29,791 --> 01:09:31,373
Come please.
1367
01:09:45,765 --> 01:09:47,005
- Give me the bottle, Sam.
1368
01:09:47,016 --> 01:09:48,016
- Excuse me.
1369
01:09:55,066 --> 01:09:56,807
- Been getting a
headache, Dicky,
1370
01:09:56,818 --> 01:09:58,274
isn't there some
way of turning off
1371
01:09:58,277 --> 01:10:00,314
that ridiculous machine.
1372
01:10:00,321 --> 01:10:02,483
- Maybe some gadget
outside the window.
1373
01:10:08,663 --> 01:10:11,030
Sorry, darling, it's
raining this time.
1374
01:10:11,040 --> 01:10:13,372
- I suggest we get down to
business and sort the facts.
1375
01:10:13,376 --> 01:10:15,208
It is now 12:30 Sunday morning.
1376
01:10:16,295 --> 01:10:19,083
The doors and windows will
automatically open at dawn,
1377
01:10:19,090 --> 01:10:22,333
and one of us here will be
one million dollars richer,
1378
01:10:22,343 --> 01:10:24,755
and one of us will be going
to the gas chamber to be hung.
1379
01:10:24,762 --> 01:10:26,969
- One, Monsieur Perrier.
1380
01:10:26,973 --> 01:10:28,134
Why not two?
1381
01:10:28,141 --> 01:10:29,927
We all have associates?
1382
01:10:29,934 --> 01:10:31,766
- Why not four or six or eight?
1383
01:10:31,769 --> 01:10:33,351
I don't trust any of youse.
1384
01:10:33,354 --> 01:10:35,971
Maybe I'm just a patsy being
set up to take the fall,
1385
01:10:35,982 --> 01:10:38,223
but I'm not falling for
any of you, you understand?
1386
01:10:38,234 --> 01:10:39,349
- Not even me, Sam?
1387
01:10:40,486 --> 01:10:42,102
- Why don't you fall in
love with the Jap kid
1388
01:10:42,113 --> 01:10:43,274
and get off my back.
1389
01:10:44,282 --> 01:10:46,649
- Can we get back
to case, please.
1390
01:10:46,659 --> 01:10:47,694
Time is late,
1391
01:10:47,702 --> 01:10:50,194
and my eyes are getting tired.
1392
01:10:50,204 --> 01:10:52,070
- I thought they always
looked like that.
1393
01:10:52,081 --> 01:10:53,697
- Knock if off, Sam.
1394
01:10:53,708 --> 01:10:56,291
- I apologize, this case
is getting on my nerves.
1395
01:10:56,294 --> 01:10:57,409
I'm sorry, Slanty.
1396
01:10:58,379 --> 01:10:59,210
- Thank you.
1397
01:10:59,213 --> 01:11:01,671
Now then, facts, please, facts.
1398
01:11:01,674 --> 01:11:03,290
Mr. Twain predicts murder,
1399
01:11:03,301 --> 01:11:07,215
also predicts victim to be
at dining table, correct?
1400
01:11:07,221 --> 01:11:08,427
- Correct.
1401
01:11:08,431 --> 01:11:10,798
- I'm sorry darling, this
is official, correct.
1402
01:11:10,808 --> 01:11:13,641
- Also predicts murder
to take place at midnight
1403
01:11:13,644 --> 01:11:15,931
and predicts number
of stab wounds.
1404
01:11:15,938 --> 01:11:19,272
How can this be if he not in
collaboration with murderer?
1405
01:11:19,275 --> 01:11:21,061
- What if Twain did it himself?
1406
01:11:21,068 --> 01:11:22,729
- Murdered himself?
1407
01:11:22,737 --> 01:11:24,353
For what possible reason?
1408
01:11:25,490 --> 01:11:26,696
And how?
1409
01:11:26,699 --> 01:11:29,191
- The motive is simple; ego.
1410
01:11:29,202 --> 01:11:30,863
If we were not to
solve this crime,
1411
01:11:30,870 --> 01:11:33,783
he would indeed be named the
world's foremost detective,
1412
01:11:33,790 --> 01:11:35,121
and with an ego like his,
1413
01:11:35,124 --> 01:11:36,034
the fact that he
had to die for it
1414
01:11:36,042 --> 01:11:38,500
would be a small price to pay.
1415
01:11:38,503 --> 01:11:41,621
As to how, any man who
can create this chamber
1416
01:11:41,631 --> 01:11:43,121
of electronic marvels
1417
01:11:43,132 --> 01:11:45,169
would certainly be able
to devise a machine
1418
01:11:45,176 --> 01:11:47,759
that would stab himself in
the back 11 or 12 times.
1419
01:11:47,762 --> 01:11:49,503
- That was wonderful, darling.
1420
01:11:49,514 --> 01:11:51,801
I'm so proud of you,
let's go to bed, quickly.
1421
01:11:51,808 --> 01:11:53,219
- One moment, please.
1422
01:11:53,226 --> 01:11:56,389
Very interesting
theory, Mr. Charleston,
1423
01:11:56,395 --> 01:11:59,729
but you overlook one
very important point.
1424
01:11:59,732 --> 01:12:01,018
- And that is?
1425
01:12:01,025 --> 01:12:02,561
- It's stupid.
1426
01:12:02,568 --> 01:12:06,277
It most stupid
theory I ever heard.
1427
01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:07,361
- Do you have a better one?
1428
01:12:07,365 --> 01:12:10,073
- Oh, yeah, much better one.
1429
01:12:10,076 --> 01:12:13,364
You see, I have been doing
my homework, Mr. Charleston.
1430
01:12:13,371 --> 01:12:15,988
For example, I have information
1431
01:12:15,998 --> 01:12:18,865
that your wife's
portfolio of stocks
1432
01:12:18,876 --> 01:12:22,460
was seriously depleted in
latest financial crisis.
1433
01:12:22,463 --> 01:12:25,080
In short, you are flat
broke, Mr. Charleston.
1434
01:12:25,091 --> 01:12:27,207
You have been borrowing
money for over two years
1435
01:12:27,218 --> 01:12:30,461
at 17% interest from
Mr. Lionel Twain.
1436
01:12:30,471 --> 01:12:32,303
- Broke, Dicky, is this true?
1437
01:12:32,306 --> 01:12:33,512
- I didn't want to
tell you now, darling,
1438
01:12:33,516 --> 01:12:35,507
I was saving it
for your birthday.
1439
01:12:35,518 --> 01:12:39,887
- One million dollars would
buy great many tight suits,
1440
01:12:39,897 --> 01:12:41,137
would it not, Mr. Charleston?
1441
01:12:41,148 --> 01:12:42,309
- Now see here, Wang...
1442
01:12:42,316 --> 01:12:44,057
- What, dead broke, Dicky?
1443
01:12:44,068 --> 01:12:45,183
- Almost, darling.
1444
01:12:45,194 --> 01:12:47,310
I have $1.17 and some stamps,
1445
01:12:47,321 --> 01:12:48,436
but I did not
murder Lionel Twain.
1446
01:12:48,447 --> 01:12:50,814
Now you do believe
that, don't you darling?
1447
01:12:50,825 --> 01:12:52,657
- We'll talk, we'll see.
1448
01:12:53,619 --> 01:12:55,530
- It could have
been any one of you.
1449
01:12:55,538 --> 01:12:56,573
Each and every one of us
1450
01:12:56,581 --> 01:12:58,868
was out of that dining room
at one time or another,
1451
01:12:58,875 --> 01:13:01,207
giving ample opportunity
to commit the crime.
1452
01:13:02,420 --> 01:13:03,455
As for motives,
1453
01:13:03,462 --> 01:13:06,250
there's more than ego
and cash involved.
1454
01:13:06,257 --> 01:13:07,998
For example, revenge.
1455
01:13:08,009 --> 01:13:10,046
- Meaning what, Mr. Charleston?
1456
01:13:10,052 --> 01:13:11,884
- Meaning that I'm
not the only one here
1457
01:13:11,888 --> 01:13:14,505
who's had a past
experience with Mr. Twain.
1458
01:13:14,515 --> 01:13:17,678
Did you know that he was
quite a ladies man in his day?
1459
01:13:17,685 --> 01:13:19,767
- Are you suggesting
that someone here...
1460
01:13:19,770 --> 01:13:22,137
- Was at one time in
love with Lionel Twain,
1461
01:13:22,148 --> 01:13:24,185
as a matter of fact,
he was engaged to
1462
01:13:24,191 --> 01:13:27,149
and jilted Ms. Jessica Marbles.
1463
01:13:28,779 --> 01:13:30,645
Mon dieu!
1464
01:13:30,656 --> 01:13:32,988
- Jesus H. Christ.
1465
01:13:32,992 --> 01:13:35,324
- Jilted 54 years
ago at the altar,
1466
01:13:35,328 --> 01:13:37,660
left her there in that
same baggy tweed outfit.
1467
01:13:39,332 --> 01:13:40,493
- Is this true, Jessie?
1468
01:13:40,499 --> 01:13:42,285
- I was not jilted.
1469
01:13:42,293 --> 01:13:44,284
I walked out on him.
1470
01:13:44,295 --> 01:13:47,162
He wanted to fool around
before the wedding.
1471
01:13:47,173 --> 01:13:50,586
- And being the lady
you are, you refused.
1472
01:13:50,593 --> 01:13:52,129
- Not completely.
1473
01:13:52,136 --> 01:13:54,218
But it got out of hand.
1474
01:13:54,221 --> 01:13:56,178
He was horrid but
I didn't kill him.
1475
01:13:56,182 --> 01:13:57,092
- That's good enough for me.
1476
01:13:57,099 --> 01:13:59,090
What about you, Frenchie?
1477
01:13:59,101 --> 01:14:00,341
- I'm not a Frenchie.
1478
01:14:00,353 --> 01:14:01,353
I'm a Belgie.
1479
01:14:03,481 --> 01:14:05,563
And as for other motives,
1480
01:14:05,566 --> 01:14:07,648
how about patricide?
1481
01:14:07,652 --> 01:14:10,895
- The killing of
one's own parent?
1482
01:14:10,905 --> 01:14:12,361
Mean that Lionel
Twain was the father
1483
01:14:12,365 --> 01:14:13,821
of someone in this room?
1484
01:14:15,076 --> 01:14:16,407
- He wasn't my father.
1485
01:14:18,579 --> 01:14:19,579
He was my uncle.
1486
01:14:21,624 --> 01:14:23,080
He was very good to me,
1487
01:14:23,084 --> 01:14:25,746
he would take me to the
circus and give me candy.
1488
01:14:26,712 --> 01:14:29,249
We stopped going
when I was about 26.
1489
01:14:32,885 --> 01:14:34,375
I'm sorry, Sam.
1490
01:14:34,387 --> 01:14:35,752
- 26?
1491
01:14:35,763 --> 01:14:37,379
What the hell kind
of a circus was it?
1492
01:14:37,390 --> 01:14:40,428
- Forgive me, but I was
talking about patricide,
1493
01:14:40,434 --> 01:14:41,970
not unclecide.
1494
01:14:41,978 --> 01:14:44,686
Mr. Twain may have been your uncle, Ms.
Skeffington,
1495
01:14:44,689 --> 01:14:46,680
but he was the
illegitimate father
1496
01:14:46,691 --> 01:14:49,274
of Monsieur Sidney Wang.
1497
01:14:52,279 --> 01:14:53,360
- It's not true.
1498
01:14:54,782 --> 01:14:56,318
I was adopted.
1499
01:14:56,325 --> 01:14:57,325
I have my papers.
1500
01:14:58,160 --> 01:15:02,074
"That is why I have
adopted a" my children.
1501
01:15:02,081 --> 01:15:03,788
- I was wondering.
1502
01:15:03,791 --> 01:15:04,872
- Oh.
1503
01:15:04,875 --> 01:15:07,082
He loved me very much,
1504
01:15:07,086 --> 01:15:10,295
but he was not very observant.
1505
01:15:10,297 --> 01:15:13,255
One day, when I was 19,
1506
01:15:13,259 --> 01:15:15,216
he called me to his study,
1507
01:15:15,219 --> 01:15:17,836
noticed for first
time I was Oriental
1508
01:15:17,847 --> 01:15:19,463
and kicked me out of house.
1509
01:15:19,473 --> 01:15:21,089
I could have-
1510
01:15:21,100 --> 01:15:22,306
- Killed him, Monsieur Wang.
1511
01:15:22,309 --> 01:15:24,516
- As easily as you, Mr. Perrier,
1512
01:15:24,520 --> 01:15:26,636
Lionel Twain killed
the only thing
1513
01:15:26,647 --> 01:15:30,231
you ever loved,
Mary Louise Cotille.
1514
01:15:44,790 --> 01:15:45,790
- Your sweetheart?
1515
01:15:49,295 --> 01:15:50,295
- My poodle.
1516
01:15:52,590 --> 01:15:54,206
He was a most cruel man.
1517
01:15:56,052 --> 01:15:59,795
Monsieur Twain would come
to France every season,
1518
01:16:01,390 --> 01:16:02,390
to hunt poodles.
1519
01:16:04,518 --> 01:16:08,261
The day they brought her
bloodied sequin collar to me,
1520
01:16:08,272 --> 01:16:09,933
I vowed one day I would...
1521
01:16:09,940 --> 01:16:10,725
- Knock him off.
1522
01:16:10,733 --> 01:16:12,440
- Yes, gladly if
I had the chance.
1523
01:16:14,570 --> 01:16:15,570
But I did not.
1524
01:16:16,614 --> 01:16:18,525
Someone here beat me to it.
1525
01:16:18,532 --> 01:16:19,943
- So there's more
than one reason
1526
01:16:19,950 --> 01:16:21,361
that we was invited here.
1527
01:16:22,453 --> 01:16:26,071
Not only was Twain testing
our skills as detectives,
1528
01:16:26,082 --> 01:16:27,743
but we all have
legitimate motives
1529
01:16:27,750 --> 01:16:29,206
for doing the old man in.
1530
01:16:29,210 --> 01:16:32,578
- I've not yet heard
your motive, Mr. Diamond.
1531
01:16:32,588 --> 01:16:33,999
- My motive is unimportant.
1532
01:16:35,257 --> 01:16:38,545
Let's just say that I hated
him enough to kill him.
1533
01:16:38,552 --> 01:16:41,214
- You are closed
man, Mr. Diamond.
1534
01:16:41,222 --> 01:16:43,805
You hide many things.
1535
01:16:43,808 --> 01:16:48,097
Could it be that Mr. Twain
discover your secret?
1536
01:16:48,104 --> 01:16:51,096
- I don't know what
you're talking about.
1537
01:16:51,107 --> 01:16:54,020
- We know different, do we not, Ms.
Skeffington.
1538
01:16:58,114 --> 01:16:59,855
- Twain picked up
Sam in a gay bar.
1539
01:17:01,033 --> 01:17:02,649
- I was working on a case.
1540
01:17:04,036 --> 01:17:06,403
- Every night for sixth months.
1541
01:17:06,413 --> 01:17:08,495
- I got 50 bucks
a day in expenses.
1542
01:17:08,499 --> 01:17:09,660
I hate them queeries.
1543
01:17:11,293 --> 01:17:16,333
- Twain had Polaroid
pictures of Sam in drag.
1544
01:17:16,340 --> 01:17:18,172
- I was in disguise.
1545
01:17:18,175 --> 01:17:20,337
Lots of dames go
in those joints.
1546
01:17:20,344 --> 01:17:22,506
I never kissed nobody,
1547
01:17:22,513 --> 01:17:24,095
and I never did nothing to a man
1548
01:17:24,098 --> 01:17:25,839
that I wouldn't do to a woman,
1549
01:17:25,850 --> 01:17:27,340
and I didn't kill Twain.
1550
01:17:30,980 --> 01:17:31,980
Bitch.
1551
01:17:32,940 --> 01:17:34,897
- Most interesting.
1552
01:17:34,900 --> 01:17:37,938
All had perfect motives
for killing Twain.
1553
01:17:39,113 --> 01:17:41,650
Wonder which one
was one who done it?
1554
01:17:43,576 --> 01:17:46,113
- We still have the
night to get through.
1555
01:17:46,120 --> 01:17:48,282
If anyone is going
to solve this case,
1556
01:17:48,289 --> 01:17:50,576
I say we all get a
good night's sleep.
1557
01:17:50,583 --> 01:17:53,496
"- And I suggest we
a" lock our doors.
1558
01:17:53,502 --> 01:17:55,960
One of us is a mad killer,
1559
01:17:55,963 --> 01:17:58,295
not to be trusted.
1560
01:18:39,632 --> 01:18:40,632
- Pop.
1561
01:18:41,926 --> 01:18:43,508
- Yeah?
1562
01:18:43,510 --> 01:18:45,217
- Who do you think
is the murderer?
1563
01:18:46,138 --> 01:18:48,004
- Must sleep on it.
1564
01:18:48,015 --> 01:18:51,224
Will know in morning
when wake up.
1565
01:18:51,227 --> 01:18:53,013
- But what if you don't wake up.
1566
01:18:54,146 --> 01:18:55,146
- Then you did it.
1567
01:18:56,357 --> 01:18:57,357
Go sleep, please.
1568
01:18:59,693 --> 01:19:01,058
- Goodnight, Dad.
1569
01:19:01,070 --> 01:19:03,186
- Shut up, adopted pussy cat.
1570
01:19:12,039 --> 01:19:14,906
- Should I turn
off the steam, Pop?
1571
01:19:16,252 --> 01:19:17,252
- Not steam.
1572
01:19:18,629 --> 01:19:21,621
Someone just put deadly
snake in the room.
1573
01:19:22,633 --> 01:19:24,340
Wake me when it come near bed.
1574
01:19:28,764 --> 01:19:30,380
- I want you to
know, Dicky, darling,
1575
01:19:30,391 --> 01:19:32,382
that if you're the murderer,
1576
01:19:32,393 --> 01:19:33,393
I'll still love you.
1577
01:19:34,270 --> 01:19:36,637
I don't think it would be
right for us to make love,
1578
01:19:36,647 --> 01:19:38,558
but I'd still love you.
1579
01:19:38,565 --> 01:19:39,805
- No fear of that, my pet.
1580
01:19:41,026 --> 01:19:42,312
Now let's see what we have here.
1581
01:19:42,319 --> 01:19:45,107
We have one missing,
dead, naked butler,
1582
01:19:46,198 --> 01:19:48,405
one host with a butchers
knife in his back,
1583
01:19:49,285 --> 01:19:52,277
and one poisonous scorpion
crawling up our sheets.
1584
01:19:52,288 --> 01:19:53,619
- Is that what that is?
1585
01:19:53,622 --> 01:19:55,579
- Yes, they can kill instantly.
1586
01:19:55,582 --> 01:19:57,493
I suggest we don't move.
1587
01:19:59,128 --> 01:20:00,539
- For how long?
1588
01:20:00,546 --> 01:20:03,038
- Quite possibly for
the rest of our lives.
1589
01:20:07,594 --> 01:20:09,176
- Good heavens.
1590
01:20:09,179 --> 01:20:11,295
I know who the murderer is.
1591
01:20:11,307 --> 01:20:12,672
- Solvey-poo?
1592
01:20:12,683 --> 01:20:16,301
- Yes, Ms. Withers,
the murderer is...
1593
01:20:16,312 --> 01:20:18,394
Good god, gas!
1594
01:20:18,397 --> 01:20:21,059
- I'm sorry, I can't
help it, I'm old.
1595
01:20:21,066 --> 01:20:23,774
- No, no, the other kind of gas.
1596
01:20:23,777 --> 01:20:25,609
The kind that kills.
1597
01:20:25,612 --> 01:20:27,194
- Sometimes my gas.
1598
01:20:27,197 --> 01:20:29,609
- It's seeping in
through the vent.
1599
01:20:39,376 --> 01:20:41,868
It's locked from the outside.
1600
01:20:42,713 --> 01:20:44,124
Help!
1601
01:20:44,131 --> 01:20:45,997
- Doesn't smell that bad to me.
1602
01:20:48,135 --> 01:20:50,092
- Help!
1603
01:21:02,024 --> 01:21:05,187
- Did I do right, Sam, telling
them about the gay bar?
1604
01:21:06,153 --> 01:21:08,064
- Perfect, sweetheart.
1605
01:21:08,072 --> 01:21:10,154
They took the bait
like a dumb halibut.
1606
01:21:10,157 --> 01:21:11,898
Let them think I'm a pansy.
1607
01:21:11,909 --> 01:21:13,365
While they're busy
suspecting me,
1608
01:21:13,369 --> 01:21:15,326
one of them is gonna
let his pants down.
1609
01:21:18,123 --> 01:21:20,160
- Sam, why do you
keep all those naked
1610
01:21:20,167 --> 01:21:22,454
muscleman magazines
in your office?
1611
01:21:22,461 --> 01:21:23,792
- Suspects.
1612
01:21:23,796 --> 01:21:25,457
Always looking for suspects.
1613
01:21:27,049 --> 01:21:28,835
What's that ticking
sound I hear?
1614
01:21:37,476 --> 01:21:39,308
That ticking sound
you hear, Mr. Diamond,
1615
01:21:39,311 --> 01:21:40,426
is a bomb in your room
1616
01:21:40,437 --> 01:21:41,893
that will go off in 30 seconds,
1617
01:21:41,897 --> 01:21:43,262
signed the murderer.
1618
01:21:43,273 --> 01:21:44,479
- Quick, Sam, the door.
1619
01:21:44,483 --> 01:21:46,224
- PS, the door is locked.
1620
01:21:53,826 --> 01:21:55,237
I'm sorry about this, Tess.
1621
01:21:56,203 --> 01:21:59,241
And me owing you
all that money, too.
1622
01:21:59,248 --> 01:22:00,113
- Well, that's all right, Sam,
1623
01:22:00,124 --> 01:22:01,455
what are we gonna do?
1624
01:22:01,458 --> 01:22:02,458
- I got an idea.
1625
01:22:03,419 --> 01:22:05,581
I don't know whether this
is gonna work or not.
1626
01:22:05,587 --> 01:22:07,203
Quick, turn around.
1627
01:22:07,214 --> 01:22:08,045
- I'm turned, Sam.
1628
01:22:08,048 --> 01:22:09,709
- Whatever you do,
baby, don't turn back.
1629
01:22:09,716 --> 01:22:11,957
- But Sam, if anything...
- Do as I say, angel.
1630
01:22:11,969 --> 01:22:13,050
- I will, Sam.
1631
01:22:13,053 --> 01:22:13,884
- Good.
1632
01:22:13,887 --> 01:22:16,925
'Cause I think I'm gonna cry.
1633
01:22:16,932 --> 01:22:20,300
I knew this day, I'm
having a bad day.
1634
01:22:32,156 --> 01:22:33,942
- What are you doing in my bed?
1635
01:22:33,949 --> 01:22:35,485
- Well, there's no place
else to sleep, monsieur.
1636
01:22:35,492 --> 01:22:37,529
- Sleep in the car, you
chauffeur, you, go, go, go, go.
1637
01:22:37,536 --> 01:22:39,368
- Oh, you are unfair.
1638
01:22:39,371 --> 01:22:41,362
I will tell everyone
that you wear a toupee.
1639
01:22:41,373 --> 01:22:42,204
- They already know.
1640
01:22:42,207 --> 01:22:44,369
- Then why do you wear it?
1641
01:22:44,376 --> 01:22:45,992
- I didn't know that you knew.
1642
01:22:46,003 --> 01:22:49,746
- Certainly I know,
a terrible toupee.
1643
01:22:53,177 --> 01:22:55,509
- A bomb, across the hall.
1644
01:22:55,512 --> 01:22:57,753
Quickly, the door, the door.
1645
01:23:03,979 --> 01:23:06,516
- It's locked from the outside.
1646
01:23:06,523 --> 01:23:08,810
- You look taller to me.
1647
01:23:08,817 --> 01:23:10,399
Why is that?
1648
01:23:10,402 --> 01:23:11,233
- I don't understand, monsieur.
1649
01:23:11,236 --> 01:23:12,772
I'm not getting taller.
1650
01:23:12,779 --> 01:23:15,191
- If you are not getting taller.
1651
01:23:15,199 --> 01:23:16,985
There is only one alternative.
1652
01:23:16,992 --> 01:23:19,108
The room is getting shorter.
1653
01:23:20,746 --> 01:23:22,657
- Oh mon dieu, the
ceiling is coming down.
1654
01:23:34,092 --> 01:23:34,923
What will we do?
1655
01:23:34,927 --> 01:23:36,133
- I don't know.
1656
01:23:37,012 --> 01:23:41,131
But this is exactly how
they make goose liver pate.
1657
01:24:13,257 --> 01:24:18,002
- Not so fast, please, do
not cross out Wang name,
1658
01:24:18,011 --> 01:24:20,343
cross out snake instead.
1659
01:24:21,306 --> 01:24:23,172
- Nice shot, Pop.
1660
01:24:23,183 --> 01:24:26,096
Sure wish you weren't
such a heavy sleeper.
1661
01:24:26,103 --> 01:24:27,103
- And now,
1662
01:24:28,814 --> 01:24:29,814
if you please.
1663
01:24:31,275 --> 01:24:34,563
One million dollars,
Mr. Bensonmum.
1664
01:24:36,113 --> 01:24:37,444
- Banzai, Pop.
1665
01:24:39,241 --> 01:24:41,653
- Very clever of you, Mr. Wang.
1666
01:24:41,660 --> 01:24:45,073
Oh, yes, as you
can see, I can see.
1667
01:24:46,248 --> 01:24:48,239
- So I see.
1668
01:24:48,250 --> 01:24:50,662
- Tell me, as the only survivor,
1669
01:24:50,669 --> 01:24:53,206
how did you deduce it was me?
1670
01:24:53,213 --> 01:24:56,831
- Went back to theory
seldom used today,
1671
01:24:58,385 --> 01:24:59,546
butler did it.
1672
01:25:01,263 --> 01:25:03,425
- Oh, I hadn't thought of that,
1673
01:25:03,432 --> 01:25:06,595
but how do you account for
my dead body in the kitchen?
1674
01:25:06,602 --> 01:25:09,390
- Oh, body made of plastic.
1675
01:25:09,396 --> 01:25:11,558
Same as plastic cook.
1676
01:25:11,565 --> 01:25:15,024
While we examined
plastic butler,
1677
01:25:15,027 --> 01:25:17,064
you murder Lionel Twain.
1678
01:25:18,113 --> 01:25:20,821
- You're a clever little
laundry man, Mr. Wang.
1679
01:25:20,824 --> 01:25:23,111
- But not quite clever enough.
1680
01:25:24,161 --> 01:25:27,244
I'll take that one million
dollars, Bensonmum.
1681
01:25:28,874 --> 01:25:30,490
Alias Irving Goldman.
1682
01:25:32,544 --> 01:25:33,659
- Irving Goldman?
1683
01:25:34,713 --> 01:25:36,249
- Oh yes.
1684
01:25:36,256 --> 01:25:40,716
Irving Goldman was the attorney
of the late Lionel Twain,
1685
01:25:40,719 --> 01:25:42,926
and Lionel Twain
died five years ago,
1686
01:25:42,929 --> 01:25:44,715
his body was recently discovered
1687
01:25:44,723 --> 01:25:46,839
in Goldman's filing cabinet.
1688
01:25:46,850 --> 01:25:50,059
Am I correct, Mr. Goldman?
1689
01:25:50,062 --> 01:25:53,350
- Yeah, correct, Ms. Marbles,
1690
01:25:53,357 --> 01:25:56,850
but how did you
escape the poison gas?
1691
01:25:56,860 --> 01:25:58,771
- Quite simple,
I covered my mouth,
1692
01:25:58,779 --> 01:26:01,271
and let Ms. Withers here
breathe in all the gas.
1693
01:26:02,866 --> 01:26:04,231
- Sicky poo.
1694
01:26:04,242 --> 01:26:06,108
- Yes, dear, I know.
1695
01:26:06,119 --> 01:26:08,235
The million dollars please.
1696
01:26:08,246 --> 01:26:09,657
- I wouldn't, if I
were you, Goldman.
1697
01:26:09,665 --> 01:26:11,781
Or is it Goldman?
1698
01:26:11,792 --> 01:26:15,160
Actually, it's
Mr. Marvin Metzler.
1699
01:26:16,672 --> 01:26:17,672
- Marvin Metzler.
1700
01:26:19,257 --> 01:26:21,544
- Very good, Mr. Charleston,
1701
01:26:22,803 --> 01:26:25,044
but how did you know?
1702
01:26:25,055 --> 01:26:27,717
- The bill in the
dead butler's hand.
1703
01:26:27,724 --> 01:26:30,341
Stating that the entire
weekend had been catered,
1704
01:26:30,352 --> 01:26:31,683
only an accountant
would have held
1705
01:26:31,687 --> 01:26:32,518
on to a thing like that.
1706
01:26:32,521 --> 01:26:34,432
- Dicky, get the
money and let's go.
1707
01:26:34,439 --> 01:26:35,270
- In a moment, darling.
1708
01:26:35,273 --> 01:26:37,856
Goldman was killed last
month while skiing.
1709
01:26:37,859 --> 01:26:40,977
He jumped 200 feet into
a low flying plane.
1710
01:26:40,987 --> 01:26:42,898
- Dicky, I can't
wait much longer.
1711
01:26:42,906 --> 01:26:46,615
- You've not lost your
touch, Mr. Charleston,
1712
01:26:46,618 --> 01:26:49,861
but how did you elude
the deadly scorpion.
1713
01:26:49,871 --> 01:26:52,203
- Oh we didn't, he stung Dora.
1714
01:26:52,207 --> 01:26:54,039
We have 15 minutes
to get to the doctor.
1715
01:26:54,042 --> 01:26:55,373
- Could you explain
later, Dicky?
1716
01:26:55,377 --> 01:26:56,208
Let's go now.
- We'll make it, darling.
1717
01:26:56,211 --> 01:26:57,121
Never fear.
1718
01:26:57,129 --> 01:26:58,619
The prize money, Mr. Metzler.
1719
01:26:58,630 --> 01:26:59,995
- Belongs to me, monsieur.
1720
01:27:00,966 --> 01:27:04,504
Marcel, being one of the
world's strongest men
1721
01:27:04,511 --> 01:27:06,593
stopped your ceiling
from crushing us,
1722
01:27:06,596 --> 01:27:08,303
at four feet five inches.
1723
01:27:09,307 --> 01:27:13,266
It may be months before we are
able to straighten up again,
1724
01:27:13,270 --> 01:27:14,886
but the million dollars
1725
01:27:14,896 --> 01:27:18,639
will buy a lot of
back braces, eh?
1726
01:27:19,651 --> 01:27:23,815
Miss Irene Twain,
daughter of Lionel.
1727
01:27:24,990 --> 01:27:25,990
- What?
1728
01:27:27,576 --> 01:27:29,863
- I prefer to be called Rita.
1729
01:27:33,290 --> 01:27:34,496
But how did you know?
1730
01:27:34,499 --> 01:27:37,366
- Never underestimate
a Frenchman's nostrils,
1731
01:27:37,377 --> 01:27:39,994
Ms. Twain, at dinner tonight,
1732
01:27:41,006 --> 01:27:43,873
I smelled your
Chanel Number Five.
1733
01:27:43,884 --> 01:27:46,376
It was you who did
away with all of them,
1734
01:27:46,386 --> 01:27:49,094
Metzler, Goldman,
and your father.
1735
01:27:50,223 --> 01:27:52,089
In fact, if you had your way,
1736
01:27:52,100 --> 01:27:54,387
you would do away with all men,
1737
01:27:54,394 --> 01:27:56,055
would you not, Ms. Twain,
1738
01:27:56,062 --> 01:27:59,646
men who have made you
ashamed and made you suffer
1739
01:27:59,649 --> 01:28:03,563
because you were born with
brains, talent, money,
1740
01:28:03,570 --> 01:28:07,234
everything but that which
you most desired, beauty.
1741
01:28:09,075 --> 01:28:11,407
It is a statement of fact, Ms.
Twain.
1742
01:28:11,411 --> 01:28:13,152
That as a man you
are barely passable,
1743
01:28:13,163 --> 01:28:17,748
but as a woman, you are a dog.
1744
01:28:17,751 --> 01:28:20,539
- That's your opinion, big boy.
1745
01:28:23,048 --> 01:28:25,005
- And now my money, please.
1746
01:28:25,008 --> 01:28:28,251
With luck, I can still
make dinner at Maxine's.
1747
01:28:29,679 --> 01:28:32,216
- If I were you, I'd just
order a tuna fish sandwich,
1748
01:28:32,224 --> 01:28:34,511
because that dough
belongs to me.
1749
01:28:34,518 --> 01:28:36,976
That's right, I'm
alive and kicking.
1750
01:28:36,978 --> 01:28:38,719
Ms. Skeffington here
dropped your bomb
1751
01:28:38,730 --> 01:28:41,643
down the john and blew
up just as she flushed.
1752
01:28:41,650 --> 01:28:43,766
The seat missed her
head by an inch.
1753
01:28:45,821 --> 01:28:46,821
K- I'm a“ right, 33..
1754
01:28:52,619 --> 01:28:55,077
- That's right, folks,
he outsmarted us all.
1755
01:28:56,873 --> 01:28:58,204
Sitting behind that desk
1756
01:28:58,208 --> 01:28:59,824
is the real Sam Diamond.
1757
01:29:01,169 --> 01:29:03,752
My name is Loomis, J.J. Loomis,
1758
01:29:03,755 --> 01:29:06,167
I'm an actor, I do impressions.
1759
01:29:06,174 --> 01:29:08,336
I did the Carson show
six times last year.
1760
01:29:09,803 --> 01:29:11,510
Diamond hired me
for the weekend.
1761
01:29:12,430 --> 01:29:14,671
Ms. Skeffington here is
actually Vilma Norman.
1762
01:29:14,683 --> 01:29:18,176
She's a cocktail waitress at
the Waterbed Motel in Carmel.
1763
01:29:18,186 --> 01:29:19,017
- Hi.
1764
01:29:19,020 --> 01:29:19,885
- Hello.
1765
01:29:19,896 --> 01:29:20,977
- Hi.
1766
01:29:20,981 --> 01:29:22,972
- Diamond hated all of you.
1767
01:29:22,983 --> 01:29:24,144
You were all getting
the big money
1768
01:29:24,150 --> 01:29:27,484
and he had that crummy little
office in San Francisco.
1769
01:29:27,487 --> 01:29:28,898
If he proved that
he was number one,
1770
01:29:28,905 --> 01:29:31,021
he would get all
your rich clients,
1771
01:29:31,032 --> 01:29:33,273
but since I put all
the pieces together,
1772
01:29:35,287 --> 01:29:38,450
I figure that money
belongs to me.
1773
01:29:40,125 --> 01:29:42,162
Isn't that right, Mr. Diamond?
1774
01:29:45,046 --> 01:29:46,046
- Wrong.
1775
01:29:47,966 --> 01:29:49,297
That would have been so obvious,
1776
01:29:49,301 --> 01:29:51,087
a child could have guessed it.
1777
01:29:51,094 --> 01:29:54,007
No, my dear colleagues, what
you all seem to overlook
1778
01:29:54,014 --> 01:29:57,052
is the most simple
and direct solution,
1779
01:29:57,058 --> 01:30:00,892
that I am indeed Lionel Twain.
1780
01:30:04,524 --> 01:30:08,893
You've all been so
clever for so long,
1781
01:30:08,904 --> 01:30:11,316
you've forgotten to be humble.
1782
01:30:11,323 --> 01:30:14,941
You tricked and fooled
your readers for years,
1783
01:30:14,951 --> 01:30:16,908
you've tortured us all
with surprise endings
1784
01:30:16,912 --> 01:30:18,823
that made no sense.
1785
01:30:18,830 --> 01:30:21,788
You've introduced characters
in the last five pages
1786
01:30:21,791 --> 01:30:23,702
that were never in
the book before.
1787
01:30:24,586 --> 01:30:28,079
You withheld clues
and information
1788
01:30:28,089 --> 01:30:31,878
that made it impossible
for us to guess who did it,
1789
01:30:31,885 --> 01:30:34,968
but now, the tables are turned.
1790
01:30:36,640 --> 01:30:39,849
Millions of angry
mystery readers
1791
01:30:39,851 --> 01:30:42,092
are now getting their revenge,
1792
01:30:43,313 --> 01:30:46,851
when the world learns
I've outsmarted you,
1793
01:30:46,858 --> 01:30:51,318
they'll be selling your
$1.95 books for 12 cents.
1794
01:30:51,321 --> 01:30:53,562
It's check out time,
ladies and gentlemen.
1795
01:30:54,532 --> 01:30:56,523
I have your bills ready.
1796
01:30:56,534 --> 01:30:57,534
- Oh.
1797
01:30:58,286 --> 01:31:00,573
- Credit cards will be accepted.
1798
01:31:21,935 --> 01:31:24,347
- Then even the
scorpion was fake?
1799
01:31:24,354 --> 01:31:26,015
- Everything, the
bridge, the maid.
1800
01:31:26,022 --> 01:31:28,935
- But you're sure
about the scorpion.
1801
01:31:28,942 --> 01:31:31,024
- Positive, even the fog.
1802
01:31:31,027 --> 01:31:33,018
He made that with
a dry ice machine.
1803
01:31:33,029 --> 01:31:34,315
See for yourself.
1804
01:31:34,322 --> 01:31:36,484
- Awfully unromantic.
1805
01:31:42,664 --> 01:31:44,905
- Then if he really
was Lionel Twain,
1806
01:31:44,916 --> 01:31:46,998
you must really be Sam Diamond.
1807
01:31:48,545 --> 01:31:50,127
- That's right, baby.
1808
01:31:50,130 --> 01:31:53,088
I was in disguise, in
disguise, in disguise.
1809
01:31:53,091 --> 01:31:56,129
You'll work hard for 50
bucks a day in this racket.
1810
01:31:56,136 --> 01:31:57,342
- I guess that means we won't
1811
01:31:57,345 --> 01:31:59,461
be seeing each other again, Sam.
1812
01:31:59,472 --> 01:32:00,633
- Well, that depends.
1813
01:32:00,640 --> 01:32:02,096
I'll be around if you need me.
1814
01:32:03,893 --> 01:32:05,224
All you gotta do is whistle.
1815
01:32:08,023 --> 01:32:10,310
And you know how to
whistle, don't you, baby?
1816
01:32:10,316 --> 01:32:11,556
- Certainly, what do you mean?
1817
01:32:11,568 --> 01:32:13,855
- All right, never
mind, forget it.
1818
01:32:13,862 --> 01:32:14,862
You ruined it.
1819
01:32:19,242 --> 01:32:20,607
- I don't understand, Pop.
1820
01:32:20,618 --> 01:32:22,325
Was there a murder
or wasn't there?
1821
01:32:22,328 --> 01:32:23,159
- Yes.
1822
01:32:23,163 --> 01:32:24,995
Killed good weekend.
1823
01:32:24,998 --> 01:32:26,033
Drive please.
128269
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