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1
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www.tvsubtitles.net
2
00:00:05,594 --> 00:00:08,894
1983 was my first
Valentine's Day as a teenager.
3
00:00:09,393 --> 00:00:12,170
I never really cared about
Valentine's Day before,
4
00:00:12,256 --> 00:00:13,857
but now I couldn't ignore it.
5
00:00:15,113 --> 00:00:18,501
Valentine's Day makes most people
think of flowers and candy,
6
00:00:18,621 --> 00:00:21,676
but it reminded me of
the gangland massacre in Chicago.
7
00:00:22,285 --> 00:00:23,870
Happy Valentine's Day.
8
00:00:31,916 --> 00:00:33,912
Yesterday,
those roses cost $10.
9
00:00:34,189 --> 00:00:36,059
Today, they're $110.
10
00:00:36,656 --> 00:00:37,691
Even when you're broke,
11
00:00:37,692 --> 00:00:40,747
you have to find a way
to tell your woman you love her.
12
00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:42,602
Hey!
13
00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:45,903
You picked the wrong wall today.
14
00:00:45,923 --> 00:00:48,837
Even if it means
getting the crap beat out of you.
15
00:00:49,410 --> 00:00:51,632
On Valentine's Day,
love was in the air.
16
00:00:52,563 --> 00:00:55,618
You should have seen
what they did after they shot him.
17
00:00:57,423 --> 00:00:58,423
Hey.
18
00:00:58,924 --> 00:01:00,368
Hi. Happy Valentine's Day.
19
00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:03,547
Even at school,
Valentine's Day was a big deal,
20
00:01:03,737 --> 00:01:07,125
and it seemed like everybody
was getting something except me.
21
00:01:07,284 --> 00:01:08,588
Still a few days to go.
22
00:01:08,635 --> 00:01:09,996
We could still get a card.
23
00:01:09,997 --> 00:01:11,671
That look means,
"If we weren't friends,
24
00:01:11,718 --> 00:01:13,272
I'd smack the hope out of you."
25
00:01:14,002 --> 00:01:16,502
Hey, I got one.
I got a Valentine's Day card.
26
00:01:16,557 --> 00:01:17,557
Cool.
27
00:01:18,212 --> 00:01:20,559
Hey, if I got a card,
I know you will.
28
00:01:21,017 --> 00:01:22,017
What's it say?
29
00:01:25,518 --> 00:01:27,295
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
30
00:01:27,526 --> 00:01:29,874
you stink like a monkey
and look like one, too.
31
00:01:29,875 --> 00:01:31,097
Happy Valentine's Day.
32
00:01:32,039 --> 00:01:33,594
So much for love in the air.
33
00:01:34,233 --> 00:01:37,166
1x14 Everybody Hates Valentine's Day
34
00:01:37,417 --> 00:01:40,639
Transcript: Raceman
Synchro: Sixe
35
00:02:08,248 --> 00:02:10,914
I didn't have any luck
with girls when I was 13.
36
00:02:11,094 --> 00:02:13,205
Mostly,
I just had a bunch of crushes.
37
00:02:13,582 --> 00:02:14,638
They call it a crush,
38
00:02:14,704 --> 00:02:16,954
because chances are
if you open your mouth,
39
00:02:16,955 --> 00:02:18,343
you're gonna get crushed.
40
00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:21,465
They could have called it,
"She don't like you, stupid,"
41
00:02:21,466 --> 00:02:23,021
but "crush" is just quicker.
42
00:02:25,214 --> 00:02:26,325
That's Tangee Brown.
43
00:02:28,374 --> 00:02:29,374
Hi.
44
00:02:29,623 --> 00:02:31,456
All she ever said to me was "hi."
45
00:02:31,783 --> 00:02:32,894
That's all I needed.
46
00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:35,185
After that,
she became my Bus Crush.
47
00:02:36,738 --> 00:02:39,904
I call it a Bus Crush
because this one happened on a bus.
48
00:02:40,786 --> 00:02:42,971
One time I had an Elevator Crush.
49
00:02:44,939 --> 00:02:47,772
I almost lost my head
trying to follow her around.
50
00:02:47,848 --> 00:02:49,292
There was my Window Crush.
51
00:02:51,856 --> 00:02:54,967
The laws about that
were a lot more relaxed at the time.
52
00:02:54,970 --> 00:02:57,525
There was only one problem
with my Bus Crush--
53
00:02:57,821 --> 00:02:58,865
she had a boyfriend.
54
00:02:58,889 --> 00:03:00,016
Why I got to be stupid?
55
00:03:00,039 --> 00:03:01,366
You're the one who lost your hat.
56
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:04,285
I lost it because I was trying to keep
you from getting on the wrong bus.
57
00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:06,189
- So I'm dumb now?
- Yeah, Tangee.
58
00:03:06,190 --> 00:03:07,967
And you're getting on my nerves.
59
00:03:09,542 --> 00:03:11,208
Clyde, you still got my books.
60
00:03:11,414 --> 00:03:12,424
Here.
61
00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:15,095
You need to read them.
Maybe they'll teach you how to act.
62
00:03:15,096 --> 00:03:18,540
This must be how the drummer felt
watching Ike and Tina fight.
63
00:03:19,203 --> 00:03:20,203
Thank you.
64
00:03:20,359 --> 00:03:22,410
- You want to sit down?
- No, that's okay.
65
00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:24,364
Oh, no, it's all right.
I like to stand.
66
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:26,520
Thanks.
67
00:03:26,668 --> 00:03:30,030
At that moment, somebody could have
sold me a lifetime bus pass.
68
00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:37,300
My mother loved Valentine's Day,
and why not?
69
00:03:37,879 --> 00:03:41,188
I learned early on, Valentine's Day
is not a day for couples.
70
00:03:41,189 --> 00:03:42,355
It's a day for women.
71
00:03:42,738 --> 00:03:46,572
If a woman shows up at a man's door
empty-handed, big deal.
72
00:03:47,493 --> 00:03:49,437
But if a man shows up empty-handed,
73
00:03:49,792 --> 00:03:51,647
he may as well not have shown up at all.
74
00:03:51,694 --> 00:03:52,752
Die, you pig!
75
00:03:53,157 --> 00:03:54,695
He won't forget next year.
76
00:03:55,113 --> 00:03:56,052
Hello?
77
00:03:56,087 --> 00:03:57,120
Can I talk to Drew?
78
00:03:57,156 --> 00:03:58,968
No, Drew can't come
to the phone right now.
79
00:03:58,969 --> 00:04:00,078
We're having dinner.
80
00:04:00,079 --> 00:04:00,973
I'm his Valentine.
81
00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:02,782
- His who?
- His Valentine.
82
00:04:02,783 --> 00:04:03,838
His only Valentine.
83
00:04:04,131 --> 00:04:05,131
Okay, bye.
84
00:04:06,759 --> 00:04:09,928
Drew, you need to tell these fast
little girls to stop calling this house
85
00:04:09,975 --> 00:04:11,490
all hours of the day and night.
86
00:04:11,646 --> 00:04:13,596
- I told them already,
- Well, tell them again.
87
00:04:13,597 --> 00:04:17,214
They're all calling here talking about,
"Well, tell him his Valentine called."
88
00:04:17,419 --> 00:04:18,855
I don't have time for that mess.
89
00:04:18,856 --> 00:04:21,391
Relax.
Boy can't help it if he's popular.
90
00:04:21,611 --> 00:04:24,314
Chris, how many Valentine cards
did you get so far?
91
00:04:24,315 --> 00:04:26,581
- None.
- How come girls don't like you?
92
00:04:26,604 --> 00:04:28,368
Because none of your business,
that's why.
93
00:04:28,369 --> 00:04:29,314
Don't get mad at me.
94
00:04:29,315 --> 00:04:30,315
Hey, hey, hey.
95
00:04:32,069 --> 00:04:34,846
Mama, can you help me
make a Valentine's Day card?
96
00:04:34,877 --> 00:04:35,877
A homemade card.
97
00:04:36,172 --> 00:04:38,262
That's my little girl,
saving that money.
98
00:04:38,929 --> 00:04:40,386
Sure, baby.
Who's it for?
99
00:04:40,738 --> 00:04:41,738
My boyfriend.
100
00:04:43,982 --> 00:04:45,138
Your what friend?
101
00:04:45,139 --> 00:04:47,694
Well, the girl can't help it
if she's popular.
102
00:04:51,103 --> 00:04:53,207
- Where'd you get a boyfriend?
- At school.
103
00:04:53,714 --> 00:04:56,858
Hey, Ma, do you have a place where
I can put all my Valentine's Day cards?
104
00:04:56,859 --> 00:04:58,306
How many you giving out, boy?
105
00:04:58,363 --> 00:05:00,066
Well, I'm not really
giving them out.
106
00:05:00,067 --> 00:05:01,892
Girls just keep on giving them to me.
107
00:05:01,916 --> 00:05:03,137
My man.
108
00:05:03,753 --> 00:05:06,185
Are girls supposed to give boys
Valentine's Day cards?
109
00:05:06,186 --> 00:05:07,688
Well, they're giving them to him.
110
00:05:07,689 --> 00:05:09,522
What's that got to do to with me?
111
00:05:10,734 --> 00:05:12,389
How long
have you had a boyfriend?
112
00:05:12,390 --> 00:05:13,390
Just for a week.
113
00:05:14,293 --> 00:05:16,042
- Rochelle?
- Julius.
114
00:05:16,455 --> 00:05:19,038
I wish somebody would give me
a Valentine's Day card that says
115
00:05:19,073 --> 00:05:20,752
something besides "I hate you."
116
00:05:20,925 --> 00:05:23,285
Well, if you want,
you can have one of mine.
117
00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:26,023
And I thought getting
his hand-me-downs was bad.
118
00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:27,059
No, thank you.
119
00:05:28,269 --> 00:05:30,802
Who gave you a card
that said "I hate you"?
120
00:05:31,016 --> 00:05:32,860
Oh, I don't know.
121
00:05:33,370 --> 00:05:34,703
It's just a stupid joke.
122
00:05:35,583 --> 00:05:37,334
Even though I didn't like Caruso,
123
00:05:37,335 --> 00:05:40,374
I didn't think he deserved
to be cursed out by my mother.
124
00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:43,747
Even though my father
wasn't romantic,
125
00:05:43,748 --> 00:05:45,136
he wasn't stupid, either.
126
00:05:45,296 --> 00:05:48,240
He had a shoebox
full of greeting cards in the house.
127
00:05:48,301 --> 00:05:50,967
He could give my mother a card
for any occasion.
128
00:05:51,959 --> 00:05:52,959
Happy Anniversary.
129
00:05:53,958 --> 00:05:55,235
Aw, you shouldn't have.
130
00:05:57,464 --> 00:05:58,551
Happy Flag Day.
131
00:05:59,872 --> 00:06:01,469
Oh, you shouldn't have.
132
00:06:03,229 --> 00:06:04,229
Happy Chanukah.
133
00:06:05,362 --> 00:06:06,752
Oh, you shouldn't have.
134
00:06:08,750 --> 00:06:10,732
He used to keep candy
under the bed, too,
135
00:06:10,733 --> 00:06:12,288
but the mice kept eating it.
136
00:06:19,591 --> 00:06:20,749
Hey, babe.
137
00:06:20,750 --> 00:06:21,750
Hey, baby.
138
00:06:21,954 --> 00:06:22,954
This is for you.
139
00:06:24,902 --> 00:06:27,124
Baby, it's not even
Valentine's Day yet.
140
00:06:27,907 --> 00:06:30,407
I know, but...
every day is special with you.
141
00:06:32,414 --> 00:06:34,136
Oh, Julius,
you didn't have to.
142
00:06:35,183 --> 00:06:36,479
But since you did...
143
00:06:39,676 --> 00:06:41,225
You see all this right here?
144
00:06:41,226 --> 00:06:42,222
You see that?
145
00:06:42,250 --> 00:06:44,302
That's why Tonya don't need
to be running around here
146
00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:45,923
talking about she got a boyfriend.
147
00:06:46,293 --> 00:06:48,047
Julius, she's ten years old.
148
00:06:48,448 --> 00:06:50,700
He's just a boy in her class.
It's not big deal.
149
00:06:50,953 --> 00:06:52,451
Rochelle,
do you watch the news?
150
00:06:52,452 --> 00:06:54,174
Girls are having babies at ten.
151
00:06:54,305 --> 00:06:55,582
And grandbabies at 20.
152
00:06:56,057 --> 00:06:58,557
Drew is the one
you need to be worried about.
153
00:06:58,812 --> 00:06:59,812
What for?
154
00:07:00,114 --> 00:07:01,447
So a few girls like him.
155
00:07:01,515 --> 00:07:02,871
There's nothing wrong with that.
156
00:07:02,872 --> 00:07:03,872
He's 11.
157
00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:06,224
He's only one year older than Tonya.
158
00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:07,957
What is the difference?
159
00:07:08,433 --> 00:07:09,433
She is a girl.
160
00:07:10,714 --> 00:07:13,640
Baby, you cannot protect
Tonya from everything.
161
00:07:14,364 --> 00:07:15,533
You wanna bet?
162
00:07:16,042 --> 00:07:17,042
Watch me.
163
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:18,824
I'll protect her from everything.
164
00:07:18,943 --> 00:07:19,891
Everything.
165
00:07:19,892 --> 00:07:22,503
It was clear that my father
already had a plan.
166
00:07:22,749 --> 00:07:24,123
Daddy, this is Ronald.
167
00:07:24,302 --> 00:07:25,302
My fiancé.
168
00:07:25,350 --> 00:07:26,572
Nice to meet you, sir.
169
00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:34,378
Mama!
Daddy shot my fiancé again.
170
00:07:35,090 --> 00:07:38,367
Hey, say what you want,
but that's effective birth control.
171
00:07:39,543 --> 00:07:42,320
Hey, why do girls like guys
that are mean to them?
172
00:07:42,744 --> 00:07:43,966
Nice guys finish last.
173
00:07:44,449 --> 00:07:46,901
Maybe the mean guys
beat the crap out of the nice guys
174
00:07:46,902 --> 00:07:49,568
so when the girls show up
no one else is around.
175
00:07:49,756 --> 00:07:51,109
Did you say anything to her?
176
00:07:51,110 --> 00:07:53,871
I picked up her books
and I offered her a seat.
177
00:07:54,164 --> 00:07:55,441
Oh, man, this is major.
178
00:07:55,671 --> 00:07:57,044
- What's her name?
- Tangee.
179
00:07:57,056 --> 00:07:58,686
Greg,
this is for you.
180
00:08:01,076 --> 00:08:03,020
Please don't open it until I leave.
181
00:08:03,078 --> 00:08:04,832
- Promise?
- Okay.
182
00:08:07,755 --> 00:08:09,101
Valentine's Day card?
183
00:08:09,331 --> 00:08:10,653
It says "Be mine."
184
00:08:11,288 --> 00:08:12,288
Okay.
185
00:08:13,489 --> 00:08:14,489
Yeah.
186
00:08:15,692 --> 00:08:16,969
Man, "Be my Valentine,"
187
00:08:17,147 --> 00:08:18,147
that's so cool.
188
00:08:19,496 --> 00:08:21,105
Hey, look,
you got one, too.
189
00:08:24,006 --> 00:08:25,006
"Roses are red,
190
00:08:25,261 --> 00:08:26,316
violets are blue...
191
00:08:27,710 --> 00:08:28,932
cupid hates your guts,
192
00:08:29,013 --> 00:08:30,013
and I do, too."
193
00:08:31,467 --> 00:08:33,590
Well,
at this time he wrote a poem.
194
00:08:39,340 --> 00:08:41,827
I never knew when
I'd see Tangee on the bus,
195
00:08:41,828 --> 00:08:44,306
so I was always excited
when I saw her get on.
196
00:08:44,329 --> 00:08:46,068
- Let me go!
- No.
197
00:08:46,103 --> 00:08:47,324
Unfortunately,
198
00:08:47,397 --> 00:08:48,952
she was always excited, too.
199
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:50,522
Not happy excited,
200
00:08:50,807 --> 00:08:52,640
more like "hold me back" excited.
201
00:08:52,737 --> 00:08:55,085
Look what you did to my jacket.
It's all stretched out.
202
00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:57,610
You got on the bus like I told you,
it wouldn't have happened.
203
00:08:57,611 --> 00:09:00,063
You ain't my daddy.
I don't have to do what you say.
204
00:09:00,064 --> 00:09:01,799
Push me again
and see what happens.
205
00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:03,899
Hey.
Leave her alone.
206
00:09:04,082 --> 00:09:05,789
- What?
- You heard him.
207
00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:07,362
What you gonna do now?
208
00:09:07,855 --> 00:09:10,650
Hey, I don't need any help
getting my ass whupped.
209
00:09:10,709 --> 00:09:12,580
That's the one thing I'm good at.
210
00:09:23,092 --> 00:09:24,092
Mind you business.
211
00:09:24,641 --> 00:09:26,029
I couldn't back down now.
212
00:09:26,245 --> 00:09:28,633
I was scared if I moved
I might pee myself.
213
00:09:28,848 --> 00:09:29,848
No.
214
00:09:30,698 --> 00:09:32,309
Get the hell off my bus, boy.
215
00:09:33,551 --> 00:09:35,150
- Okay.
- Not you.
216
00:09:35,385 --> 00:09:37,044
You. Come on,
let's go.
217
00:09:37,138 --> 00:09:38,136
Why I got to get off?
218
00:09:38,183 --> 00:09:39,159
He started it.
219
00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,590
Quit lying.
He ain't start nothing.
220
00:09:41,617 --> 00:09:43,915
- Why don't you quit lying?
- I said get off.
221
00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:45,366
Now move.
222
00:09:52,285 --> 00:09:53,576
You want to sit down?
223
00:09:54,580 --> 00:09:55,580
Sure.
224
00:09:58,691 --> 00:09:59,691
Why'd you do that?
225
00:10:00,395 --> 00:10:02,643
I don't know.
I wasn't thinking, I guess.
226
00:10:02,946 --> 00:10:05,051
My father said
you're not supposed to hit a girl.
227
00:10:05,052 --> 00:10:07,050
- You know your father?
- Yeah.
228
00:10:08,968 --> 00:10:11,505
Nobody's ever looked out
for me like that before.
229
00:10:11,506 --> 00:10:13,462
- What's your name?
- Chris.
230
00:10:20,819 --> 00:10:22,129
I'm Tangee.
231
00:10:22,988 --> 00:10:23,988
Here.
232
00:10:24,322 --> 00:10:25,666
A Valentine's Day card?
233
00:10:26,340 --> 00:10:27,340
Yeah.
234
00:10:27,546 --> 00:10:30,101
I was going to give it to Clyde,
but he makes me sick.
235
00:10:30,801 --> 00:10:31,810
Thanks.
236
00:10:31,846 --> 00:10:33,923
This was great,
my first Valentine's.
237
00:10:34,275 --> 00:10:36,759
So what if it was meant for
a future wife beater?
238
00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:37,760
He ain't beat me.
239
00:10:40,918 --> 00:10:41,908
Hi.
Is Drew home?
240
00:10:43,265 --> 00:10:45,153
Do you realize it's 8:30 at night?
241
00:10:45,318 --> 00:10:46,318
Drew is in bed.
242
00:10:46,617 --> 00:10:47,868
He is 11.
243
00:10:48,519 --> 00:10:51,074
E-L-E-V-E-N. 11.
244
00:10:51,499 --> 00:10:52,744
- I...
- Go home.
245
00:10:52,779 --> 00:10:55,253
If I see you around my child again,
I'm calling the cops.
246
00:10:55,288 --> 00:10:57,034
- You got that?
- Yeah, I-I...
247
00:10:57,081 --> 00:10:59,596
Okay, I know,
I know, girl, I know.
248
00:11:00,502 --> 00:11:01,542
Beat it.
249
00:11:03,668 --> 00:11:05,456
These are my favorites.
250
00:11:08,844 --> 00:11:09,957
All right, bye, Dad.
251
00:11:09,958 --> 00:11:11,013
See you later, son.
252
00:11:11,747 --> 00:11:14,565
Daddy, you haven't walked us
to school in a long time.
253
00:11:14,566 --> 00:11:16,010
I know.
It's been a while.
254
00:11:17,467 --> 00:11:19,411
Aren't you supposed to be sleeping?
255
00:11:19,675 --> 00:11:21,341
Yeah.
I can get my rest later.
256
00:11:22,526 --> 00:11:25,081
Mama said you
don't like walking us to school.
257
00:11:25,230 --> 00:11:26,230
That's not true.
258
00:11:27,032 --> 00:11:28,032
You want a dollar?
259
00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:29,889
All right.
260
00:11:30,736 --> 00:11:31,736
There you go.
261
00:11:33,142 --> 00:11:34,253
Hey, since I'm here,
262
00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:38,093
why don't you show me which one of these kids is your boyfriend.
263
00:11:38,152 --> 00:11:40,923
Oh, um... there he is.
264
00:11:40,982 --> 00:11:42,215
J ames!
265
00:11:43,910 --> 00:11:45,225
So that's him, huh?
266
00:11:45,368 --> 00:11:46,368
Yeah.
267
00:11:47,172 --> 00:11:48,172
All right.
268
00:11:49,701 --> 00:11:50,929
Bye, Daddy.
269
00:11:50,977 --> 00:11:52,143
All right, bye, baby.
270
00:11:57,856 --> 00:11:59,300
Can I talk to you for a minute?
271
00:12:00,364 --> 00:12:02,115
- Who, me?
- Yeah, you.
272
00:12:02,162 --> 00:12:03,294
Get over here.
273
00:12:03,323 --> 00:12:04,398
What's your name?
274
00:12:04,399 --> 00:12:06,547
My name is
"Don't worry about what my name is."
275
00:12:06,582 --> 00:12:09,070
What, you think you're some kind of
ladies' man or something?
276
00:12:09,094 --> 00:12:10,440
I don't know any ladies.
277
00:12:10,475 --> 00:12:12,072
They're not even ladies to you?
278
00:12:12,201 --> 00:12:13,915
No. Uh,
I don't know...
279
00:12:14,264 --> 00:12:16,661
- Who are you?
- Don't worry about who I am.
280
00:12:16,890 --> 00:12:19,039
Worry about who
you're giving them cards to.
281
00:12:19,074 --> 00:12:20,272
I want my mama.
282
00:12:20,403 --> 00:12:21,734
So you a mama's boy?
283
00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:23,120
Yes.
284
00:12:23,123 --> 00:12:24,532
Well,
listen up, mama's boy.
285
00:12:24,533 --> 00:12:26,977
You stay away from my daughter,
you hear me?
286
00:12:29,688 --> 00:12:30,949
Hey, man,
stop that.
287
00:12:32,037 --> 00:12:33,648
Hey, stay away from that boy!
288
00:12:34,209 --> 00:12:35,183
Get out of here!
289
00:12:35,207 --> 00:12:36,710
I was just talking to him.
290
00:12:37,285 --> 00:12:38,682
Hey, you,
I'm talking to you!
291
00:12:39,821 --> 00:12:42,550
While my father was getting rid
of Tonya's valentine,
292
00:12:42,551 --> 00:12:44,939
I wish he'd been around
to get rid of mine.
293
00:12:47,763 --> 00:12:50,027
"Roses are red, violets are blue...
294
00:12:52,716 --> 00:12:55,882
"Please go back to Africa "
and take your mother with you.
295
00:12:56,794 --> 00:12:58,349
Happy Valentine's Day."
296
00:12:59,081 --> 00:13:01,845
Another card like this,
and I might just go to Africa.
297
00:13:04,738 --> 00:13:05,960
What's wrong with you?
298
00:13:06,384 --> 00:13:08,286
I'm trying
not to bump into Joy again.
299
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:09,889
The school's only but so big.
300
00:13:09,890 --> 00:13:11,604
You're bound
to run into her sometimes.
301
00:13:11,627 --> 00:13:12,894
I just don't want to blow it.
302
00:13:12,895 --> 00:13:14,396
I don't know what my next move is.
303
00:13:14,397 --> 00:13:15,702
Well, did you get her a card?
304
00:13:15,703 --> 00:13:18,201
- No.
- Then that's your next move.
305
00:13:18,759 --> 00:13:21,155
You can come with me.
I was going to go get one anyway.
306
00:13:21,156 --> 00:13:22,156
For who?
307
00:13:22,563 --> 00:13:24,970
The girl on the bus.
She gave me one yesterday.
308
00:13:24,994 --> 00:13:26,191
And you didn't tell me?
309
00:13:26,215 --> 00:13:28,235
I know I go to bed early,
but you could still call
310
00:13:28,258 --> 00:13:30,395
and wake me up when
something this important happens.
311
00:13:30,430 --> 00:13:32,497
Yeah, well,
I wanted to tell you in person.
312
00:13:32,532 --> 00:13:34,505
I broke up a fight
between her and her boyfriend.
313
00:13:34,540 --> 00:13:35,605
You broke up a fight?
314
00:13:35,652 --> 00:13:37,167
Yeah,
and she gave me this card.
315
00:13:37,286 --> 00:13:38,541
Dude,
this is huge.
316
00:13:38,885 --> 00:13:40,635
Is it? I-I don't know.
317
00:13:41,636 --> 00:13:42,891
It... it's just a card.
318
00:13:42,892 --> 00:13:45,003
A card is,
"I'm yours for the taking."
319
00:13:45,248 --> 00:13:47,970
How in there do you have to be
before you get it?
320
00:13:48,045 --> 00:13:49,903
Why is it that
when it comes to me,
321
00:13:49,904 --> 00:13:51,204
you know so much about girls,
322
00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:53,649
but you freak out
when one gives you a card?
323
00:13:54,309 --> 00:13:57,135
I guess it's kind of like
not being able to cut your own hair.
324
00:13:58,522 --> 00:14:00,464
Before you ever buy a girl a gift,
325
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:03,853
the first thing you've got to do
is buy her the perfect card.
326
00:14:03,972 --> 00:14:05,138
Nah, that's too much.
327
00:14:05,226 --> 00:14:07,003
You haven't even kissed her yet.
328
00:14:07,021 --> 00:14:08,021
Have you?
329
00:14:09,858 --> 00:14:10,915
how about this one?
330
00:14:12,982 --> 00:14:14,191
"You know the deal.
331
00:14:14,385 --> 00:14:16,107
I want you to be my valentine."
332
00:14:16,487 --> 00:14:19,375
That's cool,
but it's more for a friend than a girl.
333
00:14:20,244 --> 00:14:21,244
Whoa, cool.
334
00:14:22,948 --> 00:14:24,114
"Relatively speaking,
335
00:14:24,497 --> 00:14:26,165
would you be my valentine?"
336
00:14:26,351 --> 00:14:27,351
This is perfect.
337
00:14:27,358 --> 00:14:29,460
For Tangee?
No thanks.
338
00:14:30,162 --> 00:14:31,162
No, for Joy.
339
00:14:31,357 --> 00:14:33,228
Greg never fought being a nerd.
340
00:14:33,469 --> 00:14:36,024
I always wondered
how that worked out for him.
341
00:14:40,271 --> 00:14:41,429
Come on, honey!
342
00:14:44,634 --> 00:14:46,568
Greg,
when did you get this car?
343
00:14:46,596 --> 00:14:48,518
Well,
the Bentley's in the shop.
344
00:14:55,308 --> 00:14:56,641
I kind of like this one.
345
00:14:58,512 --> 00:15:00,674
Dude,
this card is $2.50.
346
00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:03,924
Hey, you've got to pay
to play, right?
347
00:15:09,239 --> 00:15:10,747
Quick, give me my card.
348
00:15:11,689 --> 00:15:12,710
Here.
349
00:15:13,156 --> 00:15:14,612
Here.
This is for you.
350
00:15:14,669 --> 00:15:15,902
Thank you.
351
00:15:15,984 --> 00:15:18,033
No, no, no, no.
Read it when you get home.
352
00:15:18,034 --> 00:15:19,034
Okay.
353
00:15:21,890 --> 00:15:23,001
Man, that was close.
354
00:15:23,444 --> 00:15:24,444
What's this?
355
00:15:25,872 --> 00:15:27,380
Oh, ha, ha,
very funny.
356
00:15:31,152 --> 00:15:32,152
Chris!
357
00:15:33,306 --> 00:15:34,306
How could you?
358
00:15:34,687 --> 00:15:37,361
When I found out how Caruso
had been teasing you,
359
00:15:37,362 --> 00:15:40,528
I thought you'd appreciate
a real valentine from someone.
360
00:15:40,934 --> 00:15:42,360
Obviously,
I was wrong.
361
00:15:42,433 --> 00:15:45,383
Nowadays, you wish all the teacher
gave your kids were cards.
362
00:15:45,384 --> 00:15:46,991
I didn't know it was yours.
363
00:15:49,367 --> 00:15:52,353
While I couldn't have been less popular,
back at home,
364
00:15:52,388 --> 00:15:54,555
Drew couldn't have been
more popular.
365
00:15:58,041 --> 00:15:59,006
Hello?
366
00:15:59,007 --> 00:16:00,307
Hey, is my valentine home yet?
367
00:16:00,308 --> 00:16:02,614
No,
Drew is still outside playing.
368
00:16:02,709 --> 00:16:03,949
Stop calling here!
369
00:16:04,841 --> 00:16:06,203
What's wrong,
what's wrong?
370
00:16:06,227 --> 00:16:08,901
All these girls calling.
It's getting on my nerves.
371
00:16:09,364 --> 00:16:11,171
I already have enough
to deal with.
372
00:16:11,218 --> 00:16:14,104
Can you believe there's some maniac
at the school threatening the kids?
373
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:16,472
I've got to go pick them up
from school today.
374
00:16:16,477 --> 00:16:18,880
Well, at least Drew's there
to protect Tonya.
375
00:16:18,881 --> 00:16:21,780
Now, what are we going to do
about Drew and these girls?
376
00:16:22,735 --> 00:16:23,735
What?
377
00:16:23,738 --> 00:16:25,080
Julius, every five minutes,
378
00:16:25,081 --> 00:16:27,581
some girl is calling
or knocking at the door.
379
00:16:27,592 --> 00:16:30,314
Drew is way too young
to get this much attention.
380
00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:32,843
Rochelle, it's nothing,
okay?
381
00:16:34,049 --> 00:16:35,437
Drew's only 11 years old.
382
00:16:35,911 --> 00:16:37,676
He don't care nothing
about those girls.
383
00:16:37,699 --> 00:16:40,059
Boys are becoming fathers
even at age 12.
384
00:16:40,532 --> 00:16:42,622
And great-grandfathers at 43.
385
00:16:42,967 --> 00:16:44,312
Baby, relax.
386
00:16:44,792 --> 00:16:45,849
Don't worry about it.
387
00:16:46,129 --> 00:16:47,517
You don't worry about it,
388
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:50,238
'cause I ain't about to let nobody call me Grandmama.
389
00:16:50,501 --> 00:16:52,127
With my mother on the job,
390
00:16:52,183 --> 00:16:54,372
I didn't get a girl till I was 33.
391
00:16:55,285 --> 00:16:58,451
Meanwhile, Drew had more girls
than an Usher after-party.
392
00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:02,700
Happy Valentine's Day, Drew.
393
00:17:02,816 --> 00:17:04,105
Oh, thank you, Miss Johnson.
394
00:17:06,473 --> 00:17:09,115
As bad as my Valentine's Day
had been going, I knew
395
00:17:09,150 --> 00:17:12,044
I could count on my bus crush
to make it all right.
396
00:17:12,866 --> 00:17:14,588
Hey, Chris,
I saved you a seat.
397
00:17:18,020 --> 00:17:19,020
Thanks.
398
00:17:22,024 --> 00:17:23,328
Can I ask you something?
399
00:17:23,329 --> 00:17:24,329
What?
400
00:17:24,478 --> 00:17:27,478
How come you go with a guy
that you always fight with?
401
00:17:28,037 --> 00:17:30,241
I'm not going with him anymore.
He's stupid.
402
00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:32,899
That's all I needed to hear.
403
00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:34,626
Hey,
I got you something.
404
00:17:35,156 --> 00:17:36,633
Really?
That's so sweet.
405
00:17:37,852 --> 00:17:38,852
What else?
406
00:17:39,902 --> 00:17:40,902
What else, what?
407
00:17:41,108 --> 00:17:42,254
Where's the gift?
408
00:17:42,708 --> 00:17:44,059
I only got you a card.
409
00:17:44,060 --> 00:17:45,060
That's it?
410
00:17:45,124 --> 00:17:46,415
It's Valentine's Day,
411
00:17:46,416 --> 00:17:48,804
and all you got me was
this cheap-ass card?
412
00:17:50,084 --> 00:17:51,270
I-I-I just met you.
413
00:17:51,616 --> 00:17:53,362
So?
Where's the flowers?
414
00:17:53,425 --> 00:17:54,425
Where's the candy?
415
00:17:54,473 --> 00:17:57,423
I thought I meant something to you.
I thought we had a connection.
416
00:17:57,424 --> 00:18:00,195
You know, I could have stayed
with Clyde's sorry ass
417
00:18:00,230 --> 00:18:02,095
if this is how you
were going to treat me.
418
00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:04,390
Can you please quiet down?
You don't tell me to be quiet.
419
00:18:04,414 --> 00:18:05,518
Why don't you be quiet?
420
00:18:05,541 --> 00:18:07,044
Better yet,
shut up!
421
00:18:07,207 --> 00:18:08,291
Tell me to be quiet.
422
00:18:08,373 --> 00:18:09,594
You ain't my daddy!
423
00:18:10,301 --> 00:18:11,494
Getting cursed out on a bus
424
00:18:11,495 --> 00:18:14,550
is not really how I expected
to end my Valentine's Day,
425
00:18:15,050 --> 00:18:16,494
but it did prove my point.
426
00:18:16,558 --> 00:18:17,655
If you have a crush,
427
00:18:17,656 --> 00:18:18,656
you get crushed.
428
00:18:18,853 --> 00:18:20,434
This is nothing
but a piece of paper!
429
00:18:20,435 --> 00:18:21,435
I don't need this!
430
00:18:21,533 --> 00:18:24,325
Now, where was the bus driver
with a bat when you needed him?
431
00:18:24,360 --> 00:18:27,289
And I'd kiss your little funky cheek,
but I could have stayed with Clyde.
432
00:18:27,290 --> 00:18:29,123
Here, take back your stupid card.
433
00:18:34,252 --> 00:18:37,140
Drew, you got to return these cards
to Miss Johnson.
434
00:18:37,456 --> 00:18:41,496
A 30-year-old married woman
giving cards to my 11-year-old son.
435
00:18:42,595 --> 00:18:43,929
What about the candy?
436
00:18:44,650 --> 00:18:47,377
I think sending the cards back
makes the point.
437
00:18:51,330 --> 00:18:53,380
Giving the card to Tangee
didn't work out,
438
00:18:53,381 --> 00:18:55,331
but I knew my mother would appreciate one.
439
00:18:55,332 --> 00:18:57,115
Thank you, sweetie.
440
00:18:57,226 --> 00:18:59,368
You didn't have
to give me a card.
441
00:18:59,844 --> 00:19:01,813
I already know
that you love me.
442
00:19:05,383 --> 00:19:06,655
Who the hell is Joy?
443
00:19:09,850 --> 00:19:12,405
Joy,
are you dating a black guy?
444
00:19:12,452 --> 00:19:14,328
She did, five years later.
445
00:19:17,818 --> 00:19:20,712
Raceman/Sixe/Birdyben
FOROM.COM
446
00:19:20,762 --> 00:19:25,312
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