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The French people want to
give you a giant statue.
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And they said, eh, we're good.
3
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- [Laughs]
- [Coughs]
4
00:00:21,069 --> 00:00:22,397
I'm not eating Play-Doh.
5
00:00:22,407 --> 00:00:23,935
The British are coming,
6
00:00:23,946 --> 00:00:28,034
and if you're not coming,
then you're a mother[Bleep].
7
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This is the moment where I'm like,
8
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"oh, I really am drunk."
9
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I will go into the insane asylum
10
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and give you a really good report.
11
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You're crazy.
12
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Yes, you're crazy.
13
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[Patriotic music]
14
00:00:43,356 --> 00:00:48,225
?
15
00:00:53,529 --> 00:00:55,324
If you want to learn a
lot in, like, one week,
16
00:00:55,337 --> 00:00:56,565
come to New York, you know?
17
00:00:56,574 --> 00:00:58,568
The concrete jungle
where dreams are made of.
18
00:00:58,583 --> 00:01:00,444
We walk the walk. We talk the talk.
19
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We get it done.
20
00:01:01,829 --> 00:01:04,089
Welcome to the capital of the world.
21
00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:05,202
I love New York.
22
00:01:05,210 --> 00:01:06,837
Born and raised in the Bronx, man.
23
00:01:06,849 --> 00:01:08,378
The best pastrami ever.
24
00:01:08,389 --> 00:01:09,983
That boar's head stuff? Forget about it.
25
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It's garbage.
26
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Give me your cool, your poor,
27
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your sick, your hungry, your tired.
28
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Your cool?
29
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[Laughing] Yeah.
30
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- Cheers.
- New York.
31
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? New York to the cool. ?
32
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? New York ?
33
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All right, I'm gonna give you
an arm, the arm of the torch.
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- Of the torch.
- Yeah.
35
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This is the gist.
36
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Hold on. [Laughs]
37
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This is the gist of the arm, right?
38
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If you care about America, you'll see this
39
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for what it's meant to be.
40
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The smurf dick. [Laughs]
41
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All right.
42
00:01:45,503 --> 00:01:47,031
Hello.
43
00:01:47,042 --> 00:01:50,831
Today we're gonna stalk about
the Statue of Liver... [chuckles]
44
00:01:50,857 --> 00:01:52,317
Liberty.
45
00:01:52,328 --> 00:01:55,520
We have the Statue of Liberty
today because of a man named
46
00:01:55,543 --> 00:01:58,965
Frederic Bartholdi, a sculptor in France.
47
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One day he was sitting down
with his buddy who was like,
48
00:02:01,264 --> 00:02:03,158
hey, it's 1865.
49
00:02:03,172 --> 00:02:06,695
The United States is turning
100 [Bleep] years old.
50
00:02:06,720 --> 00:02:09,611
Someone's gonna give them a
gift for their 100th birthday.
51
00:02:09,631 --> 00:02:11,658
It should be France.
52
00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:15,229
And Bartholdi's like, [Bleep] yeah.
53
00:02:15,254 --> 00:02:17,912
This sounds [Bleep] amazing. Yeah.
54
00:02:17,931 --> 00:02:20,856
And Bartholdi comes up
with this idea of this giant
55
00:02:20,876 --> 00:02:25,395
300-foot statue of a stoic
woman made entirely of copper,
56
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holding a golden torch to
represent liber... [chuckles]
57
00:02:28,941 --> 00:02:30,403
[Bleep].
58
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That's a tough... it's a tough word.
59
00:02:31,885 --> 00:02:33,082
- It is.
- Liberty.
60
00:02:33,091 --> 00:02:34,884
Yeah.
61
00:02:34,897 --> 00:02:37,556
So Bartholdi has a sit-down with Congress.
62
00:02:37,575 --> 00:02:40,965
The French people want to
give you a giant statue.
63
00:02:40,989 --> 00:02:43,514
Like, giant.
64
00:02:43,532 --> 00:02:47,155
And whenever people come into
the port of New York Harbor,
65
00:02:47,180 --> 00:02:48,741
the first thing they're gonna see is,
66
00:02:48,753 --> 00:02:52,841
like, like, a... a 300-foot-high statue.
67
00:02:52,869 --> 00:02:56,824
And they said, eh, we're good.
68
00:02:56,852 --> 00:03:01,272
I mean, that's... it's in-[Bleep]-sane.
69
00:03:01,303 --> 00:03:02,465
Bartholdi can't believe it.
70
00:03:02,474 --> 00:03:05,065
I... I just want to give you guys a gift.
71
00:03:05,083 --> 00:03:07,276
Like, this is... I'll make it.
72
00:03:07,292 --> 00:03:08,854
The French will pay for it.
73
00:03:08,865 --> 00:03:10,560
You don't have to do [Bleep].
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And Congress said, here's the thing,
75
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you're French.
76
00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:19,120
The French are kind of pussies.
77
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And the French are kind of dicks.
78
00:03:21,883 --> 00:03:26,436
And the French are kind of not Americans.
79
00:03:26,468 --> 00:03:28,661
So Bartholdi goes back to France.
80
00:03:28,677 --> 00:03:30,140
He's like, [Bleep] this.
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[Bleep] America.
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Whether they take it
or not is their problem.
83
00:03:33,697 --> 00:03:38,516
My problem is I need to complete
a 300-foot copper statue.
84
00:03:38,550 --> 00:03:41,009
I'm gonna have to use the
bathroom again in a sec.
85
00:03:41,026 --> 00:03:43,218
Doesn't it suck having a dick?
86
00:03:43,234 --> 00:03:45,528
No. No.
87
00:03:45,545 --> 00:03:46,940
It doesn't suck having a dick?
88
00:03:46,950 --> 00:03:50,739
- I love having a dick.
- [Laughs]
89
00:03:50,766 --> 00:03:53,955
So by 1876, the 100-year anniversary
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00:03:53,977 --> 00:03:58,332
of the United States, all he has
done is an arm holding a torch.
91
00:03:58,362 --> 00:04:00,222
But the American people
are like, holy [Bleep].
92
00:04:00,236 --> 00:04:02,363
This is [Bleep] great.
93
00:04:02,378 --> 00:04:05,103
Like, I wonder what this
entire statue is gonna
94
00:04:05,123 --> 00:04:06,452
look like when it's done.
95
00:04:06,462 --> 00:04:09,551
And Congress goes, all right,
96
00:04:09,572 --> 00:04:11,632
we will accept your gift.
97
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Bartholdi is over the moon.
98
00:04:13,187 --> 00:04:15,546
Oh, this is so great. Thank you so much.
99
00:04:15,563 --> 00:04:18,488
We should probably talk about the pedestal.
100
00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,435
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on a second.
101
00:04:20,449 --> 00:04:22,509
What are you talking about, "pedestal"?
102
00:04:22,524 --> 00:04:25,581
I need a pedestal to put my statue on.
103
00:04:25,603 --> 00:04:28,295
And the United States Congress says,
104
00:04:28,314 --> 00:04:30,374
um, [Bleep] no.
105
00:04:30,389 --> 00:04:32,183
I'm not paying for [Bleep].
106
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Bartholdi is furious.
107
00:04:33,835 --> 00:04:36,128
I'm going through all this trouble,
108
00:04:36,144 --> 00:04:39,568
and you won't even give me
a place to put my statue?
109
00:04:39,592 --> 00:04:42,615
And Congress says, that's [Bleep] right.
110
00:04:42,637 --> 00:04:44,033
I love Play-Doh.
111
00:04:44,043 --> 00:04:45,470
The thing is... Here's the thing.
112
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Bartholdi is still building,
and eventually a statue is done.
113
00:04:50,333 --> 00:04:53,025
And it's just sitting here,
but there's nowhere to put it.
114
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[Clatter]
115
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Watch it.
116
00:04:56,827 --> 00:04:59,817
Was that expensive, [Indistinct]?
117
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It's around that time that an
American named Joseph Pulitzer
118
00:05:03,453 --> 00:05:07,640
steps in and says, this is [Bleep] crazy.
119
00:05:07,669 --> 00:05:10,061
We won't accept it?
120
00:05:10,078 --> 00:05:11,342
What is going on?
121
00:05:11,352 --> 00:05:13,378
All we have to give them
is a place to put it.
122
00:05:13,392 --> 00:05:16,150
So Pulitzer mounts a totally new campaign.
123
00:05:16,170 --> 00:05:18,828
Look, [Bleep] Congress.
Forget the president.
124
00:05:18,847 --> 00:05:20,475
I think we should build this pedestal.
125
00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:22,846
If you agree, I want
you to give some money.
126
00:05:22,863 --> 00:05:24,359
Doesn't have to be a lot.
127
00:05:24,370 --> 00:05:27,361
Even if you give a penny, I'll
print your name in my newspaper.
128
00:05:27,382 --> 00:05:30,306
And the American people
step up all over the country
129
00:05:30,327 --> 00:05:32,652
sending 5c, 10c, 50c.
130
00:05:32,668 --> 00:05:37,221
120,000 people donate,
and Pulitzer's going,
131
00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:39,579
yeah. Yeah.
132
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My [Bleep] newspaper.
133
00:05:41,302 --> 00:05:42,897
Yeah.
134
00:05:42,909 --> 00:05:46,208
And eventually they
have this pedestal built.
135
00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:48,220
You know what I used to do as a kid?
136
00:05:48,627 --> 00:05:50,227
I loved eating Pay-Doh.
137
00:05:50,305 --> 00:05:51,536
- Did you?
- Oh yeah.
138
00:05:55,984 --> 00:05:56,864
[Bleep], that's terrible.
139
00:06:00,515 --> 00:06:02,043
- I'm not eating Play-Doh.
- [Laughs]
140
00:06:02,054 --> 00:06:04,946
Are you [Bleep] kidding me?
141
00:06:04,967 --> 00:06:07,891
Anyways, the Statue of Liberty is unveiled
142
00:06:07,911 --> 00:06:11,799
to the American people with
Bartholdi on the torch balcony.
143
00:06:11,826 --> 00:06:12,921
Like, look at this [Bleep].
144
00:06:12,930 --> 00:06:16,121
Look at this [Bleep]...
145
00:06:16,143 --> 00:06:18,370
[Gags]
146
00:06:18,386 --> 00:06:19,482
Oh, my God.
147
00:06:19,491 --> 00:06:22,216
- [Laughs]
- [Coughs]
148
00:06:22,235 --> 00:06:23,596
Come on. That's the [Bleep] arm.
149
00:06:23,606 --> 00:06:25,035
You can't get it out of your teeth.
150
00:06:25,046 --> 00:06:26,806
[Laughs]
151
00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:27,916
[Spits]
152
00:06:27,924 --> 00:06:30,824
Stay tuned for more Drunk History.
153
00:06:32,541 --> 00:06:33,671
Let's go.
154
00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:35,275
Let's go get these ass[Bleep].
155
00:06:35,286 --> 00:06:38,642
Let's make it happen.
156
00:06:38,666 --> 00:06:41,357
[Chuckles] Damn it.
157
00:06:41,376 --> 00:06:43,376
I was doing such a good job.
158
00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:49,641
- Are you a fan of Paul Revere?
- Oh, yeah.
159
00:06:49,658 --> 00:06:50,987
Oh, he was the best.
160
00:06:50,997 --> 00:06:53,157
You know that there was
a 16-year-old girl who did
161
00:06:53,172 --> 00:06:57,791
exactly what Paul Revere
did except he did 20 miles
162
00:06:57,823 --> 00:07:00,282
of letting everyone know
the redcoats were coming,
163
00:07:00,300 --> 00:07:02,160
and she did 40 miles.
164
00:07:02,173 --> 00:07:04,467
- Really?
- Yeah.
165
00:07:04,484 --> 00:07:06,909
Oh, see?
166
00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:11,746
I love history. I love it.
167
00:07:11,780 --> 00:07:14,670
- Hi, Suzi.
- Hi, Derek.
168
00:07:14,690 --> 00:07:16,450
All right, let's do it.
169
00:07:16,463 --> 00:07:18,026
Oh. Watch your head.
170
00:07:18,037 --> 00:07:19,603
- We're good.
- Hello.
171
00:07:19,660 --> 00:07:23,948
Today we're gonna talk about
Sybil Luning... [chuckles]
172
00:07:23,978 --> 00:07:26,901
Today we're gonna talk
about Sybil Ludington
173
00:07:26,922 --> 00:07:30,080
who did the midnight ride
174
00:07:30,102 --> 00:07:32,627
that you haven't heard about,
175
00:07:32,645 --> 00:07:35,880
but you will, right?
176
00:07:37,229 --> 00:07:39,988
So it's early on in the revolution,
177
00:07:40,007 --> 00:07:43,430
and the British are tearing
through the colonies.
178
00:07:43,454 --> 00:07:44,849
Blap, blap.
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00:07:44,860 --> 00:07:46,887
Kggh!
180
00:07:46,902 --> 00:07:50,159
Sybil Ludington just had her 16th birthday.
181
00:07:50,181 --> 00:07:54,301
Her dad, Henry Ludington, is
the head of the local militia,
182
00:07:54,330 --> 00:07:56,623
fending off the British.
183
00:07:56,640 --> 00:08:01,227
So on this particular night,
she's tucking in her brothers
184
00:08:01,259 --> 00:08:02,986
and sisters, and all of a sudden,
185
00:08:02,998 --> 00:08:04,792
ka-ka, ka-ka.
186
00:08:04,805 --> 00:08:06,666
There's a knock on the door.
187
00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:09,803
- This man is at the door...
- Oh, my God.
188
00:08:09,825 --> 00:08:11,154
He's so out of breath.
189
00:08:11,164 --> 00:08:15,667
The British are burning
Danbury, Connecticut.
190
00:08:17,488 --> 00:08:20,513
Okay. Okay, so Henry Ludington is like,
191
00:08:20,535 --> 00:08:23,957
I need to go knock on every door,
192
00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:28,569
get our militia, and save our country.
193
00:08:28,601 --> 00:08:30,528
Well, here's the thing though.
194
00:08:30,542 --> 00:08:33,864
I have to stay here to,
like, rally the troops,
195
00:08:33,887 --> 00:08:35,582
and make the plan.
196
00:08:35,594 --> 00:08:38,185
It's not like you can send an e-vite out.
197
00:08:38,204 --> 00:08:41,727
So who's gonna do it?
198
00:08:41,752 --> 00:08:46,537
I'll do it, comes a peep from the night.
199
00:08:46,570 --> 00:08:48,963
Hey.
200
00:08:48,980 --> 00:08:50,775
Blah blah.
201
00:08:50,788 --> 00:08:52,316
I got it.
202
00:08:52,327 --> 00:08:55,882
Sybil comes peep-peep-peeping
down the night,
203
00:08:55,907 --> 00:08:58,799
and her dad's like, she's 16 years old.
204
00:08:58,820 --> 00:09:00,314
She's a girl.
205
00:09:00,325 --> 00:09:04,048
It's a [Bleep] hard-ass night outside.
206
00:09:04,074 --> 00:09:07,663
It's 40 miles.
207
00:09:07,688 --> 00:09:10,346
Well, [Bleep]. We don't
have a better option.
208
00:09:10,365 --> 00:09:14,287
So yeah, we're gonna let her do it.
209
00:09:14,314 --> 00:09:16,041
She sets out into the night.
210
00:09:16,054 --> 00:09:18,513
So guess what happens.
211
00:09:18,531 --> 00:09:20,126
It starts raining.
212
00:09:20,137 --> 00:09:23,161
Well, snap. It's raining.
213
00:09:23,183 --> 00:09:26,041
It's, like, wind-y trails and boulders.
214
00:09:26,061 --> 00:09:30,713
She grabs a stick, and
she's... cha-cha... whacking it
215
00:09:30,745 --> 00:09:33,370
on all the doors she passes by.
216
00:09:33,389 --> 00:09:34,685
Ka-ka-ka.
217
00:09:34,695 --> 00:09:37,719
She's like, the British are coming!
218
00:09:37,740 --> 00:09:39,933
If you... the British are coming!
219
00:09:39,949 --> 00:09:41,776
You have to follow me.
220
00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:43,649
Come back to the Ludington's.
221
00:09:43,663 --> 00:09:48,018
And if you're not coming,
then you're a mother[Bleep].
222
00:09:48,048 --> 00:09:52,268
Go! Go! Go!
223
00:09:52,298 --> 00:09:54,093
This is the moment where I'm like,
224
00:09:54,106 --> 00:09:56,797
"oh, I really am drunk." [Giggles]
225
00:09:56,816 --> 00:09:58,909
So she rounds a corner
226
00:09:58,924 --> 00:10:03,578
and suddenly this ass[Bleep]
jumps out of the bushes.
227
00:10:03,610 --> 00:10:05,835
Stop your horse.
228
00:10:05,851 --> 00:10:08,011
You know, give me your purse or whatever.
229
00:10:08,027 --> 00:10:12,481
She's like, all I have is this stick, so...
230
00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:16,333
Aah, and just flap, flap,
flap, flap, flap, flap.
231
00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:18,121
Flaps him in the neck.
232
00:10:18,133 --> 00:10:19,328
[Laughs]
233
00:10:19,337 --> 00:10:20,965
You know? Do you know what I'm saying?
234
00:10:20,977 --> 00:10:22,274
Yeah, classic flap in the neck.
235
00:10:22,284 --> 00:10:23,280
Yeah.
236
00:10:23,288 --> 00:10:24,748
As it came out, it sounded weird,
237
00:10:24,759 --> 00:10:26,654
but you know what I mean.
238
00:10:26,667 --> 00:10:30,987
She just [Bleep] him up,
keeps going, don't have time,
239
00:10:31,018 --> 00:10:32,845
have to round up militiamen.
240
00:10:32,858 --> 00:10:35,383
She gets to every house on the route
241
00:10:35,401 --> 00:10:39,191
spread out over 40 miles.
242
00:10:39,217 --> 00:10:43,105
400 people follow her back
243
00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:45,525
to Henry Ludington's home,
244
00:10:45,542 --> 00:10:47,869
and he is like, oh, my goodness.
245
00:10:47,885 --> 00:10:50,209
You did it. Let's go.
246
00:10:50,226 --> 00:10:51,656
Let's go get these ass[Bleep].
247
00:10:51,667 --> 00:10:54,267
Let's make it happen.
248
00:10:56,484 --> 00:10:59,476
[Chuckles] Damn it.
249
00:10:59,497 --> 00:11:01,889
I was doing such a good job.
250
00:11:01,906 --> 00:11:05,130
Okay, so here comes
Henry Ludington's militia.
251
00:11:05,153 --> 00:11:06,780
And they beat back the British,
252
00:11:06,792 --> 00:11:08,720
and they were like, this is the deal.
253
00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:10,195
And there you go.
254
00:11:10,206 --> 00:11:11,502
And there you stay.
255
00:11:11,512 --> 00:11:13,206
And there you went.
256
00:11:13,218 --> 00:11:16,077
And bye-bye-bye, Charlie.
257
00:11:16,097 --> 00:11:18,654
So a couple weeks go by.
258
00:11:18,672 --> 00:11:21,730
Holy [Bleep]. Whew.
259
00:11:21,752 --> 00:11:23,977
Life is back to normal.
260
00:11:23,993 --> 00:11:26,287
Ba-ba-ba-ba.
261
00:11:26,303 --> 00:11:28,030
There's a knock on the door.
262
00:11:28,043 --> 00:11:32,979
And standing at the door
is George Washington.
263
00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:39,690
And he is like, I'm here
to give a congratulations
264
00:11:39,722 --> 00:11:44,841
to the best effort I've seen ever.
265
00:11:44,877 --> 00:11:48,300
Henry Ludington is like,
you're welcome, sir.
266
00:11:48,324 --> 00:11:51,315
And George Washington's like, uh-uh-uh-uh.
267
00:11:51,336 --> 00:11:53,794
Stand aside.
268
00:11:53,812 --> 00:11:58,533
I'm here to see Sybil Ludington,
269
00:11:58,565 --> 00:12:01,721
who did that amazing ride.
270
00:12:01,744 --> 00:12:04,834
Sybil, from the woodwork, comes out,
271
00:12:04,855 --> 00:12:07,880
oh, yes, sir.
272
00:12:07,902 --> 00:12:09,729
Thank you, sir.
273
00:12:09,742 --> 00:12:13,963
I don't know why in that
part she had a British accent,
274
00:12:13,993 --> 00:12:18,114
but he was like, you are the best.
275
00:12:18,142 --> 00:12:19,604
You did it.
276
00:12:19,615 --> 00:12:22,273
I can't ask for a better
277
00:12:22,292 --> 00:12:25,748
spirit of force from anyone,
278
00:12:25,772 --> 00:12:29,227
and huzzah.
279
00:12:29,252 --> 00:12:31,445
And that's... yeah.
280
00:12:31,460 --> 00:12:34,318
Huzzah.
281
00:12:34,339 --> 00:12:36,932
20 miles is what Paul Revere rode,
282
00:12:36,950 --> 00:12:40,506
and then double it, and that's
what Sybil Ludington did,
283
00:12:40,531 --> 00:12:42,391
which is 40 miles.
284
00:12:42,405 --> 00:12:44,465
That's the whole thing. Period.
285
00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:46,905
End of history, and that's the deal.
286
00:12:46,922 --> 00:12:52,007
And that's the whole...
287
00:12:52,042 --> 00:12:54,943
? Naa-savenya ?
288
00:12:54,999 --> 00:12:57,159
The nurses would just beat
the [Bleep] out of people.
289
00:12:57,174 --> 00:12:59,101
[Blows raspberries]
290
00:12:59,115 --> 00:13:00,278
Hitting them like crazy.
291
00:13:00,287 --> 00:13:02,546
And Nellie Bly was like, aw, [Bleep].
292
00:13:02,563 --> 00:13:04,997
That ain't cool. I'm gonna write that down.
293
00:13:10,473 --> 00:13:13,065
The entrepreneurs who shaped this country
294
00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:16,541
are kind of brawlers, and
that's the beauty of New York.
295
00:13:16,565 --> 00:13:18,293
It's such a brawling town.
296
00:13:18,306 --> 00:13:21,031
Usually in a fight, after it's done,
297
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:23,808
that mess, that cacophony of fists,
298
00:13:23,828 --> 00:13:26,187
you're sort of part of a group.
299
00:13:26,204 --> 00:13:30,159
And that group is who built America.
300
00:13:30,186 --> 00:13:33,020
Come do a shot to get, like, [Bleep].
301
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,714
Good call. [Laughs]
302
00:13:40,728 --> 00:13:43,053
Hello, I'm gonna tell you about Nellie Bly,
303
00:13:43,070 --> 00:13:46,760
a very good journalist from the 1880s
304
00:13:46,785 --> 00:13:50,107
who did an expose
305
00:13:50,131 --> 00:13:52,499
on the world of mental illness.
306
00:13:54,548 --> 00:13:57,439
Nellie Bly was a very strong-minded woman.
307
00:13:57,460 --> 00:14:02,080
She gets a load of a column
from a local pittsburg paper,
308
00:14:02,112 --> 00:14:04,106
and it's super sexist.
309
00:14:04,120 --> 00:14:08,506
The article was like, chicks
got to stay in the kitchen.
310
00:14:08,537 --> 00:14:13,090
Girls got to... why even
bother being educated
311
00:14:13,122 --> 00:14:15,814
when you just got to get
married and have babies?
312
00:14:15,833 --> 00:14:18,492
And she was like, [Bleep] this guy.
313
00:14:18,511 --> 00:14:21,202
Girls are better than being in the kitchen,
314
00:14:21,221 --> 00:14:23,282
being wives, and sewing [Bleep].
315
00:14:23,297 --> 00:14:26,787
I'm super smart, and I'm
gonna show you I'm super smart
316
00:14:26,811 --> 00:14:29,202
just to prove that, like,
317
00:14:29,219 --> 00:14:31,013
women are awesome.
318
00:14:31,026 --> 00:14:34,051
So Nellie... [laughs]
319
00:14:34,073 --> 00:14:37,694
So Nellie Bly went to New York City,
320
00:14:37,719 --> 00:14:41,508
and she knocked on every
newspaper door in the city,
321
00:14:41,535 --> 00:14:46,454
and who answered the door
but Joseph Pulitzer himself.
322
00:14:46,488 --> 00:14:50,543
And he's like, listen, I
don't take you seriously.
323
00:14:50,571 --> 00:14:52,364
But I have an assignment.
324
00:14:52,377 --> 00:14:55,535
I want you to pretend to
be crazy and get committed
325
00:14:55,558 --> 00:14:58,382
to the insane asylum in New York City,
326
00:14:58,402 --> 00:15:01,136
Blackwell's Island.
327
00:15:03,515 --> 00:15:07,005
Nellie Bly said, okay, I'll do it.
328
00:15:07,029 --> 00:15:09,222
And he was like, what?
329
00:15:09,238 --> 00:15:12,727
And she was like, I will
go into the insane asylum
330
00:15:12,752 --> 00:15:14,480
and give you a really good report.
331
00:15:14,492 --> 00:15:16,187
[Dog barks] Right?
332
00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:18,193
Right-right?
333
00:15:18,207 --> 00:15:20,300
[Bleep] that dog.
334
00:15:20,315 --> 00:15:22,315
[Laughs] [Laughs]
335
00:15:22,403 --> 00:15:25,162
Oh, God, some people
have a lot of [Bleep] labs
336
00:15:25,182 --> 00:15:26,676
and they're great.
337
00:15:26,687 --> 00:15:29,744
This thing's a piece of [Bleep].
338
00:15:29,765 --> 00:15:34,319
All right, so Nellie Bly, she
never saw a crazy person before,
339
00:15:34,351 --> 00:15:38,804
so she went in front of a
mirror and made funny faces,
340
00:15:38,835 --> 00:15:41,061
like, [Grunts].
341
00:15:41,077 --> 00:15:43,902
See this face? The face?
342
00:15:43,922 --> 00:15:45,117
[Blows raspberries]
343
00:15:45,126 --> 00:15:47,951
She had no idea what crazy people say.
344
00:15:47,971 --> 00:15:51,559
She was like, okay, this
is how I'm gonna be crazy.
345
00:15:51,584 --> 00:15:54,243
Nah!
346
00:15:54,262 --> 00:15:57,087
She goes to this bo... this boarding house.
347
00:15:57,107 --> 00:15:59,167
Listen, everybo... every... listen,
348
00:15:59,182 --> 00:16:01,774
everybo... every lady at
this boarding house with me.
349
00:16:01,793 --> 00:16:03,954
I am crazy, okay?
350
00:16:03,969 --> 00:16:07,125
[Dog barks]
351
00:16:07,147 --> 00:16:09,206
- What?
- [Barks]
352
00:16:09,221 --> 00:16:12,145
What? Oh, you're crazy.
353
00:16:12,166 --> 00:16:16,787
- [Barks]
- Nellie, you're crazy.
354
00:16:16,819 --> 00:16:19,244
You're crazy.
355
00:16:19,262 --> 00:16:21,422
Yes, you're crazy.
356
00:16:21,437 --> 00:16:24,793
The head mistress is like,
send her to the insane asylum.
357
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,578
And Nellie Bly was like, yes.
358
00:16:26,591 --> 00:16:27,986
This is working.
359
00:16:27,996 --> 00:16:31,453
This is super working
for me. I'm super happy.
360
00:16:31,477 --> 00:16:33,877
And she finds herself
on Blackwell's Island.
361
00:16:42,821 --> 00:16:46,810
Um... [blows raspberries]
362
00:16:46,838 --> 00:16:50,128
I'm drunk as [Bleep].
363
00:16:50,151 --> 00:16:51,513
Whoo!
364
00:16:51,523 --> 00:16:55,377
So she was examined by a
doctor. Like, how tall is she?
365
00:16:55,404 --> 00:16:58,428
And the nurse would be like,
come and look at how tall
366
00:16:58,450 --> 00:17:00,842
this Nellie is.
367
00:17:00,859 --> 00:17:02,787
And doctor would say, like,
368
00:17:02,801 --> 00:17:06,955
what are you doing after
we measure Nellie Bly?
369
00:17:06,984 --> 00:17:11,072
After the nurse and doctor
flirted for, like, a half-hour,
370
00:17:11,100 --> 00:17:14,689
the doctor's like, oh, my God.
371
00:17:14,715 --> 00:17:18,570
This Nellie Bly, she
is a crazy, crazy person
372
00:17:18,597 --> 00:17:20,823
that needs to be here forever.
373
00:17:20,839 --> 00:17:24,762
And Nellie Bly was like, yes!
374
00:17:24,789 --> 00:17:28,378
I'm so happy. I'm such a good journalist.
375
00:17:28,403 --> 00:17:30,496
She started to see how
[Bleep] the conditions were.
376
00:17:30,511 --> 00:17:33,601
The nurses would just beat
the [Bleep] out of people.
377
00:17:33,623 --> 00:17:35,318
Knock them in their ears.
378
00:17:35,330 --> 00:17:36,857
[Blows raspberries]
379
00:17:36,869 --> 00:17:38,365
Hitting them like crazy.
380
00:17:38,376 --> 00:17:40,934
Like, you women are
all crazy, and you suck.
381
00:17:40,952 --> 00:17:42,912
And Nellie Bly was like, aw, [Bleep].
382
00:17:42,926 --> 00:17:45,219
That ain't cool. I'm gonna write that down.
383
00:17:45,236 --> 00:17:47,330
These ladies are gonna get a word from me.
384
00:17:47,345 --> 00:17:51,865
She sees perfectly sane women
who just don't speak English.
385
00:17:51,896 --> 00:17:55,019
The doctors were like,
we don't speak German.
386
00:17:55,041 --> 00:17:56,802
You're crazy. [Blows raspberries]
387
00:17:56,815 --> 00:17:58,642
You go to the asylum for life.
388
00:17:58,656 --> 00:17:59,952
And there was a woman,
389
00:17:59,961 --> 00:18:01,821
she was like, I just
got a little overwhelmed.
390
00:18:01,835 --> 00:18:03,928
I'm not crazy.
391
00:18:03,943 --> 00:18:07,964
And they were like, this
woman is in... so insane.
392
00:18:07,992 --> 00:18:10,085
There's nothing we can do
but keep her locked up at this
393
00:18:10,100 --> 00:18:12,127
in-sylum forever.
394
00:18:12,142 --> 00:18:14,369
The insane asylum was horrible.
395
00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:17,375
And then there's the... the baths.
396
00:18:17,396 --> 00:18:20,587
The nurses would just scrub
the [Bleep] out of them,
397
00:18:20,609 --> 00:18:23,201
and Nellie Bly would be like,
this kind of hurts a little bit.
398
00:18:23,220 --> 00:18:26,809
She was like, you be quiet
or I will... I will... I will
399
00:18:26,834 --> 00:18:29,493
make you wish you never
said anything to me.
400
00:18:29,512 --> 00:18:31,438
I'll scrub you so hard.
401
00:18:31,452 --> 00:18:32,449
Wow.
402
00:18:32,457 --> 00:18:34,849
I got at least two bathing suits.
403
00:18:34,866 --> 00:18:37,291
Should we put them on and get in the tub?
404
00:18:37,308 --> 00:18:38,803
Really?
405
00:18:38,814 --> 00:18:41,406
You don't have the balls
to get in the tub with me
406
00:18:41,425 --> 00:18:44,051
with a bathing suit, do you?
407
00:18:44,069 --> 00:18:46,760
[Laughs]
408
00:18:46,780 --> 00:18:49,870
Joseph Pulitzer's like,
hey, guess what, dummies.
409
00:18:49,891 --> 00:18:51,453
She wasn't insane.
410
00:18:51,465 --> 00:18:54,090
And they were like, oh, no!
411
00:18:54,109 --> 00:18:56,409
We're exposed!
412
00:19:01,113 --> 00:19:02,842
I've got some Yogurt containers (Gasps)
413
00:19:02,855 --> 00:19:04,949
that we can pour over our heads.
414
00:19:04,964 --> 00:19:06,658
Ah.
415
00:19:06,671 --> 00:19:08,166
Look to the ceiling, Derek.
416
00:19:08,177 --> 00:19:11,200
Look at... oh, it's so much
more pleasant to pour water
417
00:19:11,221 --> 00:19:13,847
over your heads than my son.
418
00:19:13,866 --> 00:19:15,361
He makes such a fuss.
419
00:19:15,372 --> 00:19:17,564
This is such a delight.
420
00:19:17,580 --> 00:19:20,770
Nellie Bly had to take baths with,
421
00:19:20,792 --> 00:19:24,083
like, the dirt of 45 other girls on her,
422
00:19:24,106 --> 00:19:27,928
and it was freezing cold.
423
00:19:27,955 --> 00:19:31,910
She had this horrible
424
00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:35,293
ten days in an insane asylum.
425
00:19:35,316 --> 00:19:37,177
And then Joseph Pulitzer's like,
426
00:19:37,191 --> 00:19:39,950
"hey, guess what, dummies.
427
00:19:39,969 --> 00:19:44,190
Like, this crazy wave
girl was my sweet reporter,
428
00:19:44,220 --> 00:19:48,074
and she, um...
429
00:19:48,101 --> 00:19:50,602
And she...
430
00:19:53,957 --> 00:19:55,884
She wasn't insane.
431
00:19:55,898 --> 00:19:58,159
And they were like, oh, no!
432
00:19:58,175 --> 00:20:00,866
We're exposed!
433
00:20:00,885 --> 00:20:05,238
And she wrote an article
that exposed everybody.
434
00:20:05,269 --> 00:20:07,895
All of the sudden money
was flowing like crazy
435
00:20:07,913 --> 00:20:10,271
to mental health institutions.
436
00:20:10,288 --> 00:20:14,710
She changed the world of mental health.
437
00:20:14,741 --> 00:20:19,260
Nellie Bly was one of the
first great American feminists
438
00:20:19,291 --> 00:20:22,647
that said, listen, stupid 1880s guys
439
00:20:22,671 --> 00:20:27,024
with giant moustaches connected
to their stupid sideburns,
440
00:20:27,054 --> 00:20:32,040
women are really cool.
441
00:20:32,075 --> 00:20:36,163
That is basically how it
went except less kissing.
442
00:20:36,192 --> 00:20:38,186
[Laughs]
443
00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:41,267
Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no.
444
00:20:47,268 --> 00:20:55,268
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- www.addic7ed.com -
445
00:20:55,318 --> 00:20:59,868
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