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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:09,560 Laura? 2 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:13,600 I'll show you to your desk. 3 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,640 MUSIC: Beg For It by Iggy Azalea 4 00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:23,080 # Pulled up looking picture perfect, baby 5 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:25,760 # High price but I'm worth it, baby 6 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:27,880 # Can't play with ya, I've been busy working, baby 7 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,480 # Getting faded in the European swerving, ay 8 00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:33,560 # Look, describe Iggy ground-breaking what the word is 9 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:37,240 Hit the stage, ass shaking like I'm nervous... 10 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:41,280 Well, you know what to do. Yeah. 11 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:46,000 Make you beg for it, I'mma make you beg for it... 12 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:48,600 Gary, it's me. You're dumped. 13 00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:57,280 # I'm so excited 14 00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:03,240 Someday, someday, Leeds United. 15 00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:08,320 HE SNIFFS AND GROANS 16 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:17,080 So, you're not gay? No. 17 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:25,160 Are you waiting for something to clear up? No! 18 00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:29,280 It's OK if you've got a micro-penis, I can work around it. 19 00:01:29,320 --> 00:01:31,320 My penis is fine, Meg. 20 00:01:31,360 --> 00:01:35,360 I just didn't think last night felt like the right time, OK? 21 00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:40,880 Are you in a cult? Like I said, several times, I just want to wait. 22 00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:45,920 That was 12 hours ago, so, does that constitute enough wait? 23 00:01:45,960 --> 00:01:47,760 HE LAUGHS 24 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:51,800 That suits you, by the way. 25 00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:56,360 I should give you this back. Meg... 26 00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:01,280 I really like you, Meg. I really like you too, Andrew. 27 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:05,320 And it's not that I don't find you extremely sexy, I just... 28 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:09,400 I want our first time to be special. 29 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:12,240 Yeah, me too. 30 00:02:12,280 --> 00:02:14,240 I'm not in any rush. 31 00:02:14,280 --> 00:02:18,280 I'll make us some breakfast, then. Eggs royale OK? 32 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:40,920 SHE ROARS 33 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:44,040 POUNDING ON THE DOOR 34 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:48,080 Who goes there? It's Scott, I heard screaming, is everything OK? 35 00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:52,240 Scotty, hi. Oh, my God. Seriously frightening emergency situaish. 36 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:55,400 What happened? I was having my morning nap... Morning...? OK. 37 00:02:55,440 --> 00:02:59,440 And then I felt a hand. And then I saw her. 38 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:01,880 It was the ghost of Granny Primrose. 39 00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:04,600 OK, so everything is fine. No! 40 00:03:04,640 --> 00:03:06,680 What if I'm cursed? Like in The Ring. 41 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:09,600 OK, well, that's not going to happen, so... How do you know? 42 00:03:09,640 --> 00:03:13,360 Because curses aren't real and, I don't know, 43 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:16,920 maybe it was a good thing. Yes! Well, it's a sign. 44 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:19,160 I mean, I always knew I was special and gifted. 45 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:20,800 But now you're telling me I'm psychic. 46 00:03:20,840 --> 00:03:23,560 I didn't say you were psychic... I guess I always knew. 47 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:25,880 But I didn't KNOW know, you know? Better get to work. 48 00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:29,760 When you have a gift, Scott, it is your duty to share it. May I? 49 00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:32,320 Oh, Scotty. 50 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:34,920 This is very interesting. Yeah. Yeah. 51 00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:37,480 Patrick, Nathan. 52 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:39,760 I'll try and remember everyone's names. 53 00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:41,520 We're decorating a bit for Halloween. 54 00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:44,200 Didn't want you to be left out, so... Cheers. 55 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:47,480 Thought my first day would be scary enough, but... Rrraghh! 56 00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:49,080 ALL LAUGH 57 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:53,120 You doing anything for it? Halloween? Big-time. 58 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:57,480 I always go to my mate's house party. It's legendary. And sexy. 59 00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,720 Gets pretty out of control. 60 00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:04,760 It's wild, like me. You should come. 61 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:09,880 All of you. 62 00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:16,640 So now we have to have a Halloween party? 63 00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:20,040 We'll just put some Quavers in a bowl, WKD in a cauldron, 64 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:22,840 get some of those glow-in-the-dark skellies from the party shop, 65 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:25,640 hammer them into the wall. Bosh, it's party time. 66 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:29,040 I think that might have a pretty adverse effect on our tenancy agreement. 67 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:32,240 OK, guys, I am really interested in this, but me now. 68 00:04:32,280 --> 00:04:34,760 You won't believe this, but I'm psychic. 69 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,320 Yeah, you're right, I don't believe it. Meg! 70 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,160 I saw the ghost of Granny Primrose. 71 00:04:39,200 --> 00:04:42,200 Yeah, Granny Primrose is still alive. Is she? 72 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:43,360 Yes, she's alive, 73 00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:46,120 she just lives in a nursing home and you never go and see her. 74 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:48,360 Well, in my dream she was definitely dead, 75 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:52,400 so maybe that means that she's going to die and I've predicted it. 76 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:56,480 Well, she is 83. The point is, Meg, I have a psychic gift. 77 00:04:57,160 --> 00:04:59,840 Scott said so. He was really impressed. 78 00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:03,640 Scott? Not jealous, are we, Meg? You've got Andrew now. 79 00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:07,240 Yeah, I know. Don't get me wrong, Andrew ticks all the boxes. 80 00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:10,200 Fit, clever, texts me back on the same day. 81 00:05:10,240 --> 00:05:13,040 Has he ticked your box, though, Meg? Still no. 82 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:14,520 OM-Jesus, Meg. 83 00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:18,560 Isn't that, like, date four? Five. I think he's being a gentleman. 84 00:05:18,840 --> 00:05:20,120 Oof! What a turn-off. 85 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:23,600 And I'm trying to be cool about it, but... OK, real talk. 86 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:25,320 (I'm on a new pill...) 87 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:27,800 Why are you whispering? It's just us. 88 00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:31,840 I'm on a new pill and it's making me very...charged. Sexually. 89 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:35,080 Soggy box? 90 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,480 Yeah, I had to rub one out in his en-suite. 91 00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:39,200 Ugh! Now I've got that image. 92 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:41,800 Right, it's time to bring out the big guns. 93 00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:44,640 If he's playing hard to get, you play it harder. 94 00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:48,680 Be demure, mysterious, coy. 95 00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:52,760 I can do that. 96 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,160 Ugh! 97 00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:56,960 I'm fine! I'm fine! 98 00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:58,800 Sorry! 99 00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:00,720 SLURRING: Welcome to my house. 100 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:03,240 Would you like to come in for a nightcap? 101 00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:06,560 Nightcap's code for sex. 102 00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:07,880 Right. 103 00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:09,360 Shh! 104 00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:12,600 Oh, hey, party people! 105 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:16,640 Hello. Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah! 106 00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:20,040 Hi! I'm Andrew. Bunny, hi. 107 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,120 I'm starving, is there anything to eat? 108 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:25,240 Did someone have a few drinks? Someone did, yes. 109 00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:27,360 Do you want a cheese stick, Andrew? 110 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,800 No, thanks. I'm sober. 111 00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:32,160 Oh, I do. Uhh! 112 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,720 SCREAMING ON TV What film is this? 113 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:38,720 Dracteria Bloodcastle. It's amazing. God, I hate these films. 114 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:40,400 Pure patriarchal fantasy. 115 00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:43,000 If you ask me, fetishising violence against women, now, 116 00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:45,520 that is the scariest thing about Halloween, know what I mean? 117 00:06:45,560 --> 00:06:49,560 What have you had for dinner, a dictionary? Andrew's a feminist. 118 00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:55,920 HE CLEARS HIS THROAT 119 00:06:55,960 --> 00:06:58,800 Shall I show you le boudoir, Andrew? 120 00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:02,840 Are you going to be OK up the ladder, Meg? The ladder? 121 00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:07,160 Have you seriously got a five-star Uber rating? 122 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:10,240 Probably not any more, no. Come on. 123 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:14,280 This way, please, boy. 124 00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:19,880 Look, I know you want to wait but I think we should just shag now 125 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:22,520 and get it over with. You're very drunk. 126 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,000 I'm not that drunk. 127 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:27,720 So you don't have to worry, it wouldn't be rape cos I'm up for it. 128 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:30,280 I'm saying yes, please, have sex with me. 129 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:33,000 Feel down here if you don't believe me, I've got a well soggy box. 130 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:37,040 OK, yeah, wow. Yeah. Thank you. 131 00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:41,120 I better go, I've got work in the morning. So do I, big deal. 132 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:44,080 Come here. 133 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:48,120 MUSIC: I Only Have Eyes For You by The Flamingos 134 00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:58,400 Lie down. 135 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:15,000 Oh, what, are you tucking me in?! Sweet dreams. 136 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:21,760 Oh, don't go. Please! 137 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:25,280 SHE SIGHS 138 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:29,320 It's unlimited broadband, for 18 months, that's the fibre-optic. 139 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,200 Laura Wiley, sign here, please. 140 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,960 Sorry, do you mind holding for one moment? 141 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,880 Gaz, what the fuck are you doing here, you wank? 142 00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:41,120 I needed to see you. You can't just leave without any explanation. 143 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:45,040 I've told you, I'm focusing on my career. Everything OK? Who are you? 144 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:46,480 I'm her boyfriend. 145 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:49,240 Well, I guess we'll be seeing you at this epic Halloween party, then. 146 00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:52,920 What epic Halloween party? You're not invited. 147 00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:55,840 I know what's happening here, Laura. All these men are gorgeous. 148 00:08:55,880 --> 00:08:57,440 All right, gay! 149 00:08:57,480 --> 00:09:00,000 Please, Laura! Gaz, get out. 150 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,360 Before I have you thrown out. 151 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:04,800 Security! He's not a real courier! 152 00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:05,880 He's not my boyfriend. 153 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,760 He's more like a stalker that I barely know. 154 00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,040 So, you coming to the party, then? 155 00:09:11,080 --> 00:09:14,360 Yeah, I might come by later. Might? 156 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:17,280 What, what time might you come? 157 00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:19,960 I'll text you. Back to work, you. 158 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:23,480 Let's sell the shit out of this broadband. 159 00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:27,520 (Fucking might!) 160 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:32,360 Oh. Hi, Scott. Hi. 161 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:36,400 I just want to say thank you so much for enlightening me about my gift. 162 00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:38,880 Sorry? My psychic abilities. 163 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:41,960 I'd love to repay the favour if you'll let me. 164 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,520 We're having a get-together. 165 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:45,200 On Friday night, yeah, Laura told me. 166 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,160 Something about a slutty Halloween party? 167 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:50,760 Oh, Laura, how uncouth. No, no, no, no, no. 168 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,480 You see, for me, as a psychic, 169 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:56,520 Halloween is really more about exploring the veil between 170 00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,240 the living and the dead when it's at its thinnest. 171 00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:03,280 So do I need to wear a costume? Yes, please. OK. 172 00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:09,720 Well, we both look sensaish. 173 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:11,760 You should seriously wear that outfit more often. 174 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:15,800 Guys, are you ready to be afraid? 175 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:24,240 What even are you? I'm the scariest thing of all, the patriarchy. 176 00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:28,480 Props - briefcase, full of porn, sexist. 177 00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:32,560 And binoculars, with which to objectify women. 178 00:10:34,440 --> 00:10:37,040 Oooh! Boobies! 179 00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:40,400 It's so political, Andrew is going to love it. This ain't happening. 180 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:41,880 What? It's a joke. 181 00:10:41,920 --> 00:10:44,760 Meg, men hate it when girls make jokes, everyone knows that. 182 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:48,360 Just to be clear, you two still haven't fucked? No. 183 00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:53,500 Right, you're getting changed. Oh, come on! It's mega-LOLs. 184 00:10:53,860 --> 00:10:57,740 You sure about this? Much better. Now you look like her. 185 00:10:57,780 --> 00:11:00,740 Yeah. It's definitely really political. 186 00:11:00,780 --> 00:11:04,060 I can't take any more rejection from Andrew. It's make or break tonight. 187 00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:07,540 If you're really desperate you can always do the Come Bluff. Good call! 188 00:11:07,580 --> 00:11:09,620 Wait, the what? What is it? 189 00:11:09,660 --> 00:11:11,220 The Come Bluff. 190 00:11:11,260 --> 00:11:15,260 It's a technique I normally save for the truly unattainable Grade A hottie. 191 00:11:15,780 --> 00:11:19,500 Wh-What is it? You just tell them you haven't come from sex before. 192 00:11:19,540 --> 00:11:20,940 They can't resist the challenge. 193 00:11:20,980 --> 00:11:22,260 Wow! 194 00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:23,700 God, I hate this bit before a party 195 00:11:23,780 --> 00:11:25,580 and you feel like no-one is going to turn up. 196 00:11:25,620 --> 00:11:28,220 You have invited people, haven't you? 197 00:11:28,260 --> 00:11:30,020 Who have YOU invited? 198 00:11:30,060 --> 00:11:32,860 Just spirits, but obviously only I can communicate with them. 199 00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:34,340 Soz, guys. 200 00:11:34,380 --> 00:11:38,220 Yeah, yeah, they're here. Oh, and Scott, bless him. 201 00:11:38,260 --> 00:11:40,260 I think he might be in love with me. 202 00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:43,500 We shared my spiritual awakening. You mean he wants to fuck you. 203 00:11:43,540 --> 00:11:46,620 Tonight is about channelling my gift, sex doesn't come into it. 204 00:11:46,660 --> 00:11:48,380 I mean, your tits are right out. 205 00:11:48,420 --> 00:11:52,420 The call centre hottie said they might not come till later. Might?! 206 00:11:52,580 --> 00:11:53,820 KNOCK ON DOOR 207 00:11:53,860 --> 00:11:56,180 Right, get the music on. 208 00:11:56,220 --> 00:11:58,780 Remember, slutty party, guys. 209 00:11:58,820 --> 00:12:00,820 MUSIC STARTS 210 00:12:00,860 --> 00:12:03,980 It's someone dressed as Santa. Oh, and Andrew! 211 00:12:04,020 --> 00:12:07,700 OK, make it look like we having fun. Let's dance. 212 00:12:07,740 --> 00:12:09,380 Dance! 213 00:12:09,420 --> 00:12:11,740 Sluttier! 214 00:12:11,780 --> 00:12:13,100 Slutty fun! 215 00:12:13,140 --> 00:12:17,140 Ready? 216 00:12:17,580 --> 00:12:21,580 Andrew! Do come in! 217 00:12:22,660 --> 00:12:26,660 Oh! Hey. You came. That's, that's...that's cool. 218 00:12:27,340 --> 00:12:28,340 Sorry, I didn't see you. 219 00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:32,340 I was just busy dancing and having a great time. 220 00:12:32,380 --> 00:12:35,180 Is that Nathan? Who's Nathan?! 221 00:12:35,220 --> 00:12:38,100 Gary, out, now! You look...nice. 222 00:12:38,140 --> 00:12:41,260 What are you supposed to be? I'm a porn person. 223 00:12:41,300 --> 00:12:45,300 It's... It's political. How? 224 00:12:45,380 --> 00:12:47,180 Empowering. 225 00:12:47,220 --> 00:12:49,700 Look, I know it's over and you've moved on. 226 00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:53,380 You've been wasting your time with a loser like me for too long now. 227 00:12:53,420 --> 00:12:57,420 Correct. Let me come to your party. I'll be no trouble. 228 00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:58,820 All right, you can stay, 229 00:12:58,860 --> 00:13:01,380 because I need to get my numbers up in case my fit workmates come. 230 00:13:01,420 --> 00:13:03,860 And if they do come, you can leave. Deal? 231 00:13:03,900 --> 00:13:06,180 Deal. KNOCK ON DOOR 232 00:13:06,220 --> 00:13:10,220 It's Scott! And someone else. I can't see who. Let's dance. 233 00:13:10,460 --> 00:13:14,460 Dance! He's made a real effort for me, bless him! 234 00:13:16,460 --> 00:13:18,900 Scott, hi! Oh. 235 00:13:18,940 --> 00:13:22,940 Who are you? This is Lizzie, my... girlfriend? 236 00:13:26,300 --> 00:13:28,500 Hi. 237 00:13:28,540 --> 00:13:31,860 Hi. 238 00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:34,900 You know I love you like a woman but I... 239 00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:38,940 Happy Halloween! ALL: Happy Halloween! 240 00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:43,580 ALL: Eurgh! 241 00:13:43,620 --> 00:13:44,940 What's in that?! 242 00:13:44,980 --> 00:13:47,980 My special recipe - beer, absinthe, whisky, 243 00:13:48,020 --> 00:13:49,540 rum, wine... 244 00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:52,580 orange squash, milk... 245 00:13:52,620 --> 00:13:56,620 So, Lizzie... Has Scott told you I'm psychic? Psychic? Well! Yes. 246 00:13:58,020 --> 00:13:59,940 It is impressive, isn't it? 247 00:13:59,980 --> 00:14:03,980 Oh! The spirits! Oh, they're getting restless! 248 00:14:05,380 --> 00:14:08,980 It's time for the s?ance to commence. Fucking hell. 249 00:14:09,020 --> 00:14:11,220 Guys, as it's Halloween, 250 00:14:11,260 --> 00:14:14,820 the veil between the living and the dead is at its thinnest, 251 00:14:14,860 --> 00:14:18,500 so I'm going to use my gift to contact spirits or souls 252 00:14:18,540 --> 00:14:21,580 using a method called souling. Souling? 253 00:14:21,620 --> 00:14:25,180 Is that short for ARSE-holing? I love you. Shut up. 254 00:14:25,220 --> 00:14:28,500 OK, I'm channelling the other side now. Does anybody have 255 00:14:28,540 --> 00:14:30,020 anything they'd like to ask? 256 00:14:30,060 --> 00:14:32,220 Yep. What time is Nathan getting here? 257 00:14:32,260 --> 00:14:33,940 I'm not going to bother the spirits with that. 258 00:14:33,980 --> 00:14:37,060 Do you have a proper question? Yep. How long are we doing this bollocks? 259 00:14:37,100 --> 00:14:39,980 I don't think it's bollocks. Thank you, Lizzie. 260 00:14:40,020 --> 00:14:44,020 And I will start with you. Could you cross my palm with silver? 261 00:14:45,020 --> 00:14:49,020 Oh... 262 00:14:52,940 --> 00:14:56,940 Hm, this is interesting. This is about your relationship. 263 00:14:57,020 --> 00:15:00,100 You're in a new relationship, am I right? Yes! 264 00:15:00,140 --> 00:15:04,140 I sensed that. You didn't really sense it, though. 265 00:15:07,380 --> 00:15:09,940 I mean... 266 00:15:09,980 --> 00:15:10,980 Oh... 267 00:15:11,020 --> 00:15:14,380 Oh, no, is it bad? Yep. This does denote death. 268 00:15:14,420 --> 00:15:15,620 Oh, my God! 269 00:15:15,660 --> 00:15:19,460 You might not die, it just means the relationship itself is doomed. 270 00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:21,780 Bloody hell, Bunny! Oh, no! 271 00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:23,780 It's not real! 272 00:15:23,820 --> 00:15:27,820 Shall we play a game? ALL: Yes! No, no, wait! Oh! 273 00:15:28,300 --> 00:15:30,820 OK... I'm getting something... 274 00:15:30,860 --> 00:15:33,380 I'm getting a spirit of... It's a man. 275 00:15:33,420 --> 00:15:37,300 Does that mean anything to anybody? No. He's northern. 276 00:15:37,340 --> 00:15:40,980 Ask him if his name is Nigel. Of course it's not fucking Nigel, Gary! 277 00:15:41,020 --> 00:15:45,020 It might be! It is Nigel! Uncle Nige! Yeah, he's saying... 278 00:15:46,460 --> 00:15:50,460 GRUFF NORTHERN ACCENT: Sorry I had to go. Yeah? 279 00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:54,700 He only died a few weeks ago. Is he OK? No, Gary, he's dead. 280 00:15:55,700 --> 00:15:57,820 You were quite close, weren't you? Yeah. 281 00:15:57,860 --> 00:16:00,100 After me dad left, my mum were left on her own with me and my 282 00:16:00,140 --> 00:16:02,900 brother, so Uncle Nige were the closest thing I had to a real... 283 00:16:02,940 --> 00:16:04,300 ..thing you had to a real dad. 284 00:16:04,340 --> 00:16:05,660 GARY SOBS 285 00:16:05,700 --> 00:16:08,980 Fuck's sake! Sorry... Nothing to be embarrassed about, mate. 286 00:16:09,020 --> 00:16:12,340 He's saying... Hi, Gary. 287 00:16:12,380 --> 00:16:14,420 Hi, Nige. 288 00:16:14,460 --> 00:16:18,460 He is wearing trousers! Yeah! He always wore trousers! 289 00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:21,940 And he has...he has a wallet. Nige... 290 00:16:21,980 --> 00:16:25,980 And...a pen and paper! That makes sense! He always wrote stuff down! 291 00:16:27,460 --> 00:16:29,380 What else? Ask him if he's met Prince. 292 00:16:29,420 --> 00:16:31,380 Urrghhh! 293 00:16:31,420 --> 00:16:34,420 Eurgh... 294 00:16:34,460 --> 00:16:35,980 He's gone now. 295 00:16:36,020 --> 00:16:38,460 But it just goes to show that the souls of the dead, 296 00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:40,100 they never leave us. 297 00:16:40,140 --> 00:16:41,500 That's ?5, Gary. 298 00:16:41,540 --> 00:16:44,580 Right, drinking game. ALL: Yes! 299 00:16:44,620 --> 00:16:47,140 I'm not done yet. You're being a buzz kill! 300 00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:48,660 This isn't a slutty party! 301 00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:51,100 Let's play I've Never. Everyone knows the rules? 302 00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:54,180 If you have done it, you drink. If you haven't done it, you don't. 303 00:16:54,220 --> 00:16:57,540 I've never witnessed such disrespect for the dead! That's not the game. 304 00:16:57,580 --> 00:16:59,740 I've never been so heartbroken in all me life. 305 00:16:59,780 --> 00:17:03,780 No. I've never been so in love. Again, it's not the game. 306 00:17:04,740 --> 00:17:08,740 I've never come from having sex. 307 00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:12,380 Really?! 308 00:17:12,420 --> 00:17:16,420 Are you sure? Mm-hm. 309 00:17:17,140 --> 00:17:21,140 So did you just fake it, then, or what? 310 00:17:22,820 --> 00:17:26,700 No. But... Never come from having sex, Scott, so let's just drop it. 311 00:17:26,740 --> 00:17:30,500 That can't possibly be true. All right, Scott, just leave it. 312 00:17:30,540 --> 00:17:31,940 Why do you care so much, anyway? 313 00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:33,460 I'm just curious. 314 00:17:33,500 --> 00:17:36,660 Shall we play a different game? ALL: Yeah! 315 00:17:36,700 --> 00:17:40,700 Have you two had sex? Yeah, we have, but it was no big deal. 316 00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:43,380 I was talking about Scott and Meg. 317 00:17:43,420 --> 00:17:47,420 Oh, sorry. Yeah, they have, yeah. What the fuck?! 318 00:17:48,380 --> 00:17:51,100 Right, I see. Please don't leave. Just going to the toilet. 319 00:17:51,140 --> 00:17:52,780 All right, fine. Just let me explain... 320 00:17:52,820 --> 00:17:55,500 Why would you take me to a party where you'd slept with two people? 321 00:17:55,540 --> 00:17:58,700 Anyone else in the building you've slept with? Lizzie, don't leave! 322 00:17:58,740 --> 00:18:01,780 Lizzie! 323 00:18:01,820 --> 00:18:05,180 Thanks a lot, guys. Great party. 324 00:18:05,220 --> 00:18:08,860 Oh, boy! Somebody wasn't ready to hear the truth. I'll go over now. 325 00:18:08,900 --> 00:18:10,460 Scott will need me. 326 00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:14,180 Bunny, just leave it! You've already caused a massive fight. 327 00:18:14,220 --> 00:18:17,580 I think you've done enough. Oh, you can never do enough, Meg. 328 00:18:17,620 --> 00:18:21,620 Not when you have...the gift. 329 00:18:23,140 --> 00:18:26,780 And she just shattered all hopes of me ever sleeping with Andrew. 330 00:18:26,820 --> 00:18:30,820 It's a bust all round. Party's over. Nathan is not coming, is he? 331 00:18:31,100 --> 00:18:33,500 Who is Nathan?! The guy I want to fuck, Gaz. 332 00:18:33,540 --> 00:18:34,860 GARY SOBS QUIETLY 333 00:18:34,900 --> 00:18:37,220 Bollocks. I look well hot, an' all! 334 00:18:37,260 --> 00:18:38,580 What a waste! 335 00:18:38,620 --> 00:18:42,620 KNOCK ON DOOR Scott, is everything all right? 336 00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:45,180 I just want to say I'm sorry. 337 00:18:45,220 --> 00:18:48,740 I'm sorry that my psychic abilities caused your rift. 338 00:18:48,780 --> 00:18:51,100 Not only between this world and the next, 339 00:18:51,140 --> 00:18:53,580 but also in your most sacred relationship. 340 00:18:53,620 --> 00:18:56,700 You're not psychic, Bunny, you're psychotic. 341 00:18:56,740 --> 00:18:58,740 Then how do you explain me predicting the end of your 342 00:18:58,780 --> 00:19:00,620 relationship with Lizzie? 343 00:19:00,660 --> 00:19:04,660 Bunny! What?! Thank you so much for just laying it all out in the open. 344 00:19:05,820 --> 00:19:09,340 Me and Scott talked about it and... he explained to you meant nothing. 345 00:19:09,380 --> 00:19:13,060 Nothing at all. That it was just meaningless. Clinical, if anything. 346 00:19:13,100 --> 00:19:15,700 Worked the whole thing out. 347 00:19:15,740 --> 00:19:19,740 Good. Thank God for your psychic abilities, we're stronger than ever. 348 00:19:23,380 --> 00:19:27,380 PASSIONATE MOANING 349 00:19:27,460 --> 00:19:29,340 DOOR SLAMS 350 00:19:29,380 --> 00:19:33,380 Yup. 351 00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,060 Best be off then. 352 00:19:40,100 --> 00:19:43,300 One more drink? 353 00:19:43,340 --> 00:19:44,500 Before you go... 354 00:19:44,540 --> 00:19:48,540 OK. 355 00:19:52,420 --> 00:19:54,340 FIZZING 356 00:19:54,380 --> 00:19:58,380 To mates! Mates! 357 00:20:00,860 --> 00:20:04,140 Outfit suits you, by the way. So does yours. 358 00:20:04,180 --> 00:20:08,020 I quite like you with a beard. 359 00:20:08,060 --> 00:20:12,060 Do you want to come and sit on Santa's knee? Just as mates, like. 360 00:20:14,140 --> 00:20:18,140 All right. 361 00:20:23,340 --> 00:20:27,340 Can mates still kiss? 362 00:20:29,300 --> 00:20:32,260 He was a fling, he was just a shag. Just a... 363 00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:34,820 meaningless notch on the bedpost. 364 00:20:34,860 --> 00:20:38,860 He seemed like a nice guy. Lovely bloke. But, er... 365 00:20:39,380 --> 00:20:43,020 just a fling, really... 366 00:20:43,060 --> 00:20:45,540 This is exactly what I'm worried about. 367 00:20:45,580 --> 00:20:49,180 I want more with you, than just...sex. 368 00:20:49,220 --> 00:20:50,940 Definitely! Yeah. 369 00:20:50,980 --> 00:20:54,380 I've been in this situation before and I don't want to get hurt. 370 00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:58,420 I trust you. That's why I've waited. 371 00:20:58,700 --> 00:21:02,700 I just think it's so important that we're honest with each other. 372 00:21:02,740 --> 00:21:05,020 Yeah, I completely agree. 373 00:21:05,060 --> 00:21:09,060 We should absolutely be honest with each other. 374 00:21:10,140 --> 00:21:14,140 So is it true that you've never come from sex before? 375 00:21:14,700 --> 00:21:18,700 Yeah. Well, um... Maybe we should rectify that. 376 00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:24,620 # I do what I love and I love what I do 377 00:21:24,660 --> 00:21:28,660 Stop me, stop me I'm stopping you. 378 00:21:29,020 --> 00:21:31,940 Are you sure this is OK? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fine. 379 00:21:31,980 --> 00:21:33,500 Just put it straight in. 380 00:21:33,540 --> 00:21:35,580 Ohhh! 381 00:21:35,620 --> 00:21:38,820 Oh, thank God! Oh! Ohhh! 382 00:21:38,860 --> 00:21:40,500 OHHH! 383 00:21:40,540 --> 00:21:43,860 Aaahhhh... 384 00:21:43,900 --> 00:21:46,300 Wow! 385 00:21:46,340 --> 00:21:50,340 Um... Aaahhh... 386 00:21:51,740 --> 00:21:55,300 Actually, can we stop? It's just... 387 00:21:55,340 --> 00:21:59,340 I'm not really feeling it now that I've... 388 00:21:59,620 --> 00:22:03,620 Yep. Sure? Yeah, cheers. 389 00:22:04,180 --> 00:22:06,660 PASSIONATE MOANING Jesus! 390 00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:09,700 Close the deal, Gary! I'm closing it! 391 00:22:09,740 --> 00:22:12,660 Hello, can we...? 392 00:22:12,700 --> 00:22:14,300 Hi. 393 00:22:14,340 --> 00:22:16,180 Everything...all right? 394 00:22:16,220 --> 00:22:17,540 Yeah... 395 00:22:17,580 --> 00:22:20,260 You've met Gary? 396 00:22:20,300 --> 00:22:22,740 All right, mate? STRANGULATED: All right. 397 00:22:22,780 --> 00:22:26,500 Guys, can you keep it down...? 398 00:22:26,540 --> 00:22:28,220 What's all the commosh? 399 00:22:28,260 --> 00:22:30,060 GARY GASPS AND WHIMPERS 400 00:22:30,100 --> 00:22:34,100 Ohhh-ohhh-ohhh! 401 00:22:34,780 --> 00:22:38,700 Has he just...? No. Yeah. 402 00:22:38,740 --> 00:22:40,900 Shall we...go? ALL: Yeah. 403 00:22:40,940 --> 00:22:43,340 We're going to go. See you Monday, Laura. 404 00:22:43,380 --> 00:22:45,380 Shall we...? Yeah. 405 00:22:45,420 --> 00:22:49,420 Ahem... 406 00:22:51,300 --> 00:22:53,140 Oh... Thanks a lot, Santa! 407 00:22:53,180 --> 00:22:57,180 Get out! Ohhh... And take the bins with you! 408 00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:04,380 Out! 409 00:23:07,340 --> 00:23:11,340 # I'm on my way 410 00:23:12,300 --> 00:23:14,900 # I'm on my way 411 00:23:14,940 --> 00:23:17,460 # On my way to hell 412 00:23:17,500 --> 00:23:21,500 # And I'll be late 413 00:23:22,020 --> 00:23:26,020 # I will be late I've got time to kill 414 00:23:28,900 --> 00:23:32,900 And I've been drinking for two whole days. 415 00:23:32,950 --> 00:23:37,500 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32262

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