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[LIVELY JAZZ MUSIC]
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Everybody's gonna be
pumped to see the plate man.
3
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No, they're not, baby.
4
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Oh, here comes the plate man!
5
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Can't have a barbecue without plates!
6
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Uncle George, look at this!
7
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Paper bowls for dips, sides.
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Hey, hey! Plate man!
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00:00:19,646 --> 00:00:22,582
- Hi, Mom.
- Chrissy, you look
10
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- beautiful in purple.
- My baby.
11
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And look at Tim. Don't you look cute.
12
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Oh, thank you.
13
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- Yeah, he knows.
- Hi, David! George!
14
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Aww...
15
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Sam's here.
16
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?
17
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Who's he with?
18
00:00:40,270 --> 00:00:41,726
Sam, who are you with? Who are you?
19
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Uh, I'm Shannon.
20
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This is Shannon, Tim.
21
00:00:44,287 --> 00:00:45,755
Hi, Shannon. Who are you?
22
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[CLEARS] She's my girlfriend.
23
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Girlfriend?
24
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Since when?
25
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Ah, feels like a day,
it's been so much fun.
26
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- How long?
- I don't know.
27
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It's been a blur, it's been so much fun.
28
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- How long?
- It's been a blur.
29
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- How long?
- A month!
30
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A whole friggin' month!
31
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You've had a girlfriend
that you've hid from me
32
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- for a month?
- I know!
33
00:01:07,985 --> 00:01:09,186
Well, technically, babe,
34
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it's about five weeks.
35
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Tim, it's your own friggin' fault, okay?
36
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I... you can be difficult
to introduce new people to.
37
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- Why?
- Why?
38
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[LAUGHS] This guy says "why?"
39
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Because, Tim, you can be a little harsh.
40
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[LAUGHS] Harsh?
41
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Harsh?
42
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Okay, Shannon, how are you?
43
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- Uh...
- You look lovely.
44
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Is that blouse from Ann Taylor?
45
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- No.
- Well, someone should tell
46
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Ann Taylor, because they
have a very similar one.
47
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What are you even
trying to go for with this?
48
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I shop for Chrissy at Ann Taylor.
49
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I'm just saying, I think
they'd be very interested
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in knowing that someone's
selling a cheaper version.
51
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How do you know this one's cheaper?
52
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'Cause I shop for Chrissy
at Ann Taylor, idiot!
53
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It could be nicer, dillweed.
54
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It's... not!
55
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Um, nice to meet you, Tim.
56
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I've... heard lots about you.
57
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All good things, I'm sure.
58
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Yeah.
59
00:02:02,488 --> 00:02:03,937
- Let's go say hi to my mom.
- Okay.
60
00:02:03,962 --> 00:02:05,003
- What did you bring, slop?
- No.
61
00:02:05,028 --> 00:02:05,970
Come on, now.
62
00:02:06,003 --> 00:02:07,138
? Next time ?
63
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? When they ask you ?
64
00:02:08,439 --> 00:02:10,380
? Where you're from ?
65
00:02:10,405 --> 00:02:11,521
? You gon' say Detroit city ?
66
00:02:11,683 --> 00:02:13,820
? When we get back
on our feet, yeah ?
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Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
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[FUNKY JAZZ MUSIC]
69
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Oh, my God, it's Shannon Coyne.
70
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- That's Shannon Coyne.
- You got to be cool.
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I'm being cool.
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[SHUSHING] Wow, Shannon Coyne.
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Oh, we grew up listening to
your family's gospel music.
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- Thank you.
- So what's it like
75
00:02:32,859 --> 00:02:34,260
dating a celebrity?
76
00:02:34,294 --> 00:02:35,795
Oh, I don't know, babe. What's it like?
77
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- [LAUGHTER]
- Oh, Sam.
78
00:02:37,234 --> 00:02:39,270
- She's talking about me.
- I know, I was joking.
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How do you get up in
front of all those people?
80
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I would be so scared.
81
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You know, actually I have stage fright,
82
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so I get up there
83
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and I close my eyes
84
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and I... ? Sing from my heart ?
85
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[LAUGHS]
86
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Yeah, would you like to take a selfie?
87
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You know who that is?
88
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That's Sam's girlfriend.
89
00:03:01,539 --> 00:03:02,548
Hm.
90
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I know. He hid it from me for a month
91
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because I'm too harsh.
92
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Well, Tim, you can be harsh.
93
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Maybe Sam just want to
build something first
94
00:03:12,390 --> 00:03:13,709
before you bulldozed it.
95
00:03:13,709 --> 00:03:15,073
Bulldozed it?
96
00:03:15,811 --> 00:03:19,364
I have been nothing but lovely
to all Sam's girlfriends.
97
00:03:20,203 --> 00:03:23,073
I was a perfect gentleman
to Dump Truck Debra.
98
00:03:23,655 --> 00:03:25,084
I've been nice to all of them.
99
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Stupid Sarah, Dumb Beth,
100
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Debbie "The Animal" Steel, the Worm.
101
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- Tim.
- I was so nice to the Worm.
102
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Would you listen to yourself?
103
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You're harsh as hell.
104
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Okay, if it's because I'm too harsh,
105
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then how come he kept it a
secret from the whole family.
106
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He didn't tell your parents,
107
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Aunt Lacey, your grandma, you.
108
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Holy shit.
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You knew.
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Oh, my God, you all knew.
111
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The whole family knew, and they lied to me.
112
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They lied to my face!
113
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- Well...
- You're a family of liars!
114
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Big, fake liars!
115
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Liar!
116
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- Hey, girl!
- I love your hair.
117
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?
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Welcome, welcome, one and all
119
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to the Duvet family reunion!
120
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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
121
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We got drinks and, of course,
122
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we've got the annual basketball game,
123
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which my team has won six years in a row.
124
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Now listen, over 30 years ago,
125
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I took over the position as
grill master from my father.
126
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Today it gives me great honor
127
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to pass this on to my son,
128
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Samuel!
129
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Have you all met his new girlfriend?
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Shannon Coyne!
131
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Yes!
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Good looks, personality, and lineage.
133
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Yes, I'm telling you,
she is the total package.
134
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And she's a celebrity.
135
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Come on up here, son.
136
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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
137
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Ah. Thanks, Dad.
138
00:05:00,477 --> 00:05:01,971
You know, this is an honor
139
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I've waited for my entire life.
140
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In fact, when I was 7, I wrote a speech
141
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I bring with me every reunion.
142
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- Should I read it?
- ALL: Yes!
143
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- Should I read it?
- ALL: Yes!
144
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- Should I read this here speech?
- ALL: Yes!
145
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Well, if you insist. [LAUGHS]
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"Friends, Duvets, and guests,
147
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"I am honored to be your grill master.
148
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"It's an achievement I rank up there
149
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with my black belt in tae kwon do"...
150
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Oop, never did that.
151
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Let's see. Oop.
152
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Never did that.
153
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"Quick thank you to Grandpa Charles."
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He's dead. Sad.
155
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Uh, didn't do that.
156
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"Marry Mom"?
157
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- [LAUGHS]
- I was 7, again,
158
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when I wrote this, so...
159
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Still seems kind of old to want to do that.
160
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Really should have looked over
this at some point since then.
161
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Oh, "And never getting in a car"
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with a stranger"
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'cause stranger danger."
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Hmm? Never did that.
165
00:06:01,656 --> 00:06:03,888
So... and you shouldn't,
so that's a good thing.
166
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Kids, learn from it.
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Ah, thank you!
168
00:06:06,352 --> 00:06:07,475
Uh, yep.
169
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Thank you very much, son.
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[GROANS]
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All right.
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I hope your bellies are empty
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and you're ready for fun,
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because the Duvet family reunion
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has officially begun!
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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
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[FUNKY JAZZ MUSIC]
178
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?
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Medium rare for the gentleman.
180
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And for the lady...
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- Ooh!
- Well done.
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- All right, man.
- Ange, you want a hot dog?
183
00:06:37,822 --> 00:06:39,557
- [CLATTERING]
- [WHOOSH]
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Whoo! Now that's a hot dog.
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Am I right? Am I right?
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Here you go.
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You know your dad was
supposed to be pass long
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grill master to me.
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But, see, I just quit drinking,
190
00:06:51,581 --> 00:06:53,349
and so I got the shakes,
191
00:06:53,549 --> 00:06:55,283
but I'm happier, healthier.
192
00:06:55,476 --> 00:06:57,764
Oh! What you got there, man?
193
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That smell like Crown Royal.
194
00:07:01,391 --> 00:07:03,162
Ladies, may I?
195
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Of course, sweetie. Come on.
196
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No paper bowls, huh?
197
00:07:07,106 --> 00:07:08,489
Just cream corn touching everything?
198
00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:10,674
Oh, we were just talking
about how nice it is
199
00:07:10,699 --> 00:07:13,421
that Sam could meet
himself a gospel singer.
200
00:07:13,421 --> 00:07:15,480
I heard the whole
family sing at Chene Park.
201
00:07:15,525 --> 00:07:17,741
- Beautiful.
- So talented.
202
00:07:17,773 --> 00:07:19,541
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, yeah,
203
00:07:19,575 --> 00:07:21,210
but there's really no way to tell.
204
00:07:21,243 --> 00:07:23,768
I mean, it's not like you
can boo a gospel singer.
205
00:07:25,637 --> 00:07:27,896
No, she's... she is so nice.
206
00:07:28,117 --> 00:07:31,053
She's lovely, lovely.
207
00:07:31,086 --> 00:07:34,034
But did anybody taste
208
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the potato salad she brought?
209
00:07:36,558 --> 00:07:38,761
I mean, I don't want to say it's bland,
210
00:07:38,794 --> 00:07:40,596
but I saw a fly land on it,
211
00:07:40,933 --> 00:07:42,611
fly away, come back with some salt.
212
00:07:42,611 --> 00:07:45,285
- [LAUGHTER]
- Tim! You're bad.
213
00:07:45,581 --> 00:07:47,383
Potato salad?
More like "poor" -tato salad.
214
00:07:47,416 --> 00:07:49,467
[LAUGHTER] Yeah.
215
00:07:50,114 --> 00:07:52,054
Look, look, look on the bright side.
216
00:07:52,088 --> 00:07:54,356
At least we know Sam's
gonna lose some weight.
217
00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:56,471
Oh! [LAUGHTER]
218
00:07:58,527 --> 00:08:00,062
Too much she can't lose any weight
219
00:08:00,096 --> 00:08:02,064
in that big ol' head of hers.
220
00:08:02,098 --> 00:08:04,100
- Whoo!
- [LAUGHTER]
221
00:08:04,133 --> 00:08:06,635
She walk by and I
thought it was an eclipse!
222
00:08:06,669 --> 00:08:07,937
[LAUGHTER]
223
00:08:07,970 --> 00:08:10,423
Aunt Lacey! Aunt Lacey's joining!
224
00:08:10,423 --> 00:08:13,650
Let's just hope Sam
likes doing neck rubs,
225
00:08:13,675 --> 00:08:16,278
'cause that neck of
hers is doing some work.
226
00:08:16,311 --> 00:08:18,179
- Yeah.
- [LAUGHTER]
227
00:08:18,213 --> 00:08:20,682
Looking like a lollipop
in knockoff Ann Taylor.
228
00:08:20,715 --> 00:08:22,684
Yes! Yes, it is!
229
00:08:22,717 --> 00:08:24,085
- It's knockoff!
- I know.
230
00:08:24,119 --> 00:08:26,655
[LAUGHTER]
231
00:08:26,688 --> 00:08:28,657
- Hey.
- Hi, Shannon. Hope you're having fun.
232
00:08:28,690 --> 00:08:29,891
[SOFT LAUGHTER]
233
00:08:29,925 --> 00:08:31,960
So, really, I'm happy for Sam.
234
00:08:31,993 --> 00:08:33,828
She truly is a sweet girl.
235
00:08:33,862 --> 00:08:35,764
Yeah, no, she's so sweet.
236
00:08:35,797 --> 00:08:37,673
She's made of sugar. Hope it doesn't rain;
237
00:08:37,698 --> 00:08:39,639
she turns into a [BLEEP] puddle!
238
00:08:40,126 --> 00:08:41,177
Timothy.
239
00:08:41,202 --> 00:08:43,004
- That mouth.
- Mm-mm-mm.
240
00:08:43,038 --> 00:08:44,839
We were having fun,
but that's carrying it
241
00:08:44,873 --> 00:08:45,840
a little too far.
242
00:08:45,874 --> 00:08:47,137
I wasn't having fun.
243
00:08:47,982 --> 00:08:49,635
Enjoy your meals all mushed together.
244
00:08:52,047 --> 00:08:54,182
Sam. Congratulations on becoming
245
00:08:54,215 --> 00:08:55,545
grill master.
246
00:08:55,545 --> 00:08:56,985
Go ahead with your insult, Chrissy.
247
00:08:57,018 --> 00:08:59,054
- I don't have an insult.
- Why? Too dumb?
248
00:08:59,087 --> 00:09:00,889
- I'm just surprised.
- Damn it.
249
00:09:00,922 --> 00:09:02,624
You're brave enough to
take on this responsibility
250
00:09:02,657 --> 00:09:04,659
after you quit Dad's restaurant.
251
00:09:04,693 --> 00:09:06,673
I was 15.
252
00:09:06,717 --> 00:09:08,419
Nobody even cares about that anymore.
253
00:09:08,452 --> 00:09:09,643
Daddy cares.
254
00:09:09,643 --> 00:09:11,423
You quit the waffle
station right in the middle
255
00:09:11,455 --> 00:09:12,657
of Mothers' Day brunch.
256
00:09:12,690 --> 00:09:15,245
People just pouring syrup on waffle batter.
257
00:09:15,426 --> 00:09:17,799
- So sad.
- Dog food over there, Chrissy.
258
00:09:17,799 --> 00:09:19,067
Why don't you go eat up? Hey!
259
00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:20,435
Hurry it up up there!
260
00:09:20,469 --> 00:09:22,371
Whoo, you call this well-done?
261
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:24,321
I took a bite out of it; it said,
262
00:09:24,355 --> 00:09:25,828
"Ouch, you hurting me!"
263
00:09:25,828 --> 00:09:27,107
[LAUGHING]
264
00:09:27,804 --> 00:09:30,618
She said it talked! [LAUGHS]
265
00:09:32,512 --> 00:09:34,083
Hey! Hey, you kids!
266
00:09:34,304 --> 00:09:36,039
Don't go wandering off in them woods.
267
00:09:36,479 --> 00:09:38,110
Might mess around and get snatched up
268
00:09:38,110 --> 00:09:39,170
by the Fork Bandit!
269
00:09:39,468 --> 00:09:41,450
Y'all don't know who the Fork Bandit is?
270
00:09:41,925 --> 00:09:43,612
They don't know who the Fork Bandit is.
271
00:09:43,723 --> 00:09:45,897
He was a kid, just like you.
272
00:09:46,126 --> 00:09:48,069
He wandered off from a barbecue,
273
00:09:48,295 --> 00:09:49,772
couldn't find his family,
274
00:09:49,772 --> 00:09:53,642
and now he's a dusty crackhead
with nothing but a fork!
275
00:09:53,676 --> 00:09:55,558
Anytime today, Sam.
276
00:09:56,035 --> 00:09:58,080
It's gonna be just a slight delay.
277
00:09:58,114 --> 00:09:59,648
Sam gotta speed up.
278
00:09:59,682 --> 00:10:01,784
This long line's driving me to drink.
279
00:10:02,157 --> 00:10:03,363
Driving me to drink.
280
00:10:03,388 --> 00:10:04,739
Hey, come on, now. Look here.
281
00:10:04,739 --> 00:10:06,741
This is a brand-new grill master.
282
00:10:07,096 --> 00:10:08,856
We gotta give him a chance to find his way.
283
00:10:08,856 --> 00:10:09,957
Flip six, son.
284
00:10:09,990 --> 00:10:11,826
- Uh, yeah.
- In a little while,
285
00:10:11,859 --> 00:10:13,294
he's gonna be out-grilling us all,
286
00:10:13,327 --> 00:10:14,662
providing he don't quit. [LAUGHS]
287
00:10:14,695 --> 00:10:16,526
I'm not going to quit, Dad.
288
00:10:16,551 --> 00:10:19,554
You're not again, because
now you are a grown man,
289
00:10:19,672 --> 00:10:22,639
and this is a responsibility. [CHUCKLES]
290
00:10:23,793 --> 00:10:26,762
Son, get rid of eight and nine.
291
00:10:26,796 --> 00:10:27,941
They done.
292
00:10:28,692 --> 00:10:31,862
- Hey, grill master.
- Hey, baby.
293
00:10:31,895 --> 00:10:34,164
Mwah. Babe, look at us.
294
00:10:34,197 --> 00:10:36,520
I mean, me impressing your family,
295
00:10:36,567 --> 00:10:38,268
you're grill master.
296
00:10:38,587 --> 00:10:40,070
We're the hits of this party, babe.
297
00:10:40,368 --> 00:10:42,705
Yep, everybody loves us and
is happy with our performance.
298
00:10:42,739 --> 00:10:44,908
That they are, and that they do.
299
00:10:45,181 --> 00:10:46,616
- Give it to me.
- BOTH: Mwah.
300
00:10:47,073 --> 00:10:49,000
Hey, Shannon. Can I get a picture?
301
00:10:49,419 --> 00:10:50,875
I have something better for you.
302
00:10:52,088 --> 00:10:54,391
? Leave a message ?
303
00:10:54,424 --> 00:10:55,585
? God is good ?
304
00:10:55,585 --> 00:10:57,153
Whoo! [LAUGHS]
305
00:10:57,687 --> 00:10:58,908
For when they call.
306
00:10:58,908 --> 00:10:59,876
Hey, guys!
307
00:11:00,268 --> 00:11:01,917
There's paper bowls here.
308
00:11:01,917 --> 00:11:03,204
New this year.
309
00:11:03,238 --> 00:11:05,046
Good for dip, sides, whatever.
310
00:11:05,071 --> 00:11:07,154
Look kind of fun. Try 'em out.
311
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,445
No bowl, sweetie?
312
00:11:10,478 --> 00:11:11,840
No bowls.
313
00:11:12,281 --> 00:11:15,503
- Who's this?
- My friend from school, Evan.
314
00:11:15,985 --> 00:11:17,962
- How you doing, Evan?
- Tim Cramblin. Cramblin Advertising.
315
00:11:17,962 --> 00:11:19,797
- You want to hear a joke?
- No, I don't.
316
00:11:20,454 --> 00:11:22,774
I just don't think a little kid's joke
317
00:11:22,774 --> 00:11:24,743
is ever going to make
me, an adult man, laugh.
318
00:11:25,459 --> 00:11:28,046
Thanks, though. Just don't
have the life experience.
319
00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:29,639
- Thank you.
- Hey, Uncle Tim?
320
00:11:29,717 --> 00:11:31,016
Yes, sweetie?
321
00:11:31,049 --> 00:11:32,497
Sometimes I think things
322
00:11:32,522 --> 00:11:34,091
but I don't say them out loud,
323
00:11:34,124 --> 00:11:35,425
'cause then people hear them
324
00:11:35,459 --> 00:11:36,860
and they might hurt their feelings.
325
00:11:36,893 --> 00:11:40,597
?
326
00:11:40,991 --> 00:11:42,156
Oh, my God.
327
00:11:43,248 --> 00:11:44,636
I am harsh.
328
00:11:45,738 --> 00:11:46,978
I'm harsh!
329
00:11:47,641 --> 00:11:48,625
Thank you.
330
00:11:50,187 --> 00:11:52,042
Ooh. [LAUGHS]
331
00:11:55,742 --> 00:11:56,980
It's okay, son. I got this.
332
00:11:57,014 --> 00:11:58,082
Don't worry about a thing.
333
00:11:58,415 --> 00:11:59,930
Ah, Sam.
334
00:12:04,277 --> 00:12:05,522
You got divorced.
335
00:12:05,555 --> 00:12:07,157
You're not in the family anymore.
336
00:12:07,190 --> 00:12:08,598
You got to give up that shirt.
337
00:12:08,623 --> 00:12:09,621
Chrissy.
338
00:12:10,527 --> 00:12:13,030
I am so sorry I called
your family pig-faced liars.
339
00:12:13,063 --> 00:12:14,979
Mm, thank you, baby.
340
00:12:14,979 --> 00:12:17,015
And I'm sorry I said
[BLEEP] in front of your mom.
341
00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:18,849
- You did?
- Yeah.
342
00:12:19,128 --> 00:12:20,806
And Aunt Lacey and Old Shirley.
343
00:12:21,691 --> 00:12:23,326
But I'm not that person anymore.
344
00:12:23,855 --> 00:12:25,141
I am harsh.
345
00:12:25,819 --> 00:12:27,374
I realize that now.
346
00:12:27,374 --> 00:12:30,507
It took a weird little kid with
a shitty joke I never heard,
347
00:12:30,532 --> 00:12:32,011
but I'm gonna be a better man.
348
00:12:32,621 --> 00:12:33,687
I love you so much.
349
00:12:33,687 --> 00:12:35,990
- Mm.
- I love you too, baby.
350
00:12:38,092 --> 00:12:40,326
Hey, girl! I like that hat.
351
00:12:41,522 --> 00:12:43,157
Have fun, everybody.
352
00:12:43,190 --> 00:12:44,451
Oh, and Sam?
353
00:12:44,758 --> 00:12:46,560
Take it easy on your daddy.
354
00:12:46,593 --> 00:12:48,662
I need him in tip-top shape today.
355
00:12:48,695 --> 00:12:50,965
Oh! Gross! Mom!
356
00:12:50,966 --> 00:12:52,766
Hey, be happy for me.
357
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:54,343
I'm gonna let you take it out first.
358
00:12:54,568 --> 00:12:56,608
'Cause you're gonna need
all the help you can get.
359
00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,129
Let's ball.
360
00:12:59,606 --> 00:13:00,741
What you got, Sam?
361
00:13:00,774 --> 00:13:01,937
What you got, bro?
362
00:13:01,962 --> 00:13:04,331
What you got? What you got? What you got?
363
00:13:04,908 --> 00:13:05,848
Money!
364
00:13:06,948 --> 00:13:09,106
- David!
- [LAUGHTER]
365
00:13:11,323 --> 00:13:12,484
Look here, Sam. Now, look.
366
00:13:12,484 --> 00:13:14,054
When you're guarding somebody,
you got to bend your knees
367
00:13:14,088 --> 00:13:15,203
and put your hands in the air.
368
00:13:15,203 --> 00:13:16,938
I know how to play defense, Dad.
369
00:13:16,971 --> 00:13:18,918
Really? Then how come you
let me bust this in your face?
370
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:21,310
- Whoo!
- Yes!
371
00:13:26,178 --> 00:13:27,974
- Sam, bounce pass.
- Coming your way, baby.
372
00:13:28,028 --> 00:13:29,250
You don't call the kind
of pass you're gonna do
373
00:13:29,284 --> 00:13:30,310
before you do it.
374
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:31,477
I'm just having fun
playing with you, buddy.
375
00:13:32,034 --> 00:13:34,136
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
376
00:13:34,237 --> 00:13:35,281
Ball game!
377
00:13:36,675 --> 00:13:37,743
David!
378
00:13:38,039 --> 00:13:39,295
Kick it! Kick it!
379
00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:40,420
Kick it!
380
00:13:40,453 --> 00:13:42,773
Wait a minute. Reset, reset, reset!
381
00:13:42,839 --> 00:13:44,073
I wasn't ready. Come on.
382
00:13:44,107 --> 00:13:45,475
Kick it! Kick it! Kick it!
383
00:13:51,481 --> 00:13:53,120
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
384
00:13:54,784 --> 00:13:57,060
Pass it, Sam. It's out or your range.
385
00:13:57,060 --> 00:13:59,061
No, it's not. Here comes fade away.
386
00:13:59,086 --> 00:14:00,110
Short.
387
00:14:04,091 --> 00:14:06,460
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
388
00:14:08,476 --> 00:14:10,678
Why don't you quit while you're behind?
389
00:14:10,711 --> 00:14:12,679
I know you know a little
thing about quitting.
390
00:14:13,465 --> 00:14:16,335
I gave this boy a job, and then
you know what he did, George?
391
00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:17,485
Don't tell me he quit.
392
00:14:17,518 --> 00:14:19,353
On Mothers' Day brunch!
393
00:14:19,682 --> 00:14:21,123
That was 15 years ago.
394
00:14:21,123 --> 00:14:22,724
Oh, look ya. You're hot and bothered.
395
00:14:22,758 --> 00:14:24,783
- Just talking trash, baby.
- Don't listen to him, Sam.
396
00:14:24,808 --> 00:14:26,744
- Dunk on him!
- I can't dunk.
397
00:14:26,777 --> 00:14:28,189
Can't grill neither.
398
00:14:28,189 --> 00:14:29,480
Why don't have another
handle of whiskey,
399
00:14:29,513 --> 00:14:30,481
you drunk old bitch?
400
00:14:30,514 --> 00:14:31,637
Whoa.
401
00:14:32,269 --> 00:14:33,717
Hey, Samuel.
402
00:14:34,042 --> 00:14:35,349
An insult is just...
403
00:14:35,349 --> 00:14:36,851
"Is just a." You know what?
404
00:14:36,885 --> 00:14:38,356
I don't care. I friggin' quit.
405
00:14:38,921 --> 00:14:40,956
- Oh, damn.
- Damn.
406
00:14:43,452 --> 00:14:45,371
Whoa. What the...
407
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:47,505
That was a little harsh.
408
00:14:47,505 --> 00:14:48,891
And I know, because I
used to be harsh myself.
409
00:14:48,916 --> 00:14:50,106
But I'm not anymore.
410
00:14:50,762 --> 00:14:52,309
I'll go talk to him, gang.
411
00:14:52,735 --> 00:14:53,905
Good game, everybody.
412
00:14:54,427 --> 00:14:55,465
That's fun.
413
00:14:57,330 --> 00:15:01,602
?
414
00:15:01,602 --> 00:15:02,595
Hey, buddy.
415
00:15:02,805 --> 00:15:04,618
I wanna let you know
we're forfeiting the game.
416
00:15:05,473 --> 00:15:06,827
We lost 'cause you kicked the ball.
417
00:15:06,852 --> 00:15:07,782
Yeah.
418
00:15:08,476 --> 00:15:10,044
Your dad was being an asshole.
419
00:15:10,078 --> 00:15:12,816
I know, like, he can't just
ever let anything just be.
420
00:15:12,816 --> 00:15:14,682
He never just, like, let me do my thing.
421
00:15:15,047 --> 00:15:17,616
Like, uh... I mean, I own
my own frickin' company.
422
00:15:17,649 --> 00:15:19,163
No, we both own it.
423
00:15:19,163 --> 00:15:21,231
Yeah, Tim, I mean, but
for my point, can you just...
424
00:15:21,265 --> 00:15:23,000
- Yeah, no, just... both own it.
- Yeah, we both own it.
425
00:15:23,371 --> 00:15:24,539
- I know.
- Thank you.
426
00:15:24,572 --> 00:15:25,473
I mean, like, 15 years ago, you know,
427
00:15:25,507 --> 00:15:26,741
I'm behind the waffle iron,
428
00:15:26,774 --> 00:15:28,676
and, like, he's just,
like, right behind me,
429
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:30,445
like, "Waffle's overcooked, Sam."
430
00:15:30,478 --> 00:15:31,679
Waffle's overcooked, Sam."
431
00:15:31,713 --> 00:15:33,328
I mean, I just can't focus.
432
00:15:33,353 --> 00:15:35,255
So I finally am just like, you
know, I walked out of there.
433
00:15:35,264 --> 00:15:36,965
I just, like, left, and
then, like, before I left,
434
00:15:36,999 --> 00:15:38,333
like, I turned my back
and, like, I looked back,
435
00:15:38,367 --> 00:15:41,375
I was like, "Happy
Mothers' Day, you mothers."
436
00:15:42,212 --> 00:15:43,438
Did you really say that?
437
00:15:43,917 --> 00:15:45,204
I wish I did so much.
438
00:15:45,906 --> 00:15:47,575
I think your dad's just hard on you,
439
00:15:47,600 --> 00:15:49,345
because he knows you can do anything.
440
00:15:51,814 --> 00:15:52,881
Anything.
441
00:15:52,915 --> 00:15:53,982
I can't dunk, Tim.
442
00:15:54,016 --> 00:15:55,450
I think you can, Sam.
443
00:15:55,484 --> 00:16:00,022
? If you're going to love me ?
444
00:16:00,559 --> 00:16:02,867
- Dad.
- Samuel.
445
00:16:03,859 --> 00:16:05,638
Sorry I kicked the basketball.
446
00:16:06,001 --> 00:16:07,569
Ah, it's okay. [CHUCKLES]
447
00:16:07,938 --> 00:16:09,940
It's just that Duvet family passion.
448
00:16:10,175 --> 00:16:12,043
Makes for us to be great lovers.
449
00:16:12,076 --> 00:16:13,220
I know.
450
00:16:13,429 --> 00:16:14,478
You know, son,
451
00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:16,599
when I give you advice...
452
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:18,167
Or anybody for that matter...
453
00:16:18,903 --> 00:16:20,870
It's just because I know how to do things,
454
00:16:21,084 --> 00:16:22,147
the best.
455
00:16:22,939 --> 00:16:24,807
Yeah, Dad, just
everything doesn't have to be
456
00:16:24,841 --> 00:16:25,949
a teachable moment.
457
00:16:25,949 --> 00:16:27,243
You know, you really
shouldn't have called
458
00:16:27,277 --> 00:16:29,579
your uncle George an old drunk bitch.
459
00:16:29,612 --> 00:16:30,782
No, I know that.
460
00:16:31,547 --> 00:16:32,902
You know, I know a lot of things.
461
00:16:32,902 --> 00:16:35,271
In fact, some things you didn't
teach me, believe it or not.
462
00:16:35,304 --> 00:16:37,449
Yeah, well, whether I
taught you or not, I know 'em.
463
00:16:37,490 --> 00:16:38,658
That's not the point.
464
00:16:38,691 --> 00:16:39,892
Test me, if you don't believe me.
465
00:16:39,925 --> 00:16:41,293
- I bet I know it.
- Dad.
466
00:16:41,327 --> 00:16:42,395
- Go ahead, test me.
- I bet you I know it.
467
00:16:42,428 --> 00:16:43,675
- Dad.
- [LAUGHS]
468
00:16:44,143 --> 00:16:47,448
You know, son, you're gonna
be a great grill master.
469
00:16:49,749 --> 00:16:52,282
- I know I am.
- Just not this year.
470
00:16:52,352 --> 00:16:53,718
Yeah, I know, that's fair.
471
00:16:54,759 --> 00:16:55,888
[MEAT SIZZLING]
472
00:16:56,547 --> 00:16:57,584
Tim.
473
00:16:58,090 --> 00:17:00,059
Hey, so...
474
00:17:00,489 --> 00:17:03,392
I know we didn't get a lot
of time to talk earlier,
475
00:17:03,426 --> 00:17:06,426
and I hate how we got
off on the wrong foot,
476
00:17:06,970 --> 00:17:09,698
but are you talking shit behind my back?
477
00:17:09,732 --> 00:17:10,732
No.
478
00:17:11,315 --> 00:17:12,706
Why, who said that?
479
00:17:13,842 --> 00:17:15,010
Was it Aunt Lacey?
480
00:17:17,616 --> 00:17:20,883
I may have said that a fly
landed on your potato salad
481
00:17:20,916 --> 00:17:23,966
and the fly complained it was bland.
482
00:17:23,966 --> 00:17:26,091
Then he flew away, got some salt,
483
00:17:26,091 --> 00:17:27,772
used the salt on the potato salad,
484
00:17:27,773 --> 00:17:29,070
so it tasted good to him.
485
00:17:29,941 --> 00:17:31,476
But I now realize that...
486
00:17:32,208 --> 00:17:35,346
although the joke was very
clever, it was also harsh.
487
00:17:35,379 --> 00:17:36,324
Yeah.
488
00:17:36,324 --> 00:17:39,634
And I want to start fresh. I'm sorry.
489
00:17:42,071 --> 00:17:44,773
I'm sorry Sam didn't
introduce me to you sooner.
490
00:17:45,079 --> 00:17:48,249
I guess he knew how intimidated
I would be to meet you
491
00:17:48,283 --> 00:17:50,947
because you're so important
to him, so it's cool.
492
00:17:51,119 --> 00:17:53,154
Sweet of you to say, but
I'm pretty sure it's 'cause
493
00:17:53,188 --> 00:17:55,193
he knew I was gonna be
a big, giant asshole.
494
00:17:55,218 --> 00:17:57,687
[LAUGHS] You're probably right.
495
00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:58,975
Yes, I am right.
496
00:18:00,995 --> 00:18:02,063
- Friends?
- Yeah.
497
00:18:02,096 --> 00:18:03,576
- All right.
- [CHUCKLES]
498
00:18:03,810 --> 00:18:06,434
Whoo! I'm doing work out there.
499
00:18:06,434 --> 00:18:09,941
Hey! Now, that's a
Duvet filet right there.
500
00:18:10,049 --> 00:18:11,316
It's all yours, Dad.
501
00:18:11,851 --> 00:18:13,153
[EAGLE SCREECHING]
502
00:18:13,186 --> 00:18:16,289
[DRAMATIC PERCUSSION]
503
00:18:16,322 --> 00:18:23,563
?
504
00:18:24,232 --> 00:18:27,736
[IN SLOW-MOTION] Fork Bandit!
505
00:18:27,831 --> 00:18:29,399
?
506
00:18:29,424 --> 00:18:31,092
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
507
00:18:31,117 --> 00:18:33,908
- Hey!
- That crackhead stole my filet!
508
00:18:33,908 --> 00:18:36,144
I'll be god-damned.
509
00:18:36,377 --> 00:18:38,142
I thought I made that shit up.
510
00:18:39,102 --> 00:18:40,314
Whoopsie-daisy.
511
00:18:40,645 --> 00:18:42,865
That ain't apple juice;
that's Hennessy right there.
512
00:18:43,498 --> 00:18:44,800
Taste pretty good though.
513
00:18:44,949 --> 00:18:46,979
- You see that?
- You see his abs?
514
00:18:47,010 --> 00:18:48,754
Yeah, I mean, you only get
abs like that if you do crack.
515
00:18:48,754 --> 00:18:50,044
Yeah, 'cause you're always running,
516
00:18:50,044 --> 00:18:51,021
trying to get the crack.
517
00:18:51,021 --> 00:18:52,122
Yep, running, jumping,
swimming, climbing.
518
00:18:52,155 --> 00:18:53,290
I mean, it's all cardio.
519
00:18:53,323 --> 00:18:55,378
- Yeah, 'cause you gotta get the crack.
- It's the whole goal.
520
00:18:55,378 --> 00:18:56,856
- It's their brass ring, baby.
- It's the main thing.
521
00:18:56,856 --> 00:18:57,991
- It's crack.
- BOTH: It's crack.
522
00:18:58,024 --> 00:18:59,225
We're all thinking the same thing.
523
00:18:59,259 --> 00:19:00,326
In a way it's admirable,
you know what I mean?
524
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:01,675
- Sure.
- It's like dedication
525
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:03,235
- to one thing.
- Sure, man.
526
00:19:03,260 --> 00:19:04,628
You look good too.
527
00:19:04,653 --> 00:19:06,355
You look good. Name me one fat crackhead.
528
00:19:06,388 --> 00:19:08,323
- Lou Dobbs.
- Yeah, that's one.
529
00:19:08,357 --> 00:19:10,056
- Lou Dobbs is a fat crackhead.
- That's the one.
530
00:19:10,451 --> 00:19:12,670
I want to thank y'all for coming
531
00:19:12,695 --> 00:19:14,930
to another good Duvet family reunion!
532
00:19:14,963 --> 00:19:16,373
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
533
00:19:16,373 --> 00:19:18,950
And I want to take this time
to acknowledge my son, Samuel,
534
00:19:19,382 --> 00:19:21,586
in his inaugural shift as the
535
00:19:21,611 --> 00:19:23,486
new Duvet grill master!
536
00:19:23,519 --> 00:19:25,555
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
537
00:19:25,588 --> 00:19:27,723
It is a job that I am confident
538
00:19:27,757 --> 00:19:29,250
that he will grow into.
539
00:19:29,592 --> 00:19:32,303
And, son, I just want you to know...
540
00:19:34,464 --> 00:19:35,540
I'm proud of you.
541
00:19:36,669 --> 00:19:37,955
And the man you've become.
542
00:19:38,868 --> 00:19:40,148
I am too.
543
00:19:40,803 --> 00:19:41,938
Proud of you.
544
00:19:41,971 --> 00:19:43,362
And the man you've become.
545
00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:45,107
Same as your dad.
546
00:19:46,976 --> 00:19:48,911
- Yeah.
- ? For ?
547
00:19:48,945 --> 00:19:50,705
? He's a jolly good fellow ?
548
00:19:50,985 --> 00:19:52,854
? For he's a jolly good fellow ?
549
00:19:52,988 --> 00:19:57,192
? For he's a jolly good fellow ?
550
00:19:57,225 --> 00:20:00,195
? Which nobody can deny ?
551
00:20:00,228 --> 00:20:01,663
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
552
00:20:01,663 --> 00:20:02,747
The best.
553
00:20:03,047 --> 00:20:06,053
? More than you ?
554
00:20:06,835 --> 00:20:08,235
? It is ?
555
00:20:08,459 --> 00:20:11,762
? More than me ?
556
00:20:12,515 --> 00:20:13,661
Whoa.
557
00:20:13,764 --> 00:20:18,969
? We are family, like a giant tree ?
558
00:20:19,003 --> 00:20:20,571
I'm not harsh anymore,
559
00:20:20,604 --> 00:20:22,973
but getting up there and
signing, that's a nuts move.
560
00:20:23,007 --> 00:20:24,542
? We are family ?
561
00:20:24,575 --> 00:20:27,878
? We are so much more ?
562
00:20:27,912 --> 00:20:30,981
? Than just you and I ?
563
00:20:31,015 --> 00:20:33,050
ALL: ? We are a family ?
564
00:20:33,084 --> 00:20:35,686
? Like a giant tree ?
565
00:20:35,719 --> 00:20:40,491
? Growing stronger, growing wiser ?
566
00:20:40,524 --> 00:20:47,498
ALL: ? We are a family ?
567
00:20:47,531 --> 00:20:50,468
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
568
00:20:50,501 --> 00:20:51,669
Whoo!
569
00:20:51,702 --> 00:20:53,437
There's only one thing left to say:
570
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:55,406
Let's hustle!
571
00:20:55,439 --> 00:20:57,641
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
572
00:21:01,018 --> 00:21:01,994
Money!
573
00:21:01,995 --> 00:21:02,962
Ah! Cash!
574
00:21:03,492 --> 00:21:04,618
Marked price!
575
00:21:05,141 --> 00:21:06,733
Cash! Money!
576
00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:09,382
Microwave! Cash!
577
00:21:09,998 --> 00:21:11,165
Three! Money!
578
00:21:11,199 --> 00:21:12,433
David!
579
00:21:12,467 --> 00:21:13,768
Ball game!
580
00:21:13,818 --> 00:21:18,368
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