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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,548 --> 00:00:03,341 Hey, there's a guy who looks like he's ready 2 00:00:03,342 --> 00:00:06,891 to take the world by the balls and never stop squeezing. 3 00:00:06,892 --> 00:00:08,871 - Oh, that's it? - That's it. 4 00:00:08,872 --> 00:00:11,051 - How nice and simple. - Here, eat this. 5 00:00:11,052 --> 00:00:12,741 - This for me? - Yeah, breakfast burrito! 6 00:00:12,742 --> 00:00:14,256 I can't have my business partner pounding the pavement 7 00:00:14,256 --> 00:00:16,286 - on an empty stomach. - Oh, my God! 8 00:00:19,195 --> 00:00:22,294 Fuck, come on, man. Smaller bites, smaller bites! 9 00:00:22,948 --> 00:00:26,265 Yeah, or maybe make a tighter burrito...? 10 00:00:26,265 --> 00:00:27,425 Really? 11 00:00:30,425 --> 00:00:33,274 - Was that our first fight? - Yeah, I think so. 12 00:00:33,275 --> 00:00:35,334 [chuckles] Well done. 13 00:00:35,335 --> 00:00:37,334 - You, too. - Let me get that for ya. 14 00:00:37,335 --> 00:00:39,355 [whirring] 15 00:00:41,285 --> 00:00:42,994 That's working like a charm. 16 00:00:43,019 --> 00:00:45,018 - Aw! - Oh, man! 17 00:00:45,258 --> 00:00:46,813 That was my best vacuum. 18 00:00:46,846 --> 00:00:48,865 Damn it, that was my only tie. 19 00:00:48,962 --> 00:00:51,087 Well, it was your tie, but all right. 20 00:00:51,088 --> 00:00:52,392 Well, I better take my leave. 21 00:00:52,392 --> 00:00:53,395 Don't wanna be late on my first day, 22 00:00:53,395 --> 00:00:54,942 - right, business partner? - You're right. 23 00:00:54,943 --> 00:00:56,664 - Here, don't forget this. - No, no, no. 24 00:00:56,665 --> 00:00:58,043 I'm not really a coffee guy. Makes me shit. 25 00:00:58,068 --> 00:00:59,609 Neither am I. 26 00:01:01,689 --> 00:01:04,608 - Fuck, what? - Thermos bong. 27 00:01:04,609 --> 00:01:06,110 - What do you think? - I think 28 00:01:06,111 --> 00:01:08,492 you're the best business decision I ever made. 29 00:01:09,121 --> 00:01:10,290 Time for a quick rip? 30 00:01:10,291 --> 00:01:12,054 It's 8:00 in the morning. 31 00:01:12,055 --> 00:01:13,914 - Yeah, right. - I'm just kidding! 32 00:01:13,915 --> 00:01:15,389 Oh, fuck, you got me, man! 33 00:01:15,414 --> 00:01:17,885 34 00:01:18,816 --> 00:01:22,752 - Synced and corrected by hawken45 - - www.addic7ed.com - 35 00:01:46,995 --> 00:01:48,974 36 00:01:48,975 --> 00:01:50,495 Kevin Pavarotti? 37 00:01:50,495 --> 00:01:51,714 Uh, yeah. Close enough. 38 00:01:52,064 --> 00:01:54,684 Hi, I'm Spencer. I manage the store. 39 00:01:54,686 --> 00:01:56,175 What? "The" Spencer? 40 00:01:56,176 --> 00:01:58,520 No. It's just a fortunate coincidence. 41 00:01:58,545 --> 00:01:59,604 I'll say. 42 00:01:59,825 --> 00:02:01,115 Uh, let me show you the problem. 43 00:02:01,116 --> 00:02:02,185 So, when I go to close up for the night, 44 00:02:02,186 --> 00:02:05,448 these lights just won't shut off. 45 00:02:05,916 --> 00:02:08,274 - Mm-hmm. - Our electric bill is insane. 46 00:02:08,275 --> 00:02:09,576 I bet. Okay. 47 00:02:09,601 --> 00:02:11,710 Well... shit. Well, sir, 48 00:02:12,284 --> 00:02:15,600 I am a true professional and I will not rest 49 00:02:15,601 --> 00:02:16,700 until I solve your ghost case. 50 00:02:16,701 --> 00:02:20,671 Oh, my God. 51 00:02:22,501 --> 00:02:24,530 Oh, Pac, you have made it. 52 00:02:24,531 --> 00:02:25,680 [chuckles] 53 00:02:26,344 --> 00:02:29,035 Lap of luxur... shit. 54 00:02:29,956 --> 00:02:31,491 Hey. Hey, hey, hey. 55 00:02:31,491 --> 00:02:33,500 - No, no, shh. - Hey, I was enjoying that! 56 00:02:33,501 --> 00:02:35,720 No, shh, no, no, no, man. The show is on. 57 00:02:35,721 --> 00:02:37,606 You're talking about that? 58 00:02:37,607 --> 00:02:39,626 That is not a show. That's a lamp, okay? 59 00:02:39,651 --> 00:02:41,590 Shows have things like characters and storylines 60 00:02:41,591 --> 00:02:43,560 and... oh, shit. 61 00:02:43,561 --> 00:02:46,490 That one just split into two. Look at the little baby. 62 00:02:46,491 --> 00:02:47,680 I hope the baby's okay. 63 00:02:47,681 --> 00:02:50,500 All right. I get it. 64 00:02:50,501 --> 00:02:51,620 That's a good show. 65 00:02:51,621 --> 00:02:54,540 But, unfortunately, 66 00:02:54,541 --> 00:02:56,600 the show's been cancelled. 67 00:02:56,601 --> 00:02:59,570 Oh, boo, man! Not cool! 68 00:02:59,571 --> 00:03:02,710 - Who are you? - I am Pac. 69 00:03:03,123 --> 00:03:05,062 - Well, I'm Weasel. - Well, Weasel, 70 00:03:05,087 --> 00:03:07,550 I am a medium and I'm here to help you. 71 00:03:07,551 --> 00:03:09,690 - You can see ghosts? - I can. 72 00:03:09,691 --> 00:03:13,540 - Prove it. - Like, by talking to you? 73 00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:15,500 Yeah. 74 00:03:15,501 --> 00:03:17,510 - Oh. [laughs] - Yeah, you got there. 75 00:03:17,511 --> 00:03:18,414 - Nice. - Okay, 76 00:03:18,415 --> 00:03:20,060 tell me why you're still sticking around. 77 00:03:20,085 --> 00:03:21,475 I don't really remember, man. 78 00:03:21,476 --> 00:03:23,385 Okay. 79 00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:24,849 All right, then. Fair enough. 80 00:03:24,850 --> 00:03:26,849 What is the last thing you remember? 81 00:03:26,850 --> 00:03:30,390 - I was going somewhere. - Okay. 82 00:03:31,136 --> 00:03:32,819 - Any idea? - Oh! Uh, Taco's! 83 00:03:32,820 --> 00:03:34,525 Going to get some tacos. 84 00:03:34,526 --> 00:03:36,615 No, no, no. I was going to my buddy Taco's. 85 00:03:37,542 --> 00:03:39,069 - You were going to your buddy. - Yeah. 86 00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:40,442 - He is named Taco. - Yeah! 87 00:03:40,443 --> 00:03:41,612 - Got it. - Oh, wait. But, no. Hold on. 88 00:03:41,637 --> 00:03:44,476 He wasn't home. I was, like, really fucking hungry. 89 00:03:44,477 --> 00:03:46,439 So I decided to go get some tacos. 90 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:48,125 You're going to go eat some tacos. Okay. 91 00:03:48,126 --> 00:03:49,610 Now I'm totally on board. Got it. 92 00:03:49,610 --> 00:03:52,529 But the taco place was closed. 93 00:03:53,393 --> 00:03:56,469 So I decided to go get Mushu instead. 94 00:03:56,469 --> 00:03:58,820 Mushu. Excellent choice. You were still hungry, 95 00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:00,420 - after all. - No, no, no, dude. 96 00:04:00,420 --> 00:04:03,245 - Mushu is my girlfriend. - What the fuck, man? 97 00:04:03,246 --> 00:04:05,504 She owed me money and I decided to collect 98 00:04:05,505 --> 00:04:07,493 so I could go get some... 99 00:04:07,494 --> 00:04:08,653 - Tacos? - Ice cream. 100 00:04:09,099 --> 00:04:11,108 No, man. The taco place was closed. 101 00:04:11,109 --> 00:04:13,119 You're not listening? 102 00:04:15,079 --> 00:04:18,019 You're a bad medium. You're not listening to me. 103 00:04:21,019 --> 00:04:22,998 And that's when I settled on Thai food. 104 00:04:22,999 --> 00:04:24,108 Okay, Weasel. 105 00:04:24,109 --> 00:04:27,018 What happened... 106 00:04:27,019 --> 00:04:28,860 after you ate? 107 00:04:28,860 --> 00:04:30,899 Oh, I had to fuel up for the thing. 108 00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:34,769 - What thing? - It's the Bong Pong-a-thon, man! 109 00:04:34,770 --> 00:04:36,908 It's, like, the biggest bong pong tournament 110 00:04:36,909 --> 00:04:38,603 - in the Tri-state area. - Okay, 111 00:04:38,604 --> 00:04:39,633 now we're getting somewhere. 112 00:04:39,635 --> 00:04:41,654 What exactly is bong pong? 113 00:04:41,655 --> 00:04:44,600 It's like beer pong with a twist to it. 114 00:04:45,575 --> 00:04:48,594 Is the twist that you smoke bongs instead of drinking beer? 115 00:04:48,595 --> 00:04:49,714 The greatest game ever. 116 00:04:49,715 --> 00:04:51,564 Did you ever make it to that tournament? 117 00:04:51,565 --> 00:04:53,584 - No, man. - No. 118 00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:55,554 I got hit by a retard bus. 119 00:04:55,555 --> 00:04:56,654 Oops. 120 00:04:56,655 --> 00:04:58,624 I left my partner high 121 00:04:58,625 --> 00:05:00,604 and high. 122 00:05:00,605 --> 00:05:03,614 - Never won the championship. - Okay, well, bingo. 123 00:05:03,615 --> 00:05:05,282 That's it. That's your unfinished business. 124 00:05:05,282 --> 00:05:07,704 We gotta find your partner and win that tournament. 125 00:05:07,705 --> 00:05:09,604 Far out, man! 126 00:05:09,605 --> 00:05:11,574 All right, let's get this show back on. 127 00:05:11,575 --> 00:05:13,644 Hey, who the fuck are you again? 128 00:05:13,930 --> 00:05:15,210 Doesn't matter. 129 00:05:15,241 --> 00:05:18,735 130 00:05:24,575 --> 00:05:25,754 It's busted. 131 00:05:25,755 --> 00:05:28,705 [saw whirring] 132 00:05:35,565 --> 00:05:37,213 Wait till you meet Nugget, man. 133 00:05:37,238 --> 00:05:39,211 He's, like, the chillest dude ever. 134 00:05:39,236 --> 00:05:40,654 Awesome. I love chill dudes. 135 00:05:40,655 --> 00:05:42,670 Ahem. 136 00:05:43,048 --> 00:05:46,724 I believe I may be looking for your son, Nugget? 137 00:05:47,731 --> 00:05:49,574 - Nugget? - Nugget. 138 00:05:50,114 --> 00:05:52,626 No one's called me that name in 25 years. 139 00:05:52,651 --> 00:05:55,583 Nugget? Is that you, man? 140 00:05:55,973 --> 00:05:58,048 Holy shit, dude, you've aged terribly. 141 00:05:58,735 --> 00:06:01,724 Okay, well, this is gonna sound, maybe, a little bit weird, 142 00:06:01,725 --> 00:06:04,574 but I am a medium and I have been talking 143 00:06:04,575 --> 00:06:06,472 to the ghost of your old friend Weasel. 144 00:06:06,472 --> 00:06:08,624 "Easy Weasy"? 145 00:06:08,625 --> 00:06:10,554 - He needs your help. - Of course! 146 00:06:10,555 --> 00:06:12,207 I'd do anything for that guy. 147 00:06:12,232 --> 00:06:13,966 Okay, he needs you to enter 148 00:06:13,991 --> 00:06:16,040 the annual Bong Pong-a-thon this weekend 149 00:06:16,041 --> 00:06:18,980 and he needs you to win. 150 00:06:18,981 --> 00:06:20,736 - I can't do that. - Yes, you can. 151 00:06:20,736 --> 00:06:21,999 You just need a little confidence. 152 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:24,560 I'm the Chief Resident and the Head of Neurosurgery 153 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:27,214 at the most prestigious hospital in the city. 154 00:06:27,690 --> 00:06:29,609 I can't smoke weed. 155 00:06:29,610 --> 00:06:31,629 - But we need you, Nugget. - But we need you, Nugget! 156 00:06:31,630 --> 00:06:33,749 Nugget is dead. 157 00:06:33,750 --> 00:06:36,589 - [door closes] - Whoa, man. 158 00:06:36,590 --> 00:06:38,659 Hold on. 159 00:06:38,660 --> 00:06:40,639 Nugget's dead, too? 160 00:06:42,048 --> 00:06:43,619 I feel like I just saw him, man. 161 00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:45,570 Come on, let's go. 162 00:06:47,770 --> 00:06:49,719 Whoa. 163 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:51,174 Of course I've heard of bong pong. 164 00:06:51,174 --> 00:06:52,812 It's like beer pong, but with a twist. 165 00:06:52,812 --> 00:06:54,469 Yeah, well, the bigger twist 166 00:06:54,469 --> 00:06:56,310 is that this guy's partner, Nugget, 167 00:06:56,421 --> 00:06:57,791 is a 40-year-old brain surgeon 168 00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:59,740 who doesn't smoke weed anymore. 169 00:06:59,741 --> 00:07:00,860 What are you doing? 170 00:07:01,617 --> 00:07:03,955 Well, you know how our vacuum cleans good, 171 00:07:03,955 --> 00:07:05,064 but it doesn't clean great 172 00:07:05,065 --> 00:07:06,994 and you and I have sort of been trying 173 00:07:06,995 --> 00:07:09,134 to figure out ways to make it more powerful? 174 00:07:09,135 --> 00:07:11,074 I've never once thought about the vacuum. 175 00:07:11,075 --> 00:07:13,536 There's a huge market for industrial-strength vacuums, man. 176 00:07:13,537 --> 00:07:15,161 I could knock on any door in the city and sell one. 177 00:07:15,162 --> 00:07:17,343 Clyde, I believe you and I don't care! 178 00:07:17,343 --> 00:07:19,075 I have a ghost case to solve, man! 179 00:07:19,076 --> 00:07:22,182 Why don't you just ask the ghost if you and I can enter? 180 00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:24,236 Uh, no go, bro. 181 00:07:24,261 --> 00:07:25,523 One of you can play for me, 182 00:07:25,548 --> 00:07:27,926 but the other one has to be, 183 00:07:28,026 --> 00:07:29,166 uh... uh... 184 00:07:31,126 --> 00:07:33,155 be, um, 185 00:07:33,156 --> 00:07:35,165 - we just saw him. - Nugget? 186 00:07:35,166 --> 00:07:38,045 - That's right. Nugget, man. - No go, bro. 187 00:07:38,046 --> 00:07:39,145 It's gotta be Nugget. 188 00:07:39,515 --> 00:07:42,306 - Okay. - Team Brain Damage'd has to win. 189 00:07:42,331 --> 00:07:45,261 And it's not Team Brain Damage'd without... 190 00:07:47,036 --> 00:07:48,378 Nugget! 191 00:07:48,379 --> 00:07:51,113 Nugget is a brain surgeon, right? 192 00:07:51,422 --> 00:07:53,553 Pretty smart guy. We're smart guys. 193 00:07:53,629 --> 00:07:55,648 - So... - Right. 194 00:07:56,426 --> 00:07:59,634 All we have to do is fight smart guy fire with smart guy fire. 195 00:08:00,576 --> 00:08:03,416 [siren blares] 196 00:08:06,472 --> 00:08:07,885 You again? What? 197 00:08:07,886 --> 00:08:08,817 What are you doing here? 198 00:08:08,818 --> 00:08:10,716 Yeah, hi. My brain is kind of fucked up. 199 00:08:10,718 --> 00:08:11,807 I was wondering if you could take a look at it. 200 00:08:11,808 --> 00:08:14,250 - Excuse me? - The tiger is in the barn! 201 00:08:14,282 --> 00:08:15,887 What... hey! 202 00:08:15,888 --> 00:08:17,947 Hey! Ow! Oh, stop that! 203 00:08:17,948 --> 00:08:19,757 Stop that, please! 204 00:08:19,758 --> 00:08:20,837 Hey, what the hell is going on? 205 00:08:20,838 --> 00:08:22,807 - Come on, come on! - Yes! 206 00:08:22,808 --> 00:08:24,727 - Mm! - We have pictures of you 207 00:08:24,728 --> 00:08:26,767 in a private room with a naked man. 208 00:08:26,768 --> 00:08:27,817 Looks like you're gonna be competing 209 00:08:27,818 --> 00:08:30,113 in that Bong Pong-a-thon after all. 210 00:08:30,138 --> 00:08:31,433 Guess you're not the only smart one 211 00:08:31,458 --> 00:08:33,307 in the room now, are ya, Doc? 212 00:08:33,308 --> 00:08:35,477 Your... your lens cap is on. 213 00:08:35,478 --> 00:08:37,277 - Pfft. [chuckles] - Yeah, nice try. 214 00:08:37,278 --> 00:08:37,760 - Oh, shit. - Fuck. 215 00:08:37,761 --> 00:08:39,689 I wish I could help, but I haven't played 216 00:08:39,690 --> 00:08:40,859 bong pong in forever. 217 00:08:40,860 --> 00:08:43,789 I haven't even smoked weed in, like, 25 years! 218 00:08:43,921 --> 00:08:47,860 You haven't smoked weed in 25 years? 219 00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:48,980 Okay, all right, you know what? Ahem. 220 00:08:48,981 --> 00:08:50,860 Fine, we will leave. 221 00:08:50,861 --> 00:08:52,761 Okay. 222 00:08:53,901 --> 00:08:56,760 But only after you take a hit from this joint. 223 00:08:56,761 --> 00:08:58,800 I don't know. I... I'll pass. 224 00:08:59,304 --> 00:09:00,373 You can pass, 225 00:09:00,374 --> 00:09:01,976 but you've gotta puff-puff first. 226 00:09:01,977 --> 00:09:04,049 If my wife found out I was smoking pot again, 227 00:09:04,074 --> 00:09:05,774 - she'd ground me. - [exhales] 228 00:09:05,774 --> 00:09:08,813 I mean she would leave me. She'd leave me! 229 00:09:08,814 --> 00:09:10,793 Your wife sounds like a huge cunt. 230 00:09:10,794 --> 00:09:11,913 She's very particular. 231 00:09:11,938 --> 00:09:13,868 Particularly huge cunt. 232 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:16,779 I mean... I mean, sure, sure, 233 00:09:16,804 --> 00:09:17,973 we could have sex more often 234 00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,853 than the third Thursday of every month. 235 00:09:19,854 --> 00:09:21,523 And it's true, 236 00:09:21,650 --> 00:09:23,813 it could be a position other than missionary. 237 00:09:24,308 --> 00:09:26,437 And, yeah, she decided I was vegan, 238 00:09:26,518 --> 00:09:28,903 but a quinoa steak 239 00:09:28,904 --> 00:09:31,849 is... [sighs] 240 00:09:32,814 --> 00:09:35,774 - Give me that fucking joint. - Yeah, here. 241 00:09:37,854 --> 00:09:39,813 - [sneezes] - Ugh! 242 00:09:39,814 --> 00:09:41,823 Sorry. 243 00:09:41,824 --> 00:09:42,903 The first one always makes me sneeze. 244 00:09:42,904 --> 00:09:44,774 Yeah, on my tits. 245 00:09:55,216 --> 00:09:56,315 Towel the door. 246 00:09:56,316 --> 00:09:58,346 Yes! I'll use my robe. 247 00:10:00,316 --> 00:10:02,335 Dr. Morris, dial 118. 248 00:10:03,163 --> 00:10:05,315 Nugget, now, you've been out of the game for a long time. 249 00:10:05,316 --> 00:10:06,791 Long motherfuckin' time! 250 00:10:06,792 --> 00:10:08,515 And weed has changed. 251 00:10:08,540 --> 00:10:10,958 We got a whole bunch of new strains and cross-strains 252 00:10:10,983 --> 00:10:12,132 and hybrids and... 253 00:10:12,426 --> 00:10:14,365 we wanna make sure you're prepared out there. 254 00:10:14,390 --> 00:10:16,212 - Okay. - That's why I've compiled 255 00:10:16,213 --> 00:10:19,161 every type of weed that there is. 256 00:10:19,162 --> 00:10:21,271 - And we're... - Gonna smoke the shit out of it? 257 00:10:21,272 --> 00:10:23,241 You bet we are! 258 00:10:23,242 --> 00:10:25,351 Oh, the batteries are weird. 259 00:10:25,352 --> 00:10:28,241 You gotta... you gotta get it just right. 260 00:10:28,242 --> 00:10:30,331 Montage song, kick in already! 261 00:10:30,332 --> 00:10:32,352 262 00:10:39,282 --> 00:10:41,262 Oh, that was close! 263 00:10:44,222 --> 00:10:46,231 [coughing] 264 00:10:46,232 --> 00:10:47,331 You're fucking sad, both of you. 265 00:10:47,332 --> 00:10:50,161 - Throw shorter. - [coughing] 266 00:10:50,162 --> 00:10:52,151 Oh, God. 267 00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:53,332 Throw fucking shorter. 268 00:10:56,232 --> 00:10:58,161 [coughs] 269 00:10:58,162 --> 00:10:59,261 Oh! 270 00:10:59,262 --> 00:11:02,131 - Oh! - [pager beeping] 271 00:11:02,132 --> 00:11:03,282 What? Open up. 272 00:11:05,212 --> 00:11:07,212 I'm supposed to be operating on the mayor. 273 00:11:08,362 --> 00:11:10,272 Right now. 274 00:11:17,202 --> 00:11:19,251 [coughing] 275 00:11:19,252 --> 00:11:20,361 Oh. 276 00:11:20,362 --> 00:11:22,201 But seriously, I have to go. 277 00:11:22,202 --> 00:11:25,221 [monitor beeping] 278 00:11:25,222 --> 00:11:27,182 Scalpel. 279 00:11:28,182 --> 00:11:29,332 Forceps. 280 00:11:31,202 --> 00:11:33,152 Doritos...? 281 00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:35,271 No? 282 00:11:35,272 --> 00:11:38,171 How about, uh... how about some reggae music? 283 00:11:38,172 --> 00:11:40,142 Huh, set the mood? 284 00:11:41,262 --> 00:11:44,211 All right, let's put a clamp on that. 285 00:11:44,212 --> 00:11:45,342 [monitor beeping] 286 00:11:48,192 --> 00:11:49,231 Are we still doing this? 287 00:11:49,232 --> 00:11:52,201 - Cue the music. - Sweet! 288 00:11:52,202 --> 00:11:55,142 Come on! 289 00:11:56,142 --> 00:11:57,302 290 00:12:00,162 --> 00:12:01,202 [grunting] 291 00:12:10,222 --> 00:12:12,151 Wait, how... how is this useful? 292 00:12:12,152 --> 00:12:13,301 Shh, just trust the process. 293 00:12:13,302 --> 00:12:15,231 Okay. 294 00:12:15,232 --> 00:12:18,322 295 00:12:26,292 --> 00:12:28,242 [gasps] 296 00:12:29,352 --> 00:12:32,311 Ah, yeah! 297 00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:36,271 This was such a great day! 298 00:12:36,272 --> 00:12:39,658 Oh, we are gonna crush this "tourniement" tomorrow. 299 00:12:40,627 --> 00:12:42,191 "Tourniement." 300 00:12:43,311 --> 00:12:45,131 "Tourniement," is that... is that right? 301 00:12:45,132 --> 00:12:45,958 Tournament. 302 00:12:45,959 --> 00:12:47,896 No, no, that's definitely not right. 303 00:12:47,897 --> 00:12:49,076 Tournam... 304 00:12:50,184 --> 00:12:53,143 holy shit, I have no idea anymore. 305 00:12:53,168 --> 00:12:55,866 Tour-na-ment. 306 00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:59,036 - "Tour-nament." - "Tour-na-ment." 307 00:12:59,037 --> 00:13:01,026 Alfred! 308 00:13:02,159 --> 00:13:04,193 Alfred, are you...? 309 00:13:04,265 --> 00:13:05,046 Stoned? 310 00:13:05,047 --> 00:13:06,936 No. 311 00:13:06,937 --> 00:13:09,810 You're grounded. No tournament for you. 312 00:13:10,318 --> 00:13:11,006 That sounds right. 313 00:13:11,796 --> 00:13:12,796 Who are you? 314 00:13:12,798 --> 00:13:14,747 That's... 315 00:13:16,656 --> 00:13:17,735 Alfred, come. 316 00:13:18,737 --> 00:13:21,697 317 00:13:24,372 --> 00:13:27,341 I'm sorry, guys. I can't do the Bong Pong-a-thon. 318 00:13:27,628 --> 00:13:29,587 Shelly really put her foot down. 319 00:13:29,612 --> 00:13:31,561 Hey, we're gonna break you out. 320 00:13:31,586 --> 00:13:33,755 Wait, why are you whispering? 321 00:13:33,867 --> 00:13:36,420 Oh, I don't know. Duh. [chuckles] 322 00:13:36,421 --> 00:13:38,809 It's useless. She's... she's got me on lockdown. 323 00:13:38,865 --> 00:13:41,312 It's cool. We got a plan. 324 00:13:41,312 --> 00:13:42,451 Does your plan involve 325 00:13:42,452 --> 00:13:44,391 trying to pose my wife with a naked guy 326 00:13:44,392 --> 00:13:46,351 and then using the pictures as blackmail? 327 00:13:46,352 --> 00:13:48,281 No! 328 00:13:48,282 --> 00:13:50,291 We need a new plan. 329 00:13:50,292 --> 00:13:52,351 I've got one. 330 00:13:52,352 --> 00:13:55,543 331 00:13:55,671 --> 00:13:57,650 [knocking on door] 332 00:13:58,302 --> 00:14:00,311 Well, isn't today your lucky day? 333 00:14:00,312 --> 00:14:01,715 - Can I help you? - No. 334 00:14:01,811 --> 00:14:03,401 But I can help you. 335 00:14:03,402 --> 00:14:04,861 Really? 336 00:14:04,862 --> 00:14:06,725 Jack Slenderson, Clypac Vacuums. 337 00:14:06,750 --> 00:14:08,659 I'm sure you've heard of us. 338 00:14:08,660 --> 00:14:11,304 We're one of the big dogs in the vacuum community. 339 00:14:11,304 --> 00:14:12,413 I haven't. 340 00:14:12,414 --> 00:14:16,303 - Excuse me. - W-wait, uh, shoes off! 341 00:14:16,304 --> 00:14:18,373 Now, when the science doctors at Clypac 342 00:14:18,374 --> 00:14:20,273 set out to revolutionize 343 00:14:20,274 --> 00:14:21,403 the way we suck shit up off the floor, 344 00:14:21,404 --> 00:14:24,253 they knew they had to think outside the box. 345 00:14:24,254 --> 00:14:27,835 Which is why this comes in a case. 346 00:14:27,836 --> 00:14:28,925 That's still a box. 347 00:14:30,029 --> 00:14:32,742 May I... cunt-inue? 348 00:14:33,274 --> 00:14:35,032 See that blue cord? 349 00:14:35,057 --> 00:14:36,843 That blue cord hooks up to the Internet. 350 00:14:36,844 --> 00:14:38,748 That's what really makes the R2D2 351 00:14:38,749 --> 00:14:40,206 so incredibly special. 352 00:14:40,206 --> 00:14:42,423 Now, the R2D1 did not have several features. 353 00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:44,383 Obviously, you've got some nice fancy lights here, 354 00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:45,583 but it's incredibly functional. 355 00:14:46,176 --> 00:14:47,854 In fact, let's fire it up right now! 356 00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:50,120 - [whirring] - You feel that power? 357 00:14:50,121 --> 00:14:51,937 You feel the power in your pussy? 358 00:14:51,938 --> 00:14:54,926 It's like Christmas following a Sunday morning! 359 00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:57,527 - It's very loud! - You know who hates this sound? 360 00:14:57,552 --> 00:14:59,652 - Dirt. - I do, too! 361 00:15:01,588 --> 00:15:05,487 362 00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:07,518 [laughing, chatter] 363 00:15:14,528 --> 00:15:16,617 Oh, uh, excuse me. Do you know where the sign-in is? 364 00:15:16,618 --> 00:15:18,142 Oh, yeah, sure! 365 00:15:18,143 --> 00:15:21,072 It's just right up inside my sister's stretched-out pussy. 366 00:15:21,074 --> 00:15:22,974 Oh. 367 00:15:24,094 --> 00:15:26,053 Did she say it was in her sister's pussy? 368 00:15:26,054 --> 00:15:27,774 "Stretched-out pussy." 369 00:15:27,775 --> 00:15:30,362 You did it, man. You got Nugget. 370 00:15:30,362 --> 00:15:32,758 Yeah. Some of the competition around here is pretty mean. 371 00:15:32,782 --> 00:15:36,701 The key to bong pong is extreme focus. 372 00:15:36,702 --> 00:15:38,751 Like, laser-fucking foc... 373 00:15:38,752 --> 00:15:40,762 holy shit, man, look! 374 00:15:42,104 --> 00:15:44,123 Okay, come on. Let's go do this. 375 00:15:44,632 --> 00:15:47,652 376 00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:51,330 Here we are at the 36th Annual 377 00:15:51,355 --> 00:15:52,434 Bong Pong-a-thon. 378 00:15:52,752 --> 00:15:54,751 Where does the time go, huh, Gary? 379 00:15:54,752 --> 00:15:57,591 It's un-fucking-believable, Jerry. 380 00:15:57,592 --> 00:15:59,801 It really is. Really is. 381 00:15:59,802 --> 00:16:01,731 First-round matches are underway 382 00:16:01,732 --> 00:16:03,651 and right now, Team Brain Damage'd 383 00:16:03,652 --> 00:16:05,641 find themselves in the middle of a real bong burner 384 00:16:05,642 --> 00:16:07,641 with the Frat Buds. 385 00:16:07,642 --> 00:16:09,621 Hey, just... [breathes deeply] 386 00:16:09,622 --> 00:16:11,632 [exhales] 387 00:16:12,422 --> 00:16:15,241 Team Brain Damage'd working off the dust. 388 00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:16,475 Right again, Jer-bear. 389 00:16:16,802 --> 00:16:19,129 - [applause] - Come on! What's going on? 390 00:16:19,154 --> 00:16:20,551 I don't know. I... I'm nervous, I guess. 391 00:16:20,702 --> 00:16:23,159 Nervous? You're... you're a fucking brain surgeon. 392 00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:24,189 Yeah, but that's different. 393 00:16:24,191 --> 00:16:26,220 This is the Bong Pong-a-thon. 394 00:16:26,422 --> 00:16:27,501 The stakes are so high! 395 00:16:27,526 --> 00:16:29,385 Just try and relax and have some fun. 396 00:16:29,386 --> 00:16:30,465 How am I supposed to relax and have fun? 397 00:16:30,466 --> 00:16:32,466 [crowd cheers] Yeah! 398 00:16:34,376 --> 00:16:36,535 Why don't you let 'er rip there, Nuggles? 399 00:16:36,536 --> 00:16:38,585 [pipe gurgling] 400 00:16:38,586 --> 00:16:40,476 [crowd murmurs] Whoa! 401 00:16:47,426 --> 00:16:48,456 Wow! 402 00:16:51,376 --> 00:16:53,168 [applause, whistling] 403 00:16:53,169 --> 00:16:54,902 That was a huge hit, Gary! 404 00:16:54,927 --> 00:16:56,484 He's really taking it up a notch. 405 00:16:56,485 --> 00:16:58,375 I wasn't even looking. Totally missed it, Jerry. 406 00:17:04,287 --> 00:17:05,858 [grunts] Yes! 407 00:17:05,944 --> 00:17:07,434 The doctor is in! 408 00:17:07,435 --> 00:17:08,544 He's a brain surgeon. 409 00:17:08,545 --> 00:17:10,474 I am a brain surgeon. 410 00:17:10,475 --> 00:17:13,354 411 00:17:13,355 --> 00:17:14,415 [cheering] 412 00:17:33,385 --> 00:17:35,534 That's what I'm talking about! 413 00:17:35,535 --> 00:17:37,455 - Whoo! - It's awesome! 414 00:17:40,335 --> 00:17:42,345 - Whoa! - [laughing] 415 00:17:44,425 --> 00:17:45,444 [grunts] 416 00:17:45,445 --> 00:17:48,020 Our championship match is set. 417 00:17:48,020 --> 00:17:50,019 To no one's surprise, our returning champions, 418 00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:52,947 the Tamp-Bongs, have made it all the way into the finals. 419 00:17:52,972 --> 00:17:54,901 But the real story here is that of their competitor. 420 00:17:54,902 --> 00:17:57,290 Coming out of a 25-year retirement, 421 00:17:57,290 --> 00:17:58,419 Team Brain Damage'd. 422 00:17:58,420 --> 00:18:00,062 At some point, you have to ask yourself, Jerry, 423 00:18:00,087 --> 00:18:01,405 "Who gives a shit?" 424 00:18:01,406 --> 00:18:03,395 All right, what is going on with you, Gary? 425 00:18:03,396 --> 00:18:05,455 Susan left me. She took the kids. 426 00:18:05,456 --> 00:18:08,415 [exhales] Jesus. 427 00:18:08,416 --> 00:18:10,335 Do I have to stay here for the rest of this? 428 00:18:10,336 --> 00:18:11,425 Yeah. 429 00:18:11,426 --> 00:18:13,886 430 00:18:13,886 --> 00:18:16,677 Shelly, I would have to be a real maniac 431 00:18:16,702 --> 00:18:20,195 to have collected all of the dog shit 432 00:18:20,196 --> 00:18:21,865 from your neighborhood 433 00:18:21,890 --> 00:18:24,919 and pour it right here on your carpet. 434 00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:26,899 Uh, don't. Don't! 435 00:18:27,352 --> 00:18:29,209 Oh, you did that! 436 00:18:29,210 --> 00:18:30,780 - Oh! - Oh, look at that. 437 00:18:30,924 --> 00:18:33,210 - Ugh! - You ready for the magic? 438 00:18:33,211 --> 00:18:34,270 Yeah. 439 00:18:34,271 --> 00:18:36,331 [motor sputters] 440 00:18:38,281 --> 00:18:41,310 [sputtering] 441 00:18:41,311 --> 00:18:42,440 Well, that's not good. 442 00:18:42,441 --> 00:18:44,400 Well, hang on now, hang on. 443 00:18:44,401 --> 00:18:47,260 I could just... maybe if I just... 444 00:18:47,261 --> 00:18:48,340 - oh, yeah. - Oh. 445 00:18:48,341 --> 00:18:50,240 - Wh... - That's just 446 00:18:50,241 --> 00:18:51,320 pushing the shit deeper 447 00:18:51,321 --> 00:18:52,370 into the fibers of your carpet. 448 00:18:52,371 --> 00:18:54,795 Oh. [groans] 449 00:18:54,820 --> 00:18:57,032 Now the peanut butter has mixed. 450 00:18:57,057 --> 00:19:00,091 It looks like a Reese's Pieces, but a shit version. 451 00:19:00,092 --> 00:19:01,946 Here we are. It all comes down to this. 452 00:19:01,946 --> 00:19:03,529 One bong to one bong. 453 00:19:03,593 --> 00:19:05,632 What was that name again? Team Tamp-Bongs? 454 00:19:05,633 --> 00:19:07,643 What, do you shove bongs up your p-chenks? 455 00:19:09,319 --> 00:19:10,802 Team Brain Damage'd doing their best 456 00:19:10,827 --> 00:19:11,846 to psych those girls out. 457 00:19:11,847 --> 00:19:14,726 Shove this, cheese dick. 458 00:19:14,727 --> 00:19:16,716 [groaning] 459 00:19:16,717 --> 00:19:18,836 - Shit! - [groans] 460 00:19:18,837 --> 00:19:20,906 Oh, my eye. I can't see. 461 00:19:20,907 --> 00:19:22,836 If Team Brain Damage'd doesn't make this shot, 462 00:19:22,837 --> 00:19:24,706 - they're out. - Like me. 463 00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:25,926 Right out of the condo. 464 00:19:25,927 --> 00:19:27,746 I can't see! I can't do it! 465 00:19:27,747 --> 00:19:28,806 Yes, yes! Hey, listen to me! 466 00:19:28,807 --> 00:19:31,876 Yes. Yes, you can. 467 00:19:31,877 --> 00:19:33,756 Okay. 468 00:19:33,757 --> 00:19:34,916 Remember your training. 469 00:19:34,917 --> 00:19:37,866 - "Trust the process." - Go deep inside. 470 00:19:37,867 --> 00:19:39,826 - Deep inside. - Come on. 471 00:19:39,827 --> 00:19:42,786 - Okay. - Shh. 472 00:19:42,787 --> 00:19:45,707 473 00:19:56,797 --> 00:19:58,536 No good! It's no good! 474 00:19:58,537 --> 00:20:00,848 It's all over. The Tamp-Bongs have won it. 475 00:20:00,873 --> 00:20:02,862 - Was I close? - No, not even cl... 476 00:20:02,863 --> 00:20:04,972 oh, take the blindfold off. 477 00:20:04,973 --> 00:20:07,129 Don't know why you did that. You couldn't see already. 478 00:20:07,154 --> 00:20:08,527 - Oh. - You didn't have to 479 00:20:08,527 --> 00:20:09,666 - add another... - I was trying to use the Force. 480 00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:11,566 I guess I'll go back to Spencer's Gifts. 481 00:20:11,567 --> 00:20:13,466 I'm sorry it didn't work out, Weasel. 482 00:20:13,467 --> 00:20:15,486 - It's cool, man. - Tell him, "Me, too." 483 00:20:15,487 --> 00:20:17,082 You can tell him yourself. He's right there. 484 00:20:17,107 --> 00:20:19,526 O-oh, I'm sorry I let you down, Weasel. 485 00:20:19,527 --> 00:20:22,556 But, hey, at least we won in '87, right? 486 00:20:22,557 --> 00:20:25,496 - What? - What? 487 00:20:25,497 --> 00:20:27,051 You won the tournament before? 488 00:20:27,076 --> 00:20:30,485 - Yeah, 1987. - Oh, that's right, man! 489 00:20:30,487 --> 00:20:31,646 That's totally right! 490 00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:33,466 [chuckles] 491 00:20:33,851 --> 00:20:35,070 Okay, later, 'gator. 492 00:20:35,071 --> 00:20:36,970 Finally done. 493 00:20:36,971 --> 00:20:38,910 You wanna get out of here and get some food? 494 00:20:38,911 --> 00:20:40,960 I'm just gonna take some pills. I'll watch you eat. 495 00:20:40,961 --> 00:20:43,861 496 00:20:46,971 --> 00:20:48,960 - Hey, Pac? - What? 497 00:20:48,961 --> 00:20:51,850 I know you think this whole thing 498 00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:52,910 was a waste of time, 499 00:20:52,911 --> 00:20:54,930 but I just wanted to say thanks. 500 00:20:54,931 --> 00:20:57,871 I really needed something like this. 501 00:21:01,951 --> 00:21:03,060 Oh, oh, hey! 502 00:21:03,061 --> 00:21:05,920 If you ever need brain surgery, 503 00:21:05,921 --> 00:21:07,050 give me a call. 504 00:21:07,051 --> 00:21:08,890 I will. 505 00:21:08,891 --> 00:21:11,050 And I will. 506 00:21:11,051 --> 00:21:13,901 - Let's get you inside. - All right. 507 00:21:15,031 --> 00:21:18,010 I don't really think that's doing much of anything. 508 00:21:18,011 --> 00:21:20,001 Do you have a vacuum cleaner? 509 00:21:21,051 --> 00:21:23,910 Are you seriously asking me that?! 510 00:21:23,911 --> 00:21:25,970 That's about all the time we have for today's demo. 511 00:21:25,971 --> 00:21:27,840 I hope you've enjoyed what you've seen 512 00:21:27,841 --> 00:21:29,615 and, uh, if you have any feedback, 513 00:21:29,616 --> 00:21:33,755 negative or positive, please fill out a customer response survey at Clypacs. edu 514 00:21:35,615 --> 00:21:37,564 Dot E-D-U? 515 00:21:37,565 --> 00:21:40,574 516 00:21:41,342 --> 00:21:43,784 Listen, you can hear it in my chest. Ah-hh-hh... 517 00:21:43,785 --> 00:21:45,704 The first thing I want everyone to know 518 00:21:45,705 --> 00:21:49,674 is that I'm feeling good and sharper than ever. 519 00:21:49,675 --> 00:21:53,564 These chairs are way better than cash, am I right? 520 00:21:54,555 --> 00:21:55,754 Yeah, I was mad at first, 521 00:21:55,755 --> 00:21:58,564 but I'm not complaining. It feels great on my shoulder. 522 00:21:58,565 --> 00:22:01,744 I think I overworked it when I ruined that lady's home. 523 00:22:01,745 --> 00:22:05,574 First off, I am banning eggs on Tuesdays. 524 00:22:06,446 --> 00:22:09,684 No more eggs from sundown to sunup on Tuesdays, 525 00:22:09,685 --> 00:22:11,754 unless, of course, you're left-handed. 526 00:22:11,755 --> 00:22:15,744 This guy is finally starting to make some sense. 527 00:22:15,745 --> 00:22:17,755 Of course, I'm left-handed, so I'm biased, but... 528 00:22:25,895 --> 00:22:30,895 - synced and corrected by hawken45 - - www.addic7ed.com - 529 00:22:30,945 --> 00:22:35,495 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36400

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