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1
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Twenty-five years ago, my parents were
the most popular teenagers in America.
4
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When Dad wasn't singing,
he spent his life on a surfboard.
5
00:00:58,935 --> 00:01:01,103
They called him the Big Kahuna.
6
00:01:01,854 --> 00:01:05,066
When I was born,
Dad wanted to call me Little Kahuna.
7
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Luckily, he settled for Bobby.
8
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As for Mom, she joined that strange cult
called the Mouseketeers.
9
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Now, if you would be beautiful
Do this every day
10
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For neatness really pays
11
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Anyhow, they got married and moved to Ohio
right after the accident.
12
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Don't get them started
on the surf accident.
13
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Around our house,
we have this nightly ritual.
14
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It's called
"dinner, and then the accident story."
15
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Let me spare you this.
16
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Twenty years ago, while surfing,
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this humongous wave
knocked the Kahuna right out of Dad,
18
00:02:01,163 --> 00:02:04,000
The hair. Did you wet the hair?
Don't wet the hair, please.
19
00:02:04,083 --> 00:02:07,712
Try to get the water here, okay?
Jamie, is my hair okay? Good. Okay.
20
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Okay. Hi! Need a car?
21
00:02:11,424 --> 00:02:13,509
This is my dad now.
22
00:02:13,592 --> 00:02:15,970
The closest he gets to the ocean
these days
23
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is when he plays the Surf King
in order to sell cars on TV.
24
00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:25,521
Alan!
25
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...the largest dealership in Ohio.
26
00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:30,568
-How's it going? Alan...
- It means he worries a lot,
27
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works longer hours than a coal miner
and can be pretty grouchy sometimes.
28
00:02:36,282 --> 00:02:39,994
Fleishman, Fleishman, massage this baby
and make her look pretty like the rest.
29
00:02:40,077 --> 00:02:41,787
What's the matter with you guys?
30
00:02:42,747 --> 00:02:45,499
It's not that he's a creep or anything.
31
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I think Dad just forgot how to have fun.
32
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This is our house in Ohio,
and this is my mom now.
33
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Bobby! Come get your lunch.
34
00:03:12,902 --> 00:03:16,238
As for me,
I developed a serious identity crisis
35
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and was at the breaking point.
36
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I couldn't live like this anymore.
One day, I cracked.
37
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I am.
38
00:03:33,381 --> 00:03:38,094
Because I know exactly, unfailingly
39
00:03:38,177 --> 00:03:41,222
and with absolute certainty
what's in there.
40
00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:45,601
It's been in there every day of my life.
41
00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:56,153
It's peanut butter, isn't it, Morn?
Isn't it?
42
00:03:56,904 --> 00:04:01,826
What do you mean, "I believe it is"?
Of course it is.
43
00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:05,162
You know there's peanut butter in there.
44
00:04:05,246 --> 00:04:08,332
It's like a sick kind of fixation
with you.
45
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:12,378
Well, it's good for you. You need it.
46
00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:19,301
No, Ma. You need oxygen.
47
00:04:19,385 --> 00:04:23,597
But peanut butter is not one of
the elements essential to human life.
48
00:04:24,723 --> 00:04:31,772
Wait a minute. Let me get this straight.
49
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:35,151
Ma, I'm just saying I need a change.
50
00:04:35,234 --> 00:04:42,867
Something different once in a while.
A little variety.
51
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:46,787
Tomorrow, you get the chunky.
52
00:04:47,538 --> 00:04:50,291
It was useless. I was stressed.
53
00:04:51,250 --> 00:04:54,378
Dad was developing
some serious stress problems, too,
54
00:04:54,462 --> 00:04:59,925
from his relentless obsession
with selling, selling, selling.
55
00:05:00,009 --> 00:05:02,011
What are all the salesmen doing, sleeping?
56
00:05:03,679 --> 00:05:12,188
And although Mom wouldn't recognize stress
if it jumped up and bit her,
57
00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:22,531
shopping, and, yes, that's right,
more shopping.
58
00:05:22,615 --> 00:05:26,452
And finally realized
we all needed a break.
59
00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:28,120
A vacation?
60
00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:30,789
So, we're off to Hawaii,
61
00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:33,292
a fun place for a kid
who only wears black.
62
00:05:34,168 --> 00:05:36,420
Hey, babe, how about a Cuervo Gold?
63
00:05:36,504 --> 00:05:38,380
Now, you know I can't do that,
64
00:05:38,464 --> 00:05:41,300
but would you like
a little junior pilot pin?
65
00:05:50,893 --> 00:05:53,854
That hair. That smile. Those...
66
00:05:53,938 --> 00:05:59,652
You're Annette! Oh, God.
It must be so wonderful being you.
67
00:06:00,611 --> 00:06:02,446
And you're the Big Chihuahua!
68
00:06:02,530 --> 00:06:05,741
Kahuna. But that's way back in the past.
69
00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:09,119
Now I'm a stressed-out car salesman.
70
00:06:09,203 --> 00:06:12,081
Say, would you like to hear
about an accident I once had?
71
00:06:12,164 --> 00:06:13,207
Oh, no.
72
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:15,334
I'll pass.
73
00:06:15,918 --> 00:06:19,922
Geez, I wish I could call the office
and find out what's going on.
74
00:06:20,005 --> 00:06:23,467
Don't think about work now, sweetheart.
75
00:06:23,551 --> 00:06:27,471
Just concentrate on relaxing
and having fun again.
76
00:06:27,555 --> 00:06:31,600
Annette, I want to.
It's just, I hope I remember how.
77
00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:33,811
There's one thing I do remember.
78
00:06:34,937 --> 00:06:36,438
How much I love you.
79
00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:41,652
But the years have hardened me, Annette.
80
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They've certainly hardened your hair.
81
00:06:44,655 --> 00:06:46,448
-Well, I've got you this time--
-Honey! Don't.
82
00:06:46,532 --> 00:06:49,326
It's all right. I was just fixing his hat.
Just fixing his hat.
83
00:06:49,410 --> 00:06:52,705
Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be serving
dinner in our main cabin shortly.
84
00:06:52,788 --> 00:06:56,083
For those of you who ordered
special meals, good move.
85
00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:58,669
Great. Dinner!
86
00:06:59,253 --> 00:07:06,343
Bobby, did I ever tell you
the time when I was surfing?
87
00:07:06,427 --> 00:07:10,806
Dad, does the phrase "get over it"
mean anything to you?
88
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:19,106
Yeah? Well, does the expression
"a rap in the mouth" mean anything to you?
89
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:20,190
"Not!
'Too!
90
00:07:20,274 --> 00:07:24,695
Stop it, boys. I don't want this to happen
when we get to Los Angeles.
91
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,196
I thought we were going to Hawaii.
92
00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:30,993
But we're stopping in LA
to see your sister, Sandi.
93
00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:34,788
My little baby, my honey-bunny,
my lambie-wambie.
94
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:39,543
-She's the apple of my eye.
-This is why we don't travel.
95
00:10:10,861 --> 00:10:14,573
I hope the bags don't take too long.
We've only got a ten-hour layover.
96
00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:16,867
That's perfect. There it is. Here.
97
00:10:18,494 --> 00:10:20,496
-Where's the movie stars?
-What?
98
00:10:21,705 --> 00:10:27,044
I thought LA was supposed to be
loaded with movie stars,
99
00:10:27,044 --> 00:10:30,506
Honey, that's just
what all Midwesterners think.
100
00:10:30,589 --> 00:10:35,928
LA is just like any other place.
101
00:10:35,928 --> 00:10:37,805
Excuse me, ma'am,
but I believe this is my bag.
102
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:43,352
I'm sorry. Of course.
Mine's leatherette and this seems to be--
103
00:10:43,435 --> 00:10:45,604
Pigskin. Thank you very much.
104
00:10:48,857 --> 00:10:53,737
Hey, Morn, you know who that was?
105
00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:54,947
That was...
106
00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,159
Nah, I guess I was wrong.
107
00:11:02,579 --> 00:11:03,664
Sorry.
108
00:11:06,959 --> 00:11:08,752
We're not in right now,
but leave a message
109
00:11:08,836 --> 00:11:19,972
and we'll get back to you
as soon as we can. Okay? Bye.
110
00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:30,899
When you say, "We're not in,"
who exactly is "we"?
111
00:11:30,983 --> 00:11:33,318
It's beautiful, isn't it?
112
00:11:33,402 --> 00:11:35,779
It smells kind of funny, don't you think?
113
00:11:35,863 --> 00:11:38,949
Yeah. It smells like the ocean.
114
00:11:39,658 --> 00:11:41,243
What did Sandi say?
115
00:11:41,326 --> 00:11:45,831
I didn't talk to her. I got the machine.
She said, "We're not in."
116
00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:49,501
Now, what do you think that means,
"We're not in"?
117
00:11:49,585 --> 00:11:51,211
Wild guess?
118
00:11:51,295 --> 00:11:53,630
I think it means she's not in.
119
00:11:53,714 --> 00:11:55,841
Boy, it's quite a piece of dialogue
120
00:11:55,924 --> 00:11:58,886
when you two intellectual giants
get together.
121
00:11:58,969 --> 00:12:01,889
-I should be writing this down.
-This kid's starting to bug me, Annette.
122
00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:04,266
-I know, honey--
-I'm telling you. Bobby, that's enough.
123
00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:06,476
-That's enough. Now cut it out.
-Don't start anything.
124
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,729
Now, come on. Just relax.
125
00:12:08,812 --> 00:12:16,528
Okay, but here's my point.
She didn't say, "I'm not in."
126
00:12:16,612 --> 00:12:18,447
Now, what does "we" mean?
127
00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:26,955
I believe it's the plural form,
indicating more than one.
128
00:12:27,039 --> 00:12:29,541
Do you know what conjugate means, Dad?
129
00:12:29,625 --> 00:12:41,219
Conjugate? I'd like to conjugate you
in the back of the head with a rock.
130
00:12:41,303 --> 00:12:43,597
-Okay, okay.
-Please.
131
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:58,570
Look, honey. It's our old beach.
132
00:12:58,654 --> 00:13:00,447
Yeah. Big deal.
133
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:05,535
And remember this? It was our song.
134
00:13:05,619 --> 00:13:08,330
Hey, the radio has a dial, you know.
135
00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:10,666
Sing with me, honey.
136
00:13:10,749 --> 00:13:12,668
Come on, honey, I'm not in the mood.
137
00:13:12,751 --> 00:13:15,504
-Please?
-I can't. I'm driving, okay?
138
00:13:15,587 --> 00:13:17,047
I mean, I gotta concentrate.
139
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,091
Thanks. I owe you one there, Dad.
140
00:13:20,926 --> 00:13:25,681
Sandi, you keep leaving the soap
on the shower floor,
141
00:13:25,764 --> 00:13:31,603
and it keeps getting gross and squishy,
and then it just disappears.
142
00:13:31,687 --> 00:13:36,274
This was my favorite soap on a rope,
and look at this. It's just rope.
143
00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:39,987
Gosh, Michael,
what a gut-wrenching tragedy.
144
00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:43,365
Get Jerry Lewis on the phone.
Let's get a telethon going.
145
00:13:45,283 --> 00:13:48,036
-Okay. I'm sorry I've gotta do this...
-No!
146
00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,205
...but I'm with the smart-ass police.
147
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:53,542
You're a repeat offender,
and in clear violation.
148
00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:56,086
And now you go out the window.
149
00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:03,719
What are you writing?
150
00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:05,762
A letter to my folks.
151
00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:09,725
Yeah? Well, I'll bet
I'm not mentioned in that one, either.
152
00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:20,235
That's right. Michael, I'm sorry.
153
00:14:20,318 --> 00:14:23,739
He's just become
the teeniest bit conservative.
154
00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:25,741
What number did you say?
155
00:14:25,824 --> 00:14:27,617
2566.
156
00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:38,462
Sandi lives on a pier?
157
00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:41,506
Well, if I recall, one summer,
you lived under a pier.
158
00:14:42,507 --> 00:14:53,769
Annette, honey, I am not my daughter.
159
00:14:53,852 --> 00:14:58,231
Adorable? It's strange.
Weird things happen on a pier.
160
00:14:58,315 --> 00:15:02,569
When you say, "We're not in,"
who exactly is "we"?
161
00:15:11,411 --> 00:15:12,621
Michael!
162
00:15:14,039 --> 00:15:15,123
What?
163
00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:22,214
You got any other clothes?
164
00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,466
-Good.
165
00:15:36,228 --> 00:15:39,106
Michael, sweetheart, I love you.
Now get the hell out.
166
00:15:39,189 --> 00:15:46,780
-Is this, like, a chick thing?
-No, it's, like, a parent thing.
167
00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:50,367
Sandi, come on. Open the door!
168
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,327
I'm coming, Dad!
169
00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:55,705
I think I hear something.
170
00:15:58,083 --> 00:16:00,752
You mean she's making noise
in her own apartment?
171
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:04,256
They just go nuts in California, huh, Dad?
172
00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:07,259
-Okay, now what, now what?
-I-- I don't know.
173
00:16:07,342 --> 00:16:13,932
Okay, look, I do. I do. Look.
174
00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:16,309
And we trust that as mature adults,
they'll understand us.
175
00:16:16,935 --> 00:16:19,479
Sandi!
Sandi, if you've got a guy in there,
176
00:16:19,563 --> 00:16:31,158
I'm gonna cut off his toes
and sell them to the bait shop!
177
00:16:31,158 --> 00:16:33,493
He's battering down the door
with someone's head?
178
00:16:33,577 --> 00:16:35,787
Dad, my eyes are crossing!
179
00:16:35,871 --> 00:16:38,790
I'm out of here.
Sandi, I've always loved you.
180
00:16:39,374 --> 00:16:40,500
Dad!
181
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:59,895
Mom! Dad! Bobby! What a lovely surprise.
182
00:17:01,313 --> 00:17:10,280
Sweetheart, you look beautiful.
A little thin. Doesn't she look thin?
183
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:18,330
-Who was just in here?
-I was on the phone. Dad!
184
00:17:18,330 --> 00:17:23,835
Two toothbrushes, aftershave lotion,
and the toilet seat is up. I knew it.
185
00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:26,296
-What was that?
-What was what?
186
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,422
-That thing.
-What thing?
187
00:17:27,505 --> 00:17:36,765
I saw you throw a thing.
Did you see that thing?
188
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:44,147
Now I get it.
189
00:17:44,231 --> 00:17:46,566
-Bobby!
-Honey, what are you doing?
190
00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:47,943
What am I doing? It seems to me
191
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:50,862
that your daughter has developed
a serious interest in surfing.
192
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:52,656
Or surfers. Come on, Bobby.
193
00:17:53,323 --> 00:17:54,366
Honey!
194
00:17:55,033 --> 00:17:56,159
I'll be back.
195
00:18:01,957 --> 00:18:05,543
Sweetheart, is there something
you wanna tell me?
196
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:13,301
Mom, that was my boyfriend.
He wants to marry me
197
00:18:13,385 --> 00:18:16,096
And I don't know what's happening.
I don't know, Mom. What'll I do?
198
00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:18,556
Let's go shopping-
199
00:18:19,266 --> 00:18:27,315
Bobby! Bobby! Slow up.
200
00:18:27,399 --> 00:18:28,775
I'm gonna break his legs.
201
00:18:28,858 --> 00:18:30,735
-I'm gonna break his face.
-Thank you, Dad.
202
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:33,655
You continue to set
a great example for me.
203
00:18:33,738 --> 00:18:35,699
Bobby, come on, before we lose him.
204
00:18:40,370 --> 00:18:44,666
-I don't believe it, Bobby.
-Pop! Pop!
205
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:47,085
-I thought I saw him coming up here.
-Pop, Pop, look out!
206
00:19:06,271 --> 00:19:08,064
Whoopsie-daisy.
207
00:19:08,148 --> 00:19:10,317
"Whoopsie-daisy"?
208
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,777
Well, back in my day, a surfboard--
209
00:19:12,861 --> 00:19:16,656
A surfboard was about nine feet long,
weighed about 50 pounds.
210
00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:18,533
Not like this sissy job.
211
00:19:18,616 --> 00:19:20,118
What?
212
00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,412
Yeah, it took a real man
to handle one of those babies.
213
00:19:23,246 --> 00:19:27,542
You know, I think the sport has become
a little bit effeminate, don't you think?
214
00:19:29,878 --> 00:19:33,673
Just for the record,
I have a wildly different opinion.
215
00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:36,509
-I like the kid.
-Yeah.
216
00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:39,804
Great. That means
we're hitting it off, doesn't it?
217
00:19:39,888 --> 00:19:44,017
I don't like the guy with the hair helmet.
218
00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:47,395
Hair? Hair?
219
00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:49,898
You're talking about hair?
220
00:19:50,523 --> 00:20:10,126
You guys get your haircuts
at the Braille Barber College?
221
00:20:10,794 --> 00:20:12,253
These are sins here.
222
00:20:13,004 --> 00:20:16,466
I, Zed, am god here. Right?
223
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:18,301
Right!
224
00:20:18,385 --> 00:20:21,638
Hey, listen, thanks, babe.
You guys have been great.
225
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,014
We gotta split now.
226
00:20:23,098 --> 00:20:26,309
And thanks for showing us
your little toys. They're really cute.
227
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,686
-Hey!
-Hey!
228
00:20:29,270 --> 00:20:32,190
They're really good. Nice.
Nice. Thanks a lot, huh?
229
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:35,276
-Wait up, guys.
-You know, nice kids.
230
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:52,502
Pop, you're really aware.
231
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:55,171
This wind. Sandi, how's my hair?
232
00:20:55,255 --> 00:20:56,506
It looks great, Morn.
233
00:21:09,352 --> 00:21:20,405
Look.
234
00:21:20,488 --> 00:21:31,332
Mom, Dad, the early years.
I'm getting goose bumps.
235
00:21:31,332 --> 00:21:32,333
Look.
236
00:21:34,043 --> 00:21:37,005
Dick Dale's on tonight.
Let's go say hi to Dick.
237
00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:41,885
Honey, we can come back in the year 2000
and say hi to Dick.
238
00:21:41,968 --> 00:21:43,845
Just for a minute.
239
00:21:43,928 --> 00:21:47,265
All right. All right.
But exactly five minutes, okay?
240
00:21:47,348 --> 00:21:48,725
I'll wait in the car.
241
00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:52,020
Dad, it's been a pleasant visit.
Come back real soon, okay?
242
00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:54,814
All right, honey. Okay, I'm coming in.
243
00:21:58,067 --> 00:21:59,486
Parking!
244
00:22:04,365 --> 00:22:06,242
The Big Kahuna!
245
00:22:06,326 --> 00:22:09,954
Edd Byrnes. Wow! How kooky!
246
00:22:15,043 --> 00:22:18,046
You know, they make a drink here
called the Stunned Mullet.
247
00:22:18,129 --> 00:22:19,881
Serve it in a coconut shell.
248
00:22:22,217 --> 00:22:24,135
Well, I once saw a woman
drink one of these,
249
00:22:24,219 --> 00:22:27,138
take off all her clothes
and dance the Pony
250
00:22:27,222 --> 00:22:29,557
right here on this very table.
251
00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:38,900
And your point is?
252
00:22:38,900 --> 00:22:42,654
That's very generous of you
in a sleazy kind of way,
253
00:22:42,737 --> 00:22:45,323
but my husband and I
have a plane to catch soon.
254
00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:48,743
Say, hey,
if a dynamite-looking chick like you
255
00:22:48,826 --> 00:22:51,955
was married to
a totally bitchin' dude like me,
256
00:22:52,038 --> 00:22:55,667
you wouldn't be alone for a minute.
Catch my drift?
257
00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:06,970
Hey, slick.
258
00:23:07,053 --> 00:23:08,763
The name's Troy.
259
00:23:09,514 --> 00:23:10,723
What a shock.
260
00:23:11,849 --> 00:23:13,059
Troy.
261
00:23:21,442 --> 00:23:22,735
Yeah.
262
00:23:22,819 --> 00:23:26,698
You ought to try ordering
a real drink, slick.
263
00:23:26,781 --> 00:23:28,074
Let's go, Annette.
264
00:23:34,539 --> 00:23:36,791
Bridgette, where were we?
265
00:23:37,917 --> 00:23:40,336
Zebra hunting on the Serengeti, right?
266
00:23:42,630 --> 00:23:44,299
They glow in the dark.
267
00:23:44,382 --> 00:23:51,639
Wait, I wanna say goodbye to Sandi.
268
00:23:51,723 --> 00:23:53,641
I just wanna get on the plane, okay?
269
00:23:54,934 --> 00:23:56,686
Kahuna!
270
00:23:59,314 --> 00:24:01,941
-Connie?
-Yes! Look at you.
271
00:24:02,025 --> 00:24:14,329
Twenty years later, honey, you are still
the best-looking thing on this beach.
272
00:24:14,329 --> 00:24:16,664
Bob-- Connie, you remember Annette, huh?
273
00:24:16,748 --> 00:24:18,666
Well, I didn't mean that kind of a net.
274
00:24:20,335 --> 00:24:21,836
Are you two still dating?
275
00:24:24,714 --> 00:24:33,931
Unfortunately, you look great, too.
276
00:24:34,015 --> 00:24:41,939
Of course you do.
That's because you're boring.
277
00:24:42,649 --> 00:24:44,734
Honey, we have a plane to catch.
278
00:24:44,817 --> 00:24:46,527
Come on, Annette, there's no rush.
279
00:24:46,611 --> 00:24:48,571
-Hold on. Hold on.
-Come on.
280
00:24:48,655 --> 00:24:49,656
Honey“.
281
00:24:50,823 --> 00:24:51,824
Look.
282
00:24:51,908 --> 00:24:53,576
-I don't believe it.
-Yeah.
283
00:24:53,660 --> 00:24:55,536
You saved all this junk?
284
00:24:55,620 --> 00:24:58,081
Uh-huh. It's not junk to me.
285
00:24:58,164 --> 00:25:01,084
Just some of the memories
of the best times of my life.
286
00:25:01,167 --> 00:25:03,419
You're not an easy guy to forget,
you know.
287
00:25:03,503 --> 00:25:05,046
You're never easy. Period.
288
00:25:05,129 --> 00:25:07,215
Look at this baby picture.
289
00:25:07,298 --> 00:25:10,051
I didn't think anybody would remember me
from those days.
290
00:25:10,134 --> 00:25:12,553
Are you nuts?
You're the Big Kahuna, honey.
291
00:25:19,477 --> 00:25:21,813
Yeah. Honey, you're a legend in my place.
292
00:25:21,896 --> 00:25:22,939
Annette, look at this.
293
00:25:23,022 --> 00:25:25,233
Connie saved everything
I used to care about.
294
00:25:35,910 --> 00:25:38,329
Come on, Nettie, don't be a pill.
You got him. You won.
295
00:25:38,413 --> 00:25:40,164
That's right, honey. You won.
296
00:25:40,248 --> 00:25:43,793
Okay. Well, we've got a plane to catch.
Let's go.
297
00:25:43,876 --> 00:25:46,170
Oh, no, you're not gonna leave
without singing a song.
298
00:25:46,254 --> 00:25:50,925
My husband doesn't sing anymore.
299
00:25:50,925 --> 00:25:54,554
Connie, I wouldn't dream of leaving
this place without singing a song.
300
00:25:54,637 --> 00:25:56,305
Come on, let's go! Let's have some fun.
301
00:25:56,389 --> 00:25:58,057
-Come on, Annette. Let's go!
-Come on!
302
00:25:59,809 --> 00:26:02,103
-Hey, Mom.
-Ladies and gentlemen...
303
00:26:02,186 --> 00:26:04,147
-Mom?
-...the Big Kahuna!
304
00:26:05,857 --> 00:26:07,400
Let's hear it!
305
00:26:15,032 --> 00:26:18,327
Mom, was I adopted?
And if not, can I be now?
306
00:26:18,411 --> 00:26:19,912
Dick, you know "Venus"?
307
00:26:19,996 --> 00:26:21,080
-"Venus"?
-Yeah.
308
00:26:21,164 --> 00:26:24,500
You're asking me, Dick Dale,
if I know "Venus"?
309
00:26:25,209 --> 00:26:27,128
-No. But I know this.
-No.
310
00:26:27,211 --> 00:26:28,629
One, two, three, four!
311
00:26:56,449 --> 00:26:59,911
Well, I'm goin' out west where I belong
312
00:27:02,413 --> 00:27:05,333
Where the days are short
And the nights are long
313
00:27:08,044 --> 00:27:09,629
-Well, they walk
-They walk
314
00:27:09,712 --> 00:27:11,380
-And I walk
-I walk
315
00:27:11,464 --> 00:27:12,507
-And they twist
- They twist
316
00:27:12,590 --> 00:27:14,133
-I'll twist
-I 'II twist
317
00:27:14,217 --> 00:27:16,719
-And they shimmy, and I'll shimmy
-Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy
318
00:27:16,803 --> 00:27:18,137
-And they fly
- They fly
319
00:27:18,221 --> 00:27:19,555
And I'll fly
320
00:27:19,639 --> 00:27:22,433
Well, they're out there havin' fun
321
00:27:22,517 --> 00:27:25,144
In the warm California sun
322
00:27:48,167 --> 00:27:56,676
Well, the girls are frisky
In the old Frisco
323
00:27:58,594 --> 00:28:01,013
-And they walk
-They walk
324
00:28:01,097 --> 00:28:02,431
-And I walk
-I walk
325
00:28:02,515 --> 00:28:03,808
-And they twist
- They twist
326
00:28:03,891 --> 00:28:05,309
-And I'll twist
-I 'II twist
327
00:28:05,393 --> 00:28:08,229
-And they shimmy, and I'll shimmy
-Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy
328
00:28:08,312 --> 00:28:10,898
-And they fly
-And I'll fly
329
00:28:10,982 --> 00:28:16,737
Well, they're out there havin' fun
330
00:28:16,821 --> 00:28:19,657
Yeah, they're out there havin' fun
331
00:28:19,740 --> 00:28:22,326
In the warm California sun
332
00:28:34,463 --> 00:28:41,053
Connie...
333
00:28:43,347 --> 00:28:44,390
We missed the plane.
334
00:28:44,473 --> 00:28:47,059
Really?
How time flies when you're having--
335
00:28:47,143 --> 00:28:48,769
Don't say it.
336
00:28:49,395 --> 00:28:51,272
I've been trying to get you to have fun,
337
00:28:51,355 --> 00:28:54,066
but you didn't seem able
to have any with me, did you?
338
00:28:54,984 --> 00:28:56,611
Come on, Annette, lighten up.
339
00:28:56,694 --> 00:28:58,487
Up"?
340
00:28:58,571 --> 00:29:05,453
If this marriage gets any lighter,
it'll float.
341
00:29:05,536 --> 00:29:07,830
Or spending any time with your daughter.
342
00:29:08,623 --> 00:29:14,086
Come on, Annette, don't be ridiculous.
343
00:29:14,170 --> 00:29:17,381
Look, we are going back to Ohio right now.
344
00:29:19,634 --> 00:29:21,260
Are we?
345
00:29:21,344 --> 00:29:25,640
Well, I'm spending time
with my daughter and my son,
346
00:29:25,723 --> 00:29:32,730
and maybe, just maybe,
I'll have a little fun myself.
347
00:29:32,813 --> 00:29:36,025
Annette, I am going home.
Are you coming now?
348
00:29:36,108 --> 00:29:37,151
No.
349
00:29:37,234 --> 00:29:39,278
-Yeah.
-All right.
350
00:29:39,362 --> 00:29:40,905
Then don't come later.
351
00:29:43,699 --> 00:29:45,785
How about never?
352
00:29:45,868 --> 00:29:47,536
All right!
353
00:29:47,620 --> 00:29:48,788
Yeah!
354
00:30:01,759 --> 00:30:03,302
What the hell are you doing?
355
00:30:04,178 --> 00:30:05,972
What are you doing?
356
00:30:06,055 --> 00:30:08,766
I thought you were my girlfriend.
Don't worry, I won't let it happen again.
357
00:30:08,849 --> 00:30:11,227
Michael. Michael, put some clothes on.
358
00:30:12,144 --> 00:30:15,314
What clothes? Tuna fish
are wearing my clothes, remember?
359
00:30:16,941 --> 00:30:18,985
-Whose luggage is that?
-My mom's.
360
00:30:20,403 --> 00:30:21,404
They're still here?
361
00:30:21,487 --> 00:30:23,572
Yes. She and Bobby.
They're gonna be here any minute.
362
00:30:23,656 --> 00:30:25,074
They had a fight.
363
00:30:25,157 --> 00:30:27,326
Boy, there's a lot of that going around.
364
00:30:27,410 --> 00:30:29,870
We are not having a fight.
365
00:30:29,954 --> 00:30:36,293
-Well, am I sleeping here tonight?
-No.
366
00:30:36,377 --> 00:30:38,462
A couple of days?
367
00:30:39,255 --> 00:30:42,883
Well, that is just great.
368
00:30:42,967 --> 00:30:44,969
They start out on a three-hour tour,
369
00:30:45,803 --> 00:30:54,895
and now they're gonna be here
for God knows how long. I mean, what--
370
00:30:54,979 --> 00:30:58,399
Well, I don't. So, I think you could
make a little effort to understand.
371
00:30:58,482 --> 00:31:00,776
Understand?
I'll tell you what I understand.
372
00:31:00,860 --> 00:31:04,780
I understand that this morning
I had a home, a wardrobe and a fiancée.
373
00:31:04,864 --> 00:31:07,324
And now all I gotta do
is go out and find a new home,
374
00:31:07,408 --> 00:31:08,701
new wardrobe and maybe a new--
375
00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:11,162
Don't you dare
toss your juvenile threats at me.
376
00:31:11,245 --> 00:31:13,664
I happen to be
in the middle of a family crisis.
377
00:31:13,748 --> 00:31:16,959
And if that just inconveniences you
a little, well, too bad.
378
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:19,253
-Fine.
-Fine.
379
00:31:19,336 --> 00:31:20,337
-Fine!
-Fine!
380
00:31:20,421 --> 00:31:21,797
Would you like your stupid ring back?
381
00:31:22,381 --> 00:31:23,758
Stupid?
382
00:31:23,841 --> 00:31:26,719
A little surfer on a board.
It's a good thing you're not a plumber.
383
00:31:26,802 --> 00:31:29,305
I'd be walking around
with a toilet bowl on my hand.
384
00:31:57,083 --> 00:31:57,917
Hey, Ma,
385
00:31:58,167 --> 00:32:06,717
am I now officially
a troubled child from a broken home?
386
00:32:06,717 --> 00:32:08,219
He was pretty steamed.
387
00:32:08,969 --> 00:32:10,679
Trust me on this one.
388
00:32:10,763 --> 00:32:13,766
Your father and I
have been together a long time.
389
00:32:13,849 --> 00:32:16,685
I know what he's gonna do before he does.
390
00:32:16,769 --> 00:32:20,064
And he'll be back.
I know that in my heart.
391
00:32:21,023 --> 00:32:33,077
You know, you're awful sweet, Mom.
392
00:32:34,245 --> 00:32:42,211
Don't get bent.
393
00:32:42,294 --> 00:32:43,921
-Prison?
-No, worse than that.
394
00:32:44,004 --> 00:32:45,673
There were chicks,
but you couldn't touch them.
395
00:32:45,756 --> 00:32:46,757
Wanna hear about it?
396
00:32:48,509 --> 00:32:49,677
No.
397
00:32:50,344 --> 00:32:51,428
Another drink!
398
00:32:52,054 --> 00:32:54,723
Don't you think
you ought to slow down now, tiger?
399
00:32:54,807 --> 00:32:57,143
I'm having fun.
400
00:32:57,226 --> 00:33:00,729
Annette says I can't have any fun.
Are you fun?
401
00:33:00,813 --> 00:33:03,691
Honey, I'm an amusement park.
402
00:33:05,317 --> 00:33:07,903
Que sera, sera
403
00:33:08,487 --> 00:33:11,657
Whatever will be, will be
404
00:33:21,167 --> 00:33:26,005
Morn, will you stop having
such a good time? It's annoying.
405
00:33:26,088 --> 00:33:30,217
I've been told that.
I just think everything will turn out.
406
00:33:30,301 --> 00:33:31,552
How do you know that?
407
00:33:32,261 --> 00:33:39,894
I don't know. I'm just lucky, I guess.
I believe in happy endings.
408
00:33:39,977 --> 00:33:42,813
You and your husband--
my mother and father--
409
00:33:43,564 --> 00:33:45,065
Have separated.
410
00:33:45,149 --> 00:33:47,943
Me and my fiancé have split up.
411
00:33:48,027 --> 00:33:51,739
In less than six hours,
our lives have been shattered.
412
00:33:51,822 --> 00:33:53,073
AW Suggestions?
413
00:33:55,534 --> 00:33:57,161
A Pajama party!
414
00:34:27,983 --> 00:34:29,360
Oh, yeah!
415
00:34:35,574 --> 00:34:54,551
All right! A pajama party!
416
00:34:54,551 --> 00:34:55,552
Hey-
417
00:34:56,595 --> 00:34:58,597
Love your pajamas, Annette.
418
00:34:59,974 --> 00:35:01,058
Hey!
419
00:35:03,644 --> 00:35:05,521
Zed! Leave her alone!
420
00:35:08,482 --> 00:35:16,282
Hey, that's my mother! That's my mother!
421
00:35:17,074 --> 00:35:19,159
Get out of here, you...
422
00:35:30,921 --> 00:35:35,009
Connie, can I ask you one question?
423
00:35:36,135 --> 00:35:38,345
I've been waiting 20 years.
424
00:35:40,431 --> 00:35:46,895
What the hell is a kahuna, anyway?
425
00:35:46,895 --> 00:35:50,816
Why don't I ever learn?
Give him another drink.
426
00:35:50,899 --> 00:35:53,736
-Another drink!
-Heavy on the fruit.
427
00:35:53,819 --> 00:35:56,447
You know, I lived with a guy for years,
a real genius.
428
00:35:56,530 --> 00:35:58,824
He could take a couple of these,
a couple of coconuts,
429
00:35:58,907 --> 00:36:07,416
a piece of string,
and make a nuclear reactor.
430
00:36:07,499 --> 00:36:10,461
Dad went out that night
and drank enough Stunned Mullets
431
00:36:10,544 --> 00:36:12,212
to kill a plow horse.
432
00:36:13,130 --> 00:36:16,717
He '5 never been a big drinker.
You're about to see why.
433
00:36:44,661 --> 00:36:46,622
-All right, dudes! Seven o'clock!
-Wake up, guys!
434
00:36:46,705 --> 00:36:48,540
Racing crazy! Come on!
435
00:36:49,124 --> 00:36:51,043
-Okay, guys, let's do this!
-Surf's up, man!
436
00:36:51,126 --> 00:36:53,045
Dudes, dudes, it's totally gnarly!
437
00:36:57,341 --> 00:37:00,302
Dude! Eight-foot faces,
offshore winds, bro!
438
00:37:01,053 --> 00:37:22,408
Mountain surf report! Dume!
439
00:37:24,118 --> 00:37:28,914
Malibu's not really happening now, dude.
Check me tomorrow, all right?
440
00:37:30,791 --> 00:37:38,715
Hey, shine those spots, dude!
It's totally shredded right here!
441
00:37:38,715 --> 00:37:40,217
Wipe out!
442
00:37:49,852 --> 00:37:50,978
Let's go!
443
00:38:33,854 --> 00:38:36,523
Oh, my head.
444
00:38:40,027 --> 00:38:41,278
Hey, good morning.
445
00:38:42,070 --> 00:38:43,322
Wrong.
446
00:38:44,531 --> 00:38:46,783
-Am I dead?
-No.
447
00:38:46,867 --> 00:38:49,786
I feel dead.
448
00:38:53,832 --> 00:38:55,709
Where am I?
449
00:38:55,792 --> 00:38:57,961
You're at my friend Mountain's place.
450
00:38:58,045 --> 00:39:00,088
We tried to figure out
where to take you last night,
451
00:39:00,172 --> 00:39:01,340
but you kept saying,
452
00:39:01,423 --> 00:39:15,145
"Why-oh, why-oh, why-oh
did I ever leave Ohio?"
453
00:39:15,729 --> 00:39:17,689
I gotta get out of these clothes.
454
00:39:18,649 --> 00:39:20,442
I gotta find Annette.
455
00:39:23,195 --> 00:39:24,613
I gotta...
456
00:39:25,572 --> 00:39:26,573
I gotta...
457
00:39:27,741 --> 00:39:30,536
What is that?
458
00:39:30,619 --> 00:40:14,079
It's a little pick-me-up.
Keith Richards lives on these.
459
00:40:14,079 --> 00:40:15,163
I love it!
460
00:40:15,247 --> 00:40:18,375
I feel great. Oh, boy.
461
00:40:19,084 --> 00:40:21,253
Am I forever in your debt.
462
00:40:21,336 --> 00:40:28,844
Say, can I get you a used Ford Fair lane
or something?
463
00:40:28,844 --> 00:40:30,804
But would you mind
if I married your daughter?
464
00:40:33,724 --> 00:40:36,226
It's you! It's you!
465
00:40:37,436 --> 00:40:40,355
-Have you been sleeping with my daughter?
-Hey! Hey! Hey!
466
00:40:42,274 --> 00:40:43,483
Why don't you ask Sandi?
467
00:40:43,567 --> 00:40:45,277
Because I can't break her legs.
468
00:40:46,194 --> 00:40:48,697
Back in the Dark Ages
when you were a teener,
469
00:40:48,780 --> 00:40:50,532
you must've slept with Sandi's morn.
470
00:40:50,616 --> 00:40:54,036
As a matter of fact,
only on our honeymoon!
471
00:40:54,119 --> 00:41:01,668
I saw her yesterday,
and you must've tried.
472
00:41:01,752 --> 00:41:05,172
-I'm a guy.
-All right! Every waking minute.
473
00:41:20,103 --> 00:41:29,112
Come on, dude!
474
00:41:29,196 --> 00:41:31,031
-Why not?
475
00:41:31,114 --> 00:41:32,574
I've got my reasons.
476
00:41:34,034 --> 00:41:42,793
-Bobby.
-Yeah, Ma?
477
00:41:42,876 --> 00:41:46,922
It represents my disgust
toward the world you grown-ups made,
478
00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:53,512
and I'll never, never, never wash it off.
479
00:41:53,595 --> 00:41:56,431
It's like one of those adorable Smurfs,
isn't it?
480
00:41:57,683 --> 00:41:59,267
I'm going swimming.
481
00:42:06,942 --> 00:42:08,568
What are you looking at?
482
00:42:08,652 --> 00:42:10,654
Is that him, Michael?
483
00:42:10,737 --> 00:42:13,532
Yeah, but now he's acting
as if we never even met.
484
00:42:13,615 --> 00:42:16,618
Oh, Morn, I miss him. What am I gonna do?
485
00:42:16,702 --> 00:42:18,704
Well, I know what I would do.
486
00:42:18,787 --> 00:42:20,330
Mom, it's the middle of the day.
487
00:42:20,414 --> 00:42:22,541
We'd look a little silly
in our pajamas now.
488
00:42:22,624 --> 00:42:32,634
No, not that.
But I like what you're thinking.
489
00:42:35,846 --> 00:42:38,807
And your father is sitting,
let's say, over here.
490
00:42:40,434 --> 00:42:45,856
Okay? Now listen carefully, girls.
This is what I would do.
491
00:43:02,664 --> 00:43:04,082
Nice setup.
492
00:43:09,254 --> 00:43:11,465
It's good to see you again.
493
00:43:13,008 --> 00:43:14,551
Sit. Sit.
494
00:43:15,761 --> 00:43:17,804
So, what were you saying?
495
00:43:20,098 --> 00:43:21,767
I said nice setup.
496
00:43:22,559 --> 00:43:25,437
Thank you. You got a nice setup yourself.
497
00:43:26,188 --> 00:43:39,743
Wow. What a charming remark.
You really know how to talk to a gal.
498
00:43:39,743 --> 00:43:42,120
You really have a lot of nice stuff here.
499
00:43:42,204 --> 00:43:50,587
Yeah, why, thank you.
You know what they say.
500
00:43:56,551 --> 00:43:58,136
So...
501
00:43:59,471 --> 00:44:04,810
how's that little husband of yours?
502
00:44:05,685 --> 00:44:08,188
My name's Annette.
503
00:44:09,940 --> 00:44:11,066
Troy.
504
00:44:13,276 --> 00:44:15,362
Well, Troy, let's cut the small talk.
505
00:44:15,445 --> 00:44:16,530
Okay.
506
00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:35,423
Get me drunk and back to your place?
507
00:44:35,507 --> 00:44:36,508
No?
508
00:44:37,217 --> 00:44:43,974
Toodles.
509
00:44:47,936 --> 00:44:51,565
Now, that's what I would've done
if your father had been there.
510
00:44:51,648 --> 00:44:52,816
It would've driven him nuts.
511
00:44:52,899 --> 00:44:56,695
He would've walked up, punched the guy
and then kissed me.
512
00:44:56,778 --> 00:44:58,488
Possibly with an open mouth.
513
00:44:58,572 --> 00:45:00,240
Are you sure about this?
514
00:45:00,323 --> 00:45:01,825
Well, you were born, weren't you?
515
00:45:03,451 --> 00:45:05,078
Well, Mom's theory was swell,
516
00:45:05,161 --> 00:45:09,124
except Dad wasn't exactly
the two-fisted stud she remembered.
517
00:45:09,207 --> 00:45:10,292
Good morning, tiger.
518
00:45:10,375 --> 00:45:12,961
He hightailed it
straight to Daddy-0's and Connie.
519
00:45:13,044 --> 00:45:15,630
And how is Mr. Excitement
this morning, huh?
520
00:45:17,924 --> 00:45:18,967
You look like...
521
00:45:19,050 --> 00:45:20,343
Connie really dug Dad,
522
00:45:20,427 --> 00:45:22,762
and there wasn't anything
she wouldn't do for him.
523
00:45:22,846 --> 00:45:24,681
Anyway, how are you fixed for bread?
524
00:45:24,764 --> 00:45:26,266
No, no. I'm fine. I'm fine.
525
00:45:26,349 --> 00:45:29,603
-That's bull. Hi, Morn.
-Hi, honey.
526
00:45:29,686 --> 00:45:32,230
"Mom"? "Mom"?
527
00:45:33,189 --> 00:45:34,649
What does that mean, "Mom"?
528
00:45:40,530 --> 00:45:44,242
Well, now wait a second.
If you're his morn, and he's, like, 22,
529
00:45:45,368 --> 00:45:46,995
that means he could be my...
530
00:45:48,246 --> 00:45:50,999
Get real. We never did anything.
531
00:45:51,082 --> 00:45:53,460
-We didn't?
-No.
532
00:45:53,543 --> 00:45:54,711
I thought we did.
533
00:45:55,670 --> 00:46:02,761
You mean, you can't remember
if we did anything or not?
534
00:46:02,761 --> 00:46:05,305
I had Michael with my first husband, Spud.
535
00:46:05,388 --> 00:46:06,431
Spud?
536
00:46:06,514 --> 00:46:07,891
Spud.
537
00:46:07,974 --> 00:46:09,351
Spud.
538
00:46:10,727 --> 00:46:13,772
Spud! Spud.
539
00:46:13,855 --> 00:46:15,857
Oh, geez. Spud?
540
00:46:15,941 --> 00:46:18,568
Yes, and he was not square.
541
00:46:19,194 --> 00:46:24,908
Spud? Oh, no.
You didn't marry Spud, did you?
542
00:46:24,991 --> 00:46:28,119
What? No, no, no. I didn't mean that.
No, no, no. Forgive me.
543
00:46:28,203 --> 00:46:30,997
So, you got this cherry bomb, right?
544
00:46:31,998 --> 00:46:34,167
But you don't want to be around
when it goes off,
545
00:46:34,250 --> 00:46:36,294
'cause then you'll get blamed, right?
546
00:46:36,378 --> 00:46:38,630
Right?
Right!
547
00:46:40,006 --> 00:46:43,301
So dig. You take this baby,
548
00:46:43,385 --> 00:46:45,971
and you put this sucker
in the women's john.
549
00:46:52,978 --> 00:46:54,854
Chicks flying everywhere.
550
00:46:56,940 --> 00:46:59,943
You are a true genius.
551
00:47:00,026 --> 00:47:01,569
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
552
00:47:01,653 --> 00:47:02,737
I know that.
553
00:47:03,363 --> 00:47:07,117
So what do you say we do some damage
to my dad's American Express card?
554
00:47:08,785 --> 00:47:10,745
-All right.
-Yeah.
555
00:47:10,829 --> 00:47:12,497
I really like this kid.
556
00:47:12,580 --> 00:47:14,916
Now, look, man, I'm gonna do it.
557
00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:17,752
I'm gonna tell Sandi I was an idiot
and apologize.
558
00:47:17,836 --> 00:47:21,423
-No.
-Michael, Michael, Michael, wait a minute!
559
00:47:21,506 --> 00:47:23,591
You're making a bigger mistake.
560
00:47:23,675 --> 00:47:25,552
Okay. So what do I do?
561
00:47:25,635 --> 00:47:34,894
Yeah, what's he gonna do?
562
00:47:34,978 --> 00:47:40,817
While they're sitting there
depressed and miserable.
563
00:47:41,109 --> 00:47:43,611
Do you girls know how to Jamaica Ska?
564
00:47:44,404 --> 00:47:45,697
Jamaica what?
565
00:47:45,780 --> 00:47:49,743
Yeah, sure, Annette.
It's a required course at our college.
566
00:47:49,826 --> 00:48:08,845
Well, do you know how to Jamaica Ska?
567
00:48:08,845 --> 00:48:10,221
Ska, Ska, Ska
568
00:48:12,098 --> 00:48:13,933
Jamaica Ska
569
00:48:15,477 --> 00:48:17,395
Ska, Ska, Ska
570
00:48:18,897 --> 00:48:26,237
Do the Ska
571
00:48:26,321 --> 00:48:50,095
Not everybody can do the twist
572
00:48:50,178 --> 00:48:51,471
Now bow your head
573
00:48:53,431 --> 00:48:54,891
And swing your arms
574
00:48:57,102 --> 00:48:58,353
Shake your hips
575
00:49:00,355 --> 00:49:01,439
Now do a dip
576
00:49:03,650 --> 00:49:05,026
Ska, Ska, Ska
577
00:49:06,736 --> 00:49:08,530
Jamaica Ska
578
00:49:10,281 --> 00:49:11,991
Ska, Ska, Ska
579
00:49:25,964 --> 00:49:27,632
Yeah!
580
00:49:28,466 --> 00:49:29,884
Yeah!
581
00:49:31,010 --> 00:49:32,804
Now bow your head
582
00:49:34,180 --> 00:49:41,354
-And swing your arms
-We've got it
583
00:49:41,437 --> 00:49:44,440
-Now do a dip
-Uh-huh, uh-huh
584
00:49:44,524 --> 00:49:46,192
Ska, Ska, Ska
585
00:49:47,902 --> 00:49:49,195
Jamaica Ska
586
00:49:51,322 --> 00:49:53,158
Ska, Ska, Ska
587
00:49:54,701 --> 00:49:55,702
Do the Ska
588
00:49:55,785 --> 00:49:56,953
Wait, where are you going?
589
00:49:58,246 --> 00:50:00,123
We love you, Annette!
590
00:50:00,206 --> 00:50:07,213
Not many people can cha-cha-cha
591
00:50:07,297 --> 00:50:10,425
But everybody can do the Ska
592
00:50:10,508 --> 00:50:13,511
It's a new dance that goes like this
593
00:50:16,890 --> 00:50:18,183
Jamaica Ska
594
00:50:20,185 --> 00:50:21,895
Ska, Ska, Ska
595
00:50:23,229 --> 00:50:25,481
You got to do the Ska
596
00:50:26,191 --> 00:50:28,484
-Ska
-Ska, Ska, Ska
597
00:50:30,278 --> 00:50:32,030
Jamaica Ska
598
00:50:33,907 --> 00:50:35,742
Ska, Ska, Ska
599
00:50:35,825 --> 00:50:39,329
Ska, Ska, Ska, Ska, Ska, Ska
600
00:50:39,412 --> 00:50:42,123
-Ska, Ska
-Ska, Ska, Ska
601
00:50:42,207 --> 00:50:47,086
Do it! Do the Ska
You gotta do it, do it, do it, Ska! Yeah!
602
00:50:47,754 --> 00:50:49,255
Ska, Ska, Ska
603
00:50:51,216 --> 00:50:52,717
Do the Ska
604
00:50:54,552 --> 00:50:56,095
Ska, Ska, Ska
605
00:50:58,640 --> 00:51:09,609
When Mom got depressed, she sang.
606
00:51:09,692 --> 00:51:12,320
Hey! You believe this?
607
00:51:19,661 --> 00:51:20,703
All right. Good work.
608
00:51:20,787 --> 00:51:24,999
Yeah, good work? Eighteen bucks?
I got socks that cost more than that.
609
00:51:25,083 --> 00:51:28,544
Really?
I think you got screwed on that deal.
610
00:51:29,212 --> 00:51:31,547
This is what you do for a living, huh?
611
00:51:31,631 --> 00:51:33,591
Hey! All right!
612
00:51:34,425 --> 00:51:38,221
I do this because I love it.
I don't do it for a living.
613
00:51:38,304 --> 00:51:39,472
That's too bad. They're good.
614
00:51:40,223 --> 00:51:41,849
I mean, they look real good.
615
00:51:52,568 --> 00:51:54,362
Well, I'll tell you what,
you'll do all right.
616
00:51:54,445 --> 00:52:00,034
You got some style.
This looks like it's gonna be a beauty.
617
00:52:00,034 --> 00:52:02,328
Bet you these would be easy to sell, huh?
618
00:52:03,037 --> 00:52:05,456
I can just see this.
Marketing, that's what it needs.
619
00:52:05,540 --> 00:52:07,667
California. Then we go nationwide.
620
00:52:07,750 --> 00:52:09,085
Why would I wanna do that?
621
00:52:09,168 --> 00:52:11,671
No, what are you gonna do?
You're going to just give them away?
622
00:52:11,754 --> 00:52:12,964
That's what I do.
623
00:52:13,715 --> 00:52:14,966
I don't believe that.
624
00:52:15,633 --> 00:52:19,721
Hey, listen, if I were a young guy
that was thinking about getting married,
625
00:52:19,804 --> 00:52:21,723
I'd be thinking about
making some extra bucks.
626
00:52:21,806 --> 00:52:26,394
I'd be thinking about maybe a steady job,
instead of being a deadbeat.
627
00:52:26,477 --> 00:52:30,106
Yeah? So I could become
so involved in making money
628
00:52:30,189 --> 00:52:32,233
that I could totally ignore my family?
629
00:52:33,651 --> 00:52:35,194
All right, kid. So you got a point.
630
00:52:35,945 --> 00:52:52,879
But I just think that if you could
make money doing something you love,
631
00:52:52,962 --> 00:52:55,256
-You're asking me about selling?
-Yeah.
632
00:53:01,721 --> 00:53:03,639
We've got long boards,
we've got tall boards.
633
00:53:43,429 --> 00:53:50,269
We gotta get together again.
I'm miserable without her.
634
00:53:50,353 --> 00:53:51,729
You know what we'd do?
635
00:53:51,813 --> 00:54:03,408
We'd throw the biggest bonfire
on the beach,
636
00:54:03,408 --> 00:54:08,663
We'd forgive each other, no worries,
no problems, no winners, no losers.
637
00:54:09,330 --> 00:54:14,085
That's it. That's it. Let's do it.
A big beach bash.
638
00:54:16,045 --> 00:54:25,179
We've tried. The harbormaster we've got
won't allow any permits after dark.
639
00:54:25,263 --> 00:54:31,060
Michael, Michael. I thought
I taught you more about salesmanship.
640
00:54:31,144 --> 00:54:35,022
Tomorrow, we go and see
that Nazi harbormaster-
641
00:54:35,106 --> 00:54:36,649
We'll kick his butt.
642
00:54:37,692 --> 00:54:42,572
No. We see
what a little schmoozing can do.
643
00:55:19,108 --> 00:55:20,693
You're the harbormaster, right?
644
00:55:20,776 --> 00:55:25,198
No, I'm the captain of the Love Boat.
Of course I'm the harbormaster.
645
00:55:25,281 --> 00:55:28,326
And don't tell me
you came here for a party permit.
646
00:55:28,910 --> 00:55:30,077
Can't we get a permit?
647
00:55:30,161 --> 00:55:38,211
I asked you not to tell me that.
648
00:55:38,294 --> 00:55:39,295
Right.
649
00:55:41,756 --> 00:55:53,976
You know, sir,
putting those ships in those bottles,
650
00:55:54,602 --> 00:55:59,941
Wow! Shrewd, and thrifty, too.
May I say you're uncanny?
651
00:56:00,024 --> 00:56:06,697
Yes. Well, I can't stand here all day
and chew the fat.
652
00:56:06,697 --> 00:56:09,450
-Interests. Interests.
-All right. Okay.
653
00:56:11,202 --> 00:56:12,703
So you like sailing, huh?
654
00:56:12,787 --> 00:56:27,051
"Like sailing"? "Like sailing"?
Sailing is my life.
655
00:56:27,134 --> 00:56:28,970
How about a broken oar?
656
00:56:29,053 --> 00:56:34,141
Sir, if I could just convince you
that this party will be good, clean fun--
657
00:56:34,225 --> 00:56:44,902
No, no, no,
there will be no beach parties.
658
00:56:44,986 --> 00:56:48,072
Trying to select the-- the--
659
00:56:48,155 --> 00:56:50,199
Harbormaster of the Year!
660
00:56:50,283 --> 00:56:51,576
I won?
661
00:56:51,659 --> 00:56:53,035
Well...
662
00:56:53,119 --> 00:56:55,830
Missed it by that much.
663
00:56:55,913 --> 00:57:02,169
No. You won! Yeah.
There's a trophy and a ceremony,
664
00:57:02,253 --> 00:57:05,965
and we'd like you to say a few words.
665
00:57:06,048 --> 00:57:08,759
Yes, well,
I would like to say a few words,
666
00:57:08,843 --> 00:57:10,595
but I just don't know what to say, except...
667
00:57:11,220 --> 00:57:12,972
It's about time.
668
00:57:28,279 --> 00:57:29,822
I can't believe it.
669
00:57:29,905 --> 00:57:32,825
I can't believe they'd have a party
and not invite us.
670
00:57:32,908 --> 00:57:35,828
I obviously haven't taught you
a thing, have I?
671
00:57:36,579 --> 00:57:39,206
Well, you did try to teach me
how to get my hair real stiff.
672
00:57:39,290 --> 00:57:41,417
And then there was
that whole peanut butter thing.
673
00:57:41,500 --> 00:57:46,172
No, I'm talking serious men things.
This party is for us.
674
00:57:46,255 --> 00:57:49,634
Your father wants to make up.
He's sending me a signal.
675
00:57:51,135 --> 00:57:53,554
-He burns things?
-Uh-huh.
676
00:58:17,161 --> 00:58:18,829
I'm really glad you guys came.
677
00:58:23,125 --> 00:58:24,710
We haven't been introduced.
678
00:58:24,794 --> 00:58:26,253
I'm Annette.
679
00:58:27,838 --> 00:58:28,923
Sorry.
680
00:58:29,674 --> 00:58:34,929
It's nice to finally meet you, Michael.
681
00:58:34,929 --> 00:58:36,764
So, you surf, Michael?
682
00:58:36,847 --> 00:58:38,182
Yeah.
683
00:58:40,851 --> 00:58:43,729
-Anything else?
-No.
684
00:58:44,397 --> 00:58:45,856
There is something else.
685
00:58:46,774 --> 00:58:53,614
I make and sell surfboards.
Best boards on the beach.
686
00:58:53,698 --> 00:58:56,575
You don't sell them.
That's too straight for you, remember?
687
00:58:56,659 --> 00:58:59,453
Hey, I sold seven of them today.
688
00:59:00,246 --> 00:59:05,000
Yeah. Your dad told me
a little something about responsibility.
689
00:59:07,503 --> 00:59:11,048
If a guy is thinking about
getting married...
690
00:59:14,635 --> 00:59:18,472
You know, I really like
yours and Sandi's place, but...
691
00:59:19,557 --> 00:59:24,562
I think I'm gonna want a little privacy
tonight, so I'm moving out.
692
00:59:24,645 --> 00:59:32,319
You can have the place to yourself.
693
00:59:33,404 --> 00:59:34,739
See you later, Mom.
694
00:59:37,241 --> 00:59:38,284
You...
695
00:59:38,367 --> 00:59:40,369
You look really pretty, Sandi.
696
00:59:41,078 --> 00:59:42,413
Thank you.
697
00:59:42,496 --> 00:59:46,000
Connie, I gotta tell you,
you got a great kid.
698
00:59:46,792 --> 00:59:49,879
Yeah. Yeah, I guess I got lucky, huh?
699
00:59:50,546 --> 00:59:54,091
What lucky? Are you kidding?
Don't give me that bad-girl jazz.
700
00:59:54,175 --> 00:59:56,969
You got a good, clean heart.
You always have.
701
00:59:57,052 --> 00:59:58,262
Well, maybe.
702
00:59:59,096 --> 01:00:02,850
I'll tell you something, I sure would have
soiled it some for you, pal.
703
01:00:04,977 --> 01:00:07,855
If it wasn't Annette, Connie, then you.
704
01:00:08,856 --> 01:00:10,733
-Thanks, Kahuna.
-Give me a smooch.
705
01:00:11,817 --> 01:00:14,111
I'm so glad you came.
706
01:00:22,411 --> 01:00:25,080
How low can you go?
707
01:00:25,164 --> 01:00:27,792
Yeah. How low can you go?
708
01:00:30,586 --> 01:00:32,838
Hiya, hon! Come dance!
709
01:00:33,923 --> 01:00:36,550
You're looking special tonight,
which is quite a coincidence
710
01:00:36,634 --> 01:00:39,345
because I, too,
am looking special tonight.
711
01:00:40,012 --> 01:00:42,348
Troy, do you surf?
712
01:00:43,182 --> 01:00:45,017
Do I surf?
713
01:00:48,479 --> 01:00:52,942
Do I surf? I'm sure.
Does Dolly Parton float?
714
01:00:55,486 --> 01:00:57,780
Does Oprah Winfrey eat?
715
01:00:57,863 --> 01:01:00,658
Does Michael Jackson have flammable hair?
716
01:01:00,741 --> 01:01:02,159
Do you ever shut up?
717
01:01:06,038 --> 01:01:07,164
Come on.
718
01:01:27,810 --> 01:01:29,562
Watch it now, watch it.
719
01:01:30,980 --> 01:01:33,941
Well, this is a terrific turnout
you've got here.
720
01:01:36,151 --> 01:01:39,405
-What time does the ceremony begin?
-What ceremony?
721
01:01:45,786 --> 01:01:47,288
Absolutely correct.
722
01:01:47,913 --> 01:01:49,081
You better tell him.
723
01:01:49,915 --> 01:01:51,417
Again with the foot.
724
01:01:51,500 --> 01:01:53,377
Bridgette. Bridgette. Get Bridgette.
725
01:01:54,169 --> 01:01:57,256
Well, now, about the ceremony,
when does it begin?
726
01:01:57,339 --> 01:01:58,966
Well, you see, what happened...
727
01:01:59,675 --> 01:02:01,260
There is no ceremony.
728
01:02:01,343 --> 01:02:16,400
-Well, exactly--
-No trophy?
729
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:18,611
-This helps.
730
01:02:18,694 --> 01:02:21,780
I'm Bridgette,
and you're too sexy for words.
731
01:02:21,864 --> 01:02:27,328
Why don't we go somewhere dark and quiet,
but not too far for me to scream for help.
732
01:02:27,411 --> 01:02:30,289
She's got asthma.
Well, what the hell, it's late.
733
01:03:18,003 --> 01:03:21,966
After all that surfing,
her hair perfectly dry.
734
01:03:22,049 --> 01:03:23,342
I made a bonfire,
735
01:03:23,425 --> 01:03:26,136
and you're supposed to know
what it means when I burn stuff.
736
01:03:26,220 --> 01:03:29,932
I know what it means,
and I thought you know what it means too.
737
01:03:30,015 --> 01:03:32,059
Until I saw you hugging that woman again.
738
01:03:32,142 --> 01:03:39,775
Oh, come on. I wanna talk to you.
739
01:03:40,734 --> 01:03:44,029
I don't think the lady
wants to go with you.
740
01:03:44,113 --> 01:03:46,198
Shorty? You're calling me shorty?
741
01:03:47,449 --> 01:03:48,826
You're in for a lot of trouble.
742
01:03:48,909 --> 01:03:50,285
I'm in a lot of trouble?
743
01:03:50,953 --> 01:03:52,329
Your shoelace is untied.
744
01:03:59,795 --> 01:04:04,925
How very, very mature. You are so stupid!
745
01:04:06,802 --> 01:04:09,096
Stupid? You wanna talk stupid?
746
01:04:09,179 --> 01:04:11,557
He's not even wearing shoes!
747
01:04:20,816 --> 01:04:25,320
All right. That's it. I've had enough.
You can have him if you want him.
748
01:04:26,780 --> 01:04:29,491
I'd like to have him,
but I do have one rule, you know.
749
01:04:29,575 --> 01:04:31,827
I don't want anybody that doesn't want me.
750
01:04:31,910 --> 01:04:35,039
Oh, please. Every time I turn around,
751
01:04:35,122 --> 01:04:38,333
he's got you cornered
like a marine on R & R.
752
01:04:38,417 --> 01:04:42,838
Nettie, please. You know as well as I do,
I never get the good guy.
753
01:04:42,921 --> 01:04:54,308
I'm the bad girl, remember?
754
01:04:54,391 --> 01:04:56,685
And if I were a goody two-shoes like you,
755
01:04:56,769 --> 01:05:04,651
I would get my ass over there
and get that guy.
756
01:05:06,236 --> 01:05:07,613
Impossible.
757
01:05:08,530 --> 01:05:13,660
But I'll tell you something.
758
01:05:24,129 --> 01:05:26,632
You're looking pretty gloomy there, tiger.
759
01:05:29,343 --> 01:05:32,346
Well, from stupid to gloomy,
at least it's a step up.
760
01:05:33,305 --> 01:05:39,728
Come on, honey. According to my scorecard,
we're just about even now.
761
01:05:46,360 --> 01:05:47,528
No losers?
762
01:05:49,947 --> 01:05:51,031
Annette.
763
01:05:52,199 --> 01:05:57,329
You know, I've been thinking about us.
All the good times we used to have here.
764
01:05:58,122 --> 01:06:02,126
I mean, we used to have
a hell of a lot of fun on this beach.
765
01:06:02,209 --> 01:06:05,379
Honey, we still can.
766
01:06:14,680 --> 01:06:30,612
Well, come on, you guys.
That's enough. The show is over.
767
01:06:30,612 --> 01:06:33,198
Well, everybody's heard about the bird
768
01:06:33,282 --> 01:06:35,242
Bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
769
01:06:35,325 --> 01:06:37,536
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
770
01:06:37,619 --> 01:06:40,080
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
771
01:06:40,164 --> 01:06:42,416
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word
772
01:06:42,499 --> 01:06:44,877
Well, the bird, bird
The bird is the word
773
01:06:44,960 --> 01:06:47,045
Well, the bird, bird
The bird is the word
774
01:06:47,129 --> 01:06:49,631
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
775
01:06:49,715 --> 01:06:52,092
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
776
01:06:52,176 --> 01:06:54,469
Well, the bird, bird
The bird is the word
777
01:06:54,553 --> 01:06:56,722
Well, don't you know about the bird?
778
01:06:56,805 --> 01:06:59,224
Well, everybody knows
That the bird is the word
779
01:06:59,308 --> 01:07:01,935
Well, the bird, bird
The bird is the word, well
780
01:07:03,187 --> 01:07:04,438
Surf in' bird
781
01:07:11,612 --> 01:07:18,577
Bird, bird, bird
The bird is the word
782
01:07:18,660 --> 01:07:20,871
Well, the bird, bird, bird
The bird is the word
783
01:07:20,954 --> 01:07:25,709
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
784
01:07:25,792 --> 01:07:28,086
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
785
01:07:28,170 --> 01:07:30,464
Well, the bird, bird, bird
Well, the bird is the word
786
01:07:30,547 --> 01:07:32,883
Well, the bird, bird, bird
The bird is the word
787
01:07:32,966 --> 01:07:37,638
Well, don't you know about the bird?
Well, everybody's talking about the bird
788
01:07:37,721 --> 01:07:40,182
Well, the bird, the bird
It's for sure the word
789
01:08:11,296 --> 01:08:12,839
Come on, what's the word?
790
01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:15,259
Everybody!
791
01:08:16,593 --> 01:08:18,428
Clap your hands!
792
01:08:23,308 --> 01:08:24,851
Gnarly!
793
01:08:25,811 --> 01:08:27,062
Radical!
794
01:08:28,730 --> 01:08:30,774
Surf in' bird!
795
01:08:31,692 --> 01:08:32,901
That's the word!
796
01:08:33,944 --> 01:08:35,237
Yeah!
797
01:08:52,671 --> 01:08:53,880
Hang ten!
798
01:08:54,881 --> 01:08:56,633
Wipeout!
799
01:08:56,717 --> 01:08:59,219
Let's hang nine!
800
01:08:59,303 --> 01:09:05,809
Tubular!
801
01:09:11,106 --> 01:09:12,816
Goodbye, Pee-wee!
802
01:09:15,819 --> 01:09:18,780
Wipeout!
803
01:09:19,740 --> 01:09:20,824
Boy, great dinner.
804
01:09:20,907 --> 01:09:27,497
Uh-oh. Here we go again.
Dinner, and now the surf story.
805
01:09:27,581 --> 01:09:31,460
All the time you've been here,
you haven't been in the ocean once.
806
01:09:31,543 --> 01:09:34,296
-Yeah, why not?
-No, I don't go in the ocean anymore.
807
01:09:34,379 --> 01:09:36,506
Yeah, but you were
the hottest surfer on the beach.
808
01:09:36,590 --> 01:09:39,176
I mean, you were the Big Caboose.
809
01:09:39,259 --> 01:09:40,469
Kahuna.
810
01:09:40,552 --> 01:09:44,264
Which is extra cool, 'cause you look like
an Italian loan shark.
811
01:09:44,348 --> 01:09:46,558
Well, it doesn't make any sense.
812
01:09:46,641 --> 01:09:48,894
Nobody just decides not to surf again.
813
01:09:49,519 --> 01:09:58,403
It's like deciding not to breathe anymore.
814
01:09:58,403 --> 01:09:59,654
All right, I Will.
815
01:10:01,448 --> 01:10:08,246
I know all of you have heard of
the Humunga Cowabunga from down unda.
816
01:10:08,330 --> 01:10:09,748
No!
817
01:10:10,374 --> 01:10:13,293
No? Oh, well, let me tell you what it is.
818
01:10:13,960 --> 01:10:18,590
It's this huge, enormous wave
that rolls in from Australia
819
01:10:18,673 --> 01:10:21,093
-and it's so big that--
-Annette, Annette, Annette.
820
01:10:22,552 --> 01:10:24,012
This is my story.
821
01:10:24,096 --> 01:10:29,476
And you tell it well. Just speed it up.
822
01:10:30,060 --> 01:10:42,155
Now, you see, this one particular day,
I'm out in the break.
823
01:10:42,239 --> 01:10:56,461
I hear this rumble.
I look 0 ver my shoulder,
824
01:10:56,545 --> 01:11:01,049
Smash! It's the biggest wipe out
anyone's ever seen.
825
01:11:01,133 --> 01:11:11,560
He washes up on the beach
and we thought he was dead.
826
01:11:11,643 --> 01:11:12,978
End of story.
827
01:11:14,521 --> 01:11:17,899
Thanks, honey. I think they get the point.
828
01:11:18,608 --> 01:11:21,653
But that's because you tell it so well.
829
01:11:42,090 --> 01:11:44,342
Eat sand, lame-0's!
830
01:11:44,426 --> 01:11:47,429
Bobby, you get down from there
right this instant.
831
01:11:47,512 --> 01:11:52,184
My name isn't Bobby anymore.
I've got my gang name. Call me Surly.
832
01:11:52,767 --> 01:12:01,610
Shirley? Your name is Shirley?
Bobby is a tougher name than Shirley.
833
01:12:01,693 --> 01:12:06,490
God! Man, I'm changing my gang name.
My new gang name is...
834
01:12:10,827 --> 01:12:13,830
Knife. Call me Knife.
835
01:12:13,914 --> 01:12:16,875
Nice? You want us to call you Nice?
836
01:12:17,501 --> 01:12:20,712
Okay! Nice hairstyle, Nice.
837
01:12:21,546 --> 01:12:24,257
It's not Nice! It's not Nice!
838
01:12:25,383 --> 01:12:27,594
Man, just forget it. Call me Bobby.
839
01:12:27,677 --> 01:12:30,514
Bobby, you're getting mixed up
with the wrong crowd here.
840
01:12:31,348 --> 01:12:34,351
-He's more than mixed up with us.
-Yeah, that's right.
841
01:12:34,434 --> 01:12:37,354
I'm president of the wrong crowd.
842
01:12:37,437 --> 01:12:38,813
Yeah, we elected him this morning
843
01:12:38,897 --> 01:12:42,025
after we bought these bikes
with your credit card.
844
01:12:42,108 --> 01:12:43,568
Yeah!
845
01:12:45,028 --> 01:12:46,279
Hey, Zed...
846
01:12:47,364 --> 01:12:48,990
you're not invited to this party.
847
01:12:49,074 --> 01:13:11,304
Well, that's why I'm here, septic breath.
848
01:13:11,388 --> 01:13:14,891
Why don't we settle it like we used to do
back in the good ol' days, huh?
849
01:13:14,975 --> 01:13:17,227
-Pajama party?
-We'll surf for it.
850
01:13:17,310 --> 01:13:19,521
-Winner takes the beach.
-Yeah!
851
01:13:19,604 --> 01:13:21,940
-You got it!
-You get your best guy...
852
01:13:22,023 --> 01:13:36,538
-That's me.
-Yeah!
853
01:13:36,621 --> 01:13:38,540
I'm gonna thrash your butt.
854
01:13:38,623 --> 01:13:44,254
Yeah? Well, I'll tell you what.
Until then, this is our beach.
855
01:13:44,337 --> 01:13:45,797
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
856
01:13:45,880 --> 01:13:48,592
-Let's ride, gang!
-Yeah!
857
01:13:56,182 --> 01:13:57,559
Bundle up!
858
01:14:00,228 --> 01:14:01,688
Mike.
859
01:14:01,771 --> 01:14:04,274
Michael, you've gotta win big tomorrow.
860
01:14:06,067 --> 01:14:07,277
What's the matter?
861
01:14:10,655 --> 01:14:11,781
That must hurt.
862
01:14:12,616 --> 01:14:13,908
It does!
863
01:14:23,335 --> 01:14:27,464
And the contestants are gonna be judged
by style and originality.
864
01:14:28,048 --> 01:15:08,922
The winner and their friends are gonna
have the right to the entire beach.
865
01:15:08,922 --> 01:15:11,007
Yeah-- Yeah!
866
01:15:17,847 --> 01:15:20,558
Zed! Zed! Zed! Zed!
867
01:15:20,642 --> 01:15:23,645
Zed! Zed! Zed! Zed!
868
01:15:39,994 --> 01:15:44,082
You forgot ugly, lazy and disrespectful.
869
01:15:44,165 --> 01:15:46,835
Yeah! Yeah!
870
01:15:51,798 --> 01:15:53,133
Where's Michael?
871
01:15:53,216 --> 01:15:58,805
Well, due to an unfortunate circumstance,
you're going to be competing with Robin.
872
01:16:03,268 --> 01:16:04,894
Robin?
873
01:16:04,978 --> 01:16:06,646
She can't even swim!
874
01:16:11,443 --> 01:16:12,527
Go figure.
875
01:16:13,319 --> 01:16:17,073
This is gonna be
a very, very short contest.
876
01:16:17,157 --> 01:16:18,199
Yeah!
877
01:16:20,452 --> 01:16:25,832
No, it won't.
878
01:16:25,915 --> 01:16:27,584
Yeah!
879
01:16:33,006 --> 01:16:34,257
Yeah!
880
01:16:35,216 --> 01:16:39,929
You're putting me on.
You're not a surfer anymore.
881
01:16:40,013 --> 01:16:43,183
You live in Ohio. You sell Fords.
882
01:16:43,266 --> 01:16:45,810
What are you gonna ride, a Mustang?
883
01:16:47,604 --> 01:16:49,022
Oh, yeah?
884
01:16:50,064 --> 01:16:52,108
Well, how about this?
885
01:16:52,192 --> 01:16:54,402
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
886
01:16:54,486 --> 01:16:56,988
That's not a board. It's a pier!
887
01:17:02,535 --> 01:17:05,330
Dad, you'll get killed on that. A lot.
888
01:17:05,413 --> 01:17:11,711
Bobby, get over here now.
889
01:17:13,880 --> 01:17:15,924
Now, sit down and shut up.
890
01:17:16,925 --> 01:17:23,807
You know, you're crazy, old man.
891
01:17:23,890 --> 01:17:28,269
The primo surfer in the whole state,
the Big Kahuna.
892
01:17:28,353 --> 01:17:30,980
He's ridden waves
that you wouldn't photograph.
893
01:17:31,064 --> 01:17:34,734
If he does this today,
it'll give him back his pride,
894
01:17:34,818 --> 01:17:44,077
his courage, the respect of his son,
and put the zip back in his marriage.
895
01:17:44,160 --> 01:17:47,789
Okay. Let's see how good you really are.
896
01:17:47,872 --> 01:17:49,123
All right!
897
01:17:50,041 --> 01:17:52,752
Let the games begin!
898
01:18:09,227 --> 01:18:13,481
All I need is a nice few waves out there
that are nice and quiet and--
899
01:18:16,234 --> 01:18:17,986
I gotta go home.
900
01:18:18,069 --> 01:18:22,115
Oh, no! You can do it. I know you can.
901
01:18:24,617 --> 01:18:27,662
-Go get 'em, Kahuna.
-Hey, wait up!
902
01:18:27,745 --> 01:18:28,746
Excuse us.
903
01:18:28,830 --> 01:18:30,498
-Hey.
-Careful.
904
01:18:30,582 --> 01:18:33,042
Listen, you gotta remember,
905
01:18:33,126 --> 01:18:36,796
stay in your crouch
until the wave tells you to get up.
906
01:18:36,880 --> 01:18:39,924
And lead the board.
Don't let the board lead you.
907
01:18:42,260 --> 01:18:46,639
And I promise, I'll raise Bobby
as if he were my own son.
908
01:18:47,724 --> 01:18:48,975
Go get 'em, Dad.
909
01:18:50,351 --> 01:18:51,519
Kahuna!
910
01:18:51,603 --> 01:18:55,315
Kahuna! Kahuna! Kahuna! Kahuna!
911
01:18:55,398 --> 01:19:01,070
Kahuna! Kahuna! Kahuna! Kahuna!
912
01:19:22,759 --> 01:19:59,879
Stay in your pouch. Stay in your crouch.
Get to the close to the board.
913
01:19:59,879 --> 01:20:02,173
Kahuna! Kahuna! Kahuna!
914
01:20:07,762 --> 01:20:10,306
I guess this was a bad idea.
915
01:20:53,307 --> 01:20:54,809
Well, Jerry, it was well-performed.
916
01:20:54,892 --> 01:20:57,478
It moved quickly,
and the ending was exciting and original.
917
01:20:57,562 --> 01:20:59,439
I give it an eight. Thumbs up.
918
01:20:59,522 --> 01:21:02,608
Well, as usual, Tony, I totally disagree.
919
01:21:02,692 --> 01:21:06,988
I found the entire ride
stiff and uninspired.
920
01:21:07,071 --> 01:21:09,699
The ending was anticlimactic.
921
01:21:09,782 --> 01:21:13,786
I gave it a six. Thumbs down.
It made me want to leave the beach.
922
01:21:50,114 --> 01:21:53,701
If he won't take a wave, we can't win.
923
01:21:54,452 --> 01:21:58,331
Well, maybe he's just waiting
for a bigger one.
924
01:21:58,873 --> 01:22:01,209
-Yeah.
-Yeah. Yeah, that's it.
925
01:22:01,292 --> 01:22:04,337
-Yeah. Yeah.
-Yeah.
926
01:22:29,654 --> 01:22:31,072
Mom, what is it?
927
01:22:31,864 --> 01:22:34,659
It's the Humunga Cowabunga...
928
01:22:34,742 --> 01:22:36,327
From down unda.
929
01:22:36,410 --> 01:22:38,204
Oh, no!
930
01:22:44,544 --> 01:22:51,717
Dude! Come in! You're gonna get messed up!
931
01:22:51,801 --> 01:22:55,429
Dude, you're crazy!
You're gonna get killed!
932
01:22:55,513 --> 01:22:57,014
I've gotta go after him!
933
01:22:57,098 --> 01:22:58,641
No, Michael, you can't!
934
01:22:58,724 --> 01:22:59,851
He'll get wiped.
935
01:22:59,934 --> 01:23:01,978
But I'm the reason he's out there!
936
01:23:02,061 --> 01:23:03,855
Somebody do something!
937
01:23:11,529 --> 01:23:13,698
No!
938
01:23:23,916 --> 01:23:51,527
It's too late.
939
01:23:51,527 --> 01:23:52,862
Go, Pop, go!
940
01:23:57,867 --> 01:24:00,203
Come on, Dad! Come on!
941
01:24:12,173 --> 01:24:14,717
Yeah! Yeah!
942
01:24:19,889 --> 01:24:22,475
Wow! Not bad!
943
01:24:24,644 --> 01:24:25,937
All right!
944
01:24:26,896 --> 01:24:28,356
All right!
945
01:24:46,624 --> 01:24:49,752
Now, that's the kind of ride we'd hoped
for the Big Kahuna on his comeback.
946
01:24:49,835 --> 01:24:59,303
I give that ride an unqualified ten.
947
01:24:59,303 --> 01:25:05,434
Well, folks, there you have it.
The winner, and still the Big Crapola!
948
01:25:05,518 --> 01:25:10,940
Kahuna!
949
01:25:10,940 --> 01:25:12,149
Kahuna!
950
01:25:12,233 --> 01:25:16,153
Gee, Dad turned out to be pretty cool
and was my new hero.
951
01:25:16,737 --> 01:25:21,951
Mom was even happier than usual,
952
01:25:23,452 --> 01:25:25,997
I decided the hair helmet
was the look for me.
953
01:25:26,080 --> 01:25:27,248
Thank you!
954
01:25:30,167 --> 01:25:33,170
And who said you can never go home again?
955
01:25:33,254 --> 01:25:34,672
It wasn't me.
956
01:25:56,235 --> 01:26:03,242
-All right, go! Oh, yeah!
-All right, Dad!
957
01:26:04,368 --> 01:26:08,122
Will it be as good as yesterday?
958
01:26:08,205 --> 01:26:11,792
I just look in your direction
959
01:26:11,876 --> 01:26:15,546
Then I'm glad for what we have today
960
01:26:15,629 --> 01:26:19,216
What I like about a love song
961
01:26:19,300 --> 01:26:23,095
Is that you never can wear it out
962
01:26:23,179 --> 01:26:30,478
You and I are like a love song
963
01:26:30,561 --> 01:26:34,023
So we go on forever
964
01:26:34,106 --> 01:26:36,734
So let the world go crazy...
965
01:26:36,817 --> 01:26:39,612
We never had this much fun on the island.
966
01:26:39,695 --> 01:26:41,822
I don't suppose
you wanna hear about it, huh?
967
01:26:41,906 --> 01:26:44,784
I'd love to. It sounds fascinating.
968
01:26:44,867 --> 01:26:46,786
Forever
969
01:26:46,869 --> 01:26:48,329
And again and again
970
01:26:50,998 --> 01:26:55,795
Some things live forever
971
01:26:58,255 --> 01:27:00,216
We live on
972
01:27:15,773 --> 01:27:18,609
We have made a million memories
973
01:27:19,652 --> 01:27:25,866
Each a shining diamond in my mind
974
01:27:27,118 --> 01:27:30,746
Are the memories that we're gonna find
975
01:27:30,830 --> 01:27:34,583
So we go on forever
976
01:27:34,667 --> 01:27:35,960
So let the world go...
977
01:27:36,043 --> 01:27:40,881
So, that's the whole story.
I just thank God it's all over.
978
01:27:40,965 --> 01:27:43,050
Well, I know I just met you,
but I love you.
979
01:27:43,134 --> 01:27:45,136
Would you be my main squeeze?
980
01:27:45,219 --> 01:27:47,096
I never thought you'd ask!
981
01:27:48,973 --> 01:27:50,474
We've got to shove off, little buddy.
982
01:27:50,558 --> 01:27:52,560
Oh, no, not you! Not now!
983
01:27:52,643 --> 01:27:54,395
I'm sorry. It's time to go.
984
01:27:54,478 --> 01:27:57,982
Now, we'll be back real soon.
It's only a three-hour tour.
985
01:27:58,065 --> 01:28:00,443
It's never a three-hour tour.
986
01:28:00,526 --> 01:28:08,492
-Come on, little buddy, let's go!
-No!
987
01:28:08,576 --> 01:28:17,001
I still remember
988
01:28:17,835 --> 01:28:20,921
Are we the corniest couple
you've ever seen, or what?
70708
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