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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,652 --> 00:00:12,589 Danny, don't splash me! 2 00:00:12,589 --> 00:00:13,657 Stop. I'm getting wet. 3 00:00:13,657 --> 00:00:17,460 That's the idea. 4 00:00:18,295 --> 00:00:20,063 - Stop it. - Hi, sweetie. 5 00:00:20,063 --> 00:00:21,298 Oh, come on! 6 00:00:21,298 --> 00:00:23,266 Come on, let's go back to my place. 7 00:00:23,266 --> 00:00:24,868 Maybe we should wait. 8 00:00:24,868 --> 00:00:26,770 Wait, schmait! 9 00:00:28,471 --> 00:00:30,006 These two people are not married, 10 00:00:30,006 --> 00:00:32,342 and they're going to have premarital sex. 11 00:00:32,342 --> 00:00:34,010 You could go to hell for that. 12 00:00:34,010 --> 00:00:35,579 All right, that's it. You're not allowed 13 00:00:35,579 --> 00:00:37,214 to watch this show anymore. 14 00:00:37,214 --> 00:00:40,016 It inspires urges that are... 15 00:00:40,016 --> 00:00:43,420 - wrong and bad. - Let's go to your place. 16 00:00:43,420 --> 00:00:44,187 Groovy! 17 00:00:44,187 --> 00:00:46,389 You could go to hell for those urges. 18 00:00:50,126 --> 00:00:52,596 In hell, there is a fire 19 00:00:52,596 --> 00:00:56,633 that will lap at you for all eternity. 20 00:00:56,633 --> 00:00:58,568 You gotta decide... 21 00:00:58,568 --> 00:01:03,373 Do you want to go to heaven, or do you wanna go to hell? 22 00:01:07,210 --> 00:01:10,413 Yeah. You a bad girl? Huh? You a bad girl? 23 00:01:10,413 --> 00:01:12,015 - I'm a bad girl. - Yeah! 24 00:01:12,015 --> 00:01:14,584 You're a dirty little slut, huh? Dirty little slut, 25 00:01:14,584 --> 00:01:15,785 - yeah. - Um, yes. 26 00:01:15,785 --> 00:01:16,753 Say it. Say you're a dirty slut. 27 00:01:16,753 --> 00:01:19,890 - I'm a dirty slut. - Yeah, you're a dirty slut! 28 00:01:29,332 --> 00:01:31,701 Oh. Hmm. 29 00:01:32,035 --> 00:01:35,338 Hmm. Hmm. 30 00:01:35,805 --> 00:01:37,274 Okay. 31 00:01:37,707 --> 00:01:39,109 Oh. 32 00:01:42,712 --> 00:01:43,280 Mm. 33 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:45,782 Why do you always call me a dirty little slut? 34 00:01:45,782 --> 00:01:46,816 Ah. 35 00:01:46,816 --> 00:01:49,219 Come on. You love it. 36 00:01:49,219 --> 00:01:50,921 I like having sex on a bed. 37 00:01:50,921 --> 00:01:53,256 Is this because maybe you're, uh, you're jealous 38 00:01:53,256 --> 00:01:54,557 that I'm more successful than you? 39 00:01:54,557 --> 00:01:55,892 Mr. Brock, 40 00:01:55,892 --> 00:01:56,893 we're ready for you onstage. 41 00:01:56,893 --> 00:02:00,196 Peter, you have been in one great movie after another. 42 00:02:00,196 --> 00:02:02,032 Walk me through your process. 43 00:02:02,032 --> 00:02:04,100 How do you prepare for this? 44 00:02:04,367 --> 00:02:06,937 I tell you, I play a lot of action heroes. 45 00:02:06,937 --> 00:02:07,837 Um... 46 00:02:07,837 --> 00:02:09,472 and in those-- in those movies, 47 00:02:09,472 --> 00:02:12,008 I have heavy artillery. I have guns, 48 00:02:12,008 --> 00:02:13,443 okay? 49 00:02:14,277 --> 00:02:16,413 I have a gun on me right now. 50 00:02:16,613 --> 00:02:18,615 Not physically, in the physical sense. 51 00:02:18,615 --> 00:02:21,017 I put it on the table earlier. It's right here. 52 00:02:21,017 --> 00:02:22,118 Imagine it, okay? 53 00:02:22,118 --> 00:02:25,055 - It's an emotional gun for me. - Right. 54 00:02:25,055 --> 00:02:26,723 This gun's here... 55 00:02:26,957 --> 00:02:27,691 all the time. 56 00:02:27,691 --> 00:02:30,627 Sometimes I put it in my pocket, sometimes I put it in my... 57 00:02:30,627 --> 00:02:32,395 That's how I prepare. I'm always ready. 58 00:02:32,395 --> 00:02:35,598 I'm always the action hero. Bang! Not real. 59 00:02:35,598 --> 00:02:37,133 But real. 60 00:02:37,267 --> 00:02:38,935 - Uh-- - I'll do it. 61 00:02:38,935 --> 00:02:40,403 Don't do it. 62 00:02:40,403 --> 00:02:41,171 I won't do it. 63 00:02:41,171 --> 00:02:42,939 You've been doing this for years, and years and years. 64 00:02:42,939 --> 00:02:45,241 Certainly, you've heard some of the talk on the streets. 65 00:02:45,241 --> 00:02:47,577 People say that Peter is just a tough guy, 66 00:02:47,577 --> 00:02:50,280 a hard guy to work with. How do you respond to that? 67 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:54,584 Yeah, Napoleon died exiled on an island of-- of leprosy. 68 00:02:54,584 --> 00:02:55,618 That's-- that's true. 69 00:02:55,618 --> 00:02:56,653 - That's history. - Yeah. 70 00:02:56,653 --> 00:02:59,856 Jesus died on the cross, you know? 71 00:02:59,923 --> 00:03:01,491 Um, visionaries die 72 00:03:01,491 --> 00:03:04,494 sometimes quicker than non-visionaries. 73 00:03:04,494 --> 00:03:05,328 You're a visionary? 74 00:03:05,328 --> 00:03:06,596 Thank you. But I'm not saying-- 75 00:03:06,596 --> 00:03:08,064 - Oh, you're asking. I think... - It was a question. 76 00:03:08,064 --> 00:03:10,433 um, I think that's up for kinda the press to decide, 77 00:03:10,433 --> 00:03:11,401 and I think that bloggers, 78 00:03:11,401 --> 00:03:13,403 and people who write physical magazines 79 00:03:13,403 --> 00:03:14,704 have said I was a-- a visionary. 80 00:03:14,704 --> 00:03:16,406 People have-- have tweeted me about that. 81 00:03:16,406 --> 00:03:18,008 You know, you made Bros Before Hos. 82 00:03:18,008 --> 00:03:19,275 Why don't you make the female version? 83 00:03:19,275 --> 00:03:21,344 I-- I wrote a great script. It's called Chicks Before Dicks. 84 00:03:21,344 --> 00:03:23,146 - Did you read it? - Uh, look, Boo Boo, 85 00:03:23,146 --> 00:03:24,514 you have all the talent. You really do. 86 00:03:24,514 --> 00:03:25,682 And I'm the one that discovered you 87 00:03:25,682 --> 00:03:27,050 and gave you your big break, right? 88 00:03:27,050 --> 00:03:28,084 - Yeah. - Yeah, I promoted you 89 00:03:28,084 --> 00:03:29,786 - to be my D girl, right? - I want to be a writer. 90 00:03:29,786 --> 00:03:31,488 I know you want to be a writer, and in due time. 91 00:03:31,488 --> 00:03:34,157 Really. Your writing is great. It's fresh and very unique. 92 00:03:34,157 --> 00:03:35,191 But you're bogging yourself down 93 00:03:35,191 --> 00:03:36,993 talking about stupid shit. You know what? You-- 94 00:03:36,993 --> 00:03:39,195 Nobody wants to hear about women's stories, all right? 95 00:03:39,195 --> 00:03:41,131 If you want to make a film, you got to talk about a man. 96 00:03:41,131 --> 00:03:42,699 You gotta write about a man. That's what you have to do. 97 00:03:42,699 --> 00:03:44,634 Well, can you read my script? It's called The Year of My Yoni. 98 00:03:44,634 --> 00:03:46,403 It's about a woman who goes on a spiritual quest 99 00:03:46,403 --> 00:03:48,371 to find happiness and to learn about her yoni. 100 00:03:48,371 --> 00:03:49,572 Yoni? I don't even know what that is. 101 00:03:49,572 --> 00:03:51,174 Is that, like, a new way of saying "vagina"? 102 00:03:51,174 --> 00:03:52,575 It sounds like a porno. I'm not into it. 103 00:03:52,575 --> 00:03:55,612 Look, a guy bashing another guy's skull in 104 00:03:55,612 --> 00:03:58,415 with a baseball bat, that's what sells. 105 00:03:59,816 --> 00:04:02,285 Well, I could change the title to The Ultra-Violent Yoni. 106 00:04:02,285 --> 00:04:04,587 You know, that's a good start. You could put more violence 107 00:04:04,587 --> 00:04:05,789 in your script, that'd definitely get 108 00:04:05,789 --> 00:04:07,123 a better chance of getting it made. Um, 109 00:04:07,123 --> 00:04:08,925 on my end, I'm gonna put more female characters 110 00:04:08,925 --> 00:04:10,527 - in my next script. - Really? 111 00:04:10,527 --> 00:04:12,829 Yeah, uh, it's called Kill the Sluts. 112 00:04:12,829 --> 00:04:13,963 Uh, I'm gonna pick a title 113 00:04:13,963 --> 00:04:15,131 that's more PC a little bit later. 114 00:04:15,131 --> 00:04:17,167 That's a working title. But basically, uh, 115 00:04:17,167 --> 00:04:19,769 the movie's about this crazy psychopathic killer 116 00:04:19,769 --> 00:04:20,770 that goes on a killing rampage 117 00:04:20,770 --> 00:04:21,905 and kills all these teenage sluts. 118 00:04:21,905 --> 00:04:23,840 But the only person that he can't kill 119 00:04:23,840 --> 00:04:25,308 is an 18-year-old virgin. 120 00:04:25,308 --> 00:04:27,877 Don't you think that'll send out a weird message to women 121 00:04:27,877 --> 00:04:29,612 and teenage girls about sex? And those women 122 00:04:29,612 --> 00:04:31,247 might grow up and have a lot of issues. 123 00:04:31,247 --> 00:04:32,782 I'm not saying I'm against women's rights. 124 00:04:32,782 --> 00:04:34,517 I'm just saying that there's no market 125 00:04:34,517 --> 00:04:35,885 for their films. 126 00:05:48,158 --> 00:05:50,793 Hello! 127 00:05:51,928 --> 00:05:53,763 - Welcome! - Welcome, goddess! 128 00:05:53,763 --> 00:05:54,764 Is this your first time? 129 00:05:54,764 --> 00:05:57,066 - I guess so. - Are you ready 130 00:05:57,066 --> 00:05:58,935 to uncover your deepest desires 131 00:05:58,935 --> 00:06:02,305 and join the pleasure revolution? 132 00:06:02,305 --> 00:06:04,674 - I don't know. - That's good enough for now. 133 00:06:04,674 --> 00:06:06,442 You are in exactly the right place. 134 00:06:06,442 --> 00:06:09,345 - Yes! Welcome! - Oh. 135 00:06:10,780 --> 00:06:13,883 Fear! So what? 136 00:06:13,883 --> 00:06:17,754 Failure! So what? 137 00:06:17,754 --> 00:06:20,356 My pussy is strong! 138 00:06:20,623 --> 00:06:23,092 My pussy is strong! 139 00:06:23,092 --> 00:06:25,261 My pussy is a genius! 140 00:06:25,261 --> 00:06:28,131 My pussy is a genius! 141 00:06:28,131 --> 00:06:32,068 We must listen to our pussies. 142 00:06:32,068 --> 00:06:36,573 We must listen to our pussies. 143 00:06:39,776 --> 00:06:41,611 Ladies, I would now like to introduce you 144 00:06:41,611 --> 00:06:43,913 to a dear friend of mine, my mentor, 145 00:06:43,913 --> 00:06:49,619 Dr. Christiane Northrup! 146 00:06:51,688 --> 00:06:53,790 - What a pleasure. - Thank you. 147 00:06:53,790 --> 00:06:55,892 Thank you. Thank you. 148 00:06:55,892 --> 00:06:57,327 All right... 149 00:06:57,327 --> 00:06:58,628 I have something... 150 00:06:58,628 --> 00:07:02,065 really magical to tell you. 151 00:07:02,932 --> 00:07:05,868 I love my breasts. 152 00:07:06,002 --> 00:07:07,170 Say it with me. 153 00:07:07,170 --> 00:07:11,107 I love my breasts. 154 00:07:11,107 --> 00:07:12,475 I love your breasts, too, Chris. 155 00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:16,512 - And I love yours. Thank you. - Oh, thank you. 156 00:07:16,512 --> 00:07:17,647 Now it is time to honor 157 00:07:17,647 --> 00:07:19,349 the breasts of the women in the room. 158 00:07:19,349 --> 00:07:22,585 I would like you to turn to the person next to you, 159 00:07:22,585 --> 00:07:25,188 and look at her breasts and say, 160 00:07:25,188 --> 00:07:30,293 "Your bodacious ta-tas honor me and they honor you." 161 00:07:30,293 --> 00:07:32,362 Find-- everybody find a partner, please. 162 00:07:34,764 --> 00:07:37,166 Excuse me, could you-- could you be my partner? 163 00:07:37,166 --> 00:07:38,434 - Yes, sure. - Okay. 164 00:07:38,434 --> 00:07:39,569 Hi! I don't have a partner. 165 00:07:39,569 --> 00:07:41,704 Is it possible we could do a three-way? 166 00:07:41,704 --> 00:07:42,672 I've never done a three-way. 167 00:07:42,672 --> 00:07:45,575 This is my third time taking the class. 168 00:07:45,675 --> 00:07:47,443 First time... 169 00:07:47,443 --> 00:07:48,845 I liked my boobs. 170 00:07:48,845 --> 00:07:51,981 Second time, I loved my boobs. 171 00:07:51,981 --> 00:07:52,749 Now... 172 00:07:52,749 --> 00:07:56,085 I really, really love my boobs. 173 00:07:56,185 --> 00:07:57,287 - Mm! - Wow. 174 00:07:57,287 --> 00:08:00,657 Yeah. This is a powerful exercise to release the shame 175 00:08:00,657 --> 00:08:03,426 that we carry in our sexual organs. 176 00:08:03,426 --> 00:08:04,794 Okay! 177 00:08:04,794 --> 00:08:09,332 Your bodacious ta-tas honor me and they honor you. 178 00:08:10,066 --> 00:08:13,903 Your bodacious ta-tas honor me and they honor you. 179 00:08:14,604 --> 00:08:15,204 Okay! 180 00:08:15,204 --> 00:08:18,741 Your bodacious ta-tas honor me and they honor you. 181 00:08:18,741 --> 00:08:21,744 Wow! This is my first lesbian experience. 182 00:08:21,744 --> 00:08:24,847 I didn't know I had it in me. 183 00:08:25,248 --> 00:08:25,915 Okay. I-- 184 00:08:25,915 --> 00:08:27,750 are you Eva St. Claire the designer? 185 00:08:27,750 --> 00:08:29,085 - Yes. - Wow, I'm-- 186 00:08:29,085 --> 00:08:32,555 Why are you in this class? You seem so together. 187 00:08:33,289 --> 00:08:34,791 Believe me... 188 00:08:34,791 --> 00:08:35,692 I have issues. 189 00:08:35,692 --> 00:08:37,293 That is now the end of the class 190 00:08:37,293 --> 00:08:39,228 for the Divine Feminine Workshop. 191 00:08:39,228 --> 00:08:41,264 We will be meeting next week 192 00:08:41,264 --> 00:08:41,931 to worship 193 00:08:41,931 --> 00:08:45,101 and decorate our pussies. 194 00:08:46,836 --> 00:08:48,538 Thank you. 195 00:08:50,573 --> 00:08:55,645 Pussy! Pussy! Pussy! Pussy! 196 00:08:55,645 --> 00:08:57,046 This class changed my life. 197 00:08:57,046 --> 00:08:59,349 This class, my color-therapy workshops, 198 00:08:59,349 --> 00:09:02,618 and my past-life regression conferences. 199 00:09:03,086 --> 00:09:04,787 - What's color therapy? - Oh! 200 00:09:04,787 --> 00:09:07,557 It's about how certain colors make you feel. 201 00:09:08,157 --> 00:09:09,959 That sounds helpful. 202 00:09:09,959 --> 00:09:10,526 Oh! 203 00:09:10,526 --> 00:09:12,662 Do you guys want to come to the place where I work? 204 00:09:12,662 --> 00:09:15,765 I cast magical spells to make your dreams come true. 205 00:09:15,765 --> 00:09:16,866 I'm a hope-ologist. 206 00:09:16,866 --> 00:09:19,502 - What's a hope-ologist? - I just made that word up. 207 00:09:19,502 --> 00:09:20,303 Isn't it awesome? 208 00:09:20,303 --> 00:09:24,273 I believe in the religion of hope, or hope-ology. 209 00:09:24,273 --> 00:09:25,508 I just made that up, too! 210 00:09:25,508 --> 00:09:28,244 I just spent an hour singing about my pussy, 211 00:09:28,244 --> 00:09:29,445 so why the hell not? 212 00:09:29,445 --> 00:09:31,114 Yeah, I mean, it's either that or going home 213 00:09:31,114 --> 00:09:32,582 to think about how much I hate myself, 214 00:09:32,582 --> 00:09:34,684 - so let's do it. - Let's do it! 215 00:09:34,684 --> 00:09:38,521 ♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh Sha-ba-lum ♪ 216 00:09:38,521 --> 00:09:42,392 ♪ Ah-ooh sha-ba-lum Ah-ooh ♪ 217 00:09:42,392 --> 00:09:44,160 This place is really cool. 218 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:45,561 Okay. 219 00:09:46,796 --> 00:09:47,663 So... 220 00:09:47,663 --> 00:09:49,565 what do you want to wish for? 221 00:09:49,565 --> 00:09:51,534 - How does it work? - Oh... 222 00:09:51,534 --> 00:09:54,303 I carve these candles and cast spells on them. 223 00:09:54,303 --> 00:09:56,072 I don't know if it's positive intention 224 00:09:56,072 --> 00:09:58,708 or creative visualization or actual magic, 225 00:09:58,708 --> 00:10:01,778 but these spells work for a lot of people. 226 00:10:01,778 --> 00:10:04,914 Some of my regulars call me The Witch. 227 00:10:05,348 --> 00:10:07,316 - What kind of spells? - Oh! All kinds. 228 00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:10,486 Some for serious stuff, like for love, or work and stuff, 229 00:10:10,486 --> 00:10:13,723 but some fun ones, too, like, "I want my own unicorn." 230 00:10:13,723 --> 00:10:14,924 They aren't magical. 231 00:10:14,924 --> 00:10:16,926 They're overpriced candles for rich idiots 232 00:10:16,926 --> 00:10:18,694 who got nothing better to do. 233 00:10:18,694 --> 00:10:19,662 Your paycheck's on my desk. 234 00:10:19,662 --> 00:10:21,063 Can you take out the trash while you're at it? 235 00:10:21,063 --> 00:10:22,632 I don't want the rats getting in there. 236 00:10:22,632 --> 00:10:24,000 Sorry, Mr. J. 237 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,369 Did Mr. Fun Time just call us idiots? 238 00:10:26,369 --> 00:10:28,271 What an asshole. I think some people 239 00:10:28,271 --> 00:10:30,173 just don't have enough imagination. 240 00:10:30,173 --> 00:10:32,175 Honey, I think you should go first. 241 00:10:32,175 --> 00:10:34,110 Okay. Um, hmm. 242 00:10:34,110 --> 00:10:36,279 Well, I want to have hot sex with someone 243 00:10:36,279 --> 00:10:37,814 who's really nice to me. 244 00:10:37,814 --> 00:10:42,118 Hot sex. Yes. Give it to me! I want that, too. 245 00:10:42,118 --> 00:10:46,155 I want to not fall asleep during sex. 246 00:10:46,155 --> 00:10:47,957 I want to be awake. 247 00:10:48,791 --> 00:10:50,059 I want to be... 248 00:10:50,059 --> 00:10:51,928 an active part of it. 249 00:10:51,928 --> 00:10:54,997 - Okay, I want in. I want in! - Okay. 250 00:10:55,064 --> 00:10:56,265 Um... 251 00:10:56,265 --> 00:10:58,835 I'm gonna use the red candle 252 00:10:58,835 --> 00:11:00,436 for passion. 253 00:11:00,603 --> 00:11:01,437 So... 254 00:11:01,437 --> 00:11:03,172 you hold the candle and you think 255 00:11:03,172 --> 00:11:05,908 about what you want to release from your life, 256 00:11:05,908 --> 00:11:08,978 and then think about what you want. 257 00:11:09,111 --> 00:11:11,747 Picture the hot sex. 258 00:11:15,952 --> 00:11:17,487 Okay. 259 00:11:17,553 --> 00:11:18,321 All right. 260 00:11:18,321 --> 00:11:20,656 I want to have the hottest sex I've ever had 261 00:11:20,656 --> 00:11:23,626 with someone who's really nice to me. 262 00:11:25,027 --> 00:11:26,863 And so mote it be. 263 00:11:26,996 --> 00:11:27,563 "Mote"? 264 00:11:27,563 --> 00:11:30,733 It's witch talk for "and so shall it be." 265 00:11:30,900 --> 00:11:32,268 Witch talk. 266 00:11:32,268 --> 00:11:33,870 I like it. 267 00:11:34,170 --> 00:11:34,770 Okay. 268 00:11:34,770 --> 00:11:38,174 You guys, I really just want my ex-husband back. 269 00:11:38,174 --> 00:11:40,676 I don't need hot sex. 270 00:11:40,676 --> 00:11:41,377 I mean, like... 271 00:11:41,377 --> 00:11:44,780 room-temperature-warm sex would be nice 272 00:11:44,780 --> 00:11:47,016 for me. Here we go. 273 00:11:47,216 --> 00:11:49,519 And so mote it be. 274 00:11:49,519 --> 00:11:51,254 And so mote it be. 275 00:11:51,988 --> 00:11:53,022 Hmm. 276 00:11:53,022 --> 00:11:55,358 I want hot sex with Daniel. 277 00:11:55,458 --> 00:11:57,560 - So mote it be. - So mote it be. 278 00:12:04,133 --> 00:12:07,637 Okay, I don't know if all of this is BS, 279 00:12:07,637 --> 00:12:09,171 but I actually feel better. 280 00:12:09,171 --> 00:12:12,041 Oh, my God, I'm invited to a fun party tonight! 281 00:12:12,041 --> 00:12:13,709 Do you guys want to go with me? 282 00:12:13,709 --> 00:12:14,944 - Yeah! - Yeah! 283 00:12:14,944 --> 00:12:18,080 ♪ I got the light ♪ 284 00:12:18,714 --> 00:12:21,684 ♪ I got the light ♪ 285 00:12:22,552 --> 00:12:25,221 ♪ I got the light ♪ 286 00:12:26,355 --> 00:12:29,158 ♪ I got the light ♪ 287 00:12:29,959 --> 00:12:33,129 ♪ I got the light ♪ 288 00:12:34,363 --> 00:12:35,631 ♪ I got the light ♪ 289 00:12:35,631 --> 00:12:37,900 - Oh, my God. - Wait for it. 290 00:12:37,900 --> 00:12:39,235 ♪ I got the light ♪ 291 00:12:39,235 --> 00:12:41,237 Oh, yeah! Here we go. 292 00:12:41,237 --> 00:12:44,006 Ah! 293 00:12:44,006 --> 00:12:47,877 Oh, my God! Amazing! 294 00:12:48,678 --> 00:12:49,579 Hi! 295 00:12:49,579 --> 00:12:51,948 ♪ I got the light ♪ 296 00:13:00,022 --> 00:13:01,123 Oh, my God. 297 00:13:08,664 --> 00:13:12,101 ♪ I got the light ♪ 298 00:13:12,602 --> 00:13:23,980 ♪ I got the light ♪ 299 00:13:27,316 --> 00:13:29,885 - Hey! - Ah! 300 00:13:30,086 --> 00:13:32,221 - Hi! - It's so good to see you, babe. 301 00:13:32,221 --> 00:13:33,356 Good to see you, too. 302 00:13:33,356 --> 00:13:35,424 And who is your gorgeous friend? 303 00:13:35,424 --> 00:13:36,158 Oh, uh... 304 00:13:36,158 --> 00:13:38,561 Honey, this is Freedom. He's a great artist. 305 00:13:38,561 --> 00:13:40,630 He does these cool light installations. 306 00:13:40,630 --> 00:13:43,265 - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 307 00:13:44,767 --> 00:13:47,069 I would really love to show you my art installations. 308 00:13:47,069 --> 00:13:48,404 I would love to see your art installations. 309 00:13:48,404 --> 00:13:50,773 Yeah, I'd really love to dance with you right now. 310 00:13:50,773 --> 00:13:52,375 - Okay! - Yeah. 311 00:13:57,847 --> 00:14:00,950 ♪ I got the light ♪ 312 00:14:01,283 --> 00:14:04,687 ♪ I got the light ♪ 313 00:14:05,554 --> 00:14:07,923 ♪ I got the light ♪ 314 00:14:08,758 --> 00:14:11,794 ♪ Oh I got the light ♪ 315 00:14:12,361 --> 00:14:14,897 Want to get something to eat? 316 00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:18,100 I-- I can't, 'cause I have to get up early tomorrow, 317 00:14:18,100 --> 00:14:20,369 and I have a boyfriend. 318 00:14:23,773 --> 00:14:25,107 What's that? 319 00:14:25,107 --> 00:14:25,975 "No one... 320 00:14:25,975 --> 00:14:27,109 can take away the dance." 321 00:14:27,109 --> 00:14:29,345 It's a Spanish saying. 322 00:14:29,345 --> 00:14:30,379 No matter what happens, 323 00:14:30,379 --> 00:14:33,115 we'll always have this wonderful night... 324 00:14:33,783 --> 00:14:35,284 and our dance. 325 00:14:35,284 --> 00:14:36,819 Oh. 326 00:14:37,153 --> 00:14:39,689 Thanks for your jacket. 327 00:14:40,056 --> 00:14:41,657 That was fun. 328 00:14:41,791 --> 00:14:42,992 ♪ I got the light ♪ 329 00:14:42,992 --> 00:14:46,662 ♪ I got the light ♪ ♪ I got the light ♪ 330 00:14:46,662 --> 00:14:49,298 The dance lives forever. 331 00:14:49,298 --> 00:14:51,333 Dance lives forever! 332 00:14:51,333 --> 00:14:54,503 ♪ I got the light ♪ 333 00:14:54,503 --> 00:14:58,340 - ♪ I got the light ♪ - ♪ I got the light ♪ 334 00:14:58,340 --> 00:15:02,645 - ♪ I got the light ♪ - ♪ All of the way ♪ 335 00:15:02,645 --> 00:15:05,414 ♪ I got the light ♪ 336 00:15:05,915 --> 00:15:07,583 This is what I want to happen. I want the slut 337 00:15:07,583 --> 00:15:09,585 to have an orgasm, and when she has an orgasm 338 00:15:09,585 --> 00:15:10,986 I want the killer to come up behind her 339 00:15:10,986 --> 00:15:12,588 and just stab her in the ass, okay? 340 00:15:12,588 --> 00:15:14,623 I want there to be a lot of blood in this scene. 341 00:15:14,623 --> 00:15:16,125 Like, almost too much, where you're like... 342 00:15:16,125 --> 00:15:19,995 But--but a lot, but, like-- but, like, almost too much. 343 00:15:19,995 --> 00:15:21,931 I also want there to be very good dialogue, 344 00:15:21,931 --> 00:15:23,532 okay? And that's where you come in. 345 00:15:23,532 --> 00:15:25,768 So I want the character to say something cool, like, 346 00:15:25,768 --> 00:15:27,236 "Fuck you, bitch! Fuck you!" 347 00:15:27,236 --> 00:15:28,971 "Fuck you, bitch. Fuck you." Got it. 348 00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:31,440 Do whatever you want to do, but that. 349 00:15:32,575 --> 00:15:35,444 I'm sick of watching women get stabbed in movies. 350 00:15:35,444 --> 00:15:39,615 I think it's a great idea, Peter. I love all your ideas. 351 00:15:40,983 --> 00:15:41,951 So much. 352 00:15:41,951 --> 00:15:44,420 Excuse me, but why does the woman who enjoys sex 353 00:15:44,420 --> 00:15:45,988 always have to die in horror films? 354 00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:48,591 Maybe she could fight back. 355 00:15:49,358 --> 00:15:52,328 We could work in some more nudity that way. 356 00:15:52,328 --> 00:15:53,462 What if the slut fights the killer 357 00:15:53,462 --> 00:15:56,565 and every orgasm she has makes her stronger. 358 00:15:56,565 --> 00:15:57,633 That's funny. 359 00:15:57,633 --> 00:15:59,902 I think we should at least try it. 360 00:15:59,902 --> 00:16:01,804 Well, you know what, John? I would try that, 361 00:16:01,804 --> 00:16:02,805 but I-- I can't-- I actually-- 362 00:16:02,805 --> 00:16:04,740 I think that that's probably the worst fucking idea 363 00:16:04,740 --> 00:16:06,075 I've ever heard in my entire life, 364 00:16:06,075 --> 00:16:07,576 so I probably can't do that one. 365 00:16:07,576 --> 00:16:09,478 I like sluts. Why do they all have to die? 366 00:16:09,478 --> 00:16:11,914 I mean, nobody kills male sluts in movies. 367 00:16:11,914 --> 00:16:13,716 I like sluts, too. 368 00:16:13,716 --> 00:16:15,484 Who doesn't like sluts? 369 00:16:15,484 --> 00:16:16,619 Maybe one should live. 370 00:16:16,619 --> 00:16:18,721 Well... Linda, the thing is, you already approved 371 00:16:18,721 --> 00:16:20,689 - the draft that I wrote, so-- - Who are you? 372 00:16:20,689 --> 00:16:22,491 I'm a development person. 373 00:16:22,491 --> 00:16:25,628 Well, yeah, she was my old assistant until recently 374 00:16:25,628 --> 00:16:26,662 I promoted her into development 375 00:16:26,662 --> 00:16:29,298 before I realized what an angry feminist she is. 376 00:16:29,298 --> 00:16:32,701 She's also a writer. Actually, a really good writer. 377 00:16:32,701 --> 00:16:33,869 Well, we all write. 378 00:16:33,869 --> 00:16:34,737 I want to be a writer. 379 00:16:34,737 --> 00:16:37,006 I'm-- I'm the young assistant. 380 00:16:37,273 --> 00:16:38,407 - Peter's. - All right, 381 00:16:38,407 --> 00:16:39,975 well, you know, that's confusing, 382 00:16:39,975 --> 00:16:43,045 but I like this idea. I think we should explore it. 383 00:16:43,045 --> 00:16:46,382 - Yeah, Linda, but I think-- - Peter, I gave you final cut. 384 00:16:46,382 --> 00:16:50,953 No studio's gonna offer you that. The slut lives. 385 00:16:50,953 --> 00:16:51,821 Old assistant person, 386 00:16:51,821 --> 00:16:55,257 I would like you and John to work on the next draft. 387 00:16:55,257 --> 00:16:57,359 Get it to me when you're done. 388 00:16:58,494 --> 00:17:00,596 Linda, if I could just-- 389 00:17:00,596 --> 00:17:03,132 Yeah, I have an appointment in St. Barts 390 00:17:03,132 --> 00:17:04,900 later today. 391 00:17:07,703 --> 00:17:10,806 Excuse me, but what the hell was that? 392 00:17:10,806 --> 00:17:12,441 Well, when we started working together, 393 00:17:12,441 --> 00:17:14,343 you said you liked my ideas. 394 00:17:14,343 --> 00:17:15,477 It embarrasses me to think 395 00:17:15,477 --> 00:17:18,113 about the idiotic films that you want to make. 396 00:17:18,113 --> 00:17:19,081 Thought it was a good idea. 397 00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:21,617 Better than a guy stabbing a girl in the ass. 398 00:17:21,617 --> 00:17:22,318 Sex and violence 399 00:17:22,318 --> 00:17:24,920 is a proven formula that makes a profit. 400 00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:26,689 Well, what about... 401 00:17:26,689 --> 00:17:28,424 sex and happiness? 402 00:17:28,424 --> 00:17:30,226 You're embarrassing yourself! 403 00:17:30,226 --> 00:17:32,661 The-- What are you talking about? 404 00:17:33,095 --> 00:17:35,064 I want to break up. 405 00:17:36,298 --> 00:17:37,867 What? Really? 406 00:17:37,867 --> 00:17:40,736 You want to break up with-- with me? 407 00:17:40,803 --> 00:17:42,204 Do you have any idea 408 00:17:42,204 --> 00:17:45,174 how many girls want to sleep with me right now, 409 00:17:45,174 --> 00:17:46,942 huh? So many. 410 00:17:47,009 --> 00:17:48,277 I'm Peter Brock, okay? 411 00:17:48,277 --> 00:17:50,746 Well, why don't you go have sex with them? 412 00:17:51,213 --> 00:17:53,415 Yeah, maybe I-- maybe I will, okay? 413 00:17:53,415 --> 00:17:56,118 But, no, you know what? Actually... 414 00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:57,553 rewind. I break up with you. 415 00:17:57,553 --> 00:17:59,889 Before what you said, I break up with you 416 00:17:59,889 --> 00:18:01,690 before you said you break up with me. 417 00:18:01,690 --> 00:18:03,392 It was my idea. 418 00:18:04,159 --> 00:18:05,594 Great idea. 419 00:18:05,594 --> 00:18:07,596 I'm Peter Brock. Look at this. 420 00:18:07,596 --> 00:18:10,666 Look at all-- There's three posters here. 421 00:18:10,666 --> 00:18:11,333 More-- I-- 422 00:18:11,333 --> 00:18:14,270 There's some behind the door I didn't even hang up. 423 00:18:14,570 --> 00:18:17,273 You are my honey bunny. Come here. 424 00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:19,842 You are my honey bunny. 425 00:18:21,243 --> 00:18:22,678 Oh... 426 00:18:25,781 --> 00:18:27,416 Get me a coffee. 427 00:18:34,056 --> 00:18:36,892 Yeah, but he sounds like a wanker. 428 00:18:36,892 --> 00:18:37,726 Why work for him? 429 00:18:37,726 --> 00:18:39,628 Well, it's hard to find work in the movie business. 430 00:18:39,628 --> 00:18:42,164 - It's a man's world. - Yeah, 431 00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:44,600 well, yeah. Huh? 432 00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:45,968 Mm! 433 00:18:46,335 --> 00:18:48,404 Do you like eating with your hands? 434 00:18:48,404 --> 00:18:49,805 Um, I don't know. 435 00:18:49,805 --> 00:18:53,409 Mm. You know, you can just feel the food, you know? 436 00:18:53,409 --> 00:18:55,344 Sometimes I just want to eat like a dog. 437 00:18:55,344 --> 00:18:58,981 Yeah, I just want to put my face in there, yeah? 438 00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,283 Huh? 439 00:19:01,717 --> 00:19:04,086 Mm-mm! 440 00:19:06,188 --> 00:19:06,922 Come on, try it. 441 00:19:06,922 --> 00:19:08,123 Oh, it's so good. Give it a go. 442 00:19:08,123 --> 00:19:09,925 - Come on. - Oh, no, it's okay. 443 00:19:09,925 --> 00:19:11,927 Come on. You've got to try this. 444 00:19:12,594 --> 00:19:14,096 Come on. 445 00:19:15,898 --> 00:19:18,200 - Mm. Yum. - Yeah? Right? 446 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:19,735 - Delicious. - Yeah. 447 00:19:19,735 --> 00:19:21,670 It's straight from the plate to your face. 448 00:19:21,670 --> 00:19:23,105 Wow, it's so much better this way. 449 00:19:23,105 --> 00:19:25,708 It is, absolutely. I'm gonna join you down here. 450 00:19:25,708 --> 00:19:28,010 Mm! Oh, it's so good! Mm! 451 00:19:28,010 --> 00:19:29,712 I love you. 452 00:19:29,712 --> 00:19:31,046 I love you. 453 00:19:33,449 --> 00:19:35,117 You know I don't... 454 00:19:35,417 --> 00:19:36,752 want a relationship, right? 455 00:19:36,752 --> 00:19:38,087 You knew that, though, right? 456 00:19:38,087 --> 00:19:39,788 - That's just... That's just... - Wait. 457 00:19:39,788 --> 00:19:42,925 Well, aren't we already actually having a relationship? 458 00:19:42,925 --> 00:19:44,526 - I mean... - I mean, if you wanna-- 459 00:19:44,526 --> 00:19:45,728 we've been dating for two years 460 00:19:45,728 --> 00:19:46,929 and you just told me you loved me. 461 00:19:46,929 --> 00:19:51,567 Oh, Yeah, well, you know, I-- Yeah, I love you, you know, I-- 462 00:19:51,567 --> 00:19:55,704 I love you as a sister, you know, as a friend, and... 463 00:19:55,704 --> 00:19:58,340 as-- as a sexual partner, uh... 464 00:19:58,340 --> 00:20:00,976 as-- as a fellow human being, you know? 465 00:20:00,976 --> 00:20:03,779 But I think we should just find a new and better way to-- 466 00:20:03,779 --> 00:20:05,547 to do relationships. 467 00:20:05,547 --> 00:20:08,283 - You know? - Yeah. 468 00:20:09,351 --> 00:20:11,053 - Right? - Okay. 469 00:20:11,053 --> 00:20:14,156 Oh. Shit. Babe, I got to-- I got to go, actually, 470 00:20:14,156 --> 00:20:18,193 'cause I have a... I just-- I just got a crazy week. 471 00:20:18,193 --> 00:20:19,528 Oh, can I also, uh-- 472 00:20:19,528 --> 00:20:24,299 Babe, can I-- can I leave that, uh, my laundry here and, uh... 473 00:20:24,366 --> 00:20:26,168 get it on Thursday? 474 00:20:26,235 --> 00:20:30,239 You want me to do your laundry while you date other women? 475 00:20:30,239 --> 00:20:32,875 That's... I mean, that would be really insensitive 476 00:20:32,875 --> 00:20:34,877 if we were in some old-fashioned, 477 00:20:34,877 --> 00:20:36,178 you know, closed-minded... 478 00:20:36,178 --> 00:20:38,113 relationship, but since we're not, you know, 479 00:20:38,113 --> 00:20:40,616 we're-- we're, uh, we're not confining ourselves 480 00:20:40,616 --> 00:20:42,551 to societal norms, then I think-- 481 00:20:42,551 --> 00:20:44,887 I think it's fine. Yeah. 482 00:20:44,887 --> 00:20:46,555 All right. 483 00:20:46,622 --> 00:20:47,756 Bye. 484 00:20:55,264 --> 00:20:58,400 Hey. Um, me again. Listen, 485 00:20:58,400 --> 00:20:59,234 I was just gonna say 486 00:20:59,234 --> 00:21:02,938 why don't you just ignore those previous voicemails, okay? 487 00:21:02,938 --> 00:21:03,739 Because... 488 00:21:03,739 --> 00:21:06,642 here's-- here's the real truth, okay? 489 00:21:06,642 --> 00:21:08,310 Let's get honest. 490 00:21:08,410 --> 00:21:10,112 I am great. 491 00:21:10,112 --> 00:21:11,713 I'm great. I'm so great. 492 00:21:11,713 --> 00:21:16,418 And I'm super-happy for you and Chandra. 493 00:21:16,418 --> 00:21:17,686 And here's the thing, 494 00:21:17,686 --> 00:21:19,988 I'm so happy! I'm so happy and I'm great. 495 00:21:19,988 --> 00:21:23,025 Like, if great were people, I'd be, like, fucking-- 496 00:21:23,025 --> 00:21:24,560 Where is there a lot of people? India? 497 00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:29,965 Beijing? I'm fucking Beijing. That's how great I am. 498 00:21:30,365 --> 00:21:32,634 So I saved one of your messages that you left me, 499 00:21:32,634 --> 00:21:33,869 you know, right when you were, like, 500 00:21:33,869 --> 00:21:35,604 "Hey, by the way, I'm fucking a 19-year-old." 501 00:21:35,604 --> 00:21:38,173 It's such a great message. It's so amazing. 502 00:21:38,173 --> 00:21:41,376 I'm so glad you told me things on a voicemail. 503 00:21:41,376 --> 00:21:42,377 You are so brave. 504 00:21:42,377 --> 00:21:44,680 And by "brave," I mean, like, 505 00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:45,714 you're a fucking idiot. 506 00:21:45,714 --> 00:21:46,682 I just wanted you to know that. 507 00:21:46,682 --> 00:21:48,684 I saved it, and I play it for my friends. 508 00:21:48,684 --> 00:21:50,185 And we laugh and laugh. 509 00:21:50,185 --> 00:21:52,921 And then I tell them about your weird dick. 510 00:21:53,055 --> 00:21:55,557 And I'm fucking naked. 511 00:21:55,557 --> 00:21:56,425 And I have on-- 512 00:21:56,425 --> 00:21:59,027 I have on those... high-heel, like, 513 00:21:59,027 --> 00:22:01,096 fuck-me pumps that you love. 514 00:22:01,096 --> 00:22:03,132 Oh, yeah, I'm naked. 515 00:22:03,132 --> 00:22:04,399 Mm. You know what else? 516 00:22:04,399 --> 00:22:07,536 Remember that time you told me to squeeze your dick really hard 517 00:22:07,536 --> 00:22:08,971 at the base of it? 518 00:22:08,971 --> 00:22:11,106 I'm fucking doing that... 519 00:22:11,106 --> 00:22:14,276 and you don't-- Yeah, and it's awesome. 520 00:22:15,811 --> 00:22:18,280 So, baby, call me. 521 00:22:21,717 --> 00:22:25,154 'Cause I could suck your cock. 522 00:22:25,154 --> 00:22:27,356 I really think you should come over, 523 00:22:27,356 --> 00:22:29,658 'cause I might do something bad to myself. 524 00:22:29,658 --> 00:22:33,228 Oh, my God, I might do something so bad, and then... 525 00:22:33,228 --> 00:22:34,396 I mean, I don't know what I would do, 526 00:22:34,396 --> 00:22:36,832 but it would be bad, and then you would feel guilty, 527 00:22:36,832 --> 00:22:39,134 like, for the rest of your life. 528 00:22:39,134 --> 00:22:40,335 So... 529 00:22:40,335 --> 00:22:44,373 I can't wait to hear from you. Okay. 530 00:22:44,540 --> 00:22:46,141 Bye! 531 00:22:54,550 --> 00:22:56,084 Wow. 532 00:22:56,151 --> 00:22:58,086 This is amazing. 533 00:23:08,797 --> 00:23:11,934 - Is this all your art? - Oh, yeah. 534 00:23:12,367 --> 00:23:13,602 See... 535 00:23:13,602 --> 00:23:17,105 our society is sick, yeah? 536 00:23:17,172 --> 00:23:20,209 It's no wonder the Earth is dying, 537 00:23:20,209 --> 00:23:23,979 'cause the culture sends its message, yeah? 538 00:23:23,979 --> 00:23:25,881 Join the rat race. Make money. 539 00:23:25,881 --> 00:23:27,649 Be a winner, otherwise you're nothing. 540 00:23:27,649 --> 00:23:31,153 It's read Us Weekly. Drink the Kool-Aid. 541 00:23:31,153 --> 00:23:32,521 Fuck that shit. 542 00:23:32,521 --> 00:23:36,358 I'm my own man. I mean, sure, got to make money. 543 00:23:36,425 --> 00:23:38,560 But I don't let them own me 544 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:41,096 by seeking their approval, yeah? 545 00:23:41,863 --> 00:23:44,266 I'm free. 546 00:23:44,666 --> 00:23:46,868 Why I chose the name Freedom. 547 00:23:46,969 --> 00:23:48,670 Okay. 548 00:23:54,309 --> 00:23:57,079 I don't go to exercise classes, you know? 549 00:23:57,713 --> 00:23:59,348 I do my own thing. 550 00:24:00,782 --> 00:24:02,551 Why follow the man? 551 00:24:02,551 --> 00:24:04,586 I create my own moves 552 00:24:04,586 --> 00:24:08,223 I don't need someone to give them to me. 553 00:24:08,223 --> 00:24:11,260 Well, yoga exercises are thousands of years old 554 00:24:11,260 --> 00:24:13,395 for a reason. They really work. 555 00:24:19,368 --> 00:24:22,404 Why don't you let the man out of you? 556 00:24:24,339 --> 00:24:26,642 Why don't you go your own way... 557 00:24:27,309 --> 00:24:30,145 instead of trying to please people? 558 00:24:47,562 --> 00:24:50,132 Are you gonna keep doing those moves? 559 00:24:50,799 --> 00:24:52,301 Oh, yeah. 560 00:25:06,014 --> 00:25:08,350 Eva? 561 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:12,888 Shit. 562 00:25:12,888 --> 00:25:14,556 Are you in there? 563 00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:20,462 Hi. 564 00:25:21,663 --> 00:25:22,497 Fuck-me pumps, huh? 565 00:25:22,497 --> 00:25:24,966 Uh, they're upstairs. You want me to get them? 566 00:25:24,966 --> 00:25:26,401 No. That's okay. 567 00:25:26,401 --> 00:25:28,170 I took them off 'cause they hurt my feet. 568 00:25:28,170 --> 00:25:30,706 - Mm-hmm. - You put on the sweats. 569 00:25:31,340 --> 00:25:33,675 I was worried, obviously. 570 00:25:33,675 --> 00:25:34,910 So many messages. 571 00:25:34,910 --> 00:25:35,844 You were worried about me? 572 00:25:35,844 --> 00:25:39,314 Well... 14 messages and some suicide threats. 573 00:25:39,314 --> 00:25:43,552 I never said suicide. I said, "Maybe something bad." 574 00:25:44,219 --> 00:25:48,056 And that you would die alone. You're not gonna die alone. 575 00:25:48,423 --> 00:25:49,825 But if you do... 576 00:25:49,825 --> 00:25:52,327 it's because of doing things like this. 577 00:25:53,095 --> 00:25:55,097 You look really nice. 578 00:25:55,097 --> 00:25:56,631 Thank you. I'm gonna go. 579 00:25:56,631 --> 00:25:58,900 It's Chandra's birthday. We're doing a thing. 580 00:25:58,900 --> 00:26:01,136 It's her birthday? 581 00:26:01,136 --> 00:26:03,238 Oh, wait, I have a question for you. 582 00:26:03,238 --> 00:26:05,841 - Mm-hmm. - Like, where was Chandra... 583 00:26:05,841 --> 00:26:08,577 when I was putting you through art school? 584 00:26:08,577 --> 00:26:09,945 Oh, my God! That's right! 585 00:26:09,945 --> 00:26:11,046 Here comes the flood. 586 00:26:11,046 --> 00:26:12,080 - Oh, my God! - Here it is. 587 00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:13,982 - She was in kindergarten. Yay! - We are doing this. 588 00:26:13,982 --> 00:26:16,451 Well, guess what, Eva, I could never keep up with you, 589 00:26:16,451 --> 00:26:18,320 'cause all you ever cared about was money. 590 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:19,821 You're a fucking liar, 591 00:26:19,821 --> 00:26:21,490 because I don't care about money. 592 00:26:21,490 --> 00:26:24,393 I put you through art school. You're just like... What? 593 00:26:24,393 --> 00:26:26,294 What do you even do for a living? 594 00:26:26,294 --> 00:26:27,262 You drive a douchebag car. 595 00:26:27,262 --> 00:26:29,531 I wanted a much douchier car than that. 596 00:26:29,531 --> 00:26:30,932 That was the one we could afford. 597 00:26:30,932 --> 00:26:32,934 I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. 598 00:26:32,934 --> 00:26:34,836 I don't like you right now. 599 00:26:34,836 --> 00:26:36,271 I love you... 600 00:26:36,271 --> 00:26:38,907 somewhat. But right now... 601 00:26:39,174 --> 00:26:41,109 I don't think you would like you, either, 602 00:26:41,109 --> 00:26:43,078 'cause you're being horrible... 603 00:26:43,145 --> 00:26:44,679 and you look... 604 00:26:45,013 --> 00:26:45,680 horrible. 605 00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:49,217 I just wanted to have a baby! 606 00:26:49,451 --> 00:26:51,052 Okay. Come here. 607 00:26:51,887 --> 00:26:54,055 Come here. Come here. 608 00:26:54,055 --> 00:26:55,190 - Hi. Hi. - Don't, don't, don't. 609 00:26:55,190 --> 00:26:57,659 No, don't make it a thing. Don't make it a thing. 610 00:26:57,659 --> 00:27:00,061 Oh, my God, you smell so weird. 611 00:27:00,128 --> 00:27:01,663 - You smell so good. - No, just don't. 612 00:27:01,663 --> 00:27:05,133 Don't humiliate yourself anymore than you have, okay? 613 00:27:05,133 --> 00:27:06,001 You smell like... 614 00:27:06,001 --> 00:27:08,637 - I don't know, like, lavender-- - Okay. Just stop. Just stop. 615 00:27:08,637 --> 00:27:09,938 Don't embarrass yourself... 616 00:27:09,938 --> 00:27:12,607 - anymore. - You don't embarrass yourself, 617 00:27:12,607 --> 00:27:14,309 buddy. You settle down. 618 00:27:14,309 --> 00:27:16,645 - What's happening down there? - Don't. Don't. 619 00:27:16,645 --> 00:27:18,780 - We're not. - Okay. 620 00:27:19,948 --> 00:27:22,684 Brew up some coffee. Don't. Please. 621 00:27:22,684 --> 00:27:25,921 I care very deeply about you without loving you. 622 00:27:25,921 --> 00:27:28,890 Throw up, go to sleep, take a shower. 623 00:27:28,890 --> 00:27:30,592 I already threw up. 624 00:27:32,327 --> 00:27:34,463 I love you so much. 625 00:27:34,463 --> 00:27:36,932 Bye. Thank you for coming! 626 00:27:44,206 --> 00:27:47,342 The only reason a man and a woman 627 00:27:47,342 --> 00:27:50,111 should have carnal knowledge of each other... 628 00:27:50,111 --> 00:27:51,780 is to create a child. 629 00:27:53,315 --> 00:27:55,116 Any other physical union 630 00:27:55,116 --> 00:27:58,820 between a man and a woman... 631 00:27:58,887 --> 00:28:00,755 is a sin. 632 00:28:03,892 --> 00:28:05,961 And sins are punishable 633 00:28:05,961 --> 00:28:08,663 by hellfire and damnation. 634 00:28:08,663 --> 00:28:09,531 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 635 00:28:09,531 --> 00:28:13,001 - You will go to hell! - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 636 00:28:13,001 --> 00:28:15,637 I'm sorry. 637 00:28:16,538 --> 00:28:18,073 You all right? 638 00:28:19,474 --> 00:28:22,711 - Did I just say that out loud? - Yeah. 639 00:28:24,613 --> 00:28:25,313 It felt so good. 640 00:28:25,313 --> 00:28:28,149 It felt like I was doing something wrong. 641 00:28:28,216 --> 00:28:29,718 I'm fucked up. 642 00:28:29,718 --> 00:28:31,753 I don't think you're fucked up. 643 00:28:31,753 --> 00:28:34,256 - You don't? - No. 644 00:28:34,823 --> 00:28:36,892 I think you're divine. 645 00:28:38,126 --> 00:28:40,061 Divinity itself... 646 00:28:40,195 --> 00:28:42,130 in a physical form. 647 00:28:42,531 --> 00:28:44,833 - Really? - Yeah. 648 00:29:00,248 --> 00:29:03,151 I thought I knew what sex and orgasms were before, 649 00:29:03,151 --> 00:29:03,919 but I did not. 650 00:29:03,919 --> 00:29:06,354 I feel like I understand the meaning of life now, 651 00:29:06,354 --> 00:29:08,089 and the meaning of life is to have as much sex 652 00:29:08,089 --> 00:29:12,027 as possible with this guy over and over again. 653 00:29:12,027 --> 00:29:13,862 Oh! Great sex! 654 00:29:13,862 --> 00:29:15,397 Oh, it makes you do stupid things. 655 00:29:15,397 --> 00:29:17,599 I feel like I tried to please the guy so much before 656 00:29:17,599 --> 00:29:20,602 that I never, like, really got off. 657 00:29:21,102 --> 00:29:22,671 Darren would just... 658 00:29:22,671 --> 00:29:25,740 jam it in there without a lot of warm-up. 659 00:29:25,740 --> 00:29:27,309 And that was on the rare occasions 660 00:29:27,309 --> 00:29:29,711 that he could get it up. 661 00:29:29,978 --> 00:29:30,679 This is your ex? 662 00:29:30,679 --> 00:29:32,213 You know what? People say they want to hear the truth, 663 00:29:32,213 --> 00:29:35,383 but they don't. They just want to be, like, "Oh, poor Eva. 664 00:29:35,383 --> 00:29:37,786 Did you hear Eva's husband cheated on her?" 665 00:29:37,786 --> 00:29:41,089 Here's the truth, I supported him financially 666 00:29:41,089 --> 00:29:42,090 for 14 years. 667 00:29:42,090 --> 00:29:44,459 That emasculated him. Oh, poor guy. 668 00:29:44,459 --> 00:29:46,928 So then he got erectile dysfunction. "Oh, wah" 669 00:29:46,928 --> 00:29:49,097 So then he had to go fuck a 21-year-old, 670 00:29:49,097 --> 00:29:51,866 so he could feel like a man again! 671 00:29:52,601 --> 00:29:55,337 He's not worthy of you, 'cause you're great. 672 00:29:55,337 --> 00:29:56,871 Yeah. 673 00:29:57,205 --> 00:29:58,373 Thank you. 674 00:29:58,373 --> 00:29:59,874 I feel like I have to do everything 675 00:29:59,874 --> 00:30:01,509 the guy says or he'll leave me. 676 00:30:01,509 --> 00:30:04,212 Like, I've been dating this guy for two years, 677 00:30:04,212 --> 00:30:06,681 pretending the entire time like I don't know 678 00:30:06,681 --> 00:30:07,515 he's dating other girls. 679 00:30:07,515 --> 00:30:09,718 You need to ask him for what you want. Just say, 680 00:30:09,718 --> 00:30:10,885 "I only want you to see me." 681 00:30:10,885 --> 00:30:13,188 Or date other men and flaunt them in front of him. 682 00:30:13,188 --> 00:30:14,489 Yeah, but I only want him. 683 00:30:14,489 --> 00:30:15,590 God, why are we sitting around 684 00:30:15,590 --> 00:30:17,258 talking about how sad our lives are? 685 00:30:17,258 --> 00:30:18,360 Why do women do that? 686 00:30:18,360 --> 00:30:20,629 You know, you're right. We should be talking about 687 00:30:20,629 --> 00:30:21,463 how great we are, 688 00:30:21,463 --> 00:30:23,965 and if someone gives us a compliment, we should say, 689 00:30:23,965 --> 00:30:27,235 "Thank you. It's true." 690 00:30:27,235 --> 00:30:28,803 You start. 691 00:30:28,803 --> 00:30:29,404 What? 692 00:30:29,404 --> 00:30:31,306 - And give myself a compliment? - Yeah. 693 00:30:31,306 --> 00:30:32,974 Yeah, just do it. 694 00:30:33,608 --> 00:30:35,577 Okay. Um... 695 00:30:35,577 --> 00:30:37,812 I think I'm more attractive than I thought 696 00:30:37,812 --> 00:30:40,015 'cause-- All right, well, there's this guy 697 00:30:40,015 --> 00:30:41,516 at the coffee cart on the beach. 698 00:30:41,516 --> 00:30:42,851 He asks me out all the time. 699 00:30:42,851 --> 00:30:45,787 He's super-attractive, and he's 28 700 00:30:45,787 --> 00:30:47,989 You should go for it. 701 00:30:47,989 --> 00:30:49,524 - No. - Yeah! 702 00:30:49,524 --> 00:30:53,662 Really? Move over. There's a new skank in town. 703 00:30:55,096 --> 00:30:56,131 I think I'm gonna tell my man 704 00:30:56,131 --> 00:30:58,466 that I'm not gonna do his laundry. 705 00:30:58,800 --> 00:30:59,601 So there! 706 00:30:59,601 --> 00:31:02,070 'Cause I am super hot, and he should feel lucky 707 00:31:02,070 --> 00:31:04,172 to tap that ass. So he better behave. 708 00:31:04,172 --> 00:31:05,774 Yeah. He should do your laundry. 709 00:31:05,774 --> 00:31:08,710 Yeah, you are so hot. Like, really hot. 710 00:31:08,710 --> 00:31:10,679 Thank you. It's true. 711 00:31:12,047 --> 00:31:13,448 Okay, your turn. 712 00:31:13,515 --> 00:31:14,983 Okay. 713 00:31:14,983 --> 00:31:16,284 I'm not a dirty slut. 714 00:31:16,284 --> 00:31:19,921 Having sex with me is a religious experience. 715 00:31:19,921 --> 00:31:21,256 Yeah, it is. 716 00:31:21,256 --> 00:31:25,260 - I want a new candle. - Oh, I brought the love candle. 717 00:31:28,196 --> 00:31:29,030 Honey. 718 00:31:29,030 --> 00:31:30,498 - Thank you. - Eva. 719 00:31:30,498 --> 00:31:32,067 So sweet. 720 00:31:32,067 --> 00:31:33,334 You know, we talk about pleasing men, 721 00:31:33,334 --> 00:31:36,171 but what about pleasing us? You know what we should say? 722 00:31:36,171 --> 00:31:38,206 "Get down there and lick it. 723 00:31:38,406 --> 00:31:39,407 Lick it." 724 00:31:39,407 --> 00:31:40,842 Lick it. 725 00:31:40,842 --> 00:31:44,179 Darren never licked it. I think I'm due. 726 00:31:44,279 --> 00:31:45,547 Lick it! 727 00:31:45,547 --> 00:31:47,115 I like it. 728 00:31:47,115 --> 00:31:48,516 Lick it. 729 00:31:55,590 --> 00:31:57,158 ♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪ 730 00:31:57,158 --> 00:31:59,194 I want to see Freedom again. 731 00:31:59,194 --> 00:32:02,397 I want love and hot sex. 732 00:32:03,031 --> 00:32:12,774 ♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪ 733 00:32:13,608 --> 00:32:15,510 ♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪ 734 00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:41,536 I hope you don't think I'm easy. 735 00:32:41,536 --> 00:32:42,971 Why would I think you're easy? 736 00:32:42,971 --> 00:32:45,507 'Cause we had sex on the first date. 737 00:32:46,107 --> 00:32:47,742 I think it's weird not to have sex 738 00:32:47,742 --> 00:32:49,410 on the first date. 739 00:32:49,778 --> 00:32:50,712 Really? 740 00:32:50,712 --> 00:32:54,215 Hey, do you want to go back to my place and get stoned? 741 00:32:54,215 --> 00:32:55,083 - Uh-huh. - Yeah? 742 00:32:55,083 --> 00:33:00,421 ♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪ 743 00:33:01,756 --> 00:33:03,324 One second. 744 00:33:12,867 --> 00:33:15,904 - Want a hit? - I don't really smoke. 745 00:33:15,904 --> 00:33:18,506 - Oh, come on. Just one. - Okay. 746 00:33:22,977 --> 00:33:25,513 Yeah. 747 00:33:26,381 --> 00:33:27,949 You all right? 748 00:33:27,949 --> 00:33:28,750 Yeah. 749 00:33:28,750 --> 00:33:31,186 - You okay? - Mm-hm. Mm-hm. 750 00:33:34,289 --> 00:33:35,790 When we were together... 751 00:33:35,790 --> 00:33:38,660 could you feel that energy going back... 752 00:33:38,660 --> 00:33:40,695 and forth between our souls? 753 00:33:40,695 --> 00:33:43,231 - It felt amazing. - Yeah. Yeah. 754 00:33:43,231 --> 00:33:46,034 I don't think we even need to talk, yeah? 755 00:33:46,034 --> 00:33:47,101 Can't you just... 756 00:33:47,101 --> 00:33:50,171 - feel what I'm thinking? - Uh... 757 00:33:52,707 --> 00:33:54,375 I don't think so. 758 00:33:54,442 --> 00:33:56,444 I bet you can, yeah? 759 00:34:00,415 --> 00:34:02,217 Can you feel it now? 760 00:34:03,218 --> 00:34:06,821 - Couldn't you just tell me? - No, no, no. 761 00:34:13,294 --> 00:34:14,896 What about now? 762 00:34:19,234 --> 00:34:20,435 Now? 763 00:34:20,435 --> 00:34:23,371 I'm the most wonderful person you've ever met? 764 00:34:50,932 --> 00:34:59,073 ♪ All I could ever need Is you and I ♪ 765 00:35:08,816 --> 00:35:12,787 ♪ And all I could ever want ♪ 766 00:35:12,787 --> 00:35:16,257 ♪ All I could ever see ♪ 767 00:35:16,257 --> 00:35:19,560 ♪ All I could ever want ♪ 768 00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:26,434 ♪ All I could ever need Is you... ♪ 769 00:35:29,671 --> 00:35:33,007 ♪ Oh I choose ♪ 770 00:35:37,445 --> 00:35:41,049 ♪ And all I could ever want ♪ 771 00:35:41,049 --> 00:35:47,655 ♪ All I could ever need Is you... ♪ 772 00:35:47,922 --> 00:35:50,792 You have never done anything wrong. 773 00:35:50,892 --> 00:35:54,429 Sex is sacred and beautiful. 774 00:35:55,396 --> 00:36:01,035 ♪ All I could ever need Is you... ♪ 775 00:36:01,035 --> 00:36:05,239 What if all the sluts had mind-blowing orgasms? 776 00:36:05,239 --> 00:36:08,676 Only when they're empowered by their orgasms 777 00:36:08,676 --> 00:36:11,079 can they defeat the evil mutant. 778 00:36:12,113 --> 00:36:15,683 Empowered sluts. I like that. That's-- that's provocative. 779 00:36:15,683 --> 00:36:18,786 You think we can get that past the ratings board? 780 00:36:19,487 --> 00:36:21,189 Hey, guys, uh, 781 00:36:21,189 --> 00:36:23,224 sorry, I just downloaded this new app. 782 00:36:23,224 --> 00:36:25,460 It detects shitty movie ideas, 783 00:36:25,460 --> 00:36:28,296 and it literally led me right here. 784 00:36:28,663 --> 00:36:29,697 Anyway... 785 00:36:29,697 --> 00:36:32,066 let me know if you have any real movie ideas 786 00:36:32,066 --> 00:36:35,370 that we can turn into actual movies. 787 00:36:35,603 --> 00:36:37,839 Okay. Bye. 788 00:36:42,310 --> 00:36:43,878 Encouraging. 789 00:36:43,878 --> 00:36:45,213 Love that guy. 790 00:36:45,213 --> 00:36:47,315 Oh, I wanted to say, um, 791 00:36:47,315 --> 00:36:48,449 I-- I read your script, 792 00:36:48,449 --> 00:36:51,886 uh, about the Afghan woman who fights for the right 793 00:36:51,886 --> 00:36:54,322 to divorce her husband. That was strong. 794 00:36:54,322 --> 00:36:55,556 How did you get a copy of that? 795 00:36:55,556 --> 00:36:58,459 I got connects. You know what I'm saying? 796 00:36:58,459 --> 00:36:59,694 - Whoa. - Actually, 797 00:36:59,694 --> 00:37:01,963 Peter wanted me to, uh, write coverage. 798 00:37:01,963 --> 00:37:03,931 Oh, I thought he read that one. 799 00:37:03,931 --> 00:37:05,466 Well, I don't know. He's a busy guy. 800 00:37:05,466 --> 00:37:08,870 But I really love the scene where Afshan says, um, 801 00:37:08,870 --> 00:37:12,974 "This is my woman part to do with what I want." 802 00:37:12,974 --> 00:37:16,210 That was pretty intense. 803 00:37:16,644 --> 00:37:19,747 - You really liked it? - Yeah, it was powerful. 804 00:37:49,811 --> 00:37:52,080 I want love. 805 00:38:00,021 --> 00:38:01,355 And so mote it be. 806 00:38:01,355 --> 00:38:03,124 ♪ Ah-ooh ♪ 807 00:38:03,858 --> 00:38:05,626 ♪ Ah-ooh ♪ 808 00:38:06,661 --> 00:38:08,062 Oh, thank you, honey. 809 00:38:08,062 --> 00:38:11,432 Hi, um, I'll just take a regular coffee, please. Um, 810 00:38:11,432 --> 00:38:15,002 I'm just looking for this guy. I think he works here. 811 00:38:15,002 --> 00:38:17,472 I don't know his name, but he's 28. 812 00:38:17,472 --> 00:38:20,541 I know, 28. I know. I know. I know what you're thinking. 813 00:38:20,541 --> 00:38:22,076 Do you know who I'm talking about? 814 00:38:22,076 --> 00:38:23,511 - No. - No? 815 00:38:23,511 --> 00:38:24,479 Eva? 816 00:38:24,479 --> 00:38:26,080 - Mark! - Hi! 817 00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:27,482 Oh, my God. 818 00:38:27,482 --> 00:38:29,917 Oh, it's been so long. How are you? 819 00:38:29,917 --> 00:38:32,587 Good. I'm okay. Yeah. 820 00:38:32,587 --> 00:38:33,654 How's Darren? 821 00:38:33,654 --> 00:38:36,724 We got a divorce. He didn't tell you? 822 00:38:36,724 --> 00:38:39,427 Uh, yeah, I... I heard. 823 00:38:39,794 --> 00:38:41,762 - Sorry. - Yeah. 824 00:38:41,762 --> 00:38:44,599 Uh, Rebecca and I got divorced, too. 825 00:38:44,899 --> 00:38:46,200 I'm so sorry. 826 00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:48,769 No, actually, it's for the best. 827 00:38:48,836 --> 00:38:50,638 Plus we have two beautiful daughters, 828 00:38:50,638 --> 00:38:53,374 five and ten, so no regrets. 829 00:38:55,810 --> 00:38:57,345 - Don't you want to get a coffee? - Uh, 830 00:38:57,345 --> 00:39:00,014 yeah, yeah. That's what I'm here for. 831 00:39:00,014 --> 00:39:00,915 [CHUCKLES 832 00:39:00,915 --> 00:39:04,018 - What are you doing right now? - Uh... 833 00:39:04,485 --> 00:39:05,253 nothing. 834 00:39:05,253 --> 00:39:08,022 You want to go for a walk, catch up a little? 835 00:39:08,022 --> 00:39:10,258 Yeah, I'd really like that. 836 00:39:10,691 --> 00:39:12,460 I was making dresses in my kitchen, 837 00:39:12,460 --> 00:39:15,396 and then just, boom! You know? 838 00:39:15,396 --> 00:39:17,031 That's amazing. 839 00:39:19,033 --> 00:39:21,302 I'm sorry to hear about your divorce. Uh... 840 00:39:21,302 --> 00:39:24,972 - I feel like such a failure. - Oh, don't say that. 841 00:39:24,972 --> 00:39:26,641 I just wish we would've had kids, 842 00:39:26,641 --> 00:39:28,910 you know, like you guys, but we were 843 00:39:28,910 --> 00:39:30,611 never on the same page with that. 844 00:39:30,611 --> 00:39:33,681 Eva, you are in no way a failure. 845 00:39:33,681 --> 00:39:37,885 You're a huge, huge success in every way. 846 00:39:40,588 --> 00:39:42,223 Wow. 847 00:39:44,325 --> 00:39:45,893 Stunning. 848 00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:48,763 Thank you. It's true. 849 00:39:49,997 --> 00:39:52,900 "Thank you. It's true." I like that. 850 00:39:54,735 --> 00:39:57,004 Did you know I left the law firm? 851 00:39:57,004 --> 00:39:58,005 No. 852 00:39:58,005 --> 00:40:00,007 Yeah, you know, grew the hair out, 853 00:40:00,007 --> 00:40:01,776 stopped shaving... 854 00:40:02,076 --> 00:40:03,711 opened a restaurant. 855 00:40:03,711 --> 00:40:05,146 No way! 856 00:40:05,146 --> 00:40:07,148 Yeah. You always told me I should. 857 00:40:07,148 --> 00:40:08,716 Remember that night I made the panna cotta 858 00:40:08,716 --> 00:40:10,618 - with the aged balsamico? - Yes. 859 00:40:10,618 --> 00:40:13,621 I had, like, a food orgasm over that dessert. 860 00:40:13,621 --> 00:40:15,356 Yes, you did. 861 00:40:18,192 --> 00:40:19,994 Congratulations. 862 00:40:20,294 --> 00:40:21,696 You're amazing. 863 00:40:21,696 --> 00:40:23,231 Thank you. 864 00:40:23,397 --> 00:40:24,932 It's true. 865 00:40:27,001 --> 00:40:30,004 I feel a little lost in my life. 866 00:40:30,771 --> 00:40:32,673 - You know? - Okay. 867 00:40:32,673 --> 00:40:34,041 I don't know, like, 868 00:40:34,041 --> 00:40:34,976 why am I a success? 869 00:40:34,976 --> 00:40:37,778 I mean, is it because I make dresses? 870 00:40:38,980 --> 00:40:39,814 Um... 871 00:40:39,814 --> 00:40:42,283 yeah, I suppose everybody would say that, 872 00:40:42,283 --> 00:40:44,785 but, uh, personally? 873 00:40:47,054 --> 00:40:49,924 You're just good to be around. 874 00:40:50,424 --> 00:40:53,594 I'm always happy when I'm near you. 875 00:40:54,395 --> 00:40:57,398 That is crazy-sweet. 876 00:40:58,432 --> 00:41:00,968 And you are crazy-beautiful. 877 00:41:01,369 --> 00:41:03,037 Oh, wait. 878 00:41:03,037 --> 00:41:05,506 Oh, my God! What-- what? 879 00:41:09,644 --> 00:41:12,380 I've had a crush on you for 14 years. 880 00:41:12,380 --> 00:41:15,383 Really? Why? 881 00:41:15,650 --> 00:41:17,885 Wait, wait, wait. 882 00:41:17,885 --> 00:41:18,586 What-- what, uh, 883 00:41:18,586 --> 00:41:20,788 what are we do-- what are we doing? Because I-- 884 00:41:20,788 --> 00:41:22,156 I haven't been with anyone 885 00:41:22,156 --> 00:41:23,491 - since my husband-- - Shh. 886 00:41:23,491 --> 00:41:26,827 Um-- I would like to keep my clothes on. 887 00:41:27,161 --> 00:41:28,729 If you just-- 888 00:41:28,729 --> 00:41:30,564 Uh... God, you're-- 889 00:41:30,564 --> 00:41:31,966 Um-- Oh, my God! Wait! 890 00:41:31,966 --> 00:41:35,436 Wait a second! That's-- Oh, my God! 891 00:41:35,436 --> 00:41:38,205 Oh, my God! You're so good at this! 892 00:41:38,205 --> 00:41:39,840 I've wanted to do this since I met you. 893 00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:42,176 That's what you were thinking the whole time... 894 00:41:42,176 --> 00:41:44,945 when we met at Walmart? Are you kidding me? 895 00:41:44,945 --> 00:41:46,414 - Mm. - That's kind of weird. 896 00:41:46,414 --> 00:41:49,583 Thank you for telling me, 'cause I was, like, thinking, 897 00:41:49,583 --> 00:41:51,786 "Oh, nice guy at Walmart. 898 00:41:51,786 --> 00:41:54,822 He-- he buys, like, stuff in bulk. I get it." 899 00:41:54,822 --> 00:41:58,125 Oh. Uh... Oh, my God. Oh, God. 900 00:41:58,125 --> 00:42:00,194 Oh, God. And I then was, like, 901 00:42:00,194 --> 00:42:01,429 "Hey, you drive a Prius. 902 00:42:01,429 --> 00:42:04,131 And that's cool. You know, cool person." 903 00:42:04,131 --> 00:42:04,932 Hey, what-- what-- 904 00:42:04,932 --> 00:42:08,235 Just slow down on that bottom part. Oh, my God. 905 00:42:08,235 --> 00:42:09,470 Shut up. I'm gonna stop talking now. 906 00:42:09,470 --> 00:42:13,808 I'm not gonna talk anymore. I'm not gonna talk anymore. 907 00:42:16,043 --> 00:42:17,678 You're, like, really good at this. 908 00:42:17,678 --> 00:42:19,847 Oh, God. Wait, I didn't groom. I didn't groom! 909 00:42:19,847 --> 00:42:21,982 Ah! Okay, okay, no, actually, I'm okay with that. 910 00:42:21,982 --> 00:42:25,152 I'm okay with it. Never mind. Don't listen to me. Don't stop. 911 00:42:25,152 --> 00:42:27,521 Don't stop. 912 00:42:33,794 --> 00:42:35,529 I want love. 913 00:42:44,438 --> 00:42:45,573 Babe? 914 00:42:45,573 --> 00:42:48,275 Do you have, uh, that bag? I'm doing that lecture 915 00:42:48,275 --> 00:42:51,078 on techno-social wormholes downtown, and they're, uh-- 916 00:42:51,078 --> 00:42:53,280 they're gonna put it on YouTube. 917 00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:55,049 Isn't that great? 918 00:42:56,384 --> 00:42:58,919 I didn't have time to do your laundry. 919 00:42:58,986 --> 00:43:00,454 And... 920 00:43:01,956 --> 00:43:05,459 if you want to be with me, you can't date anybody else. 921 00:43:06,193 --> 00:43:08,162 Have you noticed that I'm great? 922 00:43:08,162 --> 00:43:09,530 'Cause you don't treat me that way. 923 00:43:09,530 --> 00:43:12,299 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where's all this coming from? 924 00:43:12,299 --> 00:43:13,334 It's coming from me. 925 00:43:13,334 --> 00:43:17,004 But you were fine with everything a few days ago. 926 00:43:17,338 --> 00:43:18,806 I take care of you. 927 00:43:18,806 --> 00:43:20,341 When are you gonna take care of me? 928 00:43:20,341 --> 00:43:23,344 Relationships are hard for me. My parents got divorced. 929 00:43:23,344 --> 00:43:24,278 Oh, God! Stop it! 930 00:43:24,278 --> 00:43:27,615 Stop using that as an excuse for everything! 931 00:43:27,615 --> 00:43:30,751 My family was fucked up, too! Let it go! 932 00:43:30,951 --> 00:43:34,722 I don't really like your tone of voice right now, honestly. 933 00:43:34,722 --> 00:43:36,657 You need to figure that out. 934 00:43:36,657 --> 00:43:40,428 Uh, well, those don't look very clean to me. 935 00:43:41,128 --> 00:43:42,563 No. 936 00:43:42,863 --> 00:43:44,832 They're very dirty. 937 00:43:45,065 --> 00:43:47,067 - What? - Yeah. 938 00:43:47,535 --> 00:43:48,569 Extremely dirty. 939 00:43:48,569 --> 00:43:51,005 - And smelly! - Babe, seriously? 940 00:43:51,005 --> 00:43:52,072 You know, you're gonna-- 941 00:43:52,072 --> 00:43:53,507 you're gonna regret this tomorrow. 942 00:43:53,507 --> 00:43:56,277 And-- and when you do, you can call me, okay? 943 00:43:56,277 --> 00:44:00,948 When you are ready to treat me like the amazing person I am, 944 00:44:00,948 --> 00:44:04,118 you call me! I won't be calling you. 945 00:44:05,085 --> 00:44:06,587 Take that! 946 00:44:06,587 --> 00:44:08,989 I was gonna wear this. I was gonna wear this. 947 00:44:08,989 --> 00:44:12,359 Now it's even more dirty. It's more dirty now. 948 00:44:12,359 --> 00:44:13,994 Pussy! 949 00:44:17,331 --> 00:44:20,768 And, uh, where am I gonna clean these? 950 00:44:21,368 --> 00:44:23,070 Do you have a place? 951 00:44:23,370 --> 00:44:26,807 Okay, you know what? Thank you. Thank you. That's great. 952 00:44:26,807 --> 00:44:28,309 Okay, we'll-- we'll talk. 953 00:44:28,309 --> 00:44:30,411 The guy shows her the beauty of her own soul 954 00:44:30,411 --> 00:44:34,114 through sexuality, and then she defeats the killer. 955 00:44:34,114 --> 00:44:35,416 Hmm. Well, I'm not sure 956 00:44:35,416 --> 00:44:37,084 how to fit that into a teenage slasher film, 957 00:44:37,084 --> 00:44:40,654 but I like the challenge. I'm gonna get cracking on it. 958 00:44:40,855 --> 00:44:43,057 Don't shoot the dinosaur. He's on your side. 959 00:44:43,057 --> 00:44:43,891 What are you guys doing? 960 00:44:43,891 --> 00:44:45,693 We're working on a video game based on the film. 961 00:44:45,693 --> 00:44:48,662 Yeah, it's really gonna boost our profits on this one. 962 00:44:48,662 --> 00:44:51,565 Peter came up with it all by himself. 963 00:44:51,565 --> 00:44:53,934 The goal of the game is to build up your empire... 964 00:44:53,934 --> 00:44:55,836 - This is my idea. - and kill as many sluts 965 00:44:55,836 --> 00:44:57,371 and douchebags that get in your way. 966 00:44:57,371 --> 00:44:58,172 That's is my idea. 967 00:44:58,172 --> 00:44:59,340 Once you reach the higher levels, 968 00:44:59,340 --> 00:45:00,608 - you'll meet a virgin... - This is my idea. 969 00:45:00,608 --> 00:45:02,243 - with special powers. - My idea. My idea. 970 00:45:02,243 --> 00:45:03,844 Every time you see a slut, 971 00:45:03,844 --> 00:45:05,246 - you can kill her... - That's my idea. 972 00:45:05,246 --> 00:45:06,380 - and get the points. - My idea. 973 00:45:06,380 --> 00:45:08,883 Sometimes I like to shoot her in the boobs or crotch area. 974 00:45:08,883 --> 00:45:10,851 The last one was his idea. 975 00:45:10,851 --> 00:45:15,990 Boom! That slut went down! 976 00:45:17,124 --> 00:45:19,126 So what do you think? 977 00:45:19,126 --> 00:45:20,261 I think it's really disturbing 978 00:45:20,261 --> 00:45:22,730 and it makes me want to, like, vomit in my mouth. 979 00:45:22,730 --> 00:45:24,798 Hey, man, I need you to go through the video game 980 00:45:24,798 --> 00:45:26,033 and make sure that all of the girls, 981 00:45:26,033 --> 00:45:27,768 under their shirts, you can see their erect nipples. 982 00:45:27,768 --> 00:45:30,471 - I need you to do that for me. - Great idea! 983 00:45:30,471 --> 00:45:31,138 So smart. 984 00:45:31,138 --> 00:45:33,140 Look, The script that John and I are writing 985 00:45:33,140 --> 00:45:34,341 is a totally different story. 986 00:45:34,341 --> 00:45:36,076 Yeah, I know, and thank God it's a different story, 987 00:45:36,076 --> 00:45:39,480 because your script sucked shit, and this video game 988 00:45:39,480 --> 00:45:40,447 is going to sell like Molly 989 00:45:40,447 --> 00:45:42,816 to a girl that doesn't talk to her parents that much, okay? 990 00:45:42,816 --> 00:45:44,351 I need you to be on nipple supervision, all right? 991 00:45:44,351 --> 00:45:46,153 You got to go through the video game and make sure 992 00:45:46,153 --> 00:45:48,188 that every girl's nipples are erect, okay? 993 00:45:48,188 --> 00:45:49,790 We're gonna go for the only demographic 994 00:45:49,790 --> 00:45:51,425 that matters, and that's teenage boys. 995 00:45:51,425 --> 00:45:53,294 Well, that's ridiculous because John and I 996 00:45:53,294 --> 00:45:54,662 are writing a great script. 997 00:45:54,662 --> 00:45:56,463 I'm sorry. That app is going off that I downloaded. 998 00:45:56,463 --> 00:45:58,365 It keeps going off when people say stupid shit. 999 00:45:58,365 --> 00:45:59,700 Uh, let me fix this. Turn it off. 1000 00:45:59,700 --> 00:46:03,504 You want to know what men really get off on? 1001 00:46:03,504 --> 00:46:04,605 No. 1002 00:46:04,605 --> 00:46:05,706 The conquest, okay? 1003 00:46:05,706 --> 00:46:07,741 Look, I'm a hunter. We're hunters. We're men. 1004 00:46:07,741 --> 00:46:11,211 I'm a man. I'm a hunter, okay? I hunted you. I got you. 1005 00:46:11,211 --> 00:46:12,713 I found you. I kept you for a little bit, 1006 00:46:12,713 --> 00:46:15,516 and then I got bored, and then you left and now I'm-- 1007 00:46:15,516 --> 00:46:18,552 I'm attracted to you again, you know? That's what works. 1008 00:46:18,552 --> 00:46:19,620 The plan worked, okay? 1009 00:46:19,620 --> 00:46:22,823 So let's just go have sex in my office. 1010 00:46:22,823 --> 00:46:24,258 No. 1011 00:46:24,625 --> 00:46:26,527 Everything you have is... 1012 00:46:27,461 --> 00:46:30,831 Turn your fucking head. What's your... What's your name? 1013 00:46:30,831 --> 00:46:31,498 Demarcus. 1014 00:46:31,498 --> 00:46:32,733 You're the whitest guy in the world, 1015 00:46:32,733 --> 00:46:37,071 and his name's fucking Demarcus. Hey, I'm DeShawn. 1016 00:46:37,371 --> 00:46:37,938 Anyway, 1017 00:46:37,938 --> 00:46:42,242 every-- everything you have is because of me. 1018 00:46:42,242 --> 00:46:44,278 But I want to be a writer. 1019 00:46:44,278 --> 00:46:45,512 Can you just make sure you supervise 1020 00:46:45,512 --> 00:46:47,514 all the nipples, please? That's what I need from you. 1021 00:46:47,514 --> 00:46:50,918 That is, if you want to get a paycheck, big boobs. 1022 00:46:55,289 --> 00:46:58,258 "I want to be a writer." 1023 00:46:59,126 --> 00:47:02,229 Mark was down there for so long. 1024 00:47:02,229 --> 00:47:04,131 I wonder what he was thinking about. 1025 00:47:04,131 --> 00:47:06,934 He was thinking: Yum, yum! 1026 00:47:06,934 --> 00:47:08,802 I feel like guys who won't go down on you 1027 00:47:08,802 --> 00:47:09,703 aren't hetero enough. 1028 00:47:09,703 --> 00:47:11,639 I mean, what would they rather be doing, 1029 00:47:11,639 --> 00:47:13,273 sucking a cock? 1030 00:47:13,340 --> 00:47:14,174 This guy sounds amazing. 1031 00:47:14,174 --> 00:47:15,709 You can totally tell the difference between a guy 1032 00:47:15,709 --> 00:47:17,411 who's into it and a guy who's not. 1033 00:47:17,411 --> 00:47:19,580 I didn't even know that I liked it that much, 1034 00:47:19,580 --> 00:47:22,983 but I haven't had sex with a lot of people. 1035 00:47:23,183 --> 00:47:24,151 It's good if a guy's good at it. 1036 00:47:24,151 --> 00:47:27,588 Otherwise, it's like sandpaper rubbing against your clitoris 1037 00:47:27,588 --> 00:47:29,556 while you lay in a pool of saliva. 1038 00:47:29,556 --> 00:47:30,858 - Ah! - Oh! 1039 00:47:30,858 --> 00:47:32,426 Well, this guy was great at it. 1040 00:47:32,426 --> 00:47:34,528 I think he could write an instruction manual 1041 00:47:34,528 --> 00:47:35,863 - on tonguemanship. - Wow! 1042 00:47:35,863 --> 00:47:38,766 - Did you have sex? - I had great sex. 1043 00:47:38,766 --> 00:47:40,734 I had the best sex of my life. 1044 00:47:40,734 --> 00:47:43,170 You guys both had great sex and I got nothing. 1045 00:47:43,170 --> 00:47:44,104 Are you going out again? 1046 00:47:44,104 --> 00:47:45,673 I don't know. What's the point? 1047 00:47:45,673 --> 00:47:47,808 - Getting head! - The best sex of your life. 1048 00:47:47,808 --> 00:47:50,144 I can't. I just look better with clothes on. 1049 00:47:50,144 --> 00:47:52,079 I don't want him to see me naked. 1050 00:47:52,079 --> 00:47:53,814 But you let him lick your naked vagina. 1051 00:47:53,814 --> 00:47:55,883 I know, but that was just one tiny section 1052 00:47:55,883 --> 00:47:58,719 down there. And-- and I had clothes on. 1053 00:47:58,719 --> 00:48:00,654 Plus, I work with models all day at work, 1054 00:48:00,654 --> 00:48:01,922 and they're in such great shape. 1055 00:48:01,922 --> 00:48:04,425 Just-- I look like crap compared to them. 1056 00:48:04,425 --> 00:48:05,826 You are hot! 1057 00:48:06,293 --> 00:48:07,394 I don't know. 1058 00:48:07,394 --> 00:48:09,029 Maybe he's too nice. 1059 00:48:09,029 --> 00:48:10,931 I'd take nice over mean any day. 1060 00:48:10,931 --> 00:48:13,567 Yeah, or commitment-phobic. 1061 00:48:14,201 --> 00:48:17,037 Let's make a pact to be with good guys only. 1062 00:48:17,037 --> 00:48:20,240 Guys who treat us great, like we deserve. 1063 00:48:20,340 --> 00:48:22,376 Yeah, good-guy pact. 1064 00:48:22,776 --> 00:48:24,344 Mark is so handsome. 1065 00:48:24,344 --> 00:48:26,246 There must be something wrong with him. 1066 00:48:26,246 --> 00:48:28,182 Or maybe I just don't know how to be with someone 1067 00:48:28,182 --> 00:48:30,918 who's so sexually giving, which means I like jerks, 1068 00:48:30,918 --> 00:48:33,587 which also means I can't be in the good-guy pact. 1069 00:48:33,587 --> 00:48:35,889 I'm gonna light a candle for you and Mark. 1070 00:48:35,889 --> 00:48:37,758 Me, too. Okay. 1071 00:48:37,758 --> 00:48:39,293 Don't forget the pact. 1072 00:48:39,293 --> 00:48:40,127 Good guys only. 1073 00:48:40,127 --> 00:48:42,162 - Good guys only. - Good guys only. 1074 00:48:42,162 --> 00:48:43,864 - Maybe sometimes a jerk? - No. 1075 00:48:43,864 --> 00:48:45,699 - No. - No? Jerk sex? 1076 00:48:45,699 --> 00:48:47,835 - No jerk sex. - Aw. 1077 00:48:57,978 --> 00:48:58,779 Oh, hey. 1078 00:48:58,779 --> 00:49:01,448 Um, thank you for sending me your script, 1079 00:49:01,448 --> 00:49:04,718 The Red Flow. I-- I thought it was hilarious. 1080 00:49:04,718 --> 00:49:06,754 - You read it? - I loved it. 1081 00:49:06,754 --> 00:49:07,755 Yeah, but will it ever be made? 1082 00:49:07,755 --> 00:49:10,724 A movie about a girl getting her period. 1083 00:49:11,158 --> 00:49:11,992 Why not? 1084 00:49:11,992 --> 00:49:14,027 You know, I really want to write a script 1085 00:49:14,027 --> 00:49:15,195 about my new friends. They're, like, 1086 00:49:15,195 --> 00:49:17,965 these modern-day witches. They're really inspiring. 1087 00:49:17,965 --> 00:49:20,267 Yes, witches, girl power. 1088 00:49:20,634 --> 00:49:22,102 Do it. 1089 00:49:22,736 --> 00:49:23,904 Have you heard about this video game 1090 00:49:23,904 --> 00:49:26,006 that Peter is doing? It is so vile. 1091 00:49:26,006 --> 00:49:27,107 Yeah, I heard about it. 1092 00:49:27,107 --> 00:49:28,609 I wish I could destroy the computers 1093 00:49:28,609 --> 00:49:32,446 or make my own video game called Sluts Fight Back. 1094 00:49:32,446 --> 00:49:35,149 I love that. "Sluts Fight Back." 1095 00:49:35,149 --> 00:49:36,784 If I was technological, I'd just put a virus 1096 00:49:36,784 --> 00:49:39,653 in the whole system and I would shut it down. 1097 00:49:39,653 --> 00:49:41,121 Well... 1098 00:49:42,489 --> 00:49:44,892 well, it's funny that you say that, 1099 00:49:44,892 --> 00:49:47,394 'cause I happen to be technological. 1100 00:50:00,073 --> 00:50:01,408 What are you doing? 1101 00:50:01,408 --> 00:50:04,244 Technological stuff. 1102 00:50:04,244 --> 00:50:06,580 We could be fired. 1103 00:50:06,580 --> 00:50:08,916 Not if no one finds out. 1104 00:50:19,293 --> 00:50:21,829 God. 1105 00:50:21,829 --> 00:50:22,963 - You're a genius. - Yeah, 1106 00:50:22,963 --> 00:50:24,431 you know what? I am a freaking genius. 1107 00:50:24,431 --> 00:50:26,533 That was awesome. 1108 00:50:26,834 --> 00:50:28,669 It was so awesome. 1109 00:50:28,669 --> 00:50:30,737 What are you doing now? You wanna-- you wanna 1110 00:50:30,737 --> 00:50:33,874 - grab something to eat? - Oh, I have plans. 1111 00:50:33,941 --> 00:50:35,242 This may or may not change your mind, 1112 00:50:35,242 --> 00:50:38,712 but aside from being a genius and a technological wizard, 1113 00:50:38,712 --> 00:50:40,948 I am also, um... 1114 00:50:41,081 --> 00:50:42,382 a really great rapper. 1115 00:50:42,382 --> 00:50:44,251 - Really? - Yeah, I'd love to show you 1116 00:50:44,251 --> 00:50:45,686 some of my hip-hop stuff. 1117 00:50:45,686 --> 00:50:47,554 - Okay. - You ready for this? 1118 00:50:47,554 --> 00:50:48,622 - Yeah. - You sure? 1119 00:50:48,622 --> 00:50:50,557 - Uh, I think so. - Mm-hmm. 1120 00:50:50,824 --> 00:50:52,226 Um... 1121 00:50:52,326 --> 00:50:54,461 ♪ You so ambitious ♪ 1122 00:50:54,461 --> 00:50:57,130 ♪ Your soul is sweet And superstitious ♪ 1123 00:50:57,130 --> 00:51:00,200 ♪ Your eyes your lip Your heart ♪ 1124 00:51:00,801 --> 00:51:04,872 ♪ They're breakin' records And the dishes ♪ 1125 00:51:04,872 --> 00:51:07,140 ♪ Mm-mm mm-mm ♪ 1126 00:51:07,140 --> 00:51:09,977 ♪ Mm-mm-mm Chicka-chicka ♪ 1127 00:51:09,977 --> 00:51:11,678 ♪ Mm-mm mm-mm ♪ 1128 00:51:11,678 --> 00:51:13,647 This goes on for, like, four minutes. 1129 00:51:13,647 --> 00:51:14,781 Wow. 1130 00:51:14,781 --> 00:51:16,950 - Don't give up your day job. - Come on! 1131 00:51:16,950 --> 00:51:19,253 - No, it was great. I loved it. - I just wanted to do it. 1132 00:51:19,253 --> 00:51:20,487 - That was brave. - I had an instinct. 1133 00:51:20,487 --> 00:51:23,156 Yeah, anyway, you got the technology smarts. 1134 00:51:23,156 --> 00:51:24,358 - Thanks, yo. - Word to your mother. 1135 00:51:24,358 --> 00:51:26,560 Word to your mother. Tell your mother I said word. 1136 00:51:26,560 --> 00:51:28,996 - See you Monday. - Bye. 1137 00:51:36,069 --> 00:51:38,272 Thanks for giving me this dress. 1138 00:51:38,272 --> 00:51:39,139 Ditto. 1139 00:51:39,139 --> 00:51:40,874 Oh, God. Okay, okay, I don't know. 1140 00:51:40,874 --> 00:51:41,942 Maybe we shouldn't go. 1141 00:51:41,942 --> 00:51:43,577 - How do I look? - You look hot! 1142 00:51:43,577 --> 00:51:45,112 You look so hot I want to have sex with you. 1143 00:51:45,112 --> 00:51:48,315 Okay, no, I just-- Oh! Would you guys stop it? 1144 00:51:48,315 --> 00:51:49,549 - Stop it! - I really wanna 1145 00:51:49,549 --> 00:51:51,084 - have sex with you. - Oh, my God, 1146 00:51:51,084 --> 00:51:52,152 you guys are weird. 1147 00:51:52,152 --> 00:51:55,222 Okay, come on. I can't do this alone. Come on. 1148 00:51:57,424 --> 00:51:58,892 Great show. 1149 00:51:58,892 --> 00:52:01,028 Does Darren have a daughter? 1150 00:52:01,028 --> 00:52:03,463 No, that's his new girlfriend. 1151 00:52:06,533 --> 00:52:07,968 Oh. 1152 00:52:08,302 --> 00:52:10,871 Oh! 1153 00:52:10,871 --> 00:52:13,373 Holy shit! 1154 00:52:13,373 --> 00:52:17,177 - Is that you? - Holy shit! 1155 00:52:17,377 --> 00:52:18,946 Is that me? 1156 00:52:19,012 --> 00:52:20,180 Oh, my God. 1157 00:52:20,180 --> 00:52:25,018 Not entirely accurate, okay? It's not 1984 down there. 1158 00:52:25,018 --> 00:52:27,387 Oh, I prefer a full bush. 1159 00:52:27,387 --> 00:52:28,455 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 1160 00:52:28,455 --> 00:52:31,425 - Hey. Hi. - Hi! 1161 00:52:31,558 --> 00:52:32,359 Oh. 1162 00:52:32,359 --> 00:52:34,828 - I'm so glad you made it. - Congratulations. 1163 00:52:34,828 --> 00:52:37,230 Thanks. Thanks. Everybody's here. 1164 00:52:37,230 --> 00:52:38,632 - Times is here. - Oh. 1165 00:52:38,632 --> 00:52:40,200 L.A. Weekly. Yeah. 1166 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:41,668 - Wow, well. - Yeah. 1167 00:52:41,668 --> 00:52:44,071 Your new art is really amazing, 1168 00:52:44,071 --> 00:52:46,740 - and interesting. - I know. I know. 1169 00:52:46,807 --> 00:52:48,942 There's-- there's a lot happening... 1170 00:52:48,942 --> 00:52:51,144 - It's powerful stuff. - with all of it. 1171 00:52:51,144 --> 00:52:53,747 I didn't get your smile exactly right, But, 1172 00:52:53,747 --> 00:52:56,149 eh, it's still great. 1173 00:52:56,149 --> 00:52:58,852 Hey. Let's have dinner on Saturday, huh? 1174 00:52:58,852 --> 00:52:59,987 - Really? - Yeah. 1175 00:52:59,987 --> 00:53:01,054 - Okay. - Great. 1176 00:53:01,054 --> 00:53:02,422 - Great. - Cool. Text you. 1177 00:53:02,422 --> 00:53:03,557 - Okay. - Okay. 1178 00:53:03,557 --> 00:53:05,225 Yeah, I got to go talk to some people. 1179 00:53:05,225 --> 00:53:07,461 Oh, okay, sure. You're busy. 1180 00:53:07,461 --> 00:53:09,863 Why is he wearing that weird hat? 1181 00:53:11,932 --> 00:53:13,100 I don't know. 1182 00:53:22,109 --> 00:53:23,810 Somebody fucked with our system! 1183 00:53:23,810 --> 00:53:25,746 I can't get this image off the screen! 1184 00:53:25,746 --> 00:53:27,280 I thought we were on a closed network! 1185 00:53:27,280 --> 00:53:29,383 Someone hacked into the program! 1186 00:53:29,383 --> 00:53:30,751 Someone with a password! 1187 00:53:30,751 --> 00:53:34,154 Uh, Peter, not to point fingers or anything... 1188 00:53:34,154 --> 00:53:36,156 Yeah, okay, look, I'm way ahead of you. 1189 00:53:36,156 --> 00:53:37,691 You're not a fucking detective, all right? 1190 00:53:37,691 --> 00:53:39,659 - Did you do this? - I can't even figure out 1191 00:53:39,659 --> 00:53:40,961 how to download the software updates 1192 00:53:40,961 --> 00:53:42,262 - on my computer. - That's true. 1193 00:53:42,262 --> 00:53:44,498 She can't fucking download the software updates 1194 00:53:44,498 --> 00:53:45,198 on her computer. 1195 00:53:45,198 --> 00:53:46,833 - What's your name? Darrell? - Demarcus. 1196 00:53:46,833 --> 00:53:49,669 - Demarcus, you're fired, dude. - Come on, man! 1197 00:53:49,669 --> 00:53:51,671 You're fired, and I'm gonna get a new nerd 1198 00:53:51,671 --> 00:53:53,774 to make this system that you can't fuck with it. 1199 00:53:53,774 --> 00:53:55,742 Hey, you're the guy who has "password" 1200 00:53:55,742 --> 00:53:56,710 as his password, man. 1201 00:53:56,710 --> 00:53:59,012 Well, why don't you fucking broadcast it on Twitter, man? 1202 00:53:59,012 --> 00:54:00,680 You're not supposed to tell people my password. 1203 00:54:00,680 --> 00:54:03,050 - I have to change it. - I can do the password. 1204 00:54:03,050 --> 00:54:05,118 You don't need to do it. I'll do it. 1205 00:54:05,118 --> 00:54:07,254 I'm gonna change it. Shit! 1206 00:54:07,254 --> 00:54:08,989 Oh, come on, man. 1207 00:54:08,989 --> 00:54:10,490 That sucks. 1208 00:54:10,490 --> 00:54:12,192 See you guys later. 1209 00:54:20,600 --> 00:54:22,202 Babe? 1210 00:54:22,836 --> 00:54:25,972 You-- you haven't returned any of my calls. 1211 00:54:26,139 --> 00:54:28,742 I've been thinking about what you said. 1212 00:54:29,976 --> 00:54:31,878 Can you please let me in? 1213 00:54:32,145 --> 00:54:35,449 - I really need to talk to you. - What do you want? 1214 00:54:35,449 --> 00:54:37,784 Can you-- can you please let me in? 1215 00:54:37,784 --> 00:54:39,553 Tell me what you want. 1216 00:54:40,687 --> 00:54:42,122 Please? 1217 00:54:44,624 --> 00:54:46,626 Look, I-- I don't know. I-- 1218 00:54:46,626 --> 00:54:48,862 This is really hard for me to say. 1219 00:54:48,962 --> 00:54:50,697 What? 1220 00:54:51,164 --> 00:54:54,634 I really liked how you bossed me around. 1221 00:54:55,235 --> 00:54:58,105 You know, I didn't think I would, but... 1222 00:54:58,305 --> 00:54:59,773 it... 1223 00:54:59,906 --> 00:55:01,875 kind of turned me on. 1224 00:55:02,242 --> 00:55:03,443 Are you serious? 1225 00:55:03,443 --> 00:55:05,412 Yeah, is that really weird? 1226 00:55:05,912 --> 00:55:07,547 Yeah, kinda. 1227 00:55:08,381 --> 00:55:11,518 Can you... boss me around some more? 1228 00:55:14,654 --> 00:55:16,022 Really? 1229 00:55:16,156 --> 00:55:17,624 Yeah. 1230 00:55:29,970 --> 00:55:31,671 Give me ten minutes. 1231 00:55:45,685 --> 00:55:48,054 I want you to do my laundry! 1232 00:55:48,054 --> 00:55:49,489 Wow. 1233 00:55:49,856 --> 00:55:51,258 Now! 1234 00:55:52,325 --> 00:55:54,194 And clean my apartment! 1235 00:55:55,929 --> 00:55:57,998 And then I want you to lick it! 1236 00:55:58,698 --> 00:56:00,967 - All right. - Crawl! 1237 00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:14,981 Eva. 1238 00:56:14,981 --> 00:56:16,650 - Hey! - Hi. 1239 00:56:16,950 --> 00:56:19,419 - How are you? - I'm good. 1240 00:56:20,220 --> 00:56:21,888 Welcome to my restaurant. 1241 00:56:21,888 --> 00:56:23,323 This place is incredible. 1242 00:56:23,323 --> 00:56:26,426 Thank you. It's true. 1243 00:56:26,793 --> 00:56:27,460 Um... 1244 00:56:27,460 --> 00:56:30,397 Rebecca got sick and couldn't find a sitter, 1245 00:56:30,397 --> 00:56:31,198 so... 1246 00:56:31,198 --> 00:56:34,301 I'd like to introduce you to my daughters. 1247 00:56:34,301 --> 00:56:36,069 Mary, Melinda... 1248 00:56:36,069 --> 00:56:37,871 - this is Eva. - Hi. 1249 00:56:37,871 --> 00:56:42,042 - I like your outfit. - Thank you. I make dresses. 1250 00:56:42,209 --> 00:56:43,643 I like princess dresses. 1251 00:56:43,643 --> 00:56:45,178 I could make you a princess dress. 1252 00:56:45,178 --> 00:56:46,880 - Would you like that? - Yes! 1253 00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:47,914 Can I have a dress? 1254 00:56:47,914 --> 00:56:50,283 - Absolutely, sweetie. - Yes. 1255 00:56:50,283 --> 00:56:54,187 What if you guys come back to my house after dinner? 1256 00:56:54,187 --> 00:56:56,656 I have lots of dresses. We could play dress-up. 1257 00:56:56,656 --> 00:56:59,226 'Cause I kind of want to hang out with these princesses. 1258 00:56:59,226 --> 00:57:00,894 They're pretty cool. 1259 00:57:01,728 --> 00:57:03,096 Mm! 1260 00:57:03,096 --> 00:57:04,664 I'm having... 1261 00:57:04,664 --> 00:57:05,999 a food orgasm right now. 1262 00:57:05,999 --> 00:57:07,834 - Oh, yeah? Good. - Oh, yeah. I am. 1263 00:57:07,834 --> 00:57:09,536 What's an orgasm? 1264 00:57:09,536 --> 00:57:13,406 - Oh, oops. I'm sorry. - Um, uh, it's, uh... 1265 00:57:13,540 --> 00:57:14,741 It's happiness. 1266 00:57:14,741 --> 00:57:16,810 - Hey. Right? - Yeah! 1267 00:57:16,810 --> 00:57:17,911 - Yeah. - How about some music? 1268 00:57:17,911 --> 00:57:19,613 - Mm-hmm. - You guys look beautiful! 1269 00:57:19,613 --> 00:57:20,880 Let's do a fashion show. 1270 00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,250 Oh, now that sounds like fun, right, girls? 1271 00:57:23,250 --> 00:57:24,284 - Yeah. - We're gonna have 1272 00:57:24,284 --> 00:57:26,419 a little catwalk. What do you say? 1273 00:57:26,419 --> 00:57:28,822 Yes! 1274 00:57:30,890 --> 00:57:32,592 Ready? Here we go. 1275 00:57:32,859 --> 00:57:35,595 ♪ Combination must be All right ♪ 1276 00:57:40,166 --> 00:57:43,403 ♪ I feel it ♪ 1277 00:57:43,570 --> 00:57:44,704 Go, big sister. 1278 00:57:44,704 --> 00:57:46,640 ♪ I feel it ♪ 1279 00:57:46,640 --> 00:57:49,542 Yay! Little miss. Go do your thing! 1280 00:57:49,542 --> 00:57:50,744 Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. 1281 00:57:50,744 --> 00:57:52,712 - Daddy, you got to go! - Yes, Daddy! 1282 00:57:52,712 --> 00:57:55,248 Oh, I don't think I need to do that, no. 1283 00:57:55,248 --> 00:57:56,082 Oh, I think you need to. 1284 00:57:56,082 --> 00:57:59,819 What is that? It looks like a violent shoulder move. 1285 00:58:01,288 --> 00:58:02,822 Yay! 1286 00:58:02,956 --> 00:58:06,226 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1287 00:58:06,793 --> 00:58:08,528 Let's go. Let's do it again. 1288 00:58:08,528 --> 00:58:11,564 Meow. Freestyle. I'm a kitty cat. 1289 00:58:11,564 --> 00:58:13,266 Oh! Meow! Meow! 1290 00:58:13,266 --> 00:58:14,601 I'm a kitty. Work, work, work! 1291 00:58:14,601 --> 00:58:18,805 - ♪ I feel it ♪ - ♪ Oh, I feel it ♪ 1292 00:58:18,805 --> 00:58:22,742 - ♪ Oh, I feel it ♪ - ♪ I feel it ♪ 1293 00:58:22,742 --> 00:58:27,280 ♪ Oh, I feel love ♪ 1294 00:58:28,982 --> 00:58:30,483 Call me... 1295 00:58:42,696 --> 00:58:45,732 - Hello? - Hi. It's me. 1296 00:58:45,732 --> 00:58:46,966 Hi. 1297 00:58:46,966 --> 00:58:48,001 Hey, what are you doing? 1298 00:58:48,001 --> 00:58:50,637 I'm just, uh, having a few people over, yeah? 1299 00:58:50,637 --> 00:58:52,238 Uh, you want to come by? 1300 00:58:52,238 --> 00:58:53,940 Feel the music! 1301 00:58:54,040 --> 00:58:54,641 Yeah. 1302 00:58:54,641 --> 00:58:57,377 - Yeah, all right. - Okay, see you soon. 1303 00:59:09,289 --> 00:59:11,024 Hey! 1304 00:59:12,125 --> 00:59:15,061 - One for everybody! - Oh! 1305 00:59:16,696 --> 00:59:18,198 You in for the next round? Yeah? 1306 00:59:18,198 --> 00:59:20,567 You-- I know you want one. 1307 00:59:23,770 --> 00:59:26,606 - Mm. - Mm-hmm. 1308 00:59:26,606 --> 00:59:28,708 Oh, it's so good to see you. 1309 00:59:28,708 --> 00:59:30,577 I'm so glad you called. 1310 00:59:30,577 --> 00:59:31,878 - You want a bump? - Oh, I'm sorry. 1311 00:59:31,878 --> 00:59:35,048 I don't do drugs. I'm a lightweight. 1312 00:59:36,316 --> 00:59:38,852 - Do you want to dance, yeah? - Sure. 1313 00:59:38,852 --> 00:59:40,553 Yeah. 1314 00:59:41,621 --> 00:59:44,557 Hey. I took too much of this tonight. You want some? 1315 00:59:44,557 --> 00:59:47,594 - Yeah, thank you. Yeah. - Yeah. Hey! 1316 00:59:47,594 --> 00:59:48,428 Mm. Try that? 1317 00:59:48,428 --> 00:59:50,563 - No, thanks. - No? 1318 00:59:51,131 --> 00:59:53,600 Ugh! 1319 00:59:54,567 --> 00:59:56,569 You know, I've been thinking about you a lot. 1320 00:59:56,569 --> 00:59:58,171 - You have? - Yeah. 1321 00:59:58,171 --> 00:59:59,439 Why haven't you called? 1322 00:59:59,439 --> 01:00:01,875 Well, look in my eyes. Tell me what I'm thinking. 1323 01:00:01,875 --> 01:00:04,344 Um, I don't know. 1324 01:00:04,344 --> 01:00:06,446 No, no! 1325 01:00:07,680 --> 01:00:10,116 Talk to me. How do you feel? 1326 01:00:11,284 --> 01:00:13,887 - I like you. - You do? 1327 01:00:13,953 --> 01:00:15,422 Yeah. 1328 01:00:15,688 --> 01:00:17,357 I love you. 1329 01:00:18,425 --> 01:00:19,959 I love you, yeah? 1330 01:00:19,959 --> 01:00:22,662 Don't you know that? Can't you tell? 1331 01:00:22,762 --> 01:00:25,098 Sometimes I can't talk unless I'm wasted. 1332 01:00:25,098 --> 01:00:26,599 Yeah, I get scared. 1333 01:00:26,599 --> 01:00:29,102 I'm gonna talk to you now, yeah? 1334 01:00:29,235 --> 01:00:30,770 I love you. 1335 01:00:31,538 --> 01:00:33,673 Oh, I love you. 1336 01:00:33,673 --> 01:00:36,776 Do you see it in my eyes? Yeah, can you feel it? 1337 01:00:36,776 --> 01:00:40,046 I love you. 1338 01:00:40,046 --> 01:00:44,951 - I love you. - I love you. Mm. Mm. 1339 01:00:47,020 --> 01:00:50,023 I love you! 1340 01:00:50,023 --> 01:00:52,025 - I love you! - I love-- 1341 01:00:59,599 --> 01:01:01,601 Oh, whoa. 1342 01:01:01,734 --> 01:01:04,304 My heart's beating really fast. 1343 01:01:05,104 --> 01:01:07,540 - Have you got a Valium? - No. 1344 01:01:07,540 --> 01:01:09,676 Xanax? 1345 01:01:10,677 --> 01:01:12,479 - NyQuil? - No. 1346 01:01:13,613 --> 01:01:16,616 No, it's all right. I'll just talk to my heart, yeah? 1347 01:01:16,616 --> 01:01:19,152 I'll make it come down, yeah. 1348 01:01:19,152 --> 01:01:20,553 Do you want me to turn the music off? 1349 01:01:20,553 --> 01:01:22,655 No, no, no, it's fine. No, I can... 1350 01:01:22,655 --> 01:01:24,791 I can do it. Yeah, I can make it. 1351 01:01:24,791 --> 01:01:26,626 Make it calm down. 1352 01:01:27,694 --> 01:01:31,197 - Do you want to have sex? - Whoa, whoa, whoa, babe, babe. 1353 01:01:31,197 --> 01:01:33,166 Sorry. That hurts, yeah? 1354 01:01:33,566 --> 01:01:36,302 Oh. 1355 01:01:36,503 --> 01:01:38,771 I've never felt that way before... 1356 01:01:38,771 --> 01:01:41,407 the way you made me feel. 1357 01:01:41,407 --> 01:01:42,809 Sex is beautiful. 1358 01:01:42,809 --> 01:01:45,044 I didn't have to feel bad about it. 1359 01:01:45,044 --> 01:01:46,513 Okay. 1360 01:01:46,713 --> 01:01:49,115 I felt really good about myself. 1361 01:01:49,115 --> 01:01:50,750 No, that's great, babe, but... 1362 01:01:50,750 --> 01:01:53,620 I don't think I can have sex right now. 1363 01:01:53,620 --> 01:01:55,622 Oh, God, I hope I don't have to go 1364 01:01:55,622 --> 01:01:57,624 to the emergency room again. 1365 01:01:57,624 --> 01:01:59,325 Oh, my God! 1366 01:01:59,526 --> 01:02:01,594 And then I made him lick it! 1367 01:02:01,594 --> 01:02:02,929 And he did the whole alphabet 1368 01:02:02,929 --> 01:02:04,998 for 45 minutes. I looked at the clock. 1369 01:02:04,998 --> 01:02:06,799 - What? - Oh, my God! 1370 01:02:06,799 --> 01:02:07,700 I know! 1371 01:02:07,700 --> 01:02:09,936 And then I made him do my laundry. 1372 01:02:09,936 --> 01:02:11,571 Now I have the power. 1373 01:02:11,571 --> 01:02:14,474 Did you ask him if he's seeing the other girls? 1374 01:02:14,474 --> 01:02:17,977 Oh, God! No, I forgot! Ugh! 1375 01:02:17,977 --> 01:02:20,179 Well, maybe your power isn't very powerful, 1376 01:02:20,179 --> 01:02:21,014 because you got him off, 1377 01:02:21,014 --> 01:02:22,715 and you didn't get what you wanted. 1378 01:02:22,715 --> 01:02:24,517 My power's very powerful. 1379 01:02:24,517 --> 01:02:26,619 Why don't you ask for what you want? 1380 01:02:26,619 --> 01:02:29,956 I try to talk to him, but it's, like... 1381 01:02:31,891 --> 01:02:34,460 Ah! Nothing comes out. 1382 01:02:34,561 --> 01:02:35,628 What is wrong with me? 1383 01:02:35,628 --> 01:02:39,232 I mean, I can talk to you guys, but I cannot talk to him. 1384 01:02:39,232 --> 01:02:41,434 It's like when I'm around him, I just... 1385 01:02:41,434 --> 01:02:43,870 He makes me so nervous that I'm not myself. 1386 01:02:43,870 --> 01:02:45,438 I'm like a unicorn. 1387 01:02:45,438 --> 01:02:47,407 Everyone knows you can't see a unicorn 1388 01:02:47,407 --> 01:02:49,309 unless you believe in them. 1389 01:02:49,309 --> 01:02:52,211 It's like he can't see how... 1390 01:02:52,211 --> 01:02:54,347 magic I really am. 1391 01:02:54,347 --> 01:02:55,748 Oh! 1392 01:02:56,416 --> 01:02:59,285 Everyone can see it. It's super obvious. 1393 01:02:59,285 --> 01:03:01,087 Yeah. 1394 01:03:03,289 --> 01:03:06,392 What if I ask him for what I want... 1395 01:03:07,727 --> 01:03:09,562 and he leaves me? 1396 01:03:10,063 --> 01:03:11,064 You should try. 1397 01:03:11,064 --> 01:03:13,399 Sometimes I don't even know what I want. 1398 01:03:13,399 --> 01:03:16,436 I think you're being too hard on yourself. 1399 01:03:16,703 --> 01:03:19,205 Okay, what candle did you bring? 1400 01:03:20,540 --> 01:03:22,208 The white candle. 1401 01:03:23,409 --> 01:03:24,944 For healing. 1402 01:03:26,045 --> 01:03:27,447 We all say... 1403 01:03:27,447 --> 01:03:29,482 "I wish to remove anything negative 1404 01:03:29,482 --> 01:03:30,917 from my life." 1405 01:03:30,917 --> 01:03:33,753 I wish to remove anything negative 1406 01:03:33,753 --> 01:03:35,355 from my life. 1407 01:03:35,455 --> 01:03:37,457 And so mote it be. 1408 01:03:48,167 --> 01:03:50,403 Oh, and I wish for a unicorn. 1409 01:03:51,871 --> 01:03:54,040 Are you dating other women? 1410 01:03:54,040 --> 01:03:56,476 Why are you talking in that weird voice? 1411 01:03:56,476 --> 01:03:57,477 I'm trying to sound powerful. 1412 01:03:57,477 --> 01:03:59,579 I thought that's what turned you on last time. 1413 01:03:59,579 --> 01:04:00,947 Yeah, it turned me on 1414 01:04:00,947 --> 01:04:02,181 that you asked for what you wanted. 1415 01:04:02,181 --> 01:04:03,783 I just never knew what you were thinking before 1416 01:04:03,783 --> 01:04:05,752 because you just always agreed with everything I said. 1417 01:04:05,752 --> 01:04:07,987 Well, I don't agree with a lot of things you say! 1418 01:04:07,987 --> 01:04:10,123 Maybe listen to me for once! 1419 01:04:10,123 --> 01:04:10,723 Okay. 1420 01:04:10,723 --> 01:04:13,593 Stop dating other women! Are you dating other women? 1421 01:04:13,593 --> 01:04:17,330 Well, there are two other women that I sometimes see. 1422 01:04:19,098 --> 01:04:21,034 Pick me and only me. 1423 01:04:22,802 --> 01:04:24,537 I'll think about it. 1424 01:04:25,405 --> 01:04:27,573 And then she uncovers her true erotic nature 1425 01:04:27,573 --> 01:04:29,008 and defeats the killer inside herself, 1426 01:04:29,008 --> 01:04:32,278 which is really her own self-limiting beliefs. 1427 01:04:32,278 --> 01:04:34,280 Wow, that sounds like a real blockbuster. 1428 01:04:34,280 --> 01:04:35,281 Well, actually, I-- I do think 1429 01:04:35,281 --> 01:04:36,749 it has potential to be a real blockbuster, 1430 01:04:36,749 --> 01:04:39,952 because what we've done here is we've-- we've satisfied 1431 01:04:39,952 --> 01:04:40,787 the demands of the genre 1432 01:04:40,787 --> 01:04:44,223 while also creating something truly original. 1433 01:04:44,524 --> 01:04:45,725 Oh, sorry, man. I almost fell asleep 1434 01:04:45,725 --> 01:04:47,927 with what you're saying, 'cause it's boring as shit. 1435 01:04:47,927 --> 01:04:49,228 Hey, do you want to have sex in the bathroom, 1436 01:04:49,228 --> 01:04:51,964 or do you want to reject me like my own mother did, huh? 1437 01:04:51,964 --> 01:04:53,166 Why did you break up with me? Huh? 1438 01:04:53,166 --> 01:04:55,401 Why did you break up with me? All I wanted to do was love you, 1439 01:04:55,401 --> 01:04:58,171 and mentor you, and help you achieve your true potential. 1440 01:04:58,171 --> 01:04:59,906 I'm sorry. I don't know what to say. 1441 01:04:59,906 --> 01:05:00,973 I hate that you're not into me. 1442 01:05:00,973 --> 01:05:02,241 It makes me so much more attracted to you. 1443 01:05:02,241 --> 01:05:03,976 And I thought you were desperate and too old 1444 01:05:03,976 --> 01:05:05,578 to bear children without birth defects. 1445 01:05:05,578 --> 01:05:07,313 Oh, that's so out of line. 1446 01:05:07,313 --> 01:05:08,748 I'm so relieved that you find me attractive, 1447 01:05:08,748 --> 01:05:10,950 but when can Linda read the script that we wrote? 1448 01:05:10,950 --> 01:05:13,886 I don't want you speaking directly to Linda anymore, 1449 01:05:13,886 --> 01:05:16,456 okay? And here's another piece of advice for you, 1450 01:05:16,456 --> 01:05:18,324 uh, your boobs are too big, okay? 1451 01:05:18,324 --> 01:05:19,625 They're too big and they're flopping around, 1452 01:05:19,625 --> 01:05:21,060 and they make you look like a bimbo, all right? 1453 01:05:21,060 --> 01:05:24,130 You look like a dummy. That's why your directing career 1454 01:05:24,130 --> 01:05:25,298 hasn't gotten off the ground yet, 1455 01:05:25,298 --> 01:05:26,632 'cause you look like a big-boobied dummy. 1456 01:05:26,632 --> 01:05:29,202 Well, that's great advice. Should I cut my boobs off 1457 01:05:29,202 --> 01:05:30,369 - so I can seem smarter? - No, 1458 01:05:30,369 --> 01:05:32,839 you shouldn't cut your boobs off, okay? 1459 01:05:32,839 --> 01:05:33,773 But what you could do is, 1460 01:05:33,773 --> 01:05:35,341 you could mash them down a little bit. You could take-- 1461 01:05:35,341 --> 01:05:39,178 You know what you could do? You could Saran Wrap them, okay? 1462 01:05:39,178 --> 01:05:41,581 I do it to my dick when I'm on vacation in France. 1463 01:05:41,581 --> 01:05:44,183 I got a big dick and it fucking goes right here 1464 01:05:44,183 --> 01:05:45,918 and I tape it here. 1465 01:05:48,588 --> 01:05:52,625 My bodacious ta-tas honor me and they honor you. 1466 01:05:52,625 --> 01:05:54,060 Should I be taking notes on some of this stuff 1467 01:05:54,060 --> 01:05:56,395 for the sexual-harassment lawsuit we're all going to? 1468 01:05:56,395 --> 01:06:00,566 Hey, don't make me load my emotional gun, okay, dude? 1469 01:06:00,566 --> 01:06:01,400 'Cause I'm one step away 1470 01:06:01,400 --> 01:06:04,103 from loading this emotional gun, dude. 1471 01:06:04,437 --> 01:06:05,905 Cool. 1472 01:06:07,507 --> 01:06:09,742 That dress looks so great on you. 1473 01:06:09,742 --> 01:06:11,144 Why are you going out with Darren again? 1474 01:06:11,144 --> 01:06:12,945 You should be going out with the licker. I mean, 1475 01:06:12,945 --> 01:06:15,014 there's no contest. You either get licked 1476 01:06:15,014 --> 01:06:15,982 or you don't. 1477 01:06:15,982 --> 01:06:18,317 I was married to Darren 1478 01:06:18,317 --> 01:06:19,452 for 14 years. 1479 01:06:19,452 --> 01:06:20,853 I have to give him another chance. 1480 01:06:20,853 --> 01:06:24,157 Yeah, you don't want him to miss out on another chance 1481 01:06:24,157 --> 01:06:25,792 of not going down on you again. 1482 01:06:25,792 --> 01:06:28,060 Okay, I just texted Mark and I made a date tonight, 1483 01:06:28,060 --> 01:06:29,829 - 10:00 p.m., Butchers & Barbers. - Oh, no! No! 1484 01:06:29,829 --> 01:06:31,898 Then I said, "Would you lick me all over after?" 1485 01:06:31,898 --> 01:06:33,032 - No! - No, I didn't say that. 1486 01:06:33,032 --> 01:06:34,634 - Give it to me. - We must enact 1487 01:06:34,634 --> 01:06:35,434 the good-guy pact. 1488 01:06:35,434 --> 01:06:37,537 Give it to me. 1489 01:06:49,282 --> 01:06:50,550 Oh, hi, babe. 1490 01:06:50,550 --> 01:06:52,919 - Hey! - Hey. Good to see you. 1491 01:06:52,919 --> 01:06:54,353 Yeah. 1492 01:06:54,353 --> 01:06:57,056 - Glad you're feeling better. - Thanks. 1493 01:06:58,124 --> 01:07:00,960 - Hey, I'm Honey. - And I'm Candy. 1494 01:07:00,960 --> 01:07:02,395 Oh. 1495 01:07:02,395 --> 01:07:03,429 All kinds of lozenges. 1496 01:07:03,429 --> 01:07:05,298 Cool. I thought it was just gonna be us tonight. 1497 01:07:05,298 --> 01:07:06,933 Yeah. Oh, of course. Of course. 1498 01:07:06,933 --> 01:07:09,335 Um, I can take it from here. 1499 01:07:10,403 --> 01:07:11,470 Don't fuck with her. 1500 01:07:11,470 --> 01:07:13,840 Okay. So it's time to go. 1501 01:07:13,840 --> 01:07:17,376 Um, I'll talk to you guys later. Let's go. 1502 01:07:17,476 --> 01:07:20,012 Don't forget your date tonight at ten. 1503 01:07:22,448 --> 01:07:23,549 You have a date? 1504 01:07:23,549 --> 01:07:24,650 -Uh- -Tonight? 1505 01:07:24,650 --> 01:07:27,386 Yes. She has a date. 1506 01:07:28,921 --> 01:07:30,690 With who? 1507 01:07:30,756 --> 01:07:32,358 Not helping. 1508 01:07:32,458 --> 01:07:34,026 Okay, come on. 1509 01:07:35,461 --> 01:07:36,929 So... 1510 01:07:37,463 --> 01:07:39,498 I don't care, but who are you dating? 1511 01:07:39,498 --> 01:07:41,434 - Uh, I'm not. I'm just-- - I don't care. 1512 01:07:41,434 --> 01:07:42,468 - I really don't care. - Okay, 1513 01:07:42,468 --> 01:07:44,904 well, I might see Mark later, because I-- I just, 1514 01:07:44,904 --> 01:07:46,539 you know, ran into him the other day. 1515 01:07:46,539 --> 01:07:49,008 - You're dating my friend Mark? - No, I'm not dating him. 1516 01:07:49,008 --> 01:07:51,878 - I said I don't care. - We-- we hung out a little bit. 1517 01:07:51,878 --> 01:07:53,913 - I don't care. - Okay. 1518 01:07:53,913 --> 01:07:55,514 I don't care. 1519 01:07:56,883 --> 01:07:59,619 - Did you fuck Mark? - What? 1520 01:07:59,719 --> 01:08:02,088 No. I mean, come on. 1521 01:08:02,088 --> 01:08:04,490 - Yes, I did. Okay. - Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1522 01:08:04,490 --> 01:08:06,125 Okay, I fucked Mark! It's none of your business! 1523 01:08:06,125 --> 01:08:07,326 You fucked my friend! How could-- 1524 01:08:07,326 --> 01:08:09,295 You fucked my friend! Of course that's my business! 1525 01:08:09,295 --> 01:08:10,596 Forget it. Forget I mentioned it. 1526 01:08:10,596 --> 01:08:11,731 How could I forget that? We got-- 1527 01:08:11,731 --> 01:08:14,033 He's my friend. We go on vacations together. 1528 01:08:14,033 --> 01:08:15,067 We went biking in Tuscany! 1529 01:08:15,067 --> 01:08:17,904 That was a horrible trip. Just forget it, okay? 1530 01:08:17,904 --> 01:08:19,205 I can't forget that you fucked my friend. 1531 01:08:19,205 --> 01:08:22,208 I don't care about Mark. I love you. I love you, honey. 1532 01:08:22,208 --> 01:08:23,643 I love you. 1533 01:08:23,643 --> 01:08:25,111 Okay? 1534 01:08:26,712 --> 01:08:28,547 Where do you want to go? 1535 01:08:28,547 --> 01:08:30,683 I don't care. Where do you want to go? 1536 01:08:30,683 --> 01:08:31,651 We'll go to Butchers & Barbers. 1537 01:08:31,651 --> 01:08:33,719 - No, we are not! Stop it. - Get in. Get in. 1538 01:08:33,719 --> 01:08:34,854 - Don't be a child. - That's exactly 1539 01:08:34,854 --> 01:08:36,155 - where we're going. - Do not be a child. 1540 01:08:36,155 --> 01:08:37,390 -I'm not being a child -Yes, you are. 1541 01:08:37,390 --> 01:08:38,925 I'm being an extremely angry adult! 1542 01:08:38,925 --> 01:08:40,459 - All right. - That's a huge difference! 1543 01:08:40,459 --> 01:08:43,496 Get it out here, 'cause we're not going there! 1544 01:08:43,496 --> 01:08:45,765 - Are you gonna open my door? - Of course I am. 1545 01:08:45,765 --> 01:08:46,899 Thank you. 1546 01:08:46,899 --> 01:08:49,635 - Oh, Mark? - Darren. 1547 01:08:49,635 --> 01:08:52,605 - Mark! - Darren. Darren. 1548 01:08:53,105 --> 01:08:55,841 I always knew you wanted to fuck my wife. 1549 01:08:56,409 --> 01:08:59,345 Whoa, uh, we're there. Uh... 1550 01:09:00,579 --> 01:09:01,714 You're right. 1551 01:09:01,714 --> 01:09:03,282 Oh, God. Um... 1552 01:09:03,282 --> 01:09:04,951 Just-- just deny it at least! 1553 01:09:04,951 --> 01:09:07,320 At least deny it for appearances! 1554 01:09:07,320 --> 01:09:09,288 For crying out loud! 1555 01:09:09,288 --> 01:09:11,757 Guess what. Is this expensive? 1556 01:09:11,757 --> 01:09:13,759 Mark! Oh, my God! 1557 01:09:13,759 --> 01:09:15,561 How do you like me now? Huh? 1558 01:09:15,561 --> 01:09:16,662 - Stop it! - Huh? 1559 01:09:16,662 --> 01:09:18,798 - Really? - Yeah! Yeah, really! 1560 01:09:19,131 --> 01:09:20,199 - Shin kicks? - Yeah. 1561 01:09:20,199 --> 01:09:22,435 - Stop it! - You know I took kung fu? 1562 01:09:22,435 --> 01:09:23,269 - Okay. - Huh? 1563 01:09:23,269 --> 01:09:25,171 He took, like, two karate-- 1564 01:09:25,171 --> 01:09:26,839 Oh, my God. 1565 01:09:27,406 --> 01:09:30,009 Oh, my God, Darren! Stop it! 1566 01:09:30,009 --> 01:09:31,377 He drank a Red Bull in the car. 1567 01:09:31,377 --> 01:09:33,045 He's really sensitive to caffeine. 1568 01:09:33,045 --> 01:09:35,014 - Time out, time out! - You're gonna hurt yourself. 1569 01:09:35,014 --> 01:09:37,917 - I'm gonna pull up the car. - Oh, wow. Big man, huh? 1570 01:09:37,917 --> 01:09:40,353 - Settle down. - Big man with the restaurant 1571 01:09:40,353 --> 01:09:41,354 and the washboard face. 1572 01:09:41,354 --> 01:09:43,489 Sensei Doug would be horrified. 1573 01:09:43,489 --> 01:09:44,991 Guess what. 1574 01:09:44,991 --> 01:09:45,858 Ask her who she wants. 1575 01:09:45,858 --> 01:09:47,727 - Oh, I'm not doing that. - No, ask her who she wants. 1576 01:09:47,727 --> 01:09:50,796 - Who do you want? - I am not gonna answer that. 1577 01:09:50,796 --> 01:09:53,299 You have to 1578 01:09:53,399 --> 01:09:55,001 choose. This... 1579 01:09:55,334 --> 01:09:56,869 or "Thor." 1580 01:10:09,715 --> 01:10:11,617 - Hey. - Hey. 1581 01:10:11,751 --> 01:10:15,054 You came. I'm glad you called me back. 1582 01:10:16,288 --> 01:10:17,656 I missed you. 1583 01:10:17,656 --> 01:10:20,760 - You look really beautiful. - Thank you. 1584 01:10:20,760 --> 01:10:24,163 Have you thought more about monogamy? 1585 01:10:24,230 --> 01:10:28,067 Ah, you really love that word. Can we talk about that later? 1586 01:10:28,067 --> 01:10:30,036 I mean, this is a really important party. 1587 01:10:30,036 --> 01:10:33,372 I want to talk about it now. 1588 01:10:33,372 --> 01:10:34,974 That's... 1589 01:10:35,074 --> 01:10:36,208 Oh. 1590 01:10:36,208 --> 01:10:37,243 That's Steve Evans. 1591 01:10:37,243 --> 01:10:40,546 That's the guy that picks all the, uh, the TED speakers. 1592 01:10:40,546 --> 01:10:42,381 I got to talk to him. 1593 01:10:42,381 --> 01:10:44,583 - Now? - Yeah, come on. 1594 01:10:50,756 --> 01:10:54,994 Steve. Hey, how are you, man? 1595 01:10:54,994 --> 01:10:55,761 Daniel Peters, 1596 01:10:55,761 --> 01:10:58,364 - from the-- from the emails. - From the emails. 1597 01:10:58,364 --> 01:10:59,265 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1598 01:10:59,265 --> 01:11:00,766 - Isn't that great? - Yeah. 1599 01:11:00,766 --> 01:11:04,203 We got to get together, man. You know, we've been, uh... 1600 01:11:05,905 --> 01:11:07,306 Oh, this is Candy. 1601 01:11:07,306 --> 01:11:08,207 Hi. 1602 01:11:08,207 --> 01:11:10,409 - Hey. - Is this your girlfriend? 1603 01:11:10,409 --> 01:11:11,644 - No! - Yeah. 1604 01:11:11,644 --> 01:11:12,445 I'm a free agent. 1605 01:11:12,445 --> 01:11:14,613 I'm interested in making lots of sexual connections, 1606 01:11:14,613 --> 01:11:17,316 because I can't be tied down by monogamy. 1607 01:11:17,316 --> 01:11:19,552 Really? 1608 01:11:20,152 --> 01:11:21,754 Interesting. 1609 01:11:21,821 --> 01:11:23,089 What do you do, Candy? 1610 01:11:23,089 --> 01:11:27,426 I study the significance of ritual, 1611 01:11:27,426 --> 01:11:28,994 and also I hate monogamy! 1612 01:11:28,994 --> 01:11:31,764 Give me some casual sex, please! 1613 01:11:31,764 --> 01:11:33,365 Me, too! 1614 01:11:33,365 --> 01:11:34,767 Yeah, yeah, that's great. 1615 01:11:34,767 --> 01:11:37,636 - Yeah, that's fun. - Oh, Daniel, you have... 1616 01:11:37,703 --> 01:11:39,038 fascinating friends. 1617 01:11:39,038 --> 01:11:41,006 Well, she's-- It's more than a friend, 1618 01:11:41,006 --> 01:11:41,841 - so-- - Am I? 1619 01:11:41,841 --> 01:11:44,343 I would love to learn more, uh, about this. 1620 01:11:44,343 --> 01:11:46,278 Can I... Could I get your number? 1621 01:11:46,278 --> 01:11:48,380 - Sure, Steve. - Hang on a minute. 1622 01:11:48,380 --> 01:11:49,682 - Listen-- - It's good. I got my phone. 1623 01:11:49,682 --> 01:11:51,217 - I can connect you. - I got my phone. It's good. 1624 01:11:51,217 --> 01:11:53,719 I can probably connect you guys on an email. 1625 01:11:53,719 --> 01:11:54,920 Just type it in yourself? 1626 01:11:54,920 --> 01:11:56,755 And is it Candy with an I or a Y? 1627 01:11:56,755 --> 01:11:58,657 - With a Y. - Oh, why not? 1628 01:11:58,657 --> 01:12:02,194 Oh. Why-- why would it be with an I, you know? 1629 01:12:02,194 --> 01:12:03,429 You guys are all handsome guys. 1630 01:12:03,429 --> 01:12:04,864 You know what I'm talking about. It's the fast-paced 1631 01:12:04,864 --> 01:12:06,565 Hollywood lifestyle. You know how many girls 1632 01:12:06,565 --> 01:12:08,567 I've had sex with? 21. 1633 01:12:08,567 --> 01:12:09,568 And I'm only 35. 1634 01:12:09,568 --> 01:12:10,503 And I've eaten 12 pussies, 1635 01:12:10,503 --> 01:12:13,305 most of them on the girls I've fucked. Hey! 1636 01:12:13,439 --> 01:12:14,540 Hey. 1637 01:12:14,540 --> 01:12:15,774 I got your text. 1638 01:12:15,774 --> 01:12:17,710 One second, guys. I'll be right back. 1639 01:12:17,710 --> 01:12:20,212 Follow me. I got to piss out of my cock. 1640 01:12:20,212 --> 01:12:21,147 Did Linda read my script? 1641 01:12:21,147 --> 01:12:23,949 Uh, yeah, she agreed with a few things about it, 1642 01:12:23,949 --> 01:12:26,118 so, uh, I got rid of her. 1643 01:12:26,318 --> 01:12:27,820 You got rid of her? 1644 01:12:27,820 --> 01:12:29,155 Yeah. And, uh, it turns out 1645 01:12:29,155 --> 01:12:30,823 I got some new financiers for the movie, 1646 01:12:30,823 --> 01:12:33,425 so it doesn't matter what Linda thinks. 1647 01:12:33,893 --> 01:12:35,427 Oh, plus... 1648 01:12:35,427 --> 01:12:37,096 you're fired. 1649 01:12:38,297 --> 01:12:39,265 Well, great, 'cause I quit. 1650 01:12:39,265 --> 01:12:41,066 And I'm gonna write my own movie about a woman 1651 01:12:41,066 --> 01:12:44,703 having a religious orgasm. And no one stabs her in the ass. 1652 01:12:44,703 --> 01:12:46,839 First of all, you can't quit after I fire you, so... 1653 01:12:46,839 --> 01:12:49,175 A person can be smart and have big boobs. 1654 01:12:49,175 --> 01:12:50,843 And people are gonna watch my movie 1655 01:12:50,843 --> 01:12:53,012 and people are gonna love it! 1656 01:12:53,679 --> 01:12:56,248 No one respects you, big boobs. 1657 01:12:56,315 --> 01:12:57,750 Uh... 1658 01:12:58,751 --> 01:13:01,187 You know, I used to want to be you. 1659 01:13:01,253 --> 01:13:03,956 But all the success in the world doesn't make you happy, 1660 01:13:03,956 --> 01:13:05,357 does it? 1661 01:13:07,059 --> 01:13:09,795 I have friends and you don't have any friends, 1662 01:13:09,795 --> 01:13:11,397 and I'm happy. 1663 01:13:12,798 --> 01:13:15,267 Yeah, I guess, you know what, maybe I'm not so happy 1664 01:13:15,267 --> 01:13:16,835 in my life. 1665 01:13:18,237 --> 01:13:20,005 Maybe if we had sex in this bathroom, 1666 01:13:20,005 --> 01:13:20,973 I might be happy about that, 1667 01:13:20,973 --> 01:13:23,242 so why don't you get on your knees, baby? 1668 01:13:24,143 --> 01:13:25,678 Fuck you. 1669 01:13:35,321 --> 01:13:37,156 Oh. Oh. 1670 01:13:37,489 --> 01:13:38,924 Oh, wow. 1671 01:13:40,693 --> 01:13:42,494 I'm sorry you didn't come. 1672 01:13:44,263 --> 01:13:46,265 You know what I love about you? 1673 01:13:46,732 --> 01:13:48,934 You're so comforting, you know? 1674 01:13:49,201 --> 01:13:50,903 Here's the thing... 1675 01:13:51,470 --> 01:13:52,905 Sex dies... 1676 01:13:52,905 --> 01:13:54,807 in every relationship. 1677 01:13:56,141 --> 01:13:57,643 So maybe we should be together. 1678 01:13:57,643 --> 01:13:59,078 - What? - I'm-- I'm just-- 1679 01:13:59,078 --> 01:14:01,614 I'm losing my passion for Chandra, you know? 1680 01:14:01,614 --> 01:14:02,781 - Oh. - You know, I just don't want 1681 01:14:02,781 --> 01:14:04,383 - anyone to get hurt. - Oh my God, 1682 01:14:04,383 --> 01:14:06,619 Chandra broke up with you. That's why you're here. 1683 01:14:06,619 --> 01:14:09,488 No, she's following One Direction for a while. 1684 01:14:09,488 --> 01:14:10,756 Oh, perfect! 1685 01:14:10,756 --> 01:14:13,292 - That's so perfect! - I know. 1686 01:14:13,292 --> 01:14:15,127 I'm a cliché. But... 1687 01:14:15,127 --> 01:14:18,197 the handsome guy runs off with a younger, hot, 1688 01:14:18,197 --> 01:14:21,400 sexy, fit, tight little girl, 1689 01:14:21,400 --> 01:14:22,434 and then he gets bored, 1690 01:14:22,434 --> 01:14:24,603 and he wants to come running home to mommy. 1691 01:14:24,603 --> 01:14:27,640 EVA 1692 01:14:29,275 --> 01:14:30,075 Mommy? 1693 01:14:30,075 --> 01:14:31,510 Uh, I'm not your mommy, okay? 1694 01:14:31,510 --> 01:14:34,213 Okay, you don't understand. Here's the thing. 1695 01:14:34,213 --> 01:14:35,981 I'm saving... 1696 01:14:36,048 --> 01:14:37,750 my sexual energy... 1697 01:14:38,651 --> 01:14:39,351 for my art. 1698 01:14:39,351 --> 01:14:40,719 Here's the thing. Here's the thing. 1699 01:14:40,719 --> 01:14:42,921 I think maybe sex doesn't die for everyone. 1700 01:14:42,921 --> 01:14:45,658 It just has died for you and your weird dick. 1701 01:14:45,658 --> 01:14:47,426 - And Mark couldn't wait... - Stop it. Stop it. 1702 01:14:47,426 --> 01:14:49,762 to go down on me. He fucking loved going down, 1703 01:14:49,762 --> 01:14:50,963 - and I loved it! - Oh, stop. Ew. Ew. Ew. 1704 01:14:50,963 --> 01:14:53,432 - Oh, no, see, that says it all. - First of all, ew. 1705 01:14:53,432 --> 01:14:55,267 - "Ew." - Ew. Ew. 1706 01:14:55,267 --> 01:14:56,435 You asked him to go down on you. 1707 01:14:56,435 --> 01:14:59,872 No, I didn't ask him! He asked me! He begged me! 1708 01:14:59,872 --> 01:15:00,773 - Oh, my God. - Mm-hmm. 1709 01:15:00,773 --> 01:15:02,508 - What an asshole. - That's what he said. 1710 01:15:02,508 --> 01:15:03,676 - Stop. That's not-- Stop it. - He did. 1711 01:15:03,676 --> 01:15:06,245 He said I had a beautiful butthole. Ha-ha! 1712 01:15:07,012 --> 01:15:10,883 - You want a line? - No, thanks. I'm fine. 1713 01:15:12,985 --> 01:15:15,454 Oh! 1714 01:15:19,458 --> 01:15:21,460 Are you a drug addict? 1715 01:15:22,294 --> 01:15:24,029 Why would you ask that? 1716 01:15:24,296 --> 01:15:25,831 No reason. 1717 01:15:27,366 --> 01:15:30,602 No. Look, that's just a piece of art, yeah? 1718 01:15:30,602 --> 01:15:33,739 It's a piece of art about a feeling, you know? 1719 01:15:33,739 --> 01:15:36,809 Just a feeling some people make me feel. 1720 01:15:37,242 --> 01:15:38,610 So there's a lot of other people 1721 01:15:38,610 --> 01:15:39,578 who think you're a drug addict? 1722 01:15:39,578 --> 01:15:43,015 No. No, I just like to party and have a good time is all, 1723 01:15:43,015 --> 01:15:43,615 yeah? 1724 01:15:43,615 --> 01:15:45,217 Who else thinks you're a drug addict? 1725 01:15:45,217 --> 01:15:49,288 Look, just my stupid family. 1726 01:15:49,288 --> 01:15:49,988 Your family? 1727 01:15:49,988 --> 01:15:51,690 Yeah, look, just 'cause they give me money, 1728 01:15:51,690 --> 01:15:55,427 it makes them think they got the right to judge me, yeah? 1729 01:15:55,728 --> 01:15:57,930 But come on. Let's get some food. 1730 01:15:57,930 --> 01:16:00,999 Why does your family think you're a drug addict? 1731 01:16:02,768 --> 01:16:04,303 I'm Freedom, yeah? 1732 01:16:04,303 --> 01:16:07,072 I'm free from family shackles. 1733 01:16:08,240 --> 01:16:09,775 Stop doing drugs. 1734 01:16:09,775 --> 01:16:11,443 I'll help you. 1735 01:16:15,180 --> 01:16:16,782 I love you. 1736 01:16:18,984 --> 01:16:21,854 Yeah, I-- I love you so much. 1737 01:16:22,321 --> 01:16:24,123 And I've been thinking, yeah? I-- 1738 01:16:24,123 --> 01:16:26,525 I've got to get out of this city for a while... 1739 01:16:26,525 --> 01:16:30,162 'cause sometimes a man, he needs to go on walkabout. 1740 01:16:30,162 --> 01:16:32,297 I've got these big mountains to climb, yeah? 1741 01:16:32,297 --> 01:16:35,834 A man, he needs to be able to climb his mountains, yeah? 1742 01:16:36,101 --> 01:16:36,902 Do you understand? 1743 01:16:36,902 --> 01:16:38,971 Not really. Are you talking about real mountains, or-- 1744 01:16:38,971 --> 01:16:42,274 I'm talking about the mountains that only a real man can climb, 1745 01:16:42,274 --> 01:16:44,710 yeah? 'Cause that's-- that's me. 1746 01:16:44,843 --> 01:16:46,378 I'm a man. 1747 01:16:47,813 --> 01:16:49,314 Can I come with you? 1748 01:16:49,314 --> 01:16:50,115 No. 1749 01:16:50,115 --> 01:16:53,285 No, I've got wars to fight. Do you see? 1750 01:16:54,286 --> 01:16:56,455 Hey, maybe we'll reunite, yeah? 1751 01:16:56,522 --> 01:16:58,090 In, like, five years. 1752 01:16:58,090 --> 01:16:59,491 Five years? 1753 01:16:59,491 --> 01:17:00,993 Yeah. 1754 01:17:01,593 --> 01:17:03,429 Come on, look in my eyes. 1755 01:17:04,396 --> 01:17:06,165 What am I thinking? 1756 01:17:07,166 --> 01:17:08,167 I don't know. 1757 01:17:08,167 --> 01:17:11,069 Can two people ever really be together? 1758 01:17:11,403 --> 01:17:14,273 And once they're together, can they ever really be apart? 1759 01:17:14,273 --> 01:17:15,974 These feelings... 1760 01:17:16,275 --> 01:17:18,777 they'll always exist inside us. 1761 01:17:20,746 --> 01:17:23,515 Maybe I'll come back for you one day. 1762 01:17:24,049 --> 01:17:25,751 But maybe not. 1763 01:17:26,385 --> 01:17:27,853 And remember... 1764 01:17:27,853 --> 01:17:30,422 I left you better than I found you. 1765 01:17:35,661 --> 01:17:37,896 "I left you better than I found you"? 1766 01:17:37,896 --> 01:17:40,232 And then he went off to climb mountains. 1767 01:17:40,232 --> 01:17:42,000 Probably mountains of cocaine. 1768 01:17:42,000 --> 01:17:44,770 How can I have the amazing sex again? 1769 01:17:44,770 --> 01:17:46,371 I think he was the one. 1770 01:17:46,371 --> 01:17:49,241 No, he's not the one. You're the one. 1771 01:17:49,241 --> 01:17:52,211 You're the only one that matters. 1772 01:17:52,311 --> 01:17:54,079 These candles are dangerous. 1773 01:17:54,079 --> 01:17:54,913 And they don't work! 1774 01:17:54,913 --> 01:17:57,483 Let's do a spell for the power to make our dreams come true. 1775 01:17:57,483 --> 01:18:00,352 We don't have power. We have low self-esteem. 1776 01:18:00,352 --> 01:18:01,653 Okay, don't say that. 1777 01:18:01,653 --> 01:18:04,122 - Ah! The candles! - Stop it. 1778 01:18:04,122 --> 01:18:07,125 Only a stupid idiot would believe in a magic candle. 1779 01:18:07,125 --> 01:18:07,926 I believe in them. 1780 01:18:07,926 --> 01:18:09,294 That's 'cause you live in a fantasy world. 1781 01:18:09,294 --> 01:18:10,462 - What is going on? - Look, 1782 01:18:10,462 --> 01:18:11,930 I paid a lot of money for your candles 1783 01:18:11,930 --> 01:18:14,366 and I'm gonna sue you for false advertising! 1784 01:18:14,366 --> 01:18:15,567 I bought them from a candle emporium. 1785 01:18:15,567 --> 01:18:17,636 - They're not magic. - I hate the candles! 1786 01:18:17,636 --> 01:18:18,804 - No! - Whoa, calm down! 1787 01:18:18,804 --> 01:18:20,339 You guys all have your periods, right? That's-- 1788 01:18:20,339 --> 01:18:22,307 The candles suck! All right, you know, 1789 01:18:22,307 --> 01:18:24,309 this is your friend. You are fired. 1790 01:18:24,309 --> 01:18:26,178 Oh! I quit! 1791 01:18:26,345 --> 01:18:27,746 She's not my friend! 1792 01:18:27,746 --> 01:18:29,047 'Cause I'm not friends with people 1793 01:18:29,047 --> 01:18:31,316 that think I'm stupid. 1794 01:18:32,351 --> 01:18:34,720 And we're not on our periods! 1795 01:18:36,722 --> 01:18:40,025 I mean, to be fair, I am on my period. 1796 01:18:40,025 --> 01:18:42,528 It's towards the end of my cycle. 1797 01:18:43,262 --> 01:18:45,597 It's only a matter of time for the rest of them, right? 1798 01:18:45,597 --> 01:18:47,599 - Would you just stop? - Okay. 1799 01:19:19,197 --> 01:19:21,733 You okay? 1800 01:19:21,833 --> 01:19:24,469 - Not really. - You know what? 1801 01:19:25,037 --> 01:19:26,772 Screw this place. 1802 01:19:29,841 --> 01:19:31,276 Hey. 1803 01:19:31,710 --> 01:19:35,547 Working with you has been the best part of my job. 1804 01:19:37,549 --> 01:19:38,684 You know, I wanted to be the voice 1805 01:19:38,684 --> 01:19:42,421 of modern feminism, but I'm a loser. 1806 01:19:42,487 --> 01:19:43,055 And I... 1807 01:19:43,055 --> 01:19:44,656 don't think my friends will ever talk to me again, 1808 01:19:44,656 --> 01:19:45,691 'cause I took a big crap on them 1809 01:19:45,691 --> 01:19:48,093 and then I crapped in front of them. 1810 01:19:48,927 --> 01:19:50,095 I took an emotional shit. 1811 01:19:50,095 --> 01:19:53,832 Everything's gonna be okay. I believe in you, yo. 1812 01:19:53,832 --> 01:19:56,468 And you do have a feminist voice. 1813 01:19:56,468 --> 01:19:57,970 You're the full package. 1814 01:19:57,970 --> 01:20:00,973 I think you're a package and a half. 1815 01:20:00,973 --> 01:20:02,774 - I'm a package and a half? - Yeah. 1816 01:20:02,774 --> 01:20:05,611 I'd even go so far as saying you're two packages. 1817 01:20:05,611 --> 01:20:08,113 That's the nicest thing that anyone's ever said to me. 1818 01:20:08,113 --> 01:20:10,649 That's the nicest thing I've ever said. 1819 01:20:12,317 --> 01:20:13,752 Huh. 1820 01:20:27,132 --> 01:20:28,767 Hello. I'm looking for the special unicorn lady 1821 01:20:28,767 --> 01:20:31,937 who lives in this apartment and is very magical. 1822 01:20:31,937 --> 01:20:34,106 Oh. Leave me alone. 1823 01:20:34,106 --> 01:20:36,508 I'm living in my fantasy world. 1824 01:20:37,042 --> 01:20:38,844 I'm sorry I was a jerk. 1825 01:20:38,977 --> 01:20:40,746 I really miss you. 1826 01:20:43,315 --> 01:20:44,783 Wow. 1827 01:20:45,050 --> 01:20:47,853 I can't believe you did this. Thanks. 1828 01:20:47,853 --> 01:20:49,221 Don't thank me. It's the candles. 1829 01:20:49,221 --> 01:20:51,056 - They really work. - Stop making fun of me. 1830 01:20:51,056 --> 01:20:55,527 I'm not. My life was depressing without your magic spells. 1831 01:20:55,594 --> 01:20:56,828 Thank you. It's true. 1832 01:20:56,828 --> 01:20:58,397 Listen, I have a great idea. 1833 01:21:04,336 --> 01:21:07,706 All right, the factory in Jakarta's running behind. 1834 01:21:09,174 --> 01:21:10,342 Can we sell the magical candles 1835 01:21:10,342 --> 01:21:11,877 in your store and use the profits 1836 01:21:11,877 --> 01:21:12,711 to pay Candy's rent? 1837 01:21:12,711 --> 01:21:16,581 I don't know. Maybe I have too much low self-esteem. 1838 01:21:16,815 --> 01:21:18,583 I'm sorry that I projectile-vomited 1839 01:21:18,583 --> 01:21:19,551 my low self-esteem onto you, 1840 01:21:19,551 --> 01:21:22,320 and I promise to swallow it back down next time. 1841 01:21:22,320 --> 01:21:23,455 Ew. 1842 01:21:23,455 --> 01:21:25,223 That is the grossest analogy. 1843 01:21:25,223 --> 01:21:30,228 - Yes, you can sell candles here. - Thank you. 1844 01:21:30,762 --> 01:21:32,998 You guys look really cute. 1845 01:21:32,998 --> 01:21:34,433 - We're witches. - Oh! 1846 01:21:34,433 --> 01:21:36,535 I thought you were, like, mean cowgirls. 1847 01:21:36,535 --> 01:21:38,070 Witches. It's better. It's better. 1848 01:21:38,070 --> 01:21:40,205 Come see. We'll set up over here. 1849 01:21:41,640 --> 01:21:42,974 A lot of people are gonna tell you 1850 01:21:42,974 --> 01:21:44,176 you can't do things in your life, 1851 01:21:44,176 --> 01:21:46,078 and I'm here to tell you that you can. 1852 01:21:46,078 --> 01:21:47,612 Believe in yourself. 1853 01:21:47,612 --> 01:21:51,049 And remember how amazing you really are. 1854 01:21:54,319 --> 01:21:56,388 Oh! We sold so many. 1855 01:21:56,388 --> 01:21:58,356 Wow, witches are, like, the new vampires. 1856 01:21:58,356 --> 01:22:01,727 It's shocking how many people are buying these things. 1857 01:22:01,727 --> 01:22:04,629 The two children's dresses we made came in. 1858 01:22:04,629 --> 01:22:06,798 What do you want to do with them? 1859 01:22:06,798 --> 01:22:08,166 Oh. 1860 01:22:08,166 --> 01:22:09,601 What's happening with Mark? 1861 01:22:09,601 --> 01:22:12,003 We broke up. I forgot the good-guy pact 1862 01:22:12,003 --> 01:22:15,674 and I chose Darren. And I really regret it. 1863 01:22:15,674 --> 01:22:16,842 You gotta give those little girls 1864 01:22:16,842 --> 01:22:18,276 - their dresses. - I'm pretty sure 1865 01:22:18,276 --> 01:22:21,046 he never wants to see me again. 1866 01:22:22,414 --> 01:22:24,883 Fine. What do you think? Maybe not, right? 1867 01:22:24,883 --> 01:22:26,818 Oh, my God! 1868 01:22:26,818 --> 01:22:28,887 That look. Jeez. 1869 01:22:28,887 --> 01:22:30,756 All right. Okay. 1870 01:22:37,129 --> 01:22:39,765 He didn't come, so there you go. 1871 01:22:40,232 --> 01:22:41,099 Not home, right? 1872 01:22:41,099 --> 01:22:43,101 Oh, God. 1873 01:22:43,802 --> 01:22:46,404 Uh, hi. How are you? Um... 1874 01:22:47,339 --> 01:22:51,143 I know you probably don't want to see me. Um... 1875 01:22:51,143 --> 01:22:53,945 I made dresses for your daughters. 1876 01:22:55,347 --> 01:22:56,915 Nice. Thank you. 1877 01:22:58,216 --> 01:22:59,484 I'm sorry. 1878 01:22:59,484 --> 01:23:02,354 I'm so sorry I sabotaged our relationship. 1879 01:23:02,354 --> 01:23:05,157 And I'm sorry I treated you so badly 1880 01:23:05,157 --> 01:23:08,827 when you're just, like, the greatest guy. 1881 01:23:09,227 --> 01:23:11,463 Thanks for saying that, but, uh... 1882 01:23:11,463 --> 01:23:14,533 I don't think we should see each other anymore. 1883 01:23:17,669 --> 01:23:18,270 Um... 1884 01:23:18,270 --> 01:23:20,939 for what it's worth, I broke up with Darren... 1885 01:23:21,006 --> 01:23:22,507 for good. 1886 01:23:23,208 --> 01:23:24,442 Just... 1887 01:23:24,442 --> 01:23:26,878 I don't think I liked myself enough 1888 01:23:26,878 --> 01:23:28,980 to choose a good guy. 1889 01:23:29,748 --> 01:23:31,850 I didn't think I deserved it. 1890 01:23:31,850 --> 01:23:32,751 Eva! 1891 01:23:32,751 --> 01:23:34,820 - Hey, sweetie! - Hey, Eva. 1892 01:23:34,820 --> 01:23:35,754 I made you dresses. 1893 01:23:35,754 --> 01:23:39,291 Yay! Come in! Evie, Evie, Evie! 1894 01:23:44,062 --> 01:23:45,697 Yes! 1895 01:23:46,631 --> 01:23:50,769 I like the dress. I'm having an orgasm. 1896 01:23:57,475 --> 01:24:00,412 ♪ I feel it ♪ 1897 01:24:01,546 --> 01:24:05,050 ♪ I feel it ♪ 1898 01:24:05,317 --> 01:24:08,920 ♪ I feel it ♪ 1899 01:24:08,920 --> 01:24:12,724 ♪ I feel love ♪ 1900 01:24:13,792 --> 01:24:16,228 Who knew getting a divorce could be so great? 1901 01:24:16,228 --> 01:24:18,897 - Yeah. - What's going on with Daniel? 1902 01:24:18,897 --> 01:24:22,300 Nothing! That's why we need a super-powerful spell. 1903 01:24:22,300 --> 01:24:25,103 I think we should call on all the elements to help us. 1904 01:24:25,103 --> 01:24:26,471 - Honey, are you in? - I'm so in. 1905 01:24:26,471 --> 01:24:28,173 In fact, I'm gonna call on the elements. 1906 01:24:28,173 --> 01:24:29,407 What are the elements? 1907 01:24:29,407 --> 01:24:31,009 Uh, Earth. 1908 01:24:31,009 --> 01:24:33,378 Okay, Earth. Earth. Okay. 1909 01:24:33,378 --> 01:24:34,746 I am going to-- I don't know, 1910 01:24:34,746 --> 01:24:38,383 I'm going to call on the Earth and-- Is that really dorky? 1911 01:24:38,383 --> 01:24:39,618 - No, no, no! - No, it's amazing! 1912 01:24:39,618 --> 01:24:42,354 - I'm gonna walk on it. Why not? - Okay. 1913 01:24:42,354 --> 01:24:44,222 What's up, earth? 1914 01:24:44,222 --> 01:24:45,423 Okay, what's another element? 1915 01:24:45,423 --> 01:24:48,393 - Uh, wind. - Okay, what about... 1916 01:24:50,495 --> 01:24:53,164 - Would incense count? - Yeah! 1917 01:24:53,265 --> 01:24:55,800 - Sure. - All right. Um... 1918 01:24:55,800 --> 01:24:57,269 we call on the wind. 1919 01:25:00,772 --> 01:25:03,275 - Am I imagining that? - No. 1920 01:25:03,275 --> 01:25:05,844 - Wow, so cool! - So cool! 1921 01:25:05,844 --> 01:25:10,015 Okay, what about water? Here. Drink your drinks. 1922 01:25:13,785 --> 01:25:15,553 I call on water! 1923 01:25:20,725 --> 01:25:22,761 Guys, we made it rain. 1924 01:25:23,295 --> 01:25:25,297 Candles are fire. 1925 01:25:25,730 --> 01:25:27,599 Purple for power. 1926 01:25:27,599 --> 01:25:29,601 The power to get what we want. 1927 01:25:30,869 --> 01:25:32,504 Say your wishes. 1928 01:25:32,570 --> 01:25:34,339 I wish to like myself. 1929 01:25:34,339 --> 01:25:36,975 - So mote it be. - So mote it be. 1930 01:25:37,609 --> 01:25:41,813 I wish to know that I deserve the good things in life. 1931 01:25:41,813 --> 01:25:43,915 So mote it be. 1932 01:25:46,651 --> 01:25:48,186 I wish for love... 1933 01:25:48,186 --> 01:25:49,688 and money. 1934 01:25:49,688 --> 01:25:51,856 - So mote it be. - So mote it be. 1935 01:25:52,090 --> 01:25:56,161 We ask the elements to help us with our hearts' desires. 1936 01:25:56,861 --> 01:25:58,330 This... 1937 01:25:58,630 --> 01:26:00,365 or something better. 1938 01:26:00,432 --> 01:26:04,736 ♪ All I could ever need Is you ♪ 1939 01:26:06,504 --> 01:26:10,442 If you believe in magic, then there's magic! 1940 01:26:18,016 --> 01:26:19,951 It's raining so hard! 1941 01:26:19,951 --> 01:26:22,487 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1942 01:26:22,754 --> 01:26:24,789 "To truly experience ecstatic sex, 1943 01:26:24,789 --> 01:26:26,825 you must first fall in love with yourself. 1944 01:26:26,825 --> 01:26:30,829 Look at yourself in a mirror and say, 'I love you.'" 1945 01:26:36,768 --> 01:26:38,303 I love you. 1946 01:26:40,772 --> 01:26:42,374 I love you. 1947 01:26:44,042 --> 01:26:45,443 Well... 1948 01:26:46,778 --> 01:26:48,613 "Now look at your yoni in a mirror 1949 01:26:48,613 --> 01:26:51,483 and admire its tremendous beauty." 1950 01:26:57,555 --> 01:26:59,190 I love you. 1951 01:26:59,591 --> 01:27:03,561 "Discover what kind of pressure you like. Play music." 1952 01:27:11,336 --> 01:27:13,671 ♪ I pull up to the club ♪ 1953 01:27:13,671 --> 01:27:15,573 ♪ I got my swag on ♪ 1954 01:27:15,573 --> 01:27:17,442 ♪ The music's playing loud ♪ 1955 01:27:17,442 --> 01:27:19,577 ♪ Can't play their money y'all ♪ 1956 01:27:19,577 --> 01:27:21,880 ♪ I see 'em lookin' at me ♪ 1957 01:27:21,880 --> 01:27:23,848 ♪ She got a pretty smile ♪ 1958 01:27:23,848 --> 01:27:26,484 ♪ So I'm-a get a drink ♪ 1959 01:27:33,558 --> 01:27:34,859 Mm. Okay. 1960 01:27:38,863 --> 01:27:40,698 ♪ Come on ♪ 1961 01:27:43,768 --> 01:27:46,504 Hell! Hell! Hell! 1962 01:27:46,504 --> 01:27:49,107 And hell! 1963 01:27:49,107 --> 01:27:49,774 Shut up. 1964 01:27:49,774 --> 01:27:50,975 ♪ Girl I want ya ♪ 1965 01:27:50,975 --> 01:27:53,378 ♪ There's no way... ♪ 1966 01:27:56,081 --> 01:27:59,884 - Can you take your shirt off? - Don't. Please. Please don't. 1967 01:27:59,884 --> 01:28:01,786 Can I just leave it on? 1968 01:28:01,853 --> 01:28:03,655 Can I-- Okay. 1969 01:28:05,457 --> 01:28:06,958 Um... 1970 01:28:09,861 --> 01:28:10,528 I just... 1971 01:28:10,528 --> 01:28:13,598 I don't want you to be disappointed. 1972 01:28:15,200 --> 01:28:18,169 Why don't you let me be the judge of that? 1973 01:28:42,660 --> 01:28:46,631 You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. 1974 01:28:57,342 --> 01:28:59,811 See ya, Jane. 1975 01:29:01,346 --> 01:29:02,113 - Hi. - Hi. 1976 01:29:02,113 --> 01:29:03,848 Can I talk to you for a second? 1977 01:29:03,848 --> 01:29:04,682 - Okay. - Um, 1978 01:29:04,682 --> 01:29:06,284 I'm the old assistant who likes sluts. 1979 01:29:06,284 --> 01:29:08,153 I know who you are. I liked your script. 1980 01:29:08,153 --> 01:29:11,789 Thank you. So I'm not working for Peter anymore. 1981 01:29:11,789 --> 01:29:12,657 Good. He's a dick. 1982 01:29:12,657 --> 01:29:15,693 Yeah. And I wrote a new script and I wanted to pitch it to you 1983 01:29:15,693 --> 01:29:17,495 and I was hoping you would read it. 1984 01:29:17,495 --> 01:29:18,530 How did you find me? 1985 01:29:18,530 --> 01:29:21,232 Well, I, uh... I stole Peter's contacts. 1986 01:29:21,232 --> 01:29:24,235 - Oh, very sneaky. I like that. - I'm sneaky. 1987 01:29:24,235 --> 01:29:26,037 - Mm-hmm. - I want to be a filmmaker. 1988 01:29:26,037 --> 01:29:27,705 Really? Have you directed before? 1989 01:29:27,705 --> 01:29:30,241 - No, just a short. - Hmm. Well, okay. 1990 01:29:30,241 --> 01:29:33,278 You can walk me to my car. I'll give you five minutes. 1991 01:29:33,278 --> 01:29:34,746 Okay! 1992 01:29:39,517 --> 01:29:41,352 Are you dating Steve? 1993 01:29:42,053 --> 01:29:44,022 What? No. 1994 01:29:47,926 --> 01:29:50,628 - Let's be monogamous. - Oh! 1995 01:29:50,628 --> 01:29:51,996 Let's be monogamous right now! 1996 01:29:51,996 --> 01:29:53,765 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1997 01:29:54,666 --> 01:29:56,701 - Oh! - Ow. 1998 01:29:58,336 --> 01:29:58,903 Mm-hmm! 1999 01:29:58,903 --> 01:30:00,939 I am going to get the biggest Cosmo they got. 2000 01:30:00,939 --> 01:30:02,907 - Make it a double. - Oh, I just love your boots. 2001 01:30:02,907 --> 01:30:05,610 - They're gorgeous. - Right? I know. Right? 2002 01:30:05,877 --> 01:30:08,012 - Excuse me. - Yes? 2003 01:30:08,012 --> 01:30:11,349 Are you the priest from St. Francis of Assisi? 2004 01:30:11,416 --> 01:30:13,351 Yes, I used to be. 2005 01:30:13,351 --> 01:30:16,454 I used to go to your church when I was a kid. 2006 01:30:16,921 --> 01:30:18,356 Oh! 2007 01:30:18,356 --> 01:30:20,258 - Well. - Yeah. 2008 01:30:20,258 --> 01:30:21,726 Hmm. 2009 01:30:22,460 --> 01:30:24,529 Didn't you used to preach that no one should have sex 2010 01:30:24,529 --> 01:30:26,664 unless it was for the purpose of procreation? 2011 01:30:26,664 --> 01:30:28,433 Oh, I used to say a lot of stuff. 2012 01:30:28,433 --> 01:30:30,335 - Mm-hmm. - Now I just do what feels good. 2013 01:30:30,335 --> 01:30:33,371 - And what feels good is Frank. - Mm-hmm! 2014 01:30:33,371 --> 01:30:35,640 Excuse me. But-- but what about people 2015 01:30:35,640 --> 01:30:36,641 who listened to what you said 2016 01:30:36,641 --> 01:30:38,876 and then they spent their lives feeling tormented? 2017 01:30:38,876 --> 01:30:40,578 And what about hell? 2018 01:30:41,546 --> 01:30:43,047 Sorry? 2019 01:30:47,418 --> 01:30:48,820 Don't torment yourself. 2020 01:30:48,820 --> 01:30:51,789 I think God wants us to be happy. 2021 01:30:55,126 --> 01:30:58,463 - So uncomfortable. - Right? I know. 2022 01:31:00,398 --> 01:31:03,368 I know you're gonna talk at TED one day. 2023 01:31:03,368 --> 01:31:05,236 You are so great. 2024 01:31:05,236 --> 01:31:06,571 I love you. 2025 01:31:06,571 --> 01:31:09,407 I love you. Thank you. 2026 01:31:11,709 --> 01:31:14,312 You know, Honey got me that unicorn. 2027 01:31:14,312 --> 01:31:16,080 It's so cute! 2028 01:31:16,381 --> 01:31:18,249 Unicorns are lame. 2029 01:31:21,419 --> 01:31:23,321 You don't like unicorns? 2030 01:31:24,289 --> 01:31:26,124 - Eh. - What? 2031 01:31:26,124 --> 01:31:28,293 I-- I just... 2032 01:31:28,293 --> 01:31:30,495 I'm not crazy about 'em. 2033 01:31:30,561 --> 01:31:33,498 How can you not like unicorns? 2034 01:31:33,931 --> 01:31:35,933 I-- I think they're creepy. 2035 01:31:35,933 --> 01:31:37,168 - Creepy? - Yes, 2036 01:31:37,168 --> 01:31:39,904 especially when they're looking over the bed. 2037 01:31:39,904 --> 01:31:42,006 Look, a human interacting with a computer 2038 01:31:42,006 --> 01:31:44,709 is interesting, you know? But when a human interacts 2039 01:31:44,709 --> 01:31:46,511 with a unicorn... 2040 01:31:47,345 --> 01:31:50,915 - not as much, okay? - Unicorns are interesting. 2041 01:31:50,915 --> 01:31:53,017 I just... I think you're a beautiful, 2042 01:31:53,017 --> 01:31:53,951 lovely, attractive woman. 2043 01:31:53,951 --> 01:31:56,854 I think you should just limit how much you talk about unicorns 2044 01:31:56,854 --> 01:31:58,022 in front of people, okay? 2045 01:31:58,022 --> 01:31:59,590 I just don't want you to be uncomfortable 2046 01:31:59,590 --> 01:32:00,858 when you meet the TED people. 2047 01:32:00,858 --> 01:32:03,795 So maybe not, you know, don't talk about them too much 2048 01:32:03,795 --> 01:32:05,530 in front of everyone. 2049 01:32:10,301 --> 01:32:11,569 Huh. 2050 01:32:12,503 --> 01:32:15,373 I want to be monogamous, but not with you. 2051 01:32:16,507 --> 01:32:19,410 - What? - I want to date other people. 2052 01:32:20,278 --> 01:32:21,846 Are-- are you kidding? 2053 01:32:22,613 --> 01:32:24,248 I'm a unicorn. 2054 01:32:24,716 --> 01:32:26,250 What? I... 2055 01:32:26,517 --> 01:32:27,452 What are you saying? 2056 01:32:27,452 --> 01:32:31,255 You don't like unicorns, and that's a deal breaker. 2057 01:32:33,191 --> 01:32:34,959 Let's be friends. 2058 01:32:50,641 --> 01:32:53,010 ♪ Ooh ♪ 2059 01:32:56,347 --> 01:32:59,016 ♪ That feels ♪ 2060 01:33:00,151 --> 01:33:02,353 ♪ Inside ♪ 2061 01:33:04,489 --> 01:33:07,925 ♪ All I ever want ♪ 2062 01:33:08,226 --> 01:33:11,729 ♪ All I could ever need ♪ 2063 01:33:11,729 --> 01:33:16,667 ♪ You and I ♪ 2064 01:33:19,103 --> 01:33:23,875 ♪ You and I ♪ 2065 01:33:24,442 --> 01:33:26,144 You are loved. 2066 01:33:26,144 --> 01:33:30,081 This feeling is always inside of you. 2067 01:33:30,081 --> 01:33:33,518 ♪ And all I could ever see ♪ 2068 01:33:33,518 --> 01:33:36,721 ♪ All I could ever want ♪ 2069 01:33:36,721 --> 01:33:41,259 ♪ All I could ever need Is you ♪ 2070 01:33:55,072 --> 01:33:57,842 Hey. 2071 01:33:57,909 --> 01:33:58,776 What are you doing here? 2072 01:33:58,776 --> 01:34:01,846 Um, I wrote the script about the witches. 2073 01:34:01,846 --> 01:34:03,714 Honey, that's incredible. 2074 01:34:03,714 --> 01:34:06,717 Wow, that's great. 2075 01:34:06,717 --> 01:34:09,120 How-- how did you know where I live? 2076 01:34:09,120 --> 01:34:11,656 I stole Peter's contacts, yo. 2077 01:34:11,656 --> 01:34:13,925 You know, you're really nice to me. 2078 01:34:14,592 --> 01:34:16,427 And nice is sexy. 2079 01:34:16,694 --> 01:34:17,495 Nice is sexy, yo. 2080 01:34:17,495 --> 01:34:19,597 ♪ I learned this 'cause I've been nicer to myself ♪ 2081 01:34:19,597 --> 01:34:22,700 ♪ And now I see it See I'm like a little tree ♪ 2082 01:34:22,700 --> 01:34:24,001 ♪ I need to nurture myself ♪ 2083 01:34:24,001 --> 01:34:26,103 ♪ With some happy Little thoughts ♪ 2084 01:34:26,103 --> 01:34:27,805 ♪ And that's what I did yo ♪ 2085 01:34:27,805 --> 01:34:29,440 Da-da-dum, blossom. 2086 01:34:30,374 --> 01:34:32,376 Do you want to go on a date? 2087 01:34:33,077 --> 01:34:36,013 More than ever. 2088 01:34:37,348 --> 01:34:38,850 Ta-dah! 2089 01:34:38,850 --> 01:34:41,285 - Aw! - We're so proud of you. 2090 01:34:41,285 --> 01:34:42,220 Yeah! 2091 01:34:42,220 --> 01:34:43,721 You're the orgasming champion! 2092 01:34:43,721 --> 01:34:45,957 - Oh, thank you. - And the masturbating champion! 2093 01:34:45,957 --> 01:34:48,292 I'm not sure who I was competing against, 2094 01:34:48,292 --> 01:34:49,827 but I'm glad I won! 2095 01:34:49,827 --> 01:34:51,996 I want to light a candle for our friendship, 2096 01:34:51,996 --> 01:34:54,432 'cause I'm really grateful for you guys. 2097 01:35:03,441 --> 01:35:06,611 I heard this music and it made me think of you. 2098 01:35:14,085 --> 01:35:18,456 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2099 01:35:18,456 --> 01:35:20,791 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2100 01:35:20,791 --> 01:35:24,996 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2101 01:35:24,996 --> 01:35:27,231 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2102 01:35:27,231 --> 01:35:31,669 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2103 01:35:31,669 --> 01:35:34,071 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2104 01:35:34,071 --> 01:35:38,276 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2105 01:35:38,276 --> 01:35:40,811 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2106 01:35:40,811 --> 01:35:43,915 ♪ A kiss good night A kiss by darkness ♪ 2107 01:35:43,915 --> 01:35:46,851 ♪ A kiss to all the end Of rain ♪ 2108 01:35:46,851 --> 01:35:50,187 ♪ To stall this night To stall this darkness ♪ 2109 01:35:50,187 --> 01:35:53,624 ♪ To stall this night To the end of days ♪ 2110 01:35:53,624 --> 01:35:57,795 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2111 01:35:57,795 --> 01:36:00,264 Cut! 2112 01:36:00,531 --> 01:36:04,101 ♪ Don't you wanna know That magic is real ♪ 2113 01:36:04,101 --> 01:36:07,905 ♪ Don't you wanna have Something to feel ♪ 2114 01:36:07,905 --> 01:36:08,773 ♪ One life ♪ 2115 01:36:08,773 --> 01:36:12,977 ♪ And the world Will open doorways ♪ 2116 01:36:12,977 --> 01:36:15,413 I love my pussy! 2117 01:36:15,413 --> 01:36:19,784 - Yes to orgasms! - Yes to orgasms! 2118 01:36:19,984 --> 01:36:22,820 Yes 2119 01:36:22,820 --> 01:36:25,523 to orgasms! 2120 01:36:25,523 --> 01:36:28,826 Yes to orgasms! 2121 01:36:28,826 --> 01:36:32,530 Masters and Johnson taught us that an orgasm was just, 2122 01:36:32,530 --> 01:36:35,433 you know, like, up, down, like, quick. 2123 01:36:35,433 --> 01:36:38,369 It isn't. You can train yourself 2124 01:36:38,369 --> 01:36:39,904 to have an extended, 2125 01:36:39,904 --> 01:36:44,442 massive orgasm. Isn't that amazing? 2126 01:36:44,942 --> 01:36:46,377 Who here would like to learn 2127 01:36:46,377 --> 01:36:50,114 how to have an extended, massive orgasm? 2128 01:36:52,116 --> 01:36:54,485 Who here would like to learn how to have 2129 01:36:54,485 --> 01:36:56,721 an earth-shattering orgasm? 2130 01:37:00,057 --> 01:37:05,396 ♪ And I will believe in us ♪ 2131 01:37:09,066 --> 01:37:10,768 I tell my pussy that I love her. 2132 01:37:10,768 --> 01:37:14,005 I love you, pussy. I love you. I love you so much. 2133 01:37:14,005 --> 01:37:18,576 You're a sweet, sweet, sweet little puss. 2134 01:37:20,344 --> 01:37:25,016 ♪ I will believe in you ♪ 2135 01:37:26,517 --> 01:37:31,789 ♪ And I will believe in us ♪ 2136 01:37:32,790 --> 01:37:38,329 ♪ And I will believe That all of this is true ♪ 2137 01:37:39,597 --> 01:37:46,003 ♪ And I will believe in us Tonight ♪ 2138 01:37:46,003 --> 01:37:46,871 ♪ Tonight ♪ 2139 01:37:46,871 --> 01:37:50,508 ♪ Just for once don't you wanna Know magic is real ♪ 2140 01:37:50,508 --> 01:37:52,977 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2141 01:37:52,977 --> 01:37:57,214 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2142 01:37:57,214 --> 01:37:59,650 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2143 01:37:59,650 --> 01:38:03,921 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2144 01:38:03,921 --> 01:38:06,257 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2145 01:38:06,257 --> 01:38:10,361 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2146 01:38:10,361 --> 01:38:12,863 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2147 01:38:12,863 --> 01:38:16,333 ♪ A kiss goodnight A kiss by darkness ♪ 2148 01:38:16,333 --> 01:38:19,303 ♪ A kiss to all the end Of rain ♪ 2149 01:38:19,303 --> 01:38:22,740 ♪ To stall this night To stall this darkness ♪ 2150 01:38:22,740 --> 01:38:26,110 ♪ To stall this night Till the end of days ♪ 2151 01:38:26,110 --> 01:38:31,348 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2152 01:38:46,764 --> 01:38:47,965 ♪ Just for once ♪ 2153 01:38:47,965 --> 01:38:52,770 ♪ Just for once Don't you wanna know ♪ 2154 01:38:53,504 --> 01:38:54,538 ♪ Just for once ♪ 2155 01:38:54,538 --> 01:38:59,076 ♪ Just for once Don't you wanna know ♪ 2156 01:38:59,276 --> 01:39:03,547 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2157 01:39:03,547 --> 01:39:05,916 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2158 01:39:05,916 --> 01:39:10,087 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2159 01:39:10,087 --> 01:39:12,523 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2160 01:39:12,523 --> 01:39:16,627 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2161 01:39:16,627 --> 01:39:19,130 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2162 01:39:19,130 --> 01:39:23,200 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2163 01:39:23,200 --> 01:39:25,803 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2164 01:39:25,803 --> 01:39:29,807 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2165 01:39:29,807 --> 01:39:32,443 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2166 01:39:32,443 --> 01:39:36,647 ♪ Just for once don't you Wanna know that magic is real ♪ 2167 01:39:36,647 --> 01:39:40,885 ♪ Is real is real is real ♪ 2168 01:39:45,523 --> 01:39:49,727 Presenting 2169 01:39:49,727 --> 01:39:50,861 pussy! 146635