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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,535 --> 00:00:03,136 [upbeat music] 2 00:00:03,169 --> 00:00:04,671 I'm Robert James, Mr. LA 3 00:00:04,705 --> 00:00:07,273 sayin' peace to you. 4 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:10,611 ‐ My man, good show. ‐ Alright. 5 00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:13,346 Hey, Robert, I have someone who would like to meet you. 6 00:00:13,379 --> 00:00:14,748 Hey, Robert, I'm Brian Goodman. 7 00:00:14,781 --> 00:00:17,518 I'm an executive producer at Entertainment Tonight 8 00:00:17,551 --> 00:00:20,086 and I've been checking you out for a long time. 9 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:21,588 [chuckles] Oh, thank you. 10 00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,156 You are talkin' about my work, right? 11 00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:24,525 No, I'm talkin' about your ass. 12 00:00:24,558 --> 00:00:26,092 I'm kidding, I'm straight! 13 00:00:26,126 --> 00:00:27,528 [laughing] 14 00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,463 But I'm sure it's delightful. No! 15 00:00:30,496 --> 00:00:32,599 I'm, uh, I'm here because we fired 16 00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:34,367 our weekend entertainment guy 17 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:36,102 and we would like you to replace him. 18 00:00:36,136 --> 00:00:37,270 ‐ Word? ‐ Word? 19 00:00:37,303 --> 00:00:38,839 ‐ Word? ‐ Word. 20 00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:40,807 You got the talent, you've got the energy 21 00:00:40,841 --> 00:00:43,577 you would be the perfect addition to our show. 22 00:00:43,610 --> 00:00:45,111 Do you know what? I'm flattered. 23 00:00:45,145 --> 00:00:46,312 But Mr. LA is my thing right now 24 00:00:46,346 --> 00:00:47,581 and it keeps me pretty busy. 25 00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:48,749 Well, it's just weekends 26 00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:50,717 couple hours tops, and we're.. 27 00:00:50,751 --> 00:00:54,420 [chuckles] We're prepared to do whatever it takes to make this happen. 28 00:00:54,454 --> 00:00:56,122 Really? 29 00:00:56,156 --> 00:00:59,159 Well, does whatever include bringin' my producer? 30 00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:00,393 If that's what it takes. 31 00:01:01,461 --> 00:01:02,796 See if they have benefits. 32 00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:04,531 I had the Mr. LA dental max. 33 00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:07,768 Dirk Black. It'll be a pleasure workin' with you. 34 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:10,704 For me. So, do we have a deal? 35 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:13,607 ‐ I'm in. ‐ Fantastic! Welcome aboard. 36 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,509 I'll have my lawyer send the paperwork over. 37 00:01:15,542 --> 00:01:17,143 Okay. Alright. 38 00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:21,347 My man! Thanks for havin' my back, man. 39 00:01:21,381 --> 00:01:23,416 Come on, man, you know how we do, we a team, Dirk. 40 00:01:23,449 --> 00:01:25,552 ‐ That's right, that's right. ‐ And guess what? 41 00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:28,388 Your boy is about to be on a national show! 42 00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:30,591 I'm about to produce a national show. 43 00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:32,559 I'm gonna watch a national show. 44 00:01:34,628 --> 00:01:36,262 "CSI" is on tonight. 45 00:01:39,465 --> 00:01:41,635 ♪ Often I wish that we ♪ 46 00:01:41,668 --> 00:01:44,270 ♪ Could take the time to see ♪ 47 00:01:44,304 --> 00:01:46,372 ♪ The need there is to be ♪ 48 00:01:46,406 --> 00:01:48,875 ♪ A family yeah ♪ 49 00:01:48,909 --> 00:01:51,244 ♪ 'Cause it's All Of Us ♪ 50 00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:53,680 ♪ Sometimes it can be rough ♪ 51 00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:55,448 ♪ Time and seasons change ♪ 52 00:01:55,481 --> 00:01:58,251 ♪ But we will still remain ♪ 53 00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,621 ♪ It's just All Of Us ♪ 54 00:02:00,654 --> 00:02:03,156 ♪ It's just All Of Us ♪ 55 00:02:03,189 --> 00:02:05,726 ♪ It's just All Of Us ♪ 56 00:02:05,759 --> 00:02:08,895 ♪ It's just All Of Us ♪♪♪ 57 00:02:13,834 --> 00:02:15,702 [instrumental music] 58 00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:17,437 I know you guys have produced a tremendous amount 59 00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:18,705 of local television, but let me tell you 60 00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,841 how it works on the national front. 61 00:02:20,874 --> 00:02:22,709 Come on, I can do this in my sleep. 62 00:02:22,743 --> 00:02:25,679 [chuckles] Well, that sounds like a neat trick, Dirk. 63 00:02:25,712 --> 00:02:29,516 But, uh, humor me, and try it while you're awake. 64 00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:30,717 [cellphone beeping] 65 00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:32,619 Uh, I'm sorry. They need me in editing. 66 00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:34,220 I will be right back. 67 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:38,324 Man, Entertainment Tonight is about to meet 68 00:02:38,358 --> 00:02:40,426 the Dirk Black vision. 69 00:02:40,460 --> 00:02:43,196 Or as I like to call it, the Black Hotness. 70 00:02:44,598 --> 00:02:45,966 Okay, Dirk.. 71 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,433 ...before you give him your vision 72 00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:49,435 why don't you give him their vision? 73 00:02:49,469 --> 00:02:51,337 Fine. But I know what they want. 74 00:02:51,371 --> 00:02:52,639 They're just too afraid to ask for it. 75 00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,407 Their lips say Mary Hart 76 00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:57,277 but their eyes are beggin' for the Black Hotness. 77 00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:59,245 [instrumental music] 78 00:03:01,347 --> 00:03:03,884 ‐ Hey, Rusty, come on in. ‐ What's goin' on, Neesee? 79 00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:05,752 ‐ Well, I should ask you that. ‐ Ugh. 80 00:03:05,786 --> 00:03:08,421 You gonna build Neesee's bookshelves or Noah's Ark? 81 00:03:08,454 --> 00:03:10,657 [chuckling] 82 00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:12,559 Alright, um, well 83 00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:14,595 the shelves are gonna go there. 84 00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:16,630 Gotcha. 85 00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:18,732 So, how's Sarah? 86 00:03:18,765 --> 00:03:21,467 Oh, you know, bossy, nosy, high‐maintenance 87 00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:22,969 typical big sister stuff. 88 00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,304 [Rusty laughs] 89 00:03:24,337 --> 00:03:25,606 Listen, I'm gonna get started 90 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:26,940 so I'll be out of your way, alright? 91 00:03:26,973 --> 00:03:28,775 Well, no, no, no. I'm gonna be right here. 92 00:03:28,809 --> 00:03:30,443 See, I made myself your assistant 93 00:03:30,476 --> 00:03:32,312 so next time, I won't have to call you. 94 00:03:32,345 --> 00:03:35,415 Well, that's too bad. What if I wanted you to call me, huh? 95 00:03:35,448 --> 00:03:36,550 [Rusty chuckles] 96 00:03:36,583 --> 00:03:38,685 Oh, I see, you into the oldies, huh? 97 00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:40,253 ‐ Mm‐hmm. ‐ What you got here? 98 00:03:40,286 --> 00:03:42,355 Cameo and Slave. 99 00:03:42,388 --> 00:03:44,457 Switch. The O'Jays. 100 00:03:44,490 --> 00:03:45,759 Harold Melvin And The Blue Notes. 101 00:03:47,594 --> 00:03:49,896 Rufus and Chaka Khan, girl? 102 00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:51,464 You don't know nothin' about that. 103 00:03:51,497 --> 00:03:52,733 Girl, please, I'm surprised I don't see no 104 00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:54,367 Donny Hathaway, Atlantic Starr 105 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,036 some Earth, Wind & Fire up in here. 106 00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,771 Oh, well, no, you better put them goggles on 107 00:03:57,804 --> 00:04:00,406 and keep lookin', 'cause they all over there. 108 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:01,975 You know, I got Earth, Wind & Fire 109 00:04:02,008 --> 00:04:03,443 in the player, right now. 110 00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:06,513 ‐ Stop. ‐ Hmm. Well, sing it, boys. 111 00:04:06,547 --> 00:04:07,681 Aah! 112 00:04:07,714 --> 00:04:10,350 ♪ The reasons that we hear ♪ 113 00:04:10,383 --> 00:04:11,518 Where? 114 00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:12,686 ♪ The reasons that.. ♪ 115 00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:13,754 Gimme that. 116 00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:15,488 ♪ Our feelings a won't ♪ 117 00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:16,590 ‐ Break it down, baby. ‐ Okay. 118 00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:17,758 ♪ Disappear ♪ 119 00:04:17,791 --> 00:04:18,992 Here's the part, here's the part. 120 00:04:19,025 --> 00:04:20,761 ♪ Ooh ♪ 121 00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:22,028 ♪ And ♪ 122 00:04:22,062 --> 00:04:24,064 ♪ After the love game ♪ 123 00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:25,632 ♪ Has been played ♪ 124 00:04:25,666 --> 00:04:27,568 ♪ And all our illusions ♪ 125 00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,402 ♪ Were just a parade ♪ 126 00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:30,604 ♪ And all the reasons.. ♪♪♪ 127 00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:33,006 Ah‐ah, I know the words, huh? 128 00:04:33,039 --> 00:04:35,308 You know somethin', girl, this thing had me 129 00:04:35,341 --> 00:04:36,910 lock myself up in my room 130 00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:39,846 and teach myself how to play the bass when I was 15, I swear. 131 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,582 Oh, okay, okay. 132 00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:43,449 Uh, a musician and a carpenter. 133 00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:45,385 ‐ Uh‐huh. ‐ A man of many talents. 134 00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:48,021 [chuckles] Well, two, anyway. 135 00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:49,355 [laughing] 136 00:04:49,389 --> 00:04:50,624 You know, I have a band. 137 00:04:50,657 --> 00:04:52,593 You should come see me play sometime. 138 00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:54,995 Oh, well, you should invite me to see you play sometime. 139 00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:56,530 Well, consider yourself invited. 140 00:04:56,563 --> 00:04:58,064 Well, consider yourself late. 141 00:04:58,098 --> 00:05:00,100 [both laughing] 142 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:02,503 Well, assistant, why don't you hand me a piece of that wood 143 00:05:02,536 --> 00:05:04,404 before the boss lady gets back. 144 00:05:04,437 --> 00:05:06,339 Yeah, 'cause I heard she real mean. 145 00:05:06,372 --> 00:05:07,874 No. 146 00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:10,010 She only seems that way until you get to know her. 147 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,378 [chuckles] 148 00:05:17,450 --> 00:05:19,119 Oh! I got a splint. 149 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,521 Nah‐uh, don't worry about it. 150 00:05:20,554 --> 00:05:21,722 I get these all the time. 151 00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:25,526 It is an occupational...hazard. 152 00:05:25,559 --> 00:05:28,629 I think I should get worker's comp for this. 153 00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:29,863 Why don't we settle out of court and you let me 154 00:05:29,896 --> 00:05:31,097 take you to dinner? 155 00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:32,866 Tsk, uh.. 156 00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:34,901 ...I don't settle. 157 00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:36,537 But I'll go to dinner with you. 158 00:05:36,570 --> 00:05:37,804 ‐ Ha‐ha‐ha. ‐ Oh. 159 00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:38,839 [driller whirring] 160 00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:39,873 ‐ Oh! ‐ Oh. 161 00:05:40,907 --> 00:05:43,376 That's, that's my drill, but.. 162 00:05:43,409 --> 00:05:45,445 ...it's, it's turned off now. 163 00:05:45,478 --> 00:05:46,747 The drill, I mean.. 164 00:05:48,048 --> 00:05:49,516 ...turned off. 165 00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:55,455 [instrumental music] 166 00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,925 Mm, mm‐hm. See, honey. Come here. 167 00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:00,727 See, this is the story for you to cover 168 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,495 on Entertainment Tonight, okay? 169 00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,565 This teacher in Missouri just sold a children's book 170 00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:07,834 about talkin' tricycles for $600,000. 171 00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:09,770 ‐ Six hundred thousand dollars? ‐ 'Yeah.' 172 00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:11,838 ‐ Say word. ‐ Word. 173 00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:13,740 Now, you know what we could do with that kind of money? 174 00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,676 ‐ Mm. ‐ We could get a summer home. 175 00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:17,811 We wouldn't have to worry about Bobby's college and‐‐ 176 00:06:17,844 --> 00:06:20,080 Look, baby, the self‐publishing industry 177 00:06:20,113 --> 00:06:21,682 has changed a lot since you were in the game. 178 00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:23,183 Yeah, it doesn't matter, 'cause, see 179 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:25,085 I'mma just get back to writing my books. 180 00:06:25,118 --> 00:06:26,520 Okay, let's see, uh 181 00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,822 furniture, mm‐hm, furniture. 182 00:06:28,855 --> 00:06:32,659 A story about a little lost loveseat 183 00:06:32,693 --> 00:06:36,496 lookin' for his dead...ottoman! 184 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:38,932 Ah! Yeah, that's good, that's good. 185 00:06:38,965 --> 00:06:41,902 Baby, how is a loveseat gonna have a daddy? 186 00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,570 Baby, you have seen children's TV. 187 00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:45,972 Anything is possible with a little imagination. 188 00:06:46,006 --> 00:06:47,207 Talkin' trees, talkin' peanuts.. 189 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,742 Oh‐oh‐oh. 190 00:06:48,775 --> 00:06:52,646 A talkin' tree named Peanut. Yeah. 191 00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:54,948 You know what, baby, I'm gonna go get a glove 192 00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:57,150 so I can catch all these gems, okay? 193 00:06:57,183 --> 00:06:58,719 Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. 194 00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:00,954 You go away, you let me create. 195 00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:03,624 Well, hey, baby, I was meanin' to ask you. 196 00:07:03,657 --> 00:07:04,991 How was school today? 197 00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:08,161 ‐ Good. Have you seen my hat? ‐ Uh, no. 198 00:07:08,194 --> 00:07:09,630 But we can look for that after we talk. 199 00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:11,031 Come on, sit down, sit down. 200 00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,533 Okay. 201 00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:13,900 So.. 202 00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:15,068 ...kids talkin' about any good books 203 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,838 down at the yard lately, hm? 204 00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:22,743 I don't know, I spent recess lookin' for my hat. 205 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:25,145 Well, um, we'll find it, just come over here and talk. 206 00:07:25,178 --> 00:07:26,847 Maybe it's in my room. 207 00:07:28,515 --> 00:07:30,483 Okay, well, I hope you find it. 208 00:07:30,517 --> 00:07:32,185 [gasps] Ooh. 209 00:07:32,218 --> 00:07:35,188 A little boy who lost his hat. 210 00:07:35,221 --> 00:07:38,692 Yes! I'll tell the cat it's tit‐for‐tat. 211 00:07:38,725 --> 00:07:41,461 Whoo! G‐O‐L‐D gold, baby! Yeah! 212 00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:44,831 [instrumental music] 213 00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:48,535 Alright, Kweli, I'm gonna ask you a question 214 00:07:48,569 --> 00:07:49,903 that's on everybody's minds. 215 00:07:49,936 --> 00:07:51,237 ‐ Shoot. ‐ Alright. 216 00:07:51,271 --> 00:07:53,540 Do conscious rappers get groupies? 217 00:07:53,574 --> 00:07:54,908 [chuckles] Wow, um.. 218 00:07:54,941 --> 00:07:56,677 I don't really call 'em groupies. 219 00:07:56,710 --> 00:07:59,245 I prefer to call 'em supporters of my output, you understand? 220 00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:01,147 Oh, I get that. I feel you, I feel you. 221 00:08:01,181 --> 00:08:03,249 Well, I wanna thank you for letting E. T. behind the scenes 222 00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:04,851 of your new video, "Never Been In Love." 223 00:08:04,885 --> 00:08:06,553 ‐ Thank you, Robert. ‐ Alright. 224 00:08:06,587 --> 00:08:08,889 I'm Robert James for Entertainment Tonight, and.. 225 00:08:08,922 --> 00:08:10,824 Yo, would you like to take us out with a freestyle? 226 00:08:10,857 --> 00:08:12,225 I love to, it's what I do. 227 00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:14,027 Now, get the mike, word up. 228 00:08:14,060 --> 00:08:15,128 Alright, here we go. 229 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:16,963 ♪ Yo it's Kweli ♪ 230 00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,132 ♪ You could pronounce the name I'm rockin' with ET ♪ 231 00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:20,967 ♪ And my people's Robert James here ♪ 232 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,703 ♪ Shut out Mos Def shut out Hi‐Tech ♪ 233 00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:24,104 ♪ Shut out Black Thought ♪ 234 00:08:24,137 --> 00:08:25,806 ♪ Give it here cut the check word ♪ 235 00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:27,841 ♪ Yo my freestyle skills' evident ♪ 236 00:08:27,874 --> 00:08:30,210 ♪ Forget George Bush they want Kweli for president ♪ 237 00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:31,712 ♪ Peace and love Brooklyn ♪♪♪ 238 00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:33,146 ‐ Mm. Alright. ‐ Alright. 239 00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:35,916 I'm Robert James for Entertainment Tonight. 240 00:08:35,949 --> 00:08:38,952 I did my part. I'mma send it back to my girl, Mary Hart. 241 00:08:38,985 --> 00:08:40,854 Good job, Robert. 242 00:08:40,887 --> 00:08:42,222 Wait till you see the finished cut. 243 00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:43,757 We're gonna have Kweli freestylin' 244 00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:45,225 with some neighborhood kids behind him. 245 00:08:45,258 --> 00:08:46,960 Then we're gonna bring in a graffiti artist to put up‐‐ 246 00:08:46,993 --> 00:08:48,328 Yeah, we don't need it. 247 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:49,963 For your first effort, this is good. 248 00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:51,865 ‐ Thanks, Brian. ‐ "Good?" 249 00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:54,067 I'm sorry, I didn't realize we were settling for "good." 250 00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:57,037 I'm sorry. What's the problem, Dirk? 251 00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,039 My problem is, the piece is good. 252 00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,340 But we can make it better. 253 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,676 But I said I'm happy with it. 254 00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:05,579 Dirk, you heard what he said. He's happy with it, man. 255 00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:07,313 Hey, my name's on it, man. 256 00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:09,616 I don't want my name on anything that's not hot. 257 00:09:09,650 --> 00:09:11,184 You want your name on somethin' that's not hot? 258 00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:13,787 Actually, I want my name on something that's successful 259 00:09:13,820 --> 00:09:16,890 like this show. 260 00:09:16,923 --> 00:09:19,025 It's true, Entertainment Tonight is a success 261 00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,094 but the only way to continue being a success 262 00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:23,897 is by evolving, staying on the cutting edge. 263 00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:25,966 And I can make that happen. 264 00:09:25,999 --> 00:09:28,268 ‐ You know why? ‐ Because you're hot? 265 00:09:29,836 --> 00:09:31,204 Bingo! 266 00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:34,240 Hotness, baby. H‐O‐T‐ness. 267 00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:38,144 I'm the Hotness Monster. 268 00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:41,181 ‐ I think I know what I'm doing. ‐ Fine. 269 00:09:41,214 --> 00:09:44,117 If bland is what you want, that's what you'll get. 270 00:09:44,150 --> 00:09:46,620 Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll go unblacken my catfish. 271 00:09:49,823 --> 00:09:51,758 What does that even mean? 272 00:09:51,792 --> 00:09:53,059 Well, he, he thinks.. 273 00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:55,996 He cooks.. 274 00:09:56,029 --> 00:09:58,064 ...and his mother's Creole. 275 00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:00,901 We're good, we‐we're good, right‐‐ 276 00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:02,402 Now, we're far from good, Robert. 277 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:04,805 In fact, if Los Angeles were good 278 00:10:04,838 --> 00:10:06,239 we'd be in Okinawa. 279 00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:10,644 I'm sorry, I just had to turn around to see if 280 00:10:10,677 --> 00:10:12,679 Dirk had B‐roll of Japanese people 281 00:10:12,713 --> 00:10:14,981 krumpin' behind me. 282 00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:16,983 Look, I know Dirk could be a hothead sometime‐‐ 283 00:10:17,017 --> 00:10:19,786 Well, he is the Hotness Monster. 284 00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:22,122 Well, well, Brian, that's because he has vision 285 00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:23,724 and he's a perfectionist, he can produce 286 00:10:23,757 --> 00:10:25,726 anything that you want. 287 00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:27,393 I doubt it. He may have to go. 288 00:10:27,427 --> 00:10:29,062 Brian, you can't fire Dirk. We're a team. 289 00:10:29,095 --> 00:10:30,664 If you fire him, you're gonna have to fire me. 290 00:10:32,265 --> 00:10:33,967 Look, man, we‐we're just used to doin' things 291 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,301 a different way, alright? 292 00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:36,870 We're here. 293 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:41,908 You're here. 294 00:10:49,015 --> 00:10:51,084 But trust me, if you give him some time 295 00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:53,386 he'll adjust. 296 00:10:53,419 --> 00:10:55,421 Alright. For you, I'm gonna give him a second chance. 297 00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:57,190 But if he doesn't "adjust" 298 00:10:57,223 --> 00:10:59,125 it's gonna be peace out to.. 299 00:11:01,862 --> 00:11:03,129 ...both of you. 300 00:11:08,434 --> 00:11:09,936 [instrumental music] 301 00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:11,672 [audience cheering] 302 00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:16,109 Thank you, thank you for doin' this show. 303 00:11:16,142 --> 00:11:17,177 Thank you for having me. 304 00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:18,378 Listen, you guys go out 305 00:11:18,411 --> 00:11:19,780 and get Fantasia's album. 306 00:11:19,813 --> 00:11:21,381 It's called "Free Yourself." 307 00:11:21,414 --> 00:11:23,950 It's in stores now, and you be good. 308 00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:26,086 ‐ I will, man, I'm a good girl. ‐ Bet you are. 309 00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:30,223 I'm Mr. LA sayin' peace to you. 310 00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:31,324 And we're clear. 311 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,759 Thank you for coming to the show. 312 00:11:32,793 --> 00:11:34,127 Thanks. Well, I love you, Mr. LA. 313 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:36,296 ‐ Oh! ‐ Oh, we love you too. 314 00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:38,832 And I love you too. 315 00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:42,836 I voted for you 419 times. 316 00:11:44,004 --> 00:11:45,806 This is the finger that did it. 317 00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:50,076 You are so sweet 318 00:11:50,110 --> 00:11:51,444 and scary. 319 00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:55,982 I will never wash this hand again. 320 00:11:56,016 --> 00:11:57,283 I believe that. 321 00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:00,887 Hey, Fantasia, just so you know 322 00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:02,455 I don't just produce Mr. LA. 323 00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:05,091 I also produce a nationally syndicated television show 324 00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:07,127 you may have heard of it, Entertainment Tonight? 325 00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:08,461 ‐ Mm‐hm, yeah, man. ‐ Huh? 326 00:12:08,494 --> 00:12:09,963 We should do lunch. 327 00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:13,033 Man, it's 9:00 a. m. 328 00:12:15,869 --> 00:12:17,437 It's an expression. 329 00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:18,939 Here's my card. 330 00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:24,811 "Dirk Black. Producer of all things hot." 331 00:12:27,881 --> 00:12:29,816 I might as well take your word for it. 332 00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:32,085 ‐ Okay, okay. ‐ Okay? Bye, guys. 333 00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:33,954 Bye, take care, Fantasia. 334 00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:43,463 ‐ Dirk, we need to talk. ‐ What's up? 335 00:12:43,496 --> 00:12:44,965 Do you think you could tone things down a little bit 336 00:12:44,998 --> 00:12:46,199 at Entertainment Tonight? 337 00:12:46,232 --> 00:12:47,801 What are you talkin' about? 338 00:12:47,834 --> 00:12:49,402 I'm talkin' about the way you argue with Brian, man. 339 00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,104 He's ready to fire both of us. 340 00:12:51,137 --> 00:12:53,774 What? It's 'cause we're black, isn't it? 341 00:12:55,308 --> 00:12:57,410 Well, since he hasn't fired all the other black people 342 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:59,245 I'm thinkin' no. 343 00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:01,081 Look, my father taught me 344 00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:03,349 whatever I do, do the best I can. 345 00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:06,286 And the one thing I can't do is mediocrity. 346 00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:08,855 Dirk, what we're doin' is not mediocrity 347 00:13:08,889 --> 00:13:10,591 it's a step in our path. 348 00:13:10,624 --> 00:13:12,025 And after a few more steps 349 00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:13,393 we'll be in a position to do things 350 00:13:13,426 --> 00:13:14,427 the way we wanna do them 351 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:16,029 together, like we planned. 352 00:13:17,564 --> 00:13:20,000 Alright, I'm down. 353 00:13:20,033 --> 00:13:21,334 Alright? 354 00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:30,276 I can still smell her perfume on my hand. 355 00:13:31,578 --> 00:13:33,213 Well, you're lucky. 356 00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:34,515 My hands smell like tacos. 357 00:13:39,419 --> 00:13:41,254 You.. 358 00:13:41,287 --> 00:13:42,556 ...ruined it. 359 00:13:44,625 --> 00:13:46,560 [instrumental music] 360 00:13:49,095 --> 00:13:51,598 But you know how you said to me that there's no place in LA 361 00:13:51,632 --> 00:13:53,634 that has good meat loaf, right? 362 00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:56,603 I know this place does look a bit corny, but, uh.. 363 00:13:56,637 --> 00:13:58,104 ‐ Ha‐ha‐ha. ‐ What do you think? 364 00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:01,074 I mean, uh.. 365 00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:02,275 What? 366 00:14:02,308 --> 00:14:03,910 ‐ It was good. ‐ Alright. 367 00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:07,347 But, I could've made it better. 368 00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:09,550 I sense the meatloaf wasn't a big ol' hit 369 00:14:09,583 --> 00:14:12,052 and now you need to try that pecan pie. 370 00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:13,386 ‐ Let me get you a slice. ‐ Oh, well.. 371 00:14:13,419 --> 00:14:15,589 You know what, I can get it. 372 00:14:15,622 --> 00:14:17,157 I gotta see how it looks first. 373 00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:18,959 ‐ Mm‐hm. ‐ Mm. 374 00:14:21,494 --> 00:14:24,631 Okay, okay. Not bad, not bad. 375 00:14:24,665 --> 00:14:26,332 I'll take that. 376 00:14:33,106 --> 00:14:34,941 You lucky, you bigger than me. 377 00:14:34,975 --> 00:14:36,142 You lucky. 378 00:14:39,312 --> 00:14:42,048 [instrumental music] 379 00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:44,184 "On a wall 380 00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:46,386 "in the hall, maybe under a ball. 381 00:14:46,419 --> 00:14:48,622 "One by one, then suddenly all 382 00:14:48,655 --> 00:14:50,090 "with a clip and a clat 383 00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:52,492 went searching for the little boy's hat." 384 00:14:52,526 --> 00:14:55,328 ‐ What do you think? ‐ Uh, what's a clat? 385 00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:57,698 Well, I made it up. 386 00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,399 What do you think should happen next? 387 00:14:59,432 --> 00:15:02,102 Maybe, they look in the closet. 388 00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:03,670 Now, that is a good idea, Bobby. 389 00:15:03,704 --> 00:15:06,372 You are so smart. Mwah. 390 00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,141 But, ooh.. 391 00:15:08,174 --> 00:15:09,576 ...what rhymes with closet? 392 00:15:09,610 --> 00:15:13,079 Wuzzit. If you can make up words, I can too. 393 00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:17,450 [instrumental music] 394 00:15:17,483 --> 00:15:19,385 ‐ I really had a good time. ‐ Thank you. 395 00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:20,453 [chuckles] 396 00:15:20,486 --> 00:15:21,522 [cellphone ringing] 397 00:15:21,555 --> 00:15:23,156 Oh, excuse me. 398 00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,961 Hello. Hey, Sarah. 399 00:15:27,994 --> 00:15:31,031 Listen, I'm‐I'm.. Now is not a good time. 400 00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,999 Uh‐huh. Okay, well, I'll fix it tomorrow. 401 00:15:34,134 --> 00:15:35,569 'Cause I'm busy, bye. 402 00:15:37,504 --> 00:15:39,439 Did you just hang up in her face? 403 00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:41,542 Uh‐huh. I've been doin' this since I was little. 404 00:15:41,575 --> 00:15:43,644 ‐ Ha‐ha‐ha. Oh, boy. ‐ Ha‐ha‐ha. 405 00:15:43,677 --> 00:15:45,712 So, what does your sister think about us goin' out to dinner? 406 00:15:45,746 --> 00:15:47,280 She doesn't. 407 00:15:47,313 --> 00:15:48,649 Sarah's a little overprotective. 408 00:15:48,682 --> 00:15:50,717 She's run off every woman I've ever dated 409 00:15:50,751 --> 00:15:52,553 and I just don't want you to be one of 'em. 410 00:15:52,586 --> 00:15:54,354 Oh, so, what we supposed to do? 411 00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:56,422 Sneak around and pretend like we don't know each other? 412 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:57,991 [laughing] 413 00:15:59,492 --> 00:16:01,762 You cool with that, right? 414 00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:04,064 Do I look like I'm in high school to you? 415 00:16:04,097 --> 00:16:06,499 Actually, you do. Your skin all soft and smooth. 416 00:16:06,533 --> 00:16:08,068 You barely look legal. 417 00:16:08,101 --> 00:16:09,335 Well, I do moisturize 418 00:16:09,369 --> 00:16:10,470 and I do look good. 419 00:16:10,504 --> 00:16:11,505 [chuckling] 420 00:16:11,538 --> 00:16:13,173 But that's besides the point. 421 00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:14,340 You know, I don't know where this is gonna go. 422 00:16:14,374 --> 00:16:16,009 But if you wanna take me out again 423 00:16:16,042 --> 00:16:18,278 I'm not gonna be sneakin' around, I'm a grown‐ass woman. 424 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:20,046 I can see that. 425 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,482 And if we go out again, trust me, there'll be no issues. 426 00:16:22,516 --> 00:16:25,018 ‐ Well, okay. ‐ Okay. 427 00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:26,753 ‐ Well, then, I'll see you soon. ‐ Alright. 428 00:16:28,589 --> 00:16:30,356 Oh, you know somethin', how about this weekend? 429 00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:33,426 Because we're playing and, uh, I could put you 430 00:16:33,459 --> 00:16:34,728 on the guest list if you wanna come. 431 00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:36,462 Oh! 432 00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:38,799 Your band is that big where there's a guest list, huh? 433 00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:40,300 Uh‐huh, actually, there has to be 434 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,635 because we're playin' at a prom. 435 00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:44,404 [chuckles] I'm just kidding, girl. 436 00:16:44,437 --> 00:16:46,072 We're playin' at Timber Bar in Santa Monica. 437 00:16:46,106 --> 00:16:47,273 Oh.. 438 00:16:47,307 --> 00:16:48,441 I mean, well, it really didn't matter 439 00:16:48,474 --> 00:16:50,076 if you was playing at a prom. 440 00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:51,211 Just kiddin'. 441 00:16:51,244 --> 00:16:52,679 [laughing] 442 00:16:58,184 --> 00:17:00,220 ‐ Goodnight, Neesee. ‐ Goodnight. 443 00:17:00,253 --> 00:17:03,189 [instrumental music] 444 00:17:05,091 --> 00:17:07,060 [chuckles] 445 00:17:07,093 --> 00:17:10,130 So, what other events are we covering this month? 446 00:17:10,163 --> 00:17:12,599 We have a very exciting lineup. 447 00:17:12,633 --> 00:17:14,167 'We're sending camera crews' 448 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,737 to the Victoria's Secret lingerie show.. 449 00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:18,772 ...and the Westminster Dog Show. 450 00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:20,574 Wow! It sounds great, it sounds good. 451 00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:22,308 ‐ What do you guys think? ‐ 'Good.' 452 00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:23,409 ‐ 'Good?' ‐ 'Yeah.' 453 00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:25,245 Dirk, what do you think? 454 00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:29,783 I think Marcia's ideas are super‐rific. 455 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:34,087 ‐ Joy‐licious. ‐ Great. Good, good, good. 456 00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,689 Okay, since you are the new guys 457 00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:37,624 why don't you pick which event you wanna cover? 458 00:17:37,658 --> 00:17:40,827 What's it gonna be, guys? Mutts or butts? 459 00:17:40,861 --> 00:17:43,229 Well, I mean, it's tough not to choose 'em both 460 00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:46,366 but if I had to just choose one.. 461 00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:47,734 ...I'm going to the lingerie show. 462 00:17:47,768 --> 00:17:49,503 [laughing] 463 00:17:49,536 --> 00:17:51,237 Uh.. 464 00:17:52,673 --> 00:17:54,608 Dirk.. 465 00:17:54,641 --> 00:17:56,109 ...is there a problem? 466 00:17:57,343 --> 00:17:58,645 Nope. 467 00:17:58,679 --> 00:18:01,882 ‐ It's all fun‐derful. ‐ Excellent. 468 00:18:01,915 --> 00:18:05,385 It's just that I've been to a million lingerie shows.. 469 00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:08,388 ...both private and public. 470 00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:11,625 And your point is? 471 00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:13,760 That they're all the same. 472 00:18:13,794 --> 00:18:15,596 Why don't we try a fresh spin this year? 473 00:18:15,629 --> 00:18:17,430 Maybe a behind‐the‐scenes expose. 474 00:18:17,463 --> 00:18:19,299 Have a camera crew follow the models. 475 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:21,568 Get the transformation from beast to beauty. 476 00:18:21,602 --> 00:18:24,204 Ooh, that sounds, how would you put it, Dirk, um 477 00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:26,673 bad‐idea‐tastic. 478 00:18:26,707 --> 00:18:28,709 We don't have time. Anyway, uh, someone I‐‐ 479 00:18:28,742 --> 00:18:30,577 ‐ I quit! ‐ What? 480 00:18:30,611 --> 00:18:32,178 I appreciate the opportunity. 481 00:18:33,346 --> 00:18:34,715 I don't belong here. 482 00:18:37,483 --> 00:18:39,820 ‐ Dirk, what are you doin'? ‐ I'm not feelin' this, man. 483 00:18:39,853 --> 00:18:41,321 Well, if you're leavin' then I'm leavin'. 484 00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:43,857 No. You stay. 485 00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:45,726 We need to have more brothers on national TV 486 00:18:45,759 --> 00:18:47,628 other than the ones on "Cops." 487 00:18:49,362 --> 00:18:50,664 Besides, I need to be at Mr. LA 488 00:18:50,697 --> 00:18:52,265 where I have creative freedom 489 00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:54,500 and I can open the door for more brothers like us. 490 00:18:54,535 --> 00:18:56,937 Dirk, we agreed to do this together as partners. 491 00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:59,640 Listen, the best way to keep a partnership together 492 00:18:59,673 --> 00:19:00,774 is knowin' when to pass the ball 493 00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:03,276 and let your teammate take the shot. 494 00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:04,778 The lane's open, man. 495 00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:06,479 Take it to the hoop. 496 00:19:07,447 --> 00:19:08,715 Feel me? 497 00:19:09,550 --> 00:19:11,317 [sighs] 498 00:19:11,351 --> 00:19:12,619 Okay. 499 00:19:13,887 --> 00:19:15,622 Now, if you'll excuse me 500 00:19:15,656 --> 00:19:17,490 before they cut up my dental plan.. 501 00:19:18,892 --> 00:19:21,494 ...I'm going to get nine root canals. 502 00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:23,463 [instrumental music] 503 00:19:27,768 --> 00:19:30,303 [instrumental music] 504 00:19:31,772 --> 00:19:32,973 You realize when you quit 505 00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:35,441 it usually means you leave the building? 506 00:19:36,810 --> 00:19:38,512 I'm just getting some of my stuff. 507 00:19:38,545 --> 00:19:41,214 And are those pencils part of your, uh, stuff? 508 00:19:44,484 --> 00:19:46,653 Why you gotta be so cheeky? 509 00:19:46,687 --> 00:19:48,989 You know, Dirk, for whatever it's worth, um.. 510 00:19:49,022 --> 00:19:50,691 I'm sorry this didn't work out. 511 00:19:50,724 --> 00:19:54,294 ‐ No, you're not. ‐ True! 512 00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:55,662 But I didn't take you for a quitter. 513 00:19:55,696 --> 00:19:57,263 I didn't think that the, uh 514 00:19:57,297 --> 00:19:59,900 Black Hotness would cool so fast. 515 00:19:59,933 --> 00:20:01,968 Oh, hold up. Black Hotness does not cool. 516 00:20:02,002 --> 00:20:03,537 It never cools. 517 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,872 It just relocates back to Mr. LA 518 00:20:05,906 --> 00:20:08,374 where it rages on like an inferno 519 00:20:08,408 --> 00:20:09,676 burning into the night 520 00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:11,244 shinin' like a beacon for.. 521 00:20:12,445 --> 00:20:14,447 You see where I'm goin' with this. 522 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,316 ‐ Goodbye, Brian. ‐ Um, Dirk. 523 00:20:17,884 --> 00:20:20,887 Brian, there's nothin' you can say to get me back. 524 00:20:20,921 --> 00:20:22,322 Dirk.. 525 00:20:24,324 --> 00:20:25,859 ...I need your, uh 526 00:20:25,892 --> 00:20:28,662 security card and your parking pass. 527 00:20:28,695 --> 00:20:30,531 [instrumental music] 528 00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:35,335 [theme music] 37967

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