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1
00:00:00,477 --> 00:00:03,897
You guys know your dad.
I don't excel at much.
2
00:00:03,922 --> 00:00:06,589
I have no sense of direction,
the memory of a goldfish,
3
00:00:06,614 --> 00:00:09,636
and I have never once
won a game of Tic-Tac-Toe.
4
00:00:09,661 --> 00:00:11,928
But there is one thing I do better
5
00:00:11,953 --> 00:00:14,186
than literally anyone else.
6
00:00:14,272 --> 00:00:15,505
- Forget birthdays?
- Lose your keys?
7
00:00:15,530 --> 00:00:17,183
You never won at Tic-Tac-Toe?
8
00:00:17,208 --> 00:00:17,854
That's right.
9
00:00:17,879 --> 00:00:19,248
Design family Halloween costumes
10
00:00:19,273 --> 00:00:20,854
that creatively
incorporate the wheelchair.
11
00:00:20,879 --> 00:00:23,330
Now, before I unveil this year's theme,
12
00:00:23,355 --> 00:00:25,481
I'd like to make a
quick apology to Kenneth.
13
00:00:25,550 --> 00:00:26,651
You were a recent addition,
14
00:00:26,676 --> 00:00:28,561
and we did not have time
to add you to the costume.
15
00:00:28,586 --> 00:00:30,753
Why do bad things happen to good people?
16
00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:32,388
No, no, no. You want to be part of this.
17
00:00:32,629 --> 00:00:34,028
My Jimmy is an artist.
18
00:00:34,053 --> 00:00:36,059
Look, I'll show you.
19
00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:39,062
Last year, Star Wars theme.
20
00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:40,032
Oh!
21
00:00:40,057 --> 00:00:41,175
Oh, look at that one.
22
00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:43,232
Titanic. That was a big hit.
23
00:00:43,334 --> 00:00:44,901
- Jimmy!
- How about that?
24
00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:47,036
Aladdin. Magic, isn't it?
25
00:00:47,105 --> 00:00:49,572
Impressive. Quick question.
26
00:00:49,641 --> 00:00:53,409
Why are Ray and Maya
a couple in every one?
27
00:00:53,632 --> 00:00:54,933
No, we're not. That's...
28
00:00:54,958 --> 00:00:56,104
I don't think that's...
29
00:00:56,129 --> 00:00:59,649
30
00:00:59,751 --> 00:01:01,317
Agh! That's disgusting!
31
00:01:01,386 --> 00:01:04,220
- Jimmy: Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
- "Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!"
32
00:01:04,289 --> 00:01:06,155
- Oh, my God.
- Dylan: Ew, Yuck! Every year!
33
00:01:06,257 --> 00:01:07,824
Don't. No!
34
00:01:08,566 --> 00:01:10,599
It's Romeo and Juliet.
35
00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:17,300
Pizza's here!
36
00:01:17,402 --> 00:01:18,735
As is the guy who is shocked
37
00:01:18,837 --> 00:01:21,090
you had the nerve to
ask him to get you pizza.
38
00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:23,152
There it is.
39
00:01:23,341 --> 00:01:24,273
Get your brother.
40
00:01:24,375 --> 00:01:26,642
Mmm! This pizza's amazing.
41
00:01:26,977 --> 00:01:28,744
Did Gino's get a new chef or something?
42
00:01:28,868 --> 00:01:30,356
Gino's? [Chuckles]
43
00:01:30,381 --> 00:01:31,614
This is from Sal's.
44
00:01:31,716 --> 00:01:34,217
[Spits] Pizzas down!
Everyone, right now. Come on.
45
00:01:34,242 --> 00:01:35,415
- Spit it out. Out.
- Dylan: Mnh-mnh.
46
00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:36,205
- Out!
- Jimmy: Mnh-mnh.
47
00:01:36,354 --> 00:01:37,153
Spit it out.
48
00:01:37,255 --> 00:01:38,821
[Swallows]
49
00:01:38,846 --> 00:01:40,629
You traitor.
50
00:01:41,153 --> 00:01:43,403
- What am I about to learn?
- We don't order from Sal's.
51
00:01:43,428 --> 00:01:45,261
They're... dead to Maya.
52
00:01:45,363 --> 00:01:46,295
Maya: With good reason.
53
00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:47,637
They refused service
54
00:01:47,662 --> 00:01:49,075
to my disabled son.
55
00:01:49,100 --> 00:01:50,833
Well, Christmas morning,
they were closed.
56
00:01:50,935 --> 00:01:53,236
Okay. No Sal's. Understood.
57
00:01:53,338 --> 00:01:54,937
There's more. A whole list.
58
00:01:54,962 --> 00:01:56,862
Rainbow Carwash. Stefano's Dry Cleaners.
59
00:01:56,910 --> 00:01:57,876
That place.
60
00:01:57,932 --> 00:01:59,521
Don't hold my $20s up to the light.
61
00:01:59,546 --> 00:02:01,667
They're real. Give me my damn blouse!
62
00:02:01,769 --> 00:02:04,603
Eventually, the list jumped from
businesses that had wronged Maya
63
00:02:04,705 --> 00:02:06,366
to things Jimmy likes.
64
00:02:06,391 --> 00:02:08,273
Hawaiian shirts, whistling,
65
00:02:08,376 --> 00:02:09,475
- the phrase...
- Don't say it.
66
00:02:09,577 --> 00:02:11,373
- "Uh, ya think?"
- [Groans]
67
00:02:11,398 --> 00:02:14,113
You know, you should
probably learn the list.
68
00:02:14,215 --> 00:02:17,249
69
00:02:19,453 --> 00:02:20,672
You're just gonna write on the wall?
70
00:02:20,697 --> 00:02:22,797
He'll paint over it later. Right, Dad?
71
00:02:22,822 --> 00:02:23,822
Sure.
72
00:02:23,891 --> 00:02:27,660
73
00:02:27,762 --> 00:02:30,562
Energy drinks? Human pyramids?
74
00:02:30,852 --> 00:02:32,351
'90s ska music?
75
00:02:32,426 --> 00:02:33,926
What did '90s ska music do to you?
76
00:02:33,951 --> 00:02:35,034
It ruined the '90s.
77
00:02:35,136 --> 00:02:37,628
Smart. So you can study
the list at home.
78
00:02:37,653 --> 00:02:40,372
Nah. I've been looking for a way
to describe you to my family.
79
00:02:40,474 --> 00:02:42,241
[Chuckling] This tells a story.
80
00:02:42,276 --> 00:02:43,442
[Camera shutter clicks ]
[Cellphone rings]
81
00:02:43,544 --> 00:02:45,210
Huh. That's weird.
82
00:02:45,441 --> 00:02:46,719
My phone only rings when I lose it
83
00:02:46,744 --> 00:02:48,163
and make you guys call my number.
84
00:02:48,188 --> 00:02:50,344
Hi. I think you have the wrong number.
85
00:02:50,369 --> 00:02:51,193
This is Ray.
86
00:02:51,218 --> 00:02:52,828
Jillian: Hey, Ray. It's Jillian.
87
00:02:52,853 --> 00:02:54,453
Really?
88
00:02:55,523 --> 00:02:57,084
Jillian, hi.
89
00:02:57,109 --> 00:03:00,274
So, you probably heard
Zane and I broke up.
90
00:03:00,299 --> 00:03:02,538
I... did not hear that.
91
00:03:02,563 --> 00:03:04,163
[Cellphone beeps]
92
00:03:04,231 --> 00:03:06,815
[On speakerphone] Anyway, I'm
running the school's haunted house
93
00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:09,201
fundraiser on Halloween night.
94
00:03:09,303 --> 00:03:11,595
Zane was in charge of a room.
95
00:03:11,620 --> 00:03:12,986
He dropped out.
96
00:03:13,207 --> 00:03:15,095
[Cellphone beeps]
I need you to fill in for him.
97
00:03:15,120 --> 00:03:16,553
Yeah, I think I can make that work.
98
00:03:16,578 --> 00:03:17,610
Thanks, Ray.
99
00:03:17,635 --> 00:03:19,098
I'll see you at the meeting tomorrow.
100
00:03:19,123 --> 00:03:22,114
Cool. I like this phone chemistry.
101
00:03:22,762 --> 00:03:23,761
Hello?
102
00:03:23,786 --> 00:03:26,387
Here. Try on this jacket.
103
00:03:27,124 --> 00:03:28,523
Oh, perfect!
104
00:03:28,548 --> 00:03:32,068
Who needs Tic-Tac-Toe? Halloween! Ugh!
105
00:03:32,093 --> 00:03:33,792
106
00:03:34,150 --> 00:03:36,317
You guys heard about my
party Halloween night, right?
107
00:03:36,342 --> 00:03:37,606
Gonna be sick.
108
00:03:37,889 --> 00:03:40,724
I'm sure it's not gonna be as
fun as your Oedipal nightmare.
109
00:03:40,856 --> 00:03:43,189
[Chuckles]
110
00:03:44,608 --> 00:03:45,840
Hey, JJ.
111
00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:49,427
"Can I come to your party?"
112
00:03:49,452 --> 00:03:51,085
- Wait, what?
- Dude, totally.
113
00:03:51,187 --> 00:03:52,587
I just wasn't you sure you could.
114
00:03:52,655 --> 00:03:55,022
"Great. See you there."
115
00:03:55,125 --> 00:03:56,822
Cool.
116
00:03:56,847 --> 00:03:58,480
[Sighs] No, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
117
00:03:58,505 --> 00:04:00,572
You already have plans and so do I.
118
00:04:01,321 --> 00:04:03,846
"It's a P-A... party.
119
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:06,344
I want a high school experience
120
00:04:06,446 --> 00:04:09,614
like in 'American
Pie' or 'Bring It On!'"
121
00:04:09,716 --> 00:04:12,005
Yeah, and I want to sing "Monster Mash"
122
00:04:12,030 --> 00:04:13,785
at Spooky Karaoke at the mini-mall.
123
00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:16,487
124
00:04:16,589 --> 00:04:18,356
Fine. I'll sing "Monster Mash"
125
00:04:18,715 --> 00:04:21,282
next weekend at normal
karaoke like an idiot.
126
00:04:23,563 --> 00:04:27,265
[Sighing]
127
00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:31,002
Ray, I love you, buddy, but
the next sigh will be your last.
128
00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:33,338
I have to bail on the family costume.
129
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,740
What? No, you can't do that to Dad.
130
00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:37,642
But Jillian asked me to help
out at the haunted house.
131
00:04:37,744 --> 00:04:39,610
Really? That sounds awesome.
132
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:41,646
He'll just have to
understand. We're doing that.
133
00:04:41,748 --> 00:04:43,114
We? No.
134
00:04:43,183 --> 00:04:44,549
You have to do the costume with JJ.
135
00:04:44,651 --> 00:04:45,550
[Grunts]
136
00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:48,189
"I have a party."
137
00:04:48,214 --> 00:04:49,413
He has a party.
138
00:04:49,438 --> 00:04:51,622
No! Not you, too!
139
00:04:51,725 --> 00:04:53,191
Stop lasering me!
140
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,492
We can't all bail!
141
00:04:54,517 --> 00:04:55,341
You're right.
142
00:04:55,366 --> 00:04:57,066
I guess it's just a
question of who bails first.
143
00:04:59,372 --> 00:05:00,371
Dad!
144
00:05:00,396 --> 00:05:01,534
Dad, please wake up.
It's super important.
145
00:05:01,559 --> 00:05:02,889
- Me too. Mine's more important.
- I really need to tell you something.
146
00:05:02,914 --> 00:05:04,115
- It can't wait till morning.
- Matters of the heart are at stake.
147
00:05:04,140 --> 00:05:07,022
- We need to talk to Dad.
- What? At this hour?
148
00:05:07,484 --> 00:05:09,851
You know he goes into
a medical coma at night.
149
00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:10,908
Don't you? I mean, look at him.
150
00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:12,910
- [Snoring starts, stops]
- Look at that.
151
00:05:13,278 --> 00:05:15,056
See? What's so damn important?
152
00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:16,647
We all have plans for Halloween.
153
00:05:16,716 --> 00:05:19,684
[Gasps] But it's our tradition.
154
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:22,387
You know how much he loves the costume.
155
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:25,089
This man does so much for us.
156
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,824
He's got such a good heart.
157
00:05:26,893 --> 00:05:29,014
He works so hard to
provide for this family.
158
00:05:29,039 --> 00:05:30,931
I mean, look at the
calluses on that hand.
159
00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:33,011
Jillian needs me. This
might be my big chance.
160
00:05:33,589 --> 00:05:35,977
"And I have a party."
161
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:38,336
A... party? Really?
162
00:05:39,213 --> 00:05:41,149
"Why should I be left out?
163
00:05:41,354 --> 00:05:43,187
I deserve this."
164
00:05:43,943 --> 00:05:44,827
[Sighs]
165
00:05:44,852 --> 00:05:46,285
And I like spooky stuff.
166
00:05:47,304 --> 00:05:48,713
Maybe I should have gone before JJ.
167
00:05:49,413 --> 00:05:50,715
Okay.
168
00:05:50,945 --> 00:05:53,684
All right, if you're gonna do this...
169
00:05:53,709 --> 00:05:55,608
he's gonna take it very hard.
170
00:05:56,541 --> 00:05:57,501
Yeah.
171
00:05:57,526 --> 00:05:59,390
I'll be the one to tell him. Go on.
172
00:05:59,645 --> 00:06:00,877
Bugger off back to bed.
173
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:05,196
Oh.
174
00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:07,398
You poor, sweet thing.
175
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:09,033
Mm.
176
00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:10,301
[Groans]
177
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:12,503
You starting something?
178
00:06:12,605 --> 00:06:14,806
179
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:17,008
Jillian: Everyone, please settle.
180
00:06:17,110 --> 00:06:18,696
I'd like to call this meeting to order.
181
00:06:18,721 --> 00:06:20,178
Dylan: I see why you like this chick.
182
00:06:20,439 --> 00:06:22,472
- [Imitates snoring]
- Stop it!
183
00:06:22,497 --> 00:06:23,548
The event's tomorrow.
184
00:06:23,616 --> 00:06:25,316
We have to plan a room from scratch.
185
00:06:25,418 --> 00:06:26,317
Let's brainstorm.
186
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,619
I have an idea. Or more of a notion.
187
00:06:28,644 --> 00:06:31,578
Is there is anything in cobwebs?
188
00:06:33,171 --> 00:06:36,294
Off that, perhaps... jack-o'-lanterns.
189
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:37,295
Interesting.
190
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:38,529
Look, I know scary.
191
00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:39,597
Here's what we're gonna do.
192
00:06:39,699 --> 00:06:41,466
We need blood. Real blood.
193
00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:43,033
Human, pig... whatever.
194
00:06:43,058 --> 00:06:45,465
And there's tons of
websites that sell cadavers.
195
00:06:45,490 --> 00:06:46,437
I'm sorry about...
196
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:48,172
Shh, shh! Keep going, Dylan.
197
00:06:48,274 --> 00:06:49,651
I'm thinking of a torture room
198
00:06:49,676 --> 00:06:51,642
where people actually get waterboarded
199
00:06:51,667 --> 00:06:52,900
for a couple of seconds.
200
00:06:53,030 --> 00:06:55,213
I saw how to do it
on "Locked Up Abroad."
201
00:06:55,565 --> 00:06:56,335
It's safe.
202
00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:57,659
This is amazing!
203
00:06:57,684 --> 00:06:59,717
You're exactly what this
committee's been missing.
204
00:06:59,786 --> 00:07:01,352
You like that stuff?
205
00:07:01,969 --> 00:07:04,503
'Cause we both came up with it together.
206
00:07:04,828 --> 00:07:06,224
Why don't you design the room?
207
00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:08,126
208
00:07:08,228 --> 00:07:09,260
Done.
209
00:07:10,663 --> 00:07:14,031
- [Snoring]
- Stop it!
210
00:07:17,003 --> 00:07:20,338
[Clattering]
211
00:07:20,406 --> 00:07:22,673
That is the most amazing costume.
212
00:07:22,775 --> 00:07:24,242
What is it? Is it a spaceship?
213
00:07:25,137 --> 00:07:27,466
It's the DeLorean from
"Back to the Future."
214
00:07:27,491 --> 00:07:28,791
Before my time.
215
00:07:30,304 --> 00:07:31,694
I got some bad news.
216
00:07:31,930 --> 00:07:33,784
[Sighs]
217
00:07:34,216 --> 00:07:35,114
When are you due?
218
00:07:35,139 --> 00:07:36,896
Not that.
219
00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:39,993
The... The kids aren't gonna
do family costume this year.
220
00:07:40,018 --> 00:07:41,292
They're ditching us for Halloween.
221
00:07:42,254 --> 00:07:43,961
[Tool clatters]
222
00:07:44,063 --> 00:07:45,096
Oh.
223
00:07:46,786 --> 00:07:48,633
That physically hurts.
224
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:51,235
Well, I mean, you knew
this day was coming.
225
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:52,603
They are growing up.
226
00:07:54,158 --> 00:07:56,240
Agh. It's my fault.
227
00:07:56,474 --> 00:07:58,747
I shouldn't have half-assed
the costume this year.
228
00:07:59,457 --> 00:08:02,458
[Whirring]
229
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,450
[Knock on door]
230
00:08:06,553 --> 00:08:08,252
JJ, your ride's here.
231
00:08:09,662 --> 00:08:13,030
Trick or treat
232
00:08:16,429 --> 00:08:17,395
[Door closes]
233
00:08:17,420 --> 00:08:19,320
[Stammers]
234
00:08:20,595 --> 00:08:22,877
No costumes. Got it.
235
00:08:22,902 --> 00:08:24,602
All right, buddy. Let's hit the road.
236
00:08:25,471 --> 00:08:26,604
We're heading out, too.
237
00:08:26,706 --> 00:08:28,773
Thanks again for being
so cool about this, Dad.
238
00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:29,558
It's all good.
239
00:08:29,583 --> 00:08:31,269
I got stuff I can do
around the house, anyway.
240
00:08:31,294 --> 00:08:32,626
Like paint over that wall?
241
00:08:32,651 --> 00:08:35,213
- Sure.
- Okay. Have fun! Be safe, everyone!
242
00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:38,397
Oh, and, Kenneth, if JJ comes
back with so much as a scratch...
243
00:08:38,422 --> 00:08:40,507
You'll tie me down and make
me watch you eat my cat.
244
00:08:40,532 --> 00:08:41,814
- Yes, I will.
- Happy Halloween.
245
00:08:41,815 --> 00:08:43,110
And to you.
246
00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:48,326
Well, that went well.
247
00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:49,427
Nobody even cried.
248
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,329
Well, someone did.
249
00:08:51,959 --> 00:08:53,164
Eh.
250
00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:56,500
Okay, whenever I'm a wreck,
251
00:08:56,943 --> 00:09:00,304
and it hasn't happened
that many times... today...
252
00:09:00,406 --> 00:09:03,207
you always find a way
to lift my spirits.
253
00:09:03,386 --> 00:09:04,519
Now it's my turn.
254
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,978
Tonight, for one night only,
255
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,980
in the spirit of Halloween,
256
00:09:09,005 --> 00:09:13,007
I hereby undead the whole list.
257
00:09:13,757 --> 00:09:15,286
- Cologne?
- Mm-hmm.
258
00:09:15,311 --> 00:09:16,320
- Puns?
- Yep.
259
00:09:16,345 --> 00:09:17,632
- Tighty-whities?
- Mm-hmm.
260
00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:20,028
- Excited?
- Uh, ya think?
261
00:09:20,763 --> 00:09:21,726
Even that.
262
00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:22,827
[Dance music plays]
263
00:09:22,929 --> 00:09:24,829
Hey! Hey!
264
00:09:24,931 --> 00:09:26,631
Get crazy
265
00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:29,000
Hey! Hey!
266
00:09:29,239 --> 00:09:31,907
Okay, so this is a lot more
intense than I expected.
267
00:09:32,224 --> 00:09:34,672
Uh, okay, JJ. Um, you know what?
268
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:38,676
Maybe we just take a spin
through and head home.
269
00:09:39,602 --> 00:09:44,649
"Maybe you get me a B-E-E-R."
270
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:47,184
Okay. I think you misspelled "soda."
271
00:09:47,287 --> 00:09:48,756
Make my body rock
272
00:09:48,781 --> 00:09:50,554
Hey, JJ.
273
00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:53,577
Okay. I'm... I'm dead.
274
00:09:53,628 --> 00:09:58,287
James DiMeo, my love.
Welcome to everything I hate.
275
00:09:58,678 --> 00:10:00,645
- [Ska music plays]
- Ugh.
276
00:10:00,747 --> 00:10:02,881
Off we go.
277
00:10:02,983 --> 00:10:06,484
278
00:10:07,011 --> 00:10:08,644
[Exhales sharply]
279
00:10:09,099 --> 00:10:10,198
Huh?
280
00:10:10,223 --> 00:10:12,991
281
00:10:23,603 --> 00:10:25,003
282
00:10:28,041 --> 00:10:29,340
[Clatter]
283
00:10:30,890 --> 00:10:32,777
[Breathing heavily]
284
00:10:32,879 --> 00:10:34,579
Is this gonna be scary enough?
285
00:10:34,658 --> 00:10:36,387
Pace more. That'll help.
286
00:10:36,412 --> 00:10:39,050
It's just got to be
really scary for Jillian.
287
00:10:39,119 --> 00:10:41,519
See, there's this phenomenon
that I read about online.
288
00:10:41,555 --> 00:10:43,034
Why do all of your romantic plans
289
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,589
start with an Internet search?
290
00:10:44,614 --> 00:10:46,376
If someone is truly terrified,
291
00:10:46,401 --> 00:10:47,926
their emotions are so raw
292
00:10:47,994 --> 00:10:50,161
that they easily slip
into a state of arousal.
293
00:10:50,531 --> 00:10:52,007
It's called "scarousal."
294
00:10:52,032 --> 00:10:54,165
Ray, I'm very scared of you right now,
295
00:10:54,204 --> 00:10:56,538
and I can assure you, I'm not aroused.
296
00:10:57,848 --> 00:10:59,370
So, how's this gonna work here?
297
00:10:59,395 --> 00:11:01,464
You're the doctor, I'm the patient?
I'm just gonna pop out
298
00:11:01,489 --> 00:11:03,002
- when they enter, or...
- Oh, my God.
299
00:11:03,027 --> 00:11:04,209
Okay.
300
00:11:04,311 --> 00:11:06,277
You're gonna be
camouflaged with that wall.
301
00:11:06,346 --> 00:11:09,447
When people walk in, they're
gonna be focusing on this dummy.
302
00:11:09,549 --> 00:11:10,836
Then you're gonna pop out of the wall
303
00:11:10,861 --> 00:11:12,217
and scare the bejesus out of them.
304
00:11:12,242 --> 00:11:13,170
Got it?
305
00:11:13,195 --> 00:11:14,652
I don't know. Is that gonna work?
306
00:11:14,721 --> 00:11:17,502
I mean, this is my best chance
that I'm gonna have with Jillian.
307
00:11:17,527 --> 00:11:19,857
Honestly, I can't imagine
anyone being frightened by...
308
00:11:19,926 --> 00:11:22,093
- Boo!
- Aaaah!
309
00:11:22,162 --> 00:11:24,062
Yes! Do that! That works!
310
00:11:24,130 --> 00:11:25,697
[Chanting "Chug, chug"]
311
00:11:25,799 --> 00:11:27,198
Kenneth: C-H... "Chug."
312
00:11:27,334 --> 00:11:28,700
C-H... "Chug."
313
00:11:28,802 --> 00:11:30,435
C-H... Yeah, I get the pattern.
314
00:11:31,436 --> 00:11:33,236
No! No beer.
315
00:11:33,907 --> 00:11:36,149
Come on, man. Let the kid have a drink.
316
00:11:36,174 --> 00:11:38,543
You're gonna exclude
him 'cause he's disabled?
317
00:11:38,645 --> 00:11:40,378
That's discrimination.
318
00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:42,146
Uh, wait, what?
319
00:11:42,249 --> 00:11:43,781
Put your picket signs down.
320
00:11:43,850 --> 00:11:46,818
I'm not gonna get a civil rights
lesson by two blond teenagers.
321
00:11:47,045 --> 00:11:47,977
Now, shoo.
322
00:11:49,122 --> 00:11:53,024
"At least water in a red cup"?
323
00:11:53,955 --> 00:11:56,961
Now, that, I can do.
324
00:11:57,063 --> 00:11:59,697
[Rap music plays]
325
00:12:01,865 --> 00:12:04,199
Ben: "He's gone. Beer me."
326
00:12:05,059 --> 00:12:07,071
Sick!
327
00:12:08,375 --> 00:12:10,214
Oh, babe. Thank you so much.
328
00:12:10,239 --> 00:12:11,922
You have really cheered me up tonight.
329
00:12:11,947 --> 00:12:13,611
Aww. I know how to take care of you.
330
00:12:13,636 --> 00:12:15,236
- You don't need those kids.
- Nah!
331
00:12:15,469 --> 00:12:16,736
Now, about the music.
332
00:12:16,761 --> 00:12:18,094
I'm fine with the ska,
333
00:12:18,119 --> 00:12:20,996
but do we have to play the same
song over and over and over?
334
00:12:21,021 --> 00:12:22,654
Oh, these have all been different songs.
335
00:12:22,799 --> 00:12:23,898
Yeah, it's just what it is.
336
00:12:23,923 --> 00:12:25,089
[Doorbell rings]
337
00:12:25,158 --> 00:12:26,291
[Ska music plays]
338
00:12:28,632 --> 00:12:30,295
Together: Trick or treat!
339
00:12:30,330 --> 00:12:33,054
Oh, look at the little angels.
340
00:12:33,445 --> 00:12:35,300
Two boys and one girl, like ours.
341
00:12:35,402 --> 00:12:36,801
Jimmy, look.
342
00:12:36,836 --> 00:12:39,771
Oh, I forgot how sweet
the little ones are.
343
00:12:39,873 --> 00:12:41,372
[Voice breaking] You were right.
344
00:12:41,441 --> 00:12:42,692
We've lost so much.
345
00:12:42,717 --> 00:12:44,142
What? No. No.
346
00:12:44,167 --> 00:12:46,156
I'm finally feeling
better. Don't you start.
347
00:12:46,467 --> 00:12:48,039
Uh, is everything okay?
348
00:12:48,188 --> 00:12:50,421
For you. For now.
349
00:12:50,748 --> 00:12:54,183
Our babies are gone. Forever.
350
00:12:54,888 --> 00:12:56,454
Oh, growing up. Not dead.
351
00:12:56,556 --> 00:12:58,589
No, nobody dies. Ever. It's fine.
352
00:12:58,950 --> 00:13:01,350
Wait. You have a family costume.
353
00:13:02,562 --> 00:13:03,861
Who sent you?!
354
00:13:03,963 --> 00:13:05,630
[Screaming in distance]
355
00:13:05,732 --> 00:13:07,565
Jillian's coming! Do
not mess this up.
356
00:13:07,634 --> 00:13:09,200
The stakes could not be higher.
357
00:13:09,269 --> 00:13:11,137
Why'd you say that? How does that help?
358
00:13:12,939 --> 00:13:16,295
Whoa. This is the scariest room yet.
359
00:13:16,415 --> 00:13:19,416
Yeah, I see they took my cobweb
idea and really ran with it.
360
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:22,580
- Agh!
- Aaah!
361
00:13:24,058 --> 00:13:25,424
I got you, girl.
362
00:13:26,854 --> 00:13:28,720
I've been waiting since the second grade
363
00:13:28,745 --> 00:13:29,810
to hear you say that.
364
00:13:29,889 --> 00:13:31,940
365
00:13:31,965 --> 00:13:35,199
Hey, that's my scarousal!
Jillian, how could you?!
366
00:13:35,224 --> 00:13:36,924
Why did I even do this haunted house?!
367
00:13:37,230 --> 00:13:39,530
To raise money for the
National Honor Society?
368
00:13:40,161 --> 00:13:41,494
Gah!
369
00:13:41,680 --> 00:13:43,139
You are so annoying.
370
00:13:43,164 --> 00:13:45,002
You and Ray would be perfect together!
371
00:13:45,105 --> 00:13:46,838
[Screams]
372
00:13:48,341 --> 00:13:50,206
- [Dance music plays]
- Kenneth: See?
373
00:13:50,231 --> 00:13:52,076
You don't need beer.
374
00:13:52,178 --> 00:13:56,481
"Can you get me a tissue?"
375
00:13:56,583 --> 00:13:57,882
You got it, boss.
376
00:13:57,984 --> 00:13:59,751
377
00:13:59,853 --> 00:14:00,628
Ben: "Now."
378
00:14:00,653 --> 00:14:03,588
379
00:14:06,192 --> 00:14:07,525
Here you go, buddy.
380
00:14:08,416 --> 00:14:11,729
"I'm cold. Can you get my jacket?"
381
00:14:11,908 --> 00:14:13,241
Sure.
382
00:14:13,266 --> 00:14:16,300
383
00:14:23,610 --> 00:14:26,288
"My other jacket."
384
00:14:26,313 --> 00:14:27,912
Unh
385
00:14:28,014 --> 00:14:29,380
Yeah, yeah, yeah
386
00:14:29,482 --> 00:14:31,315
Unh
387
00:14:31,418 --> 00:14:33,451
Unh
388
00:14:33,553 --> 00:14:35,953
Unh
389
00:14:36,055 --> 00:14:37,388
Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
390
00:14:37,490 --> 00:14:39,424
Yo, it's KU, allow
me to introduce you
391
00:14:39,526 --> 00:14:41,959
392
00:14:42,061 --> 00:14:45,062
[Laughter]
393
00:14:45,165 --> 00:14:46,764
What's going on here?
394
00:14:46,866 --> 00:14:48,566
What are you saying?
395
00:14:48,668 --> 00:14:50,701
"I...
396
00:14:50,804 --> 00:14:53,971
Nresd tdbjdhortethl."
397
00:14:54,073 --> 00:14:56,552
Dude! You're slurring your words.
398
00:14:56,577 --> 00:14:58,743
Son of a bitch. Are you drunk?
399
00:14:58,845 --> 00:15:01,546
[Laughs]
400
00:15:04,384 --> 00:15:05,950
Where are you going?
401
00:15:06,052 --> 00:15:08,085
Pull over! Pull over!
402
00:15:08,877 --> 00:15:11,980
JJ! I can't believe you did this to me.
403
00:15:12,005 --> 00:15:15,501
"What's the big shhdeal?"
404
00:15:15,557 --> 00:15:17,623
I'll tell you what the big "shhdeal" is.
405
00:15:17,726 --> 00:15:19,826
I'm working hard to
earn your parents' trust,
406
00:15:19,851 --> 00:15:20,971
and I can't trust you?
407
00:15:20,996 --> 00:15:23,429
When we get home, let me handle this.
408
00:15:23,498 --> 00:15:25,898
And stop running over
my damn foot, Alky!
409
00:15:26,001 --> 00:15:29,769
Thought it couldn't get worse,but then my phone died
410
00:15:29,838 --> 00:15:31,611
It was a landslide
411
00:15:31,636 --> 00:15:34,530
- This is not the right "Landslide."
- No, it's not Stevie Nicks. No.
412
00:15:34,847 --> 00:15:36,813
We don't matter to our
kids anymore, darling.
413
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:39,108
Guess we better get used to
many more nights like this one.
414
00:15:39,133 --> 00:15:41,801
So we're not their best friends anymore.
415
00:15:42,045 --> 00:15:43,678
You're still my best friend.
416
00:15:46,665 --> 00:15:48,865
And I'm your best friend.
417
00:15:48,890 --> 00:15:50,923
- Oh, yeah, definitely.
- Mm-hmm.
418
00:15:51,026 --> 00:15:53,993
Who needs the kids, right?
419
00:15:54,237 --> 00:15:56,003
- We don't need the kids.
- Nah.
420
00:15:56,028 --> 00:15:57,827
- We have each other.
- Yeah.
421
00:15:58,466 --> 00:16:00,066
- Oh, thank God.
- Oh, thank God they're here.
422
00:16:00,101 --> 00:16:02,969
- Welcome home, sweetheart.
- Hey! How was your night?
423
00:16:03,071 --> 00:16:04,037
Terrible!
424
00:16:04,939 --> 00:16:07,050
- He seems upset.
- I know. I think he needs his mummy.
425
00:16:07,075 --> 00:16:09,074
Really? A boy and his
dad... It's a whole thing.
426
00:16:10,311 --> 00:16:11,978
Both: Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!
427
00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:12,912
- Yes!
- Damn it!
428
00:16:12,981 --> 00:16:15,181
Yes! Yes! Coming, darling.
429
00:16:15,250 --> 00:16:16,215
I need help!
430
00:16:16,317 --> 00:16:17,350
Ooh, I'll take her. She's easier.
431
00:16:17,452 --> 00:16:18,284
Mm.
432
00:16:18,956 --> 00:16:20,338
It's killing me, Dad.
433
00:16:20,363 --> 00:16:22,855
She kissed another guy.
I don't know what to do.
434
00:16:23,374 --> 00:16:24,901
Are you saying you need me?
435
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:26,036
Yeah.
436
00:16:27,482 --> 00:16:28,805
I'm in love with her.
437
00:16:28,997 --> 00:16:30,507
What's wrong with me?
438
00:16:30,532 --> 00:16:32,432
Why doesn't she feel the same way?
439
00:16:32,691 --> 00:16:34,361
Mummy's here, darling. What is it?
440
00:16:34,386 --> 00:16:36,396
I spilt pig's blood
on my favorite jeans.
441
00:16:36,421 --> 00:16:38,165
Weird problem. I'll take it.
442
00:16:38,329 --> 00:16:39,672
Ray: The thing about Jillian is...
443
00:16:39,707 --> 00:16:43,246
the moment I saw her,
I was crazy about her.
444
00:16:43,271 --> 00:16:46,868
The thing about pig's blood
is it just smells so bad.
445
00:16:46,893 --> 00:16:50,616
I've tried everything...
being funny, playing it cool.
446
00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:53,218
Rubbing, dabbing, soda water.
447
00:16:53,460 --> 00:16:55,888
I think there's one more
thing you have to try.
448
00:16:55,957 --> 00:16:57,939
[Sighs]
449
00:16:57,964 --> 00:16:59,097
Let her go.
450
00:17:00,286 --> 00:17:01,327
When you find the right person,
451
00:17:01,389 --> 00:17:03,022
you're not gonna have to work so hard
452
00:17:03,829 --> 00:17:08,367
'cause she'll see in
you what you see in her.
453
00:17:08,605 --> 00:17:09,813
Maya: Let them go.
454
00:17:10,276 --> 00:17:12,839
There are stains on here
that are much, much worse.
455
00:17:12,984 --> 00:17:15,318
Absolutely disgusting,
actually. Revolting.
456
00:17:15,566 --> 00:17:16,565
[Gags]
457
00:17:18,026 --> 00:17:19,579
Thanks, Dad.
458
00:17:22,152 --> 00:17:23,285
Dylan: Thanks, Mom, but...
459
00:17:23,945 --> 00:17:25,985
- I'm keeping them.
- All right.
460
00:17:27,956 --> 00:17:30,756
[Sighs] All right. Now,
let me handle this, okay?
461
00:17:30,859 --> 00:17:32,191
Lose the smile.
462
00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:34,163
- JJ!
- Oh! Hey!
463
00:17:34,188 --> 00:17:36,496
- Hey, buddy! How'd it go?
- Hey!
464
00:17:36,598 --> 00:17:39,599
"My first high-school party was great!"
465
00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:43,102
Yeah. "But all that fun
has me feeling tired.
466
00:17:43,171 --> 00:17:44,403
I'm gonna hit the hay."
467
00:17:44,428 --> 00:17:45,963
- You heard the man.
- [Laughs]
468
00:17:45,988 --> 00:17:47,874
Oh, darling, we missed you.
469
00:17:47,899 --> 00:17:49,142
Go on. Give us the highlights.
470
00:17:49,244 --> 00:17:51,347
What was the most fun
thing at your party?
471
00:17:51,394 --> 00:17:53,661
Uh, well, first...
472
00:17:53,982 --> 00:17:57,617
Oh, that's right!
Looking up at the stars.
473
00:17:58,378 --> 00:18:01,287
Uh, come along, my little
Neil deGrasse Tyson.
474
00:18:01,389 --> 00:18:04,223
Time to... time to
dream of constellations.
475
00:18:04,325 --> 00:18:05,635
All right, well, night-night, darling.
476
00:18:05,660 --> 00:18:06,726
Sweet dreams, buddy.
477
00:18:07,406 --> 00:18:09,439
[Vomits]
478
00:18:11,562 --> 00:18:13,762
Bloody hell! He is drunk!
479
00:18:15,828 --> 00:18:18,057
I cannot believe you let this happen.
480
00:18:18,082 --> 00:18:20,018
You, sir, are going on the wall.
481
00:18:20,043 --> 00:18:21,242
I'm sorry.
482
00:18:21,267 --> 00:18:23,465
I said I would take
care of him and, um...
483
00:18:24,447 --> 00:18:26,280
- Yeah, I screwed up.
- You certainly did.
484
00:18:27,383 --> 00:18:29,417
Jimmy: "He didn't know.
485
00:18:29,581 --> 00:18:33,144
I T-R-I... tricked him"?
486
00:18:33,221 --> 00:18:34,866
Oh, good! See?
487
00:18:34,891 --> 00:18:37,925
I was down to take the hit,
but this little bitch played me.
488
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:38,685
All right, well...
489
00:18:38,710 --> 00:18:40,375
- that's a bit much, actually.
- Easy!
490
00:18:40,542 --> 00:18:42,618
I'm very disappointed in you, JJ.
491
00:18:42,643 --> 00:18:43,709
[Laughs]
492
00:18:43,812 --> 00:18:45,392
At least he's a happy
drunk, though, right?
493
00:18:45,417 --> 00:18:49,317
Drinking at 16. There
will be consequences.
494
00:18:49,472 --> 00:18:52,039
What are the consequences?
We have never punished him.
495
00:18:52,064 --> 00:18:53,317
Well, w-we'll ground him.
496
00:18:53,342 --> 00:18:54,978
You are grounded for one year.
497
00:18:55,003 --> 00:18:56,110
Three weeks.
498
00:18:56,212 --> 00:18:57,457
Why don't we just do a whole month?
499
00:18:57,482 --> 00:18:59,416
- I feel like that's what they did
on "Growing Pains." - [Groans]
500
00:18:59,873 --> 00:19:02,049
It's gonna take a lot to earn
back our trust, young man.
501
00:19:02,552 --> 00:19:04,485
Oh, that was good!
502
00:19:04,587 --> 00:19:06,053
[Laughs]
503
00:19:06,593 --> 00:19:09,200
Okay. I know we're disappointed.
504
00:19:09,225 --> 00:19:10,651
He's grounded. Blah, blah, blah.
505
00:19:10,676 --> 00:19:12,987
But was that not fantastic?
506
00:19:13,082 --> 00:19:15,506
We just grounded our special-needs son
507
00:19:15,531 --> 00:19:17,231
for being a normal teenager.
508
00:19:17,288 --> 00:19:18,723
Eh, well, we don't say normal.
509
00:19:18,748 --> 00:19:21,248
All right. For being
an idiot teenager.
510
00:19:21,273 --> 00:19:22,246
Exactly.
511
00:19:22,348 --> 00:19:23,681
Dude.
512
00:19:23,839 --> 00:19:25,543
Not cool, what you did tonight.
513
00:19:25,901 --> 00:19:28,453
I know that you're a teenager
and you're gonna try to have fun
514
00:19:28,478 --> 00:19:31,812
and try to break the rules,
but I'm your caretaker,
515
00:19:31,851 --> 00:19:33,651
which means I'm gonna try to stop you.
516
00:19:36,385 --> 00:19:39,019
But between you and me...
517
00:19:39,337 --> 00:19:42,323
in this little game of cat-and-mouse,
518
00:19:42,752 --> 00:19:46,327
the friend part of me wants you to win.
519
00:19:48,664 --> 00:19:50,110
I feel very comfortable telling you this
520
00:19:50,135 --> 00:19:51,701
'cause you're not gonna remember
any of it in the morning.
521
00:19:51,901 --> 00:19:55,236
- [Laughs]
- Now I'm gonna go back to that party.
522
00:19:55,338 --> 00:19:57,505
You got a text that the cops showed up.
523
00:19:57,573 --> 00:20:00,007
I want to see a bunch of
white kids getting handcuffed.
524
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,465
[Laughs]
525
00:20:01,644 --> 00:20:05,683
It turns out our kids still
have room for us in their lives.
526
00:20:05,708 --> 00:20:07,225
Yeah. Maybe not for the fun stuff,
527
00:20:07,250 --> 00:20:11,204
but for problems... teenage
problems, love problems.
528
00:20:11,229 --> 00:20:12,853
Pig blood problems.
529
00:20:12,955 --> 00:20:15,289
I need to drown my sorrows.
Do we have any candy?
530
00:20:15,314 --> 00:20:17,548
Yeah. It's Halloween and I
haven't had any all night.
531
00:20:19,662 --> 00:20:21,162
I know where we can get some.
532
00:20:21,264 --> 00:20:24,298
["Back to the Future" score plays]
533
00:20:32,808 --> 00:20:35,509
I feel like I fit in, right?
534
00:20:35,534 --> 00:20:36,554
You happy, darling?
535
00:20:36,579 --> 00:20:37,678
Very happy.
536
00:20:37,747 --> 00:20:38,979
I definitely am.
537
00:20:39,004 --> 00:20:40,699
For once, Mom and I aren't a couple.
538
00:20:40,724 --> 00:20:42,760
Well, not in the past, but
in the part that plays out
539
00:20:42,785 --> 00:20:43,535
in the present day...
540
00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:44,593
Yeah, we don't need it.
541
00:20:44,618 --> 00:20:46,764
Are any of these houses
open? I want candy.
542
00:20:46,789 --> 00:20:49,423
We'll find one. It's only 1:45.
543
00:20:49,525 --> 00:20:52,560
544
00:20:55,331 --> 00:20:57,492
[Electricity crackling]
545
00:20:57,516 --> 00:20:59,916
Synced and corrected by Octavia
- www.addic7ed.com -
546
00:20:59,966 --> 00:21:04,516
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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