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1
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[Music playing faintly]
2
00:00:02,502 --> 00:00:04,435
Guys, we made it.
3
00:00:04,470 --> 00:00:06,971
We're finally invited to
a party with the cool kids.
4
00:00:07,006 --> 00:00:08,539
That's right, boys.
5
00:00:08,574 --> 00:00:10,875
Once again, we're
being socially rewarded
6
00:00:10,910 --> 00:00:12,510
thanks to my...
7
00:00:12,545 --> 00:00:15,246
[Imitates Kermit the frog]
Kermit the frog voice.
8
00:00:15,281 --> 00:00:17,314
- Wocka, wocka, wocka.
- We're at the door.
9
00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:19,350
Seriously, guys. Shut the [Bleep] up.
10
00:00:19,385 --> 00:00:21,018
[Doorbell rings]
11
00:00:21,020 --> 00:00:23,354
Oh, this is great. You guys came!
12
00:00:23,406 --> 00:00:25,956
Of course. One needn't always watch
13
00:00:25,992 --> 00:00:28,225
"C.S.I. Cyber" the night that it airs.
14
00:00:28,261 --> 00:00:31,061
[Laughs] Turn your invitations over.
15
00:00:31,125 --> 00:00:33,961
_
16
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,868
Oh, no, the back! Why
didn't we read the back?
17
00:00:37,904 --> 00:00:39,470
Do we have to stay for this?
18
00:00:39,505 --> 00:00:42,039
What's the etiquette here?
19
00:00:42,041 --> 00:00:44,542
[Cheering]
20
00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:46,544
Boy: Yeah!
21
00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:47,928
[Gasps]
22
00:00:47,964 --> 00:00:49,130
[Shrieks]
23
00:00:49,182 --> 00:00:50,381
[Grunts]
24
00:00:52,635 --> 00:00:54,051
Snot: Steve!
25
00:00:54,086 --> 00:00:55,853
Go on without me!
26
00:00:55,888 --> 00:00:58,939
No! Never leave a friend behind.
27
00:00:58,975 --> 00:01:01,525
[Cheering continues]
28
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:05,196
[Speaking Japanese]
29
00:01:07,967 --> 00:01:09,867
[Chirping]
30
00:01:09,902 --> 00:01:12,102
Both: Aw! Aw!
31
00:01:12,138 --> 00:01:13,370
[Splat]
32
00:01:13,406 --> 00:01:14,839
Mertz: Ha ha!
33
00:01:14,874 --> 00:01:17,324
34
00:01:17,376 --> 00:01:20,411
Good morning, U.S.A.
35
00:01:20,413 --> 00:01:23,964
I got a feelin' that
it's gonna be a wonderful day
36
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:27,001
The sun in the sky
has a smile on his face
37
00:01:27,053 --> 00:01:31,222
And he's shinin' a salute
to the American race
38
00:01:33,142 --> 00:01:36,510
Oh, boy, it's swell to say
39
00:01:36,562 --> 00:01:38,812
good... good morning, U.S.A.
40
00:01:38,848 --> 00:01:40,064
Aah!
41
00:01:41,567 --> 00:01:44,602
Good morning, U.S.A.
42
00:01:48,324 --> 00:01:50,107
Snot: Oh, man.
43
00:01:50,109 --> 00:01:53,327
Looks like the party really
took off after we left.
44
00:01:53,362 --> 00:01:55,012
Should we have stayed?
45
00:01:55,047 --> 00:01:57,114
I just wanted to go
to one awesome party.
46
00:01:57,149 --> 00:01:59,116
Throw your own party.
47
00:01:59,151 --> 00:02:00,451
E-excuse me?
48
00:02:00,486 --> 00:02:02,853
You're sick of not
having parties to go to?
49
00:02:02,889 --> 00:02:04,388
Throw your own.
50
00:02:04,423 --> 00:02:07,925
Sounds to me like you
boys deserve your moment
51
00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:09,460
of being cool.
52
00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:12,296
It's my party and
I'll cry if I want to
53
00:02:12,348 --> 00:02:13,931
That was weird.
54
00:02:13,966 --> 00:02:16,166
Gentlemen, that man at Bobby Freeze
55
00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,401
was on to something.
56
00:02:17,436 --> 00:02:19,303
And when a weird man approaches you,
57
00:02:19,338 --> 00:02:21,972
a young boy in public,
you do what he tells you.
58
00:02:22,008 --> 00:02:23,390
We're having a party.
59
00:02:23,442 --> 00:02:25,276
- Where?
- Right here.
60
00:02:25,311 --> 00:02:27,778
My parents are on vacation in Sarajevo.
61
00:02:27,813 --> 00:02:29,146
Every four years,
62
00:02:29,181 --> 00:02:31,048
they like to tour a former Olympic site
63
00:02:31,083 --> 00:02:32,816
so they can imagine
what the games were like
64
00:02:32,852 --> 00:02:34,985
and reflect on how the
Olympians' best days
65
00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:36,353
are long behind them.
66
00:02:36,389 --> 00:02:38,188
Snot: Great idea for a vacation.
67
00:02:38,224 --> 00:02:39,924
Barry: The Olympics create more problems
68
00:02:39,959 --> 00:02:41,258
than they fix for a city.
69
00:02:41,294 --> 00:02:42,760
And every year,
70
00:02:42,795 --> 00:02:44,061
they leave me a special allowance
71
00:02:44,096 --> 00:02:45,396
in case I decide to have some fun
72
00:02:45,431 --> 00:02:46,797
while they're away.
73
00:02:46,832 --> 00:02:47,998
I've never touched it.
74
00:02:48,034 --> 00:02:50,801
So we can spend $400
on an awesome party.
75
00:02:50,836 --> 00:02:53,003
And the popular kids won't be invited.
76
00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:56,073
It'll be for kids like
us... The dorks and nerds.
77
00:02:56,108 --> 00:02:58,375
And the kids who are both
stupid and unattractive.
78
00:02:58,411 --> 00:02:59,944
Aren't those dorks?
79
00:02:59,979 --> 00:03:02,146
No, dorks are often quite good-looking.
80
00:03:02,181 --> 00:03:05,849
We'll invite small head David,
uh, friendless Becky Fleming.
81
00:03:05,885 --> 00:03:07,751
Lolo Fuentes.
82
00:03:07,787 --> 00:03:11,922
Sexually curious homeschooled
girl Lolo Fuentes?
83
00:03:11,958 --> 00:03:14,058
Her parents don't let
her leave the house.
84
00:03:14,093 --> 00:03:15,859
Maybe she'd sneak out for this.
85
00:03:15,895 --> 00:03:18,295
'Cause this is gonna be
a party for all the kids
86
00:03:18,331 --> 00:03:20,097
who are never included.
87
00:03:20,132 --> 00:03:22,032
A party for the...
88
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:23,750
Snot and Steve: Unincludeds!
89
00:03:23,786 --> 00:03:25,936
The deaf kids!
90
00:03:28,352 --> 00:03:31,786
[John Williams' "Olympic
Fanfare and Theme" playing]
91
00:03:31,822 --> 00:03:33,788
Francine, come and
picture what it was like
92
00:03:33,824 --> 00:03:36,558
to watch the opening
ceremonies from here.
93
00:03:36,592 --> 00:03:39,693
Ever done it in an abandoned
eastern bloc sports arena?
94
00:03:39,729 --> 00:03:42,329
Mmm, that depends.
95
00:03:42,365 --> 00:03:45,299
Is Romania in the eastern bloc?
96
00:03:45,334 --> 00:03:47,568
And does it still count if the stadium
97
00:03:47,603 --> 00:03:51,405
was full of screaming spectators?
98
00:03:55,711 --> 00:03:58,612
What kind of food is
"Nouveau Fretalian"?
99
00:03:58,648 --> 00:04:00,614
Stick with me. I'm gonna nail my order.
100
00:04:00,650 --> 00:04:02,383
Hi. What can I get you?
101
00:04:02,418 --> 00:04:05,252
I guess I'll have the beet salad,
102
00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:07,755
and, um, the Risotto,
and a glass of red wine.
103
00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:09,323
Um, anything that's not too expensive.
104
00:04:09,358 --> 00:04:10,524
Great order.
105
00:04:10,559 --> 00:04:13,160
[Chuckling] Oh, please.
106
00:04:13,195 --> 00:04:15,362
I'll have the tuna
tartare with quail egg,
107
00:04:15,364 --> 00:04:18,415
the duck with pear mostarda,
and a glass of Prosecco.
108
00:04:18,451 --> 00:04:20,284
I'll put that in right away.
109
00:04:21,604 --> 00:04:24,672
How could she compliment
your order and not mine?
110
00:04:24,707 --> 00:04:25,873
Did she?
111
00:04:25,925 --> 00:04:27,374
Please, she practically dry-humped
112
00:04:27,376 --> 00:04:28,592
your turd of an order.
113
00:04:28,628 --> 00:04:30,177
Mine was inspired.
114
00:04:30,212 --> 00:04:31,679
She should've said "great order" to me!
115
00:04:31,714 --> 00:04:33,464
Maybe she sensed that you
were gonna make me pay.
116
00:04:33,516 --> 00:04:34,765
Of course you're paying for this.
117
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,216
Who do you think was paying for this?
118
00:04:36,268 --> 00:04:37,434
That I'd pay for this?
119
00:04:37,470 --> 00:04:38,886
After the way I've been treated?!
120
00:04:38,938 --> 00:04:42,856
[Club music playing,
indistinct conversations]
121
00:04:46,228 --> 00:04:48,228
Whoa, it's packed!
122
00:04:48,230 --> 00:04:50,280
[Doorbell rings]
123
00:04:50,316 --> 00:04:52,700
Yo, I heard you losers
are having a party.
124
00:04:52,735 --> 00:04:54,652
And I go to every party
125
00:04:54,704 --> 00:04:56,704
'cause I kinda have a drinking problem.
126
00:04:56,739 --> 00:04:59,340
Welcome. If you would
just stand on that "X,"
127
00:04:59,375 --> 00:05:01,709
someone will be along to take your coat.
128
00:05:01,744 --> 00:05:04,411
Mertz: Coat check! Nice touch.
129
00:05:05,581 --> 00:05:08,298
It's actually a little chilly.
130
00:05:08,334 --> 00:05:10,084
I might hang on to my coat.
131
00:05:10,136 --> 00:05:12,336
Hey, Mertz! How do you like your eggs?
132
00:05:12,388 --> 00:05:14,621
I like 'em hard-boiled in the Winter
133
00:05:14,657 --> 00:05:16,757
so I can put 'em in my pockets
134
00:05:16,792 --> 00:05:19,626
and keep my hands warm on my walk to...
135
00:05:19,662 --> 00:05:21,228
[Grunting]
136
00:05:21,263 --> 00:05:23,397
Aah!
137
00:05:24,517 --> 00:05:27,835
Guys, we've become what we despise.
138
00:05:28,871 --> 00:05:31,271
- Yay!
- All right!
139
00:05:31,273 --> 00:05:33,857
Our reign of cool starts now.
140
00:05:33,909 --> 00:05:37,411
[Electricity crackles]
141
00:05:37,446 --> 00:05:40,197
[Door whoos]
142
00:05:40,457 --> 00:05:42,105
- Whoa!
- Who are you?
143
00:05:42,201 --> 00:05:45,369
I'm you, Steve, from the year 2040.
144
00:05:45,421 --> 00:05:48,422
And I'm you, Snot, and
we're here to warn you.
145
00:05:48,424 --> 00:05:50,457
You can't go back to that party.
146
00:05:51,711 --> 00:05:53,460
If you're from the future,
147
00:05:53,462 --> 00:05:55,679
who wins the world series next year?
148
00:05:55,715 --> 00:05:57,264
Rene Russo.
149
00:05:57,299 --> 00:05:59,767
Buckle up, it's a crazy season.
150
00:06:01,403 --> 00:06:02,702
[Soft rock music playing]
151
00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:05,538
Future us? We're so polished.
152
00:06:05,574 --> 00:06:08,508
Steve, look at us!
We're still hanging out.
153
00:06:08,543 --> 00:06:10,043
Yeah, we're best friends,
154
00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:12,512
like Taylor Swift and Usain Bolt.
155
00:06:12,547 --> 00:06:14,447
Oh, you don't know about that yet.
156
00:06:14,482 --> 00:06:15,715
They become best friends,
157
00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:17,383
briefly overthrow the U.S. government,
158
00:06:17,419 --> 00:06:19,018
and are beheaded
together in Times Square.
159
00:06:19,054 --> 00:06:21,521
Steve, they don't want
a boring history lesson.
160
00:06:21,556 --> 00:06:22,989
What's important is
161
00:06:23,024 --> 00:06:25,992
we've been inseparable
for, like, 30 years.
162
00:06:26,027 --> 00:06:29,062
And together, we
invented the time machine.
163
00:06:30,432 --> 00:06:32,498
See, here's the secret to life...
164
00:06:32,534 --> 00:06:34,534
If you're an awkward outsider as a kid,
165
00:06:34,569 --> 00:06:37,704
you end up being a rich, cool,
and very successful adult.
166
00:06:37,739 --> 00:06:39,339
But a few days ago,
167
00:06:39,374 --> 00:06:40,907
we had a couple failures in the lab,
168
00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:42,475
and that was weird.
169
00:06:42,510 --> 00:06:44,677
And when I got a memory
of getting a blow job
170
00:06:44,713 --> 00:06:47,447
in high school, we knew
something was very wrong.
171
00:06:47,482 --> 00:06:48,982
[Sarcastically] Oh, no, that's so bad.
172
00:06:49,017 --> 00:06:51,417
We checked the security
footage from our lab
173
00:06:51,453 --> 00:06:54,487
and noticed that Mertz stole
one of our time machines.
174
00:06:54,522 --> 00:06:57,457
I bet Mertz was that
janitor in Bobby Freeze!
175
00:06:57,492 --> 00:06:59,359
He... he told us to have a party.
176
00:06:59,394 --> 00:07:02,228
Oh! He wants you to be cool now
177
00:07:02,264 --> 00:07:04,464
so in the future, you
aren't as successful.
178
00:07:04,499 --> 00:07:07,300
You guys can't go
back down to that party.
179
00:07:07,335 --> 00:07:08,411
What?
180
00:07:08,446 --> 00:07:11,271
You're asking us to give
up our chance to be popular
181
00:07:11,306 --> 00:07:13,673
and talk to all the girls
who are here to see us?
182
00:07:13,708 --> 00:07:15,808
It better be worth it for us later on.
183
00:07:15,844 --> 00:07:17,510
Oh, it is.
184
00:07:17,545 --> 00:07:20,413
I've had sex four times
with three different women.
185
00:07:20,448 --> 00:07:24,384
You hear that, Snot? Someone
came back for seconds.
186
00:07:24,419 --> 00:07:26,352
Snot?
187
00:07:26,388 --> 00:07:30,523
He went down to the party!
He's gonna ruin everything!
188
00:07:30,525 --> 00:07:33,409
Okay, go get him, but
don't talk to anyone.
189
00:07:33,445 --> 00:07:35,194
Don't do anything memorable.
190
00:07:35,247 --> 00:07:38,231
Just make your usual
zero impact on people.
191
00:07:38,266 --> 00:07:39,766
Your future depends on it.
192
00:07:40,919 --> 00:07:42,869
What happens to me and Toshi?
193
00:07:42,904 --> 00:07:45,471
Toshi stopped talking
to us after high school.
194
00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:47,807
[Speaks Japanese]
195
00:07:47,842 --> 00:07:49,842
And Barry, old friend,
196
00:07:49,878 --> 00:07:52,312
you died young in a
formula one accident.
197
00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,948
Did a wheel hop the
grandstand and take my head off
198
00:07:54,983 --> 00:07:57,650
because I was looking the
other way because of nachos?
199
00:07:57,686 --> 00:08:01,154
No, you were a super famous driver.
200
00:08:01,189 --> 00:08:02,422
Oh.
201
00:08:02,457 --> 00:08:05,258
In fact, during your final grand prix,
202
00:08:05,293 --> 00:08:07,260
you got blinded by the amount of tits
203
00:08:07,295 --> 00:08:08,761
being flashed in your face.
204
00:08:08,797 --> 00:08:10,763
But you kept your
foot on the gas, Barry.
205
00:08:10,799 --> 00:08:12,398
That was your way.
206
00:08:12,434 --> 00:08:15,234
No one had ever seen a
blind guy drive so straight.
207
00:08:15,270 --> 00:08:17,670
If only it had been a straight course.
208
00:08:20,325 --> 00:08:22,325
I don't wanna do this.
209
00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:24,277
Since when did that
ever affect what we do?
210
00:08:24,312 --> 00:08:25,645
- So, you know the plan?
- Yeah.
211
00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:27,313
We reverse our orders from the last time
212
00:08:27,349 --> 00:08:28,748
to see if she compliments your order.
213
00:08:28,783 --> 00:08:31,217
And if she doesn't,
we'll know it's personal.
214
00:08:31,252 --> 00:08:33,152
And if it's personal, you wanna guess
215
00:08:33,188 --> 00:08:34,921
which direction the
shit's going, Hayley?
216
00:08:34,956 --> 00:08:38,257
"A," down. "B," up.
"C," none of the above!
217
00:08:38,293 --> 00:08:39,525
Take the test, Hayley!
218
00:08:39,561 --> 00:08:41,264
- "A!"
- Which one was "A"?
219
00:08:41,300 --> 00:08:42,704
Down. That's right!
220
00:08:42,706 --> 00:08:45,231
- Good evening.
- Oh! Buenos noches.
221
00:08:45,266 --> 00:08:46,699
I think we're ready.
222
00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:48,735
I'll have the beet salad, Risotto,
223
00:08:48,770 --> 00:08:50,737
- and a glass of red wine.
- And for you?
224
00:08:50,772 --> 00:08:53,506
I'll have the quail egg, tuna tartare,
225
00:08:53,541 --> 00:08:56,476
the duck with pear mostarda,
226
00:08:56,511 --> 00:08:58,611
and a glass of, uh, prosecco.
227
00:08:58,646 --> 00:08:59,812
Ooh, great order.
228
00:08:59,848 --> 00:09:01,447
No, no, absolutely no!
229
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:03,333
Why did you tell her
she had a great order,
230
00:09:03,368 --> 00:09:05,535
- but not me?
- Did I? I'm sorry.
231
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:08,428
I have a date tonight.
I wasn't even thinking.
232
00:09:09,569 --> 00:09:11,999
You heard her. It's personal.
233
00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:13,796
That's not what she... It's personal!
234
00:09:13,848 --> 00:09:16,129
235
00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:19,265
[Indistinct conversations]
236
00:09:19,300 --> 00:09:21,684
Oh... zero impact.
237
00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,303
Don't even make a ripple.
238
00:09:24,305 --> 00:09:26,139
[Indistinct conversations]
239
00:09:26,543 --> 00:09:28,543
Klaus, have you seen Snot?
240
00:09:28,595 --> 00:09:30,211
Why would I be looking for Snot?
241
00:09:30,213 --> 00:09:32,096
This dude's hitting on me!
242
00:09:32,133 --> 00:09:34,883
- Boy: It's Steve!
- Boy: Steve, come hang out!
243
00:09:34,935 --> 00:09:36,218
Don't even make eye contact.
244
00:09:36,270 --> 00:09:37,686
[Doorbell rings]
245
00:09:38,889 --> 00:09:42,941
246
00:09:42,977 --> 00:09:44,943
Lolo Fuentes.
247
00:09:44,979 --> 00:09:46,862
Lolo Fuentes.
248
00:09:46,897 --> 00:09:48,230
It's Lolo Fuentes.
249
00:09:48,232 --> 00:09:49,898
That's Lolo Fuentes.
250
00:09:49,900 --> 00:09:51,900
Lolo Fuentes is here.
251
00:09:51,952 --> 00:09:54,236
Lolo Fuentes.
252
00:10:03,781 --> 00:10:05,214
Steve Smith?
253
00:10:05,249 --> 00:10:06,882
Um...
254
00:10:06,917 --> 00:10:08,250
I'm Lolo Fuentes.
255
00:10:08,285 --> 00:10:10,018
I've been homeschooled my entire life,
256
00:10:10,054 --> 00:10:12,521
and I've never socialized
with peers before tonight.
257
00:10:12,556 --> 00:10:13,722
Thank you for including me.
258
00:10:13,757 --> 00:10:17,659
Uhh...
259
00:10:17,695 --> 00:10:18,994
I've never talked to a boy before,
260
00:10:19,029 --> 00:10:21,063
but even I can tell you're being smooth.
261
00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:22,831
[Chuckles] And I can't lie.
262
00:10:22,867 --> 00:10:24,800
I'm... I'm feeling some new feelings.
263
00:10:24,835 --> 00:10:27,169
May... may I hug you?
264
00:10:27,204 --> 00:10:28,871
Zero impact.
265
00:10:28,906 --> 00:10:30,772
You know just what to say.
266
00:10:30,808 --> 00:10:31,974
Mm...
267
00:10:32,009 --> 00:10:34,159
- Sia:
I'm
- Both: Mm!
268
00:10:34,195 --> 00:10:36,862
-
Gonna swing
- Boy: Whoa!
269
00:10:36,914 --> 00:10:38,914
-
From the chandelier
- Boy: Check out Steve-O!
270
00:10:38,949 --> 00:10:40,199
- Girl: Steve's the man!
- [Both moaning]
271
00:10:40,251 --> 00:10:41,867
Boy: Nice work, camera guy.
272
00:10:41,919 --> 00:10:43,619
Thanks, man.
273
00:10:43,621 --> 00:10:45,621
No one's more unincluded
thank the camera guy.
274
00:10:45,623 --> 00:10:50,259
Gonna live like
tomorrow doesn't exist
275
00:10:50,294 --> 00:10:53,045
-
Like it doesn't exist
- [Moaning continues]
276
00:10:53,097 --> 00:10:55,797
Steve, when you grow up
and your life's awesome,
277
00:10:55,850 --> 00:10:58,467
you're gonna look back
on this moment, bro.
278
00:10:58,502 --> 00:11:01,737
This is the moment
that changed everything.
279
00:11:01,772 --> 00:11:04,806
Feel my tears as they dry
280
00:11:04,808 --> 00:11:07,693
-
I'm...
- Snot: Steve!
281
00:11:07,728 --> 00:11:09,528
Hey, where am I?
282
00:11:09,563 --> 00:11:11,880
A second ago I was
blasting my abs at the gym
283
00:11:11,916 --> 00:11:15,450
where I train for free
because I'm assistant manager.
284
00:11:15,486 --> 00:11:17,953
Whoa! I'm so ripped now.
285
00:11:17,988 --> 00:11:19,655
How many girls have you had sex with?
286
00:11:19,707 --> 00:11:21,907
How many girls haven't I had sex with?
287
00:11:21,959 --> 00:11:23,125
Zero.
288
00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:24,793
I'm awesome!
289
00:11:24,828 --> 00:11:26,995
I'm not awesome! Look at me.
290
00:11:26,997 --> 00:11:29,464
Am I under a roof?
291
00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:31,133
Sheets!
292
00:11:33,137 --> 00:11:35,537
Steve, what did you do?
293
00:11:35,573 --> 00:11:37,606
I went downstairs to look for you!
294
00:11:37,641 --> 00:11:41,109
I was in the bathroom.
I'd never go downstairs.
295
00:11:41,145 --> 00:11:43,612
I love my future self.
296
00:11:43,647 --> 00:11:45,681
The clean one. Sorry, dude.
297
00:11:45,733 --> 00:11:48,817
Look, I'm the one who
gave up. It's my bad.
298
00:11:48,852 --> 00:11:52,187
I... I didn't do anything cool, I swear.
299
00:11:52,222 --> 00:11:54,122
You must've done something
cool in the bathroom.
300
00:11:54,158 --> 00:11:55,657
I assure you,
301
00:11:55,693 --> 00:11:57,826
what I did in the bathroom was not cool.
302
00:11:57,861 --> 00:11:59,695
Steve, come downstairs
303
00:11:59,747 --> 00:12:01,863
so we can keep making
out and breaking things.
304
00:12:01,916 --> 00:12:03,415
[Gasps]
305
00:12:03,450 --> 00:12:04,967
Lolo, bunny, give us a second.
306
00:12:06,472 --> 00:12:08,438
How could you do this to us?!
307
00:12:08,474 --> 00:12:11,408
I couldn't help myself!
It's Lolo Fuentes!
308
00:12:11,443 --> 00:12:13,844
Look, all we have to
do is go back in time
309
00:12:13,879 --> 00:12:15,178
and undo what I just did.
310
00:12:15,214 --> 00:12:16,813
How are you gonna do that?
311
00:12:16,849 --> 00:12:18,348
With your time machine.
312
00:12:18,384 --> 00:12:21,451
Whoa, oh oh! I have a time machine?
313
00:12:21,487 --> 00:12:22,886
It's gone!
314
00:12:24,390 --> 00:12:26,056
Whoa, oh, oh, oh!
315
00:12:26,091 --> 00:12:28,025
I don't have a time machine.
316
00:12:28,060 --> 00:12:30,060
Time for a 1-minute plank.
317
00:12:30,095 --> 00:12:32,362
1 banana, 2 banana,
318
00:12:32,398 --> 00:12:33,964
3 banana...
319
00:12:35,694 --> 00:12:36,326
[Indistinct conversations]
320
00:12:36,362 --> 00:12:39,569
Steve! You ruined my future!
321
00:12:39,594 --> 00:12:41,365
Not necesarily.
322
00:12:41,367 --> 00:12:44,034
Maybe you're a bum by choice, you know?
323
00:12:44,036 --> 00:12:45,702
Get out of the rat race.
324
00:12:45,754 --> 00:12:48,422
Oh, no, no, no. I'm not
doing a rat race again.
325
00:12:48,528 --> 00:12:51,551
They're fixed. The rats
know all the shortcuts.
326
00:12:51,710 --> 00:12:53,293
My rain boots.
327
00:12:53,345 --> 00:12:56,713
Look, Snot, our futures
clearly aren't set in stone.
328
00:12:56,715 --> 00:12:59,283
Let's just go downstairs so
you can do something cool.
329
00:12:59,318 --> 00:13:02,102
Then your future will be
awesome just like mine.
330
00:13:02,137 --> 00:13:04,271
I guess it's worth a shot.
331
00:13:04,306 --> 00:13:07,057
Barry, who's training you these days?
332
00:13:11,363 --> 00:13:13,113
[Music playing,
indistinct conversations]
333
00:13:13,148 --> 00:13:15,732
- Steve's back!
- Whoo, yeah!
334
00:13:15,784 --> 00:13:18,785
If I'm cool here, you
can be cool here, too.
335
00:13:18,821 --> 00:13:22,322
There's Becky standing all alone.
336
00:13:22,374 --> 00:13:25,626
- Go bring her a drink.
- Okay.
337
00:13:25,661 --> 00:13:27,077
338
00:13:27,129 --> 00:13:28,745
Hey, Becky.
339
00:13:28,747 --> 00:13:32,883
In this sea of losers,
you're the real standout.
340
00:13:32,918 --> 00:13:35,252
We may be unincluded,
341
00:13:35,254 --> 00:13:37,754
but I'm including you
342
00:13:37,806 --> 00:13:41,091
in my masturbation fantasies later.
343
00:13:42,261 --> 00:13:43,894
Soda?!
344
00:13:43,929 --> 00:13:46,730
- [All gasp]
- My shirt is ruined!
345
00:13:46,765 --> 00:13:48,732
This is the first
party I've ever been to,
346
00:13:48,767 --> 00:13:50,817
and it's ruined!
347
00:13:50,853 --> 00:13:53,854
Wah! [Grunting loudly]
348
00:13:53,906 --> 00:13:55,572
[Crying and grunting]
349
00:13:55,608 --> 00:13:56,990
- Whoa.
- Maybe there's a reason
350
00:13:57,026 --> 00:13:59,076
some of these people
don't get invited to stuff.
351
00:13:59,111 --> 00:14:02,195
I blew it. I'm never
talking to a girl again.
352
00:14:02,247 --> 00:14:04,114
No way. That took guts.
353
00:14:04,116 --> 00:14:07,117
Let's go upstairs and meet the
new and improved future you.
354
00:14:07,169 --> 00:14:09,036
Hey, Steve.
355
00:14:10,706 --> 00:14:15,542
[Both moaning]
356
00:14:15,544 --> 00:14:17,010
Snot, I gotta tell you,
357
00:14:17,046 --> 00:14:19,262
she's a hell of a lot
better at this than you are.
358
00:14:21,216 --> 00:14:24,184
Hey! Future me is even bigger.
359
00:14:24,219 --> 00:14:26,637
And he got a sweet
new deep V-neck hoodie.
360
00:14:26,639 --> 00:14:27,888
'Sup?
361
00:14:27,940 --> 00:14:29,523
Where's future me?
362
00:14:29,558 --> 00:14:31,558
Someone peed in there.
363
00:14:31,610 --> 00:14:33,860
How did I become a convict?
364
00:14:33,896 --> 00:14:37,481
Long time ago, I spilled a
drink on this girl, Becky,
365
00:14:37,533 --> 00:14:39,232
and she screamed at me.
366
00:14:39,284 --> 00:14:41,818
I vowed never to speak to a woman again.
367
00:14:41,870 --> 00:14:43,537
And I never did...
368
00:14:43,572 --> 00:14:46,156
Not even the ones I ate.
369
00:14:46,158 --> 00:14:47,658
Steve!
370
00:14:47,710 --> 00:14:49,159
Don't even worry about it.
371
00:14:49,211 --> 00:14:51,545
Sounds like all you have
to do is talk to a girl
372
00:14:51,580 --> 00:14:54,247
in the near 20 years and
this guy? Poof, he's gone.
373
00:14:54,299 --> 00:14:56,583
- You're right. Let's do it now.
- [Girls giggling]
374
00:14:56,635 --> 00:14:59,052
Do I hear girls downstairs?
375
00:14:59,088 --> 00:15:03,006
And if so, does your
basement have, like,
376
00:15:03,008 --> 00:15:05,809
one of those drains in the floor?
377
00:15:08,097 --> 00:15:10,647
[Indistinct conversations]
378
00:15:10,683 --> 00:15:12,516
There's some girls. Talk to 'em.
379
00:15:12,518 --> 00:15:13,767
380
00:15:13,819 --> 00:15:14,985
Hi.
381
00:15:15,020 --> 00:15:16,486
We're smokers.
382
00:15:16,522 --> 00:15:18,155
If you wanna talk to
us, you gotta smoke.
383
00:15:18,190 --> 00:15:20,190
[Inhales]
384
00:15:20,242 --> 00:15:23,527
[Coughing loudly]
385
00:15:23,529 --> 00:15:25,996
Okay, you talked to a girl.
386
00:15:26,031 --> 00:15:29,916
Oh, my god! I had a tracheotomy!
387
00:15:29,952 --> 00:15:31,835
[Hoarse voice] Actually,
388
00:15:31,870 --> 00:15:35,505
my master said I needed a new sex hole.
389
00:15:37,209 --> 00:15:39,042
This is hopeless!
390
00:15:39,044 --> 00:15:42,045
No matter what we do,
future me is doomed.
391
00:15:42,097 --> 00:15:43,880
Wait a minute.
392
00:15:43,882 --> 00:15:45,849
We've been trying to make you look cool,
393
00:15:45,884 --> 00:15:47,768
when everybody here is a nerd.
394
00:15:47,803 --> 00:15:49,720
We need to play to our audience.
395
00:15:49,772 --> 00:15:51,688
Have you been practicing your magic?
396
00:15:51,724 --> 00:15:53,607
Magic doesn't exist.
397
00:15:53,642 --> 00:15:55,976
But illusions are real!
398
00:15:56,028 --> 00:15:57,644
If you'd given me a heads up,
399
00:15:57,696 --> 00:15:59,396
I'd be holding flowers right now.
400
00:15:59,398 --> 00:16:02,566
401
00:16:02,568 --> 00:16:04,735
My card's not in the deck.
402
00:16:04,787 --> 00:16:06,779
Oh, man, are you sure?
403
00:16:06,842 --> 00:16:08,842
I know the card I picked.
404
00:16:09,992 --> 00:16:12,576
Would you mind cutting open that orange?
405
00:16:15,214 --> 00:16:16,580
[Cheering]
406
00:16:16,582 --> 00:16:17,964
That's an amazing trick. Let's go.
407
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,666
Did that work?
408
00:16:19,718 --> 00:16:22,085
[Shrieking]
409
00:16:22,087 --> 00:16:23,503
[Both scream]
410
00:16:23,555 --> 00:16:24,921
[Continues shrieking]
411
00:16:29,728 --> 00:16:32,846
Lady, you are about to deeply regret
412
00:16:32,898 --> 00:16:37,150
not telling me you liked my order.
Sounds trivial when I say it out loud
413
00:16:37,186 --> 00:16:38,769
But I know in my heart, it's not.
414
00:16:39,988 --> 00:16:41,688
Need a job now.
415
00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:44,441
This is an outstanding r?sum?.
416
00:16:44,443 --> 00:16:45,826
You start Monday.
417
00:16:45,861 --> 00:16:47,861
No, I'm-a start right now.
418
00:16:47,913 --> 00:16:50,781
- [Groaning]
- [Thud]
419
00:16:52,701 --> 00:16:55,619
Why didn't I open with that?
I knew I was gonna do it.
420
00:16:55,671 --> 00:16:56,953
Good evening, may I...
421
00:16:56,955 --> 00:16:58,455
- Take your order?
- [Crashing]
422
00:16:58,457 --> 00:17:00,090
I'll have the ricotta and egg raviolo
423
00:17:00,125 --> 00:17:01,625
and the filet of sole.
424
00:17:01,627 --> 00:17:03,376
That is a great order.
425
00:17:03,428 --> 00:17:05,629
A great order. And you?
426
00:17:05,631 --> 00:17:08,048
Tough order to follow. Bed
shitting potential is high.
427
00:17:08,100 --> 00:17:09,466
I'll have the same.
428
00:17:13,639 --> 00:17:15,639
[Indistinct conversations]
429
00:17:15,641 --> 00:17:17,891
What is happening?!
430
00:17:17,943 --> 00:17:19,559
How did I get this way?
431
00:17:19,611 --> 00:17:22,946
[Shrieking]
432
00:17:22,981 --> 00:17:25,365
I can't even explain it to us!
433
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:27,317
Snot, relax.
434
00:17:27,319 --> 00:17:29,035
No matter what happens
to you in the future,
435
00:17:29,071 --> 00:17:30,904
at least we'll always be friends.
436
00:17:30,956 --> 00:17:32,956
Yeah, right. Friends with a half turtle
437
00:17:32,991 --> 00:17:34,791
when there's full turtles
to be friends with?
438
00:17:34,827 --> 00:17:38,378
Steve, we haven't been friends
in any of these futures.
439
00:17:38,413 --> 00:17:40,831
You're right.
440
00:17:40,833 --> 00:17:42,465
That's it!
441
00:17:42,992 --> 00:17:45,459
It's our friendship that
makes us so successful.
442
00:17:45,494 --> 00:17:48,212
What we've got to do is
guarantee that we'll be friends
443
00:17:48,247 --> 00:17:50,914
- no matter what the future holds.
- How?
444
00:17:50,966 --> 00:17:53,300
We gotta be outcasts again, both of us.
445
00:17:53,336 --> 00:17:56,136
Unincluded from even the unincludeds.
446
00:17:56,172 --> 00:17:57,838
Sorry, ripped future me.
447
00:17:57,890 --> 00:17:59,807
Even though you're super awesome,
448
00:17:59,842 --> 00:18:02,142
I gotta do this for my best friend.
449
00:18:04,620 --> 00:18:07,204
I guess I'm saying goodbye to these.
450
00:18:07,850 --> 00:18:09,316
No matter what your future,
451
00:18:09,352 --> 00:18:11,769
you can still commit yourself
to regular exercise...
452
00:18:11,821 --> 00:18:13,103
I said goodbye.
453
00:18:13,155 --> 00:18:14,738
I'm scared.
454
00:18:14,774 --> 00:18:16,073
Don't be scared of them.
455
00:18:16,623 --> 00:18:18,006
Be scared of them.
456
00:18:19,278 --> 00:18:21,245
Let's do this.
457
00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:22,946
Wham:
Jitterbug
458
00:18:22,998 --> 00:18:24,915
459
00:18:24,950 --> 00:18:26,917
Jitterbug
460
00:18:26,952 --> 00:18:28,502
- [all gasp]
-
Jitterbug
461
00:18:28,537 --> 00:18:31,004
guys, you've been having a good night.
462
00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:33,374
Not sure this is a smart move
for you, bros.
463
00:18:33,376 --> 00:18:36,126
You put the boom boom into my heart
464
00:18:36,178 --> 00:18:38,379
You send my soul sky high
when your lovin' starts
465
00:18:38,381 --> 00:18:40,097
It's working! Let's take it home.
466
00:18:40,132 --> 00:18:41,932
-
Jitterbug into my brain
-
yeah, yeah
467
00:18:41,967 --> 00:18:45,135
goes a bang-bang-bang
till my feet do the same
468
00:18:45,187 --> 00:18:48,055
But something's bugging me,
something ain't right
469
00:18:48,107 --> 00:18:51,024
My best friend told me
what you did last night
470
00:18:51,060 --> 00:18:52,776
This is horrible.
471
00:18:52,812 --> 00:18:55,062
Hold on. This has potential.
472
00:18:55,064 --> 00:18:57,781
But I should've been
with you instead
473
00:18:57,817 --> 00:19:00,284
Wake me up before you go-go
474
00:19:00,319 --> 00:19:03,153
Don't leave me hanging on
like a yo-yo
475
00:19:03,205 --> 00:19:05,956
Wake me up before you go-go
476
00:19:05,991 --> 00:19:08,041
Yeah, okay. Yeah.
477
00:19:08,077 --> 00:19:09,710
Yeah, it's awesome!
478
00:19:09,745 --> 00:19:11,712
Sorry I doubted you, bros!
479
00:19:11,747 --> 00:19:13,414
Oh, no.
480
00:19:13,416 --> 00:19:15,132
...on going solo
481
00:19:15,167 --> 00:19:17,801
Hey, who wants to Eiffel
Tower this turtle with me?
482
00:19:17,837 --> 00:19:19,093
What do we do?
483
00:19:19,601 --> 00:19:21,505
We gotta take it to the next level.
484
00:19:21,507 --> 00:19:23,140
Look here.
485
00:19:23,142 --> 00:19:27,261
Both: 1... 2... 3...
486
00:19:27,263 --> 00:19:27,928
Hey
487
00:19:28,264 --> 00:19:29,596
where'd you get that body from
488
00:19:29,598 --> 00:19:31,565
Where'd you get that body from
489
00:19:33,068 --> 00:19:34,935
I got it from my daddy
490
00:19:34,937 --> 00:19:36,603
I got it from my daddy
491
00:19:36,605 --> 00:19:37,738
I got, got it
492
00:19:37,740 --> 00:19:40,240
hey, where'd you get that body from
493
00:19:40,242 --> 00:19:42,109
I got it from my daddy
494
00:19:42,111 --> 00:19:43,911
I got it from my daddy
495
00:19:43,913 --> 00:19:47,392
-
I got, got it
-
hey, where'd you get that body from
496
00:19:47,666 --> 00:19:50,501
I got it from my da-da-da-da-da
497
00:19:50,503 --> 00:19:52,286
Da-da-da-da
498
00:19:52,288 --> 00:19:54,838
da-da-da-da-da daddy
499
00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:57,841
I got it from my da-da-da-da-da
500
00:19:57,843 --> 00:19:58,959
Da-da-da-da-da this is weird.
501
00:19:58,961 --> 00:20:00,906
I'm going home to spend the rest
of high school
502
00:20:00,908 --> 00:20:02,379
with my father.
503
00:20:02,381 --> 00:20:04,181
[Instinct grumbling]
504
00:20:04,183 --> 00:20:06,099
...started out really good,
but it sucks now.
505
00:20:06,101 --> 00:20:07,634
506
00:20:07,686 --> 00:20:08,886
Saying, it's gonna be all right
507
00:20:08,938 --> 00:20:11,472
'Cause the players gonna play,
play, play, play, play
508
00:20:13,142 --> 00:20:15,108
Start the car!
509
00:20:15,144 --> 00:20:16,810
- Drive, drive!
- [Tires screech]
510
00:20:16,862 --> 00:20:19,379
- Roger, what happened in there?
- We did it!
511
00:20:19,431 --> 00:20:21,815
Same as him? Same as him, my ass!
512
00:20:21,867 --> 00:20:23,200
That's a bitch move!
513
00:20:23,235 --> 00:20:25,068
You knew exactly the
game we were playing!
514
00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:28,322
[Sobbing]
515
00:20:28,374 --> 00:20:33,043
[Electricity hums, glass shatters]
516
00:20:35,915 --> 00:20:38,048
Thank god we're back.
517
00:20:38,083 --> 00:20:40,217
And everything's the same.
518
00:20:40,252 --> 00:20:43,086
[Electricity hums]
519
00:20:43,138 --> 00:20:45,138
Did one of you guys just break a beaker?
520
00:20:45,174 --> 00:20:47,007
Why? Does it change the future?
521
00:20:47,009 --> 00:20:48,926
No, but be careful!
522
00:20:48,978 --> 00:20:52,062
[Electricity hums]
523
00:20:52,097 --> 00:20:54,681
Stop yelling at the kids!
524
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