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1
00:00:18,496 --> 00:00:21,064
♪ Baby Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
2
00:00:21,107 --> 00:00:23,109
♪ Baby Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
3
00:00:23,153 --> 00:00:25,720
♪ Baby Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo, Baby Shark ♪
4
00:00:33,859 --> 00:00:35,643
♪ Mommy Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
5
00:00:35,687 --> 00:00:37,689
♪ Mommy Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
6
00:00:37,732 --> 00:00:41,562
♪ Mommy Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo, Mommy Shark ♪
7
00:00:41,606 --> 00:00:43,521
♪ Daddy Shark... ♪
8
00:00:53,226 --> 00:00:54,793
- Good morning, you two.
- Hi.
9
00:00:54,836 --> 00:00:56,621
Oh, I'm sorry, did
I wake the baby?
10
00:00:56,664 --> 00:00:58,753
Don't appreciate
you calling me that.
11
00:00:58,797 --> 00:01:00,103
No.
12
00:01:00,146 --> 00:01:01,539
John's been up forever.
13
00:01:01,582 --> 00:01:03,193
Just like me.
14
00:01:03,236 --> 00:01:04,889
Why won't he nap?
15
00:01:04,933 --> 00:01:07,588
I would strangle everyone
in this room for a nap.
16
00:01:07,632 --> 00:01:09,721
Yes, well...
17
00:01:09,764 --> 00:01:11,288
cherish these times.
18
00:01:11,331 --> 00:01:13,768
They disappear with
a cruel swiftness.
19
00:01:13,812 --> 00:01:15,640
Mark my words.
20
00:01:15,683 --> 00:01:18,164
You will blink and find
yourself yearning for the days
21
00:01:18,207 --> 00:01:20,645
when you could simply rock
your sweet child to sleep
22
00:01:20,688 --> 00:01:22,081
in your arms.
23
00:01:25,998 --> 00:01:27,739
That was incredible.
24
00:01:27,782 --> 00:01:29,523
Mm, seemed a little
cliché to me.
25
00:01:29,567 --> 00:01:32,483
No, I think your dad's
voice put John to sleep.
26
00:01:32,526 --> 00:01:34,311
Look at him.
27
00:01:34,354 --> 00:01:36,487
It's like he's
been chloroformed.
28
00:01:40,926 --> 00:01:42,101
You okay?
29
00:01:42,145 --> 00:01:43,494
Well...
30
00:01:43,537 --> 00:01:45,322
my back's killing me, my...
31
00:01:45,365 --> 00:01:47,150
knees have locked up and...
32
00:01:47,193 --> 00:01:49,195
I know there is a diaper
in there somewhere,
33
00:01:49,239 --> 00:01:51,284
but for the love of
God, I can't find it.
34
00:01:52,284 --> 00:01:54,287
You know, I have made
accommodation for you
35
00:01:54,331 --> 00:01:56,594
in the very large
apartment across the hall.
36
00:01:56,637 --> 00:01:58,596
Your room there
has a Savoir bed,
37
00:01:58,639 --> 00:02:01,468
plumped with wool
from Khangai yaks,
38
00:02:01,512 --> 00:02:04,036
which is so soft that
Mongolian herdsmen
39
00:02:04,079 --> 00:02:07,300
can't ride them bareback
without slipping off asleep.
40
00:02:07,344 --> 00:02:09,171
I know, but...
41
00:02:09,215 --> 00:02:10,956
Eve lost her boyfriend.
She's alone with John.
42
00:02:10,956 --> 00:02:13,611
How's she gonna feel if I
just suddenly leave, too?
43
00:02:13,654 --> 00:02:15,395
You're a good friend.
44
00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:17,223
I'm not looking for
a pat on the back.
45
00:02:17,267 --> 00:02:19,834
Oh, no, you've got a
burp pad stuck to it.
46
00:02:21,271 --> 00:02:23,273
Thank you for
the coffee, Dr. Crane.
47
00:02:23,316 --> 00:02:25,144
Oh, of course. Here.
48
00:02:26,101 --> 00:02:27,625
Can I ask you...
49
00:02:27,668 --> 00:02:29,468
do you know why Freddy
won't move in with you?
50
00:02:29,496 --> 00:02:30,932
You mean you wouldn't
mind if he did?
51
00:02:30,932 --> 00:02:32,282
No.
52
00:02:32,324 --> 00:02:33,848
I mean...
53
00:02:33,892 --> 00:02:35,763
don't get me wrong, I
love the guy, but...
54
00:02:35,807 --> 00:02:37,591
he snores like a paint mixer
55
00:02:37,634 --> 00:02:39,376
and spends more
time getting ready
56
00:02:39,419 --> 00:02:41,247
in the bathroom
than a runway model.
57
00:02:41,291 --> 00:02:43,641
Does he
know you feel this way?
58
00:02:43,684 --> 00:02:44,990
Of course not.
59
00:02:45,033 --> 00:02:46,687
Everything he's done for us?
60
00:02:46,731 --> 00:02:49,473
I'm not gonna tell him that
the way he slurps coffee
61
00:02:49,516 --> 00:02:52,171
makes me want to throw
him out a window.
62
00:02:56,175 --> 00:02:58,003
Oh, thanks, Dad.
63
00:02:58,046 --> 00:02:59,439
You're welcome.
64
00:02:59,483 --> 00:03:01,659
You know...
65
00:03:01,702 --> 00:03:03,356
it seems that out of
a laudable concern
66
00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:04,836
for one another's
feelings, you two are not
67
00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:06,011
being honest about
what you'd like.
68
00:03:06,011 --> 00:03:07,491
What?
69
00:03:07,534 --> 00:03:09,623
- I am.
- Well, yeah, me, too.
70
00:03:10,929 --> 00:03:12,670
You'd both prefer it if
Freddy lived with me.
71
00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:15,063
- I wouldn't.
- Yeah, me, neither.
72
00:03:17,327 --> 00:03:19,242
You spend too much
time in the bathroom,
73
00:03:19,285 --> 00:03:21,244
and his slurping makes
you want to kill him.
74
00:03:21,287 --> 00:03:23,246
- I've never heard him slurp.
- Yeah.
75
00:03:23,289 --> 00:03:26,249
I'm in and out of that
bathroom in like 55 minutes.
76
00:03:27,685 --> 00:03:29,687
Dear God. Some people
will not be helped.
77
00:03:29,730 --> 00:03:31,776
I could put the two of you on
a boat with life preservers
78
00:03:31,776 --> 00:03:34,344
on top of a sand dune, you'd
still find a way to drown.
79
00:03:34,387 --> 00:03:36,520
♪ Daddy Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
80
00:03:36,563 --> 00:03:38,957
♪ Daddy Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
81
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,872
♪ Daddy Shark, doo-doo,
doo-doo, doo-doo ♪
82
00:03:40,915 --> 00:03:42,265
- ♪ Daddy Shark ♪
- [slurping]
83
00:03:42,308 --> 00:03:44,005
♪ Grandma Shark, doo-doo... ♪
84
00:03:44,049 --> 00:03:45,964
- Maybe I should get my dad.
- I'll help you pack.
85
00:03:45,964 --> 00:03:47,804
♪ Doo-doo, doo-doo,
doo-doo, Grandma Shark... ♪
86
00:03:52,622 --> 00:03:54,059
Thanks
for helping, David.
87
00:03:54,059 --> 00:03:55,626
Oh, no problem.
88
00:03:55,669 --> 00:03:57,323
You and Uncle Frasier are
gonna have so much fun
89
00:03:57,323 --> 00:03:58,933
- living together.
- We'll see how it goes.
90
00:03:58,933 --> 00:04:00,805
We haven't always gotten
along in the past.
91
00:04:00,848 --> 00:04:02,894
Plus, moving in
with your dad at 33
92
00:04:02,937 --> 00:04:04,504
is not exactly
catnip for ladies.
93
00:04:04,548 --> 00:04:06,463
There's catnip for ladies?
94
00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:11,337
I think I got this.
95
00:04:11,381 --> 00:04:12,860
Why don't you run down
to the storage room
96
00:04:12,860 --> 00:04:15,341
and grab my box
of, uh... pencils.
97
00:04:15,385 --> 00:04:16,864
On it.
98
00:04:20,127 --> 00:04:22,261
- So, you...
- I'll get the lead out.
99
00:04:23,610 --> 00:04:25,482
Of storage.
100
00:04:28,398 --> 00:04:29,616
So, you...
101
00:04:29,660 --> 00:04:31,575
Actually, they're
made of graphite.
102
00:04:33,881 --> 00:04:34,926
So...
103
00:04:39,147 --> 00:04:40,584
You work with firefighters...
104
00:04:40,627 --> 00:04:43,021
men who can sprint
down a staircase
105
00:04:43,064 --> 00:04:45,240
carrying another person
over their shoulders,
106
00:04:45,284 --> 00:04:46,938
and rather than ask
them to help you move,
107
00:04:46,981 --> 00:04:50,375
you ask your cousin, David,
108
00:04:50,420 --> 00:04:51,856
whose greatest
athletic achievement
109
00:04:51,899 --> 00:04:54,162
is almostcrawling
into a hammock.
110
00:04:56,164 --> 00:04:57,644
You've been enjoying
your Savoir bed?
111
00:04:57,688 --> 00:04:59,298
The, uh, yak mattress?
112
00:04:59,342 --> 00:05:00,908
Surprisingly soft.
113
00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:03,607
Trust me, once you go
yak, you never go back.
114
00:05:05,260 --> 00:05:08,351
You know what, I am so
excited about living together.
115
00:05:08,394 --> 00:05:12,224
What do you say we have a
toast to this new cohabitation?
116
00:05:12,267 --> 00:05:14,835
- Oh, sure. I got some Scotch, if that sounds good.
- Ooh. Great.
117
00:05:14,879 --> 00:05:16,010
- I'll go get it.
- Top shelf.
118
00:05:16,010 --> 00:05:17,664
Of course. Nothing less.
119
00:05:17,708 --> 00:05:19,057
No, it's on the top
shelf of the hutch.
120
00:05:19,057 --> 00:05:20,145
Green plastic jug.
121
00:05:28,719 --> 00:05:30,198
Dr. Crane!
122
00:05:30,242 --> 00:05:31,635
Ah,
123
00:05:31,678 --> 00:05:33,332
I'm so glad I caught you.
124
00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:34,725
What was that thing you said
125
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,988
about how fast
the baby years go?
126
00:05:37,031 --> 00:05:38,555
It was really beautiful.
127
00:05:38,598 --> 00:05:40,992
Oh, I'm not sure I said
anything all that poetic.
128
00:05:41,035 --> 00:05:45,170
Just a small lyrical reverie
about how all parents yearn
129
00:05:45,213 --> 00:05:46,867
for that precious,
fleeting season
130
00:05:46,911 --> 00:05:49,566
when they could drive away
their child's woes with...
131
00:05:49,609 --> 00:05:51,002
soothing voice
132
00:05:51,045 --> 00:05:53,134
and a lullaby.
133
00:05:58,183 --> 00:05:59,402
- You're magic.
- Hmm?
134
00:06:04,537 --> 00:06:08,019
And another young woman
falls under your spell.
135
00:06:13,546 --> 00:06:16,941
Damn it, Frasier, you
know how magnetic you are.
136
00:06:18,943 --> 00:06:21,075
Ah. Freddy.
137
00:06:21,119 --> 00:06:23,687
I would like your help picking
out a dining room table.
138
00:06:23,730 --> 00:06:26,777
Now, I have found one that
I love with the davenport
139
00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:30,128
and another that I absolutely
adore with the divan.
140
00:06:30,171 --> 00:06:32,826
It's a real sofa's choice.
141
00:06:35,786 --> 00:06:37,178
And-and-and that is...?
142
00:06:37,222 --> 00:06:39,398
Weight bench.
143
00:06:39,442 --> 00:06:40,921
And you're putting it here?
144
00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:42,488
Seems like a pretty good spot.
145
00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,316
Doesn't it make you
just a-a bit nervous,
146
00:06:44,359 --> 00:06:47,362
putting a 100-pound dumbbell
near a world-class Steinway?
147
00:06:47,406 --> 00:06:49,495
I will stay away from the piano.
148
00:06:53,543 --> 00:06:54,544
Okay.
149
00:06:54,587 --> 00:06:56,023
I'll put this in my bedroom.
150
00:06:56,067 --> 00:06:57,111
Oh, dear.
151
00:06:59,287 --> 00:07:01,072
What, you don't
like the beer sign?
152
00:07:01,115 --> 00:07:03,422
No, it's-it's very fun.
153
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:06,033
Um, just trying to think
of the best spot for it.
154
00:07:06,077 --> 00:07:08,514
Um...
155
00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:10,951
Do you know what goes
perfectly with this sign?
156
00:07:10,995 --> 00:07:12,213
What?
157
00:07:12,257 --> 00:07:14,781
Your weight bench.
158
00:07:16,435 --> 00:07:17,567
Can't split up these
two kissing cousins.
159
00:07:17,567 --> 00:07:18,727
They're meant for each other.
160
00:07:19,699 --> 00:07:22,223
Okay, I'll put this
in my room, too.
161
00:07:22,267 --> 00:07:24,878
And this is...?
162
00:07:24,922 --> 00:07:27,402
Oh, yeah. It's dirt from Fenway.
163
00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:28,969
World Series, 2013.
164
00:07:29,013 --> 00:07:32,103
Mm. What a delightfully
peculiar little square.
165
00:07:32,973 --> 00:07:34,714
You're not so bad yourself.
166
00:07:39,632 --> 00:07:41,112
Yeah, it's a collector's item.
167
00:07:41,155 --> 00:07:43,288
Oh. Well, then it deserves a...
168
00:07:43,331 --> 00:07:45,029
a place of honor,
wouldn't you say?
169
00:07:45,072 --> 00:07:46,944
Uh...
170
00:07:46,987 --> 00:07:49,268
I know. Right. How
'bout here in the bookshelf?
171
00:07:49,294 --> 00:07:51,209
Sure, yeah. I like that idea.
172
00:07:51,252 --> 00:07:52,253
Yeah.
173
00:07:52,297 --> 00:07:54,212
And we'll just do, uh...
174
00:07:54,255 --> 00:07:55,779
Uh...
175
00:07:55,822 --> 00:07:57,520
Let's throw that here.
176
00:08:01,045 --> 00:08:03,177
You know what, Dad, if
I'm gonna be living here,
177
00:08:03,221 --> 00:08:05,092
it might be nice if
I didn't have to hide
178
00:08:05,136 --> 00:08:06,920
- everything that I own.
- You don't.
179
00:08:06,964 --> 00:08:09,575
Anything that doesn't clearly
go better in your bedroom,
180
00:08:09,619 --> 00:08:11,229
I will welcome with open arms.
181
00:08:11,272 --> 00:08:12,872
I want you to feel
comfortable in your...
182
00:08:12,883 --> 00:08:14,711
Don't sit there!
183
00:08:16,321 --> 00:08:18,323
Those are Christian
Lacroix pillows.
184
00:08:18,366 --> 00:08:20,238
So we can't sit on the couch?
185
00:08:20,281 --> 00:08:22,066
Not in jeans.
186
00:08:29,377 --> 00:08:30,988
Huh?
187
00:08:31,031 --> 00:08:32,729
There he is.
188
00:08:32,772 --> 00:08:35,296
- Look at us, sharing a room again.
- Ah.
189
00:08:35,340 --> 00:08:37,081
Just like our Oxford days.
190
00:08:37,124 --> 00:08:38,648
The boys are back.
191
00:08:38,691 --> 00:08:40,345
Watch out, ladies... the
lads are on the loose.
192
00:08:40,345 --> 00:08:41,912
Mothers, lock up your daughters.
193
00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:43,390
Daughters, lock up your mothers.
194
00:08:43,435 --> 00:08:45,611
Oh, who are we kidding?
195
00:08:45,655 --> 00:08:47,265
The only girls we
could ever curl up with
196
00:08:47,308 --> 00:08:48,527
- were the Bronteë sisters.
- Mm.
197
00:08:48,527 --> 00:08:50,355
Emily Dickinson for a quickie.
198
00:08:50,398 --> 00:08:51,661
Oh, yes.
199
00:08:51,704 --> 00:08:52,836
American girls, huh?
200
00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:54,141
Is that Freddy?
201
00:08:54,185 --> 00:08:55,490
Yes.
202
00:08:55,534 --> 00:08:57,188
His brief stint at Harvard.
203
00:08:57,231 --> 00:08:59,103
He's so smart.
204
00:08:59,146 --> 00:09:02,933
I just don't understand
what happened.
205
00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:04,674
You see, this is why
I don't have children.
206
00:09:04,717 --> 00:09:05,979
You have four.
207
00:09:06,023 --> 00:09:07,285
Well, you know what I mean.
208
00:09:09,069 --> 00:09:11,115
- Ah, Dr. Crane.
- Oh.
209
00:09:11,158 --> 00:09:13,117
I'm so sorry we couldn't
get you your own office.
210
00:09:13,160 --> 00:09:14,945
Oh. No, no, I wouldn't
have it any other way.
211
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:17,208
But if one should
open up, just let me know.
212
00:09:17,251 --> 00:09:20,298
Oh. Well, if you
need some more space,
213
00:09:20,341 --> 00:09:22,517
- I'm sure we could move Alan.
- Mm.
214
00:09:22,561 --> 00:09:25,738
Maybe into an unused cadaver
drawer at the medical school.
215
00:09:25,782 --> 00:09:27,653
Yes, you can put
me in the drawer
216
00:09:27,697 --> 00:09:29,960
right next to your love life.
217
00:09:30,003 --> 00:09:32,092
When's the last time you
had a woman on your arm
218
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:34,486
who wasn't placing a blood
pressure cuff around it?
219
00:09:36,270 --> 00:09:39,186
Dr. Crane, we are very
eager to get the word out
220
00:09:39,230 --> 00:09:41,667
about our exciting newfaculty.
221
00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:43,669
Any chance you have some time
222
00:09:43,713 --> 00:09:46,759
for a short interview with
The Boston Globethis evening?
223
00:09:48,065 --> 00:09:49,588
The limelight.
224
00:09:51,329 --> 00:09:53,113
I thought I'd be able to leave
her hungry glow behind me
225
00:09:53,113 --> 00:09:54,419
in Chicago.
226
00:09:54,462 --> 00:09:56,551
"I would give all my
fame for a pot of ale
227
00:09:56,595 --> 00:09:57,944
and safety."
228
00:09:59,424 --> 00:10:01,426
Gotcha. Well, if
you're not into it,
229
00:10:01,469 --> 00:10:03,036
I'll just call The
Boston Globe and...
230
00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:04,342
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
231
00:10:04,385 --> 00:10:06,039
I mean, this is
my cross to bear.
232
00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:08,259
I mean,
my desire for privacy
233
00:10:08,302 --> 00:10:09,695
should be none of your concern.
234
00:10:09,739 --> 00:10:11,654
Eh. Professor Huntview's
also a very big get.
235
00:10:11,697 --> 00:10:13,090
I said I'd do it.
236
00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:15,658
Anything to help put
Harvard on the map.
237
00:10:16,702 --> 00:10:18,051
Mm.
238
00:10:22,839 --> 00:10:24,884
I've been waiting
all day for you.
239
00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:28,409
Eve.
240
00:10:28,453 --> 00:10:29,759
Oh, my God.
241
00:10:29,802 --> 00:10:31,108
Please...
242
00:10:31,151 --> 00:10:32,370
I can't pretend anymore.
243
00:10:32,413 --> 00:10:34,981
I-I just need one
thing from you.
244
00:10:35,025 --> 00:10:36,156
I'm desperate.
245
00:10:37,244 --> 00:10:39,986
No amount of desperation
will make this okay.
246
00:10:41,118 --> 00:10:42,249
I have to go inside.
247
00:10:45,949 --> 00:10:47,298
Freddy.
248
00:10:47,341 --> 00:10:48,429
Smells great in here.
249
00:10:48,473 --> 00:10:49,692
Oh, I made dinner.
250
00:10:49,735 --> 00:10:50,736
Here, have a drink.
251
00:10:50,780 --> 00:10:52,695
Thank you.
252
00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:58,744
- You bought a dining table?
- Yeah.
253
00:10:58,788 --> 00:11:00,703
Well, you said you wanted
my help picking one out.
254
00:11:00,703 --> 00:11:03,140
- Yes, but...
- And you also said that if I found something
255
00:11:03,183 --> 00:11:05,795
that didn't clearly
go in my bedroom,
256
00:11:05,838 --> 00:11:07,448
you would welcome it.
257
00:11:09,755 --> 00:11:11,365
I did, in fact, say that.
258
00:11:12,627 --> 00:11:15,892
It appears to have
an electrical cord.
259
00:11:18,982 --> 00:11:20,461
Plug it in.
260
00:11:33,866 --> 00:11:35,868
It's an air hockey table!
261
00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:40,568
By your logic, you think it
doubles as a dining room table.
262
00:11:40,612 --> 00:11:42,614
Oh, yeah. Sure.
It's space-saving.
263
00:11:42,657 --> 00:11:44,398
I mean, we need an
air hockey table.
264
00:11:44,442 --> 00:11:45,617
Indeed.
265
00:11:45,660 --> 00:11:46,966
And we also need a dining table.
266
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:48,968
So, you know, two for one.
267
00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:50,753
Don't you love the colors?
268
00:11:51,754 --> 00:11:52,798
Which ones?
269
00:11:52,842 --> 00:11:54,800
It appears to have all of them.
270
00:11:56,846 --> 00:11:58,369
Oh! Dad.
271
00:11:58,412 --> 00:11:59,370
Please.
272
00:11:59,413 --> 00:12:00,458
Use a puck.
273
00:12:09,423 --> 00:12:12,078
Pass the salt, please.
274
00:12:12,122 --> 00:12:14,167
Nothing would make me happier.
275
00:12:29,139 --> 00:12:30,793
Mm.
276
00:12:30,836 --> 00:12:32,796
You're right. This could
use some salt. Would you?
277
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:46,634
Freddy, this is all starting to
feel a bit passive-aggressive.
278
00:12:46,678 --> 00:12:48,027
If you're trying
to make a point,
279
00:12:48,071 --> 00:12:49,463
I wish you would just make it.
280
00:12:49,507 --> 00:12:50,682
Okay.
281
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:54,555
Goal!
282
00:12:58,298 --> 00:12:59,909
I'm assuming that
this is revenge
283
00:12:59,952 --> 00:13:01,998
for not wanting your weight
bench in the living room.
284
00:13:01,998 --> 00:13:04,043
Or any of my things.
285
00:13:04,087 --> 00:13:05,740
Only because, happily,
I can provide you
286
00:13:05,784 --> 00:13:07,090
with some nicer things.
287
00:13:07,133 --> 00:13:08,874
To you, they're nicer.
I like my things.
288
00:13:08,918 --> 00:13:11,268
Well, it's just that
they're a bit, um...
289
00:13:11,311 --> 00:13:12,791
Embarrassing.
290
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:14,749
No! No, no, they're
not embarrassing.
291
00:13:14,793 --> 00:13:17,056
You don't want someone
walking into yourapartment
292
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:19,015
seeing mystupid, garish things.
293
00:13:19,058 --> 00:13:20,886
You find them embarrassing.
294
00:13:20,930 --> 00:13:23,715
In fact, I'm not so sure you
don't find meembarrassing.
295
00:13:23,758 --> 00:13:25,586
Oh, that is
absolutely ludicrous.
296
00:13:25,630 --> 00:13:28,415
It's just that I believe that
my Loetz Austrian Art Nouveau
297
00:13:28,459 --> 00:13:31,244
iridescent glass vase might
clash ever so slightly
298
00:13:31,288 --> 00:13:33,246
with your box of dirt.
299
00:13:33,290 --> 00:13:34,987
That box of dirt
300
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:37,163
is from Fenway 2013.
301
00:13:37,207 --> 00:13:39,035
The Sox were in that dirt.
302
00:13:39,078 --> 00:13:42,125
I want to understand
why that's important.
303
00:13:44,127 --> 00:13:47,739
But to me, it just sounds
like a laundry problem.
304
00:13:47,782 --> 00:13:51,395
David Ortiz made MVP
of the World Series
305
00:13:51,438 --> 00:13:53,223
in that dirt. "Big Papi."
306
00:13:53,266 --> 00:13:55,965
Well, good for him...
307
00:13:56,008 --> 00:13:57,401
big sonny.
308
00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:01,057
What? What? Where are you going?
309
00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:02,972
To the bar. I'm gonna
meet some friends.
310
00:14:03,015 --> 00:14:06,105
And when I get back, I think I
should move back in with Eve.
311
00:14:06,149 --> 00:14:09,021
I mean, you like the idea of
us living together and bonding,
312
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:10,936
but you obviously
don't want me here.
313
00:14:10,980 --> 00:14:12,242
Of course I do!
314
00:14:12,285 --> 00:14:14,418
Freddy!
315
00:14:14,461 --> 00:14:16,986
And that's
the end of the period!
316
00:14:23,644 --> 00:14:26,604
Is that reporter here yet?
I've brought two looks.
317
00:14:26,647 --> 00:14:29,824
One serious, one fun. Both gray.
318
00:14:29,868 --> 00:14:31,826
Frasier, look at this.
319
00:14:31,870 --> 00:14:34,481
Found a wonderful picture of
us both from our Oxford days.
320
00:14:34,525 --> 00:14:36,527
Oh, Alan, the memories.
321
00:14:36,570 --> 00:14:39,051
I love it.
322
00:14:39,095 --> 00:14:40,705
That's not me.
323
00:14:40,748 --> 00:14:42,620
Really?
324
00:14:42,663 --> 00:14:44,187
This isn't even you.
325
00:14:46,145 --> 00:14:47,407
Huh.
326
00:14:52,238 --> 00:14:53,979
Are you all right?
327
00:14:54,023 --> 00:14:56,721
Oh, it's Freddy.
328
00:14:56,764 --> 00:14:58,853
He's regressing
into an angry teen.
329
00:14:58,897 --> 00:15:00,464
What's he angry about?
330
00:15:00,507 --> 00:15:02,335
That I don't love Scotch
out of a plastic jug
331
00:15:02,379 --> 00:15:05,556
or a dining set designed
by Dave and Buster.
332
00:15:05,599 --> 00:15:07,210
You ask me, it's all
a bit performative.
333
00:15:07,253 --> 00:15:09,125
Honestly, it's
exaggerated disdain
334
00:15:09,168 --> 00:15:11,562
for anything remotely tasteful.
335
00:15:11,605 --> 00:15:13,216
Just like my father.
336
00:15:14,391 --> 00:15:16,480
Oh, I see what's going on here.
337
00:15:16,523 --> 00:15:18,525
Oh. What
does that mean?
338
00:15:18,569 --> 00:15:20,832
- Pretty obvious, isn't it?
- Please, Alan, I'm not in the mood.
339
00:15:20,832 --> 00:15:24,140
All right, all
right. Not my call.
340
00:15:24,183 --> 00:15:28,144
I'll just write a few things
down in case I forget.
341
00:15:28,187 --> 00:15:30,711
You can do what you want.
It's no concern of mine.
342
00:15:34,324 --> 00:15:35,716
What are you writing?
343
00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:38,371
I don't care.
344
00:15:40,939 --> 00:15:42,549
What did you write?
345
00:15:43,594 --> 00:15:45,465
Let me guess.
346
00:15:45,509 --> 00:15:46,945
You think Frederick
gets under my skin
347
00:15:46,945 --> 00:15:48,338
because he reminds
me of my father.
348
00:15:48,381 --> 00:15:50,296
Some trite
observation like that.
349
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:52,951
Not a bad thought,
Alan, actually.
350
00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:55,780
Can you blame me? I
mean, I loved my father,
351
00:15:55,823 --> 00:16:00,263
but he cringed at
absolutely everything I am.
352
00:16:00,306 --> 00:16:02,352
Can you imagine what that's
like, to have a father
353
00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:04,702
that's that
embarrassed by you...
354
00:16:08,053 --> 00:16:09,185
Okay.
355
00:16:09,228 --> 00:16:11,491
Okay, you made your point.
356
00:16:11,535 --> 00:16:14,407
I'm doing the same
thing with Freddy.
357
00:16:14,451 --> 00:16:16,583
He just wants a father
who accepts him.
358
00:16:20,196 --> 00:16:22,067
Oh, I see what you've done.
359
00:16:22,111 --> 00:16:24,852
It's a neat little parlor trick.
You get me to rev myself up
360
00:16:24,896 --> 00:16:27,768
while you write down absolutely
nothing at all, you...
361
00:16:31,424 --> 00:16:34,558
"Just wants a father
who accepts him."
362
00:16:37,474 --> 00:16:39,737
How the hell did you do that?
363
00:16:39,780 --> 00:16:42,000
Frasier, I've known
you for decades.
364
00:16:42,044 --> 00:16:44,307
I'm an eminent psychiatrist.
365
00:16:44,350 --> 00:16:46,526
Plus, on the other side, I
wrote down "mommy issues"
366
00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:48,093
just to cover my bases.
367
00:16:49,790 --> 00:16:52,097
I can't believe I'm
confessing this,
368
00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:54,447
but I hit my son over the
head with my Art Nouveau vase,
369
00:16:54,491 --> 00:16:57,798
suffocated him with my
Christian Lacroix pillows.
370
00:16:57,842 --> 00:16:59,974
God.
371
00:17:00,018 --> 00:17:02,194
- I hate to admit it, but it's true.
- Uh, Frasier...
372
00:17:02,238 --> 00:17:03,848
No, I've got to get
this off my chest.
373
00:17:03,891 --> 00:17:06,372
I lured my unsuspecting
son into my apartment
374
00:17:06,416 --> 00:17:09,897
with false promises, and now
there's no trace of him left.
375
00:17:11,638 --> 00:17:13,074
God, I'm a monster.
376
00:17:15,338 --> 00:17:17,601
Dr. Crane, this
is Jeneé Whitacker
377
00:17:17,644 --> 00:17:19,123
from The Boston Globe.
378
00:17:20,995 --> 00:17:23,389
Please, I have a family.
379
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:26,958
Excuse me, ladies. I
have a hatchet to bury!
380
00:17:35,967 --> 00:17:38,230
Excuse me, sorry.
Uh, excuse me, uh,
381
00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:39,666
I'm-I'm looking for a...
382
00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:42,234
Oh, my God.
383
00:17:43,279 --> 00:17:44,758
Do you know who you are?
384
00:17:46,151 --> 00:17:48,240
- You're Frasier Crane.
- I am aware of that, yes.
385
00:17:48,284 --> 00:17:51,200
- I'm actually looking...
- My wife used to watch your show all the time.
386
00:17:51,243 --> 00:17:53,941
It gave her the tools to
go after what she wanted.
387
00:17:53,985 --> 00:17:56,292
Uh, ex-wife, I should say.
388
00:17:56,335 --> 00:17:59,033
- I hope she and Leslie are happy.
- Mm-hmm.
389
00:17:59,077 --> 00:18:01,775
And your show helped me pick
up better on social cues.
390
00:18:01,819 --> 00:18:03,168
Oh, very flattering. I'm glad.
391
00:18:03,212 --> 00:18:05,257
As like when I'm
interrupting too much.
392
00:18:05,301 --> 00:18:07,303
Which I understand. You
should be very proud, but I...
393
00:18:07,303 --> 00:18:10,088
You know who you'd be
great for? Our buddy.
394
00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:11,742
His dad died when he was a kid,
395
00:18:11,785 --> 00:18:13,178
and he still can't
talk about it.
396
00:18:13,222 --> 00:18:14,788
Oh, gosh, well, I-I'm
sorry to hear that,
397
00:18:14,788 --> 00:18:16,573
- but...
- Oh, there he is. Hey, Freddy,
398
00:18:16,616 --> 00:18:18,227
look who's here.
399
00:18:18,270 --> 00:18:21,969
It's TV's Frasier Crane.
400
00:18:22,013 --> 00:18:23,449
Yeah.
401
00:18:23,493 --> 00:18:25,364
Hey.
402
00:18:25,408 --> 00:18:27,192
Check it out. He's
friggin' starstruck.
403
00:18:28,759 --> 00:18:29,890
It's a pleasure to
make your acquaintance.
404
00:18:29,890 --> 00:18:31,283
Sorry to hear about your father
405
00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:33,981
dying when you
were just a child.
406
00:18:34,025 --> 00:18:36,593
Yeah, I don't like to
talk about that too much.
407
00:18:36,636 --> 00:18:38,899
Goddamn it, Freddy.
408
00:18:38,943 --> 00:18:41,063
I'm not gonna let you be a
prisoner of your childhood.
409
00:18:41,075 --> 00:18:43,121
Excuse me, Dr. Crane.
410
00:18:43,165 --> 00:18:45,906
Now, process your grief while
we get a bucket of beers.
411
00:18:45,950 --> 00:18:47,169
Yeah.
412
00:18:49,693 --> 00:18:51,173
What you doing here?
413
00:18:51,216 --> 00:18:53,479
Surprised to see me
risen from the grave?
414
00:18:53,523 --> 00:18:54,741
Dad...
415
00:18:54,785 --> 00:18:56,265
I'm still talking, Oedipus.
416
00:19:00,921 --> 00:19:03,707
So, this is why you didn't
ask your firemen buddies
417
00:19:03,750 --> 00:19:05,491
to help you move.
418
00:19:05,535 --> 00:19:09,626
Because you're too, oh,
what was that word you used
419
00:19:09,669 --> 00:19:12,455
to describe how I feel
about you, when actually,
420
00:19:12,498 --> 00:19:14,979
it describes how
you feel about me?
421
00:19:15,022 --> 00:19:17,547
- It's "embarrassed."
- It's "embarrassed."
422
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:20,550
I hope you're hungry, 'cause
this irony is delicious.
423
00:19:22,204 --> 00:19:24,945
- How we doing?
- Oh. Yeah. Wow.
424
00:19:24,989 --> 00:19:27,121
Dr. Crane just
blasted open doors
425
00:19:27,165 --> 00:19:28,471
I didn't even know were there.
426
00:19:28,514 --> 00:19:29,776
Thanks so much, Doc.
427
00:19:29,820 --> 00:19:31,343
We'll let you get
on with your night.
428
00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:34,390
No, no, no, no, hold on.
We've just gotten started.
429
00:19:34,433 --> 00:19:37,131
- So, tell me, Frankie...
- It's "Freddy."
430
00:19:37,175 --> 00:19:40,091
Freddy. Um, tell me about
this father of yours.
431
00:19:40,134 --> 00:19:42,093
Oh, yeah, I-I don't
remember that much.
432
00:19:42,136 --> 00:19:45,096
You told me he was a pipe
fitter from Dorchester.
433
00:19:45,139 --> 00:19:46,532
Other than that, you said he was
434
00:19:46,576 --> 00:19:48,186
this completely
forgettable nobody
435
00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:50,754
who really never made
an impression on anyone.
436
00:19:50,797 --> 00:19:53,757
I-I don't
think I said that, Moose.
437
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:57,021
No, I remember 'cause it
really broke my heart.
438
00:19:57,064 --> 00:19:59,371
- I'm kind of an empath.
- Mm.
439
00:19:59,415 --> 00:20:01,982
And the way your dad died,
440
00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:06,030
impaled by that falling
radio antenna. Mm.
441
00:20:06,073 --> 00:20:08,772
No symbolism to unpack there.
442
00:20:10,556 --> 00:20:12,732
Sounds like your father was
a big disappointment to you.
443
00:20:12,732 --> 00:20:15,169
No, he...
444
00:20:15,213 --> 00:20:18,608
He could sometimes just be
a little hard to be around.
445
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:20,218
How so?
446
00:20:20,262 --> 00:20:22,089
Oh, I don't know, as a
totally random example,
447
00:20:22,133 --> 00:20:24,483
uh, let's say he's
the kind of guy who,
448
00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:27,530
if you're out with some friends,
maybe having a few beers,
449
00:20:27,573 --> 00:20:30,881
suddenly he shows up and
takes over the entire room.
450
00:20:30,924 --> 00:20:32,535
Jerk.
451
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:37,931
Must have been rather difficult
for you, living in that shadow.
452
00:20:37,975 --> 00:20:39,672
It was.
453
00:20:39,716 --> 00:20:42,066
Everybody was always
so wowed by him.
454
00:20:42,109 --> 00:20:44,764
I mean, I know I was. That...
455
00:20:44,808 --> 00:20:46,723
That didn't leave a
lot of space for...
456
00:20:47,724 --> 00:20:49,987
For you.
457
00:20:51,989 --> 00:20:53,817
And then I guess I
kind of lashed out.
458
00:20:53,860 --> 00:20:55,819
Who wouldn't?
459
00:20:55,862 --> 00:20:57,647
It's understandable.
460
00:20:57,690 --> 00:21:00,737
Your father left no room in
the home for your personality.
461
00:21:02,608 --> 00:21:07,483
If he were alive today, I'm sure
he would say that he was sorry.
462
00:21:10,486 --> 00:21:13,706
I hate to poke holes,
463
00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:15,795
but if your dad died
when you were so little
464
00:21:15,839 --> 00:21:17,406
you don't remember him,
465
00:21:17,449 --> 00:21:20,887
how were you overwhelmed
by his big personality?
466
00:21:20,931 --> 00:21:25,196
And also, your dad was a
pipe fitter from Dorchester?
467
00:21:25,239 --> 00:21:27,329
'Cause you told me he was
a plumber from Mattapan,
468
00:21:27,372 --> 00:21:29,592
which could not
be more different.
469
00:21:30,810 --> 00:21:35,380
Freddy, I don't even
want to think about this,
470
00:21:35,424 --> 00:21:37,774
but have you been lying
to us about your dad?
471
00:21:37,817 --> 00:21:42,953
And worse, wasting the valuable
time of Dr. Frasier Crane?
472
00:21:42,996 --> 00:21:44,998
You know what, guys? We don't
need to talk about this.
473
00:21:44,998 --> 00:21:46,565
- You know...
- No, if I may...
474
00:21:46,609 --> 00:21:50,526
There is only one person to
blame for this confusion,
475
00:21:50,569 --> 00:21:51,831
and it's not Freddy.
476
00:21:54,486 --> 00:21:56,358
It's Freddy's mother.
477
00:21:59,535 --> 00:22:03,190
You see, Freddy's mother spoke
so often about his father.
478
00:22:03,234 --> 00:22:05,018
As the legend grew, the
details of his life,
479
00:22:05,062 --> 00:22:07,804
as relayed by his mother,
changed constantly.
480
00:22:07,847 --> 00:22:09,675
One minute a plumber,
another a-a pipe fitter.
481
00:22:09,719 --> 00:22:12,983
And that is because she
actually did not know herself.
482
00:22:13,026 --> 00:22:16,552
Because the truth is, she
wasn't sure who his father was.
483
00:22:20,512 --> 00:22:23,385
She had narrowed
it down to three.
484
00:22:23,428 --> 00:22:26,344
- Mamma mia.
- Precisely.
485
00:22:26,388 --> 00:22:28,128
No, that's the
plot of Mamma Mia!
486
00:22:32,916 --> 00:22:36,746
Pipe fitter from Dorchester,
a plumber from Mattapan
487
00:22:36,789 --> 00:22:40,097
and a dashing psychiatrist
from Cambridge.
488
00:22:40,140 --> 00:22:44,057
You see, only recently,
DNA testing was completed.
489
00:22:44,101 --> 00:22:46,669
I know this because
two weeks ago,
490
00:22:46,712 --> 00:22:48,845
I received a letter
in Chicago...
491
00:22:50,629 --> 00:22:53,545
which is why I am here
this evening in Boston.
492
00:22:53,589 --> 00:22:56,113
- You mean...?
- Yes.
493
00:22:56,156 --> 00:22:57,810
Frederick Crane...
494
00:22:57,854 --> 00:22:59,986
I'm your father.
495
00:23:07,690 --> 00:23:09,779
Why is this called "scooch"?
496
00:23:11,737 --> 00:23:14,218
'Cause they can't
legally call it Scotch.
497
00:23:14,261 --> 00:23:17,482
"Distilled in Orlando."
498
00:23:19,484 --> 00:23:21,573
So, how long before
your friends figure out
499
00:23:21,617 --> 00:23:23,706
we've always had
the same last name?
500
00:23:23,749 --> 00:23:25,447
Well, they didn't question
us already living together
501
00:23:25,447 --> 00:23:28,145
when they came to get the
air hockey table, so...
502
00:23:28,188 --> 00:23:30,234
I think we're good.
503
00:23:30,277 --> 00:23:33,977
I know I can be a bit
overbearing sometimes.
504
00:23:34,020 --> 00:23:37,763
And I know that it mostly
comes from a good place.
505
00:23:40,810 --> 00:23:43,029
Sorry you left Harvard
because you were in my shadow.
506
00:23:43,073 --> 00:23:45,510
I didn't.
507
00:23:45,554 --> 00:23:47,077
I dropped out 'cause I hated it.
508
00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:49,166
Just didn't get along
509
00:23:49,209 --> 00:23:52,169
with any of those snooty,
pretentious eggheads.
510
00:23:52,212 --> 00:23:54,606
They're
not that bad.
511
00:23:54,650 --> 00:23:56,347
You make them sound like Yalies.
512
00:23:57,957 --> 00:24:00,699
I'm just more at home with
the guys at the station.
513
00:24:00,743 --> 00:24:02,962
I like those guys.
I'm like those guys.
514
00:24:03,006 --> 00:24:06,357
But my whole life, any time
anyone finds out who my dad is,
515
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:10,100
I stop being Freddy and start
being Frasier Crane's son.
516
00:24:10,143 --> 00:24:12,494
And I didn't want that again.
517
00:24:13,538 --> 00:24:16,410
So you offed me.
518
00:24:16,454 --> 00:24:19,544
Maybe that's why I should
stick around for a little.
519
00:24:19,588 --> 00:24:22,112
I mean, how many kids
get a second chance
520
00:24:22,155 --> 00:24:23,940
to live with their dead dad?
521
00:24:23,983 --> 00:24:25,768
So you're staying?
522
00:24:25,811 --> 00:24:28,118
You know, I would drink
to that, except I-I can't
523
00:24:28,161 --> 00:24:30,033
have another taste
of this solvent.
524
00:24:31,861 --> 00:24:33,471
You know,
525
00:24:33,515 --> 00:24:36,300
I've been thinking
about your box of dirt,
526
00:24:36,343 --> 00:24:41,914
and I believe it will go
nicely on top of the piano.
527
00:24:41,958 --> 00:24:44,090
Really? You don't
think they'll clash?
528
00:24:44,134 --> 00:24:45,918
No, no, I think they'll
complement each other.
529
00:24:45,918 --> 00:24:49,052
Besides, if I can make a
chaise lounge après-Coco Chanel
530
00:24:49,095 --> 00:24:53,360
work with your grandfather's
duct-taped recliner,
531
00:24:53,404 --> 00:24:54,840
I can make anything work.
532
00:24:56,102 --> 00:25:00,498
Fenway, meet Steinway.
533
00:25:06,025 --> 00:25:07,374
I'll get it.
534
00:25:07,374 --> 00:25:09,376
I'm gonna get a fresh glass.
535
00:25:09,420 --> 00:25:10,769
This one's half-dissolved.
536
00:25:12,466 --> 00:25:14,425
- Eve. Uh...
- Dr. Crane.
537
00:25:14,468 --> 00:25:17,297
About earlier, I-I just
want to clear something up.
538
00:25:17,341 --> 00:25:20,779
Oh, that's all right,
Eve. It's happened before.
539
00:25:20,823 --> 00:25:22,389
Other people figured out
540
00:25:22,433 --> 00:25:24,304
that your voice puts
their baby to sleep?
541
00:25:25,479 --> 00:25:26,916
Yes.
542
00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:31,790
- Could you... I'm just so tired.
- Oh. Of course, of course.
543
00:25:31,790 --> 00:25:35,533
Being a single mom is not as
easy as everyone says it is.
544
00:25:35,577 --> 00:25:38,580
You may be a single mom, but...
545
00:25:38,623 --> 00:25:40,190
that doesn't mean
that you're alone.
546
00:25:40,233 --> 00:25:42,801
Trust me when I tell you that
Freddy and I are both here,
547
00:25:42,845 --> 00:25:44,803
no matter what you
may need, and...
548
00:25:44,847 --> 00:25:47,458
You know, it reminds
me of an observation
549
00:25:47,501 --> 00:25:49,895
made by one of the great
philosophers that...
550
00:25:53,290 --> 00:25:56,249
Funny, my voice really
does put John to sleep.
551
00:26:00,079 --> 00:26:01,820
And you.
552
00:26:04,910 --> 00:26:06,608
Well...
553
00:26:06,651 --> 00:26:09,262
Touchdown for Big Papi.
554
00:26:19,142 --> 00:26:21,187
♪ Y'all know how this goes ♪
555
00:26:22,449 --> 00:26:24,364
♪ Hey, baby, I hear
the blues a-callin' ♪
556
00:26:24,408 --> 00:26:27,846
♪ Tossed salads and
scrambled eggs ♪
557
00:26:29,848 --> 00:26:32,024
♪ And maybe I seem
a bit confused ♪
558
00:26:32,068 --> 00:26:34,853
♪ Yeah, maybe, but
I got you pegged ♪
559
00:26:34,897 --> 00:26:37,551
♪ Ha, ha, ha ♪
560
00:26:37,595 --> 00:26:40,511
♪ But I don't know what to
do with those tossed salads ♪
561
00:26:40,554 --> 00:26:44,602
♪ And scrambled eggs ♪
562
00:26:44,646 --> 00:26:47,257
♪ Life's callin' again ♪
563
00:26:54,699 --> 00:26:56,658
♪ We love you! ♪
564
00:26:56,701 --> 00:27:00,701
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