All language subtitles for Teen.Witch.1989.720p.BluRay.AAC.x264-eng

Richie, get out of there, you little pinhead.

Touch me and die, lady.

Why don't you keep your food
in your own pigsty?

Are your nuts?
That's the first place Mom would look.

All you think about is food.

All you think about is Brad,
the red-hot lover...

Brad the great.

You have been reading my diary again,
haven't you?

Brad, the red-hot lover. Oh, darling!

If I ever catch you reading this again,
I promise, I'll...

"Brad, kiss me, darling.

"I love to feel your arms around me."

Louise, up and at them.

- Mom, I'm already up.
- Breakfast in three minutes.

- Good morning.
- Good morning, honey.

Kitten, you're looking very pretty.

I know, Daddy. This is your favorite color.

No, this is my favorite daughter.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I see Prince Charming has arrived
right on time to pick up Cinderella.

You mean Lady Guinevere.

Can you believe it? How does she do that?

Genes.

- Did you see what she was wearing?
- Who notices what she wears?

It was pretty sleazy. You'd never catch me
wearing something like that.

- I'll say.
- Oh, God.

Taking our time, and we're feeling cool

Don't really need to be hanging in school

It's okay, we got nothing to lose

Can't you see, baby
It's the high school blues

Parents say this interest
is a waste of our time

'Cause they think that we'll learn
about making a dime

What the heck, we know that we are no fools

'Cause we get stuck
With the high school blues

Excuse me, pretty...

Are you sure you go to high school?

Great, just great.

Ignore them. One day we'll be the seniors.

- See you in class.
- Bye, Polly.

Bye.

Hi.

We just wanted to let you know
that you're our candidate. It's in the bag.

- What? I'm...
- For Latin Club President.

- You're a shoo-in.
- So, did your dad get you the car?

It's in the works,
but it doesn't really matter, though.

Brad takes me
everywhere I wanna go, anyway.

Door-to-door l'amour.

The 16th century poets...

raised passion to an art form.

And today, why is it that romance is dead?

Because all the chicks are a drag,
that's why.

Who said that? Well...

Our honor student has graced us
with her presence.

Apparently, skipping grades is not enough
for Miss Miller.

She feels she can also afford to waste
our valuable time, as well.

You people think
this is some sort of game...

that I have nothing better to do
with my time...

than to stand here
and teach Senior English?

Well, do you, Miss Miller?

No, sir. No, Mr. Weaver.

Papers down to the front.

I'll bet not one of you knows
who John Donne is.

One of the Romantic poets
you've been talking about, Mr. Weaver.

My question was purely rhetorical,
Miss Miller.

All right, let's see if anyone in this class...

has been able to convey...

his or her idea of romance into words.

This one is sticky but fascinating.

"He pressed his lips against mine...

"but he didn't stop there.

"Soon every inch of my body was covered...

"with Brad's kisses.

"Who would believe
tonight I was totally his?"

Yes, who indeed?

Miss Miller.

Bye, Louise.

Don't let Weaver get to you.
Everyone knows he's a jerk.

I'll never be able to face Brad again, Polly.

Hey, cheerleaders, I got the new cheer.
So fab.

I like boys!

- See you later, Brad.
- We're animals!

Hey, we're number one.

All right, let's go!

Now for the other two finalists.
As the knight Hans, Brad Powell.

And for the lead role of Ondine,
Louise Miller.

Just think of this as the ultimate test
of your acting ability.

Don't be Louise, be Ondine. You can do it.

- Okay.
- Good luck.

We shall have this hour
always to remember...

the hour before you kissed me...

before you said you loved me.

I can't wait an hour. Tell me now.

Do you think this is something
one says just like that?

What must I do? Sit in your lap?

In my lap of armor?

I have ways of removing armor.

And my arms, do you think they open
to the first comer?

I have ways of opening arms.

And closing them.

Lovely. Very special, all of you. Thank you.

Thank you.

The director has decided that
Lawrence will play the King...

Brad and Kiki will play the leads.

And Louise will be
the assistant costume mistress.

God...

Louise.

- Louise, are you okay?
- Yes, I'm fine.

- Let me help you.
- No, I can do it.

Here. I'm sorry I didn't see you.
I guess it's my fault.

No, it was a failed suicide attempt.

- Listen, can I take you home?
- No, Brad.

- You don't have to.
- I know I don't, but I'd like to.

Bradley, she said she's okay. Let's go.

- Are you sure you're okay?
- Yes, I'm fine.

Go.

Terrific. Now what am I going to do?

Great.

Hello?

Approach, my little one.

Don't be afraid.

Madame Serena knows all, sees all, tells all.

- Come.
- Actually, I just came to use your phone.

Impossible, I never use a phone.

Come.

Sit.

Look, because it is a stormy night...

I will give you a palm reading
at a special price.

Listen, I'm sorry. I really got to go.

- I'm kind of late already and I just...
- Don't worry.

I like you.

I like your cutesy little Punky Brewster face.

How much money you have?

Let me see.

- About $6.
- I knew it.

Okay.

Please put the money on the offering plate
and cover it up.

Madame Serena must never see the money.

You are still in high school...

but that certain somebody
doesn't know you are alive.

Don't worry, somebody you already know
will become your sweetheart.

You will marry him
and you will have two children.

Can you see who he is?

My God in heaven.
What did you say your name was?

It's you.

What do you mean, it's me?

You're not a mark, you're one of us.

One of who?

When is your 16th birthday? Wait.

- Next week, am I right?
- Yeah.

You will receive these powers
on your 16th birthday.

What powers?

Strange things will start to happen,
but you must trust me.

Trust me?

Yeah, sure. Okay, whatever.

Happy birthday, sweetheart.

Well, Mother, the cake is really beautiful.

What's so sweet about her?

Louise, you did mail the invitations,
didn't you?

- Yeah.
- Maybe it's a surprise party.

- Funny, Richie.
- Can I have my cake now?

Right here. Why don't you open your gift
before your friends come?

I bought it for you
at the Young Miss department.

It was very expensive.

Gee, it's really different.

I'm so glad you like it.

I love it. It's great, really.

No one's coming to
your Sweet 16 party, Louise.

- Hello?
- Louise.

- Hi, Polly.
- The worst possible thing is happening.

It's like Birthday on Elm Street. Okay.

I ran into Kiki and Shawn at the mall.
I was getting your birthday present.

- Randa is having a party.
- What?

I mean, tonight.

She's invited everybody after school.

I know, it's like
Revenge of the Cheerleaders.

- Okay, why don't you come over?
- Are you okay?

Okay, I'm there. I'll be right over.

You will receive these powers
on your 16th birthday.

Strange things will start to happen,
but you must trust me.

Trust me.

After 20 years of teaching household skills...

the board has seen fit to ask me
to teach you...

sex education.

Now, Adam had one of these.

Does anyone know
what this might represent?

A roger, a love wand, joystick, dong

Zipper lizard, tally whacker
Trouser snake, schlong

- That's enough, Rhet, thank you.
- No problem.

Now, it's a race against time.

Sparky Sperm is loose
and he's heading for the target...

Edna the Egg. And when he reaches it...

he makes a baby.

And that is exactly what we don't want.

Not yet. So...

use one of these at all times.

It's called a condom.

Condom.

Come on, will you?

- What's the holdup? We ain't got all day.
- Come on.

Let me try.

- Thanks, Brad.
- That's okay.

Oh, divine! Thank you.

This reminds me of
when I played Mary, Queen of Scots.

- Really, you did?
- Yes, in New Haven.

- The critics loved me.
- So what happened?

The best reviews in the world,
and then two years without a part.

Well, I love teaching.

Miss Malloy, I love you.

I mean, you're just not like
the other teachers.

- Darling, all the world's a stage.
- Miss Malloy...

my life is a walking, talking tragedy.

Louise, my dear,
there's so much of you in me, it hurts.

I've never seen this before.

- That's cool.
- Take a look, dear, it's very old.

That's really strange.

Do you like it?

I think you should keep it.

- Me?
- Absolutely. I believe it'll bring you luck.

I feel different already.

Louise, my cousin David is coming in
from out of town...

and he needs a date for the dance Friday.

So I was wondering
if you'd like to come with us.

Sure, okay.

Great, we'll pick you up about 8:00.

- See you.
- Okay. Bye.

See you there. I mean, here.

I mean, then.

- Do you believe that?
- Not really.

Well, I guess everybody else
already had a date.

Louise, she didn't ask me.

Maybe she's really starting to like you.

- Randa?
- Maybe your luck is starting to change.

Oh, my God, what are you going to wear?

Dad?

Come on, kitten, why the long face?

That outfit your mother bought you
looks great on you.

Dad...

this is what everybody's wearing.

I look like such a geek.

Dad, she has no idea what it's like for me.

I'm gonna show you something.

Dad, just forget it, okay?

- I've already seen Mom's senior picture.
- No.

I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.

- So who's that?
- That is your mom in junior high.

That's Mom?

Frank, that's a terrible picture of me.

No, Mom, I think you look really sweet.

Oh, my God, they're here.

How do I look?

- You look very sweet.
- Knock them dead, kitten.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Hi.

I'm David, Randa's cousin. Ready?

Wow, I love your look,
the Beaver Cleaver advance.

You are gonna wear your glasses,
aren't you?

- I don't wear glasses.
- Shall we?

Hey, kids, welcome to your harvest dance.

Yeah, and time to sow some wild oats!

I'm Raymondo, your favorite radio DJ.

You're not here to have fun, you know?

If you don't dance, we shoot at your feet.

Look, can you just go ahead?
I need to go to the ladies' room.

Okay, babe, you got it.

Guess who?

What are you trying to do, embarrass me
in front of a bunch of strangers?

Nice bow tie.

And where did you get the haircut?
Dr. Demento?

Jeez, I didn't think I looked that bad.

It's Friday the 13th
and we're obviously stuck with each other...

- so let's call a truce, okay?
- Okay.

All right, guys, grab your wallets
because here comes a slow song.

- You wanna smoke some weed?
- No.

No drinks, no weed, no pot, no pills,
no roaming hands.

I'd like to sit this one out, if you don't mind.

I could just die.
I can't believe this guy I'm here with.

Be grateful, I had to come alone.

I wish he'd just look at me.

Oh, my God, he's looking right at you.

I wish he'd just come over.

Excuse me, I need to talk to you.
Can we step outside?

Sure, Brad.

Boy, look at those stars.

Yeah, you know, the closest one
is four light years away.

Did you know if we made a wish on it,
it wouldn't come true for eight years?

- Yes, that's...
- I'm sorry. I was just...

When I'm nervous, I just can't stop talking.

What are you nervous about?

- You know, being this close to you.
- Sorry.

Well, what did you want to talk to me about?

- Well, can I speak freely to you?
- Sure, of course.

I have a little brother, I know about men.

Can I come over to your house
tomorrow night?

- My parents are gonna be home.
- That's okay.

I'd like you to help me
with my English paper.

- I'd love to, great.
- Thanks.

You know how Mr. Weaver is...

and if I don't improve on my grade,
I won't be able to play football...

and that pretty much blows
any chance of SC.

Having fun?

Give David your keys.
We're going over to Kiki's in her car.

- Thanks, sport.
- Bye.

The night's young. Let's party.

I can drive through a fog
like a hog with a hard-on.

Let's go, wolf man.

- David, this is not the way to Kiki's.
- Says who?

Give me some soul kisses, baby.

How would you like it
if somebody groped you?

I'd love it, baby. Come on!

I've got an idea.
Let's do it while we're moving.

David, stop it! David, knock it off.

Give me one kiss and I'll be nice.

I wish you would just leave me alone!

What am I gonna do?

How do I get him back? I don't know what
to do. Madame Serena will know what to do.

What if Mom finds out?
She'll kill me. Oh, no!

It looks like she's home now.
Serena, you're not gonna believe this.

Please be there, Serena.

Open up, hello!

No, she's closed.

- Where's Mom?
- Out.

- What are you supposed to be?
- This is disgusting.

You better clean this mess up
before Mom gets home.

I don't have to.

I am telling you,
I don't wanna listen to her yell at you.

You are an unbelievable pig.

I'm rubber, you are glue,
whatever you call me sticks back on you.

No, I'm rubber, you are glue,
whatever you call me sticks back on you.

You think you're hot stuff
'cause you went to a dance.

Dream on, nobody wants to date you
because you are a dog.

A dog!

I feel funny. I can't stand up.

- You are standing up.
- I'm a dog.

Louise, what did you do to me?

- You...
- Nothing I can't fix.

It was just a mistake. I can fix it.

Look at me! Look at all this hair on me.

I even smell like a dog. Louise.

I got to get out of here. Help!

- Richie, I promise I can fix it.
- It's Mom! She hates dogs!

She'll take me off to the pound.

We got to do something.
What are you gonna do?

- You stink. I've got an idea.
- A bath?

- This is your great idea?
- Do you wanna go to the pound?

- Let me go.
- They kill dogs at the pound.

I definitely promise to fix this
just as soon as my friend gets back.

I hate the water. No!

Richie, I'm sorry.

Let me out, you chucker. You pervert!

What did I tell you?
At 16, your powers would come into play.

You know, the really weird thing is...

- I don't even know how I changed him back.
- You didn't.

Beginners' spells are very weak.

They wear off, water reverses them.

- They'll get stronger.
- Me?

A witch?

You have the power
to make anything you want happen.

You mean, like make potions and curses
and all that junk?

- Where did you get that?
- What?

At school. Why?

I think it's time you saw something.

There comes a time in every witch's life
that she must see this.

You won't believe it.

Here it is, "New Faces of 1652."

Look here, that's you.

And you were wearing the same amulet
that you're wearing now.

- And that's me.
- You're kidding.

Then why did I get the amulet again?

Because it belongs to you, you belong to it.

- It's a symbol of your power.
- I wasn't even looking for it.

But it was looking for you.
That's the way magic works.

Here.

Read this. Brush up on your basics.

You're a very lucky girl.

We can even make our own money.
Come on, I'll show you.

First, a lump of coal.
Now put your hand over it.

Come on, repeat after me.

Wanna try $100s?

- No, not now. I got to go.
- Wait.

Louise, I know what it's like at school.

People treat you like a little girl.

Yeah, they do.

Don't you know what this means?

We can change all that...

make them respect you. It'll be fun.

We can?

There's somebody
you want to get back on, right?

Well, maybe.

Sure, I know what it's like to be 16.

I've been 16 four times already.

Liebchen, with me in your corner...

they won't have Louise Miller
to kick around anymore.

Thanks. Thanks, Madame Serena.

Money tree, for me.

Hell's bells.

"Magic works by stimulating the harmonies
that exist in nature.

"All things natural are under your sway...

"the power is in the word,
be careful what you say."

The power is in the word.

"Basic spells to call the winds."

Not bad.

"To summon rain."

"The Truth Spell can be applied
to chronic liars.

"They will only be able to tell the truth,
no matter what the consequences.

"You need the following."

You should sing the lead in the school play.

- Kiki, your voice sounds great.
- No.

I'm not kidding, Kiki.
I mean, doesn't it sound great, Randa?

- You should sing for real.
- Yeah?

What?

It's a new U2 song.

- Yeah, it's really cool.
- Really?

It's an import.

To tell you the truth, Kiki,
your voice is lousy.

- You sound like Pee-Wee Herman.
- What?

- She's right. You cannot carry a tune.
- What do you mean? Yes, I can.

She's just being honest.
Your voice sounds terrible.

You shouldn't even be allowed
to sing Happy Birthday.

Butt out, Shawn.
You know, I don't even like you.

Neither does anybody else.

Great, then I won't have to pick you up
every day and deal with your alchy mother.

Really, Kiki, your mother's a joke.
Everyone feels sorry for you.

And who are you? Princess Di?

You're too lazy to even cover your roots.

Shut up, skank!

I was just kidding, Randa.
I really do like your hair.

Randa, I think the whole world
can see your roots.

Butt out, bitch!

When you look in the mirror...

you're going to thank me for this.

How did it go?

Serena, it was wonderful. It was perfect.

I told you, the time of your life.

This is just the beginning.
It's gonna be like the good old days.

- Madame Serena?
- What?

You know I am crazy about Brad.

Can I, you know, make him love me?

Are you kidding? Love you?

With me being your coach,
he's gonna become your love slave.

- Do you think we can really do this?
- Of course.

But first, you need to do a spell for me.

Now just relax and give me the juice.

- Where did it go?
- Never mind, I know just where to find him.

About Brad, all you need to do
is sprinkle this on your bed.

Get Brad to sit on it while you say:

Now, you mustn't delay with these spells.

They tend to stale.

He's gonna be crazy about you, a love slave.

Oh, Prince! Are you there?

That wonderful witch. She did it.

Darling...

how I have longed to see you
standing there before me...

loving me, adoring me.

What, darling? What do you wanna say?

How long I've waited to hear these words.

Speak, speak.

- Hi, Brad.
- Hi, Louise.

Isn't it a little dim in here for us to study?

Yeah, I can fix that, sure.

Where are all the chairs?

The chairs?

Being reupholstered.

I guess we'll just have to sit on the bed.

Where are all the chairs?

Never mind, just get out and leave us alone
or you'll be having dog food for dinner.

I thought you might like this.

Where are all the chairs?

I moved them so I could exercise.

Call me if you need anything.

Now we won't be disturbed.

Where were we? Oh, yes, sit down.

What?

- What?
- I wish that Brad Powell would...

What do you wish?

Never mind.

Here, have a seat.

Don't ask.

Don't even think about asking.

Listen, do you mind
if I get personal for a minute?

I'd like to apologize for a couple of things.

Why, Brad?

First off, I shouldn't have let you
go home with David.

I mean, he was pretty out of it.

He was harmless.

I told him to get lost and he disappeared.

Anyway, I really appreciate you helping me
with my English paper.

It's so hard for me to concentrate
at the end of the year.

Graduation.

No, the prom.

Randa brings it up every day.

What am I gonna wear?
Where are we going for dinner?

You know, why do you put up with her?

I mean, she seems so superficial.

Every guy wants to go out
with the most popular girl in school.

- Popularity really counts, doesn't it?
- Sure.

We are here to study, not talk.

That's why we refer to it as "study period."

No, allow me.

Expecting rain, Miss Miller?

Please don't go through my purse,
Mr. Weaver.

Birth control pills. All in their place.

Just thinking about it, Louise?

I'm warning you.

Warning me?

Listen to that, will you?

And what will you do if I don't stop?

Tell my mommy?

What a night!

Isn't that cute! What is that?

It's nothing, Mom.

It's just a little something
for school, that's all.

Pleasant dreams, honey.

Okay. You, too. Good night.

All right, Weaver,
let's see how you like being toyed with.

What is the internal conflict
besetting Hamlet...

in this act? Anybody know?

I'll give you a hint, class.

Some of you
may have experienced this problem...

if your parents are divorced.

It is a crisis of adolescence.

Hamlet is calling into question...

his loyalty.

Does it seem hot in here?

Will somebody put on the air?

What is he calling into question?

Nobody thinks it is hot in here?

The answer I am waiting for...

is what is Hamlet calling into question?

His manhood, you idiots!

What is the matter with you people?
His manhood!

Mr. Weaver!

Hot.

It's okay, Mr. Weaver. With a little bit of rest,
you'll be just fine, trust me.

Are you all right, Weaver? You okay?

What next?

How could Richie do this?

She worked so hard on this doll.

Very refreshing.
Of course, I wanna pay for the shower.

No, that's okay. It's free today.

Well, that's for the hot wax.

Louise, dear?

I'm sorry I'm late.

It's just that the most amazing things
have been happening.

- I know.
- I won the state lottery.

- Really?
- Yes, the whole thing.

And the weird thing is
I never even bought a ticket.

I got this letter in the mail...

and then I looked in the pocket
of my sweater, and there was this ticket.

Then I realized how perfectly shabby
I was looking...

so I bought a whole new wardrobe.

- And your hair?
- You like it?

Are you kidding?
Look at you, you're a raving beauty!

Well, I don't know...

Anyway, when I left the salon,
I met the most wonderful man.

Actually, he's an Argentine count,
Armando Lagando.

Don't tell anyone,
but I'm taking a sabbatical.

- Well, it's about time.
- Come on.

And the most wonderful thing,
he's taking me around the world...

and a few other places
I can't quite remember.

I don't know why, but I want to thank you.

There he is: Count Lagando.

Darling, this is that darling Louise.

Louise, I'm leaving everything
in your capable hands.

Take hope, dear child.
Believe me, anything can happen.

Brad just waved to you!

I wish he saw more of me
than just brains, though, you know?

Give him time. Men are like another species.

They're really hard to get through to.
Take Rhet, for example.

Capiletti? You like Rhet, Polly?

You think he is weird, don't you?

I mean, he's not exactly my type, but...

Yeah, I guess he's cute.

And he's really nice and he's really funny.

I heard him in class once.
And he has the cutest walk.

I guess I can see you guys together.

I'm king, and they know it

When I snap my fingers
Everybody says, "Show it"

I'm hot and you're not

But if you wanna hang with me
I'll give it one shot. Top that!

- Want a gum?
- No, I'm not in the mood.

Oh, my God.

You can dream until you're blue
But you will never top that

Let's go back the other way.

No, just go up and then talk to him.

Are you kidding? I'm so embarrassed.

Look at how funky he is.

I will never be hip.

I'm hot and you're not

But if you wanna hang with me
I'll give it one shot. Top that!

You can do all that you can
But you'll never top that. Top that!

Supersonic, idiotic
disconnected, not respected

Who would ever really wanna
go and top that?

Such a waste, a pretty face
But hanging in your knowing face

I wish you would take a look
and really stop that. Top that!

I don't really give a... about
trying to top that. Top that!

Stop that

I wish you'd finally take a real look
and really stop that

- What's this?
- Stop that

- What gives?
- Stop that

I don't really give a... about trying to top that

- Top that
- Big deal

- Stop that
- Unreal

- You can try until you're blue
- I'll make a fool of you

Top that!

Top that!

Hi, Serena.

What is that? Is it a revenge potion,
or a bad luck spell, or what?

It's goulash.

Sorry.

So, liebchen...

now he's eating
out of the palm of your hand, right?

No, I couldn't do it.

Of course you could.

No, don't you see?
I don't want to put a spell on him.

I want him to like me because of me,
because he thinks I'm fabulous.

Kids, they're never satisfied.

And another thing.

I wanna look like her.

Seems like a waste of a good spell.

Come on, Serena, listen...

everybody keeps telling me I'm gonna be
this big heartbreaker when I'm older.

But I'm ready now
and I'm just tired of waiting, you know?

I mean, I wanna be the most popular girl.

That's a big spell. It involves a lot of people.

I'm not sure your powers
are strong enough yet.

So you'll help me, right?

Right?

Most popular girl.

This one looks good.

Cleopatra. Marie Antoinette.

Marilyn Monroe. Annette Funicello.

No.

Let's see what you've got.

Yes, we might be able to pull this one off.

- Could you hand me this, dear?
- Sure.

Please, sit down.

I never thought I'd do this for anyone.

What's this?

The last of my powers.
I was saving it for a mink coat...

to wear in the Ice Age.

All right, that's it!

All right.

You'll need a piece of her clothing...

and one of her records.

And then sprinkle this all over yourself...

and spin around 13 times at 45 rpm...

counterclockwise and repeat this:

Louise, you're crazy!
How do you expect to get in to see Shana?

Just walk right in.

I have this feeling
she wants to give me her tour jacket.

I've been going out of my mind

Trying to find the way to make you mine

Oh, my God, was that John McCune?

- Yeah, I think so. Be quiet.
- This is so exciting.

You can't come back here.
You have to be on a list to come back here.

Well, my name is Louise Miller
and we are on the list.

You're not on my list, I know.

Check it again because I know we're on it.

Look, I just made the list out.

Miller?

You weren't on the list a second ago.

Here, here's your two passes.

Thank you.

How did you do this?

I can't believe it! Can you believe it?

I know, I cannot believe...

we're on a real stage,
Shana is right there, and we're right here.

Look, that audience
is getting totally trashed.

- Let's wave.
- No.

My God!

Shana is looking right at you.

Louise, did you have any trouble
getting back here?

No.

I'm glad you made it.

Look, I want you to have this jacket.

I've had it since my first album,
it's my lucky jacket. Please.

Okay. Sure, Shana.

Well, I gotta go, they're taping this.

- I'll talk to you guys later.
- Bye.

Oh, my God!

Louise, would you turn the music down?
I can't hear myself think.

Louise, why don't you ride
to school with us?

Love to.

Hey, sugar, won't you ride with us?

Come on, pretty baby
Don't you put up a fuss

Looks like you really caught my eye

Jump in the car so that we can all fly

Be cool, baby, don't you put up a fight

Whether it's Wednesday or a Saturday night

We'd like you to you come into our world

'Cause every cool guy needs a popular girl

Come on, hurry up.

Isn't this great?

You scared me.

Yeah, this is...

It's neat.

You know...

Great.

He took the long way
and then he kissed you.

How did you know?

I'm Serena, dear. I know everything.

Yeah, but why?

Why did he kiss me?
Was it because of the spell?

What's the difference?
You're irresistible, that's what you wanted.

Yeah, but if it was because of the spell,
then how do I know he really cares?

Louise, darling, what's the difference?

The difference is I don't want him
to just suddenly stop liking me.

Well, that happens with or without magic.

Not if love is real.

Falling in love is just a trick, anyway.

The right lighting, the right music,
the right haircut...

People fall in love,
and then one day it's over.

When he kissed me...

was he really kissing me?

Louise, nothing lasts forever.

That is just too depressing to believe.

I mean, some people fall in love
and they stay in love.

- Hi, Louise.
- Hi.

I love her hair.

What a radical outfit, Louise.

Yeah, you're so funny, too.

I wish I looked like Louise.

I wish I was Louise.

My, aren't we trend-setting this morning?

You know, this is so weird.
Everybody looks like me.

Well, the price of fame and fortune
is to be envied...

then copied, and finally discarded.

Says who?

I read it someplace. Probably Rob Lowe.

"My dearest Louise, Armando and I
have done Europe twice already...

"and now we are in Aruba.

"Armando's teaching me Spanish.

"I'm so happy. You brought me luck, Louise,
and I love you for it."

"With love always, Edith Malloy."

Louise, my first lead in the school play.

I'm so excited!

Too bad Miss Malloy isn't here to see it.

Hurry up, girls, and don't say good luck.

Why not?

Show biz superstition.

Okay, there. Break a leg.

Break a leg.
That's what you're supposed to say.

- Neat.
- You're on, Kiki.

Break a leg, Kiki!

I can't move it. It's broken.

Kiki, I didn't mean it.

Louise, you're the understudy.
You'll have to play it.

Jeez, Louise, what did you do, trip her?

I hear you got the lead in the school play.

Well, it looks like Cinderella
is finally going to the ball.

Yeah, the dance.

What's the matter, glass slipper doesn't fit?

Yeah, I guess so.

It's like when you really need someone
to notice you, they don't, you know?

You know, kitten, it doesn't really matter...

how other people see you.
What matters is how you see yourself.

Thanks, Dad.

Hi.

- How are you?
- Why?

God, Polly! Come on, we used to be friends.

You never talk to me anymore.

"Used to" is the operative word.

Why don't I ever see you?

Maybe I don't wanna have to make
an appointment, you're so busy now.

- God, I thought you'd be happy for me.
- Delighted.

Come on, Polly, I really miss you.

Why?

You need another dweeb
hanging on your every precious word?

Believe it or not, I care about you, okay?

Well, you don't act like it.

You became the swan
and you left me right in the duck pond.

- Polly!
- Forget it.

There's no room for me in your new life.

Louise, come on!

Louise, we can't start without you.

What?

I prepared you a wholesome breakfast.

Your morning paper.

I took the liberty of ironing your homework.

Thank you, Richard.

Richie's cleaned everything up.

He even straightened out
the refrigerator shelves.

Do you think he is on drugs?

What?

We want Louise!

I thought you might come out this way.
Come on, hop in.

So, it's tough being
the most popular girl, huh?

- I thought it would make me happy.
- And it didn't?

Well, yeah, for a while.
And, no, it didn't last.

I know what you mean.

You know, sometimes I wonder
who my real friends are.

I've been football team captain
since the sixth grade.

What happens when I go to college
and I have to start all over?

- It doesn't matter.
- How do you know?

Brad, you have a lot of fine qualities
that have nothing to do with football.

You think so?

I know so.

Louise, I want you
to go to the dance with me.

- Really?
- Yeah.

You're an amazing girl, Louise.
I've never met anyone quite like you.

- Well, is that good?
- Is that good? That's great.

You're not phony, you don't play games
with people to make them like you more.

That's really important to me.

- Brad, I just...
- Let me finish.

You're honest and I respect you for that.

No, this is a bad idea.

I can't go to the dance with you.

Why?

Because there is just something
you don't know about me.

- I know everything I need to know.
- No, you don't.

Why don't you just go to the dance
with Randa?

Forget Randa, I wanna go with you.
It's only natural.

It's not natural.

Look, there are just some things
you don't understand about all this, okay?

- Louise, this is really stupid...
- I can't go to the dance with you!

Don't ask me why. I gotta go.

Louise, it's gorgeous, it's perfect.

You shouldn't have. You're an artist.

What an eye for detail.

Serena, listen, you've got to help me.

I sat up all night trying to figure out a way
to reverse the spell.

I can't find anything in this whole book.

What do you mean, reverse the spells?

I mean, make it go back, the way it was.

I just want everything and everyone
to go back to the way it was.

Reverse?

Now that I have all this?

Absolutely not!

Everyone loves and listens to you, right?

I mean, they agree with me
before I even finish what I'm saying.

Picky, picky.

You don't know what a luxury it is
to have people agree with you.

I'm not happy, okay?

Who is happy? You'll get used to it.

Believe me, you're gonna knock them dead
at the dance.

You wanna give that up?

I just wanna be me.

I mean, all this stuff is happening,
but it just...

I don't know, it just doesn't feel like
it's happening to me.

Let's give it a shot for a couple of years
and then make a decision.

Come on, Serena, help me.

Please.

Come here, sit down.

All right.

It's lonely.

I know.

I had to make people like me.

You never knew how people felt?

I didn't want to take the chance.

So I can change it all?

The real magic...

is believing in yourself.

If you can do that...

you can make anything happen.

Thank you.

My dad got me into Stanford.
He's a Stanford man.

Yeah, I wanted to go to Vidal Sasoon...

but my mother's making me go
to Malibu Junior College.

I got into SF State.

And Brad's gonna visit me every weekend,
aren't you, honey?

So, did your dad get you the car?

No, he got me a Schwinn.
Can you believe it?

It's like I'm cursed.

You know, it could have been worse.
You could have been here with that.

I don't know.

All right, guys...

this joint is crawling with hungry women.
Let's make our move.