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1
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:20,811
Good luck, Sonny!
2
00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:24,019
Good job, Hooper!
3
00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:34,909
Okay, now, look alive.
Here comes the director.
4
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:45,215
Did you have a good lunch?
5
00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:55,927
- You all set?
- Ready.
6
00:03:56,027 --> 00:03:57,890
Six-three, Louis.
7
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:02,434
Okay, Hooper, stand by now.
We're about set.
8
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:10,065
- Roll the cameras.
- Rolling, Jack.
9
00:04:10,167 --> 00:04:12,906
Scene two, take one, B camera. Marker.
10
00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:18,198
- We're ready to make the shot, Roger.
- Action.
11
00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:19,708
Action. Come on, Hooper.
12
00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:43,934
Cut! Did you get it?
13
00:04:44,034 --> 00:04:45,936
- Good.
- Print it.
14
00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:49,064
Let's get ready for the next setup.
Get the first team in there.
15
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:50,981
Get me down, Joe.
16
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,903
Don't move, Hooper! Don't move!
17
00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:58,197
- Need a picture, Jack? Booga-booga-booga!
- Hold still, Hooper.
18
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,284
- You all right? Huh?
- Oh. Terrific.
19
00:05:01,384 --> 00:05:04,246
- I'm serious, now. You all right?
- I invented that stunt.
20
00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:06,873
There ain't nobody in the world
that does it better.
21
00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:09,835
- And you say that in all humility?
- I give great humble.
22
00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:13,422
- It's okay. Not a scratch.
- You sure?
23
00:05:13,522 --> 00:05:17,091
- I'm not talking about your ass.
- Okay, let's have the first team!
24
00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:20,887
- What would you give for a little of that?
- Two nipples for a dime.
25
00:05:22,197 --> 00:05:24,975
- Sonny, that was terrific.
- No, that's terrific.
26
00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:27,393
- Teach me to do that gag sometime.
- Ha, ha.
27
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:30,021
He wants to learn how to do that.
What, are you crazy?
28
00:05:30,121 --> 00:05:31,857
I want to ride under trucks.
29
00:05:31,957 --> 00:05:34,109
- Come on, teach me some gags.
- Oh, for chrissake.
30
00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:37,738
- West, can I have you in position over here?
- Right away, Tony.
31
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:39,405
I'll make a deal with you.
32
00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,533
I won't do any acting...
33
00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:44,411
- ...you don't do any stunts, okay?
- Adam, please?
34
00:05:45,971 --> 00:05:47,538
- Okay.
- Okay.
35
00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:49,456
- Mr. West! Please!
- Coming, little lady.
36
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:52,505
Hooper.
37
00:05:54,271 --> 00:05:57,549
- Hooper, you can wrap for the day.
- How was the stunt? Okay?
38
00:05:57,649 --> 00:05:59,426
- Yes.
- That good, huh?
39
00:05:59,526 --> 00:06:02,262
- Yeah.
- Would you go so far as to say perfect?
40
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,515
Well, that's what he's supposed
to be, isn't he? Ha-ha-ha.
41
00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:06,975
Tony!
42
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:09,436
I hate it when directors
slobber all over me.
43
00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:13,940
When your last picture made over $100 million,
you don't have to slobber over anybody.
44
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:16,526
- You got any Percs?
- Yeah, here.
45
00:06:16,626 --> 00:06:19,194
If you're hurting that bad,
want me to go get the kit?
46
00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:22,490
- No, I'll just chomp on a couple of these.
- What is it this time?
47
00:06:22,591 --> 00:06:23,908
It's my frigging back.
48
00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:28,161
- Are you all right, Sonny?
- Never felt better and had less.
49
00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:30,415
- Listen, you can be replaced.
- Ha, ha.
50
00:06:30,515 --> 00:06:33,333
- The bike gag was terrific.
- Would've killed your ordinary man.
51
00:06:33,435 --> 00:06:37,339
- Mm. Cully, you taking care of my boy?
- Well, I'm trying to, Mr. Berns.
52
00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:40,175
Well, make sure you don't give him
any more of those goddamn pills.
53
00:06:41,443 --> 00:06:44,554
By the way, Sonny,
there's a new kid in town.
54
00:06:44,654 --> 00:06:47,015
Everyone says he's a young Sonny Hooper.
55
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,392
- Would you like to check him out?
- I'm full up.
56
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:52,020
- You're the boss. See you later.
- Thanks.
57
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:54,606
- Now, take care.
- See you, Max.
58
00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:58,860
Why is it every time I come to town...
59
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:01,196
some young boy...
60
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:03,824
has gotta try
and make a name for himself?
61
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:06,993
- Do Gregory Peck for the doctor.
- I don't want to see him.
62
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,704
- Gotta go to get some x-rays.
- I've seen my x-rays.
63
00:07:09,804 --> 00:07:13,248
- They look like a map of L.A.
- Maybe you've built another off-ramp.
64
00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:15,292
Wait a minute.
65
00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:19,088
The Percodan is starting to work.
I feel the pain is vanishing.
66
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:22,843
By God, I think she can dance.
I think she can turn. I think she can whirl.
67
00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:27,013
Whoo! Ooh! Jesus!
How about a date? Ha, ha.
68
00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:44,571
Dancer!
69
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:58,468
She'll be here in a minute, Dancer.
70
00:07:59,354 --> 00:08:01,171
- Perfect companion.
- Me or Dancer?
71
00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:03,840
I wouldn't kick either one of you
out of the hay.
72
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:11,224
Hey, you never feed me
a can of beer like that.
73
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:14,561
- You don't shake it up and down like that.
- Oh, that's very true.
74
00:08:17,372 --> 00:08:21,401
- How'd it go today? Okay? No problems?
- Okay. No.
75
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,194
You fill all those little minds
at school with knowledge?
76
00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,031
- I did my very best.
- Ah.
77
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:29,784
- Cully called. How's your back?
- Oh, yeah? He's got a big mouth.
78
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:31,451
Oh, come on, how's your back?
79
00:08:31,553 --> 00:08:34,371
A lot better than his butt's
gonna be after I kick it.
80
00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:37,791
What the hell's the matter with Cully,
calling you up all the time?
81
00:08:37,892 --> 00:08:40,295
- Sonny. Your eyes are dilated.
- What?
82
00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:43,298
- Oh, don't start.
- How many pain pills did you take?
83
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:46,927
I had two, for crying out loud.
I don't take dope. I don't take cocaine.
84
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:50,263
I don't smoke pot. I take pain pills.
I got pain, for chrissake.
85
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,599
Look at my socks.
What are they doing...?
86
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,601
- Those are your socks.
- I know they are.
87
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:57,729
Why are they on the phone?
My pants are on the chandelier.
88
00:08:57,829 --> 00:09:00,647
- You threw them there last week.
- I was in a horny mood.
89
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:03,693
It's all over the place.
It's like a beer-can collection.
90
00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:07,530
- It's not a big deal. You don't work that hard.
- I thought of putting it away.
91
00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:11,409
Well, why don't you put it away?
Why don't you take the stuff, put it in...?
92
00:09:11,509 --> 00:09:13,076
Sit down, will you?
93
00:09:17,849 --> 00:09:21,127
Now, do you want to hear
my thinking on this?
94
00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:25,547
If I just let things pile up long enough,
we won't be able to find each other.
95
00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:29,260
And if you can't find me,
you can't have me.
96
00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:32,725
- That makes sense. Ha, ha.
- Yes.
97
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:35,392
Sonny...
98
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:38,310
I'm not asking for miracles.
99
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:42,481
If you could just get the beer cans,
say, 25 feet from...
100
00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:45,526
Ten feet from the trash can. Ten feet.
101
00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,660
It's close enough. I'm yours.
102
00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:03,710
- Is your back okay, really?
- It's fine.
103
00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:07,723
- Did you want to walk on it?
- No, I want you to crawl under it.
104
00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:18,059
All right, we're ready down here.
Could we clear the area, please?
105
00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:20,977
- Don't stand in front of the cameras.
- You're a brave doggy.
106
00:10:21,079 --> 00:10:23,440
- Right here?
- Put your hand right through there.
107
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:26,358
- You guys ready on the roof?
- Working on it.
108
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,611
- It's tied off? Okay.
- Tied off.
109
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:31,114
- I love danger.
- Okay, we're ready down here.
110
00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,781
Okay, don't look down now.
111
00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:35,910
- Roll the cameras!
- Five, six on all cameras.
112
00:10:36,010 --> 00:10:38,413
- A camera mark.
- B camera mark.
113
00:10:38,513 --> 00:10:40,455
Okay. Action!
114
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:44,753
Cut, cut! Sensational, Adam!
115
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,713
Rest for a minute.
116
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,715
- Good job there, Adam.
- Was I all right?
117
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:51,301
Help Mr. West down the steps.
118
00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:55,721
All right, now, let's get set up
for this stunt. Let's move it. Move it!
119
00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:57,932
- Good morning.
- Hey, Sonny, how are you?
120
00:10:58,032 --> 00:11:00,643
- Morning, dwarf.
- Clever. You ready?
121
00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:04,230
- Where's "Mr. Movie"? Oh, good morning.
- Right here. Good morning.
122
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:06,816
Now, as I was telling you
the other day, Hooper...
123
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:09,985
in this scene you'll be escaping
across the roof with the dog.
124
00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:12,697
The dog? Why do I have a dog?
125
00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:17,160
Just do the stunts like I tell you.
Let me worry about the creativity, okay?
126
00:11:17,260 --> 00:11:19,996
Now, about halfway through,
the sling will break...
127
00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:22,749
and down you will come, dog and all.
128
00:11:22,849 --> 00:11:25,627
And I'll pick up Adam falling off
the awning. It's simple.
129
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:28,213
If it's so simple,
why don't we have the actor do it?
130
00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:30,799
- I'd like that in one take, Hooper.
- I hope so.
131
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,966
- Okay, people, let's go.
- Just a minute.
132
00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:35,885
Sonny, do you remember me?
133
00:11:35,987 --> 00:11:38,389
- Bidwell from the Humane Society.
- Oh, hi.
134
00:11:38,489 --> 00:11:42,727
- No dog is gonna fall from that.
- No, sir. We have a dummy dog.
135
00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:47,315
The sequence is King riding
with Sonny here, and then we cut...
136
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:50,108
and substitute the dummy dog
for the actual fall.
137
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:52,403
I don't know.
I don't like the whole setup.
138
00:11:52,503 --> 00:11:55,947
I don't like it either.
I'm the one that's got to do the falling.
139
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:57,991
But you made that decision for yourself.
140
00:11:58,092 --> 00:12:01,079
- The poor dog can't make that decision.
- Don't worry, sir.
141
00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:05,667
The company is very eager to comply
with all Humane Society regulations.
142
00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:09,462
- So we really must be going now.
- Good to see you again, George.
143
00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:13,215
As you can see,
the dummy dog wouldn't fool anybody.
144
00:12:13,316 --> 00:12:16,385
- It wouldn't fool me.
- The realie will take the fall with you.
145
00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:18,929
- Oh, for chrissake.
- There's my man.
146
00:12:19,030 --> 00:12:22,016
- Make me look great, Sonny.
- I'll make you look great, Adam.
147
00:12:22,116 --> 00:12:26,146
You can't use a real dog, Tony,
for chrissake. He can't hit an airbag.
148
00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:28,231
Maybe you can teach him on the way down.
149
00:12:28,331 --> 00:12:30,441
- Do me a favor, will you?
- Yeah, what is it?
150
00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:33,528
- Bring me a stepladder about this high.
- Yeah, what for?
151
00:12:33,628 --> 00:12:36,321
I want you to climb up
on it and kiss my ass.
152
00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:38,535
See you later, Toulouse!
153
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:48,751
All right, people, when Mr. Wonderful
gets on his perch...
154
00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:50,463
let's all be ready.
155
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:57,302
Okay, people, we're ready.
Clear it fast. Get ready on the roof.
156
00:12:57,402 --> 00:13:01,472
- Good man.
- How are you guys today?
157
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:03,850
- Morning.
- How you doing?
158
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:05,767
It's all yours.
159
00:13:07,662 --> 00:13:10,355
- Okay, all set there, Sonny?
- Hooper!
160
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:13,274
People are growing old down here.
161
00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:17,241
One second. You're waiting on me,
you're backing up!
162
00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:20,789
Give me the pooch.
163
00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:27,540
- Okay. Got it?
- Nice doggy. Time for a little ride.
164
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,082
Roll the cameras.
165
00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:32,127
- Mark central camera.
- Make it good, Hooper.
166
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:46,725
Cut! Print it.
167
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,603
New setup over here.
168
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:54,483
I'll make you an official stunt dog.
Cully, get this dog a belt buckle.
169
00:13:54,584 --> 00:13:57,070
- Nice going, Sonny.
- You all right?
170
00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,363
- Yeah, I'm all right. Yeah.
- Really?
171
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:00,951
I'm fine.
172
00:14:03,343 --> 00:14:06,996
- You hit like a sack. Are you okay?
- I suppose you thought that was cute.
173
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:09,289
What happened to the cut? The dummy dog?
174
00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:13,335
What the hell are you getting on his case for?
He risked his life for that dog.
175
00:14:13,436 --> 00:14:15,003
Use the realie. More realistic.
176
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:17,171
Do it in one take. Impress the director.
177
00:14:17,273 --> 00:14:19,841
Tony said that's what you were gonna do
and you did it.
178
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:24,137
Well, we're gonna be pressing formal charges
against you, Sonny. You...
179
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:33,398
That little runt.
180
00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:35,236
That's one I owe him.
181
00:14:36,626 --> 00:14:38,236
You got your kit?
182
00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:39,862
It's in the trailer.
183
00:14:39,962 --> 00:14:42,496
- Well, let's go to the trailer.
- I knew it.
184
00:14:43,925 --> 00:14:46,828
Do you know what I'd do if I met
the man that invented Xylocaine?
185
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,204
What?
186
00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:51,122
I would kiss his ass
right on Hollywood and Vine.
187
00:14:51,224 --> 00:14:55,294
Ha, ha. I knew you were hurt
the minute you hit that bag.
188
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:58,088
- But you had to protect the dog.
- I love dogs.
189
00:14:58,189 --> 00:15:00,341
- Let's go to the doctor's.
- I hate doctors.
190
00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:02,302
You ain't scared of nothing.
191
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:05,054
- Why are you scared of doctors?
- Scared of dentists too.
192
00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:07,140
I'll tell you what you're scared of.
193
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:10,601
- You're scared of what he's gonna tell you.
- Oh, balls. Balls! Balls!
194
00:15:10,701 --> 00:15:12,687
You're gonna have to see him eventually.
195
00:15:12,787 --> 00:15:15,731
I'll buy the drink
I was gonna buy you last night...
196
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,942
if you'll just do me
your Jimmy Stewart imitation.
197
00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:19,484
Just a little Jimmy Stewart for me.
198
00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:21,778
That's... That's a good deal.
199
00:15:21,879 --> 00:15:25,408
I'll do Jimmy Stewart,
and you do Roy Rogers' sidekick.
200
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:27,325
- Roy's sidekick.
- Yeah.
201
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:30,705
Roy is a good old boy, but he...
202
00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:32,622
He had Trigger stuffed, you know?
203
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:35,585
So when you die,
I'm gonna have you stuffed.
204
00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:36,794
You wouldn't.
205
00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:39,587
I'm gonna stuff everything
but your old wing-dinger.
206
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:43,593
- That's the part that needs stuffing.
- You ought to stuff that every night.
207
00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:46,261
I'll leave that up to you.
I'm a little too old for it.
208
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,930
- Well, I ain't gonna hold it.
- No. Hell, no.
209
00:15:49,031 --> 00:15:50,767
Banker's hours, eh, Sonny?
210
00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:54,395
- Sonny, it's early for the Palomino, isn't it?
- Not for me, old cock.
211
00:15:54,495 --> 00:15:58,030
- I'll tell you what, that job was perfect.
- Good shot, good shot.
212
00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:08,533
- Hello, Jimbo.
- How you doing, Sonny?
213
00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:13,831
What you doing out here with my lady
when I'm not around? That's dangerous.
214
00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:17,125
- Not as dangerous as doing stunts.
- Yes, it is.
215
00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:19,754
What can I do for you, pard?
216
00:16:19,854 --> 00:16:23,007
I just wanted to make sure
you're doing that charity stunt show.
217
00:16:23,107 --> 00:16:26,260
Oh, I'd love to,
but I'm going on a motocross.
218
00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:28,427
It's for the benefit of the Boys' Home.
219
00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:32,517
That's real touching, but I'm gonna get
on my bike and go across the desert.
220
00:16:32,617 --> 00:16:35,686
I've got somebody who'd really like
to meet you. Idolizes you.
221
00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:39,481
- Knows everything you've ever done.
- Who's that?
222
00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:41,609
One of the boys from the home.
223
00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:43,526
I'll just get him.
224
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:47,448
- Why didn't he bring violins?
- Honey, it's a boy from the Boys' Home.
225
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:50,326
They need someone to pattern
their lives after, you know?
226
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,370
- Yeah, what a cheap shot.
- Pete, meet Sonny.
227
00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:55,413
- Hi, Pete.
- Sonny, how you doing?
228
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:56,832
Real good. How you doing?
229
00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,709
- Fine. Guess what.
- What?
230
00:16:58,809 --> 00:17:00,670
- I can do a stunt.
- You can do a stunt?
231
00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:02,837
- Yeah.
- Let me see it.
232
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:08,969
- Okay, get on there. Shoot him.
- Move it.
233
00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:10,847
- Do what?
- Shoot him.
234
00:17:10,947 --> 00:17:12,223
- Move it.
- Bang.
235
00:17:15,826 --> 00:17:19,111
That's terrific, but I'm going
on the motocross Saturday.
236
00:17:19,580 --> 00:17:24,401
Well, I guess I'll just have to give your gags
to that hot new kid with Stunts Unlimited.
237
00:17:24,502 --> 00:17:28,239
- Oh, yeah? How old are you, kid?
- I'm still dead.
238
00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:29,906
Oh. Right, yeah.
239
00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:32,700
Well, you don't have to be dead anymore.
How old are you?
240
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:36,372
- I'm 18.
- Eight.
241
00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:39,709
- Yeah.
- Okay, I'll be there Saturday.
242
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:41,794
- Great!
- Ha, ha.
243
00:17:43,354 --> 00:17:45,465
Give me five!
244
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:48,759
- See you Saturday.
- Thanks, Sonny. You're all heart.
245
00:17:48,859 --> 00:17:50,426
Yeah.
246
00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:54,515
Sonny. What a wonderful gesture.
247
00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:57,809
- Ah, I'm a wonderful person.
- Aw.
248
00:17:58,077 --> 00:18:01,564
Welcome to the 5th Annual
Stuntmen's Benefit Show...
249
00:18:01,664 --> 00:18:04,027
and up the street to your left,
here they come!
250
00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:05,942
Giddyap!
251
00:18:17,346 --> 00:18:20,333
And pay attention
to the stagecoach driver, Billy Burton...
252
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:23,217
the best muleskinner in Hollywood.
253
00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:30,432
I see you liked it.
254
00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:33,511
Hey, lady.
255
00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:36,516
- Oh. Hello, Dad.
- Where'd you get all them house apes?
256
00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:39,685
Kids. Where are my kids here?
This is my father.
257
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:41,437
Hi.
258
00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:42,979
Sonny coming with Dancer?
259
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:46,692
Yeah. You know why he's here, don't you?
Have you seen that new kid work?
260
00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:49,360
Now that son of a bitch knows
how I felt when he came...
261
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:53,241
- Dad! The language.
- What? Oh. Shit. Sorry. Damn.
262
00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:55,950
Ignore him. He's a degenerate.
263
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:14,970
Now, how about a big round of applause
for these two young ladies?
264
00:19:15,071 --> 00:19:18,015
That's all the pay they're gonna get.
265
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:22,686
Look out, it's Black Bart,
the meanest hombre west of the Pecos.
266
00:19:22,787 --> 00:19:27,316
What we need now is a hero
who can stop him.
267
00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:30,530
- Yee!
- And here he is, just in time!
268
00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:44,795
That man is one of the true legends
of the stunt world, Mr. Jocko Doyle!
269
00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:55,886
Here he is, ladies and gentlemen,
the greatest stuntman alive:
270
00:19:55,986 --> 00:19:59,265
Sonny Hooper
and his famous horse, Dancer!
271
00:19:59,365 --> 00:20:01,100
They've never let us down.
272
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,986
They've performed in every benefit
we've ever had.
273
00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:13,611
Whose damn truck is that
parked right in the middle of everything?
274
00:20:13,713 --> 00:20:15,740
That belongs to the kid.
275
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,242
Well, where is this hot kid
I've been hearing so much about?
276
00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:23,664
We better back up a little bit,
or he's gonna drop right on us.
277
00:20:23,764 --> 00:20:25,081
Oh, shit.
278
00:21:14,190 --> 00:21:16,092
Hey, not too shabby.
279
00:21:16,192 --> 00:21:19,595
The chariot race is coming up, kid.
Go put your Fruit of the Looms on.
280
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,762
I'm on my way.
281
00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:30,564
The chariot race is next.
This ought to be a wreck.
282
00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:34,199
- Who's racing against the kid?
- Hammerhead.
283
00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:36,903
Hammerhead?
284
00:21:37,171 --> 00:21:40,331
- How are you, Sonny?
- Hi, Hammerhead.
285
00:21:40,925 --> 00:21:42,576
What's the matter? What...?
286
00:21:42,676 --> 00:21:45,037
What are you looking at?
287
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:46,872
You've got a nice tush...
288
00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:49,875
but shouldn't you have something on
underneath this thing?
289
00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:52,586
- Like what?
- Like shorts.
290
00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:56,090
This is all they gave me.
And besides, I don't ever wear shorts.
291
00:21:56,190 --> 00:22:00,556
What if you have a wreck?
What if you turn over and it falls out?
292
00:22:01,237 --> 00:22:03,013
It ain't gonna fall out.
293
00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:05,766
Yeah, but what if it does?
What if it falls out?
294
00:22:05,866 --> 00:22:08,480
All the stunt guys
are gonna be embarrassed.
295
00:22:09,245 --> 00:22:12,982
I'll tell you what, you can go
to my trailer, get a pair of my shorts.
296
00:22:13,082 --> 00:22:16,485
You can put them on. I'll watch the team
for you while you're gone.
297
00:22:16,585 --> 00:22:18,778
Hey, thanks, Sonny.
298
00:22:18,879 --> 00:22:22,244
When I get done with the shorts,
I'll have them washed.
299
00:22:27,847 --> 00:22:29,957
Get ready for the chariot race, kids.
300
00:22:30,057 --> 00:22:32,796
Everybody will have
to pick your own hero.
301
00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:35,127
Hey, nice fall you did back there.
302
00:22:35,229 --> 00:22:36,839
I'll be. Sonny Hooper.
303
00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:40,258
- I've waited a year and a half to meet you.
- Oh, yeah?
304
00:22:40,985 --> 00:22:44,680
- What happened to Hammerhead?
- Oh, he was feeling poorly.
305
00:22:45,322 --> 00:22:47,481
Bad for him, good for me.
306
00:22:48,284 --> 00:22:51,312
- How's that?
- I get to perform with Sonny Hooper.
307
00:22:51,412 --> 00:22:52,813
Oh, hell, that ain't no big deal...
308
00:22:57,459 --> 00:22:59,401
Hyah! Hyah!
309
00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:01,824
Come on, baby!
310
00:23:22,151 --> 00:23:23,593
Come on!
311
00:23:30,367 --> 00:23:31,900
Move it!
312
00:23:40,377 --> 00:23:42,570
Whoa! Whoa!
313
00:24:08,489 --> 00:24:10,227
Wait a minute, Jimbo.
314
00:24:15,537 --> 00:24:18,856
Caca, Dancer. Caca, caca, caca.
315
00:24:25,506 --> 00:24:29,075
- Beautiful, wasn't it? Round and firm...
- Hey, let's go to the Palomino Club.
316
00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:31,787
Had a yellow streak
running through them.
317
00:24:31,887 --> 00:24:35,416
- Pretty good trick, Sonny.
- Kid, you know how to make an entrance.
318
00:24:35,516 --> 00:24:38,835
- I'm Jocko Doyle.
- Pleased to meet you, Mr. Doyle.
319
00:24:38,936 --> 00:24:41,547
I've studied just about everything
you've ever done.
320
00:24:41,647 --> 00:24:43,549
Well, that's back in the caveman days.
321
00:24:43,649 --> 00:24:46,760
- You looked good today. Didn't he look good?
- Yeah, he looked good.
322
00:24:46,860 --> 00:24:50,389
- Want to go to the Palomino Club?
- How far did you fall?
323
00:24:50,489 --> 00:24:53,642
- It was about 125 feet.
- What's the furthest I've ever fallen?
324
00:24:53,742 --> 00:24:57,812
- Oh, maybe 150 feet.
- No, I think it was about 85 feet.
325
00:24:57,913 --> 00:25:00,816
Wasn't it more like 75 in Bullet?
326
00:25:00,916 --> 00:25:03,569
Looks like he studied you too.
327
00:25:03,669 --> 00:25:05,532
We'd better go to the Palomino Club.
328
00:25:11,343 --> 00:25:13,581
Go ahead, Jimbo!
329
00:25:26,442 --> 00:25:28,384
I'm really dry!
330
00:25:32,656 --> 00:25:34,183
Hey, it's lonely!
331
00:25:34,283 --> 00:25:37,568
- We're coming over!
- Come on with that cerveza!
332
00:25:44,752 --> 00:25:48,405
Goddamn! That son of a bitch
didn't even say thank you!
333
00:25:48,505 --> 00:25:50,447
Where is that beer?
334
00:26:01,268 --> 00:26:02,710
Hey. Sonny!
335
00:26:02,811 --> 00:26:06,255
- Anybody in there need a beer?
- Jocko needs a beer.
336
00:26:06,356 --> 00:26:11,018
- My arms aren't long enough!
- That's no problem. Wait here.
337
00:26:27,711 --> 00:26:29,744
Pretty fancy!
338
00:26:33,592 --> 00:26:35,910
Let me see your license, please.
339
00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:50,634
- Shall I wait, officer?
- Yeah. No. Do whatever you want!
340
00:27:10,921 --> 00:27:13,364
Hey! What do you think you're doing?
341
00:27:14,216 --> 00:27:17,244
- We're just going backwards.
- Pull that thing over!
342
00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:20,247
- Do what?
- Right over there by the curb.
343
00:27:20,347 --> 00:27:21,999
Okay.
344
00:27:22,099 --> 00:27:24,376
I don't believe I was going over 55.
345
00:27:24,476 --> 00:27:26,962
You were going 55 backwards.
346
00:27:27,062 --> 00:27:30,591
- Well, that's not against the law, is it?
- Unsafe backing.
347
00:27:30,691 --> 00:27:33,930
- Silly law.
- It's still the law.
348
00:27:34,069 --> 00:27:36,762
- Sign here, please.
- All right.
349
00:27:39,825 --> 00:27:41,892
- Here's your license.
- Thank you.
350
00:27:43,287 --> 00:27:45,730
- Here's your ticket.
- See you around.
351
00:27:53,380 --> 00:27:54,990
Have a good trip!
352
00:27:55,090 --> 00:27:58,368
- Happy landings!
- Have a nice day, officer!
353
00:28:26,496 --> 00:28:28,899
Oh, would you move on over, Mama?
354
00:28:28,999 --> 00:28:32,034
Come on and make some room for me
355
00:28:32,961 --> 00:28:38,374
Jump in the back of my old Pontiac
And I'll drive you to Tennessee
356
00:28:39,051 --> 00:28:43,963
I'll push the pedal down to the floor
Turn the radio up all the way
357
00:28:45,182 --> 00:28:50,094
Keep this car in overdrive
And we'll let that rock 'n' roll play
358
00:28:50,771 --> 00:28:52,509
Go
359
00:28:57,903 --> 00:29:01,557
Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen.
We appreciate it. Thank you.
360
00:29:01,657 --> 00:29:05,852
We'll be right back. Stick around,
get drunk and be somebody. Thank you.
361
00:29:22,552 --> 00:29:26,121
It's called 75 in a second. And he says,
"Where's that damn dog now?"
362
00:29:26,223 --> 00:29:29,383
He's right alongside. He's:
363
00:29:30,310 --> 00:29:33,754
He said, "Well, shit, I'll just jam it."
And he just floors it!
364
00:29:35,023 --> 00:29:36,884
Will you shut up? I'm trying to tell...
365
00:29:36,984 --> 00:29:39,970
- That table sure is loud over there.
- Making a lot of noise.
366
00:29:40,070 --> 00:29:44,224
Old Blue's right alongside.
And this goddamn truck comes across.
367
00:29:44,324 --> 00:29:48,103
I got 50 cents in the jukebox. I can't hear it.
Let's go get our money's worth.
368
00:29:48,203 --> 00:29:51,898
The old man says, "Well, that's his asshole.
See, he ain't used to them quick stunts."
369
00:29:57,087 --> 00:29:59,029
Say, Granddad.
370
00:29:59,131 --> 00:30:03,952
Hey, Granddad, I got 50 cents in that jukebox,
and all I can hear is your mouth flapping.
371
00:30:04,052 --> 00:30:06,495
What'd you say, son? I'm a mite deaf.
372
00:30:06,596 --> 00:30:08,999
I said, I got 50 cents
in that jukebox...
373
00:30:09,099 --> 00:30:12,377
and all I can hear is your mouth flapping.
Did you hear that?
374
00:30:12,477 --> 00:30:15,964
- Now, we figure you owe us 50 cents.
- You guys from out of town?
375
00:30:16,064 --> 00:30:18,717
- Uh-huh. Houston.
- Oh, yeah? What are you doing here?
376
00:30:18,817 --> 00:30:22,429
- A convention.
- Convention? What kind of convention?
377
00:30:22,529 --> 00:30:23,595
Convention of assholes?
378
00:30:26,825 --> 00:30:29,937
- Ha-ha-ha. Thank you.
- A SWAT convention.
379
00:30:30,037 --> 00:30:31,228
Oh.
380
00:30:31,330 --> 00:30:32,689
A SWAT convention.
381
00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:36,108
A SWAT team?
They gonna swat flies? Ha-ha-ha.
382
00:30:36,209 --> 00:30:38,111
You know how to save a policeman
from drowning?
383
00:30:38,211 --> 00:30:39,277
- No.
- Good!
384
00:30:42,132 --> 00:30:43,949
What about my 50 cents?
385
00:30:46,511 --> 00:30:47,913
- Stanley!
- Yeah.
386
00:30:48,013 --> 00:30:50,627
- Can I borrow your hard hat?
- Sure.
387
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:57,300
I'll get you your 50 cents. Excuse me.
388
00:30:59,358 --> 00:31:02,427
Looks like a job for the Golden Helmet.
389
00:31:25,217 --> 00:31:29,079
Well, if you wanted to make somebody
look like an asshole, boy, you sure did.
390
00:31:29,179 --> 00:31:30,962
That was you.
391
00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:38,012
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven,
eight, nine, 10, 11, 12.
392
00:31:39,356 --> 00:31:40,798
Six against 12.
393
00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:43,763
Seven.
394
00:31:45,195 --> 00:31:46,722
Seven against 12.
395
00:31:46,822 --> 00:31:48,473
Well...
396
00:31:48,573 --> 00:31:50,684
looks like it's a little uneven.
397
00:31:50,784 --> 00:31:53,352
You guys will have to go back to Houston
and get some more guys.
398
00:32:15,058 --> 00:32:17,217
We may be in trouble.
399
00:32:23,775 --> 00:32:26,138
We are definitely in trouble.
400
00:32:39,875 --> 00:32:42,614
Holy shit! A fight!
401
00:32:43,336 --> 00:32:45,199
What's that?
402
00:32:45,755 --> 00:32:47,663
Wait, wait, wait.
403
00:32:58,810 --> 00:33:01,046
Give me a hand, will you?
404
00:33:01,146 --> 00:33:03,305
Cute. Really cute.
405
00:33:04,649 --> 00:33:06,557
Oh, how rude!
406
00:33:07,110 --> 00:33:09,052
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
407
00:33:11,531 --> 00:33:14,065
Look out now! Oh!
408
00:33:14,743 --> 00:33:17,311
We're getting a little old
for this shit, ain't we?
409
00:33:17,412 --> 00:33:19,900
That's right.
Let's go get some sexy... Ooh!
410
00:33:35,764 --> 00:33:39,376
Listen, fudge nuts, you ain't
ever gonna learn, are you, dummy?
411
00:33:39,476 --> 00:33:43,088
Willard! Jeffrey!
Get this son of a bitch!
412
00:33:53,114 --> 00:33:57,776
It's a bird! It's a plane!
It's Super Hooper!
413
00:34:23,353 --> 00:34:25,921
Oh, well. Another night, no profits.
414
00:34:26,022 --> 00:34:28,508
Huell! Get out there and stop that.
415
00:34:28,608 --> 00:34:30,596
- Yes, ma'am. You bet.
- Get them, Huell!
416
00:34:34,781 --> 00:34:37,770
Bouncers! Throw them out.
417
00:34:52,215 --> 00:34:55,744
God dang! Isn't that fun?
Ha-ha-ha. Whoo!
418
00:34:55,844 --> 00:34:57,746
- Let's go back in!
- Are you crazy?
419
00:34:57,846 --> 00:35:01,461
- Let's just talk about it a minute.
- Oh, what are you talking about?
420
00:35:08,023 --> 00:35:10,926
You were really graceful
in there tonight, kid.
421
00:35:11,026 --> 00:35:13,093
Where'd you learn to fight like that?
422
00:35:13,194 --> 00:35:15,762
- Ha-ha-ha.
- I was on the Olympic boxing team.
423
00:35:15,864 --> 00:35:18,391
I'll show you how to throw
a man out of here!
424
00:35:18,491 --> 00:35:21,184
I've been getting thrown
out of here since... Aah!
425
00:35:21,286 --> 00:35:23,396
...before you were goddamn born!
426
00:35:23,496 --> 00:35:25,780
All right, all right.
427
00:35:26,541 --> 00:35:29,444
These fights ain't worth a shit anymore.
428
00:35:29,544 --> 00:35:31,577
Kid, what's your name?
429
00:35:32,672 --> 00:35:34,824
Delmore Shidski.
430
00:35:34,924 --> 00:35:37,410
- What's that last name again?
- Shidski.
431
00:35:37,510 --> 00:35:41,498
- How do you spell that?
- Are you kidding me?
432
00:35:41,598 --> 00:35:44,291
- Huh? S-H-I-D...
- S-K-I.
433
00:35:44,392 --> 00:35:46,002
Well, we'll just call him Ski.
434
00:35:46,102 --> 00:35:50,297
Hey, the night's too quiet
and it's too young to quit!
435
00:35:53,193 --> 00:35:55,636
It is too damn mean in there.
436
00:35:55,737 --> 00:35:59,140
Let's go someplace else.
Let's go get some loving.
437
00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:01,977
- Thanks a lot, Tim. All right.
- Catch you next time.
438
00:36:02,077 --> 00:36:04,104
Shit. That wasn't any kind of fight.
439
00:36:04,204 --> 00:36:07,107
Let's go on up to the ranch
and show them your stunt reels.
440
00:36:07,207 --> 00:36:08,694
Hey, pretty!
441
00:36:09,459 --> 00:36:12,195
- Yeah. Would you like to see it?
- Yeah, I would.
442
00:36:12,295 --> 00:36:15,198
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
Wait a minute!
443
00:36:18,510 --> 00:36:21,078
Wait a minute! It's 1:30 in the morning!
444
00:36:21,179 --> 00:36:24,541
You whip up some eggs for the guys
and we'll have a little party.
445
00:36:24,641 --> 00:36:27,752
We'll just drink. What the hell.
We're gonna have a party at my house.
446
00:37:23,992 --> 00:37:25,769
It always leaves them speechless.
447
00:37:28,705 --> 00:37:30,732
- That was great, Sonny.
- Thank you.
448
00:37:30,832 --> 00:37:33,234
Looks like you've done
every gag there ever was.
449
00:37:33,334 --> 00:37:35,487
Well...
450
00:37:35,587 --> 00:37:39,247
- me and Jocko...
- Yeah! Believe I will.
451
00:37:40,550 --> 00:37:44,454
Me and Jocko, we...
We never turned down a stunt.
452
00:37:44,554 --> 00:37:46,166
No.
453
00:37:46,639 --> 00:37:48,627
Never turned down a gag.
454
00:37:49,476 --> 00:37:51,753
I had it in my will once...
455
00:37:53,021 --> 00:37:56,215
- ...I thought I was gonna, uh...
- Die.
456
00:37:56,316 --> 00:38:00,636
I'd have something to leave,
and I put it in the will. I said...
457
00:38:00,737 --> 00:38:03,348
I wanted it on the cement,
on the thing...
458
00:38:03,448 --> 00:38:05,390
- Tombstone.
- Tombstone!
459
00:38:05,492 --> 00:38:08,310
"Jocko Doyle never turned down a gag."
See?
460
00:38:09,579 --> 00:38:11,396
- Perfect.
- That was... Been a hell of an idea.
461
00:38:11,498 --> 00:38:12,857
Perfect, perfect, perfect.
462
00:38:14,501 --> 00:38:16,443
Once I turned down...
463
00:38:16,544 --> 00:38:18,987
What I did turn down
was everything else...
464
00:38:19,088 --> 00:38:23,454
but then, shit,
gotta keep the good times rolling.
465
00:38:26,137 --> 00:38:28,915
Is that why you did it all?
Because of the good times?
466
00:38:29,015 --> 00:38:32,794
Well, you don't wanna knock
good times, kid. I mean...
467
00:38:32,894 --> 00:38:35,337
I get so damn old, I'm just...
468
00:38:35,438 --> 00:38:39,508
sitting in my rocking chair on a porch,
I wanna have same nice memories.
469
00:38:39,609 --> 00:38:42,302
What the hell else is there?
470
00:38:42,403 --> 00:38:44,846
I don't know, just, uh...
471
00:38:44,948 --> 00:38:47,766
Maybe prove certain things
can be done or that...
472
00:38:47,867 --> 00:38:50,145
a man can do just about anything
he puts his mind to.
473
00:38:52,539 --> 00:38:54,481
That is too deep for me.
474
00:38:54,582 --> 00:38:59,198
Sun! The sun's come up! It's daylight!
475
00:39:17,105 --> 00:39:19,423
- Hey.
- Mm.
476
00:39:19,524 --> 00:39:23,011
You ought to drink more.
Nothing hurts when you're numb.
477
00:39:28,157 --> 00:39:32,187
- Where's the kid?
- He's standing in there...
478
00:39:32,287 --> 00:39:35,982
staring avariciously
into your trophy case...
479
00:39:36,082 --> 00:39:38,525
little trickles of slobber
running down here.
480
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:48,244
It's so goddamn funny. You weren't
a hell of a lot different a few years ago.
481
00:39:48,344 --> 00:39:50,161
- Twenty years ago.
- Twenty years ago.
482
00:39:52,140 --> 00:39:55,001
Your little eyes were spinning around,
beady...
483
00:39:55,101 --> 00:39:57,086
looking for fame and fortune.
484
00:39:57,186 --> 00:39:59,629
- Shit.
- Ha-ha-ha.
485
00:40:00,607 --> 00:40:05,678
And I know damn well too.
I was sitting there making $20,000 a year...
486
00:40:05,778 --> 00:40:08,431
as the top dog around this place.
487
00:40:08,531 --> 00:40:12,143
Every time I look over my shoulder,
there you are jumping up and down...
488
00:40:12,243 --> 00:40:15,730
figuring out some way
you can top whatever gag I did.
489
00:40:15,830 --> 00:40:18,483
- Well?
- Well?
490
00:40:18,583 --> 00:40:19,984
Well, you gonna marry my daughter?
491
00:40:20,084 --> 00:40:26,574
Oh. Goddamn, Jocko. I was married once.
You know that. It was a disaster. I...
492
00:40:26,674 --> 00:40:31,620
I felt like a failure, you know?
I'm scared to death of marriage.
493
00:40:31,721 --> 00:40:35,333
Besides that,
nobody's getting married today anyway.
494
00:40:35,433 --> 00:40:38,251
- Who ain't getting married?
- Nobody's getting married!
495
00:40:38,353 --> 00:40:41,840
Name me somebody that ain't getting married.
Name me two people.
496
00:40:41,940 --> 00:40:43,675
Everybody's... People getting...
497
00:40:43,775 --> 00:40:46,010
Faggots are getting married,
for chrissake.
498
00:40:46,110 --> 00:40:48,894
What the hell do you mean,
nobody's getting married? Eh.
499
00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:51,266
I love her, Jocko...
500
00:40:51,366 --> 00:40:53,684
but I gotta do things in my own time.
501
00:40:53,785 --> 00:40:56,813
- You're a horny son of a bitch.
- I gotta do things my own way.
502
00:40:56,913 --> 00:40:59,065
Yeah, well, that's what I done, see?
503
00:40:59,165 --> 00:41:03,736
In my time, my way.
I wasn't even home when she was born.
504
00:41:05,213 --> 00:41:06,655
Listen, you.
505
00:41:07,674 --> 00:41:10,159
Didn't you ever want that?
506
00:41:10,259 --> 00:41:16,798
Haven't you ever been with Gwen
when you wanted to have a baby? Huh?
507
00:41:17,141 --> 00:41:20,128
Did you ever have that feeling?
508
00:41:20,228 --> 00:41:22,091
All the time, Jocko.
509
00:41:23,106 --> 00:41:24,923
All the time.
510
00:41:25,191 --> 00:41:27,093
Listen, Roger, we gotta have a talk.
511
00:41:27,193 --> 00:41:29,304
The studio's bugging me
about the budget.
512
00:41:29,404 --> 00:41:30,470
Later, Max.
513
00:41:30,571 --> 00:41:35,016
I've got to get this first shot.
Tony, let's set up this first one, okay?
514
00:41:35,118 --> 00:41:36,435
Listen, Roger.
515
00:41:37,662 --> 00:41:39,314
Medic!
516
00:41:39,414 --> 00:41:41,356
Oh. Thank you, my love.
517
00:41:45,169 --> 00:41:46,446
Ah! Thank you.
518
00:41:46,546 --> 00:41:48,281
- Good morning, Mr. Berns.
- Hi, Max.
519
00:41:48,381 --> 00:41:51,199
- Why, that punk. Who? Roger.
- Who?
520
00:41:51,300 --> 00:41:54,412
If his last picture hadn't grossed
$100 million, I'd kick his ass.
521
00:41:54,512 --> 00:41:57,415
Do it! We've been waiting for months
for you to kick his ass.
522
00:41:57,515 --> 00:41:59,125
You guys look like garbage.
523
00:41:59,225 --> 00:42:01,836
You should see through my eyes.
It's Metrocolor.
524
00:42:01,936 --> 00:42:05,130
I've just got a little headache.
You think we're bad, you should see...!
525
00:42:05,231 --> 00:42:06,673
Don't yell in my ear. Jesus Christ!
526
00:42:08,234 --> 00:42:09,300
What the hell is that?
527
00:42:10,737 --> 00:42:12,930
Look what's coming.
528
00:42:13,614 --> 00:42:17,058
Stop that thing! Shoot it! Kill it!
529
00:42:17,160 --> 00:42:20,313
- Want some breakfast?
- Oh! God. Get that circumcised, will you?
530
00:42:20,413 --> 00:42:24,108
- What are you doing here? What?
- Reporting for work.
531
00:42:24,208 --> 00:42:26,569
- Reporting for work.
- To work?
532
00:42:26,669 --> 00:42:28,987
Yeah. You told me last night
to come to work.
533
00:42:29,088 --> 00:42:31,656
- Did I do that?
- I don't remember that.
534
00:42:31,758 --> 00:42:34,661
- Oh.
- You were pretty bombed. Want me to leave?
535
00:42:34,761 --> 00:42:38,456
No. No, I don't want you to leave.
We'll find you some work.
536
00:42:38,556 --> 00:42:40,583
All right, everybody's ready now.
537
00:42:40,683 --> 00:42:42,876
- Roll the cameras.
- Cameras ready.
538
00:42:42,977 --> 00:42:45,420
- Marking able.
- And maker.
539
00:42:45,521 --> 00:42:46,923
All right, background! Action!
540
00:42:57,075 --> 00:42:58,767
Cut it! Cut it!
541
00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:06,900
Okay?
542
00:43:07,001 --> 00:43:09,194
Didn't do a thing for me, Hooper.
543
00:43:09,295 --> 00:43:10,947
Missed by a mile.
544
00:43:11,047 --> 00:43:13,240
Boring, boring, boring.
545
00:43:13,341 --> 00:43:16,910
I'm not a mind reader, Roger.
If you tell me what you want, I'll do it.
546
00:43:17,011 --> 00:43:19,747
Look, you're the stunt gaffer, so gaff.
547
00:43:19,847 --> 00:43:22,791
I've got an idea.
Would take some time, though.
548
00:43:22,892 --> 00:43:26,587
- Who are you?
- He's a new man. Ski. He's a good man.
549
00:43:26,687 --> 00:43:29,175
Anything will be better than that,
so let's try one.
550
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:33,510
Thanks to the kid here, the Polack, we have
to sit around waiting for night to shoot.
551
00:43:35,738 --> 00:43:38,056
Gives me time to get over my hangover.
552
00:43:38,157 --> 00:43:39,809
Guys, it's Roger's birthday.
553
00:43:39,909 --> 00:43:41,942
Oh.
554
00:43:42,703 --> 00:43:45,772
I thought maybe we could all think
of something to give him?
555
00:43:45,873 --> 00:43:46,983
How about VD?
556
00:43:48,501 --> 00:43:52,739
Oh, I got an idea. I know something perfect
for him. Everybody cough up a little money.
557
00:43:52,839 --> 00:43:55,532
Happy birthday, Roger
558
00:43:55,633 --> 00:43:58,995
Watch your feet, guys.
559
00:43:59,095 --> 00:44:03,833
Well, what more can I say?
I'm very, very touched, and thank you.
560
00:44:11,607 --> 00:44:15,386
This fire scene is very dangerous.
We want everybody on their toes.
561
00:44:15,486 --> 00:44:17,472
We don't want anybody hurt.
562
00:44:17,572 --> 00:44:19,182
Okay, action!
563
00:44:19,282 --> 00:44:22,018
- Remember, that's gasoline in there, Sonny.
- Right.
564
00:44:22,118 --> 00:44:24,729
- Be careful.
- Bless your cock.
565
00:44:51,272 --> 00:44:52,632
Hello, gorgeous.
566
00:44:52,732 --> 00:44:56,597
- Sonny, will you get me out of here?
- You bet your sweet bippy.
567
00:44:57,653 --> 00:44:59,971
- Sonny, will you get serious!
- No time for that.
568
00:45:02,825 --> 00:45:06,190
Are they okay?
I can't see through the flame.
569
00:45:09,790 --> 00:45:11,232
Cut it! Cut it!
570
00:45:11,334 --> 00:45:14,320
Are you guys waiting for an invitation
to put that fire out?
571
00:45:14,420 --> 00:45:15,571
L.A.'s got enough smog.
572
00:45:15,671 --> 00:45:17,363
Oh.
573
00:45:17,506 --> 00:45:20,618
You know, Sonny, I love stuntmen.
574
00:45:20,718 --> 00:45:24,872
Let's get that fire out.
I want everybody to stay back here.
575
00:45:24,972 --> 00:45:28,041
- Don't get near those flames.
- Tony.
576
00:45:28,142 --> 00:45:30,630
Get Hooper over here for me, will you?
577
00:45:43,866 --> 00:45:46,644
Uh, Hooper,
that bit at the complex tomorrow...
578
00:45:46,744 --> 00:45:49,272
- ...who's set for it?
- Bobby Bass.
579
00:45:49,372 --> 00:45:52,737
Hmm. Would you mind
if Ski did it instead?
580
00:45:53,584 --> 00:45:55,486
Yes, I would mind, Roger. Uh...
581
00:45:55,586 --> 00:45:57,864
I'm the stunt coordinator
on this picture...
582
00:45:57,964 --> 00:46:00,407
and I say who does
and who doesn't do the stunts.
583
00:46:00,508 --> 00:46:02,291
And I'd like Bobby Bass.
584
00:46:02,593 --> 00:46:06,538
Hmm. Well, I don't want to infringe
on your authority...
585
00:46:06,639 --> 00:46:11,380
but I really would like Ski
to do that gag, okay?
586
00:46:22,863 --> 00:46:24,223
Six-three, Louis.
587
00:46:24,323 --> 00:46:27,560
Okay, everybody, we're ready
to make one. Roll the cameras!
588
00:46:27,660 --> 00:46:29,443
Speed! A camera.
589
00:46:30,579 --> 00:46:32,521
Baker!
590
00:46:34,417 --> 00:46:36,029
Action!
591
00:46:45,469 --> 00:46:48,287
Cut it!
Bring the stuntman out here, please.
592
00:46:49,849 --> 00:46:52,337
Great, Kent!
Go downstairs, relax. Wonderful.
593
00:46:52,810 --> 00:46:54,837
Hey, good luck, Ski.
594
00:46:54,937 --> 00:46:58,549
All right, you gotta make him look good.
Okay? All the preparation you need.
595
00:46:58,649 --> 00:47:01,638
- We'll go down and set up the cameras.
- You got it.
596
00:47:03,404 --> 00:47:07,975
All right, people, we're in the wrong place.
Now move it all downstairs.
597
00:47:08,075 --> 00:47:10,108
Let's go! Let's move it!
598
00:47:12,413 --> 00:47:14,649
You ready, Ski?
599
00:47:14,749 --> 00:47:16,737
He'll be ready in a second.
600
00:47:22,631 --> 00:47:24,492
Tony, he's ready!
601
00:47:24,592 --> 00:47:26,159
- Roll the cameras!
- Speed!
602
00:47:26,260 --> 00:47:28,168
B camera marker.
603
00:47:28,679 --> 00:47:30,667
Come on, good buddy.
604
00:47:40,608 --> 00:47:42,801
Not too shabby.
605
00:47:42,902 --> 00:47:44,810
No, that's pretty good.
606
00:47:45,404 --> 00:47:47,765
We could've done that
when we were his age...
607
00:47:47,865 --> 00:47:50,479
except they didn't have
buildings that tall.
608
00:48:11,138 --> 00:48:13,124
Cut it! Cut it!
609
00:48:16,644 --> 00:48:19,087
You have to admit he's pretty damn good.
610
00:48:19,188 --> 00:48:21,756
- Yeah, I have to admit it.
- Pretty damn young too.
611
00:48:21,857 --> 00:48:24,218
Yeah, I hate him. I just hate him.
612
00:48:25,778 --> 00:48:27,470
- Handsome little shit.
- Ugh.
613
00:48:28,072 --> 00:48:29,810
Well?
614
00:48:31,575 --> 00:48:33,517
I thought it was a little slow.
615
00:48:33,619 --> 00:48:38,155
If you don't mind, uh,
I'd like to have another one. Okay?
616
00:48:38,749 --> 00:48:40,191
Are you kidding me?
617
00:48:40,668 --> 00:48:42,069
Yeah, I'm kidding.
618
00:48:44,338 --> 00:48:47,031
Come around tomorrow.
I'll show you how an old man does it.
619
00:49:43,147 --> 00:49:45,715
- Here you go, Sonny.
- Thanks, Don.
620
00:49:59,079 --> 00:50:00,940
We're all ready, Hooper.
621
00:50:01,040 --> 00:50:04,530
A little air in the air bag would help,
numb-nuts.
622
00:50:05,711 --> 00:50:07,321
Get that filled up!
623
00:50:07,421 --> 00:50:08,908
Sonny!
624
00:50:09,381 --> 00:50:11,492
- Are you crazy? Huh?
- What?
625
00:50:11,592 --> 00:50:14,620
- I just talked to that helicopter pilot.
- So?
626
00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:16,787
Well, how high are you gonna drop?
627
00:50:16,889 --> 00:50:19,917
- What's the world record?
- Two twenty-three.
628
00:50:20,017 --> 00:50:22,005
I'll go 224.
629
00:50:43,415 --> 00:50:44,732
Roll the cameras!
630
00:50:44,833 --> 00:50:46,400
Action!
631
00:51:04,103 --> 00:51:05,713
Pull me in, Jeffrey! Pull me in!
632
00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:10,432
Whoa.
633
00:51:12,528 --> 00:51:16,056
I hope nothing happens to this dinner jacket.
Man, I want to keep this.
634
00:51:16,156 --> 00:51:19,018
- Whoo! You look like a head waiter.
- I am.
635
00:52:02,620 --> 00:52:03,937
Geronimo!
636
00:52:32,274 --> 00:52:34,842
You've got another world record
for your books, buddy.
637
00:52:34,943 --> 00:52:37,054
How about a can of Coors? Huh?
638
00:52:37,154 --> 00:52:39,431
Sonny, you can jump
on my mattress any time.
639
00:52:39,531 --> 00:52:41,392
- Fantastic.
- You're great, Sonny.
640
00:52:41,492 --> 00:52:43,477
- Terrific, Sonny.
- Hooper, it was nice.
641
00:52:43,577 --> 00:52:45,895
- You're through for the day.
- I'm proud of you.
642
00:52:45,996 --> 00:52:48,814
I bet that air bag didn't look that...
643
00:52:48,916 --> 00:52:53,157
Without causing any commotion,
I want to go see the doctor.
644
00:52:53,420 --> 00:52:55,281
About the same thing. Another tropism.
645
00:52:55,381 --> 00:52:58,284
We've got a coronal-facing here
and another sagittal-facing here...
646
00:52:58,384 --> 00:53:00,619
two areas of instability...
647
00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:03,831
within the space of around two
or three lumbar vertebrae.
648
00:53:03,931 --> 00:53:07,585
Now, if we go over here, as you can see,
this is the articulating facet.
649
00:53:07,685 --> 00:53:11,714
This is a coronal-facing here,
and this is a sagittal-facing over here.
650
00:53:11,814 --> 00:53:14,717
This gives a very unstable
low-back condition.
651
00:53:14,817 --> 00:53:16,468
How's my cockus erectus?
652
00:53:16,568 --> 00:53:19,512
- If you'll hold on to it
for a minute, I'll finish. - Fine.
653
00:53:19,613 --> 00:53:25,481
All of these conditions make it look like
you're having a preosteoporotic condition.
654
00:53:27,579 --> 00:53:30,983
Frankly, Sonny,
it doesn't look too promising.
655
00:53:31,083 --> 00:53:35,528
Hell, I thought I had a problem till you
explained it. Now I'm not worried anymore.
656
00:53:35,629 --> 00:53:38,157
Christ, I was really proud
of that operation.
657
00:53:38,257 --> 00:53:40,950
The average person,
it would have lasted them for a lifetime.
658
00:53:41,051 --> 00:53:42,993
- Hmm.
- But not with you.
659
00:53:43,095 --> 00:53:44,997
Why do you keep on screwing up
all my good work?
660
00:53:45,097 --> 00:53:47,290
Ha, ha. You should be paying me.
661
00:53:47,391 --> 00:53:50,669
Half of what you know you learned
from wiring me together.
662
00:53:50,769 --> 00:53:52,586
What have you got, a death wish?
663
00:53:52,688 --> 00:53:55,716
Look who's talking.
These things are nails in your coffin.
664
00:53:55,816 --> 00:53:57,551
- Jesus.
- I'm cutting way down.
665
00:53:57,651 --> 00:53:59,762
Ha-ha-ha. I hope so.
666
00:53:59,862 --> 00:54:01,764
- Look, Sonny, I'm serious.
- Good.
667
00:54:01,864 --> 00:54:04,391
You can't keep bashing your backbone...
668
00:54:04,491 --> 00:54:07,309
and expect to go walking around
like a normal person.
669
00:54:07,411 --> 00:54:10,689
Listen, I can handle it. I'm a tough guy.
You know what I mean?
670
00:54:10,789 --> 00:54:13,778
Give it to me, sweetheart.
Don't pull any punches.
671
00:54:14,334 --> 00:54:16,111
The kid can take it.
672
00:54:16,211 --> 00:54:19,530
The kid could take it.
Only you're not a kid any longer.
673
00:54:19,631 --> 00:54:23,118
- Look, heh, I'm gonna level with you.
- Hmm?
674
00:54:23,218 --> 00:54:25,371
- One good impact here...
- Ow.
675
00:54:25,471 --> 00:54:27,456
...you understand?
You're gonna be paralyzed.
676
00:54:27,556 --> 00:54:30,420
From the neck down, nothing moves.
677
00:54:32,144 --> 00:54:35,088
- Nothing?
- Heh. Yeah, even your ding-dong.
678
00:54:35,189 --> 00:54:37,382
- My ding-dong.
- Heh.
679
00:54:37,483 --> 00:54:40,636
Look, Sonny, I'm not saying it'll happen,
but you could die.
680
00:54:40,736 --> 00:54:43,930
Well, if my ding-dong ain't gonna work,
I don't wanna live.
681
00:54:44,031 --> 00:54:46,266
All right. But the odds are against you.
682
00:54:46,366 --> 00:54:50,026
If you were a horse, I'd shoot you.
683
00:54:53,499 --> 00:54:55,612
I bet a big five.
684
00:54:57,002 --> 00:54:58,612
- "El foldo."
- El foldo.
685
00:54:58,712 --> 00:55:00,989
Star, el foldo. El foldo.
686
00:55:01,089 --> 00:55:03,373
I'll see it. And here come the biggies.
687
00:55:03,842 --> 00:55:05,159
Screw the biggies.
688
00:55:05,260 --> 00:55:08,163
Wait a minute. You can't use that thing.
What is that?
689
00:55:08,263 --> 00:55:11,707
- It's my pocket computer.
- You can't use a computer. You can't use that.
690
00:55:11,809 --> 00:55:15,048
Show me where it says I can't,
and I'll put it up.
691
00:55:15,312 --> 00:55:18,841
All right. I'll see your five
and I'll raise you five.
692
00:55:18,941 --> 00:55:22,510
Uh, I'll just use
my manually operated poker sense...
693
00:55:22,611 --> 00:55:24,929
against your mechanical wizardry.
694
00:55:25,030 --> 00:55:27,683
And I'll bump you a quarter.
695
00:55:27,783 --> 00:55:29,475
- High roller, huh?
- Mm-hm.
696
00:55:29,576 --> 00:55:31,109
Look at that, gang.
697
00:55:32,621 --> 00:55:34,188
Who is that guy?
698
00:55:34,289 --> 00:55:37,233
- That's the writer. Heh.
- Well, he looks a little miffed.
699
00:55:51,723 --> 00:55:55,586
- You think Roger didn't like his script?
- I think so. Ha-ha-ha.
700
00:55:55,686 --> 00:55:57,253
- What do you got?
- Pair of fours.
701
00:55:57,354 --> 00:55:59,638
- Pair of sevens.
- Ha-ha-ha.
702
00:56:00,274 --> 00:56:02,676
Sevens. Three aces. Ha-ha-ha.
703
00:56:02,776 --> 00:56:05,594
- It was a calculated risk.
- So was the Edsel. Ha-ha-ha.
704
00:56:05,696 --> 00:56:09,891
- Like to sit in for a hand, Mr. Berns?
- Thanks, Cully, but I'm not in the mood.
705
00:56:09,992 --> 00:56:13,020
- Well, you characters, you did it this time.
- How's that?
706
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:16,982
Roger. You got him so excited
he's rewriting the script...
707
00:56:17,082 --> 00:56:19,400
putting a whole bunch
of new gags in for you.
708
00:56:19,501 --> 00:56:21,904
What, he want us to blow up L.A.?
709
00:56:22,004 --> 00:56:24,822
No joke. The writer was a little upset,
as you may have noticed.
710
00:56:24,923 --> 00:56:26,784
Yeah, we noticed.
711
00:56:26,884 --> 00:56:30,662
And the studio is backing him all the way.
They say it's his ball game.
712
00:56:30,762 --> 00:56:34,500
So tomorrow morning
at 8:00, on Stage 6...
713
00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:39,254
he's having a meeting with you fellas,
and he's gonna show you a new ending.
714
00:56:39,354 --> 00:56:41,340
The biggest earthquake ever.
715
00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:43,801
You guys are trying to drive to safety.
716
00:56:43,901 --> 00:56:47,554
The first thing we'll do is collapse
this building into a giant crevice.
717
00:56:47,654 --> 00:56:49,096
Giant crevice.
718
00:56:49,197 --> 00:56:52,516
You're driving through explosions,
bodies flying everywhere, fire...
719
00:56:52,618 --> 00:56:56,938
You're just about to reach safety when bam!
We blow the bridge.
720
00:56:57,039 --> 00:56:59,732
And you fellas will have to rappel down
into the gorge...
721
00:56:59,833 --> 00:57:01,900
There'll be a lot of fire and smoke
and explosions.
722
00:57:02,002 --> 00:57:03,819
...up the other side to safety.
723
00:57:03,921 --> 00:57:06,323
- All in one shot?
- All in one shot.
724
00:57:06,423 --> 00:57:09,284
Flames, explosions, death. Everything.
725
00:57:09,384 --> 00:57:12,746
And you guys leaping out of it to triumph.
Isn't it a great idea?
726
00:57:12,846 --> 00:57:14,788
It's a great idea, Roger.
727
00:57:14,890 --> 00:57:16,832
I can't imagine anything better.
728
00:57:16,934 --> 00:57:18,501
Why not jump a car over the gorge?
729
00:57:18,602 --> 00:57:21,463
Aw, Ski, will you knock it off
with the jokes?
730
00:57:21,563 --> 00:57:23,841
No, no, no. What do you mean, Ski?
731
00:57:23,941 --> 00:57:27,556
Well, you'd have the biggest,
best car stunt ever done.
732
00:57:32,074 --> 00:57:35,185
What kind of car
could leap a gorge that wide?
733
00:57:35,285 --> 00:57:38,272
- A rocket car could make it.
- Well, I don't like it.
734
00:57:38,372 --> 00:57:40,314
What if you don't make it?
735
00:57:40,415 --> 00:57:42,901
- Cliff?
- They could make it, couldn't they?
736
00:57:43,001 --> 00:57:45,319
Sure, they could make it!
737
00:57:45,921 --> 00:57:47,238
Cliff...
738
00:57:47,339 --> 00:57:49,992
what's the longest jump
a rocket car's ever made?
739
00:57:50,092 --> 00:57:52,578
Buddy Joe took one 187 feet once.
740
00:57:52,678 --> 00:57:56,206
- How far is this?
- Three hundred and twenty-five feet.
741
00:57:56,306 --> 00:57:58,792
Could you beef up the suspension?
742
00:57:58,892 --> 00:58:03,963
Build a cage strong enough to protect Ski
and I when we landed on the other side?
743
00:58:04,064 --> 00:58:07,258
I could build a car like that,
but I can't tell how it would land.
744
00:58:07,359 --> 00:58:11,429
- That's 325 feet, Sonny.
- I know how far it is, Cliff.
745
00:58:13,240 --> 00:58:17,269
- Hell. It'd be a new world record.
- Wouldn't do my reputation any harm.
746
00:58:17,369 --> 00:58:19,229
Sonny, think of the risk.
747
00:58:19,329 --> 00:58:23,149
Forget about the risk, Max.
Just bring your checkbook.
748
00:58:23,250 --> 00:58:24,902
- Hooper?
- Huh?
749
00:58:25,002 --> 00:58:27,240
What's your fee for a gag like that?
750
00:58:28,588 --> 00:58:30,246
A hundred thousand dollars.
751
00:58:31,425 --> 00:58:33,993
Fifty thousand dollars for Ski...
752
00:58:34,094 --> 00:58:35,954
$50,000 for me.
753
00:58:36,054 --> 00:58:38,668
It's the world's biggest stunt.
754
00:58:39,558 --> 00:58:42,342
It ought to have
the world's biggest paycheck.
755
00:58:44,062 --> 00:58:48,216
Look, will you boys wait over there for
a minute? I want to discuss this with Roger.
756
00:58:48,316 --> 00:58:50,052
Of course, of course.
757
00:58:50,152 --> 00:58:51,428
You can do it, Cliff.
758
00:58:51,528 --> 00:58:55,348
Build a strong enough cage
so when we land on the other side...
759
00:58:55,449 --> 00:58:57,100
Roger...
760
00:58:57,200 --> 00:58:59,937
you know how much
over the budget we are.
761
00:59:00,037 --> 00:59:03,231
I want it, Max.
It's right, and I want it.
762
00:59:03,331 --> 00:59:05,945
It's a stunt that's never been done.
763
00:59:06,835 --> 00:59:09,571
And what if they don't make it, Roger?
764
00:59:09,671 --> 00:59:13,240
- Are you gonna be responsible for it?
- I don't care. I want it.
765
00:59:13,341 --> 00:59:16,078
It's the ending I want.
It's the statement I want to make.
766
00:59:16,178 --> 00:59:19,292
Cut something else if you have to.
I want that stunt.
767
00:59:20,223 --> 00:59:22,040
All right, Roger.
768
00:59:23,643 --> 00:59:26,755
I'll talk to Sonny,
see if I can't get his price down.
769
00:59:26,855 --> 00:59:30,133
No offense, Max,
but I don't think you could.
770
00:59:30,233 --> 00:59:32,386
Hooper knows you too well.
771
00:59:32,486 --> 00:59:35,805
Tony will get him down. Won't you, Tony?
772
00:59:35,906 --> 00:59:37,848
It'll be a pleasure.
773
00:59:38,116 --> 00:59:41,728
I drove this sucker the other day
and it hauls ass. What'd you do to it?
774
00:59:41,828 --> 00:59:45,691
I put a 428 police interceptor in it.
Balanced and blueprinted.
775
00:59:45,791 --> 00:59:48,902
- It's plenty hot.
- If it's that hot, I could use it Friday night.
776
00:59:49,002 --> 00:59:51,363
- Listen up, listen up. Lead heads!
- What?
777
00:59:51,463 --> 00:59:54,281
- Any of you guys seen Hooper?
- Down here, short legs.
778
00:59:54,382 --> 00:59:55,699
- Hooper.
- Yeah?
779
00:59:55,801 --> 00:59:59,587
- Can I talk to you for a second?
- Step in my office.
780
01:00:00,764 --> 01:00:04,376
Look, that gag you guys came up
with this morning...
781
01:00:04,476 --> 01:00:06,919
100,000 is way out of line.
782
01:00:07,020 --> 01:00:09,588
Mm-hm. Well, that's my price.
It's not negotiable.
783
01:00:09,689 --> 01:00:12,801
Heh. Everything is negotiable, Hooper.
784
01:00:12,901 --> 01:00:17,431
I know you're making big noises
just to jack up your fee, but here it is.
785
01:00:17,531 --> 01:00:19,808
Twenty grand for the jump.
786
01:00:19,908 --> 01:00:25,188
Because when you get right down to it,
that's all this is: just another car jump.
787
01:00:25,288 --> 01:00:26,354
Really?
788
01:00:33,797 --> 01:00:35,739
Better fasten your seat belt.
789
01:00:36,091 --> 01:00:37,617
What the hell are you doing?
790
01:00:37,717 --> 01:00:41,082
I'm just thinking over your offer.
I think better when I'm driving.
791
01:00:44,391 --> 01:00:46,879
Hooper, don't get excited.
Maybe we can compromise.
792
01:00:50,605 --> 01:00:52,090
I never compromise.
793
01:00:52,190 --> 01:00:55,805
Life is too short. So are you.
794
01:01:01,116 --> 01:01:04,276
- Maybe we got off on the wrong foot, Hooper.
- I don't think so.
795
01:01:08,707 --> 01:01:11,776
- Oh, Jesus!
- It's just another car jump.
796
01:01:20,177 --> 01:01:23,587
- Did you enjoy that?
- No. No.
797
01:01:31,104 --> 01:01:33,297
- Hey, Sonny!
- Hi, Jane!
798
01:01:33,398 --> 01:01:35,090
You'll work with anybody!
799
01:01:35,192 --> 01:01:37,219
Ah, I love Westerns. Whoo!
800
01:01:39,029 --> 01:01:40,812
Look out! Here comes the wild man!
801
01:01:48,371 --> 01:01:52,316
- Price is 100 grand.
- A hundred grand will be just fine.
802
01:01:53,585 --> 01:01:56,654
- You okay, Hoop?
- Oh, yeah. Just couldn't be better.
803
01:01:56,755 --> 01:01:59,414
Tony might get
a little sick in a second.
804
01:02:48,014 --> 01:02:50,002
He had a stroke.
805
01:02:50,475 --> 01:02:52,167
A stroke?
806
01:02:52,769 --> 01:02:54,171
Yeah.
807
01:02:55,647 --> 01:02:59,216
He says he fell down in the shower
and broke his knee.
808
01:03:00,151 --> 01:03:02,304
The dumb jerk.
809
01:03:02,404 --> 01:03:06,099
Even when they tell him it's a stroke,
he won't accept it.
810
01:03:07,867 --> 01:03:09,434
Come on.
811
01:03:13,039 --> 01:03:14,777
How is he now?
812
01:03:15,333 --> 01:03:16,866
I don't know.
813
01:03:19,045 --> 01:03:21,738
They shot him full of Demerol.
814
01:03:26,136 --> 01:03:30,672
Stupid old bastard.
He's so damn stubborn.
815
01:04:00,962 --> 01:04:03,865
- Jocko?
- Jesus Christ.
816
01:04:03,965 --> 01:04:05,373
Hey.
817
01:04:05,842 --> 01:04:08,745
- Ain't this a bitch?
- Mm.
818
01:04:08,845 --> 01:04:10,583
What happened?
819
01:04:11,014 --> 01:04:12,331
Well...
820
01:04:12,432 --> 01:04:18,171
35 years of falling off horses and airplanes
and every goddamn thing else...
821
01:04:18,271 --> 01:04:20,924
I gotta go and do a brodie
in my own toilet.
822
01:04:23,401 --> 01:04:25,139
You're gonna be all right, Jocko.
823
01:04:33,745 --> 01:04:35,733
You know what a priest told me one time?
824
01:04:36,956 --> 01:04:38,318
No, what?
825
01:04:39,876 --> 01:04:44,697
This priest says to me,
"Son, your body is a temple."
826
01:04:44,798 --> 01:04:49,828
Heh. Hell of a goddamn way
to treat a temple, ain't it?
827
01:04:49,928 --> 01:04:51,788
Horses stepping all over it...
828
01:04:51,888 --> 01:04:57,050
stagecoaches dragging it all through rocks
and cactus and all kinds of shit...
829
01:05:00,522 --> 01:05:03,383
Then I spend the rest of my time...
830
01:05:03,483 --> 01:05:07,018
laying around waiting
for something to heal.
831
01:05:07,737 --> 01:05:09,645
You know what I'm talking about,
don't you?
832
01:05:10,407 --> 01:05:12,770
- Yeah.
- Well...
833
01:05:13,493 --> 01:05:14,810
what for?
834
01:05:15,745 --> 01:05:17,938
Can you tell me what for?
835
01:05:18,039 --> 01:05:22,234
- Well, I think, Jock...
- I don't want to hear all that now, Sonny.
836
01:05:22,335 --> 01:05:25,825
Goddamn, you're a talkative
son of a bitch.
837
01:05:27,590 --> 01:05:32,957
Temple's all busted to shit,
and all you can do is keep on talking.
838
01:05:54,325 --> 01:05:56,859
Did the doctor say anything to you?
839
01:05:57,537 --> 01:05:59,104
Yeah.
840
01:06:00,498 --> 01:06:03,612
They said they don't know
if he'll be able to walk again.
841
01:06:08,423 --> 01:06:10,661
Well, I'll tell you something, Gwenny.
842
01:06:12,677 --> 01:06:15,955
I'm quitting after this picture.
I'm not doing any more stunts.
843
01:06:16,055 --> 01:06:18,418
I'm going to hang it up.
844
01:06:19,934 --> 01:06:21,876
I love you.
845
01:06:21,978 --> 01:06:25,422
I'm gonna make so much money
on this job anyway, I can...
846
01:06:26,191 --> 01:06:28,384
pay off the ranch.
847
01:06:29,569 --> 01:06:31,386
Stock it.
848
01:06:33,448 --> 01:06:35,140
We'll be in high cotton.
849
01:06:35,241 --> 01:06:37,934
Heh. I love you.
850
01:06:40,330 --> 01:06:42,022
What'd you say?
851
01:06:42,707 --> 01:06:44,490
I said, I love you.
852
01:06:47,545 --> 01:06:49,487
I love you too.
853
01:07:02,018 --> 01:07:04,379
Oh. Oh.
854
01:07:04,479 --> 01:07:06,714
You better save some tequila
for breakfast.
855
01:07:06,814 --> 01:07:09,717
Oh, yeah, that's a good idea. Heh.
Come on in.
856
01:07:09,817 --> 01:07:12,720
Where in the hell have you been?
I've been waiting.
857
01:07:12,820 --> 01:07:14,887
- We were at the hospital, Cully.
- Oh?
858
01:07:14,989 --> 01:07:17,773
- Dad had a stroke.
- A stroke?
859
01:07:18,159 --> 01:07:19,769
Really?
860
01:07:19,869 --> 01:07:22,730
- Is he all right?
- He's gonna be all right.
861
01:07:22,830 --> 01:07:25,239
Oh, I'm sorry, Gwen.
862
01:07:25,833 --> 01:07:28,945
- God, Cully, you look perfectly awful.
- Oh, I am. I am.
863
01:07:29,045 --> 01:07:32,782
- I'll get you some supper.
- No, wait, wait, wait. Nothing to eat.
864
01:07:34,384 --> 01:07:37,578
I got fired, heh,
so I came by to say goodbye.
865
01:07:38,346 --> 01:07:42,666
- Fired? What are you talking about?
- Well, see, they were over budget...
866
01:07:42,767 --> 01:07:45,378
and they wanted to get rid
of some of the deadwood.
867
01:07:45,478 --> 01:07:48,296
- My Wood's dead. Heh.
- Who fired you? Max?
868
01:07:50,149 --> 01:07:51,634
I don't really know.
869
01:07:51,734 --> 01:07:57,021
But I got the word
from that little popcorn fart, Tony.
870
01:07:58,992 --> 01:08:00,477
- Oh, no, no.
- Shut up.
871
01:08:00,577 --> 01:08:03,938
Nobody can hire and fire anybody on this...
What are you doing? Come on.
872
01:08:04,038 --> 01:08:06,774
I told them if they fired you,
they'd have to fire me.
873
01:08:06,874 --> 01:08:10,278
- Did you tell them that? I appreciate that.
- Yes, I told them that.
874
01:08:10,378 --> 01:08:14,365
You little rascal. That's why I love you.
We do things for each other.
875
01:08:14,465 --> 01:08:17,202
- I'm gonna do something for you now.
- Do something for me.
876
01:08:17,302 --> 01:08:20,120
Good advice. Get off the damn picture
before you get hurt.
877
01:08:20,221 --> 01:08:23,833
Cully, he told me this is his
last picture. After this, no more.
878
01:08:23,933 --> 01:08:26,877
Oh, sure, if there's anything left of him
after this picture.
879
01:08:26,978 --> 01:08:29,296
- Cully.
- What does that mean?
880
01:08:30,106 --> 01:08:32,424
- Oh. You didn't tell her?
- No, I didn't.
881
01:08:32,525 --> 01:08:34,552
He didn't tell you? Naughty, naughty.
882
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:37,931
He didn't tell you
about the big bad rocket-car stunt?
883
01:08:38,031 --> 01:08:40,767
- Will you stop it?
- No. What stunt?
884
01:08:40,867 --> 01:08:43,144
Oh. Well, I'm gonna let him
fill in the details.
885
01:08:43,244 --> 01:08:45,897
Mind your own business.
Just drink your tequila.
886
01:08:45,997 --> 01:08:49,275
I do want to tell you one thing
while I'm still drunk on your tequila.
887
01:08:49,375 --> 01:08:52,319
- Shit. Oh, shit.
- I went to see his doctor.
888
01:08:52,420 --> 01:08:56,490
I went to see his doctor,
asked him what's going to happen to him...
889
01:08:56,591 --> 01:09:00,245
when he lands that rocket car
over there across the gorge...
890
01:09:00,345 --> 01:09:03,248
- ...how hard it's gonna hit.
- Sonny, what is he talking about?
891
01:09:03,348 --> 01:09:06,917
He's talking about $50,000 over and above
what I'll make on this picture.
892
01:09:07,018 --> 01:09:09,586
Besides, I can't let that kid
do the stunt alone.
893
01:09:09,687 --> 01:09:11,548
The kid? What...? What is this?
894
01:09:11,648 --> 01:09:13,758
You've got Ski in this crazy thing now?
895
01:09:13,858 --> 01:09:17,011
No, Gwenny, it's the other way around.
The kid's got him.
896
01:09:17,111 --> 01:09:19,895
- Will you butt out?
- I told you that kid was gonna get you killed.
897
01:09:21,032 --> 01:09:24,476
Sonny, you told me you were quitting
after this picture...
898
01:09:24,577 --> 01:09:27,395
so you could trade it off
against doing this stunt. True?
899
01:09:27,497 --> 01:09:30,984
You're crazy, you know that?
I'll tell you one thing. You're crazy.
900
01:09:31,084 --> 01:09:33,236
- I don't want to hear your...
- No!
901
01:09:33,336 --> 01:09:35,321
- Dumb jackass!
- Shut your drunken mouth!
902
01:09:35,421 --> 01:09:39,081
- Listen, don't mess up my wardrobe.
- Hey! Sonny!
903
01:09:43,471 --> 01:09:44,998
Oh.
904
01:09:45,098 --> 01:09:47,750
Hundred and seventy-two
motion-picture fights.
905
01:09:47,850 --> 01:09:50,378
That's the first time he ever hit me.
906
01:09:50,478 --> 01:09:52,839
That son of a bitch can hit. Heh.
907
01:09:52,939 --> 01:09:56,508
- Cully, I'm so sorry.
- Oh, he didn't mean it.
908
01:09:56,609 --> 01:09:59,393
If he had meant it,
he'd have hit a lot harder.
909
01:10:00,446 --> 01:10:01,979
He's hurting, Gwenny.
910
01:10:03,282 --> 01:10:05,975
He's got a lot of things on his mind.
911
01:10:07,829 --> 01:10:09,862
Oh, Cully.
912
01:10:15,545 --> 01:10:18,705
- Sonny.
- Mm?
913
01:10:21,884 --> 01:10:24,122
Sonny, will you go home now?
914
01:10:28,725 --> 01:10:30,292
Why?
915
01:10:30,685 --> 01:10:32,593
Please?
916
01:10:33,187 --> 01:10:34,754
Sonny.
917
01:10:37,775 --> 01:10:39,302
I'm sorry. Heh, heh.
918
01:10:39,402 --> 01:10:42,430
Sonny, what are you trying to prove?
919
01:10:42,530 --> 01:10:45,183
Let me ask you something, Debbie.
920
01:10:45,283 --> 01:10:47,810
This is a big town, isn't it?
921
01:10:47,910 --> 01:10:50,979
- I mean, Los Angeles is a big town.
- Yeah.
922
01:10:51,080 --> 01:10:56,402
Well, why the hell does this bar close
before the bars in Tulsa?
923
01:10:58,129 --> 01:11:00,162
Can you answer me that?
924
01:11:00,798 --> 01:11:02,786
I don't know, Sonny.
925
01:11:03,593 --> 01:11:07,413
Hey, let's go somewhere
and have some breakfast. You want to?
926
01:11:09,766 --> 01:11:11,629
I can't do that.
927
01:11:12,185 --> 01:11:14,969
Let's go somewhere and have some lunch.
928
01:11:15,855 --> 01:11:18,264
I can't do that either.
929
01:11:19,442 --> 01:11:23,512
Well, let's go somewhere
and jump each other's bones.
930
01:11:27,533 --> 01:11:30,520
- That is tempting, Sonny. Yeah.
- Is it?
931
01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:33,188
- But you know why I can't do it?
- Why?
932
01:11:33,289 --> 01:11:38,656
Because my husband
is so jealous and so near.
933
01:11:40,171 --> 01:11:41,823
And so big.
934
01:11:41,923 --> 01:11:42,989
Sonny...
935
01:11:48,221 --> 01:11:49,997
- Hey.
- Huh?
936
01:11:50,097 --> 01:11:53,334
When you get so drunk you make a pass
at Debbie in my presence...
937
01:11:53,434 --> 01:11:55,586
- ...it's time for me to call you a cab.
- Yeah.
938
01:11:55,686 --> 01:11:59,215
You don't call me a cab. I am a cab.
You don't need to call me a cab.
939
01:11:59,315 --> 01:12:04,721
I'm perfectly able
to take a walk or ride...
940
01:12:04,821 --> 01:12:07,974
or fly or whatever.
Anything you want me to do, I can do.
941
01:12:08,074 --> 01:12:10,733
- I'm perfectly coordinated.
- Sonny.
942
01:12:11,160 --> 01:12:14,229
So bye-bye and so long.
943
01:14:21,248 --> 01:14:22,900
You said you could do it.
944
01:14:23,000 --> 01:14:26,362
I rewrote the script
because you said you could do it.
945
01:14:26,462 --> 01:14:29,073
We rearranged the shooting schedule.
946
01:14:29,173 --> 01:14:32,117
We spent a damn fortune
preparing for that stunt...
947
01:14:32,218 --> 01:14:34,706
because you said you could do it.
948
01:14:35,179 --> 01:14:38,791
- I was wrong, Roger. I'm sorry.
- You were wrong.
949
01:14:38,891 --> 01:14:42,295
He was wrong, Max. He's sorry.
950
01:14:42,395 --> 01:14:47,808
He blows the whole goddamn movie
and he says, "Gee, I was wrong. Sorry."
951
01:14:50,277 --> 01:14:52,219
Okay, okay. New business.
952
01:14:52,321 --> 01:14:56,309
- Ski does it with someone else, that's all.
- Why don't you forget it, Roger?
953
01:14:56,409 --> 01:14:58,351
I never liked the damn gag anyhow.
954
01:14:58,452 --> 01:15:00,770
- Who else can do the stunt?
- Buddy Joe can do it.
955
01:15:00,871 --> 01:15:02,899
- He's not available.
- Who else?
956
01:15:02,999 --> 01:15:04,486
Nobody.
957
01:15:04,959 --> 01:15:09,029
- What do you mean, nobody?
- I mean nobody. It's a very complicated stunt.
958
01:15:09,130 --> 01:15:12,199
There's maybe three guys that can do it,
and we're not available.
959
01:15:12,299 --> 01:15:14,366
Ski will do it solo with a dummy, then.
960
01:15:15,970 --> 01:15:19,790
Goddamn, Roger. If you knew
what the hell you were talking about...
961
01:15:19,890 --> 01:15:22,293
you'd realize it takes two guys
to do the stunt.
962
01:15:22,393 --> 01:15:25,086
One guy to drive,
one guy to read the instruments.
963
01:15:25,187 --> 01:15:27,425
And I'm telling you
that Ski isn't qualified.
964
01:15:29,525 --> 01:15:32,594
Max, does this man still have a job
on this picture?
965
01:15:32,695 --> 01:15:35,764
Sonny works here as long as I say so.
966
01:15:35,865 --> 01:15:38,604
Or as long as Sonny wants to.
967
01:15:39,160 --> 01:15:40,727
Thank you, Max.
968
01:15:40,828 --> 01:15:43,731
Now, if Sonny says Ski can't do it,
I believe him.
969
01:15:43,831 --> 01:15:46,445
It's only a damn movie anyhow,
for God's sake.
970
01:15:49,253 --> 01:15:51,696
Only a movie?
971
01:15:51,797 --> 01:15:54,325
I want you to call the studio brass.
972
01:15:54,425 --> 01:15:57,662
I want you to tell them
and their stockholders, distributors...
973
01:15:57,762 --> 01:16:00,915
and the bank that it's only a movie.
Will you do that, Max?
974
01:16:01,015 --> 01:16:04,502
I want you to tell them, "Forget about
all your money. It's only a movie."
975
01:16:04,602 --> 01:16:08,046
I'll tell them that no damn movie
is worth a man's life!
976
01:16:09,440 --> 01:16:13,635
And I'll tell them unless I can shoot
this picture the way I want to...
977
01:16:13,736 --> 01:16:17,351
and that means this stunt,
then I take a walk.
978
01:16:18,407 --> 01:16:22,477
And we'll see who walks,
Mr. Berns, you or I.
979
01:16:27,249 --> 01:16:29,282
I'm sorry, Max.
980
01:16:29,877 --> 01:16:32,780
Ah, what the hell, Sonny. What the hell.
981
01:16:35,257 --> 01:16:37,368
You know the old saying:
982
01:16:37,468 --> 01:16:40,537
You'll never work in this town again.
983
01:16:42,139 --> 01:16:44,000
Unless they need you.
984
01:16:58,739 --> 01:17:01,603
- Here you go, Cully.
- Thanks. A Coke?
985
01:17:02,284 --> 01:17:04,852
- If you're still mad, I can just leave...
- Shut up and sit down.
986
01:17:08,582 --> 01:17:11,742
Kind of early in the day
for that hard stuff, isn't it?
987
01:17:12,503 --> 01:17:15,697
I'm working out my left arm
this morning.
988
01:17:15,798 --> 01:17:18,867
I'll get around to my right arm
this afternoon.
989
01:17:21,637 --> 01:17:25,499
You heard what's happening, haven't you?
I'll tell you what's happening.
990
01:17:25,599 --> 01:17:28,964
That new kid, Ski?
Well, they've got him gaffing the show.
991
01:17:30,229 --> 01:17:35,009
You know what else? I'll tell you what else.
They canceled that car stunt.
992
01:17:35,109 --> 01:17:36,469
At least temporarily.
993
01:17:36,569 --> 01:17:38,971
You were absolutely right,
it's a two-man stunt.
994
01:17:39,071 --> 01:17:43,434
Ain't nobody crazy enough to ride with that
kid, with a rocket strapped to his butt.
995
01:17:43,534 --> 01:17:46,687
And you can bet your ass,
your cowboy hat and your house cat...
996
01:17:46,787 --> 01:17:49,901
they're gonna be coming after you
to get you to do the stunt.
997
01:17:50,541 --> 01:17:52,358
You gonna do the stunt?
998
01:17:53,419 --> 01:17:55,578
You know what, Cully?
999
01:17:57,548 --> 01:18:00,992
There's a whole new breed
of stuntman coming along.
1000
01:18:02,303 --> 01:18:04,041
They're younger and...
1001
01:18:04,847 --> 01:18:06,789
stronger...
1002
01:18:07,933 --> 01:18:10,419
tougher than us.
1003
01:18:10,519 --> 01:18:13,881
They don't take pills,
they don't drink...
1004
01:18:13,981 --> 01:18:17,843
they don't... They don't take shots.
1005
01:18:17,943 --> 01:18:20,761
They use little pocket calculators.
1006
01:18:22,156 --> 01:18:25,691
If we don't watch out, they're gonna
blow us right out of the tub.
1007
01:18:26,994 --> 01:18:29,733
You didn't answer my question.
Are you gonna do the stunt?
1008
01:18:34,376 --> 01:18:38,489
Boy, I never realized there were
so many gags at the end of the picture.
1009
01:18:38,589 --> 01:18:40,241
So involved.
1010
01:18:40,341 --> 01:18:44,957
Fire gags, the whole town being blown up,
50 stuntmen doing falls.
1011
01:18:48,182 --> 01:18:49,999
All right, Max.
1012
01:18:51,435 --> 01:18:54,296
What's the real reason
you came out here?
1013
01:18:54,396 --> 01:18:57,260
To ask me to come back
and gaff the show?
1014
01:18:58,442 --> 01:19:00,930
No, it's the rocket-car gag, Sonny.
1015
01:19:01,820 --> 01:19:05,850
- The rocket car?
- It's a two-man job, just like you always said.
1016
01:19:05,950 --> 01:19:07,852
Nobody in town will touch it.
1017
01:19:07,952 --> 01:19:11,313
- Roger's worried that Ski will get hurt.
- That's a lot of bullshit.
1018
01:19:11,413 --> 01:19:14,027
Roger's worried about getting his shot.
1019
01:19:14,583 --> 01:19:17,527
Roger's worried about
finishing his picture.
1020
01:19:17,628 --> 01:19:22,369
So he talked you into coming out here
to ask me to come back and do the gag.
1021
01:19:22,883 --> 01:19:25,661
You tell Roger to go sit
on a short stick.
1022
01:19:25,761 --> 01:19:28,414
- If you won't do it for Roger...
- I'll do it for you?
1023
01:19:28,514 --> 01:19:31,332
- I'd appreciate it.
- You'd appreciate it?
1024
01:19:33,811 --> 01:19:37,471
What happened to you, Max?
You used to be tough.
1025
01:19:38,399 --> 01:19:40,466
Nobody could tell you how
to make a picture.
1026
01:19:41,068 --> 01:19:42,885
And nobody got hurt on your pictures.
1027
01:19:42,987 --> 01:19:45,180
If I don't deliver this picture...
1028
01:19:45,281 --> 01:19:49,817
I'll be the producer who blew
the biggest and hottest project in town.
1029
01:19:51,495 --> 01:19:53,856
All washed up. Finished.
1030
01:19:53,956 --> 01:19:57,116
I'm too old to go back
to selling door-to-door.
1031
01:20:13,475 --> 01:20:15,668
Okay, Max.
1032
01:20:18,230 --> 01:20:19,547
You got me.
1033
01:20:43,005 --> 01:20:44,788
You gonna do it?
1034
01:20:46,342 --> 01:20:47,784
Yeah.
1035
01:20:50,679 --> 01:20:52,087
I'm gonna do it.
1036
01:20:55,351 --> 01:20:57,919
I won't be here when you get back.
1037
01:21:20,501 --> 01:21:23,194
- Hey, Sonny! How you doing, my man?
- Jeffrey.
1038
01:21:23,295 --> 01:21:25,322
- Gary.
- How's it hanging, Sonny?
1039
01:21:25,422 --> 01:21:27,990
- Hi, Sonny. Max said you were coming in.
- Danny.
1040
01:21:28,092 --> 01:21:30,202
Nice to see you back.
1041
01:21:30,302 --> 01:21:32,705
What do you think of my baby?
1042
01:21:32,805 --> 01:21:34,122
It's big.
1043
01:21:34,223 --> 01:21:36,333
Looks like one of King Kong's
suppositories.
1044
01:21:39,228 --> 01:21:42,589
- How you doing, Ski?
- Fine, Sonny. How about you?
1045
01:21:42,689 --> 01:21:44,341
Good.
1046
01:21:44,441 --> 01:21:47,094
Let me tell you guys
how this thing works.
1047
01:21:47,194 --> 01:21:49,637
Now, Sonny, your job
is to dial up the pressure.
1048
01:21:49,738 --> 01:21:54,309
You'll need 1500 pounds,
and that leaves Ski free to drive.
1049
01:21:54,410 --> 01:21:58,647
When the pressure's right,
hit the switch, and you are gone.
1050
01:21:58,747 --> 01:22:01,031
- How's it handle?
- Haven't driven it yet.
1051
01:22:02,501 --> 01:22:04,568
- Let's try it out.
- I heard that.
1052
01:22:19,059 --> 01:22:20,461
How's it feel?
1053
01:22:20,561 --> 01:22:22,674
Pulls a little to the left.
1054
01:22:23,272 --> 01:22:24,882
Anything else?
1055
01:22:24,982 --> 01:22:27,391
That cigarette lighter don't work.
1056
01:22:29,778 --> 01:22:33,265
You just better hope that
that cigarette lighter works.
1057
01:22:40,831 --> 01:22:43,442
We'll be following the explosive truck.
1058
01:22:43,542 --> 01:22:45,985
The driver will jump out,
and it'll blow.
1059
01:22:46,086 --> 01:22:49,781
Supposed to collapse the bridge
from the super structure to the other bank.
1060
01:22:53,886 --> 01:22:58,374
You figure out on that pocket calculator
how many G's we're pulling when we land?
1061
01:22:58,474 --> 01:23:00,876
Eight to 10 if we land on our wheels.
1062
01:23:00,976 --> 01:23:03,212
We gotta make sure
we hit the ramp just right...
1063
01:23:03,312 --> 01:23:05,714
otherwise it'd veer off one way
or the other...
1064
01:23:05,814 --> 01:23:07,966
or could just go head
first into that bank.
1065
01:23:08,066 --> 01:23:11,095
- If that happens, there's just one thing to do.
- What's that?
1066
01:23:11,195 --> 01:23:14,434
Put your head between your legs
and kiss your ass goodbye.
1067
01:23:16,658 --> 01:23:18,316
It's a piece of cake.
1068
01:23:24,791 --> 01:23:26,819
I'll buy you a drink.
1069
01:23:26,919 --> 01:23:29,154
You don't drink, do you?
1070
01:23:29,254 --> 01:23:30,864
I'm willing to start.
1071
01:23:30,964 --> 01:23:32,906
Damn good time to do it.
1072
01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:36,952
You know...
1073
01:23:37,054 --> 01:23:40,958
all this hanging around with you,
I think you're starting to rub off on me.
1074
01:23:41,058 --> 01:23:43,836
- How's that?
- Well, a couple ways.
1075
01:23:45,145 --> 01:23:46,462
Excuse me.
1076
01:23:46,563 --> 01:23:50,132
My first marriage, you know,
is more than likely in the shitter.
1077
01:23:50,234 --> 01:23:51,767
Oh, yeah.
1078
01:23:52,569 --> 01:23:55,558
And I'm learning to drink and liking it.
1079
01:23:58,116 --> 01:24:01,060
Yeah, well...
1080
01:24:01,161 --> 01:24:05,106
my present relationship is not good.
1081
01:24:05,207 --> 01:24:07,149
Actually, it's in the shitter too.
1082
01:24:09,628 --> 01:24:14,158
Well, what the hell
is it about stuntmen...
1083
01:24:14,258 --> 01:24:16,535
and their wives and relationships?
1084
01:24:16,635 --> 01:24:21,080
I don't know.
It's a little like drinking and driving.
1085
01:24:21,890 --> 01:24:24,418
Eventually there's gonna be
a hell of a wreck.
1086
01:24:24,518 --> 01:24:27,507
- Hey, guys.
- Hey. Oh, hey.
1087
01:24:28,397 --> 01:24:30,715
- Is this your car?
- Yeah.
1088
01:24:30,816 --> 01:24:33,552
- Looks pretty fast.
- Looks ain't deceiving.
1089
01:24:33,652 --> 01:24:38,807
From the looks of them beer cans,
I'd say you two guys were a little drunk.
1090
01:24:38,907 --> 01:24:42,476
Like I said, looks ain't deceiving,
you old fart.
1091
01:24:42,578 --> 01:24:44,730
Better let me handle this.
1092
01:24:44,830 --> 01:24:47,691
I hope you guys ain't planning
on doing any more driving.
1093
01:24:47,791 --> 01:24:50,903
We're not gonna do any more driving.
I just called my mother.
1094
01:24:51,003 --> 01:24:54,197
And she's gonna come out here
and pick us up and take us home.
1095
01:24:54,298 --> 01:24:56,491
I'm gonna leave the car here
and go home with her.
1096
01:24:58,093 --> 01:25:00,536
- Your mother?
- Yeah.
1097
01:25:00,637 --> 01:25:01,954
I hope you're right.
1098
01:25:05,726 --> 01:25:07,293
Old fart.
1099
01:25:07,394 --> 01:25:10,547
So the queen says to the photographer:
1100
01:25:10,647 --> 01:25:13,634
"I got a brother-in-law
that's a photographer."
1101
01:25:13,734 --> 01:25:17,262
The photographer says, "So?
I've got a brother-in-law that's a queen."
1102
01:25:19,865 --> 01:25:22,518
Oh. Look what we got here.
1103
01:25:22,618 --> 01:25:24,401
Howdy, old fart.
1104
01:25:26,371 --> 01:25:28,564
Afternoon, officer. Nice day, isn't it?
1105
01:25:29,249 --> 01:25:30,736
Pull up, right over there!
1106
01:25:31,293 --> 01:25:34,362
- What's that?
- I said, pull over up front!
1107
01:25:34,463 --> 01:25:37,241
- Pull over up front, that's what I said!
- Gotcha.
1108
01:25:37,341 --> 01:25:38,658
Shall we?
1109
01:25:40,344 --> 01:25:42,411
Say goodbye to the nice officer.
1110
01:25:42,971 --> 01:25:44,629
Bye-bye, nice officer.
1111
01:25:50,395 --> 01:25:52,588
Great God almighty!
1112
01:25:53,899 --> 01:25:55,762
Headquarters!
1113
01:25:57,194 --> 01:25:58,476
Never mind.
1114
01:25:58,737 --> 01:26:00,847
All right, Tony, I'm coming down.
1115
01:26:00,947 --> 01:26:03,640
Get Hooper and Ski ready, will you?
1116
01:26:03,742 --> 01:26:06,981
All right, move it out of here.
The helicopter's coming down.
1117
01:26:09,706 --> 01:26:12,399
Tony, do I have to do everything myself?
1118
01:26:12,501 --> 01:26:14,739
Get those people out of here.
1119
01:26:16,755 --> 01:26:19,699
Hooper! Ski! Get over here.
Roger wants you.
1120
01:26:20,634 --> 01:26:22,827
Let's go, let's go! Over here!
1121
01:26:31,395 --> 01:26:36,387
We'll be putting away this thing here.
We're gonna blow all this up.
1122
01:26:37,984 --> 01:26:43,223
As you remember, it's a giant earthquake,
you know, with fires, explosions...
1123
01:26:43,323 --> 01:26:46,810
buildings falling everywhere,
chaos, terror...
1124
01:26:46,910 --> 01:26:49,444
and you'll be driving through it.
1125
01:26:51,498 --> 01:26:54,401
It has a nice grayness, like La Strada.
1126
01:26:54,501 --> 01:26:57,487
All right, I'll be in the chopper
for all of this.
1127
01:26:57,587 --> 01:27:00,656
And we start back there
at the administration building.
1128
01:27:00,757 --> 01:27:03,535
When the earthquake hits,
we collapse the building.
1129
01:27:03,635 --> 01:27:07,247
That's a great idea, Roger.
That's gonna look terrific on film.
1130
01:27:07,347 --> 01:27:09,915
Now, this gas station is where...
1131
01:27:10,892 --> 01:27:15,505
you'll force one of those cars
chasing you to hit those pumps...
1132
01:27:15,605 --> 01:27:18,514
and that'll set off our main tank.
1133
01:27:19,776 --> 01:27:21,386
Sensational idea, Roger.
1134
01:27:21,486 --> 01:27:22,928
It's the only way it can be filmed.
1135
01:27:24,781 --> 01:27:26,808
Actually, you're quite wrong, Tony.
1136
01:27:26,908 --> 01:27:30,437
There are several ways of doing it,
but this is undoubtedly the best.
1137
01:27:30,537 --> 01:27:32,439
All right, Sonny, I'm depending on you.
1138
01:27:32,539 --> 01:27:36,984
I want some good stunts, some cars skidding,
other cars crashing into each other...
1139
01:27:37,085 --> 01:27:40,279
but these smokestacks are important.
1140
01:27:40,380 --> 01:27:45,035
When they fall, they demolish everything.
They've got to just miss your car.
1141
01:27:45,135 --> 01:27:47,120
That is crucial...
1142
01:27:47,220 --> 01:27:50,539
because we can't put those stacks
back together again.
1143
01:27:50,640 --> 01:27:52,250
That's right, Roger.
1144
01:27:52,350 --> 01:27:55,504
Here's where you find the explosives truck
that blows the bridge...
1145
01:27:55,604 --> 01:27:59,094
and of course,
your car will have to jump the river.
1146
01:28:06,656 --> 01:28:09,810
We'll go over here where we can get
a good view of the jump.
1147
01:28:09,910 --> 01:28:12,562
- It's good to see you.
- You've come for the jump, right?
1148
01:28:12,662 --> 01:28:14,439
- Yeah.
- It's gonna be neat. Later.
1149
01:28:14,539 --> 01:28:17,818
Hey, Gwen. Gwen. Do you want to see him?
1150
01:28:17,918 --> 01:28:19,451
No.
1151
01:28:20,462 --> 01:28:22,074
Afterward.
1152
01:28:28,011 --> 01:28:30,545
Roger wants to talk to you guys.
1153
01:28:31,223 --> 01:28:32,749
Yeah, Roger?
1154
01:28:32,849 --> 01:28:35,711
All right, Ski, Sonny, this is Roger.
You boys ready?
1155
01:28:35,811 --> 01:28:39,221
- We were born ready.
- Wonderful. Let's try one, shall we?
1156
01:28:40,232 --> 01:28:42,425
One's all you get, hoss.
1157
01:28:42,526 --> 01:28:45,470
- Good luck, guys.
- Hold this while we're gone, will you?
1158
01:28:45,570 --> 01:28:49,435
Remember, people, no one ever won
an Oscar for second best. So get ready.
1159
01:28:52,994 --> 01:28:56,773
- All right, this is it. Roll the cameras.
- Speed.
1160
01:28:56,873 --> 01:28:59,609
- Rolling cameras one through five.
- Six through nine.
1161
01:28:59,709 --> 01:29:02,994
- Eleven and 12.
- Action! Go, go, go!
1162
01:29:24,234 --> 01:29:26,518
We're up to pressure, 1500 pounds.
1163
01:29:34,494 --> 01:29:36,311
Goddamn. Cliff was working overtime.
1164
01:29:45,422 --> 01:29:47,865
We're losing...
We're losing some pressure.
1165
01:29:47,966 --> 01:29:51,535
- Well, stick the thing up to full power!
- I already did that!
1166
01:29:51,636 --> 01:29:53,997
It's down, 1400 pounds.
1167
01:29:54,097 --> 01:29:56,005
- It just ain't enough.
- It better be.
1168
01:30:11,531 --> 01:30:13,098
Good, boy. You're doing great.
1169
01:30:35,597 --> 01:30:36,663
Woo-hoo!
1170
01:30:44,230 --> 01:30:47,048
Holy shit. Your speed is right on.
1171
01:30:49,861 --> 01:30:51,678
- I love it! I love it! Ha-ha-ha!
- Whoo!
1172
01:31:04,125 --> 01:31:06,443
We're down to 1100 pounds pressure.
1173
01:31:06,544 --> 01:31:08,737
- We're in trouble now.
- Goddamn it, Sonny.
1174
01:31:30,318 --> 01:31:33,430
One more curve and they're gonna blow
that bridge all to shit!
1175
01:31:33,530 --> 01:31:35,973
Get on it, son!
Put the pedal to the metal!
1176
01:31:45,625 --> 01:31:47,692
Get onto that explosives truck's ass!
1177
01:31:59,639 --> 01:32:01,331
What the hell's the matter?
1178
01:32:01,433 --> 01:32:03,796
- Haven't got enough pressure.
- Screw the pressure!
1179
01:32:09,858 --> 01:32:11,800
What is happening?
1180
01:32:13,028 --> 01:32:16,932
What the hell is going on down there?
Keep rolling, goddamn it!
1181
01:32:17,032 --> 01:32:19,267
My life's worth
more than a piece of film.
1182
01:32:19,367 --> 01:32:23,229
I'll tell you exactly what your life is worth.
Your life is worth $50,000.
1183
01:32:23,329 --> 01:32:25,982
The price you put on it
when you got behind this wheel.
1184
01:32:26,082 --> 01:32:29,694
Sonny, Ski, if you do not try
to make this jump...
1185
01:32:29,794 --> 01:32:32,658
you'll never work in this town again.
Is that...?
1186
01:32:34,090 --> 01:32:36,701
- We're going, huh?
- We're going, yeah, we're going.
1187
01:32:36,801 --> 01:32:38,664
Heh. You're crazy.
1188
01:32:42,057 --> 01:32:44,042
- I'm gonna hit it.
- Whoo!
1189
01:32:44,142 --> 01:32:45,880
Whoo!
1190
01:33:01,367 --> 01:33:03,685
I just don't believe it.
1191
01:33:04,079 --> 01:33:09,275
Cut, cut, cut! And print, goddamn it!
Get me down.
1192
01:33:16,591 --> 01:33:19,535
- Get that door open!
- And get that crowbar over here!
1193
01:33:20,386 --> 01:33:23,000
- Let me get in there.
- Can't get it open.
1194
01:33:23,473 --> 01:33:24,790
Get away.
1195
01:33:25,517 --> 01:33:28,005
Sonny, are you all right?
1196
01:33:28,603 --> 01:33:32,514
Sonny, are you all right? Sonny!
Jesus, Sonny!
1197
01:33:40,115 --> 01:33:42,433
- Yes, I know, I know, I know.
- He made it across!
1198
01:33:50,208 --> 01:33:51,695
Sonny.
1199
01:33:52,710 --> 01:33:54,197
Sonny.
1200
01:33:58,842 --> 01:34:00,909
Hey, hey, hey!
1201
01:34:06,683 --> 01:34:09,001
That was a hell of a jump!
1202
01:34:30,665 --> 01:34:32,698
Make room for Jocko.
1203
01:34:34,460 --> 01:34:38,198
- I'd like to take another look at that spot.
- Yeah, from this side.
1204
01:34:38,298 --> 01:34:41,207
You're just the greatest.
I love you both.
1205
01:34:41,718 --> 01:34:46,414
- Gwen. Gwen, that was his best stunt ever.
- It was his last, Max.
1206
01:34:50,018 --> 01:34:53,132
- Zoom!
- Wild stunt.
1207
01:34:54,355 --> 01:34:56,508
Max, Max, we did it.
1208
01:34:56,608 --> 01:35:00,637
We just filmed the most extraordinary
stunt of all time, and we got it.
1209
01:35:00,737 --> 01:35:02,429
- Tony?
- Yeah, Max?
1210
01:35:02,530 --> 01:35:04,015
You're fired.
1211
01:35:04,115 --> 01:35:06,228
Right, Mr. Berns.
1212
01:35:27,347 --> 01:35:28,748
Spectacular.
1213
01:35:28,848 --> 01:35:31,917
Wonderful. I knew you could do it.
1214
01:35:32,018 --> 01:35:34,879
I never saw anything like it.
1215
01:35:34,979 --> 01:35:38,633
It was wonderful. What can I say?
It was wonderful.
1216
01:35:38,733 --> 01:35:41,972
Hooper, can I speak to you for a sec?
1217
01:35:50,787 --> 01:35:54,274
Look, I know we didn't get along
on this picture.
1218
01:35:54,374 --> 01:35:57,113
I also know you think
I'm a tyrannical egomaniac.
1219
01:35:58,586 --> 01:36:00,779
Well, maybe it's true...
1220
01:36:00,880 --> 01:36:04,242
but films are tiny pieces of time...
1221
01:36:04,342 --> 01:36:06,828
and we captured it.
1222
01:36:06,928 --> 01:36:08,580
I only do it for one reason.
1223
01:36:08,680 --> 01:36:11,874
To make the best movie I can...
1224
01:36:11,975 --> 01:36:15,128
because I'm a pro just like you.
1225
01:36:15,228 --> 01:36:17,796
I'm also big enough to apologize...
1226
01:36:17,897 --> 01:36:21,512
and I know you're big enough to accept.
1227
01:36:24,779 --> 01:36:26,346
Well, Roger...
1228
01:36:27,282 --> 01:36:28,849
as usual...
1229
01:36:30,994 --> 01:36:33,187
you're wrong.
99931
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