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1
00:00:03,136 --> 00:00:04,702
What are you doing?
2
00:00:04,703 --> 00:00:06,304
Well, Larry called earlier.
3
00:00:06,305 --> 00:00:09,241
He's all uptight about
the Blakely account.
4
00:00:09,242 --> 00:00:12,110
I told him I'd
rough out some ideas
5
00:00:12,111 --> 00:00:13,311
and mail 'em in tomorrow.
6
00:00:13,312 --> 00:00:15,013
Doesn't he know
you're on vacation?
7
00:00:15,014 --> 00:00:17,615
Oh, he knows.
But he doesn't care.
8
00:00:17,616 --> 00:00:18,750
Oh.
9
00:00:18,751 --> 00:00:21,452
Besides, if I do
this preliminary work,
10
00:00:21,453 --> 00:00:23,188
it'll keep him
from coming up here.
11
00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:24,856
Hm. Some vacation.
12
00:00:24,857 --> 00:00:26,124
You're stuck here working,
13
00:00:26,125 --> 00:00:27,658
and I'm off to a meeting.
14
00:00:27,659 --> 00:00:28,927
What's on the agenda?
15
00:00:28,928 --> 00:00:33,031
Well, uh, tonight we install
the new resident witch.
16
00:00:33,032 --> 00:00:34,399
Resident witch?
17
00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:37,235
Yes. We've had one living here
in Salem incognito
18
00:00:37,236 --> 00:00:39,337
ever since
the witch-hunts of 1692,
19
00:00:39,338 --> 00:00:41,907
just to make sure
it never happens again.
20
00:00:41,908 --> 00:00:43,741
You know...
21
00:00:43,742 --> 00:00:45,643
some of you witches
aren't half bad.
22
00:00:45,644 --> 00:00:46,778
[CHUCKLES]
23
00:00:46,779 --> 00:00:48,046
[♪]
24
00:00:48,047 --> 00:00:51,016
Why don't we forget about
work and conventions?
25
00:00:51,017 --> 00:00:53,018
Let's think of this
as a second honeymoon.
26
00:00:55,688 --> 00:00:56,788
Mm.
27
00:00:56,789 --> 00:00:58,123
I can get out of the meeting.
28
00:00:58,124 --> 00:00:59,424
I'll tell them I came down with
29
00:00:59,425 --> 00:01:01,593
a very bad case of love.
30
00:01:01,594 --> 00:01:03,461
ENDORA:
As chairlady of the meeting,
31
00:01:03,462 --> 00:01:06,664
I would not consider ita proper excuse.
32
00:01:09,168 --> 00:01:11,269
Why don't you
ever knock, Endora?
33
00:01:11,270 --> 00:01:13,271
And why don't you ever
34
00:01:13,272 --> 00:01:14,472
knock it off?
35
00:01:14,473 --> 00:01:17,608
Come along, Samantha.
We'll be late.
36
00:01:17,609 --> 00:01:19,777
I'll try not to wake you up
when I get back.
37
00:01:19,778 --> 00:01:21,846
Uh, you'd better wake me up...
38
00:01:21,847 --> 00:01:23,181
or I'll never forgive you.
39
00:01:25,784 --> 00:01:27,085
[♪]
40
00:01:28,287 --> 00:01:29,820
[APPLAUSE]
41
00:01:32,358 --> 00:01:35,093
After a short recess...
42
00:01:35,094 --> 00:01:36,761
we'll deal with the appointment
43
00:01:36,762 --> 00:01:39,063
of the new resident
witch of Salem.
44
00:01:39,064 --> 00:01:42,767
As you well know,
this office was created
45
00:01:42,768 --> 00:01:46,104
out of the wisdom of
the high priestess, Hepzibah...
46
00:01:46,105 --> 00:01:49,507
in the year 1692...
47
00:01:49,508 --> 00:01:51,943
dedicated to protect
48
00:01:51,944 --> 00:01:54,312
the image of the witch.
49
00:01:54,313 --> 00:01:58,350
And if necessary,
through the use of witchcraft,
50
00:01:58,351 --> 00:01:59,951
to protect those innocent people
51
00:01:59,952 --> 00:02:01,986
who may be accused as witches.
52
00:02:01,987 --> 00:02:05,624
As well as to protect
against themselves...
53
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:10,262
those mortals
so foolish as to cry:
54
00:02:10,263 --> 00:02:12,197
"Witch!"
55
00:02:12,198 --> 00:02:13,731
[APPLAUSE]
56
00:02:13,732 --> 00:02:15,400
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
57
00:02:19,372 --> 00:02:22,173
This coven is now in recess.
58
00:02:22,174 --> 00:02:23,475
[♪]
59
00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:27,112
WOMAN: I'm going to get
a little bit of food.
60
00:02:27,113 --> 00:02:28,679
[LIQUID BUBBLING]
61
00:02:30,216 --> 00:02:31,216
[GASPS]
62
00:02:31,217 --> 00:02:32,217
MAN:
Guess who.
63
00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:34,785
Ha-ha. Waldo.
Who else?
64
00:02:34,786 --> 00:02:35,887
How did you guess?
65
00:02:35,888 --> 00:02:37,622
The wart on your little finger.
66
00:02:37,623 --> 00:02:39,891
From the time
you turned me into a frog
67
00:02:39,892 --> 00:02:41,026
when we were children.
68
00:02:41,027 --> 00:02:42,293
I'm sorry it never went away.
69
00:02:42,294 --> 00:02:43,728
I'm not.
70
00:02:43,729 --> 00:02:46,331
This foolish thing
reminds me of you.
71
00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:47,598
[CHUCKLES] Oh. [CHUCKLES]
72
00:02:47,599 --> 00:02:48,933
Waldo. Grow up.
73
00:02:48,934 --> 00:02:51,336
I'm happily married with
two beautiful children.
74
00:02:51,337 --> 00:02:53,704
Yeah, but to a mortal.
That doesn't count.
75
00:02:53,705 --> 00:02:55,740
Silly.
Oh, excuse me.
76
00:02:55,741 --> 00:02:57,008
I-I'm needed.
77
00:02:57,009 --> 00:02:59,010
[♪]
78
00:02:59,011 --> 00:03:00,445
[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
79
00:03:04,283 --> 00:03:06,684
[♪]
80
00:03:12,091 --> 00:03:14,092
Fly into my nest My love.
81
00:03:15,327 --> 00:03:18,796
Though you may be second bestMy love.
82
00:03:18,797 --> 00:03:22,133
Though you're only make-believeMy love.
83
00:03:22,134 --> 00:03:24,869
At least you're mine this eveMy love.
84
00:03:28,340 --> 00:03:31,109
Wasn't very nice of her
telling me to grow up.
85
00:03:31,110 --> 00:03:34,478
But, Waldo, my darling, my love.
86
00:03:34,479 --> 00:03:37,515
That's the thing
I adore about you:
87
00:03:37,516 --> 00:03:39,618
Your boyish quality.
88
00:03:39,619 --> 00:03:40,685
That's better.
89
00:03:40,686 --> 00:03:42,120
I love you, Waldo.
90
00:03:42,121 --> 00:03:43,588
Do you love me?
91
00:03:43,589 --> 00:03:45,857
Do I love thee?
92
00:03:47,426 --> 00:03:49,027
Let me count the ways.
93
00:03:49,028 --> 00:03:51,062
Let me count the ways.
94
00:03:51,063 --> 00:03:52,797
One, like some kind of nut.
95
00:03:52,798 --> 00:03:54,666
Two, like a case of
arrested development.
96
00:03:54,667 --> 00:03:55,867
Mother, you're intruding.
97
00:03:55,868 --> 00:03:57,269
On a what?
On a nothing.
98
00:03:57,270 --> 00:03:58,803
On a figment
of your imagination.
99
00:03:58,804 --> 00:04:01,439
It's my figment.
Please don't interfere.
100
00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:02,640
She's air, Waldo.
101
00:04:02,641 --> 00:04:05,610
You make her up in
that sick brain of yours.
102
00:04:05,611 --> 00:04:09,380
All these centuries,
pining over one skinny witch.
103
00:04:09,381 --> 00:04:11,749
I have a right
to lead my own life.
104
00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:12,750
Then lead it.
105
00:04:12,751 --> 00:04:14,419
Do something.
106
00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:15,920
I will.
107
00:04:16,955 --> 00:04:18,456
I promise you.
108
00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:23,694
[♪]
109
00:04:28,033 --> 00:04:30,868
[NARRATOR READING
ON-SCREEN TEXT]
110
00:04:30,869 --> 00:04:32,770
[♪]
111
00:05:09,174 --> 00:05:12,143
[♪]
112
00:05:15,514 --> 00:05:18,015
[♪]
113
00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:20,918
Sweetheart?
114
00:05:22,788 --> 00:05:24,489
Has room service come yet?
115
00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:25,823
No, not yet.
116
00:05:25,824 --> 00:05:27,725
Oh, dear. I'm afraid
I'm only gonna have time
117
00:05:27,726 --> 00:05:29,060
for a cup of coffee.
118
00:05:29,061 --> 00:05:31,629
I thought the witching hour
started at midnight.
119
00:05:31,630 --> 00:05:33,498
Yes, well, huh, Mother put me
120
00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:35,099
on the Ways and Means Committee.
121
00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:36,801
She's the chairman.
122
00:05:36,802 --> 00:05:38,703
If she's the chairman,
it should be called
123
00:05:38,704 --> 00:05:40,871
the Ways to be Mean Committee.
124
00:05:42,007 --> 00:05:43,708
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
MAN: Room service!
125
00:05:43,709 --> 00:05:44,575
Come in.
126
00:05:44,576 --> 00:05:46,077
[♪]
[DOOR OPENS]
127
00:05:48,580 --> 00:05:50,348
Now, you certainly
took your time.
128
00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:52,383
You don't like it, go back
where you came from.
129
00:05:54,086 --> 00:05:55,386
[CHUCKLES]
130
00:05:55,387 --> 00:05:57,388
I tipped the waiter
to let me do it.
131
00:05:57,389 --> 00:05:59,023
Ha-ha. Funny, huh?
132
00:05:59,024 --> 00:06:01,659
[LAUGHING]
133
00:06:01,660 --> 00:06:03,501
[LAUGHTER SLOWS
AWKWARDLY]
134
00:06:05,330 --> 00:06:06,931
I'll let you know in a minute.
135
00:06:06,932 --> 00:06:08,433
What are you doing here?
136
00:06:08,434 --> 00:06:09,967
Well, knowing that
you'd be anxious
137
00:06:09,968 --> 00:06:12,136
to show me your progress
on the Blakely account,
138
00:06:12,137 --> 00:06:13,871
I gladly sacrificed my time
139
00:06:13,872 --> 00:06:15,240
to come up here to see you.
140
00:06:15,241 --> 00:06:16,807
But I thought we agreed
yesterday
141
00:06:16,808 --> 00:06:18,075
that you weren't coming up.
142
00:06:18,076 --> 00:06:19,110
That was yesterday.
143
00:06:19,111 --> 00:06:21,279
We can't keep
living in the past.
144
00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:23,948
I-I don't quite follow that.
145
00:06:23,949 --> 00:06:25,750
What he means is
we can't keep living
146
00:06:25,751 --> 00:06:27,285
in the past because
he's too busy
147
00:06:27,286 --> 00:06:28,919
bothering us in the present.
148
00:06:29,955 --> 00:06:31,989
Now, here are the roughs
of my presentation.
149
00:06:31,990 --> 00:06:33,725
Take them back
with my blessings.
150
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:36,261
Now, don't think I don't
appreciate this,
151
00:06:36,262 --> 00:06:37,928
but who can do
a better selling-job
152
00:06:37,929 --> 00:06:40,131
than the man
who created these gems?
153
00:06:40,132 --> 00:06:41,432
Sorry.
154
00:06:41,433 --> 00:06:43,301
Oh, what's wrong with
picking up a fat bonus
155
00:06:43,302 --> 00:06:44,969
while you're on vacation?
156
00:06:44,970 --> 00:06:46,371
Blakely digs you.
157
00:06:46,372 --> 00:06:48,439
He likes your kind of pizzazz.
158
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:50,308
I'm all pizzazzed out.
159
00:06:50,309 --> 00:06:52,243
That's why I'm on vacation.
160
00:06:52,244 --> 00:06:54,279
Sweetheart, if you'd really like
161
00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:55,580
to go back for just
a day or two,
162
00:06:55,581 --> 00:06:56,781
I wouldn't mind.
163
00:06:56,782 --> 00:06:59,384
It's that kind of
loyalty that makes me
164
00:06:59,385 --> 00:07:00,918
proud to be an American.
165
00:07:00,919 --> 00:07:02,287
Ah, you...
166
00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:04,622
You fellas figure it out.
I have some family business.
167
00:07:04,623 --> 00:07:07,425
Now, I'll meet you back here
at 1:00 for lunch, okay?
168
00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:09,160
Bye-bye, Larry.
Bye, Sam.
169
00:07:10,462 --> 00:07:11,862
How about it, friend?
170
00:07:13,198 --> 00:07:14,666
Oh, aren't you gonna
eat anything
171
00:07:14,667 --> 00:07:16,066
after all the trouble I went to?
172
00:07:16,067 --> 00:07:17,468
Nope.
173
00:07:17,469 --> 00:07:19,470
I'm off to see
the sights of Salem.
174
00:07:19,471 --> 00:07:20,738
Now, that's what I mean.
175
00:07:20,739 --> 00:07:23,174
Even the way you said that,
it's got a ring to it.
176
00:07:23,175 --> 00:07:25,943
Just a couple of days, Darrin.
For crying out...
177
00:07:25,944 --> 00:07:27,878
DARRIN: You know, I've
been learning a lot
178
00:07:27,879 --> 00:07:29,247
about early American history.
179
00:07:29,248 --> 00:07:30,514
Now, isn't it fascinating
180
00:07:30,515 --> 00:07:32,483
that one of Nathaniel
Hawthorne's ancestors
181
00:07:32,484 --> 00:07:35,586
actually presided at
the Salem witchcraft trials?
182
00:07:35,587 --> 00:07:37,555
Speaking of witchcraft,
183
00:07:37,556 --> 00:07:40,057
that's what it's going to take
to save the Blakely account.
184
00:07:40,058 --> 00:07:41,659
[CAMERA CLICKS]
185
00:07:41,660 --> 00:07:42,793
DARRIN:
Get over there.
186
00:07:42,794 --> 00:07:44,595
I'll take your picture
with Roger Conant.
187
00:07:44,596 --> 00:07:46,330
He led one of the first groups
188
00:07:46,331 --> 00:07:48,532
to settle in Salem in 1626.
189
00:07:48,533 --> 00:07:50,868
That old boy goes way back.
190
00:07:50,869 --> 00:07:52,737
What about our friendship?
191
00:07:52,738 --> 00:07:54,405
That goes way back too.
192
00:07:54,406 --> 00:07:55,973
Why don't you think about that?
193
00:07:55,974 --> 00:07:58,909
[♪]
194
00:07:58,910 --> 00:08:00,611
[SEAGULLS CAWING]
195
00:08:02,547 --> 00:08:03,648
Go on. Take it.
196
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:04,882
You can call it,
197
00:08:04,883 --> 00:08:08,252
"Man Begging in Front of
House of Seven Gables."
198
00:08:08,253 --> 00:08:09,587
A half day.
199
00:08:09,588 --> 00:08:12,022
Come back for one half day.
200
00:08:12,023 --> 00:08:13,090
No.
201
00:08:13,091 --> 00:08:15,660
This is my first
vacation in four years,
202
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,328
and you're not gonna
bully me out of it
203
00:08:17,329 --> 00:08:19,163
or wheedle me out of it.
204
00:08:19,164 --> 00:08:20,398
But now I mean it, Larry.
205
00:08:20,399 --> 00:08:22,300
I am staying
right here in Salem.
206
00:08:22,301 --> 00:08:23,334
Period.
207
00:08:23,335 --> 00:08:24,535
End of discussion.
208
00:08:24,536 --> 00:08:26,704
Darrin, let's not
beat around the bush.
209
00:08:26,705 --> 00:08:28,972
I want a definite answer.
210
00:08:28,973 --> 00:08:31,676
If you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna buy some more film.
211
00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:33,277
Fine.
212
00:08:33,278 --> 00:08:35,379
I'll be waiting patiently.
213
00:08:42,488 --> 00:08:44,222
[♪]
214
00:08:52,130 --> 00:08:54,065
FANTASY SAMANTHA:
I love you, Waldo.
215
00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:56,466
I love you more than
life itself.
216
00:08:57,736 --> 00:08:59,136
Tell me more.
217
00:08:59,137 --> 00:09:02,339
Don't think that I haven't
paid the price in loneliness.
218
00:09:02,340 --> 00:09:04,609
WALDO: Perhaps we shouldn't
be meeting like this.
219
00:09:04,610 --> 00:09:06,611
We shouldn't?
220
00:09:06,612 --> 00:09:09,179
But our lives are
full of "shouldn'ts."
221
00:09:09,180 --> 00:09:11,549
Can a star stop twinkling?
222
00:09:11,550 --> 00:09:13,651
Can a bird stop singing?
223
00:09:16,255 --> 00:09:17,255
Oh!
224
00:09:18,257 --> 00:09:19,423
I'm sorry.
225
00:09:20,325 --> 00:09:21,925
Where are you going?
226
00:09:21,926 --> 00:09:24,262
There's supposed to be
a grape arbor through there.
227
00:09:24,263 --> 00:09:25,529
Well, they're out of season.
228
00:09:25,530 --> 00:09:28,065
Uh, ju... Just a lot
of naked vines.
229
00:09:28,066 --> 00:09:29,601
Let's get out of here.
Uh...
230
00:09:29,602 --> 00:09:31,368
Boy, you're really
upset, aren't you?
231
00:09:31,369 --> 00:09:32,770
Upset? Me?
232
00:09:32,771 --> 00:09:34,772
Ha-ha.
About what?
233
00:09:34,773 --> 00:09:37,976
About my refusing to help out
with the Blakely account.
234
00:09:37,977 --> 00:09:41,312
I'm sorry I made such
a federal case out of it.
235
00:09:41,313 --> 00:09:42,546
[SIGHS]
236
00:09:42,547 --> 00:09:44,515
I'll go back if
it's that important.
237
00:09:44,516 --> 00:09:46,383
You will not.
238
00:09:46,384 --> 00:09:48,252
You stick to your guns, boy.
239
00:09:48,253 --> 00:09:50,354
You haven't had
a vacation in four years,
240
00:09:50,355 --> 00:09:52,790
and you're not gonna
let me bully you out of it
241
00:09:52,791 --> 00:09:54,626
or wheedle you out of it.
242
00:09:54,627 --> 00:09:57,061
You're staying
right here in Salem...
243
00:09:57,062 --> 00:09:58,262
with Samantha.
244
00:09:58,263 --> 00:09:59,597
And furthermore...
245
00:09:59,598 --> 00:10:04,769
Perhaps if I met her husband
and learned to hate him...
246
00:10:04,770 --> 00:10:07,090
I could force myself
to get rid of him.
247
00:10:07,906 --> 00:10:10,240
[UPTEMPO LOUNGE MUSIC PLAYING]
248
00:10:10,241 --> 00:10:11,509
LARRY:
Believe me, Darrin,
249
00:10:11,510 --> 00:10:12,976
I can handle
the Blakely account.
250
00:10:12,977 --> 00:10:15,479
You don't have to
come back to New York.
251
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:16,814
I wonder what's keeping Sam.
252
00:10:16,815 --> 00:10:18,248
Well, how should I know?
253
00:10:18,249 --> 00:10:19,583
I mean, uh...
254
00:10:19,584 --> 00:10:21,118
why'd you ask me that?
255
00:10:21,119 --> 00:10:22,653
It was just
a rhetorical question.
256
00:10:22,654 --> 00:10:24,254
I-I didn't expect an answer.
257
00:10:24,255 --> 00:10:26,089
Ah, here she is.
258
00:10:26,090 --> 00:10:27,491
Hi, sweetheart.
Sorry I'm late.
259
00:10:27,492 --> 00:10:28,626
Mwah.
260
00:10:28,627 --> 00:10:29,727
Forgive me, Larry.
261
00:10:29,728 --> 00:10:30,728
I'll try.
262
00:10:30,729 --> 00:10:32,463
Another martini, please.
263
00:10:32,464 --> 00:10:35,700
Oh. Shopping in
this town is impossible.
264
00:10:35,701 --> 00:10:37,769
I thought you were
visiting relatives.
265
00:10:37,770 --> 00:10:40,371
That's why I was
visiting relatives.
266
00:10:40,372 --> 00:10:42,106
Talk, talk, talk.
267
00:10:42,107 --> 00:10:44,141
Oh, I am ravenous.
268
00:10:44,142 --> 00:10:46,443
Did you do a lot of sightseeing?
269
00:10:46,444 --> 00:10:47,679
Enough.
270
00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:49,279
More than enough.
271
00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:50,615
What did you see?
272
00:10:50,616 --> 00:10:51,816
What did I see?
273
00:10:53,585 --> 00:10:56,487
Well, what do you see
when you sightsee?
274
00:10:56,488 --> 00:10:57,822
Sights.
275
00:10:57,823 --> 00:10:59,223
Oh. Yeah, well...
276
00:10:59,224 --> 00:11:00,758
WALDO:
Hello, Samantha.
277
00:11:00,759 --> 00:11:02,926
[COUGHS]
Oh. Waldo.
278
00:11:02,927 --> 00:11:05,028
Uh, Waldo, I'd like you
to meet my husband.
279
00:11:05,029 --> 00:11:06,597
This is Darrin.
How do you do?
280
00:11:06,598 --> 00:11:08,632
This is Larry Tate.
How do you do?
281
00:11:10,969 --> 00:11:12,870
I've heard so much
about you, Darrin.
282
00:11:12,871 --> 00:11:15,039
May I say that you are
a very, very lucky man.
283
00:11:16,308 --> 00:11:18,342
Oh, Waldo and I are old friends.
284
00:11:18,343 --> 00:11:21,178
We practically grew up together.
285
00:11:21,179 --> 00:11:22,746
Like brother and sister.
286
00:11:22,747 --> 00:11:24,214
[COUGHING]
287
00:11:27,519 --> 00:11:28,886
I'm sorry.
288
00:11:28,887 --> 00:11:31,168
It just went down the wrong way.
289
00:11:32,357 --> 00:11:34,692
Waldo, if you don't mind,
290
00:11:34,693 --> 00:11:37,028
we were just about
to order lunch.
291
00:11:37,029 --> 00:11:38,763
Splendid.
I'm famished.
292
00:11:40,165 --> 00:11:41,165
Well...
293
00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:44,068
isn't this cozy?
294
00:11:46,571 --> 00:11:48,272
If you'll excuse me.
295
00:11:49,341 --> 00:11:51,142
I don't feel very well.
296
00:11:51,143 --> 00:11:53,745
I'm going up to
my room and lie down.
297
00:11:53,746 --> 00:11:55,947
Oh, I-I'm sorry, Larry.
298
00:11:55,948 --> 00:11:57,414
Anything I can do?
299
00:11:57,415 --> 00:11:59,316
I certainly hope so.
300
00:12:07,158 --> 00:12:08,926
What's the matter with him?
301
00:12:08,927 --> 00:12:11,929
I don't know. He's just
a bundle of nerves.
302
00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:16,067
S-sweetheart...
303
00:12:16,068 --> 00:12:18,235
maybe you should go up
and see if he's all right.
304
00:12:18,236 --> 00:12:20,437
Yeah, I guess so.
305
00:12:20,438 --> 00:12:22,039
Excuse me.
306
00:12:26,244 --> 00:12:27,712
[IRRITATED] Waldo.
307
00:12:27,713 --> 00:12:30,114
What's the big idea, barging in?
308
00:12:30,115 --> 00:12:31,482
[SIGHS] I just wanted to
309
00:12:31,483 --> 00:12:33,283
meet your husband,
see what you saw in him.
310
00:12:33,284 --> 00:12:35,119
Now that you've met him?
311
00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:36,620
What do you see in him?
312
00:12:37,789 --> 00:12:40,958
Tsk. Honestly.
313
00:12:40,959 --> 00:12:42,693
[♪]
[GROANS]
314
00:12:42,694 --> 00:12:45,029
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
315
00:12:45,030 --> 00:12:46,030
Who is it?
316
00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:47,431
It's Darrin.
317
00:12:48,967 --> 00:12:50,601
Darrin, what are you
doing up here?
318
00:12:50,602 --> 00:12:53,504
You should be downstairs
with them eating your lunch.
319
00:12:53,505 --> 00:12:54,505
What for?
320
00:12:54,506 --> 00:12:56,240
Well, I... I...
321
00:12:56,241 --> 00:12:58,843
I, uh... Well, if you
don't, a stranger's
322
00:12:58,844 --> 00:13:00,811
going to have to
pick up our check.
323
00:13:00,812 --> 00:13:02,980
Larry.
324
00:13:02,981 --> 00:13:05,283
What's bothering you?
325
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:06,984
Bothering me?
Nothing's bothering me.
326
00:13:06,985 --> 00:13:09,053
It's what's bothering you
that's bothering me.
327
00:13:09,054 --> 00:13:11,335
You're not making sense.
328
00:13:12,024 --> 00:13:14,892
Okay. Then here it is
in a nutshell.
329
00:13:16,795 --> 00:13:18,862
Yes?
330
00:13:18,863 --> 00:13:20,363
I don't want to get involved.
331
00:13:22,901 --> 00:13:24,401
In what?
332
00:13:25,503 --> 00:13:27,338
Well, let's put it another way.
333
00:13:27,339 --> 00:13:29,373
If Sam, for example,
334
00:13:29,374 --> 00:13:30,942
happened to run into
an old friend
335
00:13:30,943 --> 00:13:33,211
like Waldo, for example,
336
00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:36,347
at the House of Seven Gables,
for example,
337
00:13:36,348 --> 00:13:39,984
that doesn't necessarily mean
what you think it means.
338
00:13:39,985 --> 00:13:41,819
When did you see them there?
339
00:13:41,820 --> 00:13:43,087
When we were sightseeing.
340
00:13:44,122 --> 00:13:45,422
On the other hand,
341
00:13:45,423 --> 00:13:47,825
it could have been somebody
that looked like her.
342
00:13:47,826 --> 00:13:49,426
Why didn't I think
of that before?
343
00:13:49,427 --> 00:13:51,095
It was somebody
that looked like her.
344
00:13:51,096 --> 00:13:52,296
The light was bad,
345
00:13:52,297 --> 00:13:55,332
and I didn't see
what I thought I saw.
346
00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:58,468
So forget the whole thing.
Go down, enjoy your lunch.
347
00:13:58,469 --> 00:13:59,503
[SIGHS]
348
00:13:59,504 --> 00:14:01,505
Where you going?
349
00:14:01,506 --> 00:14:04,408
I'm sure there's
a simple explanation
350
00:14:04,409 --> 00:14:06,143
to whatever you saw...
351
00:14:06,144 --> 00:14:07,812
so I'm gonna take your advice
352
00:14:07,813 --> 00:14:08,812
and finish my lunch.
353
00:14:08,813 --> 00:14:10,347
[♪]
354
00:14:10,348 --> 00:14:11,849
[DOOR CLOSES]
355
00:14:16,054 --> 00:14:18,689
[♪]
356
00:14:18,690 --> 00:14:19,924
Are you ready for lunch?
357
00:14:19,925 --> 00:14:22,292
Waldo, I can't
have lunch with you.
358
00:14:22,293 --> 00:14:24,928
I really should go upstairs.
359
00:14:24,929 --> 00:14:27,531
And remember,
none of your tricks.
360
00:14:27,532 --> 00:14:30,034
My mother won't like it,
but I promise you, Samantha,
361
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:31,735
none of my tricks.
362
00:14:31,736 --> 00:14:33,403
Thank you. Excuse me.
363
00:14:35,807 --> 00:14:37,327
Good afternoon.
Good afternoon.
364
00:14:47,585 --> 00:14:49,420
Waiter, two more
of the same, please.
365
00:14:56,528 --> 00:14:58,729
[♪]
366
00:15:04,302 --> 00:15:05,669
So...
367
00:15:05,670 --> 00:15:08,139
her husband is
decent and loving.
368
00:15:08,140 --> 00:15:09,439
What about me?
369
00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:13,110
You are intelligent
and sensitive
370
00:15:13,111 --> 00:15:14,245
and vibrant.
371
00:15:14,246 --> 00:15:16,813
That's much better than being
372
00:15:16,814 --> 00:15:18,949
decent and loving.
373
00:15:20,218 --> 00:15:22,920
Then shall we away
to our rendezvous?
374
00:15:22,921 --> 00:15:24,822
You're not "awaying" anyplace.
375
00:15:24,823 --> 00:15:26,324
I want a full explanation of
376
00:15:26,325 --> 00:15:28,159
what's going on here,
or I'm gonna bust...
377
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,161
Oh, stop crowing.
378
00:15:30,162 --> 00:15:31,295
I'm sorry, Samantha,
379
00:15:31,296 --> 00:15:33,230
but I do detest violence.
380
00:15:33,231 --> 00:15:34,498
You had to protect yourself.
381
00:15:34,499 --> 00:15:36,166
[CROW CAWING]
382
00:15:39,237 --> 00:15:41,371
That does it. I quit.
383
00:15:43,074 --> 00:15:46,110
But, Larry, if Darrin left
your room five minutes ago,
384
00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:47,444
where did he go?
385
00:15:47,445 --> 00:15:48,779
He's not in our room.
386
00:15:48,780 --> 00:15:51,081
Well, maybe it's just as well.
387
00:15:51,082 --> 00:15:53,283
Ah, he wasn't
very hungry anyway.
388
00:15:53,284 --> 00:15:55,319
What?
Uh, nothing.
389
00:15:55,320 --> 00:15:57,588
Larry, how are you feeling?
390
00:15:57,589 --> 00:15:59,790
Oh, my... My throat's still
bothering me a little.
391
00:15:59,791 --> 00:16:01,025
But, uh...
392
00:16:01,026 --> 00:16:02,559
don't worry about me, Sam.
393
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:04,495
I'll be all right.
394
00:16:04,496 --> 00:16:06,376
Well, is there anything
I can do to help?
395
00:16:07,765 --> 00:16:10,568
Just, uh, be good to each other.
396
00:16:12,270 --> 00:16:14,571
Well, uh, we'll certainly try.
397
00:16:14,572 --> 00:16:15,739
Uh, bye.
398
00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:17,574
[LINE CLICKS DEAD] [♪]
399
00:16:19,077 --> 00:16:20,677
[CROW CAWING]
400
00:16:36,795 --> 00:16:37,795
[CAWING]
401
00:16:47,972 --> 00:16:49,740
Darrin.
402
00:16:49,741 --> 00:16:51,675
Darrin, is that you?
403
00:16:51,676 --> 00:16:52,876
[CAWING]
404
00:16:57,215 --> 00:16:59,316
Oh, you poor dear.
405
00:17:00,719 --> 00:17:04,188
I-I... I don't blame you
for being upset.
406
00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:07,258
A-and somebody is gonna
pay for this, believe me.
407
00:17:07,259 --> 00:17:08,825
Mother!
408
00:17:08,826 --> 00:17:10,227
[CAWING]
409
00:17:14,399 --> 00:17:15,732
Darrin.
410
00:17:15,733 --> 00:17:16,967
Darrin.
411
00:17:16,968 --> 00:17:18,468
[CAWING]
412
00:17:18,469 --> 00:17:20,270
Well, uh, don't be mad at me.
413
00:17:20,271 --> 00:17:21,671
I had nothing to do with it.
414
00:17:21,672 --> 00:17:23,607
[CAWING]
415
00:17:32,550 --> 00:17:33,917
[CAWING]
416
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:37,821
I-I-I'm sorry, sweetheart.
417
00:17:37,822 --> 00:17:39,923
But I... I only did that
for your own good.
418
00:17:39,924 --> 00:17:41,759
Believe me.
419
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:42,693
[CAWING]
420
00:17:42,694 --> 00:17:44,228
Now, you be patient.
421
00:17:44,229 --> 00:17:47,231
And tonight at the convention,
I'll get to the bottom of this.
422
00:17:48,366 --> 00:17:50,401
[APPLAUSE]
423
00:17:53,538 --> 00:17:56,173
And now for my next encore...
424
00:17:56,174 --> 00:17:57,741
I should like to recite
425
00:17:57,742 --> 00:17:59,810
one of the loveliest
incantations
426
00:17:59,811 --> 00:18:00,978
of our literature:
427
00:18:00,979 --> 00:18:04,614
The spell to bring on
an April shower.
428
00:18:04,615 --> 00:18:06,950
Try this for an encore, Mother.
429
00:18:06,951 --> 00:18:08,785
Please, Samantha.
[CROW CAWING]
430
00:18:08,786 --> 00:18:09,953
I work alone.
431
00:18:09,954 --> 00:18:11,989
Oh, come on. Show them
how clever you are.
432
00:18:11,990 --> 00:18:14,291
Oh, stop waving that
ridiculous bird at me...
433
00:18:14,292 --> 00:18:17,494
Don't you call my husband
a ridiculous bird.
434
00:18:17,495 --> 00:18:20,530
That's Durwood? Oh-ho.
435
00:18:20,531 --> 00:18:22,732
How perfectly divine.
436
00:18:22,733 --> 00:18:25,302
Well, I am not amused.
437
00:18:25,303 --> 00:18:27,237
Now, put him back
the way you found him.
438
00:18:27,238 --> 00:18:28,638
I didn't do it, sweetheart.
439
00:18:28,639 --> 00:18:31,741
Not that I wouldn't have,
had I thought of it.
440
00:18:32,777 --> 00:18:34,477
Well, then...
441
00:18:34,478 --> 00:18:35,512
who did?
442
00:18:35,513 --> 00:18:37,915
I don't know.
But whoever it was,
443
00:18:37,916 --> 00:18:40,417
let's have an ovation for him.
444
00:18:40,418 --> 00:18:42,319
[APPLAUSE] ENDORA: Yes!
445
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:44,955
You should be ashamed
of yourselves.
446
00:18:44,956 --> 00:18:46,023
All of you!
447
00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:49,660
You call yourselves
decent witches?
448
00:18:49,661 --> 00:18:52,463
Bullies, that's what you are!
449
00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:54,798
Where's your sense
of humor, Samantha?
450
00:18:54,799 --> 00:18:58,135
It's just a little
convention high jinks.
451
00:18:58,136 --> 00:19:02,239
We're no worse than
the Shriners or the Elks.
452
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,108
SAMANTHA: Well, I don't
think it's funny.
453
00:19:04,109 --> 00:19:07,978
And I want whoever
did it to undo it.
454
00:19:07,979 --> 00:19:09,213
Pronto!
455
00:19:13,451 --> 00:19:14,718
[MAGIC BOOMS]
456
00:19:14,719 --> 00:19:15,953
Well, what...?
457
00:19:15,954 --> 00:19:18,088
Well, what happened?
Where did they go?
458
00:19:18,089 --> 00:19:20,490
Uh, I-I'm sorry,
sweetheart,
459
00:19:20,491 --> 00:19:23,093
but, uh, they consider this
hallowed ground.
460
00:19:23,094 --> 00:19:24,894
And... well,
you're a...
461
00:19:24,895 --> 00:19:27,264
I know what I am.
462
00:19:27,265 --> 00:19:29,833
Now get me back to
the hotel on the double.
463
00:19:29,834 --> 00:19:31,401
Uh, yes, Darrin.
464
00:19:35,106 --> 00:19:37,607
[♪]
465
00:19:39,944 --> 00:19:41,111
What are you doing?
466
00:19:41,112 --> 00:19:43,113
What I was doing
when I was a bird.
467
00:19:43,114 --> 00:19:44,348
Except faster.
468
00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:46,616
Don't you think
I deserve an explanation?
469
00:19:46,617 --> 00:19:49,153
This afternoon, Larry saw you
470
00:19:49,154 --> 00:19:51,288
and Waldo the warlock
471
00:19:51,289 --> 00:19:52,756
at the House of Seven Gables.
472
00:19:52,757 --> 00:19:54,191
Waldo and me?
473
00:19:54,192 --> 00:19:55,893
That's impossible.
474
00:19:55,894 --> 00:19:57,528
I don't wanna talk
about it anymore.
475
00:19:57,529 --> 00:19:59,896
And I'll go home, cool off
and forgive you.
476
00:20:01,599 --> 00:20:02,933
In a year or two.
477
00:20:04,369 --> 00:20:05,536
Maybe.
478
00:20:05,537 --> 00:20:08,472
[♪]
479
00:20:08,473 --> 00:20:11,375
And you're not even going
to demand an explanation?
480
00:20:12,543 --> 00:20:15,479
Okay. I demand
an explanation.
481
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:17,514
That's better.
482
00:20:17,515 --> 00:20:20,017
Well, go on. Explain.
483
00:20:20,018 --> 00:20:21,418
I can't.
484
00:20:21,419 --> 00:20:23,720
B-but I know
someone who can.
485
00:20:23,721 --> 00:20:25,755
Waldo?
486
00:20:25,756 --> 00:20:27,457
Waldo.
487
00:20:27,458 --> 00:20:29,898
Front and center.
488
00:20:30,929 --> 00:20:32,809
I was expecting your call.
489
00:20:33,631 --> 00:20:36,099
First, may I apologize
490
00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:37,200
for the bird business?
491
00:20:37,201 --> 00:20:40,603
Thanks. From the bottom
of my beak.
492
00:20:41,806 --> 00:20:44,041
Waldo, rumor hath it
493
00:20:44,042 --> 00:20:45,575
that you and I
were seen cavorting
494
00:20:45,576 --> 00:20:47,244
at the House of
Seven Gables today.
495
00:20:47,245 --> 00:20:49,612
Now, I'm gonna ask you nicely
496
00:20:49,613 --> 00:20:51,481
to explain that rumor...
497
00:20:51,482 --> 00:20:55,752
quickly, or I will zap you
into another century.
498
00:20:55,753 --> 00:20:57,087
All right.
499
00:20:57,088 --> 00:20:58,922
I was going to explain anyway.
500
00:20:58,923 --> 00:21:01,124
Sir.
501
00:21:01,125 --> 00:21:03,226
You have your Samantha...
502
00:21:03,227 --> 00:21:04,795
and I have mine.
503
00:21:07,832 --> 00:21:11,473
WALDO: Real to
nobody but myself.
504
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,908
Heh. It's a foolish
fantasy, I know.
505
00:21:17,909 --> 00:21:20,144
But I assure you,
a harmless one.
506
00:21:20,145 --> 00:21:21,711
Oh, Waldo.
507
00:21:21,712 --> 00:21:24,414
It's been almost an hour
since I've seen you.
508
00:21:24,415 --> 00:21:26,683
I've been so lonesome and sad.
509
00:21:26,684 --> 00:21:28,819
Oh, I love you so, Waldo.
510
00:21:28,820 --> 00:21:32,522
I love you with
all my heart and soul.
511
00:21:32,523 --> 00:21:34,525
I love you...
All right.
512
00:21:34,526 --> 00:21:35,992
All right.
That's enough.
513
00:21:37,094 --> 00:21:38,128
Who's that?
514
00:21:39,430 --> 00:21:40,564
Sam.
515
00:21:40,565 --> 00:21:43,300
I'm... I'm sorry.
516
00:21:43,301 --> 00:21:45,235
I'm not.
517
00:21:45,236 --> 00:21:47,356
You're beautiful
when you're jealous.
518
00:21:48,173 --> 00:21:50,273
I knocked, but nobody answered.
519
00:21:50,274 --> 00:21:52,342
Oh, Waldo.
520
00:21:52,343 --> 00:21:54,778
I love you more than
life itself.
521
00:21:54,779 --> 00:21:57,347
I'm sorry, Sam. But this is
something I have to do.
522
00:21:57,348 --> 00:21:59,349
[♪]
523
00:22:01,352 --> 00:22:02,352
[CAWING]
524
00:22:05,190 --> 00:22:06,723
Waldo.
525
00:22:06,724 --> 00:22:09,292
Can't you do anything but crows?
526
00:22:10,495 --> 00:22:11,962
[CAWS]
527
00:22:11,963 --> 00:22:13,897
[♪]
528
00:22:18,035 --> 00:22:20,204
[♪]
529
00:22:21,706 --> 00:22:23,407
Shall I put him
back the way he was?
530
00:22:23,408 --> 00:22:25,041
Not yet.
531
00:22:25,042 --> 00:22:26,042
How will we
532
00:22:26,043 --> 00:22:27,344
explain this to Larry?
533
00:22:27,345 --> 00:22:29,513
Well, sweetheart,
we have a choice.
534
00:22:29,514 --> 00:22:31,248
We could tell him I was having
535
00:22:31,249 --> 00:22:33,083
a mad, impetuous fling.
536
00:22:33,084 --> 00:22:34,651
[CROW CAWS] Sure.
537
00:22:34,652 --> 00:22:37,354
Or we could tell him...
538
00:22:37,355 --> 00:22:38,888
I'm a witch.
539
00:22:38,889 --> 00:22:41,057
Yeah, that would be terrific.
540
00:22:41,058 --> 00:22:42,326
Or...
541
00:22:42,327 --> 00:22:45,629
we could tell him
that was Serena he saw.
542
00:22:45,630 --> 00:22:47,197
That will do it.
543
00:22:47,198 --> 00:22:49,165
Okay, Waldo.
Let's have a Serena.
544
00:22:49,166 --> 00:22:51,268
Must I, Samantha?
545
00:22:51,269 --> 00:22:53,537
I'm not very fond
of your cousin.
546
00:22:53,538 --> 00:22:55,472
Oh, please, Waldo.
547
00:22:55,473 --> 00:22:58,107
A... A blond Serena
dressed just like this.
548
00:22:58,108 --> 00:23:00,177
Like your fantasy Samantha.
549
00:23:00,178 --> 00:23:01,411
Well, that's easier.
550
00:23:01,412 --> 00:23:03,413
[MAGICAL CHIMING]
551
00:23:07,285 --> 00:23:08,451
Yeah. That's
good enough.
552
00:23:08,452 --> 00:23:09,573
Now do him.
553
00:23:12,690 --> 00:23:14,191
What happened?
554
00:23:14,192 --> 00:23:16,459
Uh, well,
uh, y-you led
555
00:23:16,460 --> 00:23:18,395
with a right
cross. And, uh...
556
00:23:18,396 --> 00:23:21,364
And... And Waldo countered
with a karate chop.
557
00:23:21,365 --> 00:23:25,068
He's a very dangerous
uh, person, you know.
558
00:23:25,069 --> 00:23:26,270
I didn't feel a thing.
559
00:23:26,271 --> 00:23:28,432
That's what makes him
so dangerous.
560
00:23:29,540 --> 00:23:32,275
I didn't realize before.
You know something?
561
00:23:32,276 --> 00:23:34,644
When you're knocked out,
you dream.
562
00:23:34,645 --> 00:23:36,413
I thought I was a crow.
563
00:23:38,216 --> 00:23:40,317
Where is he?
I may be down...
564
00:23:40,318 --> 00:23:41,919
but I'm not out.
565
00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:43,887
I'm sorry for the little
566
00:23:43,888 --> 00:23:45,522
misunderstanding, sir.
567
00:23:45,523 --> 00:23:48,057
Oh. May I present
my friend, Serena?
568
00:23:48,058 --> 00:23:49,893
Hi, cotton top.
569
00:23:49,894 --> 00:23:52,929
Serena, your...
Your hair.
570
00:23:52,930 --> 00:23:55,832
Someone said blonds
have more fun.
571
00:23:55,833 --> 00:23:57,967
I thought I'd
find out. Hm-hm.
572
00:23:59,303 --> 00:24:00,937
[LAUGHING]
573
00:24:00,938 --> 00:24:04,174
Oh, Serena.
It was you all the time.
574
00:24:04,175 --> 00:24:05,742
And I thought that...
575
00:24:05,743 --> 00:24:07,744
A perfectly
understandable mistake.
576
00:24:07,745 --> 00:24:10,147
Hm. And you proved
your loyalty.
577
00:24:10,148 --> 00:24:12,382
Uh, where have you two
girls been? To a costume ball?
578
00:24:12,383 --> 00:24:13,917
That's right.
579
00:24:13,918 --> 00:24:14,985
Serena.
580
00:24:14,986 --> 00:24:17,654
I can't tell you
how glad I am to see you.
581
00:24:17,655 --> 00:24:18,689
[MAGIC CHIMING]
582
00:24:21,859 --> 00:24:24,294
[♪]
583
00:24:31,636 --> 00:24:34,337
I don't feel very good.
584
00:24:34,338 --> 00:24:36,973
Could somebody bring me a drink?
585
00:24:36,974 --> 00:24:39,215
How about some Old Crow?
586
00:24:41,946 --> 00:24:42,946
[♪]
587
00:24:42,947 --> 00:24:43,987
[GIGGLES]
588
00:24:46,951 --> 00:24:49,386
[♪]
38994
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