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1
00:00:01,230 --> 00:00:03,678
(Mindy) The best part of living
in New York is the nightlife.
2
00:00:03,679 --> 00:00:04,908
The second best part
is knowing that
3
00:00:04,909 --> 00:00:07,794
Jay-Z and Beyonce are sharing
the same weather as me.
4
00:00:07,795 --> 00:00:09,613
But the best part is the nightlife.
5
00:00:09,631 --> 00:00:11,615
The problem is, you can't
enjoy the nightlife
6
00:00:11,616 --> 00:00:14,334
if your friends are a bunch
of geriatric shut-in lame-os.
7
00:00:14,369 --> 00:00:17,137
Alex, it's your lucky night.
Oh, yeah.
8
00:00:17,171 --> 00:00:20,290
Tonight, my friend, we are going
to have as much fun as the time
9
00:00:20,308 --> 00:00:22,309
that we snuck onto
John Stamos's party bus.
10
00:00:22,343 --> 00:00:25,166
Sounds so cool, but I'm actually
staying in to watch TV tonight...
11
00:00:25,179 --> 00:00:26,680
Oh, well, that sounds pretty fun.
12
00:00:26,731 --> 00:00:28,765
With Danny.
Ugh, gross.
13
00:00:28,766 --> 00:00:30,217
(Danny) Hey, I can hear you.
14
00:00:30,218 --> 00:00:33,303
[Dance music playing]
15
00:00:33,304 --> 00:00:37,357
It's taking off,
so let's go, let's go
16
00:00:37,408 --> 00:00:39,493
Feel that bass in that boom
17
00:00:39,527 --> 00:00:40,777
- Sir?
- Yes?
18
00:00:40,811 --> 00:00:42,164
These are complimentary
wasabi peas, right?
19
00:00:42,165 --> 00:00:44,248
- Yes.
- I'm not gonna get charged for them?
20
00:00:44,282 --> 00:00:45,499
- No.
- Thank you.
21
00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:47,701
- This is kind of a hard place to get into.
- Yeah.
22
00:00:47,702 --> 00:00:48,985
I only got in 'cause I told 'em
23
00:00:48,986 --> 00:00:50,787
that my teenage daughter
was trapped inside.
24
00:00:50,821 --> 00:00:52,205
I don't have a teenage daughter.
25
00:00:52,206 --> 00:00:53,373
I'm not old enough.
26
00:00:53,424 --> 00:00:55,959
Not interested in having
children anytime soon.
27
00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:58,295
Maybe one day.
Whoa.
28
00:01:01,349 --> 00:01:02,616
Did you just... me?
29
00:01:02,650 --> 00:01:08,388
30
00:01:08,423 --> 00:01:09,523
Uh, uh, sorry, sorry.
31
00:01:09,524 --> 00:01:10,524
A good-looking guy
is coming over here.
32
00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:11,892
- Hey!
- Thank you.
33
00:01:11,893 --> 00:01:14,177
34
00:01:14,195 --> 00:01:15,479
Ow! Ow!
35
00:01:15,513 --> 00:01:17,180
Damn it!
I got wasabi in my eye!
36
00:01:17,198 --> 00:01:19,199
Allow me.
37
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:20,484
Whoa.
38
00:01:20,518 --> 00:01:22,069
I'm Adam.
39
00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:23,403
[Both giggle]
40
00:01:23,404 --> 00:01:25,455
And this is how you can get
a parking ticket in Manhattan
41
00:01:25,456 --> 00:01:26,670
without even owning a car.
42
00:01:26,691 --> 00:01:27,691
[Chuckles] Yeah.
43
00:01:27,692 --> 00:01:29,209
I am so excited that I decided
44
00:01:29,210 --> 00:01:31,378
- to come out tonight.
- You know, it's getting pretty late.
45
00:01:31,379 --> 00:01:34,864
You should probably
take me home with you.
46
00:01:34,882 --> 00:01:36,216
[Kissing]
47
00:01:36,217 --> 00:01:39,169
(Mindy) You're really
good at frenching.
48
00:01:39,170 --> 00:01:41,004
I don't... I don't usually
do this kinda thing.
49
00:01:41,005 --> 00:01:42,539
(Adam) I'm glad
that sometimes you do.
50
00:01:42,540 --> 00:01:44,641
You deserve a treat.
Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
51
00:01:44,642 --> 00:01:47,644
- Before we, uh, you know...
- Yeah.
52
00:01:47,645 --> 00:01:49,563
How much you wanna spend?
Hm?
53
00:01:49,597 --> 00:01:51,932
Well, if I stay overnight,
it costs more.
54
00:01:51,933 --> 00:01:54,217
- Mm...
- Oh, my God!
55
00:01:54,218 --> 00:01:55,569
Are you a prostitute?
56
00:01:55,603 --> 00:01:57,354
- Yeah.
- Oh, God.
57
00:01:57,355 --> 00:01:59,323
Oh, God! Oh, God!
58
00:01:59,357 --> 00:02:02,359
[Upbeat music]
59
00:02:02,360 --> 00:02:08,359
60
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:14,004
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
61
00:02:14,005 --> 00:02:15,422
(Adam) How did you not
know I was a prostitute?
62
00:02:15,456 --> 00:02:16,623
Out! Get out!
63
00:02:16,624 --> 00:02:17,741
You came to the bar alone.
64
00:02:17,742 --> 00:02:18,875
You paid for every drink.
65
00:02:18,909 --> 00:02:21,345
You kept talking about
how money is no object.
66
00:02:21,346 --> 00:02:23,714
Sorry, I get tacky
when I get drunk, all right?
67
00:02:23,715 --> 00:02:25,298
And by the way,
you are not supposed to kiss.
68
00:02:25,299 --> 00:02:27,601
That is, like, the number one
rule in pretty woman.
69
00:02:27,635 --> 00:02:29,553
- Get out!
- Ooh, kissing is a big part of what I do.
70
00:02:29,554 --> 00:02:31,421
I'm actually one of the best
mouth guys in the city.
71
00:02:31,439 --> 00:02:32,773
Gross!
Get out, get out.
72
00:02:32,807 --> 00:02:34,358
[Deep breath]
73
00:02:34,359 --> 00:02:36,143
I am never going out again.
74
00:02:36,144 --> 00:02:38,045
(Morgan) Dr. C, I know babies
with better handwriting.
75
00:02:38,079 --> 00:02:39,646
Actual babies.
It's fine, Morgan.
76
00:02:39,647 --> 00:02:41,064
- Hey, guys.
- Whoa.
77
00:02:41,065 --> 00:02:43,450
Looks like someone had a fun night
and is paying for it today.
78
00:02:43,484 --> 00:02:44,868
I don't pay for it, Morgan.
79
00:02:44,869 --> 00:02:46,603
What is that supposed to mean?
80
00:02:46,604 --> 00:02:48,321
Nothin... nothing.
Okay.
81
00:02:48,322 --> 00:02:49,823
Sorry, Morgan.
I'm sorry.
82
00:02:49,874 --> 00:02:51,491
I did nothing unusual last night.
83
00:02:51,542 --> 00:02:53,877
Danny, I have two theater tickets
84
00:02:53,878 --> 00:02:55,579
that I'm not going to use
for Saturday night.
85
00:02:55,580 --> 00:02:56,797
I thought you and Alex could go.
86
00:02:56,831 --> 00:02:58,048
That's really nice.
I can't.
87
00:02:58,049 --> 00:02:59,616
I'm taking Alex to Vermont.
88
00:02:59,617 --> 00:03:00,784
Wow. What are you gonna do next?
89
00:03:00,785 --> 00:03:02,669
Take pottery classes or something?
90
00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:03,804
Ooh, I'll come to that.
91
00:03:03,805 --> 00:03:05,088
What do you want, Deslaurier?
92
00:03:05,122 --> 00:03:07,257
Your package was delivered
to my floor by mistake.
93
00:03:07,291 --> 00:03:09,976
Yankee candle company.
94
00:03:10,011 --> 00:03:11,094
Mindy, how are you?
95
00:03:11,128 --> 00:03:14,097
I'm as good as any other
human in this room.
96
00:03:14,131 --> 00:03:16,767
Why don't you
take Brendan to the play?
97
00:03:16,801 --> 00:03:18,402
That makes no sense,
and he has no interest.
98
00:03:18,403 --> 00:03:20,237
I'm actually very interested
in the theater.
99
00:03:20,238 --> 00:03:22,272
Even bad theater is good theater.
100
00:03:22,306 --> 00:03:23,657
I believe it was
Bertolt Brecht who once...
101
00:03:23,691 --> 00:03:25,692
You see, I think you guys
would have a lot to talk about.
102
00:03:25,743 --> 00:03:27,878
That's strange. We have
no natural rapport, he and I.
103
00:03:27,912 --> 00:03:29,006
- Nothing?
- The theater is meant to be
104
00:03:29,007 --> 00:03:33,166
a shared experience
where people can forget the past
105
00:03:33,201 --> 00:03:36,036
and move on to the future
with a new understanding.
106
00:03:36,037 --> 00:03:37,987
Hey, man.
You guys want a moment?
107
00:03:37,988 --> 00:03:39,089
Hey, cut it out.
108
00:03:39,090 --> 00:03:40,540
And cut it out.
You're fine.
109
00:03:40,591 --> 00:03:42,375
Morgan, you can have these tickets.
110
00:03:42,376 --> 00:03:44,211
- It's your lucky day.
- Oh, my God. Thank you. It is!
111
00:03:44,262 --> 00:03:45,629
Nice to see you again.
112
00:03:45,630 --> 00:03:47,380
Uh, Brendan, we get there at 8:00.
113
00:03:47,381 --> 00:03:49,165
The one thing is,
hold onto your coat,
114
00:03:49,166 --> 00:03:50,650
because they get you
with the coat check.
115
00:03:50,651 --> 00:03:52,469
That's...
116
00:03:52,503 --> 00:03:55,004
I'm not paying 10 bucks
to check a $5 coat.
117
00:03:55,022 --> 00:03:56,840
Maggie, what is your deal?
118
00:03:56,858 --> 00:03:59,025
You usually eat like someone
just rescued you from a life raft.
119
00:03:59,060 --> 00:04:01,645
Had a big breakfast,
real belt-popper.
120
00:04:01,679 --> 00:04:02,979
Okay. Hey.
121
00:04:03,013 --> 00:04:04,231
When you are in Vermont
this weekend,
122
00:04:04,282 --> 00:04:05,365
I need you to go to Ben & Jerry's,
123
00:04:05,366 --> 00:04:07,183
and I want you to get me
a tie-dye mug.
124
00:04:07,201 --> 00:04:08,841
- I wanna put hair clips in it.
- Vermont?
125
00:04:08,853 --> 00:04:10,687
Yeah, when you and Danny
go this weekend.
126
00:04:10,688 --> 00:04:12,739
Alex and Danny are having a party!
127
00:04:12,790 --> 00:04:15,375
God. It feels really good
to get that out there.
128
00:04:15,409 --> 00:04:17,327
- Wait. What?
- It's just a small dinner thing.
129
00:04:17,361 --> 00:04:19,546
Danny and my best friend,
who he met through me,
130
00:04:19,547 --> 00:04:22,215
are hosting a dinner party
that I'm not invited to?
131
00:04:22,250 --> 00:04:23,834
Hey, I barely made the cut.
132
00:04:23,868 --> 00:04:26,002
This person is invited?
No offense.
133
00:04:26,003 --> 00:04:27,304
So what I am supposed to do?
Just, like,
134
00:04:27,305 --> 00:04:30,724
lay in the street like a corpse
while stray dogs nudge my body?
135
00:04:30,758 --> 00:04:32,926
Sometimes you and Gwen
have dinner without us.
136
00:04:32,977 --> 00:04:34,845
Because having dinner
with Gwen in her weird,
137
00:04:34,846 --> 00:04:36,930
haunted mansion in Greenwich
is so much fun.
138
00:04:36,981 --> 00:04:39,349
We definitely talked
about inviting you.
139
00:04:39,383 --> 00:04:41,234
Mm-hmm.
And the answer was no?
140
00:04:41,269 --> 00:04:43,052
Trust me, I was pro.
141
00:04:43,070 --> 00:04:45,772
Okay, then who was con?
142
00:04:45,823 --> 00:04:48,708
Hey, Danny, are you excited
about your trip to Vermont?
143
00:04:48,709 --> 00:04:51,528
I heard the foliage is
beautiful this time of year.
144
00:04:51,562 --> 00:04:53,163
I think you might
be thinking about fall.
145
00:04:53,164 --> 00:04:54,498
I know about your party, you liar.
146
00:04:54,499 --> 00:04:56,249
[Deep breath] Oh, boy. Okay, look.
147
00:04:56,284 --> 00:04:57,734
- Don't try to turn my friends against me...
- Okay, stop hitting me.
148
00:04:57,735 --> 00:04:59,402
- And make them lie.
- Just relax and I'll explain to you.
149
00:04:59,403 --> 00:05:00,921
It's a small dinner.
Is it?
150
00:05:00,922 --> 00:05:02,622
I'm not even adding leaves
to the table.
151
00:05:02,623 --> 00:05:04,407
That's how small it is.
Hey, everybody.
152
00:05:04,408 --> 00:05:05,759
Danny's having a big party
at his house
153
00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:07,377
on Saturday night,
and you're all invited.
154
00:05:07,378 --> 00:05:08,578
Won't that be fun?
Tell all your friends.
155
00:05:08,579 --> 00:05:11,148
No, I'm not having a party, so...
Why would you do that to me?
156
00:05:11,182 --> 00:05:12,465
Danny, how bad could it be?
157
00:05:12,466 --> 00:05:13,967
I'm not gonna be there.
158
00:05:14,018 --> 00:05:15,719
Okay, you're acting like a brat.
159
00:05:15,753 --> 00:05:17,587
Fine. You can come to the party.
160
00:05:17,588 --> 00:05:18,855
I don't wanna go
to your stupid party.
161
00:05:18,856 --> 00:05:20,256
But you know what?
I should've been invited.
162
00:05:20,274 --> 00:05:21,641
I'm sorry I lied to you.
163
00:05:21,642 --> 00:05:23,310
It's just if I invited you,
then you would've
164
00:05:23,311 --> 00:05:24,728
brought one of these guys
that you date.
165
00:05:24,762 --> 00:05:26,029
What do you mean
one of these guys that I date?
166
00:05:26,063 --> 00:05:29,098
The guys that you date
are kinda dicks.
167
00:05:29,116 --> 00:05:30,817
- Excuse me?
- I'm sorry, but it's true.
168
00:05:30,818 --> 00:05:32,435
And I mean, I just
don't want them at my home.
169
00:05:32,436 --> 00:05:33,820
It's like that...
The orthodontist
170
00:05:33,821 --> 00:05:36,294
- who dumped you for the hot, young girl.
- Okay.
171
00:05:36,324 --> 00:05:37,796
The lawyer who had
the secret girlfriend.
172
00:05:37,825 --> 00:05:39,442
Yeah, fine. You cherry-pick
these examples
173
00:05:39,443 --> 00:05:40,610
and you will find flaws
in almost any...
174
00:05:40,628 --> 00:05:44,130
Brendan Deslaurier?
175
00:05:44,131 --> 00:05:47,305
I would never, ever...
176
00:05:47,335 --> 00:05:50,286
I saw you at the hospital with him.
177
00:05:50,287 --> 00:05:51,888
(Danny) You were going at it.
178
00:05:51,889 --> 00:05:54,123
It was gross and unprofessional.
179
00:05:54,124 --> 00:05:59,429
We hooked up once, and then a couple
more times, but then only once.
180
00:05:59,463 --> 00:06:01,815
Okay, look. You know, you guys are
sneaking around behind my back.
181
00:06:01,816 --> 00:06:03,800
You, with an enemy of the practice.
182
00:06:03,818 --> 00:06:04,935
And what did you do?
You guys go home
183
00:06:04,936 --> 00:06:05,936
and you make fun
of my piano playing?
184
00:06:05,937 --> 00:06:07,571
Why would that come up?
It comes up.
185
00:06:07,605 --> 00:06:09,639
I like your piano playing.
Oh, come on, Mindy.
186
00:06:09,640 --> 00:06:11,307
Please.
My piano playing sucks.
187
00:06:11,308 --> 00:06:14,744
I don't like it, and that's
why you weren't invited.
188
00:06:14,745 --> 00:06:15,979
Excuse me, Betsy.
189
00:06:15,997 --> 00:06:17,697
Dr. Lahiri, there's a man
here to see you.
190
00:06:17,698 --> 00:06:21,903
He's handsome like
my Uncle Brent... on easter.
191
00:06:21,904 --> 00:06:23,036
[Ding]
192
00:06:23,087 --> 00:06:24,421
Oh, my God.
193
00:06:24,455 --> 00:06:26,623
[Low] Come here. Come here.
194
00:06:26,624 --> 00:06:28,291
Hey. What are you doing here?
195
00:06:28,325 --> 00:06:29,876
I need my money.
Oh, God.
196
00:06:29,877 --> 00:06:32,088
I know. It's the skeeziest
part of my job.
197
00:06:35,478 --> 00:06:37,647
Please keep
a little bit of distance.
198
00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:38,797
What, you don't trust me?
199
00:06:38,798 --> 00:06:41,767
I don't, Adam the prostitute.
I don't.
200
00:06:43,186 --> 00:06:44,969
Great, and now I
can't even remember my pin
201
00:06:44,970 --> 00:06:47,239
because you smell too good
and it's distracting me.
202
00:06:47,273 --> 00:06:49,024
It's not your birthday, is it?
203
00:06:49,025 --> 00:06:51,026
No.
204
00:06:51,027 --> 00:06:52,327
[Beeping]
205
00:06:52,361 --> 00:06:53,578
You've been having
a rough day, haven't you?
206
00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:54,663
Yes, I have, actually.
207
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:57,029
A prostitute came to my place of
work to shake me down for money.
208
00:06:57,033 --> 00:06:58,650
I get it.
I'm a prostitute!
209
00:06:58,651 --> 00:07:00,202
I'm sorry you've ever
had to interact
210
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,820
- with someone like me in your lifetime.
- Just keep... I'm sorry.
211
00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:03,672
He's not... could you
keep your voice down?
212
00:07:03,706 --> 00:07:05,757
Okay. All right. I've been
having a crappy day, yes.
213
00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:07,008
Not just because of you.
214
00:07:07,009 --> 00:07:08,493
A co-worker was mean to me.
215
00:07:08,494 --> 00:07:10,846
My dry cleaner
called me "sir," so...
216
00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:12,347
I do feel bad about this.
217
00:07:12,381 --> 00:07:15,600
You're way younger than most of
my clients, and a lot cooler.
218
00:07:15,635 --> 00:07:17,636
I mostly end up with
a lot of wealthy invalids.
219
00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:18,937
Okay, all right.
Well, thank you.
220
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,305
I'm not your client, but thank you.
221
00:07:20,306 --> 00:07:22,724
Hey, before you get back
to your really crappy day,
222
00:07:22,775 --> 00:07:23,859
maybe I can make it up to you?
223
00:07:23,893 --> 00:07:25,227
Come over for a cup of coffee?
224
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,528
I live close by.
225
00:07:26,562 --> 00:07:28,530
Absolutely not.
You're right.
226
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:29,848
Stupid idea.
227
00:07:29,849 --> 00:07:33,184
Why you wanna spend any time with
some broke-ass hustler with ADHD?
228
00:07:33,202 --> 00:07:34,903
All right, all right.
229
00:07:34,904 --> 00:07:36,238
Sure.
230
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,373
All right, I'll have
coffee with you.
231
00:07:38,407 --> 00:07:39,708
- All right.
- But coffee is not, like,
232
00:07:39,742 --> 00:07:41,860
some weird code word
for some sex thing is it?
233
00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:43,528
So everyone from the office
is coming?
234
00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:44,796
I lost control of the whole thing.
235
00:07:44,797 --> 00:07:46,465
Now I gotta get all this extra ice.
236
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:47,716
No, I think it's great.
237
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:49,384
I didn't wanna have
a boring dinner party anyway.
238
00:07:49,385 --> 00:07:51,219
- I like that you're opening up.
- And I'm trying.
239
00:07:51,220 --> 00:07:52,704
People always say I'm closed up,
240
00:07:52,705 --> 00:07:54,723
but the thing is, I don't like
people touching my stuff.
241
00:07:54,724 --> 00:07:55,974
You?
Fine. I don't mind.
242
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:59,094
But the rest of them,
your parkers and so on? Aah.
243
00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:02,380
I'm dating a hot doctor
with a great apartment.
244
00:08:02,381 --> 00:08:05,433
Not every night can be us watching
shows about the Panama canal.
245
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,736
- That thing's an engineering marvel.
- Mm.
246
00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:09,404
Alex, hi.
I was hoping you could warn
247
00:08:09,405 --> 00:08:11,022
your bewheelchair'd friend Maggie
248
00:08:11,023 --> 00:08:12,474
that I'll be bringing someone
to the party.
249
00:08:12,508 --> 00:08:14,159
I wouldn't want her to get jealous.
250
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,077
Uh, she's a big girl.
She'll be fine.
251
00:08:16,112 --> 00:08:17,612
Also, Danny,
the janitor wants to know
252
00:08:17,613 --> 00:08:20,465
your party's policy
on small children.
253
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:24,619
[Singsong]
Danny's gonna throw a rager.
254
00:08:24,654 --> 00:08:27,572
(Mindy) I cannot believe that you
have not seen pretty woman.
255
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:30,292
I mean, someone in your line of work,
it should be required viewing.
256
00:08:30,293 --> 00:08:31,910
They do make us watch a video
about what to do
257
00:08:31,911 --> 00:08:34,095
if one of your clients
passes out in the hot tub.
258
00:08:34,096 --> 00:08:36,414
Oh, my God.
259
00:08:36,415 --> 00:08:37,766
[Police siren wailing]
260
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,802
Wow, it's really nice.
261
00:08:40,853 --> 00:08:43,471
Is your building
inside of another building?
262
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:44,940
- Hello.
- Oh, God.
263
00:08:44,974 --> 00:08:47,142
I am Dikembe, Adam's roommate.
264
00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:49,093
Oh.
Dikembe's a taxi driver.
265
00:08:49,094 --> 00:08:50,695
Adam is prostitute.
266
00:08:50,696 --> 00:08:52,280
Yeah, I learned that.
267
00:08:52,315 --> 00:08:55,400
Adam, look at all these trophies.
268
00:08:55,401 --> 00:08:57,602
That's cute. Wait.
269
00:08:57,603 --> 00:08:59,955
- Did you get them from winning sex competitions?
- No.
270
00:08:59,989 --> 00:09:02,541
Those are from singing competitions
I won back in Indiana.
271
00:09:02,575 --> 00:09:04,543
He has the voice of an angel.
272
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:05,710
(Adam) Come on, Dikembe.
273
00:09:05,745 --> 00:09:06,795
Is that true?
Yeah.
274
00:09:06,829 --> 00:09:08,880
That's actually
why I moved out here.
275
00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:10,999
My dream was to become
a singer-songwriter.
276
00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:13,218
Obviously, it's not
playing out that way.
277
00:09:13,252 --> 00:09:15,203
- Well, can you sing something for me?
- Ah, no.
278
00:09:15,204 --> 00:09:17,789
Come on. I came all the way
down to skid row.
279
00:09:17,790 --> 00:09:19,851
All right.
280
00:09:23,846 --> 00:09:27,816
As I went down
in the valley to pray
281
00:09:27,850 --> 00:09:31,636
Good lord, show me the way
282
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:32,938
Oh, my God.
283
00:09:32,939 --> 00:09:34,639
Adam, you are way too talented
284
00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:36,825
- to be doing what you're doing.
- I don't know.
285
00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:39,027
Sometimes I feel like
I'm supposed to be a prostitute.
286
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:40,195
Adam, no. Look.
287
00:09:40,196 --> 00:09:41,496
There are times in our lives
when we have
288
00:09:41,497 --> 00:09:43,331
to take a good hard look
at what we're doing
289
00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:45,200
and see if that is working for us.
290
00:09:45,201 --> 00:09:47,669
And believe me, I have been
doing that a lot recently.
291
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:48,753
- Yeah?
- Yeah, man.
292
00:09:48,788 --> 00:09:50,872
You live across a curtain
from a guy.
293
00:09:50,873 --> 00:09:53,208
I believe there was
a human bone in your hallway.
294
00:09:53,209 --> 00:09:54,876
Something has to change here.
295
00:09:54,877 --> 00:09:57,846
And you know what?
I will help you.
296
00:09:57,880 --> 00:09:59,764
Hey, Danny. I am coming
to your dinner party tonight.
297
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,766
And guess what.
I'm bringing a guest.
298
00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:04,853
He is nice. He is talented.
He is kind.
299
00:10:04,887 --> 00:10:06,388
Mindy, I'm with a patient.
300
00:10:06,389 --> 00:10:07,722
(Mindy) Okay, then why did
you pick up your phone?
301
00:10:07,723 --> 00:10:09,941
Stop being so obsessed with me.
302
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:12,060
You might never have seen
the movie pretty woman.
303
00:10:12,061 --> 00:10:14,195
But today, my friend,
you're gonna live it.
304
00:10:14,230 --> 00:10:15,280
May I join you at the party?
305
00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:17,015
No, Dikembe, you can't.
306
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:18,233
(Mindy) I want you to
look nice for tonight,
307
00:10:18,234 --> 00:10:20,035
so please, buy anything you want.
308
00:10:20,069 --> 00:10:21,069
What am I gonna talk about?
309
00:10:21,070 --> 00:10:22,520
I can't talk about my job.
310
00:10:22,521 --> 00:10:23,738
Talk about your love of music,
311
00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:26,241
or how you met me
and how I changed your life.
312
00:10:26,242 --> 00:10:27,909
But whatever you do,
do not let anyone
313
00:10:27,910 --> 00:10:29,193
treat you like
you're less than them.
314
00:10:29,194 --> 00:10:30,378
Can I help you?
315
00:10:30,413 --> 00:10:32,163
My friend here would
like to buy some clothing,
316
00:10:32,164 --> 00:10:33,965
and I wanna make sure
that you treat him
317
00:10:33,966 --> 00:10:36,217
with the same respect
as everyone else here.
318
00:10:36,252 --> 00:10:39,347
Great. Let me know
if you need anything.
319
00:10:40,372 --> 00:10:42,891
I thought that would be
more of a scene.
320
00:10:42,925 --> 00:10:45,927
[Upbeat rock music]
321
00:10:45,928 --> 00:10:48,980
322
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:50,348
The guests are here.
The food's out.
323
00:10:50,349 --> 00:10:51,599
You're not breaking out in hives.
324
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,278
You, sir, are hosting a party.
325
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:54,552
Yep.
326
00:10:54,553 --> 00:10:55,820
[Knock at door]
327
00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:57,739
Whoo! Yeah.
Hey, buddy.
328
00:10:57,773 --> 00:11:00,075
I brought grandma's
famous chicken wings.
329
00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:02,060
The secret ingredient is love.
330
00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:03,745
I'm kidding, it's whiskey.
331
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:04,996
There's no love involved in these.
332
00:11:05,031 --> 00:11:06,081
Morgan, you're killing me.
333
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,249
I mean, chicken wings, that's
the messiest food in the world.
334
00:11:08,284 --> 00:11:10,418
Okay, relax, Monica from friends.
335
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:12,454
I brought a wet nap.
"A" wet nap?
336
00:11:12,455 --> 00:11:14,622
Yeah.
Hey, Morgan, wing me.
337
00:11:14,623 --> 00:11:16,207
(Danny) No, no, no.
Are you kidding me?
338
00:11:16,208 --> 00:11:17,842
- Sorry.
- (Danny) Hand her the wing!
339
00:11:17,877 --> 00:11:19,761
- Jeremy, how's it going?
- Maggie, hello.
340
00:11:19,795 --> 00:11:21,513
- Yeah, hey.
- Excuse us a second.
341
00:11:21,547 --> 00:11:23,515
I'm really hoping to avoid a scene.
342
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,800
But the fact is, I came
to this party with Tatia.
343
00:11:25,801 --> 00:11:29,020
I'll understand if you feel you
have to leave and gather yourself.
344
00:11:29,055 --> 00:11:31,773
Dude, she is insanely hot.
345
00:11:31,807 --> 00:11:33,358
I'm sorry?
Good for you.
346
00:11:33,392 --> 00:11:35,760
Oh, thank you... for this.
[Chuckles]
347
00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:37,562
Beer, sweetheart?
Oh.
348
00:11:37,563 --> 00:11:40,732
- Let's roll.
- That accent's doing you a lot of favors.
349
00:11:41,817 --> 00:11:43,068
Hello, Dr. L.
350
00:11:43,069 --> 00:11:44,536
This is Adam.
351
00:11:44,570 --> 00:11:46,371
Great. Another male ten.
352
00:11:46,405 --> 00:11:48,540
Just what this party needs.
353
00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:50,208
That's very rude.
I'm sorry.
354
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:52,410
There's just a lot of...
Adam. Hi.
355
00:11:52,411 --> 00:11:53,828
A lot of sausage here.
356
00:11:55,945 --> 00:11:58,100
Wow. Did you see Mindy's date?
He's hot.
357
00:11:58,101 --> 00:11:59,351
No man's hot.
358
00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:00,736
Paul Newman was handsome,
but that's it.
359
00:12:00,770 --> 00:12:02,220
Hey, you two.
This is Adam.
360
00:12:02,238 --> 00:12:03,739
Hey, great place.
361
00:12:03,773 --> 00:12:05,324
Your roof has a window,
362
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,242
- and that's amazing.
- So what do you do for a living, guy?
363
00:12:07,277 --> 00:12:11,246
Adam is a singer-songwriter, and
a very talented one at that.
364
00:12:11,281 --> 00:12:12,364
So what do you do for money?
365
00:12:12,365 --> 00:12:14,733
I, uh...
I have family money.
366
00:12:14,751 --> 00:12:16,918
- Okay.
- Family money, so that's that.
367
00:12:16,953 --> 00:12:19,421
Railroad money, a lot of it.
368
00:12:19,422 --> 00:12:20,756
Railroad money?
They still do that, huh?
369
00:12:20,790 --> 00:12:23,709
Yeah, my family owns
a lot of the major railroads.
370
00:12:23,710 --> 00:12:25,177
Like, the really big ones.
371
00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:28,079
Mostly north-South,
a few east-west.
372
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,598
So all the major directions?
373
00:12:29,632 --> 00:12:31,249
Yeah, I'm tired of talking
about railroads.
374
00:12:31,267 --> 00:12:33,885
Hey! You know,
Danny has a beautiful piano.
375
00:12:33,886 --> 00:12:35,920
Can you play us something?
376
00:12:35,921 --> 00:12:37,889
- Yeah, I think that's a great idea.
- Sure, yeah.
377
00:12:37,890 --> 00:12:38,923
Yeah, I'd love to hear that.
378
00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:40,275
[Deep breath]
379
00:12:41,477 --> 00:12:43,028
[Piano flourish]
380
00:12:43,029 --> 00:12:46,381
That's the most beautiful music
I've ever heard in my life.
381
00:12:46,416 --> 00:12:49,418
[Playing Norah Jones's
Come Away With Me ]
382
00:12:49,419 --> 00:12:51,903
383
00:12:51,904 --> 00:12:55,924
Come away with me
in the night
384
00:12:55,925 --> 00:13:00,045
385
00:13:00,046 --> 00:13:01,413
Come away with me
386
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:02,798
What are you doing?
Get off the piano.
387
00:13:02,832 --> 00:13:04,800
Sorry.
388
00:13:04,801 --> 00:13:06,635
Oh, my God!
389
00:13:06,636 --> 00:13:10,288
You a song
390
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:11,757
[applause]
391
00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:13,958
- Yeah!
- Bravo.
392
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:15,344
Dr. C, I think you should play now.
393
00:13:15,345 --> 00:13:17,813
- Oh, no. No, no, no.
- Yes!
394
00:13:17,814 --> 00:13:20,565
I mean, come on.
Go up there and play!
395
00:13:20,566 --> 00:13:23,301
- Do it!
- I'm not gonna play pop song...
396
00:13:23,302 --> 00:13:25,637
Something a little more classy.
397
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:26,805
Norah Jones is very classy.
398
00:13:26,823 --> 00:13:28,740
[Deep breath]
399
00:13:28,741 --> 00:13:31,693
[Playing Beethoven's fur elise ]
400
00:13:31,694 --> 00:13:36,698
[Playing clumsily]
401
00:13:36,699 --> 00:13:38,834
Beethoven.
402
00:13:38,835 --> 00:13:44,656
[Playing sloppily]
403
00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:46,425
No, I got it.
I got it.
404
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:48,210
"G."
405
00:13:48,211 --> 00:13:49,678
[Playing along]
406
00:13:49,679 --> 00:13:52,497
"K." Thanks.
407
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:55,050
"E."
408
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:56,835
Mindy, get off the piano.
409
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:59,438
- Oh, God!
- Whoa! You gotta stop getting up there.
410
00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:02,641
411
00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:04,276
Yeah! Huh?
412
00:14:04,277 --> 00:14:05,610
Beautiful.
That was amazing.
413
00:14:05,611 --> 00:14:06,945
Adam, you really...
You saved it.
414
00:14:06,946 --> 00:14:08,513
No. Well, he didn't save it.
We were just...
415
00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:11,616
We were jamming there, Morgan.
416
00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:13,819
Hello.
What are you doing?
417
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:15,087
This room's off-limits.
418
00:14:15,088 --> 00:14:17,139
Well, you weren't giving out
tours of your apartment,
419
00:14:17,140 --> 00:14:19,624
and I wanted to see your bedroom,
so I gave myself my own tour.
420
00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:21,576
Terrific.
Tour's over.
421
00:14:21,577 --> 00:14:23,462
This is so cool,
this Spanish language version
422
00:14:23,463 --> 00:14:24,880
of catcher in the rye.
423
00:14:24,881 --> 00:14:27,249
I can kind of understand it,
and I don't speak Spanish.
424
00:14:27,250 --> 00:14:30,034
No, just don't touch my book.
[Speaking Spanish]
425
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:31,670
Going through my stuff.
Don't look at my books, please.
426
00:14:31,671 --> 00:14:32,888
- All right, all right.
- Okay? Don't look at anything in my room.
427
00:14:32,889 --> 00:14:34,506
- Whoa!
- Let's go back in the party.
428
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,708
- Cool view, Danny.
- Don't look at my view. Let's...
429
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,293
Oh. I see a bathroom.
430
00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:39,594
Oh, I hate this.
431
00:14:39,595 --> 00:14:42,214
So you're the, uh...
You're the train guy.
432
00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:45,550
My dad actually, uh,
sold the train business.
433
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:49,571
And then he invested
all the money in minerals.
434
00:14:49,572 --> 00:14:50,772
Shut up.
435
00:14:50,773 --> 00:14:52,574
I am so into minerals!
436
00:14:52,575 --> 00:14:54,643
God, now I have more questions.
437
00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:56,661
This place is amazing.
438
00:14:56,662 --> 00:14:59,080
Oh, my God.
[Laughs]
439
00:14:59,081 --> 00:15:00,565
- What?
- Danny!
440
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,734
Do you have
a dandruff problem, Danny?
441
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,669
Yes, I do.
Sometimes, I do.
442
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,237
Okay, I get it.
I'm gross.
443
00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:09,624
And my dandruff flakes,
they just rain snow everywhere.
444
00:15:09,625 --> 00:15:10,926
I'm sweaty.
445
00:15:10,927 --> 00:15:12,377
I'm really closed off
and everybody hates me.
446
00:15:12,378 --> 00:15:13,845
- I get it.
- Uh, no.
447
00:15:13,846 --> 00:15:15,881
- It's fine.
- I was just teasing you just a little bit
448
00:15:15,882 --> 00:15:17,282
about the dandruff shampoo.
449
00:15:17,283 --> 00:15:19,584
Well, just don't tell Deslaurier.
450
00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:21,353
Okay.
451
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:23,472
I'm sorry that I lied to you
about Brendan.
452
00:15:23,473 --> 00:15:24,940
But frankly, it is
none of your business.
453
00:15:24,941 --> 00:15:27,592
For your information,
the reason I didn't tell you
454
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:30,762
is because he treated me badly
and I was embarrassed.
455
00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:33,365
He treated you badly?
Yeah. Happy?
456
00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:34,766
He's an idiot
for treating you badly.
457
00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:36,468
I mean, he's an idiot
anyway, but...
458
00:15:36,469 --> 00:15:39,488
Thanks.
Well, what about Adam?
459
00:15:39,489 --> 00:15:40,806
He seems like a cool guy.
460
00:15:40,807 --> 00:15:42,874
Maybe.
461
00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:45,443
- Maybe?
- Oh, God.
462
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:47,162
Do you use a washcloth?
463
00:15:47,163 --> 00:15:48,296
This is disgusting.
464
00:15:48,297 --> 00:15:49,447
This is a breeding ground
for bacteria.
465
00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:52,417
Okay, no. I use one side for my
torso and limbs and the other side
466
00:15:52,418 --> 00:15:53,785
for my pits and my feet.
467
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:57,121
How can you tell
which side is which?
468
00:15:57,122 --> 00:15:59,958
Ugh. Gross.
469
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,676
You know what?
You know what's gross
470
00:16:01,677 --> 00:16:03,829
is you left your wine
in the shower.
471
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:04,963
You look thirsty.
472
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,715
You keep playing
your cards right, Aussie,
473
00:16:06,716 --> 00:16:08,650
you could be my last continent.
474
00:16:08,651 --> 00:16:11,135
Danny is not recognizable to me.
475
00:16:11,136 --> 00:16:12,354
I don't know what
you're doing to him,
476
00:16:12,355 --> 00:16:14,973
but, I mean, everyone is over
at his house at a party.
477
00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:16,575
I have never seen that side of him.
478
00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:20,478
Yeah? I've been working
really hard to open him up.
479
00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:23,198
Yeah, I think his ex-wife
really did a number on him.
480
00:16:23,199 --> 00:16:27,068
Wait.
Uh, Danny has an ex-wife?
481
00:16:27,069 --> 00:16:28,703
Yeah.
You knew about that.
482
00:16:28,704 --> 00:16:31,172
No, I didn't.
483
00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:32,674
I was wrong.
484
00:16:32,675 --> 00:16:34,709
He's not the one that was married.
485
00:16:34,710 --> 00:16:36,211
Who was it that was married?
486
00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:37,629
President Obama was married.
487
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,881
Okay.
Alex, Alex, Alex, Alex!
488
00:16:39,882 --> 00:16:41,165
Oh, thank God, there you are.
489
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,634
I really like talking
to all these people.
490
00:16:42,635 --> 00:16:44,135
They're really nice.
I just wish I didn't
491
00:16:44,136 --> 00:16:45,687
have to pretend like
I was someone else.
492
00:16:45,688 --> 00:16:47,806
We don't have to fight right
now in the middle of a party.
493
00:16:47,807 --> 00:16:50,842
I think, Adam, that you should
maybe play some music right now.
494
00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:52,844
That I can do.
Maybe an original?
495
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,178
Excuse me, Mindy.
No!
496
00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:56,347
Adam, great idea.
Just play some music.
497
00:16:56,365 --> 00:16:58,850
Everybody, I have fantastic news.
498
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:01,185
Adam is going to play
an original composition.
499
00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:03,655
So stop talking or fighting
500
00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,874
or whatever you're doing,
and just come over and listen.
501
00:17:05,908 --> 00:17:06,908
We're so lucky.
502
00:17:06,909 --> 00:17:09,961
You got Broadway plays
503
00:17:09,962 --> 00:17:11,463
On one side of town
504
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:14,833
And you got skyscrapers
on the other side of town
505
00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:18,470
And you got subway trains
that go under the town
506
00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:23,875
And you got yellow taxis
to drive you around
507
00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:27,211
What city
am I talking about?
508
00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:28,313
New York?
509
00:17:28,314 --> 00:17:31,399
What city
am I talking about?
510
00:17:31,434 --> 00:17:33,935
You're describing
a lot of different cities.
511
00:17:33,936 --> 00:17:37,138
Say what city
am I talking about?
512
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:39,223
Dallas?
Go to the next part.
513
00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,776
Well, after 9/11
514
00:17:41,777 --> 00:17:42,894
No, no, no, no.
Too soon.
515
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:44,996
No, no, no, stop.
Okay, Adam, stop.
516
00:17:44,997 --> 00:17:46,564
- Hey, Adam, you can't sing this.
- What?
517
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:47,582
This is offensive.
518
00:17:47,583 --> 00:17:50,168
People are not going
to like this song.
519
00:17:50,169 --> 00:17:52,771
No, I get it.
I don't fit in here.
520
00:17:52,772 --> 00:17:54,289
That's not true.
Just play norah Jones.
521
00:17:54,290 --> 00:17:55,907
- Everyone loved that.
- No, it's true. I don't belong here.
522
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,542
- No, you do belong here.
- And apparently... look, guys.
523
00:17:57,543 --> 00:17:58,743
It's all okay.
524
00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:00,411
I've been spending
a lot of time tonight
525
00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:01,763
pretending to be things
that I'm not.
526
00:18:01,764 --> 00:18:03,932
- No.
- Look, it's time I embrace
527
00:18:03,933 --> 00:18:05,517
who I really am.
No, don't.
528
00:18:05,518 --> 00:18:06,968
Please don't embrace who you are.
529
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:08,252
Guys, I'm a prostitute.
530
00:18:08,253 --> 00:18:10,438
What?
[Laughs]
531
00:18:10,439 --> 00:18:11,723
Psych!
532
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:13,775
And as a prostitute,
everyone always thinks
533
00:18:13,809 --> 00:18:16,594
there must be some other thing
that you aspire to be.
534
00:18:16,595 --> 00:18:17,946
But you know what, guys?
535
00:18:17,980 --> 00:18:19,481
I really like being a prostitute.
536
00:18:19,482 --> 00:18:22,233
I get paid to have sex with women.
537
00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:23,735
Don't gesture to me like that.
538
00:18:23,736 --> 00:18:25,770
It's misleading.
I mean, is that so bad?
539
00:18:25,788 --> 00:18:27,572
- Yes, very.
- Yes.
540
00:18:27,573 --> 00:18:28,707
That's bad.
541
00:18:28,708 --> 00:18:31,275
Mindy, I'm gonna go...
Okay.
542
00:18:31,293 --> 00:18:33,111
- But thank you.
- You're welcome. Just please leave.
543
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:35,279
Hey.
544
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,465
(Morgan) Oh, God, no. Stop. Stop.
545
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,501
You gotta be kidding me.
What?
546
00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:48,259
[Door closes]
547
00:18:48,260 --> 00:18:50,512
God, that was a good kiss.
548
00:18:52,463 --> 00:18:54,714
You brought a prostitute
into my home.
549
00:18:54,715 --> 00:18:56,799
My home!
Alleged prostitute.
550
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:58,935
Look at the constitution
for once in your life.
551
00:18:58,936 --> 00:19:00,637
Did you know that
he was a prostitute?
552
00:19:00,638 --> 00:19:04,641
No, absolutely not. No.
Yesterday.
553
00:19:04,642 --> 00:19:07,860
Today, I knew, and I brought
him knowing full well
554
00:19:07,861 --> 00:19:10,647
that he was a prostitute, but I
was going to pretty woman him.
555
00:19:10,648 --> 00:19:12,482
Mindy, he touched my piano.
556
00:19:12,483 --> 00:19:13,616
How was the sex?
557
00:19:13,617 --> 00:19:14,701
Okay, I refuse to answer questions
558
00:19:14,702 --> 00:19:15,735
from people that
I don't know personally.
559
00:19:15,736 --> 00:19:17,436
I'm sorry.
Fine, I'll ask her then.
560
00:19:17,437 --> 00:19:18,488
How was the sex?
561
00:19:18,489 --> 00:19:19,622
I didn't have sex with him!
562
00:19:19,623 --> 00:19:21,991
Everybody, give Dr. L a break.
563
00:19:22,042 --> 00:19:23,910
- Thank you, Beverly.
- We've all done it.
564
00:19:23,911 --> 00:19:24,953
- No.
- For me,
565
00:19:24,954 --> 00:19:27,413
it was Christmas time
during the war.
566
00:19:27,414 --> 00:19:29,132
They had just hung Saddam.
567
00:19:29,133 --> 00:19:30,383
Okay, I'm gonna
shut this down right now.
568
00:19:30,384 --> 00:19:32,168
I'm hungry.
Morgan, wing me.
569
00:19:32,169 --> 00:19:34,470
- Morgan, hand her the wing!
- I'm sorry.
570
00:19:34,471 --> 00:19:36,422
Wonder where my subway card is.
571
00:19:36,423 --> 00:19:38,141
I gotta get some food.
572
00:19:40,261 --> 00:19:41,394
Hey, where are you going?
573
00:19:41,395 --> 00:19:42,845
Hey!
Where are you going?
574
00:19:42,846 --> 00:19:44,397
Hey, Danny, great party.
575
00:19:44,398 --> 00:19:46,316
You're about to leave?
Are you smoking?
576
00:19:46,317 --> 00:19:47,734
Yeah, I'm smoking.
577
00:19:47,735 --> 00:19:50,153
At least there's one or two
things you don't know about me.
578
00:19:50,154 --> 00:19:51,187
You should know better.
579
00:19:51,188 --> 00:19:52,355
You're poisoning yourself.
580
00:19:52,356 --> 00:19:55,024
Are you really giving me
life advice right now?
581
00:19:55,075 --> 00:19:56,859
Seriously?
Okay, fair enough.
582
00:19:56,860 --> 00:19:59,162
So Alex and I broke up tonight,
in case you didn't know.
583
00:19:59,163 --> 00:20:01,814
You decided to tell her about my
ex-wife in the middle of the party.
584
00:20:01,815 --> 00:20:04,200
Why did you do that?
That was really stupid.
585
00:20:04,201 --> 00:20:06,286
- I am sorry to hear that...
- Yeah, okay.
586
00:20:06,287 --> 00:20:07,587
But I think it is crazy
587
00:20:07,588 --> 00:20:09,205
that you would not tell her
about your ex-wife.
588
00:20:09,256 --> 00:20:11,007
[Chuckles] What? What's so funny?
589
00:20:11,008 --> 00:20:12,709
You're unbelievable to me.
590
00:20:12,710 --> 00:20:15,161
You brought a prostitute
to my party, which you ruined,
591
00:20:15,162 --> 00:20:16,329
and you still have the confidence
592
00:20:16,330 --> 00:20:17,880
to stand there
with your hand on your hip
593
00:20:17,931 --> 00:20:19,349
and tell me what's wrong
with my life?
594
00:20:19,350 --> 00:20:20,967
I'm sorry, Mindy.
That's just funny to me.
595
00:20:20,968 --> 00:20:22,051
I was just trying to be
a good friend.
596
00:20:22,102 --> 00:20:24,053
I didn't ask to be your friend.
597
00:20:24,054 --> 00:20:27,807
(Parker) Ahem. Uh, Dr. C?
598
00:20:27,808 --> 00:20:29,392
- (Danny) Parker, what is it?
- Sorry to interrupt.
599
00:20:29,443 --> 00:20:33,896
One of the Australians may have set
a small fire inside your piano.
600
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:38,401
Are you mad because
601
00:20:38,402 --> 00:20:40,402
- you looked like a fool at the party?
- Did I really look that bad?
602
00:20:40,403 --> 00:20:41,904
You looked... it was bad.
It was a bad one.
603
00:20:41,905 --> 00:20:43,456
Why would I think
it was a good idea
604
00:20:43,457 --> 00:20:45,742
to pretty woman
some male prostitute?
605
00:20:45,793 --> 00:20:48,544
You always take chances
on people who no one else will.
606
00:20:48,545 --> 00:20:50,363
Like, me...
Super good-looking guy,
607
00:20:50,364 --> 00:20:52,999
very strong, but kind of a dirtbag.
608
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:56,002
And now, I own my own laptop.
609
00:20:56,003 --> 00:20:58,054
It's the biggest laptop
you've er seen.
610
00:20:58,055 --> 00:20:59,872
Do you know what Danny told me?
611
00:20:59,873 --> 00:21:03,343
He says that I only go out
with guys who are dis.
612
00:21:03,344 --> 00:21:04,877
[Chuckles] And you know what?
613
00:21:04,878 --> 00:21:05,928
I think he's right.
614
00:21:05,929 --> 00:21:08,348
Ah. He would know.
What does that mean?
615
00:21:08,349 --> 00:21:09,982
Well, I can only say this
because Dr. Castellano
616
00:21:09,983 --> 00:21:11,267
is, like, my best friend.
617
00:21:11,268 --> 00:21:13,569
But he's a rich doctor
with a ton of friends,
618
00:21:13,570 --> 00:21:15,772
and he should maybe smile for once.
619
00:21:15,773 --> 00:21:19,442
Instead, he's like,
"uh, everyone keep it down.
620
00:21:19,443 --> 00:21:21,110
I'm trying to read
the sports section."
621
00:21:21,161 --> 00:21:23,029
"Uh, works starts at 9:00.
622
00:21:23,030 --> 00:21:26,199
Not 9:01. Not 9:02."
623
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:29,035
"There's two flavors for coffee:
Cream and sugar."
624
00:21:29,036 --> 00:21:31,821
[Both groaning mockingly]
625
00:21:31,822 --> 00:21:35,860
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.Addic7ed.Com/
626
00:21:35,910 --> 00:21:40,460
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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