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1
00:00:03,110 --> 00:00:05,000
Estimated wait time:
2
00:00:05,485 --> 00:00:07,879
3 hours and 20 minutes.
3
00:00:07,879 --> 00:00:10,379
There will be no Wi-Fi accesson the ice.
4
00:00:10,447 --> 00:00:11,948
Josh, I can't.
I can't.
5
00:00:12,015 --> 00:00:13,415
I could faint.
I've been waiting too long.
6
00:00:13,483 --> 00:00:14,717
Please, my blood sugar.
7
00:00:14,785 --> 00:00:16,452
You don't look like the type
of girl that could faint.
8
00:00:16,519 --> 00:00:18,587
- What? What does that mean?
- I--look.
9
00:00:18,738 --> 00:00:20,005
I'm not happy
about this either.
10
00:00:20,006 --> 00:00:21,639
I spent all night
sharpening my skates.
11
00:00:21,674 --> 00:00:23,041
Cut a rib eye
with these things.
12
00:00:23,075 --> 00:00:25,376
ANNOUNCER: There is no divisivepolitical language on the ice.
13
00:00:25,411 --> 00:00:27,045
- Okay, let's go. Come on.
- Yeah?
14
00:00:27,079 --> 00:00:28,646
Yep, we're leaving.
Executive decision.
15
00:00:28,681 --> 00:00:30,882
Oh, my boyfriend's
an executive.
16
00:00:30,916 --> 00:00:34,619
(Norah Jones)
waited till I saw the sun
17
00:00:34,653 --> 00:00:37,055
So for the next hour,
the Fairview Municipal Rink
18
00:00:37,089 --> 00:00:38,423
is all ours.
19
00:00:38,457 --> 00:00:39,791
Josh, this is incredible.
20
00:00:39,825 --> 00:00:41,059
I don't know
how you did this.
21
00:00:41,093 --> 00:00:42,460
You know what?
Don't even tell me.
22
00:00:42,495 --> 00:00:43,962
Gave the guy a hundo.
23
00:00:44,496 --> 00:00:45,930
Would've gone 250.
Didn't have to.
24
00:00:45,965 --> 00:00:47,332
You don't have to tell me
how much it costs.
25
00:00:47,366 --> 00:00:49,234
It's amazing.
Let's just skate.
26
00:00:49,268 --> 00:00:52,103
(Norah Jones)
I didn't come
27
00:00:52,137 --> 00:00:53,338
I don't know why
28
00:00:53,372 --> 00:00:54,339
- You're good.
- Yeah?
29
00:00:54,373 --> 00:00:55,340
Yeah,
you're pretty good.
30
00:00:55,374 --> 00:00:56,941
I may have practiced.
31
00:00:56,976 --> 00:00:59,310
- Pretty cool, right?
[Laughs] Yeah, really cool.
32
00:00:59,345 --> 00:01:02,113
When I saw
the break of day
33
00:01:02,147 --> 00:01:03,815
[Buzzer]
34
00:01:03,849 --> 00:01:07,118
[2 Unlimited's
Get Ready For This]
35
00:01:07,152 --> 00:01:09,287
Whoa! Okay, okay.
36
00:01:09,321 --> 00:01:11,489
I guess the guy I gave money to
was just some guy.
37
00:01:11,524 --> 00:01:12,857
Oh, it's okay.
38
00:01:12,892 --> 00:01:14,926
As long as I'm with you,
Josh, doesn't matter.
39
00:01:14,960 --> 00:01:16,927
It's still romantic. Oh, God.
Oh, God, they're swarming.
40
00:01:16,928 --> 00:01:18,363
Fellas, I paid
for the time here!
41
00:01:18,397 --> 00:01:20,098
- Can you protect me or something?
- Get off the ice!
42
00:01:20,132 --> 00:01:21,799
Oh, God.
Ah, gah!
43
00:01:21,834 --> 00:01:23,101
Ow.
44
00:01:23,135 --> 00:01:24,102
Ugh!
[Groans]
45
00:01:24,136 --> 00:01:25,670
God.
46
00:01:25,704 --> 00:01:26,971
Still having fun,
right?
47
00:01:28,974 --> 00:01:31,876
[Hip-hop music]
48
00:01:31,911 --> 00:01:37,682
[Woman vocalizing]
49
00:01:37,716 --> 00:01:38,716
50
00:01:38,717 --> 00:01:43,721
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
51
00:01:43,722 --> 00:01:46,691
[The Waitresses'
Christmas Wrapping]
52
00:01:46,725 --> 00:01:51,362
53
00:01:51,397 --> 00:01:53,464
calendar picture,
frozen landscape
54
00:01:53,499 --> 00:01:56,134
So we're just gonna sit here
and listen to Christmas music?
55
00:01:56,168 --> 00:01:58,169
Well, Danny,
we are discussing
56
00:01:58,203 --> 00:01:59,504
the annual
Christmas party,
57
00:01:59,538 --> 00:02:01,339
and I thought it would help
to set the mood.
58
00:02:01,373 --> 00:02:03,641
Would have been good
to go for lunch
59
00:02:03,676 --> 00:02:04,876
I don't need to be
in the mood for things.
60
00:02:04,910 --> 00:02:05,877
I just do 'em.
[Music shuts off]
61
00:02:05,911 --> 00:02:07,745
I didn't mind that.
It was cozy.
62
00:02:07,780 --> 00:02:09,881
All right,
this is our first Christmas
63
00:02:09,915 --> 00:02:11,783
as heads of this practice,
64
00:02:11,817 --> 00:02:13,518
and it is important
that we do it right.
65
00:02:13,552 --> 00:02:15,420
That is why
Josh and I have volunteered
66
00:02:15,454 --> 00:02:17,822
to host the annual
Christmas party at my apartment.
67
00:02:17,856 --> 00:02:19,891
Ooh, mindy,
you know how you get
68
00:02:19,925 --> 00:02:21,225
at Christmas parties.
69
00:02:21,260 --> 00:02:23,861
Last year, you passed out
inside the food drive box.
70
00:02:23,896 --> 00:02:25,163
First of all,
I was just resting there
71
00:02:25,197 --> 00:02:26,864
because I had had a little bit
too much to drink.
72
00:02:26,899 --> 00:02:29,500
Not a defense--just
a description of what happened.
73
00:02:29,535 --> 00:02:30,735
And second of all,
I am not the same person
74
00:02:30,769 --> 00:02:32,170
that I was last year,
all right, guys?
75
00:02:32,204 --> 00:02:34,105
I am a owner
of a small business.
76
00:02:34,139 --> 00:02:35,840
Co-owner.
All of us are, yeah.
77
00:02:35,874 --> 00:02:37,475
And I am
in a stable relationship
78
00:02:37,509 --> 00:02:40,912
with a handsome, wealthy
attorney at law, esquire.
79
00:02:40,946 --> 00:02:42,046
We never even met this guy.
80
00:02:42,081 --> 00:02:43,214
I mean, are we sure
that he's even real?
81
00:02:43,248 --> 00:02:44,582
Maybe he's real
in the same way
82
00:02:44,617 --> 00:02:46,384
that Santa Claus
is real, Danny...
83
00:02:46,418 --> 00:02:47,418
In our hearts.
84
00:02:47,453 --> 00:02:48,853
No, no, no,
he is not real
85
00:02:48,887 --> 00:02:50,488
in the way
that Santa Claus is real.
86
00:02:50,522 --> 00:02:52,357
He is real like I had sex
with him this morning.
87
00:02:52,391 --> 00:02:53,524
Whoa, that's unnecessary.
Okay, that's too much.
88
00:02:53,559 --> 00:02:54,859
Fine, fine.
Yeah, yeah, okay?
89
00:02:54,893 --> 00:02:56,628
Have the party
at your "Hello Kitty" dorm room
90
00:02:56,662 --> 00:02:58,029
with your little boyfriend.
91
00:02:58,063 --> 00:02:59,864
I never go
to the Christmas party anyway.
92
00:02:59,898 --> 00:03:01,199
So...
93
00:03:01,233 --> 00:03:03,534
Does this cover my share?
94
00:03:03,569 --> 00:03:05,670
Hey, Danny,
please don't throw 20s at me
95
00:03:05,704 --> 00:03:06,738
like I'm doing lap dances.
96
00:03:06,772 --> 00:03:07,905
You're a partner here.
97
00:03:07,940 --> 00:03:09,407
The least you can do
is show up to the party.
98
00:03:09,441 --> 00:03:10,708
And, actually,
you should do more,
99
00:03:10,743 --> 00:03:11,709
like contribute something.
100
00:03:11,744 --> 00:03:12,910
You could do
the party playlist.
101
00:03:12,945 --> 00:03:14,479
No, never again.
I did that once,
102
00:03:14,513 --> 00:03:16,481
and I didn't put enough
Rihanna songs on it,
103
00:03:16,515 --> 00:03:18,449
and I'm party Hitler
all of a sudden.
104
00:03:18,484 --> 00:03:20,051
To be clear,
there was no rihanna on it.
105
00:03:20,085 --> 00:03:22,220
It was simply three hours
of listening to...
106
00:03:22,254 --> 00:03:23,254
Jakob Dylan's dad?
107
00:03:23,288 --> 00:03:24,489
Bob Dylan.
108
00:03:24,523 --> 00:03:26,324
Okay...cool.
109
00:03:26,358 --> 00:03:27,592
How about I bring
a gingerbread house?
110
00:03:28,126 --> 00:03:30,094
- Okay, that would be great.
- Perfect.
111
00:03:30,129 --> 00:03:31,963
Guys, this was a great meeting.
Meeting adjourned.
112
00:03:31,997 --> 00:03:34,866
[Holiday music]
113
00:03:34,900 --> 00:03:36,567
Hey,
you look great.
114
00:03:36,602 --> 00:03:37,669
[Doorbell rings]
115
00:03:37,703 --> 00:03:38,836
Great.
116
00:03:38,871 --> 00:03:40,638
Oh,
what a happy time of year
117
00:03:40,673 --> 00:03:42,640
when the little snowflakes
reappear
118
00:03:42,675 --> 00:03:43,975
Oh!
119
00:03:44,009 --> 00:03:45,276
- Hey, Morgan.
- Hey--mm.
120
00:03:45,310 --> 00:03:46,778
Uh, that was unexpected.
121
00:03:46,812 --> 00:03:48,880
You're looking
very Christmas-y.
122
00:03:48,914 --> 00:03:49,947
Yes, I am.
123
00:03:49,982 --> 00:03:50,948
Did you bring karaoke?
124
00:03:50,983 --> 00:03:51,949
Oh, yeah!
125
00:03:51,984 --> 00:03:52,950
Awesome.
126
00:03:52,985 --> 00:03:54,352
Fun fact--
127
00:03:54,386 --> 00:03:55,486
only plays songs
in Spanish
128
00:03:55,521 --> 00:03:57,288
because I found it
in the garbage
129
00:03:57,322 --> 00:03:58,990
behind a Mexican restaurant.
130
00:03:59,024 --> 00:04:00,091
Cool.
131
00:04:00,125 --> 00:04:02,326
It's Christmastime
132
00:04:02,361 --> 00:04:03,995
Shauna! I am so glad
you're here.
133
00:04:04,029 --> 00:04:05,830
Now it's just like
we're at work.
134
00:04:05,864 --> 00:04:07,265
- Hey, Bets.
- Hey, Dr. L.
135
00:04:07,299 --> 00:04:08,700
- Hi!
- Merry Christmas.
136
00:04:08,734 --> 00:04:10,301
Merry Christmas.
This is my boyfriend,
137
00:04:10,335 --> 00:04:12,303
- Officer Stassen.
- I'm Barry.
138
00:04:12,337 --> 00:04:14,005
- Whoa. Hi.
- Hi.
139
00:04:14,039 --> 00:04:15,506
[Whispering]
He's hot.
140
00:04:15,541 --> 00:04:16,607
[Elevator bell dings]
What the hell are you wearing?
141
00:04:16,642 --> 00:04:18,476
You look very religious.
142
00:04:18,510 --> 00:04:20,144
- I mean, you're not gonna dresslike
this at work, right?- Oh, no.
143
00:04:20,179 --> 00:04:22,513
We have, like, a levelof cool at the office
144
00:04:22,548 --> 00:04:24,015
that I want you to...
145
00:04:24,049 --> 00:04:25,717
Oh, my God.
146
00:04:25,751 --> 00:04:28,019
- Hey.
[Laughs] - Hi!
147
00:04:28,053 --> 00:04:29,120
I didn't even know
you were gonna show up
148
00:04:29,154 --> 00:04:30,288
at the party,
let alone bring
149
00:04:30,322 --> 00:04:31,723
the most beautiful
gingerbread house
150
00:04:31,757 --> 00:04:33,191
I've ever seen.
151
00:04:33,225 --> 00:04:35,393
Oh...Thanks.
152
00:04:35,427 --> 00:04:36,894
It's my take on
the Hansel and Gretel cottage.
153
00:04:36,929 --> 00:04:38,029
I love it.
154
00:04:38,563 --> 00:04:40,331
Cool.
I made it myself, so...
155
00:04:40,365 --> 00:04:42,734
I just--I came to just
drop it off,
156
00:04:42,768 --> 00:04:44,035
then I got to split.
157
00:04:44,069 --> 00:04:45,103
No, you're not
going anywhere.
158
00:04:45,137 --> 00:04:46,370
You're, like,
cool to me now...
159
00:04:46,405 --> 00:04:48,372
I mean, until you
say something weird.
160
00:04:48,407 --> 00:04:50,208
No, no.
You have to stay for a drink.
161
00:04:50,242 --> 00:04:51,309
All right,
I'll have one drink.
162
00:04:51,343 --> 00:04:52,410
Cool. Sure.
163
00:04:52,444 --> 00:04:53,878
Hey, hey,
that's not for eating.
164
00:04:53,912 --> 00:04:56,147
Well, it's too small
for living in, isn't it?
165
00:04:56,181 --> 00:04:58,583
It's so beautiful, Danny.
166
00:04:58,617 --> 00:05:00,218
What's everybodylooking at?
167
00:05:00,252 --> 00:05:03,221
[Rihanna's Rude Boy]
168
00:05:03,255 --> 00:05:06,124
169
00:05:06,158 --> 00:05:08,860
He looks like an example photo
at the barbershop.
170
00:05:08,894 --> 00:05:11,529
Come here, rude boy,
boy, can you get it? Get it?
171
00:05:11,563 --> 00:05:13,698
come here, rude boy,
boy, is you is enough?
172
00:05:13,732 --> 00:05:15,366
take it, take it, baby
173
00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:16,968
Damn.
174
00:05:17,002 --> 00:05:18,469
Take it, take it,
love me, love me
175
00:05:18,504 --> 00:05:19,737
This is Josh.
176
00:05:19,772 --> 00:05:22,073
Everyone, everyone,
this is Josh, my boyfriend.
177
00:05:22,107 --> 00:05:24,442
Yep, he's really real.
178
00:05:24,476 --> 00:05:25,676
He's not fake,
as some of you would say.
179
00:05:25,711 --> 00:05:26,677
Honey, look over to the side,
so they can see you.
180
00:05:26,712 --> 00:05:27,979
Okay, all right.
181
00:05:28,013 --> 00:05:28,980
You don't know this,
but the insulation's
182
00:05:29,014 --> 00:05:32,717
made of cotton candy, so...
183
00:05:32,751 --> 00:05:34,886
Oh, everybody's looking
at some guy.
184
00:05:37,256 --> 00:05:39,557
Hey.
Are you heading out already?
185
00:05:39,591 --> 00:05:41,425
Yeah, I got to go meet up
with someone.
186
00:05:41,460 --> 00:05:42,660
Ooh.
187
00:05:42,694 --> 00:05:44,996
You're not the only one
dating somebody.
188
00:05:45,030 --> 00:05:46,697
Yeah, I can see that.
189
00:05:46,732 --> 00:05:47,899
Wait, wait, before you go,
190
00:05:47,933 --> 00:05:50,168
you have to tell me
a little bit about her.
191
00:05:50,202 --> 00:05:52,236
What is she like?
Female you?
192
00:05:52,271 --> 00:05:54,705
[Sighs]
No, not at all.
193
00:05:54,740 --> 00:05:56,207
Oh, she sounds cool.
194
00:05:56,241 --> 00:05:57,241
Hey.
195
00:05:57,276 --> 00:05:58,910
I'm sorry.
It came out wrong.
196
00:05:58,944 --> 00:06:00,044
Uh-huh.
197
00:06:00,078 --> 00:06:01,646
Thank you so much
for coming, Danny.
198
00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:03,681
- I didn't think you were gonna show up.
- You're welcome.
199
00:06:03,715 --> 00:06:05,850
You are released
for your hot date.
200
00:06:05,884 --> 00:06:07,552
Thank you.
201
00:06:07,586 --> 00:06:10,388
Oh, God, two messages.
I hope it's not a delivery.
202
00:06:10,422 --> 00:06:11,923
- Can you help me find my coat?
- Yeah, okay.
203
00:06:11,957 --> 00:06:13,958
- You have two unheard messages.
- you hiding it?
204
00:06:13,992 --> 00:06:15,626
Yeah, Danny,
I'm hiding your coat.
205
00:06:15,661 --> 00:06:17,328
(Woman)Hi, Josh.How's San Antonio?
206
00:06:17,362 --> 00:06:20,464
I'm just lying herein bed without you.
207
00:06:20,499 --> 00:06:22,166
I can't waittill you're back home.
208
00:06:22,201 --> 00:06:24,836
Love you.[Smooches]
209
00:06:26,839 --> 00:06:28,439
I don't think
that's your phone.
210
00:06:30,735 --> 00:06:32,102
Don't play it again.
211
00:06:32,137 --> 00:06:34,504
(Woman)Hi, Josh.How's San Antonio?
212
00:06:34,839 --> 00:06:37,907
I'm just lying herein bed without you.
213
00:06:37,942 --> 00:06:39,375
I can't waittill you're back home.
214
00:06:39,410 --> 00:06:40,643
Love you.[Smooches]
215
00:06:40,678 --> 00:06:41,911
Mindy, don't jump
to conclusions.
216
00:06:41,946 --> 00:06:43,146
You don't know
the whole situation.
217
00:06:43,180 --> 00:06:44,681
The situation, Danny,
is that my boyfriend
218
00:06:44,715 --> 00:06:45,915
- is cheating on me.
- Now, come on.
219
00:06:45,950 --> 00:06:48,418
The--the lying in bed,
the whole San Antonio of it all.
220
00:06:48,452 --> 00:06:49,452
There's
a million different--
221
00:06:49,987 --> 00:06:51,120
Yep, he cheated on you.
222
00:06:51,655 --> 00:06:54,223
Okay, uh, Danny,
you should head to your party
223
00:06:54,257 --> 00:06:56,826
because, uh, I'm gonna go murder
my boyfriend.
224
00:06:56,860 --> 00:06:58,561
You will probably read about it
in the New York Post tomorrow.
225
00:06:58,595 --> 00:07:00,296
The headline
will probably be a pun
226
00:07:00,330 --> 00:07:01,597
on the word "slay."
227
00:07:01,631 --> 00:07:03,432
No, whoa.
No, no, no, no, no.
228
00:07:03,467 --> 00:07:04,900
You got to play it cool.
You got to play--
229
00:07:04,935 --> 00:07:06,469
- I don't want to play it cool.
- Mindy, play it cool.
230
00:07:06,503 --> 00:07:08,404
You go out there right now--
listen to me, listen to me.
231
00:07:08,438 --> 00:07:09,538
- Yeah.
- You go out there right now,
232
00:07:09,573 --> 00:07:10,873
you make a big scene,
233
00:07:10,907 --> 00:07:12,141
you're gonna ruin
your Christmas party.
234
00:07:12,175 --> 00:07:13,943
- Danny, who cares?
- The staff cares.
235
00:07:13,977 --> 00:07:15,044
Just get
through the party
236
00:07:15,078 --> 00:07:16,445
and work it out
with Josh later, okay?
237
00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:18,481
Don't play it again.
238
00:07:19,950 --> 00:07:22,918
[Singing in Spanish]
239
00:07:22,953 --> 00:07:24,553
240
00:07:28,191 --> 00:07:29,825
I put up posters
all over my neighborhood,
241
00:07:29,860 --> 00:07:31,293
but no one has claimed it.
242
00:07:31,328 --> 00:07:33,863
Should I turn it in
to the police?
243
00:07:33,897 --> 00:07:35,831
Betsy, my two cents--
244
00:07:35,866 --> 00:07:37,867
you've done
your civic duty.
245
00:07:37,901 --> 00:07:39,268
Keep the umbrella.
246
00:07:39,302 --> 00:07:40,770
You see, Shauna,
this is the type of girl
247
00:07:40,804 --> 00:07:42,238
that you should be
hanging out with.
248
00:07:42,272 --> 00:07:45,074
[Giggles]
249
00:07:45,108 --> 00:07:47,176
(Jeremy)I don't understand how you candrink so many energy drinks.
250
00:07:47,210 --> 00:07:49,378
It's not a problem, as long
as you drink a glass of milk...
251
00:07:49,413 --> 00:07:50,780
- Milk.
- Every three hours.
252
00:07:50,814 --> 00:07:52,448
Yeah, keeps your heart
from exploding.
253
00:07:52,482 --> 00:07:54,817
My theory. Hi.
254
00:07:54,851 --> 00:07:56,218
Hey, babe.
255
00:07:59,189 --> 00:08:00,556
Easy, babe.
256
00:08:00,590 --> 00:08:03,025
That's my lucky shirt
for clients' paternity hearings.
257
00:08:03,060 --> 00:08:04,026
Eight for ten
in this puppy.
258
00:08:04,061 --> 00:08:05,795
- Nice.
- I'm so sorry, Josh.
259
00:08:05,829 --> 00:08:07,496
I know when you have
something really nice,
260
00:08:07,531 --> 00:08:09,331
you wouldn't want
to wreck it.
261
00:08:09,366 --> 00:08:11,133
Well, that's one way
of putting it.
262
00:08:11,168 --> 00:08:12,835
- Mm-hmm.
- Kind of a weird way.
263
00:08:12,869 --> 00:08:14,170
How's everybody doing?
Good? Mindy?
264
00:08:14,204 --> 00:08:15,838
We good?
So good.
265
00:08:15,872 --> 00:08:16,839
Great.
266
00:08:16,873 --> 00:08:17,973
Josh, did you know
267
00:08:18,008 --> 00:08:20,042
that Jeremy and I
used to have a thing?
268
00:08:20,077 --> 00:08:21,911
(Danny)Oh, God.
269
00:08:21,945 --> 00:08:23,145
Uh, no.
Didn't know that.
270
00:08:23,180 --> 00:08:24,647
- Oh, big-time.
- Okay.
271
00:08:24,681 --> 00:08:26,015
One night,
he came over and, um,
272
00:08:26,049 --> 00:08:27,650
right here
on this kitchen island.
273
00:08:27,684 --> 00:08:28,651
- I'm just saying.
- Okay, all right.
274
00:08:28,685 --> 00:08:29,652
Yeah, I'm gonna...
275
00:08:29,686 --> 00:08:31,253
Go check out
the dessert "staish."
276
00:08:31,288 --> 00:08:32,488
- Okay.
- See you, Josh.
277
00:08:32,522 --> 00:08:33,756
Yep. Don't you find
that interesting?
278
00:08:33,790 --> 00:08:34,757
It's not interesting.
279
00:08:34,791 --> 00:08:37,026
Josh is so cool, Mindy.
280
00:08:37,060 --> 00:08:38,527
He offered to take me
Nascar riding.
281
00:08:38,562 --> 00:08:40,162
Mm-hmm.
I know how to pick 'em.
282
00:08:40,197 --> 00:08:46,168
[Singing off-key in Spanish]
283
00:08:46,203 --> 00:08:50,439
284
00:08:50,474 --> 00:08:51,841
[Applause]
285
00:08:51,875 --> 00:08:54,276
(Woman)Hi, Josh.How's San Antonio?
286
00:08:54,311 --> 00:08:57,379
I'm just lying herein bed without you.
287
00:08:57,414 --> 00:08:59,515
Okay, I'll see you in a bit.
Sorry I'm late.
288
00:08:59,549 --> 00:09:00,616
Hi, Josh.
289
00:09:00,650 --> 00:09:01,951
- How's San Antonio?
- Oh, God.
290
00:09:01,985 --> 00:09:04,386
- I'm just lying here...
- Hey!
291
00:09:04,421 --> 00:09:05,387
In bed without you.
292
00:09:05,422 --> 00:09:06,388
What the hell
are you doing?
293
00:09:06,423 --> 00:09:07,389
- Get away from me.
- Hey, no.
294
00:09:07,424 --> 00:09:08,491
Just get
out of here, Danny.
295
00:09:08,525 --> 00:09:09,525
It's not any
of your business, all right?
296
00:09:09,559 --> 00:09:10,960
This is my phone.
Just give me the--
297
00:09:10,994 --> 00:09:12,928
it's not yours!
Give me the phone.
298
00:09:12,963 --> 00:09:14,563
Okay. Okay?
You can't just keep doing this.
299
00:09:14,598 --> 00:09:15,664
All right.
Fine, fine.
300
00:09:15,699 --> 00:09:17,099
Oh, my God, you dialed her.
You dialed her!
301
00:09:17,134 --> 00:09:18,134
Uh... No, talk to her.
Talk to her.
302
00:09:18,168 --> 00:09:19,268
- You talk to her.
- No, you talk to her!
303
00:09:19,302 --> 00:09:20,269
- Hello?
- Hello?
304
00:09:20,303 --> 00:09:21,437
- Hello?
- Hello?
305
00:09:21,471 --> 00:09:23,172
Why are you sleeping
with my boyfriend?
306
00:09:23,206 --> 00:09:24,673
- What?
- Find out.
307
00:09:24,708 --> 00:09:26,041
- Uh, hi, sorry.
- Find out.
308
00:09:26,076 --> 00:09:28,944
Some crazy woman just
entered my flower shop.
309
00:09:28,979 --> 00:09:30,279
- I'm not crazy.
- And she thinks
310
00:09:30,313 --> 00:09:31,680
I'm sleeping
with her boyfriend.
311
00:09:31,715 --> 00:09:32,681
- What?
- Oh.
312
00:09:32,716 --> 00:09:33,782
Well, are you?
313
00:09:33,817 --> 00:09:35,584
Uh...Yes.
314
00:09:35,619 --> 00:09:37,186
And that's
a bad thing, right?
315
00:09:37,220 --> 00:09:39,455
- What are you saying?
- Well, obviously.
316
00:09:39,489 --> 00:09:41,924
Hey, why are you callingfrom Josh Daniels' phone?
317
00:09:41,958 --> 00:09:44,093
Because he's a stupid son
of a bitch, that's why!
318
00:09:44,127 --> 00:09:45,594
Wait, who is?
319
00:09:45,629 --> 00:09:46,929
Um, I am a son of a bitch.
320
00:09:46,963 --> 00:09:49,865
Look, this guy Josh
entered into my barbershop.
321
00:09:49,900 --> 00:09:51,333
- Flower shop.
- Flower shop.
322
00:09:51,368 --> 00:09:53,202
And--and then
I stole his phone.
323
00:09:53,236 --> 00:09:55,104
Um, can--let me
ask you a question.
324
00:09:55,138 --> 00:09:57,139
- How do you know Josh?
- Yes.
325
00:09:57,174 --> 00:09:59,074
Well, I'm not goingto tell the gay philanderer
326
00:09:59,109 --> 00:10:00,643
- who robbed him.
- Okay!
327
00:10:00,677 --> 00:10:01,944
Hi,
do you want to tell me
328
00:10:01,978 --> 00:10:03,445
a little bit
about how you know Josh?
329
00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:04,947
Just because I would--
330
00:10:04,981 --> 00:10:07,116
I'd love to get
his phone back to him.
331
00:10:07,150 --> 00:10:09,451
Sure.Josh is my boyfriend.
332
00:10:09,486 --> 00:10:11,887
Ah...I'm sorry.
333
00:10:11,922 --> 00:10:14,390
Josh is not your boyfriend.
Josh is my boyfriend.
334
00:10:14,424 --> 00:10:16,625
What?Okay, who the hell are you?
335
00:10:16,660 --> 00:10:18,894
I'm Mindy Lahiri, M.D.,
you stupid bitch!
336
00:10:18,929 --> 00:10:20,296
Okay, sorry. Sorry about that.
We'll call you back.
337
00:10:20,330 --> 00:10:21,497
I'd like to find out
a little bit more information.
338
00:10:21,531 --> 00:10:22,498
Take a--
Mindy, calm down.
339
00:10:22,532 --> 00:10:23,499
Okay? Look at me.
340
00:10:23,533 --> 00:10:25,334
Take a deep breath,
go back inside,
341
00:10:25,368 --> 00:10:28,504
and you'll deal with this
another day, okay?
342
00:10:28,538 --> 00:10:30,005
Everything's gonna be fine.
I promise.
343
00:10:30,040 --> 00:10:31,340
- That's good advice.
- Are we cool?
344
00:10:31,374 --> 00:10:32,808
- We're cool.
- Give me a hug.
345
00:10:32,842 --> 00:10:34,577
- Okay.
- It's all good.
346
00:10:34,611 --> 00:10:36,345
- Not tonight.
- Yeah, okay. Yeah.
347
00:10:36,379 --> 00:10:37,913
Hey, Mindy.
Mindy. Mindy.
348
00:10:37,948 --> 00:10:39,415
Mindy!
349
00:10:39,449 --> 00:10:42,851
Don't go up there.
350
00:10:42,886 --> 00:10:45,154
[Sighs]
[Door closes]
351
00:10:47,167 --> 00:10:48,334
A little bit,
there's three different things--
352
00:10:48,368 --> 00:10:49,402
- Hey, babe.
- Hey.
353
00:10:49,436 --> 00:10:50,470
I can't reach something
in the closet.
354
00:10:50,504 --> 00:10:52,505
- Will you help me?
- Sure.
355
00:10:55,175 --> 00:10:56,776
Is this real,
or is this, like, code
356
00:10:56,810 --> 00:10:58,177
for some mid-party
delight?
357
00:10:58,212 --> 00:11:00,246
What do you think?
358
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:01,848
'Cause I have been drinking.
359
00:11:01,882 --> 00:11:03,583
So it might take me
a little longer
360
00:11:03,617 --> 00:11:05,751
to get the old lawnmower
started, but...
361
00:11:05,786 --> 00:11:06,953
It will function.
362
00:11:06,987 --> 00:11:08,020
Hey, Josh...
363
00:11:08,055 --> 00:11:09,622
How's San Antonio?
364
00:11:09,656 --> 00:11:12,191
I'm just lying here
in bed without you.
365
00:11:12,226 --> 00:11:14,260
I can't wait for you
to come back home.
366
00:11:14,294 --> 00:11:15,795
Love you.
[Smooches]
367
00:11:15,829 --> 00:11:17,430
Oh, God.
368
00:11:17,464 --> 00:11:18,598
Who is she, Josh?
369
00:11:18,632 --> 00:11:19,699
How did you find out?
370
00:11:19,733 --> 00:11:21,200
You left your stupid phone
in my phone charger,
371
00:11:21,235 --> 00:11:23,202
- and I thought it was mine.
- This is not what it looks like.
372
00:11:23,237 --> 00:11:24,237
I promise.
373
00:11:24,271 --> 00:11:25,238
Why do you have
a bowling ball?
374
00:11:25,272 --> 00:11:26,239
Couple years ago,
375
00:11:26,273 --> 00:11:27,607
I joined a league
of all-female OBs.
376
00:11:27,641 --> 00:11:29,275
The name of our team
was storks and strikes,
377
00:11:29,309 --> 00:11:30,343
like "Stars and Stripes."
378
00:11:30,377 --> 00:11:31,811
It was clever.
Josh, who is she?
379
00:11:31,845 --> 00:11:33,045
She's an ex!
380
00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:34,113
She's almost an ex.
381
00:11:34,148 --> 00:11:35,248
We started dating,
like, a year ago,
382
00:11:35,282 --> 00:11:36,282
and I tried to break up
with her.
383
00:11:36,316 --> 00:11:37,550
I did,
a couple times.
384
00:11:37,584 --> 00:11:39,018
But then her dog started
having these kidney issues,
385
00:11:39,052 --> 00:11:40,753
and when a dog
has kidney issues--
386
00:11:40,787 --> 00:11:43,389
- I'm sorry, a year ago?
- Yeah, a year, year and a half, tops.
387
00:11:43,423 --> 00:11:45,791
We haven't been dating
that long.
388
00:11:45,826 --> 00:11:48,895
Are you telling me that
she's not the other woman,
389
00:11:48,929 --> 00:11:50,630
I am the other woman?
390
00:11:50,664 --> 00:11:52,465
No, I wouldn't put it
that way.
391
00:11:52,499 --> 00:11:53,599
This is horrible.
392
00:11:53,634 --> 00:11:55,568
You are horrible.
393
00:11:55,602 --> 00:11:58,171
Please fake a work emergency
and get out.
394
00:12:02,676 --> 00:12:04,343
Oh, here,
and you have a message
395
00:12:04,378 --> 00:12:05,778
from your
credit card company.
396
00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:06,913
Early fraud warning.
397
00:12:06,947 --> 00:12:09,615
I'm only now realizing
the irony of that.
398
00:12:09,650 --> 00:12:11,184
[Indistinct chatter]
399
00:12:11,218 --> 00:12:12,618
Everyone say
good-bye to Josh.
400
00:12:12,653 --> 00:12:14,120
He has to go
immediately, so...
401
00:12:14,154 --> 00:12:15,721
Ohh.
Yeah.
402
00:12:15,756 --> 00:12:18,357
Yeah.
Big sports emergency.
403
00:12:18,392 --> 00:12:20,092
Kobe Bryant
has been shot.
404
00:12:20,127 --> 00:12:21,694
(All) What?
- No, it's fine.
405
00:12:21,728 --> 00:12:24,297
- Kobe Bryant is a famous
basketball player. - Yeah.
406
00:12:24,331 --> 00:12:25,965
- He'll probably neverplay basketball again. - No.
407
00:12:25,999 --> 00:12:26,999
- Oh, no, wait a second.
- Yeah.
408
00:12:27,034 --> 00:12:28,301
It--it's fine.
409
00:12:28,335 --> 00:12:30,136
Is he going to live
through the night?
410
00:12:30,170 --> 00:12:31,170
It's touch and go.
Gonna be fine.
411
00:12:31,205 --> 00:12:33,506
Then you are gonna
stay here...
412
00:12:33,540 --> 00:12:34,640
Appreciate it.
I appreciate it actually.
413
00:12:34,675 --> 00:12:35,908
He wishes he could,
but he has to help kobe.
414
00:12:35,943 --> 00:12:37,610
Gotta go.
Mindy's Christmas speech!
415
00:12:37,644 --> 00:12:38,711
[Applause]
Morgan...
416
00:12:38,745 --> 00:12:40,513
The Bryant family
needs Josh right now.
417
00:12:40,547 --> 00:12:41,614
(Morgan)Phil Jacksoncan help the Bryants.
418
00:12:41,648 --> 00:12:43,316
I want you to personally
guarantee me
419
00:12:43,350 --> 00:12:44,650
you will stay
for this speech.
420
00:12:44,685 --> 00:12:46,852
You're gonna love it.Say yes, Josh.
421
00:12:46,887 --> 00:12:47,853
(All)
Come on.
422
00:12:47,888 --> 00:12:48,854
Come on, Josh.
423
00:12:48,889 --> 00:12:49,855
Yeah.
424
00:12:49,890 --> 00:12:50,856
Oh, boy, he's in!
425
00:12:50,891 --> 00:12:52,258
[Applause]
426
00:12:52,292 --> 00:12:53,793
Ahem!
427
00:12:53,827 --> 00:12:56,829
Joan of Arc,
Eleanor Roosevelt,
428
00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:58,831
Margaret Meade...
429
00:12:58,865 --> 00:13:01,601
Are all literally scum
430
00:13:01,635 --> 00:13:04,370
compared to the woman that's
about to take this microphone.
431
00:13:04,404 --> 00:13:07,506
I call her the thunder
from down under.
432
00:13:07,541 --> 00:13:10,009
Give it up
for Dr. Mindy Lahiri!
433
00:13:10,043 --> 00:13:13,679
[Cheers and applause]
434
00:13:13,714 --> 00:13:15,381
No, no, get up
on the stage--
435
00:13:15,415 --> 00:13:16,983
the stairs right here.
Everyone can see you.
436
00:13:17,017 --> 00:13:18,985
- I think someone's a little shy.
- I'm not shy.
437
00:13:19,019 --> 00:13:20,186
You're a little shy.
438
00:13:20,220 --> 00:13:21,487
Let's give her
another round of applause.
439
00:13:21,521 --> 00:13:23,189
[Applause] Please
stand on the stairs.
440
00:13:23,223 --> 00:13:25,324
There you go.
Gotta get a good seat.
441
00:13:25,359 --> 00:13:26,592
Is this high enough?
442
00:13:26,627 --> 00:13:28,227
I think
that's great.
443
00:13:30,597 --> 00:13:32,932
Um, "Thank you all
for attending..."
444
00:13:32,966 --> 00:13:34,100
Please speak up.
Share your voice.
445
00:13:34,134 --> 00:13:36,736
"Josh and my Christmas party.
446
00:13:36,770 --> 00:13:39,071
"Josh came into my life
this year
447
00:13:39,106 --> 00:13:40,940
"as...
448
00:13:40,974 --> 00:13:43,776
"kind of
my own Christmas miracle
449
00:13:43,810 --> 00:13:46,045
"because...
450
00:13:46,079 --> 00:13:47,346
[Voice breaking]
"I wasn't expecting it,
451
00:13:47,381 --> 00:13:49,548
"and I didn't think
I deserved it.
452
00:13:49,583 --> 00:13:52,051
"With the warmth
that I feel in this room,
453
00:13:52,085 --> 00:13:55,288
"it is like
you are all my coziest...
454
00:13:55,322 --> 00:13:56,956
and softest blanket."
455
00:13:56,990 --> 00:13:58,257
Come on, this is
the worst Christmas speech
456
00:13:58,292 --> 00:13:59,292
I've ever heard.
Come on.
457
00:13:59,326 --> 00:14:00,426
Christmas speech.
458
00:14:00,460 --> 00:14:01,861
That's an important thing,
right?
459
00:14:01,895 --> 00:14:02,928
- Yes!- Yeah!
460
00:14:02,963 --> 00:14:04,430
Big deal.
Title of this speech
461
00:14:04,464 --> 00:14:06,899
is "I love you guys so much,
I can't even deal."
462
00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:08,267
- Ohh.
- Oh, boy.
463
00:14:08,302 --> 00:14:10,002
Okay, "Thank you all
for attending"
464
00:14:10,037 --> 00:14:11,570
Josh
and my Christmas party."
465
00:14:11,605 --> 00:14:13,906
Okay, let's--
let's just keep this...
466
00:14:13,940 --> 00:14:17,276
Uh, "and in that spirit,
we could all gather close"
467
00:14:17,311 --> 00:14:18,411
and join Han--"
I'm not gonna--
468
00:14:18,445 --> 00:14:19,679
I'm not saying that.
469
00:14:19,713 --> 00:14:21,047
Join hands? Okay.
No, don't join hands.
470
00:14:21,081 --> 00:14:22,648
Yeah, let go.
Uh, skipping down.
471
00:14:22,683 --> 00:14:24,216
How many pages
you got here?
472
00:14:24,251 --> 00:14:26,485
[Chuckles tearfully]
Um, like, eight or nine pages.
473
00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:28,220
Eight or nine.
474
00:14:28,255 --> 00:14:29,789
Yeah, that's a lot
for a, uh, party.
475
00:14:29,823 --> 00:14:32,224
- I had a lot to say.
- Yeah. Well, that's good.
476
00:14:32,259 --> 00:14:33,225
I love that.
That's great.
477
00:14:33,260 --> 00:14:34,627
Okay.
I'm gonna just, uh...
478
00:14:34,661 --> 00:14:36,395
Should I go
to the conclusion?
479
00:14:36,430 --> 00:14:39,665
"In, uh, in conclusion,
480
00:14:39,700 --> 00:14:42,568
"to paraphrase
another great woman of color,
481
00:14:42,602 --> 00:14:44,270
"Mariah Carey,
482
00:14:44,304 --> 00:14:45,771
"'all I want for Christmas...'
483
00:14:45,806 --> 00:14:48,240
"gesture to the crowd...
484
00:14:48,275 --> 00:14:50,276
'is all of you.'"
485
00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:52,478
okay? Ohh. I love you.
486
00:14:52,512 --> 00:14:53,479
[Applause]
487
00:14:53,513 --> 00:14:55,014
Thanks.
You all right?
488
00:14:55,048 --> 00:14:57,083
- Who's Mindy?
- Heather?
489
00:14:57,117 --> 00:14:58,084
Yeah!
490
00:14:58,118 --> 00:15:00,453
I'm here to meet
your mistress, Josh.
491
00:15:03,100 --> 00:15:04,816
How did you know
I was here?
492
00:15:04,851 --> 00:15:05,884
I used
the phone tracker app.
493
00:15:05,918 --> 00:15:07,219
We have the same password,
remember?
494
00:15:07,253 --> 00:15:08,553
You share a password?
495
00:15:08,588 --> 00:15:10,021
Damn right we do.
496
00:15:10,056 --> 00:15:11,156
It's our dead dog's name.
497
00:15:11,190 --> 00:15:13,458
You co-owned a dog,
Josh?
498
00:15:13,493 --> 00:15:15,126
- Come on. Now, wait.
- The kidney dog?
499
00:15:15,161 --> 00:15:16,661
She knows
about Princess Buttercup?
500
00:15:16,696 --> 00:15:18,997
Princess Buttercup is the name
of your dog, Josh?
501
00:15:19,031 --> 00:15:20,131
- Come on--
- Great!
502
00:15:20,166 --> 00:15:21,800
Now I have to change
my password!
503
00:15:21,834 --> 00:15:22,934
Oh, my God.
Oh, my G--
504
00:15:22,969 --> 00:15:24,569
- Oh, my God.
- Do you have a key necklace?
505
00:15:24,604 --> 00:15:27,772
Okay, she has
a key necklace, everyone,
506
00:15:27,807 --> 00:15:30,475
except hers is encrusted
in diamonds,
507
00:15:30,510 --> 00:15:31,776
and mine
just features diamonds.
508
00:15:31,811 --> 00:15:33,578
Danny, did you see that?
509
00:15:33,613 --> 00:15:34,913
Okay, so this
is where you've been
510
00:15:34,947 --> 00:15:36,681
on all those last-minute trips
to Sacramento...
511
00:15:36,716 --> 00:15:38,416
Shacking up in the village
512
00:15:38,451 --> 00:15:40,952
with some
chubby Indian girl!
513
00:15:40,987 --> 00:15:42,020
(All) Whoa! Excuse me?
514
00:15:42,054 --> 00:15:43,388
(Danny)That's not cool.
515
00:15:43,422 --> 00:15:44,923
- I will kill you.
- No, you're not gonna kill her.
516
00:15:44,957 --> 00:15:46,258
- I will kill you in my house.
- That's not called for.
517
00:15:46,292 --> 00:15:47,526
- Okay, lady?
- I will go to prison for life.
518
00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:48,860
You sound familiar.
519
00:15:48,895 --> 00:15:51,429
You--you are
that philandering gay florist!
520
00:15:51,464 --> 00:15:52,764
Yeah!
So what if he is, all right?
521
00:15:52,798 --> 00:15:54,533
At least he's not
some psychotic monster bitch
522
00:15:54,567 --> 00:15:56,635
who crashes a partyand calls a hostess chubby
523
00:15:56,669 --> 00:15:58,003
when she's not!
524
00:15:58,037 --> 00:16:00,171
She's just normal
American woman size.
525
00:16:00,206 --> 00:16:01,973
- And healthy. - All right, this
is a culture of anorexia,
526
00:16:02,008 --> 00:16:04,776
- starting right here.
- Oh, I'm so sorry I flew off the handle
527
00:16:04,810 --> 00:16:08,079
when I found out
that my boyfriend of two years
528
00:16:08,114 --> 00:16:09,080
is cheating on me!
529
00:16:09,115 --> 00:16:10,649
What? Two years?
530
00:16:10,683 --> 00:16:11,650
Way to go, Josh.
531
00:16:11,684 --> 00:16:12,984
Wait.
Now, it's two years
532
00:16:13,019 --> 00:16:14,286
since we met.
533
00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:15,787
You ruined my life.
534
00:16:15,821 --> 00:16:16,888
Well, you ruined
my party, okay?
535
00:16:16,923 --> 00:16:17,923
This is my home.
536
00:16:17,957 --> 00:16:19,157
Oh!
What about my home?
537
00:16:19,191 --> 00:16:20,592
You're a home wrecker!
538
00:16:20,626 --> 00:16:21,826
[All shouting]
539
00:16:21,861 --> 00:16:22,894
What are you doing?
540
00:16:22,929 --> 00:16:24,796
Hey!
541
00:16:24,830 --> 00:16:25,864
Whoa! Whoa!
542
00:16:25,898 --> 00:16:26,865
What is wrong with you?
543
00:16:26,899 --> 00:16:28,633
Nothing.
I'm just fine.
544
00:16:28,668 --> 00:16:29,868
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Just gonna wash up!
545
00:16:29,902 --> 00:16:31,636
That's fine,
put more water on the floor
546
00:16:31,671 --> 00:16:33,138
'cause it was dirty anyway.
Josh, come here.
547
00:16:33,172 --> 00:16:35,173
I was just feeling
kind of horny.
548
00:16:35,207 --> 00:16:36,441
Ew!Oh, that's not gonna help.
549
00:16:36,475 --> 00:16:37,943
Oh, you know what?
We do that too,
550
00:16:37,977 --> 00:16:39,210
except we--
we do it naked.
551
00:16:39,245 --> 00:16:40,545
This is a family affair.
552
00:16:40,580 --> 00:16:42,380
You cannot talk like that.
553
00:16:42,415 --> 00:16:45,216
[Overlapping shouting]
Don't--don't throw--
554
00:16:46,686 --> 00:16:47,652
That was amazing.
555
00:16:47,687 --> 00:16:49,020
Oh, look.
556
00:16:49,055 --> 00:16:50,655
Another home I can wreck.
557
00:16:50,690 --> 00:16:51,656
(All)
No, no...
558
00:16:51,691 --> 00:16:52,791
Not the house!
559
00:16:52,825 --> 00:16:54,726
Please--no, no, no!
560
00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:56,828
[All groan]
561
00:16:56,862 --> 00:16:59,230
- Not the house!
(All) No!
562
00:16:59,265 --> 00:17:00,465
Hey, you know what?
I was wrong.
563
00:17:00,499 --> 00:17:01,566
Hey, hey.
564
00:17:01,601 --> 00:17:02,701
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
565
00:17:02,735 --> 00:17:04,603
Just get down there.
Get down!
566
00:17:04,637 --> 00:17:05,604
I said
I was sorry!
567
00:17:05,638 --> 00:17:06,805
- Eat a pretzel!
- Aah!
568
00:17:06,839 --> 00:17:08,373
The bummer is,
under different circumstances,
569
00:17:08,407 --> 00:17:09,608
you two
would've totally hit it off.
570
00:17:09,642 --> 00:17:11,409
My eyes! I can't see! I'm sorry!
571
00:17:11,444 --> 00:17:12,811
Take her down, Stass!
572
00:17:12,845 --> 00:17:14,346
[Overlapping shouting]
573
00:17:14,380 --> 00:17:16,314
That's enough. That's enough!
That's enough!
574
00:17:16,349 --> 00:17:18,516
- I can handle this, Morgan.
- Yeah.
575
00:17:18,551 --> 00:17:20,051
You know
what trespassing is, right?
576
00:17:20,086 --> 00:17:22,420
Yeah, I've been charged
with it, like, five times.
577
00:17:22,455 --> 00:17:23,521
Not you.
578
00:17:23,556 --> 00:17:25,156
I just think
579
00:17:25,191 --> 00:17:27,325
that everyone at this party
needs to know
580
00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:29,761
this woman sleeps
with other people's boyfriends.
581
00:17:29,795 --> 00:17:31,196
- Okay, no, that was you.
- Not true.
582
00:17:31,230 --> 00:17:34,366
Actually, uh...
583
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:38,036
Technically, she is right.
584
00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:39,270
I thought
she was the mistress,
585
00:17:39,305 --> 00:17:41,706
but in fact,
I am the mistress.
586
00:17:41,741 --> 00:17:43,408
You honestly
didn't know about me?
587
00:17:43,442 --> 00:17:46,044
I swear I didn't know.
588
00:17:46,078 --> 00:17:47,379
I guess it was
too much to ask
589
00:17:47,413 --> 00:17:49,914
that I have a great,
monogamous boyfriend
590
00:17:49,949 --> 00:17:52,951
and that I throw
a great Christmas party,
591
00:17:52,985 --> 00:17:54,786
but them's the breaks.
592
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:56,655
I'm feeling
a little tuckered out,
593
00:17:56,689 --> 00:17:58,757
so I'm gonna just, uh,
call it a night.
594
00:17:58,791 --> 00:18:01,793
Make sure that you take
a gift bag on your way out.
595
00:18:01,827 --> 00:18:02,861
Do me a favor, though.
596
00:18:02,895 --> 00:18:05,764
Just cut Josh's face
out of the--the bag.
597
00:18:05,798 --> 00:18:06,998
It's no longer applicable.
598
00:18:07,033 --> 00:18:09,034
I'm gonna go drink
some, uh, cough syrup,
599
00:18:09,068 --> 00:18:10,872
and I'll see you
in the new year's.
600
00:18:13,906 --> 00:18:16,374
Right here.
Right--right here.
601
00:18:16,409 --> 00:18:18,309
[Gasps] You need to cool out
for a little bit, mama.
602
00:18:18,344 --> 00:18:19,678
You're too hot.
603
00:18:19,712 --> 00:18:20,712
I'll handle--
I'll watch her.
604
00:18:20,746 --> 00:18:22,213
- You take five.
- Okay.
605
00:18:22,248 --> 00:18:23,448
Gee, you're strong.
606
00:18:23,482 --> 00:18:24,983
[Last Christmas plays]
607
00:18:25,017 --> 00:18:26,384
[Door closes]
608
00:18:26,419 --> 00:18:30,422
609
00:18:30,456 --> 00:18:31,423
[Crying]
What?
610
00:18:31,457 --> 00:18:32,891
Can't a guy sit?
611
00:18:32,925 --> 00:18:34,259
Please go.
612
00:18:34,293 --> 00:18:36,761
I thought my presence
would be comforting.
613
00:18:36,796 --> 00:18:39,330
- Not really.
- No?
614
00:18:39,365 --> 00:18:41,499
You have this rattle
when you breathe.
615
00:18:41,534 --> 00:18:43,101
Sorry.
616
00:18:43,135 --> 00:18:46,304
I-I just didn't want you
to be by yourself.
617
00:18:46,338 --> 00:18:47,706
We should leave.
618
00:18:47,740 --> 00:18:49,741
I'm sure Dr. Lahiri
wants to be alone.
619
00:18:49,775 --> 00:18:50,975
Everybody, stop.
620
00:18:51,010 --> 00:18:52,410
You can't leave.
Betsy!
621
00:18:52,945 --> 00:18:54,546
When your turtle
got salmonella,
622
00:18:54,580 --> 00:18:56,414
who pumped his stomach out
with a little straw?
623
00:18:56,449 --> 00:18:57,649
Dr. Lahiri.
624
00:18:57,683 --> 00:18:59,417
Shauna, when you wanted
to wear
625
00:18:59,452 --> 00:19:00,952
short, tight-fitted skirts
to work,
626
00:19:00,986 --> 00:19:02,454
who told you to be yourself
and go for it?
627
00:19:02,488 --> 00:19:04,089
- Dr. Lahiri.
- Wait. What?
628
00:19:04,123 --> 00:19:05,523
Morgan...
629
00:19:05,558 --> 00:19:07,392
Where would you be
without Mindy?
630
00:19:07,426 --> 00:19:08,860
I'd be working
at that fake Popeyes
631
00:19:08,894 --> 00:19:09,928
on Queens Boulevard.
632
00:19:09,962 --> 00:19:12,263
Exactly.
633
00:19:12,298 --> 00:19:14,132
Mindy has always been there
for us,
634
00:19:14,166 --> 00:19:15,433
now we're going
to be there for her.
635
00:19:15,468 --> 00:19:16,735
Betsy, gloves.
636
00:19:16,769 --> 00:19:18,002
Shauna, apron.
637
00:19:18,037 --> 00:19:20,171
Morgan, spatula,
stat.
638
00:19:20,206 --> 00:19:22,273
You're gonna be okay, little guy.
Thanks, doc.
639
00:19:22,308 --> 00:19:24,676
- I'm talking to the house, Morgan.
- Yeah.
640
00:19:24,710 --> 00:19:26,611
I thought I'd made progress,
but I was wrong.
641
00:19:26,645 --> 00:19:28,313
No one will ever love me.
642
00:19:28,847 --> 00:19:31,683
I'm such a loser.
I'm back to zero.
643
00:19:31,717 --> 00:19:33,551
No, no.
Come on.
644
00:19:33,586 --> 00:19:35,186
Stop crying.
645
00:19:35,221 --> 00:19:37,889
- Buck up.
- Danny! Danny! Stop hitting me!
646
00:19:37,923 --> 00:19:39,691
When you're sad,
you're supposed to cry.
647
00:19:39,725 --> 00:19:41,760
Look, you're never gonna get
to a place
648
00:19:41,794 --> 00:19:43,561
where bad things
don't happen to you.
649
00:19:43,596 --> 00:19:45,230
You handled this
pretty well tonight...
650
00:19:45,264 --> 00:19:47,065
Well, not that well,
651
00:19:47,099 --> 00:19:48,666
but a lot better than you
would've when I first met you.
652
00:19:48,701 --> 00:19:50,568
That's progress
right there.
653
00:19:50,603 --> 00:19:52,303
And I know
you're gonna meet some guy,
654
00:19:52,338 --> 00:19:55,473
and--and whoever
that guy is...
655
00:19:55,508 --> 00:19:57,509
He's not getting
a terrible deal out of it.
656
00:19:57,543 --> 00:19:59,444
Danny...
657
00:19:59,478 --> 00:20:01,513
If we're still single
in five years
658
00:20:01,547 --> 00:20:03,982
and we haven't
found anybody,
659
00:20:04,016 --> 00:20:05,585
can we make a pact...
660
00:20:07,419 --> 00:20:09,521
That we will kill
each other?
661
00:20:09,555 --> 00:20:12,724
Yeah.
Absolutely.
662
00:20:12,758 --> 00:20:15,794
But the very next day
663
00:20:15,828 --> 00:20:16,795
you gave it away
664
00:20:16,829 --> 00:20:18,596
you gave it
away
665
00:20:18,631 --> 00:20:21,232
Hey, Mindy!
666
00:20:21,267 --> 00:20:22,600
Oh, grab a drink.
667
00:20:23,635 --> 00:20:24,536
Thank you.
668
00:20:24,570 --> 00:20:25,937
I can't believe
you guys stayed.
669
00:20:25,971 --> 00:20:28,973
Get this arm out.
There you go--ohh!
670
00:20:29,008 --> 00:20:30,775
I'm handcuffed,
so it's not gonna come off.
671
00:20:30,810 --> 00:20:32,243
Yeah, just...
672
00:20:33,278 --> 00:20:35,079
I don't know if the frosting
is load-bearing.
673
00:20:35,114 --> 00:20:36,382
What?
674
00:20:37,616 --> 00:20:40,084
You know what, man?
Thank you.
675
00:20:40,119 --> 00:20:41,152
I appreciate it.
676
00:20:41,887 --> 00:20:43,087
It looks really beautiful.
677
00:20:43,122 --> 00:20:45,123
Danny, does it remind you
of your broken home?
678
00:20:45,157 --> 00:20:48,393
Listen, is anybody else sick
of this Christmas music?
679
00:20:48,427 --> 00:20:50,428
Can we just do some--
just karaoke?
680
00:20:50,962 --> 00:20:52,831
Oh, doc, that only
plays music in espa?ol.
681
00:20:52,865 --> 00:20:53,832
[Ritchie Valens'
La Bamba plays]
682
00:20:53,866 --> 00:20:54,899
Oh, perfect.
683
00:20:54,934 --> 00:20:56,401
Or should I say, perfecto?
Whoa.
684
00:20:56,435 --> 00:20:58,169
Para bailar la bamba
685
00:20:58,204 --> 00:20:59,237
Let's go.
686
00:20:59,271 --> 00:21:00,939
Para bailar la bamba
687
00:21:00,973 --> 00:21:03,308
se necesitaun poquito de gracia
688
00:21:03,342 --> 00:21:04,642
Everybody dance.
689
00:21:04,677 --> 00:21:07,512
Un poquito de graciay otra cosita
690
00:21:07,546 --> 00:21:09,948
y arriba y arriba
691
00:21:09,982 --> 00:21:11,482
y arriba
y arriba
692
00:21:11,517 --> 00:21:15,086
por ti sere, por ti sere,por ti sere
693
00:21:15,120 --> 00:21:16,087
Come on, everybody!
694
00:21:16,121 --> 00:21:17,856
Bamba, bamba
695
00:21:17,890 --> 00:21:18,957
Everybody!
696
00:21:18,991 --> 00:21:20,558
Bamba, bamba
697
00:21:20,593 --> 00:21:21,593
That's right.
698
00:21:21,627 --> 00:21:25,864
Bamba, bamba
699
00:21:25,898 --> 00:21:27,866
(Man)
Go to bed.
700
00:21:28,192 --> 00:21:33,293
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
701
00:21:33,343 --> 00:21:37,893
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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