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♪ MAN 1: Fellas, I'm ready ♪
♪ to get up and do my thing ♪
2
00:00:03,871 --> 00:00:05,179
(MEN EXCLAIMING IN AGREEMENT)
3
00:00:05,272 --> 00:00:07,145
♪ I wanna get into it man, ♪
♪ you know ♪
4
00:00:07,508 --> 00:00:09,281
♪ Like a sex machine, man ♪
5
00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:11,380
♪ Moving, doing it, you know ♪
6
00:00:11,645 --> 00:00:12,646
♪ Can I count it off? ♪
7
00:00:12,713 --> 00:00:14,522
♪ One, two, three, four ♪
8
00:00:14,615 --> 00:00:16,026
(FUNK MUSIC PLAYING)
9
00:00:16,116 --> 00:00:18,027
- ♪ Get up ♪
- ♪ MAN 2: Get on up ♪
10
00:00:18,619 --> 00:00:20,189
♪ Get up ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
11
00:00:20,287 --> 00:00:22,392
♪ Stay on the scene ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
12
00:00:22,489 --> 00:00:24,662
♪ Like a sex machine ♪
♪ I Get on up ♪
13
00:00:25,058 --> 00:00:26,901
♪ Get up ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
14
00:00:27,394 --> 00:00:29,135
♪ Get up ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
15
00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:31,204
♪ Be on the scene ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
16
00:00:31,298 --> 00:00:33,505
♪ Like a sex machine ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
17
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,813
♪ Get up ♪
♪ Get on up ♪
18
00:00:36,136 --> 00:00:37,843
♪ Get up ♪
♪ Get on up I ♪
19
00:00:37,905 --> 00:00:38,905
MAN: So, tell me.
20
00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:40,315
Tell you what?
21
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:41,717
About last night.
22
00:00:41,808 --> 00:00:44,867
So, I go to that new spot
on, uh, Sixth and Main, right?
23
00:00:44,893 --> 00:00:45,554
Right.
24
00:00:45,580 --> 00:00:47,706
Nice atmosphere,
beautiful women, Danny.
25
00:00:47,761 --> 00:00:48,189
Shit.
26
00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:50,058
Why are you saying “shit"?
I asked you to come.
27
00:00:50,150 --> 00:00:52,391
I see this chick,
cute girl, tight.
28
00:00:52,486 --> 00:00:53,521
Model tight?
29
00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:54,724
No. No, no, no, no.
30
00:00:54,821 --> 00:00:56,982
I'm not fucking with them
anorexic girls no more, dude.
31
00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:58,901
It's like fucking a 10-speed
bike with daddy issues.
32
00:00:58,992 --> 00:00:59,688
True.
33
00:00:59,790 --> 00:01:02,265
This girl,
she's put together, man,
34
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:04,501
I mean, nice tities,
nice ass, whole package.
35
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:06,511
But,
I think I kind of know her.
36
00:01:06,617 --> 00:01:09,400
Hey, my name is Bernie.
37
00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:11,121
Good for you.
38
00:01:11,371 --> 00:01:12,542
You know Angela.
39
00:01:13,668 --> 00:01:14,748
Yeah, I know Ang, too.
40
00:01:14,881 --> 00:01:16,428
Right, Bernie.
41
00:01:16,460 --> 00:01:17,344
Yeah.
42
00:01:17,844 --> 00:01:20,470
Yeah, you used to date Angela.
43
00:01:20,548 --> 00:01:21,181
Date?
44
00:01:21,302 --> 00:01:24,676
No, I was fucking the shit out
of Angela, that's what that was.
45
00:01:24,820 --> 00:01:26,187
You got those
edges nappy, huh?
46
00:01:26,253 --> 00:01:27,254
(CHUCKLES)
47
00:01:27,354 --> 00:01:28,724
WOMAN: So, at this
point, I'm intrigued.
48
00:01:28,834 --> 00:01:33,265
Nothing makes a guy sexier than if
he screwed over a chick you hate.
49
00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:34,634
(CHUCKLES)
It's like revenge by association.
50
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:36,035
Exactly.
51
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:40,442
So, this Bernie's got a pair.
It's ladies' night, I'm down, we get drunk.
52
00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:42,527
- You buy?
- Of course, I buy. What am I, a dick?
53
00:01:42,536 --> 00:01:45,380
She gets drunk, I get drunk
we go back to my place, right?
54
00:01:45,539 --> 00:01:48,110
Listen to me,
Danny, this chick was insane.
55
00:01:48,208 --> 00:01:49,653
But he gets too drunk.
56
00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:51,780
See, you always let
them drink too much.
57
00:01:51,878 --> 00:01:54,119
No. It is not
my fault he got...
58
00:01:54,214 --> 00:01:56,387
Whiskey-dick?
Shame on you.
59
00:01:56,573 --> 00:01:59,294
Dude, I had to keep up with her
drinking or else I look like a pussy.
60
00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:01,879
It's not my fault my friend
downstairs couldn't keep it together.
61
00:02:01,922 --> 00:02:03,629
You got two ways to
look at whiskey-dick.
62
00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:06,227
The con is that your dick
is functionally dysfunctional.
63
00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:08,136
The pro is that
your click gets extra
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00:02:08,261 --> 00:02:10,070
special attention for
his extra special needs.
65
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,167
How much extra special attention
did she have to give you?
66
00:02:12,265 --> 00:02:15,178
It was heaven. She was down
there at least 20 minutes.
67
00:02:15,268 --> 00:02:17,407
Any longer than that
and you might as well charge.
68
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,314
So, I'm pulling
out all the stops.
69
00:02:19,439 --> 00:02:21,282
I'm talking dirty,
I do handwork...
70
00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:24,584
I put on a goddamn slow jam.
I mean, I am impressing myself.
71
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:25,646
Mmm-hmm.
72
00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:28,625
I am like an EMT crew
reviving a car crash victim.
73
00:02:28,682 --> 00:02:29,682
Ha!
74
00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:33,095
Do you know what I mean? I'm like
a hairdryer, lam blowing so hard.
75
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:37,659
But, I must admit,
it was well worth the wait.
76
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:39,203
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
77
00:02:39,292 --> 00:02:41,363
Impressive,
but not threatening.
78
00:02:41,461 --> 00:02:44,999
It's like the John
Legend of penises.
79
00:02:45,098 --> 00:02:46,098
Mmm. That is impressive.
80
00:02:46,133 --> 00:02:47,134
Very.
81
00:02:47,934 --> 00:02:50,210
So I'm down there
and it is the...
82
00:02:50,303 --> 00:02:53,477
Best head this year.
83
00:02:53,540 --> 00:02:54,814
What?
84
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:57,515
Thorough, paid attention to detail,
took pride in her work, Danny.
85
00:02:57,611 --> 00:02:59,181
Did she do your taxes as well?
86
00:02:59,279 --> 00:03:00,656
Snarky, but I'll allow it.
87
00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,193
Only reason why is because
you been crying in your beer
88
00:03:02,282 --> 00:03:04,319
since crazy Alison left
your ass over a year ago.
89
00:03:04,384 --> 00:03:05,385
I'm taking my time.
90
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:07,826
You know what your problem is?
You're too damn good-looking, man.
91
00:03:07,888 --> 00:03:08,888
What?
92
00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:10,798
See, guys like me gotta work a
lot harder than guys like you.
93
00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,701
Guys like you don't appreciate the
wealth of asses at their disposal.
94
00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:16,138
Best thing that could happen to your
face is an industrial accident.
95
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:17,698
Whatever.
I'm serious.
96
00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:19,869
Dude, you need to go meet you
a nice-looking female,
97
00:03:19,966 --> 00:03:21,877
take her back to your place,
turn her out!
98
00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:23,003
Make her feel things.
99
00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:24,515
You made Joan feel things?
100
00:03:24,571 --> 00:03:27,074
Oh, I made her feel like good
and evil hung in the balance,
101
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:30,383
like we were at peace talks and her
orgasms were the end of genocide.
102
00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:31,578
I saved the world
last night, Danny.
103
00:03:31,678 --> 00:03:33,658
We appreciate it, brother.
You're welcome.
104
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,591
Then she was like...
(MOANING)
105
00:03:35,682 --> 00:03:37,252
And I'm like...
(GROANING)
106
00:03:37,350 --> 00:03:38,829
Stop. Stop, stop.
107
00:03:39,086 --> 00:03:42,158
(SIGHS) Yeah, I'm okay.
Never mind, never mind, keep going.
108
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:43,223
(MOANING)
109
00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:45,564
Stop. Stop stop. Stop, stop.
110
00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:46,831
(MOANING)
111
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,772
Motherfucker, I said stop!
Are you deaf, Negro?
112
00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:51,464
And I'm like,
"Well, bitch, which is it?"
113
00:03:51,531 --> 00:03:53,533
I got a Charley horse.
114
00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:54,738
Ah, were your legs
up around your...
115
00:03:54,835 --> 00:03:58,282
Obviously, which is so annoying,
because I was just about to...
116
00:03:58,371 --> 00:04:00,214
Come on.
117
00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:02,219
I'm like, finish your yoga
so we can do it again.
118
00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:03,686
Right, but
the headline there is "again."
119
00:04:03,777 --> 00:04:05,188
Yes.
120
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,280
We had to start all over.
121
00:04:06,379 --> 00:04:08,757
So if it was bad sex, why are
we hanging out with this guy?
122
00:04:08,849 --> 00:04:12,126
It wasn't bad,
it was imperfect.
123
00:04:12,219 --> 00:04:13,259
Isn't that the same thing?
124
00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:15,026
Heads up,
Little Miss Overachiever.
125
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,398
When it comes to sex,
if you get it right
126
00:04:17,524 --> 00:04:19,868
the first time,
you got nowhere to go.
127
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:20,927
Come on.
128
00:04:22,129 --> 00:04:23,540
Oh, wait, there he is.
129
00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:24,931
The other one's cute.
130
00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:27,204
That must be his "this
isn't a date" friend.
131
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:28,812
Mmm. Hey!
132
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,245
Come on.
133
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:32,815
Hey... hey!
134
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:34,283
What's going on?
135
00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:36,320
All right, well...
136
00:04:36,409 --> 00:04:38,946
(CHUCKLES) What do you think?
It's a nice place, right?
137
00:04:39,045 --> 00:04:40,456
Uh, it's okay. It's a bar.
138
00:04:40,547 --> 00:04:41,753
Hey, I mean,
if it's a bar, that means
139
00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:43,122
we supposed to
be getting drunk.
140
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:45,497
As a matter of fact, this next
round is on you two ladies.
141
00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:49,294
Oh, charming. This is my
roommate, Debbie Sullivan.
142
00:04:49,389 --> 00:04:50,959
How you doing? Bernie Litko.
143
00:04:51,057 --> 00:04:53,059
Good to meet you.
Hi. Nice to meet you.
144
00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:56,570
Uh, uh, this is my guy, this is
Danny Martin. He works with me.
145
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,303
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
146
00:04:58,398 --> 00:04:59,468
(CHUCKLES)
147
00:04:59,566 --> 00:05:00,567
Hi, Danny.
148
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:02,307
Oh, shit. I'm sorry,
Joan, this is Danny.
149
00:05:02,402 --> 00:05:03,506
This is who I was
just telling you about.
150
00:05:03,603 --> 00:05:05,446
Yeah, I heard a lot about you.
151
00:05:05,505 --> 00:05:07,416
So, what do you guys do?
152
00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:08,748
Restaurant supply.
153
00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:10,413
Exactly.
Oh, wow.
154
00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:13,151
Thai sounds like you guys are
either waiters or in the Mafia.
155
00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:15,089
All right, sweetie,
I'm gonna need you to
156
00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:17,091
take these unsolicited
attacks down a notch.
157
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:20,529
Save the crazy for later,
when I got use for that shit.
158
00:05:20,620 --> 00:05:22,327
(CHUCKLES)
(LAUGHS)
159
00:05:22,422 --> 00:05:23,423
Okay.
160
00:05:23,790 --> 00:05:26,327
- Damn! Now, wait a minute.
- (SQUEALS)
161
00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:27,632
Let me help you.
162
00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:29,835
You see this shit?
163
00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:31,705
Ah. Got me one.
164
00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:32,936
Okay.
165
00:05:35,602 --> 00:05:37,445
Oh, thank you.
166
00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:42,178
Okay. I'm gonna take it.
167
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:43,720
JOAN: I want it! I want it!
168
00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:45,045
(LAUGHING)
169
00:05:45,145 --> 00:05:46,146
BERNIE: We gotta
take another shot.
170
00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:47,314
It's here!
171
00:05:47,647 --> 00:05:49,957
Hey, come on. You sure you
don't want another round?
172
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,996
I'm fine, I got my drink.
Come on, shots.
173
00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:53,827
She never goes out
unless I drag her.
174
00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:55,729
That's not true.
175
00:05:55,822 --> 00:05:58,701
It is true, baby. She only sleeps
with guys at her advertising firm.
176
00:05:58,792 --> 00:06:00,703
What?
It's so sad.
177
00:06:00,794 --> 00:06:02,068
She has to get it in at work.
178
00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:03,503
Also not true.
179
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:05,907
You're not by yourself. Let me tell
you something. He just as sad.
180
00:06:05,999 --> 00:06:08,843
Yawn-fest over here,
he ain't been out
181
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:11,143
since his ex-girlfriend Alison
broke up with him over a year ago.
182
00:06:11,238 --> 00:06:12,376
Ah, easy.
183
00:06:12,472 --> 00:06:14,383
That's because he felt emasculated.
I mean, she left him.
184
00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:16,420
That happens a lot,
don't be embarrassed.
185
00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:17,749
Baby, he should
hook up with Debbie,
186
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,158
so they could be
boring together!
187
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:20,180
BERNIE: Y'all should
hook up and do this.
188
00:06:20,313 --> 00:06:21,314
JOAN: He should
hook up with Deb.
189
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,224
Oh, yeah. I wanna do that.
190
00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:24,727
You wanna do that?
I wanna do that.
191
00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:27,025
Let me tell you something,
we will never be boring.
192
00:06:27,654 --> 00:06:33,661
♪ Me and you will ♪
♪ never be boring ♪
193
00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:35,262
(LAUGHING)
194
00:06:35,362 --> 00:06:37,774
Public place. Get a room!
195
00:06:37,864 --> 00:06:39,207
That's what I mean. Boring!
196
00:06:39,266 --> 00:06:40,336
I'm about to boo you.
197
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:41,570
It's okay, fine.
198
00:06:41,835 --> 00:06:42,836
Boo.
199
00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:46,041
JOAN: Baby I'm gonna go to
that place where you pee.
200
00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:49,009
(SQUEALS)
201
00:06:50,543 --> 00:06:52,216
(BERNIE CHUCKLES)
202
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:53,280
Ooh!
203
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:55,288
Want me to go with you?
204
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:56,689
No, I'm fine, I'm fine!
205
00:06:57,050 --> 00:06:59,860
I'm about to go to that place
where she pees, too.
206
00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:01,087
All right.
207
00:07:01,187 --> 00:07:02,257
Here I go.
208
00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:04,199
Shit, yeah, lam.
209
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:07,403
Hey, hey. I'm sorry
I said that shit about Alison.
210
00:07:07,460 --> 00:07:08,460
Just go.
211
00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:09,529
I shouldn't have said that.
212
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:11,439
Please.
I'm gonna beat this pussy up.
213
00:07:11,531 --> 00:07:12,771
Go, please!
214
00:07:15,902 --> 00:07:17,108
(SIGHING)
Wow.
215
00:07:18,038 --> 00:07:19,540
I'm not really boring.
216
00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:21,085
Yeah, me neither.
217
00:07:21,207 --> 00:07:23,813
I just pretend to be, so that
she can be the crazy one.
218
00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:28,256
This may be the worst date I've ever
been on, and it's not even my date.
219
00:07:28,315 --> 00:07:29,555
I've definitely had worse.
220
00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:31,094
Yeah?
Yeah.
221
00:07:31,151 --> 00:07:32,351
That's why I
don't go out much.
222
00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:33,489
It's not worth it, right?
223
00:07:33,586 --> 00:07:35,463
Why even try
something when 95%
224
00:07:35,588 --> 00:07:37,465
of the time if is
just an epic failure?
225
00:07:38,491 --> 00:07:42,735
Because that other 5%
can be pretty mind-blowing.
226
00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,301
Turn around!
Put your hand up here.
227
00:07:46,399 --> 00:07:48,310
I don't feel like a lady!
228
00:07:48,401 --> 00:07:50,108
Listen. Listen.
229
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:51,171
I'm a flower.
230
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:52,305
Okay, you're my flower.
231
00:07:52,405 --> 00:07:55,614
Okay, you know what you're gonna do?
You're gonna sit on me.
232
00:07:55,675 --> 00:07:57,018
That's it!
Okay.
233
00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,111
I'm going to sit on you, okay.
Okay.
234
00:07:58,178 --> 00:07:59,178
Come here.
235
00:07:59,245 --> 00:08:00,588
(TOILET FLUSHING)
Oh, my God, what is that?
236
00:08:00,747 --> 00:08:02,090
You flushed it!
237
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:04,321
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
You can turn that thing off.
238
00:08:07,287 --> 00:08:08,493
It's work.
239
00:08:08,588 --> 00:08:10,795
I should go. I have to get
up early in the morning.
240
00:08:10,857 --> 00:08:12,097
Can I walk you out?
241
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:16,638
Yeah, sure.
242
00:08:18,198 --> 00:08:19,199
DANNY: Are you serious?
243
00:08:19,866 --> 00:08:20,867
Yep.
244
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:24,347
So, you lived in L.A. six years...
Mmm-hmm.
245
00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:25,780
And you've never
been to a Dodgers game?
246
00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:27,011
Nope.
247
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:31,178
I have killer seats.
I'll take you.
248
00:08:31,811 --> 00:08:33,688
Are you asking me out?
249
00:08:33,780 --> 00:08:34,781
(CHUCKLES)
250
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:39,061
un, yeah.
(LAUGHS)
251
00:08:39,152 --> 00:08:40,893
- Yeah.
- MAN: Debbie?
252
00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:46,065
Deborah Sullivan.
253
00:08:46,159 --> 00:08:47,866
Hello, Terrell.
It's been a while.
254
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:48,961
Six months.
255
00:08:48,995 --> 00:08:51,805
You're too good
to return my calls?
256
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:53,208
Bitch move, Deb.
Hmm.
257
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:54,334
Whoa.
258
00:08:54,401 --> 00:08:56,904
It's okay. He's taken one too
many hits to the head, clearly.
259
00:08:57,003 --> 00:08:58,676
So, this you now?
This is me. Mmm-hmm.
260
00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:01,344
Suit yourself.
Life is short.
261
00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:02,578
And so is he.
262
00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:04,049
(GUYS LAUGHING)
263
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:09,191
He's corny.
Yeah.
264
00:09:09,315 --> 00:09:10,658
Remember that
95% epic failure?
265
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,058
Yeah.
266
00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:13,893
Exhibit A.
Really?
267
00:09:13,987 --> 00:09:15,557
Yep.
268
00:09:15,655 --> 00:09:17,066
I'm sorry, was that weird?
269
00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:19,330
No, I'll be your fake
boyfriend whenever you want.
270
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:20,530
(CHUCKLES)
271
00:09:20,593 --> 00:09:22,095
But I wouldn't do this.
272
00:09:22,195 --> 00:09:26,166
All right, so, what would you
do if you were my boyfriend?
273
00:09:36,342 --> 00:09:37,719
It's nice, right?
274
00:09:37,844 --> 00:09:39,221
Very, very.
275
00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,017
What else?
276
00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:43,525
Well...
277
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:49,090
I've wanted to put my
hand here all night.
278
00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:52,092
Then what?
279
00:09:52,525 --> 00:09:56,098
Then I'd probably lean in,
kind of like this.
280
00:09:58,731 --> 00:10:02,304
♪ There's a million reasons ♪
281
00:10:02,402 --> 00:10:04,939
♪ A million ways ♪
282
00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:08,148
♪ A million words ♪
283
00:10:08,241 --> 00:10:11,450
♪ But I've said all I can say ♪
284
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:17,220
♪ Just wanna be your lover ♪
285
00:10:19,786 --> 00:10:20,787
(SIGHS)
286
00:10:35,902 --> 00:10:36,903
(CLATTERING)
287
00:10:47,013 --> 00:10:48,014
(CLEARS THROAT)
288
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:53,924
You don't have to rush off.
289
00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:56,356
(CHUCKLES)
Hi.
290
00:10:56,990 --> 00:10:58,867
Um, hi.
(CHUCKLES)
291
00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:00,934
I do, actually, um...
292
00:11:01,861 --> 00:11:05,331
It's been a slice of heaven,
really, but I have to go home now.
293
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:06,466
Let me turn the light on.
294
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:07,600
No, no, no!
No need to do that.
295
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:08,941
Why?
296
00:11:09,102 --> 00:11:10,342
It's a rule of mine.
297
00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:11,437
(CHUCKLES)
298
00:11:12,472 --> 00:11:14,474
You got a lot of rules, lady.
299
00:11:14,541 --> 00:11:15,542
Hmm.
300
00:11:15,842 --> 00:11:16,843
You need this?
301
00:11:17,143 --> 00:11:19,214
(CHUCKLES)
There it is, yeah.
302
00:11:20,980 --> 00:11:23,187
Thanks for that.
303
00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:25,455
Should I walk you out?
304
00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:29,493
No, we both know what happened
the last time you did that.
305
00:11:30,890 --> 00:11:33,210
That kind of makes me wanna
walk you out even more, though.
306
00:11:33,393 --> 00:11:34,394
(CHUCKLES)
307
00:11:35,628 --> 00:11:36,629
(CLEARS THROAT)
308
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:43,210
Great. Um, thanks!
309
00:11:43,303 --> 00:11:44,304
Mmm-hmm, yeah.
310
00:11:51,678 --> 00:11:52,679
(DOOR CLOSES)
311
00:11:53,146 --> 00:11:55,820
DEBBIE: I can't believe I slept
with him on the first date.
312
00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:59,091
It wasn't even your date. It was mine.
Tell me everything.
313
00:11:59,185 --> 00:12:02,997
His eyes, his body, his mouth.
314
00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:05,002
(GASPS)
He didn't!
315
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:06,765
You lucky bitch!
316
00:12:06,859 --> 00:12:08,532
Mmm-hmm.
(LAUGHS)
317
00:12:08,595 --> 00:12:10,575
Bernie doesn't?
Of course not.
318
00:12:10,663 --> 00:12:12,574
Why not?
Well, you ask him.
319
00:12:12,665 --> 00:12:14,508
Joan,
where the bathroom at, baby?
320
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:15,841
Bernie?
321
00:12:15,868 --> 00:12:17,575
Mmm-hmm. Why don't you
like cunnilingus?
322
00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:19,581
I don't even know who the bitch is.
What are you talking about?
323
00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:21,686
(ENAEUUE)
Hey.
324
00:12:23,176 --> 00:12:26,385
I should go in there right now and
force him to wear the thigh muffs.
325
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:27,857
(BOTH LAUGHING)
326
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:29,052
DANNY: Yeah.
327
00:12:29,849 --> 00:12:33,194
Just remember, everything is covered
under a full service warranty.
328
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:36,089
Food handler and VIP branch.
329
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:38,533
Temperature and cut resistant.
330
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,093
Uh-huh.
331
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:41,761
(CLEARS THROAT)
332
00:12:41,861 --> 00:12:43,772
Hey, can I call you
right back? Thanks.
333
00:12:43,863 --> 00:12:44,967
Yo.
334
00:12:45,064 --> 00:12:46,544
Hey. You cover for
me with the Hobbit?
335
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:47,600
Yeah, I told him you
went to the dentist.
336
00:12:47,700 --> 00:12:49,771
You might want to actually brush
your teeth to make it believable.
337
00:12:49,869 --> 00:12:51,610
That's funny, Danny.
That's real funny.
338
00:12:51,704 --> 00:12:53,445
Hey! Let's start
this day off right.
339
00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:54,950
'Sup, boy?
340
00:12:55,041 --> 00:12:56,577
Huh? I'm shaking your hand.
Why?
341
00:12:56,643 --> 00:12:58,554
'Cause I'm congratulating you
on growing your dick back.
342
00:12:58,611 --> 00:12:59,612
You banged Debbie, man.
343
00:12:59,712 --> 00:13:00,713
How do you know this?
344
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,123
'Cause she told me after I
banged her this morning.
345
00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,660
You see I'm
wearing the same stuff.
346
00:13:03,750 --> 00:13:05,790
I'm lying, dude. Your girl,
my girl, they roommates.
347
00:13:05,885 --> 00:13:07,159
She's not my girl. Oh, you
want her to be your girl.
348
00:13:07,253 --> 00:13:08,254
She's not my girl!
349
00:13:08,321 --> 00:13:09,459
I dare you to
look at me with those
350
00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:10,727
little icy,
baby blue eyes of yours
351
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,133
and tell me that you don't
want her to be your girl.
352
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:14,000
I just met her. It was nothing
but about last night.
353
00:13:14,093 --> 00:13:15,094
Did you text her, Danny?
354
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:16,161
I don't have her number.
355
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:18,140
You're gonna get it.
After all that nasty stuff
356
00:13:18,231 --> 00:13:20,108
you did last night,
she gonna find you.
357
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:21,366
Hey, what do you think of her?
358
00:13:21,401 --> 00:13:22,641
You just didn't
care and now you
359
00:13:22,735 --> 00:13:24,015
want to know
what I think of her?
360
00:13:24,070 --> 00:13:25,950
Uh, I think she looks good,
I think she's smart,
361
00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:27,781
dude,
straight-up wife material.
362
00:13:28,608 --> 00:13:31,418
Or she could be
Alison all over again.
363
00:13:31,687 --> 00:13:32,887
Now,
I'm gonna be a good friend
364
00:13:32,912 --> 00:13:33,982
and pretend you
didn't just say that.
365
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:35,320
I'm gonna act like I
didn't see you check
366
00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:36,769
your Facebook for
friend requests.
367
00:13:36,783 --> 00:13:39,093
Hey,
buddies, dudes, compadres.
368
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:40,688
Uh, Bernie, corporate
office guys are here.
369
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,322
They did not buy
the dentist thing.
370
00:13:42,422 --> 00:13:43,924
So should I tell
them you were...
371
00:13:43,990 --> 00:13:45,936
I was eating pussy
all night, Keller.
372
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,604
Oh, uh...
(CHUCKLES)
373
00:13:47,794 --> 00:13:49,967
Wow, hey, nice.
(CHUCKLES)
374
00:13:50,029 --> 00:13:51,838
Why is corporate here?
Asset review.
375
00:13:51,931 --> 00:13:54,172
They just showed up. I was
like, "What, no phone call?"
376
00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:56,372
(MOCKING LAUGHTER)
377
00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:57,880
They were like, "If you
try to be funny again",
378
00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,404
"we're gonna rip
your throat out.“."
379
00:13:59,472 --> 00:14:01,679
Which is,
like, so them, you know?
380
00:14:01,774 --> 00:14:02,809
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
381
00:14:02,875 --> 00:14:04,354
Anyway, Bernie, luckily,
you're prepared, right?
382
00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:05,855
Sure am, boss.
Let's do it.
383
00:14:05,945 --> 00:14:08,016
Follow you,
my fearless leader.
384
00:14:08,881 --> 00:14:10,189
Go get 'em.
385
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:11,885
Really?
386
00:14:11,984 --> 00:14:14,021
Clean it up bitch.
Stop, I'm playing.
387
00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:15,860
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
388
00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:20,828
♪ Never stop never giving up ♪
389
00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:23,062
♪ Never stop never giving up ♪
390
00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:25,398
♪ Never stop never giving up ♪
391
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,342
♪ Give it up ♪
392
00:14:29,402 --> 00:14:30,403
(CHUCKLES)
393
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:31,675
Debbie, are you with us?
394
00:14:34,807 --> 00:14:36,912
♪ Spending some time ♪
395
00:14:37,643 --> 00:14:39,816
(MOANING AND CHUCKLING)
396
00:14:39,979 --> 00:14:42,220
♪ Making plans to last forever ♪
397
00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:44,158
Did you?
Yeah.
398
00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:45,218
(CAMERA CLICKING)
399
00:14:46,062 --> 00:14:48,062
Where you going, Danny?
Danny, what are you doing?
400
00:14:48,087 --> 00:14:49,361
Are you gonna go see
your little fuck-buddy?
401
00:14:49,422 --> 00:14:51,231
Hey.
I'm serious, don't go. Okay?
402
00:14:51,324 --> 00:14:53,235
If you stay,
I'll let you see the taint.
403
00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,737
No.
I wanna show it to you.
404
00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:55,999
Fuck, man, I gotta go!
405
00:14:56,095 --> 00:14:57,233
You gonna go look
at Debbie's taint?
406
00:14:57,330 --> 00:14:58,673
Yeah,
it's much better than yours.
407
00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,108
James has seen my taint!
408
00:15:00,199 --> 00:15:01,200
You saw it.
409
00:15:01,267 --> 00:15:02,268
(ALL LAUGHING)
410
00:15:02,368 --> 00:15:04,746
♪ Never stop ♪
♪ Never give it up ♪
411
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,240
KELLER: Bernie!
412
00:15:07,697 --> 00:15:09,417
Well, it just depends
on your monthly sales.
413
00:15:09,442 --> 00:15:10,580
Bernie...
414
00:15:10,676 --> 00:15:12,587
Where's Danny?
I don't know, ask him.
415
00:15:12,678 --> 00:15:13,918
I would if I
could find the man.
416
00:15:14,113 --> 00:15:16,252
JOAN: Debbie, where are you?
417
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:18,590
I need one more teeth
cleaning for my log.
418
00:15:18,684 --> 00:15:21,460
Hey, if you're with Danny,
don't brush after,
419
00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:22,624
I need a challenge.
420
00:15:22,722 --> 00:15:23,723
(GROANING)
421
00:15:23,790 --> 00:15:27,704
(SCOFFS) Okay, that's enough.
I will hurt you in this chair.
422
00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:31,867
♪ Never stop ♪
♪ Never stop I ♪
423
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:33,099
There you go.
424
00:15:33,199 --> 00:15:34,200
Thank you, Case.
425
00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:36,543
(CLEARS THROAT)
Thanks again for covering my ass, Danny.
426
00:15:36,602 --> 00:15:39,378
And I'll get you the last two
months next week. I promise.
427
00:15:39,872 --> 00:15:42,250
Don't take this the wrong
way, I'm just curious.
428
00:15:42,308 --> 00:15:44,149
Why can't you pay your bill?
You got customers.
429
00:15:44,210 --> 00:15:46,156
BERNIE: Yeah, Casey,
everybody's inside drinking.
430
00:15:46,245 --> 00:15:47,383
Yeah, but that
doesn't mean they're paying.
431
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,155
Why? Are you running tabs?
What is this, 1978?
432
00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:51,956
Look, what do you want me to do?
They're my regulars.
433
00:15:52,051 --> 00:15:53,052
Get 'em MasterCards.
434
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,200
It's tough times right now.
435
00:15:54,220 --> 00:15:55,220
That's not your problem.
436
00:15:55,254 --> 00:15:57,325
It is my problem.
These are my friends.
437
00:15:57,423 --> 00:16:00,063
Casey, you gotta start looking
at these guys as your customers.
438
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:02,106
Damn sure do, Case.
That's your problem.
439
00:16:02,161 --> 00:16:04,641
What is up with you? Did you
get back together with Alison?
440
00:16:04,730 --> 00:16:06,573
He's fucking this new chick.
Good, I'm real happy for you.
441
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:08,134
Not for nothing,
when you were with Alison,
442
00:16:08,234 --> 00:16:09,975
you weren't the coolest guy in
the world to hang around with.
443
00:16:10,069 --> 00:16:11,070
(CHUCKLES)
444
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:12,480
Just saying.
445
00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:13,983
Thanks again.
446
00:16:14,073 --> 00:16:15,245
Hey, you going to
the movies tonight?
447
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:16,580
I don't know.
448
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:19,014
Are you coming to the movies tonight,
or are you gonna flake again?
449
00:16:19,111 --> 00:16:20,112
DEBBIE: I don't know.
450
00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:21,920
Why? Is Danny coming?
451
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,359
You know, it would be good for you
two to go out in public together
452
00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:25,588
instead of being vampires.
453
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,324
I've never done the serious
relationship thing,
454
00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:29,832
but I smell not
ready all over him.
455
00:16:29,922 --> 00:16:32,664
Well, maybe you're not
sniffing in the right places.
456
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:35,495
WOMAN: (ON SCREEN) Hello?
457
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:38,536
MAN: Oh, I'm sorry, I
don't mean to bother you.
458
00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:42,044
You were the only house with the lights on.
I just lost control of my car.
459
00:16:45,938 --> 00:16:46,939
(WHOOPS)
460
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:48,441
(GROANS)
461
00:16:48,774 --> 00:16:51,482
Whooped your ass, boy.
And I gave you a head start.
462
00:16:51,611 --> 00:16:53,352
Why you bail on me on Saturday?
I was busy.
463
00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:54,789
Doing what?
Writing in your diary?
464
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,019
Man, if you don't want
to deal with Debbie,
465
00:16:56,115 --> 00:16:58,186
why don't you just stop putting
parts of you in parts of her?
466
00:16:58,284 --> 00:16:59,354
Do you have
a problem with that?
467
00:16:59,485 --> 00:17:00,520
Uh, actually, I do.
468
00:17:00,620 --> 00:17:02,020
Okay, you not
the one that's getting
469
00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:03,227
an earful from Joan, man.
I am!
470
00:17:03,322 --> 00:17:04,892
Nothing makes you
more unattractive
471
00:17:05,024 --> 00:17:06,560
than your best friend
dicking over her friend.
472
00:17:06,659 --> 00:17:07,797
I'm not dicking
Debbie over!
473
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:08,964
You're doing the fuck-buddy
dance right now.
474
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,530
What?
The fuck-buddy dance.
475
00:17:10,630 --> 00:17:12,871
When you do that dance,
somebody gets hurt.
476
00:17:12,965 --> 00:17:14,137
Nine times out of 10,
it's the person
477
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,472
with the vagina
and I'm telling you,
478
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:16,843
I'm not gonna be
fraternizing with the enemy.
479
00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:18,177
That's the stupidest thing
I've ever heard you say,
480
00:17:18,304 --> 00:17:20,264
and you've said some stupid shit.
It's not stupid.
481
00:17:20,306 --> 00:17:22,752
You know what this is?
It's the Lando Calrissian effect.
482
00:17:22,842 --> 00:17:24,583
I'm out here getting
pussy in Cloud City,
483
00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:26,485
giving Han Solo
a run for his money.
484
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,219
Now when they find out that
I'm friends with Darth Vader,
485
00:17:28,314 --> 00:17:29,314
know what's gonna happen?
486
00:17:29,348 --> 00:17:30,588
I'm gonna get stuck in
the Millennium Falcon
487
00:17:30,683 --> 00:17:32,044
with a racially
offensive co-pilot.
488
00:17:32,084 --> 00:17:33,995
It's the Star Wars
equivalent to castration.
489
00:17:34,944 --> 00:17:36,464
Dude, you either
get in or you get out.
490
00:17:36,489 --> 00:17:37,900
Fine, but I'm
not the bad guy.
491
00:17:37,990 --> 00:17:41,403
(IMITATING YODA)
You will be. You will be.
492
00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:43,531
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
493
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:44,763
(BALLPARK MUSIC PLAYING)
494
00:17:44,830 --> 00:17:45,900
- ♪ MAN: I Say hey ♪
- ♪ CHORUS: Say who? ♪
495
00:17:45,998 --> 00:17:47,944
MAN: I Swinging at
the plate Say hey.
496
00:17:48,034 --> 00:17:50,014
- ♪ CHORUS: Say who ♪
- ♪ MAN: Say Willie I ♪
497
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,104
Danny!
498
00:17:51,370 --> 00:17:52,678
Hey.
499
00:17:57,243 --> 00:17:58,745
Hi, stranger.
500
00:18:01,347 --> 00:18:02,792
(CROWD CHEERING)
501
00:18:03,349 --> 00:18:04,350
BOTH; Mwah.
502
00:18:05,184 --> 00:18:06,527
Told you I had great seats.
503
00:18:07,386 --> 00:18:08,421
(CHUCKLES)
504
00:18:08,521 --> 00:18:10,467
Yeah, these are great.
505
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:13,260
For you.
506
00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:14,895
Oh, thank you.
Yeah.
507
00:18:16,813 --> 00:18:18,573
There you go. Now you're ready.
Is that good?
508
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:19,804
Now you're ready.
Look at that.
509
00:18:22,568 --> 00:18:24,241
Can't we move closer?
510
00:18:24,303 --> 00:18:25,976
We could,
but these are my seats.
511
00:18:26,072 --> 00:18:28,575
Yeah,
but those can be our seats.
512
00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:31,950
Well, it doesn't
really work like that.
513
00:18:32,044 --> 00:18:33,421
Why, are there seat cops?
514
00:18:33,479 --> 00:18:34,958
These are my dad's seats.
515
00:18:35,047 --> 00:18:36,958
He inherited them from his
dad, so it's a thing.
516
00:18:37,049 --> 00:18:38,050
Oh.
517
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,790
Yeah. You get it, right?
518
00:18:39,885 --> 00:18:41,990
Uh, yeah, I get it. I do.
519
00:18:42,088 --> 00:18:43,761
These are great seats.
520
00:18:43,823 --> 00:18:44,823
Good.
521
00:18:44,890 --> 00:18:45,925
Where's Joan?
522
00:18:45,992 --> 00:18:48,973
Oh she's, uh, gonna meet us here.
Where's Bernie?
523
00:18:49,061 --> 00:18:51,234
Uh, he said he's
gonna meet us here.
524
00:18:53,733 --> 00:18:54,734
BOTH: Right.
525
00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:57,141
Wait, so do they
know we set them up?
526
00:18:57,236 --> 00:18:59,307
Yeah, baby.
I mean, they ain't stupid.
527
00:18:59,405 --> 00:19:03,251
I know they're not stupid. I just...
I want them to work it out.
528
00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:04,310
Are you serious,
do we still need these?
529
00:19:04,443 --> 00:19:05,444
Yes.
530
00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:06,512
When's the last
time you got tested?
531
00:19:06,612 --> 00:19:08,922
Tested? I don't know.
I was in college.
532
00:19:09,015 --> 00:19:11,996
College? I am tested every
year at my Pap smear.
533
00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:13,324
Bernie,
you need to get tested.
534
00:19:13,419 --> 00:19:15,194
Okay, first of all, do I wanna
know what a Pap smear is?
535
00:19:15,287 --> 00:19:16,595
No. Mmm-mmm.
536
00:19:17,123 --> 00:19:19,103
- Take the test, I'll take the test.
- Thank you.
537
00:19:21,861 --> 00:19:23,272
Wait a minute.
Give me a second!
538
00:19:23,362 --> 00:19:24,705
I'm keep...
539
00:19:24,797 --> 00:19:25,798
(CONDOM SNAPPING)
540
00:19:25,865 --> 00:19:26,866
That's it, it's on.
541
00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:28,377
Wait, wait, no, it's not.
542
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,174
- See, this is what happened last time...
- Is on.
543
00:19:30,269 --> 00:19:32,180
- It's on!
- Are you sure?
544
00:19:32,229 --> 00:19:33,752
I'm... I know when it's on!
545
00:19:34,306 --> 00:19:36,650
Now that I got this
big old gift wrapped,
546
00:19:36,776 --> 00:19:39,057
- let's get it going while the tree is still up.
- (CHUCKLING)
547
00:19:39,145 --> 00:19:40,522
All right. Get on top.
548
00:19:40,613 --> 00:19:42,524
I'm not getting on top.
You gotta get on top.
549
00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:44,492
I got on top the last time.
I'm not getting on top.
550
00:19:44,550 --> 00:19:46,188
No, that shit be fucking with my knees.
I'm not doing it.
551
00:19:46,285 --> 00:19:47,406
But you know my back is bad.
552
00:19:47,486 --> 00:19:48,521
Rock, paper, scissors.
553
00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:49,691
Rock, paper, scissors,
the loser gets on top
554
00:19:49,789 --> 00:19:50,790
All right. Fine.
On three.
555
00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:51,857
Okay.
Ready?
556
00:19:51,957 --> 00:19:54,062
BOTH: One, two, three.
557
00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:57,004
That's a tie. We gotta go side.
Lift your cheek up.
558
00:19:57,063 --> 00:19:59,373
Oh there you go, there you go, baby.
Oh, there it is.
559
00:19:59,465 --> 00:20:02,036
That's what I'm talking about, baby!
Good defense, boy!
560
00:20:02,301 --> 00:20:06,545
(WHOOPS) Nice play, get him at
third, get him at third! Got him!
561
00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:08,084
- Did they win?
- What?
562
00:20:08,174 --> 00:20:09,380
Did they win?
563
00:20:09,508 --> 00:20:10,714
No, no, it was just
a great fucking play.
564
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:11,811
Didn't you see that?
565
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:14,380
No, I blinked and then something
happened that made you dance.
566
00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,357
That's the thing
about this game,
567
00:20:16,482 --> 00:20:18,393
you gotta stay
in the moment. Right?
568
00:20:18,484 --> 00:20:20,486
You can't worry about
what's gonna happen,
569
00:20:20,586 --> 00:20:22,566
right, otherwise
you're gonna miss...
570
00:20:23,989 --> 00:20:25,491
Miss the best part.
571
00:20:26,525 --> 00:20:27,526
(BAT STRIKES BALL)
572
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,501
(CROWD CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)
573
00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:35,204
You know, she just needs a little...
Wait, push!
574
00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:36,405
Move your leg!
Push!
575
00:20:36,502 --> 00:20:38,209
I'll make a deal with you.
You can talk
576
00:20:38,337 --> 00:20:40,044
if you put
the pillow under your stomach.
577
00:20:40,106 --> 00:20:42,017
Okay.
Put it under your stomach.
578
00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:43,519
Right there. Right there.
Don't move, don't move.
579
00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:44,577
I got it!
I got it! That's it!
580
00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:46,247
That's it. Game over!
That's it!
581
00:20:46,655 --> 00:20:48,856
DANNY: My father used to bring
me here after every game.
582
00:20:48,881 --> 00:20:50,258
Your dad
brought you to a bar?
583
00:20:50,349 --> 00:20:51,885
Casey's is more
than just a bar.
584
00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:53,587
I mean, just look around.
It's rich.
585
00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:55,922
Um, is there another room?
586
00:20:56,021 --> 00:20:57,261
Stop, stop. Stop-
587
00:20:57,356 --> 00:20:58,767
(LAUGHS)
588
00:20:59,725 --> 00:21:01,245
This place is like
a second home to me.
589
00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:02,261
I've been coming
here since I was...
590
00:21:02,361 --> 00:21:04,602
Since you could wrap your chubby
little fingers around a baseball.
591
00:21:04,697 --> 00:21:05,698
Oh, you used to
be chubby! So cute.
592
00:21:05,765 --> 00:21:06,766
No, he's just...
593
00:21:06,866 --> 00:21:07,936
That's really cute.
594
00:21:08,033 --> 00:21:10,274
See, that's
an entirely different story.
595
00:21:10,402 --> 00:21:12,712
All right, I gotta go.
I'll be back.
596
00:21:13,372 --> 00:21:14,646
CASEY: Sorry, pal.
597
00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:19,384
You and his dad
still friends?
598
00:21:19,979 --> 00:21:22,220
No, he fucked me over.
599
00:21:23,415 --> 00:21:25,395
Died of bone
cancer 20 years ago.
600
00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:26,619
(GROANS)
601
00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:29,159
Were you guys close?
602
00:21:29,255 --> 00:21:30,996
Yeah. My best friend.
603
00:21:31,090 --> 00:21:32,091
Really?
604
00:21:34,927 --> 00:21:35,928
What?
605
00:21:37,229 --> 00:21:38,230
Nothing.
606
00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:40,243
- What?
- Just interesting.
607
00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:41,835
What's interesting?
608
00:21:42,334 --> 00:21:44,814
Danny has never brought a lady
into this bar before.
609
00:21:44,904 --> 00:21:46,975
Really? I'm the first?
610
00:21:47,072 --> 00:21:48,352
Swear on Jackie
Robinson's grave.
611
00:21:48,574 --> 00:21:49,644
Another first.
612
00:21:49,742 --> 00:21:51,312
Well, that was good.
I like that.
613
00:21:51,410 --> 00:21:52,411
(CLICKS TONGUE)
614
00:21:52,511 --> 00:21:53,683
(MOANING)
615
00:21:55,347 --> 00:21:57,623
Wait. Wait, wait.
616
00:21:58,250 --> 00:22:00,093
You need to
stretch or something?
617
00:22:00,252 --> 00:22:02,095
This isn't just sex, right?
618
00:22:02,154 --> 00:22:04,600
Well, this is
technically sex, babe. Yes.
619
00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:06,694
There's a couple variants of
this theme that we could do,
620
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:07,827
but for the most part,
it's sex.
621
00:22:07,927 --> 00:22:10,931
I know, but we mean something
to each other, right?
622
00:22:11,597 --> 00:22:13,201
Yeah. What... Like, yes.
623
00:22:13,299 --> 00:22:15,472
So, am I your girlfriend?
624
00:22:16,535 --> 00:22:17,536
Um...
625
00:22:18,137 --> 00:22:19,775
Damn!
626
00:22:19,839 --> 00:22:21,546
Yeah, (STAMMERING)
you my girlfriend!
627
00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:23,444
- Really?
- Yes!
628
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:25,511
And you feel something for me?
629
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:28,681
Yes.
630
00:22:31,050 --> 00:22:32,188
You do?
631
00:22:32,284 --> 00:22:33,285
Yes.
632
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:34,456
You feel it?
633
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:35,658
I feel it.
634
00:22:35,721 --> 00:22:37,132
You feel it?
635
00:22:37,223 --> 00:22:38,566
Oh, God.
636
00:22:38,657 --> 00:22:41,968
I feel something.
Oh, hit me again, baby.
637
00:22:42,027 --> 00:22:43,028
(GRUNTS)
638
00:22:43,128 --> 00:22:46,132
Oh! Bitch! What? Knock your damn head off!
That's my ear!
639
00:22:46,198 --> 00:22:47,541
(TEARFULLY)
You told me to hit you again.
640
00:22:47,633 --> 00:22:49,374
Yeah, I didn't say
hit me hard like that!
641
00:22:49,468 --> 00:22:51,243
Did you have to call me a name?
You yelled at me.
642
00:22:51,337 --> 00:22:53,248
I didn't mean to do it like that.
You hit me in my ear.
643
00:22:53,339 --> 00:22:54,374
I didn't know
it was your ear...
644
00:22:54,473 --> 00:22:55,473
I can't hear you!
645
00:22:55,507 --> 00:22:56,987
I didn't know it
was your fucking ear!
646
00:22:57,076 --> 00:22:58,555
Say it in the other fucking ear!
(SCREAMING)
647
00:22:58,644 --> 00:23:02,387
I'm sorry! I didn't
mean to hit you! I'm upset!
648
00:23:02,481 --> 00:23:04,392
Right. Goddamn!
Okay.
649
00:23:04,483 --> 00:23:05,826
Call me your girlfriend again.
650
00:23:05,918 --> 00:23:07,192
All right.
You're my girlfriend.
651
00:23:07,253 --> 00:23:08,253
Give me a kiss!
652
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,391
You keep yelling at me.
653
00:23:10,489 --> 00:23:11,489
You're my girlfriend.
654
00:23:11,523 --> 00:23:12,524
I'm your...
Huh?
655
00:23:12,591 --> 00:23:13,934
(YELLING)
I'm your girlfriend!
656
00:23:14,894 --> 00:23:16,498
So, is it true?
657
00:23:16,929 --> 00:23:18,067
Is what true?
658
00:23:18,163 --> 00:23:21,007
You've never brought
a lady there before?
659
00:23:22,334 --> 00:23:23,335
He told you that?
660
00:23:24,837 --> 00:23:26,180
You're the first.
661
00:23:29,174 --> 00:23:30,676
So, what now?
662
00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:33,189
♪ MAN: In your head ♪
663
00:23:33,612 --> 00:23:36,616
♪ I see the pain in your eyes ♪
664
00:23:37,116 --> 00:23:39,357
♪ I'll stay another night ♪
665
00:23:41,353 --> 00:23:43,594
♪ It's okay ♪
666
00:23:43,689 --> 00:23:45,032
DEBBIE: When's your birthday?
667
00:23:45,124 --> 00:23:46,432
December fifth.
668
00:23:46,692 --> 00:23:48,103
Parents still together?
669
00:23:48,227 --> 00:23:49,706
Divorced when I was 13.
670
00:23:50,796 --> 00:23:52,104
How about you?
671
00:23:52,197 --> 00:23:54,040
It's just my mom.
672
00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:57,376
She's in D.C. She's gonna retire
as a school teacher, so...
673
00:23:58,203 --> 00:23:59,705
Only child?
674
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:00,876
Yeah.
675
00:24:04,043 --> 00:24:05,750
Why do I feel like
I'm being quizzed,
676
00:24:05,811 --> 00:24:07,813
and if I get something wrong,
we're gonna break up?
677
00:24:07,913 --> 00:24:08,914
(GASPS)
678
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:11,394
Did you just
confirm that we're dating?
679
00:24:13,218 --> 00:24:14,579
Guess I let
the cat out of the bag.
680
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,393
I think the cat's
been out of the bag
681
00:24:16,555 --> 00:24:18,159
and wandering
the room for some time now.
682
00:24:18,257 --> 00:24:19,258
Mmm-hmm.
683
00:24:19,658 --> 00:24:20,659
Meow.
684
00:24:23,395 --> 00:24:25,068
(CHUCKLES)
Meow.
685
00:24:25,331 --> 00:24:26,332
Meow.
686
00:24:31,637 --> 00:24:32,638
(CHUCKLES)
687
00:24:36,141 --> 00:24:37,245
I love this.
688
00:24:40,079 --> 00:24:41,649
DEBBIE: What annoys you most?
689
00:24:41,747 --> 00:24:43,249
Amusement parks.
690
00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:44,316
Hmm.
691
00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:46,156
What?
Do you also hate America?
692
00:24:46,251 --> 00:24:48,857
I can't stand the concept
of organized fun.
693
00:24:48,954 --> 00:24:51,628
You know, it's like, have fun now!
You know, do it now!
694
00:24:51,690 --> 00:24:52,794
It's like New
Year's Eve, you know?
695
00:24:52,858 --> 00:24:55,099
Resolution now!
Better life now!
696
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:57,538
Absolutely not. New Year's is awesome.
You're just stupid.
697
00:24:57,629 --> 00:24:58,801
What? You're stupid.
698
00:24:58,931 --> 00:25:00,103
Your face is stupid.
699
00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:01,371
Your penis is stupid.
My what?
700
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:03,207
Your penis, ow!
(LAUGHS) Is what?
701
00:25:03,469 --> 00:25:04,709
Anytime I can give you a hand.
702
00:25:04,803 --> 00:25:06,282
I love this movie.
703
00:25:06,372 --> 00:25:07,783
Yeah, I love this movie, too.
704
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:09,046
You like chick-flicks?
705
00:25:09,141 --> 00:25:11,212
It's not a chick-flick.
This is a dude's movie.
706
00:25:11,377 --> 00:25:12,515
Chick.
Dude.
707
00:25:12,611 --> 00:25:13,851
Chick. Chick. Dude.
Dude.
708
00:25:13,946 --> 00:25:14,981
Chick.
See?
709
00:25:15,114 --> 00:25:17,560
Shit. You fucking... Okay, okay.
(LAUGHS)
710
00:25:18,117 --> 00:25:19,653
I see.
711
00:25:22,454 --> 00:25:24,024
I don't want this to end.
712
00:25:24,123 --> 00:25:26,694
I hate Sunday afternoons.
713
00:25:26,792 --> 00:25:29,136
It's like,
countdown to reality.
714
00:25:31,063 --> 00:25:35,739
I normally play marathon sessions
of All-Star Battle Royale.
715
00:25:35,834 --> 00:25:38,576
I usually masturbate and
watch old episodes of House.
716
00:25:40,672 --> 00:25:41,742
Yep.
717
00:25:42,841 --> 00:25:43,876
That's good.
718
00:25:44,009 --> 00:25:45,716
- You like that?
- (LAUGHS)
719
00:25:47,479 --> 00:25:49,755
Mmm. I don't even want
to check my phone.
720
00:25:50,315 --> 00:25:51,555
Fuck it.
We'll do it together.
721
00:25:51,650 --> 00:25:52,685
(CLEARS THROAT)
722
00:25:52,751 --> 00:25:54,025
Count of three.
Uh-huh.
723
00:25:54,086 --> 00:25:56,430
One, two, three.
724
00:25:56,889 --> 00:25:57,890
(BEEPS)
725
00:25:57,990 --> 00:25:59,401
BOTH: Shit.
726
00:25:59,491 --> 00:26:02,870
Bernie Litko is an asshole! And I
liked him. I really liked him.
727
00:26:02,928 --> 00:26:04,066
I was so into him.
728
00:26:04,163 --> 00:26:05,574
And now I hope he
gets hit by a car
729
00:26:05,664 --> 00:26:08,110
and doesn't die,
but his dick gets paralyzed.
730
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,737
And he can only have sex through
a series of hand signals.
731
00:26:10,836 --> 00:26:12,782
Slow down.
Slow down. What happened?
732
00:26:13,505 --> 00:26:15,280
Um, excuse me.
You can't drink in here.
733
00:26:15,374 --> 00:26:16,910
Alcohol only after 6:00 P.M.
734
00:26:17,009 --> 00:26:18,750
Well, isn't it after 6:00 P.M.
in Korea?
735
00:26:18,844 --> 00:26:21,347
I don't know. I'll call
my grandmother in China
736
00:26:21,413 --> 00:26:22,551
and ask her if she
knows any Koreans.
737
00:26:22,614 --> 00:26:23,614
Nice.
738
00:26:23,682 --> 00:26:24,888
(SPEAKS NATIVE DIALECT)
Bitch.
739
00:26:24,950 --> 00:26:26,430
- Did she just call me a bitch?
- Stop it!
740
00:26:26,518 --> 00:26:27,519
(SIGHS)
741
00:26:27,886 --> 00:26:29,422
He broke...
Up with me.
742
00:26:29,521 --> 00:26:31,194
Get out of here.
Here's the thing.
743
00:26:31,256 --> 00:26:32,860
I explained to her,
I said, technically,
744
00:26:33,025 --> 00:26:34,586
we're not even
boyfriend and girlfriend,
745
00:26:34,626 --> 00:26:36,765
so, technically,
you can't break up with me.
746
00:26:36,862 --> 00:26:39,274
Did she give you a reason for not
technically breaking up with you?
747
00:26:39,364 --> 00:26:42,470
She's a woman, Danny. I mean, she
bitched about a few minor things.
748
00:26:42,568 --> 00:26:44,104
See, my parents...
749
00:26:44,203 --> 00:26:46,479
Are coming to town and I'm
like, "I want to meet them."
750
00:26:46,572 --> 00:26:47,744
And he's like, "No way."
751
00:26:47,806 --> 00:26:51,083
And I'm like, "Why not?" And he
goes, "Because you're not Jewish."
752
00:26:51,143 --> 00:26:52,417
He's...
Jewish?
753
00:26:52,544 --> 00:26:53,784
How did I not know that?
754
00:26:53,879 --> 00:26:55,119
A, because I'm not.
755
00:26:55,214 --> 00:26:56,955
And B, because when
you and I were fucking,
756
00:26:57,082 --> 00:26:58,823
you never asked
to meet my parents.
757
00:26:58,917 --> 00:26:59,952
True.
758
00:27:00,052 --> 00:27:02,225
And, so what?
I dropped the Jew-bomb.
759
00:27:02,287 --> 00:27:04,961
She can't say anything about it.
If she does, she's racist.
760
00:27:05,057 --> 00:27:08,903
Bernie, dropping the Jew-bomb after
months of fucking her? Real mature.
761
00:27:08,961 --> 00:27:10,668
Don't do that, Danny.
Don't judge me.
762
00:27:10,762 --> 00:27:12,901
I like Joan.
I think Joan is great in bed.
763
00:27:12,965 --> 00:27:15,969
I think the girl's ass should be
worshipped by indigenous peoples.
764
00:27:16,068 --> 00:27:18,241
But when you start talking about
girlfriend and boyfriend,
765
00:27:18,303 --> 00:27:20,681
and meeting the parents,
it's exit time for me.
766
00:27:20,772 --> 00:27:22,892
Whoa, weren't you the one
that said get in or get out?
767
00:27:23,242 --> 00:27:25,322
Part of getting in, genius,
is knowing when to get...
768
00:27:25,410 --> 00:27:27,185
Ouch!
You're not listening.
769
00:27:27,279 --> 00:27:29,919
I had to break up with him
because I'm not Jewish.
770
00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:31,154
What kind of weak-ass man...
771
00:27:31,250 --> 00:27:33,491
Hold up, hold up, hold up. I thought
you said he broke up with you.
772
00:27:33,585 --> 00:27:35,225
Well, he did.
Because I did the only thing
773
00:27:35,254 --> 00:27:37,325
a red-blooded woman can do
in that situation.
774
00:27:37,422 --> 00:27:39,424
I forced an ultimatum.
You choose me,
775
00:27:39,591 --> 00:27:41,537
or you choose your
family and heritage.
776
00:27:41,627 --> 00:27:44,870
And he chose 3,000 years
of beautiful tradition.
777
00:27:44,963 --> 00:27:47,000
Can you believe
that asshole?
778
00:27:47,099 --> 00:27:49,010
- How's Bernie?
- Fine. How's Joan?
779
00:27:49,101 --> 00:27:50,375
Fine. How's work?
780
00:27:50,502 --> 00:27:51,810
Good. You?
781
00:27:51,870 --> 00:27:53,110
Great.
782
00:27:53,205 --> 00:27:54,377
I'm hungry, woman. Let's go.
783
00:27:54,473 --> 00:27:55,474
Voilà.
There it is.
784
00:27:55,541 --> 00:27:57,861
You know, you could really use
a dining room table in here.
785
00:27:58,277 --> 00:28:00,883
Oh, my God. Someone stole
my dining room table.
786
00:28:00,979 --> 00:28:02,686
And a dining room. Holy shit.
787
00:28:02,781 --> 00:28:05,193
I'm serious. What do you do
when you have people come over?
788
00:28:05,284 --> 00:28:06,285
I don't have people over.
789
00:28:06,351 --> 00:28:07,625
Hello. What am I?
790
00:28:07,719 --> 00:28:08,959
Special.
791
00:28:09,321 --> 00:28:10,857
Mmm. Thank you.
792
00:28:11,123 --> 00:28:12,227
Come here.
793
00:28:13,992 --> 00:28:14,993
(MOANS)
794
00:28:19,464 --> 00:28:20,585
I thought about you all day.
795
00:28:20,666 --> 00:28:21,667
I thought about
me all day, too.
796
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:22,801
You're such a dick.
797
00:28:22,968 --> 00:28:24,811
(BOTH MOANING)
798
00:28:31,843 --> 00:28:34,255
Been wearing that backpack for
longer than three weeks now.
799
00:28:34,346 --> 00:28:36,019
You're officially a lesbian.
800
00:28:36,081 --> 00:28:39,551
Some of us don't live here or
roll out of bed looking perfect.
801
00:28:39,651 --> 00:28:41,187
You do.
802
00:28:41,253 --> 00:28:42,425
Thank you.
Good morning.
803
00:28:42,521 --> 00:28:43,556
Good morning.
804
00:28:43,655 --> 00:28:44,759
Coming back tonight?
805
00:28:44,856 --> 00:28:45,857
Mmm-hmm.
806
00:28:46,258 --> 00:28:49,398
I gotta go by my place first, get
some more clothes for tomorrow.
807
00:28:49,528 --> 00:28:51,098
- You coming back tomorrow night?
- Mmm-hmm.
808
00:28:51,196 --> 00:28:52,197
And the night after that?
809
00:28:52,264 --> 00:28:55,177
Yep. I am.
Why? What's wrong?
810
00:28:55,234 --> 00:28:56,406
Well, you're just
always here.
811
00:28:56,835 --> 00:28:58,007
Okay.
812
00:28:58,070 --> 00:28:59,913
So, leave some stuff.
Take a drawer.
813
00:29:00,005 --> 00:29:01,746
A drawer?
814
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,616
A whole drawer for little old me?
Really, Danny?
815
00:29:04,710 --> 00:29:05,882
Yeah.
816
00:29:05,944 --> 00:29:07,265
You sure?
It's kind of a big deal.
817
00:29:08,180 --> 00:29:09,181
Mmm.
818
00:29:12,017 --> 00:29:13,018
(CLEARS THROAT)
819
00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:22,361
Keys.
820
00:29:22,427 --> 00:29:24,236
A drawer and keys?
821
00:29:24,296 --> 00:29:26,105
Somebody pinch me. Really.
822
00:29:26,198 --> 00:29:29,771
Keep talking that shit and I will
make sure you are late for work.
823
00:29:31,103 --> 00:29:32,104
(DEBBIE LAUGHS)
824
00:29:32,271 --> 00:29:35,081
JOAN: Mmm. Mmm-mmm. You know what?
I knew it. I knew it.
825
00:29:35,140 --> 00:29:38,314
I knew this would happen. I knew
you would move in with this guy!
826
00:29:38,410 --> 00:29:41,414
I just feel that
adults don't have roommates.
827
00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:42,788
They live with their
significant others.
828
00:29:42,881 --> 00:29:44,588
So, I am now
suddenly a child because
829
00:29:44,716 --> 00:29:46,389
you found a guy
you think you like?
830
00:29:46,485 --> 00:29:48,431
No, but Danny and I talked about it...
For what?
831
00:29:48,487 --> 00:29:50,091
Five minutes in bed?
832
00:29:50,155 --> 00:29:53,102
Joan, I'm giving you two months extra
rent until you find someone else.
833
00:29:53,158 --> 00:29:55,968
I just didn't think you were one of
those girls who drops her friends
834
00:29:56,061 --> 00:29:57,597
the second she
gets regular dick.
835
00:29:57,663 --> 00:29:59,643
Nice. So, um,
let me get this straight.
836
00:29:59,731 --> 00:30:02,678
I finally meet someone
that I really care about,
837
00:30:02,768 --> 00:30:06,272
and you think that I
should force a breakup,
838
00:30:06,338 --> 00:30:09,012
sit around stuffing my face
and complain constantly.
839
00:30:09,107 --> 00:30:10,177
I'm down if you are.
840
00:30:10,275 --> 00:30:12,448
If you want your 30s
to be a blur of parties,
841
00:30:12,511 --> 00:30:14,951
punctuated by teeth cleanings,
that's great. That's your life.
842
00:30:14,980 --> 00:30:17,824
I just want something different.
That means being spontaneous.
843
00:30:17,916 --> 00:30:19,987
You know what?
You are such a wild card.
844
00:30:20,085 --> 00:30:22,087
That's why
you're packing a week
845
00:30:22,254 --> 00:30:24,256
before the U-Haul
gets here, huh, Deb?
846
00:30:27,092 --> 00:30:30,369
Great. You know what?
Go, go! Just go!
847
00:30:31,263 --> 00:30:32,674
I give it two months.
848
00:30:32,764 --> 00:30:36,439
Three, tops!
And this is my shit, damn it!
849
00:30:40,172 --> 00:30:41,173
(GROANS)
850
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:43,044
BERNIE: When I said get in
or get out, I didn't mean
851
00:30:43,175 --> 00:30:44,813
go put a loaded gun
to your damn head.
852
00:30:44,876 --> 00:30:45,946
There's nothing
loaded gun about this.
853
00:30:46,111 --> 00:30:47,192
What are you talking about?
854
00:30:47,212 --> 00:30:49,886
We're great together, all right?
This is just the next step.
855
00:30:49,981 --> 00:30:52,689
Off a cliff? It's not funny, man.
Like you're laughing.
856
00:30:52,784 --> 00:30:54,145
Dude, do you think
it's about to be
857
00:30:54,186 --> 00:30:55,460
free blowjobs for
the rest of your life?
858
00:30:55,487 --> 00:30:59,230
(LAUGHING) Is that what you're thinking?
That's not the case, man.
859
00:30:59,324 --> 00:31:01,167
You don't even get it.
Your life is over.
860
00:31:01,226 --> 00:31:03,866
No more going out all night.
You understand that? That's done.
861
00:31:03,962 --> 00:31:05,407
One-night stands? Over.
862
00:31:05,497 --> 00:31:07,408
Yo, do you hear that?
I hear something.
863
00:31:07,532 --> 00:31:09,409
Where's it coming from?
I don't know...
864
00:31:09,501 --> 00:31:12,710
Oh, it's coming from right here.
It's the nail hitting the damn coffin.
865
00:31:12,804 --> 00:31:15,580
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS) You don't even
get it. Your life is over, dude.
866
00:31:16,541 --> 00:31:18,680
I know she just saw me.
Hey, sweet pea.
867
00:31:19,311 --> 00:31:20,415
Excuse me?
868
00:31:20,679 --> 00:31:21,714
(CHUCKLES)
869
00:31:21,813 --> 00:31:22,985
Don't call me sweet pea.
870
00:31:23,715 --> 00:31:26,559
And also... Fuck off.
871
00:31:26,651 --> 00:31:28,653
All right, babe.
I'll just, um...
872
00:31:28,754 --> 00:31:29,755
(CLEARS THROAT)
873
00:31:31,323 --> 00:31:32,324
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
874
00:31:32,391 --> 00:31:34,098
You need to wipe
that damn smirk off your face.
875
00:31:34,192 --> 00:31:36,365
You'll be me in T-minus two months.
You hear me?
876
00:31:36,428 --> 00:31:37,702
Right on.
877
00:31:37,829 --> 00:31:39,829
Will you stop with the hands?
What's your problem?
878
00:31:39,831 --> 00:31:40,832
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
879
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:41,900
♪ What do we have? ♪
880
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:44,446
♪ Another pretty thing ♪
♪ ready for me to grab ♪
881
00:31:45,871 --> 00:31:46,906
(MUSIC STOPS)
882
00:31:47,005 --> 00:31:48,245
Hey, Joan, listen.
883
00:31:48,340 --> 00:31:50,183
I know this must suck for you...
Bite me!
884
00:31:51,276 --> 00:31:52,914
Blow me!
885
00:31:53,011 --> 00:31:55,371
See what I'm saying? I ain't
never disrespect you like that.
886
00:31:55,447 --> 00:31:56,447
Joan!
887
00:31:56,515 --> 00:31:58,756
Miss that? Miss it like
having a growth removed!
888
00:31:58,850 --> 00:31:59,851
(MUSIC RESUMES)
889
00:32:00,786 --> 00:32:03,528
♪ Well, let me think let me ♪
♪ think Ah, what should I do? ♪
890
00:32:03,588 --> 00:32:05,668
♪ So many eager young bunnies ♪
♪ that I'd like to pursue ♪
891
00:32:05,724 --> 00:32:06,794
(GLASS SHATTERING)
892
00:32:06,892 --> 00:32:07,893
(EXCLAIMS SHRILLY)
893
00:32:07,983 --> 00:32:09,503
♪ wearing out ♪
♪ the palm of my hand ♪
894
00:32:09,528 --> 00:32:10,734
♪ Bur when I play, When I play ♪
895
00:32:10,796 --> 00:32:12,571
♪ I never stay, I never stay ♪
896
00:32:12,631 --> 00:32:15,237
♪ To every girl that I meet, ♪
♪ yeah, this is what I say ♪
897
00:32:15,300 --> 00:32:16,711
I wanna talk to you, man.
898
00:32:16,765 --> 00:32:18,741
All that stuff I
was saying to you about hmm...
899
00:32:19,093 --> 00:32:21,108
about her
potentially being Alison,
900
00:32:21,206 --> 00:32:23,326
I didn't mean it, man.
I'm seeing a difference in you.
901
00:32:23,408 --> 00:32:24,944
And I feel like
it's because of her.
902
00:32:25,043 --> 00:32:28,149
I'm kind of, like, jealous.
A little bit.
903
00:32:28,246 --> 00:32:30,317
I'm really happy
for you, Danny.
904
00:32:30,427 --> 00:32:30,922
Really?
905
00:32:31,049 --> 00:32:33,400
Fuck, no! This is stupid!
906
00:32:33,885 --> 00:32:35,956
(MOCKING)
"Really? Are you really happy?"
907
00:32:36,054 --> 00:32:38,762
♪ Run run run away, ♪
♪ run away, baby ♪
908
00:32:38,824 --> 00:32:39,802
♪ Before I put ♪
♪ my spell on you I ♪
909
00:32:39,891 --> 00:32:42,851
I think it looks pretty. Pillows are
pretty. And, you know, curtains and...
910
00:32:42,894 --> 00:32:45,135
We don't really need curtains,
'cause, you know, we have shades.
911
00:32:45,230 --> 00:32:46,230
Yeah, no. Decorative.
912
00:32:46,298 --> 00:32:47,299
I don't need this many pillows.
No, we do.
913
00:32:47,399 --> 00:32:50,243
I just wanna get rid of all of them.
See? What are you doing?
914
00:32:50,302 --> 00:32:51,906
Ow! Okay. All right.
915
00:32:51,970 --> 00:32:53,108
(LAUGHING)
916
00:32:56,007 --> 00:32:57,008
Ow!
917
00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:58,814
(GRUNTS)
(BOTH LAUGHING)
918
00:33:01,613 --> 00:33:03,422
DANNY: Wow, what
have you been up to?
919
00:33:03,915 --> 00:33:05,758
Do you like it?
I mean, if not,
920
00:33:05,851 --> 00:33:07,694
the salesman said
that I can send it back.
921
00:33:07,786 --> 00:33:08,924
A dining room table?
922
00:33:08,987 --> 00:33:11,934
Yeah. Just in time
for Thanksgiving.
923
00:33:12,491 --> 00:33:13,663
- Thanksgiving?
- Yeah.
924
00:33:13,758 --> 00:33:15,431
I was thinking we
could invite some
925
00:33:15,527 --> 00:33:17,247
of our friends over
for Thanksgiving dinner.
926
00:33:17,295 --> 00:33:19,002
Since we're co-habitating now.
927
00:33:19,097 --> 00:33:21,338
- (GRUNTS)
- It's my favorite holiday.
928
00:33:21,433 --> 00:33:22,969
So, what do you think?
929
00:33:23,034 --> 00:33:24,377
Do you like it?
Be honest.
930
00:33:24,469 --> 00:33:26,005
- You did great.
- I did?
931
00:33:26,104 --> 00:33:27,139
You did really great.
932
00:33:27,272 --> 00:33:28,273
I did, didn't I?
933
00:33:30,008 --> 00:33:32,955
Hope you're hungry. I ordered
a large pizza. Pepperoni.
934
00:33:33,044 --> 00:33:34,455
Okay.
935
00:33:34,946 --> 00:33:38,553
Um, how long ago did
you order this pizza?
936
00:33:38,650 --> 00:33:39,890
Why?
937
00:33:39,985 --> 00:33:41,555
Wondering how
much time we had.
938
00:33:43,221 --> 00:33:45,497
Oh, my God.
Where is he? I'm starving.
939
00:33:45,557 --> 00:33:46,558
(STAMMERING)
(DOOR BELL BUZZES)
940
00:33:46,658 --> 00:33:48,569
There he is.
Perfect.
941
00:33:48,994 --> 00:33:51,907
I'm hungry as a motherfucker.
Let's go.
942
00:33:51,997 --> 00:33:53,806
- Looking for these?
- Yeah.
943
00:33:53,865 --> 00:33:54,866
Yeah. Yeah.
944
00:33:54,966 --> 00:33:56,536
No, you don't need them.
So I go to the door naked?
945
00:33:56,635 --> 00:33:57,670
Yeah,
go to the door like that.
946
00:33:57,802 --> 00:33:58,837
Come on,
the pizza's getting cold.
947
00:33:58,904 --> 00:34:00,747
I won't answer the door naked.
Can I get my underwear, please?
948
00:34:00,839 --> 00:34:01,909
Come on, I dare you.
949
00:34:02,007 --> 00:34:03,296
- You what?
- I dare you.
950
00:34:03,405 --> 00:34:04,679
- You dare me?
- I double dare you.
951
00:34:04,750 --> 00:34:05,886
- You double dare me?
- Yeah.
952
00:34:05,977 --> 00:34:07,320
- For real?
- Yeah.
953
00:34:07,379 --> 00:34:08,551
Shit. All right, woman.
954
00:34:08,647 --> 00:34:11,389
No, wait! Wait, wait. Let me see.
(BUZZING)
955
00:34:11,483 --> 00:34:13,209
- Come on.
- I just like looking at you.
956
00:34:13,286 --> 00:34:16,064
I appreciate it. Thank you.
Can we eat tonight?
957
00:34:16,103 --> 00:34:17,389
Okay, fine. ah
958
00:34:18,189 --> 00:34:19,532
(BUZZING)
959
00:34:20,825 --> 00:34:22,065
You throw like a girl.
960
00:34:22,160 --> 00:34:23,161
(LAUGHS)
961
00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:24,563
I'll get the plates.
962
00:34:24,696 --> 00:34:25,697
Yeah.
963
00:34:26,998 --> 00:34:27,999
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
964
00:34:28,945 --> 00:34:29,851
(DOOR CLOSED)
965
00:34:30,714 --> 00:34:31,949
(PHONE RINGING)
966
00:34:32,103 --> 00:34:33,411
What is it?
967
00:34:33,497 --> 00:34:35,875
I forgot we have the same phone.
(PHONE CONTINUES RINGING)
968
00:34:35,941 --> 00:34:37,386
Listen.
(MANS)
969
00:34:38,376 --> 00:34:40,515
She has a psycho
antenna that tells her,
970
00:34:40,612 --> 00:34:42,683
"Somewhere out there,
Danny is happy.
971
00:34:42,747 --> 00:34:46,388
"And I should swoop in and blow it
all to shit." I just ignore her.
972
00:34:46,451 --> 00:34:48,761
Yeah, but you're not ignoring it.
You're letting it ring.
973
00:34:48,853 --> 00:34:51,424
See, if I ignore it, it goes
straight to voice-mail, right?
974
00:34:51,523 --> 00:34:53,196
And then she
knows I ignored it.
975
00:34:53,258 --> 00:34:54,931
Then she sticks
a pin in a voodoo doll.
976
00:34:55,026 --> 00:34:57,905
Wait a minute. People know when
you hit the ignore button?
977
00:34:57,963 --> 00:34:59,636
Yeah.
No one ever told me that!
978
00:34:59,731 --> 00:35:01,540
You're such a fucking nerd.
979
00:35:02,133 --> 00:35:04,477
(CHUCKLES)
We don't need to make this about us.
980
00:35:04,569 --> 00:35:07,607
This is just
Alison being crazy.
981
00:35:07,706 --> 00:35:09,811
I mean, we moved in together
after a 10-minute conversation.
982
00:35:09,908 --> 00:35:11,469
You know what?
We gave it our best shot.
983
00:35:11,543 --> 00:35:12,988
You're right.
We should just call U-Haul...
984
00:35:13,078 --> 00:35:14,614
You never said
you wanted this.
985
00:35:14,713 --> 00:35:17,626
I just spent a week rearranging
my life and moving you in.
986
00:35:17,716 --> 00:35:18,820
Does that not say
I want to do this?
987
00:35:18,917 --> 00:35:21,090
Are we fighting right now?
Is this our first fight?
988
00:35:21,152 --> 00:35:23,098
Yeah, and it's like we're coming
out of the gate pretty strong.
989
00:35:23,154 --> 00:35:24,599
I need to hear you say it.
990
00:35:25,423 --> 00:35:26,595
I wanna do this.
991
00:35:26,658 --> 00:35:27,830
Why?
992
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:31,166
I want, like, a home.
993
00:35:31,262 --> 00:35:35,768
I haven't had one in a long
time, and you being here
994
00:35:36,001 --> 00:35:37,344
makes this place a home.
995
00:35:38,169 --> 00:35:39,341
That's so amazing.
996
00:35:39,437 --> 00:35:40,507
Yeah?
997
00:35:41,673 --> 00:35:43,152
Can we always be
honest like this?
998
00:35:43,241 --> 00:35:44,241
Absolutely.
999
00:35:44,275 --> 00:35:46,482
What level of
honesty would you prefer?
1000
00:35:46,578 --> 00:35:49,991
"I don't like it when you
play Rihanna music" honest?
1001
00:35:50,081 --> 00:35:51,924
Or "I imagine a threesome with you
and Rihanna" honest?
1002
00:35:52,017 --> 00:35:53,826
I'm...I'm
I'm good either way.
1003
00:35:53,918 --> 00:35:55,319
(LAUGHS)
1004
00:35:56,287 --> 00:35:57,527
God, I love you.
1005
00:35:57,622 --> 00:35:58,930
I love you, too.
1006
00:36:04,429 --> 00:36:05,931
I'm gonna get those plates.
1007
00:36:08,466 --> 00:36:09,467
(SIGHS)
1008
00:36:11,436 --> 00:36:13,973
BERNIE: No, no, no, Danny!
1009
00:36:14,039 --> 00:36:15,313
Who said it first?
1010
00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:16,680
She did. But I don't
think she meant to.
1011
00:36:16,775 --> 00:36:18,379
Women approach that phrase
with a tactical strategy
1012
00:36:18,476 --> 00:36:20,683
normally reserved for
an anti-terrorist strike team.
1013
00:36:20,812 --> 00:36:22,655
I think it was just an accident.
This was no accident.
1014
00:36:22,714 --> 00:36:24,853
That was an ambush.
This was definitely...
1015
00:36:24,949 --> 00:36:26,326
The worst thing you could do.
1016
00:36:26,384 --> 00:36:27,624
It's not like I planned it.
It just came out.
1017
00:36:27,719 --> 00:36:28,857
Well, it's a disaster.
1018
00:36:28,953 --> 00:36:30,899
Let's just go to his place,
move your stuff out,
1019
00:36:30,989 --> 00:36:33,128
start a new life in
another state. Disappear.
1020
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:35,034
Join Witness Protection
because you're fucked.
1021
00:36:35,126 --> 00:36:36,332
Is it that bad to be
the first one to say it?
1022
00:36:36,394 --> 00:36:38,237
Yes, it is! And you know why?
1023
00:36:38,329 --> 00:36:39,637
Why?
1024
00:36:39,731 --> 00:36:41,005
Because in every
relationship everywhere,
1025
00:36:41,066 --> 00:36:44,013
there is a person who cares
more than the other person.
1026
00:36:44,069 --> 00:36:45,549
And whoever says
"I love you" first...
1027
00:36:45,637 --> 00:36:46,980
Cares more!
1028
00:36:47,172 --> 00:36:49,652
That other person's gotta
match that level of caring.
1029
00:36:49,741 --> 00:36:53,211
Which is impossible because
she will always care more!
1030
00:36:53,311 --> 00:36:57,020
Now you're saying things like, "I
don't know if I feel the same way."
1031
00:36:57,082 --> 00:36:58,220
So, you're saying
1032
00:36:58,316 --> 00:36:59,716
we should have
just counted to three
1033
00:36:59,718 --> 00:37:00,992
and maybe said it
at the same time?
1034
00:37:01,052 --> 00:37:02,053
That's not what
I'm saying, Ike.
1035
00:37:02,153 --> 00:37:05,327
When you were with Alison,
who said "I love you“ first?"
1036
00:37:05,657 --> 00:37:06,897
Oh, shit.
1037
00:37:06,991 --> 00:37:07,979
Exacto-mundo, man.
1038
00:37:08,034 --> 00:37:09,679
Hey, Daddio,
we didn't order these.
1039
00:37:09,834 --> 00:37:10,272
They did.
1040
00:37:10,328 --> 00:37:11,329
Them bitches over there?
1041
00:37:11,396 --> 00:37:12,500
BARTENDERI Yep.
1042
00:37:12,564 --> 00:37:14,271
BOTH: I love Halloween.
1043
00:37:14,365 --> 00:37:16,003
I hate Halloween.
1044
00:37:16,334 --> 00:37:17,745
Wait, who are you, by the way?
1045
00:37:17,836 --> 00:37:19,782
What's your costume?
Are you Rod Stewart in drag?
1046
00:37:20,004 --> 00:37:21,608
I'm Tina Turner.
Oh.
1047
00:37:21,706 --> 00:37:23,617
It makes more sense
when I stand next to Danny.
1048
00:37:23,708 --> 00:37:26,416
Right, like that's not a
metaphor for something.
1049
00:37:26,511 --> 00:37:29,583
There they are. My only regret is that
he didn't let me clean his teeth.
1050
00:37:29,681 --> 00:37:33,254
I bet that fuckers like the Sistine
Chapel of hardened plaque.
1051
00:37:33,351 --> 00:37:34,728
Divide and conquer?
1052
00:37:34,786 --> 00:37:36,197
Let's do it.
1053
00:37:36,531 --> 00:37:38,531
BERNIE: All right, so let
me break it down for you.
1054
00:37:38,556 --> 00:37:40,263
The slutty angel,
she likes anal.
1055
00:37:40,358 --> 00:37:42,065
All right?
And the slutty nurse, she likes
1056
00:37:42,193 --> 00:37:43,866
to say "Daddy"
while she's having sex.
1057
00:37:43,928 --> 00:37:45,100
That's her thing.
No shit.
1058
00:37:45,196 --> 00:37:48,439
And the slutty nun, Oh, it's
on with the slutty nun.
1059
00:37:48,533 --> 00:37:49,637
(CHUCKLING)
1060
00:37:49,734 --> 00:37:53,113
Well, here's to another night of sexual
perversity in Los Angeles, baby.
1061
00:37:53,204 --> 00:37:54,274
Wait.
No, I'm not gonna do that.
1062
00:37:54,405 --> 00:37:55,475
I'm not toasting
with you to that.
1063
00:37:55,573 --> 00:37:56,950
That's not your world no more.
1064
00:37:57,041 --> 00:37:59,419
You've been banished into the world
of couples' costumes, Danny.
1065
00:37:59,477 --> 00:38:00,888
That's right.
I don't know anything
1066
00:38:01,045 --> 00:38:02,422
that's more
emasculating than that.
1067
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:04,880
Who the hell are you supposed to be?
I mean, aren't you cold?
1068
00:38:04,883 --> 00:38:07,830
I am Channing Tatum.
Channing Tatum never gets cold.
1069
00:38:07,919 --> 00:38:09,125
Church.
1070
00:38:09,220 --> 00:38:10,221
(GRUNTS)
1071
00:38:10,288 --> 00:38:11,289
Ike, baby.
1072
00:38:11,422 --> 00:38:12,423
Hey, how's it going?
1073
00:38:12,490 --> 00:38:15,130
I gotta meet a client in the
morning, so I can't stay too long.
1074
00:38:15,226 --> 00:38:18,002
Ah, baby. It's a holiday.
You gotta work tomorrow?
1075
00:38:18,096 --> 00:38:20,838
It's a kids' holiday and
grown-ups have to work tomorrow.
1076
00:38:20,932 --> 00:38:22,172
That's a great
attitude to have.
1077
00:38:22,233 --> 00:38:23,974
Why don't you just tell him
that there's no Santa Claus?
1078
00:38:24,068 --> 00:38:25,570
Aren't you Jewish?
1079
00:38:26,070 --> 00:38:27,913
JOAN: Who are you waving
those singles at?
1080
00:38:27,972 --> 00:38:28,973
Mmm-mm.
1081
00:38:29,073 --> 00:38:31,019
There ain't no
magic in that mini-Mike.
1082
00:38:31,109 --> 00:38:32,110
You see what
I'm talking about?
1083
00:38:32,243 --> 00:38:33,278
Take your little drink.
1084
00:38:33,344 --> 00:38:35,017
Get on the way.
Uh-huh. I have this.
1085
00:38:35,180 --> 00:38:36,523
What is she... Joan!
1086
00:38:36,614 --> 00:38:38,457
Uh-uh. You better not...
Hey, Joan!
1087
00:38:39,517 --> 00:38:40,689
What did you just
say to them?
1088
00:38:40,785 --> 00:38:42,856
Nothing. I just told
them you gave me herpes.
1089
00:38:42,954 --> 00:38:45,696
That I have... I don't
have fucking herpes, Joan!
1090
00:38:45,790 --> 00:38:46,791
(MUSIC STOPS)
1091
00:38:47,358 --> 00:38:49,201
Uh-oh.
(CHUCKLES)
1092
00:38:49,294 --> 00:38:50,967
Promise me we'll
never end up like them.
1093
00:38:51,029 --> 00:38:54,203
Ali's fair, Bitchko. What are
you gonna do, cry about it?
1094
00:38:54,303 --> 00:38:56,803
Yo, you are sick.
You're gone, Joan.
1095
00:38:56,874 --> 00:38:59,180
If you didn't have a pussy, there
would be a bounty on your head!
1096
00:38:59,270 --> 00:39:00,305
Can we go home now?
1097
00:39:00,438 --> 00:39:01,473
Come on,
little mama, let's split.
1098
00:39:01,539 --> 00:39:04,349
JOAN: You are a
psychopathic social misfit
1099
00:39:04,442 --> 00:39:07,980
who's clearly in the middle
of a deep homosexual panic.
1100
00:39:08,546 --> 00:39:11,459
Oh, if I'm gay, it's only because
after fucking you for three months,
1101
00:39:11,516 --> 00:39:13,655
that seems like
the next logical step to lake!
1102
00:39:13,785 --> 00:39:17,198
I would rather chase another man's
ass than fuck you again, Joan!
1103
00:39:17,288 --> 00:39:18,733
Homosexual panic!
Homosexual panic!
1104
00:39:18,857 --> 00:39:20,302
Oh, that's a panic?
1105
00:39:20,358 --> 00:39:21,530
That's a panic? This is a panic!
(GASPS)
1106
00:39:21,626 --> 00:39:22,866
You got no idea
what I'll do to you.
1107
00:39:22,961 --> 00:39:24,167
You better make it count,
motherfucker,
1108
00:39:24,295 --> 00:39:25,616
'cause you won't
get a second one!
1109
00:39:25,630 --> 00:39:26,631
You make me mad!
1110
00:39:26,731 --> 00:39:29,234
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1111
00:39:29,467 --> 00:39:30,844
I hate your guts!
1112
00:39:31,002 --> 00:39:32,379
Get away. You get away!
1113
00:39:32,470 --> 00:39:34,211
You better lose my number.
You lose it!
1114
00:39:34,305 --> 00:39:37,047
I'm gonna lose the memory
that you ever lived!
1115
00:39:37,208 --> 00:39:38,209
(SCREAMS)
1116
00:39:39,410 --> 00:39:40,411
(GROANS)
1117
00:39:40,812 --> 00:39:42,189
Security!
1118
00:39:42,313 --> 00:39:43,314
Security!
1119
00:39:43,548 --> 00:39:44,652
BERNIE: Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
1120
00:39:45,516 --> 00:39:48,929
Hey, dude, when I tell you
last night got crazy...
1121
00:39:49,487 --> 00:39:51,160
You remember
the slutty chicks, right?
1122
00:39:51,222 --> 00:39:54,203
We start doing shots. We do, like,
fucking 16 shots, back to back.
1123
00:39:55,059 --> 00:39:57,164
You should have
stayed instead of leaving
1124
00:39:57,262 --> 00:39:59,242
like a little
whipped punk bitch.
1125
00:39:59,364 --> 00:40:01,344
Yeah, I'm super jealous of you right now.
Tell you something,
1126
00:40:01,399 --> 00:40:02,844
if you're gonna scream at me,
don't talk to me.
1127
00:40:02,901 --> 00:40:04,437
I'm talking in a totally
normal voice right now.
1128
00:40:04,535 --> 00:40:06,242
You know, I don't need to party.
Okay.
1129
00:40:06,337 --> 00:40:07,748
I can have a perfectly
enjoyable night at home, man.
1130
00:40:07,839 --> 00:40:10,115
That's what you're gonna do, you're
gonna try to sell me on that shit?
1131
00:40:10,208 --> 00:40:11,209
Keep talking, sell me on it.
1132
00:40:11,276 --> 00:40:12,346
Well, Debbie
has this thing with...
1133
00:40:12,510 --> 00:40:13,511
Why don't you just
shut the hell up?
1134
00:40:13,578 --> 00:40:15,580
I don't wanna hear it,
give a shit about that!
1135
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:17,887
You and your life at home with Debbie.
I got a damn hangover!
1136
00:40:17,949 --> 00:40:20,088
Feel like a bunch of bees
stinging me in my face!
1137
00:40:20,184 --> 00:40:21,184
(FEEDBACK SQUEALING)
1138
00:40:21,219 --> 00:40:24,564
KELLER: Daniel Martin, please
come to my office. Daniel Martin.
1139
00:40:24,622 --> 00:40:26,295
Am I a lost kid at
Chuck E. Cheese?
1140
00:40:26,424 --> 00:40:28,062
Why does he
insist on using that?
1141
00:40:29,294 --> 00:40:30,364
Hey, buddy.
1142
00:40:30,428 --> 00:40:33,705
Uh, this is Mr. Savelson,
Mr. Greenberg from corporate.
1143
00:40:33,765 --> 00:40:36,075
Uh, they're here to talk
to you about your accounts.
1144
00:40:36,134 --> 00:40:39,308
Uh, specifically Casey's
and how he hasn't, um,
1145
00:40:39,404 --> 00:40:40,576
paid us.
(CHUCKLES)
1146
00:40:41,940 --> 00:40:44,386
That's it. Should be one,
two, buckle my shoe.
1147
00:40:44,442 --> 00:40:46,444
So let's huddle up.
We'll have a nice little chat.
1148
00:40:46,544 --> 00:40:47,921
Mano-a-mano...
1149
00:40:48,379 --> 00:40:49,414
A-mano-a-mano.
1150
00:40:49,580 --> 00:40:51,457
There's four
people in this scenario.
1151
00:40:51,549 --> 00:40:52,892
CASEY: They can't cut me off.
1152
00:40:52,951 --> 00:40:55,056
I've been giving
them business for years.
1153
00:40:55,119 --> 00:40:56,826
I always pay eventually.
1154
00:40:56,921 --> 00:40:58,081
There's no more "eventually."
1155
00:40:58,222 --> 00:40:59,292
I wanna talk to them.
1156
00:40:59,390 --> 00:41:01,310
They can't do this to people.
There is no "They"!
1157
00:41:01,326 --> 00:41:04,933
It's a gigantic company. I don't
even know who my boss' boss is.
1158
00:41:06,230 --> 00:41:08,073
They don't care about you
1159
00:41:09,100 --> 00:41:10,272
or your bar.
1160
00:41:10,668 --> 00:41:11,669
Ah.
1161
00:41:15,573 --> 00:41:17,519
What about you, Danny?
1162
00:41:19,477 --> 00:41:20,683
Do you care?
1163
00:41:33,458 --> 00:41:35,096
(SPORTSCAST PLAYING)
1164
00:41:38,296 --> 00:41:39,434
Hey.
1165
00:41:39,597 --> 00:41:40,632
Hey.
1166
00:41:41,432 --> 00:41:42,433
(CLEARS THROAT)
1167
00:41:42,500 --> 00:41:43,940
Don't forget about
the thing tonight.
1168
00:41:44,135 --> 00:41:45,443
Ah, shit, Debbie.
1169
00:41:45,503 --> 00:41:47,949
Come on, you said you'd go. I want
you to meet the people I work with.
1170
00:41:48,006 --> 00:41:49,007
Fine.
1171
00:41:51,009 --> 00:41:52,386
But I'm inviting Bernie!
1172
00:41:54,045 --> 00:41:56,150
Fine. Then I'm inviting Joan.
1173
00:41:56,647 --> 00:41:57,990
Fine.
Fine.
1174
00:41:58,049 --> 00:41:59,494
Fine.
Fine!
1175
00:41:59,550 --> 00:42:01,029
Fine.
Fine.
1176
00:42:05,890 --> 00:42:07,392
(MOUTHING)
I heard that!
1177
00:42:08,583 --> 00:42:10,103
DANNY: Hey, man.
Thanks for showing up.
1178
00:42:10,128 --> 00:42:11,505
BERNIE: Anytime.
1179
00:42:11,707 --> 00:42:14,507
So, dude, what are you, like, auditioning
for her co-workers right now?
1180
00:42:14,532 --> 00:42:15,875
You know, I'm supporting her.
1181
00:42:15,967 --> 00:42:17,537
Financially, is that
what you're talking about?
1182
00:42:17,635 --> 00:42:21,139
Actually, no. I mean, she might
make more money than me.
1183
00:42:21,205 --> 00:42:22,912
She might make
more money than you?
1184
00:42:23,007 --> 00:42:24,008
What the hell
are you talking...
1185
00:42:24,075 --> 00:42:25,645
You know damn well
she makes more money than you.
1186
00:42:25,710 --> 00:42:27,383
Stop it, Danny. You know what
you are in this picture?
1187
00:42:27,478 --> 00:42:29,981
Okay, let's say her
life is like a bike, right?
1188
00:42:30,481 --> 00:42:33,724
Dude, you wouldn't be the tire,
you wouldn't be the handlebar.
1189
00:42:33,818 --> 00:42:35,354
You wouldn't even
be the damn seat.
1190
00:42:35,486 --> 00:42:36,988
Danny,
you know what you would be?
1191
00:42:37,055 --> 00:42:39,365
You would be the little bell
on the front of the bike.
1192
00:42:39,424 --> 00:42:40,494
You know,
the bell that people ring
1193
00:42:40,658 --> 00:42:41,728
to let people
know they're coming.
1194
00:42:41,826 --> 00:42:42,827
(IMITATES BELL RINGING)
Yeah.
1195
00:42:42,894 --> 00:42:44,999
"Here I come.
Look how perfect my life is."
1196
00:42:45,163 --> 00:42:46,335
(IMITATES BELL RINGING)
1197
00:42:46,397 --> 00:42:48,604
That's what you would be.
A fucking bell.
1198
00:42:48,699 --> 00:42:52,272
Oh, my God. Hello.
Sweetie, I'm talk... Okay.
1199
00:42:53,337 --> 00:42:54,907
Lesbian.
I don't think so.
1200
00:42:55,006 --> 00:42:56,747
I can't stand coming
to stuff like this.
1201
00:42:56,841 --> 00:42:59,412
Everybody walking around with
their nose all up in the air.
1202
00:42:59,510 --> 00:43:01,183
Bunch of rich
people with attitudes.
1203
00:43:01,245 --> 00:43:02,622
You understand these
are the type of people
1204
00:43:02,747 --> 00:43:04,090
that Debbie's
hanging around with.
1205
00:43:04,182 --> 00:43:05,388
That means these
are the type of people
1206
00:43:05,446 --> 00:43:06,726
that you have to
hang around with
1207
00:43:06,751 --> 00:43:09,097
in order lo continue to be that
little bell on her bike, man.
1208
00:43:09,401 --> 00:43:11,278
Ring, ring. Food for thought.
1209
00:43:12,223 --> 00:43:13,395
Hey, is that Joan
right there?
1210
00:43:14,358 --> 00:43:15,393
DANNY: Ooh!
1211
00:43:15,460 --> 00:43:18,566
Yeah, I'm gonna leave
you to it. Ring, ring.
1212
00:43:21,466 --> 00:43:22,467
(SIGHS)
1213
00:43:23,701 --> 00:43:24,941
You look good, Joan.
(SIGHS)
1214
00:43:25,036 --> 00:43:26,709
By good, I do mean tremendous.
1215
00:43:27,538 --> 00:43:28,538
Listen, I was thinking...
1216
00:43:28,573 --> 00:43:29,574
You were thinking?
1217
00:43:29,640 --> 00:43:31,142
You shouldn't do that,
you'll hurt yourself.
1218
00:43:31,242 --> 00:43:33,552
That's what I miss.
So damn feisty, Joan.
1219
00:43:33,611 --> 00:43:34,919
Why don't you go
bother some other girl?
1220
00:43:34,979 --> 00:43:38,426
Maybe I don't want to bother some
other girl. Maybe I want some feisty.
1221
00:43:38,483 --> 00:43:39,484
Here you go.
1222
00:43:40,218 --> 00:43:41,219
Uh...
1223
00:43:41,819 --> 00:43:42,820
Hmm.
1224
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:46,129
A rum and coke. Light ice, though.
I don't like a lot of ice.
1225
00:43:46,224 --> 00:43:47,225
(CHUCKLES)
1226
00:43:47,325 --> 00:43:48,998
Bernie, this is, um...
1227
00:43:50,161 --> 00:43:52,107
Oh, wow.
I'm sorry.
1228
00:43:52,163 --> 00:43:54,268
Your name is escaping me
because I'm distracted
1229
00:43:54,332 --> 00:43:56,334
by how straight and
white your teeth are.
1230
00:43:56,434 --> 00:43:58,471
Derek, like Jeter.
1231
00:43:58,569 --> 00:43:59,809
Right.
Yeah.
1232
00:43:59,904 --> 00:44:01,645
Derek, this is Bernie,
1233
00:44:01,739 --> 00:44:02,740
like Madoff.
1234
00:44:02,807 --> 00:44:03,808
(CHUCKLES)
1235
00:44:03,908 --> 00:44:06,479
He has gingivitis as a result
of not flossing enough.
1236
00:44:07,411 --> 00:44:08,411
Hey, what's up, man?
1237
00:44:08,446 --> 00:44:09,447
The hell am I
supposed to do with that?
1238
00:44:09,514 --> 00:44:11,357
Well, normal people shake it.
I'm not normal.
1239
00:44:11,449 --> 00:44:13,156
Bernie's gonna go to
a shitty dive bar now
1240
00:44:13,284 --> 00:44:15,004
and pick up some chick
with low self-esteem.
1241
00:44:16,354 --> 00:44:18,595
Nah, I'm gonna go home.
1242
00:44:18,656 --> 00:44:21,500
The only chick with low
self-esteem that I wanted tonight
1243
00:44:22,260 --> 00:44:23,500
is you.
1244
00:44:28,432 --> 00:44:31,276
(R&B PLAYING FAINTLY)
1245
00:44:31,335 --> 00:44:32,473
Look, I'm telling you.
1246
00:44:32,537 --> 00:44:35,984
You wanna clear 400 K at the end of
the year without lifting a finger?
1247
00:44:36,040 --> 00:44:38,281
You invest. Passive income.
1248
00:44:38,342 --> 00:44:39,616
That's how you're
gonna pay your taxes.
1249
00:44:39,677 --> 00:44:40,781
Danny, what do you do?
1250
00:44:40,845 --> 00:44:43,451
Honey. He wants
to know what you do.
1251
00:44:44,849 --> 00:44:46,328
Restaurant supply.
Interesting.
1252
00:44:46,384 --> 00:44:48,295
In what aspect?
I work.
1253
00:44:48,986 --> 00:44:50,056
Active income.
1254
00:44:50,154 --> 00:44:51,674
It's kind of
a 'cause and effect thing.
1255
00:44:51,689 --> 00:44:53,794
You actually work, someone
actually pays you for the work.
1256
00:44:53,858 --> 00:44:56,464
It's an experimental thing
a few companies are trying.
1257
00:44:57,695 --> 00:44:58,969
Danny's a salesman.
I can see.
1258
00:44:59,030 --> 00:45:01,738
I mean, he's really
selling me on something.
1259
00:45:02,476 --> 00:45:03,676
So how did you
and Debbie meet?
1260
00:45:03,701 --> 00:45:04,702
We're cousins.
1261
00:45:05,069 --> 00:45:06,571
Danny.
(CHUCKLES)
1262
00:45:06,671 --> 00:45:08,742
Hey, I'm just trying
to make conversation.
1263
00:45:08,906 --> 00:45:11,477
Okay, chief.
Don't let me stop you.
1264
00:45:11,642 --> 00:45:13,644
Excuse me for a second.
1265
00:45:15,813 --> 00:45:16,814
(BELL DINGS)
1266
00:45:18,749 --> 00:45:20,422
What the hell was that?
1267
00:45:20,651 --> 00:45:21,755
That was Steven,
1268
00:45:21,852 --> 00:45:24,765
wiping his dick with money that
could save people's businesses.
1269
00:45:24,855 --> 00:45:25,890
That's what that was.
1270
00:45:25,990 --> 00:45:27,591
Why are you so angry?
Who said I'm angry?
1271
00:45:27,658 --> 00:45:28,779
What do you call this? Calm?
1272
00:45:28,926 --> 00:45:31,031
My boss is not why
you're mad, Danny.
1273
00:45:31,095 --> 00:45:32,896
You're scared about something.
I'm not scared.
1274
00:45:32,930 --> 00:45:34,409
Talk to me!
1275
00:45:38,502 --> 00:45:40,709
I hate my job.
1276
00:45:43,040 --> 00:45:48,513
It means I have to do things that I
know aren't right, and I hate it.
1277
00:45:48,579 --> 00:45:50,024
Then quit.
I can't.
1278
00:45:50,181 --> 00:45:51,751
Why not?
Because I have you now.
1279
00:45:51,849 --> 00:45:53,760
I can't do that.
1280
00:45:53,851 --> 00:45:56,855
I appreciate you wanting me to
follow my dream, baby, but it's just
1281
00:45:57,221 --> 00:45:58,256
unrealistic.
1282
00:45:58,356 --> 00:45:59,926
Baby, if you're holding on
to this job because of me,
1283
00:46:00,024 --> 00:46:01,264
you're doing it for
the wrong reasons.
1284
00:46:01,359 --> 00:46:02,599
You say that,
but you don't mean it.
1285
00:46:02,727 --> 00:46:03,967
How do you know what I mean?
1286
00:46:04,061 --> 00:46:06,439
I know it because you're a
well put together person
1287
00:46:06,530 --> 00:46:08,305
and you want me to
be a part of all that.
1288
00:46:08,399 --> 00:46:10,037
This shit isn't pretty,
all right!
1289
00:46:10,101 --> 00:46:12,138
You will run when I
cannot be what you want!
1290
00:46:12,236 --> 00:46:13,715
I'm not Alison!
1291
00:46:19,377 --> 00:46:20,378
(SIGHS)
1292
00:46:23,881 --> 00:46:24,882
(MUTTERS)
1293
00:46:36,060 --> 00:46:38,180
- (KNOCKING)
- KELLER: Hey, buddy, You wanna sit down?
1294
00:46:39,263 --> 00:46:40,298
(CLEARS THROAT)
1295
00:46:40,398 --> 00:46:42,199
You know, I'm not really good
at communicating
1296
00:46:42,233 --> 00:46:44,144
except with my Japanese love-doll.
(CHUCKLES)
1297
00:46:44,235 --> 00:46:45,908
There goes my
sense of humor again.
1298
00:46:45,970 --> 00:46:47,643
Right, right.
What's up, Keller?
1299
00:46:47,738 --> 00:46:51,015
(CLEARS THROAT)
So since...
1300
00:46:51,108 --> 00:46:53,110
Two weeks after our
meeting with corporate,
1301
00:46:53,177 --> 00:46:54,815
a delivery went
out to Casey's.
1302
00:46:54,912 --> 00:46:56,858
It's probably a computer
glitch or something.
1303
00:46:56,947 --> 00:46:59,359
Nope. No, I actually
authorized that delivery.
1304
00:47:00,117 --> 00:47:01,687
Right. Okay.
1305
00:47:02,620 --> 00:47:06,864
Well, since you violated and
misappropriated company materials,
1306
00:47:06,957 --> 00:47:09,437
I'm gonna have to...
1307
00:47:10,995 --> 00:47:13,134
You know...
1308
00:47:13,197 --> 00:47:16,269
Because you... You leave
me no recourse, Danny.
1309
00:47:17,001 --> 00:47:18,002
(COUGHS)
1310
00:47:19,337 --> 00:47:20,338
Danny...
1311
00:47:20,438 --> 00:47:22,884
I'll tell you what.
I'll make it easier on you.
1312
00:47:22,973 --> 00:47:24,475
Come on, Danny!
1313
00:47:24,542 --> 00:47:26,818
Danny, don't be mad, man.
What're you doing? Are you mad at me?
1314
00:47:26,877 --> 00:47:28,288
Where you going, man?
1315
00:47:28,346 --> 00:47:30,485
I'm walking out. That's what
people do when they quit.
1316
00:47:30,548 --> 00:47:31,720
You can't quit.
1317
00:47:31,849 --> 00:47:33,055
Oh, yeah? Watch me.
1318
00:47:33,193 --> 00:47:34,593
Hey, can you hold
that for a second?
1319
00:47:34,618 --> 00:47:35,619
Yeah.
1320
00:47:38,956 --> 00:47:40,867
Oh, shit!
1321
00:47:40,958 --> 00:47:41,958
What?
1322
00:47:42,026 --> 00:47:43,562
- Thanks, man. I'll see you later?
- Yeah.
1323
00:47:43,661 --> 00:47:44,696
All right, cool.
1324
00:47:44,795 --> 00:47:46,195
You can't quit
because you're fired!
1325
00:47:46,197 --> 00:47:47,540
Go fuck yourself.
1326
00:47:48,833 --> 00:47:50,744
(SLOW CLAPPING)
1327
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:55,281
You're still on for
the company picnic, right?
1328
00:47:55,306 --> 00:47:57,308
Sure am. Yep.
1329
00:48:00,244 --> 00:48:02,690
DANNY: There you are.
Baby, you were right.
1330
00:48:02,747 --> 00:48:04,749
Just screw that place. I quit.
1331
00:48:04,849 --> 00:48:06,385
Good for you.
1332
00:48:06,484 --> 00:48:07,986
What's going on?
1333
00:48:09,156 --> 00:48:10,396
I thought we
were being careful.
1334
00:48:10,421 --> 00:48:11,422
We are.
1335
00:48:11,489 --> 00:48:13,230
I just switched birth control...
Wait.
1336
00:48:13,324 --> 00:48:14,997
We haven't had sex in forever.
1337
00:48:15,059 --> 00:48:16,163
We had sex three days ago.
1338
00:48:16,260 --> 00:48:17,341
Used to have sex every day.
1339
00:48:17,395 --> 00:48:18,915
It takes two people
to have sex, Danny.
1340
00:48:18,929 --> 00:48:20,203
What is that
supposed to mean, Debbie?
1341
00:48:20,331 --> 00:48:21,605
Nothing. I'm not pregnant.
1342
00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:24,070
(SUMS)
Thank God.
1343
00:48:24,168 --> 00:48:25,169
Wow.
1344
00:48:25,603 --> 00:48:28,345
Wait, are you disappointed?
1345
00:48:29,340 --> 00:48:31,752
Look, Debbie. I just
quit my job. I'm not...
1346
00:48:31,842 --> 00:48:33,014
I'm relieved. I'm relieved.
1347
00:48:33,411 --> 00:48:34,549
Yeah?
1348
00:48:35,246 --> 00:48:36,350
Good.
1349
00:48:39,350 --> 00:48:40,351
(EXHALES)
1350
00:48:43,296 --> 00:48:45,097
So now we got two reasons
to celebrate, right?
1351
00:48:45,122 --> 00:48:46,294
Yeah. (LAUGHS)
Mmm.
1352
00:48:46,690 --> 00:48:47,691
Yep.
1353
00:48:47,758 --> 00:48:49,203
You want a beer?
1354
00:48:49,894 --> 00:48:50,895
Love one.
1355
00:48:51,629 --> 00:48:54,200
DEBBIE: Cranberry sauce,
onions for stuffing.
1356
00:48:55,032 --> 00:48:59,538
Oh, is Bernie coming tomorrow?
Because I should warn Joan.
1357
00:49:00,371 --> 00:49:02,612
I'll ask.
I'm gonna see him tonight.
1358
00:49:02,706 --> 00:49:04,481
You going out tonight?
1359
00:49:04,575 --> 00:49:05,952
Yeah, it's Trent's birthday,
we always go out.
1360
00:49:06,043 --> 00:49:07,044
Oh.
1361
00:49:07,111 --> 00:49:08,283
I didn't tell you that?
1362
00:49:08,379 --> 00:49:09,585
No, no. It's fine.
1363
00:49:09,647 --> 00:49:12,423
It's a tradition, you know?
I mean, we do it every year.
1364
00:49:12,483 --> 00:49:15,396
We can still see our friends
outside of each other, right?
1365
00:49:15,453 --> 00:49:16,898
(LAUGHS)
Of course.
1366
00:49:17,788 --> 00:49:19,062
Why are you...
1367
00:49:19,390 --> 00:49:21,301
Are we arguing?
1368
00:49:21,392 --> 00:49:22,928
No, we're talking.
1369
00:49:22,993 --> 00:49:24,472
You don't want me to go out?
1370
00:49:24,562 --> 00:49:26,132
No, do what you wanna do.
1371
00:49:26,230 --> 00:49:28,801
You don't want me to go out
the night before Thanksgiving.
1372
00:49:28,899 --> 00:49:31,277
No, baby.
I'm just confused. Okay?
1373
00:49:31,335 --> 00:49:34,612
You said that we were gonna make
Thanksgiving dinner together.
1374
00:49:34,672 --> 00:49:35,912
It's my favorite holiday.
1375
00:49:35,973 --> 00:49:36,974
This is not a problem at all.
1376
00:49:37,074 --> 00:49:38,849
Tomorrow morning
we will wake up,
1377
00:49:38,976 --> 00:49:40,785
we will whip up
something special.
1378
00:49:40,845 --> 00:49:42,449
I'll make sweet potato pie.
(GASPS)
1379
00:49:42,513 --> 00:49:44,584
Okay? It's still gonna be
your favorite holiday.
1380
00:49:44,648 --> 00:49:46,286
We're gonna do it together.
1381
00:49:46,350 --> 00:49:47,852
Okay?
Thank you.
1382
00:49:47,952 --> 00:49:49,795
Are we making up?
We weren't fighting.
1383
00:49:49,854 --> 00:49:51,595
Can we make up anyway?
Lay it on me.
1384
00:49:53,090 --> 00:49:54,592
(LAUGHING)
1385
00:49:59,797 --> 00:50:01,140
(DOG BARKING)
1386
00:50:01,198 --> 00:50:04,702
Look. Aw!
Look at all the doggies!
1387
00:50:05,436 --> 00:50:06,437
(GASPS)
Can I hold it?
1388
00:50:06,504 --> 00:50:07,505
Of course.
1389
00:50:07,605 --> 00:50:09,016
They need good homes.
1390
00:50:09,106 --> 00:50:10,449
On! (LAUGHS)
1391
00:50:10,508 --> 00:50:12,283
Ah, baby, isn't he cute?
1392
00:50:12,343 --> 00:50:15,688
Yeah, he's adorable. Look at you.
You're a little Chewbacca.
1393
00:50:15,779 --> 00:50:18,726
This is our dog.
You wanna be our doggie?
1394
00:50:18,816 --> 00:50:20,523
Our dog?
Wouldn't it be great?
1395
00:50:20,618 --> 00:50:22,564
Walks in the park, snuggles.
1396
00:50:22,653 --> 00:50:25,691
Baby, you know, they chew stuff
up, they poop on floors.
1397
00:50:25,789 --> 00:50:28,827
You're just gonna let him kiss you
in the mouth, huh? Just, wow.
1398
00:50:28,893 --> 00:50:31,339
It's a lot of
responsibility, baby.
1399
00:50:32,162 --> 00:50:33,664
Thank you.
1400
00:50:33,731 --> 00:50:34,835
What's wrong?
1401
00:50:34,899 --> 00:50:36,207
Nothing.
What happened?
1402
00:50:36,300 --> 00:50:37,711
Nothing.
Come on. Just tell me.
1403
00:50:37,801 --> 00:50:40,145
No, I just feel ready,
but you don't, so we aren't.
1404
00:50:40,204 --> 00:50:41,512
It's cute.
It's cool.
1405
00:50:41,572 --> 00:50:42,573
Cool.
1406
00:50:44,008 --> 00:50:45,487
Now we are arguing.
1407
00:50:47,912 --> 00:50:49,050
Hey, should we get a dog?
1408
00:50:49,146 --> 00:50:50,523
You talking about
collectively, as a group?
1409
00:50:50,581 --> 00:50:51,889
I'm allergic.
I like Rottweilers.
1410
00:50:51,956 --> 00:50:53,497
I'm not getting a dog.
'Cause You wouldn't
1411
00:50:53,523 --> 00:50:54,895
take care of it,
Trent, you're irresponsible.
1412
00:50:54,985 --> 00:50:56,726
What do you mean I'm not gonna
take care of it? I love dogs.
1413
00:50:56,820 --> 00:50:59,232
I'd be stuck cleaning up shit.
And I'm not cleaning up dog shit.
1414
00:50:59,323 --> 00:51:02,270
Debbie, the woman I live with,
is interested in procuring
1415
00:51:02,359 --> 00:51:04,032
an animal for us
to domesticate.
1416
00:51:04,094 --> 00:51:06,335
Isn't she too busy
domesticating you?
1417
00:51:06,397 --> 00:51:07,398
- (GRUNTS)
- Is it that bad?
1418
00:51:07,498 --> 00:51:08,943
Yes, it's that bad.
Dude, your balls
1419
00:51:09,066 --> 00:51:10,568
are in your
goddamn vagina right now.
1420
00:51:10,668 --> 00:51:11,908
Dogs are practice babies.
Don't do it.
1421
00:51:12,002 --> 00:51:14,846
I have an idea. How about
you get out of there?
1422
00:51:14,905 --> 00:51:17,078
I can't get out of there.
I live there. It's my place.
1423
00:51:17,174 --> 00:51:19,085
Wait, I got it.
Fake your own death.
1424
00:51:19,843 --> 00:51:21,015
Drop the Jew-bomb.
1425
00:51:21,078 --> 00:51:22,079
I'm not Jewish.
1426
00:51:22,179 --> 00:51:26,059
Details. Everything with you is
about details, Danny. Just lie.
1427
00:51:26,116 --> 00:51:28,357
Casey, put it on my tab, huh?
Good night.
1428
00:51:28,419 --> 00:51:31,593
Hey, real quick. Before you go, sir.
Trent, that's your future.
1429
00:51:31,689 --> 00:51:32,895
Probably.
1430
00:51:32,957 --> 00:51:33,957
Okay. Good night.
1431
00:51:34,024 --> 00:51:35,094
Hey, be safe, man.
1432
00:51:35,192 --> 00:51:36,193
Danny,
watch the bar for a sec.
1433
00:51:36,260 --> 00:51:39,104
I gotta put this highly
functioning citizen into a cab.
1434
00:51:39,196 --> 00:51:40,197
Yep.
1435
00:51:40,364 --> 00:51:43,311
Casey! You see me right here,
you couldn't choose me?
1436
00:51:43,400 --> 00:51:45,573
Putting Danny back there is like
putting a fox in a hen house!
1437
00:51:45,636 --> 00:51:46,774
The fuck you assholes want?
1438
00:51:46,870 --> 00:51:47,940
Let me get some 1800.
Two beers.
1439
00:51:48,038 --> 00:51:50,746
I like that little towel over your
shoulder. Looks like a matador.
1440
00:51:50,808 --> 00:51:53,414
I learned the tricks of the trade
from the legendary drunks.
1441
00:51:53,477 --> 00:51:55,923
Hemingway, Bukowski, your dad.
1442
00:51:55,980 --> 00:51:56,981
My dad now.
1443
00:51:57,081 --> 00:51:58,253
Any job that lets
me drink you guys
1444
00:51:58,382 --> 00:51:59,622
under the table
is fine with me.
1445
00:51:59,650 --> 00:52:01,323
I'm sorry, what did you say, Isaac?
Is that a challenge?
1446
00:52:01,418 --> 00:52:03,159
Well, you know what?
Possibly.
1447
00:52:03,253 --> 00:52:04,493
I might just meet
you halfway, my friend.
1448
00:52:04,588 --> 00:52:06,590
Tomorrow's a holiday.
I don't have shit to do.
1449
00:52:06,657 --> 00:52:08,295
Where do we hang these guys?
Here, I got you.
1450
00:52:08,392 --> 00:52:10,235
Isaac, stop asking
dumb questions, man.
1451
00:52:10,928 --> 00:52:11,929
Let's do this.
1452
00:52:12,062 --> 00:52:13,097
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
1453
00:52:17,468 --> 00:52:18,469
BERNIE: Ha ha!
1454
00:52:20,270 --> 00:52:22,773
Do it!
You better fucking do it!
1455
00:52:24,308 --> 00:52:25,309
(SCREAMS IN PAIN)
1456
00:52:28,178 --> 00:52:30,681
(ALL YELLING)
1457
00:52:33,817 --> 00:52:34,818
TRENT: Fuck you!
1458
00:52:35,619 --> 00:52:36,654
(SCREAMS)
1459
00:52:37,821 --> 00:52:39,095
Go, go, go, go, 90!
1460
00:52:39,923 --> 00:52:41,994
All the way.
All the way. All the way!
1461
00:52:42,092 --> 00:52:43,093
(WHOOPS)
1462
00:52:44,261 --> 00:52:45,262
Oh!
1463
00:52:46,363 --> 00:52:47,774
Oh!
Oh!
1464
00:52:59,843 --> 00:53:01,447
What time is it?
Almost noon.
1465
00:53:01,512 --> 00:53:03,822
Shit, Deb, listen.
I'm really sorry.
1466
00:53:03,881 --> 00:53:06,293
Can you get the Turkey out of the oven?
I think it's done.
1467
00:53:07,051 --> 00:53:08,792
What can I do to help?
1468
00:53:10,354 --> 00:53:13,563
You can take the Turkey out of the oven.
I think it's done.
1469
00:53:14,658 --> 00:53:15,693
(CHOPPING)
1470
00:53:15,793 --> 00:53:16,794
Okay.
1471
00:53:19,229 --> 00:53:23,041
And you can be unequivocally
supportive of everything I do
1472
00:53:23,133 --> 00:53:25,238
for the next 24 hours.
1473
00:53:26,136 --> 00:53:27,206
(CLATTERING)
1474
00:53:34,978 --> 00:53:35,979
(QUIETLY)
Oh, boy.
1475
00:53:38,348 --> 00:53:42,091
(LATIN LOUNGE MUSIC PLAYING)
1476
00:53:42,186 --> 00:53:43,756
Bernie!
Hey.
1477
00:53:43,854 --> 00:53:46,164
Give me some.
Happy holiday, boy.
1478
00:53:46,657 --> 00:53:48,193
Look at her ass.
1479
00:53:48,258 --> 00:53:50,568
Hey,
this is my new love, Tracy.
1480
00:53:50,661 --> 00:53:51,696
I 941i you.
1481
00:53:51,762 --> 00:53:53,400
That bitch looks
like Tracy Morgan.
1482
00:53:53,497 --> 00:53:54,498
(LAUGHS)
1483
00:53:54,565 --> 00:53:55,566
Ah.
Ah.
1484
00:53:55,666 --> 00:53:56,667
I 941i you.
1485
00:53:56,734 --> 00:53:58,907
(GASPS)
Does she have my fucking dress?
1486
00:53:59,002 --> 00:54:00,722
BERNIE: Oh, let me get that.
Gobble, gobble.
1487
00:54:00,738 --> 00:54:01,739
Enchantée.
1488
00:54:01,839 --> 00:54:03,079
Did she just say, "Enchantée"?
1489
00:54:03,984 --> 00:54:06,185
Come here, baby. Let me introduce
you to everybody else.
1490
00:54:06,210 --> 00:54:07,531
You didn't tell
me she was coming.
1491
00:54:07,544 --> 00:54:09,854
Fellas, this is my new love, Tracy.
Tracy, meet the guys.
1492
00:54:09,913 --> 00:54:11,392
Nice to meet you.
Enchantée.
1493
00:54:11,448 --> 00:54:13,951
She's not French. I can't take it.
No, shh!
1494
00:54:14,051 --> 00:54:16,190
BERNIE: Dude, how
long y'all been here?
1495
00:54:16,253 --> 00:54:17,459
An hour.
Mmm.
1496
00:54:17,554 --> 00:54:18,589
Thank you.
1497
00:54:18,722 --> 00:54:19,723
FRANK: Game's about to come on.
1498
00:54:19,790 --> 00:54:21,531
BERNIE: Go, boy! Go, boy!
1499
00:54:22,392 --> 00:54:23,427
Ay-oh!
1500
00:54:23,527 --> 00:54:25,370
This could be
a good year for them.
1501
00:54:25,596 --> 00:54:26,597
"Enchantée. “."
1502
00:54:27,064 --> 00:54:29,977
This bitch is on my last nerve, Debbie.
I swear. Here, take this.
1503
00:54:30,067 --> 00:54:31,410
No, I'll just get paranoid.
1504
00:54:31,468 --> 00:54:33,812
Right now paranoid would
be relaxed for you. Here.
1505
00:54:34,938 --> 00:54:37,418
I think her butt is fake.
It looks like a pad.
1506
00:54:37,474 --> 00:54:38,646
Do I seem different?
1507
00:54:38,742 --> 00:54:40,050
You just had one hit.
1508
00:54:40,144 --> 00:54:41,452
No, no. I mean, in general.
1509
00:54:41,545 --> 00:54:44,424
Well, it is a little weird that
everyone's having a great time.
1510
00:54:44,481 --> 00:54:47,087
Especially Bernie. And you're
acting like a rodent on crack.
1511
00:54:47,217 --> 00:54:49,390
Danny said he'd help, but he got
drunk last night. "Enchantée."
1512
00:54:49,453 --> 00:54:51,558
So I had to do this
entire goddamn spread.
1513
00:54:51,622 --> 00:54:53,329
I'm definitely
prettier than her, right?
1514
00:54:53,423 --> 00:54:55,835
And I'm overworking myself and
not expressing my feelings,
1515
00:54:55,926 --> 00:54:57,132
and officially
becoming my mother.
1516
00:54:57,227 --> 00:54:59,764
If this bitch was any dumber,
you'd have to water her.
1517
00:54:59,830 --> 00:55:00,900
Oh, God, it's worse than that.
1518
00:55:00,964 --> 00:55:02,739
I've become the person
who says things like,
1519
00:55:02,833 --> 00:55:04,608
"Officially
becoming my mother."
1520
00:55:04,668 --> 00:55:06,944
Okay. Now you're officially high.
Give me that back.
1521
00:55:07,004 --> 00:55:08,847
I gotta go
handle some shit now.
1522
00:55:09,506 --> 00:55:10,507
(SIGHS)
1523
00:55:11,074 --> 00:55:12,075
(SIREN WAILS IN DISTANCE)
1524
00:55:19,349 --> 00:55:23,320
Danny. Can you make sure
people use the coasters?
1525
00:55:23,420 --> 00:55:26,026
Would you like me to enforce
this policy with an iron fist?
1526
00:55:26,123 --> 00:55:28,194
Whatever you think is fine.
1527
00:55:28,592 --> 00:55:30,594
Wait a minute. Baby?
Hmm?
1528
00:55:31,195 --> 00:55:32,333
Are you stoned?
1529
00:55:32,429 --> 00:55:36,434
No. Yes. A little. My forehead
weighs so much right now.
1530
00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:39,181
BERNIE: You know what? I gotta liven
this party up. Come here, baby.
1531
00:55:39,269 --> 00:55:40,269
Uh...
(CLEARS THROAT)
1532
00:55:40,304 --> 00:55:43,046
Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to
take this time to make a toast
1533
00:55:43,140 --> 00:55:44,278
to Danny and Debbie.
1534
00:55:44,341 --> 00:55:46,343
Without them,
we'd be celebrating this
1535
00:55:46,476 --> 00:55:48,478
holiday with binge
drinking and weird sex.
1536
00:55:48,545 --> 00:55:50,786
Keep on drinking, people.
You could still get lucky.
1537
00:55:51,281 --> 00:55:53,056
Some of us have standards.
1538
00:55:53,150 --> 00:55:54,471
I'm sorry.
What did you say, Joan?
1539
00:55:54,785 --> 00:55:56,025
Some of us have standards.
1540
00:55:56,119 --> 00:55:57,559
You know what's funny?
Some of us are
1541
00:55:57,654 --> 00:55:59,031
living proof that if
you get drunk enough,
1542
00:55:59,122 --> 00:56:00,465
those standards will
drop significantly.
1543
00:56:00,524 --> 00:56:02,197
Obviously. I fucked you.
You fucked what?
1544
00:56:02,292 --> 00:56:03,965
You called it fucking?
I didn't call it fucking.
1545
00:56:04,027 --> 00:56:05,529
Don't you dare treat me
like some random chick!
1546
00:56:05,662 --> 00:56:07,164
BERNIE: You better control it.
1547
00:56:07,231 --> 00:56:08,403
No, you control it.
Control it. You control it.
1548
00:56:08,498 --> 00:56:09,499
Bernie; Stop it.
1549
00:56:09,566 --> 00:56:10,566
You control it.
Don't.
1550
00:56:10,634 --> 00:56:11,635
Excuse me, what is your name?
1551
00:56:11,702 --> 00:56:13,010
Oh, I'm...
Exactly.
1552
00:56:13,070 --> 00:56:15,311
No one cares.
Because you are making
1553
00:56:15,472 --> 00:56:17,645
a brief cameo in
a very tragic porno.
1554
00:56:17,708 --> 00:56:18,812
BERNIE: Joan.
1555
00:56:18,876 --> 00:56:21,823
You and I. We meant something.
1556
00:56:23,013 --> 00:56:27,257
(QUIETLY) You felt something, Bernie.
You cried during sex with me.
1557
00:56:32,256 --> 00:56:33,936
I challenge any man
in this room not to cry
1558
00:56:34,057 --> 00:56:35,092
when they have
sex with you, Joan.
1559
00:56:35,192 --> 00:56:36,193
(GASPS)
1560
00:56:37,027 --> 00:56:39,906
Stop it. Okay? I don't
have time for this shit.
1561
00:56:39,997 --> 00:56:41,169
Happy Thanksgiving.
1562
00:56:42,099 --> 00:56:43,203
Sorry, baby.
1563
00:56:43,767 --> 00:56:45,246
Bring it over here.
1564
00:56:46,003 --> 00:56:49,951
Debbie, Danny, this is what
you have to look forward to.
1565
00:56:49,997 --> 00:56:51,717
Joan, no, no, don't. Joan, no!
I am leaving!
1566
00:56:51,742 --> 00:56:53,221
- I'm leaving!
- JOAN: No, I am leaving!
1567
00:56:53,277 --> 00:56:54,277
Stop!
1568
00:56:54,378 --> 00:56:55,550
JOAN: You have a date here, Bernie!
Kiss my ass!
1569
00:56:55,612 --> 00:56:56,682
- Leave me alone.
- DEBBIE: Joan, don't go.
1570
00:56:56,747 --> 00:56:58,226
Tracy, can't you see
I'm trying to storm out
1571
00:56:58,348 --> 00:56:59,828
in dramatic fashion?
Will you come on?
1572
00:56:59,883 --> 00:57:00,918
Get your coat.
Joan, I'm leaving!
1573
00:57:01,018 --> 00:57:02,053
You ain't gonna leave
before I fucking leave!
1574
00:57:02,119 --> 00:57:03,757
No, no, no!
Yes, yes, yes!
1575
00:57:03,854 --> 00:57:05,197
I am leaving!
1576
00:57:05,289 --> 00:57:06,632
Get off the door!
1577
00:57:06,723 --> 00:57:08,031
Get off the door, Joan!
1578
00:57:08,125 --> 00:57:09,399
JOAN: Not your door!
I open my own door!
1579
00:57:09,459 --> 00:57:11,461
BERNIE: You don't even know
how to open a fucking door!
1580
00:57:11,561 --> 00:57:12,596
Don't you close it on me!
1581
00:57:12,729 --> 00:57:13,764
JOAN: I don't want you going...
You get away!
1582
00:57:13,864 --> 00:57:14,865
Fuck you, Joan!
1583
00:57:14,932 --> 00:57:15,933
Fuck you, Bernie!
1584
00:57:16,033 --> 00:57:17,034
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
1585
00:57:17,100 --> 00:57:18,101
Fuck you!
1586
00:57:18,201 --> 00:57:19,201
Fuck you back!
1587
00:57:19,236 --> 00:57:20,909
BERNIE: Fine! Go! Go!
1588
00:57:20,971 --> 00:57:22,279
Tracy, will you please?
Shut up!
1589
00:57:22,372 --> 00:57:24,113
You shut up!
Shut up!
1590
00:57:24,207 --> 00:57:27,950
Hey, Danny. This was a great time, man.
Thanks. All right?
1591
00:57:28,045 --> 00:57:29,217
Save me a plate!
1592
00:57:29,813 --> 00:57:30,814
(DOOR CLOSES)
1593
00:57:33,583 --> 00:57:34,584
(CHUCKLES)
1594
00:57:38,388 --> 00:57:39,389
(GUESTS GASP)
1595
00:57:39,456 --> 00:57:40,457
Holy shit.
1596
00:57:40,557 --> 00:57:41,934
(SIGHS)
That's not good.
1597
00:57:41,992 --> 00:57:43,096
Frosting, anyone?
1598
00:57:47,264 --> 00:57:48,641
Hey.
1599
00:57:48,732 --> 00:57:50,006
What happened?
1600
00:57:50,100 --> 00:57:51,602
I had this
horrible nightmare that
1601
00:57:51,735 --> 00:57:53,237
we had friends
over for Thanksgiving.
1602
00:57:53,303 --> 00:57:56,147
Yeah. It was a nightmare.
But you weren't dreaming.
1603
00:57:56,239 --> 00:57:57,582
Where are you going?
1604
00:57:57,641 --> 00:57:58,642
I gotta run out.
1605
00:57:58,742 --> 00:58:00,619
(GROANS)
(DOOR OPENS)
1606
00:58:02,079 --> 00:58:03,080
(BARKS)
1607
00:58:03,180 --> 00:58:04,750
(GASPS)
on!
1608
00:58:04,815 --> 00:58:07,694
Oh, my God! Hi, puppy!
1609
00:58:08,318 --> 00:58:10,320
Danny, you got him!
1610
00:58:10,420 --> 00:58:11,763
Yeah.
Hi!
1611
00:58:11,989 --> 00:58:13,764
Oh, hug Mommy! Hug me.
1612
00:58:13,824 --> 00:58:15,804
DEBBIE: Baby. Mmm.
1613
00:58:15,859 --> 00:58:19,204
He needs a good home,
and we have that now.
1614
00:58:19,296 --> 00:58:20,331
Yes, we do.
1615
00:58:20,430 --> 00:58:22,376
DANNY: Yeah. Thanks to you.
1616
00:58:23,333 --> 00:58:24,334
Hi!
1617
00:58:24,601 --> 00:58:26,877
He's just like a little baby.
1618
00:58:26,970 --> 00:58:29,143
Yeah. He's awesome.
1619
00:58:29,322 --> 00:58:31,483
BERNIE: Why don't you just
pick the damn dog up, Danny?
1620
00:58:31,508 --> 00:58:33,146
I can't.
He's gotta learn how to walk.
1621
00:58:33,210 --> 00:58:35,156
Just tell him to sit so you
can at least look better.
1622
00:58:35,212 --> 00:58:36,252
You look stupid right now.
1623
00:58:36,313 --> 00:58:38,224
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING)
Pacino.
1624
00:58:38,315 --> 00:58:40,727
Thanks for your time.
You have my résumé.
1625
00:58:41,551 --> 00:58:43,792
♪ Hurry now and don't be late ♪
1626
00:58:43,854 --> 00:58:45,629
♪ 'Cause we ain't ♪
♪ got time to chat ♪
1627
00:58:46,523 --> 00:58:48,628
♪ You and me were going out ♪
1628
00:58:48,959 --> 00:58:50,700
♪ To catch the latest sound ♪
1629
00:58:50,794 --> 00:58:52,899
You're doing good. Come here.
1630
00:58:55,665 --> 00:58:56,666
Good luck out there.
1631
00:58:56,733 --> 00:58:57,734
Yeah.
1632
00:58:57,834 --> 00:58:58,869
♪ ...prepare yourself ♪
1633
00:58:58,969 --> 00:59:01,415
♪ For the rubber-band man ♪
1634
00:59:01,638 --> 00:59:03,413
♪ You never heard a sound ♪
1635
00:59:03,507 --> 00:59:06,488
♪ Like the rubber-band man ♪
1636
00:59:07,744 --> 00:59:09,223
(CASEY EXCLAIMS IN DELIGHT)
(BARKS)
1637
00:59:09,312 --> 00:59:10,472
What do you think?
Oh, my God.
1638
00:59:10,514 --> 00:59:13,893
What a surprise.
Hello, beautiful. Come here.
1639
00:59:13,984 --> 00:59:15,657
Oh, he's adorable.
1640
00:59:15,719 --> 00:59:17,323
What's his name?
1641
00:59:17,421 --> 00:59:19,025
His name's Pacino.
Pacino, this is Casey.
1642
00:59:19,089 --> 00:59:21,091
Hey, you talking to me?
You talking to me?
1643
00:59:21,191 --> 00:59:22,192
That's De Niro.
1644
00:59:22,259 --> 00:59:24,535
I'm De Niro talking to Pacino.
1645
00:59:24,594 --> 00:59:25,766
Come on.
Ah. Right.
1646
00:59:25,862 --> 00:59:29,002
Yeah. Casey, listen, um,
I could use a favor.
1647
00:59:29,666 --> 00:59:30,770
Name it.
1648
00:59:38,775 --> 00:59:41,449
DEBBIE: Hey. How was your
first night bartending?
1649
00:59:41,545 --> 00:59:43,889
It's fine. Fine.
I thought you'd be sleeping.
1650
00:59:43,947 --> 00:59:47,588
Yeah, my flight's at 7:00. I figured
I'd stay up, sleep on the plane.
1651
00:59:48,085 --> 00:59:49,189
Mmm.
I wanted to see you.
1652
00:59:50,587 --> 00:59:51,793
Yeah.
1653
00:59:51,888 --> 00:59:53,868
You're only going to
Chicago for two days.
1654
00:59:53,924 --> 00:59:56,200
I think we can go two days
without seeing each other.
1655
00:59:56,860 --> 00:59:58,635
Yeah,
but it's your first night.
1656
00:59:58,728 --> 01:00:01,231
You know what, Debbie?
It's just an in-between thing
1657
01:00:01,298 --> 01:00:03,471
until I find
a better job, okay?
1658
01:00:03,800 --> 01:00:06,280
You don't need to make
a big deal out of it.
1659
01:00:08,805 --> 01:00:09,806
(DANNY SUMS)
1660
01:00:09,906 --> 01:00:11,283
Okay.
(CLEARS THROAT)
1661
01:00:12,042 --> 01:00:13,612
What are we
fighting about now?
1662
01:00:13,710 --> 01:00:16,748
I don't know. You tell me,
you're picking one.
1663
01:00:17,214 --> 01:00:18,557
DEBBIE: No, no, no, no, no!
1664
01:00:18,882 --> 01:00:19,882
(GROANS)
Bad dog!
1665
01:00:19,916 --> 01:00:22,055
Damn it! My best shoe.
1666
01:00:22,385 --> 01:00:23,665
Why are you
packing those anyway?
1667
01:00:23,720 --> 01:00:24,824
Are you trying to
look nice for Steven?
1668
01:00:24,921 --> 01:00:26,161
You don't need to
throw that in my face
1669
01:00:26,245 --> 01:00:27,566
just to make
yourself feel better.
1670
01:00:27,591 --> 01:00:29,935
All I wanted to
do was come home,
1671
01:00:29,993 --> 01:00:32,496
watch Sports Center, drink a
beer and go the fuck to sleep.
1672
01:00:32,729 --> 01:00:33,730
(SIGHS)
1673
01:00:34,598 --> 01:00:36,077
So what,
are you storming out now?
1674
01:00:36,133 --> 01:00:38,093
I'm going to Joan's!
I'll see you when I get back.
1675
01:00:38,101 --> 01:00:39,774
Why do you get to be
the one to walk out?
1676
01:00:39,836 --> 01:00:42,510
Because this is
your apartment, moron.
1677
01:00:45,942 --> 01:00:47,751
(PACINO GRUNTS)
1678
01:00:53,517 --> 01:00:55,929
Did Mommy just
call me a moron?
1679
01:00:55,986 --> 01:00:57,659
DEBBIE: I don't know what to do.
Should I call him?
1680
01:00:57,754 --> 01:00:59,995
I don't wanna leave angry,
but I am angry.
1681
01:01:00,090 --> 01:01:02,536
And if I pretend like I'm not,
just so we get better,
1682
01:01:02,626 --> 01:01:04,936
this entire thing is
gonna start all over again.
1683
01:01:05,262 --> 01:01:07,264
Am I boring you?
1684
01:01:07,330 --> 01:01:09,435
It is 5:30 in the morning.
1685
01:01:09,499 --> 01:01:12,480
Only Starbucks employees and
babies are up at this hour.
1686
01:01:12,536 --> 01:01:16,211
I am exhausted and, yes, you
are boring the shit out of me.
1687
01:01:16,373 --> 01:01:19,718
Just really want this to work,
and I feel like he's giving up!
1688
01:01:19,809 --> 01:01:21,652
Which only makes me work harder,
and then I become the bitch.
1689
01:01:21,778 --> 01:01:23,951
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
Who's texting you at this hour?
1690
01:01:24,648 --> 01:01:26,321
No, you don't
want to know. It's fine.
1691
01:01:26,383 --> 01:01:27,384
What should I do about Danny?
1692
01:01:27,484 --> 01:01:29,124
Why do you want my
advice all of a sudden?
1693
01:01:29,203 --> 01:01:31,763
You moved in with him, despite all
of my excellent advice not to.
1694
01:01:31,788 --> 01:01:32,788
(URINATING)
1695
01:01:32,822 --> 01:01:35,393
You have my permission to move
out if that's what you want.
1696
01:01:36,726 --> 01:01:38,501
Is somebody here?
It's my new roommate.
1697
01:01:38,562 --> 01:01:40,303
- Is it a guy?
- Basically.
1698
01:01:40,363 --> 01:01:41,403
Basically?
(TOILET FLUSHES)
1699
01:01:41,464 --> 01:01:43,307
After you abandoned me,
I had to replace you.
1700
01:01:43,567 --> 01:01:45,137
(GROANS AND COUGHS)
1701
01:01:47,737 --> 01:01:48,738
'SUP-
1702
01:01:48,838 --> 01:01:49,839
Hi.
1703
01:01:55,412 --> 01:01:58,359
That bitch just
took my last soy milk.
1704
01:01:58,415 --> 01:02:00,895
I hope she remembered
to lift the toilet seat.
1705
01:02:02,352 --> 01:02:03,490
Please come back, Deb.
1706
01:02:04,588 --> 01:02:05,658
Please.
1707
01:02:06,990 --> 01:02:10,096
DEBBIE: So, whether in L.A.
or here in Chicago,
1708
01:02:10,193 --> 01:02:13,072
with Near Field Communication, you
can take the music from your phone
1709
01:02:13,163 --> 01:02:15,575
and, just like that,
little tap, right in your ear.
1710
01:02:15,665 --> 01:02:16,666
Ah. Yeah.
1711
01:02:16,733 --> 01:02:19,009
And just like that
1712
01:02:19,536 --> 01:02:21,573
from your phone
to your speaker.
1713
01:02:21,705 --> 01:02:23,685
(MUSIC PLAYING)
1714
01:02:28,044 --> 01:02:30,923
Three Olives on the rocks.
1715
01:02:32,015 --> 01:02:33,016
Hi.
1716
01:02:33,083 --> 01:02:34,187
Alison.
1717
01:02:34,251 --> 01:02:37,789
I just got back from Paris.
I was hoping I'd run into you.
1718
01:02:37,887 --> 01:02:39,730
Just not behind the bar.
1719
01:02:40,190 --> 01:02:43,194
What happened? I hope this
has nothing to do with me.
1720
01:02:43,393 --> 01:02:44,673
You are
the 'cause of all things.
1721
01:02:44,694 --> 01:02:45,798
I know.
1722
01:02:46,129 --> 01:02:47,733
We can be friends,
though, can't we?
1723
01:02:47,797 --> 01:02:50,744
I could really use a friend
right now and a drink.
1724
01:02:50,800 --> 01:02:51,870
Put your money away.
1725
01:02:51,935 --> 01:02:53,039
You look great.
1726
01:02:54,070 --> 01:02:55,777
So, how have you been?
1727
01:02:56,039 --> 01:02:57,074
(TAPS BAR TOP)
1728
01:02:57,140 --> 01:02:58,140
Living the dream.
1729
01:02:58,208 --> 01:03:02,782
Well, I can tell by your cold
and distant demeanor,
1730
01:03:02,879 --> 01:03:03,960
you must be seeing someone.
1731
01:03:03,980 --> 01:03:04,981
Yeah.
1732
01:03:05,115 --> 01:03:06,116
Yeah.
1733
01:03:06,216 --> 01:03:07,320
Debbie.
Oh, Debbie.
1734
01:03:07,417 --> 01:03:11,490
That's cute. Ifs so high school.
Are you guys going steady?
1735
01:03:11,588 --> 01:03:12,589
(CHUCKLES)
1736
01:03:13,056 --> 01:03:15,127
I got other
customers, Alison.
1737
01:03:18,061 --> 01:03:19,267
I'll be right here.
1738
01:03:20,263 --> 01:03:22,072
Thanks for the drink.
(SIGHS)
1739
01:03:23,600 --> 01:03:24,908
Is your suite on this floor?
1740
01:03:25,568 --> 01:03:26,672
No.
1741
01:03:26,770 --> 01:03:27,942
Stop.
1742
01:03:28,004 --> 01:03:29,483
He won't know.
But I would.
1743
01:03:29,572 --> 01:03:31,142
You're acting like you have
a ring on your finger.
1744
01:03:31,241 --> 01:03:32,686
I don't need
a ring on my finger.
1745
01:03:32,809 --> 01:03:34,254
Look at me.
Don't I look different?
1746
01:03:35,078 --> 01:03:37,786
I'm crazy about this guy. I live with him.
We have a life together.
1747
01:03:37,847 --> 01:03:39,155
Does he love you?
1748
01:03:42,852 --> 01:03:45,162
If he doesn't, he's an idiot.
1749
01:03:46,790 --> 01:03:47,791
Hey.
1750
01:03:49,492 --> 01:03:50,630
You talking to me?
1751
01:03:51,027 --> 01:03:52,529
I forgot what
a nice guy you can be.
1752
01:03:52,629 --> 01:03:55,439
Yeah, I hate that about me.
1753
01:03:55,532 --> 01:03:56,533
(LAUGHS)
1754
01:03:56,633 --> 01:03:57,771
Good night.
1755
01:03:57,934 --> 01:03:59,038
Night.
1756
01:03:59,135 --> 01:04:00,944
I don't know
where she lives now.
1757
01:04:01,037 --> 01:04:02,846
She won't tell me.
Should I put her in a cab?
1758
01:04:02,939 --> 01:04:04,659
CASEY: You can't put her
in a cab like that.
1759
01:04:04,708 --> 01:04:06,346
Right.
Okay, so what should I do?
1760
01:04:06,443 --> 01:04:08,013
Put her on a train.
1761
01:04:09,479 --> 01:04:10,787
Kidding.
1762
01:04:11,147 --> 01:04:13,149
We can't leave
her here like that.
1763
01:04:13,216 --> 01:04:15,196
Okay. Yeah.
1764
01:04:16,786 --> 01:04:17,786
Yeah, I got you.
1765
01:04:17,821 --> 01:04:20,392
I love it when you
take such good care of me.
1766
01:04:21,124 --> 01:04:22,501
That's what I do.
1767
01:04:22,582 --> 01:04:24,102
This reminds me
of the old times, huh?
1768
01:04:24,127 --> 01:04:25,401
Really?
Yeah.
1769
01:04:25,495 --> 01:04:28,738
Okay. Do me a favor.
Just sit right here.
1770
01:04:28,832 --> 01:04:30,209
Yes, I will sit.
1771
01:04:30,300 --> 01:04:31,904
That's how you want me?
(LAUGHS)
1772
01:04:32,001 --> 01:04:33,708
(STAMMERING)
Don't start.
1773
01:04:33,803 --> 01:04:34,803
You want it on the chair?
1774
01:04:34,838 --> 01:04:35,839
You want us sitting?
1775
01:04:35,905 --> 01:04:37,350
Oh! Okay. Yeah.
1776
01:04:37,407 --> 01:04:39,045
(SIGHS)
Yeah. Damn.
1777
01:04:39,142 --> 01:04:40,678
Okay, all right. Yeah.
1778
01:04:40,744 --> 01:04:41,814
I'm gonna go away
right quick, okay?
1779
01:04:41,911 --> 01:04:42,912
Okay.
1780
01:04:43,012 --> 01:04:44,150
That's great,
you just hold onto that.
1781
01:04:44,314 --> 01:04:45,349
All right.
1782
01:04:45,482 --> 01:04:47,359
Be right back. Stay right there.
I'll be right here.
1783
01:04:47,417 --> 01:04:48,418
(ENSUES)
1784
01:04:49,853 --> 01:04:50,854
(PACINO BARKS)
1785
01:04:50,987 --> 01:04:51,987
(GASPS)
on.
1786
01:04:52,021 --> 01:04:53,864
You have a puppy?
1787
01:04:53,923 --> 01:04:55,231
Hi, Puppy. So cute.
1788
01:04:55,325 --> 01:04:57,362
(BARKS AND GROWLS)
1789
01:04:57,427 --> 01:04:58,997
Pacino.
1790
01:04:59,062 --> 01:05:00,700
Sorry about that.
Here's some water.
1791
01:05:00,764 --> 01:05:02,675
Oh. Water?
1792
01:05:02,732 --> 01:05:03,733
Drink that. L.A. tap.
1793
01:05:03,833 --> 01:05:04,833
(CONTINUES BARKING)
1794
01:05:04,868 --> 01:05:06,404
Pacino, come here. Good boy.
1795
01:05:08,204 --> 01:05:09,239
I'll be right back.
1796
01:05:09,372 --> 01:05:10,407
Be right here.
1797
01:05:10,673 --> 01:05:11,674
(LAUGHS)
1798
01:05:19,182 --> 01:05:22,026
It's all right, kid. I'll get her out
of here. I'm gonna call her a cab.
1799
01:05:22,585 --> 01:05:25,532
Right? Then I'm gonna jerk-off
like I do when Mommy's not here.
1800
01:05:25,955 --> 01:05:27,866
And sometimes
when Mommy is here.
1801
01:05:32,529 --> 01:05:33,530
(WHINING INQUISITIVELY)
1802
01:05:37,133 --> 01:05:38,373
Hi.
1803
01:05:38,435 --> 01:05:39,539
Hi.
1804
01:05:39,602 --> 01:05:41,081
You moved.
Yeah.
1805
01:05:41,137 --> 01:05:42,577
I just wanted to
be more comfortable.
1806
01:05:42,605 --> 01:05:43,913
Hey, okay-
1807
01:05:43,973 --> 01:05:46,078
It's a nice couch.
1808
01:05:46,409 --> 01:05:49,618
This Daisy girl really has
changed you, Dan-Dan.
1809
01:05:49,712 --> 01:05:51,589
H's Debbie.
And she hasn't changed me.
1810
01:05:51,648 --> 01:05:53,924
She makes me wanna change
myself, all right?
1811
01:05:53,983 --> 01:05:55,553
She pushes me. It's good.
1812
01:05:55,718 --> 01:05:57,391
You like to be pushed,
don't you?
1813
01:05:57,487 --> 01:05:59,467
It's different with her, Alison.
(LAUGHING)
1814
01:05:59,556 --> 01:06:00,967
Right. All right.
1815
01:06:01,057 --> 01:06:03,469
Oh, my God.
No, this is not good.
1816
01:06:03,560 --> 01:06:05,972
Oh, shit, fuck. Jeez.
(GROANS)
1817
01:06:06,930 --> 01:06:09,467
You know what? You should go.
That would just be better.
1818
01:06:09,566 --> 01:06:11,739
Someone wants to
play hard to get.
1819
01:06:11,801 --> 01:06:13,576
You're crawling. Okay.
1820
01:06:13,636 --> 01:06:16,981
Come on, Dan-Dan. Give me a
chance to do right by you.
1821
01:06:17,073 --> 01:06:19,110
That's exactly
what I'm doing. Trust me.
1822
01:06:19,175 --> 01:06:20,176
Are you sure about that?
1823
01:06:20,677 --> 01:06:21,815
Yeah.
1824
01:06:21,911 --> 01:06:23,117
Yeah?
Yeah, I'm sure.
1825
01:06:23,179 --> 01:06:26,786
Well, somebody else is telling
me something very different.
1826
01:06:26,850 --> 01:06:29,694
(MOANS) Oh, yeah, don't listen to him,
'cause he gets me in trouble every time.
1827
01:06:29,786 --> 01:06:33,290
Here is your coat and purse.
1828
01:06:33,790 --> 01:06:35,326
Here's cab fare.
1829
01:06:35,425 --> 01:06:36,986
You're gonna regret
this when you've got
1830
01:06:37,093 --> 01:06:38,733
two kids and you're
living in the suburbs,
1831
01:06:38,761 --> 01:06:40,638
but I wish you well.
1832
01:06:40,697 --> 01:06:41,698
Mwah.
1833
01:06:44,534 --> 01:06:46,844
Call me when
you're feeling horny.
1834
01:06:48,371 --> 01:06:50,442
What upsets me most is not
that I had Alison over,
1835
01:06:50,507 --> 01:06:53,215
or that she wanted my
junk like never before.
1836
01:06:53,309 --> 01:06:55,016
It was crazy, dude.
1837
01:06:55,111 --> 01:06:56,112
Whew!
1838
01:06:56,346 --> 01:06:58,690
But, you know,
I have now become that guy
1839
01:06:58,815 --> 01:07:01,125
who cares about
the damn coaster.
1840
01:07:01,217 --> 01:07:03,857
On top of that, I'm gonna have
to hear Debbie's mouth about it.
1841
01:07:03,953 --> 01:07:05,398
Let me tell you something.
I'd rather lick Pacino's ass
1842
01:07:05,488 --> 01:07:07,195
before I heard a woman's mouth
over some damn coasters.
1843
01:07:07,290 --> 01:07:09,827
You wanna lick my dog's ass, you might
want to pet him first, homeboy.
1844
01:07:09,893 --> 01:07:11,873
Boom! Uh-huh!
Suck on that, Stankbud NYC!
1845
01:07:11,995 --> 01:07:13,975
Right between
your eyes, bitch.
1846
01:07:14,364 --> 01:07:15,968
What? What'd you say?
1847
01:07:16,165 --> 01:07:17,166
No, that's real funny.
1848
01:07:17,233 --> 01:07:18,354
You know what else is funny?
1849
01:07:18,368 --> 01:07:20,678
The fact that you haven't seen
alive actual vagina.
1850
01:07:20,737 --> 01:07:24,742
Yeah, I have. Sucks to be 13, doesn't it?
Whatever. Scoreboard, bitch.
1851
01:07:24,841 --> 01:07:26,218
Hey, what am I supposed to do?
1852
01:07:26,309 --> 01:07:27,829
What you're gonna
do is play your side!
1853
01:07:27,844 --> 01:07:29,221
All right, I got it!
Stop yelling at me.
1854
01:07:29,312 --> 01:07:31,053
Get in the bunker, Danny!
All right! I'm in! Just relax.
1855
01:07:31,147 --> 01:07:33,149
What you gonna do?
Shouldn't love handle all this?
1856
01:07:33,216 --> 01:07:34,752
I mean,
love and your practice baby.
1857
01:07:34,851 --> 01:07:36,489
Seriously,
you're like a gay couple
1858
01:07:36,586 --> 01:07:38,190
staying together
just for the damn dog.
1859
01:07:38,321 --> 01:07:40,028
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
Pause it. Seriously, my phone.
1860
01:07:40,089 --> 01:07:41,329
Pause it.
1861
01:07:43,693 --> 01:07:44,728
Who you texting?
1862
01:07:44,827 --> 01:07:47,330
So nasty. Nobody.
I just gotta send something.
1863
01:07:47,730 --> 01:07:49,175
(CHUCKLES)
1864
01:07:49,232 --> 01:07:50,575
Hey, let me see, man.
1865
01:07:50,667 --> 01:07:51,702
What'd she send you?
1866
01:07:51,768 --> 01:07:53,648
Come on, man. Let me just
live vicariously, man.
1867
01:07:53,670 --> 01:07:54,671
Come on. I know you got
photos in there, man.
1868
01:07:54,737 --> 01:07:55,943
No. She sent you
pictures, didn't she?
1869
01:07:56,035 --> 01:07:57,315
Dude,
it's none of your business.
1870
01:07:57,340 --> 01:07:58,341
Come on. Let me see.
If I did...
1871
01:07:58,408 --> 01:08:00,115
I can't let you see them.
Come on. She got nice tities?
1872
01:08:00,209 --> 01:08:01,449
Yo, stop being weird.
Seriously.
1873
01:08:01,511 --> 01:08:03,616
She got nice tities. I knew it, man.
Let me see the phone.
1874
01:08:03,713 --> 01:08:05,693
Danny, you're freaking me out.
Bernie, let me see your phone.
1875
01:08:05,748 --> 01:08:07,056
It's my phone! Stop.
1876
01:08:07,116 --> 01:08:10,689
I'm not letting you...
Danny, get off the phone, man!
1877
01:08:11,521 --> 01:08:12,642
The first picture's my dick.
1878
01:08:13,356 --> 01:08:14,926
Where?
Right there, man!
1879
01:08:16,092 --> 01:08:17,264
Give me my phone.
1880
01:08:25,717 --> 01:08:27,078
DEBBIE: Did you sleep with her?
No.
1881
01:08:27,103 --> 01:08:29,103
I'd rather you just tell me if you...
I said, "No."
1882
01:08:29,105 --> 01:08:30,584
Did you want to
sleep with her?
1883
01:08:30,707 --> 01:08:32,152
If I wanted to, I could have.
1884
01:08:33,376 --> 01:08:35,720
(JAZZY MUSIC PLAYING)
1885
01:08:46,389 --> 01:08:47,390
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
1886
01:08:51,127 --> 01:08:52,902
Bitch, did you just
send me to ignore?
1887
01:08:52,962 --> 01:08:55,362
Come on. I have earned a courtesy
ring through to voice-mail.
1888
01:08:55,498 --> 01:08:58,104
I miss you. Come out! Cab me.
1889
01:09:01,671 --> 01:09:05,949
♪ It's been a blue ♪
1890
01:09:07,844 --> 01:09:09,346
♪ Holiday ♪
1891
01:09:12,148 --> 01:09:15,595
♪ Darling, ♪
♪ since you've been gone ♪
1892
01:09:16,986 --> 01:09:18,124
Sorry.
1893
01:09:19,355 --> 01:09:20,857
♪ I need you ♪
1894
01:09:20,957 --> 01:09:21,958
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
1895
01:09:22,291 --> 01:09:24,168
♪ Darling, I need you ♪
1896
01:09:26,763 --> 01:09:29,369
BERNIE: Wow. Are you
serious right now, Danny?
1897
01:09:29,465 --> 01:09:32,173
That was such an obvious
ignore button move.
1898
01:09:32,268 --> 01:09:35,181
Dude, where are you? Like,
you're officially Mia right now.
1899
01:09:35,271 --> 01:09:38,514
Come be a friend. Come get
shit-faced with your boy. Bye.
1900
01:09:39,008 --> 01:09:42,717
Fuck him. Merry Christmas,
bitches. (LAUGHS)
1901
01:09:42,812 --> 01:09:45,816
To you and me. To us.
1902
01:09:46,315 --> 01:09:48,693
To a new year together.
1903
01:10:04,133 --> 01:10:05,635
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
1904
01:10:09,338 --> 01:10:10,339
Yeah?
1905
01:10:10,506 --> 01:10:11,678
BERNIE: You still grounded?
1906
01:10:11,741 --> 01:10:14,585
Tell the ball and chain to lighten
up and get your ass over here!
1907
01:10:14,677 --> 01:10:15,712
Funny 9W-
1908
01:10:15,845 --> 01:10:16,880
BERNIE: It's New Year's, bitch!
1909
01:10:16,979 --> 01:10:18,856
Talk to you later.
(GROANS)
1910
01:10:18,915 --> 01:10:20,155
Bernie?
1911
01:10:20,316 --> 01:10:21,556
What's left of him.
1912
01:10:21,651 --> 01:10:22,651
Everyone at the Broadway?
1913
01:10:22,685 --> 01:10:23,686
Sounded like it.
1914
01:10:28,991 --> 01:10:30,026
Let's go.
1915
01:10:30,193 --> 01:10:31,194
Go where?
1916
01:10:31,327 --> 01:10:32,829
To the Broadway. Let's go.
1917
01:10:33,096 --> 01:10:34,097
Um...
1918
01:10:34,363 --> 01:10:35,569
Are you sure? We have this...
1919
01:10:35,665 --> 01:10:37,226
Yeah. You know,
we should have some fun.
1920
01:10:38,401 --> 01:10:39,573
I need some fun.
1921
01:10:40,203 --> 01:10:41,773
I'll walk Pacino.
1922
01:10:42,438 --> 01:10:43,439
(WHISTLES)
1923
01:10:43,539 --> 01:10:45,416
Here, boy. (CLAPS)
(PACINO BARKS)
1924
01:10:45,508 --> 01:10:47,715
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
1925
01:10:47,777 --> 01:10:48,778
Hey, Danny!
1926
01:10:49,612 --> 01:10:51,285
Over here!
Bernie!
1927
01:10:51,380 --> 01:10:54,122
BERNIE: Come over here! I got
shots for you over here!
1928
01:10:54,217 --> 01:10:56,026
Come on this side!
Hey, mother...
1929
01:10:57,120 --> 01:10:58,758
Look, I got it.
I'm good. I'm all right!
1930
01:10:59,055 --> 01:11:00,056
(LAUGHS)
1931
01:11:00,439 --> 01:11:01,599
What's up, man?
What up, baby?
1932
01:11:01,624 --> 01:11:03,262
Here. It'll make you
all right. Come on.
1933
01:11:03,359 --> 01:11:04,599
Yes, sir!
Hey, Bernie!
1934
01:11:04,694 --> 01:11:05,695
Hey.
1935
01:11:05,762 --> 01:11:06,763
Hey, Deb.
1936
01:11:06,929 --> 01:11:07,964
Happy new year!
1937
01:11:08,064 --> 01:11:10,203
Slow down, man!
What're you doing?
1938
01:11:10,266 --> 01:11:12,109
Today's a holiday, baby.
No, no, no.
1939
01:11:12,201 --> 01:11:13,908
I only paid for one. Hey.
1940
01:11:14,237 --> 01:11:15,272
(CHUCKLES)
1941
01:11:15,371 --> 01:11:16,611
Danny. Okay, okay.
1942
01:11:16,739 --> 01:11:17,979
Happy new year!
1943
01:11:18,374 --> 01:11:19,546
(PEOPLE WHOOPING)
1944
01:11:21,911 --> 01:11:23,288
BERNIE: All right.
Okay, slow down
1945
01:11:23,609 --> 01:11:24,889
Danny,
I'm going to the bathroom.
1946
01:11:24,914 --> 01:11:25,915
What?
1947
01:11:25,982 --> 01:11:26,983
I'll be right back.
1948
01:11:27,083 --> 01:11:28,221
I love you, too.
1949
01:11:28,484 --> 01:11:29,622
Hey, cowboy, what's up?
1950
01:11:29,719 --> 01:11:31,096
What, did you just get out
of jail or something, man?
1951
01:11:31,154 --> 01:11:32,428
Basically, yeah!
1952
01:11:32,488 --> 01:11:34,627
BERNIE: All right, look, slow down!
Okay?
1953
01:11:34,724 --> 01:11:36,226
No, Danny.
For real, slow down.
1954
01:11:36,492 --> 01:11:39,439
Danny. Danny, look at me.
That's like four in a row, man!
1955
01:11:39,495 --> 01:11:40,838
Come on!
One more round! Let's go!
1956
01:11:40,930 --> 01:11:42,136
You didn't drive?
No!
1957
01:11:42,231 --> 01:11:44,432
You ain't gonna go and get all
crazy in here. Take this.
1958
01:11:44,433 --> 01:11:45,605
There you go. Right there.
1959
01:11:45,968 --> 01:11:47,470
What is that?
It's a hangover patch!
1960
01:11:47,570 --> 01:11:49,140
Awesome!
Okay!
1961
01:11:49,238 --> 01:11:51,013
Happy new year!
1962
01:11:51,407 --> 01:11:53,011
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
1963
01:11:56,946 --> 01:11:59,256
Debbie! Oh, my God!
1964
01:11:59,415 --> 01:12:03,591
I can't believe you're here!
(GASPS) This is so great.
1965
01:12:04,787 --> 01:12:06,528
(STAMMERING)
I can't do this.
1966
01:12:06,622 --> 01:12:08,823
No, listen. We'll go, we're
gonna find Danny and then...
1967
01:12:08,858 --> 01:12:10,929
Danny just wants
to be with his boys.
1968
01:12:11,127 --> 01:12:12,868
I don't even
know why I'm here.
1969
01:12:13,129 --> 01:12:15,006
This isn't fun anymore.
1970
01:12:15,097 --> 01:12:17,703
So, we'll make it fun, Deb.
1971
01:12:18,134 --> 01:12:19,977
I'm done. Okay?
1972
01:12:20,369 --> 01:12:21,370
I'm calling a cab.
1973
01:12:23,206 --> 01:12:25,152
This is gonna be my year.
Right. Yeah.
1974
01:12:25,208 --> 01:12:26,346
Stop that!
I don't like that. Stop.
1975
01:12:26,442 --> 01:12:28,444
Danny, I'm going home.
1976
01:12:28,511 --> 01:12:30,491
(LAUGHS)
Wow.
1977
01:12:30,546 --> 01:12:32,787
Joan, you were right.
Your friend is boring.
1978
01:12:32,849 --> 01:12:35,625
Hey, don't call my friend
boring, dick-breath.
1979
01:12:35,685 --> 01:12:36,686
Whoa! Joan.
1980
01:12:36,819 --> 01:12:37,820
Damn it, Joan!
1981
01:12:37,887 --> 01:12:38,888
I was just joking.
1982
01:12:38,988 --> 01:12:39,989
Okay.
1983
01:12:40,056 --> 01:12:41,776
Shouldn't you be arguing
with Bernie anyway?
1984
01:12:41,791 --> 01:12:43,065
I mean,
that's what you guys do best.
1985
01:12:43,159 --> 01:12:44,160
Don't disrespect me.
I'm not doing...
1986
01:12:44,293 --> 01:12:45,328
BERNIE: What?
1987
01:12:45,394 --> 01:12:47,135
You gonna throw me under the bus?
Gonna bring it right here.
1988
01:12:47,196 --> 01:12:48,402
For no reason.
My bad.
1989
01:12:48,731 --> 01:12:51,007
Deb, listen, we just got here.
1990
01:12:51,067 --> 01:12:54,139
It's a party. It's a celebration.
It's New Years Eve!
1991
01:12:54,370 --> 01:12:55,508
Are you coming, or what?
1992
01:12:56,505 --> 01:12:58,883
I really don't wanna spend
tonight of all nights
1993
01:12:58,975 --> 01:13:01,148
doing what we're gonna
be doing all next year.
1994
01:13:02,812 --> 01:13:03,813
Fighting.
1995
01:13:04,313 --> 01:13:06,486
That's my cue.
(CLEARS THROAT)
1996
01:13:09,518 --> 01:13:11,395
No. No, Debbie, no!
1997
01:13:13,155 --> 01:13:15,192
(QUIETLY) Fuck.
Fuck, I fucked that up.
1998
01:13:15,258 --> 01:13:16,236
Fucking wonderful, asshole!
1999
01:13:16,325 --> 01:13:19,397
BERNIE: You fucked that up, I'll
be the first to tell you that.
2000
01:13:19,495 --> 01:13:20,667
I'll see you later.
Yeah.
2001
01:13:20,997 --> 01:13:22,704
- (GROANS)
- What was that?
2002
01:13:22,765 --> 01:13:24,335
They getting good at that
arguing shit, ain't they?
2003
01:13:24,400 --> 01:13:28,212
Yes, I mean, that was some legendary
Olympic 100-meter hurdle shit!
2004
01:13:28,271 --> 01:13:29,909
Hey,
we gotta step our game up.
2005
01:13:30,006 --> 01:13:30,950
Absolutely.
We gonna have to after that.
2006
01:13:31,040 --> 01:13:32,041
Oh, yeah.
2007
01:13:32,108 --> 01:13:33,746
CROWD: Nine, eight, seven...
2008
01:13:33,843 --> 01:13:35,413
Here we go.
2009
01:13:35,511 --> 01:13:37,081
Six, five, four...
2010
01:13:37,213 --> 01:13:38,783
Deb! Deb!
2011
01:13:38,881 --> 01:13:42,021
Three, two, one!
2012
01:13:42,084 --> 01:13:43,791
Happy new year!
2013
01:13:43,886 --> 01:13:45,058
(CROWD CHEERING)
2014
01:13:45,121 --> 01:13:49,194
♪ Should old acquaintance ♪
♪ be forgot ♪
2015
01:13:50,726 --> 01:13:51,727
♪ And never... ♪
2016
01:13:51,861 --> 01:13:53,135
Happy new year.
2017
01:13:53,229 --> 01:13:56,870
BERNIE: Listen to me. I can't
stand your goddamn guts, girl.
2018
01:13:57,033 --> 01:14:00,810
It's the new year. Give me a wet kiss.
Let me get one. Come on.
2019
01:14:03,806 --> 01:14:05,080
(LAUGHING)
2020
01:14:05,141 --> 01:14:06,141
That's what you do?
2021
01:14:06,208 --> 01:14:07,209
Was it wet enough?
2022
01:14:07,276 --> 01:14:08,756
It's just like your
damn nasty tongue.
2023
01:14:09,712 --> 01:14:10,713
Jerk.
2024
01:14:10,780 --> 01:14:12,123
Happy new year, motherfucker.
2025
01:14:12,248 --> 01:14:13,625
Happy new year, asshole.
2026
01:14:13,716 --> 01:14:15,923
(BOTH LAUGHING)
2027
01:14:23,592 --> 01:14:25,833
I'll be back tomorrow
for the rest of my stuff.
2028
01:14:26,829 --> 01:14:28,001
Please don't be here.
2029
01:14:30,666 --> 01:14:31,838
Honestly?
2030
01:14:34,270 --> 01:14:37,342
For a stupid New Year's Eve party, Deb?
Come on.
2031
01:14:37,440 --> 01:14:39,283
No. And you know it.
2032
01:14:40,810 --> 01:14:42,687
So why don't you just say it?
2033
01:14:48,017 --> 01:14:49,018
(SIGHS)
2034
01:14:53,823 --> 01:14:55,427
I'm not happy.
2035
01:14:55,758 --> 01:14:56,759
Yeah.
2036
01:14:58,995 --> 01:15:01,134
That's been completely
obvious since Alison.
2037
01:15:01,197 --> 01:15:04,337
Stop acting like I cheated on you.
I never cheated on you.
2038
01:15:04,433 --> 01:15:06,674
I didn't realize it was
such a sacrifice for you.
2039
01:15:08,337 --> 01:15:10,112
(ZIPPING SUITCASE)
2040
01:15:11,040 --> 01:15:15,386
You think you're the only one who
turned down sex from their ex?
2041
01:15:18,647 --> 01:15:19,990
So you're not happy either?
2042
01:15:21,484 --> 01:15:23,691
Why should we
still try and do this?
2043
01:15:23,786 --> 01:15:24,856
Because I love you,
2044
01:15:25,221 --> 01:15:28,293
and just because shit is fucked up right
now doesn't mean you stop trying.
2045
01:15:29,959 --> 01:15:30,960
(SIGHS)
2046
01:15:31,660 --> 01:15:32,968
Deb.
2047
01:15:33,062 --> 01:15:34,370
Did you ever love me?
2048
01:15:34,797 --> 01:15:39,177
Or was it just some
really long one-night stand?
2049
01:15:41,337 --> 01:15:42,338
(SIGHS)
2050
01:15:45,074 --> 01:15:46,314
I don't know.
2051
01:15:47,910 --> 01:15:48,911
God.
2052
01:15:50,646 --> 01:15:52,182
(SAD MUSIC PLAYING)
2053
01:15:52,314 --> 01:15:53,315
(DOOR SLAMS)
2054
01:15:54,316 --> 01:15:58,560
♪ Same bed but it feels ♪
♪ just a little bit bigger now ♪
2055
01:16:00,856 --> 01:16:05,168
♪ Our song on the radio ♪
♪ but it don't sound the same ♪
2056
01:16:07,163 --> 01:16:09,040
♪ When our friends ♪
♪ talk about you ♪
2057
01:16:09,098 --> 01:16:12,409
♪ All it does is just ♪
♪ tear me down ♪
2058
01:16:14,003 --> 01:16:18,110
♪ 'Cause my hearing breaks ♪
♪ a little when I hear your name ♪
2059
01:16:18,507 --> 01:16:24,514
♪ It all just sounds ♪
♪ like ooh ♪
2060
01:16:24,914 --> 01:16:25,949
JOAN: Let me see.
2061
01:16:26,348 --> 01:16:29,625
Is there anything else
she wanted me to pick up?
2062
01:16:29,718 --> 01:16:32,858
Dining room table,
sorry excuse for a man?
2063
01:16:34,023 --> 01:16:37,402
Nope. She specifically said she
didn't want that shit anymore.
2064
01:16:37,760 --> 01:16:40,707
Oh, and by the way,
I know this sucks for you.
2065
01:16:41,564 --> 01:16:43,373
I feel really bad.
2066
01:16:43,799 --> 01:16:45,759
I bet you've been waiting
a long time to say that.
2067
01:16:45,768 --> 01:16:47,042
Way too long.
2068
01:16:47,103 --> 01:16:49,709
♪ I should've ♪
♪ bought you flowers ♪
2069
01:16:51,073 --> 01:16:52,984
♪ And held your hand ♪
2070
01:16:53,075 --> 01:16:54,955
JOAN: I'm so happy to have
my old roommate back.
2071
01:16:55,277 --> 01:16:57,279
Hey, um,
2072
01:16:57,379 --> 01:16:59,757
don't floss
after you eat all that.
2073
01:16:59,949 --> 01:17:04,557
♪ Never never get to ♪
♪ clean up the mess I made ♪
2074
01:17:04,987 --> 01:17:05,988
♪ Ohoo... ♪
2075
01:17:07,456 --> 01:17:08,958
You want another one?
2076
01:17:09,058 --> 01:17:11,161
- What did you just say?
- You want another beer?
2077
01:17:11,187 --> 01:17:12,160
What are you doing?
2078
01:17:12,228 --> 01:17:13,229
I'm asking if
you want a drink.
2079
01:17:13,295 --> 01:17:16,099
Why are you down here checking on me?
Why'd you leave them?
2080
01:17:16,154 --> 01:17:17,639
I'm working, they're good.
You want a drink?
2081
01:17:17,733 --> 01:17:19,576
- Do you see what's down there?
- Yes.
2082
01:17:19,635 --> 01:17:20,636
- Are you sure?
- Yes.
2083
01:17:20,736 --> 01:17:21,737
Let me see you
look down there.
2084
01:17:21,804 --> 01:17:23,010
Are we looking in
the same damn direction?
2085
01:17:23,079 --> 01:17:24,820
- Yeah, we are.
- Tell me where. What are we looking at?
2086
01:17:24,907 --> 01:17:26,477
Five pieces of pussy.
2087
01:17:26,575 --> 01:17:28,486
That's what we're looking at.
And you came down to check on me?
2088
01:17:28,577 --> 01:17:29,647
What the fuck do
you want me to do?
2089
01:17:29,778 --> 01:17:30,848
They're my customers.
I'm at work.
2090
01:17:30,946 --> 01:17:32,425
- You're Debbie-whipped!
- I'm not comfortable.
2091
01:17:32,481 --> 01:17:33,482
Dude, it's just like
being pussy-whipped,
2092
01:17:33,582 --> 01:17:35,357
except you're dealing with
one specific piece of pussy!
2093
01:17:35,451 --> 01:17:36,486
What do I want you to...
Listen.
2094
01:17:36,585 --> 01:17:39,589
I want you to fuck these bitches, Danny!
Damn it, man!
2095
01:17:39,655 --> 01:17:40,929
Dude,
if you don't go down there
2096
01:17:41,023 --> 01:17:42,263
and talk to these
fucking women, Danny,
2097
01:17:42,331 --> 01:17:44,106
I swear to God,
we are no longer friends.
2098
01:17:44,426 --> 01:17:46,048
We are no longer friends!
2099
01:17:46,962 --> 01:17:49,442
Now either you talk to them,
or you give me your face.
2100
01:17:49,498 --> 01:17:52,377
♪ I should've ♪
♪ bought you flowers ♪
2101
01:17:53,369 --> 01:17:55,713
♪ And held your hand ♪
2102
01:17:56,639 --> 01:17:58,016
The only reason
why I was promoted
2103
01:17:58,140 --> 01:17:59,501
was because of
this man right here.
2104
01:17:59,542 --> 01:18:01,488
He threw his job away on
a dream and a prayer.
2105
01:18:01,544 --> 01:18:04,991
To Danny, for dropping out, so
idiots like me can get ahead.
2106
01:18:05,047 --> 01:18:06,685
ALL: To Danny!
2107
01:18:06,815 --> 01:18:08,317
(INAUDIBLE)
2108
01:18:08,831 --> 01:18:10,871
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
2109
01:18:14,530 --> 01:18:15,531
(BARKS)
Hey!
2110
01:18:15,624 --> 01:18:17,831
Oh, sorry about that.
What a cute dog.
2111
01:18:17,893 --> 01:18:18,963
Thanks.
2112
01:18:19,128 --> 01:18:20,288
He must take after his daddy.
2113
01:18:20,296 --> 01:18:22,902
♪ I'll be the first to say ♪
2114
01:18:22,998 --> 01:18:26,536
♪ That I was wrong ♪
2115
01:18:26,635 --> 01:18:28,478
- I can't.
- What?
2116
01:18:28,537 --> 01:18:30,517
I'm thinking of someone else.
2117
01:18:30,573 --> 01:18:31,847
You're really...
2118
01:18:31,974 --> 01:18:33,715
Shh. Nice.
2119
01:18:33,809 --> 01:18:35,379
Have a good evening.
2120
01:18:36,412 --> 01:18:39,018
JOAN: All I'm saying is
you can't be so picky.
2121
01:18:39,081 --> 01:18:40,560
I mean,
no one is gonna be Danny.
2122
01:18:40,649 --> 01:18:42,094
But you had Danny
and now you don't want him.
2123
01:18:42,184 --> 01:18:44,164
When you had it good,
even if it went bad,
2124
01:18:44,253 --> 01:18:46,199
you can't go
back to faking it.
2125
01:18:46,255 --> 01:18:48,030
Honey, I get it. I get it.
2126
01:18:48,090 --> 01:18:49,262
Are you seeing someone?
2127
01:18:49,391 --> 01:18:50,529
No, why?
2128
01:18:50,593 --> 01:18:51,833
I don't know,
it just looks like
2129
01:18:51,894 --> 01:18:53,294
you gained some
relationship weight.
2130
01:18:56,198 --> 01:18:57,199
(BEEPING RAPIDLY)
2131
01:18:59,568 --> 01:19:00,569
BERNIE: Mmm.
2132
01:19:00,669 --> 01:19:03,616
So you didn't close? You leave a
classy chick like that hanging?
2133
01:19:03,706 --> 01:19:06,277
- No, man, classy?
- I picked her up at a dog park, man.
2134
01:19:06,375 --> 01:19:07,581
I'm sorry, Danny.
2135
01:19:07,676 --> 01:19:08,950
Hey, real quick, did
I miss the wealth
2136
01:19:09,078 --> 01:19:10,386
of black-tie events
you've been attending?
2137
01:19:10,546 --> 01:19:11,627
What are you talking about?
2138
01:19:11,680 --> 01:19:13,125
I don't know, I don't know.
I don't know what happened.
2139
01:19:13,215 --> 01:19:16,196
Look at me. You gotta move on, man.
That's crazy.
2140
01:19:16,418 --> 01:19:18,605
Yeah. You know what,
speaking of which,
2141
01:19:18,762 --> 01:19:19,893
should I go before
Keller gets back?
2142
01:19:19,955 --> 01:19:21,127
- No, stop it. You're fine.
- You sure?
2143
01:19:21,223 --> 01:19:22,258
Yes, you're fine.
2144
01:19:22,358 --> 01:19:25,100
Hey, you know I could probably
get you your job back here.
2145
01:19:25,194 --> 01:19:26,571
Now that I've got major
string-pulling abilities.
2146
01:19:26,695 --> 01:19:27,696
I'm good.
2147
01:19:27,763 --> 01:19:30,607
I can tell you're good.
Passing up perfectly good dog park pussy!
2148
01:19:30,699 --> 01:19:31,700
Hey, you know what?
2149
01:19:31,767 --> 01:19:32,768
There is something
you can do for me.
2150
01:19:32,868 --> 01:19:35,439
If you're willing to pull
those, you know, strings.
2151
01:19:35,704 --> 01:19:36,774
What do you need?
2152
01:19:36,872 --> 01:19:37,873
What is that?
2153
01:19:38,974 --> 01:19:40,419
Puppets. Strings.
2154
01:19:40,476 --> 01:19:42,717
Puppet master.
That's puppets...
2155
01:19:43,112 --> 01:19:44,455
Controlling it.
2156
01:19:44,546 --> 01:19:45,820
You need some ice, don't you?
2157
01:19:45,914 --> 01:19:46,915
No, I...
2158
01:19:46,982 --> 01:19:48,393
(FEEDBACK WHINING)
Uh... (CLEARS THROAT)
2159
01:19:48,417 --> 01:19:51,398
(GROANS)
Amanda, be a doll, please, and bring
2160
01:19:51,453 --> 01:19:53,831
a cup of ice in
here and some napkins.
2161
01:19:54,089 --> 01:19:55,329
Thank you.
(BEEPS)
2162
01:19:55,491 --> 01:19:56,993
Moving up in the chain.
2163
01:19:57,126 --> 01:19:58,127
(CRUNCHING)
2164
01:19:59,161 --> 01:20:00,799
CASEY: You got something to say?
Say it.
2165
01:20:00,896 --> 01:20:02,102
All right.
(CLEARS THROAT)
2166
01:20:02,164 --> 01:20:04,508
You ever thought about doing a little
something extra with this place?
2167
01:20:04,600 --> 01:20:05,880
Like what?
You say karaoke night,
2168
01:20:05,901 --> 01:20:07,073
I'm gonna punch
you in the face.
2169
01:20:07,136 --> 01:20:11,482
Okay. Like, turn the courtyard
into a beer garden.
2170
01:20:11,573 --> 01:20:15,180
Maybe get some patio dining going.
Expand the menu just a smidge.
2171
01:20:15,277 --> 01:20:16,688
Of course I've
thought about it.
2172
01:20:16,779 --> 01:20:18,417
You know what it costs
to do something like that?
2173
01:20:18,480 --> 01:20:19,788
I have some savings.
Yeah.
2174
01:20:19,848 --> 01:20:21,953
I can get Bernie to help out
on the supply side.
2175
01:20:22,048 --> 01:20:24,128
But why not take out a second
mortgage on this place,
2176
01:20:24,153 --> 01:20:25,291
put some real money in here?
2177
01:20:25,354 --> 01:20:27,794
Now you're talking like you're
gonna stick around for a while.
2178
01:20:28,123 --> 01:20:29,124
And if I did?
2179
01:20:29,191 --> 01:20:30,363
I'd call the bank today.
2180
01:20:31,527 --> 01:20:33,165
Call the bank.
Oh, yeah.
2181
01:20:35,597 --> 01:20:36,598
(KNOCKING)
2182
01:20:36,699 --> 01:20:39,942
Bernie. Come on, man, we gotta
get this stuff to the bar, baby.
2183
01:20:40,269 --> 01:20:42,875
Can't steal shit
without the puppet master.
2184
01:20:43,339 --> 01:20:45,148
(INDISTINCT TALKING AND SCREAMING)
2185
01:20:47,443 --> 01:20:48,649
Bernie?
2186
01:20:49,712 --> 01:20:50,713
Oh, shit.
2187
01:20:50,779 --> 01:20:52,019
- (CLUCKING)
- Making that thing cluck, ain't you?
2188
01:20:52,114 --> 01:20:53,115
Sorry, man.
2189
01:20:53,182 --> 01:20:55,059
What you doing?
Why you stopping?
2190
01:20:55,150 --> 01:20:56,288
Sorry.
2191
01:20:56,352 --> 01:20:58,662
Oh, Danny Boy. Fuck a baby!
2192
01:20:58,721 --> 01:21:00,029
Yo, is it 3:00 already?
2193
01:21:00,122 --> 01:21:01,192
Hey, man! Close the door!
2194
01:21:01,323 --> 01:21:02,393
Oh, yeah, right. My bad.
2195
01:21:02,858 --> 01:21:04,565
WOMAN: On the other
side, you asshole!
2196
01:21:05,030 --> 01:21:07,271
Let me finish this off. No,
we're not finishing anything!
2197
01:21:07,296 --> 01:21:09,256
What you mean we ain't going to?
We gonna finish.
2198
01:21:09,331 --> 01:21:10,674
There it is. Erection's gone.
2199
01:21:10,799 --> 01:21:12,142
Why didn't you lock the door?
2200
01:21:12,201 --> 01:21:13,202
BERNIE: You show up
with a chicken mask!
2201
01:21:13,302 --> 01:21:14,246
JOAN: Did you want people
to come up in here
2202
01:21:14,336 --> 01:21:15,337
while I'm
wearing a chicken mask
2203
01:21:15,471 --> 01:21:16,506
and you're clucking and fucking?
2204
01:21:16,572 --> 01:21:17,812
BERNIE: Baby, calm down.
Baby, calm down.
2205
01:21:17,873 --> 01:21:19,714
- You told me you wanted to fuck a chicken!
- Joan?
2206
01:21:20,809 --> 01:21:21,810
(GASPS)
2207
01:21:22,311 --> 01:21:24,257
BERNIE: Hey, man!
Close the damn door!
2208
01:21:24,580 --> 01:21:25,923
(SNICKERING)
2209
01:21:26,415 --> 01:21:27,416
Are you gonna stop?
2210
01:21:29,051 --> 01:21:32,726
Are you gonna let me explain myself?
I'm serious. Can you stop?
2211
01:21:32,821 --> 01:21:37,668
Look, I didn't say anything to you
because this little situation
2212
01:21:37,726 --> 01:21:39,501
works for us, man.
2213
01:21:39,661 --> 01:21:42,232
Dude, you have no idea
how sexy this shit is.
2214
01:21:43,365 --> 01:21:45,538
We treat each other
like shit in public,
2215
01:21:45,601 --> 01:21:47,121
but then out of nowhere,
we turn around
2216
01:21:47,169 --> 01:21:48,614
and we fucking
like porn stars.
2217
01:21:49,271 --> 01:21:53,117
I mean, there's so much built-up
tension and energy, man.
2218
01:21:54,076 --> 01:21:56,556
Why do we have to do
what everybody else does?
2219
01:21:56,879 --> 01:21:58,517
I mean,
I feel like we could have
2220
01:21:58,614 --> 01:22:00,415
a relationship without
all that bullshit, man.
2221
01:22:01,683 --> 01:22:04,186
We didn't get it right the first time.
So what? Fuck it!
2222
01:22:04,553 --> 01:22:06,533
Honestly, fuck it.
2223
01:22:06,688 --> 01:22:09,259
Who says that we even gotta
get it right at all?
2224
01:22:09,358 --> 01:22:12,202
I mean, if you take
away all the conventions,
2225
01:22:12,428 --> 01:22:15,068
being in an honest
relationship is the most
2226
01:22:15,230 --> 01:22:17,904
freeing feeling
in the world, man.
2227
01:22:17,966 --> 01:22:22,210
I can be me by just being me, and
she can be her by just being her.
2228
01:22:22,271 --> 01:22:25,650
And when I'm with her...
Oh, my God.
2229
01:22:26,241 --> 01:22:27,641
There's no place
else I'd rather be.
2230
01:22:28,444 --> 01:22:33,393
When I'm not with her, that's
the only place that I wanna be.
2231
01:22:35,751 --> 01:22:38,095
You get it? Like, do you
understand what I'm saying?
2232
01:22:38,720 --> 01:22:39,721
Yeah.
2233
01:22:41,123 --> 01:22:42,568
Yeah,
I've been there, brother.
2234
01:22:43,792 --> 01:22:45,294
It's mind-blowing.
2235
01:22:47,763 --> 01:22:49,283
That's why I don't
like to talk to you,
2236
01:22:49,298 --> 01:22:50,504
you get all
sensitive and shit.
2237
01:22:50,599 --> 01:22:51,600
(SNIFFLES)
2238
01:22:51,667 --> 01:22:53,977
Hey, let me get two
Stranahan's. Neat, please.
2239
01:22:55,003 --> 01:22:56,778
I'm fine. I don't need no tap.
2240
01:22:56,939 --> 01:22:58,111
I'm good.
2241
01:22:58,507 --> 01:22:59,508
(GRUNTS)
2242
01:23:03,479 --> 01:23:05,015
I'm Bernie, baby.
2243
01:23:05,414 --> 01:23:06,688
You know me.
2244
01:23:08,250 --> 01:23:09,251
(SIGHS)
2245
01:23:09,451 --> 01:23:10,657
I love you.
2246
01:23:11,687 --> 01:23:12,688
Yeah.
2247
01:23:28,537 --> 01:23:30,346
CASEY: HDMI, right?
2248
01:23:30,939 --> 01:23:32,612
Hey, here we go.
2249
01:23:33,108 --> 01:23:34,109
Oh!
2250
01:23:34,276 --> 01:23:35,619
Great play. Oh!
2251
01:23:36,678 --> 01:23:38,817
Not the same as being there.
2252
01:23:39,214 --> 01:23:41,057
No, it's not the same.
2253
01:23:48,323 --> 01:23:49,859
Nothing is.
2254
01:24:05,807 --> 01:24:07,878
Super casual.
Come on, Danny, relax.
2255
01:24:07,976 --> 01:24:09,011
(LINE RINGING)
2256
01:24:10,178 --> 01:24:11,179
Deborah Sullivan.
2257
01:24:11,246 --> 01:24:13,419
Hey, stranger. How's it going?
2258
01:24:13,515 --> 01:24:15,017
I really need an assistant.
2259
01:24:15,250 --> 01:24:16,354
What's that?
2260
01:24:16,418 --> 01:24:18,022
You know what,
I kind of can't hear you.
2261
01:24:18,086 --> 01:24:19,861
I guess I got bad
reception in here.
2262
01:24:19,922 --> 01:24:21,333
Let's just talk over lunch.
2263
01:24:21,390 --> 01:24:22,698
You're not serious.
2264
01:24:23,325 --> 01:24:24,565
Yeah, lam.
2265
01:24:25,227 --> 01:24:26,228
(SIGHS)
2266
01:24:26,595 --> 01:24:28,541
Okay, um, look...
2267
01:24:29,565 --> 01:24:32,512
These last few months
have just been miserable.
2268
01:24:33,902 --> 01:24:35,711
I can't stand going out
2269
01:24:35,837 --> 01:24:38,078
or being at home
2270
01:24:38,907 --> 01:24:41,615
because, you know,
that reminds me of you.
2271
01:24:42,911 --> 01:24:45,357
I can't sleep.
(SIGHS)
2272
01:24:45,414 --> 01:24:47,451
Pacino can't sleep.
2273
01:24:49,451 --> 01:24:52,364
Everything's just kind of
falling apart, Deb, and...
2274
01:24:53,388 --> 01:24:54,423
Because I miss you.
2275
01:24:54,890 --> 01:24:56,426
I need to see you.
2276
01:24:58,026 --> 01:25:00,199
Actually, I want to see you.
2277
01:25:02,264 --> 01:25:03,744
If you just give me
one more chance...
2278
01:25:03,765 --> 01:25:05,108
Danny.
2279
01:25:05,200 --> 01:25:06,235
I know I can...
Danny.
2280
01:25:06,301 --> 01:25:07,371
Danny.
2281
01:25:07,769 --> 01:25:08,907
I gotta go. Bye.
2282
01:25:08,971 --> 01:25:10,075
No. No, no, don't...
2283
01:25:24,319 --> 01:25:25,730
(HORNS HONKING)
2284
01:25:31,035 --> 01:25:33,236
MAN: (ON TV) So the hemispheres
is on the affected side.
2285
01:25:33,261 --> 01:25:34,899
WOMAN: That's correct,
on the left side.
2286
01:25:34,963 --> 01:25:36,636
MAN: Which then is
consistent with...
2287
01:25:36,732 --> 01:25:37,972
No! What are you doing?
2288
01:25:38,066 --> 01:25:39,602
This is your first
vacation in three years,
2289
01:25:39,735 --> 01:25:41,271
and you spend it
with Hugh Laurie.
2290
01:25:41,336 --> 01:25:43,077
He's the only
person in the world
2291
01:25:43,238 --> 01:25:44,945
who understands me.
He's really smart.
2292
01:25:45,007 --> 01:25:46,281
You know why, Deb?
2293
01:25:46,341 --> 01:25:47,945
Because Dr.
House knows something
2294
01:25:48,076 --> 01:25:49,677
that Debbie Sullivan
has yet to discover.
2295
01:25:49,745 --> 01:25:50,746
What?
2296
01:25:50,846 --> 01:25:53,952
All the answers in the world
won't solve your problems.
2297
01:25:55,183 --> 01:25:56,491
Call him.
2298
01:25:56,585 --> 01:25:58,428
You know you want to.
2299
01:26:00,288 --> 01:26:01,426
And also,
2300
01:26:02,658 --> 01:26:04,035
I'm seeing Bernie again.
2301
01:26:04,126 --> 01:26:05,161
I know.
2302
01:26:05,293 --> 01:26:06,294
How?
2303
01:26:06,361 --> 01:26:08,637
Come on. I'm depressed,
I'm not stupid.
2304
01:26:11,133 --> 01:26:12,305
(TV SHOW RESUMES)
2305
01:26:12,434 --> 01:26:13,777
(JAZZY MUSIC PLAYING)
2306
01:26:17,172 --> 01:26:21,848
♪ I want a little sugar ♪
♪ in my bowl ♪
2307
01:26:24,980 --> 01:26:29,292
♪ I want a little sweetness ♪
♪ down in my soul ♪
2308
01:26:30,352 --> 01:26:31,854
Yeah, baby!
2309
01:26:32,320 --> 01:26:33,321
(THUNDER BOOMING)
2310
01:26:34,489 --> 01:26:36,992
♪ Oh, so bad ♪
2311
01:26:37,059 --> 01:26:38,060
(THUNDER CRACKS)
2312
01:26:38,393 --> 01:26:44,139
♪ I feel so funny ♪
♪ I feel so sad ♪
2313
01:26:46,968 --> 01:26:48,504
(CONVERSING INDISTINCTLY)
2314
01:26:58,680 --> 01:27:00,489
- Oh, don't hurt it.
- (GROANS)
2315
01:27:00,682 --> 01:27:02,423
♪ What's the matter, Daddy? ♪
2316
01:27:02,517 --> 01:27:03,518
(ENSUES)
2317
01:27:03,585 --> 01:27:06,259
♪ Come on ♪
♪ Save my soul ♪
2318
01:27:07,989 --> 01:27:11,402
♪ I need some sugar ♪
♪ in my bow! ♪
2319
01:27:11,493 --> 01:27:12,528
Ah.
2320
01:27:12,594 --> 01:27:13,664
I got it.
2321
01:27:13,829 --> 01:27:14,830
(GRUNTS)
2322
01:27:16,098 --> 01:27:17,099
(MOANS)
2323
01:27:17,199 --> 01:27:18,200
Heaven.
2324
01:27:18,667 --> 01:27:20,442
Ooh, Eureka.
2325
01:27:22,104 --> 01:27:24,464
DEBBIE: Wow, this looks great.
You guys really went all out.
2326
01:27:24,506 --> 01:27:26,008
Thank you.
2327
01:27:26,108 --> 01:27:27,610
Well,
it's a very special evening.
2328
01:27:27,709 --> 01:27:28,915
Are you pregnant?
2329
01:27:29,010 --> 01:27:30,717
What? Hell, no.
Come on, don't you say
2330
01:27:30,846 --> 01:27:32,587
no shit like that.
Come on, Deb.
2331
01:27:32,681 --> 01:27:34,201
I mean, if you
wanna have a baby, baby,
2332
01:27:34,249 --> 01:27:35,729
you know,
I'm for what you want to do.
2333
01:27:35,751 --> 01:27:38,095
So don't ever think
that's in question.
2334
01:27:38,186 --> 01:27:41,224
So, are you coming to my
birthday dinner next week?
2335
01:27:41,289 --> 01:27:43,565
Yeah. Is Danny coming?
2336
01:27:43,625 --> 01:27:44,797
He won't be there, Deb.
2337
01:27:44,926 --> 01:27:46,064
Invite him.
It's his best friend.
2338
01:27:46,128 --> 01:27:48,938
Me? Friends?
No, I don't have no friends.
2339
01:27:49,030 --> 01:27:51,442
Deb, you don't even know that about me.
I don't believe in friends.
2340
01:27:51,533 --> 01:27:53,444
Only thing I
believe in is Joan
2341
01:27:53,535 --> 01:27:54,896
and whatever
undiscovered mystery's
2342
01:27:54,936 --> 01:27:56,216
lying between
those legs of hers.
2343
01:27:56,271 --> 01:27:57,648
My God.
2344
01:27:57,773 --> 01:27:59,150
You look so
good in this light.
2345
01:27:59,374 --> 01:28:00,374
(MOANING)
2346
01:28:00,408 --> 01:28:01,443
(CLEARS THROAT)
2347
01:28:01,543 --> 01:28:03,614
Don't you mess around and get
into trouble on this table.
2348
01:28:03,712 --> 01:28:04,918
Stop it. You better stop it.
2349
01:28:05,046 --> 01:28:06,407
Don't get in trouble.
I'll lake it.
2350
01:28:06,648 --> 01:28:09,288
Anyway, it is my birthday
and what I say goes. Right?
2351
01:28:09,384 --> 01:28:12,058
Obviously. That's done. You already
know I'm on board with that.
2352
01:28:12,154 --> 01:28:13,292
- (PHONE RINGS)
- JOAN: Ifs the phone. I'll get it.
2353
01:28:13,388 --> 01:28:14,389
You got it, baby?
2354
01:28:14,456 --> 01:28:15,457
You guys start.
Yep. It's fine.
2355
01:28:15,557 --> 01:28:16,968
Girl, you look good!
Real good.
2356
01:28:17,092 --> 01:28:18,503
Bernie, stop it!
2357
01:28:18,593 --> 01:28:20,436
- (CHUCKLES)
- This looks so good.
2358
01:28:20,744 --> 01:28:24,195
- Shut up! Girl, look at me. Get the bag.
- What's this?
2359
01:28:24,312 --> 01:28:25,645
Listen to me.
The food is vile.
2360
01:28:25,767 --> 01:28:27,269
You hear me?
The bitch cannot cook.
2361
01:28:27,335 --> 01:28:29,645
Whatever you do, you do not
swallow the fucking food.
2362
01:28:29,738 --> 01:28:30,910
What you're gonna do is this.
2363
01:28:30,972 --> 01:28:33,646
You wait till she not looking, spit
it in the bag, get low. (POPS)
2364
01:28:33,742 --> 01:28:36,313
Put it in the fucking bag. After you
do that, throw that shit in the trash.
2365
01:28:36,411 --> 01:28:38,584
Do it fast, 'cause if the food eat
through the bag, she'll smell it.
2366
01:28:38,647 --> 01:28:39,785
All right?
You're not listening.
2367
01:28:39,848 --> 01:28:40,952
You don't give a shit
about what I'm saying.
2368
01:28:41,016 --> 01:28:43,155
Okay, I gotta die for it,
don't mean you have to.
2369
01:28:43,251 --> 01:28:44,821
You on your own.
I tried to tell you.
2370
01:28:44,920 --> 01:28:46,661
Here she comes.
Put the bag down.
2371
01:28:47,088 --> 01:28:48,328
(GROANS)
Telemarketers.
2372
01:28:48,423 --> 01:28:50,164
Oh, God.
Awful.
2373
01:28:50,258 --> 01:28:51,965
They just ring and ring...
Baby, you didn't eat anything.
2374
01:28:52,027 --> 01:28:54,473
Well, I'm waiting on you.
I'm not gonna eat without my baby.
2375
01:28:54,529 --> 01:28:55,837
Can you believe this one?
2376
01:28:55,931 --> 01:28:57,171
(ALL CHUCKLING)
2377
01:28:57,432 --> 01:28:58,604
Here, take some.
2378
01:28:59,371 --> 01:29:01,411
Before we do that, let's do
the thing before we eat.
2379
01:29:01,436 --> 01:29:02,437
What thing?
2380
01:29:02,504 --> 01:29:04,144
This is time for our
special announcement.
2381
01:29:04,206 --> 01:29:05,810
(CLEARS THROAT)
It is.
2382
01:29:06,708 --> 01:29:09,689
I would like to take this time
to propose a toast.
2383
01:29:09,778 --> 01:29:12,691
Now, I don't know to what extent
you and Joan have talked about
2384
01:29:12,781 --> 01:29:15,728
the magic that's been going on
in our relationship.
2385
01:29:15,817 --> 01:29:16,852
Magic?
2386
01:29:16,952 --> 01:29:18,352
Lei him finish.
He wants to do this.
2387
01:29:18,353 --> 01:29:20,458
Baby, that's not true.
Okay, I don't want to do it.
2388
01:29:20,522 --> 01:29:22,602
I'm doing it because we
agreed that I'm better at it.
2389
01:29:22,624 --> 01:29:23,967
No. We didn't.
2390
01:29:24,125 --> 01:29:25,468
Yes, we did.
2391
01:29:25,527 --> 01:29:26,528
No.
2392
01:29:26,628 --> 01:29:28,539
Yes. You were worried about
how she was going to take it.
2393
01:29:28,630 --> 01:29:30,007
I said it's about
the presentation.
2394
01:29:30,065 --> 01:29:32,204
No, I said that
because I'm the one with her,
2395
01:29:32,300 --> 01:29:34,337
that I see her upset
and crying all the time.
2396
01:29:34,402 --> 01:29:36,006
No, baby. That's a lie.
You were the one talking about
2397
01:29:36,071 --> 01:29:37,550
she gonna slit her
wrists and all this shit.
2398
01:29:37,639 --> 01:29:39,676
Hey, hey!
I'm moving out.
2399
01:29:39,741 --> 01:29:41,379
Okay?
No.
2400
01:29:41,476 --> 01:29:43,183
Yes.
Yeah.
2401
01:29:43,245 --> 01:29:44,246
Yeah.
2402
01:29:44,346 --> 01:29:45,347
No. No. What?
2403
01:29:45,413 --> 01:29:47,484
I found a place. I'm moving
out end of the month.
2404
01:29:47,549 --> 01:29:49,153
- You're not mad?
- No! Of course not.
2405
01:29:49,217 --> 01:29:50,252
Thank you so much,
2406
01:29:50,352 --> 01:29:53,060
because if you were mad at me, you
know what, I would totally understand.
2407
01:29:53,154 --> 01:29:56,158
Because I gave you so much shit
about moving in with a guy.
2408
01:29:56,224 --> 01:29:57,362
And then, I turn around
and have Bernie move in.
2409
01:29:57,425 --> 01:30:00,269
Although, we were together longer
than you and what's-his-name.
2410
01:30:00,362 --> 01:30:01,500
Even though we
weren't technically...
2411
01:30:01,596 --> 01:30:02,700
We were together a lot longer.
2412
01:30:02,764 --> 01:30:04,404
We were, we were.
It was on. It was magic.
2413
01:30:04,432 --> 01:30:06,036
BERNIE: Yes.
And we were happier.
2414
01:30:06,101 --> 01:30:07,239
Their shit was fucked up.
It was fucked up!
2415
01:30:07,335 --> 01:30:08,678
And I said in the beginning
that wasn't gonna last.
2416
01:30:08,737 --> 01:30:10,011
No, no, no, remember
we had over and under.
2417
01:30:10,071 --> 01:30:13,052
You know, crash and bum. Crash and burn.
That's what we called them.
2418
01:30:13,174 --> 01:30:14,551
(BERNIE LAUGHING)
Oh, my God.
2419
01:30:14,609 --> 01:30:16,748
Okay, okay, okay. I get it.
2420
01:30:16,845 --> 01:30:18,756
It's cool, I just didn't think
you were one of those girls
2421
01:30:18,847 --> 01:30:21,207
that drop your friends the second
you get some regular dick.
2422
01:30:21,249 --> 01:30:22,421
You got me.
Whoa.
2423
01:30:22,517 --> 01:30:26,363
(WHISTLES) Back up. Regular dick?
Ain't nothing regular about my dick.
2424
01:30:26,421 --> 01:30:28,128
My dick is
completely irregular.
2425
01:30:28,256 --> 01:30:29,929
Okay, let's set
that record straight.
2426
01:30:30,025 --> 01:30:31,665
You got him started.
I give it two months.
2427
01:30:31,693 --> 01:30:33,468
Hey, before we drink,
so, like, what
2428
01:30:33,595 --> 01:30:35,370
are we talking about
with you being out?
2429
01:30:35,430 --> 01:30:36,431
JOAN: No rush.
2430
01:30:36,531 --> 01:30:37,475
But let's put a number to it.
2431
01:30:37,565 --> 01:30:39,045
It's the 10th,
so you're talking 13...
2432
01:30:39,100 --> 01:30:40,943
This month has 30 or 31...
Thirty-one days.
2433
01:30:41,036 --> 01:30:42,037
That's gonna be crazy.
2434
01:30:42,103 --> 01:30:43,104
If it's 13, it's okay.
2435
01:30:43,204 --> 01:30:44,911
To you guys!
Thank you.
2436
01:30:44,973 --> 01:30:47,544
Oh, man. Butt-naked
running around the house.
2437
01:30:47,609 --> 01:30:49,953
(BOTH LAUGHING)
It's on! It's on!
2438
01:30:50,045 --> 01:30:51,820
Your food should be
right up, all right?
2439
01:30:51,913 --> 01:30:53,893
(PACINO BARKS)
How was he?
2440
01:30:53,949 --> 01:30:55,121
Great.
2441
01:30:55,250 --> 01:30:56,456
Hey, buddy. Hello.
2442
01:30:56,551 --> 01:30:58,462
He's getting really
strong and he pulls a lot.
2443
01:30:58,553 --> 01:30:59,657
Maybe you should get him
a harness or something.
2444
01:30:59,754 --> 01:31:02,462
Will do, will do.
Thanks for taking care of him.
2445
01:31:02,557 --> 01:31:03,900
Sure. I mean, it's my job.
2446
01:31:04,659 --> 01:31:05,763
So, I'll see you Tuesday.
2447
01:31:05,827 --> 01:31:07,807
Yeah. All right.
2448
01:31:09,631 --> 01:31:11,736
Nice dog Walker.
2449
01:31:12,100 --> 01:31:13,101
(CHUCKLES)
2450
01:31:14,302 --> 01:31:15,303
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
2451
01:31:17,405 --> 01:31:20,284
Hey. Danny Martin,
professional friend.
2452
01:31:20,359 --> 01:31:22,719
Hey, what you gonna do, man?
You coming 10 the Broadway bar?
2453
01:31:22,744 --> 01:31:26,089
Yeah, I'm just right around the corner,
man. I gotta walk Pacino home.
2454
01:31:26,147 --> 01:31:27,148
Well, hurry up.
2455
01:31:27,191 --> 01:31:28,992
Tell him Scent of a Woman
came out on Blu-ray.
2456
01:31:29,017 --> 01:31:30,587
That always makes him
take a shit when I walk him.
2457
01:31:30,919 --> 01:31:31,954
(BARKING)
2458
01:31:32,020 --> 01:31:33,090
Pacino!
2459
01:31:33,488 --> 01:31:35,991
Oh, hey! Pacino! Pacino!
2460
01:31:36,091 --> 01:31:37,331
(HORNS HONKING)
2461
01:31:38,593 --> 01:31:39,833
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
2462
01:31:39,928 --> 01:31:41,771
MAN: Out of the road, asshole!
2463
01:31:42,831 --> 01:31:43,832
Hey.
2464
01:31:44,165 --> 01:31:45,166
Hey.
2465
01:31:45,266 --> 01:31:46,267
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)
2466
01:31:46,334 --> 01:31:47,836
He's so big.
2467
01:31:47,936 --> 01:31:49,779
Yeah, he's all grown up now.
2468
01:31:49,838 --> 01:31:51,476
Yeah. I'll say.
2469
01:31:51,539 --> 01:31:53,541
I hope to be just
like him one day.
2470
01:31:53,775 --> 01:31:54,776
(CHUCKLES)
2471
01:31:56,778 --> 01:31:58,189
Are you going to Joan's?
Yeah.
2472
01:31:58,279 --> 01:32:00,350
You know, they told me you weren't
coming, so I wouldn't have...
2473
01:32:00,448 --> 01:32:04,487
No, it's cool.
I'm sure they couldn't resist.
2474
01:32:04,552 --> 01:32:05,997
You think?
Yeah.
2475
01:32:06,054 --> 01:32:07,965
I mean, old habits
die hard with them.
2476
01:32:09,557 --> 01:32:10,968
You look good.
2477
01:32:11,559 --> 01:32:12,560
You, too.
2478
01:32:13,895 --> 01:32:17,001
And Pacino looks
handsome and happy.
2479
01:32:17,065 --> 01:32:18,544
He's doing all right.
2480
01:32:18,633 --> 01:32:20,544
Good boy. Good boy.
2481
01:32:21,569 --> 01:32:22,741
Good boy.
2482
01:32:26,474 --> 01:32:29,387
I was just gonna take him
for a walk around the park.
2483
01:32:29,477 --> 01:32:31,650
You wanna...
I mean, I'm sure Pacino
2484
01:32:31,746 --> 01:32:33,885
would want to spend
some quality time.
2485
01:32:34,816 --> 01:32:36,056
Yeah, sure.
2486
01:32:38,553 --> 01:32:39,554
(SCOFFS)
2487
01:32:39,821 --> 01:32:41,198
She's not responding.
2488
01:32:41,256 --> 01:32:42,826
I think he's gonna
flake on me, too.
2489
01:32:42,891 --> 01:32:44,063
Wait, do they know we
tried to set them up?
2490
01:32:44,159 --> 01:32:45,502
Yeah, baby.
I mean, they're not stupid.
2491
01:32:45,560 --> 01:32:47,733
Wait, no, I take that back,
because Danny is a little slow.
2492
01:32:47,829 --> 01:32:48,864
Debbie ain't no
rocket scientist.
2493
01:32:48,930 --> 01:32:51,240
Danny might be in the top two dumbest
people I've ever met in my life.
2494
01:32:51,332 --> 01:32:52,743
That bitch barely thinks,
you know what I mean?
2495
01:32:52,834 --> 01:32:54,836
I think she spells
her name with one
2496
01:32:54,903 --> 01:32:56,507
(BOTH LAUGHING)
2497
01:32:56,571 --> 01:32:58,016
Dumbass couple.
2498
01:32:58,339 --> 01:32:59,682
Stupid as fuck. Right?
2499
01:32:59,741 --> 01:33:01,220
That's why I
feel so bad, because
2500
01:33:01,342 --> 01:33:02,787
who else is
gonna be with them?
2501
01:33:02,877 --> 01:33:04,288
I mean, they're dumb.
That's true.
2502
01:33:04,379 --> 01:33:05,414
When you got two
people that dumb,
2503
01:33:05,513 --> 01:33:06,514
they gotta stay together.
2504
01:33:06,581 --> 01:33:08,117
That's true. You know what,
I think it takes us down,
2505
01:33:08,216 --> 01:33:09,817
hanging around them
the way that we were.
2506
01:33:09,884 --> 01:33:14,230
I felt that. I felt muted. My whole
time, I felt like I thought for her.
2507
01:33:14,289 --> 01:33:15,393
That's crazy,
'cause I swear I had
2508
01:33:15,523 --> 01:33:16,627
the same thing.
I remember one time,
2509
01:33:16,724 --> 01:33:17,930
Danny was talking
and I'm looking at him
2510
01:33:18,059 --> 01:33:19,299
while he talking
and I'm like...
2511
01:33:19,360 --> 01:33:20,520
I daydream when Debbie talks.
2512
01:33:20,528 --> 01:33:21,598
It's like
something else is going on.
2513
01:33:21,696 --> 01:33:23,471
That's what I try to do.
Ignorance.
2514
01:33:23,565 --> 01:33:25,704
And that is why I feel awful.
I mean,
2515
01:33:25,800 --> 01:33:27,939
you know, they keep
avoiding each other.
2516
01:33:28,036 --> 01:33:29,413
Yeah.
2517
01:33:29,537 --> 01:33:30,948
Dodging each other.
They were so in love.
2518
01:33:31,039 --> 01:33:32,575
That's how it is sometimes,
though. You know that.
2519
01:33:32,640 --> 01:33:33,640
I know, I hate...
2520
01:33:33,708 --> 01:33:35,278
Happy Birthday!
Uh-oh. There we go.
2521
01:33:35,376 --> 01:33:37,413
Wait a minute,
baby, is this cake chocolate?
2522
01:33:37,479 --> 01:33:40,289
Chocolate cake, chocolate
icing, chocolate filling.
2523
01:33:40,381 --> 01:33:41,621
Yeah, but I'm
allergic to chocolate.
2524
01:33:41,716 --> 01:33:42,990
I know.
2525
01:33:43,084 --> 01:33:44,722
(ROMANTIC MUSIC CONTINUES)
2526
01:33:46,121 --> 01:33:47,156
I fucking love you.
2527
01:33:49,491 --> 01:33:51,937
Did you just say,
"I love you“?"
2528
01:33:51,993 --> 01:33:53,904
No, I didn't finish my
sentence, is what I did.
2529
01:33:53,962 --> 01:33:55,168
Yes, you did.
2530
01:33:55,221 --> 01:33:58,141
I said I fucking love, and I was about
10 say something on the back of it.
2531
01:33:58,166 --> 01:33:59,611
Bernie, you are such a girl.
2532
01:33:59,667 --> 01:34:01,578
Whatever.
I do love you.
2533
01:34:01,636 --> 01:34:02,637
Better love me.
2534
01:34:02,737 --> 01:34:05,809
You can break my heart if you want to.
Love you, too.
2535
01:34:09,310 --> 01:34:10,350
(ROMANTIC MUSIC CONTINUES)
2536
01:34:10,411 --> 01:34:11,412
Listen.
2537
01:34:11,679 --> 01:34:12,680
I am, uh...
2538
01:34:14,415 --> 01:34:15,416
I'm sorry
2539
01:34:17,085 --> 01:34:18,496
for everything.
2540
01:34:19,821 --> 01:34:20,822
Truly.
2541
01:34:21,256 --> 01:34:22,257
Me, too.
2542
01:34:24,125 --> 01:34:26,605
And I'm glad
you're doing so well.
2543
01:34:26,661 --> 01:34:27,935
You, too.
2544
01:34:28,930 --> 01:34:33,504
I think we're just
gonna stay in tonight,
2545
01:34:33,601 --> 01:34:37,276
so you should go have a good
time with Bernie and Joan and...
2546
01:34:38,873 --> 01:34:40,113
I think I Will.
2547
01:34:44,879 --> 01:34:46,324
Do you wanna, um,
2548
01:34:48,650 --> 01:34:50,960
go out sometime?
2549
01:34:51,719 --> 01:34:52,720
Yeah.
2550
01:34:54,322 --> 01:34:56,962
Yeah. We should catch up.
2551
01:35:00,628 --> 01:35:02,835
We're gonna do once
more around the block.
2552
01:35:04,132 --> 01:35:05,304
Do you wanna join us?
2553
01:35:05,567 --> 01:35:08,309
Yeah. I think I will.
2554
01:35:08,736 --> 01:35:09,737
Yeah?
2555
01:35:09,837 --> 01:35:10,872
Yeah.
2556
01:35:11,973 --> 01:35:12,974
(CHUCKLES)
2557
01:35:14,876 --> 01:35:17,755
♪ This time I want it all ♪
2558
01:35:18,646 --> 01:35:21,820
♪ I'm showing you ♪
♪ all the cards ♪
2559
01:35:22,817 --> 01:35:24,228
♪ Giving you... ♪
2560
01:35:24,319 --> 01:35:26,731
Pacino, let's go.
2561
01:35:26,921 --> 01:35:29,697
♪ This time ♪
♪ I'll take the chance ♪
2562
01:35:30,658 --> 01:35:33,605
♪ This time I'll be your man ♪
2563
01:35:34,596 --> 01:35:38,203
♪ I can be all you need ♪
2564
01:35:38,499 --> 01:35:39,739
♪ This time it's all... ♪
2565
01:35:39,834 --> 01:35:40,834
JOAN: Let's make a toast.
2566
01:35:40,868 --> 01:35:42,074
What are we toasting to?
2567
01:35:42,170 --> 01:35:43,945
To Danny and Debbie.
2568
01:35:44,038 --> 01:35:45,108
Okay.
2569
01:35:45,206 --> 01:35:46,742
May we never end up like them.
2570
01:35:46,841 --> 01:35:48,377
Okay.
I'm not trying to do that.
2571
01:35:48,443 --> 01:35:50,081
Mmm-mmm. That shit
is jacked up.
2572
01:35:50,178 --> 01:35:51,919
I'd take you out.
Oh, yeah.
2573
01:35:52,013 --> 01:35:54,926
I'd cut off your oxygen, that shit happen.
I'll make you suffer.
2574
01:35:55,016 --> 01:35:56,256
You gonna cut off my oxygen?
2575
01:35:56,351 --> 01:35:57,853
Don't fuck with me, Bernie.
2576
01:35:58,019 --> 01:35:59,464
I'll take your lips off,
feed it to the clog.
2577
01:35:59,554 --> 01:36:00,794
I'm gonna take your
teeth out one by one.
2578
01:36:00,888 --> 01:36:01,928
I'll cut your nipples off.
2579
01:36:02,023 --> 01:36:05,129
I bet I'd sew your balls together,
like one. You're gonna have one nut.
2580
01:36:05,226 --> 01:36:06,866
You're gonna leave me
with a punching bag?
2581
01:36:06,928 --> 01:36:08,271
One-nut Bernie.
2582
01:36:08,363 --> 01:36:09,364
(BOTH LAUGHING)
2583
01:36:11,966 --> 01:36:14,776
♪ This time I want it all ♪
2584
01:36:15,870 --> 01:36:18,646
♪ This time I want it all ♪
2585
01:36:19,807 --> 01:36:23,380
♪ I'm showing you ♪
♪ all the cards ♪
2586
01:36:23,645 --> 01:36:27,218
♪ Giving you all my heart ♪
2587
01:36:27,582 --> 01:36:30,722
♪ This time ♪
♪ I'll take the chance ♪
2588
01:36:31,619 --> 01:36:34,930
♪ This time I'll be your man ♪
2589
01:36:35,456 --> 01:36:38,960
♪ I can be all you need ♪
2590
01:36:39,594 --> 01:36:43,132
♪ This time it's all of me ♪
2591
01:36:47,402 --> 01:36:50,906
♪ All of me ♪
2592
01:36:52,240 --> 01:36:54,652
♪ Yeah, ooh ♪
2593
01:37:05,086 --> 01:37:07,191
(FUNK MUSIC PLAYING)
2594
01:37:07,391 --> 01:37:09,232
SUBS by THIWANKA...
Converted sub/idx to srt.
2595
01:37:09,332 --> 01:37:14,332
http://subscene.com/u/659433
Improved by: @Ivandrofly188706
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