All language subtitles for Thats the Idea Man (2023).srt - eng(2)

Interviewer: Light bulb, wheel,

airplane, flying car.

[gentle music playing]

Growing up, I was always fascinated

with the world of tomorrow

invention that would take
humankind to extraordinary

new worlds full of laser guns and androids.

My father had subscription

to Gadget Times,

a monthly publication covering new designs,

concepts and products

that revolutionized the world.

I would spend Sundays afternoons

scrolling through the pages

wondering what it would be like

to live in the future.

One name would always pop up,

Gary Grossmont.

A man who was ahead of his time,

a futurist, a visionary, a man of intellect

beyond our imaginations.

[gentle music continues]

Years later, during my senior

year of college,

I needed a subject for my capstone project.

I reached out with lucky to set up an interview

with my childhood idol,

Gary Grossmont.

How would I describe Gary Grossmont

in the world of amateur inventors?

He was a legend.

Always energetic,

always working on the next big project.

No matter how many times he got

knocked down, he'd always climb right back

up, dust off his pants,

get back to work, and you know,

just never a dull moment.

Just always exciting to be around.

You could feed off

his, his energy and his optimism.

Yeah,

I never did mind the crazy ideas

that came out of Gary next.

Sure, I mean, you have your,

your Jobs,

your Musk, your Teslas, your Bells.

But Gary,

Gary was like Teslas and Bells before

they were Teslas and Bells.

It's like, you know, something was coming.

You want to get next to him.

Like, waiting for the next big reveal.

It was something.

The next big invention that
was going to change the world.

And you know, it's going to be big.

Bigger than Snappy Turtle

or Potato Peel, if that's possible.

Gary is the guy to do it.

Every day was like opening

a new present of ingenuity

from a Santa Claus of creativity

from the North Pole of imagination.

If it's possible to have two North Poles

because you can't replace

the original Santa.

Maybe they live in a duplex.

But he was Gary.

Something always going on in his brain,

always tinkering,

always looking on the bright side.

Gary Gary was full of life.

Today we say goodbye to a giant among us.

The Idea Man.

I've known Gary for about ten years.

I met him at the Innovator Conference in Fort Worth.

I can see a couple of innovators here.

To be honest,

when I first met Gary, I didn’t like him.

He wasn't that approachable.

Not that he was an asshole.

It's just that he's.

Well, he's Gary.

Gary was in his own world.

We were lucky to visit that world,

and we often did.

I’d often help out with Gary's prototypes.

As we all know is often a risky

and dangerous business.

I was always worried about safety,

but he was doing what he loved.

And that's a life worth living,

even if it was cut short.

Every year I thought,

This is the year Gary goes.

Sorry, Gary.

But at the same time I thought,

he's going to live forever.

[birds chirping]

Does that make sense?

Be around like the sun or running water.

Or coffee in a can

there for me every morning.

Patent pending.

I've come up with a secret formula

of finely ground coffee in aerosol form.

All you do is

pop this up here when you want a jolt.

[hissing sound] Whew!

I am firing on all cylinders now.

Whew!

I am still working on the latte version.

Apparently the fats and the dairy don't

mist well

and have caused a few cases of infection.

Doctors are calling it milky lung,

but the coffee version is great.

Do you want to pick me up without feeling bloated?

Hate having to piss all the time?

Coffee in a can.

Have you tried?
Maybe vapes.

I don't think that would work,

but thanks for your input.

I'm still looking for some beta testers

if anybody's interested.

You have your mochaccino,

you have your espresso blend,

you have your spicy squash,

which should not be confused

with pumpkin spice.

This one's got jalapenos in it

and it'll really wake you up

and get the old bowels moving,

if you know what I mean.

So just come up,

grab yourselves a comment card,

let me know what you think.

Because I think that Gary.

Gary would have loved Coffee in a Can.

I'm going to miss that guy.

Can we all raise our rings

in a moment of silence

for Gary Grossmont,

one of the greatest inventors

that ever lived, well,

besides all the greatest inventors

that have lived throughout my lifetime.

But I am going to miss and love that man.

[gentle acoustic music]

Interviewer: I met with Gary at

his modest workshop in western New York.

That's pretty neat, huh?

I knew you were on my porch

before you were even on my porch.

Are we early.

We were scheduled for three on the calendar.

Come on in.
Come on in.

Welcome. Welcome.

That's Mary.

And you caught us right in the middle of lunch,

so let’s go up to my workshop.

Is this your workshop?

No, that's Mary's craft room

and her meditation room.

She's quick.

This is her movie room.

She loves classic horror films

and modern horror films.

She loves horror films.

[screaming]

This is the bedroom.

It's private.

A gentleman never kisses and tells.

Come on, let’s go to my workshop.

Sorry I had to get that down

before I forgot.

Where were we?

What is your most successful invention?

Well, I wouldn't say I'm living glamorously,

but this guy's paying the bills.

And then some.

Oh the butter ring.

Can we see it in action for the camera?

Sure.

Would you like me to butter too?

Sure.

Sure.

Naturally.

Once we saw money come in and we tried to expand,

we've got the.

His and her butter rings

and also the butter brass knuckles.

Of course, we're trying to rebrand these

because brass knuckles

are illegal in most states.

And you wouldn't want somebody confusing the two

because you wouldn't want somebody bringing

butter to a brass knuckles fight.

That wouldn't be pretty.

Pretty tasty, maybe.

Yeah.

Also, don't bring these things to the airport.

Those people take their job very seriously.

And so now you're on the next big thing.

Yeah, there's lots of projects

in the works and,

you know, lots of stuff

to work on over and over again.

But this new thing I have a lot of confidence

in, I think this is going to do really well.

What is it?

This is an idea

I have for an exercise machine.

You don't think the market's

over saturated with exercise

equipment already?

Well, I think that just means that the market

for exercise equipment is strong,

just like mine will make you.

See mine is different.

Because if you're first

and you're different, then you win.

But if you're second and you're the same,

you lose.

I suppose if you're not first or different

and you have a really good marketing team

that would also work,

or if it's really well

made, that could work too.

Mine is different, mine is different

because normally you would need weights

and rowing machine and a bike

and so on and so on.

And then you have equipment
everywhere taking up space.

But what if there was one machine

that, that engaged all your muscle groups

at the same time in a motion

that was very natural,

so you didn't even know you were exercising.

As natural as walking.

Walking.

Research.

Walking.

Is the mic in the way?

No, no, it's fine.

Hi, can you hear me?

Yes. Coming in loud and clear.

Thanks for letting us interview you.

Well, of course.

Is this going to make my voice sound small?

Sorry.

Microphone is so small.

No, Your voice will sound exactly as is.

That’s amazing.

Can you state your name for the camera?

Hi, I'm Gary Grossmont.

Welcome to my workshop.

Maybe one with a side compartment for floss.

That’s a good idea.

You see,

Gary is an idea man.

You got your idea men

or idea women, of course.

I'm a big fan of getting women into STEM.

Go, girls.

But your idea people,

they're the wild ones.

The cowboys, the rebels.

They're the ones who are really pushing

the boundaries.

And often people will look
at their inventions and think,

Wow, that's stupid.

Nobody's going to buy that.

But those people can't see the future

the way those idea people can.

They don't know because the idea people

are so ahead of their time.

Most common folk can't fathom.

Imagine the first person who saw the wheel

well, the other person,

not the inventor,

but the first person who saw the invention.

Here comes some guy down

the path with the wheel

that everybody thought was a witch.

But look at him now.

Change the world forever.

Now we have roller skates,

roller coasters and unicycles.

Gary is an ideas man, idea man.

A real inventor.

We actually nicknamed him the Idea Man.

Or Tim, for short.

Then you have your practicals,

your engineers of engineering.

These are the unheard of

in the inventors realm.

Whether there is a small change

in the production of something,

a small cog or gear that does such and such.

You never hear about it

or know these folks by name,

but large corporations do,

and they pay top dollar

for these silent warriors.

Yeah, these guys or girls

usually do very well for themselves.

Then you have your rock stars

who, in my opinion, are just marketers

disguised as inventors.

Not to say they're not important,

but they are more concerned

about selling the invention,

making it sexy and dazzling,

putting it in a pretty package

with pretty women or men

who are modeling it.

[piano playing] New from Saltch

the High Seas Sea salt Poseidon

featuring a moon phase indicator chronograph

and fine sea salt grinder,

all in a sleek and stylish stainless

steel polished case

with crocodile skin bands.

Whether sailing around the world,

braving the rough seas

or just a night out in town.

A watch for the Everyman.

Poseidon by Saltch.

Do you think I need a bit

more Argan oil or um

sorry, do you have any hairspray?

Interviewer: Sorry.

This is a documentary

we don't really carry makeup.

It's okay. I can.

I can get some. If.

If you.

You look fine.

Look just fine.

You look great.

Oh, okay.

So when did you first meet Gary?

Gary?

Gary Grossmont.

This is about Gary.

You told me this was called The Idea Man.

That man has never had a good idea

in his entire life.

Yes. Sorry.

We sent a mission statement

package to your assistant.

Did you not get it?

I may have.

But what good is an.

Assistant if they don't look through these things.

Beforehand?

Hey, Laura.

Yes, Mr. Lockbarrel?

Tell Laura she's fired.

Well, I don't understand.

Yeah.

Vance Lockbarrel and Gary. Hmm.

I best describe their relationship like

you ever build a volcano in grade school.

Of course you have.

Everyone has.

Well, Vance is like vinegar,

and Gary is kind of sweet, so he'd be the baking soda.

Is baking soda sweet?

It's soda.

So you put them both together,

and it's a violent reaction,

but also pretty cool.

It's like two forces

colliding together.

They've been rivals since grade school,

probably competing to see

who can make the better volcano.

Are you still willing to interview?

Our research shows

an extensive history with Mr. Grossmont.

Is that correct?

Well.

You're here

and they say any publicity

is good publicity.

So I don't know what they've told you

about our inventions, but

I mean, that's the thing.

Gary had ideas.

I have inventions.

Well, just the one.

But the point is.

They don't write about Tesla.

I mean, okay, so they write.

They write about Tesla.

But it's Edison who won.

I won.

Gary is a has-been.

No, a never-been.

Besides, while there.

Are some similarities

between our ideas.

They're completely different.

His was a butter ring.

Mine is a salt watch.

Completely different.

Is that ‘saltch’?

I always thought it was ‘svlatch’.

It's pronounced ‘saltch’.

The ‘A’ is just upside down

to represent a salt shaker.

It's not my fault you don't understand

my genius.

In my spare time,

I like to give back to the community.

So I run a little repair shop.

I fix vacuums and clocks and cell phones,

all pro-bono.

So here is a toaster that Mrs.

Jenkins dropped off and said

it's only toasting bread on one side.

And everybody's

so quick to throw something away

when maybe all it needs is like a screw tightened.

Or maybe it just needs to be rewired

or maybe the cords a little frayed.

Oh, maybe I’ll

check that.

Needs some work.

[acoustic music]

It's like the whole world is made of plastic

and everybody just keeps throwing everything away.

But if you throw everything away,

where's the value?

It's like you bought a piece of trash that's

just waiting to be a piece of trash.

Take this camera, for instance.

It's going to spend a small amount of time in your hand,

and then a lifetime in a landfill,

but with a little bit of love.

It's like as good as new

or it’s better than brand new.

Maybe.

It's always had this issue,

and after it's fixed,

it's better than it was before.

The key is to

try to prepare as much as possible.

I've spent years sketching in these books

before any of my ideas became reality.

It's good for me to work out all the kinks

before I start building it.

I've noticed you have a lot of sketchbooks.

Do you keep every drawing you've ever done?

Oh, yeah.

I never throw any of them away.

You never know when you might need.

To revisit something.

You know, now that I think about it,

I've never thrown anything away

except garbage.

Are they all sketches of inventions in these books?

Mostly some little drawings

tidbits of my imagination.

When I get really stumped.

I like to sketch inventions

from other inventors

like Galileo or Archimedes.

It really allows me

to get into their brains.

Before everything was documented on video

and to see what they were thinking.

At the time. Like

this is Icarus.

His dad, Daedalus made these wax wings

which are pretty neat.

And I guess I don't know the whole story,

but he flew too close to his son

and they collided.

And really got banged up.

You mean the sun? Yes.

And you know the story of Edison

shocking the elephant.

I don't know the whole story,

but it must take a lot to shock an elephant.

Do you think Edison was a trench coat person?

I always thought he wore tweed.

I think it.

Depends on the weather.

Did you know he had.

Over a thousand patents?

Amazing.

Here we are.

My wall of fame.

Some of these inventions

might seem so small, yet so significant.

True acts of inspiration,

dedication and ingenuity.

Here we have Grace Hopper,

pioneer of computer programing.

And here is Philo Farnsworth.

Television sets probably wouldn't

be where they are today without his contributions.

And Lewis Howard Latimer,

he helped pioneer the electric light bulb

and the telephone.

So if you think about modern technology,

things we use everyday in our lives,

it could probably be traced back to these three

right here.

Pretty relevant

history for your documentary, I'd say.

Interviewer: Also, says Mr. Latimer

improved toilets on trains.

Yes. Yes, he did.

And he died in Flushing, New York.

Flushing.

Are you okay, son?

Do I need to get security?

Sorry.

Sorry.

Would you consider these Idea men?

Idea men?

Visionaries.

People ahead of their time

with fascinating ideas.

What do you think?

Were you even listening to me?

Plus, one is a woman.

Let me tell you what I think about idea men,

a man named Tommy Fropper

from a small town in Kansas.

He had an idea.

He was an idea man.

He sent us a letter saying

that the government could
save millions of dollars every year

simply by reducing the size of the text

on our documents.

We print tens of thousands of documents every day.

So you can imagine how

that must really add up.

Sounds like a great idea, right?

Hey, Wanda.

Is this an ‘N’?

Or an ‘M’?

I have to do all of my parents paperwork now.

They're in their eighties.

Do you know how difficult it is

for people that age to read medications?

Sell by dates on food, ingredients,

in case of allergies,

All this stuff that's really difficult to read.

And we've only made it worse.

Change of address form five lines.

And they put it on the size of a postage

stamp.

Thanks a lot, Tommy Fropper.

You saved us a lot of money

except on glasses.

You didn't think about that, did you?

Idea Man.

[violin music]

Here's our own Hall of Fame.

World changing inventions?

My world.

Ideas that really put us on the map.

Here's a Potato Peel.

It peels potatoes

on electricity of Another potato.

If that's not genius,

I don’t

know what is.

Here’s Snappy Turtle.

I'm sure you've seen him mounted

on the walls of many cabins.

Hey, let’s see if it still works.

De, De, De,

De, De,

De, De.

Isn't that great?

Interviewer: Do turtles have thumbs?

It's a snapping turtle.

Sketching is probably the most important part.

You can really think about

what is and isn't needed

just by sketching out your ideas.

You can eliminate 90% of the problems

you might encounter.

This one was quite the workout,

and the breeze kept my nether

regions comfortable

working up quite the sweat.

[whistling]

Think I got it.

I think I've got it.

You worked out all the details?

Yeah.

These worked out the kinks

here to smooth over some of the rough spots.

Finally.

Finally finalize the concept.

I think we're.

Interviewer: Hang on, can we pause.

Rich, can you stop whistling?

A think it’s being picked up by the mic.

Sorry.

It's okay, Rich, From here

on out, it's nothing but smooth sailing.

So now it's time to take all

those ideas that were floating around in my head.

And then I written in journals

and put them in a more formalized document.

The blueprint.

But it's white.

Am I doing this right?

I'm sorry, guys. I,

I just need a minute.

Why is it called the Blueprint?

Where did that name come from?

Blue.

The sky is blue.

What does it all mean?

But buildings aren't blue.

Some of them are.

Not a lot of buildings are blue.

Sky is only blue half the time.

Maybe the guy's name was Bill Blue.

The page is blue

and the lines are white or off white.

No, no they're white,

but the page is blue.

Would a page by any other color

still be as blue?

No. Why not?

Pink or orange

blue.

Blue.

Blue,

blue.

So don't I feel silly?

They're called blueprints

because the copies were blue.

They were easier to read that way.

Did you go somewhere

special that you often go to think.

That stimulates your mind, clears

the cobwebs.

Nowhere in particular.

Any place secluded works pretty well

where I don't think

the shower works sometimes

or the sensory deprivation tank.

Sensory deprivation tank.

This is a sensory deprivation tank.

A great invention

from American physician John C.

Lilly.

It's a light proof soundproof

tank filled with saltwater

where you can just float

and let your mind clear all the distractions

that build up through the day.

Very therapeutic.

I think everybody should try at.

Least once

I have one at home.

It's a little smaller,

so peaceful and relaxing.

I think everybody should try it

at least once.

[inaudible]

What's the light for?

So people know it's occupied.

You don't always get things right away.

You design it, you test it,

you redesign it, repeat.

And of course you run into all kinds of hurdles.

Life is just funny that way.

And you won’t always come up

with a solution right away.

Sometimes it takes months,

you'll be drifting off

and all of a sudden an idea pop right into your head.

The brain is kind of funny that way.

Oh, excuse me.

I have to take this.

The Stolen Child by William Butler Yeats.

Gary, Gary.

We let this intellectual giant

have a moment of solitude.

It was important to interfere

with his creative process as little as possible.

[loud thumping]

[screaming]

While I was reading the

poem, I had sort of a hypothesis.

What if, when we sleep, our dreams

act as sort of a engine warmer

to keep our heart and lungs going

in a low state?

The heart and the lungs

need constant signals from the brain

or else they'll shut off and we'll die.

So what I did

was I created a sleep solution

to help me go into a deep rest,

a submersible heater to keep the water warm

and the sound of a human heartbeat

played at the volume of 80 decibels.

To recreate the in-utero environment

of our mothers wombs.

What happened?

I had a nightmare.

If your theory proved correct,

wouldn't it kill you?

Let me ask you this.

Is it worth living if we don't dream?

What?

Sometimes you have to put yourself in danger

to test your theories and invention.

It's all part of the process.

When did you meet Gary? Hmm.

Good question.

What was he like as a child?

What are you working on now?

I'm working on the model 1/18 scale.

Is the draft finished?

No, but I know what it's supposed to look like.

So I’m skipping that step.

Is that part of the model?

No, that's my neighbor's cell phone.

She just needed me to look at it.

Do you find it more productive

to work on multiple projects at the same time?

Oh, absolutely.

Have you thought about using a 3D printer?

What would I need 3D paper for?

Here you are.

Thank you.

You're welcome. Have a great day.

You too.

Hello?

[inaudible]

Nobody wants hand-me-downs anymore.

But I was excited when I got my dad's stereo.

Yeah, I've had to make repairs to it

over the years and,

you know, find the parts.

But that's an adventure in and of itself.

It might sound silly for

a self-proclaimed futurist

and inventor to hang on to these relics,

but you might say,

Oh, well, isn't that part of your job description

where you invent new things

for consumers to buy and yeah,

there's some truth to that, but

there's just something about having a toaster

you've had your entire life, that toast bagels

the way you want you want

and the right temperature for rye.

Don't get me started on English
muffins, all the nooks and crannies

have to be a toast scientist to figure that one out.

Save your money

for the truly amazing advances in technology

like flying cars, ray-guns

but don't shoot anybody.

Obviously we have to keep the economy humming

and people employed, but

there's got to be a better way.

Like a happy medium.

Something catches my fancy.

I'll give it a good look.

But many times these inventions

that are supposed to make our lives

easier, like the maps on your phones,

sure, they help, but how many more hours a week

do you need to work to afford this device?

That's not making your life easier

unless you're a professional driver.

But then you have to go to the store to pick it up.

That's more time

Then you have to sit on the phone

if you need customer support,

that's more time out of your life for this thing

that is supposed to save you time.

Now multiply that over your lifetime.

They say time is money,

but I say money spent equals

your life minus time.

The map in my car cost $5.

Well,

obviously this highway is new

and sometimes they have you taking rights

when you should be taking lefts

but that just gets the brain moving,

you know.

Sure, might look silly

when you get lost around the way,

but figuring out your way

makes you a little smarter.

So when you get there,

you're a little better for it.

There's nothing dumb about that.

Interviewer: Did you ever
think you'd have a famous son?

Who's that?

Interviewer: Gary.

You know, he has quite the following.

He's a bit of a celebrity.

Really?

Interviewer: Yes.

Maybe the most prolific amateur

inventor of our time.

He's been on the cover of magazines.

Oh, his little projects.

That's good to hear.

Interviewer: What was the first invention

your son ever made?

Hmm?

Would you like to see some pictures?

Interviewer: Uh, sure.

I think this was one of his first.

He did it in woodshop or shop class.

I forget what they call it.

It was a birdhouse.

Interviewer: That's,

That’s not really an invention.

Oh, I still have it in my yard,

and it still works after all these years.

Spring is the best time.

That's when all the birds

come back from the south

and find a surprise.

A little place

where they can rest their heads.

Inside the birdhouse that my boy built.

Interviewer: I don't think that really qualifies

as an invention.

Every kid builds one in wood shop.

Oh, I remember that shop teacher.

He invited us in

to tell us what an exceptional student

Gary was.

Gary Yeah, I remember.

Gary.

We don't do bird feeders anymore because of Gary.

Taught shop

23 years without an incident, then

Gary comes along and

I'm short three fingers.

Interviewer: What happened?

Bird feeders are what happened.

Interviewer: Oh, was there a shop accident, table

saw?

No.

No. Gary

thought he was going to show off,

little shit.

He knew that

I smoke cigars in the teacher's lounge.

Of course, just every now and then.

So instead of building a bird feeder

like a normal kid,

he built me a cigar cutter

shaped like a bird feeder.

I go in to check the hole for smoothness.

Next thing you know,

I'm getting shunted off to the E.R..

Interviewer: What happened to the other two fingers?

Well, I was trying to get the other ones

to get reattached.

I guess I should have known something

was up with the black power

cord attached to.

I ever see that?

Yeah, I remember.

Gary, you don't forget kids like that.

Smart kids, they come and go.

Bad kids, the bad ones.

You remember them in case you need to pick them

out of a lineup.

Then there's kids like Gary.

Kind of smart.

Not really bad,

but you keep your eye on them

in case they burn down the building.

Curious ones.

That was our nickname for them.

Interviewer: I remember
taking an IQ test in middle school.

Did Gary take one?

Yeah.

You know what?

And I bet you we still have it.

We keep everything

in case the police need it. See?

Oh, yeah, Here it is.

I remember this one.

He scored a little bit above average.

109.01

Interviewer: I didn't know
IQ tests went in to decimals.

They don't,

but he was kind of

right on the last question.

Like half right.

You know what I mean?

Sometimes there can be two answers

to a question.

So we had to acknowledge

that he was a little bit above average.

So we did

a little bit above average.

Interviewer: Surely the IQ test

was administered improperly.

Gary Grossmont, just slightly above average.

That couldn't be correct.

More like slightly above genius.

Thomas Edison and Churchill

did horrible in school.

But look at them now.

School was difficult for me.

I got pushed into a few lockers

my fair share of swirlies, wedgies,

bloody noses, black eyes.

And that was just in grade school.

Don't even get me started on high school.

But the thing I kept

telling myself throughout the whole thing

was protect your brain, Gary,

because that's the most important muscle.

Is it a muscle?

It doesn't matter.

It's more important than triceps

or biceps or forceps,

because in the long run,

survival of the fittest is not about

who's the strongest

or who can fight the best.

It's about

who can solve the problems,

out think their opponent.

That's the real asset to society.

I mean, the hawk can have his talons.

The bear can have his claws.

But we didn't get to where we are

by being strong or ferocious.

We had our wits.

Do you know Sun Tzu largely to be considered

the greatest military strategist

of all time?

Did you know he also wrote a book?

You know,

I don't think this was the first,

but I do remember this one.

He spent so much time on this one.

He called it a perpet... perpet, something.

Interviewer: Perpetual motion machine.

Yes, that's it.

[ding]

Cookies!

Interviewer: Really?

Are you sure?

I find it hard to believe

that someone of Gary's intellect

would try for such

a fool's errand as a perpetual motion machine.

Well, he was only nine years old.

Things that kids get into.

Interviewer: History is
full of charlatans and fools

trying to invent and sell

a perpetual motion machine,

one that produces more energy

than needed to operate.

It would totally violate

the first law of thermodynamics.

Any person with half a brain would know that

Gary's mom must have him

confused with someone else.

Boy, I never saw a

kid work so hard on something.

He'd get tired

trying to make that thing work

and he'd just go and go and go.

It had a crank

that was supposed to start the machine

and he would crank it

until lunch non stop trying to get a machine

that would run itself.

Then he'd have to take a nap.

He'd wind it up and up

and then it would run for a few seconds

only to stop.

I think it was supposed to run on magnets

or something.

What kind of kid asks for magnets

for his birthday?

At least it kept him busy.

He was always coming up

with something crazy.

He was like a hamster.

He go round and round but

never really going anywhere.

Two years he worked on this

till he realized,

well,

is he still doing it?

He didn't give up

not until he had to go to the hospital.

Interviewer: Was it tough

seeing your son in the hospital?

I got used to it.

One day

my mom told me about this drink Spornge.

It was like this orange sports drink

that NASA had developed for long spaceflights.

And you know,

there was these commercials on Sunday mornings

on the cartoons, and I would I'd see it.

I'd be like, I got to have it.

And so I'd ask my mom, mom pick up some Spornge.

And once she got it, I was hooked.

I mean, astronauts drink this.

It's got to be good, right?

So every trip to the grocery

store is like, Mom, buy some
Spornge or can I get some Spornge?

Please bring back some Spornge.

And I drank it non

stop breakfast, lunch, dinner.

That’s all I needed was Spornge.

That's me in the hospital.

Liver failure.

I think.

It turns out the astronauts ate

and drank things other than Spornge.

In fact, they didn't drink Spornge at all.

That was a myth.

And now I can't really see anything

that's shade of orange without feeling

a little nauseous.

He would spend all day in the shower.

That's where he would come up with ideas.

That's where he came up with the idea

for the per-pep.

Oh, something

he was all soaking wet,

comes out of the shower and says, Mom, mom,

guess what I thought of

Had never thought to bring a towel

to dry himself off.

That's.

Interviewer: I still couldn't abandon the idea

that Gary would try a perpetual motion machine.

Is he not the man I thought he was.

Was he a big giant fake this whole time?

Only morons try to make something

so impossible as a perpetual motion machine.

It wasn't even the invention

of science fiction.

It was something of complete fantasy.

Might as well try to breed unicorns.

It wasn't a perpetual motion machine.

It was a time machine.

Interviewer: A time machine!

That's so cool!

So do you know about the time machine?

Well, he won't let anyone see it,

but I've heard the rumors.

Whether it's possible or not,

who knows?

Maybe in the future.

All though.

It's weird.

If they have built in in the future,

why have they not visited us yet?

You know,

present it as a gift

or tell us something like the future?

Or maybe it's so far into the future.

They haven't gotten to this part yet.

And that makes you wonder

what events are so horrible

in the near future

that they have to go to that future first

but not visit us in our time.

Are they still working on it?

Makes you.

Think.

Yes, I've heard of the.

Time machine.

But get this.

It's in his basement.

I mean, how stupid is that?

I mean, what's the plan?

You're going to time travel to what

some other person's.

Basement

or worse.

Buried underground?

I mean, the thing is, you don't travel.

On an X or Y axis.

You simply travel through time.

I tried telling him.

You want to have this

in an open field or something.

But he says that he's not.

Building a time machine.

Denies it.

Interviewer: How do you know what's in his basement?

I have an appointment with something.

Interviewer: So there's a rumor of a time machine.

That's just what it is.

A rumor?

Oh, a ladybug.

I don't want to scare it.

They bleed from their knees when they get scared.

Interviewer: And that's in the basement.

Is that what you’re working on

in the basement, a time machine?

I don't want to get blood on my crops.

Interviewer: Is it true?

What?

Interviewer: The time machine.

Look off the record.

Interviewer: Sure.

I know what people are saying,

but I just can't say anything about it

until I have some proof, you understand.

Interviewer: So you are

working on a time machine?

Like I said, maybe there's a time machine,

but I can't say anything

until I have the proof.

Interviewer: What proof would you need?

Every time I use it, I am transported
somewhere, but I don't know if.

It's across time.

Interviewer: Still just that it transports,

that’s something right?

But does it transport across time?

Because it can't be a time machine

if it doesn't transport across time.

And I don't know what time it is.

Interviewer: What?

I can never find a calendar.

Interviewer: What are you working on now?

Corn.

Got to throw the little ones back.

Sorry, guys, This one's private.

I'll meet you upstairs in the workshop in a little bit.

Interviewer: Come on.

Let's see if there's a window.

Did you see it?

Did you get on film?

The time Machine.

The time machine.

Oh, my. God.

History is full of forward thinkers,

dreaming of the day,

of moving through space and time

to visit the past and warn us of Hitler

and other bad people or to the future

and see what we can't even imagine.

Is Gary the man to make this happen?

To move the human species

not in inches and miles

but in months and years,

we followed Gary

in hopes of getting more dirt

on the time machine.

Gary, Gary Grossmont.

Are you working on a time machine?

No, I'm mixing concrete.

Interviewer: For the time machine?

No, for a sidewalk.

Interviewer: But there's already a sidewalk.

A better sidewalk, Sidewalk 2.0.

It's going to revolutionize

the foot transportation industry.

Ever bump into someone?

Pretty annoying, right?

Well, today I put on my civil engineer hat,

and we're testing out a foot traffic idea

I've been working on for some time.

It's not really anything new,

but an improvement on an existing idea,

which is okay, That's

what it's all about, right?

Making life easier for everyone.

I call it ‘The Walk-Around’.

You’re doing it wrong.

Go around!

Go around!

The sidewalk roundabout needs some work.

You can't expect a user to know

how to correctly operate

something you know right away.

You have to show it,

with like a manual or an instructional video

because some things are very intuitive.

But if it's something

brand new that nobody's ever seen before,

you can't expect them to get right away.

Like, for instance, my father,

it took him several Thanksgivings

before he got the hang of the electric carving knife.

He would just be cutting right into that turkey,

just cutting right down the side of that turkey

until there was nothing

left but turkey crumbles.

We never really look forward

to Thanksgiving, to be honest with you.

It was the worst meal.

Well, the model is all done

just in time for Contraption-Con

or is a Gadget-Con?

They both exist.

I don't know why they have them on the same day,

but either way, it's the biggest event

this side of the Mississippi,

north of the Mason-Dixon Line,

east of the Adirondacks.

But it's a really great

event, were just walk around

and see the future of technology.

Lots of young folks attend, and it's great

to see them pursuing careers

in amateur inventurism.

Interviewer: Is inventurism a word?

I just invented it.

I tell the young inventors,

It doesn't have to be something super crazy.

Your first project

or your life career project.

One you work on your whole life,

it can be super simple.

For instance, take my tie.

It looks like a normal bolo tie.

Stylish, yet functional.

Well, one day I was walking and my shoe

kept coming off because the lace kept breaking.

I thought my tie is about

the same length and thickness.

I'll just replace my shoelace with my tie.

Sure.

I didn't look as well dressed.

What good is having a bolo
tie if your shoe keeps falling off?

So luckily I had my kipper tie as a backup.

So I'm walking

when wouldn’t you know it, my belt broke.

Well, I thought.

Good thing I have my kipper tie

also and I use that as a belt.

Voila.

The ‘Kiplo Tie’.

It can be a bolo or a kipper

or a belt or shoelaces.

Cut it in half and it's both

I made four

in case of emergencies.

Goodbye Mary, I’m off to Gadget-con.

These events

aren't really my thing.

I'd much rather be in the workshop

working on a project.

This marketing thing,

much to my downfall, is probably

just as important as the other part.

But I just don't

want to come off as a snake oil salesman

trying to promise

something factitious or undeliverable.

But I guess you know the old saying if

if you invent something

awesome in the forest

and it doesn't make a sound,

that doesn't make any sense.

If you invent something in the forest

and it makes a sound,

did you really invent anything at all?

No, that's not what I'm trying to say.

Communication's not really my thing.

That's the idea, man.

Can we get your autograph?

Absolutely young person.

Just because it's not my thing doesn't mean.

I don't enjoy the limelight a little bit.

Thanks idea man.

They always get a kick out of this one.

That's so cool.

All right, everybody move in close.

Sometimes it's the

simplest ideas that can be

a real breakthrough in making.

Your life easier.

See, you all inside.

That's weird, the door's locked.

Whoa, watch out for that banana peel, man.

You know how long until the convention starts?

We've got about 26 hours, give or take.

It's the 15th.

It's always on the 15th.

It’s the 14th, man.

Mary said it was today.

It needs some work.

The marketing.

It needs some work.

[loud sneeze]

Interviewer: Is rejection your greatest fear?

No, no. Rejection is

just something you have to accept

and learn from.

My greatest fear is

what if one day I wake up

and there's no more ideas?

I wake up, I brush my teeth,

I have breakfast and go about my day,

and there's no thought

other than what to do next,

what to have for dinner and what to watch on TV.

And my fear is that

it would happen the next day as well.

And then the day after that, that

the ideas no longer pop into my head

because it's frustrating as they can be,

they are what gets me out of bed

in the morning. What if that stops?

So I try to exercise my

mind, keep it healthy, active.

I read, do puzzles,

but what if it's not enough?

What if I develop Alzheimer's or dementia?

These are my fears.

I read an article

that said reading can help

with Alzheimer's and another article

and how we develop new
synapses every time we take a route

not taken.

And that really stuck with me.

That we can keep our brain healthier

just by taking a road we've never taken

before.

Well, I've taken all the roads

in my town, so I came up

with these goggles that display streets

from around the world.

So you believe you're

walking down Champs-Élysées

when you're really on Main Street.

Interviewer: Please say your name for the camera.

Mary Straussburger.

Did you not take Gary's name?

Afraid of being married

to someone famous?

No.

Afraid of lawsuits and harassment.

Can you explain?

I love my husband.

But someday

someone is going

to use one of his inventions,

and that person is going to be

seriously injured, possibly even die.

I need to protect my assets

from possible litigation

that may come.

I love him, but I need to protect myself.

Isn’t most of that money from
the sales of the butter ring?

No. Heavens, no.

We haven't seen a dime in years from that.

How does he fund his work?

Hey, Jerry, I'm.

I'm doing an interview right now.

Tell him I'll do 5% but no less.

Sorry.

I give him an allowance.

He asked me to take care of finances, so I.

I've been investing, buying properties,

mostly long term stuff.

We are recording this.

Gary watches the video.

And does he drift off?

Often stare into space,

start looking at the wall as

if there's a takeout menu on there. Yes.

Poor guy,

he is always thinking,

but never about any one thing

for more than a few seconds

and then he's off on another wild

dream of his.

Surprised he gets anything done.

He might watch the videos, but

he's thinking about the next big thing.

That's just how he is.

So yeah, basically

I loaned Gary the money

for his little experiments.

Well, if you're so worried about the safety

of his inventions,

aren't you worried about Gary

being hurt?

Yes.

I was always afraid of Gary dying.

But how do you stop

someone from doing what they love,

even if what they love is stupid?

Stupid, very stupid.

But you love them,

so you just

embrace it and hope for the best.

The thing I like the most about what I do

is the kind of jack of all trades aspect.

You know, every day is different.

Today I'm taking the day off,

but I wouldn't have to

stay till five to work on

something that wasn't coming to me, you know?

And I could work on something different

or a completely new project altogether

or I could take a nap and watch TV.

I tried the regular job route

for a little while, but

it didn't really pan out,

and I'm not sure that's

because I have that a attention deficit.

Oh, I should probably change this thing

or add a preservative to make it

so the butter's not so rancid.

Interviewer: When’s the last time you cleaned it?

You know, that's a good question.

I, I'm not sure I should write that down.

Well, I just thought of something

I like being able to focus on whatever's

holding my attention at the time.

I’ll be fine.

My body will heal

as long as my mind is intact.

[barfing sound]

I don't think you guys should interview

me today.

Do you want your lav mic back?

[car horn]

Of all of his contraptions,

the birdhouse was always my favorite.

Interviewer: Do you smoke cigars?

I don't like birds.

Do you think his inventions

will ever end up killing someone?

Oh, you don't know?

Know what?

Nothing.

Nothing.

Was Gary's father

an influence on his inventions?

[ding]

How could such dangerous contraptions

pass the test and go on

to obtain the prestigious U.S.

patent and enter the marketplace?

People could seriously get hurt.

How is this even possible?

Here he is

getting award for most patents submitted,

although none of them were accepted.

It was a bittersweet moment.

Kind of like a virgin Casanova.

Poor guy.

Interviewer: Wait, none were accepted?

Nope.

Not a single one.

Can't blame a guy for trying though.

Then why is he on

so many of your magazines covers?

He’s not, he's on the back.

Kind of like, Hey,

check out this stupid thing

for a quick laugh.

Kind of like a joke.

Like, Hey, look here, the stupid thing here

brings some humor to the magazine.

So Gary has never had a patent accepted?

Poor guy.

Is Gary not the man I thought he was?

Have I been reading magazines

backwards this whole time?

Gary Grossmont?

Yes, I know Gary Grossmont.

He's the bane of my existence.

No, I take that back.

I love Gary Grossmont.

He's the light of my life.

I used to hate Gary,

but now I enjoy rejecting his submissions.

I even made a special stamp for Gary.

This is the normal one.

And here is Gary's stamp.

You know,

if I don't see another Gary Grossmont

submission come across my desk,

then somebody should check my pulse,

because that either means that I'm dead

and they've pushed off his paperwork

to some other poor schmuck or he's dead.

And I'm fine with either.

The United States

Patent Office used to be a place of honor.

We have a wall of world changing ideas

that shaped our future,

our children's future.

And now we have a paper

wall of Gary Grossmont’s failed ideas.

I literally have a forest worth

of paper of submissions

that that man has sent over to my desk,

but at least he's probably saved

the United States Postal Service.

42 stamps.

You could mail a car with 42 stamps.

Nobody needs 42 stamps.

And thanks to Gary,

I no longer participate in the office

betting pool

because that's how I got every single

one of Gary's submissions, because I lost.

[birds chirping]

[chopping sound]

Interviewer: Did you know
that Gary doesn't own any patents?

That all of them have been rejected

by the Patent office?

Of course the guy is a hack.

I mean, not to mention dangerous.

I'm surprised the guy's still alive.

I mean, it's

it's like watching a guy

get kicked in the balls.

Which is hilarious.

But it's still just a

guy getting kicked in the balls. After the

20th time

it's just sad.

So you've never tried any of his inventions,

even the butter ring?

No, I don't have a death wish.

No one's ever died from the Saltch.

Aren't you facing several lawsuits

of wrongful death,

including famous Swiss rock

climber Sven Barriston,

who was climbing El Capitan free solo

when his saltch unexpectedly opened up.

I'm done with this interview.

If you want to talk.

You can talk to my lawyer.

Lawyers with an ‘s’.

Is that a Rolex?

Hey, Laura,

can I get security in here?

Secretary: This is Dave.

Laura no longer works here.

They say never meet your heroes.

I’m starting

to have serious doubts about my project.

Maybe Gary Grossmont

wasn't who I thought he was.

I’ll admit, it's mostly my fault

for not doing enough research

before filming my documentary.

I only know Gary from my childhood

as an inventor,

man made of myth and magic,

able to create ideas out of thin air.

Now, I wonder if he was just a false

idol all along.

A sufferer of delusions

of grandeur, an amateur

trying to punch above his weight,

only to be knocked out the first round

of every match.

Excuse me.

Waitress, may I have some butter, please?

Sorry, we just ran out.

Oh.

Wish there was a better way to carry butter.

[spacey music]

Was there still time to salvage my film?

Maybe I could interview

Vance Lockbarrel instead. Or

maybe someone with a patent or two.

Or maybe I should realize my own

feeble attempt at being a journalist.

Move on to a more stable realistic career.

Would that be my lesson from Gary?

Well, tomorrow's the big day.

We're taking the prototype out

for its first test.

It's kind of like when your child learns ride a bike

for the first time.

You teach them everything you can,

You steady the bike for them,

then you send them off into the world

watching them soar, doing

something they'll never forget,

or they crash,

break an arm and never want to get on a bike again.

It could go either way.

[upbeat music]

I think I see him!

There he is!

There he is!

Wow. Wow.

I feel like I just got ten years of the gym

in one single workout.

What did the watch say?

How long was I on for?

Interviewer: 4 minutes.

41 seconds.

All right, let's see how many calories

I burned.

652. That's good.

That seems good.

Is that good?

Is your arm okay?

Oh, yeah.

That just means the blood is flowing.

I'd call that a success.

Now, all that's left to do is submit that.

Let's.

Let's submit that patent.

Today's the big day.

Off to the mailbox

with my submission in hand.

This is the one. I can feel it.

I just got to drop it in

a mailbox and wait for the letter.

Could have sworn there was a mailbox around here.

[groovy music]

This is it.

Finally,

you know, I've done this a million times,

but it never gets old.

It's like a first kiss.

You just. Just kind of go for it.

I hope she won't reject it,

but I got a good feeling about this one.

She's not going to reject my kiss,

going to accept it,

and then we're going to grow old together.

Were going to sit on the porch
and think about the first time

we met.

This is it.

Rejected.

Rejected.

It's just

that was the fastest

It's just so frustrating.

They have this giant red rubber stamp.

It's just ridiculous.

No. Not just ridiculous.

It's mean.

Interviewer: Why was it rejected?

The patent already exists.

Their words.

What? Really?

Yeah, they said it's too similar to this here.

They sent a picture.

They call it an advanced
interrogation machine, which is?

They're banking on torturing prisoners.

It doesn't make sense, Right?

It's Not the same thing.

Mine was supposed to help society,

and there was just evil.

When did.

When did we stop evolving?

We could go so much further.

Just so much more.

How can we see?

How can we see, like if we're going to solve

all of society's problems,

We just have to take the price tag

off of everything.

I don't understand how we can see

astronauts in the sky

and lunar landings and just

other things in the universe

and not be putting all our resources towards

reaching further, towards touching new worlds.

I know that we could just

go further and do so much more.

I know that not

everybody can be an astronaut or an engineer.

I get that.

But we just have the potential for more.

How can we be so short

sighted as high functioning creatures

that we can see gods in the sky,

but not ourselves among them?

How can we not see ourselves

other than anything than torturers

and sellers of war?

I just can't.

I got to be alone right now.

What have I created?

Am I a monster?

Sure, Gary may have lots of misfires,

but every genius does.

How many little tunes

do you think Mozart wrote

before he was successful?

Probably dozens.

Interviewer: Actually,
he was successful at 17

and began composing in five.

Okay, well, Gary is like a five year old

trapped inside a 45 year old body

is just a matter of time

before he goes Mozart.

Deep down inside.

I’m rooting for the guy.

I really am.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe.

She had so many children

and love them all too.

She said ‘thank you lord, Jesus

for sending them bread’.

She kissed them all

gladly and sent them to bed.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe.

She had so many children

and loved them all too.

She said thank you lord Jesus

Hey Gary, what poem is this?

Boots.

Boots, boots, boots.

Moving up and down again.

There's no discharge in the war.

Seven, six, 11

I don’t think that’s right.

Come on, Gary.

It's not your fault.

[punk music playing]

[gentle music playing]

[tires screeching]

[crash]

[water splashing]

My nephew's been teaching me

how to Photoshop.

I made the whole thing up.

It's not that far off from the original, though.

It looks like torture device.

Gary Grossmont.

He's a torture machine on my soul.

When my great aunt died,

they gathered at her house

and they put all our possessions in it

in a big pile in our living room.

And my mother said

I could pick something out

to remember her by.

I never, never met her,

so I didn't really know what to grab.

But I went through anyway

and I grabbed her travel toothbrush.

And here was this thing.

It was it was so cool.

It was so simple, yet ingenious.

You just flip it around and it still works.

I guess I,

I guess I credit this as my spark of curiosity

because after it,

I started tinkering with electronics

and taking things apart.

But I couldn't forget about that pile.

All those items

with nowhere to go but the landfill.

And I just thought,

there's got to be a better way.

Interviewer: So what's your next project?

And as Gary's

last request, he wanted to become one

with nature.

Gary: Well, you wouldn't want an

urn that just sits on your mantle, does nothing.

So I invented the ‘Antcestry’,

which is a ant farm

that you can keep your loved one's ashes in.

It brings joy to an otherwise

sad event, a conversation starter.

I mean,

good home for the ants.

Kids can play with it

and maybe they'll become scientists themselves.

Get interested in inventing.

I mean, that's the idea.

Needs some work.