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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,810 Wow. 2 00:00:37,211 --> 00:00:38,560 Hi. 3 00:00:38,603 --> 00:00:40,170 - Hi! - Hello. Hi. 4 00:00:40,214 --> 00:00:42,346 - Hi. Hello. Welcome. - We're on a holiday. 5 00:00:42,390 --> 00:00:44,566 Ally and Paul, Paul and Ally. 6 00:00:44,609 --> 00:00:47,134 We're Ally, and they're Paul. I'm P--He's Paul. 7 00:00:49,310 --> 00:00:52,878 I had some Valiums, um, for the... flying 8 00:00:52,922 --> 00:00:55,620 and some Malbec, which is red wine. I like wine. 9 00:00:55,664 --> 00:00:56,708 Yes. 10 00:00:56,752 --> 00:00:58,319 - Okay? - Yeah! 11 00:00:58,362 --> 00:01:00,190 Okay. Uh, surname is Worsley. 12 00:01:00,234 --> 00:01:01,539 Sorry. Yes. 13 00:01:01,583 --> 00:01:03,150 - It's all right. - That's our name. 14 00:01:03,193 --> 00:01:08,329 Welcome, Mr. and Mrs. Worsley. I see you've booked three rooms. 15 00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:09,417 - Yes. Now... - Yes. 16 00:01:09,460 --> 00:01:11,114 I did email ahead about this. 17 00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:13,421 Uh, we were originally gonna be traveling with our two children. 18 00:01:13,464 --> 00:01:15,945 You know, they're called Ava and Luke, yeah. 19 00:01:15,988 --> 00:01:18,948 And Ava's doing some work experience at a biomedical lab. 20 00:01:18,991 --> 00:01:20,993 - Because she's very clever. - Yeah. 21 00:01:21,037 --> 00:01:23,735 And Luke is, um... 22 00:01:23,779 --> 00:01:25,172 - He's having a baby. - Yeah. 23 00:01:25,215 --> 00:01:26,390 But we don't wanna talk about that. 24 00:01:26,434 --> 00:01:27,957 Yeah, but, uh, anyway, I just wonder, 25 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,438 is there any chance of a refund on the two rooms? 26 00:01:30,481 --> 00:01:32,831 - Please? - Uh... 27 00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:36,008 I'm very sorry, Mr. Worsley, 28 00:01:36,052 --> 00:01:38,228 but the package you booked is non-refundable. 29 00:01:38,272 --> 00:01:39,925 Fair enough. Thanks for checking. Uh... 30 00:01:39,969 --> 00:01:41,275 - Yeah. - 'Cause I booked it 31 00:01:41,318 --> 00:01:42,667 18 months ago when things were slightly less, uh... 32 00:01:42,711 --> 00:01:44,495 - Bleh. - Yeah. 33 00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:47,890 Oh, what I cando as a goodwill gesture 34 00:01:47,933 --> 00:01:50,153 is upgrade you to our presidential suite. 35 00:01:50,197 --> 00:01:51,807 - Oh, my God. Thank you so much. - Oh, thank you. Thank you. 36 00:01:51,850 --> 00:01:53,461 - Presidential. - Hey, yeah. 37 00:01:53,504 --> 00:01:55,027 - Presidential. - You keep saying it. 38 00:01:55,071 --> 00:01:58,030 I hope it's Obama and not Trump 39 00:01:58,074 --> 00:02:00,163 or the Watery-gate one with the jowls. 40 00:02:00,207 --> 00:02:01,599 - Mm. - I didn't like him. 41 00:02:02,513 --> 00:02:04,428 Where are you... Okay. Right, um... 42 00:02:04,472 --> 00:02:07,866 Hi! Hello! Are you on holiday? I'm on holiday. 43 00:02:07,910 --> 00:02:11,131 Um... maybe send up some coffee or... or a drugs counselor. 44 00:02:11,174 --> 00:02:12,697 Hi! 45 00:02:12,741 --> 00:02:14,786 - Let me get you your keys. - Great, thank you. 46 00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:15,613 - She'll be fine, though. - Um... Yeah. 47 00:02:15,657 --> 00:02:17,137 I'll keep an eye on her. 48 00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:19,051 - Breakfast is from 7 a.m... - Uh-huh. 49 00:02:19,095 --> 00:02:20,662 - ...in the Odysseus Restaurant. - Okay, yeah. 50 00:02:20,705 --> 00:02:23,186 - Outside on our south terrace. - Brilliant. Thank you very much. 51 00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:24,666 - You're welcome. - Um... um... 52 00:02:24,709 --> 00:02:28,148 Hi! I'm Ally. Oh! That is... 53 00:02:31,238 --> 00:02:33,631 Oh, shit. 54 00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:36,460 - Oh. - Um... 55 00:02:36,504 --> 00:02:38,245 And there's a bar. There's a bar. 56 00:02:38,288 --> 00:02:40,986 - There's a bar. - Okay. 57 00:02:41,030 --> 00:02:43,902 Look at that lovely bit of jewelry. 58 00:02:43,946 --> 00:02:45,513 - Free things! - Oh, my God. 59 00:02:45,556 --> 00:02:48,385 - Wow. - This is fucking mad. 60 00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:50,213 Oh, there's a... there... there are stairs. 61 00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,128 - I'm gonna check out the stairs. - Please don't. 62 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,912 Not in your... current... state. 63 00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:55,914 Let me go and do that. 64 00:02:55,958 --> 00:02:57,438 I'll report back. 65 00:03:00,267 --> 00:03:02,704 Wow! 66 00:03:02,747 --> 00:03:05,707 Hello, my people. 67 00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:09,101 There's stone pineapples out here, Paul! 68 00:03:09,145 --> 00:03:11,016 - Hon. Hon. - Yeah? 69 00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:12,757 There's a Jacuzzi in our bathroom. 70 00:03:12,801 --> 00:03:14,672 - No. - Yeah, it... it's really big. 71 00:03:14,716 --> 00:03:15,934 I think it's probably tidal. 72 00:03:15,978 --> 00:03:18,372 Oh, my God. I feel like a rock star. 73 00:03:18,415 --> 00:03:19,721 That's 'cause you're off your face. 74 00:03:19,764 --> 00:03:21,418 - All right, I'm coming up. - Honestly, hon, 75 00:03:21,462 --> 00:03:23,159 - please be careful. - I don't need to be careful. 76 00:03:24,291 --> 00:03:28,164 Ohh. 77 00:03:31,298 --> 00:03:33,604 - Well... - Well... 78 00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:35,432 You know, there's nothing like a... a hotel room 79 00:03:35,476 --> 00:03:36,955 just pressuring you to have sex. 80 00:03:36,999 --> 00:03:39,784 Yeah, it is. It's... It is begging for sex, isn't it? 81 00:03:39,828 --> 00:03:41,221 Yeah. Coming on a bit strong, isn't it? 82 00:03:41,264 --> 00:03:44,746 Yeah, definitely. Back off, room. Shh. 83 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,800 - How long has it been? - I don't know. 84 00:03:55,844 --> 00:03:57,628 Five months. 85 00:03:57,672 --> 00:03:59,891 Listen, we shouldn't be too hard on ourselves. 86 00:03:59,935 --> 00:04:02,416 - About what? - About the, mm, dry spell. 87 00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:04,113 It's been a really difficult few months. 88 00:04:04,156 --> 00:04:07,247 Yeah. Who knew that becoming grandparents wasn't a turn-on? 89 00:04:09,205 --> 00:04:12,121 'Cause it's really weird without them here, isn't it? 90 00:04:12,164 --> 00:04:14,863 It is, yeah. On the other hand, we have bagged 91 00:04:14,906 --> 00:04:16,691 the David Bowie suite at no extra cost. 92 00:04:16,734 --> 00:04:18,780 Do you think that David Bowie actually stayed here? 93 00:04:18,823 --> 00:04:20,999 I definitely do. Yes, I do. 94 00:04:21,043 --> 00:04:23,524 He was a very big fan on all-inclusive package holidays. 95 00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:25,526 - He loved them. - Same with Bolan. 96 00:04:25,569 --> 00:04:28,442 Lou Reed--more of a-- I don't know, campsite guy. 97 00:04:30,095 --> 00:04:31,662 - Oh, man. - Mm. 98 00:04:31,706 --> 00:04:33,273 We should get going, you know? 'Cause, uh, we booked 99 00:04:33,316 --> 00:04:35,231 - that tour for 2:00. - Mm. 100 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,928 Hmm. 101 00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:46,808 Good. That's... That's helpful. 102 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,205 Did it definitely say 2:00? 103 00:04:53,249 --> 00:04:54,685 Yeah, I checked the confirmation. 104 00:04:54,729 --> 00:04:56,208 It's 2:00, hon. 105 00:05:01,692 --> 00:05:04,086 Oh, uh, it's Luke. 106 00:05:04,129 --> 00:05:06,436 He said that Ava's having a great day at the lab. 107 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:07,829 - Mm-hmm. - But she's very busy 108 00:05:07,872 --> 00:05:09,439 and that they're gonna get takeaway later. 109 00:05:09,483 --> 00:05:12,050 - Maya is craving Italian. - Ah, great. 110 00:05:12,094 --> 00:05:13,138 - Aw. - See? 111 00:05:13,182 --> 00:05:14,792 - See what? - They're fine. 112 00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:16,881 I... I didn't think they were gonna get murdered, Paul. 113 00:05:16,925 --> 00:05:18,579 I just wanted to touch base. 114 00:05:18,622 --> 00:05:21,756 Look, no one wishes they were here more than I do, hon. 115 00:05:21,799 --> 00:05:24,062 This was gonna be our last... 116 00:05:24,106 --> 00:05:25,673 big... I don't know. 117 00:05:25,716 --> 00:05:27,370 Big family holiday together. 118 00:05:27,414 --> 00:05:28,676 Well, yeah. You... You don't think, do you, 119 00:05:28,719 --> 00:05:30,068 when the kids are little, that you've got 120 00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:32,244 a finite amount of family holidays together, 121 00:05:32,288 --> 00:05:33,811 but it turns out you have, and it seems like 122 00:05:33,855 --> 00:05:36,292 we might have had our last one without even realizing it. 123 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:38,338 Yeah. 124 00:05:38,381 --> 00:05:40,688 Oh. There he is. Hi. 125 00:05:40,731 --> 00:05:42,124 You for the tour? 126 00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:43,734 Uh, yes. For Worsley. 127 00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:47,434 - Oh. - Four of you? 128 00:05:48,217 --> 00:05:50,828 Uh, no, it's just... just two of us 'cause our daughter Ava... 129 00:05:50,872 --> 00:05:52,917 Oh, yeah. It doesn't matter. Yeah. 130 00:05:52,961 --> 00:05:55,355 I won't go into... into that. Yeah. 131 00:05:56,225 --> 00:05:58,140 - So, two of you, then? - Yeah. 132 00:05:58,183 --> 00:05:59,968 No one else has booked? 133 00:06:00,011 --> 00:06:01,448 - No. - Ah. 134 00:06:02,318 --> 00:06:04,538 - We'll start with the exterior. - Oh. It's happening. 135 00:06:04,581 --> 00:06:07,628 The tower was completed in 1637. 136 00:06:07,671 --> 00:06:12,023 It's 11 meters high with, as you can see, a square base... 137 00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:13,764 - Mm-hmm. - ...and two levels. 138 00:06:13,808 --> 00:06:16,637 Access to the upper floors was originally by means 139 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:19,117 - of a wooden ladder. - Uh-huh. 140 00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:20,858 Just be aware there's no photography 141 00:06:20,902 --> 00:06:22,294 allowed inside the tower. 142 00:06:22,338 --> 00:06:25,254 Oh, sorry. Yeah, of course. 143 00:06:25,297 --> 00:06:27,256 This is one of the surviving eight towers 144 00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:29,693 of an original 13 that were built to enhance 145 00:06:29,737 --> 00:06:33,393 and expand the town's existing system of coastal defense. 146 00:06:33,436 --> 00:06:36,396 - We will see all eight today. - Very good. 147 00:06:38,180 --> 00:06:40,443 - Will we? Eight? - Eight. 148 00:06:40,487 --> 00:06:41,444 - Okay. - Where you are? 149 00:06:43,185 --> 00:06:44,926 Uh... 150 00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:47,581 - You all right? - Uh, can't find the keys. 151 00:06:49,583 --> 00:06:52,237 The next tower we will explore had repair work 152 00:06:52,281 --> 00:06:55,850 in the mid-19th century that revealed the foundations 153 00:06:55,893 --> 00:07:00,942 of the Church of St. Agatha, destroyed in 1075. 154 00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:02,465 Care to guess what might have been 155 00:07:02,509 --> 00:07:03,945 the cause of that destruction? 156 00:07:03,988 --> 00:07:05,512 Damp. 157 00:07:07,731 --> 00:07:09,994 Uh, asteroids? Oh, no, that was the dinosaurs, wasn't it? 158 00:07:10,038 --> 00:07:11,387 Um, fire? 159 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:14,346 Yes. It was a big fire. 160 00:07:14,390 --> 00:07:15,435 Oh. 161 00:07:16,523 --> 00:07:18,046 Follow me. 162 00:07:18,873 --> 00:07:20,657 He's a fucking laugh, isn't he? 163 00:07:20,701 --> 00:07:22,616 It's like being shown around by that bloke from Up. 164 00:07:24,182 --> 00:07:25,314 Oh, hello, hello. 165 00:07:25,357 --> 00:07:27,708 - Taxi. - Oh. Are you serious? 166 00:07:27,751 --> 00:07:30,188 No, he's serious. I'm sensible. 167 00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:32,713 - Should we... s... - In addition to this, 168 00:07:32,756 --> 00:07:36,760 she is the patron saint of... 169 00:07:36,804 --> 00:07:37,761 - Get on the driver. - I'm gonna... okay. 170 00:07:37,805 --> 00:07:39,981 I'm gonna go the other side. 171 00:07:40,024 --> 00:07:41,635 Hi. 172 00:07:41,678 --> 00:07:43,114 Hi. Xara Palace Hotel, please. 173 00:07:43,158 --> 00:07:45,856 You booked? Jameson? 174 00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:48,163 Um, yes. Yeah, yeah, that, um... 175 00:07:48,206 --> 00:07:49,860 - Yep. - We are Mr. And Mrs. Jameson. 176 00:07:49,904 --> 00:07:50,992 - Mrs. Jame-- Jameson. - Thank you for waiting for us. 177 00:07:51,035 --> 00:07:54,517 - Thanks for waiting. - Ahh. 178 00:07:54,561 --> 00:07:56,040 - Excuse me. - Oh, that's the way to do that. 179 00:07:56,084 --> 00:07:57,477 - Oh, fuck, it's their taxi. - Excuse me. 180 00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:58,565 Um, let's go. I think we can go now. 181 00:07:58,608 --> 00:08:00,131 - Yeah, yeah. - That's... 182 00:08:00,175 --> 00:08:01,916 - That's definitely ours? - Yeah, that's our taxi. 183 00:08:01,959 --> 00:08:02,960 Hey! What... 184 00:08:04,788 --> 00:08:06,703 Bastards! 185 00:08:06,747 --> 00:08:09,184 - Massive bastards. - Why? 186 00:08:16,452 --> 00:08:18,541 We'd have made a great Bonnie and Clyde. 187 00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:20,761 Yeah, as long as someone pre-booked the getaway car. 188 00:08:20,804 --> 00:08:23,198 Right, so, what next? Should we, uh, take a tour 189 00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:25,156 of the old town square and then shoot up a bank? 190 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:27,289 No, let's... let's save something for tomorrow, baby. 191 00:08:27,332 --> 00:08:28,769 - Aw. - Um... 192 00:08:28,812 --> 00:08:30,248 Why don't we hit the pool 193 00:08:30,292 --> 00:08:31,815 and drink cocktails all afternoon? 194 00:08:31,859 --> 00:08:35,384 Now, you, Mr. Worsley, you know how to holiday. 195 00:08:44,045 --> 00:08:45,307 Oh, no. 196 00:08:46,134 --> 00:08:49,050 I think this has blue cheese in it. 197 00:08:49,093 --> 00:08:50,312 Oh. I didn't even think about that. 198 00:08:50,355 --> 00:08:52,532 Oh, shit. 199 00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,490 Do you think you can take it out? 200 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:57,145 How? By washing the pasta? 201 00:08:57,188 --> 00:08:59,321 Um, well, you can... you can share mine. 202 00:08:59,364 --> 00:09:00,496 There's at least enough for three in there. 203 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:01,453 - Mm-hmm. - Okay. 204 00:09:07,503 --> 00:09:08,635 Thanks. 205 00:09:08,678 --> 00:09:10,288 It's okay. 206 00:09:22,997 --> 00:09:24,433 Mm. 207 00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:42,582 Shut the fuck up, mate. 208 00:09:44,061 --> 00:09:46,281 What's wrong? 209 00:09:46,324 --> 00:09:48,239 It's not their section, is it, hon? 210 00:09:48,283 --> 00:09:50,807 - Paul, it's not the Titanic. - Mm. 211 00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:52,504 It's the adults-only pool, though, innit? 212 00:09:52,548 --> 00:09:56,639 It's not the "adults, only, it's the kids, actually" pool. 213 00:09:56,683 --> 00:09:57,814 How long have you been working on that? 214 00:09:57,858 --> 00:10:00,600 About a minute. 215 00:10:00,643 --> 00:10:02,776 Look, let's just try and relax. 216 00:10:02,819 --> 00:10:04,299 - Okay? - Yeah, very relaxing, innit? 217 00:10:04,342 --> 00:10:05,779 Fucking American Sniper over there. 218 00:10:05,822 --> 00:10:08,390 Fucking menace. 219 00:10:24,711 --> 00:10:26,451 You enjoying this? 220 00:10:26,495 --> 00:10:28,366 This relaxing you? 221 00:10:28,410 --> 00:10:30,673 Should we go for a swim? 222 00:10:30,717 --> 00:10:33,589 I considered it, but... 223 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,243 I don't know. 224 00:10:35,286 --> 00:10:37,419 Don't want to upstage Premier League Ken over there 225 00:10:37,462 --> 00:10:39,116 with my front crawl. 226 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:41,031 You're not actually self-conscious, are you? 227 00:10:41,075 --> 00:10:42,772 You look great. 228 00:10:42,816 --> 00:10:45,470 Anyway, look, that guy's got his top off, doesn't he? 229 00:10:46,036 --> 00:10:48,082 Aside from the fact that we've both got nipples, 230 00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:49,518 I hope you don't think we're that similar. 231 00:10:49,561 --> 00:10:50,954 - No, I'm not say... - Fuck me. 232 00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:52,739 I'm not saying that. I'm just saying that you're 233 00:10:52,782 --> 00:10:55,132 allowed to have your top off. 234 00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:57,178 No one would be judging you. 235 00:10:57,221 --> 00:10:59,528 Sorry, let... let me... let me just be clear. 236 00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:01,530 - Everyone would be judging me. - Oh. 237 00:11:01,573 --> 00:11:04,838 Right? Judging people is what human beings do best. 238 00:11:04,881 --> 00:11:06,883 There's a little thing called the internet they like to use. 239 00:11:12,759 --> 00:11:14,499 - That's it, innit? - Whoo! 240 00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:17,154 We're the old people round the pool now, fucking... 241 00:11:17,198 --> 00:11:19,417 That is a bit bleak, isn't it? Come on. 242 00:11:19,461 --> 00:11:21,724 I guarantee you, babe, you ask any of these fuckers. 243 00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:23,639 That is what we are. 244 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:27,338 We're the aging parents at best, 245 00:11:27,382 --> 00:11:30,254 the people who you bring round to bleed your radiators 246 00:11:30,298 --> 00:11:31,603 and lend you money. 247 00:11:31,647 --> 00:11:33,954 Christ, I am really, very, very sorry 248 00:11:33,997 --> 00:11:37,131 that I pointed at an elderly topless man. 249 00:11:37,174 --> 00:11:38,567 It won't happen again. 250 00:11:41,135 --> 00:11:42,658 We really should bleed the radiator. 251 00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:45,226 It's such a drag. 252 00:11:48,359 --> 00:11:50,884 Oh, shitting hell, it's the taxi couple. 253 00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:52,842 - Fuck. - Fuck. 254 00:11:52,886 --> 00:11:54,278 - Just look away. Look away. - No, I... 255 00:11:54,322 --> 00:11:56,454 - They won't... - Can we get... 256 00:11:56,498 --> 00:11:57,673 - Just play deaf. Play deaf. - It's too late, too late. 257 00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:58,892 It's not going to be... 258 00:11:58,935 --> 00:12:01,285 Oh, thanks. Leave me to deal with it. 259 00:12:02,809 --> 00:12:05,420 - Sorry, mate. - Huh? 260 00:12:05,463 --> 00:12:06,987 Do you mind if we take these chairs? 261 00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:10,294 Yeah, uh, yeah, of course. 262 00:12:10,338 --> 00:12:11,687 Just, uh, yeah. Yours for the taking. 263 00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:12,862 - Go for it. - Cheers. 264 00:12:12,906 --> 00:12:15,038 - No worries. - I'm Jameson. 265 00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:17,475 Oh, uh, Paul. My wife, Ally. 266 00:12:17,519 --> 00:12:19,477 Hey, I thought that was your surname-- 267 00:12:19,521 --> 00:12:21,523 I thought that's, um, just a very unusual first name. 268 00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:24,265 Yeah, yeah, me dad really loves whisky. 269 00:12:24,308 --> 00:12:25,919 - Oh. - Oh. 270 00:12:25,962 --> 00:12:27,964 - Uh, this is me wife, Kirsty. - Hi, Kirsty. 271 00:12:28,008 --> 00:12:29,357 - Hi, Kirsty. - Hi. Nice to meet you. 272 00:12:34,492 --> 00:12:35,798 They're in the wrong section. 273 00:12:35,842 --> 00:12:37,931 Yes, they are. Thank you. 274 00:12:37,974 --> 00:12:40,020 Voice of sanity. 275 00:12:40,063 --> 00:12:42,065 - It's not right, though. - Yeah, I know. 276 00:12:42,109 --> 00:12:44,154 - Someone should have a word. - Mm. 277 00:12:54,338 --> 00:12:56,340 - Oh? - Excuse me, Jameson. 278 00:13:06,568 --> 00:13:08,135 Oh, gosh. 279 00:13:08,178 --> 00:13:10,354 Don't fight the man. 280 00:13:11,921 --> 00:13:13,967 Oh, you're not fighting the man. 281 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:17,231 Excuse me. Could you just ask these people 282 00:13:17,274 --> 00:13:19,668 to take their kids away? It is the adults-only pool, so... 283 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,149 Thank you. 284 00:13:31,245 --> 00:13:34,117 - Oh, really? - What does it matter? 285 00:13:36,903 --> 00:13:38,034 Why do we have to... 286 00:13:42,169 --> 00:13:43,997 - Nice one. - Thank you. 287 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,825 Very good. 288 00:13:45,868 --> 00:13:46,956 Ah. 289 00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:51,918 Anyone for a drink? 290 00:13:54,094 --> 00:13:56,923 Oh, God, I'm so jealous. So cool you guys live in London. 291 00:13:56,966 --> 00:13:58,794 - Yes, it is, innit? - Yeah, we're very grateful. 292 00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,535 Yeah. 293 00:14:00,578 --> 00:14:02,102 Another round? 294 00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:03,451 Uh, looks like they're closing up, isn't it? 295 00:14:03,494 --> 00:14:04,887 Oh, shit, yeah. We are... 296 00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:06,715 - We are the last people here. - Oh. 297 00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:09,326 Well, I guess we should probably call it a night. 298 00:14:09,370 --> 00:14:11,938 - Yeah. - So glad we met you guys. 299 00:14:11,981 --> 00:14:13,548 We were worried it was gonna be all families, you know? 300 00:14:13,591 --> 00:14:15,376 - Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah, right. 301 00:14:15,419 --> 00:14:17,900 Stupid families. Who needs 'em? 302 00:14:17,944 --> 00:14:19,119 - Had a really nice evening. - Yeah, that was great. 303 00:14:19,162 --> 00:14:20,337 - Thanks. - Yeah. 304 00:14:20,381 --> 00:14:22,252 - Lovely. - See you guys soon. 305 00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:23,950 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. 306 00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:25,908 Ah. 307 00:14:25,952 --> 00:14:26,691 Are you good to make a move, babe? 308 00:14:26,735 --> 00:14:28,171 - Oh, yeah. - Okay. 309 00:14:28,215 --> 00:14:29,999 - That was really nice. - Yeah, it was, wasn't it? 310 00:14:30,043 --> 00:14:32,654 Yeah, I like them. 311 00:14:32,697 --> 00:14:35,004 He's got, uh, big arms. 312 00:14:35,048 --> 00:14:36,614 - Ooh. - What? 313 00:14:36,658 --> 00:14:38,312 That's not our key, 'cause I've got our key. 314 00:14:38,355 --> 00:14:41,924 Okay. Oh, shit. Is it theirs? Must be theirs. 315 00:14:41,968 --> 00:14:43,752 - Uh, okay. - What? 316 00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:47,060 You don't think... that when they said, "See you guys soon," 317 00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:49,279 - that that was... No. - No. 318 00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:50,715 - No, no, no, no. - No. 319 00:14:52,935 --> 00:14:54,806 - Or... no! - Okay. 320 00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:56,156 - No. - No. 321 00:14:56,199 --> 00:14:57,940 - Hi. - Yes? 322 00:14:57,984 --> 00:14:59,637 Uh, just wanted to return this key. 323 00:14:59,681 --> 00:15:01,596 Oh! Thank God. We're looking for that everywhere. 324 00:15:01,639 --> 00:15:03,337 - Oh. Okay. Sorry about that. - Cheers. 325 00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:04,599 - Yeah. - See you around. 326 00:15:04,642 --> 00:15:05,513 Yeah, yeah. Good night. Take care. 327 00:15:08,516 --> 00:15:09,865 Nah. 328 00:15:16,306 --> 00:15:20,963 Okay, so if that had been a... a real invitation, 329 00:15:21,007 --> 00:15:25,446 a sexy invitation, a sex-tation... 330 00:15:25,489 --> 00:15:28,623 I don't like where this is heading. 331 00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:30,407 No, I'm serious. Would you ever... 332 00:15:32,061 --> 00:15:34,150 So, is this a test? 'Cause I'm... I'm... 333 00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:37,849 I'm pretty sure I'm gonna fail it. 334 00:15:37,893 --> 00:15:39,590 Why, would you? 335 00:15:39,634 --> 00:15:40,722 Mm... 336 00:15:46,423 --> 00:15:47,859 I suppose I always just thought that it was something 337 00:15:47,903 --> 00:15:51,080 - that older couples did... - Mm. 338 00:15:51,124 --> 00:15:52,952 ...once they got bored of each other. 339 00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:54,954 Right, right, so not for us, then. 340 00:15:56,259 --> 00:15:58,305 Hey. 341 00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:21,937 You okay? 342 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,678 I'll be okay. I just need to... 343 00:16:23,721 --> 00:16:25,506 sit up for a bit. 344 00:16:30,685 --> 00:16:32,078 It's so quiet here. 345 00:16:32,121 --> 00:16:33,993 - Yeah. No, it's great, isn't it? - Yeah. 346 00:16:37,039 --> 00:16:38,562 Shit. 347 00:16:38,606 --> 00:16:40,347 Smooth. 348 00:16:40,390 --> 00:16:42,653 Always graceful. I did ballet for four years. 349 00:16:42,697 --> 00:16:44,481 - No, you didn't. - Yes, I did. 350 00:16:44,525 --> 00:16:46,048 - No, you... Seriously? - Yeah. 351 00:16:46,092 --> 00:16:48,790 Okay, that's ridiculous. How did I not know that? 352 00:16:48,833 --> 00:16:50,531 Oh, 'cause I'm a woman of hidden depths 353 00:16:50,574 --> 00:16:51,836 - and endless mystery. - Oh. 354 00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:53,186 So, what else don't I know about you? 355 00:16:53,229 --> 00:16:54,709 Oh, no, actually, I think ballet's... 356 00:16:54,752 --> 00:16:55,927 Just joking again. 357 00:16:55,971 --> 00:16:57,668 Oh, my God. 358 00:16:57,712 --> 00:16:59,409 We forgot to check back in with the kids again last night. 359 00:16:59,453 --> 00:17:02,021 Yeah, well, you know, we were sort of busy. 360 00:17:02,064 --> 00:17:06,503 Mm. Yeah, maybe it's... maybe it's a good thing. 361 00:17:06,547 --> 00:17:09,158 Before we know it, we'll be back to being a two-man band again. 362 00:17:09,202 --> 00:17:11,595 Yeah, still feels weird, eh? 363 00:17:11,639 --> 00:17:12,944 Mm. 364 00:17:12,988 --> 00:17:14,076 - I'm gonna come back for coffee. - Okay. 365 00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:15,686 - Oh. - Hey! 366 00:17:15,730 --> 00:17:17,297 - Oh! - Oh! Hi. 367 00:17:17,340 --> 00:17:18,602 Look at us with our holiday friends. 368 00:17:22,824 --> 00:17:27,002 Ha! 369 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:29,135 Hon... 370 00:17:29,178 --> 00:17:31,398 - there is genuinely no point. - There is! 371 00:17:31,441 --> 00:17:32,964 There's genuinely no point in playing. 372 00:17:33,008 --> 00:17:34,270 - It's more fun. - Thank you very much. 373 00:17:34,314 --> 00:17:36,272 I can't help my amazing strength. 374 00:17:36,316 --> 00:17:38,753 - Can you not? - You got to really whack it, 375 00:17:38,796 --> 00:17:40,494 or the ball won't respect you. 376 00:17:40,537 --> 00:17:42,278 - Is that right? - Yes! 377 00:17:43,453 --> 00:17:44,846 - Oh, it's Luke. - Oh! 378 00:17:44,889 --> 00:17:46,413 Hey, mate. Everything all right? 379 00:17:47,283 --> 00:17:49,111 Yeah, of course. Yeah, it's fine. 380 00:17:49,677 --> 00:17:52,506 Yeah, just... just be careful. I mean, not too careful. 381 00:17:52,549 --> 00:17:55,248 - Try and hit the speed limit. - Tell him I love him. 382 00:17:55,291 --> 00:17:58,903 Yes, I will. And she sends hers, yeah. 383 00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:02,820 All righty, I love you, mate. Speak soon. Bye-bye. 384 00:18:03,343 --> 00:18:04,779 He just wants to take Maya somewhere in the car. 385 00:18:04,822 --> 00:18:06,128 Oh, that's sweet. 386 00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:08,261 Okay, so, nice volley, okay? 387 00:18:08,304 --> 00:18:11,002 Just a nice, simple... 388 00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:13,440 Fuck me, right? I mean, like, who's over there? 389 00:18:13,483 --> 00:18:14,963 Go and get it. 390 00:18:15,006 --> 00:18:16,269 Don't drown. 391 00:18:26,279 --> 00:18:27,758 Um... 392 00:18:27,802 --> 00:18:30,283 - Can we... - Yeah. 393 00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:42,512 So, you know the, um, the course that I applied to 394 00:18:42,556 --> 00:18:44,471 the Manchester one, the long shot? 395 00:18:44,514 --> 00:18:46,168 - Of course. Your dream course. - Yeah. 396 00:18:46,212 --> 00:18:49,128 - Uh-huh. - I, uh, I got a place, and... 397 00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:52,435 Lukey. Oh, my God. That's... That's amazing! 398 00:18:52,479 --> 00:18:54,611 You star! Wait, why... 399 00:18:54,655 --> 00:18:56,047 Why didn't you tell me this earlier? 400 00:18:56,091 --> 00:18:58,267 Well, I've been thinking about it a lot, 401 00:18:58,311 --> 00:19:01,227 and, you know, I really wanna be there for you and the baby. 402 00:19:01,270 --> 00:19:02,880 Nothing's more important. 403 00:19:02,924 --> 00:19:04,882 This course could change everything for you. 404 00:19:06,101 --> 00:19:08,756 I don't wanna change things. I wanna be with you. 405 00:19:08,799 --> 00:19:11,193 Yeah, and you will be, just not in the same city. 406 00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:13,674 Oh, you... you really can't turn this down. 407 00:19:15,284 --> 00:19:18,113 - I already have. - What? 408 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:21,072 I emailed them saying that I'm declining my place. 409 00:19:21,116 --> 00:19:22,770 - Have you gone mad? - Well, I... I... 410 00:19:22,813 --> 00:19:24,467 I did it for us. I did it for all three of us. 411 00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:26,600 I can't believe you've done this. 412 00:19:26,643 --> 00:19:28,950 And I can't believe you're reacting like this. 413 00:19:28,993 --> 00:19:31,344 I don't want you to miss out on an amazing opportunity. 414 00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:33,955 Yeah, and I'm willing to give it up for you and the baby. 415 00:19:33,998 --> 00:19:36,871 Mm, no, don't make it my responsibility, my fault, 416 00:19:36,914 --> 00:19:38,394 if you end up regretting it! 417 00:19:38,438 --> 00:19:40,266 Do you see how bad that would be for me? 418 00:19:40,309 --> 00:19:41,789 - No! I don't! - You don't? 419 00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:43,225 No, I genuinely don't! 420 00:19:43,269 --> 00:19:45,401 Look, I don't wanna keep 421 00:19:45,445 --> 00:19:47,229 banging on about the pan-fried rabbit. 422 00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:49,013 - But... - You bloody loved that rabbit. 423 00:19:49,057 --> 00:19:52,539 I just wanna know how do they make food taste like that? 424 00:19:52,582 --> 00:19:53,714 Magic and loads of salt and butter. 425 00:19:53,757 --> 00:19:55,281 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. 426 00:19:55,324 --> 00:19:56,586 It's been a really good day, hasn't it? 427 00:19:56,630 --> 00:19:58,458 - Yeah. - No screaming children 428 00:19:58,501 --> 00:20:00,242 in the adults' pool earlier. That was all down to you, Paul. 429 00:20:00,286 --> 00:20:01,983 - Well... - You badass. 430 00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:03,593 Well, I'm just a concerned citizen doing my little bit. 431 00:20:03,637 --> 00:20:04,725 - Yeah. - You know, I don't... 432 00:20:04,768 --> 00:20:07,118 I don't seek recognition for that. 433 00:20:07,162 --> 00:20:10,426 Maybe a small, simple gold statue of myself 434 00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:12,167 over by the towels, but nothing more, honestly. 435 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,952 - Nothing more. - It was a lot more peaceful. 436 00:20:14,996 --> 00:20:16,693 [Kirsty[ Oh, parents can't expect their kids 437 00:20:16,737 --> 00:20:18,129 to have the run of the whole hotel. 438 00:20:18,173 --> 00:20:20,828 - Exactly. - People can be so entitled. 439 00:20:20,871 --> 00:20:23,134 - Yeah. - You know, two arseholes 440 00:20:23,178 --> 00:20:24,266 stole our taxi yesterday when we were coming from the beach. 441 00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:25,702 - Oh, yeah. - Just took it. 442 00:20:25,746 --> 00:20:27,269 We were waiting around for hours. 443 00:20:27,313 --> 00:20:29,924 - Oh, no. - That's just awful. 444 00:20:29,967 --> 00:20:31,273 Yeah. 445 00:20:31,317 --> 00:20:33,710 Does, uh, anyone fancy a nightcap? 446 00:20:33,754 --> 00:20:35,886 Hey, there's karaoke at the bar tonight. 447 00:20:35,930 --> 00:20:38,062 - There was a notice up. - I don't know if I fancy that. 448 00:20:38,106 --> 00:20:39,455 - Uh... - I was thinking a quiet drink. 449 00:20:39,499 --> 00:20:42,066 Yeah, w-well, we could... we could go up to ours. 450 00:20:42,110 --> 00:20:45,113 Oh, yeah, we're... we're... we're in the presidential suite. 451 00:20:45,156 --> 00:20:46,636 Oh, my God. You're in a suite. 452 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:49,030 - That is epic. What's it like? - It's lovely. 453 00:20:49,073 --> 00:20:50,423 Do you know what? No, it's not lovely. 454 00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:52,381 - It is amazing. - No, it's absolutely ridiculous. 455 00:20:52,425 --> 00:20:54,296 It's way too good for us, but, um, yeah. 456 00:20:54,340 --> 00:20:56,124 You'd be welcome to come up for a drink. 457 00:20:56,167 --> 00:20:57,604 - Sure. - Yeah. 458 00:20:57,647 --> 00:20:59,127 - Yeah. - Yeah? 459 00:20:59,170 --> 00:20:59,954 - Yeah, we'd love to. - Great, well, let's do it. 460 00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:01,825 Yeah. 461 00:21:03,131 --> 00:21:04,306 - Ooh. - Ta-da! 462 00:21:05,568 --> 00:21:07,483 Oh! 463 00:21:07,527 --> 00:21:10,051 - Oh, my fucking God. - Yeah. 464 00:21:10,094 --> 00:21:12,140 Nice. Very presidential. 465 00:21:12,183 --> 00:21:13,533 Yeah, it's quite something, isn't it? 466 00:21:13,576 --> 00:21:15,578 Would anyone like presidential champagne? 467 00:21:15,622 --> 00:21:16,797 - Yes, please. - Oh! 468 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:17,711 - Yes, please. - Thank you. 469 00:21:17,754 --> 00:21:20,757 - Coming right up. - Wow. 470 00:21:20,801 --> 00:21:24,283 Um... do you mind if I use your bathroom? 471 00:21:24,326 --> 00:21:25,719 Oh, yeah, it's just on the next level. 472 00:21:25,762 --> 00:21:27,373 Okay. 473 00:21:36,469 --> 00:21:38,122 Oh, hon, they both go upstairs? 474 00:21:38,166 --> 00:21:40,168 - Yes, weirdly. - Hmm. 475 00:21:40,211 --> 00:21:41,996 Oh, would you get some glasses on, please? 476 00:21:42,039 --> 00:21:44,128 - Uh-huh. - Thank you. 477 00:21:46,566 --> 00:21:48,481 - Cheers. - Cheers. 478 00:21:55,270 --> 00:21:57,228 Are they having a bath? 479 00:21:58,926 --> 00:22:00,928 I think we're all gonna have a bath. 480 00:22:20,251 --> 00:22:21,992 Look at it. 481 00:22:26,432 --> 00:22:28,869 How long do we have to wait? 482 00:22:28,912 --> 00:22:30,218 God knows. 483 00:22:31,785 --> 00:22:34,918 Is it faster or slower when it's two people instead of four? 484 00:22:34,962 --> 00:22:37,225 I've never had a foursome. 485 00:22:37,268 --> 00:22:39,227 - Have you not? - No. 486 00:22:39,270 --> 00:22:41,403 Well, that's that and the ballet that I know about now. 487 00:22:43,274 --> 00:22:45,407 Oh, I hope they don't steal all our stuff. 488 00:22:45,451 --> 00:22:47,670 I'd rather they stole our stuff 489 00:22:47,714 --> 00:22:52,632 than our... foursome virginity. 490 00:22:52,675 --> 00:22:54,590 I can't believe they wanted to fuck us. 491 00:22:54,634 --> 00:22:56,418 No? 492 00:22:56,462 --> 00:22:58,377 I can. I'd fuck us. 493 00:22:58,420 --> 00:23:00,248 We're totally fuckable people, babe. 494 00:23:01,771 --> 00:23:04,121 Oh, I'm having the best time with you. 495 00:23:04,165 --> 00:23:06,385 Yeah, me, too. 496 00:23:07,298 --> 00:23:09,300 I was sad that the family holidays are over, 497 00:23:09,344 --> 00:23:12,391 - but this is just lovely. - Yeah, it's lovely. 498 00:23:13,174 --> 00:23:15,394 - To us. - To us. 499 00:23:15,437 --> 00:23:17,308 Twang. 500 00:23:20,486 --> 00:23:21,704 Mm. 501 00:23:22,052 --> 00:23:24,620 Ah. 502 00:23:24,664 --> 00:23:26,970 Oh, what's the time? I left my phone in the room 503 00:23:27,014 --> 00:23:28,972 with the sexers. 504 00:23:29,016 --> 00:23:31,279 Oh, shit. 505 00:23:31,322 --> 00:23:33,673 - What is it? - What the fuck? 506 00:23:36,502 --> 00:23:38,112 Do you see how bad that would be for me? 507 00:23:38,155 --> 00:23:39,940 - No, I don't! - You don't? 508 00:23:39,983 --> 00:23:42,551 No, I genuinely don't. 509 00:23:52,909 --> 00:23:53,693 Luke? 510 00:23:54,911 --> 00:23:56,043 Are you okay? 511 00:23:58,741 --> 00:24:01,570 I think my waters have broken. 512 00:24:06,401 --> 00:24:08,359 - Do something, Luke. - Is it, um... 513 00:24:08,403 --> 00:24:10,623 Call Mum. 514 00:24:10,666 --> 00:24:12,059 You sure it isn't a really big wee? 515 00:24:12,102 --> 00:24:13,190 - It's not a wee. - Because sometimes the baby 516 00:24:13,234 --> 00:24:14,888 can push on the bladder, 517 00:24:14,931 --> 00:24:16,977 - and it looks like-- - It isn't a wee, Luke! 518 00:24:17,020 --> 00:24:19,109 Oh, my God! Um... 519 00:24:19,153 --> 00:24:21,242 - I think the baby's coming. - We've still got five weeks! 520 00:24:21,285 --> 00:24:22,983 - Call Mum. - Mum's in Malta. 521 00:24:23,026 --> 00:24:25,159 - Mymum! - Oh, um... 522 00:24:25,202 --> 00:24:27,030 I'll run and get the car. I'll be 10 minutes, tops, okay? 523 00:24:27,074 --> 00:24:29,119 - You come and sit back down. - No, no, Luke, I-I need my mum. 524 00:24:29,163 --> 00:24:30,947 Can you just call her? Please, now. 38180

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