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1
00:00:14,520 --> 00:00:16,640
Hey, you got a permit
for those guns?
2
00:00:17,840 --> 00:00:19,610
I got your permit right here.
3
00:00:30,980 --> 00:00:32,160
Catchy tune.
4
00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:41,160
Fuck this game.
5
00:00:42,100 --> 00:00:44,040
FUCK YOU!
6
00:01:20,060 --> 00:01:22,380
We need backup,
we need Kung Fury!
7
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:40,260
Yeah, that's my bicep.
8
00:01:41,860 --> 00:01:42,900
One second babe.
9
00:01:44,100 --> 00:01:44,860
Hello?
10
00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:46,940
We got an arcade machine
down here going crazy,
11
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,140
it is killing everybody,
it's destruction, chaos, terror-
12
00:01:51,120 --> 00:01:52,080
What are you gonna do?
13
00:01:52,380 --> 00:01:53,240
My job.
14
00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:01,580
Game over.
15
00:03:08,420 --> 00:03:11,280
I'm a cop and
damn good at my job.
16
00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:14,000
It all began years ago.
17
00:03:14,280 --> 00:03:15,590
In the line of duty,
18
00:03:15,690 --> 00:03:17,160
me and my partner were
chasing down
19
00:03:17,170 --> 00:03:19,160
a mysterious Kung Fu-master.
20
00:03:20,540 --> 00:03:22,000
You're under arrest, punk.
21
00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:23,160
Show us your hands.
22
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:26,580
Good work, Dragon.
23
00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:28,680
You could've killed both of us
with that crazy stunt
24
00:03:28,820 --> 00:03:31,680
but goddammit, you're the
best partner I've ever had.
25
00:03:31,740 --> 00:03:33,960
Thanks,
I learned from the best.
26
00:03:35,140 --> 00:03:36,660
You're like a father to me.
27
00:03:37,180 --> 00:03:39,910
With one fatal blow,
he hit my partner.
28
00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:44,120
I could tell
he was dead straight off.
29
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,140
Before I could pull the trigger...
30
00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:56,420
I was hit by lightning
and bitten by a cobra.
31
00:03:56,930 --> 00:03:58,080
I blacked out.
32
00:04:01,670 --> 00:04:04,870
And saw images of ancient
Shaolin temples and monks,
33
00:04:04,970 --> 00:04:06,840
mastering the art of Kung Fu.
34
00:04:07,270 --> 00:04:08,710
There was an ancient prophecy,
35
00:04:08,810 --> 00:04:11,210
about a new form
of Kung Fu so powerful,
36
00:04:11,310 --> 00:04:13,120
only one man could master it.
37
00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:14,720
The chosen one.
38
00:04:16,440 --> 00:04:17,500
When I woke up,
39
00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,260
I saw the Kung Fu master
running towards me.
40
00:04:20,840 --> 00:04:22,820
I could feel my body mutate
41
00:04:22,900 --> 00:04:25,760
into some sort of
Kung Fu freak of nature.
42
00:04:37,020 --> 00:04:37,740
You!
43
00:04:39,310 --> 00:04:40,710
You are the chosen one!
44
00:04:42,580 --> 00:04:44,780
- Knock, knock.
- Who's there?
45
00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,420
Knuckles.
46
00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:09,180
As a memento,
47
00:05:09,260 --> 00:05:12,500
I put on a strip of cloth
from the dead Kung Fu master.
48
00:05:12,770 --> 00:05:15,480
I decided I would use
my new super Kung Fu powers
49
00:05:15,490 --> 00:05:16,580
to fight crime.
50
00:05:16,660 --> 00:05:18,740
So, I became
the best cop in the world.
51
00:05:18,750 --> 00:05:21,040
I became, Kung Fury.
52
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,840
I don't wanna hear it Kung Fury.
53
00:06:14,940 --> 00:06:18,540
I just got back from city hall,
$50 million worth of damages,
54
00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:21,940
and I got the mayor up
my ass like a fag on Viagra.
55
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,840
How am I going to explain
this to the press, hmm?
56
00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:29,240
You just destroyed an entire
city block for Christ's sake.
57
00:06:29,460 --> 00:06:31,160
Didn't you tell me
to block it out?
58
00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:33,090
I told you do it by the book.
59
00:06:33,100 --> 00:06:34,260
Cut the bullshit.
60
00:06:34,460 --> 00:06:35,890
Nobody else could have stopped
61
00:06:35,990 --> 00:06:37,960
that arcade machine
and you know it.
62
00:06:39,990 --> 00:06:43,060
Oh man, listen to me Kung Fury.
63
00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:46,670
You need to start following
the rules like the rest of us,
64
00:06:46,770 --> 00:06:48,770
so I'm assigning you
a new partner.
65
00:06:48,870 --> 00:06:50,800
What?
Hell no, I work alone.
66
00:06:50,820 --> 00:06:52,470
Not anymore you don't.
67
00:06:52,570 --> 00:06:56,020
Say hi to your new partner,
Triceracop.
68
00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:58,250
Very nice meeting you Kung Fury,
69
00:06:58,280 --> 00:07:00,480
looking forward to
working with you.
70
00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,820
You're like a father to me.
71
00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:06,800
I work alone.
72
00:07:07,040 --> 00:07:09,420
Either you team up
with Triceracop,
73
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,240
or you're off the case.
74
00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:12,540
I'm not off the case,
75
00:07:13,060 --> 00:07:14,100
I quit.
76
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:28,120
Yeah Yeah, I did the blood test.
77
00:07:28,220 --> 00:07:30,140
It was positive, yeah?
78
00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:31,250
What the hell
are you talking about?
79
00:07:31,280 --> 00:07:32,500
Yeah no problem.
80
00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,280
Give me the phone.
81
00:07:40,720 --> 00:07:42,800
What the hell is this?
82
00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:48,060
- Chief McNickles speaking.
- Is this the police?
83
00:07:48,620 --> 00:07:51,060
- Yeah, this is the police.
- Fuck you!
84
00:08:07,010 --> 00:08:08,680
MALFUNCTIONING?
85
00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:11,700
I need someone
to trace that call!
86
00:08:12,260 --> 00:08:13,640
But that's impossible!
87
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:15,540
Not for me it isn't.
88
00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:26,070
Hackerman, he's the most
powerful hacker of all time.
89
00:08:29,540 --> 00:08:30,440
Follow me.
90
00:08:34,180 --> 00:08:36,260
I was able to triangulate
the cell phone signal
91
00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:37,420
and trace the caller.
92
00:08:38,980 --> 00:08:40,520
His name is Adolf Hitler.
93
00:08:41,220 --> 00:08:44,520
Hitler, he's the worst
criminal of all time.
94
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:45,720
Do you know him, sir?
95
00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:47,320
I guess you could say that.
96
00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:51,440
In the 1940's,
Hitler was a Kung Fu champion.
97
00:08:51,690 --> 00:08:53,260
He was so good at Kung Fu,
98
00:08:53,340 --> 00:08:56,920
that he decided to change
his name to Kung Fuhrer.
99
00:08:57,860 --> 00:08:59,360
But he didn't stop there.
100
00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:01,640
He knew of
the Kung Fury prophecy,
101
00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:03,440
and wanted to claim the throne.
102
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,740
So he and his posse of
Nazi soldiers
103
00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:07,740
conducted experiments
for years.
104
00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:20,600
But they weren't able
to figure out
105
00:09:20,620 --> 00:09:23,160
how to master the art
of Kung Fury.
106
00:09:23,940 --> 00:09:24,900
And one day,
107
00:09:24,980 --> 00:09:27,000
he disappeared
from the face of the earth.
108
00:09:27,780 --> 00:09:29,740
And no-one has seen him
ever since.
109
00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:31,300
Until now.
110
00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:34,720
I guess he figured if he could
find the chosen one and kill him,
111
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:37,140
he would become
Kung Fury himself.
112
00:09:37,180 --> 00:09:39,320
He must have traveled in time
in order to get here,
113
00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:41,960
that's probably why he
disappeared in the first place.
114
00:09:42,300 --> 00:09:43,820
So, what're you gonna do?
115
00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:45,120
My job.
116
00:09:45,660 --> 00:09:47,980
I'm gonna go back in time
to Nazi Germany,
117
00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:49,760
and kill Hitler,
once and for all.
118
00:09:50,020 --> 00:09:52,000
So, how are you gonna do that?
119
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:53,400
I'm not sure.
120
00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:56,060
I need some sort of
time machine.
121
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:00,880
Wait a minute,
122
00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:03,740
using an RX modulator,
I might be able to conduct
123
00:10:03,750 --> 00:10:06,630
a mainframe cell direct and
hack the uplink to the download.
124
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:07,560
What does that mean?
125
00:10:07,580 --> 00:10:11,270
It means that with the right computer
algorithms, I can hack you back in time.
126
00:10:11,840 --> 00:10:13,200
Just like a time machine.
127
00:10:14,020 --> 00:10:16,540
Well then, it's hacking time.
128
00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:33,860
Oh, no!
129
00:12:34,900 --> 00:12:35,960
Fuck!
130
00:12:36,940 --> 00:12:38,340
That's a Laser-Raptor.
131
00:12:38,460 --> 00:12:40,720
I thought they went extinct
thousands of years ago.
132
00:13:05,260 --> 00:13:06,480
Who are you?
133
00:13:06,720 --> 00:13:07,600
My name,
134
00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:10,640
is Barbarianna.
135
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,240
What year is this?
136
00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:20,000
It's the Viking age.
137
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:22,860
That explains the Laser-Raptor.
Fuck!
138
00:13:23,060 --> 00:13:24,700
I went too far back in time.
139
00:13:25,220 --> 00:13:26,920
You need to get out
of this valley.
140
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,640
This place is swarming
with Laser-Raptors.
141
00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:32,760
I'll meet you at the God's drop.
Katana can help you get there.
142
00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:34,100
Who's Katana?
143
00:13:34,740 --> 00:13:35,920
I'm Katana.
144
00:13:39,660 --> 00:13:41,420
I can give you a ride to Asgard.
145
00:13:41,980 --> 00:13:43,080
A ride on what?
146
00:14:05,820 --> 00:14:07,460
So, who are you?
147
00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:10,440
I'm a cop from the future.
148
00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:13,340
I was sent back in time
to kill Hitler,
149
00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:17,000
but I accidentally went
too far back in time
150
00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:19,120
and ended up in this place.
151
00:14:21,860 --> 00:14:24,720
I know someone
who might be able to help you.
152
00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:32,960
Thor!
153
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:50,380
Behold! It is me, Thor!
154
00:14:50,540 --> 00:14:53,520
Son of Odin
and protector of mankind.
155
00:14:53,580 --> 00:14:55,420
Check out my pecs.
156
00:14:55,580 --> 00:14:56,860
Your pecs are epic.
157
00:14:57,020 --> 00:14:58,160
Thanks bro!
158
00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:05,200
So, anyway.
159
00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:09,060
Thor, this is Kung Fury,
he's a cop from the future.
160
00:15:09,100 --> 00:15:12,640
Yeah, I need to get to
Nazi Germany and kill Hitler...
161
00:15:12,660 --> 00:15:15,040
- so if you could help me with--
- Stop!
162
00:15:16,860 --> 00:15:18,240
Hammer time.
163
00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:26,820
Walk through this portal and
you shall end up in Nazi Germany.
164
00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:29,600
Good luck to you, Kung Fury!
165
00:15:29,640 --> 00:15:30,800
Thanks Thor!
166
00:15:37,460 --> 00:15:39,860
Well,
looks like this is my ride.
167
00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:44,080
Hey, future cop,
where are you going?
168
00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:51,320
You know what.
Here, take my number.
169
00:15:52,260 --> 00:15:54,120
And use this phone to call me.
170
00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,760
It's a personal, transportable,
cellular telephone.
171
00:15:57,940 --> 00:16:00,980
It features 645 channel
capacity,
172
00:16:01,220 --> 00:16:05,460
10 number speed dial,
and an electronic security lock.
173
00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:09,000
This revolution in communication
could make it possible
174
00:16:09,060 --> 00:16:11,960
for more and more people
to have a phone in their car!
175
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:31,940
Tank you.
176
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:45,040
I am the greatest Kung Fu master
of all time,
177
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:46,460
right guys?
178
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:56,380
Thank you!
179
00:18:09,620 --> 00:18:10,980
I'm disarming you.
180
00:18:11,420 --> 00:18:13,660
My arm! My arm!
181
00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:28,680
Kill him!
182
00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:02,120
You don't need that spine,
183
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:06,080
it's holding your back!
184
00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:36,700
A-ha!
185
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,340
Fuck you Kung Fury.
186
00:20:38,620 --> 00:20:41,820
Now nothing can stop me
and my army of death.
187
00:20:54,620 --> 00:20:55,880
Thank you guys!
188
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:04,240
What the fuck?
189
00:21:48,220 --> 00:21:49,520
Kill them!
190
00:22:44,880 --> 00:22:49,480
Alright Hitler, the gig is up,
show me your hands.
191
00:23:08,060 --> 00:23:11,060
Hackerman,
have you seen Kung Fury?
192
00:23:13,140 --> 00:23:16,060
Oh, no! We were too late.
193
00:23:53,100 --> 00:23:54,400
Who the hell are you?
194
00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,720
My name is Cobra.
195
00:23:58,060 --> 00:24:01,620
I've been expecting you,
Kung Fury.
196
00:24:01,760 --> 00:24:03,720
I'm your spirit animal.
197
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:05,720
What the hell is this place?
198
00:24:06,100 --> 00:24:11,080
This is heaven,
I'm afraid you're dead.
199
00:24:11,300 --> 00:24:11,880
What?
200
00:24:12,740 --> 00:24:14,260
But it looks so real.
201
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:19,180
Yeah, no, it's totally real.
202
00:24:19,580 --> 00:24:21,740
Mr. Cobra, I'm a police officer
203
00:24:21,750 --> 00:24:24,700
and I need you to send me
back to earth, pronto.
204
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:27,520
I'm sorry,
I can't help you with that.
205
00:24:27,580 --> 00:24:30,200
You see, you're dead.
206
00:24:30,340 --> 00:24:32,260
- You're under arrest!
- What?
207
00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:37,640
For obstruction of justice,
you're breaking the law!
208
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:52,140
What the hell happened?
209
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:55,280
I hacked away all of
your bullet wounds Kung Fury.
210
00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:56,160
Thanks!
211
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:21,800
I want to welcome you
and your friends to Germany.
212
00:25:24,540 --> 00:25:26,800
We are not so different,
you and I.
213
00:25:27,320 --> 00:25:30,720
I mean we both got
good style, you know?
214
00:25:30,820 --> 00:25:32,580
With Red, you know?
215
00:25:33,140 --> 00:25:34,180
So, that's cool!
216
00:25:36,780 --> 00:25:40,880
We both like doing moves, yah!
Check it out, yah!
217
00:25:41,260 --> 00:25:42,240
Yah!
218
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:46,480
Good, killing people, I love it,
you clearly do, too!
219
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:49,000
And that's cool!
220
00:25:49,820 --> 00:25:50,820
Join me,
221
00:25:51,440 --> 00:25:54,740
we could be brothers,
we are so alike.
222
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:57,700
It's almost like
we finish each other's...
223
00:25:57,720 --> 00:25:59,080
- Balls.
- What?
224
00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:24,260
Oh, my,
not much left of him is there?
225
00:26:24,270 --> 00:26:25,880
The important thing is that
he is gone.
226
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:29,600
Sorry I doubted you Triceracop.
227
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:31,400
You're the best damn partner
I've ever had.
228
00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:34,780
I came back in time
for you Kung Fury,
229
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:37,140
because, damn it,
I love you.
230
00:26:40,980 --> 00:26:44,020
Team work is very important.
231
00:26:45,700 --> 00:26:48,880
So, what happens now, Kung Fury?
232
00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:53,960
Well, I need to
head back to the office.
233
00:26:55,880 --> 00:26:58,360
Looks like it's gonna be
hell of a lot of paperwork.
234
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:22,140
Open the doors, Hoff.
235
00:27:22,380 --> 00:27:25,360
I'm sorry Fury,
I can't let you do that.
236
00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:26,720
Open the doors, Hoff!
237
00:27:27,060 --> 00:27:30,580
I'm sorry, I can't let you
open the doors Kung Fury.
238
00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:32,080
Goddammit, open the doors!
239
00:27:32,220 --> 00:27:34,980
- I'm sorry I can't--
- Open the doors!
240
00:27:36,020 --> 00:27:41,000
Did anyone ever tell you
not to hassle the Hoff 9000?
241
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:44,780
Oh, Hoff 9000,
you son of a bitch.
242
00:27:58,980 --> 00:28:00,300
Piece of shit.
243
00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:19,520
Oh, my,
not much left of him is there?
244
00:28:19,690 --> 00:28:21,880
The important thing is that
he is gone.
245
00:28:34,540 --> 00:28:35,860
Game over.
246
00:28:37,660 --> 00:28:38,640
Wait a minute,
247
00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:42,780
I've seen that symbol before...
248
00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:46,760
somewhere.
249
00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:56,800
Hitler!
17823
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