All language subtitles for The.Adventures.of.Ozzie.and.Harriet.S12E16.Getting.Together.with.the.Boys.1080p.WEB-DL.AMZN.H.264.DDP.2.0_track3_[eng]

- "The Adventures of Ozzie
and Harriet," starring

the entire Nelson family.

Here's Ozzie.

Here's Harriet.

Here's David.

Here's Rick.

And here's June.

And also starring in tonight's
episode, here's Kris.

Tonight's "Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

is brought to you by the dairy
farmer members of the American

Dairy Association.

- You never outgrow your
need for milk's vitality.

- So drink a glass
at every meal.

- Harriet, it looks like we've
got a little problem here.

- What's that?

- Well, I found your mother
under the table again.

- You what?

- Your mother's picture,
it fell out of the album,

and I found it under the table.

- I'll tell her you said that.

Besides it's not my
mother, it's Rick.

- I know, but I thought sounded
funnier with your mother.

Actually, a lot of pictures are
falling out of the album here.

Maybe you ought to get some
paste while you're down

at the market.

- All right, I'll put that down.

- You get a good look
at Rick's haircut there?

- Yeah, how about that?

- How do we ever let
him get away with it?

- Well, he was a very
persuasive young man.

- And a rugged individualist.

Here are about five pictures
of Dave doing handstands.

I think I have more
pictures of him

upside down than we
do right side up.

- That's for sure.

- How come you got
the album out anyway?

- Oh, I don't know.

I just thinking about the boys.

Look at this one
of Dave on a horse.

About two and a half
years old there, isn't he?

Yeah, just about.

- There's Rick at the first
tennis tournament he ever

played in, the 11 and unders.

- Oh, I remember that one.

The racket looks
bigger than he does.

- Yeah, I remember when he
used to coax me out there

to hit some balls with them.

Come to think of it,
they were always at me

to do something like that,
throw the football around,

go swimming.

They were pretty
active little guys.

- They're still pretty active.

- Well, yeah, but
not with the old man.

Somewhere along the
line, they stopped

coaxing me to do
things with them

and kind of ran
me out to pasture.

- Oh, that reminds
me, we need milk.

- That's the way it goes.

I kind of miss
seeing 'em, though.

- And we haven't seen much
of them lately, have we?

- No, we haven't.

But that's the cycle.

As they say, that's life.

You bring up your children.

And all of a sudden, they
grow up and disappear.

- Well, of course,
there's nothing

that says we can't go over
and see them once in a while.

Yeah, but don't forget
they're married now.

They have their
own lives to lead.

- Say, whose side
are you on, anyway?

- Well, both I guess.

One is the civilized,
understanding parent.

And the other is the
selfish, unreasonable father.

- Well, I wouldn't
worry about it.

To me, you'll always be
the thoughtful, considerate

husband.

- OK, give me the list.

I'll go down to
the market for you.

- Oh--

[music playing]

- Oh, good evening, Mr. Nelson.
- Hi, Jack.

- What'll it be?

- Oh, a quart of
vanilla and strawberry.

- OK.
Say, Dave and Rick just came in.

- Oh, really?

- Yeah, they're right over
there on the first booth.

- Oh, yeah.

Hi, fellas.
- Oh, hi, Pop.

- Hi, Pop.
Sit down.

And join us.

- Oh, thanks.

What are you guys
doing down here?

- Well, I promised June I'd
stop off at the market next door

and I bumped into
Rick, so here we are.

- Oh, you guys doing
the family marketing?

- Yeah, I'm afraid so.

- I've been married
for 28 years.

What's your excuse?

- I figured it was better
than cleaning out the garage.

- Or painting the
kitchen chairs.

- Yeah, I guess you
got a point there.

Sure is good to see you guys.

- Yeah, same here.

- Yeah.

- It's been quite a while.

I suppose you fellas see each
other all the time, though.

- No, we were just
talking about that.

I haven't seen Rick
for a couple of weeks.

- We just happened to run
into each other over by the TV

dinners.

- You mean, you guys
are doing the shopping

for frozen dinners?

Doesn't leave much
for the wives.

- Well, somebody's got to stay
home and turn on the oven.

- Shhh, not too loud, there
may be some spies around here.

- I think I like your
hair better like that.

- What do you mean?

I've always worn it this way.

- No, your mother
and I were just

looking at some
pictures of you when you

were about 10 or 11 years old.

- You mean when he was
wearing the porcupine special?

- Yeah, something like that.

- You used to have a pretty
good pompadour yourself,

judging from the
pictures I've seen.

- Well, the winters
were kind of cold

and I couldn't afford a hat.

Hey, I have an idea.

Why don't we go fishing this
weekend, just the three of us?

- Oh, what do you think?

- Gee, I don't know.

- Oh well, it probably wouldn't
be much fun for you guys.

- Oh, well, yeah,
sure it would, sure.

It's just that I don't
know whether June's made

any plans for this weekend.

- See, it's a little
easier for you to get away.

You've been married
longer than we have.

- Yeah, you know the ropes.

Oh, sure I do.

Look at the clever way I got
out of the house tonight.

- Why don't we just see if it's
OK and then I'll let you know?

- OK, I hate to try and
run your lives for you.

But if you leave
it up to the wives,

they'll find
something else to do.

- Well, maybe so, but you
just can't ignore them.

- It is kind of short notice.

- I know that.

It's just that you have to go in
there with a positive attitude.

Don't ask them.

Just tell them you're
going fishing this weekend.

Women like a man who
makes his own decisions.

- Well, at least
we'll give it a try.

- Well, why don't
you give it a try

and let me know how it goes.

- If you don't want
to go, just say so.

- Oh, no, we want to go, Pop.

We'll work something out.

- It's just that we want to do
it as painlessly as possible.

- Yeah, well, whatever
you guys decide.

I think it'd be fun.

It's been so long since we've
spent any time together.

You know, I mean
just the three of us.

Well, why don't you talk
it over and give me a ring

and let me know
what you decide, OK?

- OK, Pop.

- OK, Pop.

- Well, it's nice to
have seen you guys.

- Same here.
- Same here.

- So long.
- See you later.

- Well, looks like we're
going fishing this weekend.

- Yeah, I guess so.

- What's the matter?

You don't sound
too happy about it.

- Well, it's just that it
might be a little inconvenient.

I kind of promised
Kris I'd go shopping

with her Saturday afternoon.

She's been after me to look at a
couple of things for the house.

- Yeah, I think June's got
some sort of plans, too.

- I hate to disappoint
Pop, though.

- Yeah, me too.

I guess it has
been quite a while.

- Yeah.

What do you think
we ought to do?

- Just what Pop said, I guess.

We'll go home and tell the
girls we're going fishing.

- OK.

You tell Kris and
I'll tell June.

- Hey, Rick?

- Yeah?

Yeah, that's a good idea.

- Hi.

- Hi.

How do you like it?

- Oh, looks fine.
I thought we already had dinner.

- I know, but I just want
to see what it looked like.

- Is that a new tablecloth?

- Yeah, I got at the
Emporium for nothing.

- You mean they were
giving them away?

- Yeah, it was a special.

All I had to do was buy the
salad bowl, the bread basket,

the two candles, the cruet,
and the Italian cookbook.

- Oh, is that all?

- And 10 pounds of spaghetti.

- Quite a bargain.

- I thought it'd
be nice if we had

a few friends over for dinner.

- Sure, we can have some
wiener schnitzel and sauerkraut

and have a luau.

- You know what I mean,
an Italian dinner.

And they have a wonderful recipe
in here for spaghetti sauce.

And we have plenty of spaghetti.

- It sounds good to me.

- I better call them
before it gets too late.

Who do you think
I should invite?

- Well, wait a second.

When are you planning
on having this?

- Well, how about
tomorrow night?

- Tomorrow night?

Just a second honey, I have a
little present here for you.

- Oh, how nice.

Well, thank you, honey.

- You're going
fishing this weekend?

- Now, wait a second.

I brought you a present.

Here, have a chocolate.

[muffled speech]

- No talking with
your mouth full.

- So I said to the
boys, look, I don't

want to run your lives for you.

But I'll tell you
this much, a wife

has a lot more respect for a
man who makes his own decisions.

So if you want to go fishing,
don't ask for permission.

Just say I'm going
to go fishing.

Think I'm right?

- Well, I guess so.

You weren't figuring on
going with them, were you?

- Well, yes, I was.

- Well, you can't.

Not this weekend.
- Well, why not?

You didn't make
any plans, did you?

- No, I didn't.

You did.

- Well, what was that?

- You promised
the Randolphs we'd

go over there and see the movies
they took on their vacation

last summer.

- No, no, that's not
for this weekend.

It's for the following weekend.

- It was the following
weekend from last weekend

when you canceled
it the week before.

- Just have to cancel it again.

- Oh, we can't do
that, not again.

We've been stalling
them for six months.

They'll think we don't
want to see their pictures.

- Well, let's face it, I'm
not exactly dying to see them.

Are you?

- Well, no, but we can't
hurt their feelings.

- Well, maybe they
can get somebody else

to come over and look at them.

- Everybody else has
seen them but us.

- Gee, I made such a point
of this in my discussion

with the boys.

It'll be terribly
embarrassing if now I'm

the one who can't go.

- Well, I don't know.

You're the one who made the
plans with the Randolphs.

- I'm probably worrying
about nothing anyway.

I mean, Dave will talk to June
and Rick will talk to Kris,

and they won't be
able to go either.

[phone ringing]

Hello.

Oh, Hi, Dave.

It's Dave.

What's up, son?

- I just thought
I'd call and let

you know everything's
fine for this weekend.

- Oh, what do you mean?

- Oh, for the fishing trip.

- Oh, really?

- Yeah, June was kind
of planning something

for Saturday, but I
talked her out of it.

- Oh, well, look, I wouldn't
want you to do anything

to hurt her feelings.

- Oh, don't worry
about that, Pop.

Everything's fine.

- Oh, well, that's good.

- Just one thing, though.

- Well, that's OK, Dave, we
can make it some other time.

- No, Pop, it's fine.

Besides, I've already
had that argument.

The thing is I need
some fishing gear,

and I thought maybe I'd call
Mr. Randolph and borrow his.

Do you think it would be OK?

- No, no, I wouldn't do that.

- Why not?

- Well, it's probably not going
to work out for this weekend

anyway.

I kind of have a
feeling that Rick's not

going to be able to get away.

- Oh no, Pop, Rick's all set.

- Are you sure?
- Oh, yeah.

You just call me, we're
going to pick you up

at your house at 6:00
tomorrow morning.

- Oh, you're sure now?

- Yeah.

What's the matter?

Is Mom giving you some trouble?

- Well, I'll see you
tomorrow morning.

- What about the fishing gear?

- Well, look, don't
call him Mr. Randolph.

I might be talking
to him myself.

- OK, Pop.

- So long, Dave.

- What happened?

- It looks like the boys
and I are going fishing.

- You are?

- Well, yeah, after the big
discussion I had with them,

I couldn't very well tell
him you wouldn't let me go.

- Well, don't blame me.
I'm not stopping you.

What are we going to
do about the Randolphs?

- Hey, here's an idea.

Why don't you go over
there without me?

- No, sir.
Nothing doing.

- Well, you don't want to
disappoint the boys, do you.

- Well, of course not.

- Well, then you'll just
have to tell the Randolphs

we can't make it.

- No sir, you're wrong again.

You'll have to tell them.

- Well, what could I
possibly say to them?

- Well, you could
tell them the truth.

- Yeah, maybe you're right.

I could tell Joe that much as
we'd love to see the pictures,

that something has come up,
something of a personal nature

within the family.

And we'll just have to
postpone it until next week.

And that's the truth.

Wait a second.

That's what I told
them last week.

- OK, Joe.

- Hi, Oz.

- What's the idea spying on me?

- Spying?

It's my own porch.

Who were you
talking to out here?

- Aren't you going
to invite me in?

- Well, sure, come on in.

No fair peaking, now.

- Peeking at what?

- Sorry, Oz, I can't tell you.

I got a little surprise
for Saturday night.

Oh, well, I guess you
can't see too much anyway.

I'm just re-editing
the vacation films.

I got some titles and
a couple of funny ideas

I'm going to work in.

- Oh, well, listen, Joe--

- Hi, Ozzie.

- Oh, Hi, Clara.

- Did Harriet come
over with you?

- No, she didn't.

- Well, who were you
talking to outside?

- Nobody.

I just came over to see Joe.

- Wait till you see what he's
done with our vacation films.

He's got this shot of
me catching a fish,

and he reversed the film.

- Clara.

- Now the fish jumps
back into the lake.

- For gosh sakes, honey, don't
give away all the funny stuff.

- Oh, well, all right.

But wait till you see it,
you'll just die laughing.

Say, Clara, why don't
you bring in some

of those cookies you made?

- Oh, those are for the
bridge club tomorrow.

- So what?

You can make another
batch for the bridge club.

You know how much
Oz likes cookies.

- No, no, that's OK.

- No, I'll be glad to get them.

- Oh, sure.

- Wait till you see one of
me in the Indian headdress.

- She tells you any
more about the pictures,

there won't be any point
in showing them to you.

- Hey, here's an idea.

As long as I'm here
tonight, why don't you

show them to me right now.
- I can't do that.

They're not ready yet.

- I'll help you
glue them together.

- Hey, cut it out!

You got the canoe race all mixed
up with the pinecone picking

contest.

- Oh, sorry.

- What's all the
big rush anyway?

- Well, I just want
to see the pictures.

Every time I come
over to see them,

you've got some excuse for
not showing them to me.

- Oh, come on, Oz.

You're the one who's
always making the excuses.

- Well, here I am
with no excuses.

Why don't you show them to me?

- I told you they're
not ready yet.

You'll just have to wait
till Saturday night.

- Well, suppose
something happens

and I can't see them again.

- What do you mean,
something happens?

- Well, anything.

Suppose I should break a leg.

- Wouldn't present any problems.

We just stretch
you out on the sofa

and project them on the ceiling.

- I'm serious.

- What could possibly happen?

- Well, a lot of things.

For instance, suppose
Dave and Ricky

insist that I go fishing
with them this weekend.

- I thought you went fishing
with them last weekend.

- No, we didn't go.

- Now, just a second, Oz.

If you don't want to see the
movies after all the trouble

I've gone to, just say so.

- Well, it isn't a question
of not wanting to see them.

- Here are the cookies, fellas.

- Oh, thank you.

- Just a minute.

I want a straight
answer from you.

Do you intend to show up
for the movie Saturday Night

or don't you?

- Well, look, Joe--

That's all I want to know.

These cookies are for
my friends while they're

watching the movies.

- Well, I thought you wanted
me to bring them out now.

- Well, it was my mistake.

- Aren't you even going to
give me a chance to explain?

- Never mind.

- Do you want these
cookies or don't you?

- Well, I may have a few.

But he doesn't get any.

- Well, if you're not
going to pass it around,

I'm going to save them
for my bridge club.

- I thought you we're going
to make the other kind anyway.

- What other kind?

- The kind that
aren't so crummy.

- Are you trying to say
my cookies are crummy?

- I don't mean
they taste crummy.

I mean they crumble easily.

- Well, what exactly
does that mean?

And speaking of
things being crummy,

what about these
pictures you took?

- Harriet.

- Hmm?

- There's no reason why
I should feel guilty

about Joe and Clara.

- What?

- I mean, I have a right to go
fishing with my own two sons

if I want.

It's not my fault he's so darn
touchy about his home movies.

- Mm-hmm.

- OK.

- OK what?

- OK, you think I'm wrong.

Haven't said a word to me
for the past half hour.

- Maybe it's because
I've been asleep.

- Sorry if I woke you up.

Go back to sleep, dear.

- You better get
some sleep yourself.

The boys are going to get here
pretty early, aren't they?

- Yeah.

And I am going
fishing with them.

- Well, you might as well.

It's a cinch we won't be
going over to the Randolphs.

- You are a little annoyed
with me, aren't you?

- No, of course not.

- Yes, you are.

- I am not.

But if you don't let me get to
sleep, maybe I can arrange it.

- Go to sleep, dear.

- Gee, honey, you didn't have
to get up and fix breakfast just

for me.
- I know.

But I wanted to.

- How come you're
lighting the candles?

I just thought it'd be nice.

Besides, I'd like to get
some use out of them.

Here's some jelly.

It's awfully good
with breadsticks.

- Oh, thank you.

- Is there any cream and sugar?

- Right here.

- Thanks.

- [VOICEOVER]
"Have a good time."

"I'll miss you."

"I love you.

Don't forget to
leave the checkbook.

I'm still going shopping."

- Just like old
times, huh, fellas?

- Yeah, I sure hope
the fishing's good.

- Me, too.

- Yeah, but not too good.

I want to have a little
time to talk to you guys.

- Is it about something special?

- No, it's just it's been
quite a while since we've

had a chance to spend any time
together, just the three of us.

- Yeah, it has
been quite a while.

- We'll have a
lot to talk about.

- Yeah, nothing to do but
sit around and talk about it.

- Well, shall we go?

- You guys want anything more?

- Oh, no thanks, Pop.

This is my second breakfast.

- Rick?

- Not for me, I'm fine.

- I hope you fellas didn't have
too much trouble getting away

from the wives.

- June was pretty good about it.

- And so was Kris.

In fact, she left some
cute little notes for me

all around the kitchen.

- Oh, that's good.

I never will forget the first
time I took you guys fishing.

- You mean when Ricky
fell out of the boat?

- Yeah.

I had a big fish on the line.

I didn't know which
one to haul in first.

- Wasn't that the time
David got seasick?

- Yeah, we all got sunburned.

Gee, I remember the first
time I ever went fishing.

I was about five years old.

My brother caught
this little sunfish

and I cried until
he threw him back.

- What's Kris going
to do, go shopping?

- Yeah.

She wanted me to go with
her, but girls usually

wind up with what
they want anyway,

especially if it's
something for the house.

- Yeah.

- Maybe she'll call up June
and they go shopping together.

- Yeah, that'd be good.

At least then I'd
know June's not

sitting around the
house getting mad at me.

- Well, I thought it was OK with
June, for you to go fishing,

I mean.

- Well, she did
mention something

about a spaghetti dinner party.

- Tonight?

- Yeah.

- Oh, gee, I--

it sounds like you guys
would rather not go fishing.

- No, we want to go.

It's just that it turned
out to be a little awkward

this particular weekend.

- Well, I'm sure you've been
married long enough to know

that as far as
wives are concerned,

any weekend is the wrong
weekend to go fishing.

- Sounds like you had a
little trouble with Mom.

- Well, not actually.

Your mother was a little
upset because the Randolph's

will probably never
speak to us again.

- The Randolphs?

- Yeah, we were supposed
to go over their house

and watch some home
movies tonight.

- Gee, that's too bad.

- If we left right now,
I could get home in time

to go shopping with
Kris this afternoon.

- Yeah, then why don't
you come over to our house

and have some spaghetti
when you get back.

- OK, sounds fine.

- How about you and Mom, Pop?

- Hey, here's an idea.

Why don't you bring the
spaghetti dinner over

to our house.

We can invite the
Randolphs over,

and Joe can show his pictures
and everybody would be happy.

- That sounds great.

- Come on, let's go.

- Pardon me.

Did you catch those
up at the lake?

- Oh, no, I bought
them at the market.

- Are you sure?

- Come on, Pop.

- Well, he might
have been kidding.

- Well, wait a minute, Junie,
let me get a pencil and paper.

This is just lovely, Kris.

- Oh, thanks.
Rick was the one who found it.

It was way in the
back of the store.

- Well, you certainly bought
some beautiful things.

- Thank you.

I'm glad he decided
to go with me.

I would have been afraid
to spend that much money.

- I know what you mean.

I think I'll steal
this ashtray from you.

- I'll give it to you
for your birthday.

- I'll take it.

- Well, we're all set,
anytime you're ready good.

- Then what?

- Then add spices and let
simmer for another half hour.

- Add spices--

- All set, Clara?

- Wait a minute,
Junie is giving me

her recipe for that
wonderful spaghetti sauce.

Now add--

- Curtain going up.

- --curtain going up.

Oh, look what you made me
do, add curtain going up.

- Sorry.

- Go talk to the fellas.

- Now, add spices.

- Did I ever tell you guys about
the last time I went fishing

with Doc Williams.
- I don't think so.

- Boy, what a strike.

Just about dragged
me off the pier.

- Was it a trout?

- No, it was a
passing speedboat.

- Movies are all ready, follows.

- The girls still
talking in there?

- What else?

- What are you guys doing?

- Oh, we figured the only
way we'd get any dessert

was to dish it up ourselves.

- Well, whenever you're ready,
the show's about to begin.

- At least we proved
one thing today, boys.

- What was that?

- Well, no matter what you read
in the magazines or newspapers,

it's still a man's world.

We made the decision
to go fishing today,

and we went fishing.

- Only thing though,
we didn't go.

We came back.

- Yes, but we made the
decision to come back,

not the wives, we
made the decision.

You see?

- Whenever you're
ready, fellas, the girls

are waiting to see the pictures.

- We'll get it, Pop.

- OK.

- Here they are.

Where's the ice cream?

- Rick's bringing it in?

How'd you girls know
we were dishing it up?

- Are you kidding?

Why do you think we
were stalling so long?

- It's a man's world.
- Yeah.

- You got any
chocolate there, Dave?

- Yes, dear, this one's yours.
- Thank you.

- You're welcome.
- Oh, I bought some cookies.

They're out in the kitchen.
Somebody get them?

- Oh, I'll get them.
- I'll get them, Dave.

- Dear, would you bring
that chair over here please?

- Oh, OK.

What happened?

- Here we go.

Now here we are
getting on the plane.

It was raining
just a little bit,

but I think it's an
interesting shot.

Now watch this, Clara
almost falls down.

Oops, there she goes.

- Tonight's "Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

was brought to you by the dairy
farmer members of the American

Dairy Association.

- You never outgrow your
need for milk's vitality.

- Join us in a glass now.

[music playing]