All language subtitles for Mean Girls_eng

(SOFT PIANO THEME PLAYS)

This is your lunch,
okay?

Now, I put a dollar in there
so you can buy some milk.

You can ask
one of the big kids
where to do that.

You remember
your phone number?

I wrote it down for you,
just in case.

Put it in your pocket,
I don't want you to lose it.

Okay?

You ready?

I think so.

It's Cady's big day.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

CADY: I guess it's natural
for parents to cry

on their kid's first day
of school.

But, you know, this usually
happens when the kid is five.

I'm 16, and until today,
I was home-schooled.

(SHUTTER CLICKS)

I know what you're thinking.

"Home-schooled kids
are freaks."

X-Y-L-O-C-A-R-P.

Xylocarp.

CADY: Or that we're weirdly
religious or something.

And on the third day,

God created
the Remington
bolt-action rifle

so that man could fight
the dinosaurs.

And the homosexuals.

ALL: Amen.

CADY: But my family's
totally normal.

Except for the fact
that both my parents

are research zoologists

and we've spent the last
12 years in Africa.

I had a great life.

But then my mom
got offered tenure

at Northwestern University.

So it was goodbye Africa

and hello high school.

(SCREAMS)

I'm okay.
Sorry.

I'll be careful.

(RIP HER TO SHREDS PLAYING)

♪ Hey

♪ Oh, you know her

♪ Would you look at that hair?

♪ Yeah, you know her

♪ Check out those shoes

♪ She looks like
she stepped out

♪ Of the middle
of somebody's blues

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

Hi.

I don't know if anyone
told you about me.

I'm a new student here.
My name is Cady Heron.

Talk to me again
and I'll kick your ass.

(CHUCKLING)

JANIS: You don't
wanna sit there.

Kristen Hadley's boyfriend
is gonna sit there.

Hey, baby.

♪ Always looking
to create a scene

JANIS: Uh-uh.

He farts a lot.

♪ Come on, rip her to shreds

♪ She's so dull,
come on, rip her to shreds

♪ She's so dull,
rip her to shreds ♪

MS. NORBURY:
Hey, everybody.

(BOTH EXCLAIMING)

Oh, God,
I'm so sorry.

(CLASS CHATTERING)

MS. NORBURY:
It's not you. I'm bad luck.

(CLASS SNICKERING)

Ms. Norbury?

My t-shirt's stuck
to my sweater, isn't it?

Yeah.

Fantastic.

Is everything all right
in here?

Oh, yeah.

So, uh...

how was your summer?

I got divorced.

Oh.

My carpal tunnel
came back.

I win.

Yes, you do.

Well, I just wanted
to let everyone know

that we have
a new student joining us.

She just moved here
all the way from Africa.

Welcome.

I'm from Michigan.

Great.

Her name is Caddy.
Caddy Heron.

Where are you, Caddy?

That's me.

It's pronounced like Katie.

MR. DUVALL:
My apologies.

I have a nephew
named Anfernee,

and I know how mad he gets
when I call him Anthony.

Almost as mad as I get
when I think about the fact

that my sister
named him Anfernee.

Well, uh, welcome, Cady.

And thank you,
Mr. Duvall.

Well, thank you.

And, uh...

if you need anything
or if you wanna talk
to somebody...

Thanks.

Maybe some other time,

when my shirt
isn't see-through.

Okay.

Okay.
Good day, everybody.

CADY: The first day of school
was a blur.

A stressful, surreal blur.

I got in trouble
for the most random things.

Where are you going?

Oh, I have to go
to the bathroom.

You need the lavatory pass.

Okay.
Can I have the lavatory pass?

(CHUCKLES)
Nice try. Have a seat.

(CLASS SNICKERS)

CADY: I had never lived
in a world where adults
didn't trust me,

where they were
always yelling at me.

Don't read ahead!

No green pen!

No food in class!

(SPEAKS GERMAN)

BOY: I told you,
I saw the whole thing.
Everything.

JASON: Did you see nipple?

It only counts
if you saw a nipple.

BOY 2: That's true, dude.

CADY: I had a lot of friends
in Africa.

Jambo.

What?

CADY: But so far,
none in Evanston.

Hey.
How was your first day?

(SIGHS)

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

Is that your natural
hair color?

Yeah.

It's gorgeous.

Thank you.

See,
this is the color I want.

This is Damian.
He's almost too gay
to function.

Nice to meet you.

Nice wig, Janis.

What's it made of?

Your mom's chest hair!

I'm Janis.

Hi, I'm Cady.

Do you guys know
where Room G14 is?

"Health, Tuesday, Thursday,
Room G14."

I think that's
in the back building.

Oh, yeah, that's
in the back building.

Yeah,
we'll take you there.

Thanks.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

Watch out, please!
New meat coming through!

DAMIAN:
Health. Spanish.

You're taking 12th-grade
calculus?

CADY: Yeah,
I like math.

Eww, why?

Because it's the same
in every country.

That's beautiful.
This girl is deep.

Where's the back building?

It burned down in 1987.

Won't we get in some
sort of trouble for this?

Why would we get you
into trouble?

We're your friends.

CADY: I know it's wrong
to skip class,

but Janis said
we were friends.

And I was in no position
to pass up friends.

I guess I'll never know
what I missed

on that first day
of health class.

Don't have sex.

Because you will
get pregnant and die.

Don't have sex
in the missionary position,

don't have sex standing up.

Just don't do it, promise?

Okay, everybody take
some rubbers.

Why didn't they just keep
home-schooling you?

They wanted me
to get socialized.

Oh, you'll get socialized,
all right.

A little slice
like you.

What are you
talking about?

You're a regulation hottie.

What?

Own it.

How do you spell
your name again, Caddy?

It's Cady.
C-A-D-Y.

Yeah, I'm gonna
call you "Caddy."

In the name
of all that is holy,

will you look
at Karen Smith's gym clothes?

Of course all The Plastics
are in the same gym class.

Who are The Plastics?

They're teen royalty.

If North Shore
was Us Weekly,

they would always be
on the cover.

JANIS: That one there,
that's Karen Smith.

She is one of the dumbest
girls you will ever meet.

Damian sat next to her
in English last year.

She asked me
how to spell "orange."

JANIS: And that little one?
That's Gretchen Wieners.

She's totally rich
because her dad
invented Toaster Strudel.

Gretchen Wieners
knows everybody's business.

She knows everything
about everyone.

That's why her hair is so big.
It's full of secrets.

JANIS: And evil
takes a human form
in Regina George.

Don't be fooled,
because she may seem like

your typical selfish,
back-stabbing,

slut-faced ho-bag.

But in reality,
she is so much more than that.

DAMIAN:
She's the queen bee.

The star. Those other two
are just her little workers.

JANIS: Regina George.

How do I even begin
to explain Regina George?

Regina George is flawless.

She has two Fendi purses
and a silver Lexus.

I hear her hair's insured
for $10,000.

I hear she does
car commercials.
In Japan.

Her favorite movie
is Varsity Blues.

One time,
she met John Stamos
on a plane.

And he told her
she was pretty.

One time, she punched me
in the face.

It was awesome.

She always looks fierce.

She always wins
Spring Fling Queen.

Who cares?

I care.

Every year, the seniors
throw this dance
for the underclassmen

called The Spring Fling.

And whomsoever is elected
Spring Fling King and Queen

automatically becomes head
of the Student Activities
Committee.

And since I am
an active member

of the Student Activities
Committee,

I would say, yeah, I care.

Wow, Damian, you've truly
out-gayed yourself.

Here. This map is gonna
be your guide to North Shore.

Now, where you sit
in the cafeteria is crucial

because you got
everybody there.

You got your freshmen,
ROTC guys,

preps, JV jocks,

Asian nerds.

(UPBEAT TECHNO THEME PLAYS)

JANIS: Cool Asians,

varsity jocks,

unfriendly black hotties,

girls who eat their feelings,

girls who don't eat anything.

Desperate wannabes,

burnouts,

sexually active band geeks.

The greatest people
you will ever meet.

And the worst.
Beware of The Plastics.

Hey. We're doing a lunchtime
survey of new students.

Can you answer
a few questions?

Okay.

Is your muffin buttered?

What?

Would you like us to assign
someone to butter your muffin?

My what?

Is he bothering you?

Jason, why are you
such a skeez?

I'm just being friendly.

(SCOFFS) You were supposed
to call me last night.

Jason. You do not come
to a party

at my house with Gretchen

and then scam on some poor,
innocent girl

right in front of us
three days later.

She's not interested.

Do you wanna
have sex with him?

No, thank you.

Good. So it's settled.

So you can go shave
your back now.

Bye, Jason.

Bitch.

Wait. Sit down.

Seriously, sit down.

Why don't I know you?

I'm new. I just moved here
from Africa.

What?

I used to be home-schooled.

Wait. What?

My mom
taught me at home...

No, no.

I know what home-school is.
I'm not retarded.

So you've actually never been
to a real school before?

Shut up.

Shut up.

I didn't say anything.

Home-schooled.

That's really interesting.

Thanks.

But you're, like,
really pretty.

Thank you.

So you agree.

What?

You think
you're really pretty.

Oh, I don't know...

Oh, my God,
I love your bracelet.
Where did you get it?

Oh, my mom made it for me.

It's adorable.

Oh, it's so fetch.

What is "fetch"?

Oh, it's, like, slang.
From England.

So if you're from Africa...

why are you white?

Oh, my God, Karen,

you can't just ask people
why they're white.

Could you give us some privacy
for, like, one second?

Yeah, sure.

(MOUTHING)

(WHISPERS INAUDIBLY)

Okay, you should just know
that we don't do this a lot,

so this is, like,
a really huge deal.

We wanna invite you
to have lunch with us

every day for the rest
of the week.

Oh, it's okay...

Coolness.

So we'll see you tomorrow.

On Wednesdays, we wear pink.

Oh, my God!
Okay, you have
to do it, okay?

And then
you have to tell me

all the horrible things
that Regina says.

Regina seems sweet.

Regina George is not sweet.

She's a scum-sucking
road whore!
She ruined my life!

She's fabulous,
but she's evil.

Hey, get out of here!

Oh, my God, Danny DeVito.

I love your work!

Why do you hate her?

What do you mean?

Regina.
You seem to really hate her.

Yes.
What's your question?

Well, my question is, why?

Regina started this rumor

that Janis was...

Damian! Shall we not?

Now, look. This isn't about
hating her, okay?

I just think that it would be,
like, a fun little experiment

if you were to hang out
with them

and then tell us everything
that they say.

What do we even talk about?

Hair products.

Ashton Kutcher.

Is that a band?

Would you just do it?
Please?

Okay, fine.
Do you have anything pink?

Yes.

No.

CADY: By eighth period,

I was so happy
to get to math class.

I mean, I'm good at math.
I understand math.

Nothing in math class
could mess me up.

Hey, do you have a pencil
I can borrow?

( LOVE'S THEME PLAYING)

CADY: I've only had
one other crush in my life.

His name was Nfume,
and we were five.

(SPEAKS AFRIKAANS)

(SPEAKS AFRIKAANS)

It didn't work out.

But this one hit me
like a big,
yellow school bus.

MS. NORBURY:
Cady, what do you say?

He was...

So cute.

I mean, A sub N equals
N plus one over four.

That's right.

That's good. Very good.

All right, let's talk
about your homework.

Hey.
How was your second day?

Fine.

Were people nice?

No.

Did you make
any friends?

Yeah.

CADY: Having lunch
with The Plastics

was like leaving
the actual world

and entering "Girl World."

And Girl World had
a lot of rules.

You can't wear a tank top
two days in a row,

and you can only
wear your hair
in a ponytail once a week.

So I guess
you picked today.

Oh, and we only wear jeans
or track pants on Fridays.

Now, if you break
any of these rules,

you can't sit with us
at lunch.

I mean, not just you.
Like, any of us.

Okay, like, if I was wearing
jeans today,

I would be sitting over there
with the art freaks.

Baby Ruth.

Oh, and we always vote
before we ask someone
to eat lunch with us

because you have
to be considerate

of the rest of the group.

Well, I mean,
you wouldn't buy a skirt

without asking
your friends first
if it looks good on you.

I wouldn't?

Right. Oh, and it's
the same with guys.

Like, you may think
you like someone,

but you could be wrong.

120 calories
and 48 calories from fat.

What percent is that?

48 into 120?

I'm only eating foods

with less than
30 percent calories from fat.

It's 40 percent.

Well, 48 over 120
equals X over 100,

and then you cross-multiply
and get the value of X.

Whatever.
I'm getting cheese fries.

So have you seen any guys
that you think are cute yet?

Well, there's this guy
in my calculus class...

Who is it?

It's a senior?

His name's Aaron Samuels.

BOTH: No!

Oh, no, you can't
like Aaron Samuels.

That's Regina's ex-boyfriend.

They went out
for a year.

Yeah, and then she
was devastated

when he broke up with her
last summer.

I thought she dumped him
for Shane Oman.

Okay, irregardless.

Ex-boyfriends are just
off-limits to friends.

I mean, that's just, like,
the rules of feminism.

Don't worry. I'll never tell
Regina what you said.

It'll be our little secret.

MS. NORDBURY:
We define the sum

of the infinite
geometric series...

CADY: Even though I wasn't
allowed to like Aaron,

I was still allowed
to look at him.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

And think about him.

And talk to him.

Hey, Aar...

Hey, you're the Africa girl,
right?

Yeah.
I'm Kevin Gnapoor,

captain
of the North Shore Mathletes.

We participate
in math challenges

against other high schools
in the state,

and we can get twice as much
funding if we've got a girl.

So you should think
about joining.

Oh, you'd be perfect for it.

Yeah, definitely.

Great, great.
Let me give you my card.

Okay,
so think it over.

Because we'd like
to get jackets.

Okay.

(UPBEAT GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING)

♪ Did you ever feel like
you wanna be

♪ Someone else
for just one day?

♪ Did you ever feel like...

Hey!

(CAR HORN HONKS)

Get in, loser.
We're going shopping.

CADY: Regina's like
the Barbie doll
I never had.

I'd never seen anybody
so glamorous.

♪ But I don't care

♪ And I wandered...

KAREN: So how do you like
North Shore?

CADY: It's good.

I think I'm joining
the Mathletes.

No!

No, no.

You cannot do that.
That is social suicide.

Damn, you are so lucky
you have us to guide you.

♪ Me and my selfish ways

♪ Go back to start again ♪

CADY:
Being at Old Orchard Mall

kind of reminded me
of being home in Africa.

By the watering hole.
When the animals are in heat.

(INDISTINCT ANIMAL SOUNDS)

(TRIBAL DRUMS PLAY)

Oh, my God, there's Jason!

KAREN: Where?
Oh, there he is.

(SCOFFS)
And he's with Taylor Wedell.

I heard they're going out.

Wait. Jason's not going out
with Taylor.

No. He cannot blow you off
like that.

He's such a little skeez.

Give me your phone.

You're not gonna
call him, right?

Do you think I'm an idiot?

No.

Wedell on South Boulevard.

Caller ID.

Not when you connect
from Information.

WOMAN: Hello?

Hello.

May I please speak
to Taylor Wedell?

She's not home yet.
Who's calling?

Oh, this is Susan
from Planned Parenthood.

I have her test results.

If you can have her give me
a call as soon as she can.

It's urgent.
Thank you.

(THUD)

She's not going out
with anyone.

Okay,
that was so fetch.

(CELL PHONE RINGS)

Mom.

( MILKSHAKE PLAYING)

♪ The boys are waiting

♪ Na-na-na-na

♪ Warm it up

♪ Na-na-na-na

♪ The boys are waiting...

Wow.
Your house is really nice.

I know, right?

Make sure you check out
her mom's boob job.

They're hard as rocks.

♪ My milkshake brings
all the boys to the yard

I'm home! Hey, Kylie.

Hey.

♪ Damn right, it's better
than yours

Hey, hey, hey!

How are my best girlfriends?

Hey, Mrs. George.
This is Cady.

Hello, sweetheart.

Hi.

Welcome to our home.

(SQUISHING)

(SOFTLY) Ow.

Just want you to know,
if you need anything,

don't be shy, okay?

There are no rules
in this house.

I'm not like
a regular mom.

I'm a cool mom.
Right, Regina?

Please stop talking.

Okay.

I'm gonna make you girls
a "hump day" treat.

♪ My milkshake brings
all the boys to the yard

♪ And they're like,
"It's better than yours"

♪ Damn right, it's better
than yours... ♪

This is your room?

It was my parents' room,
but I made them trade me.

(FUNKY R&B MUSIC PLAYS
OVER RADIO)

REGINA: Hey, put on 98.8.

(GUITAR ROCK MUSIC PLAYS)

Cady, do you even know
who sings this?

Um, the Spice Girls?

I love her.

She's like a Martian.

KAREN: God, my hips are huge!

Oh, please.
I hate my calves.

At least you guys
can wear halters.

I've got man shoulders.

CADY: I used to think
there was just fat and skinny.

Apparently, there's a lot
of things

that can be wrong
on your body.

My hairline is so weird.

My pores are huge.

My nail beds suck.

I have really bad breath
in the morning.

Ew.

Hey, you guys.
Happy hour
is from 4:00 to 6:00!

Thanks.

Um.
Is there alcohol in this?

Oh, God, honey, no.

What kind of mother
do you think I am?

Why? Do you want
a little bit?

'Cause if you're gonna drink,
I'd rather you do it
in the house.

No, thank you.

Okay.

So, you guys,
what is the 411?

What has everybody been up to?

What is the hot gossip?
Tell me everything.

What are you guys
listening to?
What's the cool jams?

Mom.

Could you go fix your hair?

Okay.

You girls keep me young.

Oh, I love you so much.

(DOG GROWLING)

Oh, my God,
I remember this.

I haven't looked at that
in forever.

Come check it out,
Cady.

It's our Burn Book.

See, we cut out
girls' pictures
from the yearbook,

and then we wrote comments.

KAREN: "Trang Pak is a grotsky
little byotch."

REGINA: Still true.

"Dawn Schweitzer
is a fat virgin."

Still half true.

"Amber D'Alessio."
She made out with a hot dog.

"Janis Ian, dyke."

KAREN: Who is that?

GRETCHEN: I think
that's that kid Damian.

Yeah. He's almost
too gay to function.

Ha. That's funny.
Put that in there.

CADY: Oh, no.
Maybe that was only okay
when Janis said it.

And they have this book.

This Burn Book
where they write mean things

about all the girls
in our grade.

What does it say
about me?

You're not in it.

Those bitches.

Will this minimize my pores?

No. Caddy,

you gotta steal
that book.

No way!

Oh, come on.
We could publish it,
and then everybody

would see what an ax-wound
she really is.

I don't steal.

That is for your feet.

Caddy, there are two kinds
of evil people.

People who do evil stuff,

and people who see evil stuff
being done

and don't try to stop it.

Does that mean
I'm morally obligated

to burn that lady's outfit?

Oh, my God,
that's Ms. Norbury.

I love seeing teachers
outside of school.

It's like seeing a dog
walk on its hind legs.

Ah, hey, guys, what's up?
I didn't know you worked here.

Yeah, moderately priced soaps
are my calling.

You shopping?

No. No, I'm just here
with my boyfriend.

Joking.

Sometimes older people
make jokes.

My nana takes her wig off
when she's drunk.

Your nana and I have that
in common.

No, actually,
I'm just here

because I bartend
a couple nights a week

down at P.J. Calamity's.

Cady, I hope you do
join Mathletes, you know,

because we start
in a couple weeks

and I would love
to have a girl on the team,

just, you know, so the team
could meet a girl.

I think I'm gonna do it.

Great.

You can't join Mathletes.
It's social suicide.

Thanks, Damian.

Well, this has been
sufficiently awkward.

And I'll see you guys
tomorrow.

Bye.

Bye.

Oh, man, that is bleak.

So when are you gonna
see Regina again?

I can't spy on her anymore.
It's weird.

Come on, she's never gonna
find out.

It's just...
It'll be like
our little secret.

(PHONE RINGS)

Hello?

I know your secret.

CADY:
Oh, God, busted.

Just start apologizing
and crying. No, play it cool.

Secret?
What are you saying about?

Gretchen told me that
you like Aaron Samuels.

I mean, I don't care,
do whatever you want.

But let me just tell you
something about Aaron...

All he cares about is school
and his mom and his friends.

Is that bad?

But if you like him...

Whatever. I mean,
I could talk to him for you
if you want.

Really?
You would do that?

I mean,
nothing embarrassing,
though, right?

Oh, no, trust me.

I know exactly
how to play it.

But wait. Aren't you so mad
at Gretchen for telling me?

No.

Because if you are,

you can tell me. It was
a really bitchy thing
for her to do.

Yeah, it was pretty bitchy,
but I'm not mad.

I mean, I guess she just
likes the attention.

See, Gretch? I told you
she's not mad at you.

I can't believe you think
I like attention!

Okay, love you.
See you tomorrow.

CADY: I had survived my first
three-way calling attack.

And with Regina's blessing,

I started talking
to Aaron more and more.

On October 3rd, he asked me
what day it was.

It's October 3rd.

Two weeks later,
we spoke again.

It's raining.

Yeah.

But I wanted things
to move faster.

So I followed my instincts.

Hey, um, I'm totally lost.
Can you help me?

But I wasn't lost.

Yeah.

I knew exactly
what Ms. Norbury
was talking about.

It's a factorial,
so you multiply
each one by N.

Wrong.

Is that the summation?

Yeah,
they're the same thing.

Wrong.
He was so wrong.

Thanks.
I, uh... I get it now.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

MS. NORDBURY:
Lights, please.

Okay. See you guys tomorrow.

We're having a Halloween party
at my friend Chris' tonight.

You wanna come?

Yeah, sure.

Great.
Here's where it is.

It's a costume party.
People get pretty into it.

Okay.

That flier admits
one person only,

so don't bring
some other guy with you.

Grool.

I meant to say "cool" and then
I started to say "great."

Right. Well...

grool.

See you tonight.

Hey, Africa. You staying
for the Mathletes meeting?

Uh, yeah,
I'll be right back.

CADY: Okay, I lied.

But I had to go home
and work on my costume.

In the regular world,

Halloween is when children
dress up in costumes

and beg for candy.

In Girl World, Halloween
is the one night a year

when a girl can dress
like a total slut

and no other girls
can say anything about it.

The hard-core girls
just wear lingerie

and some form of animal ears.

MRS. GEORGE: Doesn't she
look great, honey?

What are you?

I'm a mouse.

Duh.

CADY: Unfortunately,
no one told me
about the slut rule.

So I showed up like this.

(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)

Hey.

Yes! Yes!

Hey.

(GASPS)

Why are you dressed
so scary?

It's Halloween.

Have you seen Jason?

You know who's looking
fine tonight?

Seth Mosakowski.

Okay,
you did not just say that.

What?
He's a good kisser.

He's your cousin.

Yeah,
but he's my first cousin.

Right.

So you have your cousins

and then you have
your first cousins,

then you have
your second cousins...

No, honey.
Mmm-mmm.

That's not right, is it?

That is so not right.

AARON: Hey!

Hey.

You made it.

And you are...

a zombie bride.

An "ex-wife."

Love it. Can I get you
something to drink?

Yeah.

Be right back.

Thanks.

Karen, stop it.

Don't, Karen...

Hey, Seth!

Hey.

Oh, no.

Didn't anybody tell you?

You were supposed
to wear a costume.

Shut up.

I need to talk to you.

You know that girl Cady?

Yeah, she's cool.

I invited her tonight.

Well, be careful
because she has
a huge crush on you.

Really?
How do you know?

Because she told me.

She tells everybody.

It's kind of cute,
actually.

She's like
a little girl.

She, like, writes
all over her notebook,

"Mrs. Aaron Samuels."

And she made this T-shirt
that says "I heart Aaron"

and she wears it
under all her clothes.

Oh, come on.

Well, who can blame her?

I mean, you're gorgeous.

And okay, look,
I'm not saying
she's a stalker,

but she saved
this Kleenex you used

and she said
she's gonna do

some kind of African voodoo
with it

to make you like her.

What?

CADY: This was it.

Regina said she would
talk to Aaron for me,
and now she was.

I know she's kind of
socially retarded and weird,

but she's my friend,

so just promise me
you won't make fun of her.

Of course I'm not gonna
make fun of her.

CADY: How could Janis
hate Regina?

She was such a good...

(GASPS)

(SHOUTS) Slut!

What are you doing?
You broke up with me.

That's crazy. Why would
I break up with you?

You're so hot.

(SHRIEKS)

That's a scary mask, bro.

CADY: I had never felt
this feeling before.

I could hear my heartbeat
in my ears.

My stomach felt like it was
going to fall out my butt.

I had this lump in my throat

like after you dry-swallow
a big pill.

I hated Regina. I hated her!

(EERIE, SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC
PLAYS OVER TV)

(SCREAMING)

She took him back.

Regina took Aaron back.

Oh, no, Caddy.

Why would she do that?

Because she's a life-ruiner.

She ruins people's lives.

When we were 13, she made
people sign this petition

saying that Janis was...

Damian! Please!

Look, she's not gonna get away
with this again, okay?

We're gonna do something.

We are?

Regina George
is an evil dictator.

Now, how do you overthrow
a dictator?

You cut off her resources.

Regina would be nothing
without her high-status
man candy...

technically good physique...

...and ignorant band
of loyal followers.

Now, Caddy, if we want this
to work,

you are gonna have to keep
hanging out with them

like nothing is wrong.

Can you do it?

I can do it.

Okay, let's rock this bitch.

CADY: Pretending like
nothing was wrong

turned out to be
surprisingly easy.

...and Regina wanted me
to tell you

that she was trying
to hook you up with Aaron,

but he was just interested
in getting her back.

And that's not
Regina's fault.

No, I know.

Okay, so you're not
mad at Regina?

God, no.

Oh, okay, good.

Because Regina wanted me
to give you this.

It's called
the South Beach Fat Flush,

and all you drink is
cranberry juice for 72 hours.

This isn't even
cranberry juice.

It's cranberry juice cocktail.
It's all sugar.

I wanna lose three pounds.

You're crazy.

Why do you wear
your hair like that?

You hair looks
so sexy pushed back.

Cady, will you please tell him
his hair looks sexy
pushed back.

CADY: Regina was
dangling Aaron
in front of me on purpose.

I knew how this would be
settled in the animal world.

(GROWLS FERALLY)

(EXCITED INDISTINCT
ANIMAL SOUNDS)

CADY: But this was Girl World.

Your hair looks sexy
pushed back.

And in Girl World,
all the fighting
had to be sneaky.

All this cranberry juice
is making me break out.

( ONE WAY OR ANOTHER PLAYING)

Wait. I have this
really good skin stuff
I'll bring you.

Okay.

CADY: We kept our eyes open
for opportunities
for sabotage.

Regina.

Here you go.

Thank you.

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna find you

Hey.

Hey.

♪ Get you, get you
get you, get you

♪ One way or another
I'm gonna win you

Your face smells
like peppermint.

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna see you ♪

♪ I'm gonna meet you, meet you
meet you, meet you

♪ One day
maybe next week

♪ I'm gonna meet you

♪ I'm gonna meet you
I'll meet you

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna get you,
I'll get you
I got to get you

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna get you,
I'll get you
I got to get you

♪ Get you, get you
One way or another

♪ I'm gonna get you... ♪

JANIS:
This is ass, you guys.

It's been a month,
and all we've done

is make Regina's face
smell like a foot.

I've been really busy
with choir.

We gotta crack
Gretchen Wieners.

If we crack Gretchen,
then we crack the lock

on Regina's whole
dirty history.

Say "crack" again.

Crack.

All right,
let's reconvene tonight.

I can't.

I have to go to Regina's
to practice
for the talent show.

We're doing a dance
to this song...

BOTH:
Jingle Bell Rock.

You guys
know that song?

Everybody
in the English-speaking world
knows that song.

They do it every year.

Well,
I have to learn it.

Uh-oh. Go.

Hey.

Why were you talking
to Janis Ian?

I don't know, I mean,
she's so weird.

She just, you know,
came up to me

and started talking
to me about crack.

She's so pathetic.

Let me tell you something
about Janis Ian.

We were best friends
in middle school.

I know, right?

It's so embarrassing.
I don't even...

Whatever.

So then in eighth grade,

I started going out
with my first boyfriend, Kyle,

who was totally gorgeous,
but then he moved to Indiana.

And Janis was, like,
weirdly jealous of him.

Like, if I would blow her off
to hang out with Kyle,

she'd be like,
"Why didn't you call me back?"

And I'd be like,
"Why are you
so obsessed with me?"

So then,
for my birthday party,

which was an all-girls
pool party,

I was like,
"Janis, I can't invite you,

"because I think
you're a lesbian."

I mean, I couldn't have
a lesbian at my party.

There are gonna be girls there
in their bathing suits.

I mean, right?
She was a lesbian.

So then her mom called my mom
and started yelling at her.

It was so retarded.

And then she dropped out
of school

because no one would
talk to her.

When she came back
in the fall for high school,

all of her hair was cut off
and she was totally weird,

and now I guess
she's on crack.

Oh, my God!
I love your skirt.

Where did you get it?

Uh, it was my mom's
in the '80s.

(GASPS) Vintage.
So adorable.

Thanks.

That is the ugliest
F-ing skirt
I've ever seen.

Oh, my God,
I love your bracelet.

Where did you get it?

So are you gonna send
any candy canes?

No. I don't send them,
I just get them.

So you better
send me one, byotch.

Love you.

CADY: I was definitely
sending her one.

I was gonna use
three candy canes

to crack Gretchen Wieners.

Three, please.

"Why, man, he doth bestride

"the narrow world
like a colossus"

might translate into

"Why is he so huge
and obnoxious?"

Ho, ho, ho, ho!

Candy cane-grams!

Okay, hurry up.

Taylor Zimmerman?
Two for you.

Glenn Coco?

Four for you, Glenn Coco.
You go, Glenn Coco.

And, uh, Caddy Heron.

Do we have a Caddy Heron here?

It's Cady.

Oh, Cady, here you go.

One for you.

Um.

And none
for Gretchen Wieners. Bye.

Who's that from?

"Thanks for being
such a great friend.
Love, Regina."

That's so sweet.

TEACHER:
Okay, back to Caesar.

CADY: Once Gretchen thought
Regina was mad at her,

the secrets started
pouring out.

All I had to do was wait
for one we could use.

MR. DUVALL:
Thank you.

(APPLAUSE)

Welcome to
the North Shore High School
winter talent show.

Let me hear you
make some noise.

(EXCITED CHEERING
AND APPLAUSE)

All right, settle down.

Our first act calls himself
a star on the rise.

Let's hear it for Damian.

(PIANO PLAYS)

(INAUDIBLE)

Don't look at me.

♪ Every day is so wonderful

I mean, why would Regina
send you guys candy canes
and not me?

Maybe she forgot
about you.

Yeah, Regina has been acting
kind of weird lately.

I mean, is something
bothering her?

Well, I mean,
her parents

totally don't sleep
in the same bed anymore,

if that's what you mean.

Oh, my God.
Don't tell her
I told you that.

♪ I am beautiful

♪ In every single way

♪ Yes, words can't
bring me down

♪ Don't you bring me down
today ♪

I mean, no offense,

but why would she send
you a candy cane?

She doesn't even
like you that much.

Maybe she feels
weird around me

because I'm the only person
that knows about her nose job.

Oh, my God.
Pretend you didn't hear that.

♪ Yo, yo, yo

♪ All you sucker MCs

♪ Ain't got nothing on me

♪ From my grades to my lines

♪ You can't touch Kevin G

♪ I'm a Mathlete
so nerd is inferred

♪ But forget what you heard
I'm like James Bond III

♪ Shaken not stirred
I'm Kevin Gnapoor

♪ The G is silent
when I sneak in your door

♪ And make love to your woman
on the bathroom floor

♪ I don't play it like Shaggy
you'll know it was me

♪ Because the next time
you see her she'll be like

♪ Oh, Kevin G! ♪

MR. DUVALL:
Thank you, Kevin,
that's enough.

Happy holidays, everybody.

(CROWD JEERS AND HISSES)

(APPLAUSE)

MR. DUVALL:
K.G. and the Power of Three.

That was something.

Does it bother you
that they still use
your original choreography?

Shut up.

Damn.

What?

I'd rather see you out there

shaking that thing.

Uh, Gretchen,
switch sides with Cady.

But I'm always
on your left.

Well, that was
when there were
three of us,

and now the tallest
go in the middle.

But the whole dance
will be backwards.

I'm always on your left.

And right now you're getting
on my last nerve. Switch.

MR. DUVALL: And finally,
please welcome to the stage

Santa's Helpers
doing Jingle Bell Rock.

(APPLAUSE)

(MUSIC PLAYS)

♪ Jingle bell, jingle bell
jingle bell rock

♪ Jingle bells swing
and jingle bells ring

♪ Snowin' and blowin' up
bushels of fun

♪ Now the jingle hop has begun

♪ Jingle bell, jingle bell
jingle bell rock

♪ Jingle bells chime
in jingle bell time

♪ Dancin' and prancin'
in jingle bell square

♪ In the f... ♪

(CD SKIPPING)

(CROWD GASPS)

Jason?

♪ What a bright time
it's the right time

♪ To rock the night away

(CROWD STARTS TO SING ALONG)

♪ Jingle bell time
is a swell time

♪ To go riding
in a one-horse sleigh

(PIANO PLAYS)

♪ Giddyap jingle horse
pick up your feet

♪ Jingle around the clock

♪ Mix and mingle
in a jingling beat

♪ That's the jingle bell

♪ That's the jingle bell

♪ That's
the jingle bell rock ♪

(EXCITED APPLAUSE)

That was the best
it ever went!

That was awesome.

Ah. Lip gloss.

Hey, good job, Africa.

Thanks.

GRETCHEN: Cady's blushing.
Oh, my God.

You totally have
a crush on that guy.

No, I don't.

That's why you wanted
to join the Mathletes.

Mathletes? You hate math.

GRETCHEN:
Look how red she is.

You love him.
And he totally
complimented you.

That is so fetch.

Gretchen, stop trying
to make "fetch" happen.

It's not going to happen.

"Why should Caesar get
to stomp around like a giant

"while the rest of us
try not to get smushed

"under his big feet?"

"What's so great about Caesar?

"Brutus is just as cute
as Caesar.

"Okay, Brutus is just
as smart as Caesar.

"People totally like Brutus
just as much
as they like Caesar.

"And when did it become
okay for one person

"to be the boss of everybody?
Huh?

"Because that's not
what Rome is about!

(SHOUTS)
"We should totally
just stab Caesar!"

CADY:
Gretchen Wieners had cracked.

Okay, if you even knew
how mean she really is.

You know that I'm not allowed
to wear hoop earrings, right?

Yeah. Two years ago,

she told me
that hoop earrings
were her thing

and that I wasn't allowed
to wear them anymore.

And then for my Hanukkah,
my parents got me this pair

of really expensive
white-gold hoops.

And I had to pretend
like I didn't even like them,

and it was so sad.

And you know
she cheats on Aaron?

Yes. Every Thursday he thinks
she's doing SAT prep.

But really, she's hooking up
with Shane Oman

in the projection room
above the auditorium,

and I never told anybody that,
because...

I'm such a good friend.

CADY: Jackpot.

Gretchen's secret had put
the plan back in motion.

After Christmas break,
we tried every Thursday

to help Aaron catch Regina
in the act.

( ONE WAY OR ANOTHER PLAYING)

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna find you

♪ I'm gonna get you,
get you, get you, get you

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna win you

♪ I'm gonna get you,
get you, get you, get you

♪ One way or another

♪ I'm gonna see you

♪ I'm gonna meet you,
meet you, meet you, meet you ♪

Hey.

Hey, what's up?

My purse!

Looks like he's headed
for the projection room

above the auditorium!

AARON:
Coach Carr?

Trang Pak?

Guys, why did we think
we could do this?
We're amateurs.

No, we just have to regroup.
Think outside our box.

What are Kalteen Bars?

They're these weird
Swedish nutrition bars.

My mom used to give them
to the kids in Africa

to help them gain weight.

They're these weird
nutrition bars

my mom uses to lose weight.

Give me it.

It's all in, like, Swedish
or something.

Yeah, you know, there's some
weird ingredient in them

that's not legal
in the US yet.

Ephedrine?

No.

Phentermine.

No.

It burns carbs.

It just burns up
all your carbs.

I really wanna
lose three pounds.

Oh, my God,
what are you talking about?

You're so skinny.

Shut up.

Yes!

CADY: The weird thing about
hanging out with Regina

was that I could hate her,
and at the same time,

I still wanted her to like me.

Okay. You have
really good eyebrows.

Thanks.

Move.

CADY: Same with Gretchen.
The meaner Regina was to her,

the more Gretchen
tried to win Regina back.

She knew it was better to be
in The Plastics, hating life,

than to not be in at all.

Because being
with The Plastics
was like being famous.

People looked at you
all the time,

and everybody
just knew stuff about you.

That new girl
moved here from Africa.

I saw Cady Heron wearing
Army pants and flip-flops,

so I bought Army pants
and flip-flops.

That Cady girl is hot.

She might even be hotter
than Regina George.

I hear Regina George
is dating Aaron Samuels again.

The two were seen canoodling
at Chris Eisel's
Halloween party.

They've been inseparable
ever since.

(THUD)

(SCREAMS)

CADY: I was a woman possessed.

I spent about 80 percent
of my time
talking about Regina.

And the other 20 percent
of the time,

I was praying for someone else
to bring her up

so I could
talk about her more.

She's not
even that good-looking
if you really look at her.

I don't know.
Now that she's getting fatter,

she's got pretty big jugs.

CADY: I could hear people
getting bored with me.

But I couldn't stop.

It just kept coming up
like word vomit.

I have this theory that if
you cut all her hair off,

she'd look like
a British man.

Yeah, I know.

You told me that one before.

Oh.

Hey, I'm having
an art show.

So why don't you take a night
off from your double life.

I want you to see it.

Coolness.

(SNIFFS)

What is that smell?

Oh, Regina gave me
some perfume.

You smell like
a baby prostitute.

Thanks.

CADY: Meanwhile, I was finding
any excuse I could

to talk to Aaron.

I don't get this.
Do you get any of this?

Nice job, Cady.

Kind of seems like
you get it.

CADY: If I was gonna
keep this going,

I was gonna have to
really commit.

MS. NORBURY: Not your best.

Damn, Africa,
what happened?

How'd you do?

Not so good.

You know, I think
I need a tutor.

I'll tutor you, if you
ever wanna get together
after school or something.

Do you think
Regina would mind?

No.
You guys are friends.

Well, maybe we just
won't tell her.

CADY: So, what did you
get for this one?

Well, the first time
I did it, I got a zero.

CADY: Wrong.

But then when I checked it,
I got...

one.

There you go.

I got one too.

Yeah, you have to check it
because sometimes the product

of two negative integers
is a positive number.

Yeah, like negative four
and negative six.

That's right. That's good.

Well, you're a good tutor.

Man, um, look, I...

I can't do this.

It's not fair to Regina.

Why do you like her?

Look, I know
she can be really mean
sometimes, but...

Then why do you like her?

Why do you?

Look, there's good and bad
to everybody. Right?

Regina's just...

She's just more up-front
about it.

CADY: Oh, no.
It was coming up.

The word vomit.
I didn't mean
to say it, but...

She's cheating on you!

What?

Did he say why?

Somebody told him
about Shane Oman.

Who?

REGINA: He said some guy
on the baseball team.

Baseball team?

I gave him everything.

I was half a virgin
when I met him.

You wanna do something fun?

You wanna go to Taco Bell?

I can't go to Taco Bell,

I'm on an all-carb diet.

God, Karen, you are so stupid!

Regina, wait. Talk to me.

REGINA: Nobody understands me.

GRETCHEN: I understand you.

You're not stupid,
Karen.

No.
I am, actually.

I'm failing
almost everything.

Well, there must be something
you're good at.

I can put my whole fist
in my mouth.

Wanna see?

No. That's okay.

Anything else?

I'm kind of psychic.

I have a fifth sense.

What do you mean?

It's like I have ESPN
or something.

My breasts can always tell
when it's gonna rain.

Really? That's amazing.

Well, they can tell
when it's raining.

CADY: I have to admit,
I was mildly horrified

when Aaron didn't immediately
ask me to be his girlfriend.

I mean, I know he was sad,
but how much time did he need?

Regina had moved on.

(FUNKY R&B MUSIC PLAYS)

Do you guys need anything?
Some snacks?

A condom?

Let me know.
Oh, God love you.

CADY: B ut overall, the plan
was going pretty well.

Aaron had dumped Regina,
and she was unknowingly

eating 5,000 calories a day.

It was time to turn
our attention

to the army of skanks.

WOMAN ON TV:
And finally, the nominees

for Spring Fling Queen
are as follows...

Regina George.

(APPLAUSE)

Gretchen Wieners.

Janis Ian.

What is happening
to the world?

(LAUGHS)

And the final nominee...

I couldn't help myself.
It was so easy.

...is Cady Heron.

Damian, you put me
in there too?
That's not part of the plan.

I didn't put you in there.

You mean I'm really nominated?

CADY: In January,
Regina had put
a Spring Fling dress on hold

at a store called 1-3-5.

But being Plastic,
she needed our advice

before she could
actually buy it.

REGINA:
Can someone zip me up?

It won't close.

It's a 5.

Okay,
it must be marked wrong.

Cady, all I've been eating
are these Kalteen bars.
They suck.

No, no, this is just how
they work.

This is all your water weight.

First you bloat, and then you
drop ten pounds like that...

Well, the Kalteen bars
have burned up all your carbs,

and now your body's
just running on water.

But once the water's gone,
then you'll be all muscle.

It explains it all
on the label.

You know Swedish?

Yeah, everyone in Africa
can read Swedish.

Ma'am, do you have this
in the next size up?

Sorry. We only carry
sizes 1, 3 and 5.

You could try Sears.

(GASPS)

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

MS. NORBURY:
Cady.

I need your parents
to sign this

so they know that
you're failing.

Failing?

You know what's weird
about your quizzes, Cady,

is that all the work is right
and just the answers
are wrong.

Really?

Really.

Cady, I know that
having a boyfriend

may seem like
the most important thing
in the world right now,

but you don't have to
dumb yourself down

to get guys to like you.

CADY: How would you know?

I know,

"How would I know", right?

I'm divorced.
I'm broke
from getting divorced.

The only guy
that ever calls my house

is Randy from Chase Visa.

And you know why?

Because I'm a pusher.
I push people.

I pushed my husband
into law school.
That was a bust.

I pushed myself
into working three jobs.

And now I'm gonna push you

because I know
you're smarter than this.

Thanks, Ms. Norbury.

And if there's anything
I can do for extra credit,
please let me know.

Oh, I will.

I hate her! I mean,
she's totally failing me
on purpose

because I didn't join
those stupid Mathletes!

She was so queer.

She was like, "I'm a pusher,
Cady. I'm a pusher."

(LAUGHS)

What does that even mean?

Like a drug pusher?

Probably.

She said
she works three jobs.

You know,
I bet she sells drugs
on the side

to pay
for her pathetic divorce.

You let it out,
honey.

Put it in the book.

CADY: I know it may look
like I'd become a bitch,

but that's only because
I was acting like a bitch.

JANIS: Hey,
I called you last night.

How come you didn't
call me back?

Oh, I got busy. Sorry.

So you need a ride
to my art show this weekend?

No. I have to go to Madison
with my parents.

I'm so sorry.

Well, you wanna
watch a movie tonight?

Can't. I'm doing
major Plastic sabotage
tonight.

But we don't have
anything planned for tonight.

Oh, I planned this one
on my own.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

Love you. Bye.

Gretchen thinks
you're mad at her

because she's running
for Spring Fling Queen.

Oh, my God,
I'm not mad at her.

I'm worried about her.

I think somebody nominated her
as a joke or something.

And when nobody
votes for her,

she's gonna have
a total meltdown.

And who's gonna have
to take care of her? Me.

So you don't think
anyone will vote for her?

Cady,
she's not pretty.

I mean, that sounds bad,
but whatever.

The Spring Fling Queen
is always pretty.

And the crazy thing is
is that it should be Karen,

but people forget about her
because she's such a slut.

Anyway, I gotta go.
I'm going to bed.

Well, she's not mad at you.

Hold on.

Are you okay?

Shh.

(DIALS PHONE)

(PHONE RINGS)

Hello?

If someone said
something bad about you,

you'd want me
to tell you, right?

No.

What if it was someone

you thought was your friend?

What are you...

(PHONE BEEPS)

Hold on. Other line.

I'm not taking this anymore.

Good for you, Gretch.

Hello?

Let's go out.

Okay. Hold on.
I'm on the other line
with Gretchen.

Don't invite Gretchen.
She's driving me nuts.

Hold on.

Okay, hurry up.

It's Regina.

She wants to hang out
with me tonight,

but she told me
not to tell you.

Do not hang out with her.

Why?

You don't want me
to tell you.

You can tell me.
Hold on.

Oh, my God,
she's so annoying.

Who is?

Who's this?

Gretchen.

Right. Hold on.

Oh, my God,
she's so annoying.

I know.
Just get rid of her.

Okay.
What is it?

Regina says everyone hates you
because you're such a slut.

She said that?

You didn't hear it
from me.

Little harsh,
Gretch.

Whatever.
She has a right to know.

I can't go out.

(COUGHS SOFTLY)

I'm sick.

Boo. You whore.

Regina,

we have to talk to you.

Is butter a carb?

Yes.

Regina, you're wearing
sweatpants.

It's Monday.

So?

So that's against the rules

and you can't sit with us.

Whatever.
Those rules aren't real.

They were real
that day I wore a vest.

Because that vest
was disgusting.

You can't sit with us!

These sweatpants are all
that fits me right now.

Fine.

You can walk home, bitches.

Watch where you're going,
fat-ass!

(STUDENTS LAUGHING)

CADY: Gretchen and Karen
followed me around
all afternoon.

So, what are we doing
this weekend?

Yeah,
what are we doing?

Oh, I have to go to Madison
with my parents.

What...

We have tickets
for this thing.

What?

What?

CADY: Was I the new queen bee?

I can try and get out of it.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Because I told my friend Janis
I'd go to her art show.

We've had these tickets
for months.

You love
Ladysmith Black Mambazo.

But she's my friend,
and I made her a promise.

I think Cady's old enough
to spend one night on her own.

CADY: I had learned
how to control
everyone around me.

Hey. I'm having
a small get-together
at my house tomorrow night.

Is Regina going?

No.
Do you think I'm an idiot?

No, it's just gonna be
a few cool people,

and you better be
one of them, byotch.

Fine, I'll go.

Shut up.

I love that shirt on you.

CADY: Aaron Samuels
was going to be
in my house at my party.

Everything had to be perfect.

And this time
when Aaron saw me,

I wouldn't be caught
in some ridiculous costume.

Hey, guys.

(GASPS)

BOTH:
You look awesome!

I know, right?

Okay, so I got enough cheese
and crackers for eight people.

Do you think that's enough?

Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Okay.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

(SQUEALS)

CADY: It was not enough.

Somehow, the word
had gotten out

about my small get-together.

Jason is here
with Taylor Wedell.

He's just using her
to make you mad.

Have you guys seen Aaron yet?

No.

Dude, put on
The Ramayana Monkey Chant.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Do I know you?

Deek! What up, dog?

She thinks she's gonna have
a party and not invite me?

Who does she think she is?

You're right, hon.

I, like, invented her,
you know what I mean?

GRETCHEN: Jason.

I have to talk to you.

(THUD)

Whatever.

GRETCHEN: I love you.

JASON: I know, I know.

Hey! Put that down!

CADY: Was Aaron
blowing me off?

What's up?
Gretchen came to talk to me.

Oh, no.

Look,

I don't wanna hurt
your feelings,

but I only date
women of color.

I have to pee.

Get out.

Oh, ow.

Hey.

Hey.

I've been looking
for you everywhere.

Me too.

Wow.

You look, um...

New clothes?

Thanks.

You wanna go downstairs?

No, no. Let's stay here.

Thanks for getting me
to come out tonight.

Yeah, sure, no problem.

I wasted too much time
being pissed off at Regina.

No more liars.

I would never lie to you.

I know, I know.

Although...

Okay, listen.
I mean, I did lie to you once,

but you're totally gonna laugh
when I tell you, so...

Tell me what?

I pretended to be bad at math
so that you'd help me.

But the thing is,
I'm not really bad at math.

I'm actually really good
at math.

You're kind of bad at math.

Anyways, now I'm failing.
Isn't that funny?

Wait. You're failing
on purpose?
That's stupid.

No. Not on purpose.
Just, you know...

I just wanted a reason
to talk to you.

So why didn't you
just talk to me?

Well, because I couldn't.
Because of Regina.

Because you were
her property...

Her property?

No. Shut up.
Not her property...

No, don't tell me
to shut up.

I wasn't...

God, you know what?

You are just like
a clone of Regina.

Oh, no, no, listen to me.
You're not listening to me...

CADY: Oh, no.
It was coming up again.

Word vomit.
No, wait a minute...

What is this?

Actual vomit.

(VOMITS)

Eww.

CADY: Aaron!

Aaron, wait!
Just...

Okay. Call me.

Oh, God.

You dirty little liar.

I'm sorry.
I can explain.

Explain how you forgot
to invite us to your party?

Janis, I cannot stop this car.
I have a curfew.

You know I couldn't
invite you. I had
to pretend to be Plastic.

Hey, buddy, you're not
pretending anymore.
You're Plastic.

Cold, shiny, hard Plastic.

DANIEL: Curfew, 1:00 a.m.
It is now 1:10.

Did you have
an awesome time?

Did you drink awesome shooters
and listen to awesome music,

and then just sit around
and soak up
each other's awesomeness?

You know what? You're the one
who made me like this

so you could use me
for your eighth-grade revenge.

God! See, at least
me and Regina George
know we're mean.

You try to act
like you're so innocent.

Like,
"Oh, I used to live in Africa

"with all the little birdies
and the little monkeys."

You know what?
It's not my fault

you're in love with me
or something!

What?

Oh, no she did not!

See? That is the thing
with you Plastics.

You think that everybody
is in love with you,

when actually,
everybody hates you.

Like Aaron Samuels,
for example.

He broke up with Regina
and guess what.

He still doesn't want you.

So why are you still
messing with Regina, Cady?

I'll tell you why.

Because you are a mean girl!

You're a bitch!

Here. You can have this.
It won a prize.

And I want
my pink shirt back!

I want
my pink shirt back!

(SUBDUED AFRICAN MUSIC PLAYS)

Hon, slow down.

It's like I can't trust
anyone anymore.

Why are you eating
a Kalteen bar?

I'm starving.

Man, I hate those things.

Coach Carr makes us eat those

when we wanna move up
a weight class.

What?

They make you gain weight
like crazy.

Motherf...

(SPITS)

(SCREAMS)

(DOGS HOWLING IN DISTANCE)

(SCREAMING)

(CONTINUES SCREAMING)

This girl is the

nastiest skank bitch

I've ever met.

Do not trust her.

She is a fugly slut!

(CRYING)

I found it
in the girls' bathroom.

It's so mean, Mr. Duvall.

Is this true?

Trang Pak made out
with Coach Carr?

Good Lord.

What's that say?
"Kaitlyn Caussin is a..."

Fat whore.

Okay, calm down,
Miss George.

Why would someone write that?
That's just so mean.

Don't worry, we're gonna
find out who did it.

There's only three girls
in the whole school
who aren't in it.

At your age, you're gonna
be having a lot of urges.

You're gonna want to take off
your clothes

and touch each other.

But if you do
touch each other,

you will get chlamydia.

And die.

STUDENT: Coach Carr.

Cady Heron, they wanna see you
in the principal's office.

STUDENTS: Woo.

All right, chlamydia. K-L-A...

In here, Miss Heron.

What's going on?

Have a seat, Miss Heron.

Have you ever
seen this before?

CADY: No.

I mean, yes, I've seen it
before, but it's not mine.

You better get your story
straight, Miss Heron,

because I'm not messing
around here.

It's not ours,
it's Regina's.

Yeah, she's trying to make it
look like we wrote it,

but really, she wrote it.

Miss Wieners,
why would Regina

refer to herself
as a "fugly slut"?

(SNICKERS)

Miss Smith, this is no time
to be laughing.

We're gonna get to the bottom
of this right now.

Maybe we're not in that book
because everybody likes us.

And I don't wanna be punished
for being well-liked.

And I don't think my father,
the inventor
of Toaster Strudel,

would be too pleased
to hear about this.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

"Made out with a hot dog"?

Oh, my God,
that was one time!

"Dawn Schweitzer
has a huge ass"?

Who would write that?

Who wouldn't write that?

"Trang Pak made out
with Coach Carr"?

And so did Sun Jin Dinh.

(SPEAKS VIETNAMESE)

Hey! Hey! Settle down!
All right, hey.

No. You do not push and sh...

MR. DUVALL: Do you have
anything else you wanna say?

No, I can't answer
any more questions

until I have a parent
or lawyer present.

Miss Smith?

Whoever wrote it
probably didn't think
anyone would ever see it?

I hope that nobody else
ever does see it.

(EXCITED TRIBAL MUSIC PLAYING)

Mom, can you pick me up?
I'm scared.

"Janis Ian, dyke"?

Oh, that's original.

"Too gay to function"?

Hey!

That's only okay
when I say it.

Did you write this?

No, I swear!

Then you told somebody!

She told!

You little bitch!

You're a bitch!

Yeah!
Take your top off!

Now, here's what
we're gonna do...

Ron, come quick!

They've gone wild.
The girls have gone wild.

CADY: I t was full-tilt
jungle madness.

(LIONS ROARING)

And it wasn't going away.

Hey, I pulled these two
off each other.

Coach Carr, step away
from the underage girls.

Let me help you down there.

Hell, no! I did not leave
the Southside for this!

(GLASS SHATTERS, ALARM RINGS)

(GIRLS SCREAM)

Oh, crap! My hair!

All junior girls report
to the gymnasium immediately!

Immediately!

(CHATTERING)

CADY: Have you ever
walked up to people

and realized they were just
talking about you?

Have you ever had it happen
60 times in a row?

I have.

(CHATTERING STOPS)

(MOUTHS)

Never in my 14 years
as an educator

have I seen such behavior.

And from young ladies.

I got parents calling me
on the phone

asking,
"Did someone get shot?"

I ought to cancel
your Spring Fling.

GIRLS: No!

What are we supposed
to do?

Now, I'm not gonna do that,

because we've already
paid the DJ.

But don't think that I'm not
taking this book seriously.

Coach Carr has fled
school property.

Ms. Norbury has been
accused of selling drugs.

Now, what the young ladies
in this grade need

is an attitude makeover.

And you're gonna get it
right now.

I don't care
how long it takes,

I will keep you here
all night.

We can't keep them
past 4:00.

I will keep you here
until 4:00.

Now, what we're gonna
try to do is fix the way
you young ladies

relate to each other.

Okay? Lady to lady.

So who has a lady problem
that they'd like
to talk about?

Yes?

Somebody wrote in that book

that I'm lying about
being a virgin

because I use
super-jumbo tampons.

But I can't help it
if I've got a heavy flow

and a wide-set vagina.

(SIGHS)
Yeah, I can't do this.

Ms. Norbury.

You're a successful,
intelligent,

caring, graceful woman.

I am?

There has to be something
you can say
to these young ladies.

Something to help them
with their self-esteem?

It's not
a self-esteem problem.

I think they're all pretty
pleased with themselves.

(SIGHS) Okay.

Okay, uh...

Everybody close your eyes.

I want you to raise your hand
if you have ever had a girl

say something bad about you
behind your back.

Open your eyes.

Now, close your eyes again.

And this time,

I want you to raise
your hand if you have ever

said anything about a friend
behind her back.

Open them.

(GIRLS GIGGLE)

There's been some
girl-on-girl crime here.

Okay. So, what
we could do today

is a couple exercises
to help you

express your anger
in a healthy way.

Let's start over here.

CADY: Ms. Norbury had us
confront each other directly

about the things
that were bothering us.

And it seemed like
every clique
had its own problems.

You've been acting
really stuck-up

ever since you switched
to shortfielder.

And Dawn agrees with me.

Dawn?

Don't drag me into this,

I'm pitching tomorrow.

(SPEAKS VIETNAMESE)

(SPEAKS VIETNAMESE)

Okay. Good.

Can I just say
that we don't have

a clique problem
at this school?

And some of us shouldn't have
to take this workshop,

because some of us
are just victims
in this situation.

That's probably true.
How many of you

have ever felt personally
victimized by Regina George?

Good.
Okay, who's next?

Who's next?

Um, Cady.

Do you have anything
you wanna own up to?

Yes.

No.

You never made up a rumor
about anybody?

Just that you sell drugs.

No.

Nothing you want
to apologize for?

I couldn't apologize
to Ms. Norbury

without getting blamed
for the whole Burn Book.

No.

I'm really disappointed
in you, Cady.

Okay, so we're all here
because of this book, right?

Well, I don't know
who wrote this book,

but you all have got to stop
calling each other

sluts and whores.

It just makes it okay for guys
to call you sluts and whores.

Who here has ever been
called a slut?

Okay, everybody up.

CADY: Ms. Norbury had us
write out apologies

to people that we'd hurt
in our lives.

"Alyssa, I'm sorry
I called you
a gap-toothed bitch.

"It's not your fault
you're so gap-toothed."

"Gretchen,

"I'm sorry I laughed at you
that time you got diarrhea

"at Barnes & Noble.

"And I'm sorry
I told everyone about it."

And I'm sorry
for repeating it now.

(ETHEREAL CHORAL THEME PLAYS)

Laura, I don't hate you
because you're fat.

You're fat because I hate you.

(GIRLS GRUNT)

I just wish we could
all get along

like we used to
in middle school.

I wish that I could
bake a cake made out of
rainbows and smiles,

and we'd all eat it
and be happy.

She doesn't even go here!

Do you even
go to this school?

No. I just have
a lot of feelings.

Okay, go home.

Sharon, I think you're doing
a great job.

Thanks. I feel like
I'm getting through.

I'm sorry that people
are so jealous of me.

But I can't help it
that I'm popular.

(CRASH)

Oh, my God! Oh, jeez.
Okay, walk it off.
Walk it off.

Okay.
That hurt.

They're okay.

They're okay.

MS. NORBURY: Oh, boy.
Okay, who's next?

Who's next? Keep it going.

Oh, my God.
It's her dream come true,

diving into
a big pile of girls.

(GIRLS SNICKER)

Okay, yeah,
I've got an apology.

So I have this friend
who is a new student
this year.

And I convinced her that
it would be fun

to mess up
Regina George's life.

So I had her pretend
to be friends with Regina,

and then she would come
to my house after

and we would just laugh
about all the dumb stuff
Regina said.

And we gave her
these candy bar things

that would
make her gain weight,

and we turned her best friends
against her.

And then... Oh, yeah, Cady...
You know my friend Cady.

She made out
with Regina's boyfriend

and then convinced him
to break up with her.

Oh, God,
and we gave you foot cream
instead of face wash.

God!
I am so sorry, Regina.

Really, I don't know
why I did it.

I guess it's probably because

I've got a big lesbian crush
on you.

Suck on that!

(ULULATES)

GIRLS: (CHANTING)
Janis! Janis! Janis! Janis!

CADY: Regina!

(DOOR SLAMS)

Regina, wait! I didn't mean
for that to happen.

To find out that everyone
hates me? I don't care.

Regina, please!
Regina, stop!

No! Do you know what
everyone says about you?

They say that you're
a home-schooled jungle freak,

who's a less-hot version
of me.

Yeah. So don't try to act
so innocent.

You can take that fake apology

and shove it right up
your hairy...

(SCREAMS)

(BRAKES SQUEAK)

CADY: And that's how
Regina George died.

No, I'm totally kidding.
But she did get hurt.

Some girls say
they saw her head
go all the way around.

But that's just a rumor.
Some people swear they saw me

push her in front of the bus.

That was an even worse rumor.

Everybody done?

No. Mom, I didn't do it.

I don't know what
to believe anymore.

Mom, believe me.
I'm your daughter.

Why are my tribal vases
under the sink?

Huh?

My tribal vases.

Why were they under the sink?

I don't know.

This is the fertility vase
of the Ndebele tribe.

Does that mean anything
to you?

No.

Who are you?

Great. All my friends hate me,
and now my mom hates me.

Your mom does not hate you.

She's afraid of you.

I don't know,

maybe we mainstream-schooled
you too soon.

Maybe you should come back

and be home-schooled
again for a while.

No. Only thing worse
than going back

will be not going back.

How bad's it gonna be
tomorrow?

Remember when
we saw those lions

fighting over
the wart hog carcass?

I'll be the wart hog.

You're not a wart hog,

you're a lion.

Just focus on your studies
for a little while.

You're still an excellent
student, right?

Oh, yeah. I need you
to sign my calculus test.

Why?

I'm failing.

Hmm. Okay. You are...

What do they call it?

Grounded.

You're grounded.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

(INDISTINCT WHISPERING)

(FARTS SOFTLY)

GIRL 1: She pushed her
in front of the bus.

GIRL 2:
Did you see her do it?

GIRL 1: Yes.

Did your teacher
ever try to sell you
marijuana or Ecstasy tablets?

BOY 1: No.

BOY 2: What are
marijuana tablets?

What's going on?
Where's Ms. Norbury?

Mr. Duvall,
this is ridiculous.

Ms. Norbury
does not sell drugs.

I know, Aaron.

But after the allegations
against Coach Carr

turned out
to be extremely true,

the school board felt
that it was best

that we investigate
every claim made

in this, uh, Burn Book.

That book was written
by a bunch of stupid girls

who make up rumors
because they're bored

with their own lame lives.

MR. DUVALL: Well,
unless someone wants
to come forward

and say, "I made it all up,"

this is how we have
to handle it.

To say that someone...

CADY: Oh, no. Bye, Aaron.
You're gonna hate me forever.

Mr. Duvall.

I wrote it.

Come on, Cady.

CADY: When you get
bit by a snake,

you're supposed to suck
the poison out.

That's what I had to do.

Suck all the poison
out of my life.

I started with Regina,

who was living proof

that the more
people are scared of you,

the more flowers you get.

Then there was Ms. Norbury,

who was living proof that
no good deed goes unpunished.

Oh, hi. Did you wanna
buy some drugs?

I'm just done
with my quiz.

Wait. I'll grade it
right now.

I gotta say,
watching the police
search my house

really was the cherry on top
of a fantastic year.

How much trouble
did you get in
for telling the truth?

A lot.

You didn't write
that whole book yourself.

Did you tell Mr. Duvall
who else did it?

No, because I'm trying
this new thing

where I don't
talk about people
behind their backs.

That's all right.

Getting hit by a bus
is pretty good punishment.

Ninety-four.

Welcome back, nerd.

Thanks.

Anyway...

I'm sorry.

I forgive you.

But as my own personal
form of punishment,

I figured out how you're gonna
earn that extra credit.

What's up?

( GOD IS A DJ PLAYING)

♪ I've been a girl
with her skirt pulled high

♪ Been the outcast
never running
with mascara eyes

♪ I see the world
as a candy store

♪ With a cigarette smile,
saying things you can't ignore

♪ Like Mommy, I love you

♪ Daddy, I hate you

♪ Brother, I need you

♪ Lover, hey, f... you

♪ I can see everything
here with my third eye

♪ Like the blue in the sky

♪ If God is a DJ
life is a dance floor

♪ Love is the rhythm
you are the music

♪ If God is a DJ
life is a dance floor

♪ You get what you're given

♪ It's all how you use it... ♪

Excellent.
Great turnout this year.

All right. It's all you.

Okay.

Make me look good at there.

Okay.

Marymount,
you sons of bitches.
You no-good sons of bitches.

You nervous?

Yes.

Don't be.
You can do this.

There's nothing
to break your focus,

because not one of those
Marymount boys is cute.

(APPLAUSE)

HOST: Good evening,
ladies and gentlemen.

Welcome to
the Illinois High School
Mathletes State Championship.

Let's start the competition.
Here is the first question.

Twice the larger
of two numbers

is three more than five times
the smaller,

and the sum
of four times the larger

and three times the smaller
is 71. What are...

(BUZZER)

North Shore?

Fourteen and five.

HOST: That is correct.
Question number two.

Find an odd three-digit number
whose digits add up to 12.

The digits are all different,

and the difference between
the first two digits

equals the difference
between...

(BUZZER)

Marymount?

741.

Correct.

CADY: Shoot.
I was really rusty.

Where's Cady?

She went out.

She's grounded.

Are they not allowed out
when they're grounded?

(RAP MUSIC PLAYING)

Don't forget to vote
for Spring Fling
King and Queen, people.

These A-holes
will represent you
for a full calendar year.

I'm gonna vote
for Regina George

because she got hit
by that bus.

I'm voting for Cady Heron
because she pushed her.

She's supposed
to be grounded,
but he let her out.

After 87 minutes
of very competitive play,
we have a tie.

In the event of a tie, we move
into a sudden-death round.

Each team is given
the opportunity

to choose their opponent.

North Shore,
who do you select?

The girl, dude.
The girl.

Contestant Krafft.

HOST: From Marymount,
Miss Caroline Krafft.

We pick the girl too.

And from North Shore,
Miss Caddy Heron.

It's Cady.

Oh, my God, that's me.

CADY: Miss Caroline Krafft
seriously needed
to pluck her eyebrows.

Her outfit looked like
it was picked out

by a blind Sunday school
teacher.

And she had some 99-cent
lip gloss on her snaggletooth.

And that's when I realized,
making fun of Caroline Krafft

wouldn't stop her from
beating me in this contest.

Contestants,
find the limit
of this equation.

CADY: Calling
somebody else fat
won't make you any skinnier.

Calling someone stupid
doesn't make you any smarter.

And ruining
Regina George's life

definitely didn't make me
any happier.

All you can do in life
is try to solve

the problem in front of you.

The limit is negative one.

CADY: Oh, crap. I lost.

That answer is incorrect.

Now, we are in a sudden death.
If Miss Heron can answer

this problem correctly,
we have a winner.

CADY: Limits.
Why couldn't I remember
anything about limits?

Limits. That was the week
Aaron got his hair cut.

Oh, God, he looked so cute.
Okay, focus, Cady.

What was on the board
behind Aaron's head?

If the limit never approaches
anything...

The limit does not exist.

The limit does not exist!

Our new state champions,

the North Shore Mathletes.

(CHEERING)

How do you like me now?

You like that? Yeah!
Get some! Get some!

BOY: Awesome. You went
with the leather sleeves.

Africa, you did
the damn thing.

Thanks.

Aw, thanks, K.G.

We're gonna look
so kick-ass in these

when we roll
into Spring Fling.

Oh, no, I'm not going.

What?

Cady, this is your night.
Don't let the haters

stop you from doing
your "thang."

Did you just say "thang"?

Cady, you don't
have to punish
yourself forever.

But I'm grounded.

You're already out.

(APPLAUSE)

All right, do we have
all of our nominees

for king and queen
on the stage?

Okay, good.

I just wanted to say
that you're all winners.

And I could not
be happier that
this school year's ending.

Here we go.

The winner
of the Spring Fling King,

Shane Oman.

Yes!

Whoo! That's what
I'm talking about!

(SHANE GROWLS)

(APPLAUSE)

MR. DUVALL:
And your Spring Fling Queen,

future co-chair
of the Student
Activities Board

and winner
of two gift certificates

to the Walker Brothers
Pancake House,

Cady Heron.

(SCATTERED APPLAUSE)

Where is Cady?

There she is.

Wow.

Thanks.

Um...

Well, half the people
in this room are mad at me.

And the other half
only like me

because they think I pushed
somebody in front of a bus.

So that's not good.

You know, it's not really
required of you

to make a speech.

I'm almost done,
I swear.

To, uh... all the people
whose feelings that got hurt

by the Burn Book,

I'm really sorry.

You know, I've never been
to one of these things before.

And when I think about
how many people wanted this

and how many people
cried over it and stuff...

I mean, I think everybody
looks like royalty tonight.

Look at Jessica Lopez.
That dress is amazing.

And Emma Gerber,

I mean, that hairdo
must have taken hours,

and you look really pretty.

So...

why is everybody stressing
over this thing?

I mean, it's just plastic.
Could really just...

(GASPS)

(CROWD GASPING)

Share it.

A piece for Gretchen Wieners,
a partial Spring Fling Queen.

(APPLAUSE)

A piece for Janis Ian.

(APPLAUSE)

Seriously, most people
just take the crown and go.

And a piece for Regina George.

She fractured her spine,

and she still looks
like a rock star.

(APPLAUSE)

Thank you.

And some for everybody else.

God, Mr. Duvall,
can you wrap it up?

Thanks.

All right, have a good time,
everyone.

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

♪ Oh, yeah
Oh, yeah

♪ Oh, yeah
Oh, yeah ♪

Look. I'm a queen.

As am I.

Hey.

Hey.

So are we still in a fight?

Are you still an asshole?

Mm, I don't think so.

Well, then I guess we're okay.

Oh, my God,
I love this song!

I hate this song.

I know this song!

( BUILT THIS WAY PLAYING)

Um, man candy,
stage right.

Hey, what's up?

Hey. Didn't think
you'd make it.

Oh, um... On behalf
of the senior class,

I would like to present you
with two gift certificates...

Thanks, sucker.

Yo, peace.

One gift certificate

to the Walker Brothers
Pancake House.

Thank you.

Congratulations
on winning State.

I was so nervous.
They made us do limits.

I thought I was gonna hurl.

How's your stomach now?

It's fine.

Do you feel nauseous at all?

No.

Have you been drinking?

No.

Okay.

Grool.

♪ I don't care

♪ And I wonder

♪ If I'm just built this way

♪ Every man that I know
makes me feel like

♪ I'm to blame

♪ When it's over

♪ Yeah, my selfish ways

♪ Go back to start again

No.

No.

♪ And I wonder if I'm just...

What's up?

Can I help you?

You Puerto Rican?

Lebanese.

I feel that.

♪ Go back to start again... ♪

CADY: In case
you're wondering,
The Plastics broke up.

Regina's spine healed,
and her physical therapist

taught her to channel
all her rage into sports.

(GRUNTS)

Oh!

CADY: It was perfect,

because the jock girls
weren't afraid of her.

Karen used
her special talents

to do the morning weather
announcements.

Hi. This is Karen Smith.
It's 68 degrees,

and there's
a 30 percent chance
that it's already raining.

CADY: And Gretchen
found herself a new clique

and a new queen bee to serve.

(SPEAKS VIETNAMESE)

(SPEAKS VIETNAMESE)

CADY: Aaron went
to Northwestern,

so I still get
to see him on weekends.

And me?

I had gone
from home-schooled
jungle freak

to shiny Plastic

to most hated person
in the world

to actual human being.

Hey.

All the drama from last year
just wasn't important anymore.

School used to be
like a shark tank,

but now I could just float.

Regina.

CADY: Finally, Girl World
was at peace.

Hey, check it out.
Junior Plastics.

CADY: And if any freshmen
tried to disturb that peace...

Well, let's just say we knew
how to take care of it.

Ooh.

Just kidding.

( DANCING WITH MYSELF PLAYING)

♪ On the floors of Tokyo

♪ Down in London town's
a go-go

♪ With the record selection
and the mirror's reflection

♪ I'm a-dancing with myself

♪ When there's no one else
in sight

♪ In the crowded, lonely night

♪ Well, I wait so long
for my love vibration

♪ And I'm dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Well, there's
nothing to lose
and there's nothing to prove

♪ And I'm dancing with myself,
oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ If I looked all over
the world, and there's
every type of girl

♪ But your empty eyes
seem to pass me by

♪ And leave me
dancing with myself

♪ So let's sink another drink

♪ 'Cause it'll give me
time to think

♪ If I had the chance,
I'd ask a one to dance

♪ And I'd be dancing
with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Well, there's
nothing to lose
and there's nothing to prove

♪ And I'm dancing with myself,
oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh... Oh!

♪ Well, if I looked
all over the world

♪ And there's every
type of girl

♪ But your empty eyes
seem to pass me by

♪ And leave me
dancing with myself

♪ So let's sink another drink

♪ 'Cause it'll give me
time to think

♪ If I had the chance,
I'd ask a one to dance

♪ And I'd be dancing
with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ If I had the chance,
I'd ask a one to dance

♪ If I had the chance,
I'd ask a one to dance

♪ If I had the chance,
I'd ask a one to dance

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Dancing with myself,
oh, world's all wet

♪ But I'll sweat

♪ And I'll sweat, sweat, sweat

♪ Sweat, sweat, sweat,
sweat, sweat, sweat

♪ Sweat, sweat, sweat,
sweat, sweat, sweat

♪ Sweat, sweat, ow!

♪ Dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
dancing with myself

♪ Oh, oh, oh, dancing... ♪