Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:04,505
Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
2
00:00:06,131 --> 00:00:08,467
Well, here are the proud parents-to-be.
3
00:00:08,634 --> 00:00:10,469
Yes, and we've been shopping.
4
00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:12,387
Yeah, look what we found.
Pretty neat, huh?
5
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:14,014
Ah, that's perfect. It'll do wonders
6
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:15,974
for his motor skills
and his mental acuity.
7
00:00:16,141 --> 00:00:18,894
And check this out.
We got one for the baby, too.
8
00:00:20,270 --> 00:00:23,941
Our next city councilman,
ladies and gentlemen.
9
00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:26,652
Boy, it's gonna be tough finding
a replacement for you, Woody.
10
00:00:26,818 --> 00:00:28,445
Why would you want to replace me, Sam?
11
00:00:28,612 --> 00:00:31,240
You can't tend bar here and be
a councilman at the same time.
12
00:00:31,406 --> 00:00:33,075
That's a full-time job.
13
00:00:33,242 --> 00:00:34,868
It is, Sam?
14
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:36,912
Yeah, and working here at Cheers
is a full-time job, too.
15
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,956
It is, Sam?
16
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,458
Yes.
17
00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,502
Well, can't I tend bar at least sometimes?
18
00:00:43,669 --> 00:00:46,588
What all does a city councilman
have to do anyway?
19
00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:48,298
Well, our present councilman
Kevin Fogerty
20
00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:50,968
rises at the crack of dawn--
6:30 to be exact.
21
00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:53,262
Then he showers, shaves,
goes downstairs
22
00:00:53,428 --> 00:00:55,681
for a leisurely breakfast
with his wife Estelle.
23
00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:58,350
Then he takes his son Joseph,
eight, and Hilary, eleven,
24
00:00:58,517 --> 00:01:00,519
to the Fenwick Elementary School.
25
00:01:00,686 --> 00:01:03,647
At least that was his routine
before the court order
26
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:06,733
deprived me of my right to know.
27
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:11,154
Big Brother, my friends. Big Brother.
28
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,909
Years from now, they're going to ask me
why I didn't see the signs.
29
00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:05,751
I guess I'd better call the newspaper
and put an ad in there
30
00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:07,502
looking for an assistant bartender.
31
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:09,379
All right, all right, Sammy,
32
00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:12,049
let me fill out an application.
33
00:02:12,674 --> 00:02:15,135
What about me?
I'd be a great bartender.
34
00:02:15,302 --> 00:02:17,929
Oh, come on, are you kidding me?
With those powerhouse drinks you make?
35
00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,389
Ah, come on.
36
00:02:19,556 --> 00:02:21,350
Sweetheart, the last time
I let you tend bar,
37
00:02:21,516 --> 00:02:23,143
there were 12 people
who made a naked conga line
38
00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:25,354
all the way out to the common,
39
00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:29,524
and Phil over there tried
to join The Flying Wallendas.
40
00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:30,942
I tell you,
41
00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:35,447
I sobered up real fast
on that high wire. Whoo!
42
00:02:37,741 --> 00:02:40,327
All right, so I made the drinks
a little strong that night.
43
00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:41,745
It's not gonna happen again.
44
00:02:41,912 --> 00:02:43,163
Come on, I could really use the money.
45
00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:44,748
You won't be sorry.
46
00:02:44,956 --> 00:02:46,708
Yeah, all right, go ahead.
I'll give you a shot.
47
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,960
- Yes!
- Now, hold it a second.
48
00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:51,171
I'm the one who's supposed to make
the decisions around here.
49
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,130
I am the manager.
50
00:02:52,297 --> 00:02:56,385
Now, to whom should I give
this job of bartender?
51
00:02:56,551 --> 00:02:57,552
How would you like me
52
00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:59,054
to rip out your still beating heart
53
00:02:59,221 --> 00:03:02,808
and show it to you
before you hit the ground?
54
00:03:02,974 --> 00:03:03,850
I've got it.
55
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:06,561
How about Carla?
56
00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,523
You know something, with Carla
being our new bartender,
57
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:10,816
we're going to need a waitress.
58
00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:12,401
Why don't you get on the phone
59
00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:13,568
and call the agency and hire one.
60
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:14,736
Think you can you manage that?
61
00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:16,530
Yes, I think I can manage that,
62
00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,990
but could you dial?
I just had my nails done.
63
00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:20,742
And could you talk?
64
00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:24,496
I feel uncomfortable
talking to strangers.
65
00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:26,915
Well, Carla, congratulations
on your new job.
66
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:29,251
Here's to Carla, our new bartender.
67
00:03:29,418 --> 00:03:30,585
Hear, hear.
68
00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:32,003
Carla, why don't you fire up a pitcher
69
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:33,630
of those lethal cocktails
that you make?
70
00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,173
Just don't tell Sammy, okay?
71
00:03:35,340 --> 00:03:36,842
I'm going to make you one pitcher
72
00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:38,927
of a little drink
my grandfather taught me.
73
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:43,098
It's called, I Know My Redeemer Liveth.
74
00:03:45,016 --> 00:03:46,101
Is it strong?
75
00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:49,396
Is it strong? One drink, you won't
recognize your best friend.
76
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:52,315
Make mine a double.
77
00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:02,784
Sam, this place is just a mess.
78
00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:03,994
Yeah, I know.
79
00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:06,413
Carla made one of her
specialty drinks last night.
80
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:07,748
Things got out of hand.
81
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,086
Morning, everybody.
82
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:14,254
Norm! Norm!
83
00:04:19,676 --> 00:04:20,969
How are you feeling, Norm?
84
00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:22,721
Terrible.
85
00:04:22,888 --> 00:04:24,848
I have a splitting headache,
86
00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:27,058
and I think I might be sick.
87
00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:28,894
Can I have a beer, Sammy?
88
00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:35,400
Hey there, Frasier.
89
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,861
I'm sorry, Sam.
90
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:39,654
Your friend Frasier is dead.
91
00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:44,701
What you are looking at
is his undead corpse.
92
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:48,955
Here you go, pal.
93
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:51,666
All right, let's review.
94
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:55,545
Last night, I got knee-walking drunk...
95
00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:59,591
And now I'm back in this bar
96
00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:02,803
a mere seven and a half hours later...
97
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:05,597
Hungover.
98
00:05:05,764 --> 00:05:08,934
Well, it's official.
I have a problem.
99
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:18,318
Cheers.
100
00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:20,529
Hey, is that you, Cliff ie?
101
00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:22,322
Cliff?
102
00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:26,701
He just woke up.
He doesn't know where he is.
103
00:05:29,246 --> 00:05:30,705
Cliff ie, calm down, man.
104
00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:33,500
Just look around and describe
what you see.
105
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:36,795
Cliff, you're in the office, pal.
106
00:05:38,505 --> 00:05:40,966
My pleasure.
107
00:05:57,899 --> 00:06:00,819
Coffee, please, there, Sammy.
108
00:06:00,986 --> 00:06:03,738
I told you watch out for her drinks.
How many did you have?
109
00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:05,490
Oh, I don't remember, Sam.
110
00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:06,908
I don't remember much of anything
111
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:09,077
after the wooden lady laughed at me
112
00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,997
and called me a half man.
113
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,541
Well, look at you guys.
114
00:06:14,708 --> 00:06:15,709
I wonder how Woody's doing.
115
00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:17,878
He was really knocking them back.
116
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,421
Nobody could drink that much
117
00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:20,881
and end up feeling human, Sam.
118
00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:24,342
Hey, everybody. Sorry I'm late.
I was doing my NordicTrack.
119
00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:29,222
Woody, you had as much of that
vile brew as the rest of us.
120
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:30,807
How can you be so chipper this morning?
121
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,768
Well, it's because of the old Hanover
hangover cure.
122
00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:37,063
Very simple. First, put on your pajamas,
123
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:40,901
then, take an aspirin
with a glass of cold water.
124
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:44,279
And then...
you vomit till your nose bleeds
125
00:06:44,446 --> 00:06:47,073
and heave until you see the angels.
126
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:50,535
Wake up in the morning,
you feel brand-new.
127
00:06:50,702 --> 00:06:52,245
Boy, I am hungry.
128
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,372
Anybody for some chili dogs?
129
00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:58,585
Okay, okay, but only two.
130
00:07:08,303 --> 00:07:10,555
Sammy, office. Quick.
131
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:14,851
What was that?
132
00:07:15,018 --> 00:07:18,188
That was either Carla
or the grim reaper.
133
00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:22,859
Dear Lord, let it be the reaper.
134
00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,655
Come on, talk to me, will you?
135
00:07:26,821 --> 00:07:27,906
I can't even say it.
136
00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:30,617
It's just the worst thing
that's ever happened to me in my life.
137
00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:32,285
You're scaring me, sweetheart.
138
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,578
Tell me what's going on.
139
00:07:33,745 --> 00:07:36,122
Okay. Last night,
140
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:39,042
you know, I had a few
of those drinks I made,
141
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:40,418
and I got loaded.
142
00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:42,295
I warned you about that, didn't I?
143
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:45,882
I know, I know. Anyways,
I kind of lost track of myself.
144
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:49,010
I think I went home with a guy.
145
00:07:49,219 --> 00:07:50,470
Yeah?
146
00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:52,222
It was a Cheers guy.
147
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:56,142
Oh, Sammy, Sammy, please, please,
148
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:57,978
tell me it was you.
149
00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,607
I'm sorry, sweetheart.
It wasn't me.
150
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:04,859
Oh, God. Oh, God.
151
00:08:05,026 --> 00:08:07,862
The options that leaves
are so horrifying!
152
00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:10,615
All right, all right.
153
00:08:10,782 --> 00:08:12,575
Wait a minute.
Now, what do you remember?
154
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:15,161
I don't remember much.
155
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:18,164
Just slow dancing to Nat King Cole
156
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:21,042
and doing it till the sheets burned.
157
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,086
What else?
158
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:25,213
Got to think. Got to think.
159
00:08:25,380 --> 00:08:27,048
Who was there?
160
00:08:27,215 --> 00:08:29,092
All right, let's see. There's Frasier...
161
00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,428
Frasier... I could live with that.
162
00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:33,596
Who else?
163
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:35,140
Norm.
164
00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:37,142
It couldn't have been him.
165
00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:40,145
Even drunk, I think I'd remember that.
166
00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:42,772
Woody?
167
00:08:42,939 --> 00:08:44,858
- No.
- No.
168
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,652
Well, I guess there's nobody else.
169
00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,863
- Well, what about Cli--
- There's nobody else, Sam.
170
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:53,324
Come on, sweetheart,
it's going to eat you up inside.
171
00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:56,161
Why don't you go talk
to each guy alone very subtly
172
00:08:56,327 --> 00:08:58,663
and just ask them what they remember
about last night?
173
00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:01,958
Chances are, whoever it was,
he'll be just as embarrassed
174
00:09:02,125 --> 00:09:03,960
by the whole situation as you are.
175
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,087
- You really think so?
- Yes, absolutely.
176
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:08,423
- That's worth a try.
- Yeah.
177
00:09:09,591 --> 00:09:10,800
Hey, Sammy,
178
00:09:11,092 --> 00:09:12,969
you don't think any less of me,
do you?
179
00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:15,972
Well, let's see who it is first.
180
00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:29,486
Hey, Fras.
181
00:09:31,112 --> 00:09:32,781
Pretty wild last night, huh?
182
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:36,576
If you can call Lilith rescuing me
183
00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:39,329
from accidental drowning
in my toilet, "pretty wild,"
184
00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:41,748
well, then, yes, life is a cabaret.
185
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:48,838
Hey, Norm.
186
00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:50,340
Yeah.
187
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:51,674
Do you believe all that stuff
188
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:53,009
that happened last night?
189
00:09:53,176 --> 00:09:54,511
I don't remember
190
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:57,013
a single thing
that happened last night.
191
00:09:57,180 --> 00:09:59,349
I do have a bad feeling, though.
192
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:03,645
Vera... made me breakfast in bed
this morning.
193
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:08,775
Kept calling me, "Mr. Two Times."
194
00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:15,740
Maybe it's best I don't remember.
195
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:23,039
Wood, remember anything
about what happened last night?
196
00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:25,333
Whatever it was, I missed it.
197
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:28,002
Spent most of last night
listening to Phil tell stories
198
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:30,421
about how he worked
on the Manhattan Project.
199
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:33,675
Try sleeping with that for 50 years.
200
00:10:40,932 --> 00:10:43,101
Well, that's everybody.
201
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,311
Yeah, what about--
202
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:47,230
That's everybody, Sam.
203
00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:49,315
Come on. Get out there.
You've got to ask him.
204
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,651
You'll go crazy if you don't know.
205
00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,953
Hey... Cliff...
206
00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:07,375
So, how was your evening last night?
207
00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:10,086
You ought to know, Carla.
208
00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:13,506
It was F-U-N, fun.
209
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:23,766
How was it F-U-N, fun, Cliff?
210
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:25,852
Carla, I spent most of the night
211
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:28,438
in the back seat of a cab
with yon Norm Peterson.
212
00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,106
Now, if that isn't a recipe for fun,
213
00:11:30,273 --> 00:11:31,816
I don't know what is.
214
00:11:31,983 --> 00:11:33,234
You bet.
215
00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:36,613
I don't get it. I just don't get it.
216
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:39,449
That's everybody, right? Jeez, I--
217
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,242
Unless...
218
00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:43,411
Unless I met someone.
219
00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:46,789
That's it! Mr. Right walked into the bar,
220
00:11:46,956 --> 00:11:48,374
swept me off my feet,
221
00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:51,461
and we made mad passionate love
all night long.
222
00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:53,087
Probably coming back for me tonight.
223
00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,256
Could be right.
I bet that's what it is.
224
00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:57,800
It's got to be, because everybody here
checks out, thank God.
225
00:11:57,967 --> 00:11:59,677
I know I didn't miss anyone.
226
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:06,684
Hey, sexy.
227
00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:16,903
Mona Lisa
228
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:19,530
Mona Lisa
Men have named you
229
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:22,700
Aah!
230
00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:45,556
Well, guys, guess who scaled
Mount Paulie last night.
231
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:49,352
Paul, Paul, can I talk to you
232
00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:50,812
in the office for a second, pal?
233
00:12:50,979 --> 00:12:52,814
Oh, sure, Sammy, I get it.
234
00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:55,191
Afraid of the new gunslinger
in town, huh?
235
00:12:55,358 --> 00:12:56,776
Yeah, that's right, Paul.
236
00:12:57,986 --> 00:12:59,362
What's the idea, Sammy?
237
00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:01,614
I got major dish for the guys.
238
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,157
Yeah, I know. Paul, listen, I...
239
00:13:03,324 --> 00:13:07,370
I heard about what happened
between you and Carla.
240
00:13:10,915 --> 00:13:12,834
She's already been
bragging about it, huh?
241
00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:15,670
No, not exactly, Paul.
242
00:13:15,837 --> 00:13:19,173
You know, it was wild, Sammy.
243
00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:21,050
All that screaming and scratching.
244
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,802
You should see the nail marks.
245
00:13:22,969 --> 00:13:25,096
They're all up and down her back.
246
00:13:26,264 --> 00:13:28,266
Oh, my. Yeah...
247
00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:31,269
Listen, I know what you want to do
248
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,187
is run out there and tell the guys,
249
00:13:33,354 --> 00:13:35,189
but I got to remind you here, Paul,
250
00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:36,691
a gentleman does not kiss and tell.
251
00:13:36,858 --> 00:13:38,026
It's just not cool.
252
00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:39,569
But you do it, Sam.
253
00:13:39,736 --> 00:13:42,655
True, true, but I'm Sam Malone.
254
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:46,159
By definition, everything I do is cool.
255
00:13:46,534 --> 00:13:48,411
You got a point there, but, Sammy,
the whole thing is--
256
00:13:48,578 --> 00:13:50,079
No, no, Paul, you don't understand.
257
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:51,497
Please, I got to ask you...
258
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:54,292
Keep this to yourself.
259
00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:57,295
Sam, you just don't get it.
260
00:13:57,462 --> 00:13:59,756
This kind of thing has never
happened to me before.
261
00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:02,300
Now, the one time it does happen,
262
00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:05,595
I can't even crow about it just a little?
263
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:08,681
I know how you feel.
All right, I tell you what,
264
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:10,391
why don't you crow in here with me
265
00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:12,226
and get it out of your system?
266
00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:14,979
Well, okay. It won't be
quite the same, but...
267
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:18,358
Yes!
268
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,735
High-five, Sammy.
The Paul-Monster!
269
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,071
Give me a "P"!
Give me an "A"!
270
00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:24,197
Give me a "U'!
Give me an "I"!
271
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:27,617
P-A-U-L!
Paul, Paul, Paul, Paul!
272
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:36,334
Through?
273
00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:38,669
Think so, yeah.
274
00:14:38,836 --> 00:14:41,923
Okay, we got a deal?
You're not gonna tell the guys?
275
00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:44,258
I won't tell them, but listen,
276
00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:46,636
I don't know how you're gonna
keep Carla from talking.
277
00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:51,682
Well, I'll have this little conversation
with her, too, okay?
278
00:14:52,058 --> 00:14:53,518
Okay, good.
279
00:14:53,684 --> 00:14:55,937
Hey, listen, while you're at it,
280
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:58,689
could you just tell her gently that...
281
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,150
...this was just a one-night thing?
282
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:03,486
Paulie don't need no clinging vines.
283
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:07,573
I'll let her down gently, Paul.
284
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:13,496
Hey, Paul, what was that
you were talking about
285
00:15:13,663 --> 00:15:15,081
getting lucky last night?
286
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:18,793
Oh, no, I guess I was making that up.
287
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:21,379
- Poor guy.
- Yeah.
288
00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:24,882
- Sometimes I feel sorry for old Paulie.
- Yeah.
289
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:28,553
Maybe we should've invited him
to come along with us last night.
290
00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:31,889
Boy, did we have ourselves
some fun or what?
291
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:35,309
What the hell did we do anyway?
292
00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:38,980
The best way to reconstruct
a night like that, Normie,
293
00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:41,524
is to go through our pockets.
294
00:15:43,151 --> 00:15:44,485
Yeah, here we go.
295
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:47,780
All right, here's a receipt
for the pizza place.
296
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,365
I sort of remember that.
297
00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:51,993
Twenty-four ninety-five
at a bowling alley,
298
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:55,204
Two hundred bucks
for the tattoo parlor,
299
00:15:55,371 --> 00:15:58,499
and twelve bucks for the cab
and the doughnut shop.
300
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:01,878
Say, Cliff...
301
00:16:04,005 --> 00:16:05,548
What was that one between
302
00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:08,301
the bowling alley and the taxi cab?
303
00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:12,930
Fred's Tattoo Parlor.
304
00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:19,812
Yeah, funny that should be in there.
305
00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,524
Yeah.
306
00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:02,730
I'll tell you what's on your butt
307
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:05,107
if you tell me what's on mine.
308
00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:12,949
Let's get it over with.
309
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:24,961
Those guys spend
way too much time together.
310
00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:50,403
Okay, Cliff...
311
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:51,988
Do you want to tell me
312
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:55,408
what's tattooed forever on my butt?
313
00:17:56,909 --> 00:18:01,622
It's a... big American flag there, Norm,
314
00:18:01,789 --> 00:18:03,291
with the motto,
315
00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,751
"God bless the US Post Office."
316
00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:18,180
What... What's on mine?
317
00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:21,183
A big heart with the words,
318
00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:23,519
"I love Vera."
319
00:18:35,197 --> 00:18:37,825
Guess they mixed them up, huh?
320
00:18:38,367 --> 00:18:40,786
I assume so.
321
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:44,874
Beautiful workmanship.
322
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:48,628
You want me to come over
and show Vera?
323
00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:56,636
Thanks, but no.
324
00:18:57,928 --> 00:19:00,222
In that case, would you mind
coming down to the post office
325
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:01,932
and showing my supervisor?
326
00:19:02,183 --> 00:19:05,102
No, no. I don't think so, Cliff.
327
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:08,272
Oh, come on, sweetheart,
328
00:19:08,439 --> 00:19:10,483
it's not that big a deal.
329
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:12,360
So you slept with Paul.
330
00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:17,281
You've gone to bed
with a lot of guys before.
331
00:19:17,448 --> 00:19:19,700
Not really, Sam.
332
00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:21,911
I mean, I talk a lot, you know,
333
00:19:22,078 --> 00:19:24,038
but when it comes right down to it,
334
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:27,333
I'm more talk than action.
335
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,585
But even when I did fool around,
336
00:19:29,752 --> 00:19:31,879
I always knew their names.
337
00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:34,423
I was always in control, you know?
338
00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:38,177
Last night was the first time
I ever lost control.
339
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,429
I stepped over the line.
340
00:19:40,596 --> 00:19:43,265
I'm now officially a slut.
341
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:47,144
Come on. Don't say that.
342
00:19:47,311 --> 00:19:49,980
As I told you, I talked with Paul.
343
00:19:50,147 --> 00:19:51,857
No one's ever going to know.
344
00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:54,568
Yeah, but I know, Sam.
345
00:19:54,735 --> 00:19:56,529
This is a secret
that I'm gonna have to live with
346
00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:58,114
for the rest of my life.
347
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:01,701
Well, come on, sweetheart.
348
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:04,161
We all have to live with secrets.
349
00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:06,747
Yeah, but not this bad.
350
00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:10,167
What if I told you
351
00:20:10,334 --> 00:20:12,712
that I had a secret
a lot worse than this?
352
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:14,338
Oh, Sammy, how could you have
353
00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:16,674
a problem worse? You're perfect.
354
00:20:16,841 --> 00:20:19,218
You don't even know
what the rest of the world is like.
355
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:23,097
Honey, I'm not perfect.
356
00:20:23,264 --> 00:20:25,015
Oh, yeah, right.
357
00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:28,728
All right. You really want to know?
358
00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,730
Watch this.
359
00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:32,815
Oh!
360
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:47,872
Holy mother of God.
Sammy, you wear a rug.
361
00:20:48,038 --> 00:20:50,958
It's not a rug. It's not a rug.
362
00:20:51,125 --> 00:20:53,419
It's a hair replacement system.
363
00:20:55,045 --> 00:20:59,842
Oh, Sammy,
Look at you! You're bald!
364
00:21:00,009 --> 00:21:01,969
All this time,
the great Sam Malone's hair
365
00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:04,346
is nothing but a fraud!
366
00:21:04,513 --> 00:21:07,475
Hey, at least I didn't sleep with Paul!
367
00:21:11,145 --> 00:21:13,939
Paul, schmaul. That's nothing.
368
00:21:14,106 --> 00:21:16,609
Nothing? It was a pretty big deal
a minute ago.
369
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:19,069
Yeah, well, that was before
I found out you wear a piece.
370
00:21:19,236 --> 00:21:22,656
Hair replacement system.
Hair replacement system.
371
00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:24,742
You know, if you're not going
to use the proper terminology,
372
00:21:24,909 --> 00:21:27,536
I think I'd just like to be
by myself right now.
373
00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:30,206
Sammy, I'm sorry.
374
00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:32,208
It's just, you caught me by surprise.
375
00:21:32,374 --> 00:21:34,585
Yeah, well, imagine how it caught me
376
00:21:34,752 --> 00:21:37,713
when on the morning
of August 12th, 1989,
377
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:40,591
I looked in the sink and...
378
00:21:40,758 --> 00:21:43,135
I'm sorry. I thought
I could talk about this.
379
00:21:47,014 --> 00:21:48,349
Sam.
380
00:21:49,934 --> 00:21:53,354
Sam, Sam, Sammy, it's okay.
381
00:21:53,938 --> 00:21:55,648
So you're blowing your feathers.
382
00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,150
It's not the end of the world.
383
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:01,403
Sure. You know, there's a lot more
to Sam Malone
384
00:22:01,612 --> 00:22:03,447
than just your great hair.
385
00:22:03,614 --> 00:22:05,991
- Really?
- Of course.
386
00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:07,618
You're a great guy.
387
00:22:07,785 --> 00:22:09,203
You're handsome and sweet.
388
00:22:09,370 --> 00:22:11,121
Oh, don't say sweet.
389
00:22:11,288 --> 00:22:12,790
What's the matter with sweet?
390
00:22:12,957 --> 00:22:16,001
It's another way of saying bald.
391
00:22:16,502 --> 00:22:18,546
Sammy. Sam, I mean it.
392
00:22:18,712 --> 00:22:21,131
You are a terrific, sweet guy.
393
00:22:21,298 --> 00:22:23,592
Anybody who would do
what you just did
394
00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:25,302
to make someone feel better
395
00:22:25,469 --> 00:22:28,472
is just the best friend in the world.
396
00:22:29,557 --> 00:22:32,101
You don't think any less of me?
397
00:22:32,268 --> 00:22:34,186
Think any less of me?
398
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:36,188
No.
27017
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
