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1
00:00:02,653 --> 00:00:04,329
Sheldon, your food's
getting cold.
2
00:00:04,331 --> 00:00:05,747
I'll eat later.
3
00:00:05,749 --> 00:00:06,949
Right now, I'm suckling
4
00:00:06,951 --> 00:00:09,284
at the informative bosom
of mother physics.
5
00:00:10,320 --> 00:00:13,154
It's hot when
Sheldon talks dirty.
6
00:00:14,991 --> 00:00:18,427
So, I found this Web site
where you send them pictures,
7
00:00:18,429 --> 00:00:19,594
they sculpt your head
8
00:00:19,596 --> 00:00:21,596
and make an action figure
out of you.
9
00:00:21,598 --> 00:00:22,597
How awesome is that?
10
00:00:22,599 --> 00:00:23,715
Oh, let me see.
11
00:00:23,717 --> 00:00:24,800
Yeah, you can pick
your wardrobe.
12
00:00:24,802 --> 00:00:26,468
You can even choose
your accessories.
13
00:00:27,638 --> 00:00:31,473
Leonard, you can get
a little asthma inhaler.
14
00:00:32,442 --> 00:00:33,775
Oh, this is neat.
15
00:00:33,777 --> 00:00:35,310
Think about all
the action figures
16
00:00:35,312 --> 00:00:36,511
we've bought over the years.
17
00:00:36,513 --> 00:00:39,281
It would be kind of cool
to have ones that look like us.
18
00:00:39,283 --> 00:00:40,515
Don't you think?
19
00:00:43,369 --> 00:00:45,237
Yeah, if that's your idea
of what's cool,
20
00:00:45,239 --> 00:00:47,188
you should get one.
21
00:00:47,190 --> 00:00:49,541
Yeah, so, I'm out.
22
00:00:50,860 --> 00:00:52,244
What do you think,
Sheldon?
23
00:00:52,246 --> 00:00:54,162
Want an action figure
that looks just like you?
24
00:00:54,164 --> 00:00:56,064
Would it come with kung-fu grip?
25
00:00:56,066 --> 00:00:57,432
No.
26
00:00:57,434 --> 00:00:59,584
Don't waste my time.
27
00:01:00,803 --> 00:01:03,672
You get that these are
personalize action figures.
28
00:01:03,674 --> 00:01:06,008
Honey, if you want one,
just get one.
29
00:01:06,010 --> 00:01:07,309
You're still
out, right?
30
00:01:07,311 --> 00:01:09,394
Yep.
31
00:01:09,396 --> 00:01:12,931
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
32
00:01:12,933 --> 00:01:16,818
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
33
00:01:16,820 --> 00:01:18,353
♪ The Earth began to cool
34
00:01:18,355 --> 00:01:20,906
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
35
00:01:20,908 --> 00:01:23,141
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
36
00:01:23,143 --> 00:01:25,861
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
37
00:01:25,863 --> 00:01:27,913
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
38
00:01:27,915 --> 00:01:29,564
♪ Bang! ♪
39
00:01:29,565 --> 00:01:32,565
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x14 ♪
The Cooper/Kripke Inversion
Original Air Date on January 31, 2013
40
00:01:32,566 --> 00:01:34,566
== sync, corrected by Trankill ==
41
00:01:34,997 --> 00:01:37,282
A hush falls over the crowd
42
00:01:37,284 --> 00:01:40,902
as Cooper studies the board.
43
00:01:40,904 --> 00:01:43,071
He makes his move.
44
00:01:43,073 --> 00:01:44,506
He's dividing both sides by "I."
45
00:01:44,508 --> 00:01:46,424
He's adding back
the coefficient.
46
00:01:46,426 --> 00:01:47,759
He has a value for "P."
47
00:01:47,761 --> 00:01:49,077
He's plugging that back in.
48
00:01:49,079 --> 00:01:50,045
He takes the derivative,
49
00:01:50,047 --> 00:01:51,179
and he solves the equation.
50
00:01:51,181 --> 00:01:52,297
The crowd goes wild.
51
00:01:52,299 --> 00:01:53,398
Nobel! Nobel!
52
00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:55,934
Cooper?
53
00:01:55,936 --> 00:01:57,018
Nobel.
54
00:01:57,020 --> 00:01:58,186
Kripke.
55
00:01:59,488 --> 00:02:01,806
Don't look at my board.
56
00:02:03,109 --> 00:02:05,026
What's that?
57
00:02:05,028 --> 00:02:07,479
That's a drawing
of a really cool train.
58
00:02:07,481 --> 00:02:08,847
Don't look at that, either.
59
00:02:08,849 --> 00:02:10,098
What do you want?
60
00:02:10,100 --> 00:02:11,733
I have some
bad news.
61
00:02:11,735 --> 00:02:13,118
You're working
on a grant proposal
62
00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:14,569
for a new
fusion reactor.
63
00:02:14,571 --> 00:02:17,539
I'm working on a grant proposal
for a new fusion reactor.
64
00:02:17,541 --> 00:02:21,126
The university is only allowed
to submit one proposal.
65
00:02:21,128 --> 00:02:23,895
So they asked you to pack up
your things and ship out.
66
00:02:23,897 --> 00:02:25,297
That's hard cheese, Barry.
67
00:02:25,299 --> 00:02:26,898
You're one of the good ones.
68
00:02:27,783 --> 00:02:31,836
No, they're making us
work together.
69
00:02:31,838 --> 00:02:34,389
That's ridiculous.
70
00:02:34,391 --> 00:02:36,675
I am one of the great minds
of our generation.
71
00:02:36,677 --> 00:02:38,843
I work on a level so rarified
72
00:02:38,845 --> 00:02:40,312
you couldn't
even imagine it.
73
00:02:40,314 --> 00:02:43,565
I said stop looking
at my cool train!
74
00:02:45,735 --> 00:02:46,735
Hmm.
75
00:02:46,737 --> 00:02:47,802
Kind of a strange place
76
00:02:47,804 --> 00:02:49,487
to put a picture of you
and Bernadette.
77
00:02:49,489 --> 00:02:54,526
Well, I wanted everybody
to know I love my wife.
78
00:02:54,528 --> 00:02:57,812
And nobody to know I forgot
to turn off the laser.
79
00:03:02,134 --> 00:03:03,234
They're here.
80
00:03:03,236 --> 00:03:04,953
Our action figures
have arrived.
81
00:03:04,955 --> 00:03:07,488
This is the best $500
I've ever spent.
82
00:03:07,490 --> 00:03:09,374
$1,000 on action figures?
83
00:03:09,376 --> 00:03:11,209
How can you afford that?
84
00:03:11,211 --> 00:03:12,660
Easy-- his family's loaded,
85
00:03:12,662 --> 00:03:14,662
and Bernadette has a great job.
86
00:03:14,664 --> 00:03:17,498
My wife came with both
fun bags and money bags.
87
00:03:18,718 --> 00:03:23,138
Say hello to an exact
scale model of me.
88
00:03:28,311 --> 00:03:31,730
Oh, I'm not dark chocolate.
89
00:03:31,732 --> 00:03:34,616
I'm melt-in-your-mouth caramel.
90
00:03:35,484 --> 00:03:38,403
Oh, man.
91
00:03:41,874 --> 00:03:44,859
Look at my nose.
92
00:03:44,861 --> 00:03:46,661
Maybe it's a shipping problem.
93
00:03:46,663 --> 00:03:48,296
What?
Yeah.
94
00:03:48,298 --> 00:03:49,748
Maybe Wesley Snipes
and Toucan Sam
95
00:03:49,750 --> 00:03:52,033
just got action figures
that look like you guys.
96
00:03:54,470 --> 00:03:55,703
This sucks.
97
00:03:55,705 --> 00:03:57,389
I can't believe
I wasted all that money.
98
00:03:57,391 --> 00:04:00,558
Aw, and my girlfriend
wouldn't let me get one.
99
00:04:01,845 --> 00:04:03,862
Look at my face.
100
00:04:03,864 --> 00:04:06,214
Do I look smug?
I feel smug.
101
00:04:09,001 --> 00:04:11,987
I hate it when you make me
sit through all the credits.
102
00:04:11,989 --> 00:04:14,105
Well, sometimes there's
a secret ending,
103
00:04:14,107 --> 00:04:15,824
like in The Avengers.
104
00:04:15,826 --> 00:04:17,742
Yeah, but I don't think
that's going to happen
105
00:04:17,744 --> 00:04:20,412
in a documentary
about the Holocaust.
106
00:04:21,664 --> 00:04:23,615
They could
show bloopers.
107
00:04:26,453 --> 00:04:27,568
Oh, no.
108
00:04:27,570 --> 00:04:28,670
What is that?
109
00:04:28,672 --> 00:04:30,171
That is Sheldon's
110
00:04:30,173 --> 00:04:34,125
"I'm unhappy and about
to destroy the planet" music.
111
00:04:34,127 --> 00:04:36,261
Come on, let's just go
to your place.
112
00:04:36,263 --> 00:04:38,413
Well, wait, if he's unhappy,
shouldn't we talk to him?
113
00:04:38,415 --> 00:04:39,464
"Shouldn't we talk to him?"
114
00:04:39,466 --> 00:04:42,017
Have you learned nothing
in six years?
115
00:04:48,324 --> 00:04:50,191
You doing okay, sweetie?
116
00:04:53,179 --> 00:04:55,113
There is ominous music playing,
117
00:04:55,115 --> 00:04:57,315
and there is an afghan
over my head.
118
00:04:57,317 --> 00:04:58,717
I don't know where you're from,
119
00:04:58,719 --> 00:05:00,952
but where I'm from,
that means I'm not doing okay.
120
00:05:01,821 --> 00:05:03,955
Want me to make
you some tea?
121
00:05:03,957 --> 00:05:06,224
Tea is for when I'm upset.
I'm not upset.
122
00:05:06,226 --> 00:05:09,110
The university's forcing me
to work with Kripke.
123
00:05:09,112 --> 00:05:10,611
I'm outraged.
124
00:05:10,613 --> 00:05:13,214
So, cocoa?
125
00:05:13,216 --> 00:05:14,782
Yes, cocoa.
126
00:05:16,752 --> 00:05:19,454
Do you have any idea what
it's like to be paired
127
00:05:19,456 --> 00:05:21,756
with someone who's so
incredibly annoying?
128
00:05:21,758 --> 00:05:24,008
Oh, teacher! Me! Me!
129
00:05:26,829 --> 00:05:28,296
See, I did all this great work,
130
00:05:28,298 --> 00:05:30,565
and now he's just going to
come along and ruin it.
131
00:05:30,567 --> 00:05:32,734
I am angrier than ever
and filled with despair.
132
00:05:32,736 --> 00:05:35,153
What beverage
do you make for that?
133
00:05:35,155 --> 00:05:37,939
Oh... no, no, no, I know this.
134
00:05:37,941 --> 00:05:39,124
Uh...
135
00:05:39,126 --> 00:05:40,575
hot apple cider
with cinnamon sticks?
136
00:05:40,577 --> 00:05:42,994
Yes, hot apple cider
with cinnamon sticks!
137
00:05:47,883 --> 00:05:49,984
What the frig, Cooper?
138
00:05:49,986 --> 00:05:50,952
We were
supposed to meet
139
00:05:50,954 --> 00:05:53,321
in my office
a half an hour ago.
140
00:05:53,323 --> 00:05:55,673
And yet,
now you're in my office.
141
00:05:55,675 --> 00:05:58,159
Point: Cooper.
142
00:05:58,161 --> 00:06:00,512
Welcome to the Thunderdome,
Kripke.
143
00:06:00,514 --> 00:06:03,681
We agreed to exchange
copies of our work.
144
00:06:03,683 --> 00:06:04,766
Let me see yours.
145
00:06:04,768 --> 00:06:07,936
Why don't you show me
yours first.
146
00:06:07,938 --> 00:06:10,972
You think I just fell
off the turnip truck?
147
00:06:12,191 --> 00:06:13,858
We exchange at the same time.
148
00:06:13,860 --> 00:06:16,628
How do I know you're not
going to take my ideas
149
00:06:16,630 --> 00:06:18,163
and publish them
as your own?
150
00:06:18,165 --> 00:06:20,064
How do I know you're not
going to do that with mine?
151
00:06:20,066 --> 00:06:21,182
Yeah, because I'm not interested
152
00:06:21,184 --> 00:06:22,867
in getting published
in Mad magazine.
153
00:06:25,070 --> 00:06:27,956
Zingers fly fast
in the Thunderdome, Barry.
154
00:06:27,958 --> 00:06:30,792
Are we going
to do this or not?
155
00:06:30,794 --> 00:06:32,327
Thank you.
156
00:06:32,329 --> 00:06:34,212
So, we read each other's work,
meet again tomorrow?
157
00:06:34,214 --> 00:06:36,364
Fine.
158
00:06:39,585 --> 00:06:42,220
Nice try.
This is blank paper.
159
00:06:42,222 --> 00:06:44,222
And I am sure it's
still more valuable
160
00:06:44,224 --> 00:06:45,706
than whatever's in here.
161
00:06:45,708 --> 00:06:48,593
Cough it up, Cooper.
162
00:06:48,595 --> 00:06:50,145
Very well.
163
00:06:55,184 --> 00:06:58,987
If this one's blank, too,
I'm going to be furious.
164
00:07:00,789 --> 00:07:02,323
Fine.
165
00:07:11,367 --> 00:07:12,734
You!
166
00:07:12,736 --> 00:07:15,003
Always bet on black.
167
00:07:15,005 --> 00:07:18,173
Get that waste of money
out of my face.
168
00:07:18,175 --> 00:07:19,924
It's only a
waste of money
169
00:07:19,926 --> 00:07:22,210
if we don't
play with them.
170
00:07:22,212 --> 00:07:23,744
He's right, dawg.
171
00:07:25,598 --> 00:07:27,048
Please, I'm working.
172
00:07:27,050 --> 00:07:30,385
You know, there is a way
we can get action figures
173
00:07:30,387 --> 00:07:31,936
to look exactly
like us.
174
00:07:31,938 --> 00:07:33,104
Oh, yeah?
How's that?
175
00:07:33,106 --> 00:07:34,189
Two words:
176
00:07:34,191 --> 00:07:36,357
3-D printer.
177
00:07:36,359 --> 00:07:37,942
Wait, maybe it's three words.
178
00:07:37,944 --> 00:07:39,394
No, hang on.
179
00:07:39,396 --> 00:07:42,697
Okay, one word, a letter
and a number and...
180
00:07:42,699 --> 00:07:44,232
maybe a hyphen.
181
00:07:44,234 --> 00:07:46,401
3-D printer.
182
00:07:46,403 --> 00:07:49,737
I have always wanted
a 3-D printer.
183
00:07:49,739 --> 00:07:51,122
Of course you have.
184
00:07:51,124 --> 00:07:52,240
They're an
engineer's dream.
185
00:07:52,242 --> 00:07:53,374
Anything you can design,
186
00:07:53,376 --> 00:07:55,610
a 3-D printer can make
out of plastic.
187
00:07:55,612 --> 00:07:57,912
Yeah, but they're so expensive.
188
00:07:57,914 --> 00:07:58,963
Oh, come on.
189
00:07:58,965 --> 00:08:00,048
You deserve one.
190
00:08:00,050 --> 00:08:01,499
You've worked hard
to find a woman
191
00:08:01,501 --> 00:08:03,051
who makes a lot of money.
192
00:08:05,087 --> 00:08:07,455
Well, the prices
have been coming down.
193
00:08:07,457 --> 00:08:08,623
Oh, true.
194
00:08:08,625 --> 00:08:10,758
They're practically
giving them away.
195
00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:13,745
You know, in exchange for money.
196
00:08:13,747 --> 00:08:16,797
And we can make stuff
we need for work with it.
197
00:08:16,799 --> 00:08:19,434
Prototypes
of my CAD/CAM designs,
198
00:08:19,436 --> 00:08:20,518
specialized tools...
199
00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:22,320
Not to mention
Malibu Koothrappali
200
00:08:22,322 --> 00:08:25,607
and his totally bitchin'
dream house.
201
00:08:25,609 --> 00:08:28,809
We don't need Malibu
Koothrappali's dream house.
202
00:08:28,811 --> 00:08:30,194
Really, smart guy?
203
00:08:30,196 --> 00:08:32,747
Where's he supposed to park
his sweet little Corvette?
204
00:08:35,034 --> 00:08:39,487
The monkey in my tobacco study
has taken to smoking a pipe.
205
00:08:39,489 --> 00:08:42,823
I'm supposed to remove
his brain to examine,
206
00:08:42,825 --> 00:08:45,677
but it's hard because now he
reminds me of my uncle.
207
00:08:48,297 --> 00:08:50,014
You've been
awfully quiet tonight.
208
00:08:50,016 --> 00:08:51,332
Is everything okay?
209
00:08:51,334 --> 00:08:53,601
I'm fine.
210
00:08:53,603 --> 00:08:56,387
All right, well,
how was work today?
211
00:08:56,389 --> 00:08:58,640
Did you exchange your research
with Kripke?
212
00:09:00,476 --> 00:09:02,360
Yes.
213
00:09:02,362 --> 00:09:04,845
Sheldon, what's going on?
214
00:09:06,231 --> 00:09:10,184
I read his research, and...
215
00:09:10,186 --> 00:09:13,521
it's leaps and bounds
ahead of mine.
216
00:09:13,523 --> 00:09:16,541
Which means the mommy
of the smartest physicist
217
00:09:16,543 --> 00:09:21,629
at the university is not
my mommy as I had thought.
218
00:09:21,631 --> 00:09:23,548
It's his mommy.
219
00:09:24,967 --> 00:09:27,135
Sheldon, I wish there was
something I could do
220
00:09:27,137 --> 00:09:28,636
to make you feel better.
221
00:09:30,255 --> 00:09:32,006
May I offer you a consoling hug?
222
00:09:33,208 --> 00:09:34,726
What do we have to lose?
223
00:09:41,433 --> 00:09:44,268
How's that?
224
00:09:44,270 --> 00:09:47,221
I feel like I'm being strangled
by a boa constrictor.
225
00:09:50,192 --> 00:09:53,027
Why'd you stop?
226
00:09:56,961 --> 00:10:00,296
Come on, Sheldon!
We're going to be late!
227
00:10:00,298 --> 00:10:03,182
I can't go in today.
I'm sick.
228
00:10:03,184 --> 00:10:04,284
You're not sick.
229
00:10:04,286 --> 00:10:05,501
You just don't want
to face Kripke.
230
00:10:05,503 --> 00:10:07,987
No, look.
231
00:10:09,690 --> 00:10:13,526
128.
232
00:10:15,195 --> 00:10:17,013
See?
233
00:10:17,015 --> 00:10:19,315
What did you do,
put this in your tea?
234
00:10:19,317 --> 00:10:21,200
Oh, dear.
235
00:10:21,202 --> 00:10:24,287
Now I'm not even smarter
than you.
236
00:10:24,289 --> 00:10:26,789
Sheldon, Kripke's not
smarter than you.
237
00:10:26,791 --> 00:10:28,541
You just got stuck
on a wrong path.
238
00:10:28,543 --> 00:10:29,776
Happened to Einstein.
239
00:10:29,778 --> 00:10:32,412
He got stuck on the unified
field theory for decades.
240
00:10:32,414 --> 00:10:34,363
Oh, don't play
the Einstein card.
241
00:10:34,365 --> 00:10:36,633
His great breakthroughs happened
when no one knew anything.
242
00:10:36,635 --> 00:10:39,135
So everything
was a great breakthrough.
243
00:10:39,137 --> 00:10:40,420
Sheldon Lee Cooper,
244
00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:42,138
I do not have time
for this nonsense.
245
00:10:42,140 --> 00:10:44,257
Now, go put your clothes on,
get in the car,
246
00:10:44,259 --> 00:10:45,842
and lets go to work.
247
00:10:46,710 --> 00:10:49,596
All right, geez.
248
00:10:49,598 --> 00:10:51,147
What a grouch.
249
00:10:54,051 --> 00:10:55,435
How did I do that?
250
00:10:55,437 --> 00:10:58,187
I got to remember
how I did that.
251
00:10:59,273 --> 00:11:01,658
Do you realize, by
owning a 3-D printer,
252
00:11:01,660 --> 00:11:04,577
we are reclaiming
the manufacturing process
253
00:11:04,579 --> 00:11:08,498
and taking jobs back
from sweatshops in China?
254
00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:11,901
I think this thing
was made in China.
255
00:11:12,736 --> 00:11:14,754
Eh, what can you do?
256
00:11:14,756 --> 00:11:17,423
Ooh, I-I think it's done.
257
00:11:20,078 --> 00:11:21,260
It worked!
258
00:11:21,262 --> 00:11:24,263
We printed a whistle.
259
00:11:25,132 --> 00:11:26,716
Amazing.
260
00:11:26,718 --> 00:11:28,751
You realize these things
go for 25 cents a pop
261
00:11:28,753 --> 00:11:29,919
at a party store.
262
00:11:29,921 --> 00:11:32,221
And we made it
in only three hours.
263
00:11:34,643 --> 00:11:36,893
Sounds just like
store-bought.
264
00:11:37,895 --> 00:11:41,764
Okay, give me
a superhero pose,
265
00:11:41,766 --> 00:11:43,032
and I will scan you
266
00:11:43,034 --> 00:11:44,734
into the computer
for your action figure.
267
00:11:45,820 --> 00:11:47,570
Oh, I wish I was
in better shape.
268
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:51,324
Stop holding
your stomach in.
269
00:11:51,326 --> 00:11:54,276
I'll give you a six-pack
with the computer.
270
00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:55,662
Oh, okay, great.
271
00:11:55,664 --> 00:11:57,997
Now I can look
like Val Kilmer as Batman
272
00:11:57,999 --> 00:12:00,783
instead of Val Kilmer
as he looks today.
273
00:12:03,421 --> 00:12:05,972
All right, you can
suck it in a little bit.
274
00:12:09,309 --> 00:12:11,227
Cooper, we have a problem.
275
00:12:11,229 --> 00:12:12,979
Your work is really not
276
00:12:12,981 --> 00:12:15,014
at a level
I expected it to be.
277
00:12:15,016 --> 00:12:16,849
I know.
278
00:12:16,851 --> 00:12:18,434
Go ahead, mock me.
279
00:12:18,436 --> 00:12:21,404
Just use small words
so I understand.
280
00:12:22,272 --> 00:12:23,656
Don't play dumb
with me.
281
00:12:23,658 --> 00:12:25,575
We both know
what your problem is.
282
00:12:25,577 --> 00:12:27,176
We do?
283
00:12:27,178 --> 00:12:28,828
You have a girlfriend.
284
00:12:28,830 --> 00:12:30,479
So?
285
00:12:30,481 --> 00:12:32,415
So my work would suffer, too,
286
00:12:32,417 --> 00:12:35,752
if I was getting laid
all the time.
287
00:12:40,024 --> 00:12:41,758
Yes.
288
00:12:43,243 --> 00:12:45,445
That is the reason.
289
00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:50,016
My work is suffering
because of...
290
00:12:50,018 --> 00:12:52,435
all the laid I'm getting.
291
00:12:54,438 --> 00:12:56,522
You lucky bastard.
292
00:12:56,524 --> 00:12:59,058
What can I say, you know?
293
00:12:59,060 --> 00:13:01,677
She enjoys my genitals.
294
00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:06,199
I am giving them to her
on a nightly basis.
295
00:13:07,151 --> 00:13:09,569
Okay, stop bragging.
296
00:13:09,571 --> 00:13:11,738
You had some brilliant
insights in here,
297
00:13:11,740 --> 00:13:12,955
but if we're gonna
make this work,
298
00:13:12,957 --> 00:13:14,824
you need to buckle down
and focus.
299
00:13:14,826 --> 00:13:16,375
I'll do what I can.
300
00:13:16,377 --> 00:13:19,746
But it's not going to be easy,
because when I'm with Amy
301
00:13:19,748 --> 00:13:23,649
and our bathing suit areas
mush together...
302
00:13:23,651 --> 00:13:26,135
boy howdy, is it magic
303
00:13:33,327 --> 00:13:36,395
Oh, good,
you're home.
304
00:13:36,397 --> 00:13:38,631
Got a little
surprise for you.
305
00:13:38,633 --> 00:13:39,816
What?
306
00:13:39,818 --> 00:13:40,900
Say hello
307
00:13:40,902 --> 00:13:43,069
to my little friend.
308
00:13:45,572 --> 00:13:48,891
Oh, my God.
309
00:13:48,893 --> 00:13:50,243
That's so cute.
310
00:13:50,245 --> 00:13:53,062
I didn't think there could be
a smaller version of you.
311
00:13:55,565 --> 00:13:57,250
I know, right?
312
00:13:57,252 --> 00:13:59,068
And, thanks
to photographs
313
00:13:59,070 --> 00:14:00,670
and a little
3-D modeling,
314
00:14:00,672 --> 00:14:03,372
here comes the bride.
315
00:14:04,174 --> 00:14:06,459
Oh, Howie,
I love these.
316
00:14:06,461 --> 00:14:07,460
I thought you might.
317
00:14:07,462 --> 00:14:09,178
Were they expensive?
318
00:14:09,180 --> 00:14:10,713
Didn't cost a thing.
I made them myself.
319
00:14:10,715 --> 00:14:12,265
How?
Koothrappali and I
320
00:14:12,267 --> 00:14:15,885
bought a used 3-D printer
for $5,000.
321
00:14:16,971 --> 00:14:19,421
$5,000 for a
couple of dolls?
322
00:14:19,423 --> 00:14:21,590
Are you out
of your mind?
323
00:14:22,425 --> 00:14:25,094
Not just
a couple of dolls.
324
00:14:25,096 --> 00:14:27,730
For as many dolls
as we want.
325
00:14:29,233 --> 00:14:31,734
And whistles.
326
00:14:31,736 --> 00:14:34,737
At any point, did it dawn
on you to talk to me
327
00:14:34,739 --> 00:14:36,539
about spending this
kind of money?
328
00:14:37,441 --> 00:14:39,609
It's kind of
dawning on me now.
329
00:14:40,460 --> 00:14:42,628
I don't believe you!
330
00:14:42,630 --> 00:14:45,631
Howie, we can't afford to waste
money on junk like this.
331
00:14:45,633 --> 00:14:47,583
What are you talking about?
332
00:14:47,585 --> 00:14:49,252
We make plenty
of money.
333
00:14:49,254 --> 00:14:50,553
I make plenty of money!
334
00:14:50,555 --> 00:14:52,454
You make peanuts!
335
00:14:52,456 --> 00:14:55,842
Yes, but we're married now.
336
00:14:55,844 --> 00:14:57,426
That means, when you
337
00:14:57,428 --> 00:15:00,179
get sick,
I take care of you.
338
00:15:00,181 --> 00:15:03,015
And when you make
a bunch of money,
339
00:15:03,017 --> 00:15:05,301
I get to buy stuff.
340
00:15:06,153 --> 00:15:08,654
Sorry if you
don't like it,
341
00:15:08,656 --> 00:15:11,324
but that's how
love works.
342
00:15:11,326 --> 00:15:13,976
No, here's how
love works.
343
00:15:13,978 --> 00:15:15,528
You're gonna return
the machine,
344
00:15:15,530 --> 00:15:17,864
or you can print out a
working set of lady parts
345
00:15:17,866 --> 00:15:19,315
and sleep with those.
346
00:15:21,368 --> 00:15:23,920
Oh, my God! Are you
actually thinking about it?
347
00:15:27,507 --> 00:15:28,824
All right, I don't understand.
348
00:15:28,826 --> 00:15:30,676
Why didn't you just
tell Kripke the truth?
349
00:15:30,678 --> 00:15:33,379
Because the truth
made me look bad,
350
00:15:33,381 --> 00:15:36,332
whereas a ridiculous bald-faced
lie makes me look good.
351
00:15:37,217 --> 00:15:38,217
Anyway,
352
00:15:38,219 --> 00:15:39,501
if Kripke asks,
353
00:15:39,503 --> 00:15:41,888
tell him my coitus with Amy
is frequent,
354
00:15:41,890 --> 00:15:44,907
intense and whimsically
inventive.
355
00:15:51,198 --> 00:15:53,783
Is my coitus
whimsically inventive?
356
00:15:54,735 --> 00:15:56,869
That is what I write
on the bathroom walls.
357
00:15:56,871 --> 00:15:58,621
"For a whimsically
inventive time,
358
00:15:58,623 --> 00:15:59,822
call Leonard Hofstadter."
359
00:16:03,026 --> 00:16:04,961
I know you're joking,
but I'd be okay with that.
360
00:16:04,986 --> 00:16:06,377
Yeah.
361
00:16:07,130 --> 00:16:08,714
Sheldon, can I ask you
a question?
362
00:16:08,716 --> 00:16:10,833
Of course.
You ever going to sleep with Amy?
363
00:16:14,171 --> 00:16:15,771
That's awfully personal.
364
00:16:15,773 --> 00:16:17,340
We don't ask Sheldon
things like that.
365
00:16:17,342 --> 00:16:18,540
Maybe you don't; I do.
366
00:16:18,542 --> 00:16:19,708
What's the deal?
367
00:16:20,911 --> 00:16:23,379
Well, word around the university
368
00:16:23,381 --> 00:16:26,616
is I'm giving her sex organs
a proper jostling.
369
00:16:26,618 --> 00:16:28,267
All right, come on,
be serious.
370
00:16:28,269 --> 00:16:30,519
Look, you guys have been
going out a long time.
371
00:16:30,521 --> 00:16:31,988
She would clearly like
372
00:16:31,990 --> 00:16:33,739
to have a physical
relationship with you,
373
00:16:33,741 --> 00:16:35,358
so what are you doing?
374
00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:36,892
All right, we're down
the rabbit hole.
375
00:16:36,894 --> 00:16:38,527
What are you doing?
376
00:16:38,529 --> 00:16:42,198
Well, first of all,
I'm quite fond of Amy.
377
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:43,699
Then what's
the problem?
378
00:16:43,701 --> 00:16:45,851
Penny...
379
00:16:45,853 --> 00:16:49,205
all my life,
I have been uncomfortable
380
00:16:49,207 --> 00:16:50,923
with the sort
of physical contact
381
00:16:50,925 --> 00:16:53,009
that comes easily
to others--
382
00:16:53,011 --> 00:16:55,645
hand-shaking, hugging,
383
00:16:55,647 --> 00:16:57,546
prostate exams.
384
00:17:01,351 --> 00:17:03,769
But I'm working on it,
you know?
385
00:17:03,771 --> 00:17:07,940
Just recently, I had to put
VapoRub on Amy's chest.
386
00:17:07,942 --> 00:17:10,643
A year ago, that would
have been unthinkable.
387
00:17:10,645 --> 00:17:14,230
Now you know how I feel
when I have to put it on you.
388
00:17:15,449 --> 00:17:17,450
Okay. Hang on.
389
00:17:17,452 --> 00:17:20,403
Are you saying someday
you and Amy might...
390
00:17:20,405 --> 00:17:23,789
actually get physical?
391
00:17:26,526 --> 00:17:28,110
It's a possibility.
392
00:17:30,964 --> 00:17:32,948
Oh, my God!
393
00:17:39,622 --> 00:17:41,173
Sheldon, I know this
wasn't easy for you,
394
00:17:41,175 --> 00:17:43,059
and I'm really glad we could
have this conversation.
395
00:17:43,061 --> 00:17:44,310
Oh, yeah.
396
00:17:45,295 --> 00:17:46,462
Ow!
397
00:17:50,728 --> 00:17:52,680
Are you sure you
want to do this?
398
00:17:52,682 --> 00:17:54,682
Give up your half
of the 3-D printer?
399
00:17:54,684 --> 00:17:56,017
Yes.
400
00:17:56,019 --> 00:17:58,303
And can you please make
that out to Bernadette?
401
00:17:58,305 --> 00:18:00,138
I was taken off
the joint account
402
00:18:00,140 --> 00:18:03,525
until I learn
the value of money.
403
00:18:05,061 --> 00:18:06,444
Wow, that's harsh.
404
00:18:06,446 --> 00:18:08,546
Tell me about it.
405
00:18:08,548 --> 00:18:10,615
Aren't you gonna eat lunch?
406
00:18:10,617 --> 00:18:14,602
Nah, I blew my food allowance
on Pokemon cards.
407
00:18:16,939 --> 00:18:20,592
Well, the equation
balances,
408
00:18:20,594 --> 00:18:22,327
but it's certainly
not elegant.
409
00:18:22,329 --> 00:18:24,445
Whatever.
You get any last night?
410
00:18:27,049 --> 00:18:28,633
Yes.
411
00:18:28,635 --> 00:18:31,052
Gave it to her good, huh?
412
00:18:31,887 --> 00:18:34,639
No, I gave it to her well.
413
00:18:37,126 --> 00:18:39,127
Now, over here,
I was thinking
414
00:18:39,129 --> 00:18:41,096
the turbulence could be
reduced if we just put...
415
00:18:41,098 --> 00:18:42,163
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
416
00:18:42,165 --> 00:18:45,150
Was she naked,
or was she wearing lingerie?
417
00:18:48,254 --> 00:18:49,938
I didn't notice.
418
00:18:50,773 --> 00:18:53,307
How could you
not notice?
419
00:18:53,309 --> 00:18:54,909
I was too busy
420
00:18:54,911 --> 00:18:57,979
squishing all the desirable
parts of her body.
421
00:18:57,981 --> 00:19:00,198
Ah, you're killing me, Cooper!
422
00:19:01,617 --> 00:19:03,501
Can we get back to work?
423
00:19:03,503 --> 00:19:06,254
Sure, sure, sure.
424
00:19:07,089 --> 00:19:08,957
You guys ever use any toys?
425
00:19:11,127 --> 00:19:12,660
Toys?
426
00:19:13,963 --> 00:19:17,265
I do have a model rocket
next to my bed.
427
00:19:17,267 --> 00:19:20,272
A rocket?
You're a freak! I love it!
428
00:19:20,372 --> 00:19:25,372
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