All language subtitles for 03 - Blind Date

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,267 --> 00:00:05,267 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:01:05,434 --> 00:01:08,501 ( singing in native language ) 3 00:01:13,033 --> 00:01:14,501 Everybody sing. 4 00:01:16,300 --> 00:01:17,767 Hey, Bobby... 5 00:01:17,801 --> 00:01:20,000 Hey. How come you look so happy? 6 00:01:20,033 --> 00:01:22,300 You know, this really strange thing happened to me last night. 7 00:01:22,334 --> 00:01:24,200 I called you up to see if you wanted 8 00:01:24,234 --> 00:01:25,934 to go out for a beer or something 9 00:01:25,968 --> 00:01:27,267 and you weren't home. Right. 10 00:01:27,300 --> 00:01:30,267 I talked to this girl on your answering service... 11 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:31,567 Named Angela. 12 00:01:31,601 --> 00:01:32,834 Oh, she's terrific. 13 00:01:32,868 --> 00:01:34,234 My favorite operator. 14 00:01:34,267 --> 00:01:36,200 You know, I call for my messages, 15 00:01:36,234 --> 00:01:37,567 and all the rest of them 16 00:01:37,601 --> 00:01:39,501 they just say, "Still nothing." 17 00:01:39,534 --> 00:01:41,667 You know, an actor doesn't like to hear that 18 00:01:41,701 --> 00:01:43,634 but Angela-- nobody called me-- 19 00:01:43,667 --> 00:01:46,100 she gives me other people's messages. 20 00:01:46,133 --> 00:01:48,934 Yeah, yeah, she really seemed nice on the phone, you know? 21 00:01:48,968 --> 00:01:50,467 Oh, unbelievably nice. 22 00:01:50,501 --> 00:01:51,734 LOUIE: Hey, Rieger? 23 00:01:51,767 --> 00:01:54,567 Sometimes she gives me Gene Shalit's messages. 24 00:01:54,601 --> 00:01:55,567 Really? 25 00:01:55,601 --> 00:01:56,634 Yeah. Gene and me 26 00:01:56,667 --> 00:01:58,667 we use the same service, you know. 27 00:01:58,701 --> 00:02:00,100 A lot of stars call him. 28 00:02:00,133 --> 00:02:01,934 You know who called him yesterday? 29 00:02:01,968 --> 00:02:02,467 Who? 30 00:02:02,501 --> 00:02:05,334 Erma Bombeck. 31 00:02:05,367 --> 00:02:08,901 Hey, you ever been out with Angela, Bobby? 32 00:02:08,934 --> 00:02:11,801 Angela? From your answering service? 33 00:02:11,834 --> 00:02:13,100 Oh, she's a peach. 34 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:16,033 One night she and I discussed my boxing career. 35 00:02:16,067 --> 00:02:17,367 You know, we never even met 36 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:20,467 and still we must have talked for around five minutes. 37 00:02:20,501 --> 00:02:24,968 That's longer than most of your fights last. 38 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,901 Yeah. 39 00:02:26,934 --> 00:02:30,033 We talked for a while too. 40 00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:31,667 Over an hour. 41 00:02:31,701 --> 00:02:33,234 Wow, an hour? Hold it. 42 00:02:33,267 --> 00:02:35,267 You tied up my line for an hour? 43 00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:37,567 Alex, I could be getting acting jobs 44 00:02:37,601 --> 00:02:38,701 during that time. 45 00:02:38,734 --> 00:02:40,234 I sort of forgot about the time. 46 00:02:40,267 --> 00:02:42,267 I mean she was so terrific on the phone. 47 00:02:42,300 --> 00:02:45,634 Hey, how come you never thought about asking her out? 48 00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:47,634 Well, I almost asked her out once 49 00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:50,033 but I decided against it, it wasn't worth the risk. 50 00:02:50,067 --> 00:02:51,334 What risk? 51 00:02:51,367 --> 00:02:53,300 She might turn out to be a dog. 52 00:02:53,334 --> 00:02:54,334 Oh. 53 00:02:54,367 --> 00:02:55,334 Geez. 54 00:02:55,367 --> 00:02:58,200 Did you just geez at me, Elaine? 55 00:02:58,234 --> 00:03:00,167 I can't believe you. I mean you wouldn't go out 56 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:01,868 with a woman if she wasn't good looking? 57 00:03:01,901 --> 00:03:03,367 Sure, I would. 58 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:05,567 If I was real drunk or something. 59 00:03:05,601 --> 00:03:08,701 Hey come on, Elaine. 60 00:03:08,734 --> 00:03:10,868 Looks matter to women too. 61 00:03:10,901 --> 00:03:14,400 How popular are short, pudgy, ugly men? 62 00:03:14,434 --> 00:03:16,200 Yeah. How popular, Louie? 63 00:03:16,234 --> 00:03:17,868 You know, Bobby 64 00:03:17,901 --> 00:03:20,567 I hope someone slams a door on your nose 65 00:03:20,601 --> 00:03:24,100 and you sneeze and your head explodes. 66 00:03:25,667 --> 00:03:29,601 If you had such a good conversation with her, Alex 67 00:03:29,634 --> 00:03:31,734 why don't you ask her out? 68 00:03:31,767 --> 00:03:34,234 Well, I'm thinking about it. 69 00:03:34,267 --> 00:03:37,234 Yeah, well, I got to call for my messages. 70 00:03:37,267 --> 00:03:39,501 Hey, if Angela should happen to answer 71 00:03:39,534 --> 00:03:40,701 should I... 72 00:03:40,734 --> 00:03:41,701 No. 73 00:03:41,734 --> 00:03:44,267 All right, whatever, but you better move fast. 74 00:03:44,300 --> 00:03:45,234 Why? 75 00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:47,567 So you can tell me what she's like. 76 00:03:47,601 --> 00:03:48,934 Hi. 77 00:03:48,968 --> 00:03:51,367 Any for Wheeler, 131? 78 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:54,167 Anything for Shalit? 79 00:03:55,434 --> 00:03:59,567 Hey, Angela, how'd you like talking to my friend, Alex? 80 00:03:59,601 --> 00:04:00,934 Oh, yeah. 81 00:04:00,968 --> 00:04:02,901 He's even better than he sounds. 82 00:04:02,934 --> 00:04:04,834 Sure. I'll describe him to you. 83 00:04:04,868 --> 00:04:07,667 Before Bobby gets cute, I, uh... 84 00:04:07,701 --> 00:04:09,467 Oh, this is Alex. 85 00:04:09,501 --> 00:04:11,400 Oh, yeah? 86 00:04:13,334 --> 00:04:15,501 Yeah, I remember your voice, too 87 00:04:15,534 --> 00:04:17,567 even though I knew it was you. 88 00:04:17,601 --> 00:04:20,234 I mean, even if I didn't know it was you 89 00:04:20,267 --> 00:04:23,501 and I heard your voice, I would know it was you. 90 00:04:23,534 --> 00:04:25,267 You want to go out with me? 91 00:04:25,300 --> 00:04:26,267 Smooth, Alex. 92 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:27,901 Would you get out of here? 93 00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:28,901 Oh, boy. 94 00:04:28,934 --> 00:04:29,968 What, "Oh, boy?" 95 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,200 What you got there, Latka? 96 00:04:31,234 --> 00:04:34,167 ( speaking native language ) 97 00:04:35,634 --> 00:04:37,200 Okay, okay, Latka. 98 00:04:37,234 --> 00:04:38,434 Shh! Slow down, okay? 99 00:04:38,467 --> 00:04:39,434 Slow down. 100 00:04:39,467 --> 00:04:40,701 Okay. 101 00:04:40,734 --> 00:04:44,267 ( speaking native language slowly ) 102 00:04:51,834 --> 00:04:53,400 You found it on the back seat. 103 00:04:53,434 --> 00:04:55,267 Yeah. 104 00:04:55,300 --> 00:04:57,501 2,000 bucks. 105 00:04:57,534 --> 00:04:59,634 2,000 smackers. 106 00:04:59,667 --> 00:05:03,000 Not smackers. Bucks. 107 00:05:03,033 --> 00:05:07,434 Latka, you found the 2,000 bucks 108 00:05:07,467 --> 00:05:08,968 I've been looking for. 109 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:10,801 Hey, you never lost 2,000 bucks. 110 00:05:10,834 --> 00:05:12,167 I didn't say I lost it. 111 00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:13,868 I just said I was looking for it. 112 00:05:13,901 --> 00:05:16,634 I've been looking for 2,000 bucks all my life. 113 00:05:16,667 --> 00:05:19,200 Hands off, Louie. 114 00:05:19,234 --> 00:05:20,701 MAN: Hey, Louie... 115 00:05:20,734 --> 00:05:22,200 it's your mother calling. 116 00:05:22,234 --> 00:05:24,968 She says somebody's trying to break into her apartment. 117 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,367 Tell her I'll get back to her. 118 00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:29,200 That's your mother. 119 00:05:29,234 --> 00:05:31,267 All right. I'll talk to her now. 120 00:05:31,300 --> 00:05:33,801 Don't do nothing with that money while I'm gone. 121 00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:37,634 Listen, somebody has to bring this up. 122 00:05:37,667 --> 00:05:39,834 The hack rules say that this money 123 00:05:39,868 --> 00:05:42,467 must be returned to the police precinct. 124 00:05:42,501 --> 00:05:43,467 No police. 125 00:05:43,501 --> 00:05:44,701 Oh, it's okay, if we turn it in 126 00:05:44,734 --> 00:05:46,968 and nobody claims it within 90 days 127 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:48,634 then it's returned to us, free and clear. 128 00:05:48,667 --> 00:05:52,000 No police, no police, no nothing. 129 00:05:52,033 --> 00:05:53,467 Just money. 130 00:05:55,767 --> 00:05:58,467 You know, it's probably dirty money, right? 131 00:05:58,501 --> 00:06:00,133 I mean what kind of decent person 132 00:06:00,167 --> 00:06:02,968 walks around with 2,000 bucks in cash, right? 133 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,634 A priest who collected it 134 00:06:04,667 --> 00:06:07,133 for underprivileged crippled children. 135 00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:10,534 Or a nun on her way to send it to starving natives. 136 00:06:11,534 --> 00:06:13,567 Or a hooker. 137 00:06:14,934 --> 00:06:17,501 Hey, Alex, listen, we got a little problem. 138 00:06:17,534 --> 00:06:19,901 Latka just found this bunch of money... 139 00:06:19,934 --> 00:06:22,234 ( speaking native language ) 140 00:06:25,934 --> 00:06:28,501 Oh, it gets better every time he tells it. 141 00:06:28,534 --> 00:06:31,100 Anyway, we're trying to decide what to do. 142 00:06:31,133 --> 00:06:33,000 Yeah? Good. I got to leave. I got a date. 143 00:06:33,033 --> 00:06:34,000 With Angela? 144 00:06:34,033 --> 00:06:35,000 Uh-huh. 145 00:06:35,033 --> 00:06:36,300 Hey, way to go. 146 00:06:36,334 --> 00:06:39,200 I never worked so hard for a date in my life. 147 00:06:39,234 --> 00:06:40,534 Hey, where you taking her? 148 00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:42,701 Well, I thought I'd take her to dinner, uh, Mario's. 149 00:06:42,734 --> 00:06:44,868 It's a nice place, but stay away 150 00:06:44,901 --> 00:06:47,534 from the clams oreganata with eggplant. 151 00:06:47,567 --> 00:06:49,467 It killed my sister-in-law. 152 00:06:50,534 --> 00:06:53,067 Have a good time, Alex. 153 00:07:17,934 --> 00:07:19,767 Doesn't get any better. 154 00:07:21,067 --> 00:07:24,234 Hi. I'm Alex. 155 00:07:24,267 --> 00:07:25,567 You blew it. You could have said 156 00:07:25,601 --> 00:07:27,234 you were looking for another apartment. 157 00:07:27,267 --> 00:07:29,501 No. I was looking for this one, 3-D. 158 00:07:29,534 --> 00:07:31,968 It fell off when I knocked on... door. 159 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:33,334 Well, my admirers 160 00:07:33,367 --> 00:07:36,868 will just have to wander the halls looking for me. 161 00:07:36,901 --> 00:07:39,767 I hate to disappoint you, but I'm Angela. 162 00:07:39,801 --> 00:07:42,934 Oh. Here's your "D." 163 00:07:42,968 --> 00:07:44,234 You want to come in? 164 00:07:44,267 --> 00:07:47,300 Huh? Yeah. Sure. 165 00:07:48,934 --> 00:07:51,133 You got guts. 166 00:07:57,033 --> 00:07:58,334 It's very nice. 167 00:07:58,367 --> 00:07:59,968 You're doing very well. 168 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,033 Huh? 169 00:08:01,067 --> 00:08:02,534 The smile, I mean. 170 00:08:02,567 --> 00:08:06,300 Most guys drop it ten seconds after they see me. 171 00:08:06,334 --> 00:08:08,367 You can stop now. 172 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:09,701 You've got the record. 173 00:08:09,734 --> 00:08:11,968 Say... 174 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:15,267 so, Angela... 175 00:08:15,300 --> 00:08:17,267 This is really very nice. 176 00:08:17,300 --> 00:08:19,200 Do you want to use the phone? 177 00:08:19,234 --> 00:08:20,200 What for? 178 00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:21,534 To call your mother. 179 00:08:21,567 --> 00:08:23,934 Maybe you'll be lucky and she'll be sick 180 00:08:23,968 --> 00:08:26,334 and you'll have to run over and see her. 181 00:08:26,367 --> 00:08:29,167 ( laughs ) 182 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,167 That's some sense of humor you got there, Angela. 183 00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:34,434 Well, listen, our dinner reservations 184 00:08:34,467 --> 00:08:35,934 aren't for about an hour 185 00:08:35,968 --> 00:08:38,067 so you want to get something first somewhere else-- 186 00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:39,033 a drink or something? 187 00:08:39,067 --> 00:08:40,367 You must know 188 00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:43,033 a really dark bar where no one will see us. 189 00:08:43,067 --> 00:08:46,067 We don't have to go anywhere if you don't want to. 190 00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:47,634 We can have a drink here. 191 00:08:47,667 --> 00:08:50,734 Sure, why take any chance on anyone seeing you with me. 192 00:08:50,767 --> 00:08:51,968 What would you like to drink? 193 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:54,501 What do you got? 194 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,367 Malteds. 195 00:08:56,400 --> 00:09:00,567 Listen, we can get something at the restaurant. 196 00:09:00,601 --> 00:09:02,534 Hope you like Italian. 197 00:09:02,567 --> 00:09:03,534 Doesn't matter. 198 00:09:03,567 --> 00:09:05,467 As you can see, I eat anything. 199 00:09:06,567 --> 00:09:08,868 If you want, I could fix you something here. 200 00:09:08,901 --> 00:09:10,834 You don't want to go out? 201 00:09:10,868 --> 00:09:11,968 I don't care. 202 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,367 I was just trying to make it easy on you. 203 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:16,701 Get your coat. 204 00:09:16,734 --> 00:09:18,501 What are you trying to prove? 205 00:09:18,534 --> 00:09:20,033 That you're a great guy? 206 00:09:20,067 --> 00:09:22,501 Okay. You're a great guy. A real prince. 207 00:09:22,534 --> 00:09:25,434 Um... here. 208 00:09:25,467 --> 00:09:27,534 Here's your coat. 209 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,901 You don't know when to quit, do you? 210 00:09:29,934 --> 00:09:32,067 Hey, I asked you out for dinner, we're going out for dinner. 211 00:09:34,868 --> 00:09:36,067 It will be fun. 212 00:09:36,100 --> 00:09:38,200 You'll see. 213 00:09:38,234 --> 00:09:39,901 Fat chance. 214 00:09:44,767 --> 00:09:47,834 Do you like clams oreganata with eggplant? 215 00:10:03,334 --> 00:10:05,267 I never met anybody 216 00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:06,834 who liked anchovies. 217 00:10:06,868 --> 00:10:09,300 Rich people probably like them. 218 00:10:09,334 --> 00:10:11,200 Rich people like anything 219 00:10:11,234 --> 00:10:14,934 that's small that tastes weird. 220 00:10:16,667 --> 00:10:18,801 Why don't you drop the act now, huh? 221 00:10:18,834 --> 00:10:19,901 What? What act? 222 00:10:19,934 --> 00:10:21,968 Pretending that you're not having a lousy time. 223 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,667 Hey, come on, Angela, would you? 224 00:10:25,100 --> 00:10:27,400 What do you still got your coat on for? 225 00:10:27,434 --> 00:10:29,567 The management requested it. 226 00:10:29,601 --> 00:10:32,100 Don't you care for your salad? 227 00:10:32,133 --> 00:10:34,567 I wouldn't know if I cared for it or not. 228 00:10:34,601 --> 00:10:35,567 I didn't eat it. 229 00:10:35,601 --> 00:10:36,901 Hey, what's with you? 230 00:10:36,934 --> 00:10:39,067 What's the matter? Aren't you having a good time anymore? 231 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:40,868 I once went out with a girl 232 00:10:40,901 --> 00:10:43,133 who pulled a knife on me, robbed me 233 00:10:43,167 --> 00:10:46,734 and threw me out of her car on the New Jersey turnpike. 234 00:10:46,767 --> 00:10:49,901 I have to think about that now as a medium date. 235 00:10:49,934 --> 00:10:52,634 So you want to take me home now? 236 00:10:52,667 --> 00:10:54,367 Yeah, I'd be happy to. 237 00:10:57,167 --> 00:10:58,501 There he is. 238 00:10:58,534 --> 00:11:00,000 Let's go out this way. 239 00:11:02,934 --> 00:11:04,601 Hey, Alex, I'm really sorry. 240 00:11:04,634 --> 00:11:05,868 I tried to stop them 241 00:11:05,901 --> 00:11:08,067 from coming down and bothering you. 242 00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:09,300 Angela Matusa 243 00:11:09,334 --> 00:11:12,601 this is Tony Banta, John Burns, Latka Gravas 244 00:11:12,634 --> 00:11:15,434 and Bobby Wheeler, who I guess you sort of know. 245 00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:17,634 Nice to finally meet you, Angela. 246 00:11:17,667 --> 00:11:19,634 Am I what you pictured, Bobby? 247 00:11:19,667 --> 00:11:22,801 Yeah, more or less. 248 00:11:22,834 --> 00:11:25,734 More. 249 00:11:25,767 --> 00:11:27,367 What are you guys doing here? 250 00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:28,367 ANGELA: If you'll excuse me. 251 00:11:28,400 --> 00:11:30,601 I have to use the ladies' room. 252 00:11:33,267 --> 00:11:34,400 Hey, Alex... 253 00:11:34,434 --> 00:11:35,734 So how's your big date? 254 00:11:35,767 --> 00:11:37,133 All right, stop that. 255 00:11:37,167 --> 00:11:38,167 ( laughter ) 256 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:39,300 That's not funny. 257 00:11:39,334 --> 00:11:40,567 Hey. 258 00:11:40,601 --> 00:11:43,200 ( speaking native language ) 259 00:11:44,434 --> 00:11:46,167 I think Latka likes her. 260 00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:47,267 Do you like her, Latka? 261 00:11:47,300 --> 00:11:48,968 Maybe Alex will give you her number. 262 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,901 You could call her up for tomorrow night. 263 00:11:50,934 --> 00:11:52,934 Oh, no. Thank you very much. 264 00:11:54,501 --> 00:11:55,734 All right, what do you clowns want? 265 00:11:59,300 --> 00:12:02,601 Yeah. Why don't you sit down? 266 00:12:02,634 --> 00:12:04,567 Well, you know the money that Latka found? 267 00:12:04,601 --> 00:12:06,667 We're still trying to decide what to do with it. 268 00:12:06,701 --> 00:12:08,334 We wanted you to hold onto it 269 00:12:08,367 --> 00:12:10,601 until we figure out what to do with it, all right? 270 00:12:10,634 --> 00:12:11,934 Yeah, because otherwise 271 00:12:11,968 --> 00:12:15,000 we're going to have to spend the night as a group 272 00:12:15,033 --> 00:12:16,834 'cause nobody trusts nobody. 273 00:12:16,868 --> 00:12:17,968 Except you. 274 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,534 Everybody trusts you. 275 00:12:19,567 --> 00:12:21,567 Okay. 276 00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:24,100 Want to give us 277 00:12:24,133 --> 00:12:25,601 a receipt? 278 00:12:26,567 --> 00:12:28,501 Oh, here comes Angela. 279 00:12:31,434 --> 00:12:32,868 Now be polite, huh? 280 00:12:32,901 --> 00:12:34,234 Control yourself. 281 00:12:34,267 --> 00:12:35,467 Oh, hi. 282 00:12:35,501 --> 00:12:36,868 Good to see you back. 283 00:12:36,901 --> 00:12:38,434 Everything go all right 284 00:12:38,467 --> 00:12:39,734 in the ladies' room? 285 00:12:39,767 --> 00:12:41,267 We should be going now. 286 00:12:41,300 --> 00:12:42,901 Nice meeting you, Angela. 287 00:12:42,934 --> 00:12:43,901 See you. 288 00:12:43,934 --> 00:12:45,267 Yeah, so long. 289 00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:48,567 Bet your friends 290 00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:50,634 got quite a kick out of me, huh? 291 00:12:50,667 --> 00:12:51,934 What do you mean? 292 00:12:51,968 --> 00:12:54,267 I heard them all break up when I left. 293 00:12:54,300 --> 00:12:55,534 They weren't laughing at you. 294 00:12:55,567 --> 00:12:56,300 No? 295 00:12:56,334 --> 00:12:57,200 No. 296 00:12:58,501 --> 00:13:00,701 One of the guys told a joke. 297 00:13:00,734 --> 00:13:03,367 Why are you afraid to tell me they were laughing at me? I can take it. 298 00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:05,501 Because they weren't. Now can we drop this? 299 00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:07,934 All I know is, I heard a big laugh when I left the table. 300 00:13:07,968 --> 00:13:09,300 I told you what it was. 301 00:13:09,334 --> 00:13:10,834 What do you want from me? 302 00:13:10,868 --> 00:13:12,133 I want you to stop lying to me. 303 00:13:12,167 --> 00:13:15,167 You've been lying to me all night, and I'm sick of it. 304 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:18,167 Okay. 305 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,234 They were laughing at you, okay? 306 00:13:22,901 --> 00:13:24,434 You could have held out. 307 00:13:24,467 --> 00:13:26,634 I was almost ready to believe you. 308 00:13:26,667 --> 00:13:27,567 Look, you don't have 309 00:13:27,601 --> 00:13:29,400 to bother seeing me home. 310 00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:30,501 No, I'll take you. 311 00:13:30,534 --> 00:13:32,634 No, really. I'm one of the few women in New York 312 00:13:32,667 --> 00:13:34,167 who's safe on the streets. 313 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:36,567 Come on, you came with me, you're leaving with me. 314 00:13:36,601 --> 00:13:38,567 Listen, let's not spoil a lovely evening 315 00:13:38,601 --> 00:13:39,634 by arguing, okay? 316 00:13:39,667 --> 00:13:40,767 And hey, don't worry. You did your duty. 317 00:13:40,801 --> 00:13:42,767 You proved you were a nice guy. 318 00:13:42,801 --> 00:13:44,734 I'm taking you. 319 00:13:44,767 --> 00:13:46,167 Get your paws off me. 320 00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:49,033 They give you a little dinner, they think they own you. 321 00:14:02,567 --> 00:14:04,868 Latka! Will you cut it out?! 322 00:14:04,901 --> 00:14:08,267 You're not going to find any more money. 323 00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:11,501 Besides, these cabs got to go out soon 324 00:14:11,534 --> 00:14:15,000 but they can't go out with no back seats 325 00:14:15,033 --> 00:14:18,067 'cause where will our passengers sit? 326 00:14:18,834 --> 00:14:20,367 You want them to squat 327 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:22,133 on the floor like ducks? 328 00:14:22,167 --> 00:14:24,067 Okay. 329 00:14:24,100 --> 00:14:26,100 Put the damn seats back 330 00:14:26,133 --> 00:14:27,801 you dumb foreigner. 331 00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:28,934 Come on! 332 00:14:28,968 --> 00:14:30,200 Foreigner? 333 00:14:30,234 --> 00:14:31,334 Yeah. 334 00:14:31,367 --> 00:14:32,367 Did you said foreigner? 335 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:33,200 Yeah. 336 00:14:33,234 --> 00:14:35,234 For you. 337 00:14:37,234 --> 00:14:39,501 What's that mean? 338 00:14:39,534 --> 00:14:40,868 Means this. 339 00:14:43,534 --> 00:14:46,801 You better smile when you do that, buddy. 340 00:14:46,834 --> 00:14:48,100 Oh, yeah? 341 00:14:50,434 --> 00:14:53,400 Okay, pal, mull this one over. 342 00:14:55,367 --> 00:14:56,467 Oh, all right. 343 00:14:56,501 --> 00:14:58,067 I accept your apology. 344 00:15:06,267 --> 00:15:08,534 But we still don't know who was driving 345 00:15:08,567 --> 00:15:10,400 when the money was left in it. 346 00:15:11,534 --> 00:15:12,567 Hi, Alex. 347 00:15:12,601 --> 00:15:15,167 Hey, Alex, did you score? 348 00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:16,834 Shut up. 349 00:15:16,868 --> 00:15:19,067 I guess not. 350 00:15:20,634 --> 00:15:22,067 Geez. 351 00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:24,167 I heard about your date. 352 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:25,267 Oh, yeah? 353 00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:26,434 Yeah. 354 00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:27,801 I wonder how come? 355 00:15:27,834 --> 00:15:32,667 You get some real kooks on blind dates, boy. 356 00:15:32,701 --> 00:15:34,234 Like this one. 357 00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:37,968 I show up-- looking good, per usual-- 358 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:41,501 and this girl comes to the door. 359 00:15:41,534 --> 00:15:42,634 Beautiful. 360 00:15:42,667 --> 00:15:44,434 Not your type. 361 00:15:44,467 --> 00:15:46,667 Right, 'cause to be honest 362 00:15:46,701 --> 00:15:50,634 I prefer my women "H and H"-- homely and hot. 363 00:15:50,667 --> 00:15:52,033 I misjudged you, Louie. 364 00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:53,901 You're really a poet, you know? 365 00:15:53,934 --> 00:15:55,033 You bet. 366 00:15:55,067 --> 00:15:57,200 Can I have my receipt, please? 367 00:15:57,234 --> 00:16:00,868 Anyway, all of a sudden, she says, "I feel sick." 368 00:16:00,901 --> 00:16:04,200 Tells me she thinks she was exposed to cholera 369 00:16:04,234 --> 00:16:05,501 earlier that day. 370 00:16:05,534 --> 00:16:08,067 So, what did you do? 371 00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:09,901 I tried to take her blouse off. 372 00:16:09,934 --> 00:16:11,834 It's not my fault she feels sick 373 00:16:11,868 --> 00:16:14,501 so why shouldn't one of us have a good time, right? 374 00:16:14,534 --> 00:16:17,234 You know, every time I talk to you, Louie 375 00:16:17,267 --> 00:16:19,968 I feel grateful that I haven't eaten yet. 376 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,534 Heard about your date. 377 00:16:21,567 --> 00:16:24,868 Oh, yeah, what was it, broadcast over the PA? 378 00:16:24,901 --> 00:16:26,267 Yeah. 379 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,367 Hey, Elaine, can I talk to you 380 00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:32,434 for a minute? 381 00:16:32,467 --> 00:16:33,701 Yeah, sure. 382 00:16:33,734 --> 00:16:35,234 I don't want any advice. 383 00:16:35,267 --> 00:16:36,567 I just want to talk. 384 00:16:36,601 --> 00:16:37,801 Go ahead. 385 00:16:37,834 --> 00:16:41,033 I can't stop thinking about that girl. 386 00:16:41,067 --> 00:16:43,267 You know, you're a terrific guy. 387 00:16:43,300 --> 00:16:44,634 That's not what I want to hear. 388 00:16:44,667 --> 00:16:46,734 It just goes to show you how terrific you are. 389 00:16:46,767 --> 00:16:48,367 All night long, she kept accusing me 390 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:49,701 of going through the motions-- 391 00:16:49,734 --> 00:16:52,033 that I wouldn't call her again because of her looks 392 00:16:52,067 --> 00:16:54,234 and I kept telling her she was wrong. 393 00:16:54,267 --> 00:16:55,534 Terrific. 394 00:16:55,567 --> 00:16:56,834 But she wasn't wrong. 395 00:16:56,868 --> 00:16:57,968 Oh, Alex, you too? 396 00:16:58,033 --> 00:17:00,133 No. Listen, what I can't figure out 397 00:17:00,167 --> 00:17:02,534 is that hour I had with her on the phone 398 00:17:02,567 --> 00:17:05,767 was one of the greatest conversations I've ever had. 399 00:17:05,801 --> 00:17:07,634 A witty, bright, sensitive girl 400 00:17:07,667 --> 00:17:09,667 who came to the door disappeared. 401 00:17:09,701 --> 00:17:11,000 What happened to her? 402 00:17:11,033 --> 00:17:13,934 Maybe Angela ate her. 403 00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:21,767 It wasn't just her looks. 404 00:17:21,801 --> 00:17:24,300 She was also the bitterest, surliest 405 00:17:24,334 --> 00:17:26,667 most depressing person I ever met. 406 00:17:26,701 --> 00:17:30,367 So, how come I feel like I have to go see her again? 407 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:31,434 I don't know. 408 00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:33,033 You got an answer for that? 409 00:17:33,067 --> 00:17:34,100 Yeah, I feel like 410 00:17:34,133 --> 00:17:36,067 I'm walking away from a car wreck 411 00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:37,901 with a person trapped inside. 412 00:17:37,934 --> 00:17:39,701 That's true. 413 00:17:39,734 --> 00:17:42,667 I'm going to go see her. 414 00:17:42,701 --> 00:17:43,767 Oh, before I forget 415 00:17:43,801 --> 00:17:45,868 you can give us that money back now. 416 00:17:45,901 --> 00:17:47,601 Even though we're nowhere near 417 00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:49,267 figuring out how to split it. 418 00:17:49,300 --> 00:17:50,501 Hey, listen, Latka found it. 419 00:17:50,534 --> 00:17:51,767 Why don't you give it all to him? 420 00:17:51,801 --> 00:17:54,033 That's one we didn't think of. 421 00:17:54,067 --> 00:17:55,767 What are you talking about? 422 00:17:55,801 --> 00:17:59,033 He doesn't know what to do with that kind of money. 423 00:17:59,067 --> 00:18:00,934 Yeah, he'll probably just blow it 424 00:18:00,968 --> 00:18:02,601 on rent or food or something. 425 00:18:02,634 --> 00:18:04,734 How can you give it to him? 426 00:18:04,767 --> 00:18:07,767 You want to pop the veins in my head? 427 00:18:07,801 --> 00:18:10,901 Here, Latka, take your money. 428 00:18:12,767 --> 00:18:14,667 Okay, you guys. 429 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:18,934 ( speaking native language ) 430 00:18:20,734 --> 00:18:23,634 Thank you very much. 431 00:18:27,367 --> 00:18:28,400 Hey, no, no. 432 00:18:28,434 --> 00:18:29,734 Latka, Latka, please. 433 00:18:29,767 --> 00:18:30,868 Please, not now. 434 00:19:00,701 --> 00:19:02,667 Let's make it seven out of 13. 435 00:19:08,334 --> 00:19:10,267 What are you doing this time 436 00:19:10,300 --> 00:19:12,300 praying nobody will be home? 437 00:19:12,334 --> 00:19:16,000 Huh? No. Listen, I just dropped by because I, I... 438 00:19:16,033 --> 00:19:17,200 Come in if you want. 439 00:19:17,234 --> 00:19:19,367 Okay. 440 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:23,634 I guess I should have called first, but, uh... 441 00:19:23,667 --> 00:19:25,801 Hey, is this our second date? 442 00:19:25,834 --> 00:19:26,801 I don't know. 443 00:19:26,834 --> 00:19:28,701 Let's say it is. I've never had one. 444 00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:31,000 Okay, it's our second date. 445 00:19:31,033 --> 00:19:34,000 Good, so far it looks like I haven't been missing anything. 446 00:19:34,033 --> 00:19:36,434 Hey, Angela? Will you just let me get out what I have to say? 447 00:19:36,467 --> 00:19:37,701 Because I don't want to end up 448 00:19:37,734 --> 00:19:40,100 with us doing that stupid stuff that we did last night. 449 00:19:40,133 --> 00:19:41,334 You mean falling in love? 450 00:19:41,367 --> 00:19:42,968 Would you like to hear what I have to say or not? 451 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,000 Can I get a drink first? 452 00:19:44,033 --> 00:19:45,901 I have a feeling I'm going to need a drink. 453 00:19:45,934 --> 00:19:47,234 Yeah, go ahead. 454 00:19:47,267 --> 00:19:48,834 You want anything? No, thanks. 455 00:19:48,868 --> 00:19:51,400 So, what's on your mind? 456 00:19:53,267 --> 00:19:54,567 Well, I, uh... 457 00:19:54,601 --> 00:19:56,033 I don't really know. 458 00:19:56,067 --> 00:19:58,033 I, uh... 459 00:19:58,067 --> 00:20:01,667 I guess I would sort of like to get to know you better. 460 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:02,667 Why? 461 00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:03,868 Why not? 462 00:20:03,901 --> 00:20:06,534 Well, you might not know to look at me 463 00:20:06,567 --> 00:20:10,567 but I'm not exactly beautiful, or, uh, even good-looking. 464 00:20:10,601 --> 00:20:12,033 I'm not quite plain. 465 00:20:12,067 --> 00:20:15,300 Now, feel free to jump in and stop me anytime. 466 00:20:15,334 --> 00:20:16,434 Hey, come on. 467 00:20:16,467 --> 00:20:18,467 I'm no Robert Redford, you know. 468 00:20:18,501 --> 00:20:21,000 I wouldn't mind looking like you if I was a man. 469 00:20:21,033 --> 00:20:22,701 Would you want to look like me? 470 00:20:22,734 --> 00:20:24,400 Wouldn't be so bad. 471 00:20:24,434 --> 00:20:27,634 I'd, you know, kind of fix up my hair 472 00:20:27,667 --> 00:20:31,868 and, uh... I'd do that sort of stuff with makeup 473 00:20:31,901 --> 00:20:36,200 and, uh, I'd go to a gym, and I'd work on myself. 474 00:20:36,234 --> 00:20:37,868 I mean, that's what I would do. 475 00:20:37,901 --> 00:20:40,501 Not that I'm saying that you should do anything. 476 00:20:40,534 --> 00:20:43,334 It's just what I would do. 477 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:46,567 Okay, let's say I did all the hairdo and makeup 478 00:20:46,601 --> 00:20:49,033 and everything and dropped ten or 70 pounds. 479 00:20:49,067 --> 00:20:50,868 Do you think I'd be attractive? 480 00:20:52,634 --> 00:20:54,300 Do you think I'd be attractive? 481 00:20:55,968 --> 00:20:57,467 Yeah, sure, why not? 482 00:20:57,501 --> 00:20:59,133 In a romantic sort of way? 483 00:20:59,167 --> 00:21:01,300 You don't have to answer. 484 00:21:01,334 --> 00:21:03,200 You could just nod. 485 00:21:03,234 --> 00:21:05,133 Hey, look, I'm not, uh... 486 00:21:05,167 --> 00:21:09,000 I haven't been romantically involved in eight years 487 00:21:09,033 --> 00:21:12,567 and I'm not about to break my streak right now. 488 00:21:12,601 --> 00:21:14,767 Hey, look, but we, uh... we did have fun 489 00:21:14,801 --> 00:21:17,300 talking on the phone the other day, didn't we? 490 00:21:17,334 --> 00:21:19,133 I mean, that was sort of special. 491 00:21:19,167 --> 00:21:21,467 Hey, look, I swear I'm not that comfortable 492 00:21:21,501 --> 00:21:22,734 with that many people. 493 00:21:23,934 --> 00:21:26,400 I just think that we could get to be friends. 494 00:21:26,434 --> 00:21:28,534 I can't believe you came all the way back here 495 00:21:28,567 --> 00:21:30,133 just because you forgot to give me 496 00:21:30,167 --> 00:21:31,601 the "let's be friends" speech. 497 00:21:31,634 --> 00:21:33,100 Hey, can we drop that? 498 00:21:33,133 --> 00:21:37,234 I just think I'd like to get to know you better, that's all. 499 00:21:37,267 --> 00:21:38,734 You want me to open up? 500 00:21:38,767 --> 00:21:41,300 Would that make you happy? 501 00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:43,200 Make you feel like 502 00:21:43,234 --> 00:21:46,767 you did your good deed for the day? 503 00:21:46,801 --> 00:21:48,167 Okay. Okay. 504 00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:49,767 But then you better plan on sticking around. 505 00:21:49,801 --> 00:21:51,300 Because I'm not standing here alone 506 00:21:51,334 --> 00:21:53,968 with my insides on the floor, while you walk out 507 00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,300 feeling you did the poor fat girl some big favor 508 00:21:56,334 --> 00:21:58,934 by helping her get in touch with her feelings. 509 00:22:01,501 --> 00:22:03,133 You want to be a hero? 510 00:22:03,167 --> 00:22:04,601 Then be prepared to stick around 511 00:22:04,634 --> 00:22:06,100 for the rest of the war, okay? 512 00:22:07,300 --> 00:22:09,167 Maybe I will. 513 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:10,667 But can we start slower-- 514 00:22:10,701 --> 00:22:12,234 like where we went to high school 515 00:22:12,267 --> 00:22:14,767 and then we'll work up to your insides on the floor? 516 00:22:20,534 --> 00:22:25,601 Hey, Angela, I think we had a normal moment there. 517 00:22:25,634 --> 00:22:26,934 Huh? 518 00:22:29,334 --> 00:22:31,067 Well, listen, uh, you don't mind 519 00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:32,434 if I get a little clear 520 00:22:32,467 --> 00:22:34,634 on what we're trying to establish here. 521 00:22:34,667 --> 00:22:36,634 It wouldn't make you nuts, would it? 522 00:22:36,667 --> 00:22:38,367 No, it would not make me nuts. 523 00:22:42,701 --> 00:22:43,901 So, uh... 524 00:22:43,934 --> 00:22:46,367 so, what it is, is, is... 525 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:50,334 I could call you whenever I feel like it? 526 00:22:50,367 --> 00:22:53,734 If I need advice, I could call you? 527 00:22:53,767 --> 00:22:56,133 Yeah. 528 00:22:57,634 --> 00:23:01,367 Uh... if you need advice, you could call me? 529 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:03,200 Yup. 530 00:23:03,234 --> 00:23:06,834 If we have something interesting happening 531 00:23:06,868 --> 00:23:09,067 we could call each other? 532 00:23:09,100 --> 00:23:11,434 Yeah. 533 00:23:11,467 --> 00:23:14,167 We could call just to shoot the breeze? 534 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,501 Yeah. 535 00:23:17,868 --> 00:23:18,868 Yup. 536 00:23:18,901 --> 00:23:23,300 Or, uh... 537 00:23:23,334 --> 00:23:26,767 if I just need a hug? 538 00:23:40,434 --> 00:23:44,501 Uh, you know how long it's been since I cried? 539 00:23:44,534 --> 00:23:46,400 No. 540 00:23:46,434 --> 00:23:48,267 A half an hour. 541 00:23:59,734 --> 00:24:02,667 ( theme music playing ) 542 00:24:26,767 --> 00:24:28,534 WOMAN: Night, Mr. Walters. 543 00:24:28,567 --> 00:24:29,667 ( grunts ) 37187

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