subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah (2023)

Afrikaans

Albanian Download

Amharic

Arabic Download

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bengali

Bosnian

Bulgarian Download

Catalan

Cebuano

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified) Download

Chinese (Traditional) Download

Corsican

Croatian Download

Czech

Danish

Dutch Download

English Download

Esperanto

Estonian

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian Download

Icelandic Download

Igbo

Indonesian

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Khmer

Korean

Kurdish (Kurmanji)

Kyrgyz

Lao

Latin

Latvian

Lithuanian

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Nepali

Norwegian

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese

Punjabi

Romanian

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Sesotho

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhala Download

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish Download

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Telugu

Thai

Turkish Download

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Odia (Oriya)

Kinyarwanda

Turkmen

Tatar

Uyghur

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:38,313 --> 00:00:39,771 [Stacy] All across the world, 2 00:00:39,855 --> 00:00:42,355 and maybe ever since the beginning of time, 3 00:00:42,438 --> 00:00:46,063 different cultures had different ways of celebrating a kid coming of age. 4 00:00:47,771 --> 00:00:49,105 There's the quinceañera. 5 00:00:50,146 --> 00:00:52,188 -There's Sweet 16. -[indistinct laughter] 6 00:00:52,271 --> 00:00:54,688 [Stacy] There's also something called land diving. 7 00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:57,980 My dad told me that in the Brazilian Amazon, 8 00:00:58,063 --> 00:01:00,271 there's this thing called a bullet ant initiation 9 00:01:00,355 --> 00:01:03,480 where fire ants crawl all over your hands and bite you. 10 00:01:03,563 --> 00:01:06,188 And if you can handle the pain, you're ready to be a man. 11 00:01:06,271 --> 00:01:08,438 I told him if he thinks that sounds bad, 12 00:01:09,730 --> 00:01:11,980 try being a girl in middle school. 13 00:01:12,063 --> 00:01:14,771 ["10 Things I Hate About You" by Leah Kate playing] 14 00:01:16,146 --> 00:01:17,646 [Stacy] Everyone has their own thing. 15 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:20,730 And we have ours. 16 00:01:27,063 --> 00:01:28,105 [song ends abruptly] 17 00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:30,730 -[dramatic music playing] -[in Hebrew] Va-y'chal Moshe… 18 00:01:30,813 --> 00:01:33,188 [Stacy, narrating] At a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, when you're 13, 19 00:01:33,271 --> 00:01:36,438 you step before friends, family, and elders of the temple 20 00:01:36,521 --> 00:01:37,855 and read from the Torah. 21 00:01:38,605 --> 00:01:41,021 Then, there's usually a party. 22 00:01:41,105 --> 00:01:43,605 All right, mishpachah, 23 00:01:43,688 --> 00:01:48,480 please say hello to our newest and most fabulous adult, 24 00:01:48,563 --> 00:01:52,563 Stacy Friedman! 25 00:01:52,646 --> 00:01:54,771 -[crowd cheering] -[house music playing] 26 00:01:54,855 --> 00:01:57,438 [Stacy, narrating] Your Bat Mitzvah is the first day of your adult life, 27 00:01:57,521 --> 00:02:01,688 and everyone knows an iconic adult life hinges on how it starts. 28 00:02:03,105 --> 00:02:06,313 ["I Love It" by Charli XCX playing] ♪ I don't care, I love it ♪ 29 00:02:06,396 --> 00:02:07,563 [Stacy, continuing] The theme. 30 00:02:08,146 --> 00:02:09,896 -The food. -[girl] Can I get one? 31 00:02:09,980 --> 00:02:11,438 [Stacy] The entrance video. 32 00:02:12,105 --> 00:02:13,646 It all tells a story. 33 00:02:14,146 --> 00:02:15,938 Who do I want to be? 34 00:02:16,021 --> 00:02:19,938 Will I have amazing lifelong friends like Lydia Rodriguez Katz? 35 00:02:21,063 --> 00:02:26,813 Nothing before that day matters because that was the old you, the kid you. 36 00:02:27,438 --> 00:02:28,896 Now you're an adult. 37 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,563 So who cares if two years ago you accidentally peed yourself 38 00:02:32,646 --> 00:02:35,480 during a field trip and had to get a secret dry pants delivery 39 00:02:35,563 --> 00:02:37,563 from your awesome older sister Ronnie? 40 00:02:38,146 --> 00:02:40,146 This is a hypothetical situation of course. 41 00:02:40,730 --> 00:02:41,646 ♪ I love it ♪ 42 00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:44,188 Go Stacy! That's my sister! 43 00:02:44,271 --> 00:02:46,396 [Stacy] And what better way to kick off adulthood 44 00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:48,605 than with the hottest guy in seventh grade? 45 00:02:48,688 --> 00:02:49,730 ♪ I love it ♪ 46 00:02:49,813 --> 00:02:52,146 ["Under Your Spell" by Desire playing] 47 00:02:55,855 --> 00:02:58,105 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 48 00:02:58,188 --> 00:03:00,396 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 49 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,438 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 50 00:03:02,521 --> 00:03:04,146 Andy, what are you doing? 51 00:03:04,771 --> 00:03:09,771 Stacy, I've loved you since the first time I saw you in the temple's Purim Pageant. 52 00:03:09,855 --> 00:03:13,271 You were the finest Queen Esther I ever laid eyes on. 53 00:03:13,355 --> 00:03:17,896 Is it okay if I officially signify me being your boyfriend by giving you a kiss? 54 00:03:19,021 --> 00:03:20,021 [camera shutter clicking] 55 00:03:21,730 --> 00:03:23,730 Consent given, Andy Goldfarb. 56 00:03:27,605 --> 00:03:29,355 -[knocking on door] -[Bree] Stacy! 57 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:31,313 [Stacy sighing] 58 00:03:31,396 --> 00:03:33,605 [Bree] Stacy, we're gonna be late. Let's go. 59 00:03:33,688 --> 00:03:35,688 [upbeat music playing] 60 00:03:38,146 --> 00:03:40,146 -[knocking on door] -[Bree] I know you can hear me. 61 00:03:40,230 --> 00:03:43,730 [sighing] One second, I'm flossing like you tell me to! 62 00:03:43,813 --> 00:03:46,355 -Now I'm gurgling. -Well, hurry up! 63 00:03:46,438 --> 00:03:48,563 -You too, Ronnie! -[Ronnie] I'm ready! 64 00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:51,063 You always say that. Never ready. 65 00:03:51,146 --> 00:03:53,813 -Ugh. Fine you got me. I'm not ready. -[Danny] Yankees are winning. 66 00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:55,855 [Bree] That's what you're wearing? 67 00:03:55,938 --> 00:03:58,480 Yeah, I don't even know who this kid is. I'm not gonna wear a suit. 68 00:03:58,563 --> 00:04:01,438 It's a junior high friend. We have to get to know those parents too. 69 00:04:01,521 --> 00:04:03,938 I don't want to get to know 'em. I liked when they were little. 70 00:04:04,021 --> 00:04:06,396 All we had to know was them and the trampoline park guy. 71 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:07,730 Ronnie, we're gonna be late! 72 00:04:07,813 --> 00:04:10,063 I'll be ready when Stacy's ready, Mom. It's all good. 73 00:04:11,230 --> 00:04:14,355 Hey, Andy, of course I'll share a matzo ball soup with you. 74 00:04:15,688 --> 00:04:16,771 [Stacy groaning] 75 00:04:18,313 --> 00:04:19,896 Hi, Andy. I like your yarmulke. 76 00:04:19,980 --> 00:04:22,438 I didn't know you were going to the Bat Mitzvah tonight, that's cool. 77 00:04:22,521 --> 00:04:24,063 Honey, what are you looking for? 78 00:04:24,146 --> 00:04:25,313 I can't find my earring. 79 00:04:25,396 --> 00:04:27,105 Oh, good luck. 80 00:04:27,188 --> 00:04:30,230 Keep looking, baby. Keep looking. Take your time. 81 00:04:30,313 --> 00:04:31,563 Stacy! 82 00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:33,188 Sorry, I'm coming! 83 00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:39,396 [exhaling sharply] 84 00:04:42,146 --> 00:04:43,146 [music fading] 85 00:04:44,230 --> 00:04:45,480 [Ronnie] Those are cool. 86 00:04:45,563 --> 00:04:48,521 -Mom will never let you wear them, though. -[Stacy] She won't even notice. 87 00:04:48,605 --> 00:04:50,896 And if she does, I'll put on a sad show for Dad. 88 00:04:50,980 --> 00:04:52,688 Oh, she'll notice. She'll hate them. 89 00:04:52,771 --> 00:04:56,313 And Dad will feel bad, but ultimately be too afraid to stand up to Mom. 90 00:04:56,396 --> 00:04:57,980 I've known them longer than you. 91 00:05:00,146 --> 00:05:03,605 Um, excuse me, what are those things on your feet? 92 00:05:03,688 --> 00:05:06,188 Lydia's mom bought us each a pair, so we could twin. 93 00:05:06,271 --> 00:05:07,563 What's twin? 94 00:05:07,646 --> 00:05:09,605 Wearing the same thing. It's very seventh grade. 95 00:05:09,688 --> 00:05:11,438 Take them off. You look like a stripper. 96 00:05:11,521 --> 00:05:14,188 -Mom, you can't say that. -Yeah, Mom. You're gonna get cancelled. 97 00:05:14,271 --> 00:05:15,230 Oh boy. 98 00:05:15,313 --> 00:05:17,563 Take them off or lose your phone. 99 00:05:17,646 --> 00:05:19,271 [objects clattering] 100 00:05:19,355 --> 00:05:20,771 [anticipatory music playing] 101 00:05:26,063 --> 00:05:26,896 Oh. 102 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:31,605 No, you can't. Just take them off. 103 00:05:31,688 --> 00:05:33,021 [Bree] Everyone in the car. 104 00:05:33,105 --> 00:05:35,688 Thirty seconds or there's going to be no food left at this thing. 105 00:05:35,771 --> 00:05:37,563 You're the one who's not ready. We're ready. 106 00:05:37,646 --> 00:05:40,855 -I don't know where my earring is. -Babe, did you look everywhere? Honestly? 107 00:05:40,938 --> 00:05:43,188 'Cause if you look hard enough, you can find it. 108 00:05:43,271 --> 00:05:44,730 Why would you do that to me? 109 00:05:44,813 --> 00:05:46,771 Because I knew the girls needed more time. 110 00:05:46,855 --> 00:05:48,980 I also… I don't want to go to this thing at all. 111 00:05:49,063 --> 00:05:50,896 -[Bree] You guys are the worst. -Yeah. I love you. Okay. 112 00:05:50,980 --> 00:05:52,438 Come on, Mom, just let her wear the shoes. 113 00:05:52,521 --> 00:05:54,730 It's not fair to Lydia to make her wear them by herself. 114 00:05:54,813 --> 00:05:57,813 Okay. You're going to hate them in two minutes. 115 00:05:58,563 --> 00:05:59,813 You're welcome. 116 00:05:59,896 --> 00:06:01,063 Thank you. Love you. 117 00:06:01,855 --> 00:06:03,063 [Stacy squealing] 118 00:06:03,688 --> 00:06:05,896 [Stacy muttering, groaning] 119 00:06:05,980 --> 00:06:07,813 [upbeat music playing] 120 00:06:07,896 --> 00:06:10,230 -Whoa. Ow! -[woman] Stacy! 121 00:06:10,313 --> 00:06:11,730 I'm coming! 122 00:06:12,855 --> 00:06:14,063 Ugh, fine. 123 00:06:18,646 --> 00:06:20,021 [man] Move, child! 124 00:06:20,105 --> 00:06:21,146 [Stacy] Coming, sorry! 125 00:06:21,230 --> 00:06:23,105 -[Bree] Oh yeah! -[Danny] Oh, nice job. 126 00:06:23,188 --> 00:06:25,521 [Bree] Taking after Dad with the dress clothes and sneakers. 127 00:06:25,605 --> 00:06:27,730 [Danny] Comfort always comes first, sweetie. 128 00:06:29,688 --> 00:06:32,771 -There she is! -[Bree] She's limping. Hi, sweetheart! 129 00:06:32,855 --> 00:06:35,938 -[Stacy] Hi, Lyd! -Lydia, Lydia encyclopedia. 130 00:06:36,021 --> 00:06:36,938 [Lydia] Hi, guys! 131 00:06:37,021 --> 00:06:38,563 Nice shoes. You look super cute, Lydia. 132 00:06:38,646 --> 00:06:41,063 Oh, thanks, Ron Ron. Stacy and I are twinning. 133 00:06:41,146 --> 00:06:42,063 We heard. 134 00:06:42,146 --> 00:06:43,730 Hmm. Not anymore. [chuckling] 135 00:06:44,396 --> 00:06:45,980 -You took yours off. -I got you. 136 00:06:46,063 --> 00:06:49,146 -Oh, thank you. I couldn't feel my feet. -Mom and Dad know we're taking you? 137 00:06:49,230 --> 00:06:52,438 Well, I told my mom, and then she told Dad's lawyer, so we're good to go. 138 00:06:52,521 --> 00:06:55,230 ["Rock and Roll, Hoochie Koo" by Rick Derringer playing] 139 00:06:55,313 --> 00:06:56,355 Nice! 140 00:06:57,313 --> 00:06:59,855 Ugh! Dad, can you turn this song off? It's embarrassing. 141 00:06:59,938 --> 00:07:02,105 Why is it embarrassing? No one's around to hear it. 142 00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:04,188 Oh my God! You're humiliating me! 143 00:07:04,271 --> 00:07:07,146 All right! I'll turn it off. Jesus. 144 00:07:07,855 --> 00:07:09,105 [Stacy crying] 145 00:07:09,188 --> 00:07:12,105 I turned it off, guys! What are we still upset about? 146 00:07:12,188 --> 00:07:15,063 Their watching sad videos to see who can cry first. 147 00:07:16,230 --> 00:07:19,730 You're trying to cry. That is so bizarre. 148 00:07:19,813 --> 00:07:21,813 [affectionate chatter on screen] 149 00:07:22,896 --> 00:07:25,813 Ugh! You're so freaking good at this game. I hate it. 150 00:07:25,896 --> 00:07:27,688 Everybody in this house needs a shrink. 151 00:07:27,771 --> 00:07:28,896 Yeah, you need two. 152 00:07:28,980 --> 00:07:29,813 Ten. 153 00:07:29,896 --> 00:07:31,813 [chuckling] That's nice. 154 00:07:31,896 --> 00:07:34,355 Everyone be normal. We're going to temple. 155 00:07:34,438 --> 00:07:35,563 Here's your music. 156 00:07:35,646 --> 00:07:38,230 ["Stupid Love" by Lady Gaga playing] 157 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:47,230 [DJ] Make some noise, mishpachah! 158 00:07:49,521 --> 00:07:51,355 Woohoo! 159 00:07:51,438 --> 00:07:53,605 It's Devin's B'nai Mitzvah! 160 00:07:53,688 --> 00:07:57,771 They're becoming an adult. Let's hear it for Devin! 161 00:07:57,855 --> 00:08:00,605 We've been pushing all the teachers to assign more homework. 162 00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:03,730 If we want to prepare our kids for this world, we gotta start 'em early. 163 00:08:03,813 --> 00:08:05,521 India's been kicking our ass. 164 00:08:05,605 --> 00:08:07,730 -I'm always telling my son, Marvin-- -[Danny] I'm sorry. 165 00:08:07,813 --> 00:08:10,896 Can I interrupt you for one second? I think this is on behalf of the table. 166 00:08:10,980 --> 00:08:14,688 We came here to enjoy chicken and fish tonight 167 00:08:14,771 --> 00:08:17,563 and maybe have a few drinks, so could you stop talking? 168 00:08:18,063 --> 00:08:20,063 ♪ I want your stupid love ♪ 169 00:08:20,146 --> 00:08:20,980 [Danny] Thank you. 170 00:08:21,855 --> 00:08:22,771 Wow! 171 00:08:25,813 --> 00:08:27,813 [creepy music playing] 172 00:08:28,355 --> 00:08:31,521 This is such a classic. Have you watched Leprechaun in the Hood? 173 00:08:31,605 --> 00:08:33,021 Dude, that's a masterpiece. 174 00:08:33,105 --> 00:08:37,146 We know. We've seen it. It was awful. Can you just let us watch our movie? 175 00:08:37,230 --> 00:08:38,396 Bye! 176 00:08:39,063 --> 00:08:40,021 That hurt. 177 00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:43,480 -We've seen that? -No. 178 00:08:43,563 --> 00:08:44,730 [both chuckling] 179 00:08:44,813 --> 00:08:46,521 Okay, I love this Carnivale theme, 180 00:08:46,605 --> 00:08:49,063 but your Candyland theme is gonna be the best of the year. 181 00:08:49,146 --> 00:08:52,730 Oh, until your New York theme puts the entire school to shame! 182 00:08:52,813 --> 00:08:54,271 If my parents let me have it. 183 00:08:54,355 --> 00:08:56,230 Did your dad talk to DJ Schmuley yet? 184 00:08:56,313 --> 00:08:59,730 Let me hear you scream, "DJ Schmuley is my king!" 185 00:08:59,813 --> 00:09:01,980 [crowd] DJ Schmuley is my king! 186 00:09:02,730 --> 00:09:04,938 -He's already been booked. We got it! -Sweet! 187 00:09:05,021 --> 00:09:06,688 ["Preach" by Saint Motel playing over speakers] 188 00:09:06,771 --> 00:09:08,563 Looking nice, ladies! 189 00:09:08,646 --> 00:09:09,813 -[Lydia] Hi, guys. -Hi. 190 00:09:09,896 --> 00:09:11,730 Can you believe we're becoming adults this year? 191 00:09:11,813 --> 00:09:12,688 -No. -[Nikki] Yeah. 192 00:09:12,771 --> 00:09:15,146 My mom actually let me shave my legs this afternoon. 193 00:09:15,230 --> 00:09:17,438 First time. So magical. 194 00:09:17,521 --> 00:09:18,938 Oh, I'm so proud of you, Nikki! 195 00:09:19,021 --> 00:09:22,021 It burns so bad right now, like somebody wiped wasabi all over my shins. 196 00:09:22,105 --> 00:09:23,355 Oh. 197 00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:24,730 Oh my God. 198 00:09:24,813 --> 00:09:27,563 [Tara] Why do Kym, Anya, and Megan always look so cool? 199 00:09:27,646 --> 00:09:29,188 Are those birds rescued? 200 00:09:29,271 --> 00:09:31,105 -Say what? -They better be. 201 00:09:31,188 --> 00:09:33,396 -They scare me. -Yeah, you know what else is scary? 202 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:37,063 Nikki's mom is allowing Ronnie and Zaara to drink alcohol! 203 00:09:37,146 --> 00:09:39,480 One, two, three. Woo! 204 00:09:41,230 --> 00:09:43,063 [exclaiming] 205 00:09:43,146 --> 00:09:44,813 -Okay, let me hide those. -[Ronnie coughing] 206 00:09:44,896 --> 00:09:47,313 Yeah, she's trying to be like a cool mom. It's really weird. 207 00:09:47,396 --> 00:09:48,646 [Andy] Let's go! 208 00:09:50,188 --> 00:09:53,563 Oh my God, Andy Goldfarb looks so cute tonight. 209 00:09:55,771 --> 00:09:56,813 ♪ Let's go ♪ 210 00:09:59,438 --> 00:10:02,146 Do you realize that one day he will be mine, 211 00:10:02,230 --> 00:10:03,938 and you will have a cool boyfriend too, 212 00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:07,438 and then we'll have a joint wedding and move to adjoining lofts in Tribeca? 213 00:10:07,521 --> 00:10:09,146 In Taylor Swift's building? 214 00:10:09,230 --> 00:10:10,480 -Yeah! -Yeah! 215 00:10:10,563 --> 00:10:11,521 [giggling] 216 00:10:11,605 --> 00:10:12,480 I'm gonna talk to him. 217 00:10:12,563 --> 00:10:13,855 -[Lydia] What? -[Stacy] I'm ready. 218 00:10:13,938 --> 00:10:16,355 You should, Stace. Yeah, you got this. 219 00:10:16,438 --> 00:10:17,396 Come with me, please. 220 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:18,355 -Yeah. -Let's go. 221 00:10:18,438 --> 00:10:20,188 Go, go, go. You got this. 222 00:10:20,271 --> 00:10:21,438 Gang way! 223 00:10:21,521 --> 00:10:23,105 Hey, wait for me! 224 00:10:23,188 --> 00:10:25,188 -No! You're embarrassing me. -Yes! 225 00:10:25,938 --> 00:10:27,855 ["Under Your Spell" by Desire playing] 226 00:10:28,855 --> 00:10:32,313 ♪ I don't eat, I don't sleep ♪ 227 00:10:32,396 --> 00:10:36,938 ♪ I do nothing but think of you ♪ 228 00:10:38,146 --> 00:10:40,146 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 229 00:10:40,230 --> 00:10:41,605 ♪ You keep me under your… ♪ 230 00:10:41,688 --> 00:10:42,688 [Mateo] Hey, Stacy. 231 00:10:42,771 --> 00:10:43,646 [song stops] 232 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:45,563 I like your kicks. 233 00:10:49,688 --> 00:10:51,021 Andy, smile! 234 00:10:52,938 --> 00:10:54,063 [girl] Finish him! 235 00:11:01,146 --> 00:11:04,563 Why would Mateo do that? That was so uncalled for. 236 00:11:04,646 --> 00:11:05,563 Oh, sorry. 237 00:11:05,646 --> 00:11:06,896 Completely. Sorry. 238 00:11:06,980 --> 00:11:09,521 Why does Andy hang out with that Italian exchange student anyway? 239 00:11:09,605 --> 00:11:10,855 I think he's Ecuadorian. 240 00:11:10,938 --> 00:11:13,563 Whatever. I heard he has a girlfriend back home. She's in college. 241 00:11:13,646 --> 00:11:15,646 Um, no. I think that's, like, illegal. 242 00:11:15,730 --> 00:11:17,730 -[It roaring] -[Zaara screaming] 243 00:11:17,813 --> 00:11:19,271 -Oh my God! -[crowd gasping] 244 00:11:20,396 --> 00:11:22,105 -[Zaara] Sorry. -What's wrong with you? 245 00:11:22,188 --> 00:11:24,480 -Why would you do that? So embarrassing. -I'm sorry. 246 00:11:24,563 --> 00:11:27,646 All right, everybody, make some noise! 247 00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:32,521 ♪ If you don't wanna see me Dancing with somebody ♪ 248 00:11:32,605 --> 00:11:34,563 ["Don't Start Now" by Dua Lipa playing] 249 00:11:35,521 --> 00:11:37,480 ♪ If you wanna believe… ♪ 250 00:11:37,563 --> 00:11:40,438 Come on, let's dance, everybody! Come on! 251 00:11:42,063 --> 00:11:45,313 ♪ Don't show up, don't come out ♪ 252 00:11:46,021 --> 00:11:49,105 ♪ Don't start caring about me now ♪ 253 00:11:51,688 --> 00:11:54,438 -[Schmuley] Let me hear you scream, Schmu… -[crowd] Ley! 254 00:11:54,521 --> 00:11:55,771 -Schmu-- -[crowd] Ley! 255 00:11:55,855 --> 00:11:57,021 -Schmu, Schmu-- -[crowd] Ley! 256 00:11:57,105 --> 00:11:59,188 Why does everybody like this idiot? 257 00:11:59,271 --> 00:12:00,855 -He's the best! -The best. 258 00:12:00,938 --> 00:12:05,271 -You've been officially Schmulitized! -[crowd cheering] 259 00:12:05,355 --> 00:12:06,688 [music fades] 260 00:12:06,771 --> 00:12:08,563 [Stacy] Thank you family for joining us today. 261 00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:12,605 Let me take you all on a journey. 262 00:12:12,688 --> 00:12:15,605 Picture this. My entrance video starts… 263 00:12:16,438 --> 00:12:19,230 Which, as we know, sets the tone for the entire Bat Mitzvah. 264 00:12:19,313 --> 00:12:21,188 -[Stacy] Mm-hmm. -[man shouting] 265 00:12:21,271 --> 00:12:23,188 -[Stacy] Ugh, Ronnie! -Girls, come on. 266 00:12:23,271 --> 00:12:27,480 Anyway, I descend the stairs of a private yacht on the Hudson River 267 00:12:27,563 --> 00:12:29,521 to cheers and fireworks. 268 00:12:29,605 --> 00:12:30,771 Whoa. 269 00:12:30,855 --> 00:12:33,271 Then! Oh, who's that zipping by on a jet ski? 270 00:12:33,855 --> 00:12:36,896 Why that's international recording artist Olivia Rodrigo. 271 00:12:36,980 --> 00:12:38,896 Wait, how we gonna pay for this? 272 00:12:38,980 --> 00:12:39,813 Oh, we have ideas. 273 00:12:39,896 --> 00:12:41,355 They… they got ideas, honey. 274 00:12:41,438 --> 00:12:42,563 [Lydia] Okay. 275 00:12:43,688 --> 00:12:46,646 No. Wait. No. The old guy was supposed to be for your dad. 276 00:12:46,730 --> 00:12:47,938 Oh no. Just keep going. 277 00:12:48,021 --> 00:12:49,021 [girls muttering] 278 00:12:49,813 --> 00:12:50,646 -There. -Okay. 279 00:12:50,730 --> 00:12:52,771 Oh, this is amazing. 280 00:12:52,855 --> 00:12:54,563 -Shut up, Ronnie. -No, you shut up. 281 00:12:54,646 --> 00:12:55,688 I'll kill you, Ronnie. 282 00:12:55,771 --> 00:12:57,480 Not if I stab you first! 283 00:12:57,563 --> 00:12:58,771 Oh, that's… that's nice. 284 00:12:58,855 --> 00:13:02,438 Oh my God, this is important! I'm becoming a freaking woman, everyone! 285 00:13:02,521 --> 00:13:05,855 Okay, woman. All you should worry about right now is your mitzvah project 286 00:13:05,938 --> 00:13:07,355 and practicing your Haftarah. 287 00:13:07,438 --> 00:13:09,271 -[Bree] Mm-hmm. -That's not important! 288 00:13:11,021 --> 00:13:14,730 I mean, it is important to you and other old people and God and stuff. 289 00:13:14,813 --> 00:13:17,396 But to me, the party is important. 290 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,521 If this doesn't go well, I could end up like Kate Kossman. 291 00:13:20,605 --> 00:13:22,313 You are not gonna end up like Kate Kossman. 292 00:13:22,396 --> 00:13:23,688 Who's Kate Kossman? 293 00:13:23,771 --> 00:13:27,396 Oh, she had this terrible medieval themed Bat Mitzvah called Kate Kossman Knights, 294 00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:29,730 not realizing the initials spelled out KKK. 295 00:13:29,813 --> 00:13:31,771 Yeah, no, I could see that being a problem. Okay. 296 00:13:31,855 --> 00:13:34,855 So now, she just sits alone in the cafeteria sewing friendship bracelets 297 00:13:34,938 --> 00:13:38,355 for literally no one because she has no friends. 298 00:13:38,438 --> 00:13:39,730 That sounds a little dramatic. 299 00:13:39,813 --> 00:13:43,396 Oh, so you think you shouldn't be punished for promoting the KKK. 300 00:13:43,480 --> 00:13:45,855 Wow, Mom, didn't realize you supported racism. 301 00:13:45,938 --> 00:13:46,855 Oh boy. 302 00:13:46,938 --> 00:13:47,938 [Stacy] Hear me out. 303 00:13:48,021 --> 00:13:51,021 You're always saying how my Bat Mitzvah determines the rest of my life. 304 00:13:51,105 --> 00:13:53,146 And I think Dua Lipa would make my life perfect. 305 00:13:53,230 --> 00:13:56,730 No. No famous pop stars, no yachts, no sailboats even. 306 00:13:56,813 --> 00:13:59,355 That's so unfair! Ronnie got a baked potato bar at hers! 307 00:13:59,438 --> 00:14:02,771 Listen, when I got Bar Mitzvahed, we had a party in Grandma's basement. 308 00:14:02,855 --> 00:14:04,855 We all split, like, this giant matzo ball. 309 00:14:04,938 --> 00:14:05,771 That was the fun. 310 00:14:05,855 --> 00:14:08,063 You know what the theme was? Being Jewish. 311 00:14:08,146 --> 00:14:10,855 Just practice your prayers and write your speech already. 312 00:14:10,938 --> 00:14:13,271 Oh, I've been doing that Mr. Friedman. It's all covered. 313 00:14:13,355 --> 00:14:15,521 You're writing Stacy's speech? 314 00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:18,146 -You know I'm not good at writing. -English is her worst subject. 315 00:14:18,230 --> 00:14:19,396 It's really bad. 316 00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:21,521 -Stacy, that is so not okay. -[Lydia] It's fine. 317 00:14:21,605 --> 00:14:24,688 She's gonna do my entrance video. I know she'll crush it. Don't worry. 318 00:14:25,855 --> 00:14:28,021 Can I at least have a virgin mojito bar? 319 00:14:28,105 --> 00:14:29,563 You can have a ball pit. 320 00:14:29,646 --> 00:14:31,271 Oh my God, Dad. That's for kids! 321 00:14:31,355 --> 00:14:33,480 I've had my period for seven months now! 322 00:14:33,563 --> 00:14:35,188 [chuckling] Wait, Stacy. 323 00:14:35,271 --> 00:14:37,021 That's a long period, sweetheart! 324 00:14:38,938 --> 00:14:40,480 You know what? I'm gonna head out. 325 00:14:40,563 --> 00:14:41,605 I'll drive you. 326 00:14:41,688 --> 00:14:43,271 [Lydia] Love you. See you in the morning. 327 00:14:43,355 --> 00:14:45,063 Don't worry, Dad. It'll be okay. 328 00:14:45,563 --> 00:14:47,605 She's growing up so fast. It's crazy. 329 00:14:47,688 --> 00:14:48,896 [Ronnie] I'm drinking now. 330 00:14:48,980 --> 00:14:51,730 I tried it the other day. I didn't like it. We're good. 331 00:14:54,063 --> 00:14:55,021 [door closing] 332 00:14:55,105 --> 00:14:57,438 [Stacy, in Hebrew] Va-y'chal Mosh-- 333 00:14:57,521 --> 00:15:00,063 -[Stacy sighs frustratedly] -[recording, in Hebrew] Va-y'chal… 334 00:15:00,146 --> 00:15:01,605 [Stacy, narrating] Dear God, what's up? 335 00:15:01,688 --> 00:15:04,521 Stacy Friedman here, but I guess you already know that. 336 00:15:05,021 --> 00:15:07,521 And I guess you already know what I'm going to say. 337 00:15:08,105 --> 00:15:11,480 But just to be super safe, I'm going to say it anyway. 338 00:15:11,980 --> 00:15:16,063 I would really, really appreciate it if I could have an amazing Bat Mitzvah. 339 00:15:16,146 --> 00:15:17,480 [contemplative music playing] 340 00:15:17,563 --> 00:15:19,771 And I know I need to do my mitzvah project. 341 00:15:19,855 --> 00:15:24,271 But isn't a mitzvah project supposed to be giving back in a way that represents me? 342 00:15:24,355 --> 00:15:26,230 Which is why I don't know what to do. 343 00:15:26,938 --> 00:15:28,313 I mean, I'm not popular. 344 00:15:28,396 --> 00:15:29,855 I'm not a loser. 345 00:15:31,438 --> 00:15:33,396 I don't know who I am. 346 00:15:34,355 --> 00:15:37,396 But I do know, if I have a kick-ass Bat Mitzvah, 347 00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:41,396 doors would open, and I can have a fab life on my own terms. 348 00:15:41,480 --> 00:15:43,230 [woman] No. No famous pop stars. 349 00:15:43,313 --> 00:15:44,563 [man] You can have a ball pit. 350 00:15:44,646 --> 00:15:47,521 [Stacy] A ball pit? Lydia's gonna get everything she asked for. 351 00:15:47,605 --> 00:15:49,521 Even a Twizzlers station for me. 352 00:15:50,063 --> 00:15:52,230 I'm starting to worry Mom and Dad don't get it, 353 00:15:52,313 --> 00:15:54,271 and the whole thing's gonna suck. 354 00:15:55,063 --> 00:15:55,896 [music fades] 355 00:15:59,313 --> 00:16:00,396 [Stacy whimpering] 356 00:16:00,896 --> 00:16:04,230 -[Stacy] You had her phone the whole time? -[Lydia] No, she was lying. 357 00:16:04,313 --> 00:16:05,730 -The audacity. -The monster. 358 00:16:05,813 --> 00:16:06,980 Yeah. 359 00:16:07,063 --> 00:16:08,896 -Can we sit outside? It's a nice day. -No. 360 00:16:08,980 --> 00:16:10,646 I mean, I definitely could use some color. 361 00:16:10,730 --> 00:16:13,146 -Yeah, it's true. -Is that Tory Burch? 362 00:16:13,230 --> 00:16:17,355 Oh no, it's Walmart. I got this and a water bottle for only $12. 363 00:16:17,438 --> 00:16:18,688 I was talking to her. 364 00:16:19,230 --> 00:16:20,063 [shushing] 365 00:16:21,396 --> 00:16:22,730 M-me? 366 00:16:22,813 --> 00:16:23,855 Your skirt. 367 00:16:23,938 --> 00:16:26,188 Uh, yeah, it is Tory Burch. 368 00:16:26,271 --> 00:16:29,855 My mom is trying to spend all my dad's money before the next court date. 369 00:16:30,938 --> 00:16:33,563 I'm pretty sure I saw Hailey Bieber wearing the exact same one. 370 00:16:33,646 --> 00:16:36,105 [softly] Oh cool. Okay. Bye. 371 00:16:36,188 --> 00:16:38,188 [indistinct chatter] 372 00:16:38,730 --> 00:16:39,896 That was weird. 373 00:16:39,980 --> 00:16:42,896 -I love and hate them at the same time. -[sighing] Yeah. 374 00:16:42,980 --> 00:16:44,438 What just happened? 375 00:16:44,521 --> 00:16:46,480 ["Wait A Minute!" by WILLOW playing] 376 00:16:54,063 --> 00:16:55,563 ♪ Wait a minute ♪ 377 00:16:56,063 --> 00:17:00,396 ♪ I think I left my conscience On your front-door step ♪ 378 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:03,605 ♪ Whoa ♪ 379 00:17:03,688 --> 00:17:06,063 -[song stops] -[pop music playing on phone] 380 00:17:06,146 --> 00:17:09,355 So get this. I heard Megan's doing her mitzvah project next weekend. 381 00:17:09,438 --> 00:17:11,021 She's passing out sunscreen at Coachella. 382 00:17:11,105 --> 00:17:12,980 -What? Wow. -[Stacy] So cool. 383 00:17:13,063 --> 00:17:14,855 Guys, I have to come up with something amazing. 384 00:17:14,938 --> 00:17:16,188 This is so much pressure. 385 00:17:16,271 --> 00:17:19,688 How long do you think it takes to become a social activist influencer on TikTok? 386 00:17:19,771 --> 00:17:21,188 Uh, six months? 387 00:17:21,271 --> 00:17:22,563 Too long. [sighing] 388 00:17:23,230 --> 00:17:25,521 You know what? We just need to chill our brains. 389 00:17:25,605 --> 00:17:28,021 What are you doing Saturday? My mom's out of town this weekend. 390 00:17:28,105 --> 00:17:29,355 Why? You gonna throw a party? 391 00:17:29,438 --> 00:17:30,396 A dork party? 392 00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:31,646 [all chuckling] 393 00:17:32,605 --> 00:17:33,563 What if I did? 394 00:17:34,063 --> 00:17:36,230 Well, I mean, my dad's out of town. 395 00:17:36,313 --> 00:17:38,271 Now, you could actually throw a party. 396 00:17:38,355 --> 00:17:41,271 You could invite the whole seventh grade and not exclude anybody. 397 00:17:41,355 --> 00:17:45,605 Oh, come on. Wouldn't it be fun to exclude people instead of being excluded for once? 398 00:17:45,688 --> 00:17:47,771 ["Wait A Minute!" by WILLOW playing] 399 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:00,521 [Andy] Heads up! 400 00:18:00,605 --> 00:18:01,980 -[Stacy grunting] -[all gasping] 401 00:18:02,063 --> 00:18:03,480 [Lydia] Ay dios mío. 402 00:18:03,980 --> 00:18:06,271 Stace, Stace, Stace, Stace? Are you okay? 403 00:18:06,355 --> 00:18:08,063 -[kids gasping] -Oh shit. 404 00:18:08,146 --> 00:18:09,521 That doesn't look good. 405 00:18:09,605 --> 00:18:10,896 You have grass in your hair. 406 00:18:10,980 --> 00:18:12,146 [Mateo] Stacy. 407 00:18:12,230 --> 00:18:13,396 Are you okay? 408 00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:14,730 [Andy] That's my bad! 409 00:18:14,813 --> 00:18:16,855 [dreamy music playing] 410 00:18:16,938 --> 00:18:17,896 You good? 411 00:18:22,521 --> 00:18:23,688 Yeah. Sorry about that. 412 00:18:28,980 --> 00:18:30,563 -Have some water. -[music stops] 413 00:18:32,646 --> 00:18:34,021 Oh my God. That was perfect. 414 00:18:34,105 --> 00:18:35,355 He went… And then you went. 415 00:18:35,438 --> 00:18:37,688 -You guys are meant to be. -[Stacy chuckling] 416 00:18:37,771 --> 00:18:39,605 Hey, are your legs okay, Nikki? 417 00:18:40,855 --> 00:18:42,563 They're fine, Mateo. Just relax. 418 00:18:42,646 --> 00:18:44,646 ["Tongue Tied" by Grouplove playing] 419 00:18:46,355 --> 00:18:48,355 [kids clamoring] 420 00:18:48,438 --> 00:18:50,438 [indistinct chatter] 421 00:18:52,605 --> 00:18:53,438 [Lydia] Really? 422 00:18:53,521 --> 00:18:57,230 Oh, by the way, Dad invited the dry cleaner to the Bat Mitzvah, Stacy. 423 00:18:57,313 --> 00:18:58,938 What? No, that's so unfair. 424 00:18:59,021 --> 00:19:02,438 The ratio to old people to normal people is already so unbalanced. 425 00:19:02,521 --> 00:19:05,021 Why is that kid Mateo going to Hebrew school? 426 00:19:05,938 --> 00:19:09,313 Maybe he wanted to convert and take some Jewish holidays off? 427 00:19:09,396 --> 00:19:10,730 [all chuckling] 428 00:19:10,813 --> 00:19:12,230 [Lydia] You gonna invite him, Stace? 429 00:19:12,313 --> 00:19:13,771 Mateo? No, I barely know him. 430 00:19:13,855 --> 00:19:16,146 You know, if you invite Mateo, Andy might come. 431 00:19:16,230 --> 00:19:19,063 [electronic music playing over radio] 432 00:19:19,146 --> 00:19:20,980 [vocalizing] 433 00:19:21,063 --> 00:19:22,605 Have fun learning! 434 00:19:22,688 --> 00:19:24,313 Love you! 435 00:19:24,396 --> 00:19:26,396 ["Tongue Tied" by Grouplove playing] 436 00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:27,730 Oh shit! 437 00:19:29,021 --> 00:19:30,146 [Schmuley yelling] 438 00:19:30,230 --> 00:19:31,355 Are you on dru-- 439 00:19:31,438 --> 00:19:33,438 [both] Take me to your best friend's house 440 00:19:33,521 --> 00:19:37,771 Goin' round this roundabout, oh yeah 441 00:19:39,313 --> 00:19:41,396 -[boy] Thank you. -[Lydia] Good job, guys. 442 00:19:41,980 --> 00:19:43,105 -Manishmah. -Hi. 443 00:19:43,188 --> 00:19:44,688 -Shalom, you two. -Shalom. 444 00:19:44,771 --> 00:19:47,521 [Lydia] Oh, this looks really good. I am not that creative… 445 00:19:47,605 --> 00:19:49,563 I was not good at arts and crafts, like, at all. 446 00:19:49,646 --> 00:19:51,355 -I like your outfit, Ashley. -Thank you. 447 00:19:51,438 --> 00:19:52,646 Oh yeah, it's really cute. 448 00:19:52,730 --> 00:19:54,855 [girl] Look who's coming out of the make out closet. 449 00:19:54,938 --> 00:19:56,480 [Stacy] Oh my God, were they hooking up in there? 450 00:19:56,563 --> 00:19:59,688 How do they not get caught? There's literally so many people around. 451 00:20:00,521 --> 00:20:05,188 Would you believe when I was your age, I was in a Jewish rock and roll band? 452 00:20:05,271 --> 00:20:10,146 We called ourselves Exodus because Genesis was already taken. 453 00:20:10,980 --> 00:20:12,355 I'm sorry, Aaron, am I boring you? 454 00:20:12,438 --> 00:20:14,771 [Aaron] What? No-- I was listening, Cantor Jerry. 455 00:20:14,855 --> 00:20:15,896 [Nikki] Stace, Lyd! 456 00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:17,021 [upbeat music playing] 457 00:20:17,105 --> 00:20:19,313 -You look so cute. You guys good? -[Nikki] Yes. 458 00:20:19,396 --> 00:20:21,063 -The pole! -Pole! 459 00:20:21,855 --> 00:20:23,605 Oh, wait, how's your Torah portion going? 460 00:20:23,688 --> 00:20:25,396 It's like 6,000 pages long. 461 00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:28,063 Why did my parents pick the third week of August? 462 00:20:28,146 --> 00:20:31,771 But mine's literally, like, a minute and a half long. Thank you, June 10th! 463 00:20:32,396 --> 00:20:35,105 Chop-chop, ladies! Curtain's up in five! 464 00:20:35,188 --> 00:20:39,021 I like to think of Hebrew school as a little performance I give. 465 00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:42,771 Your prayer book is the playbill, and I'm the star, cutie-pops. 466 00:20:42,855 --> 00:20:43,688 [girls giggling] 467 00:20:43,771 --> 00:20:46,813 Giving you a bit of the ole razzle-dazzle. You know what I'm saying? 468 00:20:46,896 --> 00:20:48,730 Kidding. Come one, class is starting. Let's go! 469 00:20:48,813 --> 00:20:49,896 [girl 2] Rabbi Rebecca! 470 00:20:49,980 --> 00:20:52,188 -Can we please have snacks? -You want some latkes and gefilte fish? 471 00:20:52,271 --> 00:20:53,188 She's insane. 472 00:20:53,271 --> 00:20:54,646 I know. I love her. [giggling] 473 00:20:54,730 --> 00:20:56,980 "And I'm the star, cutie-pops, razzle-dazzle." 474 00:20:57,063 --> 00:20:58,396 -Very nice. -Very good. 475 00:20:58,480 --> 00:20:59,813 Thank you. Thank you very much. 476 00:20:59,896 --> 00:21:00,938 [indistinct chatter] 477 00:21:01,021 --> 00:21:03,230 -Is she serious? Oh my God. -I know, right? 478 00:21:03,313 --> 00:21:06,063 I really want a cloud. Like, I want to taste a cloud. 479 00:21:06,146 --> 00:21:08,438 -You want what? -I want to taste a cloud. 480 00:21:08,521 --> 00:21:09,938 I want to taste a cloud. That's all. 481 00:21:10,021 --> 00:21:11,896 -[Lydia] It seems-- -[Andy] Yo. You good, bro? 482 00:21:15,438 --> 00:21:16,980 Yeah. Why? 483 00:21:17,063 --> 00:21:19,146 Uh, your head from earlier. 484 00:21:19,230 --> 00:21:20,521 Head injuries are no joke. 485 00:21:20,605 --> 00:21:23,271 One time I barfed at soccer from a concussion. 486 00:21:24,605 --> 00:21:25,438 Did you barf? 487 00:21:26,063 --> 00:21:27,896 No. I didn't. 488 00:21:28,396 --> 00:21:29,313 Tight. 489 00:21:33,855 --> 00:21:36,480 -All right, shabbat shalom! -[class] Shabbat shalom. 490 00:21:36,563 --> 00:21:39,771 [Rebecca] How's everyone feeling? We having the time of our lives right now? 491 00:21:39,855 --> 00:21:41,771 You guys start your mitzvah projects yet? 492 00:21:41,855 --> 00:21:43,646 -[class] No. -Yeah. 493 00:21:43,730 --> 00:21:47,730 No? It's the most important part of this whole thing. 494 00:21:47,813 --> 00:21:53,063 It's when you do something menschie for your community, for society at-large. 495 00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:56,146 What? You guys don't care about society at-large? 496 00:21:56,230 --> 00:21:58,021 -[class] No. -Yeah. 497 00:21:58,105 --> 00:22:02,688 All right, how about we pick up where we left off with our old buddy, David. 498 00:22:02,771 --> 00:22:03,813 Remember him? 499 00:22:03,896 --> 00:22:08,646 Homeboy was about to get his groove on with the foxy Bathsheba 500 00:22:08,730 --> 00:22:11,063 even though she was married to someone else. 501 00:22:11,146 --> 00:22:13,605 [scoffing] What a snake David is! 502 00:22:13,688 --> 00:22:14,771 You a snake, Aaron? 503 00:22:16,146 --> 00:22:17,063 N-no. 504 00:22:17,146 --> 00:22:19,271 You ever pull something like that? Cheat on your wife? 505 00:22:21,646 --> 00:22:25,730 -M-me? -Dude, I'm messing around with you. Relax! 506 00:22:25,813 --> 00:22:27,938 You're sweating, my goodness. 507 00:22:28,021 --> 00:22:29,938 You're not a snake, Aaron. You're awesome. 508 00:22:30,021 --> 00:22:32,021 Look at that arm hair and mustache coming in strong. 509 00:22:32,105 --> 00:22:34,021 Baruch HaShem, Aaron. Let's go. 510 00:22:34,105 --> 00:22:35,771 [class giggling] 511 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,521 ["Monte Carlo" by Remi Wolf playing] 512 00:22:40,438 --> 00:22:42,771 [Gabi] So I told the sales lady, "I'll take one in each color." 513 00:22:42,855 --> 00:22:45,730 And she said, "Are you getting a divorce?" And I said, "How'd you guess?" 514 00:22:48,313 --> 00:22:49,480 That's really funny, Mom. 515 00:22:49,563 --> 00:22:52,771 Hey, can you let me bring over some people on Saturday? 516 00:22:52,855 --> 00:22:53,980 Oh sure. Like a playdate? 517 00:22:54,063 --> 00:22:57,938 A playdate? Mom, I'm 13. Please don't call it a playdate. 518 00:22:58,021 --> 00:22:58,855 [cell phone ringing] 519 00:22:58,938 --> 00:23:00,980 My dad's calling me. Hi! 520 00:23:01,063 --> 00:23:03,480 Hey! Stacels. Hey, I'm at the store right now. 521 00:23:03,563 --> 00:23:05,855 Mommy told me you need some, uh, tampons… 522 00:23:05,938 --> 00:23:08,188 -But I'm not sure what size you use-- -Stop. Get whatever. 523 00:23:08,271 --> 00:23:10,063 [Danny] There's a lot of whatever to choose from. 524 00:23:10,146 --> 00:23:11,438 Do pads. I don't care. 525 00:23:11,521 --> 00:23:12,980 What kind of flow do you got going? 526 00:23:13,063 --> 00:23:14,771 -Uh, heavy flow situation? -Heavy. 527 00:23:14,855 --> 00:23:16,813 -Oh my God. -A light flow? Or extra chunky? 528 00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:19,605 I… I… I got confused. I'm getting peanut butter also. 529 00:23:19,688 --> 00:23:22,771 -[Stacy] I mean-- -Mommy said it was a high-alert situation? 530 00:23:22,855 --> 00:23:24,563 That you might have to sleep in the bathtub? 531 00:23:24,646 --> 00:23:26,396 I'll drop 'em off in your room immediately. 532 00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:27,896 Oh my God. Love you. Bye. 533 00:23:31,688 --> 00:23:34,646 "Hey, Lyd, it's Kym. Having people over now." 534 00:23:34,730 --> 00:23:36,105 "Pull up if you're free." 535 00:23:36,605 --> 00:23:37,438 Wow. 536 00:23:39,355 --> 00:23:41,021 Um, what do I say? 537 00:23:41,105 --> 00:23:42,355 Do you want to go? 538 00:23:44,230 --> 00:23:45,105 No. 539 00:23:46,855 --> 00:23:49,521 But, I mean, I should respond. 540 00:23:49,605 --> 00:23:52,605 Yeah. For sure. Uh, if you want to go, I don't care. 541 00:23:52,688 --> 00:23:55,521 I just think they're awful, but it's your choice. 542 00:23:56,688 --> 00:23:58,855 -Let me ask if you can come. -No. Please don't do that. 543 00:23:58,938 --> 00:24:02,396 Yeah, I'm gonna ask. Doing it right now. Look, I just did it. Whoops. Sorry. 544 00:24:08,063 --> 00:24:09,230 [both screaming] 545 00:24:09,313 --> 00:24:13,188 Oh my God! Okay, Mom, can you drop us off at Kym Chang-Cohen's house, please? 546 00:24:13,271 --> 00:24:15,813 -Wait. Can you stop by my place first? -[Gabi] Sure. 547 00:24:15,896 --> 00:24:18,771 -[mouthing] Period. -You gonna ask if Tara and Nikki can come? 548 00:24:18,855 --> 00:24:19,855 [Lydia] Oh. 549 00:24:20,355 --> 00:24:23,563 Oh. Um, I mean, I don't think so. 550 00:24:23,646 --> 00:24:25,480 Bringing three people would be, like, a lot. 551 00:24:25,563 --> 00:24:26,938 -Yeah, I agree. -Yeah. 552 00:24:27,563 --> 00:24:28,563 [Lydia squealing] 553 00:24:28,646 --> 00:24:29,896 [both vocalizing] 554 00:24:29,980 --> 00:24:32,688 -[both laughing] -You can't go now. 555 00:24:32,771 --> 00:24:34,188 [upbeat music playing] 556 00:24:36,938 --> 00:24:38,605 Okay. Hurry. 557 00:24:38,688 --> 00:24:39,813 -Hi, Ron. -[Ronnie] Hi. 558 00:24:39,896 --> 00:24:42,271 -Should I wear a jacket with this? -No. Where are you going? 559 00:24:42,355 --> 00:24:43,688 Kym Chang-Cohen's. 560 00:24:43,771 --> 00:24:46,813 Oh wow. First rule of going to a cool kid's house, don't disagree. 561 00:24:46,896 --> 00:24:47,771 Don't get too excited. 562 00:24:47,855 --> 00:24:48,855 -Got it. Thanks. -Cool. 563 00:24:48,938 --> 00:24:50,480 [Ronnie] Oh, Dad left pads on your bed. 564 00:24:50,563 --> 00:24:52,980 They're enormous. I almost thought they were pillows. 565 00:24:53,063 --> 00:24:53,980 Are you joking? 566 00:24:54,063 --> 00:24:55,855 [Lydia laughing] That's funny. 567 00:24:55,938 --> 00:24:58,980 ["Valley of the Dolls" by Santigold playing] 568 00:25:02,896 --> 00:25:04,396 [Lydia squealing] Oh my God. 569 00:25:04,480 --> 00:25:06,855 [Stacy] Remember. Don't disagree. Don't get too excited. 570 00:25:07,355 --> 00:25:11,521 [cell phones beeping, chiming] 571 00:25:12,980 --> 00:25:15,021 [inaudible] 572 00:25:17,355 --> 00:25:19,521 So, Lydia, any crushes? 573 00:25:20,813 --> 00:25:22,396 Oh, uh… 574 00:25:23,146 --> 00:25:26,688 No, not really. There's not a lot of options for boys in our grade. 575 00:25:26,771 --> 00:25:28,480 -You know? -[both chuckling awkwardly] 576 00:25:29,521 --> 00:25:31,438 Oh, so you only like boys? 577 00:25:31,521 --> 00:25:33,646 Uh, I think so. 578 00:25:33,730 --> 00:25:35,563 Don't worry. Some of us are straight too. 579 00:25:35,646 --> 00:25:36,646 Cool. 580 00:25:37,438 --> 00:25:38,771 I don't disagree. 581 00:25:43,271 --> 00:25:44,771 Yeah, Stacy, what about you? 582 00:25:45,438 --> 00:25:46,396 Who do you like? 583 00:25:47,730 --> 00:25:49,855 Uh, no one, really. 584 00:25:53,605 --> 00:25:57,605 Uh, people are coming to my house tomorrow if you want to come. Nothing big. 585 00:25:57,688 --> 00:25:58,730 Sounds chill. 586 00:25:59,313 --> 00:26:01,396 You guys have to come. It'll be freaking amazing! 587 00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:02,855 Her house is so cool. 588 00:26:06,355 --> 00:26:07,896 I mean, it'll be a'ight. 589 00:26:07,980 --> 00:26:11,813 [clearing throat] Uh, anyways, we should probably wash this off before we go. 590 00:26:11,896 --> 00:26:14,813 -Uh, we have to change before we leave. -Where are we going? 591 00:26:14,896 --> 00:26:16,313 To the ledge. 592 00:26:17,521 --> 00:26:19,521 [girls chattering indistinctly] 593 00:26:22,521 --> 00:26:24,355 -No way. -We'll be careful. 594 00:26:24,438 --> 00:26:25,563 I don't want to die. 595 00:26:25,646 --> 00:26:27,355 -We have to. We can't disagree. -What? 596 00:26:27,438 --> 00:26:28,438 Don't act excited! 597 00:26:28,521 --> 00:26:29,938 [Kym] Andy will be there. 598 00:26:34,021 --> 00:26:35,771 Come on, Lydia, can't you do this for me? 599 00:26:35,855 --> 00:26:37,938 I already got you invited here. Isn't that enough? 600 00:26:40,521 --> 00:26:41,896 I didn't mean it like that. 601 00:26:41,980 --> 00:26:43,438 You guys coming or what? 602 00:26:43,521 --> 00:26:44,688 Yeah, I'm down. 603 00:26:46,646 --> 00:26:48,646 ["Obxessed" by Fire Choir playing] 604 00:26:55,980 --> 00:26:58,355 [girls chattering indistinctly] 605 00:26:58,438 --> 00:27:00,105 ♪ It's irresistible ♪ 606 00:27:00,188 --> 00:27:02,480 ♪ I'm so stuck on you ♪ 607 00:27:03,396 --> 00:27:06,480 Ugh, my mom said I have to wait a year before I can get lip filler. 608 00:27:06,563 --> 00:27:08,855 She said you can have Botox. Just use that on your lips. 609 00:27:08,938 --> 00:27:09,771 [girl] Yeah. 610 00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:13,480 ♪ I might be a little obsessed ♪ 611 00:27:15,563 --> 00:27:16,855 [both squealing quietly] 612 00:27:18,688 --> 00:27:20,105 Look who's here! 613 00:27:20,188 --> 00:27:21,896 ♪ I might be a little obsessed ♪ 614 00:27:22,396 --> 00:27:25,021 ["Nikes On" by Healy playing] 615 00:27:25,605 --> 00:27:28,396 ♪ What's a feeling Without someone to feel it? ♪ 616 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:31,355 ♪ What's appealing? Sleep in on the weekend ♪ 617 00:27:31,438 --> 00:27:34,063 ♪ Home solo, spinning on the ceiling ♪ 618 00:27:34,771 --> 00:27:36,313 ♪ And every day is the same ♪ 619 00:27:36,396 --> 00:27:39,063 ♪ When the name of the game's Break sweat to break even ♪ 620 00:27:39,146 --> 00:27:40,063 [song stops] 621 00:27:40,146 --> 00:27:41,438 [Andy] What up, what up? 622 00:27:43,563 --> 00:27:44,563 What's good? 623 00:27:45,855 --> 00:27:46,688 Hi, Stacy. 624 00:27:47,480 --> 00:27:48,313 Hey, Mateo. 625 00:27:48,396 --> 00:27:51,646 Yo, we just had soccer, and we kicked St. Catherine's ass, 3-0. 626 00:27:51,730 --> 00:27:53,063 Even though their field sucks. 627 00:27:53,146 --> 00:27:55,396 Yeah, that field is so lopsided. 628 00:27:57,146 --> 00:27:58,105 Exactly. 629 00:27:58,896 --> 00:27:59,730 Uh, 630 00:28:00,355 --> 00:28:01,355 how's your head? 631 00:28:06,313 --> 00:28:08,980 It's, um… it's still on her body, so… 632 00:28:09,563 --> 00:28:10,730 Yeah, we love that. 633 00:28:10,813 --> 00:28:13,271 And I'm not barfing, so, yeah. 634 00:28:14,938 --> 00:28:15,938 [Mateo chuckling] 635 00:28:16,021 --> 00:28:18,021 Uh, anyways… 636 00:28:18,938 --> 00:28:20,355 What's up? I'm Andy. 637 00:28:20,438 --> 00:28:23,396 Uh, I know. We, uh… we go to Hebrew school together. Lydia. 638 00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:24,688 We do? 639 00:28:24,771 --> 00:28:25,980 Yeah. 640 00:28:27,438 --> 00:28:29,605 [Aaron] I dare one of you guys to jump in! 641 00:28:29,688 --> 00:28:31,063 Come on! Let's go. 642 00:28:31,146 --> 00:28:32,355 [Mateo] Jump off the ledge, Aaron? 643 00:28:32,438 --> 00:28:35,021 You'd break both legs on impact and your spine. 644 00:28:35,105 --> 00:28:36,938 Yeah, I heard Melissa Quinto's cousin jumped, 645 00:28:37,021 --> 00:28:39,396 and she now has to text with her nose, so, no. 646 00:28:39,480 --> 00:28:41,271 Looks like it might be fun. 647 00:28:41,355 --> 00:28:42,813 [tense music playing] 648 00:28:42,896 --> 00:28:44,730 Hey, I'd jump if I didn't have my contacts in. 649 00:28:44,813 --> 00:28:47,230 Oh, I'd be happy to hold them for you, Aaron. 650 00:28:47,313 --> 00:28:49,313 [all laughing] 651 00:28:50,771 --> 00:28:53,813 Oh shit. You can't see. 652 00:28:53,896 --> 00:28:55,480 [tense music swelling] 653 00:28:56,521 --> 00:28:57,355 I'll do it. 654 00:28:58,688 --> 00:28:59,521 What? 655 00:29:00,646 --> 00:29:01,730 [Andy] You'd jump in? 656 00:29:01,813 --> 00:29:04,021 That… that's sick. 657 00:29:04,105 --> 00:29:05,188 Let's see it. 658 00:29:05,271 --> 00:29:07,521 [upbeat electronic music playing] 659 00:29:07,605 --> 00:29:08,438 Okay. 660 00:29:09,105 --> 00:29:10,896 -No way, no way. -Oh shit. 661 00:29:10,980 --> 00:29:12,813 [Aaron] If she jumps, it's my idea, guys. 662 00:29:12,896 --> 00:29:14,855 [boy] We don't know if that's shallow. 663 00:29:14,938 --> 00:29:16,938 [kids murmuring] 664 00:29:32,105 --> 00:29:34,480 -She's not gonna do it. -She's not gonna do it. 665 00:29:34,563 --> 00:29:36,813 -If she dies, we weren't here. -Hell no. 666 00:29:36,896 --> 00:29:39,105 -[girl] She's a scaredy-cat. -[boy] She's stalling. 667 00:29:39,646 --> 00:29:42,896 Stacy, you said we'd be careful. Please. 668 00:29:43,396 --> 00:29:44,313 Is Andy watching? 669 00:29:45,938 --> 00:29:47,605 [indistinct chatter] 670 00:29:47,688 --> 00:29:49,230 Everyone is watching! 671 00:29:50,646 --> 00:29:53,771 Friedman! Yo, you got this! Let's go! 672 00:29:53,855 --> 00:29:54,688 [kids cheering] 673 00:29:54,771 --> 00:29:56,730 -[Andy] Let's get it! -Stacy, do not do this to me. 674 00:29:56,813 --> 00:30:00,355 If you die, your parents will kill me. I swear to God. Stacy! No! 675 00:30:00,438 --> 00:30:02,021 -[music stops] -[inaudible] 676 00:30:09,730 --> 00:30:12,230 -Oh my God! -Holy shit! 677 00:30:12,313 --> 00:30:13,896 -My God! -Oh my God! 678 00:30:16,938 --> 00:30:18,105 [kids clamoring] 679 00:30:18,188 --> 00:30:19,313 [Lydia] Stacy! 680 00:30:19,980 --> 00:30:21,271 -Stacy! -Oh shit! 681 00:30:22,146 --> 00:30:23,813 [girl] That was unreal! 682 00:30:26,105 --> 00:30:28,063 -[boy] Stacy! -Woohoo! 683 00:30:28,146 --> 00:30:29,146 [Stacy gasping] 684 00:30:29,230 --> 00:30:30,771 -That was my idea! -Yo, shut up! 685 00:30:30,855 --> 00:30:33,355 Yo, Stacy Friedman! 686 00:30:33,438 --> 00:30:35,646 You're a fricken' legend! 687 00:30:35,730 --> 00:30:37,605 That's how I do it! 688 00:30:38,188 --> 00:30:40,230 [kids chattering indistinctly] 689 00:30:40,313 --> 00:30:41,938 What is that? 690 00:30:42,438 --> 00:30:43,813 [kids quieting] 691 00:30:44,646 --> 00:30:46,646 [dramatic music playing] 692 00:30:47,813 --> 00:30:50,146 [Andy] Oh, disgusting. 693 00:30:50,230 --> 00:30:53,688 Yo, Stacy just turned the ledge into the Red Sea. 694 00:30:53,771 --> 00:30:55,521 [kids laughing] 695 00:30:58,938 --> 00:30:59,896 [Anya] Chill out. 696 00:30:59,980 --> 00:31:01,938 It's just a period, guys. It happens every month. 697 00:31:02,021 --> 00:31:03,396 That looks like two months. 698 00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:05,438 You couldn't deal with having a period, Aaron. 699 00:31:05,521 --> 00:31:06,521 Yeah, you punk. 700 00:31:06,605 --> 00:31:08,063 Wait, what'd I even do? 701 00:31:08,646 --> 00:31:10,438 [kids chuckling] 702 00:31:10,521 --> 00:31:11,646 [Stacy exhaling] 703 00:31:12,146 --> 00:31:14,146 [scattered chuckling] 704 00:31:20,605 --> 00:31:22,313 Thanks for laughing with everyone. 705 00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:24,813 I wasn't laughing. 706 00:31:24,896 --> 00:31:26,188 Yes, you were. 707 00:31:26,271 --> 00:31:29,021 Stacy, it's not that big of a deal. Just take my sweatshirt. 708 00:31:29,105 --> 00:31:31,938 Not a big deal? That was humiliating! Andy looked at me like-- 709 00:31:32,021 --> 00:31:34,313 You're a badass! That's all anyone was thinking. 710 00:31:34,396 --> 00:31:36,730 No, whatever. I'm over him. 711 00:31:38,563 --> 00:31:39,730 Call it. 712 00:31:39,813 --> 00:31:42,355 -Stacy, think this through. -I did. Call it. 713 00:31:42,980 --> 00:31:43,813 [Lydia scoffing] 714 00:31:46,188 --> 00:31:47,271 5:23. 715 00:31:47,355 --> 00:31:50,855 Stacy Friedman's crush on Andy Goldfarb has ended. 716 00:31:50,938 --> 00:31:54,146 Time of death, 5:23 p.m. 717 00:31:54,230 --> 00:31:55,896 Okay, let's just go. 718 00:31:55,980 --> 00:31:57,855 No, you just stay with your new friends. 719 00:31:57,938 --> 00:31:59,480 What? What are you talking about? 720 00:31:59,563 --> 00:32:01,813 Oh my God, stop! You didn't have my back. Just admit it! 721 00:32:01,896 --> 00:32:04,438 You stop. I told you not to jump. I didn't even want to be here. 722 00:32:04,521 --> 00:32:06,813 Only because you already got them to come to your party! 723 00:32:06,896 --> 00:32:10,230 -You're being so dramatic right now! -You're such a wannabe right now! 724 00:32:11,855 --> 00:32:13,438 I'm freezing. I'm gonna go. 725 00:32:13,521 --> 00:32:16,188 Wow, Stacy. I can't even. 726 00:32:16,271 --> 00:32:17,688 I can't even, even more. 727 00:32:17,771 --> 00:32:19,771 [somber music playing] 728 00:32:20,563 --> 00:32:21,605 [music fades] 729 00:32:21,688 --> 00:32:22,813 [Danny] What you gonna do, sweets? 730 00:32:22,896 --> 00:32:24,521 [Bree] Sending out the invitations today. 731 00:32:24,605 --> 00:32:27,230 I have to get my hair dyed-- Oh, will you call DJ Schmuley? 732 00:32:27,313 --> 00:32:29,980 He's asking for a green room and per diem. 733 00:32:30,063 --> 00:32:31,896 And he may or may not have hit on me. 734 00:32:31,980 --> 00:32:33,813 Well, I may or may not punch him in the face. 735 00:32:33,896 --> 00:32:35,813 -Yeah, okay. [chuckling] -Let me handle Schmuley. 736 00:32:35,896 --> 00:32:38,021 So, you, I'm going to the movies. You want to come? 737 00:32:38,730 --> 00:32:41,271 Too weird being at a movie theater alone with my dad. 738 00:32:41,355 --> 00:32:44,230 Okay, you never want to be with me again? What are you gonna do all day? 739 00:32:44,313 --> 00:32:48,146 Zaara's coming over, and we're going to online shop and then take a nap outside. 740 00:32:48,896 --> 00:32:50,105 And that's not weird to you? 741 00:32:50,188 --> 00:32:52,605 We're tired from frickin' school all week! 742 00:32:53,771 --> 00:32:57,480 Honey, go have quality time with your younger daughter who still loves you. 743 00:32:57,563 --> 00:32:58,938 -[Danny] Yeah. -Okay? Have a good day. 744 00:32:59,021 --> 00:33:00,896 This one scares me. 745 00:33:04,105 --> 00:33:06,521 -Miss you already, Daddy! -[Danny] Do ya? Great. 746 00:33:07,146 --> 00:33:09,146 [music playing on phone] 747 00:33:11,688 --> 00:33:13,688 [indistinct cheering, chatter on phone] 748 00:33:15,688 --> 00:33:17,646 Oh my God! 749 00:33:17,730 --> 00:33:19,938 [inaudible] 750 00:33:24,438 --> 00:33:27,730 [hip-hop music playing] 751 00:33:32,396 --> 00:33:33,438 [cell phone chiming] 752 00:33:36,521 --> 00:33:37,771 [knocking on door] 753 00:33:37,855 --> 00:33:40,355 -We ready in there, buddy? -[Stacy] One second, Dad! 754 00:33:41,146 --> 00:33:42,313 [Stacy exhaling] 755 00:33:53,105 --> 00:33:54,438 [cell phone beeping] 756 00:33:56,521 --> 00:33:57,438 [knocking on door] 757 00:33:57,521 --> 00:33:59,980 Don't do this to me. Let's go! 758 00:34:00,063 --> 00:34:01,146 [Stacy] Coming! 759 00:34:04,730 --> 00:34:05,813 [Danny] Bubie, I'm psyched. 760 00:34:05,896 --> 00:34:08,771 I'm psyched about the popcorn. Lots of butter. 761 00:34:09,563 --> 00:34:11,521 Lots of anger after I finish it. 762 00:34:11,605 --> 00:34:14,688 -Lots of oil on my face. -Dad, can I skip the movies? 763 00:34:14,771 --> 00:34:17,771 You wanna skip the movie? How come? You don't want to be seen with me either? 764 00:34:17,855 --> 00:34:21,146 No, no, no. I just need to talk to Lydia. Can you drop me at her house? 765 00:34:22,146 --> 00:34:23,230 Sure, buddy. 766 00:34:24,355 --> 00:34:26,438 What's the matter? Something bugging you? 767 00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:29,271 It'll be fine. Whatever it is. 768 00:34:31,563 --> 00:34:33,896 Here. Don't tell your mother. Have some coffee. 769 00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:36,521 One sip… [yelling] I gotcha. 770 00:34:36,605 --> 00:34:37,771 -[laughing] -Gotcha. 771 00:34:37,855 --> 00:34:39,771 [light music playing] 772 00:34:40,688 --> 00:34:44,771 -[Danny] All right. Have fun. I love you. -[Stacy] Thank you. Love you. 773 00:34:44,855 --> 00:34:46,771 I'll just be all alone at the movies, 774 00:34:46,855 --> 00:34:49,188 crying and eating a bucket of Sour Patch Kids! 775 00:34:49,271 --> 00:34:52,146 -A'ight! -[Danny] Okay. Text me if you need me. 776 00:34:52,230 --> 00:34:53,271 I will! 777 00:34:55,355 --> 00:34:57,355 [hip-hop music playing over stereo] 778 00:35:01,271 --> 00:35:03,355 ["Past Life" by Arkellis playing] 779 00:35:08,730 --> 00:35:10,146 ♪ Feeling like I'm falling ♪ 780 00:35:10,230 --> 00:35:13,105 ♪ I've been getting uptight Staring at the ceiling ♪ 781 00:35:13,188 --> 00:35:16,980 ♪ Trying to get it just right You know what's on mind ♪ 782 00:35:17,063 --> 00:35:20,146 ♪ I can't look you in the eye ♪ 783 00:35:20,230 --> 00:35:23,188 ♪ I'm getting on the freeway Underneath the night sky ♪ 784 00:35:23,271 --> 00:35:26,021 ♪ I'm a little wallflower Singing "One Headlight" ♪ 785 00:35:26,105 --> 00:35:28,480 ♪ Looking for a sign ♪ 786 00:35:28,563 --> 00:35:31,271 ♪ Superstition made me blind ♪ 787 00:35:31,355 --> 00:35:33,855 ♪ I'm sick of running from a past life ♪ 788 00:35:34,438 --> 00:35:36,605 ♪ I don't care about the next one ♪ 789 00:35:37,188 --> 00:35:39,646 ♪ Right now I'm feeling like a stranger ♪ 790 00:35:40,396 --> 00:35:42,021 ♪ Don't recognize the voice inside my… ♪ 791 00:35:42,105 --> 00:35:45,730 -[girl] Oh. Uh, Stacy, you would know. -Uh, how do you turn on the jacuzzi jets? 792 00:35:46,313 --> 00:35:48,105 Uh, the switch is in the pantry. 793 00:35:48,188 --> 00:35:50,105 -The pantry? -Pantry? 794 00:35:50,188 --> 00:35:52,355 [indistinct chatter] 795 00:35:54,313 --> 00:35:56,771 ♪ Don't recognize the voice Inside my head ♪ 796 00:35:56,855 --> 00:35:59,188 ♪ 'Cause I've been running From a past life ♪ 797 00:35:59,688 --> 00:36:02,980 ♪ I wanna live I wanna live this life instead ♪ 798 00:36:07,230 --> 00:36:08,688 Oh my God. 799 00:36:13,313 --> 00:36:14,521 Oh my God. 800 00:36:21,105 --> 00:36:23,605 -[Lydia] Stacy! Stacy! -[Aaron] Oh, snap. 801 00:36:23,688 --> 00:36:26,146 Yo, shit just got real. [chuckling] 802 00:36:27,063 --> 00:36:27,896 [Lydia] Stacy. 803 00:36:28,396 --> 00:36:29,896 Stacy, he kissed me! 804 00:36:29,980 --> 00:36:31,480 You don't even like him! 805 00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:34,521 You're like David and Bathsheba, and you're the snake. 806 00:36:34,605 --> 00:36:36,521 -I'm sorry, okay. I-- -Stop talking! 807 00:36:36,605 --> 00:36:38,438 Let me explain? Please? I haven't done anything. 808 00:36:38,521 --> 00:36:40,605 No! Let me explain some things to you. 809 00:36:40,688 --> 00:36:42,980 First of all, we are no longer friends. 810 00:36:43,063 --> 00:36:47,313 Second of all, I am definitely not doing your entrance video. 811 00:36:47,938 --> 00:36:50,771 -Stacy. -Oh! And one more thing… 812 00:36:52,271 --> 00:36:56,813 Lydia Rodriguez Katz, you are so not invited to my Bat Mitzvah. 813 00:36:58,980 --> 00:37:01,355 Good! Have fun without me! 814 00:37:02,396 --> 00:37:03,313 [sniffling] 815 00:37:04,688 --> 00:37:05,730 [Andy laughing] 816 00:37:07,438 --> 00:37:08,646 [crying] 817 00:37:09,146 --> 00:37:11,813 [Stacy, narrating] Dear God, Stacy Friedman here. 818 00:37:12,313 --> 00:37:15,563 And what the hell? 819 00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:18,063 How could you do this to me? 820 00:37:18,146 --> 00:37:20,063 ["traitor" by Olivia Rodrigo playing] 821 00:37:26,855 --> 00:37:30,896 ♪ Brown guilty eyes And little white lies ♪ 822 00:37:30,980 --> 00:37:34,771 ♪ Yeah, I played dumb but I always knew ♪ 823 00:37:36,313 --> 00:37:40,605 ♪ That you talked to her Maybe did even worse ♪ 824 00:37:40,688 --> 00:37:43,146 ♪ I kept quiet so I could keep you ♪ 825 00:37:43,230 --> 00:37:44,105 [Stacy sniffling] 826 00:37:45,313 --> 00:37:48,105 ♪ You betrayed me ♪ 827 00:37:48,188 --> 00:37:54,271 ♪ And I know that you'll never feel sorry For the way I hurt, yeah ♪ 828 00:37:54,355 --> 00:37:55,480 Okay, bye, Stacy. 829 00:37:56,355 --> 00:37:57,271 [Zaara gasping] 830 00:37:57,355 --> 00:37:59,771 Oh, oh, Z. It's okay. Go back to bed. 831 00:37:59,855 --> 00:38:02,480 -[Zaara moaning] -You're fine. I promise. You're fine. 832 00:38:02,980 --> 00:38:04,980 -♪ But that didn't matter ♪ -[inaudible] 833 00:38:05,063 --> 00:38:09,771 ♪ It took you two weeks To go off and date her ♪ 834 00:38:09,855 --> 00:38:12,938 ♪ Guess you didn't cheat But you're still a traitor ♪ 835 00:38:13,021 --> 00:38:15,396 [Nikki] Stacy, wait up. Stace, wait up. 836 00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:17,188 Are you okay? What happened? 837 00:38:17,271 --> 00:38:19,896 Yeah. Everybody keeps asking us if you need a double-X tampon. 838 00:38:19,980 --> 00:38:22,063 -I'm fine. -[Tara] Are you sure, Stace? 839 00:38:22,146 --> 00:38:24,688 'Cause your best friend's dating your crush. 840 00:38:24,771 --> 00:38:26,688 They're not dating. It was just one kiss. 841 00:38:26,771 --> 00:38:28,896 Oh, I heard he touched her underboob in PE this morning. 842 00:38:28,980 --> 00:38:30,646 -Tara… -[scoffing] It's fine, guys. 843 00:38:30,730 --> 00:38:32,688 Junior high gossip. Never ends. 844 00:38:36,271 --> 00:38:38,605 ["Riot Rhythm" by Sleigh Bells playing] 845 00:38:41,313 --> 00:38:43,313 [inaudible] 846 00:38:55,938 --> 00:38:57,896 -Okay, well, when did that start? -[song stops] 847 00:38:58,521 --> 00:39:00,021 Her party this weekend. 848 00:39:00,605 --> 00:39:01,855 She had the party? 849 00:39:01,938 --> 00:39:03,688 Guess so. She didn't invite us. 850 00:39:03,771 --> 00:39:06,188 No surprise, because they were awfully chummy laughing 851 00:39:06,271 --> 00:39:08,521 at my near-death experience at the ledge. 852 00:39:09,105 --> 00:39:11,105 You guys went to the ledge with Andy? 853 00:39:13,063 --> 00:39:15,313 Oh, it's just the ledge. It was last minute. 854 00:39:15,813 --> 00:39:16,771 [Tara] Hmm. 855 00:39:18,021 --> 00:39:19,855 -Come on, Tara. Let's go. -Yeah. 856 00:39:22,688 --> 00:39:25,521 Okay, today we're going to be talking about tikkun olam. 857 00:39:25,605 --> 00:39:26,896 Does anyone know what that means? 858 00:39:27,563 --> 00:39:28,480 Kym! 859 00:39:28,563 --> 00:39:31,063 If God exists, then how do you explain climate change? 860 00:39:33,438 --> 00:39:35,896 It's actually an amazing question. Um-- 861 00:39:35,980 --> 00:39:38,855 Yeah, and why can't straight people get on gay TikTok? It's way funnier. 862 00:39:38,938 --> 00:39:42,230 And if God loves me, then why is he always giving me so many zits. 863 00:39:42,313 --> 00:39:44,105 And why does Apple keep changing their chargers? 864 00:39:44,188 --> 00:39:46,438 And why did my dad's doctor operate on the wrong shoulder? 865 00:39:46,521 --> 00:39:48,771 And why do I have to share a room with my grandma? 866 00:39:50,438 --> 00:39:52,063 [Rebecca] Okay, okay, okay. 867 00:39:52,146 --> 00:39:56,563 I think I can explain zits and climate change and gay TikTok. 868 00:39:56,646 --> 00:39:58,688 -[Lydia] She scares me sometimes. -[Andy] You too? 869 00:39:58,771 --> 00:40:00,646 -[drawer closing] -[maracas shaking] 870 00:40:00,730 --> 00:40:02,230 Musically! 871 00:40:02,313 --> 00:40:08,438 ♪ If God is real, then why is there war? ♪ 872 00:40:09,146 --> 00:40:12,146 ♪ Why is there injustice? ♪ 873 00:40:12,230 --> 00:40:14,605 ♪ Why are people poor? ♪ 874 00:40:15,271 --> 00:40:20,730 ♪And why have I had a yeast infection ♪ 875 00:40:20,813 --> 00:40:25,938 ♪ for a solid 11 years? ♪ 876 00:40:26,021 --> 00:40:28,688 ♪ The answer is clear ♪ 877 00:40:31,855 --> 00:40:33,813 -♪ God is random ♪ -[scattered laughter] 878 00:40:33,896 --> 00:40:35,730 ♪ God is random ♪ 879 00:40:35,813 --> 00:40:37,313 ♪ God is random sauce ♪ 880 00:40:37,396 --> 00:40:38,480 Everybody! 881 00:40:38,563 --> 00:40:40,271 [all] ♪ God is random ♪ 882 00:40:40,355 --> 00:40:41,896 ♪ God is random ♪ 883 00:40:42,396 --> 00:40:44,605 Your prayer book is the playbill, cutie-pops… 884 00:40:44,688 --> 00:40:46,480 [clicking tongue] …razzle-dazzle. 885 00:40:46,563 --> 00:40:48,021 [both chuckling] 886 00:40:48,105 --> 00:40:50,771 -[dramatic music playing] -[inaudible] 887 00:41:11,438 --> 00:41:12,521 [Rebecca] Seema! 888 00:41:14,771 --> 00:41:17,396 What did Rabbi Rebecca say about being on your phone? 889 00:41:18,313 --> 00:41:21,188 Right? Aaron knows what I'm talking about. Come on, dude. 890 00:41:22,688 --> 00:41:24,938 -Yup, Baruch HaShem, Aaron. -[Aaron] Yes, sir. 891 00:41:25,688 --> 00:41:27,938 -[machinery whirring] -[rhythmic thumping] 892 00:41:31,563 --> 00:41:34,230 All right, what's going on, young lady? 893 00:41:34,313 --> 00:41:37,021 You used to be such a good, respectful kid. 894 00:41:37,105 --> 00:41:39,896 Now, you're on your phone. You're not practicing your portion. 895 00:41:39,980 --> 00:41:42,438 Talk to me, sis. [clapping] What's crappenin'? 896 00:41:43,688 --> 00:41:47,480 Do you know what your portion is about? Do you understand Ki Tisa? 897 00:41:47,980 --> 00:41:50,855 Yeah. Lots of golden calf talk and stuff like that. 898 00:41:51,980 --> 00:41:56,021 Yeah, but it's also about becoming your own individual person. 899 00:41:56,105 --> 00:41:58,396 It's about taking responsibilities for your mistakes. 900 00:41:58,480 --> 00:41:59,730 You know, grown-up stuff? 901 00:42:00,396 --> 00:42:02,021 Let me take a wild guess. 902 00:42:02,105 --> 00:42:04,771 You haven't started your mitzvah project yet either, huh? 903 00:42:05,730 --> 00:42:07,271 I'm narrowing it down. 904 00:42:07,355 --> 00:42:10,646 Seema, I'm telling you, the sooner you do your mitzvah, 905 00:42:10,730 --> 00:42:13,188 which is a good deed, a commandment by the way, 906 00:42:13,271 --> 00:42:15,688 the sooner you'll find things falling into place. 907 00:42:17,563 --> 00:42:19,730 Wait, so, if I do a mitzvah, God will reward me? 908 00:42:19,813 --> 00:42:22,688 -[panting] No, not reward-- -And he'll give me what I want? 909 00:42:22,771 --> 00:42:24,313 Well, I definitely did not say that. 910 00:42:24,396 --> 00:42:26,980 No, thank you, Rabbi. You helped me so much. I gotta get to work. 911 00:42:27,063 --> 00:42:28,105 Wait. No, no, no! 912 00:42:28,188 --> 00:42:30,188 Gotta start my journey, Rabbi Rebecca! 913 00:42:30,271 --> 00:42:31,313 Can you get me a Gatorade? 914 00:42:32,938 --> 00:42:34,938 [upbeat music playing] 915 00:42:35,021 --> 00:42:36,980 [indistinct chatter] 916 00:42:48,438 --> 00:42:50,563 [Lydia] Hey, uh, can I sit here? -[girl] Sure. 917 00:43:11,646 --> 00:43:12,563 Hey. 918 00:43:14,105 --> 00:43:16,230 You wouldn't happen to know why people keep asking me 919 00:43:16,313 --> 00:43:18,605 if they can floss their teeth with my nipple hair today, 920 00:43:18,688 --> 00:43:19,938 do you, Stacy? 921 00:43:20,021 --> 00:43:21,730 Uh, no. 922 00:43:21,813 --> 00:43:24,980 You know, seventh grade is hard enough without people pointing and laughing at me 923 00:43:25,063 --> 00:43:28,355 whenever I walk down the hall, screaming out, "Here, comes spider-nips." 924 00:43:28,438 --> 00:43:31,063 Better than, "Here comes Aunt Flow and the Blood-Pads!" 925 00:43:31,146 --> 00:43:32,396 But that really happened, Stacy. 926 00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:35,355 -How do I know your nipples are hairless? -Because you do! 927 00:43:37,396 --> 00:43:40,605 Why are you dating him? I thought it was just one kiss? 928 00:43:41,105 --> 00:43:43,771 And stop doing Rabbi Rebecca impressions to Andy. 929 00:43:43,855 --> 00:43:46,063 That's my impression, you freaking ripoff artist! 930 00:43:46,146 --> 00:43:49,438 [in funny voice] And I'm the star, cutie-pops, razzle-dazzle! 931 00:43:49,521 --> 00:43:50,355 [woman laughing] 932 00:43:50,938 --> 00:43:53,813 That sounds so much like her! Do Cantor Jerry. 933 00:43:54,480 --> 00:43:55,521 I don't know how. 934 00:43:56,563 --> 00:43:58,730 Boo! 935 00:43:58,813 --> 00:44:02,063 -[Ronnie] Um, uh, chicken? -Ronnie? Ronnie. 936 00:44:02,146 --> 00:44:04,646 Can you help with my mitzvah project? I need to get on that ASAP. 937 00:44:04,730 --> 00:44:07,521 I'm kind of in the middle of something. Oh, chicken parmesan! 938 00:44:07,605 --> 00:44:08,521 Correct. 939 00:44:08,605 --> 00:44:11,396 Honey, why don't you and Lydia do something with the homeless 940 00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:13,563 or volunteer at the animal shelter? 941 00:44:13,646 --> 00:44:16,146 Cause it’s my Bat Mitzvah and I’m not doing my project with Lydia. 942 00:44:16,230 --> 00:44:17,313 It's a statement about me. 943 00:44:17,396 --> 00:44:19,480 Stace, that's what you said about the egg roll piñata. 944 00:44:19,563 --> 00:44:21,146 -And the dress. -And your hair. 945 00:44:21,230 --> 00:44:23,230 Shut up, Zaara. Why are you always here? 946 00:44:23,313 --> 00:44:24,480 -Hey. -[camera clicking] 947 00:44:24,563 --> 00:44:27,146 Ugh! You guys don't get what this means. Nobody does. 948 00:44:27,230 --> 00:44:29,230 [Zaara chuckling, exclaiming] 949 00:44:29,313 --> 00:44:31,021 Biggest drama queen in the room? 950 00:44:31,105 --> 00:44:33,855 -[Zaara] Correct. -Oh my God! You're not funny. 951 00:44:33,938 --> 00:44:35,313 Girls, leave her alone. 952 00:44:40,230 --> 00:44:42,646 [Stacy and recording, in Hebrew] Vayar Aharon 953 00:44:42,730 --> 00:44:46,771 vayiven mizbayach l'fanav 954 00:44:47,271 --> 00:44:49,855 vayikra Aharon 955 00:44:50,480 --> 00:44:52,605 -Ugh. Oh my God. -[recording continues] 956 00:44:52,688 --> 00:44:53,646 [recording stops] 957 00:44:53,730 --> 00:44:56,313 [both resuming in Hebrew] Vayar Aharon 958 00:44:56,396 --> 00:44:58,396 -[recording] vayiven mizbayach l'fanav -[Stacy slips up] 959 00:44:58,480 --> 00:45:00,271 -What the heck? -[recording stops] 960 00:45:02,521 --> 00:45:03,730 [sighing] 961 00:45:08,146 --> 00:45:10,146 ["ABCDEFU" by GAYLE playing] 962 00:45:10,938 --> 00:45:13,521 [mouse clicking] 963 00:45:18,646 --> 00:45:20,896 [Stacy, in recording] If that was you and a boy, what would you do? 964 00:45:22,271 --> 00:45:24,063 -[Lydia kissing] -[Stacy laughing] 965 00:45:25,521 --> 00:45:27,271 [Stacy, in recording] Let's get a closeup of that one. 966 00:45:27,355 --> 00:45:28,646 [Lydia] Hmm. Look at that. 967 00:45:28,730 --> 00:45:30,563 -Mmm, mmm, mmm. -[both laughing] 968 00:45:31,146 --> 00:45:32,980 [Lydia sniffing deeply, exhaling] 969 00:45:33,063 --> 00:45:36,563 -[Stacy] Why do you always do that? -[Lydia] I like the way my feet smell! 970 00:45:36,646 --> 00:45:39,105 -She sounds like a lawnmower. So loud! -[girls giggling] 971 00:45:42,105 --> 00:45:43,313 Did you get the full flip? 972 00:45:43,396 --> 00:45:45,980 -[Stacy] I got a full booger. -Stop. Erase that right now, please. 973 00:45:46,063 --> 00:45:47,271 This is how I'm gonna kiss. 974 00:45:48,188 --> 00:45:50,105 We're waiting for her to pop a pimple. 975 00:45:50,188 --> 00:45:52,021 Oh my God, I think I peed myself. 976 00:45:52,105 --> 00:45:54,396 Kym and Megan and Anya, they suck. 977 00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:55,605 They're very dumb. 978 00:45:55,688 --> 00:45:57,021 Her real toes are hairy. 979 00:45:57,855 --> 00:45:59,271 [voices overlapping] 980 00:45:59,355 --> 00:46:01,355 [Stacy] What is the biggest lie you've ever told? 981 00:46:01,938 --> 00:46:03,980 Have you ever farted from the front? 982 00:46:04,063 --> 00:46:06,105 -[Tara] Yeah, like your vajayjay? -Juicy! 983 00:46:06,188 --> 00:46:09,021 -Want me to show you? I have to prepare. -[Stacy] Yes. Let's see it. 984 00:46:09,105 --> 00:46:10,813 [Stacy] Stop. You have an exercise? 985 00:46:11,521 --> 00:46:13,188 [Stacy] No, poor Nikki. 986 00:46:13,271 --> 00:46:14,313 [girls giggling] 987 00:46:14,938 --> 00:46:15,938 [Lydia flatulating] 988 00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:19,396 [Lydia] I was showing them how to queef. 989 00:46:19,480 --> 00:46:20,646 Wha-- 990 00:46:34,188 --> 00:46:35,896 You better not show this to anyone. 991 00:46:35,980 --> 00:46:37,938 I swear to God, if you show this to anyone, 992 00:46:38,021 --> 00:46:39,188 I literally will murder you. 993 00:46:39,271 --> 00:46:40,855 You understand this? You understand that? 994 00:46:40,938 --> 00:46:42,980 -[Stacy] I wouldn't do that. -[Lydia] Okay, good. 995 00:46:43,063 --> 00:46:43,938 [Stacy] Love you. 996 00:46:47,771 --> 00:46:49,980 Stop, I'm being serious. This could be dangerous. 997 00:46:50,063 --> 00:46:51,646 [emotional music playing] 998 00:46:51,730 --> 00:46:53,521 [Danny] They're both nuts together. 999 00:46:53,605 --> 00:46:55,730 [Bree] Stacy, stop smothering Lydia. 1000 00:46:55,813 --> 00:46:58,771 -[woman 2] Aw, that's nice! -[Stacy laughing] 1001 00:46:58,855 --> 00:47:02,188 Thanks for watching. Bye! 1002 00:47:11,938 --> 00:47:15,021 [Stacy and recording, in Hebrew] Vayar Aharon 1003 00:47:15,105 --> 00:47:19,188 vayiven mizbayach l'fanav 1004 00:47:19,271 --> 00:47:21,188 vayikra Aharon 1005 00:47:21,271 --> 00:47:22,480 [in frustration] My lo-- 1006 00:47:22,563 --> 00:47:24,771 ["Hold Me Down" by the Happy Fits playing] 1007 00:47:24,855 --> 00:47:28,855 ♪ I'm here, my love But I'm floating, baby ♪ 1008 00:47:28,938 --> 00:47:31,521 ♪ Hold me down tight When I'm losing my mind… ♪ 1009 00:47:31,605 --> 00:47:32,521 [crowd cheering] 1010 00:47:32,605 --> 00:47:37,188 Oh yeah! Mazel tov to Benjamin! 1011 00:47:37,271 --> 00:47:38,938 [all cheering] 1012 00:47:39,021 --> 00:47:40,438 [Aaron] Schmule-- 1013 00:47:41,063 --> 00:47:42,105 Hey, Schmuley! 1014 00:47:42,688 --> 00:47:43,688 What, what, what? 1015 00:47:43,771 --> 00:47:46,271 Can you play "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey? 1016 00:47:47,521 --> 00:47:50,855 Whoa. What a deep cut. 1017 00:47:50,938 --> 00:47:55,521 Get out of here with that shit! Let Schmuley handle the vibe around here! 1018 00:47:55,605 --> 00:47:57,730 ["Wolves" by Selena Gomez playing] 1019 00:47:59,313 --> 00:48:02,480 Make some noise, party people! 1020 00:48:09,480 --> 00:48:11,021 ♪ To get to you ♪ 1021 00:48:17,021 --> 00:48:19,188 -[woman] Oh. Yeah. -It's too loud in here. 1022 00:48:19,271 --> 00:48:23,605 You know, we didn't have to suffer with these Bat Mitzvahs when we were your age. 1023 00:48:23,688 --> 00:48:27,771 We just celebrated with our families, and poof, you're a woman. 1024 00:48:27,855 --> 00:48:29,771 -Yeah. -Girls didn't have Bat Mitzvahs? 1025 00:48:29,855 --> 00:48:33,938 My mother told me girls were born into God's kingdom, so we didn't have to. 1026 00:48:34,646 --> 00:48:37,355 She was full of it. She was just trying to save money. 1027 00:48:37,438 --> 00:48:39,230 [all laughing] 1028 00:48:39,313 --> 00:48:41,855 [girl screaming] 1029 00:48:43,563 --> 00:48:44,563 Go. Just go. 1030 00:48:46,021 --> 00:48:49,063 Man, that's all-time. You ever seen Evil Dead 2? 1031 00:48:49,146 --> 00:48:51,646 -Yeah, we saw it. It was weak. -Yeah, just like you two. 1032 00:48:51,730 --> 00:48:53,980 Ugh. Could you just let us watch our movie? 1033 00:48:54,730 --> 00:48:55,771 Okay. 1034 00:48:55,855 --> 00:48:58,438 ♪ I've been running with the wolves To get to you ♪ 1035 00:48:58,521 --> 00:48:59,688 [both snickering] 1036 00:48:59,771 --> 00:49:01,771 ["Hava Nagila" playing] 1037 00:49:01,855 --> 00:49:03,855 [crowd clapping rhythmically] 1038 00:49:07,271 --> 00:49:08,980 [Stacy chuckling] 1039 00:49:13,105 --> 00:49:14,188 [Danny] What's going on? 1040 00:49:14,271 --> 00:49:16,146 Why are you hanging out with us old people right now? 1041 00:49:16,230 --> 00:49:19,188 -Why are you not with your friends? -I have a stomach ache. 1042 00:49:19,271 --> 00:49:22,480 You have a stomach ache? All right. I'll get you a ginger ale. 1043 00:49:23,146 --> 00:49:25,771 You're not hot. You feel fine. 1044 00:49:27,230 --> 00:49:28,938 You don't have a stomach ache. 1045 00:49:30,563 --> 00:49:33,146 How come you're not hanging out with Lydia tonight? 1046 00:49:33,230 --> 00:49:34,188 She betrayed me. 1047 00:49:34,271 --> 00:49:37,521 She kissed my crush, and then he touched her underboob in PE. 1048 00:49:37,605 --> 00:49:39,521 -Oh. -Oy, underboob. 1049 00:49:39,605 --> 00:49:41,813 Oh, I got plenty of that. 1050 00:49:41,896 --> 00:49:45,313 Underboob, overboob, sideboob, behindboob, I got all of it. 1051 00:49:45,396 --> 00:49:46,605 Oh. 1052 00:49:46,688 --> 00:49:48,813 You know, bubelah, when I was young, 1053 00:49:48,896 --> 00:49:52,480 my best friend Susie Rebenstock and I fought over a boy, 1054 00:49:52,563 --> 00:49:54,230 and I stopped talking to her. 1055 00:49:54,313 --> 00:49:57,313 Fifty years later, I ran into her brother at Zabar's. 1056 00:49:57,396 --> 00:50:00,188 Turns out, she threw herself off a roof at 32. 1057 00:50:00,271 --> 00:50:03,146 I let a stupid boy come between us, 1058 00:50:03,230 --> 00:50:05,938 and now she's lying dead at the bottom of the Chrysler Building. 1059 00:50:06,021 --> 00:50:07,355 Oh my God. 1060 00:50:07,438 --> 00:50:10,271 -It was McDonald's. -Whatever! You get my point. 1061 00:50:10,771 --> 00:50:13,480 All I'm saying is we girls have to stick together! 1062 00:50:13,563 --> 00:50:14,730 -Yeah. -Hear, hear. 1063 00:50:14,813 --> 00:50:16,813 ["Hot Girl Bummer" by Blackbear playing] 1064 00:50:20,355 --> 00:50:22,355 [all whimpering] 1065 00:50:23,813 --> 00:50:24,771 Megan! 1066 00:50:26,480 --> 00:50:29,063 Okay. Here, Tatala, huh? 1067 00:50:29,146 --> 00:50:30,605 -Thank you. -Okay. 1068 00:50:30,688 --> 00:50:31,896 -Hiya, ladies. -Hello. 1069 00:50:31,980 --> 00:50:33,563 -[Danny] Hey, hey. -And gentleman. 1070 00:50:33,646 --> 00:50:34,855 [Danny chuckling] 1071 00:50:34,938 --> 00:50:36,313 Mind if I take your extra rolls? 1072 00:50:36,396 --> 00:50:38,688 I'm making up a plate for Andy Goldfarb's grandmother. 1073 00:50:38,771 --> 00:50:40,063 Oh, that's nice. 1074 00:50:40,146 --> 00:50:42,146 -What a respectful boy you are. -That's sweet. 1075 00:50:42,230 --> 00:50:43,771 -Here's some basketball rolls. -Gracias. 1076 00:50:43,855 --> 00:50:46,230 Wait, why are you making a plate for Andy's grandma? 1077 00:50:46,313 --> 00:50:48,396 She only gets Jell-O at her retirement home. 1078 00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:52,438 I thought that I'd get real food for Andy to bring to her when he visits tomorrow. 1079 00:50:52,521 --> 00:50:54,646 Wait, Andy's grandma's in a retirement home? 1080 00:50:55,605 --> 00:50:56,688 That's awesome. 1081 00:50:57,396 --> 00:50:58,938 Wait, why is that awesome? 1082 00:50:59,021 --> 00:51:01,021 [upbeat music playing] 1083 00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:22,980 Ooh! The bookies are here! 1084 00:51:23,063 --> 00:51:24,146 [Stacy shushing] 1085 00:51:32,521 --> 00:51:35,146 Andy? Oh, hey! 1086 00:51:36,021 --> 00:51:36,855 Yo. 1087 00:51:38,938 --> 00:51:40,480 What are you doing here? 1088 00:51:40,563 --> 00:51:42,438 I'm just visiting my grandma. 1089 00:51:42,521 --> 00:51:46,438 She's taking a nap right now, so I got to sit here till I get picked up. 1090 00:51:46,521 --> 00:51:48,646 It's so sweet that you visit her. 1091 00:51:48,730 --> 00:51:51,938 Yeah, my moms say they'll take away my Xbox if I don't. So… 1092 00:51:53,563 --> 00:51:54,646 So… 1093 00:51:55,980 --> 00:51:57,855 Are you excited about your Bar Mitzvah? 1094 00:51:57,938 --> 00:51:59,396 Yeah, it should be all right. 1095 00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:00,896 That's dope. 1096 00:52:03,855 --> 00:52:07,021 Yeah, but Lydia, she's being all salty 1097 00:52:07,105 --> 00:52:09,938 'cause she has to miss some dumb dance competition to go. 1098 00:52:10,021 --> 00:52:11,521 Ugh. I hate how competitive she is. 1099 00:52:11,605 --> 00:52:14,188 It's just like, why can't it be about the dancing? 1100 00:52:14,271 --> 00:52:17,771 Well, I mean, I play soccer, and soccer is pretty competitive. 1101 00:52:17,855 --> 00:52:21,646 Uh, well, soccer's a sport. Dance is an art. 1102 00:52:23,105 --> 00:52:24,313 Facts. 1103 00:52:24,896 --> 00:52:25,980 Real talk. 1104 00:52:26,605 --> 00:52:28,230 [cell phone vibrating] Andy Goldfarb. 1105 00:52:28,313 --> 00:52:30,605 Um, yeah. Uber's here. Gotta bounce. 1106 00:52:30,688 --> 00:52:32,646 Okay. So nice running into you. 1107 00:52:32,730 --> 00:52:33,938 Yeah, cool. 1108 00:52:37,063 --> 00:52:38,605 -Hey. -Yo! 1109 00:52:39,646 --> 00:52:41,605 -[Andy] Too slow, boy! -Jesus. 1110 00:52:41,688 --> 00:52:45,521 [Andy] Can't guard me. Ha ha, old man! Goldfarb rules! 1111 00:52:46,980 --> 00:52:49,230 Still waitin' on me bookies! 1112 00:52:49,313 --> 00:52:50,480 It's right here. 1113 00:52:52,355 --> 00:52:53,688 I don't want that one. 1114 00:52:54,355 --> 00:52:56,355 [popcorn popping] 1115 00:53:00,688 --> 00:53:04,521 Hello, Joe. Can you refill my popcorn please? Extra butter. 1116 00:53:05,146 --> 00:53:06,146 On it. 1117 00:53:08,938 --> 00:53:10,313 [Stacy, echoing in a memory] I love this Carnivale theme, 1118 00:53:10,396 --> 00:53:13,063 but your Candyland theme is going to be the best of the year. 1119 00:53:13,146 --> 00:53:15,980 [Lydia, echoing] Well, until your New York theme puts the entire school to shame! 1120 00:53:16,063 --> 00:53:17,063 [Stacy, echoing] Yeah. 1121 00:53:17,146 --> 00:53:19,188 [Stacy, echoing] Why'd we eat so many Twizzlers last night? 1122 00:53:19,271 --> 00:53:20,521 [Lydia, echoing] I don't know! 1123 00:53:20,605 --> 00:53:21,605 [Mateo] Hey, Stacy. 1124 00:53:22,105 --> 00:53:23,396 Oh, hey, Mateo. 1125 00:53:23,480 --> 00:53:26,355 Hey, can you believe no Bar or Bat Mitzvah tonight? 1126 00:53:26,438 --> 00:53:27,646 Get to go to the movies. 1127 00:53:27,730 --> 00:53:29,521 [chuckling] What are you seeing? 1128 00:53:29,605 --> 00:53:31,688 I'm not sure. Andy bought the tickets. 1129 00:53:31,771 --> 00:53:33,730 -Andy's here? -[Mateo] Yeah. 1130 00:53:33,813 --> 00:53:35,355 [indistinct chatter] 1131 00:53:36,521 --> 00:53:39,313 -Sorry, the butter nozzle's jammed. -No, it's fine. I don't need butter. 1132 00:53:39,396 --> 00:53:41,646 -All good. I know you love butter. -No, I really don't need butter. 1133 00:53:41,730 --> 00:53:43,688 I'll grab a coat hanger. This is all fixed. 1134 00:53:43,771 --> 00:53:45,480 -Dude, give me the popcorn! -[Kym] Stacy Friedman. 1135 00:53:45,563 --> 00:53:47,646 Hey, Kym! What's up? 1136 00:53:48,355 --> 00:53:51,313 Hey, yo, what's poppin'? How's the bookie business? 1137 00:53:51,396 --> 00:53:53,105 Booming. Still got your Xbox? 1138 00:53:53,688 --> 00:53:54,521 You know it. 1139 00:53:54,605 --> 00:53:55,896 [Stacy] That's what's up. 1140 00:53:57,063 --> 00:53:59,105 [Danny] Bubie, what's taking you so long? 1141 00:53:59,188 --> 00:54:01,396 Is the guy mad at us for getting three refills? 1142 00:54:01,480 --> 00:54:02,730 Where is that dude? 1143 00:54:02,813 --> 00:54:04,021 Oh, your friends are here. 1144 00:54:04,105 --> 00:54:06,605 What's up, everybody? Nice to see you guys. 1145 00:54:06,688 --> 00:54:10,063 -I like your robe, man! -Oh yeah, the kid likes the drip. 1146 00:54:10,146 --> 00:54:11,230 I like your taste. 1147 00:54:11,313 --> 00:54:13,271 So I'm gonna go outside and get a blanket 1148 00:54:13,355 --> 00:54:15,605 from the trunk of the car 'cause it's freezing in there. 1149 00:54:15,688 --> 00:54:18,646 We can kind of snuggle like we used to. All right? 1150 00:54:18,730 --> 00:54:21,938 Always fun, right? Blanket time? You know what I'm talking about, bro? 1151 00:54:22,855 --> 00:54:24,521 -Wha-- -I see you back there, Lydia. 1152 00:54:24,605 --> 00:54:26,688 -How you doing, kiddo? -Oh, hey. 1153 00:54:26,771 --> 00:54:29,605 -Love ya. Say hi to your folks. -Yeah, of course. 1154 00:54:29,688 --> 00:54:31,230 -[Danny] Miss you, buddy. -[Lydia] See you. 1155 00:54:32,896 --> 00:54:34,021 You-- Oh… 1156 00:54:35,605 --> 00:54:37,896 [dramatic music playing] 1157 00:54:44,230 --> 00:54:45,063 [music fades] 1158 00:54:45,146 --> 00:54:46,855 [Tara] Stacy! We're here. 1159 00:54:49,188 --> 00:54:50,396 Did you fall off a motorcycle? 1160 00:54:50,480 --> 00:54:53,521 -Did you eat nuts? Do you need an EpiPen? -Why do you look like a bad IG filter? 1161 00:54:53,605 --> 00:54:55,313 Can periods happen to your face? 1162 00:54:55,396 --> 00:54:56,605 Shut up. Come in. 1163 00:54:57,146 --> 00:54:59,813 -[Tara] What are you wearing? Oh my God. -[Nikki] Scandy! 1164 00:54:59,896 --> 00:55:00,771 [Stacy] Guys… 1165 00:55:00,855 --> 00:55:02,605 ["Say So" by Doja Cat playing] 1166 00:55:02,688 --> 00:55:04,980 [camera shutter clicking] 1167 00:55:06,313 --> 00:55:08,896 [Nikki] Tara, you're putting the lighting in the camera. Okay, yeah. 1168 00:55:08,980 --> 00:55:11,688 -Lift it higher. Make sure I'm glowing. -[Tara] I'm not built for this. 1169 00:55:11,771 --> 00:55:14,605 You know, I really thought we were just gonna hang out and make slime. 1170 00:55:14,688 --> 00:55:16,021 Oh my God, we're women now. 1171 00:55:17,146 --> 00:55:17,980 Maybe later. 1172 00:55:18,563 --> 00:55:19,480 How does this look? 1173 00:55:20,938 --> 00:55:22,230 Like your goldfish died. 1174 00:55:22,313 --> 00:55:23,271 Hey, just switch it up. 1175 00:55:23,855 --> 00:55:25,146 -[Tara] Okay. -There you go. 1176 00:55:26,188 --> 00:55:28,063 Seduce me. Okay? Just seduce me. 1177 00:55:28,146 --> 00:55:30,605 Oh, way better. Slay, queen. 1178 00:55:30,688 --> 00:55:32,855 Guys, this is so lame. 1179 00:55:32,938 --> 00:55:35,521 I thought we could be, like, this iconic best friend trio, you know? 1180 00:55:35,605 --> 00:55:37,438 Now that Lydia broke up with you and all. 1181 00:55:38,438 --> 00:55:42,146 Uh-oh. Now you look like all the goldfish in the world just died. 1182 00:55:42,230 --> 00:55:45,688 [sighing] No, it's fine. Let's just take more pictures and then change outfits. 1183 00:55:45,771 --> 00:55:48,063 -[Tara] There's more outfits? -That's-- Okay. Yeah. 1184 00:55:48,146 --> 00:55:49,605 [girls coughing] 1185 00:55:50,230 --> 00:55:51,980 -[Tara] Are you serious? -[Nikki] Geez, Stace. 1186 00:55:52,063 --> 00:55:54,146 [Ronnie] Whoa, what is happening? 1187 00:55:54,688 --> 00:55:56,271 Uh, taking pictures. 1188 00:55:56,355 --> 00:55:57,771 You look insane. 1189 00:55:57,855 --> 00:56:00,063 Uh, we're gonna go get some boba and then watch a movie, 1190 00:56:00,146 --> 00:56:01,438 Evil Dead 2, if you wanna come. 1191 00:56:01,521 --> 00:56:02,938 -Yeah, just-- -Oh, thank God. 1192 00:56:03,021 --> 00:56:03,980 Yes! 1193 00:56:04,063 --> 00:56:05,938 What happened to your armpits? 1194 00:56:06,021 --> 00:56:08,355 Oh, I shaved this morning. It did not go well. 1195 00:56:08,938 --> 00:56:11,063 It's fine! I didn't need you anyway. 1196 00:56:16,230 --> 00:56:18,230 [contemplative music playing] 1197 00:56:19,146 --> 00:56:20,730 [Stacy] Don't you love puzzles? 1198 00:56:22,063 --> 00:56:23,230 Puzzles are corny. 1199 00:56:23,730 --> 00:56:25,063 Facts. 1200 00:56:25,605 --> 00:56:26,938 [music fades] 1201 00:56:32,771 --> 00:56:35,980 I have a question. Is Lydia a good kisser? 1202 00:56:37,438 --> 00:56:38,313 She's a'ight. 1203 00:56:39,313 --> 00:56:40,771 A'ight? Huh. 1204 00:56:41,480 --> 00:56:43,605 Probably because you were her first kiss. 1205 00:56:43,688 --> 00:56:46,813 No, she's told me she's kissed a bunch of guys before. 1206 00:56:47,521 --> 00:56:48,521 At camp? 1207 00:56:49,438 --> 00:56:50,355 Yes. 1208 00:56:50,438 --> 00:56:54,438 Does her tight-lipped technique suggest a high level of experience? 1209 00:56:54,521 --> 00:56:57,896 Nah, it's like she thinks she's kissing a stuffed animal or something. 1210 00:56:57,980 --> 00:57:00,521 Plus, every time I try to move my hand, she starts laughing, 1211 00:57:00,605 --> 00:57:01,855 says she's mad ticklish. 1212 00:57:01,938 --> 00:57:04,480 [scoffing] You have the patience of a saint. 1213 00:57:05,021 --> 00:57:06,230 A Jewish saint. 1214 00:57:07,938 --> 00:57:08,813 True. 1215 00:57:10,396 --> 00:57:12,396 [dramatic music playing] 1216 00:57:13,021 --> 00:57:14,438 Twenty points for me. 1217 00:57:14,521 --> 00:57:15,771 Get it, Grandma. 1218 00:57:15,855 --> 00:57:18,813 Want a picture of you and your grandma to prove to your moms you're here? 1219 00:57:19,480 --> 00:57:22,146 Uh, yeah. That's low-key a good idea. 1220 00:57:24,146 --> 00:57:25,146 Okay. 1221 00:57:30,271 --> 00:57:31,730 [camera shutter clicking] 1222 00:57:31,813 --> 00:57:33,605 -[Andy] Yeah, Grandma. -Hilarious. 1223 00:57:34,355 --> 00:57:36,146 I have to prove to Rabbi Rebecca I'm here too. 1224 00:57:36,230 --> 00:57:38,230 I'm volunteering for my mitzvah project. 1225 00:57:38,313 --> 00:57:40,230 -That's what's up. -Here, I'll send it to you. 1226 00:57:40,730 --> 00:57:43,396 -For sure. -Oh, shoot. I just sent you more pics. 1227 00:57:43,480 --> 00:57:45,313 -Just ignore. -[cell phone] Andy Goldfarb. 1228 00:57:53,480 --> 00:57:54,771 Nice. 1229 00:57:58,063 --> 00:57:59,355 [music fades] 1230 00:58:00,188 --> 00:58:02,896 -[Stacy] That one's way too big on me. -Okey-dokey. 1231 00:58:02,980 --> 00:58:04,646 [pop music playing over radio] 1232 00:58:04,730 --> 00:58:07,271 Well, why don't you try the strapless one? 1233 00:58:07,355 --> 00:58:08,355 [Stacy groaning] 1234 00:58:09,063 --> 00:58:12,146 [Bree] So, how's Lydia's entrance video coming along? 1235 00:58:13,521 --> 00:58:15,146 I finished it this weekend. 1236 00:58:15,230 --> 00:58:16,063 [Bree] Great! 1237 00:58:16,771 --> 00:58:17,646 No. 1238 00:58:17,730 --> 00:58:18,896 Why is it a no? 1239 00:58:18,980 --> 00:58:20,563 [Stacy] Just-- it's just a no. 1240 00:58:20,646 --> 00:58:22,730 Well, okay, then try the last one on. 1241 00:58:22,813 --> 00:58:24,313 No, that's the worst one! 1242 00:58:24,396 --> 00:58:25,605 [Bree] Well, just try it! 1243 00:58:25,688 --> 00:58:26,855 [whining] Oh my God. 1244 00:58:26,938 --> 00:58:29,646 -[sighing heavily] -[Stacy] It's so ugly, Mom. 1245 00:58:29,730 --> 00:58:31,688 Maybe it'll look good when it's on you. 1246 00:58:33,980 --> 00:58:36,230 [gasping] Oh. 1247 00:58:37,563 --> 00:58:38,480 You know what? 1248 00:58:39,771 --> 00:58:41,105 I like this. 1249 00:58:41,188 --> 00:58:44,230 I look like the lady at school that pulls kids out of class 1250 00:58:44,313 --> 00:58:46,230 when their parents get into car accidents. 1251 00:58:46,313 --> 00:58:47,855 How often does that happen? 1252 00:58:48,980 --> 00:58:52,771 Can we please get this dress? Come on. It's the dream dress. 1253 00:58:52,855 --> 00:58:54,438 It costs more than our house. 1254 00:58:54,521 --> 00:58:57,188 Okay, so wear the cheap dress in front of God. Got it. 1255 00:58:57,271 --> 00:58:58,521 [woman] It's not cheap. 1256 00:58:58,605 --> 00:59:00,063 It's reasonable. 1257 00:59:00,146 --> 00:59:03,271 That's what every kid wants to hear on the most important day of their life. 1258 00:59:03,355 --> 00:59:05,730 "Wow, Stacy, you look so reasonable." 1259 00:59:05,813 --> 00:59:07,646 You know what? This is a nice, 1260 00:59:08,646 --> 00:59:12,646 temple-friendly, well-priced dress. And-- 1261 00:59:12,730 --> 00:59:15,980 No. Don't say it. Please, Mom. Please, I beg you. 1262 00:59:16,480 --> 00:59:19,896 -We're gettin' it. -Oh my God! You're ruining me! 1263 00:59:21,063 --> 00:59:22,771 So ugly, Mom. 1264 00:59:23,438 --> 00:59:26,896 -So, is this, like, a swipe or a chip? -[cashier] Yeah, it's a chip. 1265 00:59:26,980 --> 00:59:30,271 [Bree] Good? Okay. Wait, did I take it out too soon? 1266 00:59:33,021 --> 00:59:35,480 [Gabi] Why? We could color coordinate. 1267 00:59:35,563 --> 00:59:37,480 [Lydia] We're not color coordinating, Mom. We're not doing that. 1268 00:59:37,563 --> 00:59:39,105 -You want to ruin me? -[Gabi Okay. No. 1269 00:59:39,188 --> 00:59:41,521 It looks like something the counselor at school wears, Mom. 1270 00:59:41,605 --> 00:59:43,980 -[Gabi] Okay, okay. -[Lydia] Please, I'm not wearing that. 1271 00:59:44,813 --> 00:59:47,230 -[Eli] Yeah, I got that app too. -Eli! 1272 00:59:47,313 --> 00:59:49,063 -[Eli] What? -[Gabi] What do you think? 1273 00:59:49,146 --> 00:59:51,313 [Eli] What? Uh, Rudy, hold on a second. 1274 00:59:51,813 --> 00:59:54,146 I'm at a family function or something, uh… 1275 00:59:55,021 --> 00:59:59,063 Yeah, that dress is gorgeous, kiddo. Only the best. 1276 00:59:59,146 --> 01:00:01,605 [Lydia] Papi, you don't even know which one we're talking about. 1277 01:00:01,688 --> 01:00:04,521 It's the prettiest one. Just like you, pumpkin. 1278 01:00:05,271 --> 01:00:07,646 Twenty-three skidoo! Wee! 1279 01:00:07,730 --> 01:00:10,438 Okay, yeah, I think you gave me a good price. 1280 01:00:11,355 --> 01:00:13,813 Mom? Mom, can we go? 1281 01:00:13,896 --> 01:00:15,938 Yeah, okay. Take the dress. 1282 01:00:16,021 --> 01:00:17,646 -Thank you. -Okay. 1283 01:00:17,730 --> 01:00:18,980 So great. We got a great deal. 1284 01:00:19,063 --> 01:00:20,355 Where's Daddy? I don't remember-- 1285 01:00:20,438 --> 01:00:22,063 -No. -[gasping] Gabi! 1286 01:00:22,146 --> 01:00:22,980 Bree?! 1287 01:00:23,063 --> 01:00:24,605 Lydia! Lydia's here-- 1288 01:00:24,688 --> 01:00:26,688 Oh my God! I haven't seen you in forever! 1289 01:00:26,771 --> 01:00:27,938 [Bree] Hi! 1290 01:00:28,605 --> 01:00:31,396 [Gabi] Just like the two of us to be getting dresses at the last minute. 1291 01:00:31,480 --> 01:00:33,021 [Bree] Why plan ahead, right? 1292 01:00:33,105 --> 01:00:34,146 [tense music playing] 1293 01:00:34,230 --> 01:00:35,521 [Gabi] How are you? How's Stace? 1294 01:00:35,605 --> 01:00:39,271 [Bree] She's good. I miss Lydia. She hasn't been over in a while. 1295 01:00:39,355 --> 01:00:40,980 Eli! It's so great to see you. 1296 01:00:41,063 --> 01:00:42,230 How you doing? 1297 01:00:42,313 --> 01:00:44,480 Terrific. We're getting divorced. 1298 01:00:45,105 --> 01:00:47,980 Oh yeah. I'm-- I heard. I'm so sorry. 1299 01:00:48,063 --> 01:00:50,396 I'm not. I'm on six dating apps. 1300 01:00:50,480 --> 01:00:52,355 Six? Wow, that's a lot. 1301 01:00:52,438 --> 01:00:53,855 Andy broke up with me. 1302 01:00:54,521 --> 01:00:57,313 Hmm. Sorry to hear that. You were the perfect couple. 1303 01:00:58,396 --> 01:01:02,271 He said he couldn't deal with the ticklishness or the closed mouth kissing. 1304 01:01:03,438 --> 01:01:04,980 Sucks for you, I guess. 1305 01:01:06,188 --> 01:01:09,563 Said he heard I lied about kissing boys in camp. 1306 01:01:10,396 --> 01:01:13,438 Well, you did lie. So… 1307 01:01:14,855 --> 01:01:17,355 [indistinct chatter] 1308 01:01:19,396 --> 01:01:20,396 [Bree] See you at temple? 1309 01:01:20,480 --> 01:01:21,980 -See you at temple. -Okay. 1310 01:01:22,063 --> 01:01:24,396 Anyhoo. Gonna go. 1311 01:01:25,271 --> 01:01:26,688 -[Bree] Happy shopping! -[Gabi] Yeah! 1312 01:01:26,771 --> 01:01:28,688 -Bye, Eli! Enjoy those dating apps. -Yeah. 1313 01:01:28,771 --> 01:01:30,730 -Bye, Stacy. -See ya! Come on, honey. 1314 01:01:32,230 --> 01:01:33,480 What's that mom's name again? 1315 01:01:33,563 --> 01:01:35,188 Bree. 1316 01:01:35,271 --> 01:01:36,480 Are you kidding me? 1317 01:01:37,146 --> 01:01:39,771 You need to get your fat head in the game, Eli. 1318 01:01:39,855 --> 01:01:42,896 Stacy's father, Danny, if you could remember names, 1319 01:01:42,980 --> 01:01:47,188 who we've known since kindergarten, is so involved in every single detail! 1320 01:01:47,271 --> 01:01:48,896 Oh, he is? 1321 01:01:48,980 --> 01:01:52,771 So, which detail is that? 1322 01:01:54,521 --> 01:01:57,105 -[Danny groaning] -He's exhausted from being a good dad. 1323 01:01:57,188 --> 01:01:59,313 Honey. You wish. [scoffing] 1324 01:02:00,105 --> 01:02:01,355 Can we get ice cream? 1325 01:02:01,438 --> 01:02:03,271 [upbeat guitar playing] 1326 01:02:03,355 --> 01:02:05,813 -Did you guys already get ice cream? -No, we didn't. 1327 01:02:06,313 --> 01:02:09,230 ♪ Bim bam bim bim bam ♪ 1328 01:02:09,855 --> 01:02:11,646 ♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪ 1329 01:02:11,730 --> 01:02:13,146 ♪ Chiri chiri chiri ♪ 1330 01:02:13,230 --> 01:02:16,563 ♪ Bim bam bim bim bam ♪ 1331 01:02:16,646 --> 01:02:19,813 ♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪ 1332 01:02:19,896 --> 01:02:21,855 -[both] ♪ Shabbat shalom ♪ -[Jerry] Hey! 1333 01:02:21,938 --> 01:02:23,646 -[both] ♪ Shabbat shalom ♪ -[Jerry] Hey! 1334 01:02:23,730 --> 01:02:27,063 ♪ Shabbat, shabbat Shabbat, shabbat shalom ♪ 1335 01:02:27,146 --> 01:02:30,230 ♪ Bim bam bim bim bim bam ♪ 1336 01:02:30,313 --> 01:02:33,896 ♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪ 1337 01:02:33,980 --> 01:02:35,146 [in sing-song voice] Yes, Seema? 1338 01:02:35,230 --> 01:02:37,438 -Can I go to the bathroom? -[Rebecca] Yes you can. 1339 01:02:37,521 --> 01:02:41,105 Go pee-pee, but quickly. 1340 01:02:41,188 --> 01:02:42,355 So quickly. 1341 01:02:43,355 --> 01:02:48,480 ♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪ 1342 01:02:50,105 --> 01:02:53,230 -[Rebecca] Thank you, thank you! -Bravo! Slay, queen! 1343 01:02:55,146 --> 01:02:58,896 Does anyone know the significance of that particular piece of music, huh? 1344 01:02:59,688 --> 01:03:02,521 Yes, Andy, please enlighten us. 1345 01:03:03,480 --> 01:03:05,313 I gotta go to the bathroom too. 1346 01:03:05,396 --> 01:03:07,938 No one thinks to take a whiz before they come to class? 1347 01:03:08,021 --> 01:03:09,855 Fine, Andy, but quickly! 1348 01:03:09,938 --> 01:03:13,105 -So quickly. -So quickly. 1349 01:03:13,188 --> 01:03:15,230 [class] So quickly. 1350 01:03:15,313 --> 01:03:16,980 [Jerry] Go, Andy. 1351 01:03:17,063 --> 01:03:18,688 [class] Go, Andy. 1352 01:03:18,771 --> 01:03:20,355 [Jerry] Good luck, Andy. 1353 01:03:20,438 --> 01:03:22,480 [class] Good luck, Andy. 1354 01:03:22,563 --> 01:03:27,688 Hopefully, it's not number two! 1355 01:03:27,771 --> 01:03:29,396 [class chuckling] 1356 01:03:29,480 --> 01:03:30,438 [toilet flushing] 1357 01:03:30,521 --> 01:03:32,730 [boy] It's Mr. Mateo! 1358 01:03:32,813 --> 01:03:34,271 [kids clamoring] 1359 01:03:34,355 --> 01:03:37,230 -Mr. Potatoes. -[girl] Mr. Potato. 1360 01:03:37,313 --> 01:03:38,230 Hey, Stacy! 1361 01:03:38,313 --> 01:03:41,771 Can't believe you're not even Jewish, and you come to temple more than I do. 1362 01:03:41,855 --> 01:03:44,480 Yeah, I go to church every Sunday. 1363 01:03:44,563 --> 01:03:48,480 Might as well fill in the other six days for some, you know, holiness too. 1364 01:03:48,563 --> 01:03:51,105 I'm actually going to help these guys make challah. 1365 01:03:51,188 --> 01:03:54,563 -[kids] Challah! -Okay, okay! Challah, challah. 1366 01:03:54,646 --> 01:03:56,396 -That's what I said! -[Stacy laughing] 1367 01:03:56,480 --> 01:03:58,896 I'm waiting here for Mrs. Lippman to unlock the kitchen. 1368 01:03:58,980 --> 01:04:00,063 She's taking forever. 1369 01:04:00,146 --> 01:04:03,896 I remember when I had Mrs. Lippman, six years old, not a care in the world. 1370 01:04:03,980 --> 01:04:04,813 [girl] I got cares. 1371 01:04:04,896 --> 01:04:07,855 My mom says if I don't learn the candle blessings, 1372 01:04:07,938 --> 01:04:10,480 I can't play Call of Duty anymore! 1373 01:04:10,563 --> 01:04:11,646 Oh, that's heavy. 1374 01:04:11,730 --> 01:04:15,813 Or maybe Mr. Mateo will teach you. He probably knows it by now. 1375 01:04:15,896 --> 01:04:18,521 [Mateo, singing in Hebrew] Baruch Atah Adonai, 1376 01:04:18,605 --> 01:04:20,855 -Eloheinu Melech ha'o-- -[kids clamoring] 1377 01:04:20,938 --> 01:04:21,771 [kids cheer] 1378 01:04:21,855 --> 01:04:23,646 -Mrs. Lippman! -[mouthing] Bye. 1379 01:04:23,730 --> 01:04:24,855 See you later, Stacy. 1380 01:04:25,355 --> 01:04:27,063 [contemplative music playing] 1381 01:04:29,396 --> 01:04:31,438 -Hi, Mike. -[Mike] Shalom, Stacy. 1382 01:04:45,146 --> 01:04:46,105 What's up? 1383 01:04:47,313 --> 01:04:48,146 Hi. 1384 01:04:48,688 --> 01:04:49,646 [Andy] Hey, uh… 1385 01:04:50,646 --> 01:04:52,605 Have you ever kissed anyone? 1386 01:04:53,105 --> 01:04:54,563 [Stacy chuckling nervously] 1387 01:04:55,146 --> 01:04:56,938 Uh, no. 1388 01:04:58,521 --> 01:04:59,855 Would you want to? 1389 01:05:01,438 --> 01:05:02,313 Yeah. 1390 01:05:03,563 --> 01:05:05,188 All right, come on, let's go. 1391 01:05:07,855 --> 01:05:08,771 Come on. 1392 01:05:14,563 --> 01:05:16,688 -[girl] Um, someone's in here! -[boy] Go away! 1393 01:05:16,771 --> 01:05:17,646 [kids giggling] 1394 01:05:17,730 --> 01:05:19,355 [whispering] Where could we go? 1395 01:05:20,813 --> 01:05:22,063 Come on. Let's go. 1396 01:05:26,480 --> 01:05:28,480 [dramatic music playing] 1397 01:05:38,813 --> 01:05:40,146 [music stops] 1398 01:05:47,230 --> 01:05:48,146 [Andy sighing] 1399 01:05:51,730 --> 01:05:53,771 No one's gonna find us in here. 1400 01:05:55,063 --> 01:05:58,230 I don't know, I just feel like God's gonna be mad. 1401 01:05:59,605 --> 01:06:03,188 Nah, God's gonna be stoked that we like each other so much. 1402 01:06:05,105 --> 01:06:05,980 You're right. 1403 01:06:14,230 --> 01:06:17,063 This is not the bathroom! 1404 01:06:17,146 --> 01:06:18,105 [whispering] Oh no. 1405 01:06:18,188 --> 01:06:19,563 [Rebecca] Do you see a toilet?! 1406 01:06:19,646 --> 01:06:21,271 I didn't think so! 1407 01:06:21,938 --> 01:06:23,146 I didn't need to go. 1408 01:06:23,855 --> 01:06:26,063 Well, mazel tov, you guys are married now. 1409 01:06:27,021 --> 01:06:28,646 Kidding, but you're in a lot of trouble. 1410 01:06:29,355 --> 01:06:32,271 In front of the Torah? What were you thinking? 1411 01:06:32,355 --> 01:06:35,188 I said I was sorry. Why is Andy not getting in trouble? 1412 01:06:35,271 --> 01:06:36,271 Oh, he's in trouble! 1413 01:06:36,355 --> 01:06:39,230 He's a repeat offender. We're handling it. 1414 01:06:39,313 --> 01:06:40,688 I hope my father doesn't handle it. 1415 01:06:40,771 --> 01:06:43,230 He'll put him in a wood chipper. They'll never find his body. 1416 01:06:43,313 --> 01:06:44,646 [somber music playing] 1417 01:06:44,730 --> 01:06:49,188 Seema, we're only a few weeks away from your Bat Mitz. Okay, cutie-pops? 1418 01:06:49,271 --> 01:06:51,730 This is supposed to be the most important day of your life, 1419 01:06:51,813 --> 01:06:54,521 and you're not taking it seriously at all. 1420 01:06:54,605 --> 01:06:56,480 You haven't even done your mitzvah project yet. 1421 01:06:56,563 --> 01:06:59,230 I did my mitzvah project. I volunteered at the retirement home. 1422 01:06:59,313 --> 01:07:02,688 So you could do a mitzvah, or so you could flirt with a boy? 1423 01:07:03,563 --> 01:07:04,938 How did you know that? 1424 01:07:05,021 --> 01:07:08,855 Let's just say there's a wonderful woman there, Mrs. O'Leary, 1425 01:07:08,938 --> 01:07:14,313 who wishes to convert to Judaism, and you never brought her bookies! 1426 01:07:15,021 --> 01:07:17,938 Yeah, you're not the only one who's amazing at impressions. 1427 01:07:18,438 --> 01:07:19,438 I'll do better. 1428 01:07:20,271 --> 01:07:24,105 Let me take off my "rabbi hat" for a second 1429 01:07:24,188 --> 01:07:26,521 and put on my "tough love hat." 1430 01:07:28,605 --> 01:07:31,980 If you don't shape up, your Bat Mitzvah is gonna be cancelled, sis. 1431 01:07:32,980 --> 01:07:36,313 And that's the way the hamantaschen crumbles. Capisce? 1432 01:07:45,021 --> 01:07:47,480 Yes, we understand, Rabbi Rebecca. 1433 01:07:47,563 --> 01:07:49,938 She doesn't really even deserve a second chance. 1434 01:07:50,021 --> 01:07:50,980 We thank you for that. 1435 01:07:51,063 --> 01:07:52,146 [Rebecca] Mm-hmm. 1436 01:07:52,230 --> 01:07:56,230 Oh, and just please calm your husband down. 1437 01:07:56,313 --> 01:08:00,563 Okay? Tell him don't put Andy Goldfarb in a wood chipper. 1438 01:08:00,646 --> 01:08:03,230 -[Bree] She just walked in. -[Rebecca] Oh. Okay, good luck. 1439 01:08:05,438 --> 01:08:08,480 Dad, take a breath. Just talk to her. Don't yell. 1440 01:08:10,605 --> 01:08:11,938 [music stops] 1441 01:08:12,855 --> 01:08:14,230 He didn't take a breath. 1442 01:08:14,313 --> 01:08:15,271 No. 1443 01:08:18,896 --> 01:08:19,771 [door opening] 1444 01:08:19,855 --> 01:08:21,771 Hey. We don't slam doors in this house. 1445 01:08:21,855 --> 01:08:24,355 -Dad, I need a break. -[Danny] Well, welcome to being an adult. 1446 01:08:24,438 --> 01:08:26,438 And welcome to being Jewish. We don't get breaks. 1447 01:08:26,521 --> 01:08:27,771 Oh my God! Stop! 1448 01:08:27,855 --> 01:08:29,688 [Danny] Kissing a boy in a temple? 1449 01:08:29,771 --> 01:08:32,021 You know how disrespectful that is? 1450 01:08:32,105 --> 01:08:37,271 Every time you walk into that synagogue, you are declaring to everyone and God, 1451 01:08:37,355 --> 01:08:40,021 "I'm Jewish, and I am part of this!" 1452 01:08:40,105 --> 01:08:41,396 Well, maybe I don't want to be! 1453 01:08:41,480 --> 01:08:42,563 Yes, you do! 1454 01:08:42,646 --> 01:08:44,188 I was born into God's kingdom! 1455 01:08:44,271 --> 01:08:47,230 Yeah? Well, God wants you out right now! How's that? 1456 01:08:47,313 --> 01:08:49,396 -I hate you! -[Danny] You don't mean that. 1457 01:08:49,480 --> 01:08:52,021 Wow, I never said that to him, and I was nuts. 1458 01:08:52,105 --> 01:08:53,688 -[Danny] You hate me?! -[knocking on door] 1459 01:08:53,771 --> 01:08:56,480 [Stacy] I do. You're a jerk, and you won't let me have a mojito bar. 1460 01:08:56,563 --> 01:08:57,396 Gabi! 1461 01:08:57,480 --> 01:08:58,313 Hi! 1462 01:08:58,396 --> 01:09:00,438 [Danny] That's why we fought the Nazis? 1463 01:09:00,521 --> 01:09:02,146 So you could have a mojito bar? 1464 01:09:02,230 --> 01:09:03,521 Is this a bad time? 1465 01:09:03,605 --> 01:09:06,521 -Um, no. What's… what's going on? -[Danny] Are you nuts? 1466 01:09:06,605 --> 01:09:09,146 Well, Stacy was supposed to do that video for Lydia's Bat Mitzvah. 1467 01:09:09,230 --> 01:09:10,605 Oh, yeah, yeah. Of course, right. 1468 01:09:10,688 --> 01:09:12,563 [Stacy] Get out of my room! Stop ruining my life! 1469 01:09:12,646 --> 01:09:14,646 -Anyways-- -[Danny] I paid for this room! 1470 01:09:14,730 --> 01:09:15,605 She never sent it. 1471 01:09:15,688 --> 01:09:18,605 I was in the neighborhood, and thought I'd pop by and see if it was ready. 1472 01:09:18,688 --> 01:09:19,771 -[screaming] -[Danny] Really? 1473 01:09:19,855 --> 01:09:22,605 Oh, hi, Ronnie. Hi, Zaara. How's it going? 1474 01:09:22,688 --> 01:09:24,896 [Danny] Andy Goldfarb? That's who you pick? 1475 01:09:24,980 --> 01:09:26,896 [both] Great! Nice to see you. 1476 01:09:26,980 --> 01:09:28,938 You girls got so big. How's high school? 1477 01:09:29,021 --> 01:09:31,063 [Stacy] You'll be the reason I start doing drugs! 1478 01:09:31,146 --> 01:09:32,271 [Danny] Same here! 1479 01:09:32,355 --> 01:09:33,188 Hard. 1480 01:09:33,271 --> 01:09:34,646 Very, very stressful. 1481 01:09:34,730 --> 01:09:35,688 [Danny] Good God! 1482 01:09:35,771 --> 01:09:39,396 Um, I think that Stacy said she finished the video this weekend, 1483 01:09:39,480 --> 01:09:41,605 so I can just email it to you ASAP. 1484 01:09:41,688 --> 01:09:44,646 Thanks. Lydia keeps talking about how she doesn't wanna have a video anymore. 1485 01:09:44,730 --> 01:09:46,771 -I know she'd regret it. -[Danny] You're on your own! Good luck! 1486 01:09:46,855 --> 01:09:48,188 [Stacy, shouting] I hope you die before Mom! 1487 01:09:48,271 --> 01:09:50,813 -[Danny] I'm taking you with me! -We'll see you. Mazel tov! Bye! 1488 01:09:51,480 --> 01:09:52,646 [tense music playing] 1489 01:09:52,730 --> 01:09:54,730 [Bree sighing] 1490 01:10:03,938 --> 01:10:06,021 [tense music swelling] 1491 01:10:07,855 --> 01:10:11,355 [Danny] Andy Goldfarb is going in the goddamn wood chipper! 1492 01:10:11,438 --> 01:10:12,896 -[keyboard clicking] -Okay. 1493 01:10:12,980 --> 01:10:14,980 ["Now I'm In It" by HAIM playing] 1494 01:10:16,813 --> 01:10:18,355 [Stacy, narrating] Dear God, Stacy here. 1495 01:10:19,771 --> 01:10:23,980 So, as you probably already know, Lydia's Bat Mitzvah is coming up, 1496 01:10:24,063 --> 01:10:26,146 and I really don't know what to do. 1497 01:10:26,688 --> 01:10:28,896 I'm not even sure if she wants me there. 1498 01:10:28,980 --> 01:10:30,938 -[girls laughing] -[kids clamoring] 1499 01:10:33,480 --> 01:10:35,771 [Stacy, continuing] If I was in this situation a month ago, 1500 01:10:35,855 --> 01:10:37,813 I would've asked my friends what to do. 1501 01:10:38,688 --> 01:10:40,355 Hey, look, we're twinning. 1502 01:10:41,688 --> 01:10:42,688 [Megan] Twinning? 1503 01:10:42,771 --> 01:10:44,480 What are we in fourth grade? 1504 01:10:45,188 --> 01:10:47,188 [Stacy, continuing] But the people I'm hanging out with now, 1505 01:10:47,271 --> 01:10:49,480 I don't know if they'd have such good advice. 1506 01:10:49,563 --> 01:10:52,188 [Stacy practicing in Hebrew] et b'ney Moshe-- 1507 01:10:52,271 --> 01:10:53,980 [Stacy, narrating] I've actually been working hard 1508 01:10:54,063 --> 01:10:56,980 because I want to have a good Bat Mitzvah and a good life. 1509 01:10:57,480 --> 01:11:00,396 [continuing in Hebrew] kedushah ha-nasi… 1510 01:11:00,480 --> 01:11:02,896 I don't know how to fix things with Lydia, 1511 01:11:02,980 --> 01:11:04,271 or if I should, 1512 01:11:04,355 --> 01:11:06,021 or if it's even possible. 1513 01:11:06,105 --> 01:11:10,605 [Stacy practicing in Hebrew] al panav ad bo-oh l'dabeyr ito. 1514 01:11:10,688 --> 01:11:11,855 Booyah! 1515 01:11:12,396 --> 01:11:15,021 So I've been focusing on my new mitzvah project. 1516 01:11:15,105 --> 01:11:16,313 ♪ 'Cause now I'm in it ♪ 1517 01:11:16,896 --> 01:11:18,480 ♪ But I've been trying… ♪ 1518 01:11:18,563 --> 01:11:20,855 [Stacy, narrating] And maybe, if I start doing good things… 1519 01:11:20,938 --> 01:11:21,771 I got you. 1520 01:11:21,855 --> 01:11:23,688 …good things will start happening to me. 1521 01:11:26,063 --> 01:11:27,063 [coin clanking] 1522 01:11:29,771 --> 01:11:30,813 Thanks. 1523 01:11:31,605 --> 01:11:34,188 [Stacy, continuing] That's more of a Buddhist concept than a Jewish one, 1524 01:11:34,271 --> 01:11:35,771 but, hey, at this point, I'm-- 1525 01:11:35,855 --> 01:11:36,896 [Schmuley] Friedman? 1526 01:11:37,730 --> 01:11:39,313 What the hell are you doing? 1527 01:11:39,396 --> 01:11:41,105 Your meter was expired. 1528 01:11:41,188 --> 01:11:43,063 Yes, I wanted it to be expired. 1529 01:11:43,146 --> 01:11:45,021 The meter maid is a sexual icon, 1530 01:11:45,105 --> 01:11:47,188 and I wanted a chance to hit on her. 1531 01:11:47,271 --> 01:11:49,771 Now I have to wait 45 minutes! 1532 01:11:49,855 --> 01:11:51,605 You're not supposed to call them meter maids. 1533 01:11:51,688 --> 01:11:53,396 And why are you in a handicapped spot? 1534 01:11:53,980 --> 01:11:55,480 Everybody loves a bad boy. 1535 01:11:56,271 --> 01:11:58,271 Gross. That's a $500 fine. 1536 01:11:58,355 --> 01:11:59,438 Huh? 1537 01:12:08,021 --> 01:12:09,980 [dance music playing on stereo] 1538 01:12:10,063 --> 01:12:12,480 -[tires screeching] -[Schmuley groaning] 1539 01:12:12,563 --> 01:12:13,396 [Stacy gasping] 1540 01:12:15,438 --> 01:12:16,396 What the heck, man? 1541 01:12:17,063 --> 01:12:18,230 It was her fault! 1542 01:12:18,938 --> 01:12:20,730 -[man] Her? -[Schmuley] She did it! 1543 01:12:20,813 --> 01:12:22,146 -[man] We know that kid. -What? 1544 01:12:22,230 --> 01:12:25,063 -She goes out with the basketball guy. -Exactly. 1545 01:12:25,146 --> 01:12:27,188 [car window rolling down] 1546 01:12:35,980 --> 01:12:37,938 [somber music playing] 1547 01:12:38,021 --> 01:12:39,271 [Bree] Stace? 1548 01:12:39,355 --> 01:12:40,813 [footsteps approaching] 1549 01:12:40,896 --> 01:12:41,896 [Bree] Honey? 1550 01:12:43,438 --> 01:12:44,855 Why aren't you ready yet? 1551 01:12:45,813 --> 01:12:47,438 I don't want to go. 1552 01:12:47,521 --> 01:12:48,980 [Bree] Yes, you do. 1553 01:12:49,063 --> 01:12:51,438 This is Lydia's Bat Mitzvah. 1554 01:12:52,355 --> 01:12:54,771 -She doesn't even want me there. -[Bree] Honey. 1555 01:12:54,855 --> 01:12:57,230 I don't know what's happening between you two, 1556 01:12:57,313 --> 01:13:00,355 but I know things must feel really messed up right now. 1557 01:13:00,438 --> 01:13:04,396 I know she hurt you, but I'm sure she misses her best friend. 1558 01:13:06,688 --> 01:13:08,646 You need to make things right. 1559 01:13:12,105 --> 01:13:13,563 -Okay? -[Stacy] Yeah. 1560 01:13:13,646 --> 01:13:16,021 [Bree] Okay, I think you should wear this towel. 1561 01:13:16,105 --> 01:13:18,230 -It's a good accessory. -It's very stylish. 1562 01:13:18,313 --> 01:13:19,563 -Don't you think? -Yeah. 1563 01:13:19,646 --> 01:13:21,146 [contemplative music playing] 1564 01:13:21,230 --> 01:13:22,688 [indistinct chatter] 1565 01:13:24,771 --> 01:13:27,771 Oy! Hey! Hey, slow down! 1566 01:13:27,855 --> 01:13:30,021 -Feel the breeze, Grandma! -Oh my, ah! 1567 01:13:30,105 --> 01:13:32,438 I can see why you fell for him so hard. 1568 01:13:35,730 --> 01:13:37,313 [Bree] You’re wearin' the suit for me, huh? 1569 01:13:37,396 --> 01:13:40,021 -[Danny] Yeah. Lydia gets the suit. -[Bree] Oh, it's for Lydia. 1570 01:13:43,230 --> 01:13:44,771 [Schmuley yelling in Hebrew] 1571 01:13:44,855 --> 01:13:46,813 -[funky song playing] -[Schmuley groaning] 1572 01:13:46,896 --> 01:13:48,855 [indistinct chatter] 1573 01:13:51,021 --> 01:13:52,646 -We love you guys! -Thank you for coming. 1574 01:13:52,730 --> 01:13:54,105 [Bree] Lydia! Look at you! 1575 01:13:54,188 --> 01:13:55,480 Oh my God! 1576 01:13:55,563 --> 01:13:56,980 -This is exquisite! -[inaudible] 1577 01:13:57,605 --> 01:14:00,855 Gabi, you've outdone yourself, girl. Really, it's gorgeous. 1578 01:14:00,938 --> 01:14:02,646 [Gabi] Stacy, I'm so glad you came! 1579 01:14:02,730 --> 01:14:04,938 Lydia said you've been so busy with show choir. 1580 01:14:05,896 --> 01:14:07,396 Yeah, the show's going really great. 1581 01:14:07,480 --> 01:14:08,730 [Gabi] That's exciting. 1582 01:14:08,813 --> 01:14:09,813 Can you girls believe it? 1583 01:14:09,896 --> 01:14:12,605 You've been planning this your whole lives, and it's finally here! 1584 01:14:12,688 --> 01:14:15,938 Uh, well, it's time to get hammered. 1585 01:14:16,021 --> 01:14:16,896 [chuckling] Okay. 1586 01:14:16,980 --> 01:14:18,646 Ooh, maybe he'll pass out. 1587 01:14:18,730 --> 01:14:21,646 You! I saw you today at temple. The Haftarah. 1588 01:14:21,730 --> 01:14:22,938 [smacking lips] Spot on. 1589 01:14:23,021 --> 01:14:25,563 -Thank you, Mr. Friedman. -Lydia, you look so pretty! 1590 01:14:25,646 --> 01:14:26,688 [Lydia] Well, thank you. 1591 01:14:26,771 --> 01:14:30,438 -You got the Twizzlers station? -Yeah, it's back there. I got it for you. 1592 01:14:30,521 --> 01:14:32,188 [girls] Yay! [giggling] 1593 01:14:32,271 --> 01:14:35,105 [sing-songy] Your New York theme is gonna be amazing! 1594 01:14:35,188 --> 01:14:37,188 [in accent] Thank you for coming, madam. 1595 01:14:37,271 --> 01:14:39,396 [in accent] Well, thank you for inviting me. 1596 01:14:39,480 --> 01:14:41,105 [Nikki] Lyd! There you are! 1597 01:14:41,188 --> 01:14:42,688 -[Tara] Hey! -You're up! Come on! 1598 01:14:42,771 --> 01:14:43,938 Ready for your grand entrance? 1599 01:14:44,855 --> 01:14:46,771 [in accent] Come on! Places, cutie-pops. 1600 01:14:46,855 --> 01:14:48,105 [girls giggling] 1601 01:14:48,188 --> 01:14:49,771 -See you after. -That's a good impression. 1602 01:14:49,855 --> 01:14:50,938 [Gabi] See you. Bye, Ronnie! 1603 01:14:51,021 --> 01:14:53,146 -That felt good, huh? -Yeah. 1604 01:14:54,605 --> 01:14:55,480 -Wow! -Wow! 1605 01:14:57,355 --> 01:14:58,980 -[Bree] Hey! -[Danny] Oh, hey! 1606 01:14:59,063 --> 01:15:01,355 We're sitting with the Lamonsoffs. I love it! 1607 01:15:01,438 --> 01:15:02,480 Good to see ya. 1608 01:15:03,605 --> 01:15:05,230 [knocking on door] 1609 01:15:05,313 --> 01:15:06,271 What up? 1610 01:15:06,813 --> 01:15:09,271 [man] You ready, DJ? The party's starting. 1611 01:15:09,355 --> 01:15:13,105 All right, I'll be right there! I'm just getting my mind right! 1612 01:15:16,188 --> 01:15:17,230 [Schmuley sighing] 1613 01:15:18,063 --> 01:15:19,646 It's Schmuley time. 1614 01:15:21,605 --> 01:15:22,688 So let's go. 1615 01:15:24,396 --> 01:15:29,230 All right! Put your hands up in the air like you just don't care, because… 1616 01:15:29,313 --> 01:15:34,271 It is officially Lydia Katz Rodriguez's Bat Mitzvah! 1617 01:15:34,355 --> 01:15:36,646 [all cheering] 1618 01:15:36,730 --> 01:15:39,646 [Schmuley] Woo! Oh yeah, you got it, Grandma! 1619 01:15:39,730 --> 01:15:41,105 [inaudible] 1620 01:15:44,938 --> 01:15:47,855 Yeah, nobody does it like DJ Schmuley, huh? 1621 01:15:47,938 --> 01:15:48,938 I guess. 1622 01:15:49,021 --> 01:15:51,313 ["A Little Bit of Love" by Weezer playing] 1623 01:15:58,480 --> 01:16:00,021 [crowd exclaiming] 1624 01:16:00,730 --> 01:16:03,105 My little sweet baby. 1625 01:16:05,938 --> 01:16:07,063 Bubelah! 1626 01:16:07,146 --> 01:16:08,021 Tatelah! 1627 01:16:08,105 --> 01:16:09,105 Meydelah! 1628 01:16:09,188 --> 01:16:11,521 Shayna punim! 1629 01:16:17,063 --> 01:16:19,896 -Remember that? Kindergarten, first day? -Yeah, yeah. 1630 01:16:19,980 --> 01:16:21,563 Yeah, you took my parking spot. 1631 01:16:22,063 --> 01:16:24,313 Mm-hmm. Not sure that was me, but either way. 1632 01:16:24,396 --> 01:16:25,396 Okay. 1633 01:16:25,480 --> 01:16:27,271 [crowd exclaiming] 1634 01:16:28,480 --> 01:16:30,521 If that was you and a boy, what would you do? 1635 01:16:33,688 --> 01:16:35,063 [all chuckling] 1636 01:16:36,980 --> 01:16:38,980 [tense music playing] 1637 01:16:41,813 --> 01:16:43,855 [Stacy, on video] We're waiting for her to pop a pimple. 1638 01:16:43,938 --> 01:16:45,855 Stace, what's going on? What are you doing? 1639 01:16:46,355 --> 01:16:47,771 [crowd laughing] 1640 01:16:48,938 --> 01:16:49,855 Look at that. 1641 01:16:50,980 --> 01:16:52,521 [Stacy, on video] Why do you always do that? 1642 01:16:52,605 --> 01:16:54,521 Because I like the way my feet smell! 1643 01:16:54,605 --> 01:16:56,063 [Stacy, on video] This isn't normal! 1644 01:16:57,771 --> 01:16:59,855 Schmuley, turn off the video. Please, please, please! 1645 01:16:59,938 --> 01:17:02,813 Schmuley! Turn off the video! 1646 01:17:02,896 --> 01:17:04,855 It's getting big reactions. What's wrong with it? 1647 01:17:04,938 --> 01:17:08,188 It's getting a horrible reaction! Please, just turn it off! 1648 01:17:08,271 --> 01:17:10,313 -[all laughing] -[Tara] She sounds like a lawnmower. 1649 01:17:11,855 --> 01:17:13,313 That was not a snore! 1650 01:17:13,396 --> 01:17:14,855 [girls giggling] 1651 01:17:14,938 --> 01:17:16,771 -[Lydia] What's that smell? -Oh God. 1652 01:17:16,855 --> 01:17:19,063 [Lydia] Kym and Megan and Anya, they suck. 1653 01:17:19,146 --> 01:17:20,438 They're horrible. 1654 01:17:20,521 --> 01:17:24,396 Oh, I want cute, designer stuff, but make sure it's, like, eco-friendly. 1655 01:17:24,480 --> 01:17:26,105 -I'm sorry. -[Lydia] They're very dumb. 1656 01:17:26,188 --> 01:17:27,271 It's kinda true though. 1657 01:17:27,355 --> 01:17:29,230 Shut up! It's not. 1658 01:17:29,313 --> 01:17:31,563 -I got a full booger. -Stop! Erase that right now. Please! 1659 01:17:32,771 --> 01:17:34,355 [Stacy, on video] Her real toes are hairy. 1660 01:17:34,438 --> 01:17:36,855 [Lydia] Remember when that string on my tampon broke? 1661 01:17:36,938 --> 01:17:38,230 I think I peed myself! 1662 01:17:38,313 --> 01:17:39,771 Oh my God. 1663 01:17:39,855 --> 01:17:42,396 Have you ever farted from the front? 1664 01:17:42,480 --> 01:17:43,938 [Stacy, on video] Yeah, like your vajayjay? 1665 01:17:44,021 --> 01:17:45,646 -[Lydia] Want me to show you? -[Stacy] Yes. 1666 01:17:45,730 --> 01:17:46,938 [Lydia] I have to prepare. 1667 01:17:48,813 --> 01:17:50,105 [flatulating] 1668 01:17:50,188 --> 01:17:51,813 [Lydia] I was showing them how to queef. 1669 01:17:51,896 --> 01:17:54,146 [woman] Is that what kids talk about today? 1670 01:17:54,230 --> 01:17:56,396 Tampons and frontal farts? 1671 01:17:56,480 --> 01:17:58,146 You better not show this to anyone. 1672 01:17:58,230 --> 01:17:59,146 Oh my God. 1673 01:17:59,230 --> 01:18:01,271 I swear to God, if you show this to anyone… 1674 01:18:01,355 --> 01:18:03,521 -Schmuley did this? -I… I-- 1675 01:18:03,605 --> 01:18:04,563 Schmuley? 1676 01:18:04,646 --> 01:18:09,063 Thanks for watching, bye! 1677 01:18:12,688 --> 01:18:14,313 -Why would Stacy do that? -I don't know. 1678 01:18:16,188 --> 01:18:17,646 [crowd exclaiming, murmuring] 1679 01:18:19,313 --> 01:18:20,730 Okay, even I'm not that mean. 1680 01:18:20,813 --> 01:18:22,688 -You're pretty mean. -Yeah, you suck. 1681 01:18:39,521 --> 01:18:40,938 Turn it off, turn it off! 1682 01:18:41,021 --> 01:18:43,396 Lydia! Lydia, I didn't mean to-- 1683 01:18:43,480 --> 01:18:45,771 [Lydia] Stop! You didn't mean to? 1684 01:18:45,855 --> 01:18:48,563 Like you didn't mean to tell everyone I had a black hair on my nipple, 1685 01:18:48,646 --> 01:18:49,896 or that Andy was my first kiss? 1686 01:18:49,980 --> 01:18:52,313 -No, but this is different! -Just stop lying, Stacy! 1687 01:18:52,396 --> 01:18:55,021 I have tried to apologize, but you keep punishing me! 1688 01:18:55,105 --> 01:18:57,480 -When is it enough, Stacy? -Now, it's enough! 1689 01:18:57,563 --> 01:18:58,480 It's too late! 1690 01:18:58,980 --> 01:18:59,938 [Gabi] Lydia! 1691 01:19:01,396 --> 01:19:04,063 [“Hang the Moon” by Matthew Bair, Katelyn Tarver, Sadie Sandler playing] 1692 01:19:04,146 --> 01:19:07,855 ♪ I saw us only in the highlights ♪ 1693 01:19:07,938 --> 01:19:09,896 [Stacy crying] 1694 01:19:11,521 --> 01:19:12,605 [Stacy sniffling] 1695 01:19:12,688 --> 01:19:16,021 ♪ A picture of me… ♪ 1696 01:19:16,105 --> 01:19:18,355 I should go up and see her. I gotta talk to her. 1697 01:19:18,438 --> 01:19:20,855 No, I'm the one who sent the damn video. I should go. 1698 01:19:20,938 --> 01:19:24,105 Neither of you guys should go up there. She needs to process this herself. 1699 01:19:24,188 --> 01:19:25,105 No, honey, she needs-- 1700 01:19:25,188 --> 01:19:27,271 I know what she needs 'cause I know how she's feeling. 1701 01:19:27,355 --> 01:19:28,730 How would you know what she's feeling? 1702 01:19:28,813 --> 01:19:31,396 Even your crazy ass never did anything that stupid. 1703 01:19:31,480 --> 01:19:33,730 True, but I've seen some similar TikToks. 1704 01:19:33,813 --> 01:19:36,646 And the "even your crazy ass" was gaslighting. 1705 01:19:37,521 --> 01:19:38,980 Yeah, you're right. Sorry about that. 1706 01:19:39,063 --> 01:19:41,396 This is gonna be difficult for you to hear, Danny and Bree, 1707 01:19:41,480 --> 01:19:42,896 but from this point forward, 1708 01:19:42,980 --> 01:19:46,980 there's going to be a whole huge part of Stacy that you don't understand, 1709 01:19:47,063 --> 01:19:49,980 that you won't ever understand, no matter how much you want to, 1710 01:19:50,063 --> 01:19:51,313 and that's just the way it is. 1711 01:19:52,396 --> 01:19:54,938 Don't ever call us Danny and Bree again, Zaara. 1712 01:19:55,021 --> 01:19:56,146 Yeah, that was weird. 1713 01:19:56,230 --> 01:19:58,480 Sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Friedman. 1714 01:19:59,855 --> 01:20:01,563 To me, that was gaslighting. 1715 01:20:05,063 --> 01:20:09,396 [Stacy, narrating] God, everything is such a mess. 1716 01:20:10,646 --> 01:20:12,688 I've never felt this way before. 1717 01:20:15,563 --> 01:20:18,313 And I don't know how to fix it. 1718 01:20:21,605 --> 01:20:25,396 ♪ When you said it was love Did you mean it? ♪ 1719 01:20:25,896 --> 01:20:29,980 ♪ Or did I make it up? Did I dream it? ♪ 1720 01:20:30,063 --> 01:20:33,980 ♪ For a while I was fooled I believed it ♪ 1721 01:20:34,480 --> 01:20:38,271 ♪ But you can hang the moon ♪ 1722 01:20:42,771 --> 01:20:45,313 ♪ But you can hang the moon ♪ 1723 01:20:45,396 --> 01:20:49,188 [Stacy, narrating] Well, I'm sure you got this day marked in your holy calendar too, 1724 01:20:49,271 --> 01:20:51,355 but today is my Bat Mitzvah. 1725 01:20:51,438 --> 01:20:54,188 The most important day of my Jewish life. 1726 01:20:54,271 --> 01:20:56,438 Maybe even my entire life. 1727 01:20:57,021 --> 01:20:58,563 But what's the point? 1728 01:20:58,646 --> 01:20:59,896 [Bree] Let's do this! 1729 01:21:02,480 --> 01:21:04,230 You're kidding me. Again? 1730 01:21:04,313 --> 01:21:06,480 This time, I'm serious. I am not going. 1731 01:21:06,563 --> 01:21:08,813 Oh, you're going. Get dressed. Get in the car. 1732 01:21:08,896 --> 01:21:10,688 -I can't, and I won't. -[tense music playing] 1733 01:21:10,771 --> 01:21:13,605 Okay, fine. Say goodbye to your phone. 1734 01:21:15,355 --> 01:21:17,230 Fine. Who am I texting anyway? 1735 01:21:19,355 --> 01:21:20,230 [music stops] 1736 01:21:20,730 --> 01:21:24,313 There is nothing you can say or do that will make me go. 1737 01:21:24,980 --> 01:21:27,646 I'm an adult today, and I can make my own decisions, 1738 01:21:27,730 --> 01:21:30,271 and I have decided that I am staying here. 1739 01:21:31,563 --> 01:21:34,230 -[screaming] Put me down, put me down! -[Danny] Hey. Come on. Hey. 1740 01:21:34,313 --> 01:21:36,438 Ronnie! [screaming] 1741 01:21:36,521 --> 01:21:39,230 That is some amazing parenting right there. 1742 01:21:39,313 --> 01:21:41,521 -[Stacy] No! Don't! [screaming] -[Danny] Hey. 1743 01:21:41,605 --> 01:21:43,855 [indistinct chatter] 1744 01:21:46,521 --> 01:21:48,480 Hey, how are those armpits doing? 1745 01:21:48,563 --> 01:21:50,563 You know how they say that it grows back double? 1746 01:21:50,646 --> 01:21:51,855 It's growing back triple. 1747 01:21:51,938 --> 01:21:52,813 Oh. 1748 01:21:52,896 --> 01:21:53,813 Yeah. 1749 01:21:53,896 --> 01:21:55,438 -[Stacy screaming] -[Bree] Pull it together! 1750 01:21:56,063 --> 01:21:57,146 [crowd murmuring] 1751 01:21:57,230 --> 01:21:58,438 [Bree chuckling nervously] 1752 01:21:58,521 --> 01:22:00,563 -[Danny] Calm down. -I don't want to go. 1753 01:22:00,646 --> 01:22:01,688 Can you stop? 1754 01:22:02,605 --> 01:22:03,730 H-hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! 1755 01:22:03,813 --> 01:22:05,896 Shabbat shalom. 1756 01:22:05,980 --> 01:22:07,771 [all] Shabbat shalom. 1757 01:22:07,855 --> 01:22:10,896 Today is a very special day. 1758 01:22:11,396 --> 01:22:14,063 Our brilliant, young Stacy Friedman 1759 01:22:14,146 --> 01:22:17,646 is called to the bimah for her Bat Mitzvah. 1760 01:22:17,730 --> 01:22:18,980 [Stacy, narrating] Oh, God. 1761 01:22:19,063 --> 01:22:22,646 Do you hear her calling me up to receive an honor I do not deserve? 1762 01:22:23,355 --> 01:22:27,271 I've been dreaming about this day my whole life, and now it's here. 1763 01:22:27,355 --> 01:22:31,480 And I wish I could go back in bed, or under my bed, or literally anywhere-- 1764 01:22:31,563 --> 01:22:32,563 [Rebecca] Seema? 1765 01:22:32,646 --> 01:22:34,646 [contemplative music playing] 1766 01:22:44,355 --> 01:22:45,813 [Stacy clearing throat] 1767 01:22:57,480 --> 01:23:00,438 [in Hebrew] Barechu et Adonai hamevorach. 1768 01:23:00,521 --> 01:23:05,105 [crowd in unison] Baruch Adonai hamevorach leolam vaed. 1769 01:23:05,188 --> 01:23:08,105 Baruch Adonai hamevorach leolam vaed. 1770 01:23:08,188 --> 01:23:12,646 Baruch Atah Adonai Eloheinu melech haolam, 1771 01:23:12,730 --> 01:23:15,771 asher bachar banu mikol… 1772 01:23:15,855 --> 01:23:17,313 [Stacy slowing] ha-amim… 1773 01:23:18,563 --> 01:23:19,605 [Stacy sniffling] 1774 01:23:25,813 --> 01:23:28,438 I made a huge mistake. [sniffling] 1775 01:23:29,646 --> 01:23:32,271 I'm sorry. I don't even know what I'm doing up here. 1776 01:23:35,355 --> 01:23:36,355 [guitar ending abruptly] 1777 01:23:37,480 --> 01:23:38,480 [Stacy sniffling] 1778 01:23:39,563 --> 01:23:40,480 [exhaling] 1779 01:23:41,105 --> 01:23:41,938 Uh… 1780 01:23:42,021 --> 01:23:43,563 [emotional music playing] 1781 01:23:43,646 --> 01:23:47,605 In the Jewish religion, I am supposed to be a grown-up today. 1782 01:23:48,896 --> 01:23:55,021 But I have been so selfish and bratty and annoying to my parents who just want… 1783 01:23:55,105 --> 01:23:57,063 [Stacy, narrating] And then, it happened. 1784 01:23:57,146 --> 01:23:59,771 The very day I was supposed to become a woman 1785 01:23:59,855 --> 01:24:01,813 is the day that everything started to make sense. 1786 01:24:01,896 --> 01:24:03,271 …Nikki, Tara… 1787 01:24:03,355 --> 01:24:06,521 When you're a kid, you think it's okay to put yourself in front of your friends 1788 01:24:06,605 --> 01:24:08,396 in pursuit of something better. 1789 01:24:09,021 --> 01:24:11,855 A woman knows there is nothing better than your friends. 1790 01:24:13,355 --> 01:24:14,646 …Kym, Megan, Anya… 1791 01:24:14,730 --> 01:24:15,813 [Stacy, narrating] When you're a kid, 1792 01:24:15,896 --> 01:24:19,271 sometimes you think you have to be someone you're not in order to fit in. 1793 01:24:19,355 --> 01:24:22,896 …if I'm being honest, it's probably 'cause we were, like, jealous or something… 1794 01:24:22,980 --> 01:24:25,480 But a woman knows it's not about hiding who you are. 1795 01:24:25,563 --> 01:24:27,480 It's about being yourself and speaking your truth. 1796 01:24:27,563 --> 01:24:30,855 …but also, you guys can be, like, such a-holes sometimes. 1797 01:24:30,938 --> 01:24:32,146 [crowd gasping] 1798 01:24:32,230 --> 01:24:33,730 Keep it PG in the temple. 1799 01:24:33,813 --> 01:24:34,855 Sorry. 1800 01:24:34,938 --> 01:24:37,271 Where'd she learn to curse like that? 1801 01:24:37,355 --> 01:24:38,396 No idea. 1802 01:24:38,480 --> 01:24:41,605 [Stacy] And the biggest difference between being a kid and an adult… 1803 01:24:41,688 --> 01:24:42,730 Andy… 1804 01:24:43,563 --> 01:24:45,521 …is knowing what really matters. 1805 01:24:46,105 --> 01:24:49,438 I'm gonna keep it brief 'cause I know you can't focus on one thing for that long, 1806 01:24:49,521 --> 01:24:52,605 but you're basic and not nice to people, 1807 01:24:52,688 --> 01:24:55,188 and if I'm being honest, not that good at soccer. 1808 01:24:55,271 --> 01:24:56,563 [kids laughing] 1809 01:24:56,646 --> 01:24:57,646 [Aaron] You suck! 1810 01:24:58,605 --> 01:25:00,646 And worst of all, because of you, 1811 01:25:01,355 --> 01:25:04,813 I ruined my friendship with the one person that matters the most. 1812 01:25:05,730 --> 01:25:07,480 I need to tell her how bad I messed up. 1813 01:25:08,688 --> 01:25:09,730 Hey, hey, hey… 1814 01:25:09,813 --> 01:25:12,230 You gotta go up there and finish your Torah portion before you go. 1815 01:25:12,313 --> 01:25:16,105 Come here. Give it your best shot, and then we'll all fix this together. 1816 01:25:16,188 --> 01:25:18,313 Hopefully, after I take off this itchy suit. 1817 01:25:18,980 --> 01:25:19,855 [Stacy chuckling] 1818 01:25:19,938 --> 01:25:21,105 You have coffee breath. 1819 01:25:21,188 --> 01:25:24,105 Okay. All right. Use that up there. Go. 1820 01:25:24,188 --> 01:25:28,688 Quickly, so quickly, so quickly. 1821 01:25:28,771 --> 01:25:30,396 So quickly. 1822 01:25:31,146 --> 01:25:32,855 [uplifting music playing] 1823 01:25:32,938 --> 01:25:34,855 [Stacy breathing shakily] 1824 01:25:36,771 --> 01:25:40,813 [in Hebrew] Va-y'chal Moshe mi-dabeyr itam 1825 01:25:40,896 --> 01:25:42,896 Va-yiteyn al panav masveh. 1826 01:25:44,188 --> 01:25:48,646 Uv'vo Moshe lifney Adonai l'dabeyr ito 1827 01:25:48,730 --> 01:25:51,105 Ya-sir et ha-masveh ad tzeyto 1828 01:25:51,188 --> 01:25:57,813 V'yatza v'di-ber el b'ney Yisrael et asher y'tzuveh. 1829 01:25:57,896 --> 01:26:02,188 V'ra-u v'ney Yisrael et p'ney Moshe 1830 01:26:02,271 --> 01:26:08,563 Ki karan or p'ney Moshe v'heysheev Moshe 1831 01:26:08,646 --> 01:26:11,396 Et ha-masveh al panav 1832 01:26:11,480 --> 01:26:16,605 ad bo-oh l'dabeyr ito. 1833 01:26:18,063 --> 01:26:18,938 I did it. 1834 01:26:19,563 --> 01:26:21,646 [all cheering] 1835 01:26:21,730 --> 01:26:23,605 Ya'sher koach! Now go! 1836 01:26:23,688 --> 01:26:26,230 ["Reputation" by Radiant Baby playing] 1837 01:27:12,063 --> 01:27:13,146 [Stacy] Lydia! 1838 01:27:13,230 --> 01:27:14,438 [doorbell ringing] 1839 01:27:15,230 --> 01:27:17,063 [panting] Lydia. 1840 01:27:19,063 --> 01:27:19,980 Lydia. 1841 01:27:20,730 --> 01:27:22,105 Lydia, please open-- 1842 01:27:23,855 --> 01:27:24,896 The Andy stuff. 1843 01:27:25,396 --> 01:27:27,521 I know you never hurt me on purpose. 1844 01:27:27,605 --> 01:27:29,646 I should have let you apologize. 1845 01:27:30,355 --> 01:27:33,646 I miss you, and I love you, and I'm sorry. 1846 01:27:33,730 --> 01:27:35,605 I've been a horrible, selfish friend. 1847 01:27:35,688 --> 01:27:37,480 Please, please forgive me. 1848 01:27:40,480 --> 01:27:43,355 Stacy, you ruined my Bat Mitzvah. 1849 01:27:43,438 --> 01:27:45,980 What part of that do you not understand? I don't under-- Like-- 1850 01:27:46,063 --> 01:27:48,105 -I know. -Let me finish. 1851 01:27:48,688 --> 01:27:50,980 That day at the ledge, I told you not to go. 1852 01:27:51,063 --> 01:27:53,063 I told you don't jump. You jumped. 1853 01:27:53,146 --> 01:27:54,855 Then the whole thing ended up being my fault. 1854 01:27:54,938 --> 01:27:56,980 -Then I was the shitty friend? -I'm sorry. 1855 01:27:57,063 --> 01:28:00,688 And I've known you liked Andy for, like, a million years, but guess what, Stacy? 1856 01:28:00,771 --> 01:28:03,438 So has every other girl at our school, including me, 1857 01:28:03,521 --> 01:28:06,563 but I never told you anything because I knew it'd just make you upset. 1858 01:28:06,646 --> 01:28:11,355 And then, when you uninvited me to the day I've been helping you plan forever, 1859 01:28:12,605 --> 01:28:14,313 I dated him to make you mad. 1860 01:28:15,021 --> 01:28:16,230 Until you ruined it. 1861 01:28:17,021 --> 01:28:19,271 Then you ruined your best friend's most important day of her life. 1862 01:28:19,355 --> 01:28:21,063 So, yeah, I'm… I'm done here, Stacy. 1863 01:28:21,146 --> 01:28:22,813 Wait, you're right. 1864 01:28:23,563 --> 01:28:25,105 Yeah, I know. 1865 01:28:25,188 --> 01:28:29,605 Just come to my Bat Mitzvah party tonight. I promise it'll be worth it. Please. 1866 01:28:32,355 --> 01:28:34,021 [dramatic music playing] 1867 01:28:34,980 --> 01:28:36,646 I'm gonna take that as a maybe. 1868 01:28:41,521 --> 01:28:42,480 Hello, again. 1869 01:28:45,605 --> 01:28:48,605 ["Post Humorous" by Gus Dapperton playing] 1870 01:28:48,688 --> 01:28:49,688 Honey? 1871 01:28:50,605 --> 01:28:51,521 Hi, Mom. 1872 01:28:51,605 --> 01:28:53,438 [Bree] Your father called in a lot of favors. 1873 01:28:53,521 --> 01:28:56,188 I think it's gonna work out if she shows up. 1874 01:28:58,396 --> 01:28:59,563 Come on. Let me do it. 1875 01:29:04,355 --> 01:29:07,730 I know tonight's not exactly what you dreamed it would be, 1876 01:29:07,813 --> 01:29:09,271 but I'm really proud of you. 1877 01:29:10,146 --> 01:29:10,980 Okay, go. 1878 01:29:11,063 --> 01:29:12,313 [both smacking lips] 1879 01:29:13,855 --> 01:29:14,730 [Bree] There. 1880 01:29:15,230 --> 01:29:16,230 [objects clattering] 1881 01:29:16,313 --> 01:29:17,938 -[Stacy] Hmm. -Gorgeous. 1882 01:29:18,021 --> 01:29:19,021 [in accent] Thanks, doll. 1883 01:29:19,813 --> 01:29:21,146 [Stacy chuckling] 1884 01:29:21,855 --> 01:29:23,771 -I have something for you. -Okay. 1885 01:29:26,271 --> 01:29:29,396 [Bree] Okay, now, I know you may not like this, but… 1886 01:29:30,813 --> 01:29:32,980 [gasping] Really? 1887 01:29:33,563 --> 01:29:34,563 Thank you! 1888 01:29:35,063 --> 01:29:37,146 [Stacy groaning] 1889 01:29:37,230 --> 01:29:39,105 I think I'm gonna wear sneakers. 1890 01:29:39,188 --> 01:29:41,646 Oh my God, you're a woman. You're a smart woman 1891 01:29:42,271 --> 01:29:43,480 Let's party! 1892 01:29:48,146 --> 01:29:50,146 [crowd cheering] 1893 01:29:50,230 --> 01:29:52,438 [dance music playing] 1894 01:29:52,521 --> 01:29:53,355 [door opening] 1895 01:29:53,855 --> 01:29:54,855 [Bree] Is she here? 1896 01:29:55,730 --> 01:29:57,730 [exhaling] I don't think she's coming. 1897 01:29:57,813 --> 01:29:58,896 Honey, she's gonna come. 1898 01:29:58,980 --> 01:30:00,855 [Schmuley] May I have your attention? 1899 01:30:00,938 --> 01:30:03,605 It's starting. What if she doesn't come? Then everything's pointless. 1900 01:30:03,688 --> 01:30:04,771 [door opening] 1901 01:30:05,605 --> 01:30:06,855 [Danny] It's not pointless. 1902 01:30:06,938 --> 01:30:10,021 -I could've been working on my golf game! -Oh, you're fine. 1903 01:30:10,105 --> 01:30:11,105 You made it. 1904 01:30:12,438 --> 01:30:13,355 I made it. 1905 01:30:14,021 --> 01:30:15,188 Perfect timing. 1906 01:30:15,271 --> 01:30:17,355 Just in time for your grand entrance. 1907 01:30:17,438 --> 01:30:20,105 [Schmuley] Listen guys and girls, ladies and gentlemen… 1908 01:30:20,188 --> 01:30:21,396 No, Lydia… 1909 01:30:21,480 --> 01:30:25,938 Please give a very sweet welcome to your Bat Mitzvah 1910 01:30:27,355 --> 01:30:30,480 Lydia Rodriguez Katz! 1911 01:30:30,563 --> 01:30:31,980 [Stacy] It's time for yours. 1912 01:30:32,938 --> 01:30:34,688 Stacy, what is this? 1913 01:30:35,188 --> 01:30:38,313 You deserve a perfect Bat Mitzvah. One that no one ruins. 1914 01:30:39,063 --> 01:30:41,230 So you gave up your Bat Mitzvah for me? 1915 01:30:43,480 --> 01:30:45,021 Stacy, this was your dream. 1916 01:30:45,105 --> 01:30:46,396 It's our dream. 1917 01:30:46,480 --> 01:30:47,396 Stacy! 1918 01:30:48,688 --> 01:30:51,605 Yeah, Lydia! We love you! 1919 01:30:51,688 --> 01:30:53,021 We love you! 1920 01:30:55,480 --> 01:30:56,563 Go! 1921 01:30:56,646 --> 01:30:58,021 Okay. 1922 01:30:58,105 --> 01:30:59,771 [Stacy] Entrance. Beautiful. 1923 01:31:02,021 --> 01:31:04,396 [Schmuley] Lydia! Lydia! Lydia! 1924 01:31:04,480 --> 01:31:06,063 [crowd] Lydia! 1925 01:31:06,146 --> 01:31:08,188 [Schmuley] Come on, Lydia! 1926 01:31:10,521 --> 01:31:11,688 Go, Lydia! 1927 01:31:13,771 --> 01:31:15,980 [dramatic, uplifting music playing] 1928 01:31:28,480 --> 01:31:33,063 [Schmuley] All right! Make some noise for Lydia and Stacy! 1929 01:31:33,146 --> 01:31:35,063 [crowd cheering] 1930 01:31:35,146 --> 01:31:38,146 -I'm not paying for this, right? -Yeah. You are. 1931 01:31:38,230 --> 01:31:40,730 I'm kidding you. You're good. We got this. 1932 01:31:40,813 --> 01:31:45,646 -[Schmuley] Let's get this party started! -Oh man. 1933 01:31:45,730 --> 01:31:48,188 ["Party of a Lifetime" by Pitbull playing] 1934 01:31:49,521 --> 01:31:51,230 ♪ It's your birthday every day ♪ 1935 01:31:53,355 --> 01:31:54,730 ♪ Every day your birthday ♪ 1936 01:31:54,813 --> 01:31:57,521 ♪ We gon' have a good time, all right ♪ 1937 01:31:58,021 --> 01:32:00,271 [indistinct chatter on phone] 1938 01:32:03,271 --> 01:32:06,521 Guys, you're watching Shawshank Redemp! [chuckling] 1939 01:32:06,605 --> 01:32:09,396 -I love that movie. Have you seen-- -[both] Yeah, we've seen it. 1940 01:32:09,480 --> 01:32:12,355 -Yeah, can you leave us alone? -[both] Bye! 1941 01:32:14,313 --> 01:32:16,313 [dialogue from film playing] 1942 01:32:18,813 --> 01:32:20,438 You're the guy from the movie theater, right? 1943 01:32:20,521 --> 01:32:21,521 I am. 1944 01:32:21,605 --> 01:32:23,146 Let me get some Twizzlers. 1945 01:32:23,646 --> 01:32:25,313 -Yeah, give me a lot. -[man] On it. 1946 01:32:29,980 --> 01:32:31,855 -I just want one. -Okay, my bad. 1947 01:32:31,938 --> 01:32:33,188 Hell's wrong with you? 1948 01:32:35,771 --> 01:32:38,521 All right, mishpachalah! 1949 01:32:38,605 --> 01:32:41,896 Who's ready for some "Don't Stop Believing!"? 1950 01:32:41,980 --> 01:32:43,771 Yeah, let's go! 1951 01:32:45,480 --> 01:32:48,771 Of course you are, nerd, and that's why I'm not going to play it. 1952 01:32:49,355 --> 01:32:52,646 I think it's time to slow things down 1953 01:32:52,730 --> 01:32:56,896 for a little love jam. 1954 01:32:56,980 --> 01:32:59,271 ["Easy" by The Commodores playing] 1955 01:32:59,355 --> 01:33:03,396 ♪ Know it sounds funny But I just can't stand the pain ♪ 1956 01:33:07,021 --> 01:33:11,355 ♪ Girl, I'm leaving you tomorrow ♪ 1957 01:33:13,730 --> 01:33:17,980 ♪ Seems to me, girl You know I've done all I can ♪ 1958 01:33:21,313 --> 01:33:25,521 ♪ You see, I begged, stole And I borrowed ♪ 1959 01:33:26,355 --> 01:33:28,813 ♪ That's why I'm easy ♪ 1960 01:33:32,688 --> 01:33:35,355 ♪ I'm easy like Sunday morning ♪ 1961 01:33:35,438 --> 01:33:36,355 [Mateo] Hey. 1962 01:33:36,938 --> 01:33:38,355 Do you want to dance? 1963 01:33:39,271 --> 01:33:40,980 Well, what about Isabella? 1964 01:33:41,980 --> 01:33:42,896 Who? 1965 01:33:43,563 --> 01:33:45,605 Your 25-year-old girlfriend back in Ecuador? 1966 01:33:45,688 --> 01:33:49,021 I just assumed her name was something glamorous like Isabella. 1967 01:33:49,105 --> 01:33:50,730 I don't have a girlfriend. 1968 01:33:50,813 --> 01:33:53,480 You know, it's a weird rumor I don't understand. 1969 01:33:54,896 --> 01:33:55,730 Oh. 1970 01:33:59,146 --> 01:34:01,355 [gasping] Ooh, how do you feel about that? 1971 01:34:01,438 --> 01:34:03,896 Your daughter's dancing with a handsome young gentleman? 1972 01:34:03,980 --> 01:34:06,813 Um, surprisingly, I feel okay with it. 1973 01:34:06,896 --> 01:34:07,771 Really? 1974 01:34:07,855 --> 01:34:10,438 -You know what I don't feel good with? -What? 1975 01:34:11,021 --> 01:34:13,313 -Rabbi Rebecca and Cantor Jerry. -[Bree gasping] 1976 01:34:13,396 --> 01:34:14,230 [Danny] What is that? 1977 01:34:14,313 --> 01:34:16,146 [Bree] Ooh, work it, Rabbi. 1978 01:34:16,230 --> 01:34:19,313 Yeah. That should be against every religion right there. 1979 01:34:19,396 --> 01:34:21,313 -Yeah. [laughing] -What are they doing? 1980 01:34:24,605 --> 01:34:26,938 Okay, that's enough of the slow stuff. 1981 01:34:27,021 --> 01:34:30,313 -Let's make some noise everybody! -[crowd cheering] 1982 01:34:30,396 --> 01:34:31,646 Are you ready? 1983 01:34:31,730 --> 01:34:33,730 ["Cha Cha Slide" by DJ Casper playing] 1984 01:34:34,813 --> 01:34:36,896 [all clapping rhythmically] 1985 01:34:36,980 --> 01:34:38,105 ♪ Funky ♪ 1986 01:34:39,396 --> 01:34:41,021 ♪ Everybody clap your hands ♪ 1987 01:34:41,105 --> 01:34:43,021 ♪ Everybody clap your hands ♪ 1988 01:34:45,271 --> 01:34:48,271 [Stacy, narrating] Dear God, Stacy Friedman here. 1989 01:34:48,980 --> 01:34:50,646 So today, I'm an adult, 1990 01:34:51,146 --> 01:34:53,230 and honestly, it's wonderful. 1991 01:34:54,521 --> 01:34:57,271 I know this is just the first chapter of my grown-up life, 1992 01:34:57,355 --> 01:34:59,688 and it might not always be this great, 1993 01:34:59,771 --> 01:35:02,105 but if it was, that would also be great. 1994 01:35:02,605 --> 01:35:04,105 I mean, no pressure. 1995 01:35:04,188 --> 01:35:05,980 Not like I could pressure you. 1996 01:35:06,813 --> 01:35:07,771 Just saying. 1997 01:35:07,855 --> 01:35:09,605 [uplifting music playing] 1998 01:35:09,688 --> 01:35:11,563 And I know what you're thinking, 1999 01:35:11,646 --> 01:35:14,688 that giving up my party for Lydia was my mitzvah project. 2000 01:35:16,980 --> 01:35:18,396 But that's not a mitzvah. 2001 01:35:20,188 --> 01:35:21,813 That's just being a best friend. 2002 01:35:22,646 --> 01:35:23,688 [music fades] 2003 01:35:23,771 --> 01:35:24,980 ♪ Yeah, turn it up ♪ 2004 01:35:25,063 --> 01:35:27,063 ["Over You" by HOLYCHILD playing] 2005 01:35:28,480 --> 01:35:31,105 Welcome to Mitzvah Bakery. All proceeds go to charity. 2006 01:35:31,188 --> 01:35:35,188 [Stacy] Helping others, being selfless, taking the bad and making it good… 2007 01:35:35,271 --> 01:35:36,980 -Breadsticks for four dollars. -Four dollars. 2008 01:35:37,063 --> 01:35:38,230 [Stacy] That's a mitzvah. 2009 01:35:39,063 --> 01:35:40,271 [girl] Stacy, you did this? 2010 01:35:40,355 --> 01:35:42,521 -This is so dope. -What are you gonna get? 2011 01:35:42,605 --> 01:35:46,688 [Stacy] Okay, obviously you know that. You're God, which you also know. 2012 01:35:48,105 --> 01:35:49,646 Make sure you say Hamotzi. 2013 01:35:49,730 --> 01:35:52,105 And for one piece, 24 dollars. 2014 01:35:52,188 --> 01:35:53,021 [girl chuckling] 2015 01:35:53,105 --> 01:35:55,146 [Stacy] Anyway, thanks for being patient with me. 2016 01:35:55,230 --> 01:35:56,980 I'm really glad I'm a part of this. 2017 01:35:57,063 --> 01:35:58,730 -Ooh, thank you. -You're welcome. 2018 01:35:58,813 --> 01:36:00,021 You're very, very welcome! 2019 01:36:00,105 --> 01:36:02,438 [Stacy] Okay, I'll get back to you. Selling bread. 2020 01:36:02,521 --> 01:36:04,688 Now we're talking mitzvah! 2021 01:36:04,771 --> 01:36:08,355 ♪ I'm so hopeless and over you ♪ 2022 01:36:08,438 --> 01:36:12,146 ♪ Think that you know it too ♪ 2023 01:36:16,896 --> 01:36:21,730 ♪ I say that it's over ♪ 2024 01:36:22,313 --> 01:36:27,105 ♪ But here I'm still singing ♪ 2025 01:36:27,188 --> 01:36:28,938 ♪ Play me something juicy ♪ 2026 01:36:29,021 --> 01:36:32,063 ["Breakfast for Dinner" by Winnetka Bowling League playing] 2027 01:39:16,730 --> 01:39:17,605 [song fades] 2028 01:39:17,688 --> 01:39:19,688 [upbeat, contemplative music playing] 2029 01:41:32,021 --> 01:41:33,605 [music fades] 146509