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1
00:01:58,560 --> 00:02:02,155
It hurts! Ahh!
2
00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:06,273
- No! So no! - So yeah.
3
00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:11,791
- Yes, yes. - No, it's better not.
4
00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,718
- Yes. - Okay.
5
00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:19,231
- Yes like this! - No. - Yes. - Okay.
6
00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:22,750
Ah! Ouch!
7
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:27,873
Done. Now let's do the position of Kamasutra number 22.
8
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That of the "horny" dentist!
9
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I like!
10
00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:38,193
We start from the front ankle and arrive at the meniscus of the knee.
11
00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:41,710
What beautiful thighs, they are two columns. Why don't you talk?
12
00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:45,833
We arrive at the duodenum. Give me that!
13
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:49,953
Ahh! What beautiful Mississippi mountains.
14
00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:57,673
- What time is it? - 16.35. - Holy shit!
15
00:02:57,800 --> 00:03:02,794
It's late, I have to go. Let me check the other watch.
16
00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:06,710
- It's true. Come down. - No.
17
00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:10,915
Bad teddy bear! I bet you go with another woman!
18
00:03:11,040 --> 00:03:14,635
- What are you saying, my leopard? - Everyone knows you're a womanizer.
19
00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:18,548
- They say you go with five women a day. - Exaggerated, three are enough.
20
00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:21,672
You are worth 20!
21
00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:25,588
Hurry up. I have to go to the station, my son is coming from London.
22
00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:29,713
- I have to get my wife first. - Poor! With a husband like you!
23
00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:34,436
- My wife is delighted! - How is your son?
24
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:39,554
It became gorgeous. In London he will have become a gentleman!
25
00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:43,673
- It looks like you? - In everything! - Even as a boy?
26
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:47,793
There is no two without three in the Patanè family!
27
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,310
- Go. - Too bad it's your son, otherwise I'd give him a "little thought".
28
00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:54,238
You are never satisfied!
29
00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:58,353
- Where do you go? - I'm going home to pick up my wife. - Like this?
30
00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:01,472
Because of you I lose my mind!
31
00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:20,274
- Here you are. - Ahh! Ahh!
32
00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:23,392
Stop crying, Maria!
33
00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:29,314
- Always cries! - How agitated I am!
34
00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:32,830
- Our son is coming today. - You must be cheerful!
35
00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:36,953
- Go give yourself a powder. - I don't know what's wrong with me ...
36
00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:41,119
... I'm so upset!
37
00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:46,633
- Peppino! - What's up? - Hurry to go to the station!
38
00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,194
- Pope! - Hurry up!
39
00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:53,313
- Stop it, dad! - Are you talking to me like that? I am your father!
40
00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:56,477
That train comes from London, not from Barletta, don't wait!
41
00:04:56,600 --> 00:05:00,593
You scream, she cries, there is too much confusion!
42
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:06,508
The more we mess, the more we mess up!
43
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:11,634
Did you put on my hat? You make me lose my mind!
44
00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,752
Ahh! Let's go.
45
00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:18,031
MARIA CRIES It seemed to you!
46
00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:24,350
(loudspeaker) "The rapid from Naples is on its way."
47
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:29,873
"Ln tests the cars arriving from Paris, Brussels and London."
48
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:54,478
We are looking for the first class.
49
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:58,594
Gianluca!
50
00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:04,188
- Gianluca! - What do you want?
51
00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,470
Here.
52
00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:24,038
It must be him! How beautiful, he looks like an English milord!
53
00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:29,154
Gianluca, my son! How beautiful you are, you are taller!
54
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:33,273
There is a misunderstanding. Allows? Aldo Bergonzo, a commercial traveler.
55
00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:37,393
I work for the renowned "Heavenly Journey".
56
00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:40,512
- Tourist agency? - Undertakers.
57
00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:43,632
- At your service. Until we meet again. - Goodbye!
58
00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:56,274
- Stop crying! - Mum! Pope!
59
00:06:56,400 --> 00:07:00,393
- Gianluca! - Where do you go? Who is that? - Our son.
60
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:05,514
- Blessed Madonna! How has it changed! - Mum!
61
00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:12,038
Hello, dad.
62
00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:17,276
(in English) He no longer recognizes me.
63
00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:24,397
- Dad, I'm your son! - Hello. - Pope!
64
00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:29,193
- Good morning, Baroness. - Treats.
65
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:35,110
- Walk. Salutations. - That's Baronet Gianluca.
66
00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:40,234
He came back from London. LAUGH
67
00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:46,748
- See how he's dressed? - Until we meet again.
68
00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:51,273
- Look at the hair! - I'm sending you to London too!
69
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:55,393
- How wonderful! - Beautiful! Salutations.
70
00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:00,788
- The young one is the baroncino? - Studied in London.
71
00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:03,309
To become "ricchione"!
72
00:08:20,280 --> 00:08:24,273
- Welcome back. - Good morning. - How are you? - Fine, thanks.
73
00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:29,394
- Hey! Luggage. - Let me see U. How cute you are!
74
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:34,513
How elegant and beautiful you are!
75
00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:37,872
Gianluca!
76
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:43,393
Grandpa suffers from heartache, if he sees you dressed like this, he dies instantly.
77
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:47,513
- So go to your room and dress like a boy. - Yup.
78
00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:51,633
- Gianluca? - Yup? - This thing here ...
79
00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:55,355
... it is better to take it off. Here you are. Good boy.
80
00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:59,473
- We put this in its place! - What are you doing? You hurt him! - No!
81
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,194
This is a new Chinese method.
82
00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:06,029
(in English) How are you? (in English) Well, thank you.
83
00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:10,153
- It works. I prefer the method of Matilde di Canossa. - Which?
84
00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:14,671
- If it doesn't line straight, I'll break his bones! - How bad you are!
85
00:09:15,560 --> 00:09:19,951
- Shut up, let me. - No! Let yourself be touched. - No!
86
00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:24,073
Stop! You have to be with me for five hours.
87
00:09:24,200 --> 00:09:27,590
What a beautiful ass! Stop, Carmelina!
88
00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:30,314
It says on the employment contract ...
89
00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:33,432
... "washing, ironing and 'tagging'!"
90
00:09:33,560 --> 00:09:37,519
- Stay still! - No. Stop!
91
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:41,633
Come here, I'm horny! Do not you like me anymore?
92
00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:46,959
- Do you like my son Peppino? - No. - Gianluca? Yes you like!
93
00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:52,154
I'm happy, he stays in the family: One tit for me, one for Gianluca.
94
00:09:52,280 --> 00:09:56,068
If you don't need anything else, I'll go to the kitchen to prepare lunch.
95
00:09:56,200 --> 00:10:00,990
Go, cursed servant, but sooner or later you have to come back here!
96
00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:09,316
She likes young meat! He is no longer satisfied with the old!
97
00:10:09,440 --> 00:10:14,434
- Where is he going? - May I come in, sir? > Come in.
98
00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:20,553
Are we already at this point? We are in an advanced state!
99
00:10:20,680 --> 00:10:25,674
My beautiful grandson! Honor yourself, grandpa blood doesn't lie!
100
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:29,793
What are they doing under the cool of the sheets ...
101
00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:31,956
...with this heat?
102
00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:42,672
Well? Have you finished yet?
103
00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:46,190
Do you like the kangaroos of Albania? Five shots and go!
104
00:10:46,320 --> 00:10:50,313
- We did nothing! - Nothing?
105
00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:53,432
By force! You stink! He is a boy ...
106
00:10:53,560 --> 00:10:57,553
... he comes from London, he is used to LONDON who are "bone"!
107
00:10:57,680 --> 00:11:02,071
However, Gianluca, either from London or Budapest, they are always buttocks!
108
00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:05,192
The servant has served me, she must also serve you ...
109
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:10,155
... otherwise what good is it? Now I look at what it does.
110
00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:15,632
What is he doing?
111
00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:18,431
Law.
112
00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:26,999
> Who is it? - I'm the grandfather! > One moment! - Go ahead.
113
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:31,112
> Holy shit!
114
00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:36,633
Instead of "snagging" the servant, look at the pornographic magazines!
115
00:11:36,760 --> 00:11:41,390
Incredible! Evidently the LONDRINI are autarchists ...
116
00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,909
... people "in hand"!
117
00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:51,076
- Finally! - I was busy. - I know it. - Do you need something?
118
00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:55,990
- What do I need? - I do not know. - I have to say it, not you! - Of course.
119
00:11:56,120 --> 00:12:01,717
- I want some water. - That is fine. - Go to the kitchen, Carmelina is here.
120
00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:06,038
- Remember that the servant is needed! - I know ... - Got it?
121
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:09,550
- Okay, but don't shout! - I'm not screaming.
122
00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:18,713
I don't know how they get horny with pornographic magazines!
123
00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:22,833
In my day, females had a little fat on them!
124
00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:25,952
They are all skin and bones now!
125
00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:42,470
Males! Naked males!
126
00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:47,874
So Gianluca is ... "ricchione" ...
127
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:49,991
Gianluca...
128
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:55,911
I feel bad! Madonna, I feel bad ...
129
00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,271
Ahh!
130
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:04,793
- Thanks for signing up. - Until we meet again. - Until we meet again.
131
00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:11,508
- Mr. Notary, why did Dad change his will? - I am sorry.
132
00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:16,634
- We're in the family, he can talk. - I am sorry. - I am the son ...
133
00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:20,355
- I am sorry! - Arrederla, so many sorrows!
134
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:25,474
- Ahh! How's my dad doing? - Accursed wretch!
135
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:29,991
- Do not shout! - Is dead? - No. - Ahh! My dad!
136
00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:35,513
- Now do you remember that you are his daughter? - When the blood calls, I run.
137
00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:40,430
- Mrs. Linda ... - Give me courage! - Mind your own business!
138
00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:44,155
- Why didn't you come earlier? - I was doing ...
139
00:13:44,280 --> 00:13:48,273
- You were doing all the men in the hotel! Do not enter. - Pope!
140
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:52,393
- You stole 120 million for that hotel! - 118!
141
00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:59,039
- You took three times what you were entitled to. - All documentable.
142
00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:03,358
(softly) Peppino. Hey!
143
00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:07,473
- He's calling me. - It is not true. - He said "Peppino".
144
00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:10,592
Dad, your baby doll is here.
145
00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,992
- Pope. - Peppino ... - Dad. - Peppino ...
146
00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:17,599
What's up?
147
00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:29,473
- Do you have a bad ear? - Gianl ...
148
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:34,671
- Gianl ... - How?
149
00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:37,792
I do not understand.
150
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:41,312
- Ricchione! - To me?
151
00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:48,070
Do you want to tell me something? Am I sending you a "rich ..." a priest?
152
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:53,910
It seemed strange! Do you want a girl?
153
00:14:57,040 --> 00:15:01,033
Gianl... Gianl...
154
00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:10,469
Gianl...
155
00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:13,831
Gianl...
156
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:07,272
CRY
157
00:16:10,280 --> 00:16:14,671
- Don Calogero was a gentleman. - Yup!
158
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:18,190
- He knew how to argue about everything. - He died "arguing".
159
00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:23,314
He was telling me something. Excuse me. He spat at me and died.
160
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:58,671
Do you see the baroncino? He's a ricchione!
161
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:00,472
He's a ricchione!
162
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:09,671
- Peppino's son is a ricchione! - Peppino's son is a ricchione.
163
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:15,193
- The baroncino is ricchione. - Peppino's son is a ricchione!
164
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:17,311
Ricchione!
165
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:42,273
Cosimo, Gianluca is rich!
166
00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,392
- Hey! Then? - Nothing.
167
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:51,911
Excuse me, Baron, with interest we have reached 11,111,000 lire.
168
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:57,637
- I seized the candlesticks from the funeral. - It was necessary? - Yup.
169
00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,752
- Until we meet again. - Condolences.
170
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,873
STABLES SOMETHING CRYING
171
00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:21,674
"the undersigned Calogero Patanè, Baron of Martorana ..."
172
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:26,794
"... Knight of Frederick II, Grand Officer of the Garter ..."
173
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:32,517
"... in full possession of my faculties, sane ..."
174
00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:37,031
"... I declare in the presence of the notary ..."
175
00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:41,153
"... Alfonso Brindisi ..." CRIES AND SCREAMS
176
00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:45,273
- Please, lady, calm down. - Shut up, Maria.
177
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:51,193
"I declare in the presence of the notary ..." CRIES AND SCREAMS
178
00:18:51,320 --> 00:18:55,950
Stop it, must declare! You declare, notary.
179
00:18:56,080 --> 00:19:00,471
- One moment, I'll read. - Shall we play poker? I do it "dark"!
180
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:07,597
- Excuse me. - "I declare all my previous wills null and void." - Yup!
181
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:13,317
"And I appoint my son Giuseppe, known as Peppino, my universal heir."
182
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:16,238
- What happiness! - There is a mistake ...
183
00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:19,158
You catch him in that place!
184
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:22,795
- Nothing to me? It's not right. - You spent everything ...
185
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:27,436
... to build the hotel where you receive the men. - The?
186
00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:31,348
So what about you who spent it all?
187
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:35,473
- With women and at play. - At the game yes, I always lose ...
188
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:39,593
... but not with whores! It is not in the nature of the Patanè ...
189
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:43,713
... pay the whores, if anything they pay us!
190
00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:48,834
You all take advantage of it because I ...
191
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:53,954
... I am a poor widow! - Poor widow!
192
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:57,914
Don't listen to her, don't you!
193
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:00,429
Silence, gentlemen!
194
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:04,553
- I still have to read a clause. - There is a clause. - Which?
195
00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:08,070
- Shut up, please. - Yup.
196
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:11,636
"... Giuseppe called Peppino ..." - It's me.
197
00:20:11,760 --> 00:20:14,752
"... on one condition ... - What is it?
198
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:20,876
"... otherwise all the inheritance passes to my daughter Linda ..." -To me!
199
00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:24,993
"... dictates the ..." - Doll!
200
00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:30,638
- "Strozzaminchie", notary public! - What do you say? - It's true!
201
00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:35,151
Do you know why we call it that?
202
00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:38,636
Mr. Notary, do you know why we call you that?
203
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:42,150
- Poor daddy knew that too. - Forget about it!
204
00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:46,273
- Remember the Japanese coachman? - Yes, he had almond eyes!
205
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:50,393
- Remember the French groom? - Yes, he had black eyes!
206
00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:55,514
- And the negro? - He had ... - I know what he had!
207
00:20:55,640 --> 00:21:02,034
- Understood? - "The condition is that my nephew Gianluca ..."
208
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:07,951
"... get married and have a child within exactly one year of my death."
209
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:11,072
"Thus giving proof of virility ..."
210
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:15,079
"... which has always distinguished our family."
211
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:19,193
CRY AND SCREAM Why are you crying? It's funny!
212
00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:23,313
- That's bullshit! - I better cry.
213
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:28,434
- Got it, Gianluca? - Wait a minute, I have to think. - Everything's clear.
214
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:33,554
I was afraid of this condition, but it is stupid!
215
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:39,277
Gianluca is perky. As San Gerardo, protector of billiards said ...
216
00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:42,597
... "with Gianluca's cue every hit goes into the hole!"
217
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:51,874
31! Dear Peppino, you have lost again.
218
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:55,993
- With this they make ... - Two thousand lire? - Two million.
219
00:21:56,120 --> 00:22:00,113
- I can not hear. - Two million! - Don't shout, I'm not deaf!
220
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:03,038
Unfortunate! Two million!
221
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:10,152
- Pss! - Who is?
222
00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:12,669
- Pss! - Ah!
223
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,431
Excuse me.
224
00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:19,519
Signor Peppino, why do you keep playing with Cosimo? It breaks you down!
225
00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:27,236
The interest on the money he owes us has reached 22,222,000 lire.
226
00:22:27,360 --> 00:22:32,150
- I seized the silverware in the house. - The silverware?
227
00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:37,274
- Was it really necessary? - Yes. - Goodbye. - Treats.
228
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:44,073
- He was a friend. - What is 22 million for Don Peppino?
229
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:48,193
Soon Gianluca is getting married and the inheritance is all his!
230
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,313
Speaking of Gianluca, where are we with the wedding?
231
00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:55,238
Have you found the right woman?
232
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:58,750
You know that we are not good-natured in the family.
233
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:01,872
My son is of difficult tastes!
234
00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:05,788
We also say "details"!
235
00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:09,749
In what sense?
236
00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:14,874
- He's not satisfied with just any girl. - No.
237
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:18,276
Maybe he would prefer it with pants!
238
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:23,235
Now my son is getting married to a sergeant of the Bersaglieri!
239
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:30,513
- Carmelina, are there a lot of customers? - I do not know!
240
00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:34,633
You must know, I called you to be an assistant nurse. What do you do?
241
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:39,151
I prepare the walnut sauce for the spaghetti.
242
00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:43,671
I recommend that the dentist's spaghetti be "al dente".
243
00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:48,191
- Why do you use that? - The nutcracker broke.
244
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:53,713
You're using the pliers I use to remove the teeth!
245
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:57,833
You have to be a servant, not a nurse! Go disinfect them.
246
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:01,350
I disinfect them immediately.
247
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:08,551
Do you want them more disinfected? What a fucking family!
248
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:14,073
- Carmelina! Go! - The Baron! - I `ll kill you!
249
00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:18,990
You look! Come on the first. Incredible!
250
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:24,275
- Good morning. - Sit down, lady. - Stuff from the other world!
251
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:27,392
PHONE RINGS
252
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:33,073
- Hello? - I'm Peppino. - Tell me, I'm in a hurry.
253
00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:36,397
- I meant to tell you ... - Hurry up, I'm in a hurry.
254
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:40,513
You are always in a hurry! Sit down and listen.
255
00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:44,633
- That is fine. - You're sitting? You promised to send me ...
256
00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:48,150
... a nurse from the convent of the Incoronata of Foggia.
257
00:24:48,280 --> 00:24:52,671
I don't want her good, but young. Here is my son, there is me ...
258
00:24:52,800 --> 00:24:57,078
... she must help in the study ... I mean, she must have two nice boobs.
259
00:24:57,200 --> 00:25:00,237
- Peppino! - As they say?
260
00:25:00,360 --> 00:25:02,476
God forgives everyone!
261
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,592
Isn't there a girl like that?
262
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:11,274
- I think I have it. - Good! - But I must warn you ...
263
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:16,349
... which had a stormy past and is now undergoing a moral restoration!
264
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:22,396
- How long does it take? - I don't know, I'm in a hurry, we'll talk about it tomorrow.
265
00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:25,239
What do you need to do that is so urgent?
266
00:25:25,360 --> 00:25:29,512
A funeral. If you hold me still, it starts to stink!
267
00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:33,633
- I don't understand, what stinks? - The dead! - Holy shit!
268
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:39,915
- Bye see you. - Peppino, don't scratch! - Hello.
269
00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:44,877
Have you heard? (from the phone) Peppino!
270
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,594
Mom...
271
00:25:48,120 --> 00:25:52,511
- Excuse me, ma'am ... - Happy anniversary, love.
272
00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:55,632
You are crazy?
273
00:25:56,760 --> 00:26:01,151
Today it is three years since we first made love.
274
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:06,070
Why do you always do this? This chair gives me arthrosis.
275
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:11,957
- Are you going to have a filling for me? - I'd make you two or three!
276
00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:15,072
Will you use the drill again today?
277
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:18,590
If you say so you make me horny like an Eskimo kangaroo!
278
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:23,510
- Another time, today I have a thousand thoughts. - What's wrong?
279
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:28,031
- I'm worried about my son. - The fag!
280
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:31,948
Gianluca is a fagot. The whole country knows.
281
00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:34,878
- Fagot? - Yup.
282
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:41,388
So here's why ...
283
00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:48,278
Carmelina! Carmelina!
284
00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:51,790
- Carmelina! - What's up?
285
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:55,708
- Has the mail arrived? - Yes. - Go get it. - Immediately?
286
00:26:55,840 --> 00:26:58,832
No, go there tomorrow! Hurry up, otherwise I'll kill you!
287
00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:04,353
- Peppino, what's going on? - Nothing. - A misfortune? - Perhaps.
288
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:07,472
Don't hide anything from me. I want to know it.
289
00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:11,593
Mind your business, otherwise I'll kill you too!
290
00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:16,510
- Here's the mail. - The mail. Go away!
291
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:19,632
Why so many letters? Is it an anniversary?
292
00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:23,355
- Yes, of the Bersagliere! - Are the Bersaglieri coming here?
293
00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:27,951
Yes, with the mustache and the plume!
294
00:27:29,080 --> 00:27:33,676
This is not, this is not ...
295
00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:43,273
It's this one! Silence! It's this one.
296
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:47,790
"Giuseppe Patanè". It's aimed at me.
297
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:56,068
"Your son is a ricchione". It is directed to Gianluca.
298
00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:59,192
They even did the drawing!
299
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:06,676
So that's true! The anonymous letter is always the only truth!
300
00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:17,196
- Gianluca! - Yes, dad? - Do you know what they say in the village? - No.
301
00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:20,118
- Do you know Grandpa's will? - Yup.
302
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:23,312
- Do you know about the condition? - Yup.
303
00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:27,433
- Don't always say "yes". - No. - Don't say "no". - What do you want me to say?
304
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:32,554
- You have to tell me what you want to do. - I'd like to ... - What?
305
00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:36,673
- The cul ... - What cul? - The cul ...
306
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:40,634
- The bodybuilder. - My Jesus! II bodybuilder!
307
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:48,752
Did you slap me?
308
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:51,872
Carmelina... a me!
309
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,993
He did ... to me!
310
00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:10,633
Our son wants to be a bodybuilder. What an asshole!
311
00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:13,752
Those ricchioni who lift weights!
312
00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:17,270
He didn't have the courage to tell me he likes men!
313
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:21,393
He was going to say "culattone" and at the end he said "bodybuilder".
314
00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:25,513
Sorry, but if you wanted a precise answer ...
315
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:28,632
... why didn't you ask a specific question?
316
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:34,357
But ... I came close to the speech, I tried to convince him ...
317
00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:39,474
I can't say to my son, "I found out you're a fagot."
318
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:46,199
Sorry, what exactly does the word "ricchione" mean?
319
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:50,313
We've been talking about it for two hours!
320
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:56,231
Ricchione is one who loves men more than women.
321
00:29:56,360 --> 00:30:01,354
Then Gianluca is not at all ricchione.
322
00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:05,871
How do you say this?
323
00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:08,594
He has always loved me very much ...
324
00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:11,712
... and her grandmother too, when she was alive.
325
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:17,233
I'm not spitting in your face just because I don't feel like it today.
326
00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:22,354
When I say "females" I mean females with a capital F!
327
00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:27,315
- F like "fuck"! - You mean "whores"!
328
00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:31,433
Yes, even whores. Whores?
329
00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:37,115
You had a great idea! Whores equals whores ...
330
00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:41,233
... whoremonger is the same as cuckold, cuckold like Cosimo ... armory!
331
00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:46,354
- Why do I have to buy cartridges? - Shut up! - The armory is closed.
332
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:51,474
- I organized everything. - Did you get the bidet? - Because?
333
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:55,593
Why do cartridges need ...
334
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,712
- I mean, do you want to go in? - No!
335
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:02,628
Yup! You understand now? Hurry up!
336
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:07,151
Remember I take four cartridges in there at a time!
337
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:13,073
- Pope! - Lia, it's on its way. - Gianluca, come on!
338
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:19,271
Excuse me.
339
00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:27,997
- Did you come to get the cartridges for Daddy's shotgun? - Yup.
340
00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:33,513
There aren't those cartridges here, they're in the house. Will you accompany me?
341
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:38,031
- If you want ... - Give me your hand.
342
00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:42,752
Let's get the cartridges for Dad's shotgun.
343
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:47,237
- You have a shotgun too, right? - No. - Yes, you do!
344
00:31:57,680 --> 00:32:01,673
Take a seat, come here. Come on, don't be nervous.
345
00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:04,792
I am not nervous.
346
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:08,913
Yes you are. Tonight we will load your shotgun too!
347
00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:12,838
Now sit down.
348
00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:15,952
- Here, don't be afraid. - No.
349
00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:24,069
He turned on the light, kicked off. Here we are!
350
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:29,159
- A little whiskey? - No, thanks, I'm a teetotaler.
351
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:34,274
Come on, a drop of whiskey never hurts. In reverse!
352
00:32:35,200 --> 00:32:38,590
You will see that you will feel better afterwards.
353
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:42,713
- Sorry, it's late. I came for the cartridges. - We'll talk about that later.
354
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:46,833
- Dad is waiting for me. - Who cares? Let him wait.
355
00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:51,953
- What have I done to you! - Don't worry, it's nothing.
356
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:56,312
No. It needs to be cleaned, otherwise the stain remains.
357
00:32:56,440 --> 00:33:00,433
First I dry you well here and here.
358
00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:03,791
Don't worry ... it was a mistake.
359
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:07,754
Relax, let me do it.
360
00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:11,471
Bravo.
361
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:16,594
Now let's look for the stain! It's here?
362
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:21,510
He is rich, he is not rich, he is rich, he is not rich ...
363
00:33:23,200 --> 00:33:25,589
This is advanced!
364
00:33:25,720 --> 00:33:28,712
- No thanks. I have to go. - Wait up.
365
00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:31,832
- He has to come away. - I have to go.
366
00:33:37,960 --> 00:33:40,952
This stain does not come.
367
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:43,639
He does not come!
368
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:48,675
He's a fagot, he's not a fagot, so-so ...
369
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:53,191
- I got dirty too. - No, it seems to me not.
370
00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:57,711
Yes, I'm sure. I'm going to change my dress.
371
00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:03,233
Please, do not spy on me while I change.
372
00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:07,831
- Do not worry. - I'm not closing the door, but don't spy on me.
373
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:13,592
The second light came on! There is a penalty kick, make a goal!
374
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:53,068
- You're watching? - No, I don't look.
375
00:34:53,200 --> 00:34:57,398
He is rich, he is not rich, he is rich, he is not rich ...
376
00:34:57,520 --> 00:35:01,274
Rich ... He's a ricchione!
377
00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:05,996
Ah! Here I am!
378
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:10,716
Enough with the games now, baby ...
379
00:35:11,240 --> 00:35:16,951
- The time has come to use your rifle. - No!
380
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:31,474
(sings) "What a great job being a whorehouse!"
381
00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:37,832
"What a great job being a whorehouse."
382
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:43,553
- Heaven! My husband! - No! - Gianluca!
383
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:49,437
- Quick, hide. - Where is it? - On the balcony. - No come on!
384
00:35:49,560 --> 00:35:53,951
- Gianluca! Throw yourself off the balcony. - It's too high!
385
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:58,710
It is not too high. Go for it, the cuckold knows how to shoot very well!
386
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:03,029
Go ahead and hurry.
387
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:05,310
Dai!
388
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:10,272
PHONE RINGS
389
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:13,517
Ready? House of Doctor Baron Patanè.
390
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:18,998
- Peppino, it's me. - Love! Tell me everything about Gianluca.
391
00:36:19,120 --> 00:36:25,355
When Cosimo was entering your son's house, something moved!
392
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:28,472
- What do you mean? - In that sense!
393
00:36:28,600 --> 00:36:33,594
Did he have some kind of "presentat'arm"?
394
00:36:33,720 --> 00:36:37,395
- Are you sure? - Sure, I understand!
395
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:41,911
Yes, you understand! Then I believe it. I'm glad then it's not!
396
00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:46,033
What does it matter if he reacted in the moment of danger!
397
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:48,230
Hello, love, thank you.
398
00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:53,912
- When are you coming to see me? - Soon. - How many cartridges will you buy?
399
00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:59,034
Unfortunate! We pack the cartridges together with you and me!
400
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:03,472
Let's do 12 or 15 ... Let's do two! They are enough. Hello.
401
00:37:06,240 --> 00:37:09,232
Then my son is not a fagot!
402
00:37:09,360 --> 00:37:13,717
(sings) "My son is not a fagot!"
403
00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:18,834
"He's not rich, he's not rich!"
404
00:37:18,960 --> 00:37:23,954
"He's not rich, he's not rich!"
405
00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:29,871
- Peppino! - Who is? - Are you feeling bad? - I'm fine.
406
00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:33,390
I was doing the finale of the opera: "He's not a fagot!"
407
00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:37,513
- I miss the C from the chest! - This letter arrived this morning.
408
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:42,432
- My hand hurts. - Poor thing.
409
00:37:45,560 --> 00:37:48,552
Blessed Madonna!
410
00:37:48,680 --> 00:37:51,752
What happens, Peppino? More misfortunes?
411
00:37:54,280 --> 00:37:56,271
Speak out.
412
00:37:56,400 --> 00:38:01,474
- "Don't worry about 'Gianculino' ..." Got it? - No.
413
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:05,798
You do not understand anything. Don't worry about 'Gianculino' ...
414
00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:09,913
"... maybe your nephew gives birth directly to him. A friend."
415
00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:13,635
- Ahh! I have to let off steam! - Who is this friend?
416
00:38:13,760 --> 00:38:17,753
No man, he's a son of a bitch! I'll kill him!
417
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:21,873
- I do not understand. - I said I'll kill him!
418
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:27,597
You are my wife, if I laugh, you must laugh too. Four laughs ...
419
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,912
VOICE NOT AUDIBLE
420
00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:42,670
ALL SPEAK TOGETHER IN THE APULIAN DIALECT
421
00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:50,272
THEY ALL SPEAK TOGETHER
422
00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:57,392
THEY ALL SPEAK TOGETHER
423
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:05,470
- Did you want to say something? - We wanted to know how Gianluca is.
424
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:08,194
Maybe he is indisposed?
425
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:16,117
Yes, my son is indisposed, he is waiting for his period.
426
00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:20,672
Your whore sister is waiting for the motorcycle!
427
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:23,394
Don't you laugh anymore?
428
00:39:23,520 --> 00:39:29,516
When you come to heal that tooth, I'll break it in three. Country of shit.
429
00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:32,431
Scusi...
430
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:37,878
- Is there anything I can do? - Yup.
431
00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:40,355
Ahh!
432
00:39:40,480 --> 00:39:43,472
Ahh! Ahh!
433
00:39:46,280 --> 00:39:48,271
It hurts!
434
00:39:49,080 --> 00:39:52,868
- What's up? - Who is there? - Nobody. I said "What is it?".
435
00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:55,992
- She said it! - Yes. What do you want to tell me?
436
00:39:56,120 --> 00:40:00,113
Interest reached 33,333,000 lire.
437
00:40:00,240 --> 00:40:04,233
I foreclosed on the furnishings, the sheets and the blankets.
438
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:07,352
- It was necessary? - Yup.
439
00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:10,472
- Goodbye. - Mr. Baron ...
440
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:16,391
You wait ... in the end I'll give you the money with my dick!
441
00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:18,558
Mortacci!
442
00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:25,879
- And she? - No. - Too bad! Look at those boobs and thighs!
443
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:29,390
I mean, are you looking for a nurse or what?
444
00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:33,911
Do you know the inheritance clause? Gianluca must have a son.
445
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:38,033
- But he's not dating anyone. - Are you hoping I'll marry the nurse?
446
00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:41,152
Yes, but it must be a blast, Gianluca has difficult tastes.
447
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:44,670
My God! I don't know if I did well!
448
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:48,190
I also talked to God, he said it's okay!
449
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:50,629
- Yes. - Down!
450
00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:53,149
- And she? - No.
451
00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:56,670
I offer board and lodging but I want her to be a "fan"!
452
00:40:56,800 --> 00:41:00,588
Don't worry, Sonia was a stripper.
453
00:41:00,720 --> 00:41:04,315
- Peppino! - I'm taking this. - No.
454
00:41:05,040 --> 00:41:11,036
This one doesn't come anymore. You could have avoided me coming to the station!
455
00:41:11,160 --> 00:41:15,153
You made me stay here 35 minutes! Fuck off!
456
00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:18,078
Now stop!
457
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:22,193
Excuse me! I was joking with the priest and ...
458
00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:24,311
What's up?
459
00:41:26,440 --> 00:41:33,232
Interest reached 44,444,000 lire.
460
00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:38,753
- Fuck! - I seized the whole library.
461
00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:44,876
- It was necessary? - Yes. - Goodbye.
462
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:47,992
VOICE NOT AUDIBLE
463
00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:50,918
He was a friend of mine ...
464
00:41:51,040 --> 00:41:55,033
- Reverend! - Sonia!
465
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:00,752
The stripper? But how?
466
00:42:01,320 --> 00:42:04,915
- Yes it's her. - But how?
467
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:09,716
BALBETTA That has nothing!
468
00:42:11,920 --> 00:42:15,310
- Are you really the nurse from Foggia? - Yup.
469
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:18,238
Brava, nice and beautiful!
470
00:42:18,360 --> 00:42:23,354
- Good morning. - Good morning. He is the doctor Patanè you will be working with.
471
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:25,471
Pleasure.
472
00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:33,393
- We want to go? - Yup.
473
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:40,309
What do you say?
474
00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:48,035
How can my son get horny with a skinny one?
475
00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:51,152
I expected two tits and two thighs like this ...
476
00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:54,875
... instead it's skin and bones. - Peppino! - I come.
477
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:58,391
Salve.
478
00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:07,509
I do not sleep.
479
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:13,636
How can I sleep? I have too many thoughts in my head!
480
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:21,153
Peppino! Why did you get up so early?
481
00:43:21,280 --> 00:43:24,875
- It's only 7.00. - I'm worried about Gianluca.
482
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:29,994
- Because? What happened? - Don't shout, you annoy me!
483
00:43:30,120 --> 00:43:34,910
You only know how to cry and eat!
484
00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:39,033
I'm worried because everyone in the village teases me.
485
00:43:39,160 --> 00:43:44,154
Yesterday morning an asshole at the bar while I was having an aperitif ...
486
00:43:44,280 --> 00:43:47,670
Darnit! Damn bed, it slips!
487
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:53,674
Everyone teases me. They make me raspberry!
488
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:57,190
Ahh! We also missed the ugly nurse!
489
00:43:57,320 --> 00:44:01,313
She seems very polite to me, I like her a lot.
490
00:44:01,440 --> 00:44:04,432
In fact, I'm worried because she looks like a nun.
491
00:44:04,560 --> 00:44:08,553
I had seen her when she arrived at the station! Why did I get it?
492
00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:12,673
The priest gave us the rip off!
493
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:16,793
- I don't understand you, Peppino. - I understand!
494
00:44:16,920 --> 00:44:19,912
I want proof from Gianluca!
495
00:44:20,040 --> 00:44:24,192
I put one with two tits next to him like this, I want to see what she does!
496
00:44:24,320 --> 00:44:27,710
- Talk to your son. - You piss me off!
497
00:44:27,840 --> 00:44:31,230
I can go to my son and say ...
498
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:36,558
Not a bad idea. You wouldn't think ...
499
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:40,116
... you have some good ideas in that belly!
500
00:44:40,240 --> 00:44:43,835
Do not Cry! Now I go to him and say: "Dear Gianluca ..."
501
00:44:43,960 --> 00:44:48,351
"... you have to get married and have a child, otherwise we lose the inheritance."
502
00:44:48,480 --> 00:44:50,232
Will understand.
503
00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:55,273
In an hour I wake him up and tell him to have breakfast with me.
504
00:44:55,400 --> 00:45:02,192
"Lia said she pulls you. I want to know what kind of woman pulls you ..."
505
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:23,953
You understood! Is that the station nun?
506
00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:27,675
Where did he keep this good of God hidden?
507
00:45:27,800 --> 00:45:31,793
- Dad, what are you doing here? - The? And you?
508
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:36,994
- I look at how he does gymnastics. - It's not gymnastics, it's music ...
509
00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:42,114
... is mandolin. The priest was right: He did the restoration.
510
00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:47,234
As the doctor said to the insane patient, "take off my frock that stands up ..."
511
00:45:47,360 --> 00:45:52,150
- How? - Maybe I should have said "fuck".
512
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:04,393
- See how well he gets on the saddle! - You ride, my son!
513
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:09,116
- Moves well. - Sure, she was a stripper.
514
00:46:09,240 --> 00:46:12,277
It would make an army of castrati horny!
515
00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:16,188
It is really true that the nun does not make the dress! Listens...
516
00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:19,835
- You like? - Yes, it's a nice exercise bike.
517
00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:23,350
I'm talking about the girl, asshole!
518
00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:26,790
Look what beautiful buttocks! I'm the end of the world!
519
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:31,914
- You like? - Yes, I think so. - I knew it!
520
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:36,033
I thought that ... it doesn't matter, I'll explain later.
521
00:46:36,160 --> 00:46:39,357
Good Patanè does not lie!
522
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:41,516
Shh!
523
00:46:41,640 --> 00:46:46,634
- Gianluca, would you marry this one? - Yes, I think yes.
524
00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:52,193
Would you make us a baby right away on your wedding night?
525
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:55,312
- Yes. - Thank you, my son.
526
00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:59,228
Then it's yours. It's decided, it's yours.
527
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:03,353
- How? - It's yours. Come here. - My?
528
00:47:03,480 --> 00:47:08,474
- Let me do it, I'll arrange everything. - Dad, what are you thinking?
529
00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:14,391
Let me do it. We will have a big party, they will also talk about it on TV.
530
00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:18,513
- The important thing is that you have a son! - Male?
531
00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:22,633
Do you want a sissy? Okay, as long as you have a child!
532
00:47:22,760 --> 00:47:27,356
- How you do it? - Should I teach you how to do it?
533
00:47:30,280 --> 00:47:33,272
Take a woman very gently.
534
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:37,393
You caress her, you touch her whole body with your lips ...
535
00:47:37,520 --> 00:47:41,115
... then ... SCREAMS INCOMPRENSIBLE WORDS
536
00:47:41,240 --> 00:47:45,233
- I already knew that. - Then do it, holy shit!
537
00:47:51,280 --> 00:47:56,274
- You are welcome. - Hello. - Walk! Hi beautiful.
538
00:47:56,400 --> 00:48:01,997
Looks like he's going to the guillotine! Now I'm going to clean your teeth.
539
00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:06,113
- You cleaned them for me last month! - I still do.
540
00:48:06,240 --> 00:48:09,232
I make them very white for you!
541
00:48:10,280 --> 00:48:16,833
- Sonia. - Yes, doctor? - Come and clean Gianluca's teeth.
542
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:22,592
- I'm not very practical. - It doesn't matter, he's my son ...
543
00:48:22,720 --> 00:48:27,316
I've never done it, I'm a little scared.
544
00:48:27,440 --> 00:48:33,037
It's easy and Gianluca is good. Come, I'll teach you.
545
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:37,553
Go through here. This tool is very sensitive.
546
00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:40,069
It is very easy.
547
00:48:40,200 --> 00:48:43,192
Here you are. Use it gently.
548
00:48:46,320 --> 00:48:49,312
- Dad ... - Shut up!
549
00:48:49,440 --> 00:48:52,432
Open your eyes wide.
550
00:48:52,560 --> 00:48:55,154
Brava. Chinati.
551
00:48:55,280 --> 00:48:57,874
Your guard!
552
00:48:58,000 --> 00:49:00,992
Look! You're watching?
553
00:49:01,920 --> 00:49:03,353
Me too.
554
00:49:04,760 --> 00:49:07,274
Wake Up! You're watching?
555
00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:12,269
Look at it. She is healing you.
556
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:15,392
- Is that okay? - Agonfie sails!
557
00:49:15,520 --> 00:49:19,798
This is the Frankfurt system: Direct contact with the patient.
558
00:49:19,920 --> 00:49:23,913
- Are you sure ... - Shut up! Keep it going. Good boy!
559
00:49:24,040 --> 00:49:26,110
"Look"!
560
00:49:27,240 --> 00:49:30,437
So, slowly, don't worry. Good boy!
561
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:37,671
- So I can't move well. - It doesn't matter, I'm moving.
562
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:42,191
Just stay close to him. And you stay close to her.
563
00:49:42,320 --> 00:49:46,279
- Stay "stuck"! - Dad, what do we do?
564
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:49,517
- This is the Barletta technique. - Barletta?
565
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:55,590
Yes. "The nose against the tit, the more you have, the more you put!"
566
00:49:56,720 --> 00:49:59,712
Here is the blessing, now you can go.
567
00:50:01,280 --> 00:50:04,477
- Tell me, son. - We're on horseback!
568
00:50:04,600 --> 00:50:08,991
- Peppino! Not even in the confessional do you leave me alone! - Excuse me.
569
00:50:09,120 --> 00:50:14,114
- I said we're on horseback ... - How? - There is no sound!
570
00:50:14,240 --> 00:50:19,837
(aloud) Prepare the wedding. - Did you find a good girl?
571
00:50:19,960 --> 00:50:23,953
It's Sonia! The girl you sent me.
572
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:28,073
It is beautiful and my son is cooked. They will have four children ...
573
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:33,957
... and the inheritance will be mine. - The girl didn't tell me anything.
574
00:50:34,080 --> 00:50:37,152
- He still doesn't know. - How?
575
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:40,272
(aloud) He still doesn't know.
576
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:45,073
- Can you hear me now? - What are you doing? - I can't speak to the grate!
577
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:50,593
- Speak slowly. - You don't know, I decided. Here you come in.
578
00:50:50,720 --> 00:50:53,712
- The? - Ahh! - Shh!
579
00:50:56,240 --> 00:50:58,834
Damn the misery!
580
00:51:01,960 --> 00:51:05,953
- You have to help me. - No. - Yes, yes. - Ninth.
581
00:51:06,080 --> 00:51:09,675
- Do you want to treat your teeth? - Yup.
582
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:15,796
- We've known each other since we were kids, you're like a dad. - Yup!
583
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:21,711
- Inheritance goes to your head. - I'm not doing it for me.
584
00:51:21,840 --> 00:51:25,833
I do it for the balls on the coat of arms and for the honor of the family.
585
00:51:25,960 --> 00:51:29,953
If that doesn't marry my son, I'm screwed!
586
00:51:31,280 --> 00:51:35,876
Don't shed crocodile tears, I don't believe a single word!
587
00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:38,992
Then I'll tell you jokingly. If that doesn't marry my son ...
588
00:51:39,120 --> 00:51:43,113
... I'm screwed. And I'll kill myself. Do I do it in the church next to Jesus?
589
00:51:43,240 --> 00:51:47,028
Peppino! Do you know who Sonia is?
590
00:51:47,160 --> 00:51:51,756
What does it matter to me? I just want you to make me four grandchildren.
591
00:51:51,880 --> 00:51:55,873
Two males and two females. I don't care if she does them for 7 months ...
592
00:51:56,000 --> 00:51:59,993
... the septets are sons of bitches. Screwed! We are one to one.
593
00:52:00,520 --> 00:52:05,514
Sonia ... let's say ... she had a past.
594
00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:09,030
You mean it's a pu ... a peripatetic?
595
00:52:09,160 --> 00:52:14,154
No, but he has had experiences.
596
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:19,673
She has had experiences, he has not, there is the law of compensation.
597
00:52:19,800 --> 00:52:24,032
But she is a good girl, she studied with the nuns ...
598
00:52:24,160 --> 00:52:28,597
... has changed his life and is now looking for a good accommodation.
599
00:52:28,720 --> 00:52:35,512
Modestly, I can offer you ... Ahh!
600
00:52:36,280 --> 00:52:38,271
Tu li hai!
601
00:52:38,400 --> 00:52:42,712
I can offer her accommodation and wealth, but you must help me.
602
00:52:42,840 --> 00:52:47,231
No, for you, no! I will do it only for the happiness of Gianluca!
603
00:52:47,360 --> 00:52:50,352
Thank you. But there is a problem.
604
00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:54,473
I have to tell you the truth. These are all my ideas.
605
00:52:54,600 --> 00:52:58,195
- My son still doesn't know anything. - He does not know?
606
00:52:58,320 --> 00:53:03,110
- Not yet. - What if he doesn't want it? - Does not want?
607
00:53:03,240 --> 00:53:07,233
Do not make me laugh! He can't tell me no, I'm the father!
608
00:53:07,360 --> 00:53:11,558
I break his fifth vertebra and then I spit in his face!
609
00:53:11,680 --> 00:53:12,669
Excuse me.
610
00:53:19,480 --> 00:53:23,075
Peppino, such a hasty engagement with a nurse!
611
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:27,193
- I wanted something more for him. - Let's say she's a doctor!
612
00:53:27,320 --> 00:53:32,713
Now things are done! "ACaporetto capo ha"! Wait up.
613
00:53:38,680 --> 00:53:43,674
- I have to tell you something. - Pope! - Stop this bullshit!
614
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:47,588
- Here in front of everyone? - Yes. Fuck you!
615
00:53:47,720 --> 00:53:51,713
Don't scare me, I'll break your biceps.
616
00:53:55,400 --> 00:53:59,791
- Peppino, we're here, all right. - Does everything have to go wrong?
617
00:53:59,920 --> 00:54:03,913
- You are beautiful! Give me a kiss. - Give your boyfriend a kiss.
618
00:54:06,280 --> 00:54:10,034
- What a pretty girl! - And then they call him ricchione!
619
00:54:12,760 --> 00:54:16,548
We made it, finally! Tiè!
620
00:54:19,680 --> 00:54:23,070
- When its needed its needed. Shall we go to church? - Yup.
621
00:54:23,200 --> 00:54:26,988
After you. See, dear?
622
00:54:28,280 --> 00:54:32,068
- How happy I am! - Why are you always crying?
623
00:54:34,440 --> 00:54:38,433
WEDDING MARCH
624
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:48,551
Cheer!
625
00:54:53,080 --> 00:54:55,878
Here! You take!
626
00:55:02,000 --> 00:55:03,513
You take!
627
00:55:04,880 --> 00:55:06,871
Second!
628
00:55:13,280 --> 00:55:18,070
- Seen? Rice abounds and you are a stranger! - Pig!
629
00:55:18,200 --> 00:55:22,591
- Greetings, my son. Right back at you. - Peppino! - Who is?
630
00:55:22,720 --> 00:55:25,518
Don Cosimo! Thank you.
631
00:55:25,640 --> 00:55:30,031
- Compliments. - When will we meet? - Later.
632
00:55:31,360 --> 00:55:34,352
Dear notary, have you seen? We are in the first act.
633
00:55:34,480 --> 00:55:37,870
Thank you all. Don't always cry!
634
00:55:38,000 --> 00:55:42,994
Interest reached 55,555,000 lire.
635
00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:48,114
I have foreclosed on all the wedding presents.
636
00:55:48,240 --> 00:55:53,234
- It was necessary? - Yes. - Goodbye. Treats to his wife.
637
00:55:53,360 --> 00:55:58,388
- Say hello to your whole family. Exquisite person. - Comets!
638
00:55:58,520 --> 00:56:02,911
- He doesn't look like a fagot! - The ways of the Lord ...
639
00:56:03,040 --> 00:56:05,838
... and those of sex are endless.
640
00:56:05,960 --> 00:56:09,953
- All right for a photo. - A photo!
641
00:56:10,080 --> 00:56:14,437
- Come on. - Squeeze and you spread out.
642
00:56:14,560 --> 00:56:19,554
There are no relatives of the bride, so they are all my relatives!
643
00:56:19,680 --> 00:56:22,592
One moment, I'll put on my hat.
644
00:56:22,720 --> 00:56:26,713
- Widen in the center. - Let's get bigger. Well done.
645
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:30,355
You smile! It is not a funeral, you are the bridegroom!
646
00:56:30,480 --> 00:56:32,471
Ready!
647
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:34,713
Fermi!
648
00:56:37,600 --> 00:56:43,596
- Goodbye, lawyer. - Greetings, Baron. - Until we meet again.
649
00:56:43,720 --> 00:56:47,918
- Dear Engineer. - Good night, Baron.
650
00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:52,433
- Goodbye, notary. - Wonderful party, Baron!
651
00:56:52,560 --> 00:56:55,950
- Thank you. - Congratulations. - Thank you!
652
00:56:56,080 --> 00:56:59,072
Happy fucking, if you don't give me the inheritance right away!
653
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:02,988
The hour has struck! Maria!
654
00:57:03,120 --> 00:57:07,511
MARIA CRIES - Maria! - What happened?
655
00:57:07,640 --> 00:57:11,235
Maria, don't always cry!
656
00:57:11,360 --> 00:57:16,354
- Are the newlyweds in bed? - Yes. - Did you take the tonic? - Yup.
657
00:57:16,480 --> 00:57:20,871
- Did you have the intravenous injection of Gerovital? - Yup.
658
00:57:21,000 --> 00:57:24,993
Stop crying, you have to shut up!
659
00:57:25,120 --> 00:57:29,113
- I'll go check what they do. - Because? - It's our interest.
660
00:57:31,280 --> 00:57:35,671
You have to decide! Either cry or eat!
661
00:57:35,800 --> 00:57:38,792
You cry! At least you don't get fat!
662
00:57:38,920 --> 00:57:42,913
- What's that for? - Shut up! Mind your own business!
663
00:57:43,040 --> 00:57:46,032
Ahh! MARIA CRIES
664
00:57:46,160 --> 00:57:48,151
Shh!
665
00:58:32,280 --> 00:58:35,113
Our daughter-in-law has two boobs!
666
00:58:35,240 --> 00:58:39,233
- Are you tired, Gianluca? - A bit'.
667
00:58:39,360 --> 00:58:43,751
Relax, love.
668
00:58:47,960 --> 00:58:51,350
- Do I like you? - Yup.
669
00:58:52,880 --> 00:58:57,476
- Let's go. - Gianluca does nothing. - He'll be tired, poor thing!
670
00:58:57,600 --> 00:59:01,388
- The first night I made 32. - It was 29!
671
00:59:11,080 --> 00:59:15,278
- Peppino, what happened? - She undressed!
672
00:59:15,400 --> 00:59:18,790
Gianluca! You fell asleep?
673
00:59:18,920 --> 00:59:22,515
Love, look at me!
674
00:59:35,760 --> 00:59:39,070
- Here we are! It's done! - That's good!
675
00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:42,590
- Did Mom tell you anything? - Yup.
676
00:59:42,720 --> 00:59:47,714
(in a drunken voice) He told me a lot of all kinds of things.
677
00:59:47,840 --> 00:59:50,149
You're drunk?
678
00:59:50,280 --> 00:59:52,271
Gianluca!
679
00:59:55,400 --> 01:00:00,155
- Love, come here. What do you have? - I feel sleepy. - Are you afraid of me?
680
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:07,072
- I'm tired and I drank too much. - Let me do it.
681
01:00:07,560 --> 01:00:11,553
- Then? - Nothing. Gianluca is like this ... - He's excited!
682
01:00:11,680 --> 01:00:14,399
Come on! You come!
683
01:00:14,520 --> 01:00:19,310
She's taking him to the bathroom. Wet son, lucky son!
684
01:00:24,840 --> 01:00:28,719
- You will see that you pass the hangover! - Plan!
685
01:01:02,080 --> 01:01:05,072
That's okay ...
686
01:01:16,080 --> 01:01:19,072
- Peppino, what do you want to do? - Silence!
687
01:01:19,200 --> 01:01:21,998
What are you thinking about?
688
01:01:22,120 --> 01:01:27,114
Our son is only aroused by fear. I'll play him a treat!
689
01:01:27,240 --> 01:01:30,232
I think you're going crazy!
690
01:01:32,360 --> 01:01:37,354
SPEECH IN GERMAN BY THE RECORDER
691
01:01:39,280 --> 01:01:44,274
- What are you doing? - I was wrong, damn it!
692
01:01:45,400 --> 01:01:50,394
- Maybe it's the other side. - You're going crazy! - I'm going back now.
693
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:57,110
NOISE OF BOMBING FROM THE RECORDER
694
01:01:57,240 --> 01:02:00,312
- What happen? - Wait up.
695
01:02:00,440 --> 01:02:05,833
No! Just now that I had succeeded!
696
01:02:05,960 --> 01:02:09,748
I'm sorry, can't you hear? Beyond is the war!
697
01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:16,278
- What's up? - Ahh!
698
01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:30,793
IMITATE THE SOUND OF THE TRUMPET
699
01:02:30,920 --> 01:02:34,515
8 million bayonets ...
700
01:02:34,640 --> 01:02:39,031
... they opened the trench ... Ah! The head!
701
01:02:39,160 --> 01:02:42,550
Is the war over? Where am I?
702
01:02:42,680 --> 01:02:44,511
Peppino!
703
01:02:44,640 --> 01:02:48,633
How do you feel, Peppino?
704
01:02:48,760 --> 01:02:52,753
How the head weighs! And how it turns!
705
01:02:52,880 --> 01:02:56,873
- Our son is a wretch! I'll kill him! - Do not panic.
706
01:02:57,000 --> 01:03:00,595
- Calm down. - I'll kill him!
707
01:03:00,720 --> 01:03:04,315
- Do not panic. - I choke him!
708
01:03:04,440 --> 01:03:07,432
She was undressing and he ...
709
01:03:07,560 --> 01:03:11,553
- What a headache! What time is it? - 10.00.
710
01:03:11,680 --> 01:03:17,676
- In the morning? - Yes. - Ah! What a headache! - I believe!
711
01:03:17,800 --> 01:03:23,193
- Have they consumed? - Yes, a coffee.
712
01:03:24,120 --> 01:03:26,111
A coffee!
713
01:03:26,240 --> 01:03:30,631
- I want to know if they did ... - I don't know, I think so.
714
01:03:30,760 --> 01:03:35,151
- Where am I now? - Honeymoon in Capri. They will call.
715
01:03:35,280 --> 01:03:38,750
That's better. I sleep.
716
01:03:38,880 --> 01:03:42,668
- Wake me up in nine months. - Yes. - With a coffee!
717
01:03:47,280 --> 01:03:52,274
- How happy I am! My dear grandchildren! - Auntie!
718
01:03:52,400 --> 01:03:55,790
Here is your aunt! Look what a hypocritical smile!
719
01:03:55,920 --> 01:03:58,912
- It is not his fault! - For real?
720
01:03:59,040 --> 01:04:02,635
So why have we been here for 8 hours and we don't have the room yet?
721
01:04:02,760 --> 01:04:05,513
How are my dear doves?
722
01:04:05,640 --> 01:04:10,031
- Bored, tired and nervous. - Yes, but don't worry ...
723
01:04:10,160 --> 01:04:15,154
... your room is ready. - It was time!
724
01:04:15,280 --> 01:04:19,751
But first there is a nice surprise for you!
725
01:04:19,880 --> 01:04:22,872
- Another one? - Yup!
726
01:04:23,400 --> 01:04:27,791
- Who I am? - Piero!
727
01:04:29,920 --> 01:04:33,913
- I just came from the academy. - What elegance!
728
01:04:34,040 --> 01:04:38,431
Sonia, this is my cousin Piero, Aunt Linda's son.
729
01:04:38,560 --> 01:04:43,554
You are Sonia, Gianluca's wife, so you are my new cousin!
730
01:04:44,600 --> 01:04:46,591
Already!
731
01:04:50,480 --> 01:04:55,474
Sons of bitches, bastards! Why are you angry with my family?
732
01:04:55,600 --> 01:04:58,592
They made him horns!
733
01:04:58,720 --> 01:05:04,716
Already the horns! He's just married! It's that old man's fault!
734
01:05:04,840 --> 01:05:08,833
Today is Tuesday, it's 4pm. They're in Capri, I think.
735
01:05:08,960 --> 01:05:11,952
Hotel Miramare.
736
01:05:12,080 --> 01:05:14,071
There is the sea!
737
01:05:14,200 --> 01:05:20,196
Zero, eight, one, four, three, two, one.
738
01:05:21,320 --> 01:05:26,314
Ready? I am Baron Patanè. Is there my son, the Baroncino?
739
01:05:28,080 --> 01:05:31,470
How? No, you are wrong ...
740
01:05:31,600 --> 01:05:36,594
... I'm on my honeymoon there at the Hotel Miramare!
741
01:05:36,720 --> 01:05:39,712
You don't cry out! Who the fuck does he think he is?
742
01:05:39,840 --> 01:05:44,675
I am Baron Patanè! Go fuck it! It preceded me.
743
01:05:46,880 --> 01:05:50,873
- Maria, someone is betraying us. - What happens?
744
01:05:51,000 --> 01:05:55,994
- The two boys are not in Capri! - No? - I phoned.
745
01:05:56,120 --> 01:06:00,113
- Where am I? - I know nothing. - Do you know something!
746
01:06:00,240 --> 01:06:04,233
I didn't feel like sending them to an unfamiliar place.
747
01:06:04,360 --> 01:06:09,753
- Where am I? - Ataranto, at your sister Linda's hotel!
748
01:06:09,880 --> 01:06:12,235
No! The strozzaminchie!
749
01:06:12,360 --> 01:06:17,150
He insisted so much! He wanted to assist them, take care of their food.
750
01:06:17,280 --> 01:06:21,273
She gives him nothing to eat! Indeed it gives him bromide ...
751
01:06:21,400 --> 01:06:25,188
... so he becomes limp and does not have children. I have to leave!
752
01:06:25,320 --> 01:06:28,710
- Where do you go? - Hunting. - Hunting? - Yup.
753
01:06:28,840 --> 01:06:33,834
- Peppino, don't be crazy! - No, I'm a gentleman.
754
01:06:33,960 --> 01:06:38,670
- I'll kill him! - My Madonna! What a horror!
755
01:06:45,720 --> 01:06:48,518
At the hotel of the strozzaminchie!
756
01:06:48,640 --> 01:06:52,030
She wants the inheritance, who knows what she's done!
757
01:07:03,800 --> 01:07:06,792
PHONE RINGS
758
01:07:09,520 --> 01:07:13,115
- Yup? What's up? - There's Peppino.
759
01:07:13,240 --> 01:07:18,360
- Is Peppino with the gun? - With the rifle?
760
01:07:24,520 --> 01:07:27,910
Here's what the chokehold's plan is: Piero!
761
01:07:28,040 --> 01:07:31,476
If Sonia falls in love with Piero, who does my son have a child with?
762
01:07:33,680 --> 01:07:37,275
Now the days are numbered, there are only nine months left.
763
01:07:37,400 --> 01:07:40,392
The accounts add up and the barons do not proliferate.
764
01:07:43,080 --> 01:07:47,073
He's courting her! As General Famigliulo said ...
765
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:50,636
... "it is urgent to find another ..." I never rhyme!
766
01:07:50,760 --> 01:07:53,752
PHONE RINGS
767
01:07:54,880 --> 01:07:58,270
- Hello? - Lia, it's me. - Who's talking?
768
01:07:58,400 --> 01:08:00,391
I'm Peppino.
769
01:08:00,520 --> 01:08:05,116
Peppino! Did you know that Cosimo has left!
770
01:08:05,240 --> 01:08:08,232
- Are you in the studio? - No, in Taranto.
771
01:08:08,360 --> 01:08:12,353
- Lia, I need you. - Like this? In remote dialing?
772
01:08:12,480 --> 01:08:15,472
Can it be? Tell me how to do it!
773
01:08:15,600 --> 01:08:18,592
He takes the handset and puts himself on top of the token!
774
01:08:18,720 --> 01:08:21,917
I need to see you, it's a matter of life or death!
775
01:08:22,040 --> 01:08:27,034
- Gianluca again! - Unfortunately, yes, but this time it's a different thing.
776
01:08:27,160 --> 01:08:30,152
Lia, if you join me here ...
777
01:08:30,280 --> 01:08:35,274
... let's do the position 78 of the Kamasutra!
778
01:08:35,400 --> 01:08:40,190
- How wonderful! I'll come right away! - I am waiting for you. Hello.
779
01:08:42,880 --> 01:08:47,271
With this stuff the cadet sleeps until Lia arrives.
780
01:08:47,400 --> 01:08:51,871
- Pope! - Auntie dear! - Salutations!
781
01:08:52,000 --> 01:08:54,992
I have a little itch. He how are you?
782
01:08:55,120 --> 01:08:59,159
Get down, otherwise how do I kiss you? Hello.
783
01:08:59,280 --> 01:09:02,078
Accomodatevi.
784
01:09:02,200 --> 01:09:05,192
- Today is a beautiful day! - Yup.
785
01:09:05,320 --> 01:09:10,713
- Dad, it's not what you think. - For heaven's sake, I didn't say anything!
786
01:09:10,840 --> 01:09:14,833
- You won't think ... - Don't worry, I'm a 'sailed' man!
787
01:09:14,960 --> 01:09:18,953
I do not care! We drink. Let's celebrate your license.
788
01:09:19,080 --> 01:09:23,073
- Take this, there's more gin. - No, I want this.
789
01:09:23,200 --> 01:09:26,988
Take this, it's more alcoholic.
790
01:09:27,120 --> 01:09:30,908
- I want this. - Take this, it's better.
791
01:09:31,040 --> 01:09:34,430
This to you and this to me.
792
01:09:34,560 --> 01:09:37,358
Drink! You are young.
793
01:09:41,680 --> 01:09:46,674
Good? Drink it all out of one breath like me!
794
01:09:48,400 --> 01:09:50,311
Drink!
795
01:09:57,400 --> 01:09:58,913
That is fine?
796
01:10:03,280 --> 01:10:06,033
- How do you feel? - Very well!
797
01:10:07,080 --> 01:10:11,676
Is nice! Tall and slender, I like it!
798
01:10:14,200 --> 01:10:19,797
- Are you sleepy? - Not me and you? - No, not at this time!
799
01:10:24,520 --> 01:10:28,035
- Are you OK? - Yes, but why do you keep asking me?
800
01:10:28,160 --> 01:10:31,152
Since you took a bath ...
801
01:10:39,080 --> 01:10:41,230
It makes me laugh!
802
01:10:44,080 --> 01:10:46,878
I don't even want to think about it!
803
01:10:47,000 --> 01:10:49,992
Maybe I got confused and I ...
804
01:10:50,120 --> 01:10:52,509
I risked dying!
805
01:11:02,000 --> 01:11:04,992
I am expected by Mr. Patanè, I am Mrs. Mancuso.
806
01:11:05,120 --> 01:11:09,113
Mrs Mancuso! PHONE RINGS
807
01:11:10,040 --> 01:11:14,909
- Hello? What's up? - Mrs. Mancuso is in the hall.
808
01:11:15,040 --> 01:11:19,750
- Mrs. Mancuso is here! - My wife?
809
01:11:19,880 --> 01:11:24,476
Is there much to wait? I want to speak to Mr. Patanè.
810
01:11:24,600 --> 01:11:29,037
I'll pass Baron Patanè straight away.
811
01:11:29,160 --> 01:11:32,152
PHONE RINGS
812
01:11:32,280 --> 01:11:37,274
- What is that? - The phone. - How long have I slept? - Two hours.
813
01:11:37,400 --> 01:11:41,393
- No, I answer. - Hello?
814
01:11:41,520 --> 01:11:45,798
- Who is? - Dear, I'm here waiting for you. - Who are you?
815
01:11:45,920 --> 01:11:49,913
- Lia, dear. - Lia!
816
01:11:50,040 --> 01:11:54,079
- The engineer. - Say, engineer.
817
01:11:54,200 --> 01:11:59,274
You made me come here to "zig zag"!
818
01:11:59,400 --> 01:12:03,188
Zig Zag? We have to build a zigzag road.
819
01:12:03,320 --> 01:12:06,835
- I'm going up. - I'm coming down. - No, I'll go up!
820
01:12:06,960 --> 01:12:12,956
No, don't go up! I am in my son's room he has to do ...
821
01:12:13,080 --> 01:12:15,071
See you.
822
01:12:15,200 --> 01:12:17,589
He is the engineer.
823
01:12:17,720 --> 01:12:21,713
- We have to build a thing ... - All right, Dad, goodbye.
824
01:12:21,840 --> 01:12:27,233
Goodbye? See you soon. Do you think I'm sleeping?
825
01:12:27,360 --> 01:12:30,352
YAWAY Don't move.
826
01:12:30,480 --> 01:12:32,789
This does not move!
827
01:12:37,360 --> 01:12:40,352
NOISE OF CRACKING SHOES
828
01:12:40,480 --> 01:12:44,871
Cuckold shoes. Then it's Cosimo! Blessed Madonna!
829
01:12:58,480 --> 01:13:02,473
The cornutone! He followed Lia. That shoots!
830
01:13:03,200 --> 01:13:05,794
Damn the bitch!
831
01:13:07,200 --> 01:13:12,194
If the mountain doesn't go to Mohammed ... I'll go to Peppino!
832
01:13:20,280 --> 01:13:23,272
Lia! Lia!
833
01:13:23,400 --> 01:13:26,710
Lia, where are you? There's your husband, he shoots us both!
834
01:13:26,840 --> 01:13:30,549
- Where is Peppino? - He woke up and went to the lobby.
835
01:13:30,680 --> 01:13:31,954
No!
836
01:13:35,480 --> 01:13:36,595
No!
837
01:13:36,720 --> 01:13:40,110
- Why not? - Sonia ...
838
01:13:40,240 --> 01:13:44,233
- Have you seen Peppino? - He's gone! - Excuse me.
839
01:13:45,360 --> 01:13:48,352
Do we want to consummate this marriage?
840
01:13:48,480 --> 01:13:50,072
Yup.
841
01:13:53,200 --> 01:13:58,194
- Sorry, have you seen Peppino? - He got out. - Excuse me.
842
01:14:03,280 --> 01:14:09,071
- Um! Have you seen Linda? - It's gone down. - Excuse me.
843
01:14:14,280 --> 01:14:19,274
- Have you seen Linda, Piero, Lia and Cosimo? - Yes, they got out!
844
01:14:19,400 --> 01:14:22,392
- Do not get mad! - Learn to knock on the door!
845
01:14:23,320 --> 01:14:26,312
Because?
846
01:14:26,440 --> 01:14:31,434
Why does everyone have to piss me off right now?
847
01:14:31,560 --> 01:14:34,552
Dear Gianluca, I'm really annoyed!
848
01:14:35,560 --> 01:14:38,950
Song: "Wife is better in white, lover is better peppered ...
849
01:14:39,080 --> 01:14:44,029
"... and the husband is cooked with garlic, oil and turnip greens."
850
01:14:44,160 --> 01:14:47,948
"Lunch is delicious, the taste is delicate ..."
851
01:14:48,080 --> 01:14:51,675
"... you will be a little cuckold but you are not beaten anymore."
852
01:14:51,800 --> 01:14:53,392
Ahh!
853
01:15:00,280 --> 01:15:04,273
"He calls you 'cicciolino', 'darling', 'pacioccone' ..."
854
01:15:04,400 --> 01:15:08,188
"... but with the beautiful friend then he burns you in a cauldron."
855
01:15:08,320 --> 01:15:09,753
Oh mama!
856
01:15:09,880 --> 01:15:12,872
"Your friend is nice, your wife is beautiful too."
857
01:15:13,000 --> 01:15:17,232
"With her eyes she undresses it and then she gets cravings."
858
01:15:19,760 --> 01:15:22,752
They touch me! Is busy.
859
01:15:30,280 --> 01:15:35,070
- Always stay in the middle, damn! - Strozzaminchie!
860
01:15:35,200 --> 01:15:37,236
What do I do with these madmen?
861
01:15:37,360 --> 01:15:41,478
- Do not touch me. - Who touches you! - You disgust me! - You too.
862
01:15:41,600 --> 01:15:44,592
It is really hard to be a wife!
863
01:15:45,040 --> 01:15:49,830
But I'll make it! In spite of everyone!
864
01:15:53,960 --> 01:15:56,952
- Now enough, I'm bored! - Sonia!
865
01:15:57,080 --> 01:16:00,470
I'll fix everything, you don't worry.
866
01:16:14,000 --> 01:16:16,992
- Sonia. - Here's the first.
867
01:16:17,120 --> 01:16:20,510
- I was waiting for you. - 322!
868
01:16:20,640 --> 01:16:23,757
- What? - Room 322.
869
01:16:24,080 --> 01:16:27,072
- Room 322. - Leave me.
870
01:16:27,200 --> 01:16:33,196
- After you! Room 322. - What am I going to do there?
871
01:16:39,280 --> 01:16:42,192
- Halt! - You are welcome? - Room 321.
872
01:16:42,320 --> 01:16:46,313
- But ... - I said room 321!
873
01:16:46,440 --> 01:16:50,433
- Because? - There's a surprise for you.
874
01:16:50,560 --> 01:16:54,348
Stanza 321!
875
01:16:59,880 --> 01:17:03,668
- Sonia! - She too!
876
01:17:03,800 --> 01:17:07,793
- Mum! - Sonia, what a joy!
877
01:17:07,920 --> 01:17:13,916
- How is Gianluca? Ate? - Yes. - Have you slept? - All time!
878
01:17:14,040 --> 01:17:17,635
- Now where? - Room 321.
879
01:17:17,760 --> 01:17:21,548
I go to my baby. Hello.
880
01:17:25,080 --> 01:17:28,675
- No! Please don't push me! - Come on!
881
01:17:28,800 --> 01:17:34,716
- What do you want to do? - Don't leave the room!
882
01:17:35,280 --> 01:17:39,671
- Get your hands off me! - Come in! - Do I have to go in?
883
01:17:39,800 --> 01:17:42,394
- I enter. - Come in!
884
01:17:45,480 --> 01:17:49,268
And what if some mess happens?
885
01:17:52,760 --> 01:17:55,558
To us two, Gianluca!
886
01:17:55,680 --> 01:17:59,275
"Come in and stay there." And I'm here!
887
01:18:02,280 --> 01:18:05,272
COUGH SHOTS
888
01:18:09,080 --> 01:18:13,073
What a strange cat! Kitty, kitty ... COUGH SHOT
889
01:18:18,200 --> 01:18:21,192
COUGH SHOT Here is the cat!
890
01:18:21,320 --> 01:18:25,711
> Who is it? - I'm Baron Patanè. My daughter-in-law forced me ...
891
01:18:26,840 --> 01:18:29,638
- Strozzaminchie! - Whorehouse!
892
01:18:29,760 --> 01:18:32,752
- Unfortunate! What did you do to my son? - The?
893
01:18:32,880 --> 01:18:36,873
- You gave him bromide so he can't do it! - The?
894
01:18:37,000 --> 01:18:39,992
You are the father of a ricchione!
895
01:18:40,120 --> 01:18:45,148
You sent your son because you don't want my son to have a baby.
896
01:18:49,280 --> 01:18:51,953
This is Don Peppino's rifle.
897
01:18:52,080 --> 01:18:56,073
- Monster! Monster! - I'm your!
898
01:18:56,800 --> 01:19:00,588
Strozzaminchie! Strozzaminchie!
899
01:19:01,120 --> 01:19:04,715
Little monster! Little monster!
900
01:19:04,840 --> 01:19:09,436
Strozzaminchiette! Strozzaminchiette!
901
01:19:09,560 --> 01:19:13,553
Show it off! Show it off!
902
01:19:13,960 --> 01:19:18,670
- Strozzaminchione! Strozzaminchione! - Load!
903
01:19:27,200 --> 01:19:30,192
Now I really want to have fun!
904
01:19:31,520 --> 01:19:35,718
- Heaven! My husband! - Don Peppino!
905
01:19:35,840 --> 01:19:39,833
URLACONFUSE
906
01:19:44,240 --> 01:19:46,913
- Strozzaminchie! - Then I'll choke you!
907
01:19:47,040 --> 01:19:49,759
Ahh!
908
01:19:53,520 --> 01:19:56,478
- Shall we go for it? - Yes, let's go!
909
01:19:56,600 --> 01:19:59,239
- I'll throw you downstairs. - I do it by myself.
910
01:20:02,840 --> 01:20:05,798
- Do you think I'm afraid? - Ahh!
911
01:20:19,680 --> 01:20:21,477
Who are you?
912
01:20:21,600 --> 01:20:25,593
You two were together, wretches!
913
01:20:28,520 --> 01:20:31,512
All your fault, unfortunate stranger!
914
01:20:31,640 --> 01:20:34,154
Maria, come here, I'll eat you!
915
01:20:35,720 --> 01:20:38,712
URLACONFUSE
916
01:21:08,880 --> 01:21:13,874
- Gianluca! - It happens to me when I get scared.
917
01:22:19,480 --> 01:22:22,278
What do you want to call it?
918
01:22:22,400 --> 01:22:25,198
Calogero, Giuseppe, Maria, Federico.
919
01:22:25,320 --> 01:22:29,916
I baptize you with the name of Calogero, Giuseppe, Maria, Federico.
920
01:22:30,040 --> 01:22:33,032
Just Calogero and Giuseppe, or rather Peppino.
921
01:22:37,680 --> 01:22:42,879
I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.
922
01:22:43,000 --> 01:22:46,993
MARIA CRIES Hey! Is working.
923
01:22:48,520 --> 01:22:53,514
Hurry up. Here, the ceremony is over.
924
01:22:54,280 --> 01:22:56,271
Dammelo.
925
01:22:58,400 --> 01:23:02,188
- How cute! - Here is Calogerino!
926
01:23:02,320 --> 01:23:06,313
- Beautiful! - Stay still! You scare him.
927
01:23:06,440 --> 01:23:10,228
- Your father is really unpleasant. - This is Uncle Cosimo ...
928
01:23:10,360 --> 01:23:13,352
... that I always give money to shooting range.
929
01:23:13,480 --> 01:23:17,075
He is holding a candle, luckily not the rifle!
930
01:23:17,480 --> 01:23:21,473
- It's all his grandfather. - He also has a mustache!
931
01:23:21,600 --> 01:23:24,592
Here is your little cousin Piero ...
932
01:23:24,720 --> 01:23:28,508
He is a cadet and wants to be the wives of others.
933
01:23:28,640 --> 01:23:31,632
This is Aunt Linda.
934
01:23:32,760 --> 01:23:35,752
Make Aunt Linda a parnacchietta. He doesn't know how to do it.
935
01:23:35,880 --> 01:23:37,871
I do it.
936
01:23:38,000 --> 01:23:40,992
Mr. Notary, have you seen?
937
01:23:41,120 --> 01:23:43,918
Look here, it's male!
938
01:23:44,040 --> 01:23:48,716
Now let's go to the population that awaits us. Calogero, the people.
939
01:23:52,080 --> 01:23:55,072
Calogerino, "the people".
940
01:23:56,080 --> 01:23:59,072
Here they are!
941
01:24:01,680 --> 01:24:06,151
- Hurray! - Make another one now!
942
01:24:06,280 --> 01:24:09,670
It's difficult! My son doesn't repeat, he's like Paganini!
943
01:24:17,280 --> 01:24:19,555
"Thank you."
944
01:24:21,480 --> 01:24:24,472
Mr. Catafalco! Can you hear me?
945
01:24:25,480 --> 01:24:29,075
I want to tell you something. Sorry, here.
946
01:24:31,200 --> 01:24:33,191
Third!
947
01:24:33,640 --> 01:24:36,632
What a satisfaction!
948
01:24:43,280 --> 01:24:48,479
Italians, citizens, fellow villagers near and far ...
949
01:24:48,600 --> 01:24:52,991
... I have to tell you something important. Today I got rich! That is...
950
01:24:53,120 --> 01:24:57,910
... my family has been enriched by another male: Calogero Patanè.
951
01:24:58,040 --> 01:25:01,032
Which cheered us on to another male member.
952
01:25:01,160 --> 01:25:06,154
And when I say "member" I mean the true sense of the word!
953
01:25:06,280 --> 01:25:09,875
Without subterfuge. Reality: Male!
954
01:25:10,000 --> 01:25:12,468
Now another good news.
955
01:25:12,600 --> 01:25:16,991
Dear girls aged 13 to 70, be careful!
956
01:25:17,120 --> 01:25:20,510
Calogerino is not joking, he took from his grandfather!
957
01:25:20,640 --> 01:25:23,632
He will also follow the family tradition.
958
01:25:23,760 --> 01:25:26,672
As the great poet said in canticle thirty-three ...
959
01:25:26,800 --> 01:25:30,793
... no woman has ever gone blank with a Patanè.
960
01:25:37,520 --> 01:25:42,514
Men and women of little faith, poets, authors and writers ...
961
01:25:42,640 --> 01:25:47,873
... especially those of anonymous letters, sons of bitches ...
962
01:25:48,000 --> 01:25:53,074
... remember that the Patanè do not make fun of themselves. Who do it...
963
01:25:53,200 --> 01:25:57,318
... must go through a lot of trouble. Calogerino is male ...
964
01:25:57,440 --> 01:26:00,796
... like all Patanè in direct line.
965
01:26:12,280 --> 01:26:15,670
Pissing on grandpa's face brings good luck!
79374
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