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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 6 00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:06,660 In case you weren't there, I gotta tell ya, 7 00:00:06,661 --> 00:00:10,394 last Saturday night at Babylon was... 8 00:00:10,395 --> 00:00:12,528 to die for. 9 00:00:17,396 --> 00:00:21,030 Would somebody please say something? 10 00:00:22,730 --> 00:00:24,796 Okay. 11 00:00:24,797 --> 00:00:27,430 So it's late, and I'm leaving Babylon, 12 00:00:27,431 --> 00:00:29,630 and there's this really hot guy. 13 00:00:29,631 --> 00:00:32,530 [Dance music] 14 00:00:32,531 --> 00:00:39,598 ♪ ♪ 15 00:00:39,599 --> 00:00:43,432 And he's, like, perfect. 16 00:00:43,433 --> 00:00:44,666 How perfect? 17 00:00:44,667 --> 00:00:46,966 Perfect. 18 00:00:46,967 --> 00:00:49,967 And we end up... At my place. 19 00:00:49,968 --> 00:00:52,401 So I work with emotionally disturbed kids, 20 00:00:52,402 --> 00:00:54,768 and I really love it. 21 00:00:54,769 --> 00:00:58,568 And I'm the captain of the gay water polo team. 22 00:00:58,569 --> 00:01:01,069 You're really well-rounded. 23 00:01:01,070 --> 00:01:03,503 So we're making out, 24 00:01:03,504 --> 00:01:05,536 and in my mind, I'm picturing him in a Speedo 25 00:01:05,537 --> 00:01:07,604 with the flag on it. 26 00:01:09,471 --> 00:01:10,870 Say, have you ever been to Brazil? 27 00:01:10,871 --> 00:01:12,871 Um, no. Have you? 28 00:01:12,872 --> 00:01:15,804 I just came back. It's fabulous. 29 00:01:15,805 --> 00:01:17,505 Great beaches, I hear. 30 00:01:17,506 --> 00:01:18,672 Yeah. 31 00:01:18,673 --> 00:01:20,505 Only, they have these things. 32 00:01:20,506 --> 00:01:21,905 Things? 33 00:01:21,906 --> 00:01:24,406 Uh, parasite things. 34 00:01:24,407 --> 00:01:26,906 They live in the sand, and they sort of... 35 00:01:26,907 --> 00:01:29,940 Burrow themselves right up in there. 36 00:01:29,941 --> 00:01:31,607 He had them... 37 00:01:31,608 --> 00:01:35,408 Brazilian beach parasites in his ass. 38 00:01:35,409 --> 00:01:37,574 Oh, God! [Laughs] 39 00:01:37,575 --> 00:01:39,309 Well, at least you found out before you got too far. 40 00:01:39,310 --> 00:01:40,708 [Shudders] 41 00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:41,841 What about you? 42 00:01:41,842 --> 00:01:44,842 We were just getting started. 43 00:01:44,843 --> 00:01:47,710 [Techno music] 44 00:01:47,711 --> 00:01:50,376 I feel like a 1991 Madonna video. 45 00:01:50,377 --> 00:01:51,944 Um, do you have this in a size larger? 46 00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:54,577 Can we hurry this along? 47 00:01:54,578 --> 00:01:56,311 I've got a bride and groom to do in the morning. 48 00:01:56,312 --> 00:01:58,644 So you're bi? 49 00:01:58,645 --> 00:02:00,912 No. They're dead... 50 00:02:00,913 --> 00:02:04,013 Car crash. 51 00:02:05,580 --> 00:02:06,646 You went home with... 52 00:02:06,647 --> 00:02:08,047 An undertaker. Mm-hmm. 53 00:02:08,048 --> 00:02:09,680 I fucked an undertaker once. 54 00:02:09,681 --> 00:02:10,913 You did? When? 55 00:02:10,914 --> 00:02:15,614 He told me sometimes they sew the mouths shut. 56 00:02:15,615 --> 00:02:17,248 [Groans] 57 00:02:17,249 --> 00:02:18,914 What about you, Brian? 58 00:02:18,915 --> 00:02:21,783 What'd you do? 59 00:02:23,250 --> 00:02:26,282 [Dance music] 60 00:02:26,283 --> 00:02:31,984 ♪ ♪ 61 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:36,418 I made it an early evening. 62 00:02:36,419 --> 00:02:38,518 You know, um, when I go, 63 00:02:38,519 --> 00:02:40,751 promise you won't let them sew my mouth shut? 64 00:02:40,752 --> 00:02:43,385 Because when I get to heaven and I meet Natalie Wood, 65 00:02:43,386 --> 00:02:45,786 I want to be able to say, "Natalie! It's Emmett! 66 00:02:45,787 --> 00:02:46,986 What happened that night?" 67 00:02:46,987 --> 00:02:48,720 [Laughter] 68 00:02:48,721 --> 00:02:50,486 Hey! 69 00:02:50,487 --> 00:02:54,221 Shouldn't you boys be getting to the hospital? 70 00:02:57,822 --> 00:03:00,655 Schmidt, Ted. 71 00:03:00,656 --> 00:03:02,822 - Are you family? - Friends. 72 00:03:02,823 --> 00:03:05,489 Uh, we know he's, like, in a coma and everything. 73 00:03:05,490 --> 00:03:07,923 We'd just like to be with him for a little while, if that's okay. 74 00:03:07,924 --> 00:03:09,823 I'll see. 75 00:03:09,824 --> 00:03:12,490 The nurses' station. 76 00:03:12,491 --> 00:03:14,757 I used to think it had something to do with radio. 77 00:03:14,758 --> 00:03:16,624 [Deep voice] "All nursing, all the time." 78 00:03:16,625 --> 00:03:17,591 [Chuckling] 79 00:03:17,592 --> 00:03:18,924 Hello. 80 00:03:18,925 --> 00:03:21,224 I'm Margaret Schmidt. 81 00:03:21,225 --> 00:03:23,892 I'm Ted's mother. 82 00:03:23,893 --> 00:03:26,893 If you need permission to see him, I'll give it. 83 00:03:26,894 --> 00:03:29,826 I... I'm sure he'd appreciate it. 84 00:03:29,827 --> 00:03:30,893 I'm Michael. 85 00:03:30,894 --> 00:03:33,260 This is Emmett and Brian. 86 00:03:33,261 --> 00:03:34,860 We're Ted's friends. 87 00:03:34,861 --> 00:03:37,661 He's still in the coma. 88 00:03:37,662 --> 00:03:40,361 He looks like he did when he was a boy, 89 00:03:40,362 --> 00:03:43,662 when he slept. 90 00:03:43,663 --> 00:03:47,830 They don't think he'll come out of it. 91 00:03:51,864 --> 00:03:53,897 I sat by his bed... 92 00:03:53,898 --> 00:03:55,464 All night. 93 00:03:55,465 --> 00:03:59,732 About 5:00 in the morning, it occurred to me... 94 00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:06,200 Loving someone's not the same as knowing them. 95 00:04:15,401 --> 00:04:18,567 [Faint dance music] 96 00:04:18,568 --> 00:04:20,635 ♪ ♪ 97 00:04:20,636 --> 00:04:23,337 Brian! 98 00:04:26,704 --> 00:04:30,170 [Birds chirping] 99 00:04:30,171 --> 00:04:32,236 Justin? [Knock at door] 100 00:04:32,237 --> 00:04:34,538 Justin, you're late! 101 00:04:37,639 --> 00:04:40,371 All right, I'm up. I'm up. 102 00:04:40,372 --> 00:04:41,738 You got ten minutes. 103 00:04:41,739 --> 00:04:44,540 I'm taking a shower, okay? 104 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:50,240 [Water running] 105 00:05:21,846 --> 00:05:23,879 I'm out of shampoo. 106 00:05:26,447 --> 00:05:28,679 I'll get you some. 107 00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:30,447 [Heart monitor beeping] 108 00:05:39,615 --> 00:05:41,781 Who do you think it was? 109 00:05:41,782 --> 00:05:44,382 I mean, who, uh, gave him the drugs? 110 00:05:44,383 --> 00:05:46,649 I bet it was that guy Blake who was cruising him all night. 111 00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:50,084 - Think we should tell someone? - No. 112 00:05:52,351 --> 00:05:56,117 His mom said she'd call us if there was any change. 113 00:05:56,118 --> 00:05:57,451 You know, he's the first. 114 00:05:57,452 --> 00:06:00,818 The first almost-dead guy I sort of had sex with. 115 00:06:00,819 --> 00:06:02,818 - You had sex with Ted? - You never had sex with Ted. 116 00:06:02,819 --> 00:06:06,086 - When did you have sex with... - Sort-of sex... 117 00:06:06,087 --> 00:06:07,785 At this semi orgy. 118 00:06:07,786 --> 00:06:11,319 "Semi"? When? 119 00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:13,753 You know that weekend that John-John's plane went down? 120 00:06:13,754 --> 00:06:15,187 Oh, God. 121 00:06:15,188 --> 00:06:17,620 They kept showing him on the beach with his shirt off. 122 00:06:17,621 --> 00:06:19,454 I didn't know whether to jerk off or weep. 123 00:06:19,455 --> 00:06:23,222 So did... So did you, like, plan it? 124 00:06:23,223 --> 00:06:25,755 It just sort of happened. 125 00:06:25,756 --> 00:06:27,422 Things do. 126 00:06:27,423 --> 00:06:29,689 [Laughs] 127 00:06:29,690 --> 00:06:33,190 It was Scott and Kevin, the Todds. 128 00:06:33,191 --> 00:06:35,357 And Ted shows up with my taxes, 129 00:06:35,358 --> 00:06:39,091 and all of a sudden, we're all doing it, and... 130 00:06:39,092 --> 00:06:41,157 He even tried to fuck me. 131 00:06:41,158 --> 00:06:44,658 He's in there. 132 00:06:44,659 --> 00:06:48,492 His life's like this... Dot on a screen. 133 00:06:48,493 --> 00:06:50,093 And it could be us. 134 00:06:50,094 --> 00:06:52,627 No, it could not be us... 135 00:06:52,628 --> 00:06:55,393 Because we know better. 136 00:06:55,394 --> 00:06:57,461 We know not to believe pretty little blonde boys 137 00:06:57,462 --> 00:07:00,361 who tell you that "it's really good shit," 138 00:07:00,362 --> 00:07:03,362 because that's what they all say. 139 00:07:03,363 --> 00:07:05,795 Ted didn't know that. 140 00:07:05,796 --> 00:07:08,329 And he didn't know that you only do drugs with your friends 141 00:07:08,330 --> 00:07:11,530 because they're the only ones that give a fuck about you. 142 00:07:15,231 --> 00:07:17,263 Now I've to go to work. 143 00:07:17,264 --> 00:07:19,731 I have to be brilliant. 144 00:07:19,732 --> 00:07:23,099 F. Scott Fitzgerald... 145 00:07:23,100 --> 00:07:26,366 Classic profile, famously handsome, 146 00:07:26,367 --> 00:07:28,733 and The Great Gatsby, 147 00:07:28,734 --> 00:07:32,566 which captures a particular American yearning. 148 00:07:32,567 --> 00:07:35,133 And what do I mean by that, hmm? 149 00:07:35,134 --> 00:07:36,767 [Laughs] 150 00:07:36,768 --> 00:07:40,501 Justin? 151 00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:44,968 Uh, yearning's when you want something really badly. 152 00:07:44,969 --> 00:07:48,102 Like... So bad, it hurts. 153 00:07:48,103 --> 00:07:50,069 Exactly. 154 00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:54,236 It needs to hurt to be worthy of the word. 155 00:07:54,237 --> 00:07:56,037 Otherwise, it's just wanting, 156 00:07:56,038 --> 00:07:58,737 as represented in "The Gatsby" 157 00:07:58,738 --> 00:08:02,371 by the green light across the water. 158 00:08:02,372 --> 00:08:06,272 You can see it, but you can't touch it. 159 00:08:09,374 --> 00:08:12,306 Mr. Hobbs. 160 00:08:12,307 --> 00:08:16,040 Mr. Hobbs, are your parents really paying for you 161 00:08:16,041 --> 00:08:18,173 to have another testosterone outburst? 162 00:08:18,174 --> 00:08:20,374 - I wasn't doing anything. - Exactly. 163 00:08:20,375 --> 00:08:21,707 But you will be after school. 164 00:08:21,708 --> 00:08:23,475 I have football practice. 165 00:08:23,476 --> 00:08:24,675 Not today. 166 00:08:24,676 --> 00:08:28,109 Today you'll be cleaning out the athletic room. 167 00:08:28,110 --> 00:08:30,042 The only thing we fight about in this room, 168 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:32,576 Mr. Hobbs... 169 00:08:32,577 --> 00:08:34,511 Is interpretation. 170 00:08:38,078 --> 00:08:39,543 Mrs. Schmidt, we're going to work. 171 00:08:39,544 --> 00:08:42,244 I... if you want, you can call me on my cell phone, if... 172 00:08:42,245 --> 00:08:45,212 They said he took an overdose of a... 173 00:08:45,213 --> 00:08:46,379 A drug I've never heard of. 174 00:08:46,380 --> 00:08:48,379 Well, he wasn't a... A drug user. 175 00:08:48,380 --> 00:08:52,013 He must have met someone that night... 176 00:08:52,014 --> 00:08:54,381 And took him home. 177 00:08:57,414 --> 00:08:59,347 May I ask you something, Michael? 178 00:08:59,348 --> 00:09:01,948 Sure. 179 00:09:01,949 --> 00:09:06,248 If my son had been straight, 180 00:09:06,249 --> 00:09:08,049 if he had taken a woman home, 181 00:09:08,050 --> 00:09:10,316 do you think she would have run off 182 00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:13,150 and left him there to die? 183 00:09:27,619 --> 00:09:29,652 Need some help? 184 00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:31,386 [Sighs] This sucks. 185 00:09:31,387 --> 00:09:33,619 Yeah. They need you at practice. 186 00:09:33,620 --> 00:09:35,453 How do you know they do? 187 00:09:35,454 --> 00:09:38,021 I thought you weren't into, like, sports and shit. 188 00:09:38,022 --> 00:09:39,387 Some. 189 00:09:39,388 --> 00:09:42,087 Yeah, well, you sure keep it a secret. 190 00:09:42,088 --> 00:09:46,056 I'm supposed to get all of this shit cleaned up out of here. 191 00:09:48,256 --> 00:09:50,355 Wow. You're pretty strong. 192 00:09:50,356 --> 00:09:53,190 [Chuckles] That's my other secret. 193 00:09:53,191 --> 00:09:55,256 I can't do this fucking copy. 194 00:09:55,257 --> 00:09:58,191 Excuse me for barging in. 195 00:09:59,358 --> 00:10:00,990 This won't take long. 196 00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:03,025 As you may or may not know, 197 00:10:03,026 --> 00:10:04,391 I'm Ted's lawyer. 198 00:10:04,392 --> 00:10:05,624 So? 199 00:10:05,625 --> 00:10:08,058 So you need to know Ted made a living will. 200 00:10:08,059 --> 00:10:10,192 - Do you have one? - No. 201 00:10:10,193 --> 00:10:11,526 Well, you should. 202 00:10:11,527 --> 00:10:15,493 But I'm not your lawyer, I'm his. 203 00:10:15,494 --> 00:10:18,293 Anyway, he's made you responsible. 204 00:10:18,294 --> 00:10:19,494 For what? 205 00:10:19,495 --> 00:10:22,094 For deciding, should he ever be incompetent 206 00:10:22,095 --> 00:10:23,461 or unable to make a decision, 207 00:10:23,462 --> 00:10:25,862 whether to be kept alive by extraordinary measures 208 00:10:25,863 --> 00:10:28,428 or be permitted to die. 209 00:10:28,429 --> 00:10:30,828 Are you telling me that Ted wants me to decide 210 00:10:30,829 --> 00:10:32,362 whether or not to pull the plug? 211 00:10:32,363 --> 00:10:34,295 I tried to talk him out of it. 212 00:10:34,296 --> 00:10:35,929 And how long have you known about this? 213 00:10:35,930 --> 00:10:39,196 - It doesn't matter how long. - Yeah, it does. 214 00:10:39,197 --> 00:10:42,897 I'm this secret you two have been sharing. 215 00:10:42,898 --> 00:10:44,364 When were you planning on telling me? 216 00:10:44,365 --> 00:10:46,598 I was hoping I wouldn't have to, 217 00:10:46,599 --> 00:10:48,965 that the situation would never arise. 218 00:10:48,966 --> 00:10:51,098 Well, it has. It's arisen now. 219 00:10:51,099 --> 00:10:53,234 And now you know. 220 00:11:15,837 --> 00:11:19,003 Suzanne Shepley, big whore... 221 00:11:19,004 --> 00:11:21,103 She'll blow you, but she won't fuck 222 00:11:21,104 --> 00:11:22,370 if you're in this school, 223 00:11:22,371 --> 00:11:25,871 only if you go somewhere else, preferably Catholic. 224 00:11:25,872 --> 00:11:27,805 She seemed like a dyke to me. 225 00:11:27,806 --> 00:11:29,239 No, man, she's not a dyke. 226 00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,972 She's a whore. There's a difference. 227 00:11:31,973 --> 00:11:34,407 [Both laugh] 228 00:11:37,341 --> 00:11:39,840 So you know Mary Frances Cottallutto? 229 00:11:39,841 --> 00:11:41,241 Hmm? 230 00:11:41,242 --> 00:11:43,541 So she comes over to interview me for the school paper 231 00:11:43,542 --> 00:11:46,508 about being this great athlete and shit. 232 00:11:46,509 --> 00:11:50,376 And it's 4:00, and my mom won't be home till 6:00. 233 00:11:52,010 --> 00:11:54,942 So I tell her what a touchdown is like, 234 00:11:54,943 --> 00:11:56,343 and then she grabs my dick. 235 00:11:56,344 --> 00:12:00,310 - No. - Oh, yeah, she went for it. 236 00:12:00,311 --> 00:12:05,145 Not only that, she unzips my fly. 237 00:12:05,146 --> 00:12:07,878 She's got my dick, 238 00:12:07,879 --> 00:12:09,779 and she's got all these rings on. 239 00:12:09,780 --> 00:12:13,812 They're cold, but her hand's warm. 240 00:12:13,813 --> 00:12:18,446 And she's rubbing... And rubbing. 241 00:12:18,447 --> 00:12:21,781 [Panting] Oh, yeah. 242 00:12:21,782 --> 00:12:24,947 And then she's got to go home, 243 00:12:24,948 --> 00:12:29,348 you know, and I'm there, 244 00:12:29,349 --> 00:12:31,416 and I'm... 245 00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:33,349 You're hard. 246 00:12:33,350 --> 00:12:36,517 [Exhales deeply] 247 00:12:45,085 --> 00:12:49,852 [Panting] 248 00:12:51,787 --> 00:12:54,720 [Moaning] 249 00:12:57,454 --> 00:13:00,920 ♪ You know I need, 'cause that's all I got ♪ 250 00:13:00,921 --> 00:13:03,087 ♪ come on ♪ 251 00:13:03,088 --> 00:13:04,821 [Both moaning] 252 00:13:04,822 --> 00:13:10,455 ♪ come on ♪ 253 00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:11,955 [Moaning, gasping] 254 00:13:11,956 --> 00:13:14,822 ♪ Come on ♪ 255 00:13:14,823 --> 00:13:16,189 [Grunts] 256 00:13:16,190 --> 00:13:20,689 ♪ Come on ♪ 257 00:13:20,690 --> 00:13:23,891 [Panting] 258 00:13:23,892 --> 00:13:26,191 [Door opens] 259 00:13:26,192 --> 00:13:29,225 Oh, shit. [Zipper closes] 260 00:13:31,392 --> 00:13:33,125 Shouldn't you be working? 261 00:13:33,126 --> 00:13:37,359 I, uh... I am working, Mr. Horner. 262 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:41,226 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 263 00:13:41,227 --> 00:13:44,094 How come I can't get my glutes to look like that? 264 00:13:44,095 --> 00:13:46,361 Maybe you're not properly visualizing the muscle group. 265 00:13:46,362 --> 00:13:48,095 Oh, I'm visualizing it, all right... 266 00:13:48,096 --> 00:13:49,428 On my face. 267 00:13:49,429 --> 00:13:52,329 [Both laugh] 268 00:13:53,897 --> 00:13:56,862 [Sighs] 269 00:13:56,863 --> 00:13:59,063 Why me? 270 00:13:59,064 --> 00:14:01,696 Why not his mother? 271 00:14:01,697 --> 00:14:02,963 Why not you? 272 00:14:02,964 --> 00:14:04,831 Because I can't decide what to wear in the morning. 273 00:14:04,832 --> 00:14:06,031 Who, in their right mind, 274 00:14:06,032 --> 00:14:08,031 would give me power of life and death? 275 00:14:08,032 --> 00:14:10,131 I couldn't do it, either. 276 00:14:10,132 --> 00:14:13,331 - I don't even like Ted. - Oh, come on, you do so. 277 00:14:13,332 --> 00:14:14,832 Well, not enough to be responsible 278 00:14:14,833 --> 00:14:15,833 for his fucking life. 279 00:14:15,834 --> 00:14:17,933 Well, he must have wanted you for a reason. 280 00:14:17,934 --> 00:14:19,800 Maybe he's secretly in love with you. 281 00:14:19,801 --> 00:14:23,968 "I love you. I'm comatose. Kill me." 282 00:14:26,002 --> 00:14:28,669 It's not over yet, Brian. He could still wake up. 283 00:14:31,936 --> 00:14:34,235 Chris? No way! 284 00:14:34,236 --> 00:14:37,335 Then don't believe me. 285 00:14:37,336 --> 00:14:40,203 But I thought you were in love with that Brian guy. 286 00:14:40,204 --> 00:14:42,036 [Rock music playing] 287 00:14:42,037 --> 00:14:45,837 Me and Chris... That's not love, Daph. 288 00:14:45,838 --> 00:14:48,237 - That's just fucking. - [Laughs] 289 00:14:48,238 --> 00:14:51,971 Oh, and I thought it was detention. 290 00:14:51,972 --> 00:14:54,105 Justin? 291 00:14:54,106 --> 00:14:57,240 Well, I gotta go. 292 00:14:58,773 --> 00:15:03,040 - Hey, Mrs. Taylor. - Hi, Daphne. 293 00:15:03,041 --> 00:15:04,840 Didn't you have art club this afternoon? 294 00:15:04,841 --> 00:15:06,240 I quit art club. [Music stops] 295 00:15:06,241 --> 00:15:08,741 You love art club. 296 00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:09,874 I'm not interested. 297 00:15:09,875 --> 00:15:12,341 Since when? Just last week... 298 00:15:12,342 --> 00:15:14,842 you don't know everything about me! 299 00:15:14,843 --> 00:15:16,809 A week's, like, a long time, 300 00:15:16,810 --> 00:15:20,644 things can change in a week. 301 00:15:22,111 --> 00:15:24,644 Well, I thought you might like to know I'm going to Niketown, 302 00:15:24,645 --> 00:15:28,178 but you're probably not interested in that either. 303 00:15:28,179 --> 00:15:30,211 - When? - Now. 304 00:15:30,212 --> 00:15:32,779 And you can drive. 305 00:15:54,149 --> 00:15:55,282 What? 306 00:15:55,283 --> 00:15:57,582 Just the thing you do with your hands... 307 00:15:57,583 --> 00:15:58,916 Like this. 308 00:15:58,917 --> 00:15:59,982 I do that, huh? 309 00:15:59,983 --> 00:16:03,017 - Yeah, you do. - Well, you should know. 310 00:16:03,018 --> 00:16:06,585 Yeah. [Sighs] 311 00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:13,585 People wake up from comas, sweetheart. 312 00:16:13,586 --> 00:16:15,152 Yeah, sure. 313 00:16:15,153 --> 00:16:17,819 Your uncle Vic... How long was he in his? 314 00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:20,186 - Nine days? - Ten. 315 00:16:20,187 --> 00:16:22,620 And I thought I'd lost him. 316 00:16:22,621 --> 00:16:24,554 I couldn't tell your grandmother it was AIDS at the time 317 00:16:24,555 --> 00:16:25,654 because she couldn't have dealt with it. 318 00:16:25,655 --> 00:16:26,954 I wanted to hear all about the white light 319 00:16:26,955 --> 00:16:28,254 and the... the tunnel 320 00:16:28,255 --> 00:16:31,822 and... and did Aunt Theresa get to heaven? 321 00:16:31,823 --> 00:16:34,289 First words out of his mouth, "Did I miss the Golden Globes?" 322 00:16:34,290 --> 00:16:37,690 [Laughs] 323 00:16:41,257 --> 00:16:42,923 So how is he? 324 00:16:42,924 --> 00:16:44,957 The same. 325 00:16:44,958 --> 00:16:48,224 No change. 326 00:16:48,225 --> 00:16:49,825 I'm going to go back a little later. 327 00:16:49,826 --> 00:16:53,692 I thought I'd take something to his mom. 328 00:16:57,293 --> 00:17:01,059 [Sniffling] 329 00:17:01,060 --> 00:17:04,027 What was that for? 330 00:17:04,028 --> 00:17:06,094 Turkey meat loaf... 331 00:17:06,095 --> 00:17:08,829 Lemon bars... They're great today. 332 00:17:10,929 --> 00:17:13,261 You're a good driver. 333 00:17:13,262 --> 00:17:15,096 Better than you. 334 00:17:15,097 --> 00:17:18,696 [Both laugh] 335 00:17:18,697 --> 00:17:21,129 Okay, slow down. This is a bit too fast. 336 00:17:21,130 --> 00:17:24,831 This is normal, and you just said I was a good driver. 337 00:17:27,098 --> 00:17:28,931 What? 338 00:17:28,932 --> 00:17:31,765 Nothing. 339 00:17:31,766 --> 00:17:34,099 It's just nice... you laughed. 340 00:17:34,100 --> 00:17:36,599 It's been a while. 341 00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:39,599 You know, maybe you could get another car, 342 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,233 let me have this for school. 343 00:17:41,234 --> 00:17:43,133 Oh, just hand it over, huh? 344 00:17:43,134 --> 00:17:45,934 I was 20 before I had a car. 345 00:17:45,935 --> 00:17:48,234 I was going out with Jay McLaughlin. 346 00:17:48,235 --> 00:17:49,934 He could have been your father. 347 00:17:49,935 --> 00:17:51,701 That's stupid. I wouldn't be me. 348 00:17:51,702 --> 00:17:53,601 He was my first real boyfriend. 349 00:17:53,602 --> 00:17:54,935 I'd be totally someone else. 350 00:17:54,936 --> 00:17:57,535 Learned with him what a kiss really was. 351 00:17:57,536 --> 00:17:59,569 - Gross. - [Laughs] 352 00:17:59,570 --> 00:18:02,570 Don't tell me. I don't want to know. 353 00:18:02,571 --> 00:18:03,903 Well, now you do. 354 00:18:03,904 --> 00:18:05,704 [Laughs] 355 00:18:08,972 --> 00:18:11,004 So do you have a boyfriend, Justin? 356 00:18:11,005 --> 00:18:14,238 [Tense music] 357 00:18:14,239 --> 00:18:19,072 ♪ ♪ 358 00:18:19,073 --> 00:18:20,539 You can tell me. 359 00:18:20,540 --> 00:18:22,073 I promise you, I won't tell your father. 360 00:18:22,074 --> 00:18:23,539 I don't. 361 00:18:23,540 --> 00:18:26,640 Then who's Brian? 362 00:18:26,641 --> 00:18:29,208 ♪ ♪ 363 00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:31,508 [Brakes screeching] 364 00:18:31,509 --> 00:18:33,074 ♪ ♪ 365 00:18:33,075 --> 00:18:36,109 Justin. Justin! 366 00:18:36,110 --> 00:18:44,177 ♪ ♪ 367 00:18:55,113 --> 00:18:59,412 [Clears throat] Mrs. Schmidt? 368 00:18:59,413 --> 00:19:00,645 Michael. 369 00:19:00,646 --> 00:19:04,113 I don't mean to bug you. Uh, I brought you this. 370 00:19:04,114 --> 00:19:05,813 It's from my mom... 371 00:19:05,814 --> 00:19:08,047 Meat loaf and lemon bars. 372 00:19:08,048 --> 00:19:11,415 The lemon bars are really good. 373 00:19:12,548 --> 00:19:15,415 Well, there's, um, still no change. 374 00:19:15,416 --> 00:19:18,049 They're watching and waiting, so... 375 00:19:18,050 --> 00:19:20,149 I thought I'd take a small break. 376 00:19:20,150 --> 00:19:24,616 I'm sure you could use one. 377 00:19:24,617 --> 00:19:27,016 He mentioned a Michael. 378 00:19:27,017 --> 00:19:28,784 I said, um, 379 00:19:28,785 --> 00:19:31,550 "tell me the name of one special friend." 380 00:19:31,551 --> 00:19:34,585 And he said, "well, there's a Michael." 381 00:19:34,586 --> 00:19:36,418 [Chuckles] 382 00:19:36,419 --> 00:19:39,419 Thank you for the food, dear. 383 00:19:39,420 --> 00:19:40,953 I'll, uh, stay a bit longer, 384 00:19:40,954 --> 00:19:42,953 and then I'll go to his condo tonight. 385 00:19:42,954 --> 00:19:46,620 His condo? 386 00:19:46,621 --> 00:19:48,520 Oh, for pajamas. 387 00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:50,020 I don't know if he even wears them, 388 00:19:50,021 --> 00:19:51,954 but if he does, 389 00:19:51,955 --> 00:19:54,922 He'll need them when, um... 390 00:20:03,990 --> 00:20:05,523 - [Cell phone rings] - Torso. 391 00:20:05,524 --> 00:20:06,756 It's me. 392 00:20:06,757 --> 00:20:08,557 Oh, my God, is he dead? 393 00:20:08,558 --> 00:20:09,957 No, but he's going to wish he was 394 00:20:09,958 --> 00:20:13,058 when he finds out his mom's going to his condo tonight for pajamas! 395 00:20:13,059 --> 00:20:15,125 Oh, shit! What if she finds his porn? 396 00:20:15,126 --> 00:20:16,959 And his magazines! 397 00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,925 And remember his 33rd birthday last year? 398 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:20,792 [Laughs] 399 00:20:20,793 --> 00:20:22,460 When we gave him those 33 dildos. 400 00:20:22,461 --> 00:20:23,826 That was hilarious. 401 00:20:23,827 --> 00:20:25,493 Well, it's not so funny anymore! 402 00:20:25,494 --> 00:20:27,494 We've got to go there and find all 33. 403 00:20:27,495 --> 00:20:29,093 - Wait! - What? 404 00:20:29,094 --> 00:20:31,427 What if he's given some as hostess gifts? 405 00:20:31,428 --> 00:20:35,629 [Knock at door] 406 00:20:38,996 --> 00:20:40,662 I don't have a lot of time. 407 00:20:40,663 --> 00:20:43,563 You have time to kiss your son. 408 00:20:53,932 --> 00:20:56,764 Hey, honey! His bath's ready. 409 00:20:56,765 --> 00:20:58,098 Oh. 410 00:20:58,099 --> 00:20:59,966 Did we know he was coming? 411 00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:01,432 No, we did not know. 412 00:21:01,433 --> 00:21:04,366 Well, it'd be nice if you'd call first. 413 00:21:04,367 --> 00:21:05,566 As I said, his bath's ready. 414 00:21:05,567 --> 00:21:06,800 So, if you want me to take him... 415 00:21:06,801 --> 00:21:08,933 I don't give a shit what Ted wants! 416 00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:10,834 I'm not doing it. Do you understand? 417 00:21:10,835 --> 00:21:12,934 [Scoffs] I told him you'd be this way. 418 00:21:12,935 --> 00:21:14,534 He has a mother. 419 00:21:14,535 --> 00:21:17,401 Yeah, would you wish this on yours? 420 00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:19,035 He has better friends. 421 00:21:19,036 --> 00:21:20,635 Well, that's for goddamn sure. 422 00:21:20,636 --> 00:21:21,835 Melanie, would you please... 423 00:21:21,836 --> 00:21:23,803 Look, did I barge in here at bath time? 424 00:21:23,804 --> 00:21:24,836 Was that me? 425 00:21:24,837 --> 00:21:26,669 Fuck bath time, and fuck you! 426 00:21:26,670 --> 00:21:28,803 - Hey, fuck you. - Just stop it! Both of you! 427 00:21:28,804 --> 00:21:30,804 So let's cut to the chase. Find somebody else. 428 00:21:30,805 --> 00:21:33,971 His mommy or Michael or Madonna... 429 00:21:33,972 --> 00:21:34,972 I don't care who! 430 00:21:34,973 --> 00:21:36,938 - But he chose you. - Well, he chose wrong. 431 00:21:36,939 --> 00:21:38,638 Yeah, that's what I said to him. 432 00:21:38,639 --> 00:21:40,272 I said, "Brian is not the person 433 00:21:40,273 --> 00:21:41,739 you want responsible for your life. 434 00:21:41,740 --> 00:21:44,873 He's a selfish, narcissistic, little fucking faggot." 435 00:21:44,874 --> 00:21:46,973 And let me tell you something, it's not because you suck cock. 436 00:21:46,974 --> 00:21:49,040 It's because you're a little fucking coward! 437 00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:51,840 So go. Get out! Now! 438 00:21:51,841 --> 00:21:55,709 [Baby fussing] 439 00:22:07,410 --> 00:22:10,943 You had no right talking to him that way. 440 00:22:10,944 --> 00:22:12,944 "No right"? 441 00:22:12,945 --> 00:22:15,544 Ted is lying there, on life support. 442 00:22:15,545 --> 00:22:17,612 He is probably never going to wake up, 443 00:22:17,613 --> 00:22:20,411 and he is depending on Brian to show him the decency, 444 00:22:20,412 --> 00:22:22,679 the kindness to release him. 445 00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:25,946 That's all the more reason to be kind. 446 00:22:25,947 --> 00:22:28,880 After all, he's the one who has to do it. 447 00:22:28,881 --> 00:22:30,747 Think how hard it must be... 448 00:22:30,748 --> 00:22:32,514 Or if it were one of us... 449 00:22:32,515 --> 00:22:36,581 If it was me lying there and you had to pull the plug. 450 00:22:36,582 --> 00:22:40,449 [Inhales deeply] I'm not sure I could. 451 00:22:40,450 --> 00:22:42,315 Maybe that's why you're so angry at him, 452 00:22:42,316 --> 00:22:43,649 because you know if it were you, 453 00:22:43,650 --> 00:22:46,750 you'd be as scared and angry as he is. 454 00:22:55,819 --> 00:22:57,684 [Rock music] 455 00:22:57,685 --> 00:23:03,385 ♪ If not tonight, then maybe never ♪ 456 00:23:03,386 --> 00:23:09,254 ♪ nobody's talking about staying forever ♪ 457 00:23:09,255 --> 00:23:11,687 ♪ come on home ♪ 458 00:23:11,688 --> 00:23:14,687 ♪ home to me ♪ 459 00:23:14,688 --> 00:23:22,689 ♪ ♪ 460 00:23:23,823 --> 00:23:26,289 ♪ can't feel a thing ♪ 461 00:23:26,290 --> 00:23:29,390 ♪ what can I say? ♪ 462 00:23:29,391 --> 00:23:35,358 ♪ When someone crazy runs the other way ♪ 463 00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:41,325 ♪ but I can tell you came to play ♪ 464 00:23:41,326 --> 00:23:46,792 ♪ oh, won't you come on home to me? ♪ 465 00:23:46,793 --> 00:23:52,227 ♪ Sometimes I want to be on my own ♪ 466 00:23:52,228 --> 00:23:56,461 ♪ When the last thing I need is to be... ♪ 467 00:23:56,462 --> 00:23:58,594 She knows. My mom knows. 468 00:23:58,595 --> 00:24:00,794 - Holy shit. - I've got to find Brian. 469 00:24:00,795 --> 00:24:01,896 What for? 470 00:24:01,897 --> 00:24:04,362 - He'll know what to do. - Like he cares. 471 00:24:04,363 --> 00:24:05,530 He wants me. 472 00:24:05,531 --> 00:24:07,296 How can you tell? 473 00:24:07,297 --> 00:24:08,796 Because I can. 474 00:24:08,797 --> 00:24:11,264 I'm going to live with him. I'm going to be with him. 475 00:24:11,265 --> 00:24:13,764 You'll see. Now, please, you've got to help me. 476 00:24:13,765 --> 00:24:15,664 I'm grounded. 477 00:24:15,665 --> 00:24:17,265 My mom said she'd better come home 478 00:24:17,266 --> 00:24:21,265 and find me reading Toni Morrison. 479 00:24:21,266 --> 00:24:23,499 [Sighs] 480 00:24:24,667 --> 00:24:27,666 Well, they don't get home until 7:00. 481 00:24:27,667 --> 00:24:30,700 And you do beat Beloved. 482 00:24:40,569 --> 00:24:42,335 That's better. 483 00:24:42,336 --> 00:24:43,702 I'm always telling him not everything in life 484 00:24:43,703 --> 00:24:45,135 needs to be centered. 485 00:24:45,136 --> 00:24:48,802 We can redecorate later. His mother's coming! 486 00:24:48,803 --> 00:24:50,170 Poppers. 487 00:24:50,171 --> 00:24:51,137 Oop! 488 00:24:51,138 --> 00:24:52,704 Cheddar, brie. 489 00:24:52,705 --> 00:24:54,471 I don't think there are particularly strong shame issues 490 00:24:54,472 --> 00:24:56,237 attached to cheese, Michael. 491 00:24:56,238 --> 00:24:57,571 Fine! Whatever. 492 00:24:57,572 --> 00:24:59,372 You check out the bedroom, I'll work out here. 493 00:24:59,373 --> 00:25:01,138 Okay. 494 00:25:01,139 --> 00:25:03,606 [Objects clatter in trash can] 495 00:25:07,207 --> 00:25:10,273 Falcon, Falcon... 496 00:25:10,274 --> 00:25:11,406 You've Got Mail? 497 00:25:11,407 --> 00:25:13,607 He masturbates to Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks? 498 00:25:13,608 --> 00:25:14,575 Ow! 499 00:25:14,576 --> 00:25:16,674 - Found 'em! - God! 500 00:25:16,675 --> 00:25:19,108 Jesus, look at this one! 501 00:25:19,109 --> 00:25:21,508 Hah! 502 00:25:21,509 --> 00:25:23,608 [Grunting] 503 00:25:23,609 --> 00:25:26,176 - Touché! - In this case, tushy! 504 00:25:26,177 --> 00:25:27,576 - Whoo! - Hah! 505 00:25:27,577 --> 00:25:31,210 [Grunting] 506 00:25:31,211 --> 00:25:33,844 [Exaggerated groaning] 507 00:25:33,845 --> 00:25:35,644 Dead! Right through the heart! 508 00:25:35,645 --> 00:25:37,611 - [Grunts] - All right! 509 00:25:37,612 --> 00:25:39,244 There's, like, a million of them in there, 510 00:25:39,245 --> 00:25:42,212 - and we've got to find them all. - We must. 511 00:25:42,213 --> 00:25:45,613 [Muttering indistinctly] 512 00:25:53,414 --> 00:25:56,147 Michael? 513 00:25:56,148 --> 00:25:58,214 Come here. 514 00:25:58,215 --> 00:26:01,115 [Dance music] 515 00:26:01,116 --> 00:26:09,150 ♪ ♪ 516 00:26:12,551 --> 00:26:17,450 ♪ holding on ♪ 517 00:26:17,451 --> 00:26:20,485 [Buzzer sounds] 518 00:26:20,486 --> 00:26:24,752 ♪ holding on to you ♪ 519 00:26:24,753 --> 00:26:26,785 Shit! Fuck! 520 00:26:26,786 --> 00:26:32,554 Brian! 521 00:26:32,555 --> 00:26:34,187 Shut up! 522 00:26:34,188 --> 00:26:36,387 [Car horn honks] 523 00:26:36,388 --> 00:26:38,488 Justin, I got to go home. 524 00:26:38,489 --> 00:26:40,788 But I... I have to find him. 525 00:26:40,789 --> 00:26:42,521 Well, what about the crazy lady? 526 00:26:42,522 --> 00:26:43,721 What crazy lady? 527 00:26:43,722 --> 00:26:46,222 You know, the weird one from the diner. 528 00:26:46,223 --> 00:26:47,690 You mean Debbie? 529 00:26:51,658 --> 00:26:53,690 So what do you think it means? 530 00:26:53,691 --> 00:26:56,124 I think it means he likes you. 531 00:26:56,125 --> 00:27:00,225 I think it means he loves me. 532 00:27:00,226 --> 00:27:02,358 Kind of flattering, in a way. 533 00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:06,026 He collects you the way you collect comics. 534 00:27:06,027 --> 00:27:07,625 It's just that... 535 00:27:07,626 --> 00:27:11,993 All this time, I... I never knew. 536 00:27:11,994 --> 00:27:15,727 There's a lot of things we don't know about each other. 537 00:27:15,728 --> 00:27:18,260 Like, did you know... 538 00:27:18,261 --> 00:27:20,994 I used to walk down the street in Hazelhurst, Mississippi, 539 00:27:20,995 --> 00:27:23,563 and the postman would spit at me? 540 00:27:26,130 --> 00:27:29,129 I don't know where my father was born... 541 00:27:29,130 --> 00:27:33,097 Or even who he is. 542 00:27:34,997 --> 00:27:37,997 I sat with my dead grandma for an hour 543 00:27:37,998 --> 00:27:39,730 and held her hand 544 00:27:39,731 --> 00:27:42,632 before I told anyone she was dead. 545 00:27:45,233 --> 00:27:48,600 How come we never tell each other these things, huh? 546 00:27:52,167 --> 00:27:53,401 Don't tell me. 547 00:27:53,402 --> 00:27:56,401 Brian... Am I right? 548 00:27:56,402 --> 00:28:00,234 Come on in. I'll make you a sandwich. 549 00:28:00,235 --> 00:28:02,135 - I actually just need to know... - And don't talk. 550 00:28:02,136 --> 00:28:04,636 I can figure it all out. 551 00:28:06,469 --> 00:28:10,637 Have a seat, honey, right there. 552 00:28:15,305 --> 00:28:18,304 Michael? It's me. 553 00:28:18,305 --> 00:28:21,139 You've got mail. 554 00:28:23,372 --> 00:28:24,605 I just want you to know 555 00:28:24,606 --> 00:28:29,139 Melanie feels terrible about what she said. 556 00:28:29,140 --> 00:28:30,506 Do you think I care? 557 00:28:30,507 --> 00:28:32,506 Look, it's upsetting for all of us, 558 00:28:32,507 --> 00:28:33,673 but at a time like this, we could try 559 00:28:33,674 --> 00:28:38,141 showing a little compassion, especially for Ted. 560 00:28:38,142 --> 00:28:40,141 Is there any word? 561 00:28:40,142 --> 00:28:42,408 The machines say he's still alive. 562 00:28:42,409 --> 00:28:45,409 Poor guy. 563 00:28:45,410 --> 00:28:49,475 What about us? 564 00:28:49,476 --> 00:28:51,009 We don't have any beeps or wires 565 00:28:51,010 --> 00:28:53,110 with little white dots telling us we're alive, 566 00:28:53,111 --> 00:28:55,276 so how do we know? 567 00:28:55,277 --> 00:28:58,077 I guess we just take each other's word. 568 00:28:58,078 --> 00:29:01,110 Maybe we know from what people expect from us. 569 00:29:01,111 --> 00:29:03,111 I mean, take Gus. 570 00:29:03,112 --> 00:29:07,378 He needs me to feed him, to change him. 571 00:29:07,379 --> 00:29:11,179 Knowing that tells me I'm alive. 572 00:29:11,180 --> 00:29:14,047 So, for me, right now it's him. 573 00:29:14,048 --> 00:29:18,047 What about me? 574 00:29:18,048 --> 00:29:21,581 Ted needs you now. 575 00:29:21,582 --> 00:29:24,148 So maybe that's what tells you you're alive. 576 00:29:24,149 --> 00:29:27,915 [Scoffs] 577 00:29:27,916 --> 00:29:29,982 You'll do the right thing... 578 00:29:29,983 --> 00:29:32,217 Whatever it is. 579 00:29:33,384 --> 00:29:36,350 You don't know that. 580 00:29:36,351 --> 00:29:39,518 [Heart monitor beeping] 581 00:29:57,521 --> 00:30:03,555 Fuck you. 582 00:30:06,022 --> 00:30:07,422 Fuck you... 583 00:30:07,423 --> 00:30:10,489 For going home with some tweaked-out little twinkie 584 00:30:10,490 --> 00:30:13,390 and thinking you got lucky. 585 00:30:18,391 --> 00:30:22,959 Did he let you eat his ass? 586 00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:25,893 Did he let you suck his cock? 587 00:30:28,126 --> 00:30:30,859 Well, I hope it was worth it. 588 00:30:33,393 --> 00:30:38,126 And fuck you for choosing me. 589 00:30:38,127 --> 00:30:40,294 I ought to let you lie here forever. 590 00:30:40,295 --> 00:30:42,529 How'd you like that? 591 00:30:47,263 --> 00:30:49,563 Can you hear me? 592 00:30:57,264 --> 00:31:01,232 You know, you're not so bad-looking. 593 00:31:02,799 --> 00:31:05,798 In fact... 594 00:31:05,799 --> 00:31:09,165 You look better like this. 595 00:31:09,166 --> 00:31:12,334 You should die more often... 596 00:31:13,834 --> 00:31:16,466 Or live... 597 00:31:16,467 --> 00:31:20,568 So that I don't have to say, "yes." 598 00:31:23,002 --> 00:31:26,301 "Yes, I'll do it. 599 00:31:26,302 --> 00:31:29,402 I'll give you what you want... 600 00:31:29,403 --> 00:31:33,469 what you need." 601 00:31:33,470 --> 00:31:35,936 But don't think it's for you. 602 00:31:35,937 --> 00:31:39,337 It's not. 603 00:31:39,338 --> 00:31:41,538 It's for me. 604 00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:54,872 [Rhythmic music] 605 00:31:54,873 --> 00:32:02,908 ♪ ♪ 606 00:32:02,909 --> 00:32:05,908 [Both moaning] 607 00:32:05,909 --> 00:32:13,743 ♪ ♪ 608 00:32:15,277 --> 00:32:18,278 [Both moaning, grunting] 609 00:32:26,312 --> 00:32:29,212 Jesus. 610 00:32:29,213 --> 00:32:30,778 This is my house! 611 00:32:30,779 --> 00:32:32,346 You've got your own. Go home! 612 00:32:32,347 --> 00:32:33,280 [Mouth full] I can't. 613 00:32:33,281 --> 00:32:35,512 - What? - I can't. 614 00:32:35,513 --> 00:32:36,980 My mom knows. 615 00:32:36,981 --> 00:32:39,380 Well, she can go to my PFLAG group at the center, 616 00:32:39,381 --> 00:32:40,513 every other Tuesday. 617 00:32:40,514 --> 00:32:42,348 I'll get her a T-shirt and a button. 618 00:32:42,349 --> 00:32:44,081 - Ma, please! - "Ma, please" what? 619 00:32:44,082 --> 00:32:45,881 I am proud to have a gay son. 620 00:32:45,882 --> 00:32:46,849 We know! 621 00:32:46,850 --> 00:32:49,215 - And brother. - Thanks, sis. 622 00:32:49,216 --> 00:32:50,449 I've always said it isn't who you love, 623 00:32:50,450 --> 00:32:51,949 it's how you love. 624 00:32:51,950 --> 00:32:55,216 Genitalia is simply God's way of accessorizing. 625 00:32:55,217 --> 00:32:56,717 This is not about you 626 00:32:56,718 --> 00:32:58,483 and the Gay Mother of the Year award. 627 00:32:58,484 --> 00:33:00,483 This is about Brian's one-night stand. 628 00:33:00,484 --> 00:33:02,850 - Not just one. - Don't bet on it. 629 00:33:02,851 --> 00:33:04,451 And who here even cares? 630 00:33:04,452 --> 00:33:07,318 I do! 631 00:33:07,319 --> 00:33:09,118 My dad threatened to disown me. 632 00:33:09,119 --> 00:33:10,285 He called me "a big queer." 633 00:33:10,286 --> 00:33:11,253 He didn't hit you, did he? 634 00:33:11,254 --> 00:33:12,752 Oh, come on, Uncle Vic. 635 00:33:12,753 --> 00:33:14,152 You're not going to listen to this shit? 636 00:33:14,153 --> 00:33:16,152 That's why I have to see Brian. 637 00:33:16,153 --> 00:33:18,987 - He'll let me stay with him. - I don't think so. 638 00:33:18,988 --> 00:33:21,687 Well, then... I'll go to New York. 639 00:33:21,688 --> 00:33:23,388 I'll become a hustler, and I'll sell my body 640 00:33:23,389 --> 00:33:25,255 to gross, old homos. 641 00:33:25,256 --> 00:33:27,455 I'll give you 20 bucks. 642 00:33:27,456 --> 00:33:28,822 [Slaps shoulder] 643 00:33:28,823 --> 00:33:31,722 Save him the train fare. 644 00:33:31,723 --> 00:33:33,256 I'm going to throw up. I gotta vomit... 645 00:33:33,257 --> 00:33:34,322 Upstairs bathroom... 646 00:33:34,323 --> 00:33:38,723 The one for guests and drama queens. 647 00:33:38,724 --> 00:33:40,023 [Laughs] 648 00:33:40,024 --> 00:33:42,024 It's not a joke, you know. 649 00:33:42,025 --> 00:33:44,358 Gay teens have a very high suicide rate. 650 00:33:44,359 --> 00:33:45,991 Unfortunately, not this one. 651 00:33:45,992 --> 00:33:48,726 [Cell phone dialing] 652 00:34:13,330 --> 00:34:14,795 I'm calling his mother. 653 00:34:14,796 --> 00:34:16,196 It's not our business. 654 00:34:16,197 --> 00:34:17,796 He may be telling the truth. 655 00:34:17,797 --> 00:34:19,997 And even if he isn't, she's got to be worried. 656 00:34:19,998 --> 00:34:21,796 She's not worried. 657 00:34:21,797 --> 00:34:23,331 Now she knows. 658 00:34:23,332 --> 00:34:26,231 It's not drugs. It's not booze. 659 00:34:26,232 --> 00:34:27,698 He didn't buy an automatic weapon 660 00:34:27,699 --> 00:34:29,898 to take down to the Spanish club. 661 00:34:29,899 --> 00:34:32,232 It's just cock. 662 00:34:32,233 --> 00:34:35,833 - [Door opens, closes] - Hi. 663 00:34:35,834 --> 00:34:38,166 How did he find you? 664 00:34:38,167 --> 00:34:40,700 They all find her. And now he won't leave. 665 00:34:40,701 --> 00:34:42,233 You got to do something. 666 00:34:42,234 --> 00:34:43,268 Like what? 667 00:34:43,269 --> 00:34:45,967 Like get him out of my house! 668 00:34:45,968 --> 00:34:47,234 He's upstairs. 669 00:34:47,235 --> 00:34:50,002 All right. I'm going. 670 00:34:50,003 --> 00:34:52,402 This is not how I wanted to spend my evening. 671 00:34:52,403 --> 00:34:55,869 By the way... 672 00:34:55,870 --> 00:34:58,703 Ted woke up. 673 00:34:58,704 --> 00:35:01,738 He's going to be okay. 674 00:35:12,239 --> 00:35:13,372 [Door opens] 675 00:35:13,373 --> 00:35:16,106 [Smooth jazz music] 676 00:35:16,107 --> 00:35:17,973 ♪ Ten ♪ 677 00:35:17,974 --> 00:35:19,206 ♪ kiss me on the lips ♪ 678 00:35:19,207 --> 00:35:23,308 ♪ ♪ 679 00:35:23,309 --> 00:35:26,174 What are you doing here? 680 00:35:26,175 --> 00:35:27,607 Waiting for you. 681 00:35:27,608 --> 00:35:30,742 Well, it's a relief, I'll say that. 682 00:35:30,743 --> 00:35:32,075 I like Ted. 683 00:35:32,076 --> 00:35:34,842 There's a real sweetheart in there somewhere. 684 00:35:34,843 --> 00:35:37,576 ♪ ♪ 685 00:35:37,577 --> 00:35:39,010 ♪ slowly ♪ 686 00:35:39,011 --> 00:35:40,610 Michael? 687 00:35:40,611 --> 00:35:42,110 ♪ ♪ 688 00:35:42,111 --> 00:35:44,011 ♪ touch me ♪ 689 00:35:44,012 --> 00:35:48,011 ♪ slowly ♪ 690 00:35:48,012 --> 00:35:49,344 ♪ seven ♪ 691 00:35:49,345 --> 00:35:51,579 ♪ hold it ♪ 692 00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:55,679 ♪ let's go straight to number one ♪ 693 00:35:55,680 --> 00:36:03,247 ♪ ♪ 694 00:36:03,248 --> 00:36:06,214 ♪ to number one ♪ 695 00:36:06,215 --> 00:36:11,215 ♪ ♪ 696 00:36:11,216 --> 00:36:14,248 ♪ number one ♪ 697 00:36:14,249 --> 00:36:19,216 ♪ ♪ 698 00:36:19,217 --> 00:36:22,217 ♪ to number one ♪ 699 00:36:22,218 --> 00:36:28,084 ♪ ♪ 700 00:36:28,085 --> 00:36:31,985 ♪ six ♪ 701 00:36:31,986 --> 00:36:33,952 ♪ lips ♪ 702 00:36:33,953 --> 00:36:36,085 ♪ ♪ 703 00:36:36,086 --> 00:36:39,953 ♪ five ♪ 704 00:36:39,954 --> 00:36:41,587 ♪ fingers ♪ 705 00:36:41,588 --> 00:36:44,087 - I've decided. - What? 706 00:36:44,088 --> 00:36:47,054 You and me... We're taking him home. 707 00:36:47,055 --> 00:36:49,821 Why you and me? Why... why me at all? 708 00:36:49,822 --> 00:36:51,921 Well, he can hardly go with Brian. 709 00:36:51,922 --> 00:36:53,722 And if I go, it looks a little... 710 00:36:53,723 --> 00:36:55,789 Fagin and Oliver Twist. 711 00:36:55,790 --> 00:36:58,056 Leaving me, huh? The harmless one. 712 00:36:58,057 --> 00:36:59,957 Thanks a lot. 713 00:37:05,592 --> 00:37:08,124 I'm calling your mother. I'm taking you home. 714 00:37:08,125 --> 00:37:10,991 I'm not going. 715 00:37:10,992 --> 00:37:12,958 You get my tits in a knot, sunshine, 716 00:37:12,959 --> 00:37:15,226 and you're going to be in deep shit. 717 00:37:15,227 --> 00:37:18,560 Excuse me. 718 00:37:21,527 --> 00:37:24,560 What are you studying in school? 719 00:37:24,561 --> 00:37:25,528 Hmm? 720 00:37:25,529 --> 00:37:27,228 It's called conversation. 721 00:37:27,229 --> 00:37:28,795 [Chuckles] 722 00:37:31,763 --> 00:37:33,628 Ready? 723 00:37:33,629 --> 00:37:36,896 I need to talk to Brian. I'll be there in a second. 724 00:37:47,198 --> 00:37:50,831 [Door opens, closes] 725 00:37:50,832 --> 00:37:54,532 Do you have anything to say? 726 00:37:54,533 --> 00:37:56,499 No. 727 00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:58,599 Well, I do. 728 00:37:58,600 --> 00:37:59,832 You can fuck him at your place. 729 00:37:59,833 --> 00:38:01,133 You can fuck him in his gym class. 730 00:38:01,134 --> 00:38:02,800 You can fuck him at the zoo. 731 00:38:02,801 --> 00:38:05,700 But you cannot fuck him in my mother's house... 732 00:38:05,701 --> 00:38:07,567 In my room. 733 00:38:07,568 --> 00:38:10,702 We're waiting! 734 00:38:13,102 --> 00:38:15,702 Okay, I'm going to go do this little job, 735 00:38:15,703 --> 00:38:17,169 and then I'm going to go see Ted at the hospital. 736 00:38:17,170 --> 00:38:19,070 You do whatever the fuck you want. 737 00:38:22,437 --> 00:38:24,137 [Door opens] 738 00:38:24,138 --> 00:38:28,704 Nobody knows if it's nature or nurture, being gay. 739 00:38:28,705 --> 00:38:29,804 Now they're all saying you can tell 740 00:38:29,805 --> 00:38:31,438 by the length of the index finger, 741 00:38:31,439 --> 00:38:33,672 although all of Michael's fingers are perfectly normal. 742 00:38:33,673 --> 00:38:35,105 He should have three kids and a beer belly, 743 00:38:35,106 --> 00:38:37,972 and he's about as gay as you get. 744 00:38:37,973 --> 00:38:41,674 Ma, give it rest! 745 00:38:47,508 --> 00:38:50,107 [Doorbell chimes musically] 746 00:38:50,108 --> 00:38:52,075 Listen! 747 00:38:52,076 --> 00:38:55,042 That's nice, huh? 748 00:38:55,043 --> 00:38:58,976 Not like that old buzzer at our house. 749 00:38:58,977 --> 00:39:00,043 Oh, hi! 750 00:39:00,044 --> 00:39:02,443 Um... 751 00:39:02,444 --> 00:39:04,410 I was admiring your chimes. 752 00:39:04,411 --> 00:39:06,643 You have a real nice place here. 753 00:39:06,644 --> 00:39:09,745 Oh, thank you. Uh, you must be... 754 00:39:11,612 --> 00:39:14,845 Rude little shit, isn't he? 755 00:39:14,846 --> 00:39:19,446 Um, I'm Debbie Novotny. 756 00:39:19,447 --> 00:39:21,913 And this is my gay son, Michael. 757 00:39:21,914 --> 00:39:25,813 Ma! 758 00:39:25,814 --> 00:39:28,014 I'm Jennifer Taylor. 759 00:39:28,015 --> 00:39:29,814 Jennifer. 760 00:39:29,815 --> 00:39:31,681 Honey? Who's there? 761 00:39:31,682 --> 00:39:34,582 It's no one! 762 00:39:39,083 --> 00:39:41,050 Listen, uh... 763 00:39:41,051 --> 00:39:43,150 If you ever need to talk to somebody, 764 00:39:43,151 --> 00:39:45,150 I work over at the Liberty Diner 765 00:39:45,151 --> 00:39:48,984 on Liberty Avenue... 766 00:39:48,985 --> 00:39:52,786 'Cause I know what you're going through... 767 00:39:52,787 --> 00:39:55,686 The finding out. 768 00:39:57,486 --> 00:39:59,752 I mean, I always knew about Michael. 769 00:39:59,753 --> 00:40:02,387 In fact, I told him, right? 770 00:40:03,621 --> 00:40:07,920 To spare him the pain of having to tell me. 771 00:40:07,921 --> 00:40:09,954 So... 772 00:40:09,955 --> 00:40:11,621 Jennifer... 773 00:40:11,622 --> 00:40:14,754 Don't ask, "are you?" 774 00:40:14,755 --> 00:40:17,455 Because it's never a question. 775 00:40:17,456 --> 00:40:20,955 Just say, "I know." 776 00:40:20,956 --> 00:40:24,091 Uh, thank you. 777 00:40:27,124 --> 00:40:28,557 [Door closes] 778 00:40:28,558 --> 00:40:30,424 You had to say all that? 779 00:40:30,425 --> 00:40:32,391 I was trying to help. 780 00:40:32,392 --> 00:40:33,793 You try too much. 781 00:40:39,860 --> 00:40:42,893 You're still wearing that same old coat. 782 00:40:42,894 --> 00:40:44,793 So someday you'll buy me a mink. 783 00:40:44,794 --> 00:40:45,761 [Chuckles] 784 00:40:45,762 --> 00:40:47,727 You're going to be a big success. 785 00:40:47,728 --> 00:40:51,428 Yeah, right. You'll freeze to death first. 786 00:40:51,429 --> 00:40:53,795 - What was that for? - You can be such an asshole! 787 00:40:53,796 --> 00:40:57,629 - What'd I do? - You don't know yourself! 788 00:40:57,630 --> 00:40:59,829 "Know thyself." 789 00:40:59,830 --> 00:41:02,096 Some Greek said that. 790 00:41:02,097 --> 00:41:03,896 Who was it? 791 00:41:03,897 --> 00:41:06,763 Zorba? 792 00:41:06,764 --> 00:41:10,964 I don't know. 793 00:41:10,965 --> 00:41:13,497 I don't know anything. 794 00:41:13,498 --> 00:41:16,666 Now take me home. 795 00:41:20,067 --> 00:41:21,666 Are you sure I can't help? 796 00:41:21,667 --> 00:41:24,633 I can do it. It's no big deal. 797 00:41:24,634 --> 00:41:26,633 I wish you'd let me drive you home. 798 00:41:26,634 --> 00:41:28,701 I already asked my friends. 799 00:41:28,702 --> 00:41:32,735 Michael, Emmett, Brian. 800 00:41:34,369 --> 00:41:36,501 I met them while you were asleep. 801 00:41:36,502 --> 00:41:40,402 - Oh. - They're very nice... 802 00:41:40,403 --> 00:41:42,736 Especially Michael. 803 00:41:42,737 --> 00:41:45,437 Yeah, Michael is... 804 00:41:45,438 --> 00:41:47,970 Especially special. 805 00:41:47,971 --> 00:41:49,837 Are you two... 806 00:41:49,838 --> 00:41:51,304 I mean... 807 00:41:51,305 --> 00:41:52,672 Oh, no. 808 00:41:52,673 --> 00:41:55,005 No, we, uh... 809 00:41:55,006 --> 00:41:56,305 He's just a friend. 810 00:41:56,306 --> 00:41:59,305 Well, he's a very good friend. 811 00:41:59,306 --> 00:42:01,505 He was very kind to me. 812 00:42:01,506 --> 00:42:03,340 I'm grateful you have him. 813 00:42:03,341 --> 00:42:04,839 Yeah, so am I. 814 00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:09,640 Because more than anything, I worry that you're alone... 815 00:42:09,641 --> 00:42:11,941 And that there's no one to look after you. 816 00:42:11,942 --> 00:42:13,407 I can take care of myself. 817 00:42:13,408 --> 00:42:14,941 Oh, I know you can. 818 00:42:14,942 --> 00:42:16,709 You've always been self-sufficient. 819 00:42:16,710 --> 00:42:21,242 I just... I wish you had someone to love you. 820 00:42:21,243 --> 00:42:23,710 I mean, if you did, maybe this wouldn't have happened. 821 00:42:23,711 --> 00:42:27,410 Mom, please. Let's, uh... 822 00:42:27,411 --> 00:42:29,010 I'm sorry. 823 00:42:29,011 --> 00:42:32,744 I know that it embarrasses you if I talk too much or... 824 00:42:32,745 --> 00:42:36,011 I get too emotional. 825 00:42:36,012 --> 00:42:39,446 But I can't help thinking that... 826 00:42:39,447 --> 00:42:42,012 If you hadn't woken up, 827 00:42:42,013 --> 00:42:45,447 then I would never have gotten the chance to let you know 828 00:42:45,448 --> 00:42:48,814 how proud I am that you're my son 829 00:42:48,815 --> 00:42:52,414 and that it doesn't matter to me what you are. 830 00:42:52,415 --> 00:42:56,781 Oh, I got over that a long time ago. 831 00:42:56,782 --> 00:43:01,549 And that whenever you're feeling alone... 832 00:43:01,550 --> 00:43:04,882 Or that no one loves you... 833 00:43:04,883 --> 00:43:08,250 That's not true... 834 00:43:08,251 --> 00:43:09,851 Because I do. 835 00:43:17,753 --> 00:43:19,885 Thank you... 836 00:43:19,886 --> 00:43:22,820 Mom, for, uh... For saying that. 837 00:43:30,822 --> 00:43:32,620 Now, say it three times and click your heels... 838 00:43:32,621 --> 00:43:36,188 "there's no place like home." 839 00:43:36,189 --> 00:43:38,288 You know, you guys really didn't have to do this... 840 00:43:38,289 --> 00:43:40,621 All the flowers and the groceries. 841 00:43:40,622 --> 00:43:42,723 One-stop shopping at the big Q-mart. 842 00:43:42,724 --> 00:43:44,823 Well, it's... it's nice. 843 00:43:44,824 --> 00:43:47,856 Only, can somebody tell me why I had to stay there 844 00:43:47,857 --> 00:43:49,757 three days after I woke up? 845 00:43:49,758 --> 00:43:52,157 They wanted to make sure you're still alive. 846 00:43:52,158 --> 00:43:55,558 On your best days, it's hard to tell. 847 00:43:55,559 --> 00:43:58,691 Okay, just so you don't freak out... 848 00:43:58,692 --> 00:44:01,826 Your dildos are missing... and your porn. 849 00:44:01,827 --> 00:44:06,360 We had to move it all, in case your mom found it. 850 00:44:06,361 --> 00:44:10,194 Well, I expect all 33 back... cleaned. 851 00:44:10,195 --> 00:44:13,427 [Laughs] 852 00:44:13,428 --> 00:44:16,461 - You should eat something, honey. - I'm not hungry. 853 00:44:16,462 --> 00:44:18,628 We bought you a whole fucking chicken. 854 00:44:18,629 --> 00:44:20,396 And you're gonna eat it. 855 00:44:29,365 --> 00:44:32,497 It always looks so much smaller. 856 00:44:32,498 --> 00:44:36,131 - What does? - Your life... 857 00:44:36,132 --> 00:44:38,765 Especially after returning from a near-death experience. 858 00:44:38,766 --> 00:44:40,565 Like watching the Oscars. 859 00:44:40,566 --> 00:44:42,299 "Immediately preceded by... " 860 00:44:42,300 --> 00:44:44,532 Both: "The Barbara Walters Special." 861 00:44:44,533 --> 00:44:47,467 [Both chuckle] 862 00:44:47,468 --> 00:44:49,433 I'm glad you're here. 863 00:44:49,434 --> 00:44:52,668 You are? 864 00:44:52,669 --> 00:44:57,301 Well, uh, I, um... 865 00:44:57,302 --> 00:45:00,168 What? 866 00:45:00,169 --> 00:45:02,135 Um... 867 00:45:02,136 --> 00:45:04,435 Uh... 868 00:45:04,436 --> 00:45:07,671 I'm glad you're here too. 869 00:45:09,604 --> 00:45:12,137 And if you ever want to talk about this 870 00:45:12,138 --> 00:45:15,437 or other stuff... 871 00:45:15,438 --> 00:45:17,205 "Other stuff"? 872 00:45:17,206 --> 00:45:18,804 You know, if there's some... 873 00:45:18,805 --> 00:45:20,772 You know, if there's something you can't talk about. 874 00:45:20,773 --> 00:45:22,706 Like what? 875 00:45:22,707 --> 00:45:24,406 I don't know. 876 00:45:24,407 --> 00:45:28,573 You know, maybe if you talk about it, it might help it. 877 00:45:28,574 --> 00:45:32,607 But, you know, you might not get you what you want... 878 00:45:32,608 --> 00:45:36,174 But... 879 00:45:36,175 --> 00:45:39,541 Aw, shit. 880 00:45:39,542 --> 00:45:44,209 Are you going to come eat the chicken? 881 00:45:44,210 --> 00:45:46,510 I'm going to arrange the daisies. 882 00:45:50,344 --> 00:45:52,144 I saw you... 883 00:45:52,145 --> 00:45:54,810 Fucking... 884 00:45:54,811 --> 00:45:57,211 When I woke up. 885 00:45:57,212 --> 00:46:00,711 I thought... 886 00:46:00,712 --> 00:46:04,812 "I'm in hell, and this is my punishment... 887 00:46:04,813 --> 00:46:08,781 watching Brian Kinney fucking for all eternity." 888 00:46:10,447 --> 00:46:13,280 You should be so lucky. 889 00:46:13,281 --> 00:46:17,414 [Scoffs] 890 00:46:17,415 --> 00:46:21,048 Why me? 891 00:46:21,049 --> 00:46:22,816 Why did you choose me? 892 00:46:30,817 --> 00:46:33,550 My mother couldn't do it. 893 00:46:33,551 --> 00:46:35,550 [Scoffs] Michael and Emmett... 894 00:46:35,551 --> 00:46:37,385 couldn't do it. 895 00:46:37,386 --> 00:46:40,351 But you could, 896 00:46:40,352 --> 00:46:44,085 'cause you're a heartless shit. 897 00:46:44,086 --> 00:46:47,386 You could pull the plug, and you wouldn't cry. 898 00:46:47,387 --> 00:46:49,521 And you'd know when it's time to go. 899 00:46:53,055 --> 00:46:54,720 ♪ Let's get soaking wet ♪ 900 00:46:54,721 --> 00:46:57,788 [Dance music] 901 00:46:57,789 --> 00:47:06,023 ♪ ♪ 902 00:47:09,357 --> 00:47:10,596 I want it to be you. 903 00:47:10,597 --> 00:47:11,597 What? 904 00:47:11,598 --> 00:47:14,066 I want it to be you! 905 00:47:14,067 --> 00:47:17,403 I'll put it in writing. 906 00:47:17,404 --> 00:47:19,705 I want it to be you too. 907 00:47:19,706 --> 00:47:22,642 You pull my plug. 908 00:47:22,643 --> 00:47:25,277 And you pull mine. 909 00:47:25,278 --> 00:47:33,319 ♪ ♪ 910 00:47:37,500 --> 00:47:42,500 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 911 00:49:22,395 --> 00:49:24,397 ♪ come on ♪ 912 00:49:28,434 --> 00:49:31,104 ♪ I wanna hear it ♪ 913 00:49:32,672 --> 00:49:33,673 ♪ let's get soaking wet ♪60590

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